#the three evangelists | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thydungeongal · 3 months

Text

Gonna demonstrate just how hilariously broken the Diplomacy skill is in D&D 3.5 by making a game legal level 6 character who is ready to go solve The Red Hand of Doom (a classic module from D&D 3.5 that in my opinion still largely holds up!)

Half-Elf for a +2 racial bonus on Diplomacy checks. The typing of that bonus is important, because you can't stack multiple bonuses of the same type. Untyped bonuses stack. (Dodge bonuses are a special exception.)

We'll start with Bard. Technically we could also use Factotum from Dungeonscape, but there's a Half-Elf Bard substitution level that allows us to switch out countersong for an ability that effectively allows us to cast calm emotions with a DC equal to our Diplomacy check, which is a fun trick to have.

Bard has all the skills that grant synergy bonuses to Diplomacy on their class list. At 1st level we will need at least the following skill ranks:

Bluff 4

Diplomacy 4

Knowledge (nobility and royalty) 4

Sense Motive 4

We will be multiclassing but since we have a level in Bard our maximum ranks will be as if we had all of those as our class skills. Synergy bonuses hit at 5 ranks, so while we want Diplomacy to be at maximum possible ranks, those three other skills don't need more than 5 ranks each.

For our feat we'll grab Negotiator for another untyped +2 bonus.

At level 1 our Diplomacy bonus is +8 (4 from ranks, +2 from half-elf, +2 from Negotiator) without taking into account our Charisma modifier. Pretty good, but we can do better. At this point it's good to mention that our character has to be Chaotic Good.

Our character then multiclasses into Warlock for two levels. Warlock has Bluff and Sense Motive as class skills, but sadly only 2+Int modifier skill ranks per level. Assuming a +0 Int mod we can at the very least get our Bluff and Sense Motive to 5 and our Diplomacy (we'll have to pay double for a single rank of Diplomacy while taking Warlock because it's not a Warlock class skill). That means that two of our Diplomacy synergies come into play for two untyped +2 bonuses. While our first least invocation choice is moot, the second one is important: at level 2 we'll be able to pick up beguiling influence.

You can invoke this ability to beguile and bewitch your foes. You gain a +6 bonus on Bluff, Diplomacy, and Intimidate checks for a period of 24 hours.

Just have that on forever from now on.

Also at level 3 we might as well pick up Skill Focus (Diplomacy) for one more untyped +3 bonus.

So, at level 3:

5 ranks, +2 from half-elf, +2 from Negotiator, +2 from Bluff synergy, +2 from Sense Motive synergy, +6 from beguiling influence, +3 from Skill Focus. +22 at level 3.

But we're not done yet: it's time our character found religion. Take a level of Cleric. Specifically the Cloistered Cleric variant from Unearthed Arcana (lower hit points, limited armor proficiencies, automatic access to Knowledge domain, higher skill points) as well as the No Turning variant from Dragon #353. The skill point boost allows us to get the missing rank of Knowledge (nobility and royalty) which is now a class skill for us, as well as maxing out Diplomacy to 7 ranks. The No Turning variant means we don't have the ability to turn undead, but in exchange we can pick up this thing:

EVANGELIST You travel far and wide, making showy public sermons and seeking converts to your religion. Level: 1st. Replaces: Turn or rebuke undead. Benefit: You gain a +2 bonus on diplomacy checks. An innate talent for magic grants you the following spell-like ability as a 1st-level caster: 2/day - comprehend languages. At 7th level, you gain the following spell-like ability as a 7th-level caster: 1/day - tongues.

As for our domains? Technically as a Cleric we can just be a non-denominational Cleric who gets their domains from belief. In addition to the Knowledge domain we gain automatically from being a Cloistered Cleric, let's pick up Joy and Mind.

JOY DOMAIN Granted Power: You gain a +4 sacred bonus on Diplomacy checks.

MIND DOMAIN Granted Powers: Gain a +2 bonus on Bluff, Diplomacy, and Sense Motive checks.

We're at level 4 now. Our Diplomacy is at 7 ranks. We have three +2 synergy bonuses, as well as a bunch of other bonuses from other sources. let's tally those up:

7 + 2 (half-elf) + 2 (Negotiator) + 6 (synergies) + 3 (Skill Focus) + 6 (beguiling influence) + 2 (evangelist) + 6 (domains). +34 at level 4.

For our final two dips we're going to pick up a level of Incarnate from the Magic of Incarnum (weird magic system that is all about making temporary magic items out of soul stuff?) and Binder from Tome of Magic. Both classes have Diplomacy as class skill so we get our ranks to 9, and this is the stuff we pick up:

Silvertongue Mask

The soulmeld draws on the souls of quick-witted and slick-tongued heroes, helping to guide the meldshaper in beguilement or negotiation. You shape incarnum into a silver-blue mask that you wear over your face. Your silvertongue mask grants you a +2 insight bonus on Bluff and Diplomacy checks. Essentia: Every point of essentia you invest in your silvertongue mask increases the insight bonus by 2.

At level 1 we're limited to binding only one essential into our mask, oh no. Well, that's still a +4 bonus for a single dip.

And finally we'll be making a deal with Naberius. I'll skip the text and show exactly what we'll pick up:

Silver Tongue: You can take 10 on Diplomacy and Bluff checks even if distracted or threatened. In addition, you can make a rushed Diplomacy check as a standard action and take no penalty. (Normally, a rushed Diplomacy check requires a full-round action and imposes a -10 penalty on the check.)

Tallying up all those final bonuses, at level 6 we have +40 to Diplomacy with no penalty for rushing the check. We can always elect to take 10 on a Diplomacy check. Let's look at the ol' Diplomacy chart.

Taking 10 and with a +40 bonus we simply can't not hit that DC of 50 to turn someone from Hostile to Helpful. (Remember, the DCs are flat.) We're set for Red Hand of Doom, Pacifist run.

#long post

301 notes · View notes

crooked-wasteland · 7 days

Note

How do you feel about Charlie as a character?

When someone brings up Charlie to me, three scenes immediately come to mind:

Charlie whining that being direct and using her status and responsibility to influence change is "mean".

When she's frantically panicking over how the hotel is not "working", but instead of actually specifying the events in the series that brought the cast together, she only mentions the things she herself suggested, despite her own ideas having been useless at best and actively detrimental to the people in her care at worst.

When she vents to Alastor about Vaggie not telling Charlie about being an angel, she doesn't once look at the situation from Vaggie's perspective of being no different than any other sinner, she demands to know what about her is untrustworthy. Entirely self absorbed.

Medrano has stated that she sees both Vaggie and Charlie as self-insert characters. Putting aside the Freudian self-cest implications, I feel that Medrano's self righteousness and superficial idea of kindness are on full display in Charlie's character. As a person, Charlie is insufferable. She inserts herself in ways people ask her not to, she has a surface level form of empathy, and she exists in a world where her intention supercedes the consequences of her actions. She is nothing but kind and understanding to everyone around her, a perpetual victim of people snubbing her, but she perseveres nonetheless.

Charlie's line in particular about Vaggie encouraging her to take control of a situation being "mean" is clearly how Medrano hand waves her own responsibility to the overall culture of her fandom. To try and regulate anything would be her being "mean", when in reality it is a way of not taking responsibility for the consequences of her own behavior and encouraging the hostility within the fandom.

Furthermore, the fact that both Charlie and Vaggie are two qualities of a single person explains why neither of them have any nuance. It's why Charlie wants to "help" the Sinners in Hell despite them generally accepting and being content with their lives, revelling in their "sins". It's why Charlie's skit for Angel and Pentious has dogmatic language about the "right" way to live one's life. And it's why Vaggie is never explored as being an exterminator who once was so successful as an executioner that she was considered the best of the best, and yet when faced with a black and white ethical concept of killing a child, she immediately has a change of heart.

There is no internal conflict or nuance for either of these characters because, ultimately, both are self righteous caricatures of the director who is broadcasting how much of a "good" person she thinks she is. That she knows what is best for everyone because she just wants to help, regardless of anyone else's desires or situations.

Small edit to point out this is a theme in her works. It directly parallels Blitz in Truth Seekers telling Moxxie that he is "hard" on him because he knows that Moxxie can be "better". And instead of just talking to Moxxie or encouraging him to keep growing, he instead uses manipulation and abuse to "persuade" Moxxie to change. Just like how Charlie imposes her own desires on others and then just keeps "suggesting" that they change. Because, really, Charlie and Blitz know what's the best for everyone around them.

It's why I am vehemently opposed to the idea that anything about Hazbin Hotel is a criticism of Christianity. Because in the end, Charlie is an evangelist spreading her teachings and Good Word to the sinners to save their souls, whether they like it or not.

It's not hard to see how Medrano sees herself in these qualities, and the passive aggressive self righteousness is thinly veiled under a smile and "good intentions".

#vivziepop critical #vivienne medrano #vivziepop #vivziepop criticism #hazbin hotel critical #spindlehorse criticism #spindlehorse critical #hazbin hotel critique #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin critical #hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar

127 notes · View notes

hemlockdrunk · 9 months

Text

ugly hand-drawn meme that comes two months late but eh :3

#the three evangelists #debout les morts #yes that's my design for oldoosler no criticism will be taken #it's so stupid im sorry

6 notes · View notes

zsakuva · 1 month

Note

I’ve noticed that listener tends to usually either have “bad”, very absent parents, or no parents. And I think most of the sakuverse characters also tend to have poor relationships with their father, but not usually with their mother. Is that an intentional/convenient choice, or is there maybe creative reason? I haven’t gone through all your videos yet since I only recently subscribed, so take my observations with a grain of salt LOL

Most of the time it's a creative choice to add further depth to the characters and give them a different point of view/personality.

Andrew = Catholic Evangelist parents who couldn't accept Andrew's brother for being gay, and their ideals were pushed onto both sons which still affects Andrew to this day

Isaac = No parents due to the actions of his grandfather, leading to major trauma. His mother wasn't involved with the grandfather's work so was mostly there in Isaac's childhood to protect him from it/keep him company

Elias = No mother due to her work which led to major trauma; Rocky relationship with his father because of the expectations suddenly put on him being the heir of a gang he never wanted to join

Kayson = Absentee father who chose work, but is now trying to make amends; Grew up with a single mother of three sons, and Kayson (as the eldest) became a role model for them

These are a few examples! Any sort of disconnect/absence of parents will absolutely have a reason for a character's development and how they handle issues~

#zsakuva #sakuverse #audio roleplay #boyfriend audios

55 notes · View notes

soulrestinginstpetersburg · 6 months

Text

Happy feast of Saint Luke the evangelist ☦❤

Born in Antioch, he witnessed Christ's miracles and listened to His preaching, and decided to follow Him. He was one of the 70 apostoles and was sent to spread the gospel. He wrote the Gospel at the request of other christians in his sixties. He is considered the founder of icon painting, painted three icons of Theotokos, who he met, and icons of St. apostoles Peter and Paul. At 84., idolaters hanged him for Christs sake in city of Thebes in Boeotia. His relicts were transfered to Constantinople during the reign of emperor Constantius.

#orthodoxy #orthodox christianity #eastern orthodoxy #orthodox #eastern orthodox #orthodox church #christianity #orthodox christian #church

79 notes · View notes

shini--chan · 7 months

Note

Could I request flight and reaction from the headcannon lists for America, China, and Japan? I absolutely adore the way your characterization of them. Even though I don’t follow hetalia actively anymore I always find myself coming back to your work because I love their dynamics so much

Thank you for your kind words. One small thing though - the templates are to be requested as a whole and not mixed. Should have stated that more clearly in the info post and will update it after this.

This one is about America, I'll be posting the China and Japan ones seperately.

Yandere Character Sheet II

1p America - Alfred F. Jones

Blend in - Are the red flags obvious? Are they even aware that their behaviour is wrong? Do they even care?

When it comes down to it, Alfred fully buys into the trope of American exceptionalism fully. So much so, that he is bristling with self confidence and charm to the point where you'll probably overlook or even justify his more … unorthodox behaviour until it is too late. That is, if you don't hate him or a die hard realist. Or hold fast to some ideology that depicts him in a bad light.

As per usual, the warning signs will all be very noticeable in hindsight. Though, if you are astute enough, you'll consciously catch on to some of them early on. Else, you'll occasionally be plagued by a feeling of something just not being right. Some of the red flags are:

He limits who you are allowed to talk to. At times, America can have a very black-and-white world view. Of course, he is the good guy and everything is just and moral. Even when he dirties his hands, it is all for the greater good. Thus, the bad guys are all those that don't fall in the neat lines of his high end morality. You are not allowed to talk to them, or even hear them speak, or else they will corrupt you. The only case he'll make an exception is if you are itching to join him on his crusade to either redeem them or defeat them.

Along the same vein - he is very resistant to criticism. At times, he internalises the saying "America is the best country on Earth" a bit too much. On mundane things he can very well take your feedback with grace. He is even open to pondering on concepts that are alien to him, if he is in a good mood. Though, if you try to change his opinion on something like his moral code or the lifestyle he is currently pursuing, then you'll find yourself running against a brick wall. It takes very long for him to admit to being the bad guy in something, or even just to being wrong. And even then, he'll try to sugarcoat it as much as possible.

Again in the same category - he can be controlling of the media you consume. Think about those hard right wing evangelists that think watching certain movies makes you gay. He might allow you to watch a series or read a book that he considers despicable, but only if you have a certain opinion on it.

He always wants to know where you are or what you are doing. He'll frame it so that he comes off as the concerned boyfriend, or explain it as having had bad experiences with people in the past. Both will be true, but what is also true is that he is possessive and controlling.

America is a sore loser, a very sore loser. He is neigh incapable of tolerating somebody being better than him. Hell, he even has difficulties in tolerating somebody being equally good as him in something he deems important. You are no exception here, no matter how much he “loves” you.

Perhaps in the odd moment of deeper introspection Alfred will admit that what he is doing is wrong. However, he'll be quick to brush it off as "the ends justify the means". Though, if pushed far he'll break down and sink into deep shame, then trying desperately to right all his wrongs. That is, if he doesn't bury himself in copious self-righteousness and toxic self-interest beforehand.

Compatriot - Who aids them? Who condemns them? Are there ways you can convince their friends/colleges/underlings to help you?

Alfred has three types of people who aid him. First are the sycophants, those the hang onto his every word and laud and applaud whatever he does. Maybe their livelihood depends on him, or they are desperate to get in his good books. Eitherway, they'll treat his every whim as an order, morals be damned. Their opinion on his treatment of you doesn't matter at all in that case, what matters is that they'll act in his interests.

Second, are those that are genuinely on his side, that share his view of god and the world. These are the people that might chide him for his treatment of you at times. That being said, if you act like you are a happy couple, you'll also be treated as such and they'll turn a blind eye to all the red flags.

Thirdy, there are the people that comply with him due to fear. Those that look at him and see the boy king that dropped two atomic bombs on Japan and showed no remorse afterwards. These are the people he has a gun pointed at, be it literally or figuratively. They will comply with Alfred if he calls on them, but they won't be enthusiastic about it. They might even try to discreetly help you.

As to those that condemn him - they are many in number, though only few will be overt about it. Alfred has a tendency to steamroll over other people to get what he wants. His tendency to selfishness has won him many enemies and thus there are quite a few people that are willing to help you. Now, a lot of the time their feelings and opinion of you won't matter, they just want a chance to pay America back for all the injustices it has inflicted on them, perhaps even with interest. In that way, you won't have much convincing to do.

Though when it comes to those that submit to him - either bribery or tricking them will work. Or you can convince them to help you if the blame for your escape can be shifted onto somebody else, or if the situation can be framed to make it look like you managed to flee entirely on your own. Concerning those that are loyal to him - in some select cases you can succeed in getting away by appealing to their own self interest or, again, by tricking them. However, there are also those amongst his circle of confidents that don't see him as a demigod and still side with him. When it comes to that sort, you can convince them that Alfred is sick in the head and that the only way to cure him is to remove you from his side, and then they'll orchestrate events to make that happen.

America's politicians and other high class people may also decide to step in if they think that Alfred is becoming too distracted because of his "relationship" with you or if he causes an aggrievious international incident. Watch out, though! Poor communication kills. If you don't convey your intentions or matters go haywire, they might decide that the best way to deal with the problem would be a bullet to the brain.

Dominion - What actions are especially pleasing to them?

On a large part, Alfred wants to have the American dream for himself, even if his version of it isn't quite as humble. He wants to come home to you showering him with affection and doting on him and catering to his needs. But above all, Alfred wants you to elevate any boredom that he might feel.

In any case, he would rather be frustrated or angry with you than bored. That being said, you'll want to avoid him falling into either state.

Travel with him abroad, introduce him to new cultures if you can. Engage him in debates, do sports with him. Though, if you don't want to play a (sports) game with him, he does expect you to be on the sidelines and cheer him on as he plays. He is always up for new movies or series, or he'll allow you to drag him to a library or a comic store. Alfred also believes in being a self made person, so if you have ambitions or interests (as long as it's something he is ok with) he'll gladly help you on your personal journey. Be careful, though - he might end up shaping you more than you shape yourself.

Aside from a very active leisure time, he wants you to be a loyal and caring spouse. Cook his meals and give him massages, ask about his day and don't start fights (he'll always be the one to end them, and at times, it will be anything but pretty). If you behave well, he'll let you out, maybe even take you to a party or even another country with him.

Flight - What do you have to do in order to escape them?

This is actually a tricky question to answer. You see, Alfred is big on security but also a short term thinker. Either way, what you must do to slip out of his grasp is also largely dependent on your relationship with him before escaping.

If has to drag you into his house kicking and screaming, then it will make things a lot more difficult. He’ll be expecting you to make a break for it, and will devise certain ways to break your will. You might think that your personality might be important to him, but that is only partially true; he is far more enamoured with the idea of who you can be for him than who you are. Alfred has a picture in mind of who you can be, the best version of you, in his not so humble opinion and if he has to play cat-and-mouse games to help you reach that goal, then so be it.

Most of the time, he’ll keep you under lock and key - you would have to be very clever and skillful or have help to escape then. Though there will be instances where he’ll play release and catch with you - he’ll allow you to escape under controlled conditions only to capture you and haul you back home. This would be to drive the point home that you can’t evade him forever.

The more you are inclined towards him, the more freedoms he’ll allow you; that is, if there is no danger of you stealing the spotlight from him. That being said, he’ll still keep a close eye on you - your phone will be checked on regular intervals and he’ll use it to track you. All your financial transactions (insofar as they are digital or per card) will be monitored and he'll do background checks on everybody you interact with on a regular or semi-regular basis.

In general, it has to be said that he isn’t omnipotent or infallible, even if he tries to showcase himself at times. There will be moments where he slips up, mistakes that he overlooks. In total, he is a short-term thinker and emotionally charged. If you can get him to trip over his own lines (and it is easier than you might think) then you can go galavanting away.

Hospitality - What is your life like with them? How much does it deviate from your former life?

This is a fort where Alfred loves to show off - anything you want, just say it, and he’ll already be pulling out his wallet. He won’t hesitate to have you settled in a pent house or a mansion and have you wine and dine. For him, this is also a way to tie you to his side - isn’t personal security more comfortable and important than freedom, eh? If you want for nothing because he gives everything you are allowed to want to you, then why should you try to flee.

Aside from that, he won’t keep you in one place for a long time. Alfred wants to be the only real constant in your life and one way through which he shall achieve this would be to uproot you every now and then. It would also have the dual purpose of making it very difficult for you to plan an escape. In the same vein, he prefers his life to be eventful, and that will be reflected in his relationship with you. In the minor cases, it is small projects and that goes up to the major cases, that are historic events. Longer times of peace or monotony make him antsy and more prone to doing something impulsive. If you aren’t involved in all the drama and action, then you’ll be regaled with hour long stories of it.

In that way, you have less peace and quiet than in your former life and also less privacy, because he tends to use you as a cure for boredom and restlessness. At times you’ll ask yourself if he sees you more as a doll than a person with agency.

Since he also has many enemies, you might find yourself in the crosshairs because of him. In comparison to Alfred, you are probably the weak link (or he at least does his best to frame it that way to other people) so you’ll be targeted in order to hurt him. That way, you might find yourself kidnapped, threatened and tortured. And all of this would be followed by Alfred going on a rampage in order to rescue you. A lot of blood will be spilled and all because of you.

Afterwards, he’ll just want to lie in your arms, maybe have sex, just imitating what all those movie characters do after a successful mission. Generally, he wishes for you to worship the ground that he walks upon - while he can live with your ire and hatred, it won’t be a smooth, nice ride for either of you if that is the case. If it is the case, then you have to be moulded into shape.

It would be re-educated, but he would never use that word for what he is doing to you; it is such an ugly word, a communist word, a communist principle as how could he ever do such a thing. Instead, it would be redeeming you, bring you on the right path. In truth, he has just watched too many Hollywood movies and doesn’t know when to take a no. It would be a matter of chipping away at your resistance, carving away the hard exterior shell you erected to keep him out, to reach the soft core.

Order - What are the rules you have to adhere to?

He doesn’t like to call them rules, since it just makes it seem like he is oppressive. Understandings? Manner? Either of them would be better words in his mind. At the root of everything, this mindset stems from the belief that you know what is proper and good. There are a few lines in the sand that he’ll point out, but for the most part he’ll assume you know what the laws of the land are.

If you don’t have something nice to say, then don’t say it at all. The exception to this rule is if you are verbally tearing down some miscreant. Else, you are to sugar, spice and everything nice towards him. Sassiness is welcomed though, but no in excessive amounts. He is the sort of person to casually say that he likes somebody with an attitude though that only goes as far as that you provide him with a challenge - he kind of likes the idea of "taming" a partner.

Don't talk smack about me to other people. This rule is partially because he cares a lot about how others perceive him and because he doesn't want somebody intervening. Besides, your actions reflect onto him and he doesn't want you to shine a bad light on him just because you can't get your act together when other people are around. He considers the low points of your relationship as something that should remain between the two of you.

I provide you with food and a roof over your head, so you listen to him. In some ways, he is downright paternalistic - this is only one of them. In any case, he earns more than you, pays when you eat out and the deal for house ownership has his signature on it. He is for equality insofar as it doesn't upset his position of power. So, it is his house and his rules and you are to treat him as your Lord and Saviour along with granting him all the privileges that come with such a position.

Don't try to get third parties involved in our stuff. Reflecting on one of the above rules here. That being said, what would really get his blood boiling would be if you involve some uppity politician in affairs that are between you and him. He is wary of his own politicians and the sentiment to foreign lawmakers is even worse, so if you get one of them on board then the blood sports will commence.

There are many more rules, spoken as well as unspoken, but we'll just leave it at that for now.

Rehabilitation - How much will they change you? Will they break you? How much therapy would you need in the event that you get rid of them?

He'll change you to fit the romanticised version of you that he has in his mind's eye and he wouldn’t shy away from more unsavoury means if he thinks they are necessary. In that sense, you might have to undergo severe therapy and deconstruct the mould he pressed you in and reconstruct your personality.

Or it could be that you bury your actual persona so deep in your subconscious, that you have moments of derealisation and have to slowly be coaxed out of the cocoon you wrapped yourself in. If you put up a pretty hefty fight, then he might even brainwash you in the truest sense of the word (putting you in a moment of existential distress and then forming you to his liking) and if that is the case, some deprogramming such as is necessary for ex-cult member might on the table.

Aside from that, you’ll need to learn how to be independent again, learn how to provide for yourself and put your own food on the table, how to think for yourself and not in the tight frame he imposed on you. Time far away in another country with differing cultural and moral framework might be helpful then.

And even after that, you'll be paranoid, it through constantly fearing being tracked via your phone or having somebody physically watching your every move. It will take a lot to calm you down and you would be in danger of resorting to drugs to ease your fear and emotional pain.

Zeal - Do they fall fast or slow? What is their reaction to their own feelings?

Alfred is inclined to take this relatively fast once he is sure of his feelings for you; it is the stage before that. At times, he can be really emotionally constipated, though not to the degree his father can be. It is just that he has so much on his plate and while he has a warm and pleasant exterior though it actually takes a bit before a real emotional connection is established. Even then, he would be careful to place his full trust in you. If anything, being trusted by him would only come after years of proving yourself and even then, he would still hold something over your head to "motivate" you to not double cross him.

As for how he reacts to his own feelings - he is as rash and impulsive as you probably assume he'll be. Being in love is a pleasure for him and he is prone to taking things too fast. Chances are that he'll be suffocating in his affections at first, if he can get away with it. Once he realises that his feelings run even deeper than mere infatuation, he might stop for a moment and conduct some introspection. Said introspection will seldom be self-critical, however, and is more to assess what might work with you and how far he wishes to go with you, rather than anything concerning ethics.

Art is not mine

#yandere hetalia #yandere x reader #yandere america #yandere character sheet #x reader #yandere

100 notes · View notes

sgiandubh · 2 months

Text

Holy Monday - Dagger Man

Sidenote: it's horrendously late, in my own time zone and Holy Monday is gone for good. Hoping yesterday's wonderful SC news are enough for you to forgive me, I go ahead with my short personal notes on what is perhaps one of the most complicated stories of this week.

Enter Judas Iscariot, whose name is perhaps a local corruption of the Latin term for 'dagger man': sicarius.

Who is he? We are told he was one of The Twelve chosen ones, but our Bibles are, to say the least, not very talkative when it comes to this man. We do not know what his merits are and many risk a seriously tragical confusion with the other Judas, 'son of James'. Perhaps in the same way Mary of Bethany is still mistaken by many for Mary Magdalene herself.

Today's episode is a throwback: 'Then Jesus six days before the passover came to Bethany, where Lazarus was, which had been dead, whom he raised from the dead' (John, 12:1)'

We don't know very well where the following episode happens (in Lazarus' house? somewhere else?) and for the first two days of the Holy Week, the Evangelists' reports are either vague or even conflicting. A woman named Mary approaches. Clearly, more than a sympathizer, yet barely tolerated by what clearly is a gender segregated assembly, where women serve a dinner they never join in. Something still very much happening in the Mediterranean world, by the way:

'Then took Mary a pound of ointment of spikenard, very costly, and anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped his feet with her hair: and the house was filled with the odour of the ointment. (John, 12:3)'

Is she a prostitute? A rich patron? I have always thought, perhaps wrongly, there was something very erotic in that choreography, for hair is a very strong sexual symbol and even more so in the Ancient World (think Egyptian wigs and also, heh, Samson). Something that also reminded me of Salome's fateful dance of the seven veils.

Experts have calculated, for dry amusement probably, the cost of that 'ointment' in today's money, which is disingenuous, to say the least. Nevertheless, that's easily the price tag of a brand new Mercedes, with all the bells and whistles. Judas immediately puts things into context and speaks like a corporate CFO: 'Why was not this ointment sold for three hundred pence, and given to the poor?' (John, 12:5)

You think this is what a good manager would do, right? Well, think twice. John does not like Judas. At all. He immediately tells us who he thinks that strange man really is: 'Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, which should betray him' (John, 12:4). And, which is perhaps even worse, a corrupted treasurer of sorts: 'not that he cared for the poor; but because he was a thief, and had the bag, and bare what was put therein' (John, 12:6).

Jesus' answer to this apparent practical dilemma is very clear: ' Let her alone (...), for the poor always ye have with you; but me ye have not always' (John, 12: 8-9). Judas' enormous mistake is to transform what obviously is a spiritual matter into a vulgar, political one. Throwing money into the mix, instrumentalizing it for what we would today call 'propaganda purposes' is at complete odds with His entire message.

But sometimes even the voice of Heaven has trouble making itself heard. This is why I have chosen for today a simple, short shofar sound, from Miklós Rózsa 's original soundtrack for Ben Hur:

youtube

#Holy Week #Easter 2024 #Youtube

31 notes · View notes

passerine-parable · 9 months

Text

Having just ran from the terrifying evangelists at my college campus, (not my proudest moment ahaha) I’m thinking about college evangelism in the silt verses world.

—————————-

Faiths toting their looming pet saints around the central square, chained on each side to cheerful young adults in matching colored t shirts who intermittently pull at them to keep them centered and on path, so that they do not break their chains and give chase. The saints moan softly, their many limbs and many towering faces teetering gently in the breeze like macabre parade floats

_______

Prophets offering tastes of their God’s power like free branded keychains at a booth near the duck pond. “Just hold my hand for a moment and watch your flesh bloom into something greater!”

They drop a crimson seed in your palm, and You scream in fear as bloody red roots grow down and bloody red leaves grow up.

Just as quickly as it grows it crumbles, and you are left with a cauterized scar in the shape of a thorn, itching and burning and glowing like an ember.

“See, see, that wasn’t so bad, grow with us Wednesdays at 3pm in the ecology building, room 104.”

They hand you a goodie bag and you move to the next booth.

——————

Posters printed with cheerful prayer marks in the library basement. Don’t look too close or your peripheral vision begins to twist and unfurl into dizzying fractals of light until all you can see is the poster itself.

“Community!” It reads. “Friends! Games! Free food! practice sacrifice on your peers to prepare for a successful future! See in colors unseen!”

In small text at the bottom it reads

*by reading the entirety of this poster you are contractually liable to be sacrificed at random by the SPEC (students of the prismatic eye community). Join our licensed faith today!

You tear your eyes away at last and blurrily check your schedule. Looks like Wednesdays at three are all clear.

#TSV #the silt verses #fanfic #rambling #street evangelists are terrifying #cw body horror #cw religion

51 notes · View notes

monstersdownthepath · 10 months

Text

Demigod Dossier: Oni Daimyo, part 1

(Pictured: Inma, Empress of the World, the greatest of the Daimyo)

Lawful, Neutral, and Chaotic Evil Incarnations of Debauchery and Depravity The Complete Book of the Damned, pg. 126~127

The Oni are an interesting bunch, to me. Each Oni begins its existence as a Kami, a spirit of the land directly created by the gods to preserve the world, as well as the relationship between nature and those with the power to change it (i.e. mankind). Any kami that fails to uphold the Laws of Golden Perfection, an esoteric series of laws no mortal being could hope to understand, becomes an outcast and is relieved of their duties once their replacement is crafted. Many kami simply fade into nonexistence, while some devolve into mindless nature spirits... but the majority of these disgraced stewards instead evolve into Oni, malicious spirit creatures that can form a physical body once they enter an area of mass death and tragedy.

Upon incarnating, all oni get to experience sensations for the first time. According to oni, their pathetic kami forms don’t feel, see, smell, or taste like their new flesh body does; everything is so much brighter, louder, tastier, more impactful once they have a physical form. So, naturally, oni completely devolve into pleasure-seeking hedonists hellbent on maximizing their exposure to every form of sensation they can get ahold of with the power they possess. Like the Rakshasa that some of them share an alignment with, the oni are intentionally a ‘less severe’ class of fiend a DM can sprinkle into their sessions with lower stakes; oni aren’t conquering worlds or destroying countries. Each one seeks their own satisfaction above anything else, so their villainous actions can be... varied. One may kidnap musicians because they wish to hear a song they wrote played by a professional, one may steal maidens of a specific holy order because their blood tastes the best, and one may level a city block because the buildings were blocking the sunlight shining through their favorite stained glass window. Destructive and scary, but not world-shaking.

The Oni Daimyo we’ll be looking at today are the end result of a very specific process that oni can go through: Oni view mortals as taking the wonders of the world for granted and enjoy punishing those who don’t go out of their way to enjoy what they can have and destroy what they cannot (i.e. anyone who isn’t an evil hedonist). They believe that the greatest pleasures only become so when they’re taken from another... and thus a Daimyo emerges from the horde when it realizes that “another” includes other oni. Browbeating their lesser kin into obedience, all Oni Daimyo acquire the power of a demigod by brute force, tyrannizing lesser oni into providing the ascending fiend with excess and experience until it ignites a divine spark within them. The three we’ll be looking at today are the ones that caught my eye among their small number...

Oni Daimyo work freely and happily with mortals, seeing them as toys, tools, or perhaps even partners and consorts. Whatever role they serve in a Daimyo’s court, those who devote themselves fully to the Daimyo’s ideals can access a cache of divine magic they can exploit. Worshipers receive Boons that are are relatively simple: a trio of spell-like abilities, each of which may be used 2/day. Boons are normally gained slowly, at levels 12, 16, and 20, however entering the Evangelist, Exalted, or Sentinel Prestige Classes can see the Boons gained as early as levels 10, 13, and 16.

Oni Daimyo come across the entire spectrum of Evil alignments, but they’re not demons, devils, or daemons, and thus the Demoniac, Diabolist, and Souldrinker classes are barred to them without DM fiat.

Inma, the Empress of the World Lawful Evil Daimyo of Lavish Wealth, Origami, and Servitude Domains: Community, Evil, Law, Nobility Subdomains: Family, Home, Leadership, Tyranny

Obedience: Craft delicate origami representing those you seek to rule over. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus on saving throws against mind-affecting effects.

Aw, how nice :) Inma is the most powerful of the Daimyo, so it’s ironic to me that she has one of the most peaceful Obedience rituals. Quite a few of the Daimyo, in fact, have rituals that can easily be hidden or passed off as a form of meditation, making it easy to hide your faith in the hedonistic fiends even under close observation. Who in their right mind is going to wonder if you’re evil for folding paper? I do appreciate that Inma doesn’t make you dramatically crush or burn or otherwise dispose of the folded figures, because it means you can unfold the origami and re-use the same sheets for your next Obedience. It’s a small thing, but I like when recycling your ritual materials is an option.

Unlike many Obedience rituals that can be quashed by being robbed or imprisoned, you can perform origami with just about any flat, flexible material of the appropriate size. In a pinch, you can tear cloth into strips and fold them as well. Again, it’s small, but I appreciate the flexibility and ritual resilience.

And the benefit? Incredible. Blanket +4 to saves against the biggest class of Save-or-Suck spells and effects in existence, making you that much harder to charm, Dominate, mislead, distress, and emotionally manipulate. A +4 to saves against ALL mind-affecting effects rather than a subset like compulsions is incredibly rare and should be appreciated for how many times it’ll probably save your life (and your party’s life) over the course of your adventuring career!

Boon 1: Create Treasure Map Boon 2: Charm Monster Boon 3: Extended Dominate Person

Create Treasure Map is a somewhat niche spell, but one I’m happy to have as a spell-like (especially since it ignores the 100gp component cost) rather than needing to use a precious spell slot or waste spells known to have available. It’s a little gruesome, requiring a portion of a slain creature to use--typically a stretch of skin or piece of its hide--but it creates a map between where you’re standing and up to 3 (+1 per 3 levels) caches of whatever that creature considers valuable, along with whatever features and dangers the creature remembers being on the way there. Don’t bother using this on animals and unintelligent beasts as all you’ll get is food stores or perhaps its nest (which, hey, if that’s your objective...), but on various bandits and baddies, you’ll be pointed right to their treasure caches (alongside whatever else they saw as worth remembering). The map even works on any scale, so whether the target’s treasure is 30 feet or 300 miles away, you’ll get your quest objective... just know that the wider a net you cast, the less reliable the map becomes. It notes hazards the creature remembers, but some may be too small to actually show up if the map covers enough territory.

The next two can be lumped together fairly easily, as both are excellent tools at 1/day, let alone the 2/day that your Daimyo grants! Charm Monster is an off-switch for a potentially painful encounter, making a temporary friend out of any monster you may meet on your journeys, which has as many applications as you can possibly imagine. With a duration of a day per level, you can more or less keep a creature (or even several creatures) permanently on your side, perhaps even long enough to convert them into a friend WITHOUT magic, as morally questionable as such a thing may be (but you are Evil, so...). Dominate Person isn’t as flexible when handling encounters as Charm Monster, as it only works on Humanoids and Monstrous Humanoids, but there’s a lot of Humanoids in the world, and two free castings of “gain an ally that will fight for you” that lasts for weeks on end and have no components so even people carefully watching you won’t know you’ve just turned their guards against them. Having the spell be Extended feels like overkill considering it also lasts for a day per level, but if you need to send your new thrall on an extended errand, it can be useful to have them in your pocket for four weeks instead of two. Between these two spells, castable twice each, you can amass an entourage in a shockingly short time... in fact, to preserve the DMs sanity, you may want to limit the Domination to just two creatures at a time!

------

Gyuku, the Sea Devil Chaotic Evil Daimyo of Piracy, Tea, and Tsunamis Domains: Chaos, Evil, Strength, Water Subdomains: Entropy, Fear, Ferocity, Oceans

Obedience: Perform a tea ceremony on the shore of an ocean or while blindfolded. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus on saving throws against water-based effects.

Another cute one! Despite Gyuku being one of the most violent of the Daimyo, her daily ritual is a meditation and centering ritual. There’s something ironic about a Chaotic Evil hedonist demanding her followers calmly make tea every day, but I suppose when you’re an Oni, you get really serious about how your food is prepared. I appreciate that in contrast to other oceanic demigods, she DOESN’T lock you to the shorelines like the others do, allowing you to practice your tea ceremony blindfolded if you can’t, for whatever reason, access the sea. Regardless of the alignment of your allies, few will see anything off about you performing such a small ritual every day, allowing you to masquerade as Good, or at least hide your faith from investigators and guards...

It’s an Obedience with no listed cost, but you’re still not likely to perform it if your belongings get pilfered, but you don’t even need a particularly expensive set. Even just a cup of hot water and a single bag of tea will allow you to do something to please your Daimyo enough to get your power for the day... especially if granting you your power would let you wreak havoc on the people who stole from you in the first place.

The benefit is, in stark contrast to the first of the Daimyo, underwhelming. Water-based attacks and spells are few and far between, and most of them are more of an than an inconvenience than something you really need to worry about. In many cases, this just reads “+4 to saves versus being knocked prone,” but there’s nevertheless a decent few Adventure Paths (yes, Reign of Winter; many Cold spells also have the Water descriptor!) where this ability would come in handy... outside of those, though, this benefit is sub-par.

Boon 1: Slipstream Boon 2: Control Water Boon 3: Heroes’ Feast

Alright, cute. Slipstream isn’t an especially useful spell, sitting in the pile of “spells I would never prepare but find inoffensive to have for niche scenarios.” It lasts well over an hour when you first get it and goes up by 10 minutes/level from there, but all it functionally does is add +10ft to the target’s walking speed. Nothing special, but I’m sure the Heavy Armor Enjoyers in the party will appreciate being able to walk at normal human speed for a few hours a day, with the amusing option of getting an extra +10 on top of that if they so happen to be traveling downhill. The real usefulness of the spell is the +20ft to the target’s swim speed, letting them travel with decent swiftness underwater; if they don’t already have a swim speed, they gain one! Unfortunately they don’t get any ability to breathe underwater, but since even weedy little nerd Wizards can hold their breath for over a minute at a time (provided they didn’t dump Con (don’t do this)), it’s not much of an impediment if you just need to dive down and then back up. Think of it like a ‘swim underwater’ spell that has an added bonus once you’re no longer IN the water! That at least makes it less disappointing.

Unlike the next spell, which has a myriad uses. Control Water allows you to create whirlpools, stop floods, create floods, shape water pillars, and generally screw with the depth and shape of enormous patches of water for hours at a time, making you the bane of ships, which is perfect for a follower of a goddess of piracy! Whether it’s trapping victims to make them easy pickings, raising pillars behind you to block off enemies, flooding dockside towns, or slamming Water Elementals and the like with a nigh-permanent Slow, your crew will no doubt appreciate your control over water (though everyone else will likely be a little unenthused), In other scenarios I’m afraid it’s not as useful, but I’m sure there’s plenty of moments when draining enormous amounts of water from a room or causing even more water to flood out of a specific receptacle would solve a puzzle that’s otherwise halting your party. I do appreciate that Control Water also specifies it can be used “on similar liquid,” though what is similar to water and thus what can be affected by the spell is left up to the DM to decide.

Control Water offers utility to a scurvy dog and the mangy crew, but Heroes’ Feast offers to cure that scurvy and provide the most important resource a captain must be aware of: Morale and loyalty. There’s little that can keep a pirate crew happy like being allowed to eat a Heroes’ Feast every single day, once at breakfast and once again at dinner, and you’re able to whip up a meal for up to 16 people per casting when you first get this ability, which covers yourself, the ships’ officers, and some extra crewmates you’ve grown to like or who you believe deserve the honor. As one of my favorite spells I’ll sing the praises of the Feast every chance I get, and while it may be underwhelming in terms of spells that make you a better pirate, having it available twice a day will, if nothing else, assure sickness, poison, and starvation are no longer a concern on the seas, AND make you beloved by everyone who regularly partakes... and should they get too used to your food, to the point of relying on its availability and not stocking up on their own rations... well, it’d be awful unfortunate if your ‘allies’ didn’t pay for the privilege to continue feasting.

------

Nataka, the Red King Neutral Evil Daimyo of Drought, Perfume, and Forest Fires Domains: Destruction, Evil, Fire, Weather Subdomains: Arson, Catastrophe, Seasons, Smoke

Obedience: Meditate within a ring of fire while periodically casting incense into the flames. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus on saves against fire effects.

All three of the Daimyo that caught my attention have a similar theme to their Obedience ritual: It’s simple, easily disguised as a Neutral or Good act, and has no listed cost requirements. Even in this case, the ritual is easily waved off as a ritual to Sarenrae or any other number of benevolent sun gods. After all, like with Inma’s peaceful origami and Gyuku’s lovely tea party, who’s going to suspect you’re serving an evil spirit just because you want to smell nice? The only real problems I can envision are if you’re in an environment where creating a ring of fire is dangerous to the surrounds (in a dry, flammable area) or for you (such as in an enclosed space), though if you’re recklessly Evil you may not care about the former.

There’s not much more to say about it except that you’ll need to stock up with a lot of incense each time you’re in civilization (or learn to craft it yourself!), because you’ll quickly burn (badum-tiss) through your supply even if you’re being conservative with it. The +4 to saves versus fire effects is a very common benefit for Obedience rituals, but it’s always welcome because fire effects themselves are common at every level. From dodging Fireball to ducking beneath a dragon’s breath weapon, it’s boring but it’s likely to be useful for your entire adventuring career.

Boon 1: Flame Blade Boon 2: Extended Cup of Dust Boon 3: Maximized Fireball

Flame Blade isn’t a spell we’ve seen as a Boon before, so here’s the rundown: For 1 min/level, you conjure a scimitar of fire that you can attack with like a normal weapon. It deals 1d8 Fire damage, +1 per 2 HD you have (max +10). Importantly, it resolves as a melee touch attack and, since the Sentinel is an option to gaining the Boons early, it’s your absolute best bet for following Nataka for two reasons: 1) maximum BAB, allowing for iterative attacks with your flaming weapon, and 2) Scimitars are your Daimyo’s sacred weapon, allowing the Sentinel’s Symbolic Weapon ability (+1 to attack and damage rolls per 3 Sentinel levels) to work with the spell! Even if you don’t go into Sentinel, it also benefits from the Warpriest’s Sacred Weapon ability... though it won’t surpass the spell’s base damage until level 10, so that’s more of a later-game thing. Though the list of creatures with Fire Resistance or immunity is long, the creatures without either is just as lengthy, as is the list of creatures who take extra damage or debuffs from Fire. The duration of 1 min/level means it may even last multiple combats, giving you 2 or 3 (or more!) fights where you’re hitting a target’s touch AC, though be warned that the blade is made of pure fire and its damage is thus unaffected by your ability score modifiers. It’s a small but important tradeoff if you rely on high modifiers for their base damage.

Compared to Flame Blade, Extended Cup of Dust feels a little silly. The spell already lasts an eternity, so doubling its duration feels unneeded, as does being able to use it twice a day. If you want someone dead, just hit them four times a round with your sword. This is for making someone suffer, and suffer for a long time. I can see casting it on a fleeing adversary to make their life in the coming days as miserable as possible, but otherwise its only real use is tormenting NPCs or extorting creatures with low saves. Using it on a creature whose power is fueled by their ability to drink something is especially hysterical, but such opportunities will be few and far between.

Which brings us to... Maximized Fireball. There’s not much to say here that hasn’t already been said about the spell that’s a permanent part of the spell list of every Sorcerer and Wizard from level 5 onward. All Maximized does is assure you’re always getting 60 Fire damage in a 20ft radius explosion. 60 flat damage (30 if the enemy succeeds their save). twice a day. There’s better Boons out there, but against anything not immune to Fire, especially clusters of enemies, you’ll be hard pressed to find them.

#Demigod Dossier #Spiritual Spotlight #Sinister Spotlight #Pathfinder

57 notes · View notes