#the finale was amazing i loved it so much and ugly cried until i couldn't breathe | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lluzionz · 1 year

Note

hii can i request diluc finding out reader is anorexic feel free to ignore :)

Hello there dear anon. I really really hope that you just came up with the idea and not are anorexic yourself or someone you know. If that's the case, I am really sorry you had to go through something like this (or if is someone you know) but remember, you body is amazing no matter the size it is. Just like you. I love you so much you amazing, beautiful person <3

"Body size"

Diluc x gn!reader

Tw: anorexia, comfort

A/n: Apologes to the person who sent this request, it literaly took so long and it's kinda all over the place..

"You are fat" Was the three words that your refflection screamed at you every time you looked at yourself in the mirror. "You are fat, stop eating." The voice in your mind scolded you everytime you tried to eat anything and you listened, you stopped eating.

At first it wasn't that bad, just eating a little less than usual, avoiding sweets and fast food but as the time past by the amont of food you ate was less and less until it was nothing. "I'm hungry but I don't want to eat anything because I'll get fat again." You reminded yourself whenever your mind drifted off to dreamland, or rather, the food you used to enjoy a while back. "I have to change and that's final." That thought kept you going even when your felt like passing out from starving yourself.

"Aren't you going to eat your food?" Diluc's voice brought you back to reality as you turned your head to look at him. "I'm not really hungry." You replied as you gently pushed your plate from in front of you. "Besides, I'm on a diet. I need to loose some weight." You continued as Diluc put his spoon down and looked at you, taking your hand in his. "Y/N, I've noticed that lately you had been loosing a great amount of weight." He started and you felt your breath caughting on your throat as the words left his mouth. "I'm not asking you to tell me why do you want to loose weight. All I want you to do is to remember to not overdo it and to take good care of yourself and to me, you are perfect just the way you are."

A faint smile rested on his lips as he rested his hand on your cheek, giving it a little stroke with his thumb. You smiled back at him, feeling your heart breaking into pieces as his words settled in. Not overdo it? Take good care of yourself and to him you were perfect? Was he serious or he was just lying to make you feel better? You had no idea and this made you feel ever worse. What if he was with you only because he felt bad for you? What if he didn't actually liked you? All of this overthinking made you feel even worse so you removed his hand from your face and got up from your seat. "Are you ok my love?" He asked as he watched you walking away. "I'm just tired and I want to get some sleep." You tried to smile but nothing came out.

With slow, unsteady steps, you walked towards your shared bedroom and an layed down on the bed. You didn't even had the strength to chanfe your clothes. Your body was pretty weak and extremely skinny to the point were your bones had started showing. It was that bad. You didn't even let Diluc touch you let alone hug you anymore and you felt horrible about it but there was nothing you could do about it. You just couldn't let him see the things you were doing to yourself. "He would be so disappointed in me." Tears were rolling down your cheeks as you cried yourself to sleep.

Time passed by and things were only getting worse and worse. Diluc tried so many times to ask you what was bothering you but you never gave him a clear answer. "Oh I'm just tired" or "I didn't sleep well last night" or "I'm just not in the mood" was some of the excuses you used to cover up the damage you were doing to yourself, both mentally but mostly psychically. You were anorexic, even tho you had no idea that you were doing it because everytime you looked at yourself in the mirror, a fat ugly refflection of yourself stared back at you from the the other side of the mirror. It was awful but there was nothing you could do about it rather than keep going until you change, you become pretty.

"Y/N please, eat your food." Diluc begged you but your answer was the same. "I already ate." It was a lie, obviously, but you needed to lie to him in order to get him off your back. "I know you're lying..." He said in a low, almost like a whisper voice but you were still able to hear it. "I'm not lying." You stoop up abruptly from your seat which caused you to feel extremely dizzy and stumble back. "What's wrong?" He asked you as he managed to grab you before you could hit the hard ground. "Nothing, I'm j-just feeling dizzy all of a sudden..." Your voice trailed off as your eyes closed slowly, the last thing you remembered seeing was Diluc hovering over you, calling out your name, trying to wake you up.

Your eyes opened slowly and you looked around you, trying to undrestand where were you. You were in an unfamiliar room, machines were biping around you as you tried to get up from the bed you were laying to. "Relax Y/N. Don't move." Diluc's soft voice echoid throught the unfamiliar room as you turned to look at him. "W-where am I?" You asked as he took your hand in his, camling you down a bit. "You're in the hospital, you fainted in my arms." He said and flashes of last nights events rushed back to your mind. "I remember now but, why am I here?" You asked but Diluc didn't reply to you immidiately. He firstly took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down before talking again. "As I held your fainted body in my arms, l realised that you had lost a great amont of weight, to the point were your bones are showing. I got extremely worried and rushed you to the hospital, where I found out that you are suffering from anorexia..." His voice caught on his throat as he tried to hide the lump on his throat.

You stayed silent. Your mind was completely empty. You knew you were harming yourself by not eating anything for a while now but you never realised how much damage you were actually doing and you ended up having anorexia. "I have anorexia..." Tears started falling from your eyes as you repeated the words over and over again, trying to accept reality but you couldn't. It was too hard. "I just want to ask you ome thing, why?" Diluc gathered your attention back to him as you wiped your tears away and turned to fully face him ansd then the truth came out. "I'm fat and so ugly and I wanted to change myself in order to become pretty." You said without taking a breath, just letting all your thoughts and feelings out as Diluc just sat there, listening to you talking.

When you were finally done comfessing to him all the lies you told him ever since this whole mess started. "Y/N, you know this isn't true. You are neither fat or ugly. You are just an amazing, beautiful person who sadly lacks the confidence and has low self esteem." His words hit you like a tone of bricks but he was absolutely right. Your low self esteem and lack of confidence had brought you to this, laying on a hospital bed and hocked up in machines, trying to correct your mistakes. "I'm sorry Diluc. I'm so sorry for being anorexic, lying to you and having you worrying about me." You tried to hold back your tears but it was impossible as they ran down your cheeks once again. "No no Y/N don't apologise to me. I'm the one who needs an apology but yourself is." He was quivk to correct you. "You tortured yourself for so long, trying to change and become "prettier" as you put it, only to end up in a hospital. Why? You are a beautiful person Y/N, inside and out without even trying but you sadly can't see that, your true beauty." He said, making you cry harder.

"You only see yourself as what you think it is and not for what it truly is and this makes me so sad because you can't see what I'm seeing, that beautiful person I fell in love with and will continue to love for the rest of my life." He said as he slowly got up from his seanmt and walked up to you, gently wrapping his arms around your skinny body hugging you close to him as you cried. "It's okay Y/N. Everything will be alright. I am here for you." He said as his hand run circles on your back in an attempt to comfort you. It worked as you slowly stopped crying and raised your head up to look at your lover. He looked down at you and smiled, bringing his hand up to wipe your tear stained cheeks. "I will be here for you and we will get through this together. Your pain and sadness are mine too so let me help you recover and be happy because, I can't afford to loose you. I love you so much and I can't imagine living in a world without you." Uppon hearing his words, smile made it's way across your lips as you hugged him as tightly as you could, using that small amount of strength that was left in your body. "I love you too Diluc."

#diluc x reader #diluc x y/n #diluc x you #diluc comfort #genshin diluc #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin scenarios #genshin fanfic #genshin comfort

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jocy-diaries · 2 years

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06.22.2022

I almost had a panic attack today because the makeup I bought for 20 bucks was too dark. If anything goes wrong today consider me dead. I know it's just anxiety about leaving. I know it is. But that doesn't make it better.

Okay finding the train as a pain, bit I expected that so it's fine. But I should have taken a first class ticket. Why in the hell didn't I take a first class ticket??? Like this is fine, but it could have been better... Goddam. I did find some nice Americans also traveling as a group though, so good for them~

All of my pictures are going to have a weird ugly film to them now, I should have taken first class what is WRONG with me?? 😭 I know that while purchasing the tickets I was anxious and just wanted to get it done but goddammit. And I ALWAYS do this. I Always take the lower class for myself. Fucking WHYYYYYY.

And since I am now realizing I didn't get first class tickets, I now know that I won't have the food cart coming to me with snacks and coffee. For seven hours. That cart was meant to be my salvation 😢

Okay so I've upgraded ALL of my other tickets to make sure they're first class now haha. I don't think I would have done that if I hadn't gone through this so you know, looking at the positives. It rained while I was in the train~ That was my first European rain!

Ohmygosh~♡♡ Our train kinda broke down so we had to go to a different one. And it's so much better~~~ ^3^ I love my goddess so much this is such an amazing piece of luck~ And I met the nice Americans again! Will with the tattoos, Drew with the watch and sunglasses, Gabby with the straight hair, and. ... one more lovely lady with curly hair. They were very nice! I hope they have a good time in Florence.

So, I missed my train. I couldn't understand that I would need to move to another metro station first, the intermediary steps weren't clear to me, so I missed my train. And at first someone helped me get a ticket but then they were about to sell me a bad SIM cars since i didn't have internet and i couldn't call anyone but then this goddamn angel of a person came to help me, and we searched around so many fully booked hotels for like an hour and we finally found something and I was so scared. I couldn't understand anything in Italian, why did I ever think this was a good idea. I am so grateful for the guy that helped me, I would not have been able to do anything without his helped. It never dawned on me how Useless I am at everything. If I didn't have money and a goddess who loved me then what the fuck would have happened. I don't think I've cried like this out of distress and self pity in, forever. I'm I'm scared and I'm so grateful and I miss my family so much. This doesn't feel like a good idea anymore. It is all my fault though. I don't understand why I couldn't just do things correctly. And one thing that makes it all a wee bit harder is that I can't very well let my parents know how much I freaked out. I can't let anyone other than myself know that I'm crying in distress right now, and when asked about it it has to become a light hearted joke rather than a stressful ordeal. It's so lonely living that way.

It's a good thing I ate breakfast today. I haven't had anything else to eat. Come to think of it. Everything was going fine until I decided to speak with the one guy and I don't want to speak to anymore. That's literally when it all went downhill. I need to end this. It's either end this or cure him and I don't know if I have the heart to be kind right now. Eventhough my angel was... I'll sleep on it.

#dear diary #june 2022 #06.22.2022 #italy 2022 #milan #travel

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moefongo · 2 years

Note

I see requests are open so may ask for all the villains + robbie with an s/o who likes giving them rocks and sea shells and bones and shiny stuff and whatever else they find?

I keep giving people pretty rocks that reminde me of them lol

Hell yes! kjkldajdfpjf crow vibes I love it! Also sorry if these are a bit short, I am trying to get back into the flow of writing

Zant

He's mildly confused at first but in a good way because he didn't expect it. Like he'd have no words to express how he feels, in all honesty, Zant feels like he fell in love with them all over again.

He treasures them all, because he never imagined that his S/O cared about him so much to bring him trinkets from every place they went.

In fact he keeps them in a little chest so he never loses them, and when his S/O is away for what ever reason, he carries the little chest with him everywhere and even sleeps with it just to feel that they are there with him.

Ghirahim

When his S/O gives him the first shiny rock, he cries because he can't believe his S/O thinks about him all the time. I mean he spends more than an hour crying and rambling to them how honored and loved he feels.

Since he loves each and every one of their gifts that he makes them into wonderful pieces of jewelry so he can proudly show off his beloved gifts. In fact, the first one he got he turned it into a necklace which he wears to battle as a good luck charm.

Honestly Ghirahim would stop wearing any other type of jewelry since those hold sentimental value to him. And in proper Ghirahim fashion, he's brag about it too, he's probably like "Oh your partner got you a diamond ring? That's cute, but mine gave me a shiny rock from a pond that they thought I'd like. So yeah, tell them to step up their game honey because yours couldn't compare."

Ganondorf

He's flattered and like Zant he's at a loss for words. Ganondorf can't quite explain the warmth in his heart when his S/O presents the very first gift, a sand dollar they thought he would like. And despite the many presents they give him that warm feeling comes back every time they give him something.

He can't help but every time they give him something he envelops them in a gentle hug and kisses them on their forehead, thanking them for such a thoughtful present.

Ganondorf can't help but wonder how did he manage to be with someone as kind and wonderful as them. His love for them is immense and honestly he can't ask for more.

Volga

Fun fact for them its a mutual thing, because Volga also gets them things that remind him of them. But when they give him rocks, shells etc. he keeps them in his private stash which is hidden away somewhere only him and his S/O know.

Volga might even go to where his secret stash is at random moments, just to hold and observe each of the presents his S/O gave him. He'll be there all alone with a huge grin on his face thinking back on the day and the look on his S/O's face.

After thinking for a bit he might just go get them another gift, which might be a something he stole or a cool shiny piece of metal.

Wizzro

He feels like he doesn't deserve such attention from his S/O, he thanks them and accepts their gifts but it'll get his mind running for a good while. So he just takes the button his S/O gave him and goes somewhere all alone to letting his mind overthink it.

After thinking long enough he goes and thanks them again and goes on a tangent on how amazing they are and how much he loves them and Wizzro will end up cry . He just has so many emotions going on that he just doesn't cry, he's ugly crying while hugging his S/O

In the end he calms down and goes to commit some arson to return the gesture.

Astor

He's very confused, he doesn't understand why his S/O would bring him random trinkets and buttons that matched the colors of his robe. They never bothered to tell him why either since he accepted them and never asked why. Until his collection started grow he finally asked them why they brought him so many of those. He didn't even mean to hurt their feelings, he was genuinely curious but his S/O misunderstood it since they thought he didn't like the gifts.

The look on his S/O's face was more than enough for Astor to realize that they were upset. He was devastated to see them apologize for getting him gifts that they they think he'd like. Astor immediately goes in to comfort and hug them while apologizing. After a bit of talking and cuddling they came to the conclusion that it was a big misunderstanding.

In the end his S/O kept on bringing him trinkets. As for Astor, he developed the habit of choosing 4 trinkets and putting them in his pockets. When he misses his S/O he pulls them out and it makes him feel like they're with him.

Robbie

He loves all of their gifts, Robbie has catalogued and placed in a room specially prepped to display his magnificent collection of trinkets.

Eventually that room turned into his study. When he's particularly bummed about his work he goes there to think and probably just look at his marvelous collection.

Also brings his S/O there to cuddle and talk about all of the gifts and their adventures on getting them. He loves to hear their stories and honestly he loves them even more.

Kohga

Kohga now deems them sacred Yiga relics and nobody questions it, they all accept it. All of the gifts are closely guarded for safe keeping.

His favorites are a banana pin they stole from some kid's backpack and a set of banana stickers they also stole from another kid. The stickers are also scented so you can imagine the uproar in the hideout when Kohga presented them as the banana stickers of wisdom and fortune, every Yiga member was dying to sniff the stickers, hence why the gifts are so closely guarded.

But aside from that, what Kohga values the most is how his S/O goes out of their way to get things that make them think of him and how they are willing to steal things from children.

Sooga

They usually get him stones and semi precious stones like opals and quartz, sometimes even the whole geode. He really values the lengths and efforts they go to find these gifts, though Sooga sometimes worries about them getting injured or lost trying to find another one.

So Sooga follows them in secret so he can make sure nothing happens to them and if they do have any sort of trouble. If it were to happen that he mysteriously showed up, he'd just say he was near the area on a mission.

Despite this, Sooga can't really stop them so he just thanks them and gently reminds them to be careful when they set off in their next adventure.

#legend of zelda #hyrule warriors #hw age of calamity #zant #ghirahim #ganondorf #volga #wizzro #astor #robbie #kohga #sooga #aoc astor #hw volga

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tyongxnct · 3 years

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𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 - 𝘛𝘦𝘯

pairing: Ten x reader

summary: Your best friend finally became your boyfriend, but not longer after that, he got a once in a lifetime opportunity. Ten didn’t know If he should take the offer, you only started dating recently but you would never hold him back. Going to a dance school in New York City? You know how much Ten loves dancing and you also know that you could make this work. But after a couple months, your relationship was slowly falling apart.

song: Pillow - Bebe Rexha

genre: bestfriends-to-lovers!au, long-distance!au, angst, smut, fluff

warnings: smut (that’s it i guess)

word count: 5.6k

A/N: I’ll probably take a song fic break after this one! I hope you enjoy this!! have fun reading :)

taglist: @aesthetichrj, @bitchenderyy, @bvbyxuxi, @chitaphrrrr

this is fiction!

I just wanna kiss your face I just wanna feel your gaze I just wanna, I just wanna I just wanna be where you are I just wanna feel your touch I'm not asking for too much I just wanna, I just wanna I just wanna wake up where you are

You missed the way he kissed you. You missed the way he looked at you with so much adoration, you missed his touch on your skin.

You missed him, you missed Ten.

“I miss you.” You whispered, half asleep. You were facetiming Ten and it’s been almost two months since he left.

“I miss you more.” Ten smiled as he watched you slowly fall asleep.

“That’s not possible.”

Ten looked at you with those eyes again.

“What?”

“Nothing. You’re just so pretty.”

“Shut up.” You said shyly.

“But it’s the truth.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more.” And then you fell asleep. That was your routine. Facetime with Ten until you fell asleep.

Yes, you missed him and you would prefer to sleep next to him, but Ten was living his dream and his happiness was your happiness.

I used to think that love was just so easy But I couldn't be less right Yeah I finally found someone perfect, just for me Gotta fly thousands of miles, yeah

four months ago

“Why? Please tell me, why is it so hard to find the perfect guy? Is there not a single guy who’s interested in me? Am I going to die alone? Am I too ugly to be loved?” you cried out.

Ten sighed. He wanted to tell you so bad that you were the prettiest girl in the entire world and that he would love you forever, but he was just you’re best friend. You didn’t like him like that. Right?

“No you’re not, now shut up and focus on new girl.”

“Is it too much I’m asking for? I just want someone to love me. Like really love me. Am I not loveable?” you asked him.

You looked at the screen and watched Nick and Jess share their first (and absolutely amazing and passionate) kiss.

“I want what they have! Look at the way he kisses her! I want that, I need that!”

After watching a couple more episodes of new girl, Ten decided to go home. He wanted to kiss you so bad, he imagined it the whole time instead of focusing on new girl. “You can stay the night if you want to.” You told him.

“Nah, I should go home. Lucas texted me and asked me to take Bella out since he’s busy with whatever her name was.”

“Fine. Text me when you get home.” You hugged your best friend goodbye before he left and he hugged you back, a little longer than normal. You were standing in front of the door and just hugged each other.

A couple minutes later he left and you missed his touch.

With a sad sigh you closed the door and went to the kitchen. You wanted to drink something, but suddenly the doorbell rang.

“Did you forget-“

You opened the door and saw Ten standing there and before you could finish your question, Ten pressed his lips on yours to shut you up. You didn’t move at first, your head was spinning, you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or just the fact that Ten, you’re best friend who you secretly loved more than anything else on this planet, kissed you with so much passion.

You pulled him closer as you put your arms around his neck. You were kissing him back and you accidently let out a moan when he put his tongue inside your mouth. You were never, ever kissed like this.

He softly pulled away to let you breathe again. Ten licked over his lips and stepped back.

“You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. You’re absolutely beautiful and I couldn’t stop myself from kissing you. I-I’m sorry If I just destroyed our friendship, but I need you to know how I feel about you. I don’t want you to date random men, I don’t want you to think that you are not enough, because fuck, you are. You are perfect and I want to love you like you deserved to be loved. If you let me.”

You looked at him with teary eyes. Ten, your best friend who you were crushing on for years, your best friend who helped you find cute outfits for your dates, even though he hated every second of you looking cute for another guy, your best friend who just confessed to you.

“I love you.” You blurred out.

Ten’s eyes widened.

“Shit, did I say it too soon?” you looked down to your feet.

“Fuck I love you too.” And without hesitation he pulled you closer to kiss you again, “I love you so much.” He said in between kisses.

That’s how your relationship started. He stayed the night and told Lucas to take care of Bella himself. He wanted to spend some time with his best- no, his girlfriend.

You were dating for three months now, and you can’t remember a time you were happier. You loved to go on dates with Ten, but you also loved the nights you had just dance battles at home. Ten always won, he was a dancer after all. Dancing was his passion, he loved it and he was the greatest dancer you’ve ever seen and when he told you about the school he wanted to apply to, you encouraged him to do it. One day, he got an email, but he was too scared to read it so he rushed over to your apartment.

“It’s going to be fine.” You assured him.

“C-Can you read it? Please?”

You smiled softly, “Sure.”

You opened the email and read it out loud, “Dear Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul, I would like to congratulate you for winning a scholarship in our school-“

“Oh my god I’m in?” he couldn’t believe it.

“You are in! I knew you would make it!” you hugged him tightly and he hugged you back even tighter after he realized that he had to leave you.

“I can’t believe this.” He mumbled into your neck.

“I can! You deserve this so much, I’m so proud of you Ten.” You pressed a kiss on his shoulder before you pulled back to look him in the eyes. “I love you.”

“I love you too. So much.” He said sadly.

“What’s wrong. Why are you not smiling and dancing?” you smiled softly.

“I-It’s in New York. I don’t want to leave you, maybe I should refuse-” He said unsure but you interrupted him.

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence. Ten, Baby, I love you and I promise you that everything is going to be fine. You worked so hard, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity, I’ll love you no matter where you are. We can make this work.”

You tried to stop yourself from crying so bad, you bit your lip almost too painfully.

“You are right. We’ll make this work. Thank you for believing in me.” He kissed every inch of your face, “You are the best girlfriend in this entire world. I love you so much.”

It took you so long to finally be with Ten and now you had a long-distance relationship. But your love was so strong, you could make this work. You promised each other to make this work.

I'll be alright, just one more night I'll be just fine, holdin' my pillow Pretending it's you though I'll be alright, just one more night I'll be just fine, holdin' my pillow Pretending it's you though

Babe 03:23: Sorry baby, we practiced a little longer than usual. You’re probably sleeping right now, sweet dreams. I love you and I’ll call you tomorrow. I promise.

You were actually still awake, you couldn’t fall asleep. You were worried and you missed him so much that you had to wait for an answer.

You threw the pillow you were hugging against the wall and sat up. You took your phone in your hand and smiled brightly as you called him on facetime. It’s been two minutes since he called, why did it take him so long to answer? You called him again and when he didn’t answer you texted him a simple good night and I love you.

You grabbed your pillow again and hugged it tightly. You tried to stop yourself from crying, but it was so hard. It’s been 7 months since Ten left, and the first couple months of your long-distance relationship was easy, you talked every day and texted often too, you would facetime before you would go to sleep and he would send you random pictures and videos of New York and his dance school so you would know about his lifestyle there.

But now he’s been pretty busy and you would talk maybe three times a week if he had time. He would answer your texts when you were asleep or not at all. Sometimes you were worried that he was overworking himself, but he assured you that everything was chill and easy. So why was he acting so distant?

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day, you told yourself as you tried to fall asleep. You would try to call him tomorrow and tell him that you were sad and that you missed him. Communication is the key after all, but for now, you’d cry into your pillow and imagine it was Ten you were hugging.

I need a minute to breathe you in Just a second to taste your skin I just gotta, I just gotta Feel you here right next to me Can we please just go back in time Those lazy Sundays, you and I 'Cause every hour and every day Is more painful when you're away

It was the last night before Ten would leave for New York. You spend the last month everyday together, it was almost like he moved in with you, but you pushed back that thought to stop your heart from hurting.

“Is it tasty?” you asked him.

You had ordered some Pizza and he asked you if you wanted a piece. You refused at first but now you wanted some and he laughed at your cute acting and gave you his last two pieces. “No it’s too much.” You giggled. “Just eat it, we both know that you could finish another box of Pizza baby.”

“Well, that’s true.”

He put his head on your lap while you were eating the last piece of Pizza. “You look so hot from here eating that Pizza. Tomato sauce on your lips, wow, baby, I get hard just looking at you from here.” He joked and you slapped him softly.

“Don’t make fun of me or you can sleep on the floor.”

Ten pouted, “You wouldn’t do that.”

You spent the next hours just laying lazily on your couch and cuddling. You would miss nights like these the most, just being with him and talking about everything that came to your minds. You loved it and you loved him.

You didn’t notice him crawl between your legs as you laid against the armrest. “What do you think? Should we take this off?” he pulled on your shirt.

“Maybe we should.” You smirked, “And maybe you should take your shirt off too.”

And he did. He took off his shirt first before he slowly, teasingly took off yours. You were just wearing a shirt and panties and now you were almost completely naked under him. “You’re so hot.” You heard him say before he started kissing your boobs. His hand softly caressed your pussy over your panties.

Your nipples hardened instantly, your head fell back and you just enjoyed his tongue on your breasts. “It feels so good.” You moaned.

After giving enough attention to your other nipple, Ten stood up and carried you to your bedroom. “It’s going to be a long night.” He smirked at you.

After softly placing you on the bed, Ten pulled down your panties and kissed your inner thighs. He kissed his was to your already wet pussy and kissed it softly. You felt his tongue against your clit and you closed your eyes. He licked you so good and sucked on your clit, you were so close.

“Fuck, baby, It feels so fucking good.”

Ten fastened his pace and a couple seconds later you reached your first orgasm.

“Number one, more to go.” He said, his chin glistening with your arousal and turning you on.

You felt his fingers on your entrance and a second later he thrusted his fingers inside of you. His lips were on your nipples again and you gripped the sheets, his fingers slid in easily, you were so wet. “Fuck.” You could feel your second orgasm coming. “Tell me baby, what do you want?”

“I want to cum again- please Ten make me cum again.” You cried out.

You felt him go faster and when he hit that one spot, you reached your second orgasm. Ten put his fingers against your lips, “Suck.” He demanded and you sucked his fingers clean. “Good girl.”

“I want to suck you off- please Ten let me suck you off.” You begged him.

“Okay baby, show me how good you can take me inside of your mouth.” He pulled down his sweatpants and his boxers briefs and sat down on the edge of your bed. You got off the bed and got on your knees right in front of his hard cock.

You spat on your hand and wrapped your fingers around his shaft and started pumping slowly, “Don’t tease baby, or you’ll regret it.” He warned you.

You fastened your pace and started licking his tip. You licked on the slit, and slowly put his cock inside of your mouth. It’s not your first time sucking his cock, you knew what you had to do to make him feel good.

“Yeah just like that, feels so good baby.” He caressed your hair softly as you took him all the way down. His cock hit the back of your throat but you didn’t mind, you liked it actually and Ten loved it. “Fuck yes yes, just like that, love it so much.” He moaned out, you felt him twitch inside of your mouth.

You sucked his cock and softly played with his balls, you looked up and saw that he closed his eyes and bit his lip, eyebrows furrowed and face sweaty. You let out a moan after seeing him like that and the vibrations of your voice felt so good, he came. “Fuck, yes baby take it all and swallow.”

You did as he said, “Open up and show me.”

You opened your mouth and sticked your tongue out. “Good girl. Now baby, I want you to fucking ride me, okay baby?”

You nodded eagerly.

You sat down on his cock slowly and started riding him. It felt so good, you grabbed his shoulders to go faster. “T-Ten, I love your cock so much.” You cried out. Ten cupped your boobs and flicked your nipples, and you loved it when he played with your nipples. Ten wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you down so he could suck on your nipples. While he did that, he fucked up into you, meeting your hips. The sounds of your skin slapping against each other was like music to your ears.

“So fucking tight, didn’t I fuck this pussy enough?” you clenched at his words.

You felt your legs arching and you felt like you were collapse on top of him, “T-Ten I can’t p-please take over.” And he did.

Within a second he turned your around and took you from behind. You were on all fours as he stared ramming his cock inside of you. His hand found your clit and he started rubbing and circling it with his fingers. “Gonna cum baby? Hm? Cum all over my cock?”

“Y-Yes, fuck, feel so good. I’m so fucking close.”

You clenched once again and encouraged Ten to go even faster and harder with his thrusts. “I’m gonna fill you up, you’re going to take all of my cum, okay baby?”

“Yes please, cum in me.”

And with the next thrust, you came. You moaned as you clenched and rode out your third orgasm, you were so sensitive but it still felt good. You clenched around him once again and Ten came and painted your walls white.

“Fuck fuck fuck.” He moaned as he slowed down and pulled his cock out of you. He watched his cum mixed with yours drip out of you. “So fucking hot.” He got hard again.

That night, you had so many orgasms. His hands, his mouth and his cock bought you to heaven. He fucked you hard and fast but also slow and full of passion.

I used to think that love was just so easy But I couldn't be less right, yeah

“I’ll miss you so much.” You told him that night before he left.

“I’ll miss you too, but we’ll make this work. I trust in us. We’ll talk every day and text and I’ll come visit you and you’ll come visit me too.” Ten said convinced that long-distance was going to work.

“I love you so much, never forget that okay.”

It could work. You could make this work. You were absolutely sure that you and Ten could make a long-distance relationship work. He was your best friend before you started dating, he would never hurt you and you would never hurt him and you trust him with your life.

It’s been almost two weeks since you last facetimed Ten. Yeah, you texted once in a while but it’s been so long since you talked and just be there for each other. You talked to him a month ago about feeling lonely and missing him and he promised you to make more time for you, but the last two weeks you barely talked.

You didn’t want to be clingy and suffocate him, so you waited for him to text you first. But every passing minute broke your heart more and more. You knew that he found new friends, but you would never doubt his faithfulness.

You closed your eyes and hugged your pillow tightly. Every night, you pretended that it was Ten you were hugging and not just your pillow. You missed his touch so much, you missed to kiss him and just hug him. You couldn’t take it anymore, you had to hear his voice. It was past midnight in New York but you didn’t care a t that moment.

“Yes?” you heard him yell. At least he answered.

“Ten? Can you hear me?” The other line was so loud, you raised your voice a little.

“What is it Y/n?! I’m busy!” you could hear loud music and people laughing around. “Busy? What are you doing?” it didn’t sound like he was busy.

“I’m out with some friends, look, I told you I’ll call you. Can’t you let me breathe for one day?” he said. Ten sounded annoyed and you could imagine how he rolled his eyes.

“It’s been two weeks since you said you’ll call! I let you breathe, but I was so worried, I just wanted to hear you voice-“

“You heard my voice, can I hang up now?”

You gasped, he sounded so cold, so annoyed and even distracted and before he could, you hung up.

You fell asleep crying. Once again.

Ten never apologized for that night and you never bought it up. It’s like talking to a wall. It took him a couple days to call you and he acted like that night never happened, like he never talked like he had enough of you.

The worst thing was yet to come.

Your one-year anniversary.

You reminded him one day before, that you would facetime, eat something together, watch a movie and just spend time together.

You waited and waited, but he never called.

You called him four times, texted him ten times, but he never answered and when you checked his Instagram story, you weren’t even surprised.

Ten was partying again. Ten ditched you to party on your one-year anniversary.

You realized that you were holding onto something that was long gone. It was over. It should be over. You were done with him, you were heartbroken and you regretted every decision you made. Maybe you should’ve stayed friends, maybe you would be happier and not suffering.

And I can't lie, babe, I'm losing my patience Too much waiting for you Every time that I wake up My hands go where I'm waiting for you I know I say that I'm fine But I'm losing my mind Just need to hold you Don't take your time Oh, baby

The next day, you had fifteen missed calls from Ten, but you decided to ignore him for a while and sort your thoughts. He texted you every day, apologizing and asking for forgiveness. Ten told you about his day even though you never texted back. You hated to be like this, but you needed space. You called him one week later and he answered immediately.

“H-Hi.” Ten whispered nervously.

“Hey.” You mumbled.

“How… how have you been?” Ten wanted to punch himself. How could he ask you that? He knew that you were feeling sad.

“Okay I guess.” You tried to hold back you tears.

“Look about-“

“I can’t do this anymore.” You just said it. You’ve been thinking about it for the past months actually, but you never thought you would get to this point. You never thought you would want to break up.

“W-What? N-no, no no no please Y/n. Look I’m sorry, I’m s-so sorry that I missed our anniversary, but please don’t do this-“

“It’s not just the anniversary! Everything is too much for me. You ignore me and you yell at me for caring and being worried a-and you ditched me so many times and o-our anniversary- you, fuck, you were out having fun while I was waiting for you! You tell me that you’re going to call, but you never do and when I call you because I miss you, you yell at me and call me annoying!”

You didn’t want to cry, but it was so hard not to.

“I-I’m sorry. I am really so fucking sorry. Y-You didn’t deserve all that, I fucked up. I promised to be there for you b-but-“ he stopped. You could hear him sniff and try to hold back his tears. Ten rarely cried, like, you saw him cry maybe one time.

“But?”

“But I was so overwhelmed with this city and with this school and dancing. I can’t lose you. You’re my everything. I’ll change! I’ll be a better boyfriend, but please, don’t leave me.” He cried out.

“I-It’s not that easy. Y-You broke my heart. I trusted in us, b-but maybe we aren’t meant to be.”

“No, no. No, don’t say that- you know that’s not true, you know that I love you more than anything. You are the most important person in my life.”

“Seems like I’m not as important as you think I am. I don’t want to be the reason you stop focusing on what’s important and that’s your dance school. That’s New York and m-my feelings are important too. I… I can’t remember the last time I was genuinely happy. I’m sorry, Ten. I’m really sorry.”

And before he could start talking again, you hung up. You broke out in tears, you clutched your heart and tried to keep it from exploding, but you felt the little piece stab your insides. Ten wasn’t doing any better. He cried and cried and regretted all of his choices, he regretted leaving you and moving to New York. He regretted ignoring you, he regretted leaving you on read. He regretted everything. Oh, how he wished he could turn back time and be a better boyfriend. A boyfriend you deserve, someone who makes you feel loved and not someone who hurts you.

It’s been a couple days since you talked to Ten. You had blocked him everywhere and you tried to ignore the pain in your heart. It was harder to break up and block him, but it was the only way to stop your suffering. You couldn’t let him treat you like that forever.

You couldn’t focus on anything. It was almost like he followed you everywhere. One day your mother send you pictures of prom and Ten was your date. You went as friends but you just realized that he looked at you with so much love in his eyes. His arm was around your waist and you looked at each other and smiled brightly. Then, you wanted to watch some Netflix and Netflix recommended you Step up. A movie about dancing. How ironic. Even the number Ten made you so sad and emotional.

Almost a week later, you got ready for bed. You were brushing your teeth when you heard the doorbell. Who could it be at this hour? You tiptoed and looked through the spy. Your jaw dropped when you saw his face.

“I can hear you breathing. Please open the door, I want to see your face. I missed you so much.”

You slowly opened the door and looked at him with teary eyes, he was about to step closer but he stood still, his body froze and his heart hurt. You weren’t doing any better. It’s been a year since you saw his pretty face and now he was standing right in front of you. You wanted to hug him, kiss him, just pull him closer and never let go again, but you were also frozen.

“I-I can’t be without you. Tell me to stay and I will.” He said and he looked absolutely serious.

You pulled him closer and hugged him as tightly as you could. Ten wrapped his arms around you pressed kisses on your hair. “I’ll do it, I’ll leave New York and come back to you. I just need you. I love you so much, Y/n.”

You sobbed and cried and it was so hard to breathe but you couldn’t stop yourself from crying harder. “I love you too, but I don’t want you to do t-that. I don’t want you to stop living your dream. I love you so much, but I won’t let you do that.”

“B-But I don’t want to lose you.” Ten whispered and caressed your hair softly. “Please forgive me, please. I was dumb, so fucking dumb. I didn’t realize how I treated you. I didn’t see that you were hurting and I promise you I’ll be better, I can’t lose you ever again. Please give me a second chance to make this right.”

You nodded and it felt so unreal to hold him in your arms. You waited for this moment for so long and he was finally in your arms. Seeing him helped you realize that you couldn’t be without him, that you needed your best friend, the love of your life.

“I love you so much.”

“I love you.”

You were cuddling under the blankets as Ten softly played with your hair, your head was on his chest. He also left kisses on your forehead, on your nose, on your lips, on every inch of your face and hands. Your hands were locked and he would never let go again.

“How did you even come? Don’t you have any classes to attend?” you asked him as you pecked his lips.

“I’ll just skip a few days, I won’t miss anything. Don’t worry about that.” He smiled softly.

Ten started drawing circles on your soft skin and you did the same on his chest. You looked up at him and pressed your lips on his, not just a simple peck. A kiss with so much longing and passion. A kiss to show him how much you missed him.

His hand slowly travelled to your waist and then to your ass. He squeezed it softly and pulled you on top of him, not breaking the kiss.

You moved your hips and his hands caressed the skin under your shirt. You broke the kiss for a second to get rid of your shirt. You weren’t wearing anything under your shirt and Ten cupped your breast with one hand and cupped your cheek with the other to kiss you again. He pinched your nipple and you let out a moan.

You could feel him slowly hardening and your hand found his belt. You unbuttoned his jeans and grabbed his shirt to take it off. You placed wet kisses on his chest and next thing you knew, you were under him.

Ten sucked on your boobs and pinched your nipples while he was busy pulling down your sweatpants and underwear. You were completely naked under him now and he kissed his way to your pussy. He parted your legs with his hands and you wanted to close them again, you were shy but then you remembered that this was Ten and you parted your legs even wider.

Ten softly kissed your pussy and then he ate you out like a starving man. He sucked on your clit and when he inserted two fingers inside of your wet cunt, you lost it. You tried to hide your moans but you couldn’t, your grip around the sheets tightened and you could see the stars, you can’t even remember the last time you had an orgasm, that’s why you came embarrassingly fast. You couldn’t hold back and came all over his fingers. “I’m cuming, fuck, feels so good.”

Ten didn’t stop playing with your clit, even after you came and you were so sensitive, you almost came again but he stopped and crawled back up to kiss you. “I love you.” He mumbled before he pulled his boxers down.

“I love you- so much.”

He was rock hard already and ready to be inside of you. He didn’t need you to suck him off, he just needed to be inside of you.

“I missed fucking you, I missed your tight little cunt so much.” And before you could answer that you missed him fucking you too, he rammed his cock inside of you. You moaned so loud, you hoped the neighbors wouldn’t hear you, but you wouldn’t hold back- you were feeling way too good to shut up.

“Fuck me, fuck me please.”

And he did.

Ten fucked you hard and fast, he gripped your hips tightly and fucked you deep, hitting the right spot and making you lose your mind. You clenched around him and he could feel himself getting closer. He looked you deep in the eyes and your boobs bounced up every time he moved his hips. He loved how fucked out you looked, so pretty and innocent.

“L-Let me ride you, please-“ you moaned out and who was he to refuse? He loved seeing you on top him.

You were riding him now, he gripped your hands again to thrust up. He couldn’t take away his eyes from your boobs or your face. You threw your head back, you felt your second orgasm nearing and feeling his hands on your boob, pinching your nipples turned you even more on.

“I’m gonna cum, gonna cum-“ and you came and Ten couldn’t hold back and he shot his cum inside of you. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good.”

You moved your hips to ride out your orgasms and you collapsed on top of him. Ten pulled his cock out of your cunt and then he got up to bring a warm towel to clean you up. After he was done cleaning you up, he got into bed and pulled you up to his chest. You were naked under the covers but you didn’t mind, his body was warm and cozy.

“I love you.” He placed a kiss on your temple.

“I love you too.” And you fell asleep in the arms of the love of your life.

Your relationship was even stronger than before. After Ten left for New York again, you were scared that it wouldn’t work out, but it did. He was always there for you and you were always there for him. You visited him on Valentine’s day and he visited you on your birthday. Your love grew and before you could realize that you’ve been dating for three years, you were packing your stuff to move out of your apartment.

Yes, you were moving to New York, to your boyfriend and you’ve been thinking about this for months now and it was the best decision you’ve ever made. You’re living with your best friend, who became your boyfriend, in New York City.

Baby (14:24): SPOTTED! The love of my life in Starbucks, with an iced coffee in her hand. Who is she waiting for? Perhaps her boyfriend? Stay tuned. XOXO gossip girl.

You laughed out loud in Starbucks as you read the text Ten just sent you. You laughed a little too loud, a couple looked at you and you apologized for laughing so loud.

Ten entered Starbucks and kissed you on the lips. “Babe, gossip girl? Really?” you giggled and wrapped your arms around him. “You know you love me.”

And that was the truth. “You’re right.”

379 notes · View notes

catzula · 3 years

Text

It’s hard NOT to be a fangirl (especially when the setter is Oikawa Tooru)

A/N: is it evident how much in love I am with this man? I cried at his backstory, I did that. Well, uh, hope you enjoy! And I have a mountain of hw and exams coming up so I might not be able to write something so thats that.

Warnings: spoilers!!! For the spring tournament so beware. Cursing? 5.9k? Oikawa crying in the end? Its NOT angst tho. Also not edited cuz its 1 am

Genre: fluff, Iwaizumi's sister!reader

Synopsis: maybe confusing you with a fangirl wasn't exactly starting off the right foot, but Oikawa thought the stranger that sat with him till the beginning of his next match was... quite charming.

Oikawa might've been many, many things, but he was not a coward.

Most of the time, at least.

Whenever it was his feelings he had to be brave about, he never succeeded, especially not when they were towards you. You, who laughed and stood with him, never across but always beside him. Oikawa couldn't afford to be brave.

It was the first day of the Interhigh matches when he had met you. To say Oikawa was having a bad day would be an underestimation. He got dumped by his girlfriend that very day, right before his match, and brutally ripped out of the soft, consoling presence of his fans by Iwaizumi. He just wanted to be fawned over and comforted, maybe eat a snack or two while he was at it, but he didn't even get to do that?

"Stop pouting, Shittykawa." Iwaizumi muttered when Oikawa made an exaggerated 'hmph!' sound for the 20th time the last 5 minutes. "We need to go to the gym, and you need to focus."

"You need to focus too!" Oikawa protested, "but look at you getting ready to go to a date- hey, agh!" Holding the back of his head, Oikawa pouted even deeper this time. "You didn't need to hit me!" Oikawa whisper-yelled.

"I told you to shut the fuck up. Hold your tongue if you don't want to get beaten." Iwaizumi whispered angrily, sending a side glance at his coach to try and see if he had heard stupid Oikawa. Iwaizumi took a breath of relief when the coach didn't even look his way.

"We're gonna sit in the back stands so coach won't be able to see us. You can still watch the game from there, too." Iwaizumi finally spoke after they arrived in the gym, eyes scanning the room to find the perfect hiding place.

"You mean I am gonna sit in the back stands, all alone, cold and freshly dumped." Oikawa frowned, his frown only growing deeper when his best friend rolled his eyes. "Am I wrong? Tell me I'm wrong! As you go on your marry way with your girlfriend, I will be sitting here alone and wallow in my sadness for what... 6 hours?!"

Iwaizumi clenched his teeth, knowing Oikawa had a point. Sighing, he rubbed his temples. "Look, fuck, I'm sorry, okay? Should I tell her I can't come?" He asked gruffly, and despite all his brutality and harsh words, Oikawa knew he would do it if he said the word. "Nah, it's okay. Have fun in your date!" Oikawa answered, earning a baffled glare from the boy.

"Then why the fuck have you been guilt tripping me the past hour?"

"I'm lonely, Iwa-chan! I want attention." Oikawa grinned, professionally avoiding the slap coming his way, his grin growing even wider when Iwaizumi pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. " I wonder how I didn't murder you already. Anyway, settle there, and don't move anywhere until the match. And I mean, anywhere, no visiting your fans, looking at yourself in the bathroom mirror, taking selfies before the windows, nothing."

"Okay, okay, I'm not dumb!" Oikawa whined as he threw his gym bag on the free seats. "Say hi to her for me, Iwa-chan!" He called after his best friend.

~~~

It had been almost an hour since Iwa had left, and Oikawa was losing his mind. Why did he agree to this again? He wanted to sit with the rest of his team, that sat across the court but Iwaizumi had told him not to move anywhere (and Oikawa was still a bit hurt at how grateful they seemed when Iwa had told them Oikawa would be sitting separately), so he had opted to social media.

Oikawa wasn't aware of someone else entering the secret back stands and getting closer to him as he watched a short compilation of cat videos. "Oikawa-kun?" You approached him, hiding your snicker when he jumped in his place to look at you. He was quick to hide his shock, a mask of smugness quickly finding its place on his pretty face.

"That's me." He smiled, his chocolate eyes scanning you and meeting your eyes back quickly. He watched as you sat a seat away from him, close but not approachable. He quirked his brow when you stood quiet, holding your phone a little too tightly. A shy fan, how sweet, he thought, smirking as he turned your way. He had an idea of what you wanted.

"Did you, perhaps, want a photo? I might not look as I normally would, though." Oikawa suggested, going by how you held your phone, checking the time every once in a while, you wanted a picture. His brows raised when you didn't say a word but bit your lip as if holding in a smile.

"That's your que to say 'no, Oikawa-kun, you look amazing!" He told you, not expecting your laugh to ring in his ears, baffled both by how sudden and how pretty the sound was. "No, you do look tired, actually." You finally answered, earning a gasp from the boy across you.

"Oh, to think I was going to see the days of my fans calling me tired-looking and ugly!" He dramatically brought his hand to his face, peeking through his fingers to see what you were going to do. You should at least deny he looked ugly, he thought, but his eyes grew wide when you chuckled. Now you were just rude! Did he really look that bad?

"Sorry, I'm not a fan." You pressed your lips in an apologetic smile, trying to hold it sorry and not smug when you spotted the blush on his cheeks. "Oh- I thought..." He cleared his throat to hide the embarrassment. "Most of the pretty girls like you who aproach me are my fans, so I just assumed." He spoke when he finally managed to find back his high-toned, flirty persona.

"That crowd of groupies in the entrance should belong to you, too, then?" You teased, not expecting him to answer yes, bursting into laughter with the unexpected positive answer.

"I kind of have to ask, though, if you're not my fan, why did you approach me, calling my name?" He seemed nonchalant as if he was used to that, but you had to admit it was a bit creepy.

"Oh, Haji- Iwaizumi sent me." You corrected yourself when you remembered how your brother had told you not to tell Oikawa you were siblings (he had warned you about how flirtatious Oikawa could get, and he might see it as a challenge if he figured you were his best friend's sibling. You didn't think it was true, they were best friends after all, but it was better to be cautious anyway.

"Iwa-chan? Ah, so he does care after all!" Oikawa blurted out, his words reminding how your brother had sent you here and how it was something way different than caring. "Well, he did want me to make sure you didn't leave here or call your ex. Heard you had some... problems."

"Cold as a stone, as always." He sighed, and you chuckled. "Can't exactly call it a problem, but being dumped isn't the best feeling in the world." He shrugged, taking a sip out of his water before flashing you a charming smile. Your brows furrowed when he admitted he was dumped, of course, Hajime had already told you that, but judging the boy by his looks, his nonchalant acts, and everything your brother had told to warn you, you hadn't expected him to admit that, especially not to a stranger.

"Well, uh, that sucks." You answered awkwardly, not knowing how to approach the situation. "I'm sorry about that."

"Its okay, as it was bound to happen, anyway. Our relationship wasn't exactly sailing smoothly." He shrugged, but it was evident he was a bit broken about it. "I- uh, I'm not the person people would come for advice in these kind of situations, but I can... listen?"

You felt something warm blooming in your chest when his gaze locked on you, chocolate brown eyes the prettiest you've ever seen, but the surprised, almost grateful look was what made you feel that way. Did he only want someone to listen?

"It's okay, I don't want to burden you with my stupid problems." He chuckled, pulling his playful nature back on the surface. "I don't even know your name."

"Oh, shit, you're right!" You laughed when you realized you hadn't even told him your name but had offered a shoulder to cry on. "I'm Y/N, nice to meet you." You stuck your hand out, his warm (big-) hand gripping yours and causing that warm feeling that was in your chest to spread even more.

"Y/N-chan, it's very nice to meet you." He winked. "So, what is your relationship with our dearest Iwa-chan?"

"Oh- well, uh... you could say he sees me as a sister." You shrugged, not expecting him to pout sympathetically. "Oh no, sibling-zoned? That's harsh, man."

"No it's- hey, you have no right to pity me, you're the one freshly dumped!"

"Hitting low, are we?" He laughed, making you laugh with him. "You look like you're gonna die if you don't ask me how we broke up." He sighed after a second, although he still had a playful smirk. "I guess I have to tell you." He sighed one more time. "We're stuck here for at least 5 hours, anyway."

~~~

"Here you go, a granola bar. Are you sure you didn't want anything else?" You tossed the granola bar to Oikawa, who had his legs on the seats in front of him, making himself comfortable in the uncomfortable seats.

"Yeah, that's enough. Thank you, Y/N-chan." He smiled cheekily, opening the packet with his teeth. "The match is in about an hour, anyway, I shouldn't eat much."

"Sure, whatever you say. Well you were talking about a new player before I left."

"Before your stomach started to scream, you mean." He laughed, and you found yourself watching the smile. These past few hours had flown by so quickly that it almost felt like barely an hour. Oikawa was easy to talk to, and you always found something new to talk about, laughing almost at everything he said. He was really charming, and the confidence that oozed out of every move he did, every word he spoke was attractive, you had to admit.

But as much of a smug player he could be, he often acted childish, too, especially when he talked about a certain Kouhei of his did you see the childlike jealousy and competitiveness clearly. Though despite that, he would have a fond, soft look in his eyes whenever he talked about his teammates, making you feel almost jealous at how affectionate he looked about them.

You knew he was charming and flirtatious, your brother had warned you not to get close because he could and would have you falling for him in no time, but you had underestimated him. You had thought he was acting overly cautious as always, but apparently not.

You saw him checking his phone for a new message. "I gotta go warm up now." He told you as he stood up, the playful glint in his eyes not being missed by you. "I trust you'll watch and cheer for me, right, Y/N-chan?" His smirk was self-satisfied, already knowing the answer, but you didn't want to give him the pleasure. "I'd rather cheer for the ace, actually, much cooler than a setter."

Another dramatic gasp came from the proud setter, making you laugh. "How dare you! Setters are much cooler than aces, I'll have you know. I'll prove it in this match, too." He leaned towards you, and although you already knew how long he was, having him towering over you like this sent goosebumps down your spine. "I'll prove it, just make sure you watch closely."

~~~

"So, was I right or was I right?" Your phone chimed with a new message, and you instantly knew who it was that sent the message. You opened Instagram, accepting the message request.

"I couldn't tell since I was watching the ace the whole time, didn't have the chance to see if you were cooler." You texted back, almost able to see the pout forming on his lips on the other side of the screen. It was a lie, too. The moment you saw his serve, you were unable to take your eyes off him. He looked like a different person on the court. It was almost scary, how focused he suddenly became the moment he grabbed the ball, how he was aware of everything that was happening around him, developing strategies half you didn't even understand and it was terrifyingly beautiful, you had to admit.

"Mean! And I had played exceptionally well just because you were watching :(" You giggled at the text, not noticing how your brother's eyes were narrowed and turned to you instead of the TikToks his girlfriend had sent him. "Who are you talking to?"

"Hm?" You flinched, so concentrated on your phone, you had forgotten your brother was there, too. "Oh, no one. My friend sent me a meme." You stared back at your brother, who was still watching you with narrowed eyes, waiting for you to crack, but you didn't. He nodded curtly, and though he could've pursued it further if not for his phone starting to buzz, the name of his girlfriend appearing on the screen.

"Gotta take this." He told you, standing up and making his way to his room. "Don't stay up late texting." He told you as a warning.

You wished you had taken your brother's advice the next morning when he came in to wake you up. You had texted Oikawa for hours into the night, only stopping when you fell asleep mid-conversation.

"Y/N, I need you to come to the sport center again, today." Hajime told you as you were brushing your teeth, and he was putting gel in his hair to make it look like his signature spiky style. "Again?" You rolled your eyes, earning a soft slap on your head from your brother.

"Don't talk with your mouth full, and don't roll your eyes at me."

"I'll do whatever I- Ow! Okay, okay, I'll be there!" You muttered angrily, but a part of you, the smallest part of you, wasn't as angry as you showed him to be.

~~~

You were there before him, this time. It had been almost 10 minutes since you had arrived, but Oikawa was nowhere to be seen (and you got ready especially neatly this time! What a shame). You sighed, opening your phone to text Hajime Oikawa wasn't here just as you felt a pair of warm hands closing your eyes from your back.

"Quick, tell me the coolest volleyball position!"

"Ace!" You answered and heard his exaggerated sigh. "No, Y/N-chan, I thought we clarified this yesterday!"

"I never admitted to it, though." You told him with a sly smile, causing his fake anger and annoyance to fall and a laugh to breakthrough. "Clever little Y/N-chan." He muttered, plopping down to the seat next to you.

"You look tired." You remarked, making him gasp. "And whose fault is that? You fell asleep! I waited an hour for you to write back, thinking you had something else to do." He frowned, making you chuckle.

"I take none of the blame, you talk too much." You teased.

"Only with people I like." He shot back, catching you off guard and making your eyes widen. "Ah, finally, I won this round!" He cheered. "You, on the other hand, look especially nice today, madame."

"Thank you, kind sir, I got a good night sleep, unlike you." You smiled cheekily, and he was about to answer before loud cheering filled the room and made you wince. You noticed how almost everyone was on their feet, watching the game closely.

"What's going on?" You asked the boy sitting next to you, now also watching the game with a Cheshire cat smirk.

"Karasuno's game started." He answered without taking his eyes off the game. "It was the freakish quick they used just then that caused the cheering."

"The freakish quick?" You repeated.

"Yeah, watch." He told you, sounding excited and annoyed at the same time. You turned your eyes to where he was pointing at, a short, ginger boy. Your brows furrowed, trying to understand just why-

"Oh, shit." You gaped when the boy flew over the court in mere seconds. The ball was on the other side of the net in almost less than a second, and it took you a moment to realize they had just made a spike.

"Oh shit, indeed," Oikawa answered, his smirk still on his lips, but his eyes weren't looking humored. "That little bastard, he had to be this fucking talented." He muttered, speaking almost to himself.

"You don't look worried, though." You smiled. "There is no reason for me to be worried." He smirked proudly in answer, although it had a slight waver to it. "I'm much better than him as a setter. What worries me is the team itself."

"Are they that good? You looked much better in the match yesterday."

"Ah, I knew you were watching me, Y/N-chan! I'm too pretty not to look at." He swiped a soft-looking lock of hair out of his face with a playful smile.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." You muttered, hiding your embarrassment from him by turning back to the game. "See him, the short boy in the back, he's the libero." Oikawa told you, getting slightly closer to explain, and you would've understood it if it wasn't for how close he was all of a sudden. "He's one of the best I've seen, actually."

"W-what makes him so special?" You asked, turning your eyes back to the game from his pretty face (as if he wasn't handsome enough, he also had a good side profile?!) "That." he answered, his eyes glinting with something you could say awe. You turned back to the boy who leaped to the ground after the ball, his hand sliding over the surface and sending the ball straight up. "His reflexes are unbeleivable, and he's fast and smart, like the rest of his team." He explained further, not aware of how focused he suddenly was, and it was clear he was passionate about the sport. You had never understood why your brother felt devastated after a lost game, or why he was cheering on the top of his lungs, sometimes pushing himself so hard in training that he passed out, coming home late almost every day because of his practice.

But seeing Oikawa watch the game, seeing him in the game, you felt like you could understand what it was. You could never grasp the feeling, but you could understand what it was. And it was infuriating, made you jealous, and you couldn't understand why, but it also amazed you, making you yearn for the strange feeling.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I must be boring you to death." He realized, bringing his hand to scratch the back of his neck in embarrassment, cheeks flushing slightly after talking for almost an hour about everything going in the game, explaining them all in detail.

"No, no its fine!" You answered, laughing at his flushed face. It was funny how he was a charming, devilish, smart, and manipulative guy at one second and a volleyball geek the other. "It helps me appreciate the game better." You shrugged, not aware of how his eyes glinted with your answer. "But don't you think I realized how you're overlooking everything the setter does. You didn't say anything about him."

"What, you're interested in him?" He pouted, causing you to laugh.

"I didn't say I was interested, I'm just telling you you're ignoring him!" You protested after your laugh, but he still had a frown. "Sounds like you're interested, to me."

"No! Okay, okay, keep ignoring him, then. But don't think I missed the jelaousy-" You couldn't finish your sentence because of a sudden hand closing on your lips. "Nope, we don't say that here." He whispered, and somehow, you were able to hear him despite the loud cheering, the crowd, and the loud thumps of your heart.

"What, saying you're jealous?" You spoke beneath his fingers, noticing how his smirk grew wider and cheeks flushing pinker.

"Yep, let's not repeat that and I'll take my hand off you." He waited a few seconds as you stood silent, removing his hand, still having a suspicious look in his eyes. "Good girl." He told you, causing your eyes to widen and shout a protest. "O-oikawa! What the fuck?!"

"What, I didn't mean anything?" He answered innocently, but there was still a smirk on his lips. "Well, okay, I'll tell you about him if you're so curious." He sighed.

"As I said before, he's my Kouhei." You nodded for him to go on. "He's... talented. Very talented. A genius, actually." He laughed uncomfortably. "He's not on my level yet, but his talent... it even makes up for it and I hate to see how despite all my days I spent training, he's still better than me easily."

"I- oh." You muttered, not expecting something like this, especially for him to admit someone else was better than him and will always be better than him.

"Tomorrow we're playing with them." He told you, and despite the forced smile, you could see how he clenched his teeth. "I can't- I won't lose to him."

"You won't." You agreed.

"I'll fight as hard as I can but we won't lose to them. I'll fight Shiratorizawa, I'll play against Ushiwaka and show him, prove him I did the right thing by choosing Seijoh and not his dumb school." He looked determined, eyes glinting with such determination that even though you had no idea what he was saying at that point, you wanted to agree and cheer him on.

"You will." You agreed once again, causing him to smile. "I'm sorry, I think I'm just a bit stressed."

You smiled, shrugging as if to say it's nothing. "No, no problem, I understand what you mean. It must be nerve-wracking."

"Well, it is."

"I'm horrible at advice, but uh, want me to show you what I do when I'm stressed? Like before exams and stuff. It might help." You smiled, extending your hand out to show him, not expecting him to do the same, and hold your hand like a handshake.

"You're right, that does help." He grinned, shaking your hand and making you burst into laughter. "That wasn't what I was going to do!"

"Oh, it wasn't? Still helped, though!" He told you innocently, teasing you even more. "C'mon, stick your hand out like this." You giggled.

"Now start drawing-" you told him, focusing on drawing shapes and letters in his hand. He was going to say a snarky remark at how that wasn't how it went, but Oikawa couldn't bring himself to stop you from doing whatever you were doing as he watched you focus on his hand, fingers running over his calloused ones, the tip of your tongue sticking out from the corner of your mouth without realizing, and every move of your finger sent goosebumps down his body.

Noticing you had lost yourself in thought, absent-mindedly going on drawing on his hand for a good few minutes, you raised your eyes to meet his brown ones. "Does that... help?"

"It- uh, it does. I'll need you to do this before the game tomorrow, too, though." He smirked playfully, his hand closing on yours just as he said it. "Well, I'm glad I could help." You shrugged, trying to hide how embarrassed you were. You could tell he already knew how you were feeling by the smile on his lips, but instead of teasing you about it, he turned to the game without letting your hand go, smiling even wider when you didn't pull it, either.

~~~

"You guys were great at the game today." You texted Oikawa that night, not sure whether he would answer, though your thoughts disappeared when he texted back instantly.

"It must be your doing." He wrote, sending a picture of him doing the peace sign right after.

"I don't think I can come early tomorrow, though. I won't be able to do it again. Are you ready for the game tomorrow?"

"Oh no, how could you? I can never overcome the stress now. Will you let me call you if I say I'm not ready?" He texted back, making you chuckle.

"Just this once."

Your phone started ringing right after, a 'yahoo' greeting you when you picked it up.

"Hi, Oikawa-kun."

"Are you free?" He asked, and you shrugged as if he was across you and not on the other side of the phone. "I was getting ready to bed."

"Thinking of me before bed, you must have a crush on me, Y/N-chan." He chuckled, somehow still able to tease you through the phone. "Hey, I-"

"No, actually, don't answer that." He stopped you. "I had something else in mind when I called you, but you cute voice is too distracting." He sighed.

"Oh." You answered, making him laugh, his laugh ringing in your ears.

"Yeah, well... I was wondering, I mean after the match tomorrow." He cleared his throat. "No, actually, will you cheer for me tomorrow?" He finally asked, and you could tell he was holding his breath.

"Cheer for you?" You repeated.

"Yeah, only- only for me." He spoke, this time merely a whisper. "I mean, of course you cheer for me, everyone does because I'm that-"

"Yes, Oikawa." You laughed and cut his self appreciating ramble off. "I'll cheer for you, and only you."

"Y-you will? Well then, maybe you'll accept my offer to perhaps grab a coffee or something after the game? To make up for not being there with me tomorrow?" You were trying to stifle a laugh at how unsmooth he was despite his reputation when he spoke again. "Am I- am I pushing it? I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"No, you're not making me uncomfortable!" You protested quickly, already aware of how dramatic he could get. "I'm just, well, surprised. But yes, I'd like to grab a coffee with you. Anywhere but those god awful stands, actually." You chuckled, hearing the relieved breathe coming from his side of the line.

"Well, if that's settled," he spoke, and you could hear the smile in his voice. "Tell me, Y/N-chan, what's your favorite color?"

Wow, you thought, he really sucked at flirting.

~~~

"I'm here." You texted both your brother and Oikawa. It was merely minutes away from the start of the game, all because of a dumb chemistry quiz you had at school. You finally found a free seat when you noticed they were done warming up and were getting ready.

"Good, we're about to start the game. I'll probably meet my gf after the game, so don't start crying if you don't see me." Was the first text you got, rolling your eyes at how much of an idiot your brother was. "Yeah, whatever, not like I'm here to see you." You texted back, noticing how his head perked up when he read the text, eyes scanning the seats to find you as he texted a "WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?!"

"Wish me luck, Y/N-chan, just remember your promise to cheer for me ;p" Oikawa texted back, also raising his head to search you in the crowd, but he was successful at finding you, eyes locking for a second, of course, he sent a playful wink at you.

The game started after that, and you could swear you were losing years of your life with each given and taken points. You had screamed at the top of your lungs at one point, so worked up, you sometimes forgot what was happening.

"Oikawa, good serve!" You screamed (he had told you to say that when he was serving the day before, and you could see it immediately brought a smile on his lips).

The third set was the worst, you thought. No one ever got to widen the point gap, always one of them at match point, points being given and being taken, and you were sure you were going to lose your mind if they-

You watched as Oikawa ran to receive a ball, running so fast that he was unable to stop himself from crashing into the table, falling on his bad knee that you could only imagine how much it hurt, but not before pointing at Hajime, your brother, the ace. He set an incredible ball for him, incredible even for someone like you who didn't know anything other than the basics about volleyball.

You could feel tears swelling in your eyes as he tumbled into the table, pulling himself back up almost immediately and limping back towards the court.

He was... he was determined to win.

But he couldn't.

You watched as Oikawa tried to receive the ball flying towards him and failed. You couldn't watch when he realized he failed. He lost. But he was still there to make his teammates gather for the lineup, patting them on the back to cheer them up, thanking the crowd, but his face was down, helping his teammates collect themselves back, your brother too when he was also devastated inside.

Still, Oikawa managed to hold it all in, unlike your brother and most of the team that was crying. You couldn't hide your disappointment in, either, eyes already wet with tears because you thought they were going to win, and they thought they were going to win too, and seeing Oikawa like this, it hurt. You watched them as they left the court, your eyes following the brunette who had separated himself from the rest of the team, going somewhere else with a quick pace.

You rose to your feet without even realizing it, running after him without thinking what to say or to do, but you just wanted to be there, and you were so focused on finding him that you hadn't realized Hajime following his friend or rather, you, either.

You were about to enter the room Oikawa had entered a minute before you when someone held you by the arm and pulled you back. "Y/N, don't." Your brother warned you, and maybe you should've listened since they were friends for years. "It's not- you shouldn't go in, not right now. Give him time."

He sighed when you freed your arm from his grip. "He wouldn't want you to-" the door shut in his face, and he only got a glimpse of his best friend's tear-stricken face, "-see him like that." Iwaizumi finished his sentence as a whisper to himself.

You thought this might've been a bad idea the moment you entered the room. "O-oikawa?"

"What are you doing here?" You heard him say, the room dim-litted, making it near impossible to see his expression, but something in you told you, you didn't want to. "I'm- well, I'm here to see if you're okay-"

"Get out." You heard him say, merely a whisper but still there. "I don't want you to see me like this, stop looking at me! I don't want to see the same pity I see at everyone else's face, pitying me for losing to my own Kouhei and-" His voice getting higher and higher with each word, he was almost screaming the last few words. So you hugged him, you didn't know what led you to do so, was it instinct to relieve his tension? You didn't know, but it still worked, you noticed.

His stiff muscles started to relax with the sudden contact, and though he stood as still as a stone, not hugging you back, you didn't feel rejected. "Shh, I know." You whispered, breathe brushing over his skin and sending goosebumps down his spine.

"We lost." He whispered, a sob finding its way out of his lips. His arms came up, hugging and pulling you to himself, almost as if he tried to swallow you whole, burying his face to your hair. He was big, much bigger than you, for sure, so the sobs that shook him shook you, too, but you didn't mind.

"We lost." He sobbed again, and again, and again and again. It took him a while to let it all out, but he felt better when he did. His arms were still around you when his cries had died, your scent affecting him to relax.

"Thank you." You heard him whisper as he pulled back, not looking in your eyes once. "Of- of course." You shrugged, feeling somewhat awkward as he wiped his face with a tissue.

"Well," he spoke, looking in your eyes for the first time for what felt like hours, "that's me. The Oikawa Tooru. Now you know me better than almost anyone else." He shrugged, trying to sound and look indifferent but failing miserably. His voice and his hands shaking, eyes looking at you with almost fear.

"Are you going to leave now?"

"Leave?" You repeated.

He shrugged. "Now that you've seen I'm not the clever captain or the charming playboy, but a- an insecure, jealous man, who is now also a failure, are you going to leave?"

"Oikawa," you whispered, noticing he was more insecure than he let on. "Just because you are more than what you look like, it doesn't cancel the others. You're still the smart, cunning, and amazing captain, the charming flirt who made me fall for him in mere days, and the man who lost a match with a point. A man, striving to be better than everyone else, with goals and a purpose in life. I don't think I could leave you for having a purpose in life." You chuckled.

"Well, that of course if you-" Before you got to finish, you felt pressure on your lips, stopping you from talking. It was his soft lips, this time, making you silent. It was a soft kiss, his hand cupping your cheek and pulling your face towards his, his lips were almost brushing yours, but it still felt heavenly.

"I think we should go before your brother marches in and kills us both." He whispered to your lips with a sly smile. "Yeah, I think you're- wait, you knew he was my brother?!" You exclaimed, making him chuckle.

"Of course I did, who do you take me for? I am the clever captain of Seijoh, I knew it the moment you told me you were like a sister to him."

"Well, the clever captain of Seijoh, use your brain to find us another way out but the door, since I'm pretty sure Haji is guarding it."

"Ah, I have the perfect idea." He snickered, picking up his phone, and entering the name of Hajime's girlfriend.

"Tooru, where are you, are you okay, do you-"

"Hey, hey, I'm alright, I just need a favor." Oikawa whispered into the phone. "I'm stuck inside a room, and the door is being guarded by Iwa-chan whose waiting to kill me, so please get him out of here?"

"Tooru, are you with a girl?" You heard the voice screaming on the other end of the line, making you both wince. "Please just help me just this once?"

You heard her sigh. "Okay, okay, hang in there." She closed the phone, and it took only two seconds for your brother's phone to ring.

You were in awe when Hajime suddenly screamed, "What?! Whose checking you out? I'm fucking coming baby, don't move anywhere." sprinting down the hall.

"You're a magician."

"I'm amazing." He muttered right before leaning in for yet another kiss, smiling against your soft lips.

#haikyu x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #oikawa x reader #oikawa imagine #oikawa scenarios #oikawa tooru x reader #hq oikawa #haikyuu oikawa #oikawa fluff #hq x reader #hq imagines #hq x you #haikyuu!!

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blackknightgargiemoviephile · 3 years

Text

How To Train Your Dragon Saga

In the beginning, I was never really interested in watching the movie and never even bothered to watch the trailer, since we thought it was one of those cliche failure movies (and Dreamworks hasn't really had a very good track record of good animated movies at the time), but after being bombarded with tons of Toothcup fanfics and fanarts and after very high recommendations by my friend Jello13 from dA, I finally got down to watching the movie. Boy, was I glad I took my friend's recommendation to watch this movie, and the subsequent sequels after that, because after 3, 4 friggin' times, I still fucking LOVE this movie!!!

Here's my findings of the saga:

Apparently this movie was based on a children's novel written by Cressida Cowell which focuses on the 2nd book in a 10-volume book franchise. There are certain deviations between the real Hiccup and Toothless and the storyline as a whole, but after reading the summary of the original story, I think I like the movie version better. In fact even the writer said so in her blog that she likes the deviation as the movie captured the core essence of her story and it was amazing to see her story to be interpreted this way.

The storyline and the pacing is very good, and the sarcastic humour and slight optimism of Hiccup despite people thinking he's anything BUT a Viking is very intriguing. I love his catchphrases like "I'm way too muscular for their tastes. They wouldn't know what to do with all...this" and "Thank you for summing that up" and his famous line "You just gestured to ALL of me!" is just some of the LOL-worthy lines the talented Jay Baruchel who voices Hiccup does.

I was totally shocked to find out that Gerard Butler plays the role of Stoick, Hiccup's old man! I have never expect him, who is known for his brawniness and action-packed persona, made famous in the movie 300, would actually play a voice-over for a cartoon character. After finding out, spotting his voice and hearing the familiarity was much, much easier.

And of course, the creme de la creme of the entire movie: TOOTHLESS!! He is just so, so, so, soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo uber cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute~~~~!!!!! When I read about him in fanfics and caught glimpses of him through fanarts, I was thinking, "Hey, this dragon is quite cute." Now amplify that feeling by a gajillion times more. That's how I feel about Toothless. He started off a little vicious with his snake-like slit for eyes, trying to act strong and tough like the dragon he was, but the moment he let his guard down a little, he got these pair of big doe eyes that is just so MOE and SQUEE-worthy. And of course I finally learn how he got his namesake: with retractable teeth that he can materialize at will

My most favourite scene of the entire movie would be this scene where Toothless finally was at peace with Hiccup and allowed him to touch him. The way Toothless tried to copy his drawing, and then growled whenever Hiccup stepped on his drawing, then Hiccup moved to avoid the lines in tune with the music until finally they were so close they were allowed to touch was just so AWW-worthy. And the music score was perfect too, especially the title of that score: Forbidden Friendship. Isn't that just sweet?

The part where Hiccup and Toothless slowly develop that bond while trying to get Toothless back on his flight feet again was also very interesting as they slowly worked together and forget each other's differences to reach a common goal, while at the same time trying to learn about each other, and Hiccup using that knowledge to good use (the eel and the scratching of the neck part was really epic), making him the life of the team, much to his crush, Astrid's chagrin.

I also love the part where Hiccup tries to convince everyone during the final exam of killing a dragon that dragons are not what they think they are, and tried to pacify the Monstrous Nightmare only to be interrupted by Stoick and having Toothless coming to the rescue (damsel in distress much, Hiccup? XD) and revealed their relationship. It felt really sad and my heart just broke when Hiccup shouted Toothless for him not to kill Stoick and Toothless looked at him with his doe eyes, then Hiccup tries in vain to stop everyone from hurting Toothless, and that argument which led to his disowning, and earning back his role as a son by proving his worth and Toothless' reputation, though a cost of his leg. I was wondering where would be the scene where he looses his leg, since I read that he had a prosthetic in fanfics, but turns out it happened in the near end of the movie, and literally mirrored Toothless' missing left tail fin.

Ending is a bit cliche where he gets the girl, he is lauded as a war hero and gained the respect of everyone including his father, the dragons made peace with humans and all that, but still it was a very heartwarming cliche scene. One that leaves a smile on your face and a sigh of contentment in your heart.

Speaking of Astrid, not really sure it's because of that yaoi in me, but I never really saw Astrid as a suitable pairing for Hiccup. I know, I'm not usually one for bestiality, but seriously, can't you just FEEL the love between Hiccup and Toothless to the point where you can consider them as lovers? Toothcup (Toothless/Hiccup) pairings are in the rage right now since the movie has been uber popularize, and you cannot deny that sort of relationship exist, right?

This one, personally I feel, is almost as par as the first one. Not better, not worse, but more or less par. Hiccup and Astrid are still together, but the Toothcup shipper in me just don't feel like they match somehow. Moreso, suddenly out of the blue, Snotlout and Fishlegs were heads over heels with Ruffnut, which I ABSOLUTELY have NO CHEMISTRY feel whatsoever! Even after I've watched their TV series that led to the second movie, I STILL don't get the vibe or the chemistry between those three people. It's like "Wait, what?" moment.

Although that moment when Ruffnut was just totally thirsty for Eret was absolutely hilarious though. I couldn't help laughing and cringing at the same time.

When the moment Hiccup's mom Valka showed up, I was not expecting her to be so... skinny. Stoick said that he made helmets out of Hiccup's mom's breast plate, and it seemed pretty big, but looking at her, she didn't look like someone who was close to being a big bosom woman, but what is continuity anyways? LOL Though Hiccup definitely has inherited her knack for dragons. Guess it's in the blood after all.

I teared up a little when Stoick died, and I felt so bad that their bromance was threatened by this, but thankfully Hiccup still loves Toothless and is willing to forgive him and try to bring him back to his side. Goes to show how deep their bond is, and Toothless ended up becoming the Alpha Dragon was one of the most epic moments in the whole movie.

It also kinda interesting that Hiccup has somehow became pretty hot in this movie. Was pretty surprised at how he transformed from the awkward tiny little runt of a boy to a strapping man LOL

Plot feels similar to the 2nd one, but the ending was so so SO bittersweet. A fitting ending, but sweet yet painful for me to watch.

My heart broke at the scene wen Hiccup was complaining about Toothless being in love n said "Am I not enough?" and I was like internally screaming "YES! U ARE ENOUGH!! U TWO ARE ENOUGH!! FUCK THAT LIGHT FURY!!"

Throughout the courtship scene btwn Toothless and the Light Fury i was like internally screaming "NO, SHE'S A TRAP! SHE'S A FUCKING TRAP! HICCUP, WHY ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS?! I'M NOT HAPPY WITH THIS! I AM NOT OKAY WITH THIS!!"

I cried like a fucking baby, especially at the end of the movie. It was like I knew it was happening, that they were gonna break up, but I was in denial, then when Toothless hugged Hiccup goodbye, I lost it, waterworks all over. In fact, waterworks all the way to the end at their final reunion ugly-cried like a fucking baby.

It did ended perfectly; perfectly bittersweet and perfectly heartbreaking and I was like "This is it. It's official. It's over. My Toothcup ship has fucking sank!!"

Fuck you, DreamWorks, you have killed my bromance!! Gahh!! I hate and love this movie at the same time!

Overall rating:

HTTYD: 9/10

HTTYD2: 7.5/10

HTTYD: 9/10

#httyd #how to train your dragon #hiccup and toothless #movie review #toothcup

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sillyrabbit81 · 3 years

Text

Her Heavy Cross

Summary: Three years after tragedy hits, Lana she decides to start dating again. She meets Will through a dating app and they begin an online romance. After months of constant requests, Lana relents and agrees to meet and go on an irl date with Will. But is Will who he says he is? Lana is quickly pulled into an intense relationship forcing her to confront her tragic past. Will Lana face it or will she close her heart forever?

Pairing: OMC x OFC

Word Count: approx 3.7k

Warnings: Smut, swearing,

Authors Note: The story started as a Henry Cavill fanfiction but I changed it to be an original character, but shades of Henry are still there. Hope you enjoy the story and thanks for reading.

Part 4 Part 6

Part 5

I lived about 40 minutes away from Liam in the suburbs. I still lived in the house Andy and I had bought together, planning to have a family.

I kept thinking about the house on the way there. I remembered being so excited when we found out our offer was accepted. When we moved in a few months later, we did what I assume most young couples do, and we had sex in every room, including the laundry. I had joked that if I got pregnant from the laundry sex, we should call the kid Westinghouse.

After Andy died, I had used his life insurance from his superannuation to pay off the mortgage. I had decided against selling it and moving somewhere smaller. I couldn't do it as it felt like I was abandoning our dream.

When we got home, Liam said, "you live here? I expected you lived in an apartment or something, not a whole house by yourself."

I wasn't meant to be here by myself. I didn't say it, though. I just shrugged, opened the door and said, "You live in a huge place by yourself."

"Yeah, but I didn't pick it. A place to live close to the studio was part of the contract.".

We went in. Perrin came lumbering to the door to greet me and gave Liam a short bark. I scolded Perrin and patted him, telling him Liam was a guest. Liam was unfazed and knelt to pat him and had a chat. "You're just protecting your lady, aren't you, buddy? Well, don't worry, I'll take good care of her." Be still my beating heart.

I took Liam past the bedrooms, pointed out the main bathroom, and went to the open plan kitchen, lounge and dining room. I got out food for Perrin and fed him and found Liam hadn't followed me into the room.

He was in the hallway looking at the pictures on the wall. Well, one in particular. The one of me in my wedding dress, kissing Andy. Oh shit... this was awkward.

I didn't say anything, what could I say?

"I'm sorry." He eventually said. He finally looked at me.

"Why?"

"It must have been awful."

Don't cry! I just nodded.

He pulled me to his chest and held me. "I know you told me what happened when we first started chatting. It didn't really register until I saw this." He pulled back a bit to look at me but still had his arms around me. "Is that why you were so upset last night?" I didn't have to say anything. It must have been written all over my face. Shit.

"Shit," Liam said, echoing my thoughts. He let me go and ran his hand through his curls. They seemed to have dried now. "I'm sorry, I should have realised..."

"No," I interrupted him. "Look, I'd be lying if I said I was over it. I don't think you can ever get over it, but I'm ready to move on. I've been trying to date for a while now. It's just taking that last step and sleeping with someone..." I trailed off. I didn't know how to say what I was thinking without him believing I didn't want him. "I want to be sure it's the right person. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, Sweetheart." Liam pulled me close again. "I'll try to control myself."

"Don't try too hard," I said. "I want you too."

Liam grinned, "You shouldn't have said that." He buried his face into my neck, kissing me and nipping at me until I started to giggle.

He let me go smiling. I said I had better go shower. His eyes widened a moment. "You ok to wait while I do?"

"Don't worry, Sweetheart. I'll have plenty of thoughts to keep me occupied while you're in the shower."

I pretended to be offended, "You're filthy."

"Yes." He said. I ran.

I showered as quickly as possible and got dressed in some leggings and a t-shirt. I went out to find Liam playing on his phone, patting Perrin. He looked up when I came in, and the smile he gave me was so dazzling I stopped for a moment. Gathering myself, I walked over to him and sat on the lounge, not quite close enough to touch him but not out of reach either.

"What should we do today? Do you feel like being lazy, or do you want to go out?" I asked.

Liam hummed a moment. "I think a lazy day would be nice. I won't get many of them soon."

"We could watch a movie?"

Liam agreed. "What do you want to watch?"

"Anything really. Except for romance or a tear-jerker."

"What? Why?"

"I hate crying, and I cry at the drop of a hat. I can't even watch Disney movies without crying. Once I watched Seven Pounds and cried for three days straight." Yeah, I really did. "Plus, I'm an ugly crier." Why, oh, why can't I keep my big mouth shut.

Liam laughed, "I find it hard to believe that you could ever be ugly." And I can't breathe. I think I need an oxygen tank. "Alright, we won't watch a romance."

"Ok, come with me and let's choose. I have a heap of Blu-rays and DVDs. I like director cuts, extended cuts, that kind of thing." I took Liam's hand and tried to pull him off the lounge. He didn't let me. Instead, he pulled me closer until I was standing in front of him.

"Not yet." Liam wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me onto his lap, so I was straddling his glorious thighs. "If we can't watch a romance, maybe we could..." He didn't finish the sentence, which I'm thankful for because I don't think even he could have said anything after that, which wouldn't have been cringe.

Liam's hands slid behind my hips to my bottom, and he gripped me, pulling me closer. Once again, I giggled at his strength. Sometimes I swear I want to slap myself. His hips moved upwards, and I slid further down until I could feel his hardness between my legs. Oh fuck, I don't know how long I can hold out. He put a hand on my neck and pulled my face towards his. His lips met mine. I tried, unsuccessfully, to suppress the moan that came from my throat.

"Fuck," he breathed into my mouth. "When you make noises like that, I just can't stop thinking about what other noises you can make."

I didn't respond, and I just kissed him back. I let my hands trail down his chest, savouring every curvature of his muscles. My hands reached under his shirt, and I felt my way back up his chest.

Although I was travelling blind, my fingers found the spot they were looking for. Liam hissed as my fingers trailed over his nipples. A self-satisfied smile came across my lips. As if in retaliation, he pulled his hands away and held the bottom of my shirt.

"I don't like this shirt. It covers too much." He grinned roguishly. I wasn't going to give in easily.

"But it's a Ramones t-shirt," I complained. "Don't get between Joey and me."

"Joey, huh?"

I nodded, "didn't you know I was a punk rocker?" I stuck my tongue out and did some devils horns.

"Do that again." Liam was grinning at me, so, like an idiot, I did. He whipped the shirt off over my head so quickly I couldn't stop him. I stared down at my chest. My bra was still keeping my modesty in check. I must have had a crazy look of surprise on my face because he laughed at me. "That's better." He said and started kissing the top of my breasts.

I put my hands into his hair, letting him have a small victory while I took mine. His hair was as soft as I thought it would be. Then I curled my hands into fists and pulled, so he had no choice but to pull back and look up at me.

"That was very rude," I said, trying not to smile.

"You loved it." He wasn't wrong.

"Maybe, but it's only fair if..." I trailed off and tugged at his shirt. He leaned forward instantly, and I pulled his shirt off. He was so broad in the chest I felt positively small next to him. I pushed him back against the lounge, well, he let me push him, and I leaned down to kiss his chest. His hair tickled my nose as I travelled my kisses across his chest to his nipple. I kissed it gently before flicking it with my tongue.

"Fuck me," I heard him say. That encouraged me, and I took his nipple in my mouth and gave it a little bite. His whole body jerked in response.

Liam growled, "Fuck it". Suddenly his arm was around my waist and the other under my bum, and he stood up, taking me with him. I squealed and wrapped my legs around his waist. He was stronger than I thought.

"Which one is your bedroom?" Liam asked as he started towards the hall. His eyes held mine, and his blue eyes seemed dark and hungry.

"Second on the left." I should have given my room a clean! Maybe he won't notice if I keep him occupied.

He took me to the door, and I reached behind my back and opened it. He took me in and put me down. He closed the door behind us, and I turned around, looking at my room. Embarrassment crept in.

I had a massive pile of dirty clothes hanging out of my laundry basket and a pile of clean clothes on a chair. My bed was unmade, pillows everywhere. My bedside table was piled with books and had an empty Ben and Jerry's tub on top. Ok, it's bad, but it could have been worse. Then I remembered something, and my eyes flew to the bedside's open draw.

I felt the blood leave my face. It was worse. The last thing I wanted Liam to see was my god damned vibrator. Fuck!

"So, what should we do now?" Liam stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my bare waist. He ran his hands up my side and kissed my neck, nuzzling into me. Although it felt amazing, all I could do was look at the pink silicone sticking out of the draw. I was as still as a statue.

"You're not into this." He stated, his hands dropped, "That's ok, I told you I wouldn't do anything you didn't want to do." I mumbled something, not sure what, and kept thinking about getting to the draw and hiding the vibrator without drawing attention to it.

Liam's voice came out strangled and about an octave higher. "Hide the vibrator?" His voice calmed, and he said, "Damn, Sweetheart. I would have been happy just to feel you up a bit. But if you insist."

I want to die. Liam saw it. I jumped to the draw and slammed it shut. "Umm, I didn't mean for you to see that." I still couldn't look at him.

"I didn't see anything until you said it." Oh. Well, I'm a fucking idiot.

I slowly turned and looked at him. I could see Liam's bloody lip twitching as he tried to hide a shit-eating grin. I wanted to hit him.

"Don't be embarrassed." His voice was deep again, his accent making each word soothing, "I'm not." He came closer to me, his head. He spoke softly in my ear, "I think it's hot as fuck."

I moaned, partly turned on, partly wanting to die. I could feel the heat between my legs grow, and a pleasant tingle radiated through me as I shivered. "No, it's not," I said. Why was I such a prude sometimes? I hid my face in my hands.

Liam didn't attempt to hide his grin. He took my chin in his hand and lifted my face to his. "My rock hard cock disagrees." Oh, Lord, help me.

"Really?" I asked. I hadn't always been like this. Ten years ago, I would have pulled the vibrator out of the draw and put on a show. I knew lots of guys liked to watch a girl orgasm. Just picturing myself doing it now was cringe-inducing.

"Fuck, yes." Liam took my hand. He was gentle and moved slowly as if I were his prey, and any sudden movement would make me bolt. Liam placed my hand on his jeans between his legs. He groaned, and his forehead leaned against mine. "That's what you do to me."

A thrill flowed through me. I wanted to touch him so much. I cupped my fingers around Liam's balls and pressed my palm against him. I moved my palm slowly up, trying to find the end, fuck it was big.

Liam put his hands in my hair and kissed me roughly. I kept moving my palm up and down slowly and firmly against him, my own excitement growing. I was getting so turned on, I lost control for a moment and bit on Liam's lip. Liam growled.

I couldn't stand it anymore; the desire to feel him was too much. I undid his belt. Not wanting to take the time to undo each button, I pulled his jeans apart, each button popping as they came undone. Liam looked down and watched as I slid his jeans down his thighs. I gripped him through his underwear and explored his length. Liam stood there still, watching as my hand moved over the fabric.

It felt so good, but I wanted more. I wanted to hold in my hand what I had glimpsed the night before. I put a hand into his trunks, but before I could touch anything, Liam grabbed my wrist and removed it from his underwear.

"As much as I want this and believe me, I fucking want this. I need to make sure this is what you want." Liam's voice was strained. I looked at his face and could see the effort it took for him to have stopped me. His desire was plain.

"I want it." Liam closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened his eyes, they seemed on fire.

"Tell me exactly what you want."

Please don't make me say it. The shyness was back, or shame, I can't tell. I tried to swallow, but my throat was dry. "I want to touch you," I whispered.

"Tell me where." His voice was hoarse. It was such a fucking turn on.

"I want to touch your cock." I felt his pants move at my words. I looked down and saw the tip almost peeking out of his underwear. I put my hand in and held his shaft gently, and his skin felt soft and velvety. Liam shuddered against me. At that moment, I felt powerful watching this huge man tremble at my touch. I moved my hand.

Liam bucked his hips against my hand, moving slowly at first, but his rhythm increased as did mine. I couldn't stop watching his body move, the muscles in his abs contracting with each thrust, his chest heaving with each ragged breath. It was so fucking erotic.

I felt Liam's hand move over my face, and I looked up and realised he had been watching my face. His thumb moved over my lips. I parted them, and he put his thumb in my mouth. I let my tongue rub over the pad of his thumb and sucked. His eyes went wide, and his hips stuttered. I kept sucking and jerking him, syncing them into the same rhythm.

"Fuck, Lana, stop." I released him slowly and took my hand out of his pants. I let him withdraw his thumb, but I still sucked. It made a slight pop as it left. He leaned into me, catching his breath a moment. I think I nearly made him orgasm. I tried to keep the triumphant smile from my face. I didn't try very hard.

"You're..." Liam was shaking his head. He didn't finish the sentence.

"Terrible Muriel?" I suggested. Way to kill the fucking moment, Lana.

Liam laughed, thank god! "Not what I was going to say." He flopped onto the bed and laid on his back. "Fucking good at that is what I was thinking." He pulled his jeans and shoes off and closed his eyes, his breath slowly returning to normal. I wanted to jump his bones.

Instead, I laid down next to him on my tummy, leaning on my elbows.

Part 6

#original character #original fiction #romantic story

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red-rose-9072 · 3 years

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Hi there! I'm still new to Tumblr and this is my first fic here. Note I am still a rookie at this , so my grammar kinda sucks and I did this at like 11 at night when I should be sleeping. Hope you enjoy this!❤️💜

• • •

The audience was full of life , chanting the K/DA fanchant over and over again until it became like a song to her. Light sticks flashed in an ocean of colours , illuminating the stage with bright light that became one with the small silver dots in the sky.

She was nervous...

Excited...

Anxious...

Maybe all in one? Who wouldn't be?

Ahri was sitting on one of the chairs in the backstage lounge , her hair and make up done and now she just had to wait for the girls to get ready and start the show. She has done many shows and live performances , but this one feels ... Different.

Ahri cast her blue gaze to Kai'sa , the young dancer was stretching and warming her muscles up for the performance. Her hair tied into a high ponytail and her crystal wings floating behind her back. Ahri loved watching her dance , Kai'sa looks like a graceful butterfly when she is dancing and her wings hover behind her in every move. Like she was in another world , in her own world when she hears the music and dances her heart out.

Akali was talking to Evelyyn on the couch opposite her , both seemed deep in conversation to know the fox was looking at them. Akali , the youngest (and cutest) member of K/DA somehow was an acception to Evelyyn. Eve was the diva of the group , the girl who doesn't take no for an answer , who likes to make fans drop dead when she walks by. But under all that , she is Evelyyn , the warm hearted friend who helped her when she was a soloist and the group's unnie.

Akali and Eve get along with eachother pretty well , the fandom is crazy over them. When Akali joined K/DA , Evelyyn immediately started treating her like she was her baby.

Ahri smiled softly at the two , Eve being a softie to their maknae was something that can melt anyone's heart. She remembers when she was young like Akali , full of wonder , ambition , pride and excitement. Always eager to show off her skills to other artists and dazzling others with her talent and beauty. The difference was that Akali had three older members to look up to , while Ahri had to peruse her dreams on her own.

There was a small giggle coming from across the room , so Ahri looked at the source of the giggle and saw Seraphine. The blue haired girl was talking to the make-up artist , smiling sweetly and blushing when the make-up artist complemented her. Seraphine was so young , yet held so much talent and so much potential. Blades immediately fell in love with her , Ahri often sees Tweets of fans completing Seraphine. However , not many fans agree with the Chinese singer , saying that she should song Korean and not Chinese because K/DA was a Kpop group.

Ahri advised Seraphine to ignore those comments and look at the positive ones. I mean , Chinese in a Korean song isn't that bad (right?).

Ahri saw her younger self in Seraphine. She has never felt this close to a fan before , and Seraphine was a huge fan of Ahri , once she came to visit her and the songstress and to quickly stash all her posters and drawings of Ahri under her bed. She found it cute , how she gets flustered when Ahri would talk to her or simply touch her.

She was snapped back to reality when Kai'sa sat next to her. "Daydreaming?", The dancer asked. Ahri shook her head and cleared her throat like a profession. "No , just simply looking at my band mates", she said. Kai'sa gave her a smile and patted her back , she than gave a content sigh. "Blades sound beautiful when they say our fanchant , don't they?", She asked. Ahri nodded , feeling her heart spring in joy at how happy they sounded.

"You seem nervous darling , something wrong?", came Evelynn's voice. Ahri sighed and her shoulders tenses up , she looked at the amber eyed singer. "How did you know?", she asked to which Eve chuckled. She than pointed to her crystal tail that was curled up besides her. "Your tail is all twitchy , like a fox worrying about loosing its prey", she said. Ahri groaned and silently cursed Eve for knowing her so well , how was she that good?

Akali sat up and leaned over so her elbows where resting on her legs and her back hunched , azure eyes meeting hers. "It's ok to feel nervous , unnie. From a leader's point of view , I worry whether my band mates will give a stunning performance or trip on their own feet".

"Huh? Your a leader?"

"True Damage , hello?"

"Oh yea , forgot about that , haha"

Akali smiled and giggled , her eyes crinkling. "Nah , it's ok. A lot of people still sees me as K/DA's small and cute baby , ignoring the fact that I lead my own group", Akali said. Evelyyn wrapped her arms around her waist. "Aw , but you're too small to be leader", Evelynn joked and Akali lightly hit her arm. "Yah! I'm taller than Ekko! Kid can't even reach the top shelf".

Ahri rolled her eyes. "Neither can you", she said and Kai'sa threw her head back to laugh , that weird laugh that everyone has grown used to by now.

Seraphine made her way to them , Ahri patted the spot next to her and she sat next to her. Ahri smiled and let her tail rest on her lap , Sera's cheeks tinted a bright pink and she couldn't help but giggle at her. "Your so cute", she teased and Seraphine pouted.

"Five more minutes than were live , ladies!"

Now the butterflies was fluttering madly in her stomach. She has never felt so nervous before , only that time when she debuted. If her past self could look at her now , she would wonder how she made here.

"I'm nervous , you guys?", Seraphine asked. Kai'sa nodded in agreement while Akali waves her off. "Nervous? Never heard of her", she said with swag. Eve rose her brow at the rapper before shrugging. Ahri sighed and fiddled with her fingers , ok , she got this. No , they got this. K/DA has got this.

• • •

"I'll show you what I'm made of

rise to the occasion

got fears but I face them , oh , oh..."

Ahri sang her song over her mic , smiling in happiness at how she saw the happy faces and how they sand along with her. Some mumbling gibberish when the Korean parts came , but she was too happy to care about their pronunciation.

The rest of the group was dancing around and having fun while jamming to her song , Evelynn and Seraphine adding vocals here and there , while Kai'sa and Akali danced together. Smiling , laughing , singing along and having fun.

When the song came to an end , the audience cheered and K/DA hurried to the centre. Ahri gave a friendly wave to Blades and started talking over the mic. "First of all , I would like to thank all of you for coming to our show. It means the world to us , to have our fans all in one place to listen to our songs and sing along. I am also very grateful for all the hard work the staff has put in this performance , and for all the love and support we received even in POP/STARS era". The audience cheered and several 'awws' could be heard.

Ahri than held Kai'sa's hand , who was he closest to her , and smiled at her group. "Secondly , I would like to thank my band mates for being here with me. All my life , I've been chasing my dream on my own , but now I have four amazing sisters to share the spotlight with me. You taught me so much , and I've learnt a lot from you. As a leader , I am so proud of all of you".

The audience went wild when Akali hugged Ahri from behind and Kai'sa wiped her eyes. Evelynn smiled and embraced the gumiho and soon Seraphine joined in and Kai'sa too , trying to control her tears. Ahri would have cried too , those sentences didn't seem enough to her , but to them it was more than enough. It was everything.

Ahri laughed and turned to Eve , a smirk on her lips. "Any messages to Blades?".

"Don't let anybody with bad eyebrows tell you look ugly", she said. There was a string of laughter and applauses , Akali leaned into the mic with a goofy smile on her face. "And if anybody says K/DA or Blades sucks , tell them to fu-", Kai'sa covered Akali's mouth before she could curse live at their performance. Akali shrugged , not looking guilty.

Ahri smiled and turned back to the audience. A sea of smiling faces and lights. "From us K/DA , thank you for attending our show. Keep shining my stars and we love you all!". She said and she blew a kiss to the audience.

This where she belonged. With her members and her fans underneath the stars , and for once , she felt like she finally accomplished her dream. But it was far from done.

#K/DA #League of legends #ahri #Evelynn #Kai'sa #Akali #Seraphine #i did this instead of sleeping

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theoutermenace1986 · 5 years

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I know I said that I would keep this as spoiler free as I possibly could....but I really can't help it in this case.

Endgame wrecked me.

It wrecked me in a lot of ways, but one particular way literally caused me to break down to the point of clinging to my best friend and openly sobbing.

You may think to yourself "Why is some 33 something nerd crying over a fictional character?"

Because Tony Stark was the hero I needed during one of the darkest moments of my life. And Robert Downey Jr - both in portrayal and in his own personal life - actually helped me pull through.

I had suffered some trauma in my youth that never really went away. I'd always been brought up strong, independent, and able to resolve things on my own. I have loving parents, a great sister, and a handful of close friends.

That didn't stop the bullying from my peers from making me feel ugly and worthless.

That didn't stop teachers from telling me I wasn't going anywhere because I was willing to question.

I had people telling me I couldn't - so I did out of spite.

College came. Relationships happened. Adulthood hit. And even when you think that you have it great - that's not always the case. Sometimes shit just happens.

Depression got worse. I felt like I burdened people by talking about my problems, so I clammed up. I started smoking more (mainly in social situations, but still...going through a pack of cloves within a few days isn't a good thing). And when the smoking failed, I turned to alcohol.

I. Hit. Rock. Bottom.

I would go out and just drink to forget everything. Even the good stuff. I just wanted to be numb for a while. And for a while, it felt great.

Until I realized the toll it had on my friends - namely my best friend.

She noticed the self destructive patterns and started getting on my case. I insisted I was fine even when I wasn't. The final straw was when I was so drunk that I couldn't even get into the house. Barely conscious and delirious. My best friend got me into bed and woke me every 2 hours or so just to make sure I was still alive. I couldn't even remember how much I drank let alone what. She drew an ice bath and threw me in.

I was 22 at this point. Having just celebrated my birthday. April 9, 2008.

After a long talk because I admitted to my best friend that I needed help (yes. I was cognizant enough to know I needed help even when I was destroying myself from the inside out and let me tell you .... it is A TERRIBLE FEELING), she suggested finding other hobbies to take up my time as opposed to drinking myself into a stupor or worse.

And wouldn't you know it - I saw the Iron Man trailer while cruising through Facebook.

There was my boy, RDJ, looking amazing as all hell...and playing a superhero. Best of all, he was playing a personal favorite of mine - Tony Stark.

Poetic, right?

So we go to see it. Enjoyed every minute of it. We laughed. We cried. We fell in love with Tony all over again. So much that I immediately decided to get back into cosplay:

I literally built that reactor in my cave of a room with a candy tin, computer wires, electrical tape, and stainless steel coils that I had in a box from my prop making days.

My friends never let me live THAT down.

I had never felt more alive, more happy, and more myself in literally years. I was only a month off the sauce in this pic (and trust me, the next pictures I don't look quite so ill)

It's amazing what motivation will do no matter what the source.

So for the next 11 years I followed the journey. Ups and downs, losses and wins...didn't matter because my boy Tony always got out on top.

Then Endgame happened.

I called it the moment they showed his family.

I knew it was coming the moment he said he'd found the method for time travel.

I knew it the moment he looked at Peter's picture.

This was it.

And I can't tell you how much I both loved and hated the inevitable outcome of all his heroics.

On the one hand - he went out a hero. He went out the way he should have - protecting everyone he loved and ensuring a safer world for them. He was surrounded by his loved ones and mourned by all who knew him. It was impactful, it had meaning, and it was everything.

But kn the other hand- I'm angry. I'm pissed as hell that his happy ending - the one we fans have been praying for him to have - was thrown away in the most cruel and crushing way. He had a wife. He had a daughter. He had everything he'd ever wanted. But we just couldn't see him be a happy man; we couldn't see him retire and live a life that he deserved.

I wanted Tony Stark to find the same happiness I eventually did. I wanted him to find the peace I have both with myself and with my partner, my best friends, and my family.

The carpet was laid out....the torn right out from under him.

I'm normally not this bitter over a character death. We all die eventually. But I see it too often that characters like Tony - who work so hard to be the best people they can be, suffer multiple traumas, unhappiness, and stress while trying to do right - always get killed.

I'm at least glad he at least went out on his own terms.

So, thank you, Tony Stark. Thank you for being my hero. Thank you for making me fall back in love with Marvel. Thank you for saving my life.

And thank you, Robert Downey Jr, for reminding me that we can overcome even at our lowest moments. You're an icon, a legend, and you brought my hero to life in a way that changed my life for the better. I hope to see your future projects soon, but I'll miss the life, love, and dedication you brought to the MCU.

#avengers endgame #endgame spoilers #spoilers #tony stark #robert downey jr #tony stark fan for life

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ae-diaries · 5 years

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My Life Testimony

Warning: Long post ahead

The content of this blog has me holding a secret I've kept hidden for a long time. I'm a bit hesitant to share my personal story because others (who knew me already) may be shocked or turned off 😅, but hopefully, the thoughts would bless someone and help you face your weaknesses and rise above them. This is a celebration of the greatest miracle I received from God. I never thought that miracle was real, until circumstances proved that it is possible.

Foremost in my mind is when I was a high school kid. My life was symbolized by the microphone; I’d been exposed to sing in front of a crowd, be it in school or amateur singing contests. It's not to boast but it felt like I was a singing sensation back then, others dubbed me as 'songbird', 'sweet nightingale' to name a few 🤣. But when no one's looking, I felt, for lack of a better description, just off. This was caused by a certain physical condition that tear down my self-image.

It all began when my mother noticed that I had an uneven shoulders when I was 13 years old. Later on, I was diagnosed with scoliosis measuring a 20-degree curve, and so my doctor from PGH gave me various stretching exercises and required me to wear a brace to prevent the curve from worsening or else surgery awaits me.

I freaked out inside. At the back of my mind, I wondered, “Why me?”. From then on, a hidden scar symbolizes my 'private' life. People might not notice it, but really I was riddled with inferiority complex and lack of self-worth. Nakakaiyak isipin, imagine ako lang bukod tanging estudyante sa private skul na may ganitong klaseng kundisyon. How I pitied myself. Parang ayoko nang lumabas. Hiyang hiya ako.

I usually cried and pahirapan pa every time my mother would be putting the brace into my body, kabilinbilinan niya wag ko daw aalisin para daw mapabilis paggaling ko, but there was this one time, while I was on my way to school, naisipan kong dumaan muna sa haus ng classmate ko para lang ipatago yung brace ko. And it happened many times. Ang bigat nyang dalhin, di lang sa katawan kundi pati narin sa kalooban. Later on, they found out what I was doing, until wala na silang nagawa sa tigas ng ulo ko. Fortunately, my classmates did not bully me in school; however, I was still very conscious and afraid that my crush would see me like a bionic kid. To this day, I have never told my parents about this reason. You know as a teenager, I was overly sensitive by the opinion of others. And that's all that matters to me. I didn't think of the consequences of this action.

Fast forward to 2012, sabi nila end of the world na this year (according to Mayan calendar), feeling ko katapusan ko nadin when I went back to the doctor and learned that the deformity progressed to over 50 degrees. Reality finally hit me! A major surgery was needed to correct my S-curved spine. Why I didn't just wear that darn thing? I must admit nagpabaya ako as I was trying to live like a normal kid. At that time, I was already employed in my first job so I filed for a two-month leave. Luckily, my very understanding boss approved it. I also had an amazing orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Teodoro Castro, who explained to me the procedure (though it was as clear as mud to me). He was very reassuring, so I didn't get scared.

And when he asked, "Kelan mo gusto magpa-opera?," Without a second thought, I replied, "Kahit po bukas na doc!". My thoughts were, "If not now, when pa?"( I felt like I was running out of time.) His eyes bulged upon hearing my immediate response! And so he set the schedule to May 16, 1 p.m (which I spent at Sta. Teresita General Hospital in Quezon City).

It was exciting, really, though it had 'Final Destination' feels. Andaming 'what ifs', what if di ako maka-survive? Bigla kong naisip talagang 'life is short' at ang dami ko pa palang di nagagawa sa mundong ibabaw such as makapag-serve kay God through joining a spiritual ministry, to travel for a cause, makapag-abroad, makakanta sa tv, makita si Regine & Sarah, magamit license ko to teach students, maigala ang magulang ko, and to have my own family. Sana magawa ko pa ang mga ito after post-op.

More so, I felt my family's collective fear; I could actually hear the loud beating of my parents' chest when they signed the waiver 🤣. My father had worries that my voice might deteriorate after the operation. Laying in my bed and knowing that I may be that close to dying, I delivered my prayer of surrender to God and remained fearless. The comforting lyrics of 'You made me Stronger' by Kelly Clarkson became my fight song while in the hospital.

Waking up after the operation was the highlight. Being groggy from the anesthesia, I opened my eyes, feeling like it's just a continuation of my short sleep. I saw the nurses and my family - patiently waiting for me to wake up for almost 6 hours na daw. The first thing I asked was, "Tapos na?" (many times). I felt a huge sigh of relief when they uttered the words that struck me to the core, "Oo, tapos na." S*** I couldn't believe my ears; I was flying with joy! For years I have prayed for this miracle. I wanted to shout and do any dance challenge, 🤣 but how could I do that? They were preventing me from talking yet or make any movements because a mask was surrounding my nose and a lot of apparatuses were attached to my body. Later on, I learned that my younger brother cried after seeing me survived the operation. May kadramahan din pala si brother na lagi kong kabangayan 😂. While the success of my operation wouldn't be possible if it weren't for the assistance provided by my father's company, DMCI Corp. That's why I'll always be indebted to their big boss, VAC (May his soul rest in peace).

My healing lasted for almost nine months. I never suffered from complications, just pure torture and regrets na sana di nalang ako nagpa-opera (huhu). This is no exaggeration but dinaig ko pa talaga ang na-cesarean. On the first month after my operation, I became disabled and reached levels of pain I thought never existed in human experience: It was difficult to breath; I could not stand and walk on my own; I became excessively skinny because of drug intake - this was a legal drug prescribed by my doctor which can remove the pain only for 4-6 hrs. It felt so pathetic and frustrating to see myself in front of the mirror. No matter how much I tried to be positive, my insecurities gripped me down again and again to the point of questioning God: "Is there a hope for me?",

"How come others could breathe and walk so well? During these times, inggit na inggit ako sa mga taong nakakalakad at nakakahinga ng maluwag. Feeling ko life is so unfair. Somewhere deep inside, I believed I was ugly, that He really didn't like me and it was His punishment for all the sins I did in the past. As I poured out my grief before God, a question popped in my head: “Mira, give me reasons why you should remain grateful?.”

“Seriously, how can I be grateful in times like this?.”

But in those agonizing moments, a light of hope from my parents’ eyes illuminates my darkness.

In all the times that I cried and complained, I never saw them get too tired to feed me or serve me even if it would make them uncomfortable to make me comfortable. I couldn't imagine how they felt when I looked down on myself. Aside from my parents, my siblings, concerned relatives and genuine friends also never left my side. It's as if they became my extra pair of legs when mine refuse to walk. And my heart is full of gratitude today because they have loved me during the times that I didn't love myself.

I'm living a normal life now as if nothing happened but others observed that except for my angelic voice 🤣, I tend to become forgetful and a little bit of deaf (Yes to this level) - this was probably caused by my extra dose of antibiotics intake 🤣. They noticed that I walk with lightning speed, as if may hinahabol daw ako lagi - maybe subconsciously, this has something to do with my life goals. Yes, I do get tired easier that's why there are some things that I must not do such as lifting heavy objects, sport activities (except for swimming), washing a mountain of clothes 🤣, bawal ma-stress and ma-exposed sa extreme cold places 😅.

As they say, true wisdom is learning from your shortcomings. For everything that I'd been through, I realized that there's a lesson hidden underneath the pain and it was God's way for me to:

(1) strengthen my faith - It was through this difficult times that I also underwent a 'spiritual surgery/enlightenment'. It has helped me find my stride in God and pray like I have never prayed before (for I know nakalimot ako). I didn't know all His plans but surely He was turning my brokenness into greatness.

(2) love myself, invest in my relationships and create good memories - The whole discernment gave me the courage to keep progressing. I began to accept my imperfections, pick up my self-esteem, and do the things I haven't done before: Much is to be done but so far, I already saw Miss Regine and Sarah in person, traveled to different places, got to teach students in schools, treat my parents - brought them to concerts and resto; spent midnight snacks and watched movies with my siblings; hang-out with friends; reunited with a long lost friend; restored a broken relationship, and tried to forgive someone;

(3) appreciate the fine details of life - More and more, my wishes become simpler. I realized there is more to life than any material thing could give, and that is getting enough oxygen and optimal healing to every organ in my body. Sobra kong na-appreciate ang buhay ko, especially the air I breathe, and the legs that carry me everywhere.

Eto lang sapat na 'to be happy'. Why did I fail to notice this before? And that's also what I want to ask you, when was the last time you were thankful for the air around you? True to what they say, the best things in life are free, but the problem is we're not contented with what we have and complicate rules to experiencing happiness: “I will be happy only if I’ll be able to upgrade my phone, buy a latest collection of chanel bag, wear a new pair of sketchers shoes..” And I'm so guilty of it because I once was a shoppaholic before that I forgot to remember how 'enough' I truly have.

As I look back, hagulhol nako sa iyak - there were tears in my eyes, but they were no longer tears of pain but tears of gratitude - thinking how would I survive without the amazing people in my life.

I believe that God wants me to write this article so that I could speak for Him and claim that today, I can go out without any worries because I'm no longer ashamed of the scar life has left me with. It's a blessing in disguise; a sign that I conquered pain and fear. Wala na sigurong pagsubok na di ko kakayanin dahil kinaya ko na yung 'pinakamahirap' because truly, life is about not giving up and trying to fix yourself up after every fall.

I cannot make the scar disappear but by looking at it, I see a testimony of survival, inner strength and God's miracles. Jesus never said it wouldn't be easy, but He said it would be worth it! - Matt. 7:13

#secondlife #lifetestimony #embracingmyscar

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pastelraes-blog · 5 years

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Bitch Why Are You Like This: meeting Miss & Daddy (Jan 22)

A picture of me looking at me during the entire evening.

Starring: Daddy, Miss and a bitch (that's me!)

i've been thinking about my meeting with Miss and Daddy. Before that very moment, i have never felt young. Truly young - innocent, energetic, inexperienced, requiring guidance, in-over-my-head. Ever. Welcome to childhood, bitch.

Miss is fucking amazing. Although intense, she embodies the person i want to be. There's a quiet strength about her, a self-assurance, and she's beautiful. When the hostess pointed her out, i was quite sure i'd die before ever reaching the table. But here i am. Still living. While sitting at the table i marveled at how blessed i felt. Do i know what the fuck i'm doing? No. Do i know what i'm getting myself into? Hell no. But i trust in the experience Miss has, her thorough questioning, and deliberate actions.

For a moment, i wondered about sex trafficking. Atlanta is the sex trafficking hub of the nation, and to get women, sex traffickers often recruit other women. Because girls/women feel safer with and trust women more than men. With reason. But i requested to see and talk to her and Daddy was kind enough to let that happen.

And then in comes Daddy. i doubted He was real but He sure as fuck is, and boy do i feel little. It's not something i've ever experienced in my life. And i like it a lot (question mark?). i was pretty sure i was going to fuck some shit up and fuck some shit up i did. He told me to ask Him a question. i didn't feel i deserved to ask a question and quite frankly i was suffering from slight sensory overload and i didn't have a question to ask. Every question i had left my mind the moment He asked. Somehow, i found one - something about my age. i don't remember what i asked or His answer. i do remember getting comfortable and asking another question. He leans forward and says, "What part of one question do you not understand?" and i respond, "the one part." 🤦🏽‍♂️ Internally, i was yelling at myself to shut the fuck up.

And then He looked at me.

He looked *into* me

and i fell

When i was 4 or 5 or 6 (who the fuck knows honestly) my mother took me and my sister (who was 2 or 3 or 4) to a pool. i could somewhat swim but knew i should never cross 4 feet deep. Keeping this in mind, i jumped in the pool. And then i started drowning; the '4 feet' pool marker was missing and i thought i was jumping into 3 feet water. As i drowned, there was no panic. i felt no discomfort. i remember being surrounded by light blue waves. Looking up to see the sun shining through the water. i was at peace. There was no sound, there was no disturbance. And then i closed my eyes.

And when i opened them i was staring into Daddy's.

*still*

There's a common descriptor phrase - looking like a deer in headlights - and i have had the terribly unfortunate opportunity to witness this in reality in the passenger seat of my grandfather's jeep speeding toward a deer at 50 miles per hour.

and i am the deer

and the deer is me

drowning in water

over four feet deep

with eyes staring into Daddy's

Eventually i look away. And to mask my terror - that i could feel the depth of those experiences, i do the worst possible thing i could do in the moment: i look back at him defiantly & *i get smug*. And when i return my attention to Miss, i am smiling. Daddy asks Miss if i have signed the waiver yet and he says to get that done *as soon as possible*

A bitch is in trouble .

Should i be terrified for my life? Should i try to suck His ****? Who knows 🤷🏾‍♂️ (lxlzkzkzjkzjzb why am i like this! 😳🤣). Fuck Twilight AND ESPECIALLY fuck its fanfic 50 Shades, but Bella. Sweetie. If this is how you felt when Eddy-boy stared at you, i understand and im sorry for ever doubting you.

The night goes on. Daddy pours his coffee in a very particular manner. i am very thankful for Miss. They work well together. A perfect balance. She asks about me staring down Daddy and asks if i wanted to or felt like i should look away. Hell yeah i wanted to look away. i felt like i should look away. i wanted desperately to look away. i couldn't. And then it felt like maybe i shouldn't look away? Like what was this Man thinking i wondered. And when i caught myself looking i realized i kinda didn't want to stop? A bitch is a brat. Why do i poke the Lion? i don't knoooww 😭. Miss says she can't imagine me being submissive and that hurts a lot.

And of course in typical fashion of one who emotes (?) dramatically, i begin to cry. Because being smug is a defense mechanism. Bucking authority is another. i have had to puff myself up and build up walls and be hard for so long to *survive* and i don't want to be like that anymore. It's not me. i didn't have a childhood. i've always felt impossibly old. At 10, i raised my siblings for four years while momma went to college. because making 6k a year aint shit with 4 kids. At 14 when she finished, she wanted her role and her power back, but the children didn't recognize her as momma. And she hated it. It was a constant power struggle. To me she was irrational, led by the heart and prone to overreaction. Her favorite punishment aside from capital punishment was to take away everything i cared about at any moment *because she could*. So i became smug. *Because fuck you.*

Fast forward 4 years when i finally get to college and shit aint much better. i'm in an environment i wasn't ready for academically. The learning curve was exponential with a slope asymptote to infinity (undefined). That joint is a straight line lol. People are mad racist, dudes are mad sexist, the black people super rich and i'm slipping into depression. When i took a break from school last semester, i learned the traits i picked up - the way i operate in groups/the constant fight - don't work in other environments. It's dangerous to myself and it hurts others. And i don't want to be like that anymore. this is what i've had to do to survive all my life and it's ugly and it's not me.

i'm done with surviving. i want to thrive. i want to *live*. i want to submit desperately, i just don't know how. i'm tired of being defiant and smug and provoking because it's not me. i care so deeply for people, and i struggle because my face, my words, and my attitude are incongruent. When shit is bad, and i mean real bad, i smile and laugh. Not because something is funny or amusing - i smile because it isn't. i guess i started smiling cuz that's much simpler than bursting into tears. And these behaviors are habits i desperately want to break. my life has been fight after fight and resistance and war. i've made it so i would not submit to the negative forces in my life, but now i don't know how to accept the good. and that's why it hurts me so much when i smile at Miss or stare down Daddy when i would truly love not to be.

i was sure after that fiasco i'd never hear from them again. i failed so epically at something i know myself to be. regardless of the tears (because i definitely cried more last night), i am so thankful for that one opportunity to be in the presence of Miss and Daddy. The experience allowed me to gaze intently at those very ugly behaviors that i didnt truly recognize until last night. i left feeling like i failed a lot. But that failure was good because it was necessary. i'm now one step closer to knowing the person i am and transforming into the person i want to be.

Miss told me to look up what submission means and give ten examples of when i have ever done that in my life. For a moment i was quite terrified because i don't think i have ever submitted to someone or something without resistance first.

Submission - the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person; an act of surrendering to a hold by one's opponent; humility; meekness

Okay the '10 examples' activity is super hard because i see now i've been the bitch reluctant to listen and follow. people must loved me to put up with this shit. Jesus take the wheel.

i still don't think i'm off the hook. i live on the hook. i am the worm 😂. i'm super disappointed in myself, but my love for myself has not changed. i'm really proud of myself for taking the chance and putting myself out there and meeting people who i fantasize about binding me, dragging keys down my back until i bleed, whipping my *****, leaving marks/bruises and other normal shit like calling me hideous degrading names and looking at me in ways that make my entire being quiver. If we're being 300,000% truthful, though i didn't intend to fuck up, the intensity of those moments, the acute embarrassment i felt, the topic of conversation in that public environment is something i truly enjoyed and if given the chance to experience it again i definitely would. ☺️

Eventually i'll ask Miss about her role because she's Daddy's sub but i have to pass her first to get to Daddy. Does that mean one day she's going to hand me off and i don't get to have her as Miss anymore 😢? i'm going to enjoy things as they are and take them as they come. Because i like Daddy & Miss a lot 🤷🏾‍♂️

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mind-reader1 · 6 years

Text

Queen of Hearts (Ch.17)

Drake x MC (Emma Barnes)

TRR AU: What would happen if Emma loved Drake but had to marry Liam?

Catch up here

Warnings: Some cursing

Note: Enjoy! Let me know if you’d like to be added/removed to the tag list. This chapter is short, but there will be some juuuuuicy NSFW coming Saturday or Sunday.

Word Count: 2490

Summary: It’s the night of the costume ball, but it’s not a ball without some drama! Neville challenges Drake to a duel, a mysterious woman in red makes an appearance at court with veiled threats.

Chapter 17: Ours - Taylor Swift

Seems like there's always Someone who disapproves, They'll judge it like they know about me and you, And the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do, The jury's out, And my choice is you.

So don't you worry your pretty little mind, People throw rocks at things that shine, And life makes love look hard, The stakes are high, The waters rough, But this love is ours,

And it's not theirs to speculate, If it's wrong and, Your hands are tough but they are where, My belong in, I'll fight their doubt and give you faith with this song for you.

“Your dress is magnifique!” Kiara and Penelope came up to the group followed by Madeleine as they all waited to be heralded. Emma was going to answer, but Kiara had already turned on Drake, her eyes raking up and down his body.

“I like this noble look on you Drake.” Emma rolled her eyes. She was starting to think there was only room at court for one bird sigil. Drake cleared his throat awkwardly and practically shoved Maxwell between him and Kiara. Everyone made idle chit chat before it was time to enter.

“Are you ready?” Liam whispered down to Emma. It would be their first time announced at court together, in fact it was her first time being announced to court at all, and it couldn't be with the one person she wanted most. She swallowed hard and nodded.

“Duchess Emma Barnes of Valtoria and his Majesty King Liam!” All eyes turned to them and Emma forced a smile as they descended the stairs.

“This is our first time back at the palace, how are you doing?” Emma couldn't lie she was a little jittery.

“I'll be okay. I'm just worried about you and Drake.” Liam gave her a reassuring smile and watched as their friends were announced by the herald, Constantine and Regina going last.

“I'm okay. Something about Drake is different today, he seems...happier.” Emma nodded, she had noticed it too.

“I wonder if Kiara has anything to do with it.” Liam teased, Emma didn't find it that funny. She swiftly hit Liam, scowling, before anyone could notice.

“Not funny Liam.”

“Got it. Excuse me.” He walked into the middle of the crowd, the conversation stopping as they waited for his speech. He addressed the attack and thanked everyone for being there before Constantine gave a speech, gushing about how he met Regina at a costume ball years ago. Constantine then dragged Liam away and Emma made her rounds until the band began to play. Liam approached her and bowed.

“May I have this dance?” Emma took his outstretched hand and followed him onto the dance floor. As she and Liam spun, she watched as Drake desperately tried to find someone to dance with, the only woman left was Kiara who was eager to see Drake's moves.

“Is there a way we can get rid of Kiara?” Emma muttered.

“No, besides we need all the nobles we can get. I wanted to thank you for your support at the hospital earlier, it really meant a lot to me.” Emma gave him a quick smile.

“I'm working on being a better friend, it seems like you are too.” He nodded, and they suddenly heard a commotion. Looking over they saw that Neville and Drake had collided on the dance floor.

“Walker, I hardly recognized you in that horrendous…thing you're wearing.” Drake rolled his eyes, but Emma had heard enough.

“Where’d you buy that ugly thing? The Goodwill reject box?” A chuckle rippled through the small group that was gathered.

“It's Armani! It probably costs more than your entire Royal wannabe wardrobe.” Neville sneered at both of them, not caring that Emma was the future queen.

“You can dress the peasant up all you'd like, but he'll never fit in! He'll always be the one that everyone pities! Only around to serve as the King's lapdog. He’ll never enjoy things such as this English waltz.” Liam grabbed Emma's wrist before she could lunge at Neville, she ripped her hand away and stared at him in disbelief. She couldn't believe that he was letting someone talk about his best friend like that. Emma was hoping that Drake would punch him, but instead he let Neville turn back to his date.

“Actually, it's a Viennese waltz and you're jumping in on the wrong beat.” A large crowd had now gathered around them and all “oohed” at Drake's insult. Neville was floored, he had never made such a mistake. Drake turned, and Emma saw the smirk on his face. She ran up beside him and threw her arms around him in a hug, before remembering they were in public and taking a step back.

“That was amazing Drake. I've never been prouder of you.”

“You'll never be one of us! You don't know how not to behave like a caveman!”

“Oh really? The man who trips over his own feet and picks fights for the hell of it is calling me a caveman?” the crowd around them began to laugh, some even clapped as Neville looked beside himself.

“I've had enough!” Neville pulled out a white glove and threw it at Drake's feet.

“I, Lord Neville Vancoeur, demand that you meet me in a duel.” Everyone around them gasped, Emma looked to Liam.

“There hasn't been an honor duel in over 100 years.” Emma's mind was flooded with questions, the biggest, what did that mean for Drake.

“I accept.” Drake picked up the glove and glared at Neville.

“Drake!” He met Emma's gaze, both of them holding it a little too long, others beginning to notice.

“Go get him Drake.” He nodded and turned back to Neville. As word of the duel spread though the ballroom, a mysterious woman with red hair and a red dress entered the room, excited for the duel. Emma wasn't sure, but she thought the woman was a Nevrakis. Neither of the men moved though, they stared at each other sneering.

“Are we going to duel or not?”

“To the field.” As they walked out, Emma was right by Drake's side.

“Drake is going to make you wish that you never returned to the palace you pompous ass!”

“Thanks Barnes.” Neville scoffed.

“I'm far more prepared for this than my opponent.” Outside, nobles gathered, whispering with excitement as Emma and her friends crowded around Drake.

“You took a bullet Drake, you can do this.” The first thing Liam had said about the duel all night.

“Guess all the mock duels we had as kids will pay off.” He chuckled nervously. Hana and Maxwell shared words of encouragement with him, even Madeleine came over though she was all about the political angle it would create. He turned to Emma last, she wanted to reach out and kiss him, ask him why he had done it, but she knew. He was finally standing up to all the nobles who thought he would never be good enough, who looked down on commoners.

“Take this, for good luck and be careful.” Emma gave him an extra piece of fabric from her costume, it was the best she could do in front of everyone, but it meant the world to Drake.

“You got it Barnes.”

“Let's begin Mr. Walker!” Neville taunted waving his sword around in a flashy manner. Emma gulped when she saw just how sharp they were. Neville took the first swing, Drake was barely able to deflect. Taking advantage of Drake's offset balance, Neville swung for his head and Drake ducked. Emma latched onto Liam's arm squeezing tight, she hoped Drake would take his own advice about playing dirty because Neville clearly wasn't going to fight with the honor that he claimed to have.

“Do you want to know what I despise most about you commoners.” He said, as if the word itself left a bad taste in his mouth.

“You're going to tell me either way so just get it over with.” Neville struck, and Drake parried.

“That you have no respect for those who are clearly better than you.” He struck again, and Drake barely dodged it.

“I have plenty of respect for those who are better than me, but you'll never be one of them!” Drake lunged, the force sending Neville stumbling back towards the crowd.

“Brute strength, just what I expected from a caveman!” Neville slashed forward with speed catching Drake off guard. He cut through Drake's side, a gash pouring blood out over his coat. Drake gasped.

“Drake!” Emma tried to run forward, but Liam held her back.

“He's hurt, you must stop this duel!” Hana pleaded with anyone who would listen around her.

“Nonsense. Drake needs to lose much more blood before he can stop fighting.” Emma's head was spinning, Drake had gotten hurt again, her mind flashed to the homecoming ball. Neville went after Drake who dove out of the way, scrambling to find his sword.

“Get up Drake.” Emma chanted under her breath.

“There's no excuse for lying around while your head is still attached Walker!” Olivia yelled out. He found his sword before Neville could strike again and they traded parries until Neville saw an opening, yanking Drake's wounded arm into an unnatural position. Drake cried out in pain again, falling to his knees. Neville raised his sword over Drake's head, Emma was afraid she might faint, her knees growing weaker as she clung onto Liam for support like her life depended on it.

“Let this be a lesson to you and that gold digging, commoner whore our king is marrying, you will always end up in your rightful place... in the dirt, kissing my shoes.” Emma was suddenly furious, Neville had just called her a gold digging whore and Liam stood there stoic, watching as his best friend bled at the hands of Neville.

“What do you have to say for yourself now?”

“Get up Drake! Get up!” Emma screeched falling to her knees beside him.

“He doesn't know a single fucking thing about us! Put him in his place! Show him how Americans do it!” Drake locked eyes with Emma, a newfound fury in them. Neville had called the woman he loved a gold digging whore, he was going to pay dearly for that.

“Yeah, I've got something to say. I've got one good arm and you leave Emma out of this!” He stood awkwardly knocking Neville's sword away, sending his fist flying at Neville. It connected with his jaw, sending him sprawling into the dirt. Drake grabbed Neville's sword with his good arm and jabbed the point at his neck, drawing blood before pressing harder, gritting his teeth.

“What are your last words Neville?”

“I yield!” He gasped as Drake eased the sword away just a bit.

“Go apologize to Emma, or I'll draw more blood.” He whispered fiercely for only Neville to hear, but he nodded in understanding before getting up.

“I declare Drake Walker the victor!” Constantine called out and cheers erupted amongst the crowd. Their friends rushed forward to congratulate Drake. Emma threw her arms around his neck, making him stumble backwards and wince.

“Watch the shoulder.” Emma let go carefully, realizing maybe she had been too affectionate again.

“You had me worried Drake.” He got a mischievous gleam in his eyes and winked.

“That was magnifique Drake!” Kiara came over and kissed Drake on the cheek making him blush. Emma suppressed an eyeroll and turned away to find Neville standing there.

“Duchess Emma. I would like to apologize for insulting you. I was out of line and pray that you can forgive me.” Emma was surprised and turned to find Drake staring Neville down.

“Get out of my face before you find out how New Yorkers settle these kinds of matters.”

“I won't forget this!” Neville turned back to yell before he scrambled away. Emma and Drake's friends continued to congratulate Drake before he was escorted away to get patched up. The crowd filed back inside when the strange woman from earlier approached Olivia. Emma accompanied them inside and they sized each other up, her name was Lucretia, Olivia's aunt. A servant brought them a bottle of Lythikos wine and scrambled away before Lucretia could intimidate him anymore.

“We should toast, our future unconventional Queen.”

“What do you mean unconventional?” Lucretia smiled, but it was cold and calculating, Emma repressed a shiver.

“A commoner by birth, American, the business with that nobleman...Tariq? Quite the scandal, but you've put all those things behind you of course, loyal to your king and fiancé.” Emma forced a smile, Lucretia knew an awful lot about court for not being around, and a little too much about the arrangement. She tried to move on and diffuse some of the obvious tension between Olivia and her aunt, but it only grew as Lucretia revealed she was there to see Liam.

“King Liam was all Olivia ever wrote about after her parents died, she really held a torch for him.” Olivia took a sip of wine to try and hide the color rising to her cheeks. It wasn't much of a secret that Olivia loved Liam, but it was clear Lucretia was trying to get under Olivia's skin.

“So, you've known Liam for quite a while, what was he like as a young boy?”

“He was, how do I put this?”

“A free spirit?” Olivia offered.

“Yes. Though I would call it overly sensitive. He seems to have matured quite a bit now though, standing by and letting Lord Neville say those things, quite the diplomat.” Lucretia mused, Emma clenched her jaw. She needed to talk to him about that, at least Liam's sudden emotional outbursts over the past few weeks now made sense. Emma was lost in her own thoughts about Lucretia's words, wondering how she could know so much, while she and Olivia continued to argue about Liam and her parents.

“Honestly Olivia! It's time to move on! Liam has clearly moved on, it's time to think of your future!” Olivia was taken aback by her aunt's words.

“What future could you possibly be talking about? You showed no interest in my future as a child, so I don't see how it has any relevance now!”

“Your marriage dear. You need to produce a Nevrakis heir. Obviously, you're not going to listen to anything I have to say tonight though so I'll be going. I should mingle with the other guests.” Lucretia swept out of the room and Olivia relaxed for the first time since she appeared.

“Olivia?” Emma was unsure what to say.

“Do you think she's right?”

“Olivia, I… I mean...I.” she held her hand up, stopping Emma right there.

“I can't do this with you, not not tonight. I'll say something I can't take back. Besides, both of them will be falling over themselves by now, trying to find you.” Olivia downed the rest of her wine, disappearing back into the ballroom, Emma not far behind. As she approached her friends, she could hear them praising Drake, giving him endless food and drinks. She wanted to join them but, saw Bertrand hovering at the edge of the room watching Savannah before running off. Emma chased after him, and after offering her help and expertise after learning what finally happened between them, she was able to help Bertrand get a date with Savannah. Maxwell found her shortly after and was chatting animatedly about how happy he was for Bertrand and Savannah when Drake sidled up behind her.

Tag List: @notoriouscs @brightpinkpeppercorn @ooo-barff-ooo@leelee10898@princesstopgun @choicesyouplayandmore@sleepwalkingelite @roonarific @indigo39 @skyila@speedyoperarascalparty @andy-loves-corgis@furiousherringoperatortoad@blackwidow2721 @drakewalkerfics@findingdrake @sue9659 @smritysriv@tmarie82 @larryssunflower@likethetailofacomet@zaffrenotes @mrsdrakewalkerblog @agent-bossypants @endlessly-searching-for-you @cgd03

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problematicrobert · 7 years

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oh my goodness okay so hear me out....

so during that time after robert's father kicked him out, I like to believe Robert was a rent boy (it would make total sense, we'd know how he met connor, we'd know what he had to do to survive on his own, and it'd explain why he's so skilled in bed with both men and women!), now, get this, tom used to hire Robert.

Okay okay so, it was just supposed to be a one time thing. Tom wanted some relief from the stress of his business and what better way to do that than a little hump and go? So, fast forward and Robert is the one who gets Tom. And it's good. Real good. the sex is amazing and Tom quickly falls for robert's wit, his smart mouth, his intelligence, and he keeps coming back for more. He could have anyone he wanted but robert is the man he's slowly falling for.

It goes on for months, months of midnight booty calls, room service in bed, talking at all hours about their childhood, their parents, their lovers, their mistakes, their worst moments. And despite every ugly thing revealed about themselves, they can never stay away. After a little while, Robert rejects the money Tom gives him (it's always a little more each time they get together) because he feels wrong, ~dirty~, taking Tom's money when he enjoys his company so much. Tom doesn't leave it at that though, of course he continues to buy Robert expensive stuff. Watches, suits, cologne, etc. Robert loves it and Tom loves treating him.

but then it all goes pear shaped. One night it's heating up, it's beautiful, it's lovely, there's candles and flowers and Robert and Tom in bed, curled together, unable to keep their hands off each other. Until the moment Tom is deep inside Robert and tells Robert he loves him.

And he's being truthful. Robert can see it but he can't believe it. It cannot be true. His dad, Katie.... They never loved him. They preferred Andy over him. They hated him. He was a disappointment. The only person who loved him was his mother and look what happened to her? She died. Robert hurt everyone he'd ever met and he couldn't do that to Tom. He loved him too much.

So he left. He took lawrence's job, he packed his bag, he left, and he cried until his throat hurt and he couldn't breathe, until he felt he'd cried so much he wouldn't ever be able to again.

And he couldn't.

Until Tom turns up in the village.

Tom being back shocks robert, and brings him back to those days of feeling powerless and desperate, but at the same time he always felt so ~safe~ with Tom and the emotions are warring with each other. and Tom.... Tom is delighted that Robert has made something of himself, but it's bittersweet because now, he knows robert would never want him.

But robert is Robert, he keeps up his Cold Front because he's been hurt, and he desperately wanted Tom to ask him to stay the last time they fucked but he didnt. and eventually they end up in bed again and Robert is about to get up and leave, hating himself for falling into this again when he knows he'll never be loved back, when Tom says "wait... rob... please. Please stay"

And with Aaron he always had to be the strong one. Had to be there for him, always, never faltering, everybody watching his every move. But Tom... with Tom he finally feels free to be weak, to be human. To be himself. And laying in tom's arms, he can feel tears start to fall from his eyes. and he cries. For his dad, for his mum, for Katie, for aaron... he doesn't have to hold back anymore.

#emmerdale #robert sugden #tom waterhouse #robtom #robron #oh gosh this totally got away from me I am so sorry!! 😂#otp: troubled boyfriends #my post

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notdeadstars · 4 years

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I'm SHOOK an ex/friend reached out to me asking for advice. She said I seem to have everything together I seem successful and I just did it. I'm shocked until I realized social media makes me portray that. I explained to her that social media is fake and nobody sees the hard parts only I do. She is struggling and on a hard path but we just talked that sometimes we have to climb mountains to get there. I look at myself and I dont see success- probably because I'm not exactly where I want to be yet. She looks at me and sees that I've done so many things that she hasn't yet. This makes me look at myself and be softer and proud of what I have done so far. How I've had to do everything on my own without family no support system. Sometimes I forget I really did everything by myself because I'm only looking towards the future and what I'm going to do next (like how when all this coronavirus shit is over I'm taking classes in Chicago to be a cosmetic laser technician and work in a medical setting) I couldn't do that if I didn't go to school to be an esthetician. I couldn't have been an esthetician if I didnt walk miles everyday to get to school because I had no car or license. I couldn't have done that if I didn't get kicked out of my home at 18 and move to Bloomington. I wouldn't have moved to Bloomington if I wasnt homeless and stayed in some random lady's basement until I got on my own feet. I wouldnt have fought as hard as I do if I grew up with support and open arms. I wouldn't have been able to get up and randomly go to a different country and different states for fun if I hadn't of constantly kicked my own ass. I remember my grandfather dying while I was in beauty school. He was the only one who supported me in school, the only one who really loved me. I remember studying for my test the morning of his death. I didn't even touch my phone I just saw endless amount of messages pop up and I knew. I put on my ugly white scrubs and walked miles to school to take that stupid test, then I went home to his house knowing I'd never step back into my favorite childhood memory and home. The day I finally graduated I asked nobody to follow me as I clocked out for the last time. I just left the building, went home and cried. I think life changed after that. I was no longer as bitter I'm the first in my family to be educated in a way. I cried good and bad tears. Good because I did something big but bad because I did it alone with no support. I went on to make commission and I would bring home hundreds and hundreds of dollars everyday. I would cry because I didnt understand why I was the most successful in my family and I didnt even get to show the man who just wanted one person to reach what I did. From there I've lived, bought, and experienced so much. Some I shared on social media but most parts I didnt. Sometimes going through things alone makes us stronger. Remember anything you see on social media is fake. We live in happiness and luxury, but at a cost. So when I complain I dont have enough money as the next person or I pick to put my money into savings as I watch others around me spend it on whatever. I must remember I will have my time again and again because of tough love to myself. After all I love myself and I will take care of my soul. Even with all these amazing things in life I just want to share it with someone and I want their heart to be as soft but strong as mine. Not everyone will understand the depths we have taken and the amount of growing up you will have to do young. Chehalis is smart and strong I have always known her so. She will accomplish great things and I'm so thankful that she has come to me as a friend for advice, and for opening up my eyes.

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whimsically-ominously-auspice · 4 years

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We were talking and enjoying life.

The TV was playing all night and suddenly i stop and listen to the trials about Michael Jackson

So i ask what he wants to do and im told he doesn't want them to go through trial and he had a security team that would try to prevent or stop abuse and there's about 200-300 victims.

So what the original and real Michael Jackson wants to do is take the salary that he paid the impersonators that he agreed to that touched children add it all up and then split it between the victims.

What they want to do is have a judge approve that and then have it announced in the news in a regular way (not through me).

Michael Jackson himself doesn't want anyone to suffer through the emotional testimony.

So I asked what if more victims come forward? And I'm told they will have to search the video footage they have so dates and location etc should be known. So if you say the summer of 1999 at the Ranch well they will look through all the footage they have of where its said it occured then follow the footsteps of the faux Michael to be sure that nothing is missed.

I did kill him. The molestor with HIV AIDS for touching my daughter in 2009.

I was exonerated and i requested no reward, after knowing there was so many more victims, i felt already rewarded in preventing more and being understood and not punished. I said "well just hold it till i really need it" cause that's what i always say when people insist.

So they will give my daughter her portion from the salary as she was a victim.

I wasn't. I was momma bear.

Of course it has to be approved and it is an admission of guilt but the party that will pay is not a child molester nor rapist. And i want that to be clearly stated in their paperwork. So people can clearly understand what happened to them. And they had already plamned to do that as i have talked to them about rebuilding the ability to trust instincts.

And Michael didnt know... When he did ... Find out... It was just too late and then his security hid A lot.. And he's devastated.

So he wants to help all the people at once and have it done and over with for them and admit that he involuntary allowed the children of his world to be exposed to someone disgusting and abusive.

Someone mentioned help rebuild his character. And i don't think that's proper terminology. I think proper is exposing his truth and allowing trust to build and understanding

Because people are all Michael this and Michael that and im all look bitch you're talking about 5 different people and some are evil. That's not one person!! You can't do that it fucks with people's understanding of their own intuition.

People need to talk shit about the ugly one and praise the real

Like i have qE2 and Queen Elizabeth. Two different people. They just need to be seperated.

So people need to figure out what the Hell they're talking about on Instagram and shit before running thier fucking mouths because I've tried to explain to the fan clubs and they're all blind no he has that skin issue. No bitch Michael #4 had the skin issue i done said that 4 times. "No just him."

Omg. Shut up. I ain't got time for this.

So I ain't trying to change the way the world thinks. Im just trying to save it.

It comes better from a real source anyway as i explained to Michael. Like himself. Is the best.

And hes been ready to handle that.

I believe in him. The real him.

If i didn't i wouldn't been so outrageously angry and so scared after I killed his clone thing.

Because I didn't want to hurt Michael.

But I was crazy screaming about how the clone wasn't Michael and less about how he touched my daughter wrong. I mean I caught him so there wasn't much to say about it

"How much did you see?" He asked

"Enough to have the right to kill you since you have your pants off with HIV AIDS and my daughter is naked and screaming and your hands are on her and I was in the bathroom at your suggestion to take my time getting ready and take a shower"

"But how much did you see?!"

"Give me the gun Jesse" that much.

I don't play with HIV AIDS. Not even for 25M not 100M or even the 350M he offered to live to molest more kids as he took his last breath.

Now for one night of consensual probably only half decent sex. Not even great sex i agree to have without a condom. That's my fault. I know better.

But a strong adult? No. Kids get scared that's why i ran out the bathroom topless with a towel. Cause my kid doesn't scream and he called my kid a liar and all this and that. No. Keep talking but walk it outside so the house isn't covered in your HIV AIDS.

Never in my life.

I'm not saying I did it because he had HIV AIDS. I'm saying because he had HIV AIDS, I Had to do it. He had a deadly disease he was exposing innocent children to. I had no choice but to kill him.

If my daughter got HIV AIDS. That's a death sentence. There's no cure.

He had a loaded gun held to my daughters head playing Russian Roulette.

2 weeks later JVN came to see me because that's how he got HIV AIDS as well as some of his friends. One cut their hand and I didn't move about it and just sat and ate guac and chips.

And one said "wtf wasn't that scary?"

Blood with HIV AIDS was less than a foot away from me. It Didnt matter. It was an accident. A cooking mishap. What if we were walking down the street as friends and they were beat up with a hate crime because people are mean?

I'd take part of my shirt or sweater and give it to them to cover their blood. To protect them and me. Because they didn't want to give people HIV AIDS. I would try to give them medical attention without getting blood on me.

So then i was asked what if i had to?

Then instead of wrapping their skin with my clothes id wrap mine and give them CPR and do the best i could to keep their blood off me and keep them alive.

For them it was shock, awe and an awakening.

For me, I could finally let go of the hate i had for faux faux Jackson. Tears began streaming down my face because finally i knew without a doubt forever, that i did do the right thing. I wasn't a selfish mom or a hater.

I was protecting people like them. And preventing people like them. People that had to deal everyday with what happened to them And it broke my heart so terribly that i cried until i couldn't breathe. Because people like them do exist.

They been taken care of financially and health wise. And mentally.

They're all absolutely amazing people always trying to help others.

And so i forgave myself. Because of them.

And that Was why they had went to see me.

So i know that Michael will take care of the other victims as well.

Thank you for understanding.

And thank you, Michael for allowing me to forgive me. And to be your protector when you couldn't be. I love you, too.

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