#the cover design got an upgrade since i got over excited and sent you the first draft 😅 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

quiet-onset · 3 years

Text

New Suit

Pairing: Sam Wilson x Black!Reader

Word Count: 3.8k+

A/N: it’s been forever since I’ve posted, but I have been writing since I was stuck at home with covid 😅 Hopefully I can post something else next week too! ANYWAYS, this fic does not have any TFAWS spoilers and (as usual) does not give a fuck about Endgame, meaning our favorite dysfunctional couple Tony and Steve are alive. Steve simply passed on the mantle. Enjoy!

So Sam was Captain America. And he was proud of that fact.

The day that Steve decided to retire and give him one of his most prized possessions was a day Sam would never forget. A whirlwind of emotions had swelled in his chest. Shock, unworthiness, gratitude. But after talking it over with Steve — and surprisingly enough, with Bucky — Sam agreed to take in the role.

The thing was, no one knew yet. At least, no one outside of the Avengers facility.

Immediately after Thanos, there weren’t really any Avengers level threats. Most threats could be handled by one team member, and it was usually one of the newbies — Peter, Scott, even Wanda. That being so, Sam didn’t have much of a reason to even make public appearances. So he didn’t.

Sometimes, he’d stand in the training room, the red, white, and blue shield strapped to his arm, and just stare in the mirror. Something felt wrong. Out of place. Like the reflection before him was almost right, but he still couldn’t tell what was wrong. Tony had caught him one time as he stepped into the room, a sports bottle full of ice cold water in his hand. “Mid-life crisis?”

Sam jumped at his loud voice and almost scrambled to detach the shield from his arm, like a kid caught with his grubby little hand in the cookie jar. “My bad, I’ll just—“

“No no, keep it on.” Tony waved a hand. “I gave it to Steve, he gave it to you. It’s yours, no give backsies.”

Sam nodded but took the shield off anyway. He decided that he didn’t need to train anymore and headed toward the door. “I’m just gonna go put this back.”

“What is going on with you, Wilson?”

“What do you mean?”

Tony raised a brow, “What do I mean? You staying cooped up in this facility. Barely training with the shield. Opting out of assignments. That’s what I mean.”

“There’s not much of a need.”

“There is. You just don’t see it yet.” Tony walked toward him. “Look, I know being the new Cap has you freaked out—“

“I’m not freaked out.”

“Sure. But Steve chose you and that should be good enough.”

“It is.” Sam huffed as he turned the shield in his hands. “I don’t know, man. I just… It’s just hard to believe. Hard to put in action, I guess.”

“Well, seeing is believing.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Head to room 626 when you get a chance.”

“What’s in room 626?”

“You’ll see.”

—

Sam exited the elevator on the sixth floor to loud muffled music. Looking around, he realized he’d never even been to that part of the facility before. The white walls and obscure art seemed strange and misplaced in a building full of superhumans. Too clean, too elegant.

Each of the rooms seemed that way too. Sam paused in the hallway, glancing through some of the glass doors with people’s names painted neatly at the top. Hardwood floors and marble countertops in each room. So impeccably clean that even dust bunnies wouldn’t dare step foot inside.

Yet, when Sam approached room 626, he realized this was where the loud music was coming from. Different from the other rooms, this one was messy and colorful. He slid the glass door open, flinching at loud volume.

He recognized the track — his father used to listen to it all the time when he was growing up. He could almost hear his dad’s deep voice teasing him: “You don’t know nothin’ ‘bout this, son. This was before your time.” Of course Sam knew the song. His dad was the one who put him on. Still, Sam’s dad always got a kick out the playful fight he put up.

The long, seemingly endless hallway was painted a blinding white. He could make out a peculiar smell as he walked toward the end of the hall. Wet paint or fumes, he wasn’t really sure. He just pulled his shirt over his nose and kept looking for… well only God really knew.

Finally, he arrived in the main room and saw you and your controlled chaos. You had ten or twenty different fabrics pinned to one wall and sketches of different outfits pinned to the opposing one. Against the back wall were mannequins wearing your works in progress. And just in front of Sam on a large wooden desk were schematics and what looked like engineering tools. Soldering iron, wires, circuit boards, and the like.

Everything seemed like a tornado of colors, clothes, and fabric. But you? You were as cool as a cucumber with your expensive looking spray painting mask strapped on as you sprayed the back of a jean jacket with bright pink paint. Sam chuckled when he heard your muffled voice sing along to the song, not noticing his presence. “Sherry bay-yay-by. Sherry, wontcha come out tonight.”

Sam pulled his shirt back down with a small grin on his lips, debating whether he should disturb you. In the end, he decided to save you the embarrassment, but by then, you’d already moved on to the next verse. You dropped your voice down low in an attempt to sound just like Nick Massi, singing, “Why don’t you come on.”

Sam let out a loud laugh, only covering it with his hand as you jumped, finally realizing someone else was in the room. “Sorry.” Sam chuckled. “Didn’t mean to interrupt your concert.”

You pulled the mask over your head, revealing a nervous smile. You jogged to the desk and grabbed the remote to switch off the stereo. “Concert’s a flattering choice of words.”

“Well you were really nailing that Massi.”

You raised a brow as you set down the can of spray paint. “You listen to Four Seasons?”

“Growing up, it was a staple in the Wilson household.” He offered his hand. “I’m Sam, by the way.”

“Y/N.” You shook it, an impressed smile on your face. “So what can I do for you, Sam?”

“I’m actually not sure. Tony just kinda sent me up here.” He raised a brow when you gasped, amused with your excitement. He smiled as the cute squeal that pushed past your lips. “I assume you know what that means.”

“I’ve been asking him forever if I could design your new suit!”

“New suit?”

“I mean, if you’re okay with it.” You added.

“I just don’t see why I need a new suit is all.” Sam shrugged as he looked around at all your work. He knew, way deep down in the rational part of his consciousness, that he needed a new suit. There wasn’t anything wrong with his Falcon suit, but wearing a new suit seemed too definite. If he put on a new combat suit, it meant that he was fully stepping into this new role. That he would be Captain America in more than just name. People would look at him, at his suit, and recognize that he was the Captain America.

“How about this?” You stepped toward him, prepared to bargain. “Let me make you a suit. If you don’t like it, I’ll just give your Falcon suit an upgrade. Deal?”

He let out a nervous chuckle at your offer. He had nothing to lose, really. Either way, he got upgrades. Still, he looked over at you and decided he couldn’t be the one to snuff the ambitious look in your dark eyes. He shook your hand, smiling softly at the triumphant grin that broke across your face. “Deal.”

“Great!” You were bouncing on your toes when he agreed. You practically raced back to your desk and started shuffling through your sketches and until you found the folder you were searching for. You handed them to Sam, “You can come back tomorrow morning so I can take your measurements. Till then, look through these sketches and tell me what you like.”

“So you’ve been working on this for awhile?” Sam asked, briefly flipping through the many colorful sketches.

“Ever since Tony told me about you.”

He let out a breath of amusement through his nose. Of course it was Tony, trying to set things in motion before Sam was even sure of what he wanted. Still, he knew Tony was trying to help. Sam gestured with the folder. “I’ll take a look.”

“Cool. Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow.”

—

When Same woke up the next day, he found himself immediately thinking about meeting with you later. He felt weird. Nervous, even. Whether it was due to the idea of a new suit — of being Captain America — or seeing you, he wasn’t sure. All he knew was that he felt like a swarm of butterflies had flown from his stomach to his throat and decided to make a home there.

After stepping out of the shower, which took twenty more minutes than usual, he fumbled around for something to wear. What was he supposed to wear to fitting anyway? Sweats? Jeans? As his mind wandered, he thought of you. Rather, he thought of how you would see him. Maybe I should wear the green shirt, he thought. Girls always seem to like the green shirt.

He paused. Why was he thinking that?

He’d just met you. He knew a total of two facts about you: your name was Y/N and you listened to Four Seasons. That was hardly enough for Sam to be worried about how he looked for you. Yet, there he was, slipping on the dark green shirt that seemed to stretch ever so slightly across his broad chest. He settled on a pair of dark jeans before heading down to the kitchen for a cup of coffee.

As he stepped into the communal kitchen, Bucky was already sitting at the island, back facing Sam. He had just returned from his daily run, still in his sweatpants and white T-shirt with a cup of coffee in front of him. “There’s still fresh coffee in the pot.” Bucky mumbled into his cup as he flipped to the next page of the newspaper.

“Thanks.” Sam walked past him, slapping the newspaper into Bucky’s face as he walked by. “Why are you reading a newspaper?”

“To keep up with the news. Like a normal person.”

“There are these great new things called cell phones. Most people read the news on those now.”

“Well, I’m not most people, am I?” Bucky lowered the newspaper and furrowed his brow at the sight of Sam. “What girl are you trying to impress?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Green shirt.”

“What about it?”

“That’s your ‘I want a girl to like me’ shirt.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Sam scoffed as he poured a second cup of coffee. “This is just a shirt.”

“The shirt.”

“I’m not having this argument with you.”

“Not much of an argument when you know I’m right.” Bucky smirked. “Who’s the second cup for?”

Sam paused as he realized he’d been caught, but quickly recovered with an eye roll. “For me. So I don’t have to come back and hear your annoying ass voice.”

“Mhm. Tell the girl I said hi.”

“Screw you.” Sam left the kitchen to the sound Bucky’s chuckles, reluctant to admit that he was right. Moments later, he was waiting for the elevator, tapping his shoe to distract himself from the butterflies that were starting to flutter around again. When the doors slid open, Tony briefly greeted Sam before stopping and pulling off his glasses. “Green shirt?”

Sam stepped past him. “Shut up.”

Every step closer to your workspace had him jittery. Not only was he forced to deal with these unfamiliar feelings for you — if that’s what they were — but he was finally being confronted with his new position. One step closer to replacing Steve. To being Captain America. Yet, he couldn’t deny, he could envision himself in some of the suits you had sketched for him. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

When he entered 626, there was loud music playing once again. Another old song he recognized, Van Morrison. He smiled at the thought of you dancing around your space again, singing along to Brown Eyed Girl. It wasn’t so much about him catching you in the act. It was nice, a privilege really, to see the natural you. Eyes closed, arms up, hips swaying. Seeing how you act when you believed no one was watching was like strangely endearing.

And there you were, almost matching his wandering thoughts to a tee. You were setting up for work, once again not noticing Sam’s arrival. You danced across the room as you moved things from place to place. You began to sing out the words as you prepared to lift your tri-fold mirror. Sam broke from the trance and called out your name. You jumped and placed a hand over your heart, laughing quietly when you saw it was only him. “Caught me again.”

“To be fair, you seem pretty easy to catch with the way you get lost in music.” Sam smiled, placing the coffee cups on your desk, far from any of your papers. “Let me get that for you.”

“Oh, you don’t have to—”

“It’s no problem. Just tell where you want it.”

You stepped away from the mirror, tossing a stray braid over your shoulder with a smile. “Just over there, in front of that pedestal. Thanks.” When he went to lift it, your eyes were drawn to his arms, watching his biceps flex. You caught yourself before you could begin to stare, heat rising to your cheeks as you went to look for your measuring tape.

“Oh, by the way, I brought you a cup of coffee.” Sam mentioned as he set the mirror down. “You know, if you drink it? I didn’t know what you put in it, if anything, so it’s black. Is that okay?”

“That’s perfect, actually.” You sighed happily. “I’ve been trying to replace coffee with loud music in the mornings, hence the dancing.”

“Of course.” He chuckled in response.

“And while I love to blast Morrison at nine in the morning, it’s not the same without a hot cup of coffee.” You took the cup he offered with a smile. “Thanks for thinking of me.”

Sam couldn’t help how his heart skipped a beat. “Don’t mention it.”

You took a sip, “So, you ready to get measured for your new suit?”

“As I’ll ever be.”

“Great, just step onto the pedestal for me, and relax.”

“Got it.”

It was quiet as you brought the tape measure under his arms and around his chest. It wasn’t exactly uncomfortable, but Sam was sure his nerves had to be radiating out of him. The butterflies were beating against his ribcage as you pulled just tight enough on the tape measure. You took note of the number and bent over to write it down on your notepad. Being so close to you, Sam felt himself tense up as you measured around his waist. You chuckled and looked up at him. “You gotta relax.”

“I’m relaxed.”

“If you don’t loosen up, your new suit is gonna be super tight in all the wrong places.” You joked. “Talking usually helps.”

“About what?”

“Anything.” You shrugged. “Like why are you so opposed to a new suit?”

Almost as if it was a reflex, Sam tensed up again with a nervous and playful chuckle. “Way to get me to relax.”

“I’m just saying.” You laughed, adjusting the tape once again. “It’s not like you’re not qualified. I mean, Steve chose you.”

“Yeah, he did. I wish it were that simple in my mind.” He admitted.

“What’s your mind saying?”

“What isn’t it saying?” Sam rolled his eyes at himself. “It’s just… I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do.”

“I don’t want to put that on you. That’s not your job.”

“It’s not.” You agreed with a chuckle. “But that’s not why I asked. You can tell me.”

Again, with a wave of confusion, he felt the tension melt away. He didn’t know why he felt this way, like he could tell you anything and everything. There was a familiarity about you, like you were someone he’d known his entire life despite only meeting twenty hours ago. His father probably would’ve called you an old soul. Maybe in some other lifetime, in another universe, you knew each other. Or maybe, this was just fate coming to pass. Destiny finding, not two halves, but two wholes — putting them together like some sort of experiment to see what would come of it.

“It’s just… how am I supposed to follow after Steve?” He asked. “He has such a huge story, this legacy just hanging over my head. He’s been saving people since before either of us were born. And now here I am, some dude from the Air Force that met Steve completely by accident, about to take up his shield. It just seems unbelievable. Literally.”

You nodded as you measured around his left thigh. “First, let me say that your feelings are completely valid.”

“Why do I feel like you’re about to decimate everything I just said?”

“Not decimate!” You laughed. “Just gently prove wrong.”

“Oh, in that case.” He smiled down at you.

“Shut up.” You snapped him with the tape measure before measuring his other thigh. “Steve is not the only one with a story. I mean, Sam Wilson, the guy who grew up in Harlem, lost his parents and his best friend, and still managed to not give up? The guy Steve Rogers trusted with his life almost immediately after meeting him? The same dude who stole a top secret government project and used it to become a superhero? I think that’s pretty badass.”

Sam considered your words with a small smile. Sure, he may have seemed normal — maybe even mundane — to himself, but the fact is that he had also been through a lot. Just like Steve, Sam realized that his life was no walk in the park. Not many people couldn’t have lived Sam’s life and come out the other side not just okay but strong. He wasn’t Steve Rogers, but that didn’t matter. He was Sam Wilson, and maybe that was okay.

“You’re good at that.” He commented quietly, looking down at you. He just about caught himself staring at you. The bright smile across your ruby shaded lips, the almost childlike excitement in your eyes. And your eyes — jesus. They were the same color as his, a dark brown. Yet, he couldn’t help but find yours so much more interesting.

“At what?”

“Talking to people.”

“Not everyone. Just...” You shook your head as you stood up straight. There was something indecipherable in his eyes — or maybe you wanted to believe it was. Still, it was there. Admiration, confusion, gratefulness? You weren’t sure. But the intensity of his stare made heat spread across your cheeks one more, and you ducked your head, moving to the side to measure the length of his arm. “Just people like you.”

Minutes later, you finished his measurement and moved on to the designs. You and Sam went through each and every one, noting his likes and dislikes. As time went on, it became very apparent that he was ready to be Captain America. Even if he wasn’t sure yet, you were. Much too soon, every detail of his new suit was planned out, and it was time for Sam to go.

“If I make this my top priority, I can have your new suit finished in two weeks, tops.”

“You don’t have to do that.” Sam said bashfully. “I’m sure you have other work to do.”

“None as exciting or as important.”

“Now you’re just stroking my ego.” He joked.

You scoffed painfully, “Like you need me to do that.”

You walked beside him, down the hall and to the elevator. He couldn’t help but wish he had some sort of excuse to stay, but leading the Avengers meant a mountain of responsibilities. Still, he wanted to see you again. Not for work and not for designing a new suit. He wanted to get to know you away from the fabric and tape measures. He wanted to find out how someone as sweet and breathtaking as you could even exist in a world filled with such evil left and right. So, he rocked back and forth for a moment before turning to you.

“And um, Y/N?”

“Yes?”

Sam fully intended to ask you out just then. But he felt like he couldn’t move. A feeling of nervousness he hadn’t gotten since he was a teenager, he was frozen. Staring at you like a deer in headlights, his brain screamed at him: Just ask her, you dumbass! Then, the elevator announced its arrival with a ding and broke his concentration. He cleared his throat and smiled nervously. “Thank you again. You’ve been a huge help.”

You blinked in confusion but stammered out, “Glad to be of service.”

It wasn’t until a few days later that Sam had gained the courage to do what he should’ve done in that moment.

The city was in danger — some high-level Hydra threat — and the Avengers were needed. Everyone rushed off to suit up, including Sam. That’s when he saw it. You had just finished his suit, and it was more than Sam could’ve ever imagined. A shiny white breastplate with red decals on the torso, blue pants lined with bulletproof material, and to top it off, his signature red wings. That was something he wanted to keep. They reminded him of his humble beginnings, of what made him the man that Steve chose to be Captain America.

And Captain America he was.

Sam was aware of all the stares he got as he fought the Hydra agents and ended the crisis with the rest of the team. He knew it would take some getting used to. But he was pretty sure — no, extremely sure that he could do this. He could be the symbol that the public needed.

He strolled back into the Avengers Complex, handing a handcuffed Hydra agent off to be questioned, when he saw you. You were usually there waiting, ready for feedback on your new toys and inventions. But what Sam said surprised you.

“Hey Sam,” You started. “Did your new suit fare well? I was already thinking of some modifications based on —“

“Would you like to go out with me this Saturday?”

You blinked, lowering your clipboard in shock. “What?”

“Would you like to have dinner with me on Saturday?” He smiled wide and unabashedly. Then, with no hesitation, you smacked him on the arm with your clipboard, making him bark out a laugh.

“Took you long enough.”

#sam wilson x reader #cap!sam wilson x reader #marvel x reader #marvel fanfiction #sam wilson x black!reader #cap!sam wilson x black!reader #marvel x black!reader #sam wilson fanfiction #cap!sam wilson fanfiction #captain america x reader #captain america x black!reader

138 notes · View notes

remmushound · 3 years

Text

Radio Hearts, chapter 5!! @scentedcandlecryptid @digitl-art-monstr

Shelldon woke up.

Donatello was there in front of him and he was beaming! His face seemed several shades brighter with the joy that overwhelmed him and Shelldon’s sights even picked up the beginnings of tears starting to form.

“Dee?” Shelldon whirled. “I feel weird.”

Sheldldon tried to hover, but it felt wrong, so he stopped. He felt heavy, and Donatello seemed small. Had Shelldon grown?

“Easy, buddy.” Donatello soothed, rubbing a hand across some part of Shelldon. Wait, was that a shoulder? “Here, let me help you.”

Donatello grabbed the chair that Shelldon was seated in and wheeled him over to the standing mirror. Shelldon gasped loudly when he saw his reflection, reaching up to grab at his face. Three fingers gently caressed a fully formed cheek. In shape, it greatly resembled the one he was used to; triangular with a glowing pink mouth and pink, frog-like eyes. He had an upright posture and a plastron like Donatello, except with three glowing vents in his belly just below his mystic heart. He looked down at both his hands, modeled after the mutant turtles he lived with, but his feet more greatly resembled a tortoise, blocky and flat with four claw-like toes. He strained the limits of his tubular neck to look at his carapace, finding five spiked ridges and six valleys between them, speckled with light pink freckles that added to the textured effect.

“Woaaahhhh…” Shelldon leaned closer to the mirror to get a better look at himself. “I look radical!”

Donatello took Shelldon by the hands and lifted him from the seat and to his feet, keeping a tight hold of the drone— no, the turtle!— so he wouldn’t topple over. Shelldon wasn’t quite as tall as Donatello was, more Michelangelo’s height, but he didn't care. He was tall! He lifted a foot to get a better look at it and almost fell to the opposite side from the shifted weight. Donatello was there to grab and stabilize him, however, lowering him carefully to the ground.

“Easy, Shelldon. You gotta learn how to walk first.”

“I got legs!” Shelldon cheered, then fell over onto his carapace as his weight shifted. “Ow.”

Donatello laughed and helped Shelldon to sit up again. “You’re fine.”

“This was my surprise?” He asked, looking at Donatello.

Donatello smiled and nodded. “It’s been exactly a year since I first made you. Figured I’d give you a little birthday upgrade.”

Before Donatello could even finish the sentence, Shelldon had thrown his arms around the softshell and they both toppled over with Shelldon’s greater weight.

“Thank you thank you thank you!” Shelldon almost screamed his excitement, “Where are my hovers?” He looked all around the length of his body searching for the flight feature.

Donatello grabbed Shelldon’s carapace at the base and lifted it up. The shell seperated in the middle and both halves sprawled out to their designated sides like a beetle’s wings. When the shell was opened, two large wings unfolded from just below where Shelldon’s shoulder blades would be.

“It’s gonna take you a while to get used to your new body, but I, of course, will be there to help.” Donatello boasted. “Once you practice, you will be able to unfold your wings on your own. I tried to incorporate your usual hovers, but with your increased weight, it wasn’t feasible. But this body does solve your overheating problem by adding a respiratory function to increase your cooling output.”

Respiratory? Shelldon opened his mouth and sucked in air— something he had never done before! The relief was immediate and cooling, making him slump slightly as he breathed out almost scolding steam.

“That means you only have to have one oil change a day instead of three!”

“That’s awesome!” Shelldon beeped.

“There are several other features that I am soooo excited for you to discover, but I want you to learn it by yourself! It’s your new body, you should learn at your own pace. But I will help you with the basics.”

Donatello stood up and held out his hands. It took Shelldon several times to properly adjust his motor function enough to grab the softshell’s hand, and when he did Donatello was able to yank him up with ease.

“Now: Let’s start simple.”

***

Shelldon was kept in the lab for two weeks following his upgrades, but he didn't mind it. Donatello was with him more and more each day teaching him about how to use the new body. First helping him to stand on his own and then teaching him how to walk, and then how to run. Occasionally, one of the other brothers would come in to help him improve his motor function, be it with card games or catch or simply typing their messages for them on a phone. Slowly, his bolts loosened up and the activities got simpler and simpler until he could even change his oil on his own! With his increased battery and cooling circulation, he was much more active. After the two weeks were up, Shelldon quickly found his new favorite hobby.

“Hit me with your best shot!”

Raphael charged with all the strength and size of a raging bull. Shelldon made no attempt to get out of the way, bracing himself for the impact. When it came, he was ready for it, and he brought Raphael first to a stalemate before slowly adding more force to press back against him. Then he was the one who was forcing Raphael across the dojo, but Raphael only let himself get so far before he gave up and dove out of the way so Shelldon was sent stumbling.

Raphael tried to charge Shelldon from behind. At the very last moment, Shelldon’s bladed wings opened up and closed on Raphael’s plastron to lock him in place, four spider limbs identical to the ones Donatello had revealed themselves to restrain Raphael’s arms and legs. The snapper was stunned for a moment, but then quickly tried to struggle against the bot.

“One. Two. Three. Four. Five!” Shelldon let go of Raphael as he counted down, closing his wings and laughing. “I win!”

“Ugh!” Raphael groaned. “No fair! Rematch!”

“You’re so on!”

“No you’re not.” Donatello appeared out of the shadows where even Shelldon hadn’t sensed him.

“Aww…” Shelldon pouted, “But Deeeee!”

“No buts.” Donatello crossed his arms.

“Please?” Raphael begged.

“Pretty please?” Shelldon followed up.

“Pretty please with a pepperoni on top?” Raphael clasped his hands together and stuck out his bottom lip; Shelldon copied the motion.

“No.” Donatello said simply, and waved Shelldon to follow him.

“Aw…” Shelldon walked as slowly as he could, dragging his feet the entire time.

Donatello looked back at him. “If you keep dragging your feet, you’re going to miss your flying lessons~.”

Shelldon gasped loudly and immediately picked up the pace. “Coming Dee!”

***

“Easy, Shelldon... “ Donatello soothed, “There’s no rush.”

The gap was small, hardly twice as long as Shelldon was tall, and Donatello was waiting anxiously on the other side with his arms outstretched ready to catch the drone.

“I got this, Dee!” Shelldon flashed his carapace open and gave the slightest buzz as his wings were unfolded and freed. The wings readjusted themself rather noisily as Shelldon got into position.

“Take your time.” Donatello encouraged, “Take a few deep breaths. Make sure you’re cool before—“

Shelldon jumped.

“OH DEAR MOTHER OF CHALUPA HE JUMPED!”

Shelldon glided effortlessly across the gaps and into Donatello’s waiting arms.

***

The flight lessons took up most of the night, and by the time Shelldon and Donatello got home, both of them wanted nothing more than to rest. The two of them still shared Donatello’s lab as their room and Shelldon didn’t care to change any time soon; he liked being around Dee! Donatello ignored the food that Michelangelo tried to offer him in favor of marching straight to his room and falling face-first on his bed, immediately asleep.

Shelldon went quickly to his charging pod; it was essentially an upright bed, fit with cushions and a blanket-like curtain to cover himself, and a pinned-up pillow. The only difference was that there was space designed to let Shelldon spread out his wings and soft holders to rest them on so that the charging plug in the middle of his back was exposed to the charging dock. Once Shelldon had got himself into position, tucked comfortably under the curtain-blanket and making sure his body was accepting the charge, he pulled the clear glass door closed so he wouldn’t fall out and nuzzled deeper into the cool cushions.

Shelldon went to sleep and dreamed of his family.

#hes all grown up!#but still living at home #Don loves his robot son #Shelldon a big boy now!#end

16 notes · View notes

bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture · 3 years

Text

Alright, chapter 8! And man is there a lot to talk about here. I don’t really have any pre-content things to say, so we’ll just hop right into it today!

[No. 8 - Rage, You Damned Nerd]

I swear, this first page has a LOT to talk about on it, so I’ll go from panel to panel and do some rambling thoughts on each segment.

First off, UA doesn’t actually handle the costumes the kids get! It’s support companies affiliated with the school that does - which makes sense, since the school has to focus on teaching their support students before letting them get their hands on actual costumes that these kids might be fighting in.

I mean, they seem to be allowed to practice on like, minor support stuff (read: Mei making Izuku his new gloves post-Nighteye or somewhere around there) but not full costuming, which is… actually a bit reassuring? But also explains some of the lag time in getting costume repairs / upgrades since they’re probably busy companies. It also explains why there probably aren’t major alterations to any costumes besides between the summer and winter variants, since it would be time-consuming to remake these costumes so regularly.

(It still doesn’t excuse some of the costumes the kids got, but that’s more on the whole ‘eye candy’ thing for readers than actual practicality, so whatever.)

(Also, I can’t get over the fact that Snipe has a support company. Fucking Snipe. Guess we know another canon or likely-canon Support teacher.)

Next we get a preview of what the kids sent in for specifications for their costumes:

We get a bit of insight into a few of the characters - as background stuff, we get Shouji, Mineta, Aoyama, and Sato. Mineta got pretty dunked on for char design and costuming, and Aoyama’s costume almost looks like a magical girl outfit like this, which honest to god would have been fantastic to see him in. More interesting (at least to me) are the other three: Ochako, Tenya, and Katsuki.

Ochako first, because that pressure point thing is interesting, and I dunno how often those actually come up in fics besides a passing mention, like. What if her support bracelets / neck piece broke during training / a mission / whatever? Would she suddenly have to fight through the nausea? By the point of current canon (War Arc) she’s probably trained enough that she doesn’t need them as much, but man, it could be an interesting little thing to explore, like, post-Kamino.

Tenya is a bit surprising, since we know he comes from a well-off hero family. Logically, this was before the whole Hosu / Ingenium plotline was really developed, so Tenya didn’t have that to fall back on, or it could be argued that the support company that Ingenium is associated with also works with UA. Alternatively, it could be that either Tenya didn’t want to rely on his family (which seems silly when they’d know how to work with his quirk best) or UA is very firm on ALL costume stuff going through them…

But then again, Katsuki. Oh god, Katsuki. What fucking support company looked at this kid and went ‘yeah we should give him a way to store more explosives AND give him bombs’ and just. Did so. Why did UA not vet that. Maybe the support company didn’t realize how strong his explosions were without the gear, but UA, man, I just. I suppose they had no way of knowing how reckless he’d be with them, but honestly, after the battle trials, they should have been fucking yoinked from him so damned fast.

Anyways, onto other parts of Katsuki’s costume, we see he’s a fucking dork. Possibly what lowered their guard. ‘Something scary’ and ‘Dynamighte all over’. What the hell, kid. At least your designer stuck close to your design… including the huge-ass clunky gauntlets. Man, the Musketeer Trio movie poster ones are so much better looking and so, so streamlined. Works of art, they are.

Moving on, we get a bit of a flashback to ~three weeks ago, which by the calendar would be around March 20th? So a few weeks after the Entrance Exam. And Izuku is only NOW getting around to updating the quirk registry? Izuku baby seriously, how the FUCK did none of the UA staff notice the ‘quirkless’ on your application form at any point before this?

But yeah, he’s worried about his registry, so he calls Toshinori, who explains the update process. It gives the example of someone who might alter their stuff with updated information, with one or two allowed - though major ones aren’t accepted. Toshinori then says it’ll probably be okay since he started with nothing, then tries to correct himself to ‘definitely’, only to get cut off because Izuku accidentally hangs up in a panic when Inko calls out that she’s home. Haha poor Toshinori, and poor Izuku, the two anxious dumbasses.

Anyways, moving on from that is Inko showing off the jumpsuit she made, with Izuku surprised. She admits it’s not the coolest, but she based it off of the design in his notebook (the one we saw back in chapter 1). She tells him she regrets giving up on him back then, and how he never quit regardless of her faith. She apologizes and says from there on she’ll be cheering him on with all she’s got.

Izuku’s narration notes that it’s a symbol of his mom’s love, and that he couldn’t wear anything else, even if it’s not ‘efficient’ or ‘cutting edge’. (Or even at all decent looking.) And it’s also hinted through the present thoughts on it that it’s meant to be an homage to All Might (the smile and the hair pieces) which is just such a dorky thing.

We get to the wide-spread of hero costumes, which- wait a second.

That’s Momo’s initial hero costume design???? Why did Hori not stay with that??? It’s a LOT better than the stuff we’ve seen her in later! Like, sure, it’d still be improved with the main opening being her stomach and not her chest, but this still looks like actual human clothing and not a sexy Halloween costume variant of her hero uniform. Fucking hell, now I’m even more mad.

Tsuyu’s costume meets the approval of the discord server as basically ‘no changes needed’ asides from maybe the goggles being a bit bulky.

Tenya’s costume, I’m sorry, I know it’s an homage to your brother / family, but were the additional pipes really needed? Also, the helmet isn’t a bad idea since he goes fast, and bugs in the mouth/teeth have to suck, but it just looks so damned Gundam-y I can’t help but laugh a little.

Shouto… nah, too easy a target.

Aoyama is Aoyama. I’m actually a bit disappointed now that it’s not a magical girl costume, but alas, I suppose even Hori couldn’t be that brave.

Kaminari… I forgot he had that headset thingy.

Don’t really have much else to say about anyone else, so let’s move on.

Izuku bugs out a bit about Ochako’s costume/appearance, while she compliments his more practical looks and laments not being specific, saying it’s a bit too puffy and curvy for her. Which means it’s more the accessories which seem to be her issue with it over the main costume itself? Huh.

Anyways, after All Might confirms they’re all there, he notices Izuku’s headpieces, which are a match to his costume, and has to turn to muffle a laugh for how obvious a reference it is. Tenya steps up, asking whether they’ll be doing cityscape maneuvers again since it’s the same field used in the entrance exam. Izuku thinks to himself how cool Tenya’s costume is, while All Might explains that they’re moving onto step two - indoor anti-personnel battle training!

He explains what while villain battles are most commonly seen outdoors, statistically the worst crimes and villains are more likely to be found indoors. Confinement, house arrest, black market deals… the clever villains luck indoors to avoid heroes. Which is why the class will be split into teams of two and pit against each other, heroes versus villains style!

Ah, Tsuyu. Calling him right the heck out, as expected. All Might then notes that in this scenario, the fight won’t be against disposable robots.

This entire page is just fucking hilarious. The class and all their questions while All Might is shaking with nerves. The fucking cheat sheet he uses to try to get back on track. Him being questioned on the lot drawing, and shaking while Izuku accidentally ends up covering for him. I just. All Might was not prepared for this mess and it shows. He was doing so much better when it was the one on one stuff with Izuku.

But yeah, Izuku notes the scenario is like from a western comic plot, and he’s also the one who ‘realizes’ the lots are like when heroes from different agencies have to team up for emergencies without prior warning.

Lots are drawn, and we have our teams:

Izuku’s so stressed out because he still can’t really talk to her, while she’s excited to be teamed up and calls it ‘fate’ that it happened. All Might draws the first two teams to participate, and… team Izuku and Ochako (as the heroes) versus team Katsuki and Tenya (as the villains). Both Izuku and Katsuki are alert from this development…

Which makes this a good point to cut off, since it’s halfway through and we got a lot of information to chew on already. Second part should be out this weekend (hopefully).

#chapter 8 #readthrough #opening arcs #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #midoriya izuku #uraraka ochako #iida tenya #yagi toshinori #bakugou katsuki #midoriya inko #class 1a #izuku's first costume was fucking hideous #thank god hori / the support company improved on it afterwards #also shouto #i don't even need to say anything when the fandom has made fun of your for me #also i cannot BELIEVE we were robbed of this momo costume #what the FUCK hori

46 notes · View notes

stony-spn · 4 years

Text

House Tour

(Established relationship, married au, avengers as family, soft/fluff, Tony is a mother hen, words 2304)

This isn't something new for Tony, he always liked showing off to the world that he was more than just exploding things. So when Architectural Digest asked Pepper to do an episode on the Avengers Tower to say Tony was excited was an understatement. This was his baby that he made from the ground up, every floor in the tower was made especially for his weird little family that he is very happy to spoil now and then.

“Steve, did you clean your side of the closet?” Tony yelled from the main kitchen when we heard the footsteps approach him.

“Umm…yes… maybe…..kinda. I just got a call from Maria she needs me on this mission right now. I’ll be back first thing tomorrow morning.” Steve replied with his arms folded to his chest, trying to look guilty for not being able to help but Tony could see that the bustard was more than happy to leave all of this on Tony’s shoulders.

“Oh is that so, okay but do make sure you don’t tire yourself too much since you’ll be sleeping on the couch for a week.” Tony couldn’t help but smirk at the small gasp that left Steve’s mouth, well two can play that game.

Tony felt a kiss on his neck that he happily gave more access to, “How about we make it three days?” Steve said while sucking on Tony’s earlobe and making him moan and ache for more.

“I’ll make it for two weeks if you try to bargain with me on this,” Tony said while turning in his husband’s hands to get a proper kiss.

“Well gotta make the most of it, for now, I guess,” Steve replied and started kissing his husband deeply.

“OH COME ON NOT IN FRONT OF YOUR KIDS!!” Clint yelled as soon as he saw his leaders making out in the kitchen.

“Yes daddy hard, uh, daddy..” moans started to leave Tony’s lips that only sent more shivers down Steve’s back.

“I WISH SOMEONE KILLS ME. THOR PLEASE SMASH ME BUDDY, THOR!!” Clint cried.

“I do have to leave, my love,” Steve said in between the sweet little kisses that he left on Tony’s mouth.

“You have to be back before AD comes tomorrow Steve or else I swear on your ass I will kill you.”

“I’ll try my best your majesty,” Steve replied with a smirk and a bow. That flattery asshole will make Tony’s weak heart explode.

Tony went to their master bedroom to clean it up before AD comes tomorrow because his husband would rather take Fury over-cleaning. Which should be concerning.

After a long day of cleaning Tony makes his way to the main kitchen again to feed his “so-called” kids who would live on fast food and take-outs if it wasn’t for Tony and Natasha making them home cook food. Tony loved cooking, it was the only thing we had left of his mother, Jarvis, and Ana. He still has all their recipe books even tho he has perfected and learned each recipe by heart. You know what they say if you want to win someone’s heart the stomach is the way, and when your husband is a super soldier, stomach is most definitely the way. So he started off cooking to impress Steve on their dates which soon held to a habit of always worrying if his super soldier is eating enough. Hence left to him making food for his family. So this was an enjoyable time. He was in charge of it. He gets to make everyone do the dishes or put the table on because hey if he is cooking he isn’t cleaning as well.

“What is our dear mother bear making today?” Bruce asked as soon as he saw Tony cutting meat.

“Brucie bear if you call me the mother of this relationship just because I cook, I am telling Nat.” Tony replied while hitting Bruce’s hand with the back of the knife to keep him from putting his finger in the pot, “And no putting your dirty hands in mama’s pot”.

“Oh no! We call you mama because you my friend have a serious mother hen problems that we all love and adore of course.” Bruce smartly covered his tracks.

“Well to answer your previous question I am making seekh kabab karahi, it’s a Pakistani dish. Thor wanted something spicy and you know Clint he is a spice whore.” Tony stating like this was the most obvious fact in the world.

“So no special treat for me and Nat. And we all know you are making this for Steve, he is the real “spice whore” in this family” Bruce replied as he started mixing the pot so the gravy doesn’t stick and burn. Bruce likes helping Tony not only in the lab but in the kitchen too. Guess they aren’t only science bros.

“Steve was called on a mission this morning. Don’t know where or don’t know who. He just told me he’ll be back in the morning.” Tony said as he took over the pot and pointed at Bruce to start cutting the salad.

“Don’t worry he’ll be fine shellhead.” Nat (who no one knows when came in the kitchen) patted Tony’s back and gave him a half hug.

Tony knew it was ridiculous and that Steve could take care of anything. But ever since Tony put Iron Man on retirement he can’t help but not worry since now he never knows anything about anything. But his family is always there for him to help him not worry himself too sick. He was grateful for them.

“Miss. Nat, I believe it’s your turn to set the table” Tony replied rather too quickly to avoid the thickness he feels is coming around his throat.

“Relax mama I am here in peace.” Nat clapped her hands and danced towards the table. It was still a little crazy to see them all so comfortable with each other.

“I SMELL YOUR FOOD FROM MY ROOM TONY AND CAME RUNNING DOWN TO EAT WHAT MAMA BEAR HAVE FOR US TODAY” Thor yelled as soon as he entered the dining table that was now set with dishes and food. Everything looked perfect.

“Jarvis where is Clint?”

“Sir, Mr. Barton wants me to tell you that he is not leaving his room unless you apologize to for and I quote “ruining my virgin eyes, I saw my mom and dad making out in the kitchen and MOM WAS MOANING”.”

“Tell Barton to show his ass in 5 minutes or he isn’t getting any food tonight or an upgrade on his gadgets,” Tony said while going to sit on his usual seat which was right next to an empty seat of his husband. Just one day that is all.

“Sir, Mr. Barton is on his way. And Thor he is begging for you to not eat everything before he gets down here”

Tony could hear a smirk behind that faceless voice. When did Jarvis become this great, Tony may never know?

The next day came and the production crew was already in the penthouse setting up their cameras and lights. The rest of the Avengers were in the common floor as this was only for the penthouse, meaning Tony and a Captain was required only for the shoot. But the said “Captain” still wasn’t back was the mission that he promised he will be back first thing in the morning and it was noon and Steve was nowhere to be found.

Tony was getting way to furious at his husband for leaving him at the end moment to do this alone when he promised that this will be something they do together like all the things they do. As Tony was about to plan all the ways he will murder his husband, his phone buzzed indicating that Tony received a text. Of course, it was Steve telling how terribly sorry he was and how will be in the tower in the next 10 mins. Tony didn’t bother replying, he’ll say everything on his mind after the shoot is over thank you very much. He just wants Steve to get here, wash and look presentable for the camera for however long they needed to, and after that Tony can murder his husband in peace and quiet of their house. Tony will happily admit that made him smile.

“Okay, Mr.Stark we are ready. When shall we start?” Jenny, the producer asked politely.

“We’ll start in an hour. My husband is on his way back and we’ll need a few mins to set everything up.” Tony replied excitedly. This is what he wants, to show off their house and his husband.

Steve entered the tower in the next 8 mins and left the elevator in the next 9 mins. Not that Tony was counting he just wanted to make sure he didn’t have to kill his husband twice tonight, see he cares.

It took about 25 mins to get Steve to take a shower and wear the clothes Tony picked out for him. While Steve was getting ready Tony took the black roses that Steve so graciously brought, put them in a vase on his side table. It is a thing they did since they started dating, Steve would bring Tony flowers every time he could go for a run and Tony will place them all over the tower to show off how wrapped up Tony has got Steve, it’s a different level of bursting his ego.

“Okay Jenny, we are ready,” Tony called out for the producer as soon as he saw Steve in the kitchen all dressed up and looking so handsome that it should be illegal.

“Don’t you look beautiful my love?” Steve whispered in Tony’s ear with a small kiss on the skin behind his ear.

Tony just gave an umm in response to show Steve that flattery isn’t going to give him a pass this time. But he couldn’t help the smile that was crawling up his lips that he knew gave away more than he wanted to.

“Now this is where the magic happens,” Tony says to the camera as he opens the double french doors to their master bedroom. Steve's soft laugh can be heard behind him.

“This isn’t the only place where the magic happens.” Steve helpful adds to Tony’s surprise. WHY IS HE SURPRISED. STEVE IS AN ASSHOLE AT TIMES AND HE LOVES THIS ASSHOLE ALL THE TIME.

“Steven Stark-Rogers please keep this kid-friendly.” Tony tried to go with hurt and betrayal in his voice but the laugh gave him away.

Tony started explaining all the different things he got from different designers, The rug, the side tables. the color, the sofa’s, the coffee table and the books.

“Uhh and my true love my vanity. I didn’t want a small dressing table with a small mirror. So Pepper and I went into talks with again the main designers of the whole penthouse Nate and Jeremiah, they gave the idea for a walk-in, not a closet, we’ll talk about that later but I walk in vanity that can fit six superheroes all at once. if you slide the wall on which this gorgeous gold mirror is hanging. Now, this is exclusive. I welcome you all to Tony Stark-Rogers vanity. I have it all arranged with things I use in the morning, at night, special occasions, galas, my jewelry,my hand, my face, wet products, dry ones, masks every mask has its own place, makeup that I use daily, the interview ones, the date nights one. Everything here has it’s place and is stacked ever so nicely that sometimes I just want to cry at the engineering of this.”

Tony went on and on about his vanity and he could feel Steve watching him with a fond smile and that face he makes filled with love and affection wherever he hears Tony talk with so much joy,

“There are a few things that are strong enough to pamper a super-soldier too, whenever he lets me pamper him that is,” Tony says as he walks out of his vanity and gives a kiss on Steve’s cheek.

“Now let me take you to another heaven on this very floor,” Tony says all dramatically making Steve double with laughter he really loves this man to death.

“Feast your eyes on the collection I like to call TONY STARK-ROGERS ft Steve Stark-Rogers,” Tony says as he opens yet another double french door. What can he say Tony like drama and dramatic entrance is the.

The closet was huge filled with clothes, sunglasses, bags, shoes, had a whole coffee table with armchairs, refrigerator, and mirrors.

“This part belongs to Steve” Tony pointed the not too small but very small compared to the rest of the room part, “AND ALL OF THIS BELONGS TO ME,” Tony said we a big grin on his face.

After the long tour of the closet, the went back into the room to close o the interview.

“Steve do you have anything to add on our house tour, anything about how amazing job I did with our room and house,” Tony asked Steve as he made home and fixed himself beside Steve under his arms. Tony being only 5′8 and Steve 6′2 he barely reached his husband's shoulder which was okay because they fit like a puzzle and Tony could wear sexy heels and torture his husband,

“Hey, it’s your room I just get to sleep in there if I behave enough. And you did a wonderful job as always with everything you do my love,” Steve said and he leans down to kiss his husband sweetly.

The day the interview was posted. Everyone went crazy at how cute the power couple are actually, about how amazing Tony’s interior designing is and of course #MomTony was treading everywhere.

#stevetony #stony #my writing #stony fanfiction #stony fic #steve/tony #fanfic #superhusbands #superhusbands edits #stony-spn #steve rogers x tony stark

123 notes · View notes

overwatch-does-stuff · 4 years

Text

Lindholm Family Headcanon Dump!

I know Michael Chu retracted the statement that Torbjorn has a bunch of kids, but Chu just quit so I make the rules now. It’s a LONG post under the cut because I got carried away. Mostly starring Torbjorn, but featuring Ingrid, Reinhardt, and Brigitte (plus a bunch of other kiddos that exist but I don’t have headcanon names for yet oops.) There won’t be any Bastion in this one because that’s an entire other post’s worth of content.

- Torb has a big family. He and Ingrid had a couple children of their own while he had a stable position in Overwatch, but they found out that they loved having little children around the house, so after all of their biological children moved out, they chose to volunteer in the foster system! This lead to them adopting at least four more kids. - Which means they drive a huge van everywhere. - Both Ingrid and Torbjorn are masters at driving as a result. - They’re exactly equivalent in skill with one exception: Ingrid can parallel park the van, a skill he has yet to figure.

- Their house is pretty big (the Overwatch paycheck paid well, that, along with Ingrid’s income,) so there’s plenty of room for all of them. - There’s three levels: upstairs (for the bedrooms and playrooms,) downstairs (for entertaining spaces/the kitchen and stuff,) and finally, the basement, which is Torbjorn’s personal workshop. - Most third world countries would kill to have a workshop as good as his. - It’s all because Ingrid spoils him so much. He gets just as excited for Christmas as his kiddos do. - “The latest arc welder? Aww, honey, you shouldn’t have!” - Ingrid doesn’t work in his field, but she listens to his special interests dumps, and puts in enough research of her own, that she knows just what to get him every year. - Ingrid doesn’t like getting gifts as much as he does, so for Christmas, he always makes sure to spend quality time with her. He jokes that he ‘sucks at planning dates’ but he really doesn’t! For her, it’s nothing but the top restaurants and most exciting experiences. She loves going ice skating in particular, something that he hates but will always do with her. - Torbjorn and Ingrid split the cooking equally. They’re a bit traditionally gendered with what they like to cook, with Torb leaning more towards grilling and Ingrid preferring baking, but it suits them just fine. - Their grill, along with every other cooking contraption in the house, has been upgraded in some way. In fact, Torb’s the one who grills only because Ingrid still can’t figure out how to use the damn thing since he upgraded it. - Their house is covered in contraptions of all sorts. Other than the grill, Ingrid utilizes every single one of them. Meals get served and sent around via chutes. The floors sweep and mop themselves automatically when they’re dirty. The dishwasher loads, washes, and unloads itself in record time. - You know the zany contraptions in the Addam’s family house? Think that, but more brightly colored. - However, Ingrid’s taste in interior decorating is the opposite of gothic or minimalist- she loves quirky, unique features and bright colors. - She loves thrifting. - The huge chair they got for Reinhardt in the living room was a thrift store find that she’s still very proud of. - She also has an old-fashioned “live laugh love” wall with all of the family portraits. She knows it’s cheesy, but it’s nostalgic for her. - She doesn’t just bring furniture home. She also brings home cats. - That’s right. Brigitte got her cat love from Ingrid. - It’s a long-standing tradition, with the first cat she brought home was over thirty years ago when they were a new couple. - Torbjorn swore that it would be her cat and that he wouldn’t take care of it. - He was wrong. - Very wrong. - He now loves his cats and calls them cutesy nicknames in whatever language he feels like in the moment. - He built them automated feeders, automated litter boxes, and even some automated toys. He spoils them rotten. - Every time Ingrid brings home a new cat it’s the same routine. He swears that this will be the last one and that he’s not taking care of this one! But that’s wrong and he knows it. - But, because Ingrid’s always bringing things home, she’s a little more tolerant when Torbjorn brings. . . a specific Omnic. . . home.

- But that’s a whole other fanfic that I would need to write, so instead, back to the parenting! - Ingrid is 100% a feral soccer mom. Torbjorn is just as bad. - They’re the ones screaming their lungs out at sports games. - They have a house rule where their kids have to participate in one extracurricular sport. It can be school teams, club teams, or even just working out on their own, but fitness is something that both Ingrid and Torb consider important. - Torbjorn, of course, built his own gym in the basement. He trained with Brigitte, and now he trains with another one of his daughters who’s taken an interest in weight-lifting. - But this all doesn’t mean that the Lindholms discourage more creative talents! - Torbjorn crafted a giant steel board where any arts and crafts get hung with magnets. One of his little boys is an artist and he couldn’t be more proud. - Brigitte experimented with metal art when she was a teenager, and many of her pieces are now permanent fixtures in the Lindholm home. - She crafted a particularly beautiful string of lights that hangs above the dining room table.

- Now it’s time for Uncle Reinhardt!!! - Okay, so maybe he’s called just ‘Reinhardt’ by the older kiddos, but everyone knows he’s essentially an uncle in all but blood. - He’s been invited to every holiday celebration for about. . . actually, he’s just always been there. - He’s a true multi-generational staple. Brigitte can’t remember a holiday without him, and now the younger kiddos are getting doted on by him every Christmas. - Rein loves telling stories for the children. He spends the entire car ride there planning his multi-hour epics. - Now that she’s older, Brigitte sometimes helps with the storytelling, contributing sound effects and such. - Something which just causes Torbjorn to laugh and shake his head. - Reinhardt also loves nothing more than being a walking jungle gym. As soon as he walks in the door, he’ll grab the nearest kiddo and put them on his shoulders. He’s often seen walking around with a kid in each arm and usually an extra hanging off his back. - Sometimes he gives Ingrid a heart attack when he starts throwing kids around, but hey, she’s known him long enough at this point that she (mostly) trusts him. - Everyone gets sad when Reinhardt has to leave, but he insists that there is justice that needs to be done. He soothes the kiddos by promising an even better story when he gets back.

- Now it’s time to get sad. . . here’s my Brigitte headcanons. . . - Brigitte was REALLY close with her father growing up. She spent so much of her time in his workshop learning from him, as one of the only Lindholm children to take a liking to machinery and engineering. - However, when she moved out. . . she found it difficult to escape his legacy. Everyone, many of the older industry professionals and the like, expected her to be just like her father. They tried to cajole her into finishing old weapons designs that Torbjorn had abandoned. - It was then that she learned the full extent of Torbjorn’s involvement in the Omnic Crisis. - She had a lot of trouble reconciling this news with her love for him. It’s still something she had great difficulty with. - This shock played a big part in her decision to give up on finding a job in the industry and instead accompany Reinhardt on his travels. - It wasn’t a decision that Torbjorn endorsed, which hurt their relationship even further. - But it’s not like he doesn’t try to keep in touch. They call every other weekend or so to catch up, but there’s always a tension between them that neither one is ready to address. - They will talk about it someday. They’ll figure things out. They care about each other too much for either one to give up. - In the meantime, though, Brigitte has gotten a lot closer with her mother. She calls her much more often. - They talk about all of the things that Brigitte wasn’t all that interested in when she was younger. Stuff like fashion, makeup, and more traditional advice, such as how to get a date or what it feels like to fall in love. - Ingrid also makes sure to show her how the cats are doing over the online call.

- To be truthful, Ingrid isn’t too worried about Brigitte’s decision to live the rough-and-tumble lifestyle. It reminds her a lot of her own young adulthood, where she decided to pick up everything and move to the big city to get away from her parents. - She’s quick to remind Torbjorn that her own little rebellion is how they came to meet whenever he gets worried about Brigitte’s decision. - (They met at Ironclad. The only job Ingrid could find after her big move was working secretary. She fell head-over-heels for him immediately, while it took him a while to warm up.) - (Their first date was just walking around the city, with Torbjorn talking almost the entire time about random things he saw. He’d see the newest cars on the street and dive into what he knew about that industry. They’d pass by a construction sight and he’d point out what tool designs were similar to the ones he was working on.) - (When he realized that she was actually listening to him and taking him seriously, he agreed to a second date and never looked back.) - They aren’t a perfect couple- they’ve had their fair share of arguments, especially because they’re both deeply stubborn, but they’re always able to work it out in a way that makes them both happy. That skill is why they’ve lasted so long. - One thing they’ve never argued about, though, is Torbjorn’s commitment to duty. When they started dating he made it clear that his work was very important to him. Ingrid made it clear that she was willing to be patient. - It got hard when he was away for months at a time with Overwatch during the Crisis and its aftermath, but through constant online calls they managed. - The biggest surprise of Ingrid’s life was when he told her he wanted to have kids when the Crisis ended. - Turns out, having a major life crisis about how your career impacted the world makes someone want to find another purpose in life besides their career. - And thus, they dove into parenthood together. - Now they both couldn’t be happier :)

#overwatch #torbjorn lindholm #overwatch torbjorn #ingrid lindholm #reinhardt #overwatch brigitte #brigitte lindholm #I have so many feelings about Torbjorn and his family. . .#I'm not sure this is very articulate but eh #who cares #it's content

30 notes · View notes

softboywriting · 5 years

Text

The Perfect Arrangement

Summary: When your father, the king of the southern kingdom, arranges for you to marry the werewolf prince of the northern kingdom to create an alliance, you are less than thrilled. The last thing you expect is to actually fall in love and find a better home than you left behind. Will things go as planned, or will this alliance come crumbling down around you? Will you choose love or your family? [fluff] [royal au] [werewolf au]

Word count: 19k

|Masterlist In Bio|

Astoria is beautiful this time of year. The trees are all turning bright shades of orange, red and yellow. Under any other circumstances you'd be thrilled to be visiting such a beautiful place. But now, today, you're driving toward a future here. A future you didn't choose for yourself and one you cannot change.

Your dad, the King of Highwater, made a lot of enemies on his way to the throne. You were only a baby when your family took the royal position in the Southern kingdom. Twenty three years later and he's trying to make amends with those he turned against. But to do so he needs allies and there is no ally more powerful or larger than the Northern wolf kingdom of Astoria, and what better way to solidify an ally than to marry into their family.

When you were eighteen your older sister, the favorite child, married a man in the east who was set to take the throne of the Eastern kingdom. Danielle was always the pride and joy of your family. She was the prettiest, smartest and highest sought after woman in the South. Your parents doted on her, gave her everything. Danielle was a princess through and through and you...well you just did your own thing. You didn't have to worry about being princess like, and that was just fine. You hated all that proper royal hullabaloo and stayed out of it. Until now.

Two weeks ago your dad announced during a dinner that you would be sent to Astoria and expected to marry the prince. It came out of nowhere and completely shook your world. Never did you think that your dad would try to marry you off for an alliance. It's wasn’t unheard of but...you weren't a princess. Well you were technically, but you weren't a princess that anyone wanted to be a queen one day. You tried to fight your dad on it, arguing that you were not the way to go with the alliance, that you had no idea what you were doing. He gave you a choice. Don't marry into the North and put all of your people at risk, or do it and create an alliance. You couldn't risk anyone's life, so you took the deal.

So now you are in the back of a car on an eight hour ride from Highwater to Astoria. You've never met this prince before, your kingdom didn't generally interact with the wolves of Astoria. Your father was never keen on the wolves, which surprised you even more when he said he wanted you to marry one. Their king is supposedly a hardened man who rules with an iron fist and takes no shit, having been the king in Astoria for more than thirty years. You're terrified of what the prince maybe like. You've heard his name is Shawn but you didn't go exploring much farther. You have no idea how old he is, what he looks like or what he has done. You were too nervous to look into anything. Now you sort of wish you had, not knowing is absolutely so much worse.

The car winds through the hills of beautiful trees and old brick homes. The castle looms in the distance, a gorgeous white stone structure. Your new home. The car enters locked gates and circles a large courtyard minutes later and stops before a set of steps where there are two people waiting for you. Your heart feels like it's going to beat out of your chest.

The two people walk down the steps and you can see it is an older middle aged woman, beautiful as can be, the queen no doubt, and a young man. He is handsome, stunning as he walks the queen down the steps with a hand on her arm. He's tall, lean but fit and as he gets closer you can see the resemblance between him and the queen. He must be her son, but surely he isn't the prince you're meant to marry. He is far too gorgeous not to be married. He can't be the prince you’re meant to marry.

You step out of the car and grip your bag strap across your body nervously. "Hello," you smile at the two before you. The prince is just as handsome as you thought, not perfect, no, but far more attractive then any of the men you’d met in Highwater.

"You must be the princess." The Queen says stepping forward and holding out one delicately manicured hand. "I'm Karen, the Queen of Astoria."

You introduce yourself, and she smiles sweetly. "Thank you for having me."

"Of course. We're excited to have you, Astoria hasn't had a princess in this castle since I was young. A human princess will be a breath of fresh air around here." Karen guides the man beside her forward. He hasn't said anything, just eyed you silently. "Shawn, you haven't introduce yourself."

Shawn. This was the prince, the man you would call your husband soon. He steps forward so he’s standing before you a foot or less away. He is so much more than you expected. Breathtaking honestly. Surely this is a mistake.

"Princess." He takes your hand and kisses it, eyes locked on yours in a very commanding gaze. "It's nice to meet you, I’m Shawn, Prince of Astoria."

"I- yeah." You shake your head and look away from him. He’s too much, you’re screwed. "Thank you?"

Shawn raises his eyebrows and the Queen chuckles. "Come, let's get you settled in," Karen says, putting her hand on your shoulder and rubbing softly. “We’ve got dinner prepared and everything.”

______________________

Dinner is wonderful, and the Queen is an incredible lady. The King didn't make an appearance and you are told he is out of the kingdom for trade negotiations with the West. The night is winding down, you had arrived late in the evening as it was. Shawn was quiet for the majority of dinner, watching you carefully and you couldn't help but feel uneasy but not unsafe. He seemed distant and unsure, thought you couldn’t blame him. He was in the same boat as you were.

“Shawn, why don’t you show her to her room?” Karen says as she finishes her after dinner tea. “I’m sure she’s tired from traveling. Right dear?”

You nod and fold your hands in your lap. It was so strange to eat with people who were not your family. You feel like every move you make is under scrutiny. Nobody trained you for this, nobody showed you how to be a proper lady. You really hope you’re doing a good job.

Shawn pushes back his chair and walks around beside you. “Follow me.”

You get up and Karen smiles and gives you a little wave. “Try to realx,” she chuckles “Astoria welcomes you.”

“Thank you,” you nod and Shawn puts his hand out for you to take. You put your hand in his and he walks you out of the dining room.

The halls of the castle are a delicate blend of modern design and historical architecture. The structure is clearly old, having stood for decades no doubt. It’s not at all like Highwater castle which was far more recent in terms of construction. But Highwater was not nearly as old as Astoria.

"This is our room." Shawn says as he opens a set of large double doors. He steps in and you follow so he can close the door behind him. He goes to the dresser and casually starts to take off his watch and bracelets.

You turn to face him in the expansive bedroom suite. "Did you say our room?"

"Mmhmm."

"Why...why are we sharing a room?"

Shawn turns and pulls his shirt off over his head, revealing his trained chest and you can't help the blush that creeps across your cheeks. This had to be a fever dream, you must be sitting in the garden back home experiencing sun stroke. "Wolves share everything with their partners. It's important to building a bond."

You go over to the side of the massive bed and look at the plush rug covering the dark polished wood floor. There are little scratches, like claw marks in the polished wood. You swallow, putting the thought of why claw marks would be there out of your head. Shawn was fine. A little closed off perhaps but he didn't seem inherently dangerous. You were not your dad. You wouldn’t assume things of wolves, it wasn’t fair.

"I guess I can sleep on the floor."

"You can sleep on the bed." He shucks his pants and you really try not to look over at him, not quite used to the familiarity of changing in front of one another, but you do look. He's got a lovely ass, muscled and rounded just right in his fitted red boxers. You look away.

"Why would you sleep on the floor?" he asks as he stretches his arms across his chest.

"I'm not comfortable sleeping with someone I've just met?"

"I'm your fiance. You're going to sleep with me a lot."

"But...nevermind." You shake your head. He just didn't get it and you assume it's because he had different socialization as a werewolf. You open the top drawer of the dresser you figure is yours. Inside is your pajamas, unpacked and put away by the cleaning staff you assume. You take your clothes and head to the attached bathroom, closing the door behind you.

The bathroom is beautiful. It was as if there wasn't a single less than outstanding part of this castle. Shawn's bathroom, no, your bathroom, is black and white themed. White tiled floors with swirled black and white marble counters. A marble tub and black tiles along the walls and floors of the shower. Even the towels match the theme, and it's all lit by a skylight overhead with ivy growing around the edges of it. This bathroom was straight out of a home design magazine and you couldn't be more thrilled.

The freestanding tub is definitely inviting with its curved back and gold fixtures. You could spend hours in that thing reading your favorite books. Maybe living in the Astoria castle wasn't going to be so bad, for sure it has been a massive upgrade from your place back home.

You change into your pajamas, a pair of polka dot shorts and a t-shirt. It wasn't really fitting for the cool northern weather, but you hadn't exactly known what to expect. Though you should have remembered that the North was always colder, and didn't usually get much warmer than seventy degrees in the summer months, and it was fall.

You know you have to go back out there and face Shawn. You look into the mirror at your reflection and sigh. How on earth did you end up here with a prince like Shawn? Surely you did something right, some Gods must be smiling on you. You fix up your hair a bit and splash your face with water. You can do this. You can make the best of any situation if you put your mind to it.

Shawn is asleep in the bed, arm over his face, when you open the door to step out. He's on top of the blankets, legs open, one knee bent up and to the side with his arm over his chest. He looks so comfortable and relaxed. Must be nice. You grab a pillow and make yourself comfortable on the floor. It was going to be a long night.

_____________________

The first thing you learn about Shawn is that he's so damn quiet it's almost unnatural. Well. It is technically. In the first week he scares you at least a dozen times. It's not on purpose, but you think he gets a thrill out of it because he always does this face, just a little hint of a smirk like he is testing you or something.

On your eighth day you discover the library and the garden it lead to. The library is huge, floor to ceiling with books of all sorts. It would seem the family has collected them for many years. You love reading. It was an escape to worlds you could only imagine and dream of, and they made you feel things you were sure you'd never experience. Though now you think maybe with Shawn you will get to experience some of those things.

You grab a book, a romance novel from a shelf labeled "Karen's favorites" and head out into the garden. The plants are still thriving, the flowers long gone but ivy and greenery living on around the trellises and arches. You stroll along, admiring the stone work that lines the raised beds. Each brick looks carefully carved with roses and peonies and leaves. You reach the center of the garden and there is a large sundial in a pond with benches surrounding it.

The air is nice, the sun comes out to warm your face as you take a seat. Peace and quiet. You open your book and start to read, legs crossed under you as you try to get lost in the world in your hands.

Growling puts you on edge. At first you ignore it, thinking it's nothing more than one of your mom's dogs. But then you realize you're not home and this is a kingdom of wolves. A cold chill runs through you as you close your book and look around the garden. There is no one else as far as you can see. The growling stops and you aren't sure if that's a good thing or not.

Suddenly you see movement, a dark and massive figure to your right and a huge dark brown wolf soars over the bench from the raised garden bed behind you. It lands in the pond and you let out a terrified yell, gripping your book for dear life. The thing is absolutely massive and you are sure it's going to hurt you.

"Go away!" You shout, holding up the book in defense. "I'll scream! They'll find you!"

The wolf splashes forward and you watch as it reaches the edge of the water. It's then it begins to lower it's head and curl into itself. Before your eyes the wolf becomes a human with wet dark hair plastered to his head.

"You took that pretty well." He looks up and you realize it's Shawn. He shakes his hair out and runs a hand through it.

"Shawn!" You drop your book and literally melt into the bench. "I thought you were going to kill me or something."

He chuckles. "No, I won't do that. You've never seen a wolf before have you?"

"No. Not like that, well, like you."

"I'm about as big as they come, so don't worry about seeing anything more terrifying." He stands up and water pours down him. He's naked as the day he was born and you get a full view of his goods. Apparently he has no modesty. “Also, if you see another wolf like me in the castle, please scream. Let someone know, draw attention to yourself.”

"I was about to scream because of you, so no problem."

Shawn walks over to you, wet feet slapping on the smooth stone pavers of the garden path. You keep your eyes trained on his and he squats down in front of you. "You scream immediately. Understand?" He waits for you to nod and you do. "There shouldn't be any other shifted wolves here. Ever. I'm an alpha so I can shift like that, and only alphas can. If there is another alpha in this castle, aside from my dad, you let me know. Please?"

"Y-yeah." You swallow thickly, no longer concerned about his nudity then you are about the way he's speaking. This was obviously some sort of test, or maybe a warning?

He lays his hand on your thigh and squeezes gently. "You can go back to reading now. I'll be in a meeting for most of the day." With that he stands and goes for the path that lead back toward the castle.

You look down at your book on the ground. Reading didn't seem appealing at the moment. You are still reeling from whatever the hell just happened. Clearly you had a lot to learn about wolves and this seemed to be just the tip of the iceberg.

____________________

"Tell me about your family."

You look up from your book to see Shawn where he's sitting not too far from you in the library. You're in a central area with couches and a desk for studying. You never heard him come in and you definitely didn't hear him approach the sitting area.

"My family?"

"Yes."

You close your book and set it aside. "What exactly do you want to know?"

Shawn stands and walks along the book shelves, pacing lazily as he speaks. "Your dad, what's he like?"

"He's okay. Kind of a jerk, but I just stay out of the way."

"Does he hurt you?"

"No. Gods no. He is very stubborn. Pig headed. His way or the highway y'know?"

"Mmmhmm." Shawn stops and leans against the desk. "Your mom?"

"She's okay too, very much like my dad."

"Do you have siblings?"

"One. My older sister Danielle. She's married to a lord already. She's not the greatest, really full of herself."

"You don't like your family much?"

You curl into the blanket you've laid across your lap earlier. It's very warm and almost looks handmade. "It's complicated, but no not really."

Shawn walks over and takes a seat beside you and lays his hand on your covered feet. It's very tender and possibly the gentlest you've seen him since you met. "You're not like other princesses I've met. It's not a bad thing. I was just curious as to why, that’s why I’m asking about your family."

"I wasn't raised like a princess. I mean I am one, I know. But Dani was the golden child. She is the whole package, pretty, smart, sought after. Our parents put everything into her, teaching her how to be a proper lady and educating her on everything from piano lessons to how to eat properly. I was just left to my own devices most of the time. No one really cared what I did."

Shawn smiles softly and your eyes widen. This had to be the first real smile you've seen and it's beautiful. "You just did what you wanted huh?"

"Yeah. I learned pretty quickly that my parents didn't pay attention to anything I did while Dani was around."

"And what did you do?"

"Mostly I explored the courtyards and went to the library. Sometimes I'd hang out in the woods behind castle or just wander around town."

Shawn smiles. "No trouble making?"

"No." You smile and he smiles bigger. "Though one time I did sneak frogs from the fountain in the courtyard into my mom's coat pockets because she made me mad."

He laughs, full on laughs and you can't help the giggle that comes out of you in response. "You're cute, bold, and cute."

"What about you? Do you have siblings?”

“No, I’m an only child. The only kids I knew growing up were the staff’s kids. My parents let them bring them to work sometimes. It was great, but you know how it is. People grow up and they grow apart.”

“Yeah. I didn’t have a lot of friends.” You shake your head and sigh. “My parents didn’t think I should play with the kids in town.”

“Wow. They kept you in the castle?”

“Usually. Danielle was my friend until she got older and started to really understand that she was a princess. I swear when she turned thirteen her whole demeanor changed and that's when I started hating her.”

“I’m so sorry.” He looks down. “I didn’t mean to bring up a sore subject.”

“No, no, it's fine. It’s over now right? I’m here, living a whole new life. Astoria is a fresh start. What about you? I’m sure you’ve got some stories me from your childhood."

"Another time." He pats your legs and stands up. "I have some business to attend to right now. I'll see you tonight."

"Oh. Okay, yeah." You watch as he walks away, leaving you alone with your books. He was an enigma, but one you were slowly starting to unravel.

_____________________

Shawn doesn't come to bed that night. You wait up, expecting him any time after ten. You even take a bath for the first time in that tub of yours. You had held off, unsure when would be a good time not to be interrupted and to be honest you were nervous because it was so exposed, right in the middle of the bathroom. If Shawn walked in, which he didn't seem like he'd ever really do, he would be able to see everything. The bath had been just as amazing as you imagined. You curl up on the bed instead of the floor afterwards and read for a few minutes before falling asleep.

You dream of Shawn. He's a wolf, bigger than he was in real life and you ride on his back through the woods. There's something in the distance, a fire it seems. He's running towards it but you want to turn back. The trees end abruptly and before you is the castle you grew up in, burning to the ground. You grip his fur tightly and make no move to do something about the fire, as if you could do something anyways. A noise from behind startles you and you turn with Shawn to see a large wolf approaching from the dark forest, it lunges and you wake up, sitting up right in the dark bedroom.

The bed remains empty. You push back a blanket across your lap. You don't remember covering up before you fell asleep and the lights had definitely been on. You can't shake the feeling that somehow the wolf in the dream and your burning home in Highwater we're omens of some sort. They felt too real.

You crawl off the bed and your feet land on the cold floor. Your rug is gone. The cleaning crew must have taken it to wash. You grab your robe from it's hook by the dresser and head for the door. The moment you lay your hand on the curved handle, a voice breaks the silence of the room.

"Where are you going?"

A chill runs down your spine and you squint in the darkness to see where the voice was coming from. "I'm going to the library."

A light comes on and you see Shawn sitting on the floor beside his side of the bed. "At two in the morning?" He sounds rough.

"I had a nightmare. I just need to read for a bit and I'll be tired again. Why are you sleeping on the floor?"

"I'm on the floor because you were in bed." He pushes himself up and walks over to the door with you. "I thought I'd let you have some good sleep for once. I know you're still not comfortable sleeping with me."

"Oh. Well you can go back to sleep. I'm just going to the library like I said."

"I'll come with."

"It's just the library. It's fine."

Shawn puts his hand on your lower back and guides you out the door. "I'm going with."

The library is dark and Shawn goes for the lights, finding them with absolutely no trouble though they are along the wall to the left from the main doors. You can’t help but wonder how he does that. You go for your book you leave on the table between the sitting areas. You purposely leave a sticky note on it so the cleaning crew won't put it away. Shawn goes to a couch and flops down, feet hanging over the end as he crosses his arms and closes his eyes. You take a seat on an armchair beside him and open your book.

An hour passes, the large clock near the entryway chimes as it strikes three in the morning. Time flies when you're engrossed in the romantic world of life on a ranch with a hot new ranch hand. Shawn is snoring away and you wonder why he felt the need to go with you if he was just going to sleep. You aren't tired yet but you decide to go back to the bedroom. Shawn stirs when you get up to put your book back on its table. He says nothing and follows you back to the bedroom.

"I'll take the floor." You say softly as he falls on the bed face first.

"Just sleep on the bed." He mumbles into the comforter. "I don't bite."

"You might." You go to your side and crawl on, one knee sinking into the plush mattress.

Shawn pushes himself up and crawls under the blankets, laying so he's facing you on his side. "I won't even touch you without permission."

You lean back into the pillows and look over at him. His sleepy eyes are half lidded and golden amber colored like they were the first time you saw his wolf form. He’s so...interesting.

"Can we talk tomorrow?"

"I'll see. I have meetings with my dad all day."

"What are your meetings about?"

Shawn shifts against the sheets and pulls his pillow down to wrap his arms around. "Governing stuff. Really boring."

"Should I go to these meetings too?"

"No. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, honey." He growls softly. "Go to sleep."

Honey. Your stomach flutters. You lean over him and turn off his bedside light before settling down under the fluffy black comforter. You aren't going to sleep well, mind not yet off the dream despite reading and now his pet name is also running through your head. This sucked.

_____________________

"What're you doing today?" Shawn asks as he gets dressed a few days later.

You look over from the bed where you're still curled up. You and Shawn have started sharing the bed and it's much better than the floor. Go figure. "I don't know. Probably just going to read or maybe hang out in the kitchen with chef Marty. There isn't much else to do."

"Do you want to do something with me?"

You're surprised. He always seemed so busy. "Like what?"

Shawn turns around as he rolls up the sleeves of his button down shirt. "I thought we might go practice dancing."

"Dancing?"

"Yes. For the announcement ball? My mom told you about it right?"

"Well yeah but I have to dance? I don't really know how."

He chuckles. "I'll teach you. Wear something comfortable and meet me in the ballroom in a few minutes."

You roll over in bed as he leaves. Great. You couldn't dance, well, you could a little bit. But in general you could barely walk without tripping sometimes. Oh well.

You meet Shawn in the huge empty ballroom after putting on a pair of yoga pants and a tee shirt, not bothering to do your hair or anything else. It's crazy how Shawn looks like he belongs in the place. Always well dressed, looking like a real prince. You feel like you must stick out.

"You came," he smiles and your heart flutters. His smile is so damn beautiful. "I thought I was going to have to dance alone."

"You don't have to dance alone, but you will have to teach me a little."

Shawn turns on a radio he's got sitting a few feet away and a beautiful piano ballad begins playing, the acoustics of the ballroom making it louder and seem like it's a live piece of music. He walks up to you and puts his hand on your waist, taking your other in his free hand. "Follow my lead."

You swallow thickly at the closeness. He smells so good, you're not sure what he wears but it's absolutely intoxicating.

"Breathe," he laughs, rubbing his hand up your side. "You're going to pass out and we haven't even started."

"Shit, sorry." You shake your head. Focus.

Shawn leans in close, looking down at you, eyes locked on yours. "Here we go." He steps to the right and you follow easily, letting him guide you to start.

The song picks up and you follow along naturally as he spins you and leads you around with his hands in yours in a very waltz like dance. You can't help but laugh and he does one last spin that ends with you against his chest.

You lay your hands on his chest as he holds your hips. "I can't believe I did it."

"You did." He smiles. "I can't believe how well you did since you said you can't dance. You most definitely can by the way."

"I'm surprised too. Maybe you're just a good teacher."

"Or maybe we're really good partners."

You flush as he leans in and presses his forehead to yours, heart beating wildly. "Can we do it again?" You ask softly.

"I'd love to. How about something a little faster?"

"Alright." You smile nervously and he pulls away to go to the radio. An uptempo dance melody comes on and he takes your hands.

"Follow me." He steps back and you step forward in time with the music, footsteps getting increasingly faster as you go back and forth, side to side, hips turning as you change hands. You stumble a few times but he patiently starts over and guides you along.

Once you have the main steps down, he pulls you in and spins you so your back is against his chest. His hands slide down your arms and he turns you out again before the goosebumps can fully form on your skin. He does this two more times until you flow with him easily.

You slide into him as he pulls you in again, this time face to face. His hands go to your hips and he guides you back and forth with him. Your eyes are locked on his and it's insanely intimate. You can't speak, can't breath. He grabs your hips and lifts you up and you automatically wrap your legs around his waist. He holds you up with one arm as he guides you back against the column of the balcony overhead.

The music keeps playing but the two of you have stopped, frozen in time against the cool marble pillar. His breathing is heavy and so is yours. Your chemistry is undeniable. The tension is so thick you could suffocate.

"I wanna kiss you," he whispers, voice lower than usual.

You nod and he leans in, mouth warm against yours. His hand goes to your neck and he tilts your head up a bit. You grab his hair, and he growls into your mouth. A moan escapes you and he slides you down against the column, body trapped between his warmth and it's cool surface.

He breaks the kiss and you stare at each other. A smile creeps across your face and he breaks out into a little laugh. The two of you part ways, Shawn stepping back while you remain against the marble. He rubs the back of his neck and you bite your lip.

"You're a good dancer," you say softly and he chuckles, looking over at you and then down at his feet.

"You are too."

_____________________

You wake up a few days later to find a small package on your pillow. A rectangular box wrapped with a silky black ribbon. You sit up and look around the room. There is no sign of Shawn. The box has your name on it so you pull off the ribbon and lift the lid. Inside is a book. You turn it over in your hands and smile. The back cover describes a princess falling in love with a non royal werewolf and their forbidden romance. How similarly perfect for your current situation. You open the front page and there is a sticky note inside.

I picked up this book in hopes you would like it. I can only hope to be as good of a man to you as the wolf in this book is to his princess. Their romance is incredible and touching and everything I hope we can be someday. -Shawn

"Good morning."

You look up and Shawn is leaning against the bedroom door frame. "Good morning," you hold up the book. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. I thought you might enjoy it. I can take you to the book store one day if you like."

"Really? I'd love to go."

He walks across the room and sinks on to the bed. "I have a meeting this afternoon but I'll take you soon okay?"

You nod. "I can't wait."

_____________________

The next day Shawn finds you in the library by the window seats overlooking the garden. He walks over carrying one of your jackets.

"What's up?" You ask, looking over your book.

"You wanna go to the bookstore?"

“You’re serious?” Your eyes light up and you uncurl yourself from the window seat.

He holds out your jacket for you. "Yes, I promised you I would. It's chilly so I figured you might want this."

You pull it on and zip up the front. "I need shoes." You wiggles your toes in your socks and he chuckles. "I'll be right back!" You run across the library to the hall that leads to the stairs to your bedroom.

When you come back Shawn is waiting for you outside the library doors. He smiles at you and offers you his hand. You take it and he walks with you to the front doors. The two of you drive to the bookstore in downtown Astoria City. The second he parks the car you're gone, running into the small shop. He follows close behind, as you begin to walk the rows of books. It feels like it's been forever since you were in a place like this. The familiar smell of new pages, binding glue and fresh ink is like home to you.

"Good afternoon Prince Shawn!" A small older guy behind the counter says excitedly, waving at the two of you.

Shawn waves back and smiles. You grab his hand and drag him toward the romantic suspense section. "What can I get?"

"Anything you want."

"Anything?"

He laughs softly. "Yes, anything."

You start grabbing books, not even looking at their descriptions. You don't care, you will read anything by the authors you're grabbing. Shawn offers to hold some and you begin stacking them in his arms. He raises his eyebrows as you add more and more to the pile.

"You're sure?" You ask, holding one more book in your hands and staring at the stack he's holding. "You don't mind?"

"Of course not. Enjoy yourself." He carries the books to the counter and asks the clerk to start totaling them up and bagging them.

You sit down on the floor and browse the very bottom shelf. Shawn sits down behind you and you grab a few titles and hug them to your chest, falling back into his lap. He laughs, staring down at you and your books.

"Thank you so much for bringing me here."

He leans down and kisses your forehead. "I figured you needed some more books. I noticed you had started to reread them."

"You noticed that?"

He nods. "I've been reading a few myself, between meetings and after you've fallen asleep."

You giggle at the thought. "Prince Shawn is reading romance novels?"

He flushes a bit and rolls his eyes. "I figured it's something you enjoy, I should try it out too."

You sit up and look at him. He really did that. He really decided to start reading your books because you enjoyed them so much. "That's so sweet. I-I wish I could return the favor."

Shawn stands and helps you up with your last few books. "You don't have to worry about that."

"No, I want to know what you like."

"Well, I like playing piano, and I like taking long runs." He walks with you up to the counter and smiles at the clerk while he hands over his card and you place your last few books on the counter. "I like to read, before you came I did read as well."

"Well, I suppose I'm not too good at any of those things besides reading."

"No worries. I don't expect you to learn to play piano or start running with wolves overnight." He grabs your bag off the counter and you glance into it. There is at least fourteen titles in there.

You thread your fingers into Shawn's free hand and he kisses your knuckles. "Thank you. These will keep me busy for days."

"Anything to make you happy, Princess."

You flush and he swings your hands together as you leave the shop to return to the castle. You are happier than ever. You have new books and your relationship with Shawn is getting better every day. You don't feel like this is arranged at all. It feels like you and Shawn are just dating..

_____________________

For the next few days Shawn gets up very early, usually waking you up in the process and saying good morning with a kiss on your cheek. He always leaves, dressed in his pajamas and then appears a few hours later and heads for the shower.

Curiosity gets the best of you after a few days and you want to see where he's going. You wonder if he's shifting, since once he came back completely naked like he did when he shifted that time in the fountain.

On Wednesday you decide to follow him, camera in hand to try and get a picture of his wolf form. You're curious, you can't help it. He makes his way to the lower level at the back of the castle, past the garden and out a set of doors that lead to the private garages. You hang back, watching him from the window as he strips off his black tank top and shorts. Your suspicions turned out to be correct. He shifts into his wolf form, just as big as you remember, and walks into the treeline.

You zoom in on your camera and snap a picture. You stare at the little screen, enamoured with the way the sun highlights the red and brown colors in his dark fur. You want to touch it. Suddenly, fear grips your stomach. Why would he leave every day to go into the forest? Was he meeting someone? Another wolf? Was he really just running? Why was he doing this now?

You step away from the window and head back into the main part of the castle. You didn't mean to upset yourself like this, you just wanted to see him shift again. Now you're all in your head.

A couple hours go by and you see Shawn pass the library doors that you've left open. You decide to wait until he showers and gets dressed in his regular clothes to ask him what he's up to. It's not long after he passes the doors before you feel something on the back of the couch you're curled up on and you look up to see Shawn leaning against it, his big hands spread out across the cushion.

"Hello?"

"Why were you following me?"

You swallow thickly. Of course he noticed you were tailing him. "Uh...um."

"Hmm?"

"I was wondering what you were doing every day that required you to come back and shower."

He chuckles and walks around to sit on the coffee table in front of you. "And what did you find out?"

"That you are shifting and going into the forest to run I think, because you said you like to do that. I was just curious."

"You're curious? About what?"

You flush. "About you?"

He folds his arms over his chest and his arms look huge. You try not to let the thought of him picking you up like he had when you danced go to your head. Goodness he was so big and you know he's ridiculously strong. "You want to know why I've been going out running every morning?"

"Yeah."

"It's getting close to a full moon. I just need to stretch my legs and burn off some energy." He runs his hand over his hair. "I can...I can bring you along if you want?"

"Really?"

"Yeah. You're curious right? I want you to be comfortable with me in both forms. I know we've spent a lot of time together like this but not so much when I've been shifted."

You set your book aside. "When are you gonna go next?"

"We can go right now if you want. I'll show you where I go in the forest. I think you'll like it."

You stand up and he offers his hand to you. You take it and you feel warm, butterflies in your stomach. Every time he touched you, you felt incredibly alive. This isn't at all how you expected this conversation to go. This is much better.

____________________

If someone told you weeks ago that you would be running through an Astorian forest in fifty degree weather with a wolf at your side, you would have called them crazy. But here you are.

Shawn runs ahead as you start to get tired. Running isn't your forte. You watch as he bounds across fallen trees and boulders. It's the most carefree you think you've seen him yet. He doubles back and circles you, bumping your back with his head to get you to move faster.

"I'm tired," you laugh, pushing at his massive head. Standing, he comes up to your chest. His size was no joke and he could easily overpower you if he wanted, but he won’t. "I'm not running anymore."

He nudges you again and you stumble forward.

"Shawn." You grab his huge face and it's the most surreal thing as you stare at him, knowing behind those eyes is the man you're falling for. "I'm not a wolf, my stamina sucks."

He turns and walks ahead, leading you off the path. There's a cluster of rocks and you can hear water trickling somewhere close by. Shawn disappears and you hear a splash. When you get to a gap in the rocks you see Shawn, human again, treading water in the middle of a large spring.

"Oh wow, this is amazing." You lay your hand on the smooth damp rocks that enclose the water. "Incredible."

"I knew you'd like it. I come here after running to chill out for a while and just relax." He swims over to the edge. "It's warm. Come on in."

"I didn't bring a bathing suit."

"Who needs one? Just strip down and get in."

You pull off your sweater and push down your jeans. Being naked in front of Shawn wasn't something you'd done yet despite your growing closeness. Of course you've seen every inch of him, but he had a very different view of modesty. You still changed in the room with your back to him or in the bathroom.

"I'll just wear my underwear and bra." You put your clothes off to the side and Shawn swims over to look up at you. He smiles and you flush, knowing he's definitely checking you out. "What?"

"You're hesitant aren't you?"

"Of course I am."

"I can turn away if you want to get naked and get in so I can't see anything."

"I'll be fine."

"But you'll have to walk back in wet underwear and it's cold out here."

You sigh. He has a point. "Okay, turn around." You undress completely and get in the warm water beside him, sinking in and going under for a moment. He turns, eyes low as he takes in what he can see of you and you flush. "What now?"

"Are you still curious?"

"About what?"

"Me." He floats closer. "I'm curious about you."

"O-oh."

Shawn pushes a wet strand of hair off your forehead. "Let me know if I'm being too forward. Are you uncomfortable?"

You shake your head. "I'm not used to attention like this...and we haven't really done anything since we kissed when we were dancing."

"I know. Can I touch you?" He asks and you nod. He puts his hands on your waist and runs them up and down. "You can touch me too."

You lay your hand on his chest and it's solid, warm, and you take note of little freckles scattered across his skin. He's broad, much bigger than you, and being this close and naked is so different then when you were dancing. It's intimate in a different way.

"I didn't think I'd like you," you confess suddenly, eyes trained on his chest.

He chuckles. "Why?"

"Because arranged marriages don't usually work out."

"I know I took a while to open up, and that's because I didn't want to rush you. I really think you and I are good together though, great actually."

You smile and laugh to yourself. "Your mom said that too."

"Mmm," he slides his hands up your back and you arch forward, breasts hitting his chest. "Have you heard of the term mates before?"

"Like soulmates?"

"Yeah, something like that," he smiles into his words and you flush. "It's a special bond for wolves, and is what I'm pretty sure humans base the idea of soulmates on."

"Mates for wolves can be humans?"

He nods and cups your face. "Yes, definitely."

You slide your hands down his chest and he cups the back of your head, pulling you against him. You slip your arms around his middle and he lets out a soft hum. The two of you stay in your comfortable embrace for a while, enjoying the new found closeness with each other. You're glad your dad sent you to Astoria, if he hadn't you never would have met Shawn.

_____________________

The next day you decide today you're going to leave the castle and explore Astoria's shopping district on your own, eager to learn more about your new home. The trip to the bookstore was enough to get that itch for exploration in your bones. On your way to the front doors you pass a guard who stops you just as you get there.

"Princess, you need an escort."

"An escort? Why? I'm just going in town."

"Prince Shawn's rules."

You sigh. "Okay, well, who can escort me?"

"Prince Shawn."

"Really? I can't take a guard with me?"

The guard shakes his head. "No ma'am. We're under strict orders. You can't go out without protection."

"Why?" You cross your arms. You don't like being trapped.

"That is not for me to discuss Princess."

You turn away and head for the library. There was a gate you could get out of in the garden. You would go into town one way or another and you sure as hell were not waiting for Shawn to take you anywhere. He was in meetings all day again.

Sure enough the garden gate is guarded too. You roll your eyes and take a left to a trellis that you can climb just out of sight from the gate. A few carefully placed steps and you're on the back lawn of the castle, free to explore the town as long as you sneak around the guards out front.

Half an hour later and you're walking through the streets of Astoria City. The place is busy, bustling with life. There are vendors everywhere as if there is some sort of open air market going on. You wander around taking your time at each stall. You didn't bring any money, in fact you completely forgot your purse. It's fine. Window shopping was just as satisfying.

You approach a booth selling bracelets made of copper like the ones Shawn wore. They're gorgeous, shiny rose colored and intricately designed. You wish you could get one for Shawn. He'd probably really like it, and it would be a sweet gift in return for the books he got you. Just as you pick one up that has a braided design on it, a hand lands on your side and you jump.

"Beautiful isn't it?"

You turn and see a man with dark hair smiling at you. He's close to your age and not bad looking. He's big like Shawn and that makes you worry about what type of wolf he is. "Yeah. It's nice." You place the bracelet back in it's display and pull away from the man's touch to the other side of the booth.

"Would you like one?"

"Ah, no. I'm just browsing."

"Browsing alone?"

You pick up a necklace with your fingertips, admiring it's inlaid obsidian centerpiece, the stone of the royal family. You want to seem disinterested in the man's conversation so he will leave. He's making you extremely uneasy.

"A princess shouldn't be alone."

You swallow thickly and turn to look at him. He's gone, replaced by a woman who is looking at a bracelet. Your eyes dart around the crowd and you don't see him. This couldn't be good. You place the necklace on its stand and leave the booth, hightailing it back to the castle as fast as you can in the throngs of people.

Arms wrap around you just as you slip past the gates and before you can scream you hear a familiar voice. "What are you doing out here?" It's Shawn.

"I-I just wanted to get out of the castle."

Shawn keeps his arm around your back and walks the rest of the way with you up the driveway that leads to the castle's front courtyard. "I can't believe you snuck out. Well, no, I can. You realize that you put yourself in danger?"

"You can't trap me in the castle."

Shawn growls, pulling you aside in the main hall and holding your shoulders firmly. "I'm not trapping you. There are wolves in this kingdom who will try to take you. You're not in Highwater anymore, you can't go unnoticed here."

"Take me? Why?"

"Because you're my fiance. There are people who would do anything to get the upper hand on family right now. Dad and I are undergoing negotiations with other wolves in the north beyond the forests. They’re wild, part of Astoria but never following my dad’s rule. We’re trying to come to terms with them. That's why I have meetings all the time."

"Why didn't you tell me before? Why don’t I know these things?"

"I wanted to protect you, I didn’t want to drag you into all the political bullshit but clearly I just put you in further danger." You look around and Shawn holds your face. "What are you looking for?"

"Nothing, I'm just nervous."

"Oh." Shawn lessens his hold on you and drops his hands to your arms. He looks worried, genuinely concerned. "I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be angry with you. You didn’t know. Please, just...just stay in the castle."

"Okay, I will. For now, but I want to explore soon."

"I promise you I'll take you out again." He cups your face and it's gentle, a loving caress. "Promise you won't sneak out or try to leave without me again until things settle down?"

"I promise."

______________________

Two days later you wake up abruptly to Shawn pinning you down to the bed. Immediately you panic. You thrash under him and he holds fast until you start crying, begging him to let go of you. At that he releases your arms and sits up, thighs bracketing your hips.

"Are you awake?"

"Yes!" You shove him and he doesn't move. He's so much bigger than you and it sucks. "Get off me."

"You were screaming in your sleep and when I tried to wake you up, you started attacking me." Shawn runs a hand over his hair. "I didn't want you to hurt yourself. I was freaking out."

"Oh. I...didn't realize."

Shawn crawls off of you and lays on his back. "You scared the shit out of me."

"I'm sorry. I just had a horrible dream. It's fine, just a nightmare."

"Talk to me about it."

"I don't remember."

Shawn turns his head to look at you and you look away. "You're lying. Why don't you just tell me?"

"I'm not lying."

"You are." He lays his hand on your arm. "You always look away from me when you're lying. You never look me in the eye. What is the big deal if it's just a dream?"

You sigh heavily. "At the market the other day I saw a wolf."

This gets his attention and he rolls onto his side to fully face you. He looks irritated already. "Like shifted or something? Because there isn't a lot of alphas in Astoria."

"No not shifted. He was big like you and he approached me in a stall I was checking out. He knew I was a princess and I was alone. I think he was chasing me in my dream."

"What? Why didn't you tell me?"

"You were already mad at me for sneaking out and I didn't want to make it worse."

Shawn gets up and goes to the window that overlooks the garden. "That wolf was probably from beyond the forest. Remember what I said about someone possibly wanting to take you? What did he say to you?"

"Not much, he just asked me about the bracelet I was looking at and asked if I wanted it. He asked if I was alone and then said princesses shouldn't be alone. After that he disappeared and I left."

"Fuck." Shawn closes the curtains. "He is probably looking for a way to get into the castle. How did you sneak out that day?"

"I went through the garden, over a trellis."

Shawn pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes. The tension is rolling off of him in waves and you can't help but feel like you've really screwed up somehow. "We need to alert the guards and have them start searching the castle."

You twist your hands in your blanket and swallow hard. "Why? What is going on? Did I do something wrong?"

Shawn walks over to you and sits on the bed. He takes your hand and you can feel that he's burning up. He was always warm when he slept and he was generally warmer than you, but this was something different. "That wolf knew you had to of snuck out of the castle if he knew you were alone. He got close to you to get your scent so he could find out how you, a princess, got out without being noticed. He was looking for a way in."

"Oh. I fucked up huh?" You tremble, your dream coming back to you. A man shifting into a big gray wolf and chasing you through the castle, running as fast as you can to get to a hiding place, not knowing your way around suddenly. "I'm so sorry Shawn. I didn't know...I just wanted to go out."

"It's okay." He brushes his hand over your hair. "It won't be the first time someone sneaks in. We'll take care of it."

"What if he's already here? What if he takes me?"

"I would never let that happen. I'll protect you to my last breath." He wipes some tears that fall down your cheeks. "I swear I'll keep you safe."

"Thank you," you mumble, hand in his and he leans forward and kisses your forehead.

"I'm going to go alert the guards. Stay here and lock the door." He gets up and puts on a shirt from his dresser. "And I know it might be hard but you should get some more sleep. I'll see you when you wake up okay?"

"Y-yeah."

"Lock it after me."

You get up and go to the door, holding it open for him. He pauses and lays his hand on your cheek, kissing the opposite one before going out for you to lock the door behind him.

_____________________

The search for intruders comes up empty over the next three days and you're glad. If something had happened you don't know if you would be able to live with the guilt of knowing it was your fault. You wander around in the afternoon, looking for Shawn since you hadn't seen him since last night. He didn't say good morning or anything which was odd.

You hear the sound of a piano playing somewhere near where you're exploring. You think it might be coming from the grand hall. Sure enough there is Shawn sitting at a huge piano, playing a soft melody. Was there anything he couldn't do? You know he said he likes to play, but he just seems so perfect already it is unreal.

"Hey," he looks over at you as you cross the vast empty room. "What're you doing here?"

"I came to find you. You didn't say good morning."

As you get closer you take in his appearance. He's in a sweater and some jeans. He rarely dressed so casual unless he was planning on shifting, and he actually looks super soft and cuddly.

"Sorry. I've been in my head for the last few days."

"Because of the wolf at the market?"

He nods and scoots over on the bench for you to take a seat. "It really worries me."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

"It's fine."

There's a silence between the two of you as he plays a few notes. You feel like you've fucked up. Even though nothing has happened, you feel like Shawn is mad at you.

"You smell really good today." He says softly out of nowhere.

"Thanks. I don't think anyone's ever told me that."

"You always smell good." He looks over with a little smile. "It's a big deal for us wolves. Scents are everything."

"I'm glad I don't stink then."

He laughs and you duck your head and smile. "Can I tell you something else?"

"Sure?"

"I like when you wear my clothes."

"You noticed that I took a shirt the other day?"

He nods. "Like I said, scents are a big deal. When you walked into the dining room for breakfast I about pounced on you."

"Over a shirt?" You giggle.

"No, over my scent on you. It just drove me wild for a moment."

"Oh. Well, you smell really good too. I like your cologne that you wear everyday."

He plays a few keys and mumbles, "I just really like you."

You flush and look away to stare at the white keys. "I really like you too."

_____________________

Your family would be arriving soon for you and Shawn's announcement ball. It's a huge formal event that includes dancing and a dinner for both parties families and other important figures in the kingdoms. You aren't particularly excited to see your parents, it's been really nice being away from home and being paid attention to here in Astoria. At home it had been nice to do whatever you wanted, but your parents didn't actually seem to care about you and when they did pay attention it was usually to criticize you. Here, Shawn is definitely into you and you're very much into him. Even his parents really like you and you love the castle.

The worst part of your parents coming to visit is that they will be bringing Danielle. Just her, not her husband as far as you know. You almost want to rub it in her face that you got Shawn. Even if it is arranged, you do actually have real feelings for him. He's much more handsome than her husband Jackson and overall a better man. You're sure she'll find some way to make everything about herself though.

You walk into the grand ballroom and take in the incredible architecture. You and Shawn had danced together in there not too long ago and you smile to yourself as you remember. There are a few staff members setting up tables and chairs for the guests who would be there in a few days time, but other then the tables obstructing the view, it's absolutely breathtaking. You walk around the outer ring, a balcony overhead. It reminds you of the ballroom from beauty and the beast and you wonder if the wedding will be held there. If not you might ask if it can be.

You go up to the center steps leading to a landing that goes out to a balcony that overlooks the garden. There are big double doors open and letting in the fall air. You step out and run your hand over the smooth stone railing and look down at the trees and plants that are starting to fade. Most of the leaves are gone and fallen, cleaned up and bagged a few days ago. You had grabbed a few to make a collage with before that happened though. It's hanging in the bedroom now, and Shawn loves it.

There is movement below you and you try to see what it is. There's something in the far area by the gate, slinking low to the ground. It's large and a flash of gray fur between the bricks makes your stomach churns. You know what it is. A wolf. As soon as it registers in your brain, the wolf looks at you.

You turn and look for the staff members in the ballroom but they're all gone. You start across the room, jogging quickly as to get away from the balcony to find Shawn as soon as possible. By the time you reach the big wooden doors you hear footsteps. Claws on the stone floors. You tug the left door open and start running.

"Shawn!" You scream, running as fast as you can. There is no way you're looking back. You don't need to, you can hear the wolf behind you. "Shawn!"

You take the main staircase two steps at a time and doing so bites you in the ass. You misstep and go sprawling on to the landing at the bottom, stomach colliding with the ledge of the last step and head bouncing off the floor. The big gray wolf stalks towards you, teeth bared and growl echoing in the entryway.

"Shawn!" You yell, coughing as the force hurts your chest from falling. You pick yourself up to run but your knees are skinned pink and raw. They feel tight and are resistant to moving and you're dizzy, vision spotty.

From the top of the adjacent stairs you see what looks like Shawn. He's shifted and running but he's not quick enough. White hot pain burns through your back and you collapse, head hitting a step. The last thing you see is a gray wolf standing over you growling before you black out.

You wake in your bedroom, the sky through the window is bright orange with the setting sun. You aren't sure how you got here and you're not sure what happened. You vaguely remember seeing a wolf that wasn't Shawn in the ballroom. No. Outside? Everything is fuzzy.

Beside you, Shawn is curled up, hand over yours at your side. Was it a dream? You move to sit up but you can't, a tight binding around your chest prevents you from moving very much.

"Shawn?" You wiggle your hand in his and his eyes open, gold and dilated. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." He closes his eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath. "Are you in pain?"

"No. I'd like to sit up though."

"You should just stay laying down for now." He leans up on his arm and pulls the blanket down your body and lifts up a white tee you're wearing. Your whole mid section is wrapped in gauze but somehow you don't feel any pain. "I'll have to change your wrap soon."

"What happened to me? I remember a wolf and I fell, and then my back burning and then nothing."

"A wolf broke into the castle. I'm not sure if it was the one you saw at the market but it chased you. He knocked you down and you were clawed in the process. I wasn't fast enough to get to you before him." He closes his eyes. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey," you lay your hand on his cheek. "I'm alive. That's what matters. I'm okay."

"I failed you. I promised I would keep you safe and I failed."

"Shawn. I'm okay. I don't even hurt right now. You fought him off didn't you?"

He looks down and nods. "I did, I tore him apart. But you...I'm sorry."

You guide his face up to yours and he looks broken. His eyes are searching yours, desperate to make this right. "You still saved me. That's what you should focus on."

"And I'll keep saving you." He lays his hand on your stomach. "This will never happen again."

"Nothing can be predicted."

"I know, but I can do my best to prevent a future breach." He sits up and crawls off the bed to walk around to your side. "I should check your bandage. Can I carry you to the bathroom?"

"Can you lift me?"

He smiles and chuckles softly. "You're cute." He slides an arm under your knees and one under your shoulders, lifting you up with ease. "You'd be amazed at how much I can lift, remember when we danced?"

"Yes." Your cheeks heat up. "Of course."

"I carried you with one arm, remember?" He chuckles softly.

"Oh yeah..." you smile softly. "I'm constantly amazed by you."

"I could say the same."

_____________________

Shawn is incredibly gentle with you. He sits you on a stool in the bathroom and carefully unwraps your torso from the cotton bandages. When the cool air hits the wounds you feel a tingling pain and cold wetness on your back.

"I'm going to wipe it down okay?" Shawn says softly, showing you the wet towel in his hand. "I promise I'll be careful. If I hurt you please tell me."

You nod and he goes to work, gently wiping your back clean of whatever was on there. It doesn't hurt as he's cleaning but when he's done you can definitely feel an ache. "It's starting to hurt."

"I know." Shawn picks up something off the counter and brings it around to show you. "I'm going to put this on you."

"What is it?" You take it and turn it over in your hands. It's a small jar, round and unlabeled. "Ointment?"

"It's a healing salve. Wolves use it when they get injured with silver."

"I don't understand."

Shawn takes the jar and opens it, walking back around behind you. "Werewolves are allergic to silver. If something silver cuts us or comes in contact with our skin for an extended period of time, it prevents our bodies from healing."

"So you just have open wounds?"

"Yes. But this salve will heal them and numb the pain."

"I wasn't hurt with silver though? And I'm not a wolf."

Shawn swipes some across your back with his finger tips. "I'm aware. It heals your body quickly as well. It’s like an all purpose ointment."

"Oh."

He finishes and grabs a roll of gauze to wrap your middle with. You keep your arms up while he secures the bandage and helps you get a clean large shirt on. When he's finished he holds your shoulders and stares down at you, still taller than you on the stool. "I'm so, so sorry."

"Stop apologizing. I'm going to be fine."

"But your parents will be here soon, and the wedding. You're going to be bandaged up. It's my fault."

"No one can see the bandages. It's not like my face got hurt. I’m sure I’ll be healed over in a week or two. Everything will be fine."

Shawn lays his hand on your cheek and cups your jaw. "I'm glad you don't hate me."

"Why would I hate you?"

"Because I couldn't protect you and I swore to you I would."

"Shawn. Stop." You lean into his hand. "You've been nothing but good to me and so what? Like I said I'm not dead. If you hadn't been there when you were I may have gotten seriously injured. I could have ended up somewhere with someone much worse and gotten hurt and been left to die. I could be miserable. I'm not miserable here, in fact I think I'd rather be here with you than ever go back to Highwater."

"Really?"

You stand with his help and move a bit to get accustomed to the stiffness of the bandaging. "Yes really. Here I am cared for, loved and appreciated. Your parents really seem to like me too. Back home I would go days without seeing my parents and when I did they had nothing to say to me but how I wasn't as good as my sister."

"Your parents sound horrible." Shawn wraps his arm around your shoulders and walks with you out of the bedroom to the hall. "You really want to have them visit before the wedding?"

"Not really, but what choice do I have? Our dads are making alliance negotiations. I'm the biggest pawn he has, though I don’t know what he expects me to do."

Shawn stops and comes around in front of you and holds your shoulders. "Do you want to marry me?"

"Yes."

"I know we've really been hitting it off and getting close and everything but...if you’re marrying me just for the alliance I don’t know if we should do it. I know it’s the arrangement but-"

"Hey," you cup his face and he looks at you with soft eyes. "I would still want to be with you even if the alliance fell through."

Shawn takes your hands and holds them in his delicately, kissing your knuckles. "I feel the same way." He presses his forehead against yours and you close your eyes. "Let's head down to dinner? I'm sure Mom will want to see you."

_____________________

"How is your back darling?" Karen asks half way through dinner. You look up, startled at the sudden conversation starter. The majority of the meal had been silent.

"It's good. Shawn put some ointment on it and it doesn't even hurt."

"The healing balm." She smiles. "He's all too familiar with that himself."

"Mom, please."

You smile at a clearly embarrassed Shawn. "Tell me more?"

"It's nothing."

Karen balks. "Nothing? He nearly died is what he did." You raise your eyebrows and Karen folds her hands readying herself to start telling Shawn's story. "When he was sixteen he picked a serious fight with a boy from the East. The son of a lord there and he nearly lost. The Eastern boy brought a silver dagger and got Shawn right in the lower stomach before Manny broke it up."

"Mom." Shawn holds his head in his hand. "She doesn't need to know what a dick I was."

"Oh psh." Karen rolls her eyes. "Anyway, that salve saved his life. He's got a nice scar to show for it too. Rare for wolves, but it's there."

You look to Shawn with wide eyes. You didn't really peg him as the type to pick fights. "Where is this scar?"

"My stomach, by my hip bones. I'll show you later."

"I'm surprised I haven't noticed it."

Shawn rolls his eyes. "I don't like to flaunt it. It's kind of embarrassing because it never would have happened if I wasn't being a dick."

"Everyone makes mistakes." You take your last bite of chicken on your plate and shrug. "I've done plenty of dumb things too."

_____________________

Two days later you decide to take a bath. Showers were good and all but your body aches and you just feel like you need a hot bath. You undress in the bathroom, carefully unwrapping the gauze from around your chest and wincing as it sticks to your wounds.

"Need help?"

You turn and Shawn is in the doorway in his pajama pants. "I-I got it."

"Let me help." He says softly, crossing the room and taking the balled up wrap from your hands. "I'll be careful." He unwinds the last few feet of gauze off your chest and sets the bandages in the trash.

"Thanks."

"Are you taking a shower?"

"A bath actually."

Shawn goes to the cupboard where the extra towels and first aid supplies are kept. He digs around for a second before bringing out a paper bag. "Start the water and I'll mix this up."

You get in the tub and turn on the water, sitting in the center of it so your tender skin doesn't touch the back. "What's in the bag?"

"It's a blend of herbs for body aches and wounds. Another thing wolves use when burned by silver or after fighting."

"Oh."

Shawn crosses the bathroom and sprinkles a good amount of the mixture in the bath. He swirls it around and you can see dried flower petals and little bits that look like oatmeal. The water turns a soft purple color and you relax as best you can without being able to lean back.

"Do you want me to stay?"

"You don't need to."

"I'd like to." Shawn cups his hand in the water and pours it over your back. It feels wonderful as the warm water flows over your tender skin. "If you don't mind."

"I don't mind." You yawn big and he keeps pouring water over your back.

"Do you want to try sleeping without the wrap on tonight?"

"Can I?"

He leans forward on his knees and touches your back gently. "I think we should probably let it breathe. You'll have to sleep on your stomach."

"That's fine."

"I'll stay up and make sure you don't roll over."

"Shawn, no, you need to sleep too."

"Shh." He pours more water over your back and you hang your head down, enjoying the sensation. The rest of the bath is quiet and he lets you finish up while he changes the bedding so you could sleep on fresh sheets after you were all soaked and clean. When you walk into the bedroom all dressed up in one of his tees and a pair of sweatpants you find he's made a little nest for you to lay in.

"What's this about?" You chuckle as you crawl between the pillows flanking either side of your half of the bed.

"It's roll guards." He flops on his side. "So I can sleep for a while and not have to keep a close eye on you at all times."

"I'm sure I'll be fine."

He leans over and kisses your head. "I'm sure you will be too."

_____________________

"That outfit isn't very flattering."

You look up from the book you're reading and standing before you is your sister. She's got her hair down and it's longer than you remember. She is also pregnant, a few months by the look of it.

"Danielle?"

"Yeah it’s me? Why are you wearing old jeans and a huge sweater? You're a princess and you should be dressed up for your future family. Do you let them see you like this?"

"It's just my clothes." You stand and she towers over you. In heels and pregnant. This woman never took a break. "What's wrong?"

"You look like a commoner. A dirty farm girl or something."

You look down at yourself and pull your sweater out a bit. It was one of Shawn's from the back of his drawer. You figured he wouldn't miss it too much and since it was big and roomy you were more comfortable without your bandages. "But it's comfortable."

"Ugh." Danielle rolls her eyes. "How did mom and dad ever pass you off as a princess to these people? Oh wait, they're animals, no wonder you fit in."

You ball your fists up and walk away from her without another word. You can't believe she's here already and if she is here then your parents must be as well. You stalk down the hall to the main entrance and sure enough your parents are standing there talking to Karen and Manny. You turn and go to the hall that leads to the kitchens. You want to find Shawn because dealing with your family alone is not going to go well.

Shawn is sitting on a counter in the kitchens eating a bowl of cereal laughing at something Marty, the head chef, said when you walk in. He knows something is wrong right away because he drops his bowl in the sink and walks over to you.

"You okay?" He gives you a once over real quick. "You look freaked out."

"My family is here." You cross your arms. "And Dani already came to insult me in the library."

"What? Why?"

"I don't know! She hates me. I guess I look like a dirty farm girl but that's okay, because apparently you're an animal."

Shawn growls. He pulls you into a hug. "Danielle can leave if she's going to call us animals and insult my fiance."

"Yeah, good luck. My parents will defend her to their graves." You wrap your arms around his back and he sways you gently. "I would say we should get revenge but she's pregnant."

"Someone is having a baby with her?"

"Yeah. Unfortunate bastard."

Shawn drops a kiss on your head and looks out the doors behind you. "I guess I should meet them huh?"

"I guess."

"Do I have to be nice?"

"That's up to you."

He growls and you pull your head from his chest. "Well let's go then."

_____________________

Dinner is a shit show. Your parents can't seem to talk about anything but Danielle and her baby on the way. You would think you weren't even getting married in a week. You're invisible as always.

"So we are just ecstatic that were going to be grandparents!" Your mom, April, says, beaming at Danielle. "We always knew someday that Danielle would have a baby. She’s just too stunning not to carry on the bloodline."

Shawn clenches his jaw and puts on the biggest smile. "Never expected much from your younger daughter then?"

Your mom looks over at Shawn and you look up from your food to asses the tension filled room. Shawn just keeps smiling as he awaits an answer.

"What does that mean?" April asks fake politely.

"You don't expect grandkids from us?"

"Well, I hope not."

Karen sets her glass down a little loudly and clears her throat. "Excuse me? You hope not?"

"Well a human and a werewolf have no business having children. It's just unnatural."

Shawn lets out a loud growl that clearly puts your family on edge as they shift uncomfortably in their seats.

"Unnatural?" Manny asks over a sip of his drink. "What's unnatural about cohabitation of races?"

"You know, come on Manny." Your dad, Thomas, chuckles nervously. "It's just not right. The children would be ....well, wolves just shouldn't intermingle with humans. It's always been that way."

"You sent your daughter here to build an alliance and you think so poorly of wolves? What do you think will happen when they have a child? You think she’d going to birth a puppy dog? My people are shapeshifters, we are not animals."

Thomas clears his throat and you stare at him, waiting to see how he talks his way out of this one. "We sent her to create an alliance, yes. But as for children, and intermingling of races, I have my opinions and you have yours."

"You expect my people to live and fight alongside a man who thinks nothing more of them than animals?"

"I expect them to uphold our agreement."

Manny scoffs and shakes his head. "Thomas, I think you need to find a better way to win my favor and alliance. Our deal is off."

"What?! I sent my daughter here to make sure we wouldn't have any issues! Your alliance is critical to me, my people could be attacked and we would have no defenses! I'm offering you my youngest daughter and crop shares!"

"Then offer me something better Thomas. My people will never obey me if I ally with a man like you for just a marriage and minor crop shares. Your alliance is nothing to me, and everything to you. I can get southern agriculture through other means. Thinking your daughter's hand would be enough to over rule your inherently racist mindset was a mistake."

Thomas stands and so does Shawn and Manny. "This is your fault girl!" He points at you, red in the face. "You were supposed to seal the deal you little bitch! What have you been doing here?!"

"Thomas!" April shouts, standing up as well.

Karen lays her hand on your shoulder, as if ready to protect you from your dad.

"I didn't do anything! You didn’t tell me what exactly I was supposed to be doing here. You sent me here for a marriage that I still don’t quite understand! What do you gain from me being here? What do you gain? Wait, I know! You got me out of Highwater and out of the castle because I’m a disappointment to you aren’t I? I’ll never be Danielle and I never want to be! Losing this deal is your fault!" You stand and look around at the angry wolves before you and you’re shaking. Years of pent up emotion is coming out right now and you’re not going to stop it. "If anything you ruined this yourself because you’re an asshole and everyone hates you!"

"Don't you talk back to me! I am your father, I am your k-"

"You are not my king!" Your voice falters and you hate it. "I will not return to Highwater, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. I renounce my title as princess."

Shawn moves close to you and puts his arm around your waist, heat rolling off him in droves. "You can stay with us." He presses a kiss to your head. "Stay with me. You're safe here."

"You're a traitor to our house!" Danielle exclaims. "You’re leaving to ally with a foregin kingdom. You could be sentenced for-"

Karen rises and sets her hand back on your shoulder, rubbing soothingly. "Astoria is a kingdom of non-extradition. She is safe here from outside law."

"Your move Thomas," Manny says calmly. "Make a wise one or you'll have another enemy before dawn."

_____________________

Shawn comes to bed late that night. You can't sleep until you know what's going on. Never in your life had you stood up to your dad like that and now the alliance deal was off and it did feel like it was your fault. It wasn't, no, it was the fault of your parents and their small mindedness of wolves.

"Hey," Shawn says softly as he enters the darkened room. "Are you still awake?"

"Yeah."

His weight sinks in the bed a bit and you roll towards him. "Are you worried about the argument at dinner?"

"How could I not be?"

His hand finds yours and you let him thread your fingers together. "You don't need to worry. I swear I'll keep you safe here in Astoria. I know the alliance deal is off and I guess that means we aren't technically engaged, but I won't stop caring for you."

"Oh..."

"What?"

"We aren't getting married in a few weeks anymore? All the planning your mom and I did, it's all for nothing now? I'm supposed to go to a dress fitting in a few days. I thought we agreed we would stay together in the event the alliance went bad?"

Shawn puts his arm over your stomach and you lay your hands on his warm skin. "You seriously want to marry me still?"

"Yes. How many times do I have to say that I want to be with you? I've gotten used to the idea that we’ll be mates, and I’ll get to wake up to you everyday, and I'll be the princess of Astoria. I never wanted to be a princess, but Astoria is wonderful and I'm really happy here. It's like...it's like I'm living in one of my favorite books but it’s real and you’re real. I’ve never felt more at home and more loved before and I don’t want to lose that.”

"I'd absolutely love for you to be my mine, alliance or not. I definitely think you and I are meant to be together. I don’t want to lose you either.”

You play with his arm, running your nails over his skin. He lets out a low rumble and you grin to yourself. You explore a bit more, hand going up his arm over his shoulder and to his head. You hesitate, fingers poised in his hair. He takes the initiative and leans his head into your hand. Your fingertips meet his warm scalp and you scratch gently, working up and down through the mess of hair on the top of his head.

Shawn lets out a tiny groan, more of a sigh almost. He curls the arm on your stomach around you and pulls you closer, careful of your back. He holds you flush against his chest and you melt into his warmth. He presses his face into your neck as you keep up your scratching. There are tiny little noises coming from him, things you'd never hear if he wasn't pressed against your neck. Little groans and whimpers, half caught in his throat growls. He is putty in your hands and you had no idea he could be so easily broken down.

"Shawn?" You ask after a few minutes, he has started to mouth at your neck, wet tongue leaving warm stripes up and down your skin. "Hey." His attention is making you feel warm, the idea of his tongue on your body going much farther than you should be thinking.

"Yes?" He growls, literally growls and you don't know why but that brings a whole new wave of arousal across your stomach.

"I think we should probably sleep."

"Mmm yeah, but you smell so good." He presses his nose against the back of your jaw. "It's going to be hard to sleep." He runs his hand over your stomach, fingers flexing across your skin where your shirt has ridden up and your bandage ends. "So soft."

You giggle as he tickles you with his fingertips and he chuckles. "Shawn, quit!"

He slides his hand away and rolls onto his back beside you. You instantly miss his warmth. "I'm going to shower." He says and gets off the bed. You watch his figure cross the dark room and he pauses at the bathroom door as the light comes on. He looks back at you before going in and closing the door.

Your heart is racing, pounding out of your chest. That was a very intimate exchange. Now all you can think about is his hands on you, his tongue, his body over yours. You have to stop. He's already aroused and you aren't going to help by being turned on still when he comes out of the shower.

_____________________

You and Shawn head down for breakfast late in the morning, knowing that everyone would be up as well. You know Shawn was up late after his shower because he left the room and didn't come back for a few hours. You're sure your family was up too, well, maybe not Danielle because she never did care about anything but herself. Chances are she doesn't give a fuck about the alliance. She's an Easterner now anyways.

"Look who finally showed up." Danielle says with an eye roll. "I guess I can eat now."

"Sorry?" You roll your eyes in return.

"What took you so long? Because you sure didn't clean yourself up before coming down here."

Shawn wraps his arms around your waist and kisses your cheek. "We were having a little fun.” He grins against your ear. It’s not true but he’s trying to rile her up and her expression says it’s working. “Besides, it's our home, if you don't like how we present ourselves you can leave."

Danielle scoffs and rolls her eyes. "I'd love to."

"Let me call you a cab, or maybe a b- witch like you prefers a broomstick?"

"Excuse me!" Danielle's eyes go wide and she looks to your parents as they walk in from an attached parlor with Shawn's parents.

"What's going on in here?" April asks, eyeing you suspiciously. "Are you bullying your sister?"

"Are you f-"

Shawn cuts you off. "We were just talking. She'd like to leave she says."

"You can't leave until we finish our business here," April says and takes a seat beside Danielle who just huffs and mumbles something under her breath about having someone come pick her up.

The kitchen staff brings in breakfast and begins to set up around you. It's a fairly large amount of food and you're not sure if it's all going to get eaten. Marty only knows how to cook for werewolves. If the food doesn't all get eaten, it goes to the staff for their families so at least you can feel less guilty about not finishing it all.

“How are things with the wild wolves?” Thomas asks as everyone begins to eat.

“Excellent. We made an agreement.” Manny says smugly. He knows why Thomas is asking and it’s because he thinks that he has a shot at negotiations if Manny is under pressure from outside forces.

“Good, good. Glad to hear it.” Thomas sounds drier than an empty bucket in the western desert.

A few minutes later Shawn bumps your hand with his. You look over and he’s grinning. "It's going to snow soon."

"Really?" Your eyes light up, glad for the change in conversation, and shift in the tension filling the room. You've never seen snow before, the south didn't get below freezing. "Can we go out in it?"

"Yeah of course. I'll go out and catch the first snowflakes with you when it does."

"Promise? Even if its the middle of the night?"

"I swear."

____________________

Your parents and Danielle leave without coming to an agreement with Manny. Things didn't get any worse, so Highwater isn't on bad terms with Astoria, but they are not allies either. You know your dad won't give up anything major and the only thing it seemed Manny would accept was open trade and expanding Astoria's border to grow more crops in the southern region. Your dad's dislike of wolves would never allow him to do that, and he would never approve of losing land to Astoria.

Two days after their departure you find yourself sitting in a boutique in Astoria City, waiting for one of the assistants to bring you dresses to try on.

"So you and Shawn are still getting married?" She had been visibly surprised when you came to find her this morning to go to the appointment.

"Yes. I haven't told my family yet since they left, I kind of don't want to."

"I understand. They're not at all like you. I was shocked when April said she hoped you never give her grandkids with Shawn. The way they spoke about us, it reminds me of when Astoria was still a small kingdom of wolves that people didn't understand." She sighs. "The way humans treated us was absolutely disgusting. To think that some people still have such a closed off mindset in this day and age."

"Yeah, I'm still nervous though."

"Why? Well, I mean anyone getting married is nervous."

"The seriousness of it all is a lot to handle."

The attendant brings you three long white dresses with silk accents. They're bulky looking and you already don't like them. "This is our most traditional dress style. All three are by a designer here in Astoria and-"

Karen holds her hand up. "Can we see some more non traditional dresses? Maybe some colors as well?"

"Colors?" The attendant looks to you and back to Karen. "For a royal wedding?"

"Yes. Our bride to be here is not your traditional type, and this won't be a traditional wedding."

"Yes ma'am." The attendant hurries off with the white dresses.

"I don't mind white." You say softly and Karen shakes her head. "It's really okay."

"No. Astoria is entering a new age and with it should come new traditions. I want it to be your choice, and your wedding, not your parents and not following any traditions you don't want to follow. I want you to be comfortable and not worried about it being some uptight affair."

"Thank you." You smile and look down. "It means a lot more than you know."

Karen pulls you into a side hug and leans her head on yours. "You're like the daughter I never had and the carefree princess I never got to be. I want the best for you."

____________________

"You're not technically a princess anymore right?" Shawn says as he walks out of the bathroom towel drying his hair, a second towel slung low around his hips.

"I guess I did renounce my title." You shrug and stand up to stretch, setting your book aside and staring at him. No matter how many times you saw him naked or nearly naked, you don't think you'll ever get used to it. "I guess you're going to be the prince who married the common girl."

He chuckles. "Not quite. You'll be a princess again when we get married."

"How? Marrying royals doesn't change your title."

"I'll coronate you. At the announcement ball tonight, I'll make you the princess of Astoria. I have a tiara picked out already." He smiles shyly and you flush. "It's a new too, not one of mom's."

"You chose it?"

"Yeah. Last night."

You walk over behind him and wrap your arms around his chest, pressing against his back. He's damp and smells like warm vanilla and spice from the shower. "Thank you."

"What's this about?" He chuckles, laying his hands over yours.

"I've never gotten a tiara before, and I've never felt like a princess."

Shawn turns around in your hold and plays with your hair. "Do you want to feel like a princess? Were you ever jealous of your sister?"

"I-I guess I was a little bit."

"I'll treat you like a princess." He drops his forehead to yours. "I'll give you everything you ever wanted."

"I don't want much." You giggle and he bumps your noses. "You've given me more than I've ever dreamed about having."

"I haven't given you much?"

"Love? Attention? Affection?" You run your hands up his bare back. "Protection."

"Oh." He rubs down your back in return. "I'm not sure about that last one."

"You're still beating yourself up about that? I'm nearly healed over. You took care of it."

"I know." He closes his eyes. "I still just can't help but feel like I failed you."

"Shawn." You hold his face, making him look at you. "Do you need me to forgive you? Do you need me to say that?"

He nods.

"I forgive you. I forgive you for everything you feel guilty for."

"Thank you," he whispers, pressing his forehead to yours. "You have no idea how much it helps."

"I'll forgive you everyday if I need to."

He lets out a little half laugh. "No, this is fine."

"Good." You kiss his nose. "Let's get ready for the announcement ball."

_____________________

You step into your dress and pull it up over your shoulders. It’s beautiful, a flowy long black dress with quarter sleeves made of soft lace. There is just enough tule beneath the skirt to give it shape while providing your legs room to move. It was one you picked out with Karen the day the two of you went dress shopping for the wedding. She had recommended getting one for the ball as well since you’d hadn’t gotten one yet.

One of Karen’s assistants, Millie, helped you get your hair and make up done but she had to leave before you got into your dress. You reach back, hand not quite touching the zipper. You can’t finish without someone to zip up your dress. You gather up the skirt and head for your bedroom, you know Shawn is probably getting ready still. He can help.

You knock on the door and wait. Sure enough the handle turns and there is Shawn, standing before you in a fitted black tux, jacket open and blue shirt half buttoned underneath. He looks so good, absolutely outstanding. You realize this is a sort of peek at what he’ll look like on your wedding day and you get jitters in your stomach.

“Hey,” he says softly, touching a curl falling from your temple. “Can I help you darling?”

“I need my dress zipped,” you flush, dropping your skirt and pointing to your back.

“Come in.” He opens the door and you shuffle in until he can close it. He walks over to you and runs his hands up your exposed back. “Your back does look really good.”

“Thanks.” You glance back and him and he’s smiling. “I wouldn't have healed so well if it weren’t for you.”

“Mmm,” he traces a faint scar from the deepest scratch. “The salve and all those herbal baths really made a difference. Your skin looks gorgeous.”

“Shawn,” you giggle and he pulls the zipper closed, looping the top little button to prevent it from pulling open while you danced later.

He wraps his arms around you from behind and rests his chin on your head. “I can’t wait for you to be my princess.”

“I thought I was already?”

He chuckles. “You’re right, I can’t wait for everyone else to know you’re my princess.”

You pull out of his hold and sit on the edge of the bed. “You should finish getting ready.”

_____________________

Your stomach twists into knots as you walk down the stairs from the upper balcony of the ballroom, hand in hand with Shawn. Below you can see all of the most important figures of the Astorian government and their families. There is no one from Highwater, not a single soul and that's the way you wanted it.

"Are you nervous?" Shawn whispers against your ear.

"Extremely."

"Don't worry. You'll have a good time. These are your people now."

The two of you reach the landing at the bottom of the stairs and stand beside Manny and Karen. A man announces the king and queen first and they step down, bowing to the crowd.

"I announce to you Prince Shawn Peter Raul Mendes, heir to the Astorian throne and his fiance..." The man looks at the sheet and over to you before he announces just your name and no title. He is clearly perplexed by the lack of title considering only days ago you were most definitely a princess.

Shawn steps forward and takes the microphone from the man and thanks him for his work. "Lords and Ladies, governors and governesses of Astoria, you'll notice my fiance is no longer a princess." He looks to you and takes your hand. "She has renounced her title and association with the royal family of Highwater."

A soft murmur breaks out across the quiet room and you feel nervous.

"I'd like you all to join me in coronating her as the Princess of Astoria." He grins and people begin to clap. A man walks up with a small white pillow that has a gold tiara adorned with diamonds and obsidian accents on it. It's absolutely stunning. Shawn lifts it off and steps up to you, the delicate adornment in his hands. "Bow your head for me."

You lean forward and Shawn places the tiara gently on your head. You raise back up and look at him as everyone begins to clap, the room explodes in cheers for you.

"How does it feel, Princess?" Shawn whispers with a smile.

"Weird?" You giggle.

He leans in and kisses your cheek. "Get used to it honey."

The rest of the ball is amazing. Everyone takes the time to meet you and congratulate you and Shawn on your engagement. It's incredible, feeling so involved and accepted by the people in charge of your new home. A woman named Alice, the daughter of the head of agriculture, hits it off with you right away.

"So how did you and Shawn meet?" Alice asks when you sit down beside her to take a rest for a bit.

"Um, well...it started out as an arrangement."

"Really?! I never would have thought the royal family would do that here in Astoria."

"It's kind of a long story, but I'm glad I came here. I'm glad I met Shawn." You look over where he's laughing at something with a group of people and you smile. "He's absolutely incredible. I'm so lucky."

"You really love him don't you?"

"I do." You let out a little laugh and pick at the table cloth, it was the first time you've really admitted that to anyone, even yourself. "I really do."

"That's amazing." Alice sighs. "Are you two going to be mates?"

"I think so."

"Are you going to make it official?"

You raise your eyebrows. "We're getting married? Is there more than that?"

Alice grins big. "Well since Shawn's an alpha, he'll claim you."

"Claim?"

"Do you know nothing about wolves?" She asks and you look down. She sets her hand over yours. "I didn't mean to sound so rude. I'll explain."

"Thank you."

"So basically, for a lack of better terms, Shawn's going to want to fuck you senseless."

Your eyes snap to hers and you flush hot. "Alice!"

"What? That's what wolves do! Mates are compatible pairs who are bonded physically. Usually resulting in a baby."

"A baby!?"

"Shh, jeez. You're so loud." Alice looks around and leans in close. "How did you think mates worked?"

"I-I don't know. Shawn didn't really explain it to me, he just said it was like soulmates."

Alice snorts. "Soulmates. That invisible bond that humans supposedly have to another human they've never met? Yeah. Right. Wolves take mates physically. Once he's...inside you...you'll always have his scent on you."

"I-"

"Shawn probably didn't say anything about it because he didn't want to freak you out. He's probably planning on it happening naturally."

"As opposed to unnaturally?"

"No, as opposed to planned."

"Oh."

"Anyway, yeah. But you're getting married and you love him. So a baby is naturally the next step right?"

You nod. Honestly you hadn't thought about kids. Not since the conversation with your family about Danielle. The look on your parents' faces when you tell them you are going to have a child by Shawn...oh the horror. Serves them right. Hell, they'd probably be appalled if you told them you were still marrying Shawn despite the alliance. Who cares though? They left you here where you wanted to be. You have no loyalty to them.

"I need to go talk to Shawn." You excuse yourself and walk out onto the dancefloor to find your fiance.

Shawn actually finds you before you find him. He pulls you aside behind one of the pillars and takes your hands in his. "How's it going?"

"Good. Um, actually, can we talk about something?"

"Anything."

"I was talking to Alice about being mates and-"

"She told you." He sighs softly. "I swear to you I won't push you into anything you don't want. If having a kid isn't what you want, I can just say you're my mate. I'll use condoms. We don't have to-"

"Shawn." You grab his face. "Relax. I just wanted to know if that's the only way to be mated."

"Yeah. I mean, it's okay. I should have told you. I know we haven't discussed the whole sex part of our relationship n detail and honestly if you don't want to ever do it, I understand. I won't think any less of you."

You smile softly and just stare at the nervous man before you. He's so sweet. "I want to have sex with you, for the record. I do trust you and I plan on marrying you next week after all."

"Oh good." He sighs in relief. "Because I really want to as well."

You let out a laugh and he chuckles along with you. "Well now we've settled that. Will you dance with me?"

"Any time." He takes your hands and steps out from behind the pillar. "I'll lead the way, princess."

____________________

The day before the wedding, you and Shawn are separated. It’s some sort of superstitious tradition. You don't like it and you spend most of the day trying to stay calm. You got the bedroom at least, your room with Shawn, so you had everything to remind you of him. All day you spent being fussed over and you’re exhausted. It's after midnight but you can't sleep. If you just had Shawn you could relax.

You roll over for the dozenth time in an hour. Something in the window catches your eye. A flashing from across the garden. You crawl out of bed and pull back the curtain to get a better look. Across the garden in the window parallel to yours, Shawn is standing there. He's got a flashlight and he is literally signalling to you. He stops once he sees you and you pull open the latch on the window. It's just wide enough for you to squeeze through. You fall down onto a hedge and slide behind it.

There are two guards in the garden at all times and you have to avoid them. You sneak around, staying low as you skirt the outer edge of the dying hedges. Keeping out of sight was hard since most of the greenery is gone now. It's also freezing cold outside and you are in your thin polka dot pajamas. There is a guard between you and Shawn's window and you aren't sure how to get rid of him, until you see a loose bit of paving stone on the ground. You grab the stone chunk and throw it toward the fountain. Your plan works and the guard goes to see what it is.

Shawn has the window open when you get to it. He hauls you up off the ground and you collapse on the floor of his temporary bedroom.

"You are absolutely insane." He laughs, staring at you on his floor. "I didn't think you'd sneak out the window! I was just going to try and talk in morse code."

You stand and brush yourself off. "I'm quite good at sneaking, not so good at morse code so that would never have worked. I'm absolutely freezing now."

Shawn latches the window and wraps his arms around you. His warmth seeps into your bones and you melt under his touch. "I couldn't sleep without you," he mutters into your hair.

"Me neither. I'm so nervous I can't relax."

"Me too."

The two of you walk to the bed and you crawl on it with him in front of you, pulling you into his chest. "We aren't supposed to see each other you know? It's bad luck supposedly."

"I don't care." You press your face into his shoulder. "I need you. Traditions be damned."

He runs his hand up and down your back. "I need you too."

"I think I can sleep now."

"Good. Not so nervous?"

"No. Well, just a little maybe."

He chuckles. "I promise tomorrow will go by easily. It's just you and me. Don't worry about anything else."

"I know."

He noses your hair and you relax. "You're my best friend. I can't wait to be your husband."

"You're my best friend too." You hold his hand over your chest. "I love you."

Shawn growls softly, curling around you tightly. "I love you too."

_____________________

Snowflakes. Little white glittering snowflakes catch your eye as they fall against the large glass windows behind the justice as he reads out your vows. You know you should be paying attention to what's being said, this is your wedding after all. But the snowflakes are something you've never seen, not in real life and they are all you can focus on.

Shawn squeezes your hands and your eyes snap to his, tearing away from the windows reluctantly. He gives you a look as if to ask what you are doing. You look back to the windows and then to him and he gets the idea.

"Snow." You mouth silently and look outside again.

A grin spreads across his face and he pulls you toward him, interrupting the justice and pulling you up the steps to the balcony of the ballroom. "I'm so sorry Justice Holland. But I made a promise and it's time to follow through."

You step out onto the balcony into the cold air. The little flakes fall onto your face and arms and you giggle. "It's snowing!" You grin, looking up at the sky.

Shawn tilts his head back and catches some snowflakes on his tongue. "I promised you I would catch the first ones with you."

You stick your tongue out and giggle as the cold little bits melt on you.

"Shawn, we need to finish the ceremony." Justice Holland says as he approaches the two of you.

Shawn wraps his arms around you and pulls you close. "I think we got the point." He brushes some snowflakes from your hair. "We just need to kiss."

"But-"

You lean up on your tiptoes and kiss him softly. It's perfect. The wind picks up and blows a swirl of snow around the two of you and you both laugh as it chills you to the bone. The justice looks resigned as you walk back into the ballroom.

"I pronounce you Prince and Princess of Astoria. Long may you love and reign in happiness and joy." Justice Holland sighs softly.

The crowd erupts in cheers and you and Shawn walk down the steps smiling and covered in snow. You couldn't be happier than this. A romance and love you never thought you would have is beginning before your very eyes. You couldn't be luckier.

_______________________

One year later

"Princess, I have news for you." Shawn sing songs as he walks into the library.

You look up from your book and quickly tuck it into the pillows on your window seat. "What's up?"

"Your father has stepped down from the throne of Highwater. He's realized he's outnumbered by the Astorian forces and our western allies. We're taking Highwater as of this morning."

Your eyes widen. For months your dad has been in negotiations with Manny for land and trade since the south had officially begun to fall apart under his rule. Things escalated with the bad blood between the two rulers and your dad declared war. It was a fruitless attempt to bully Manny into agreeing to his negotiations. Thomas had no idea the size of the Astorian forces or their allies. Today marked the end of that war, no bloodshed needed. Your dad had obviously come to his senses once he realized he could never win against the Northern and Western alliance.

"The south will be Astorian land, Highwater is ours."

"Ours?"

Shawn smiles and sits beside you. "Ours as a kingdom. My parents will be going to the castle to meet with the members of government there and decide what to do. We'll control Astoria proper until things are sorted out."

"That's insane." You laugh, shaking your head. "I can finally show you Highwater! I...I actually have some news for you too."

"Yeah?"

"Well," you smile and bite your lip. "Remember how we talked about remodeling the old nursery?"

Shawn raises his eyebrows. "Yes. I said as soon as you are pregnant we could do that."

"We should start remodeling then."

"But I just said-" his eyes go wide. "You're pregnant!"

"Yeah! Six weeks the doctor said. It's a rough estimate but yes!"

Shawn lays his hand on your stomach. "This is perfect. We can raise it in both of our home kingdoms." He closes his eyes. "This is the best news ever."

You take his hand and he leans in close. "Remember when you promised to give me everything I ever wanted?"

"Of course."

"I think you've made good on that now. I couldn't ask for more."

He presses his forehead to yours and bumps your noses together.

"Thank you for the happily ever after I never thought I'd have. I love you."

He presses a soft kiss to your lips and rubs your stomach gently. "I love you too princess. I love you too."

End

------

Than you so so much for reading! I know this was long but i hope it was so worth it :) Big shout out to everyone who’s helped me write this and gave me feedback in the process. I can’t wait to write more and bring yall more stories!

Please Reblog if you read, enjoyed, or just want to save for later!

Thank you again. You’re all amazing and so supportive. - A

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

#stories #werewolf au #royal au

2K notes · View notes

chilling-seavey · 4 years

Text

Anything But Mine (d.s.) - Chapter Twenty-Three

A/N: A chapter just in time for Daniel’s birthday! 🥰 Maybe I’ll post two to celebrate? 🤔

T/W: brief mention of abortion

Tuesday, July 28th, 2020

“Well it’s good to see you have some company this time around.”

Florence smiled at the doctor from her place on the white clinic bed. Her blouse was pushed up past her swollen stomach, the clear gel spread messily over her skin. Emilio stood on her other side, a gentle hand on Florence’s arm.

“So, thirty-five weeks, we got a solid heartbeat here.” The doctor stated, dragging the wand across the gel, the rapid rhythmic beating echoing gently through the room. Florence watched the screen with wide eyes, seeing the almost fully formed baby there.

“I think it has my nose.” Emilio whispered to her. She smacked his chest playfully.

“You didn’t want to find out the sex after all?” the doctor asked.

“I don’t know. I’m still on the fence.” Florence chuckled.

“No harm in that.” The doctor shrugged. She took a few notes on her paper as she checked the baby’s movement, breathing, muscle tone, and amount of amniotic fluid. The hour went by quickly and smoothly, filled with suggestions for the next month by the doctor in preparation for the birth. Florence held onto a few pamphlets she was handed as they left, Emilio leading her to the car as she flipped through them.

“Oh my God.” Florence sighed as Emilio helped her into the passenger side of his black BMW.

“What?” Emilio asked.

Florence shoved an open pamphlet in his face, a list of post-partum creams and routines listed in bold font. “I forgot my vagina turns into a post-apocalyptic world after birth.” She stated plainly.

“Ew, did not need that visual.” Emilio shuttered and gently pushed the pamphlet away from his face. He closed the passenger side door and let himself into the other side.

“And you bleed for like…six weeks straight.” Florence added as he reversed out of the parking spot.

“Way too much information.” Emilio shuttered. “Again, did not need to know that.”

Florence shrugged, looking back at the pamphlet in her hand.

The previous seven months had gone by fast and a lot had changed as well. Emilio and Grayson soon fell into a civil and friendly relationship, realizing they were both sort of stuck under the certain situation. Tensions had since eased and Florence felt more comfortable around both young men since everything had settled into a unique reality. She was still extremely nervous, however, as she was carrying around the silent burden of who was the father of her unborn child. It was a sticky spot to be in and the guilt she had was heavier than the twenty-five pounds she put on by the start of her third trimester.

Florence’s apartment was arguably the one consistent thing in her life. Although expecting her second child, she could not afford to upgrade to a three bedroom and was therefore stuck with the place she had. Callum was still sending a consistent amount each month for her rent which helped greatly.

Emilio parked in the underground garage beneath the apartment building and the two took the elevator to the familiar 25th floor. Grayson had already arrived earlier that morning, gladly offering his assistance in putting together the crib in the master bedroom. That’s right where Florence and Emilio found him, quiet music playing through a Bluetooth speaker as he sat on the floor surrounded by tools. Clementine sat nearby, a small plastic bowl of cut up strawberries set in front of her as she watched Grayson work.

“We’re back!” Emilio called, falling onto the neatly made bed on his stomach, glancing over Grayson’s work.

“How was it?” Grayson asked, looking up from the floor, pushing his messy hair back from his face. “Everything still okay?”

“Everything is perfect.” Florence nodded, setting her hands on his shoulders. “This looks great, Gray.”

“We’ve been working hard, haven’t we, Clem?” Grayson looked over to the eighteen-month-old who nodded excitedly.

“I knew I shouldn’t have gotten rid of the old one.” Florence sighed, sitting on the end of her bed.

“New is fun.” Emilio shrugged.

“I agree.” Grayson nodded, pressing the screwdriver into the last beam and turning it clockwise. Clementine crawled over to him, her small hands pressing onto his light blue pants with white stripes as she got herself to her feet. She reached for the screwdriver as Grayson pulled it back.

“All done!” he told her, tickling her sides.

“Please.” Clementine whined, reaching for the bright orange handle that he held behind his back.

“Grownups only, remember, Clemmy?” Grayson said, starting to pack up his tools.

“The nap was okay?” Florence asked as she picked up her daughter from climbing over Grayson.

“Yep. She slept a good hour. I got her up at 2.” He said, also getting up from the floor. “We’ve been having fun. She’s been a big help. I think she’s going to take after me with her building skills.”

Grayson tickled the toddler’s side and she giggled loudly, slinging her arms around her mother’s neck.

“We should get ready to head out.” Florence said as the group headed into the living room. “I’m going to throw on a dress.”

Clementine was passed over to Emilio and Grayson set his tool box on the kitchen island before unzipping his bag that was on the stool. He took out a new shirt and slacks and the two separated to different rooms to change in preparation for their plans for that night.

Once dressed and touched up, Florence came back into the living area where Emilio had Clementine situated on the floor with a puzzle. Puzzles were Clementine’s new favourite toy.

Florence set her purse on the island and shuffled through it, “So-“

“I got dinner at 5, bath at 5:30, and bedtime at 6 if you aren’t back.” Emilio finished without even looking up.

“And there’s-“

“Left over spaghetti in the box in the fridge and I should warm it up but make sure its not burning.” Emilio sent a small smirk in Florence’s direction.

“Yeah.” Florence sighed. “What would I do without either of you?”

“God only knows.” Grayson tisked playfully as he emerged from the bathroom dressed in a black t-shirt tucked into olive green slacks and finished with his usual designer belt. He set a hand on Florence’s shoulder, his other ruffling through his mess of brown waves.

“We’ll be back as soon as we can.” Florence said.

“Don’t rush.” Emilio assured her. “We are going to be just fine.”

“Like every time.” Grayson added.

“Tell mama that we’re fine.” Emilio whispered to Clementine.

“Fine, mama.” Clementine whispered through a grin, leaning into Emilio’s side.

“Now let’s get a move on. Daniel didn’t take it well the last time you were late for a meal with him, remember?” Grayson shook his keys in the air, ushering Florence towards the door.

“Wait! I can’t forget my pamphlets.” Florence grabbed the small stack from the table and rushed after him.

“Good luck.” Emilio said more to Grayson than anyone. The other boy rolled his eyes teasingly before closing the door behind himself and Florence.

It was approaching 4pm as they arrived at the restaurant, Grayson’s light blue Porsche earning many glances from on lookers as he handed the valet his keys and helped Florence into the building. The casual restaurant was bustling as the hostess led the pair to their table. Daniel was already there, sat next to a brunette girl on one side of the booth. The girl was named Cayleigh and she was Daniel’s new girlfriend.

They had been dating only a couple months, meeting near the end of the school year on an app that Florence didn’t care to know the name of. Cayleigh was a nice girl and Daniel seemed to really like her but there was something about the whole situation that just made Florence annoyed. She was not looking forward to sitting through an entire dinner with them and having to deal with Cayleigh’s overly chipper personality.

When Grayson and Florence got to the table, the friends greeted each other happily, Florence plastering on her best fake smile that she had perfected over the years of attending boring functions and dinners with her parents and brothers.

Cayleigh was quick to start with an excited, “How was your appointment today, Florence? I haven’t seen you in so long! You look like you’re ready to pop!”

Grayson shifted awkwardly at the slightly controversial statement and Florence gritted her teeth through her offence, replying with a simple, “It went well.”

While she was pregnant with Clementine, Florence’s body was going through massive changes for the first time, meaning she was barely showing well into her fifth month. Now, with a second child, Florence was shocked to see the difference in how easily her body stretched, the massive weight gain and large, round belly being a sensitive topic to the still young girl. Of course, having Cayleigh of all people point it out so bluntly made Florence’s cheeks flush with anger more than embarrassment. She covered it with a long drink from her water glass and hid her pamphlets deep in her purse.

“How have you two been?” Grayson asked, trying to turn the subject away from Florence as she was clearly already on edge and dinner hadn’t even begun.

“We’ve been fine.” Daniel said. “I’ve managed to pick up a few gigs around the city this summer.”

“And I’ve been working as a sports camp counsellor. It’s so fun.” Cayleigh boasted. “The kids are so crazy but literally relentless. Plus they all love me, so it’s good.”

“I wish we could see each other more but things have been busy.” Daniel said quietly, offering Florence a gentle smile from across the table. She could barely force one in return, her eyes focussed on the minimal space between the two love-birds across from her, Cayleigh’s hand rubbing against Daniel’s thigh. Florence drank more water.

Dinner progressed slowly, lighthearted chatter filling the space between the group of four as they ate. It had been a while since Florence and Daniel had a moment to talk once summer started, although their relationship was never quite the same after their little hiatus in the fall. She knew he was always there for her but things were simply different. Plus, Cayleigh coming into the picture put even more of a strain on their already weak relationship. At least from Florence’s point of view.

But Daniel adored Cayleigh and that was clear. They were almost never apart and whenever they were seen together they were always touching. It was like they couldn’t keep their hands or eyes off of each other. Daniel would stare at her when she spoke, seeming to absorb the way her lips moved and how her brown eyes would squeeze closed when she laughed. Florence hated that she noticed that.

She was glad Grayson was there, though. Even in their simply platonic standing, Grayson’s presence always made Florence feel calm. He told the group a story of how he had been getting into building in his spare time that summer. Grayson always spoke loudly, especially when he was excited about something and a few customers at other tables glanced their way as he continued his story of his recently constructed coffee table. Florence leaned into him, her hand falling to his leg. He shifted a little, almost in a movement to get Florence off of him but he didn’t miss a beat with his story. Florence frowned but turned quietly back to her meal.

Florence pushed the remining food around her plate with her fork before breaking the conversation with a gentle, “I have to pee.”

Grayson stopped his story and quickly got up from the table, letting her slide out of the booth ungracefully.

“I’ll join you!” Cayleigh said, getting up from the table as well.

Florence sent a small glare in Grayson’s direction but he merely smiled in response as he sat back down in his spot. The girls walked slowly across the dining room to the washroom and Cayleigh held open the door for them. Florence thanked her quietly before getting herself into a stall, having to wiggle her swollen stomach through the small door opening.

“Isn’t Daniel amazing?” Cayleigh spoke from the stall next to her.

Florence, now shielded by four walls, rolled her eyes, “He is.”

“He’s literally so sexy. I have no clue how you haven’t snatched him yet, girl.” Cayleigh’s voice echoed through the empty bathroom.

Florence’s eyes widened at her statement and she ran a hand over her face. The whole dinner was tiring her out. Cayleigh was tiring her out.

“We are only best friends and that’s all we’ll ever be.”

“So I don’t have to worry about you stealing him from me?” Cayleigh teased with a laugh although Florence could tell there was a hint of seriousness in her tone.

“No.” Florence could hear Grayson in her mind telling her to be nice. She then asked a question she could have cared less about, “How are you two doing?”

“So good!” Cayleigh’s groan made Florence physically cringe. “Although we haven’t slept together yet. I’ve been trying!”

Florence gaped at the stall door at the girl’s bluntness.

Cayleigh flushed and Florence heard her approach the sink as she continued, “I mean I don’t know why he won’t. Sleep with me that is. He’s a literal man, shouldn’t they want sex all the time?”

Florence exhaled deeply, wishing she could have just gone to the bathroom alone, but she got herself out to the sink as well, starting to wash her hands. She caught Cayleigh’s expectant gaze in the mirror.

Clearly wanting an answer, Florence complied, “Daniel is not much of a physical person. He shows love in different ways. Don’t take it personally if he’s not jumping in bed after three minutes.”

“I guess.” Cayleigh shrugged, pulling a tube of lipstick from her purse and applied a generous amount of pink to her pursed lips. She fluffed up her light brown hair and made a face in the mirror that reminded Florence of early pubescent girls. Florence glanced at herself in the mirror, stood next to such a unique character. Florence’s knee length blue floral dress was pulled tight around her belly, and her blonde hair hung loosely over her shoulders. She couldn’t help but compare herself to the happy, wild, free-living twenty-year-old girl beside her; the girl who’s biggest worry in life was why her celibate boyfriend didn’t want to sleep with her.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Cayleigh speaking through the mirror, “Okay but honestly though, have you seen Daniel’s fingers? Like, holy shit, can he put them to use yet?”

Florence forced a small laugh to hide her disgust, turning for the door so Grayson could keep her from screaming.

Much to her relief, dinner concluded not long after that, and with a quick one-armed hug from Daniel, Florence was back in the passenger seat of Grayson’s car. The exhausted sigh that she let out once the doors were closed made Grayson chuckle.

“That was awful.” Florence shifted in her seat, rubbing her hand over her belly.

“It wasn’t awful.” Grayson shrugged, pulling the car out of the parking lot.

“You didn’t hear what I heard in that bathroom trip.” Florence held her hands up. “I think I am traumatized.”

Grayson’s laugh filled the car and, like it always did, it made Florence crack a smile. She let her two hands intertwine on her lap, her gaze drifting out the window as the city lights zipped by.

“Well while you girls were bonding in the bathroom, Daniel and I had a nice chat.” Grayson spoke after a moment.

“That’s nice.” Florence said, not turning her attention from the window.

Grayson glanced at her before turning back to the road, “He asked how you were doing. Have you not been talking?”

“No.” Florence shrugged, nervously playing with the hem of her dress. “It hasn’t been the same. Not since Cayleigh is around. She takes all his time.”

“He says he misses you. That you haven’t been calling as much.” Grayson spoke gently.

“Because I don’t want to call him just to hear all the new details on his girlfriend and her new fucking lip gloss she bought.” Florence said sharper than intended.

“Why don’t you like Cayleigh?” he asked. “She’s nice.”

Florence held onto her two hands like it would save her life, “She’s taking him from me.”

“What do you mean?”

“We were starting to be better again and she took him away. Now we don’t talk anymore. I miss how things used to be, Gray.” Florence sniffled. “When I was pregnant with Clementine and there was no Matt and no drama and it was just Dani and me. And I was happy.”

Bright lights flooded the car as they pulled into the parking garage, Grayson’s soft sigh at her recently consistent tense emotions barely audible. He pulled into the parking space and put the car in park before turning to face her. The hormonal girl let out a soft sob into her hand.

“Are you not happy?” he asked quietly.

Florence took a trembling breath and shook her head slowly, almost ashamed at the admittance of it. “I keep hurting you. And that doesn’t make me happy. I’m stressed, Gray. So stressed. And I-I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself when this baby is born and one of you is going to get hurt. I can’t do this! I just want to go back in time and change so much! Change my choices and my actions and everything! Fuck! I wish none of this happened! I just want this baby gone!”

The panicked inhale that followed her sentence made her choke on her tears, her free hand tightly grabbing a fistful of her hair as almost to punish herself for admitting such a thing out loud.

Grayson simply watched her cry, staring at her expressionlessly. His silence made her heart ache in her chest and she tried to smother her ridiculous sobs into her hand. Grayson ran a hand through his hair, his gaze falling to his lap with a sigh.

“I-I should go.” Florence hiccupped, reaching for the door.

“No.” Grayson said quickly, reaching for her wrist to keep her from leaving. “I just…this is a lot. And I don’t know what to think or what to do. It’s hard on me too. On both of us.”

“I should have gotten a fucking abortion when I had the chance.” Florence grumbled angrily at herself.

“Don’t you dare say that.” Grayson replied sharply. “I’m allowed to still be hurt, you’re allowed to be upset, but you cannot say things like that. That is not how you better yourself and that is not how you solve this situation.”

Florence took a shaking breath and wiped her eyes with her the back of her hand as she turned away from him slightly.

“Everything is going to be okay.” Grayson whispered, but he sounded more like he was convincing himself rather than her.

Florence wanted to believe him, she really did; but even his gentle words of assurance didn’t spark comfort in the girl. She was stuck in her own mind, spiralling to where she felt she was unable to be saved. But she let herself stare at the wall of the parking garage, missing what life was like before everything changed.

#daniel seavey #wdw #why dont we #daniel seavey fanfic #why dont we fanfic #emilio martinez #martinez twins #limelight #martinator #daniel seavey fic #wdw fanfic #happy birthday daniel #jonah marais #jack avery #zach herron #corbyn besson #college!wdw #writing #anything but mine

14 notes · View notes

cutiecrates · 5 years

Text

September 2019 Lucky Treat!

Well here we are guys, finally! As it turns out, I was supposed to get this on my birthday (the 15th) and it came, but at the time I was taking a nap because I was gone most of the day and I felt really tired when I got home. So they showed up around 6pm but nobody answered the door, and since I had to sign for it they left.

This isn’t the first time this has happened, I somehow miss foreign packages I need to sign for <_< my mom and I argue over this every time, and as I expected it didn’t come the next day. I wasted 2-3 hours stalking the front door and not leaving the room at all for anything. So yesterday morning we picked it up, but it just wasn’t a good day to try to post this.

It’s also the reason why my next review hasn’t been posted but you can expect to see that later today. So for now, let’s focus on this!

As a reminder I won’t be reviewing these items due to them being sent for free. I’ll just be showing them and giving my opinions.

(Note the Kawaii Box I’m supposed to review in the background...)

Okay, so as you can see this is exactly how it arrived. I initially assumed it would be one large box, so I was actually relieved to see it consisted of 2 medium-sized boxes. Both were light weight and easy to carry.

Japan Haul, for anyone unfamiliar with the name or new to the blog is the online store belonging to the branding that makes Tokyo Treat, YumeTwins, NMNL. You can find a lot of the box items, as well as some unique items on there, which is why I try to recommend you check it out if you’re ever interested in the items from those boxes. There wasn’t any special papers or anything in the box, but each of them had an “order summery sheet“ and a sheet of protective Styrofoam on the bottom.

Before I begin I wanted to mention that usually there’s a “value“ depicted in the information or picture for the Lucky Treat, but this one didn’t have it. On each box it says their values were 1000yen, so combined I think that might be $200.00? I don’t know much about foreign currency so don’t quote me on it.

-------

Mew Plushie & Vulpix Plushie

Anyone who reads this blog knows that I am OBSESSED with Vulpix/Rokon- it was the reason I just had to have this box, and it hasn’t left my side since I opened the one it was inside. It was true love from the day we met; I have various Vulpix items, including a smaller plush from a KFC promotion when I was a kid, a couple toy items, stickers, coloring book pages, and several TCG cards in both English and Japanese~

About a year or so back they were featuring Vulpix (normal and Alola) in Japanese merch. I’ve always wanted to visit Japan, but that was probably when I wanted it the most.

The plush is pretty big (although I know in comparison to the Mew it doesn’t look it), it’s the perfect lap size~ It’s also very soft, with fluffy material for the hair and tails that is a combination of rose swirls and tufts. The tails are one solid piece with lines between them to give them the feel of individual pieces, but the curled portions are separated. I love love love love love it~

--------

So as you can tell, Vulpix isn’t the only plush we got in this months box :3 in fact we got a handful more to go- including this really big Mew Plush. Currently this is the second biggest Pokemon Plush I own, it’s a few inches taller than the piplup I won at the fair a few years back, but smaller than the Meowth I got when I was a kid.

This plush is made from the same fabric as the vulpix but lacks the fluffy hair accents. The sewn details are perfect, it’s feet are properly stuffed and a little floppy, while its super-long tail is sewn to the back, so I assume it would dangle if I cut the strings. He’s great for hugs.

Flaaffy Plushie & Mini Eeevee Plushie

We got 2 more Pokemon plushies, including this very small Flaaffy plush~ It’s like the Vulpix in which it has normal plush fabric, and slightly softer fabric for the wool on its neck and head. It’s stitching and details are great, it’s a really good quality plushie.

According to its tag it’s part of a Pokemon Fit line. I never heard of it so I don’t really know what it contains- but I think it’s adorable how out of the 4 Pokemon it’s normally the biggest, and here it’s the smallest. It fits in the palm perfectly.

------

Our final Pokemon plushie is an adorable, fluffy Eevee. I really like Eeevee and its eeveelutions, and I really liked playing Let’s Go Eeevee! so this was a lovely surprise; now if only I had some items to make it match mine~

It’s well made and very cute and sweet looking, and according to the tag this came out last year- probably for Let’s Go Eeevee :P It’s a big bigger than Flaaffy, but still fits in the palm nicely. I can’t decide if I like its fluffy neck fur or huge tail more~

Kopiyo Friends Cushion

This is our last plush-based item in the box, an adorable cushion themed after an adorable birdie. From Kopiyo Friends there was a variety of various birds you could get in this set, but for Lucky Treat it was this specific... parakeet? It looks like the ones I used to have when I was little, so I’ve been calling it that.

It’s a good size for a pillow (head, lap, legs, etc) and it’s stuffed enough to feel marshmallowy squishy, and it stretches a little bit. It was very comfortable, and it makes for a nice secondary pillow you can cuddle with.

Solgaleo Figure & Mewtwo Mug

If you guys couldn’t tell this box was almost entirely Pokemon oriented :3 and to go with our plushies, we have a Solgaleo figurine from the latest handheld Pokemon games (until sword and shield comes out anyway). It’s from the Moncolle-EX collection of Pokemon figures... and that’s pretty much all I can say other than it’s paint quality is great. I’m not sure about the figure quality itself because I won’t be removing it from the packaging. I might give it to my friend, who bought this version of the game.

-----

Now this next item goes with the Mew I got, and I think they were both made to celebrate the upgraded/updated Mewtwo Strikes Back movie. I know my picture quality of this sucks, but I was kind of on a time crunch at this point... and by that I mean, I had cats going crazy in the background trying to get in my way and play with the boxes <_<

The mug has a very detailed, mood-setting picture for the movie. I have to admit it’s not really my style (CUTIEcrates probably says it all right?), but I do like it as a Pokemon fan and I’ll find a use for it.

Gengar Mask & Pokemon Memo

Now this is an item perfect for this time of the year, as well as when I clean or when the allergies hit (where was it during summer when I needed it?!). I did have one mask from a really old DokiDoki, but I have no clue where that went.

I love Gengar (at this rate it’s easier just to say every Pokemon in this box are ones I like, nearly), so this is a cute, funny little item. It’s a nice, padded mask with two layers of filtered-like fabric over the part covering your nose and/or mouth. I’m not really sure if they serve a purpose (maybe filtering dust or scent or something?) but they have a nice clean smell.

----

We can’t forget the stationery items now :3 and to go with all of our Pokemon goodness we have a notepad with 4 sets of 8 different designed papers! They easily tear apart and come from the Pokemon World Market series, featuring the various Pokemon from various regions hanging out and having fun.

Pokemon World Market Re-Ment & Colorful Ramune Blind Bag

I’m assuming the Pokemon World Market is a current series/collection :3 because next we have an adorable re-ment set. I miss getting re-ments in the boxes, so this was very exciting. Like the notepad, these were based on various regions foods, Pokemon, and activities. Such as the one I got, the Kanto region, having a bike, a Poke Flute, and a Pokemon Doll. Each one also includes a map of the specific region.

If you were curious, here are what the others had:

2. Squirtle Watering can, toy, milk, manju/dorayaki?

3. Torchic, Rice cracker, Pokeblock storage, and what looks like an envelope and ticket.

4. Piplup, helmet, shovel, what looks like chocolate, and Poffins.

5. A Pokedoll, a ferris wheel toy, and ice cream.

6. Pokedoll, food, skates, and the girl trainers hat.

7. A book or magazine with Snorlax, a toucan measuring piece(?), a bowl or fruit in a box, and an Alola Exeggutor pen with base.

Now compared to the others, mine feels pretty simple. But the detail on each piece is amazing; I could look at re-ments all day~ I really wish I could display mine, but I just don’t have a safe place or any room for them at the time. As much as I think a re-ment subscription box would be fun, I’m kinda glad they don’t have one of those :P I’d be in trouble.

-------

Now, this is a Tokyo Treat special box, of course there has to be a couple food items~ and first up is a Pokemon, Wobbuffet bling bag candy tin, which features 6 different designs that feature Wobbuffet interacting with various Pokemon. They’re all so cute!

But lookie lookie, did you notice which one I got~? The special mystery one :D I’m not sure if that was intentional or not, but I thought it was a fun additional surprise.

There are 3 flavors of candy, including a blue ramune/soda, yellow... I think lemon (but it could be banana? It doesn’t taste like it though), and a pinkish-red one that I couldn’t identify. It might be cola, because it tastes like a nasty cola Japanese candy DIY I tried a couple years back- one of the only cola flavors I didn’t like. But the candies are pretty good, even that weird might be cola one.

Pokemon Nori Chips & Dragonball Super Candies

Given the few Non-Pokemon items in the box, I was surprised to see this Dragonball themed candy. These come in a tin-like piece similar to old-style Japanese fruity hard candy. I’ve seen them several times but never had them before- and let me tell you, it’s a picnic trying to open these! You’ll definitely want a pen or scissors or a cornered object or something, nails are not recommended though. But maybe mine are just wimpy. The good news is that you don’t have to worry about them spilling.

Anyway, these are just cute orange spherical candies with a simple orange-ish flavoring to them. It’s not overly sweet or tangy, so it’s good if you like a mild candy.

-----

To kick up the snacks, we also have some curry-flavored Nori Chips/Seaweed. They come in this adorable Pokemon tin featuring Pikachu and some other impressive pokemon, and the inside is lined by pleated paper. The tin is 71.0 calories.

The seaweed/nori is thin, but in 2 layers, with curry flavored powder/substance between them. If you don’t like the taste of curry or seaweed you probably won’t like these, but if you do then you will. I actually really like eating seaweed as a snack, and curry is pretty yummy so I really like them x3 they’re not spicy, but it seems to pick up heat the more you eat of them. They’re also very crunchy.

Pokemon Tote

We also have some fun apparel, including a Pokemon Tote by the brand Outdoor Products, which has been in business since 1973 apparently. It includes a rainbow variety of colorful Pokemon from a few different generations making a variety of poses. I think there’s 2 per Pokemon. The bag also features a velcro strap to hold it shut, and it’s a medium-big size, so it would come in handy for a lot of stuff.

Pokemon Mini Bath Towel

To go with the Pokemon World Market collection, we also have this adorable and colorful mini-bath towel featuring all the different regions Pokemon having a fun time playing and checking things out at their respective hangouts x3

Despite the name, this thing couldn’t be fit into a single picture without losing a lot of detail, so I had to settle for this. It’s very soft fabric, I’m very eager to begin using it because it’ll go great with that set of Pokemon wash clothes I got a few months back.

------

Okay guys, that will be it for now! What did you think, was this Lucky Treat good? I really wish the other subscribers could have won this too because it was very fun and exciting- I still can’t believe i won it!

However, I did notice an item is missing. There was also supposed to be a pair of Pokemon Socks that I didn’t find in either box. I checked multiple times, and I couldn’t find anything to say the item was removed from the box, so I don’t know what happened. I messaged them about it, but because this was entirely free, I don’t actually mind the mistake. It happens... of course, if it had been my Vulpix then heads would roll.

Just kidding :P Anyway, I’ll keep you guys updated on that. Until later, remember to hug a Pokemon!

#tokyotreat #luckytreat #pokemon plush #pokemon merchandise

2 notes · View notes

dalekofchaos · 6 years

Text

My problems with The Last Jedi

I did not like The Last Jedi, I strongly feel like it's the worst Star Wars movie ever made. It’s The Room Of Star Wars and worse than The Holiday Special, but let me tell you why I don’t like it and why I feel it killed the Sequel Trilogy for me

My other Sequel Trilogy Critical posts

My TFA critical post

The Incompetence Of The First Order

Why Kylo Ren being redeemed is a bad idea

My problem with Rey

The wasted potential of Captain Phasma

The lowsped chase. Now onto the chase, or as I like to call it “the dumbest bit of military nonsense since the Emu war.” You have the First Order Fleet chasing the Resistance flotilla, supposedly the Resistance fleet is “faster” but they aren’t opening the gap between them and the First Order because… it would burn more fuel (because inertia isn’t a thing in Star Wars Space)? So they stay just at the extreme range of the First Order’s guns, and the Raddus has to be on the receiving end of a potshot every once in a while. Meanwhile said Resistance ships are flying in a straight line, direct away from the First Order fleet, so why not just set course past them and Hyperspace in front of them and catch them in the middle? Are interdictors at play here? Are they content to just think the fleet will run out of fuel and they can just catch them? It bothers me to understand that the heroes are only alive because of the gross incompetence of the First Order, because it doesn’t speak well to the capabilities of the heroes. Let me ask you what would be more exciting? The Resistance and The New Republic uniting their forces and having a big battle while Leia is using battle meditation so she can lead The Resistance to victory? Or a boring lowsped chase that involves being low on fuel, something never being talked about in Star Wars at all and have a edgelord ending where The Resistance is in ruins and only has 12 members left just so The Resistance can fit on the Falcon? It was so STUPID. Hyperspace fuel is never talked about for a reason, it cheapens the greatness of hyperspace travel and is not needed. We watch Star Wars for oh I don’t know a war in space. We didn’t need a boring lowsped chase, we needed an actual fight between The Resistance/New Republic and The First Order. With Leia’s battle meditation up against Snoke’s battle meditation. Leia’s will against Snoke’s might.

The First Order reigns. I am just baffled at the crawl. “The First Order reigns” HOW??? They lost Starkiller Base and a huge majority of their forces. How are they in control of the galaxy? SINGLE DAY HAS PASSED, HOW DO THEY HAVE ENOUGH FORCES TO TAKE CONTROL OF THE GALAXY??? The New Republic just gives up? That’s like saying the terrorists took control over the world after 9/11. The First Order are a fringe terrorist group, they are not the Empire. They should not be in control. Unknown Regions resources or not, they should not be powerful enough to reign supreme over the galaxy. What should have happened is The New Republic’s forces should’ve joined forces with The Resistance and take the fight to The weakened First Order. It’s also complete bullshit The First Order would take over considering The First Order’s terrible tactics. It’s just...baffling.

The First Order’s Incompetence during the Evacuation of D’Qar. Hux is goaded into allowing a Starfighter into point blank range with one of their fleet’s more valuable assets, he doesn’t launch a fighter screen to keep that fighter at bay, and when a real danger is detected, still does nothing. Captain Canady is left to launch his own fighters from Fulminatrix, and gets no support from Hux or the rest of the First Order fleet. Hux doesn’t launch support fighters, direct their batteries to put up defensive fire covering the dreadnought, nothing, no he’s too busy massaging his bruised ego because some flyboy put him on tilt with what amounts to a practical joke, and an 8km long warship pays the price for their incompetence. Now onto said Dreadnought. They have this weapon that is capable of dealing planetary bombardment and chooses to fire on a nearly abandoned planet instead of targeting the Resistance ship that is used to carry The Resistance fleet. Destroy The Raddus and you can easily pick a part The Resistance easily. Instead of doing the most intelligent thing, they chose to do the stupid thing.

The horrible bombing run. The bombers chosen for the Evacuation of D’Qar are a goddamn liability. MG-100 StarFortress SF-17 or The Resistance Heavy Bombers is just bad. It makes no sense. The Resistance has updated X-Wings, so why wouldn’t they have Y-Wings, B-Wings, and A-Wings? They are more effective and less of a liability. Y-Wings would have been way more effective than those new ships, which basically all just flew around until they were shot down one after the other and accomplished nothing. Like, only one of them even achieved what they set out to do... Pitiful. Y-Wings are fighter/bombers, they would have destroyed the Dreadnought with no casualties whatsoever. Y-Wings upgraded with new proton bombs would’ve got the job done, but that would’ve been overkill. They are the ships that beat the Malevolence and cut through the Ryloth blockade like butter, after all. They pack a punch with proper support, and they can at least outrun the explosives they drop. Before anyone tells me the Y-Wings, B-Wings and A-Wings are outdated technology hasn’t radically advanced in Star Wars for thousands of years. The Y-Wing is relatively young compared to most other ship designs. The A-Wing is conceptually older, being a derivative of the old Aethersprite Jedi Starfighter that was in use before the Clone Wars, just like how the X-Wing is a derivative of the ARC-170 and Z-95 Headhunter, and the B-Wing was probably inspired by the V-19 Torrent, and everyone knows the Star Destroyers haven’t changed at all for probably thousands of years. There’s no reason why it couldn’t have just been refined and improved upon like every other starship in the universe has been. If we go with the assumption that they were outdated and ineffective, then there were far better replacements than some slow bombers made of paper. For example, B-Wings, which were supposed to be their replacement in Return of the Jedi and were brand new at the time, and K-Wings, which were a replacement for both of them in Legends, both would’ve been very viable options. They also wouldn’t have broken the “small, fast, and maneuverable” tenet of the Rebel/Resistance design philosophy. Anyway, the Resistance still didn’t need any specialized bomber. All the Resistance needed to do was replicate what they did to Starkiller Base in the last movie. The dreadnought’s “point-defense” turrets aren’t fast enough to target one X-Wing (lol, what a stupid movie), so there’s no reason why a squadron of X-Wings can’t just bombard the weak spot with enough proton torpedoes until the dreadnought gives up. It’d probably just take one or two, as well. Instead, we got a glass cannon sent to destroy another glass cannon, with no trace of escorting ships or other noticeable strategy beyond “FIRE EVERYTHING!!!”

The Treatment of Luke Skywalker. I will never forgive the treatment of Mark Hamill by Lucasfilm. Luke ALWAYS saw the light within Anakin. Darth Vader was evil and committed atrocities for decades but he saved and redeemed his father. But he gave up on Ben because he saw Snoke’s influence on Ben and read his dark thoughts and instead of helping him like Luke would actually do and what Leia wanted Luke to do, he goes with the intention of killing him but stops with the shame. But the problem is that Ben saw him with his lightsaber, what he saw was Snoke’s whispers proven right that Luke was afraid of his power and wanted him dead. My problem is the movie made it seem like his family abandoned him and it's their fault for his fall and actions. Kylo Ren is completely responsible for his own actions. Ben Solo was a grown ass man when he fell to the dark side.Luke would never give up on his family. Luke Skywalker would never try to kill Ben, his nephew and his family. Darth Vader committed countless atrocities and Luke still saved his father and brought him back to the light. I will never believe that Luke would try to even ignite his lightsaber on Ben. Leia gave him her son to train, allow him to control his raw force abilities, love Ben like he were Luke’s own child and to protect him from Snoke. Even if Luke sensed the darkness in Ben, he would have talked to him and try to meditate and do anything that would help Ben. But no, instead of doing what Luke would actually do he ignites the lightsaber and it’s too late and Ben sees what Luke tried to do. Luke is ashamed and sorry, but it’s too late. What’s even worse is that Luke continue’s the old ways of the Jedi, instead of reforming the Jedi Order. In Legends, Luke reformed and made the Jedi better. But instead he continued the old ways and just gave up. He is written to be broken and hollowed out by his past mistakes and painfully out of character. TFA kept on insisting he left a map behind. Lor San Tekka has it and said Luke’s return would make everything right. Han and Leia said Luke left behind the map. In TFA script “It is Luke Skywalker. Older now, white hair, bearded. He looks at Rey. A kindness in his eyes, but there’s something tortured too. He doesn’t need to ask who she is, or what she is doing here. His look says it all. Hold on Luke Skywalker’s incredible face, amazed and conflicted what he sees, as our music builds, the promise of an adventure, just the beginning” Luke looked touched at seeing Rey in TFA and Rey was on the verge of tears, finally someone to help her with the belonging she seeks. In The Last Jedi, no tears and Luke just tosses away his father’s lightsaber like it’s nothing. We are not allowed to see Luke react to Han’s death or Luke to grieve that his best friend is dead. Han was a big influence and friend it was dismissed as if he barely knew him. To quote Mark Hamill on the matter “They had time for me to milk that big alien but to show any human emotion? Nah" He does not even care that his sister’s life and the Resistance she is leading is in danger. He does not train Rey. Again, he gave up on Ben instead of trying to save him. He is sorry and regrets it, but it is too late. You might say that Yoda and Obi-Wan also gave up. But for those two, the Sith took over the galaxy, they had to go into hiding to protect and guide Luke and Leia. Obi-Wan wanted to save Leia and guide Luke. Yoda always wanted to train Leia as a Jedi and bring Anakin back to the light. He was reluctant to train Luke but he still did his duty as a Jedi Master. They did not just give up and wanted to die and they did not betray their characters at all. Luke spends most of Last Jedi on a windswept island, brooding in solemn silence and frozen by indecision. He doesn’t connect with Rey on any meaningful level, doesn’t impart wisdom or knowledge, and never reasserts himself as the powerful Jedi he once was. A brief physical duel against Rey ends with her as the undisputed victor, completely killing his deserved mythos and her potential character arc in one fell swoop. It’s clear in that moment that he has nothing to teach her, and nothing to contribute to the overall narrative. The boundless potential that seemed poised to explode at the end of The Force Awakens fizzles here but never ignites. And without any training at all, Rey defeats Luke Skywalker and Luke acts all cowardly and begs her to leave. When he goes to Crait. He does buy time for the Resistance to escape, but he is not allowed to display his power, he’s not allowed to wield his green lightsaber, he does not bring down all the AT-ATs, the transports, shuttles or bring down the star destroyers in orbit. He’s not even there thus making the goodbye with Leia and final confrontation with Kylo Ren ultimately pointless. He toys with Kylo, but we don’t see a lightsaber fight between them. Luke Skywalker is not allowed to be Luke Skywalker. The Hero’s Journey that he was following was ignored completely and he just gave up and wanted to die. And he dies instead of reuniting with Leia properly. Mark Hamill wanted Luke to live until Episode IX where he would pass on what he learned to Rey. No big battle with Snoke, no passing on, instead Luke dies and all we’re getting is force ghost Luke. Luke Skywalker was a hero to an entire generation. Luke was the true heart of Star Wars. His was the journey we followed from idealistic farm boy dreaming of adventure, to reluctant warrior, and finally to savior of the entire galaxy. The original trilogy built him up, and The Last Jedi finally broke him down. I for one mourn my hero’s passing.

Leia’s knocked out for half the movie. Leia is taken out 90% of the movie and it doesn’t feel like Carrie’s swan song and TLJ does absolutely nothing with Leia. Carrie Fisher is gone. The character herself does nothing to affect the plot. We all knew that Leia was strong and powerful with the force, but the way they decided to have it be shown is baffling. Instead of showing Leia using the force to send the missiles flying at Kylo’s wing men or use Battle Meditation to inspire the Resistance to fight, instead we see the most impressive, and stupid looking, display of force powers, nothing follows from that. Leia goes into a coma for most the movie and then just hangs around. Isn’t it weird that Leia, one of the most important characters in the entire franchise only sees her brother for a moment, never mentions her husband, shares no screen time with her own son and isn’t even the focus in the very rebellion she’s been fighting for her entire life. In the end, all of her loved ones are dead, her son is wants to destroy her legacy, her allies abandoned her, her soldiers were almost all killed, and due to Carrie Fisher’s passing, TLJ is her swan song and curtain call. The most iconic and empowering woman in all of cinema gets to go out as a supporting character and Mary Poppins meme.

The treatment of Chewbacca. This movie failed Chewbacca. Chewie is not allowed to mourn the death of his decades-long companion to whom he owed a life debt nor is he allowed a moment of forgiveness and reconciliation with Luke. Nor is he given a scene mourning the deaths of Han and Luke with Leia. What does Chewie get? Barely any screen time, Rey has to translate Chewie to Luke WHEN LUKE KNOWS HOW TO COMMUNICATE WITH CHEWIE and instead of just letting him eat in peace, he is made to feel guilty of his predator nature and is used as a bad “eating animals is bad” message. He doesn’t even try to talk Rey out of her dumbass plan and is used as a matchmaker tool for her and Finn. His biggest moment is a fucking comic relief scene with Porgs. In this new trilogy they don’t treat Chewie like a person. I was pretty appalled in TFA too, when Chewie and General Organa literally ignore each other, walk past each other without so much as a glance and then Rey gets a hug? Chewie was Han Solo’s companion and best friend for at least a half-century, stuck with him when Han and Leia broke up, and he’s not even allowed to mourn onscreen? Chewie and Leia don’t even interact during the end of TLJ at all. Chewie is not allowed to mourn for any of his best friends at all nor is he allowed to try and talk Rey out of her obvious dangerous plan by going to the man WHO KILLED HIS BEST FRIEND, in what way would Chewie even be okay with that? This is a day later, a single day and the wounds are still fresh. And he is mainly used as comic relief and is not used as a character and hero of the rebellion nor is he allowed to grieve. Chewbacca deserved so much better.

The lack of respect for Admiral Ackbar. The fans hated it and the puppeteer Tim Rose and actor Jamie Stangroom hated it. “So in The Last Jedi, I was quite looking forward to maybe them giving him something more juicy,” Rose said. “We were only given the script on the day when we were shooting that piece of script, so each day I would come to work going, ‘Is today the day when Ackbar gets something a bit more involving?’ And I looked at my script and I went, ‘Oh, Ackbar’s going out of the window. Well, that’s that then!’ I wasn’t quite dead yet.” “We finished all of our bits and they asked me to come down to camera. And I thought, ‘Oh well, maybe they’re going to say thank you for being one of the heritage characters and giving 30 years and all that.’ But what they did was, they gave me a Millennium Falcon sign that had the day and the date on it, the scene number, and they said, ‘Can you look at camera and say ‘It’s a wrap?’ Because that would be really funny.’ “I was actually in tears in the suit because I thought – after everything, after hoping there’d be something, after knowing there wasn’t going to be anything else, Ackbar’s final moment before he went in to the box was a big joke about ‘It’s a wrap.’ They just thought ‘Wouldn’t it be funny?’ And that was the sum total of my life as Ackbar.” Once again, absolutely no respect for the legacy characters, Rian Johnson doesn’t give a damn about the characters from the Original Trilogy. Ackbar was crucial to the Rebel Alliance, he is an iconic character and is given an off screen death and the actor is made to give a tasteless joke. Fucking garbage.

No emotional scene of Leia and Chewbacca. Leia lost her love and her brother. Chewie lost his two best friends. We don’t get to see the two of them grieve and comfort each other. It’s in the novel, but not in the movie. This is one of the moments where showing is better than telling.

The Death of Paige Tico. if you are a casual fan and have no knowledge of who these new characters are in TLJ, then you would have no idea who Paige is and why Rose is crying until you see their twin pendants. And the way they went about her death was just bad. The bombers they chose to have were so slow and clunky that it’s laughable. Why don’t they have Y-Wings? The Resistance has weapons and ships from The Rebel Alliance and you’re telling me there are no Y-Wings? More onto Paige. Killing Paige without establishing who she is or why she is important to Rose is just god awful. You establish characters and connections they might have before killing them or it’ll lose all the impact. What could have been done after destroying the Star Destroyer. Paige escapes and rejoins the fleet. We get a touching scene of Rose and Paige reuniting. We also get to see Paige mourn for the losses of her squad members. We see a love/hate relationship with Poe, but eventually Paige trusts Poe and sees him as a leader. While Finn and Rose go to Canto Bight, Paige and Poe work together on the Raddus. And if Paige has to die, then show her sacrifice herself to stop the canon. There you go, we have a tragic death that is just as emotional and you get to see why she is important and instead of being killed off so early we get to know her and her relationship with Rose and her death is not wasted potential. The worst part about Paige’s death is that Ngô Thanh Vân has no speaking lines and we never get to see Rose and Paige’s sisterly dynamic and a WOC with no speaking lines was fridged.

Rey has no character arc. Rey doesn’t learn anything and I don’t feel like she has a character arc or journey. She starts her journey in TFA and I was excited to learn where her character would go. And TLJ does nothing with Rey. I do love Rey, but I don’t feel like it truly tests Rey and forces her to grow as a character. Rey is intriguing and we care for her, but her journey feels non existent. Luke and Anakin had struggles and journeys. I just don’t feel it from Rey. I am really disappointed with how TLJ handles Rey. Rey doesn’t have any struggles. Rey is all powerful and she is the same character she is from TFA. Everything TFA was building her up was instantly ignored. How Maz got the Skywalker lightsaber? Never mentioned again. How Rey was drawn to the Skywalker lightsaber and what the force vision was meant to mean? Never addressed. Rey says that she’s classified information, “none of your business” Then her parents are revealed as junk traitors who sold her for drinking money and died in Jakku. If her parents were just junkers, how did they afford that space ship if they spent the money on booze? Also the best theory I thought was gonna happen is that Rey has ties to the Empire or at the very least because of the novels it is stated that Palpatine had secret labs on Jakku and the Empire was invested in Jakku, hell it’s last stand WAS on Jakku. Rey herself told BB-8 she was classified information. All that build up for nothing. The force can come from anyone, we all feel it but you build Rey up only to do nothing with her. I’m not upset that Rey is a nobody, I’m just upset that what TFA was building up for Rey was dropped entirely. My big issue with how TLJ handles Rey, is she does not learn anything. She was awakened by Kylo’s mind melding, but after that nothing. She doesn’t learn anything from Luke and she feels like the same character in The Force Awakens. We see Luke showing Rey to feel the force and the Jedi’s hubris. The third lesson was deleted, but we did not really get to see Luke train her as a Jedi. Rey doesn’t learn anything. In the end we see Rey has the sacred Jedi texts, but Yoda pointed out that those texts were holding back the Jedi and the Jedi Order needs to be reborn So really, Rey does not learn anything.

Finn is changed from one of the main protagonists to being a side character in his own trilogy. Finn’s character arc from The Force Awakens was dropped completely in The Last Jedi. He does want Rey to be safe, but Finn just wants to run away, despite the fact that he learned to be courageous, face his fears and stay and fight at the end of TFA. The First Order kidnapped Finn as a child, from his family(possibly killed his family) he was able to leave The First Order and resist the indoctrination. He no longer wanted to fight, he wanted to leave everything, he wanted Rey to come with him. When Rey was captured, Finn had something to fight for and when Kylo Ren pushed her. Finn finally stood up to his past and The First Order. He overcame his fear. So Finn should have been wanting to fight The First Order and become a big deal in The Resistance, we could have even seen Finn inspiring a Stormtrooper rebellion against Phasma and The First Order. Finn just wanting to leave is just bad writing and backtracks his entire character arc from TFA. Finn is the first Stormtrooper to show a real personality, child soldier, who risked his life to find his own freedom and save the known galaxy and ended up in a coma for it. Finn was meant to be a main character, instead he is a supporting character to Rose. Forced to be embarrassed and pointless. He already learned about being brave and truthful. What happened about his past? His brothers and sisters? The family he’ll never know? Why does he share close to no scenes with Rey and Poe? Why does he get nothing to do? Finn was the FO’s best Stormtrooper, one of the best, to the point where he was considered Captain material and because of this Finn would recognize the Hyperspace tracker. Finn also has an almost perfect photographic memory due to being able to memorize the layout of both Starkiller base and the Supremacy with extreme accuracy. Kylo Ren had been impressed with Finn‘s capabilities during their lightsaber duel on Starkiller to the point Kylo had to tap deeper into the dark side to beat Finn. Finn is one of the most compelling protagonists of the franchise, right along with Ahsoka and Luke, because while he is the most dangerous to both sides of the war due to his skills and knowledge, he actively tries to save lives instead of end them. Finn’s upbringing left no room for love. He was stolen away from his family before he could even make memories of them. He tried to dedicate himself to the the First Order, but couldn’t. Finn chose to leave the only life he had known because he couldn’t let even one innocent life be senselessly killed. Finn deserves to be known as one of the Sequel Trilogy’s main heroes and not shoved to the sides. Let’s talk about Finn in TLJ. My problem for Finn in TLJ is that he is reduced to Rose’s sidekick and is made into a racist slapstick caricature. The first real problem for Finn. He is reduced to a slapstick joke in his very first scene. Finn awakens from his coma, slams his face and it is revealed that he isn’t even on the medical ship or even in the medbay on the Raddus...he is in the cargo hold and is made to be a joke. This is the Co-protagonist of the trilogy, and he’s reintroduced as a slapstick joke. Then once again he wants to runaway. I am getting a real racist vibe that Rian Johnson sees Finn as the cowardly black man troupe. That’s just downright disgusting. Moving on. Finn is paired with Rose Tico, honestly I want to like her, but bad writing prevents that. Finn is put with someone who abuses him and we are supposed to root for this and see it as romance? Let me explain. Finn is then tazed by Rose, which is understandable, she thought he was running away and she was in mourning. He also was objectively posing absolutely no threat to her, wasn’t running away, and was even trying to explain himself. Additionally, just the threat of the taser seemed to have been enough to stop him from leaving. But Rose attacked him anyways. The difference between Rey and Rose attacking Finn is Rey subdued Finn just enough to stop and interrogate him, Rose went completely overboard by paralyzing him and knocking him unconscious. It was completely unnecessary and gratuitous. Rey and Finn have a real friendship and partnership from the last movie. Rose, on the other hand, spends the rest of the movie belittling Finn and talking down to him. The book also says that she thought about using violence against him more than once after the tasing (for annoying her) and even pushed him. This displays a really problematic pattern of violence and disrespect towards Finn so yeah, multiple uses of violence and expressed desire to inflict violence on him as being abusive. I would argue that she is undeniably verbally abusive with Finn. In the movie and in the book (more so in the book) she often belittles him by calling him names and using other put downs. It seems she wants to make him feel bad about himself and bring him down, which is abusive. Of course, it doesn’t really matter what her intent is, even if she doesn’t “mean to be mean” it still counts as verbal abuse. So, in summary, her repeated threats and use of violence against Finn and her continual use of insults and put downs causes me to come to the conclusion that she is abusive to Finn. Then Finn is made to fail. The only time he is allowed to be portrayed has the protagonist is him facing his abuser and taking him down. My only problem is they cut out Phasma’s better death scene. Finn reveals Phasma shut down the shields for Starkiller Base, and that gets the Stormtroopers to turn on Phasma. This is what I would hope starts a Stormtrooper Rebellion. Finn’s defection was withheld information by Hux and Phasma in fear of a full on rebellion. Humanizing Stormtroopers and having one become a hero is kind of genius, but the way they did it in Episode 7 made it seem like Finn was the ONLY good Stormtrooper, which has to be an impossibility. If one Stormtrooper can suddenly switch sides, what's to say that others couldn't? And since Episode IX will most likely see the fall of the First Order, I personally think that Finn should convince all (or most of) the Stormtroopers to turn against Kylo and Hux, leading to a cool final scene where the First Order is ultimately destroyed by their own henchmen, children who were abducted and indoctrinated take back their narrative. That would be cooler and more unique, I think, than another Resistance vs. First Order space shootout, or Rey and her possible Jedi apprentice army taking them down. The most insulting part of the movie is the last part. Finn’s suicide run. Finn was the best Stormtrooper and knows about The First Order’s weapons, he should know full well that speeder would be destroyed trying to destroy the mini death star. Finn’s attempted sacrifice was pointless, Finn was treated like garbage throughout the movie, he deserved better.

The lack of empathy and care for Finn in TLJ. He is constantly belittled and mocked throughout the movie. In The Force Awakens, Finn fights Kylo Ren. He does well, but is ultimately defeated. He is slashed in the shoulder and the spine by Kylo Ren and falls into the snow, unconscious. Now if this were in the first 6 movies, Finn would be dead or would be paralyzed. But because it’s a Disney movie, Finn heals up. Rey continues the fight and slashes Ren across the face, leaving him with a gash. The characters all escape, but Finn has to be carried to a medical station, unconscious until TLJ. Kylo Ren seems fine, ultimately jumping in a TIE fighter to try and kill his mom before getting patched up further. Finn, again, has to wake up before doing anything. Here’s the difference between Finn and Kylo’s injuries. Finn awakens in a medical bed wearing a bacta suit. His first instinct is to call out for Rey. As he jolts up, he slams his head against the medical container. He slams against it again. Regaining awareness, he opens up the medical container to find himself alone in a cargo room. He falls out of the bed, spraying medical fluids all over the place. He trudges down the hallway until Poe and BB-8 find him. His injuries are never mentioned, shown, or even referenced again. Kylo, on the other hand, is asked by Snoke how his wound is, to which he responds “it’s nothing.” He then takes that ridiculous thing off, complete with a close-up of a sad kylo Ren face, with his sutures framed to draw attention to them. This happens again in the elevator. Then we get a scene of him getting patched up soberly by a medical droid. Then we get a shirtless scene as a final showcase of his other two scars. Throughout the film, Kylo’s scars are present and framed as a constant reminder that he went through pain. Finn’s injuries are used as a joke once and promptly forgotten, and let’s not pretend that these injuries are one-to-one aside from how they’re framed. Remember Finn received injuries trying to protect Rey, while Kylo received injuries trying to murder Rey. Finn received a deep wound across his spine, which can often be fatal in the real world. Kylo received a gash across his face. Finn’s injuries were worse and nobly gained. Kylo’s injuries were comparatively tame and well deserved. Yet the movie uses Finn’s pain as a joke, and Kylo’s pain as a humanizing factor. That Rey, as well as the director, cinematographer, and a considerable portion of the audience sees a scar and is willing to find sympathy with the person, no matter what they have done, is pretty reprehensible. Not only is Kylo Ren’s scar not enough to be considerably a change to his appearance, as Rian Johnson specifically modified the location of his scar because, “it looked goofy,” the scar is not the mark of an accident or from an assault, but rather from a failed assault on his part. Also, I could get into how messed up it is that scars that don’t fit Rian Johnson’s preferred model are considered goofy. Is a scar that isn’t kept to one side of the face not worth showing? Is a person with a scar you don’t personally like somehow less able to be taken seriously? By treating Kylo’s minor wounds as a big, life-changing deal, and treating Finn’s life-threatening wounds as a trivial matter of no more consequence than a joke, The Last Jedi reinforces century-old stereotypes about Black people. Specifically, it implies that Black people are somehow less affected by pain, have higher pain tolerances, or cannot be physically damaged the way White people can. This is a demonstrated, dangerous trend, where white people actually perceive Black people as experiencing less pain than White people under the same situations. Older textbooks, including some used as recently as late 2017, suggest Black people over-report the pain that they are experiencing. Doctors have declined to give painkillers to Black patients expressing the same level of discomfort that would grant a White patients the same painkillers, and some surgeons even believe that less anesthesia is needed for operations on Black people. This, of course, goes beyond the medical field, where Black people are not believed when they speak about suffering, and are expected to take more physical abuse than their White counterparts. However as the injuries are framed in a medical setting in this movie, I wanted to primarily address the medical bias as in the real world. This has been referred to as an empathy gap. When two people are hurt, with everything except the skin colour being the same, and White people feel worse for the hurt White person, there is a gap in empathy. Now, when the conditions are not the same, and the White person deserves to be hurt, and is hurt much less, and is still empathized with more, and the White man’s acts of attempted murder are framed as romance, while the Black man’s friendship is framed as harassment. Let’s also talk about Finn’s treatment. He’s placed alone in a room filled with cargo, without any monitoring. It’s almost like the medical staff doesn’t even deem his injury serious enough to receive attention. He’s not on the medical ship, which we know they have. He’s not even in the Raddus’s Medical Bay, which, again, we know they have. Finn is isolated, left unattended, injures himself, and stumbles out into the hallway without any assistance. All for a joke. Finn’s injury should have been treated with respect and acknowledgement. A scene with the doctors examining his injuries, telling Finn he is medically clear to join The Resistance and Finn sorrowed by his inability to help his friends, would have been light-years better than a scene where Kylo looks sad getting hurt while trying to kill people.

Poe was changed in between movies for no reason. Poe started out as the most levelheaded, compassionate and trusted soldier in the entire Resistance, so trusted that he was given the mission to find the map to Luke Skywalker and leading the strike force to destroy Starkiller Base, why is it that he is suddenly a hot headed fly boy who ignores orders and is getting no respect from his commanding officers? The character change for Poe Dameron was unnecessary and so out of place. Poe before TLJ would not be okay with sacrificing lives to stop one ship that can be easily replaced. In all source material and the last movie he refused to let anyone die. Not even Finn, a man who was an enemy an hour before they met formally, even though Poe shot his squad mate before during the fight on Jakku. Everything about Poe’s portrayal in TLJ is so unnecessary. Poe Dameron went from a caring and experienced rebel pilot to an arrogant, hotheaded latino stereotype in the span of like…a day. That’s not subversive writing, that’s racist and bad writing. I just don’t understand why no one even tells Poe the plan. Poe is a respected and highly trained, top ranking rebel fighter, who had been covert enough to execute a highly delicate and secret mission to retrieve the Map to Luke Skywalker, responsible for destroying Starkiller base and the biggest asset to the resistance and biggest threat to the first order, anything about the plan? He’s literally a war hero and is more than likely only second to Leia. And honestly? Holdo didn’t just leave Poe in the dark, she left the entire Resistance in the dark. When Holdo meets Poe, she then proceeds to dress Poe down just for asking for his orders and the plan. Keep in mind that Poe isn’t just some grunt. Even with his demotion, he’s your second or third in command, and he has the respect of the entire crew, as evidenced by his later leading a majority of the crew in mutiny against Holdo. Holdo brought her personal crew from her ship and worked with them while snubbing the main rebel crew entirely. That’s a bit of a dick move, protocol or not. One of the biggest issues was not that Holdo wasn’t telling Poe the plan, but it was acting as if there was really no other plan. She was literally taking personal jabs at him when he was trying to find something out. If she said something like. “While it seems bad , we are working on a plan right now. We are not just going to stay here and have everyone die. Just have your pilots ready to go at a moment’s notice” But she didn’t even give him that. Remember up until Poe taking over, they were watching ship after ship being picked off slowly. The crew was given nothing and was told just to trust her. Blind faith in leadership is a horrible message. If that is the take away then why not just do what the First Order or the Empire wants. I mean seemingly they are in charge of stuff now. And we should follow orders blindly. Moreover they were down to < 1000 people, and from the POV of everyone else she was just watching people die. Rank be jammed. Anyone who cared about their crew would do something. He was a Commander and the flight commander there is NO way he should have been left out in the cold. Then I like how they talk about his spunk over his knocked-out body. How Poe was treated in TLJ was absolutely atrocious and a complete insult to Oscar Isaac, Poe deserves better.

Poe was right and Holdo’s incompetence. Poe was absolutely right. He was right on taking down the Dreadnought. He was right in sending Finn and Rose to find the codebreaker. He was right with the mutiny, but the film for some reason tries to paint Poe as a dumbed down trigger happy flyjockey. big portion of the drama would have been saved if she just informed her now second in command her plan, hell she doesn’t even tell Connix who is the expert in evacuation. She disrespected pretty much everyone on the Raddus and surprised when Poe starts a mutiny? This is why I believe that Poe did nothing wrong in The Last Jedi. - While he lost a lot of lives, Poe was right in trying to bring down that Dreadnought. Poe’s reasoning for this run is that the Dreadnought is a “Fleet-killer”, and taking it out now could save hundreds, if not thousands of lives down the line. Yes, they lose all of their bombers and some of their fighters. Maybe 50-60 soldiers. However, the run is successful. The Dreadnought, which we see obliterate the surface of a planet with a single shot, is destroyed. - Poe was revealed to be completely justified with the attack at the beginning, that destroyer was the only First Order ship with orbital bombardment cannons that have longer range, punch through the toughest shields and shred the biggest ships. If he didn’t do that, it would’ve followed them through hyperspace and destroyed the Raddus pretty quickly. Leia probably realized this which is why she gave her blessing to Poe to “jump in a ship and blow stuff up” just before the attack by the Supremacy. - Poe didn’t disobey an order, he had convinced Leia of the plan. She was always in command, the call was always hers, and she decided to go through with it. However, when the consequences of the run are made apparent, she blames Poe instead of taking responsibility for her own call. - The Resistance drops out of hyperspace and is followed by the First Order. Poe’s concerns are entirely vindicated, and I think it’s hard to deny that the following engagement would have gone far, far worse for the rebels had the Dreadnought still been in play. Even assuming they survived that, what were they going to do once they got down to the salt planet? We saw this thing kill a planet earlier in the film. - The only reason the rebels ultimately survive is because of this bombing run. This is never acknowledged, however, and Vice Admiral Holdo takes command and proceeds to dress Poe down just for asking for his orders and the plan. Keep in mind that Poe isn’t just some grunt. Even with his demotion, he’s your second or third in command, and he has the respect of the entire crew, as evidenced by his later leading a majority of the crew in mutiny against Holdo. - Finn and Rose come up with a plan to stop the Hyperspace Tracking. He knows The Supremacy will continue to track the Raddus no matter what, at this point Poe doesn’t really see any other alternative besides just possibly letting everybody die at the hands of an incompetent commander. It’s the only plan he’s been given, so he goes for it. -Holdo brought her personal crew from her ship and worked with them while snubbing the main rebel crew entirely. That’s a bit of a dick move, protocol or not. Continuing on Holdo. In Bloodline, Holdo doesn’t stand up for Leia when Leia presents evidence that the First Order is a real threat. Why would Holdo have a ranking position in the Resistance when she didn’t think there was a need for it? -Connix assisted in Poe’s mutiny and she is the “ultimate authority” on carrying out a retreat. Why was she not told about the plan? Her position and placement on the bridge next to Holdo is pretty “need to know”. -One of the biggest issues was not that Holdo wasn’t telling Poe the plan, but it was acting as if there was really no other plan. She was literally taking personal jabs at him when he was trying to find something out. If she said something like. “While it seems bad , we are working on a plan right now. We are not just going to stay here and have everyone die. Just have your pilots ready to go at a moment’s notice” But she didn’t even give him that. Remember up until Poe taking over, they were watching ship after ship being picked off slowly. The crew was given nothing and was told just to trust her. Blind faith in leadership is a horrible message. If that is the take away then why not just do what the First Order or the Empire wants. I mean seemingly they are in charge of stuff now. And we should follow orders blindly. Moreover they were down to < 1000 people, and from the POV of everyone else she was just watching people die. Rank be jammed. Anyone who cared about their crew would do something. He was a Commander and the flight commander there is NO way he should have been left out in the cold. Then I like how they talk about his spunk over his knocked-out body. -When Poe finally mutinies with a large portion of the crew, Leia stuns him and it’s revealed that the plan was to empty their fuel reserves and send the escape pods to a nearby salt planet. However, when the plan goes into action, Finn and Rose’s contact betrays them and tells the First Order about the escape pods. This results in many of the escape pods being destroyed.This is played up to be Poe’s failure, but I disagree immensely. It’s Holdo’s failure.She had literally no reason not to tell anyone the plan. Poe, while his plan ultimately failed, had no reason to believe that Holdo wasn’t going to get them all killed. Nor did the crew. She’d given neither of them any indication that she was a competent commander, or that she had anything resembling a plan. In the face of that, Poe had the choice of either possibly letting everyone die, or trying something that, while it probably wouldn’t work, might just save the lives of everyone on that ship. In the context of the situation, I think Poe absolutely made the right choice, and any blame for what happened falls firmly on Holdo’s shoulders for being an incompetent leader who never inspired her crew or gave them any reason to believe in her, and yet expected them all to trust her with their lives and just believe that she was making the right decisions. -Holdo’s plan was stupid. Based on the First Order not having any WINDOWS. And based on being unwilling to admit she HAD no plan, and WAS in fact just trying to bail everyone out and see how many, if any, survived. She didn’t ram the Supremacy until almost every escape pod had been destroyed. HOLDO caused the deaths of far, far more Resistance personnel and soldiers than Poe ever did. HOLDO let her vanity and vainglory get in the way of effective leadership – if the people ON THE BRIDGE, FUELING YOUR TRANSPORTS, are helping to organize a mutiny against you because your plan is bad and going to get them killed, that’s a bad plan. Holdo’s entire action was based on wanting Leia to be proud of her, and not Poe, honestly. And granted: that’s a perspective we know that Poe can have, too, but what Poe wants more than anything else is to make sure the Resistance survives and the First Order is brought down without a chance of restarting the way the Empire did. Holdo mainly seems to want to be in charge and restart the New Republic that failed to stop the Empire’s roots to grow into the First Order in the first place, and she was unwilling to ACT against the First Order until what, twelve Rebels were left? She could have saved all of those unarmed, unshielded escape pods if she’d rammed the Supremacy as soon as the last pod detached from the cruiser. But she didn’t, because she never planned to take any actual actions to stop the First Order. Holdo’s idea of resistance was so passive, so laissez-faire, that she might as well have been a First Order mole for all the good she did. The difference between “the fire that will restore the Republic” and “the fire that will burn the First Order down” is immeasurable. Holdo – quintessentially in a White Feminist move – wanted to “rebel” only as far as it restored her own place of power in the Galaxy as a Senator in the broken New Republic that ignored the growing threat of fascism until the NR itself was destroyed. (This New Republic she wants to restore being the same one that allowed slavery to flourish “in secret” across the Galaxy, allowed for poverty like that on Jakku, allowed for the immoral disparity of wealth and power on Cantonica). In the novel Leia Princess Of Alderaan, Holdo’s “rebellion” doesn’t actually exist – she cares about people, specifically her own friends and the people for whom she is the Junior Senator, on Gatalenta. Holdo doesn’t really care about the good of the Galaxy. She cares about herself. Poe doesn’t care about restoring the New Republic. The New Republic is who looked him in the face and said that deaths caused by the First Order didn’t matter – or didn’t exist. They were corrupt and complacent, and they refused to acknowledge that the ideals of the Empire had not actually died down. Their treatment of poor, disenfranchised Systems – those whom the Empire had most exploited, in some cases – caused those same Imperial ideals to take root again and blossom as an open secret. They allowed for the Centrists’ (literal) xenophobia to be communicated like a legitimate viewpoint, keeping some Imperial POVs mainstream when they could have been condemned. The New Republic did not deserve to be destroyed with Starkiller Base, but it also didn’t do enough good to warrant being restored as it was. Poe cares about ending the First Order. Holdo doesn’t.If Holdo doesn’t care about preventing the tyranny of the First Order, then what exactly is she resisting…? Poe Dameron did absolutely nothing wrong in this movie, and he’s by far the most competent commander the rebels have at the moment.

The wasted potential of Rose Tico. Rose could’ve been so much more. I wanted to like her, Kelly Marie Tran did an amazing job, but bad writing held the character back. From the promos and info about Rose, I was excited. She wax this underdog Resistance mechanic who along with her bomber sister, was going to do her part in fighting the First Order, I thought she was a welcome addition to the Sequel Trio, the Lando for the Sequel Trio. What we got instead was just...bad. Instead of actually using her mechanic skills to help save The Resistance and keep The Raddus flying, we got a sideplot takes place away from the central story, on some random casino planet that’s message I could get from any grade school understanding of the world while calling the sole black man/use to be male lead a coward the whole film, forgetting he helped come up with the plan that destroyed the last movie’s super weapon then fought space Neo-Nazis. Then her trying to stop Finn’s sacrifice, and “that’s how we win, not by fighting what we hate, by saving what we love.” That makes no sense and ignores the entire narrative of Star Wars and heroism of the saga. Paige, her sister sacrificed herself to save The Resistance. Holdo sacrificed herself to save The Resistance. The Rogue One sacrificed themselves. Finn's entire arc in the movie was learning not to just think about running away with Rey and fight for a greater cause and when the time comes for Finn to prove that he's grown as a character, he can't? What was the point of Finn's arc in the movie? And let's talk about Poe. Shouldn't Poe be sacrificing himself? Poe has spent the entire film watching others die and give their lives and he's never backed down, so shouldn't Poe be in Finn's place? And if Rose stopped Finn who would save The Resistance? We saw after Rose stopped Finn, the bunker was blown up by the battering ram. Absolutely NO ONE knew that Luke was going to make his surprise entrance and save everyone. For all we knew, The First Order would've moved into the bunker and killed everyone and The Resistance. I actually personally love Kelly Marie Tran, I just think her character was wasted and really hope they truly use Rose to her full potential in Episode IX. I want Rose Tico to appreciate and value not only herself, but her skills as a mechanic. Maybe even develop some computer skills and be The Resistance’s hacker. It’s not unrealistic for the Resistance to have one. She could still think her skills aren’t useful considering most Wars have been won by soldiers and Jedi, not hackers but grow and learn that her skills as a mechanic and hacker are valued.

Kylo Ren is downgraded from his amazing character in the Force Awakens. Everything about Kylo Ren in TFA is amazing. Kylo Ren was a well-rounded antagonist that broke the clichés of most of modern villains. Kylo Ren was a complex and layered character who wasn’t glorified or idealized for his morally wrong actions, so powerful in both the force and with his lightsaber. A hint that the lost child was still in there, but still chose to kill his father to reject redemption and chose to be who he was by choice regardless of his positive upbringing. Kylo Ren is exactly the right villain to succeed Darth Vader in this new trilogy despite not being a Sith. Had Chewbacca not shot Kylo, I don’t think Rey or Finn would’ve made it out of Starkiller Base alive. My problems with Kylo in TLJ is he is downgraded to the great character he was in TFA in TLJ. In TFA there was already a moral ambiguity with his character, but it was subtle. It was made in your face that he was sympathetic in TLJ. An interesting antagonist/villain isn’t a mustache twirling generic character that does things for no reason. Villains are meant to be the antagonist. We are meant to disagree with their actions and understand the flaws in them, to have a villain/antagonist who not only acknowledges what they are doing is wrong, but feels guilt about it. This is something that is extremely difficult for a writer to convey believably. Most of the time a director/writer will go out of their way to make their antagonist/villain sympathetic at the cost of the overall story. They only want the audience to relate to the antagonist/villain so they only put emphasis on that character’s sympathetic traits and ignore their negative ones. Ben has to earn his redemption, he doesn’t need it to given on a silver platter. His whole personality changed. While Han’s death would be enough, it just doesn’t work. In TFA his goal was finding and killing Luke Skywalker. In this movie I just don’t even know what his end game or motivation is. He went from this powerful dark side warrior and in TLJ he was downgraded and made weaker. And of course he is made into a meme cause of the shirtless scene. His bond with Rey was really the only good thing about his character arc in TLJ. The problem is everyone just assumes that this leads to redemption and Kylo turning back into Ben Solo, it was manipulation. And my issue is with how Kylo doesn’t explain why he killed Han. He doesn’t explain to Rey that he killed Han because he felt like he was being torn apart by the light and dark sides of the force and he thought killing Han would help him, but all it did was make it worse. It’s not explained that Snoke has been preying on Kylo ever since he was a child(though Kylo is responsible for his actions. There is no scene with Kylo and his mother. They never once interact. The sad thing is they will never get to interact because of Carrie’s passing. At the end of TFA Snoke said he was going to finish Kylo Ren’s training but no training is given to him. It doesn’t add up that Snoke does not train Kylo. Snoke said that he would complete Kylo’s training when he told Hux to bring Kylo Ren to him at the end of TFA. Yes, he did fail him and he sensed his father in him, but I really thought we’d see Snoke sending Kylo to Vader’s castle on Mustafar to allow the dark side energies in the castle and what remains of Vader to strengthen the dark side within him to snuff out the light. Killing Han broke his spirit, but he could use the castle to complete Kylo Ren’s training. Then we would see Snoke personally train Kylo himself. Snoke begins by telling Kylo the Sith code ” Peace is a lie, there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The Force shall free me.” teaching him the ways of the dark side, using torture and force lightning to draw Kylo’s rage to bring out his full potential in the dark side of the force. We needed to see Sith training. We never once got to see it, so we needed to see it with Snoke and Kylo Ren. The throne room fight is just bad. Not even once do we see them displaying their powers is what cheapens the fight. Kylo Ren is powerful enough to freeze a blaster and a person in place and Rey herself unlocked Kylo’s powers, so the two of them could have easily ended the fight sooner than it was dragged out. Kylo is powerful in the force but he SERIOUSLY could not stop a Praetorian Guard choke holding him and Rey struggled with a guard? Rey and Kylo were stronger in TFA and are just made weaker in the duel with the Praetorian Guards. Kylo could have frozen half of the guards and Rey could have mind tricked the other half into killing the frozen guards and Kylo and Rey could have finished them. They are masters of light and darkness, but they are made weaker. As for their final scene together. Kylo’s proposal works because he’s a manipulative asshole. Kylo Ren doesn’t even have a clear motivation. He wants to kill Luke because he thought he wanted to kill him. There’s no reason why he killed the other Jedi, there’s no reason why he joined The First Order, What did he hope to accomplish by joining the First Order? It’s never even explained why he has Vader’s mask. He never explains why he killed Han or why he even wants to destroy The Resistance. He says “let the past die” yet continues to lead the First Order in the same direction that Snoke did. Snoke wanted the Resistance dead, so why take up his mission? He spent the duration of the movie as the most calm and collected and even most Jedi like character throughout the movie, but by the end he turns into a screaming lunatic again by the end. There is no motivation for why Kylo Ren is doing anything. He acts how the plot needs him to act and that’s it. Vader wanted to crush the Rebellion and turn Luke to the dark side. With Kylo Ren I just don’t understand, turn Rey and start a new order? He knows full well Rey doesn’t want anything to do with that, if that’s his plan, it’s a bad one. And if he doesn’t have one it hurts him as a villain. it’s not like he’s Michael Myers or The Joker where it works for them. But with Kylo Ren it just hurts him and the story and hurts the potential of The First Order. There is no motivation or a clear endgame for Kylo Ren or anyone in The First Order, if Kylo is to be redeemed, that hurts his entire narrative, that just makes his path as a villain bad since he has no motivation or endgame. and that just hurts Kylo Ren as a character.

Supreme Leader Snoke is wasted and there is no reason to care now that the villain you’ve been building your trilogy around is dead. Snoke’s death was too soon. Snoke is a dark side user. Calm and collected. Old enough to see the rise and fall of the empire. He takes no risks and does what it takes to win. He was different from Palpatine and I dare say he even had potential to rival Kreia. He was a mastermind and did not allow himself to be a slave to the dark side. He did not want his apprentice to die like the Sith masters of old. He did not want to keep power until his dying breath. Snoke was not the average Sith Lord, he was different. He was respectful, he was very powerful, and watching his scenes, even when faced with failure, he remained calm and collected because he was playing the long game and was not a slave to the Darkside like the Sith. He was invested in turning Kylo Ren into Vader’s heir and even has a ring from the catacombs of Vader’s castle. Snoke was so interesting, so many unanswered questions and this well thought out villain. And then TLJ turned him into a dumbed down Palpatine rip off. The claim that Snoke and his backstory is not important is dumb, considering that we know nothing on why this war is even happening or even why The First Order is doing ANYTHING! We want to know who Snoke is because we want to know how this random evil guy was able to destroy the lives of the entire original trio, corrupted Ben Solo and override the happy ending the entire original trilogy and prequels were fighting for. The struggles of the prequels, the clone wars, rebels, original trilogy, all of these stories and struggles were undone because of Snoke, so of course we have questions. Why do the remnants of the Empire follow Snoke and where did he come from? Not wanting to know the motivation of the villains is just plain ignorant. They completely wasted Snoke. Snoke is a power from the unknown regions. He was SO powerful that Palpatine sensed him, Palpatine was so focused and invested in Jakku in hopes of getting closer to the Unknown regions and he wanted to meet what he believed was the source of the dark side of the force. And they just kill him off so easy? Now there is no reason to care. Kylo Ren is not an intimidating villain and it’s pretty obvious he’s turning to the light in Episode IX. Hux is a bumbling incompetent fool and I’m pretty sure they already confirmed he will be more comedic in Episode IX instead of being a threat. There is a villain problem for the Sequel Trilogy. There is no menace in The First Order anymore and I really feel there is no reason to care. The only possible way The First Order will be an actual threat to the Galaxy is if Rae Sloane usurps Kylo Ren. Problem is, that would actually make the First Order a legitimate threat, and Disney could never allow that.

Tallie Lintra’s death. I did not know much about the new character, hell I didn’t even know her name until I played Battlefront II. But I loved this pilot. I loved how good she was and I wanted more of her and god killing her off was pointless. What’s the point of introducing these unique Resistance fighters if only to kill them off?

No Lando Calrissian in The Last Jedi. I read Rian Johnson’s reason for no Lando Calrissian that he would’ve taken DJ’s place. But Johnson wanted the plan to fail….for reasons. Like god forbid they make it all worth it by having the plan succeed and they get captured when they get to the escape pods. Here’s how I would have put Lando in The Last Jedi. Lando is the person Finn and Rose are meant to get help from. They leave with DJ, but Lando was expecting to meet two members from the Resistance, so he leaves Canto Bight and on his way out he gets Leia’s message and mobilizes old friends from the Rebellion(a cameo from Wedge Antilles) and goes to give the Resistance some reinforcements. We then see a little reunion with Lando, Leia and Chewbacca and Lando revealing that he was who Finn and Rose were meant to meet. That’s how I would have included Lando in The Last Jedi.

Phasma was wasted in The Force Awakens and she was completely wasted in The Last Jedi. While I love that we got to see Phasma and Finn fight, again they did not do anything with Phasma. In her novel she is a completely different and better character. In the novel which is a fascinating study of how utterly ruthless and selfish she is, how completely dedicated to her own survival at the expense of others, and how there is no one and nothing she would not betray to further herself. It’s about peeling back the layers of a seemingly perfect First Order warrior to show her morally empty core, and with it the rottenness of the First Order itself. The novel shows with unsettling clarity that, under all the pretty words about the ideals of justice and order, the First Order is a place where actual idealistic soldiers are used and then thrown away (see: Finn, Cardinal) while backstabbers, abusers, and murderers like the two Huxes and Phasma are actively shielded and rise to the top. Phasma is a survivor. She will always align herself with the most powerful force. Phasma is extremely intelligent and a brilliant battlefield commander. Outside of the movies, she’s lost approximately one fight. Ever. the movies portray her as a minor annoyance but in the book she is the most badass human to ever live and I’m upset with how they’ve treated her. But really, what would’ve helped Phasma is her deleted death scene

youtube

General Hux, the man who caused the destruction of the Hosnian system and is shown to be a younger angrier version of Tarkin in TFA, is shown to be an incompetent bumbling fool and Captain Canady is the only intelligent officer in The First Order. He does not deploy the Tie Fighters, order the fleet to move in when The Resistance are evacuating D'Qar and vulnerable, instead orders the Dreadnought to move in, and instead of ordering the Dreadnought with it’s devastating canon to fire on the cruiser thus giving the transports nowhere to go, he orders an orbital bombardment to an almost empty planet. But does not fire because he sees Poe’s X-Wing When Poe arrives in his X-Wing, the only X-Wing in view. Hux does not order deploying the Tie Fighters or even ordering the Dreadnought to fire on Poe. They do absolutely NOTHING. How is Hux a general again? Did he just want to hear himself talk? The turrets are being destroyed by Poe and Hux tells Captain Canady to fire the Dreadnought, Canady responds it’s too small and too close of range to fire their turbolasers and orders the Tie Fighters to be scrambled which should have been done 5 minutes ago. Canady knows Poe is not aiming to penetrate their armor, he knows Poe is clearing out their surface cannons. Here we have it. The only intelligent officer in The First Order, everyone else including Hux are incompetent. How exactly is Hux a general again? Moving on. Hux is slapped around with the force by Snoke, okay understandable, it’s for failure. Vader did the same. But god it is done in almost every scene by Snoke and Kylo. When the Silencer pretty much destroyed all the X-Wing fighters, and The Resistance command is jettisoned in space, Hux just orders Kylo back. They have the opportunity to end The Resistance, just calls him back, a scene later Hux complains he let them go. Sure they can still track them, but the fact that they let them goes shows that Hux is a fool. The only time Hux is allowed to be villainous in the movie is when he is prepared to take out his blaster and kill Kylo Ren. Everything else he is either an idiot or someone’s toy to be slapped around. And you expect me and the general audience to believe Hux is going to be the villain in Episode IX?

The First Order’s incompetence at the Battle Of Crait. So now the Resistance is stuck on Crait, the First Order knows they are there, we know implicitly that the First Order has more than one dreadnought in their fleet, we also know the Resistance is fresh out of bombers. Maybe instead of calling for a costly ground invasion just call in another dreadnought and finish the job once and for all. This isn’t next level thinking, this isn’t superior tactics. This is using a rock to smash a bug levels of thinking. But they don’t, they land a ground invasion bigger than Hoth and bring a mini Death Star with them. Note again, that while Hoth was defended by more men with better equipment, Crait is defended by a quarter as many with rusting, dilapidated equipment… but it was enough to keep the Order stalled for Luke Skywalker to video-conference in.

The ending. The way they did end the last jedi, it leaves nothing to show that there is a reason to see Episode IX. There is no cliffhanger or showing anything of a Struggle. AOTC ended with the beginning of the Clone Wars. Empire ended with Luke learning the truth and Han was taken to Jabba. Last Jedi ends like the end of the trilogy. The Rebellion is saved and shows it can fight the First Order. It doesn’t feel like there is anything that can be done to make us feel like there is a reason to watch the next movie as it feels like everything was resolved. Doesn’t feel like there is anything to be fighting for or a reason to care.

#Anti TLJ #Anti Rian Johnson #Star Wars #Rey #Kylo Ren #Ben Solo #Finn #Poe Dameron #Rose Tico #Paige Tico #Finnpoe #Supreme Leader Snoke #General Armitage Hux #Star Wars Episode VIII The Last Jedi

13 notes · View notes