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countessofravenclaw · 2 years

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Memories of Time: Chapter thirty

What if you woke up one morning and realized that you were back in the beginning of your story? But to your surprise, you remember how that story will play out. Did you go back in time?

“GO!!!!!”

Gastón had never been as glad in his life that it was Matteo behind the wheel as he rounded the curve on a speed that definitely was not legal. Even when Matteo had gotten his license after Gastón had moved to England, he still had more than enough experience with Matteo’s driving. Matteo wasn’t a bad driver, just a carefree and fearless one to say. Gastón totally understood why Alexander had had a driver.

“What happened?” Luna asked them as they got out of the suburbs and into a bigger road.

“Short version or the long version?” Gastón looked at Nina and she was pleading for him to do the talking with her eyes. “Well, the basics are that Ana had locked Nina in the house. When I got inside the house with the key, she saw me, so we had to run.”

“So Ana full-on saw you, and the fact that you ran away from under her nose and got into this car?” Ambar asked.

“Pretty much. Good thing is that I don’t think she recognized me,” Gastón responded, “There is no way for her to know who I am, now that I think about it, it might make it worse, but there will be someone after us very soon. We need to go fast so we won't be followed.”

“Well, this was never going to go according to plan was it?” Simon very slightly chuckled.

“This isn’t a laughing matter, but I am sorry to find it funny,” Luna cracked up. “But the good thing is that we all got away. Even if Matteo had a climb over fences and Gastón practically kidnapped Nina. Things were going to fall apart anyway. Now we just need to speed to the airport.”

“Thank you for that much-needed optimism Luna. Now we just need to get to the airport and on the plane before they go after us. Then we can’t be tracked.” Matteo said while shifting the gear stick to the bigger speed.

“Hold up a second,” Gastón had finally gotten his thoughts back together. “Who let Matteo drive?”

“Did you want a fast getaway or not?” Matteo snarked at him from the driver’s seat, “You know how slowly Simon drives.”

“Hey!”

“No relevant.”

“No, you don’t have a license right now.”

“Well, technically not,” Matteo shrugged his shoulders, “but I still know how to drive.”

“No, Matteo you need to pull over,” Gastón responded.

“Why?”

“We are already being hunted down starting pretty soon. We don’t need to get arrested for having an unlicensed driver on top of it all.”

“Ooh, right…” the realization seemed to hit Matteo and he eventually stopped the car on the closest bus stop.

“Simon, do you take the wheel or do I?” Gastón asked Simon as car cama to hault.

“Please, do it,” Simon pleaded. “This is a manual and I can’t drive that in high-stakes situations. I just and just got it to the park.”

Gastón nodded and quickly switched the spots with Matteo. A manual gear shift was something you didn’t see that often in the year 2024 but the old Ferrari he had driven all of his teenage years and had been forced to drive again in this time-warping situation they were still in, was a manual. His parents had insisted he learned both manual and automatic gearshifts, and that skill was apparently something you couldn’t forget if you once learned it well.

“It is almost 40 kilometers to the El Palomar so this will take at least an hour.”

“So we are maybe on schedule,” Ambar sighed from the backseat. “Everyone has the tickets, right?”

***

Nina sighed, as she sat on the hotel room's bed, looking at her tablet. The plane had landed extremely early in the morning. During the commotion and the way she had been able to escape, she had to left her phone behind. Apparently, her mother had not noticed that small detail since she had noticed after pulling the text up on her tablet, that she had seen a couple of messages from her mother trying to reach her.

There was no way she was answering any of them, but it was a good thing to know what was going on back in Buenos Aires and was their actual location had been discovered which was extremely unlikely, but better safe than sorry.

“The others went to get food as places open up,” Gastón suddenly came from behind her and sat next to her on the bed. She closed her tabled and turned to him.

“I made you sleep on the plane, but you still look a bit pale,” he ran his finger on her chin. “Still shaken up about the way we took off? I am sorry about that, but it was the only way.”

“You don’t need to apologize,” she scooted closer to him and leaned her head on his shoulder. “It was sudden, but else could we have done? We’d be in bigger trouble if we had stayed. And I kind of wanna see Mom’s face after all that. To think that I thought that the most adventurous thing I’d ever do would be going to college overseas, not running away from my mother…to overseas.”

“Aha, so it is not agreeing to marry me?”

“You know what I mean. I just hope this works…” Nina trailed off for a second. It was more than fair to say that this was a long shot and how they had even gotten this far beyond her. “If it doesn’t we are in huge trouble. We need to go back to eventually.”

“Yeah, I try to not think about that, but we will need to. But, I have this feeling, that this will actually work.” Gastón pulled the book With the speed of light from his bag. “This didn’t come out of nowhere.”

“There is definitely something about this book,” Nina took it from him. They had tried to run some research on it, but outside that one Wikipedia article, there was absolutely nothing on it or the author. “I have not been able to find anywhere when it was published.” She opened to book to its inside cover. “It doesn’t even read here. Plus, who is Markus Tuominen? You said the name sounded nordic, and I looked into it, and it is not just nordic, but specifically finnish.”

During her master's at Oxford, Nina had done some research on Uralic languages and their translation into English. She had learned quite a lot about notable finnish authors.

“But this is also quite contemporary writing, and not close to anything classical like anything from Minna Cath or Aleksis Kivi. Blake wouldn’t have a book from a small modern author, from a faraway country.” Nina turned to book around her hands, “I am totally crazy for thinking this, but the whole plot of this just sounds like something I would write. What do you think?”

“Now that you say it, a young girl in peril for her family does sound the style of Si Pudieras Tener un Deseo,” Gastón responded with a pondering voice, “Just with added time travel and sci-fi elements.” he paused for a second, “This wasn’t you, right? From the future? I can’t put anything past happening anymore.”

“Even if it seems like my style, this is not me.” She laughed, “I am not nordic and my name is not Tuominen.”

“Names can always be changed.”

“Only thing I am planning to change my name is my last name to yours…” she dropped the book to the bed and turned to face him leaning closer.

Gastón took the hint, sliding his arm around her waist and swiftly pulling her closer…

They were interrupted as Gastón’s phone started ringing.

“It’s Mom again,” Gastón said annoyed. “I don’t get it. They never call me this much when they are away.”

“You are not going to answer?”

“I can’t risk it. You know I can’t lie,” Gastón silences his phone while letting it still ring, “I don’t want them to think there is something wrong. I’ll let it go the automatic answer machine, so it doesn’t look like I am hanging up on them.” He dropped his phone down on the bed and smoothly pulled her close to him again pressing his lips to hers.

“Oh goodness. I knew it was a mistake leaving you two alone,” they were interrupted again as the door was opened. “Wanna knock it off, we brought food.” Matteo rolled his eyes at them as they came in.

“What is the status?”

“Well, my parents definitely know I have vanished,” Luna said and showed everyone a text from her mother asking where she was.

“I hope that the letters do something to help,” Ambar sighed.

“Why are we pretending like they will stop them going after us,” Matteo lamented, “the only thing they do is reassure everyone that we were not kidnapped.”

“Maybe we should look up some news feeds, just in case,” Nina said and started typing on her table. Matteo started playing with the remote as she pulled up the Argentina news network live feed.

“We have new information on the teenagers reported missing from Buenos Aires… the police have confirmed that the size of the group missing is six instead of four and they seem all to be connected to each other. Among the missing are Argentina’s Italian Embassy’s head Alexander Balsano’s only son Matteo Balsano and Real estate agent and state’s financial advisor…”

Everyone stared at the screen as the news announcer read all of their names out loud.

“What?” Matteo spoke out first “How do they even know some of us are even gone? How is this in the country-wide news?”

“Probably because it is a big deal when millionaire's children go missing,” Gastón pondered, “Something we conveniently didn’t think about. That's why they only really mentioned Luna and Simon in the end. It is much more important when you, me, and Ambar go missing.”

“They offered a reward for us?” Ambar asked shocked looking at the screen “Whose idea was that? Almost like we were kidnapped and they are paying ransoms.”

“I think we are worth more than that, though,” Matteo joked.

“What do we do now?” Luna asked.

“Nothing,” Ambar answered, “Our reservation for the tower isn’t until this evening. “They know we are gone, and the Argentinian police are after us, but we are here, in France.”

“...The newest bit of information we have acquired is the group flew to…” the news announcer continued…

“Guys,” Matteo suddenly said and they all turned towards the TV he had accidentally turned on the moment before. On the Tv, there was a french newscast running and their faces were plastered on it. “Ambar, what are they saying?”

“Pretty much the same as the other did,” Ambar was only one of them who understood French at all. “but…it seems like they know… we are here.”

“Great… just fabulous.” Matteo flobbed down on the bed. “What do we do now? If the french police are after us, we can’t go outside.”

“Especially somewhere that is as public as Eiffel Tower. Our faces were plastered over the news. Even the tourists will recognize us.”

“Wait does this mean, that if we get caught, Simon will get charged for kidnapping us?” Luna suddenly thought out loud. Everyone turned to look at Ambar as she was the lawyer in the room.

“Well…” Ambar clearly was thinking hard, “Technically not, since we all left of our own free will, and no one was actually kidnapped. This shouldn’t be treated as a kidnapping, but a disappearance… but in another case… our parents will be mad and it might not look very good that we, five “minors” have fled the country with someone who is not. I also don’t know what kind of weight our testimonies will hold.”

Everyone stayed silent since no one could come up with anything to say… had they really been cornered?

***

“But, we can’t just sit here and wait for them to come to get us. We do not know how far our tails the police really are, so we need to get out of this as far as possible.” Ambar got up and opened her laptop again. They were not getting caught if she could help it. They had come way too far. “I canceled the elevator reservation. If we wanna go now, we need to climb the tower up by the stairs.”

“Can you do that?” Luna eyed Ambar’s ankle which she still had bandaged.

“It is either that of facing our parents' wrath or worse.” She scoffed. Yes, her ankle was not completely healed yet, but it was not like that was going to stop her. “I’ll manage. Do you wanna get out of this time or not?”

“Ambar, what are you thinking?” Gastón asked her.

“First of all, we need to sign ourselves out of this hotel,” She started rummaging through her bag for something, “Simon will need to do that, since he will need to talk to people at the front desk and he technically was even reported missing. The report focussed much more on us others so he is most unrecognizable.”

She pulled a stack of cash from her bag and handed it to Simon. “Do it with this so cards can’t be tracked.” Everyone just stared at Ambar as she shoved the money to Simon

“This is probably the first time I have seen cash in years.”

“Emergency stash. Did you all forget that our credit cards in this day and age can be tracked? Simon, don’t just stand there, we need to move.”

After maybe 15 minutes Simon came back to the hotel room while everyone else had gotten everything packed.

“Everything okay?”

“Yes. They did ask a little bit since we are leaving earlier than expected —and didn’t stay the night, but I just said that we had an urgent appointment.”

“Why are the French so nosy?” Luna asked as she zipped her back bag up

“Look who is talking? Everyone packed?”

No one responded negatively, so they grabbed their bags and get out of the room.

“Okay, to get to the tower, we need to travel on the underground through six stops,” Gastón said as they were making their way down the stairs of the small hotel, “And let's try to get past the front desk fast.”

Everyone nodded and they entered the lobby and started walking towards the door when…

“J'espère que tu as apprécié ta journée.” The front desk worker suddenly said to them. Everyone jumped, and turned to Ambar.

“Bien sûr que nous l'avons fait. Je vous remercie pour votre hospitalité.” She quicky respoded to the worked in frech. “Come on lets go.”

“What did he say?” Simon asked Ambar when they were outside of the hotel.

“Just the basic, I hope you had a good stay and stuff,” She responded, “nothing to worry about it. Where’s the underground station?”

Little did they know that after they had gone and gotten on the underground, the desk worker had realized that those oddly acting guests, who had come in during the morning and had already left, only a couple of hours later had been six Spanish-speaking teens. Exactly like who had been reported missing in the news.

“Okay, it is a small walk from here to the Champ de Mars,” Gastón was looking at his phone's GPS.

They proceeded to walk along the walkways and across the bridge over the Seine. Luna was holding Matteo’s hand as they tried to blend over into the tourist traffic.

“I think I have gotten enough of France for the rest of my lifetime,” Gastón said as they stopped at the park looking over the Eiffel Tower.

“You know me too, but we’ll end up back here eventually,” Nina took his arm. “There is always Flor and Oliver’s wedding.”

“Wait what? What wedding?” Matteo suddenly exclaimed. Luna tried to hide her laughter, even if Flor was older than him, Matteo liked being protective over her as his cousin. Matteo had always said that he did that because he never got a sister to be protective over.

“Nothing.”

“Nope, you two spill. What do you know?”

“Nothing, it was a joke,” Nina laughed at Matteo as they got into the line to climb up the tower.

The line was not long but still seemed to move at a snail’s pace and the more time it took, the more anxious they all got.

“Should we stay quiet?” Ambar asked with a hushed voice. “We attract attention while we speak Spanish with four different accents.”

“Ambar that's ridiculous.” Matteo scoffed as the guard scanned their tickets and they started climbing the flights of stairs.

Not far from them police radio broadcasted: “The missing teenagers from Argentina have been spotted at the foot of the Eiffel Tower.”

“You good?” Luna asked Ambar as they finished the last floor of stairs to the second platform of the tower.

“Managing,” Ambar responded with her face expressionless which only meant she was trying to lie.

They got in to the line for the elevator. Luna leaned over the railing looking at the sun in thought until she heard a wail of a sire in the distance.

“Are those police cars.” Matteo had noticed them as her and to their surprise, they saw a couple of white and blue cars with flashing lights making their way towards the Eiffel Tower.

“Seems like it… but that doesn’t mean us. There is thons of crime in Paris.” Gastón said as they got inside the elevator to get to the top floor.

“Actually, it absolutely is about us,” Ambar said with more high-pitched voice showing them a new french news article on her phone.

“I can’t believe we’re front page news…” Matteo remarked.

“And I can’t believe that we're literally sitting ducks right now.” she countered him. “They are the police, it will only take maybe 10 minuted to get up here and they’ll close the tower so we can’t hide.”

“We might as well wait for them come and get us.”

“What do we do? How do we know how this works?”

“Will this work?”

The elevator dinged as it ascended yo the peak of the Eiffel Tower. They had no other choice but get out. As they got out of the elevator, there was a family taking a picture next to them. The flash from the camera blinded all of them momentarily…

…Time has no definition

And the mysteries can never be truly uncovered

What has been done can never be undone

What we do shapes us, and our choices good and bad make us who we are

What did you learn?

Phewww. I can't believe that was the last chapter... I mean really, I have been doing this for over a year and now it is done. Part of me is bit afraid that some will feel this conclusion to be bit fast or unsatisfying, but this story was never about the destination as much as the journey. It was never really about them getting back, it was more about the experiences and shenanigans they got up to while trying to get there. But never fear! Even when I just said it was the end... there still will be an epilogue and I'll make the proper closing remarks then for this story

#Soy Luna fanfiction #time travel #The Holy Trinity of ships #Lutteo #Gastina #Simbar #Soy Luna #Memories of time SL

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yeolmae-s · 3 years

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a chanbaek analysis from a veteran exo-l (part 2)

CLICK HERE TO READ PART ONE

Writing this was a bit harder in comparison to the first part, because I wanted to organize things into a neat timeline, but I ended up not having enough patience for it lol specially because both of ChanBaek's main archive blogs seem to have deleted their pages documenting each date of EXO's early years. Therefore I apologize in advance if this part is a bit more messy. Also, please don't forget that all of this is my opinion and I don't mean for any of it to be taken as truth!

I kind of want to jump from MAMA era directly into Wolf era, since we don't really have a lot of cover regarding their debut phase besides Chanyeol's overeagerness and Baekhyun's awkwardness towards it, so to sum it up, I felt as if Chanyeol was more confident and consistent on what he thought an idol should act like, while Baekhyun (sweet, innocent Baekhyun who was a trainee for less than a year!) was still unsure on how to act on camera.

On the few early variety shows/interviews EXO appeared on, the members always pointed out how funny Baekhyun was, how good he'd be at variety and at doing imitations, but he never really lived up to all the praise on camera, although off of it, he most likely was as good as his members claimed.

He was a bit stiff on his early days in comparison to what we see today, and that's normal, I guess, since he debuted really quickly, but when you compare him to Chanyeol the contrast is so interesting, because the latter was able to latch on to a persona as soon as the public gave him one, while to me, Baekhyun was still doubtful regarding what to put on display. In the end, deep inside, Baekhyun is a private person, and was even more so when he wasn't confident enough to talk to fans like he does today.

Once again, I’m sorry for not being able to upload the gifs directly into the post, so I’ll just link them like I did on my last one.

This is another one of the moments where Baek appears to tell Chanyeol to just. Hold on for a bit.

There's another one similar to this where Chanyeol does the same thing (try to whisper on Baekhyun's ear) and Baekhyun fake laughs and stares at a fan's camera right after. Then, his expression just goes blank. It's really interesting to watch because you can just see the gears spinning on Chanyeol's brain as he stares at Baekhyun for a second and clearly thinks alright, fanservice time, and leans in to whisper something: it happens so fast you just know it wasn't genuine whispering, just a playful interaction for the fans, and Baekhyun's direct stare to the camera as soon as it happens just confirms this for me.

1: Chanyeol spots his target.

2: He’s really thinking this through.

3: Baek's in a perfect position for whispering-time, so he leans in and does his thing.

4: Baekhyun laughs.

5: And stares directly at a fan's camera.

6: Immediately regrets his life choices. Chanyeol looks pleased.

It's actually better to watch the whole thing, so I'll leave it here. (starts on 0:28!)

(Random note: on this date EXO perfomed a cover of H.O.T's We Are The Future, and I feel like a lot of new EXO-Ls have not seem it and I adore this performance, so I'll link it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1-z4s3fdgo)

Now let's jump on to Wolf era, shall we?

Wolf era

I can't help but laugh when I think about how wild 2013 was for both EXO and EXO-Ls. They had their first hit song (which was Growl, not Wolf) the fandom grew considerably, shippers where just discovering the cute ISAC moments between "BaekYeol" and "HunHan"... Or at least that's how everyone remembers most of what happened during that year.

Are we forgetting the rumoured ChanBaek fight?

Considering their past interactions on airports, SMTOWN concerts, ISAC and other events, ChanBaek was now widely known to be close to each other. Baekhyun even said Chanyeol was the one who made him open up, and both of them mentioned feeling this "connection" to each other as soon as they met (although jokingly).

After Mama, the fandom was content-less for a considerable period of time, and what most people did was sharing around old performances and repeat overused memes. I think that in every fandom there is a period where fans establish their main inside jokes and basically just get together to create a collective line of thought for perceiving their idols. That being said, one of the most well established facts in the fandom was that Chanyeol and Baekhyun were close. That was a fact.But then Wolf came, and they suddenly were not.

This gif is a good example of how awkward their interactions were. Not even my delusional shipping brain in 2013 was able to come up with an explanation for it.

They simply did not acknowledge each other at all, and Chanyeol appeared to be closer to Kyungsoo (I think Baekhyun interacted a lot with Tao, but that may have been during the Growl era, not Wolf. As I said before, I'm a Chanyeol stan guys, sorry lmao).

Point is, these two boys who seemed to be best friends suddenly were clearly distant from one another.

What added fuel to the fire of the rumours was their appearance on Sukira, a radio show, where Sehun cried because the members sometimes had fights. Here's a fanacc:

[130530] EXO at Sukira

Sehun cried because the members sometimes fight.

Sehun: "Let's be loyal to each other, don't fight, and go until the end"

D.O: "We've been under a lot of stress lately because of the comeback, so I wish we won't fight in the future and do our best"

Here's a video cut of this part of their interview.

I think this ask on lets-talk-baekyeol, a popular ChanBaek analysis blog from back in the day, shows how curious a lot of fans were.

What happened back then?

There's really no answer for that. On my opinion, not even Chanyeol or Baekhyun could give us a concrete answer on it, because I don't think an actual fight happened. For me, it was most likely a personality clash, a disagreement that probably wasn't even voiced out loud, just both of them noticing how uncomfortable things got, if Baekhyun's reactions to Chanyeol's fanservice is any indication. I somehow doubt there was a specific episode that created this distance between them, specially because during Growl, they went back to being friends, although not as touchy on camera as before, as if one of them had established their limits (oh, I wonder who!), but I still have this feeling that all of this was unspoken, because unspoken things seem to be a pattern on ChanBaek's relationship (something I'll touch on later, hopefully).

But it was during Growl era that I noticed something else about Baekhyun.

Wolf era

EXO'S Showtime was a such a gift. I recommend reading lets-talk-baekyeol's blog for this. I don't really agree with everything they say they do present a lot of relevant points. I may repeat them here, since I noticed them myself as well, but credits for them nonetheless.

I remember finding the lack of ChanBaek interactions during the episodes really dissappointing, but considering the Wolf Era drought, this was better than nothing.

My 13 year old self was devastated when Baekhyun appeared so quiet during Chanyeol's birthday episode, and during a recent rewatch of it, I think realized why.

Baekhyun doesn't like superficial things. It's not that Chanyeol is insincere, but he's just better than Baekhyun is at handling people pleasing, even when he doesn't really mean what's he saying/doing. The Chanyeol birthday episode was heavily centered on Chanyeol's random admiration for Kai, which I think we can all agree that it was a little bit scripted or a really spur of the moment thing that they just ran along with and oh man. Baekhyun did not want to be part of it.

During ChanKai's hug, this is what he looked like on the background, and the poor boy even refused to eat cake. He's just in the back, which is weird, because he's such a talkative person and Chanyeol is one of his closest friends. The only moment where he seems to be genuinely comfortable is when Chanyeol blows the candle and it's really cute. To me, it seems that he was kind of embarrassed to witness so much acting from everyone else and was unable to participate because he struggles with things like this, but the moment Chanyeol blows his candles to comemorate his birthday seems sincere enough for him to fondly smile.

This ties in so well with everything from Mama Era. He's just unable to keep acting/people pleasing on the same easy way that Chanyeol does, but this time he's not as nervous about it as he was on his earlier-early days, where he probably felt pressured to actually do stuff. Now he just doesn't do **it, he just doesn't do something that he dislikes doing, and that sadly creates a distance between them on camera and probably on a deeper level in their relationship as well, because both are just realizing how different their perceptions over their jobs is.

There's also this moment that the mods on lets-talk-baekyeol pointed out.

On the Christmas episode, when the members leave the couch to go get their presents, Chanyeol stays seated while Baekhyun gets up to fetch his. This is the sitting arrangement before (almost) everyone got up:

But when Baekhyun comes back, there's free space next to Chanyeol, however he's hesitant to sit by his side. He actually hesitates and doesn't sit down. Jongdae even gives him a little push right after.

Baek just seems hesitant to do things on camera, to interact with Chanyeol in front of an audience. For this moment, I feel like he's afraid to sit next to Chanyeol and end up having to over act. It's not that Chanyeol himself makes him uncomfortable, but the image of the friendship that they ended up creating for fans demands a lot from him.

And when I say hesitant to do things on camera, I really do mean it, because when Baekhyun thinks he is not being recorded/seen, here's what he does:

Here and here.

Their relationship clearly changed, and I think the reason for it is actually simple: both of them were under the impression that they were compatible with each other when they actually were not. Their personalities are extremely different, even if the way they present themselves is sometimes similar. Wolf and Growl era was our way, as fans, of watching them navigate around each other and finding out how their relationship was supposed to work.

And you know what's nice about that? The members watched all of it unfold. Their reactions to some of ChanBaek's interaction is a gold mine when it comes to analyzing them, because they clearly know, just as we do, that their relationship is kind of complicated. But I want to talk about it on the next part.

I am sorry for cutting this off again! I don't know if the next part is going to be the last, because after Growl there's Overdose and we all know what happened on 2014 [coughs] dating scandal [coughs] god help me I don't want to talk about it [coughs] so there's a lot to uncover and I need time to organize stuff.

Thank you for reading!

#chanbaek #baekyeol #baekhyun #chanyeol #park chanyeol #byun baekhyun #exo #kpop

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nooneelsecomesclose17 · 4 years

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You are the absolute best idea I ever had - part 1

Ok so I’m still not sure about doing the chapter thing because it’s been so long since I wrote anything I have no idea how long my inspiration will last (or my fingers for that matter) but let’s go for it. *bites nails nervously*

Thanks as always to @amandaj718 for listening to me ramble about this and convincing me it was a good idea. It’s based on Red, White and Royal Blue, probably fairly loosely in some bits and more in others. We’ll see.

(They’re a similar age here and about Aaron’s age on the show when they met, maybe a bit younger, but it’s not vitally important)

AO3 Link

*******

Robert looked round the room as he dumped his bag on the bed. It did look comfortable he supposed, but that didn’t mask the fact that he didn’t want to be here. The room itself was nothing special, nothing like most people would expect in the home of the British Prime Minister he had no doubt. It was bigger than he expected, no doubt thanks to the Blairs and their renovations back in the day. It wasn’t his home though. He had a flat, a perfectly nice flat in the middle of the city that suited him and yet here he was.

“You’re here then.” He turns to see his Dad standing in the doorway, suit as immaculate as always. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen him look casual, even when his Mum used to force him into a sweater or polo shirt during the summer.

“You didn’t give me much choice.” He’d expected the call, as soon as he’d woken up to a phone full of news notifications. He supposes it’s not every day the son of one of the most popular Prime Ministers in recent history is caught red handed with the sister of his beloved wife. It didn’t matter that in private their marriage had been over for months, that Chrissie was already with someone else. No, he was the one at fault, all manner of rumours doing the rounds, because they’d kept their separation private so as not to harm his father’s reputation.

What rankled most, as it had most of his life, was that his Dad hadn’t even called himself, not even his closest assistant had been the one to make the call, a lowly staffer was all he got, telling him that ‘the PM thinks it best you move into 10 Downing Street for the foreseeable’.

It wasn’t that he wanted to be front page news, he didn’t go looking for it like some, but ever since his father had swept to power on a promise of reuniting the country, the press had been on him like bees round a honeypot, half the time making up their own gossip without him even leaving his living room. He wasn’t like his brother, the fine upstanding Andy, who still ran the farm that their Dad had grown up on, Andy with the sick daughter who everyone doted on, including Robert, he’s not that terrible a human being. Then there was Vic, the darling of the press, who smiled and waved every time she left the building, who would often take some of her newest creations out to the waiting press gaggle for them to try. Robert was just trying to live his life, but that wasn’t good enough, never had been.

“I need you to come with me tonight. I think it would be a good idea for people to see you doing some good for a change. Diane is already attending a charity event.”

“Where is it?”

“The palace. Be ready for 7.” He turned to leave. “And Robert, I don’t want any silliness, not like last time.”

Honestly, you get slightly merry one time at a Downing Street party and you never hear the end of it. It’s not like he declared war on anyone, he just, well he might’ve broken a vase. It was hideous anyway and deserved to be broken, but apparently it’d been a gift from some country or other that the country needed to trade with. Robert really didn’t think that trade deals depended on a frankly ugly piece of china but as had been pointed out to him many many times he knew nothing about politics and should keep his nose out.

It wasn’t that he was politically ignorant, he voted, he read the news, he researched anything that might be relevant to him or his job, but after years of hearing his parents fighting because his Dad was forever away from home or spending more time sorting out his constituents problems than those in his own family, as far as he was concerned the whole thing was a pantomime. The happy family that had stood on the steps outside, smiling and waving, was nothing but a charade. He and Andy barely spoke, which was fine by him, his Dad could barely stand the sight of him and Diane and Victoria just wanted them all to get along and that meant Robert should shut up and get on with it.

“Robert?” He stops unpacking and turns to see his little sister leaning on the doorframe, hair done up in her usual braid, already coming loose at the front. She’s holding a plate in her hand, his favourite flavour of doughnut sitting proudly on top. He’s missed her. The downside to avoiding his Dad is that he doesn’t see her as much as he likes.

“Hiya trouble.” He pulls her into a hug. “That for me?”

“Thought you might need it. Dad said you were going with him tonight?” She hands him the plate before bouncing on the bed. Sometimes it’s hard to believe she’s a fully fledged adult.

“Not willingly.” He mumbles around his food. “This ’s good.”

“It’s boring is what it is. Why won’t you try some of my other flavours?”

“Because you do not mess with jam doughnuts Vic. Some things have to remain sacred in this world.” He smiles a little at her huff and licks the sugar from his fingers before joining her on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather go tonight?”

“I went last time. Besides, it’ll give you the chance to stare at you know who all night.” He groans, regretting once more the late night conversation a few years ago when he was still living at home.

“I hate you.”

“You love me.”

“Debatable. Anyway I don’t want to stare at anyone, least of all him.”

“So the words His Royal Hotness didn’t pass your lips?”

“Vodka had passed my lips.”

“So you don’t fancy the second in line to the throne then?” He shakes his head at her, irritated but loving her all the same. She was the only one of them who knew he was bi, well no, he supposed his Dad did even if they’d never actually managed a conversation. He idly wonders what it’d be like to tell everyone what had happened, the see the scales fall from the eyes of the nation about their perfect leader. He’d never do it, would never hurt Vic like that, but sometimes the look on his Dad’s face if he did would comfort him somehow.

“No!” He could admit, if pushed that Aaron was good looking, he wasn’t blind, but so were lots of people.

“Hm.”

“The man never smiles Vic. Last year, at his cousin’s wedding, did you even see him without a scowl?”

“You took notice of him then?” He half heartedly smacks her arm, making her laugh. “I’m glad you’re here, Rob, I missed you.”

“I’ve been here.” It’s lame, because he hasn’t, not really.

“I mean more than a couple of texts and a phone call once a month. How long are you going to be here?”

“Until I’m not grounded anymore.”

“Idiot. I’m going, Adam’s picking me up at 4.” She’s gone before he can even ask who Adam is. It just proves how distant he’s been from her and he feels guilty all over again.

*******

“I meant what I said Robert, best behaviour tonight. I think you’ve made enough headlines with your dalliances for a while, don’t you?” It’s on the tip of his tongue to drag up Rachel, something else that no one knows but family, but he stops himself. It’s not worth the hassle. Hopefully if he gets through tonight he won’t be asked again for a long while.

“Just once it’d be nice if you pretended to have even an ounce of faith in me. You do know Chrissie is right now shacked up with someone else, don’t you? And was before I went anywhere near Rebecca.”

“No one cares about that. Just behave yourself. Is that too much to ask? This isn’t just some party, it’s the Queen and her family. Show some respect.”

Privately he thought that Queen Faith looked rather fun and would be quite at home gossiping over a few glasses of red rather than endlessly shaking hands but he keeps it to himself as they pull up the gates of the palace. He can’t help looking up at the building a little in awe. He’s wouldn’t really class himself as a monarchist, but he doesn’t wish any of them any ill, and he watches all the pomp and ceremony on TV like everyone else. He just doesn’t particularly want to spend the night minding his P’s and Q’s because he’s really not all that good at it.

He takes a deep breath as the car stops and the door is opened. As he watches his Dad step out he can’t help but think his world has really taken a turn in the last 24 hours.

#I am incredibly nervous #because it's been a year almost #but here you go #enjoy #i'm taking liberties with lots about politics and the royals but hey who doesn't #right?#robron fic

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scandeniall · 4 years

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Dear Diary

song 1: dear diary | good & bad masterlist | prev | next

Pairing: sakusa x reader

Summary/warnings: life has been kicking your ass yet you don’t want to tell sakusa/profanity

WC: 1.5K

“How’ve you been,” you paused debating on answering honestly or not. Switching your phone to speaker, you fiddled with the covers resting beneath your fingers before sighing out. “I miss you Yoomi.” A silence comes settled through the phone line. “How are you doing?” The insistence of your well being causes another sigh to escape your lips. Of course he could tell that something was off even through the phone and a part of you curses his observational skills. “Im just--really fucking stressed,” you mutter out reluctantly.

“Have you been taking care of yourself? Eating real meals and getting proper sleep?” The questions being rattled off on the other side of the phone causes you to crack a small smile at his concern. You could only imagine the furrow in his brows at the thought of a lack of concern for your own health. You almost miss the ending of the questions as he tells you not to lie to him. Your silence causes Sakusa to sigh on the line.

“Sometimes I hate how much you really know me.” You voice the thoughts that had previously been in your head. Sakusa could hear the slightest of background noise as you maneuver yourself under the warm comforter and shifted to get comfortable. “Do you need me to come home.” The words aren’t phrased as a question, and that causes you to quickly shake your head despite the fact that he couldn't see that.

“No-no. Yoomi, it's fine. I just- I just need to get my mind right and relax. I just needed to hear your voice tonight, that's all.” You tell him, despite wanting nothing more than for him to be back with you.He’d been on the road for the last month, a series of away games and such. And right before he left, you’d been out of town on a major business trip. It seemed as if time nor luck were your friend. It’d been at least a month and a half since the two of you were anywhere near one another. He’d still be gone another month and all either of you could do was wait it out.

The silence that followed your response was telling. You could already imagine the way Sakusa has his eyes narrowed in thought. Thinking about whether he should push for your well being or let it go for now. The quietest sigh escaped his mouth from the other side of the phone. He’d made his decision. “I miss you too. I’ll be home soon.”

Life after that phone call seemed to grow progressively worse. Not only had you and Sakusa not been able to squeeze in another talk in the following week, but life sucked. Your job has been giving you more and more responsibility, and allowing you more freedom. On one hand that was great, a celebratory text sent to your boyfriend at the talks of you in for a promotion, however it was tiring. You were coming home later and later, exhausted and starting to neglect your own health.

It’s not you were intentional in the neglect. It just felt too damn hard to come home after a long day and cook a healthy and fulfilling meal. When you were home you were suddenly reminded of just how empty the apartment was without Sakusa. Dust that was normally absent due to his cleanliness began to appear. Dishes piled up more than he would have liked. Whenever you did bother to straighten up at least for his sake, it drained you.

Adulthood was really kicking your ass and it came to a head one night when you woke up sweating. As if life couldn’t drag you down even more, your AC had gone out right during the hottest part of the summer. Come morning you found out that your landlord had gone on vacation and could not and would not be able to fix the unit for at least a week.

So you’d done what you usually did. Sucked it up and forced yourself to push through. Not a word of your woes to Sakusa who had more important matters to attend to other than your slump. You went to work, exhausted yourself there and dragged your feet into the dreaded heat of your apartment.

Upon entering you were automatically hit with a wave of heat, making your already sluggish steps heavier. Kicking your shoes off you offhandedly waved hello to the person seated on the couch before dragging yourself towards the kitchen like it was completely normal. A moment later you stopped in your tracks. “Yoomi?”

The slightest nod from your boyfriend caused you to blink in surprise before launching yourself into his arms. “What are you doing here,” you muttered as his hands ran up and down your back. Pulling away slightly you eyed him. He looked tired. Eyes unusually sunken and you noticed the tiniest sheen of sweat across his forehead. You went to pull away knowing the touch paired with the heat would likely make him uncomfortable. To your surprise, the hands wrapped around your middle didn’t make any moves to release you. “You needed me so I came home.”

You felt a squeeze in your heart as your arms tightened wrapped around his shoulders. “But I didn't say anything—“

“Your voice. On the other week. And then your texts were different.” Of course he noticed. The conversation had already signaled to him that you weren’t the best. Your shaky exhales as you insisted that you were fine and that he didn’t need to come home. Then he noticed the jokes within your texts began to slowly subside. You’d also found yourself saying that you missed him more than usual. “So you came back?”

“I have a 3 day weekend this week. Then I’m back to practicing.” You nodded in understanding the two of you releasing one another and you noticed Sakusa frown. “Why’s it hot?” You explained about the broken AC and about the suffering you’ve endured for the past 2 days. “Did you get any more fans?” He looked annoyed once you denied purchasing any additional appliances knowing he’d had to get that done for you. “You know you’re more susceptible to nosebleeds in the heat right?”

“Thank you Dr. Omi,” you teased, laughing at his scowl from the nickname. The two of you settled onto the couch, your head coming to rest on his shoulder. “It’s common knowledge.” His replies allow a lightness to settle in your heart. One you hadn’t felt in weeks. The two of you settle into a silence for a little while his hand rubbing soft circles on your knee. “You need to take better care of yourself. And tell me when you need me.”

“I didn't want to take you away from your busy schedule,” you hum out. You feel the movement against your knee stop, a former grip replacing it. “I don't care how busy I am, I’m here. Now stop being annoying and tell me things.” You feel yourself jokingly roll your eyes before agreeing. However that wasn’t enough as you heard the scoff from next to you.

“I’m serious. You remember what you told me back in college”

“Pretty sure I told you a lot of things back then,” you tease, taking his closest hand and interlocking your fingers. “You believed in me,” he started catching your eyes. “Told me you always knew there was no limit to me. That means I can handle it. Don’t feel like you’re annoying me.” Your eyes widened at how he remembered that very specific moment.

It was around 4 years ago. He’d just told you that he signed to MSBY, something everyone around him was dying to know. Yet you were the first person he told. He remembered how your eyes beamed as you sat on his lap, your phone camera in his face recording the moment for memories sake. He didn’t even bother swatting it away like he usually did. He’d allowed you to place messy kisses all across his face despite the feel of your tacky chapstick. “Why do you remember that,” you questioned a soft smile gracing your own features.

You notice the shrug of his shoulders as he helped to to sit you sideways into his lap. “Doesn’t matter. Now tell me what’s wrong. And then we’re going to get some fans.” You nodded leaning so that your lips met his for a soft kiss. “I really missed you,” you murmured into the kiss. And while he was only there for the weekend it was enough. He came home for you. The one who has loved and supported him with open arms for the past 5 years. He’d be damned if he didn’t try to make up for it.

So you told him everything on your mind. Laughing every time he scolded you for the little things. “Don’t let the dust build up by the time I get back next month.” To “You need to sleep more.” And in return you got the same. You got the story from the exhaustion laced in his eyes. The hours it took to get to you, and the germs he forced himself to sit through to make it happen. And despite the annoying heat in the apartment, neither of you have felt that good in a while.

a/n: wow i FINALLY got at least 2 consective songs in a row done so now my prev/next is relevant for at least 2 parts. This took a different route than I initially planned for, nor is it exact in its storytelling. It was also started 2 months ago and finished now bc it was kinda hard for me. Anyways hi um did you catch the no limit to you ref? bc yeah i love that and to date still my fav piece ive ever written. you dont have to read that to understand this but its 5.4k words if you have some spare time.

anyways: im about to be on an 8hr car ride so feel free to request stuff. rules

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #sakusa x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu imagine #hq imagine #hq imagines #sakusa imagines

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reginaofdoctorwho · 3 years

Text

weird shit that would probably have something to do with me in a horror movie

no one wanted this but i’m bored and found a bottle so you’re all getting it. yes these are all true. check the tags, if u think i’ve missed something please let me know!

there was a murder (technically, i don’t really count it as a murder) next door when i was four years old on christmas morning

the weird antique glass bottle i found half-buried in the woods in the woods yesterday with living bugs in it that made no attempt to leave it once i uncovered it

there is a local cult in the next town over. this is not the same as the local cult that was in the other town over where my mom grew up

random completed animal skeletons in the woods behind our house, i’m talking prey and predator, both laid out like in a goddamn scientific diagram. for a while there’d be ones in the middle of our yard, always the same type of animal, always just the bones and nothing else, laid out like it was posed. this has been happening for over half a decade and we have no fucking clue how, why, or who is doing it

the screaming from the woods that i’m going to assume is a fox

my sister almost dated a murderer. his niece or something is in my class

there is a house that is now part of a “local ghost tour” that belonged to my great+ grand parents during the civil war where my great+ aunt died allegedly murdered by her husband who is actually blood related to me. family history says she died of childbirth, which given that it was the 1800s... probably is true

there was an actual murderer in our family a few generations back but he married in and killed his wife and her sister. they didn’t find out about it until they read his journals after he died where it apparently told everything he did and they decided. “well, that wouldn’t look good for the family, and they’re already dead anyway” and just kept it hidden??

the fact we have my great great grandmother’s dress from probably 1890s or 1900s. even more so the fact that i fit in it. if this was fantasy horror (vampires, some immortal thing or ghost) i’d be fucking dead or cursed

fairly certain i was possessed by the ghost of a puritan as a kid

my family seems to have a curse with babies and nurses? my great uncle died when he was born because long story short, hospitals were the new hot thing, he was perfectly healthy, then a nurse dropped him and he died instantly. my sister died when she was a toddler and the hospital actively tried to delete her hospital records to cover it up and ended up getting fined by the state for it. the nurses responsible were not arrested or punished in any way.

my family all has fucked up connective tissue, in my brother it was bad enough he had to get a steel bar in his chest so it wouldn’t cave in.

the many times i have almost drowned, sometimes due to intentional actions by humans (my dad, it was my dad)

this in addition to the other fucked up shit he did before the divorce when he still lived here, including but not limited to: killing my mom’s favorite pet goat, hanging its skull in a tree, and leaving the body in the woods. not letting his kids learn how to cook. anytime someone asked him to cook he’d put as much pepper/hot sauce in as he could (even for like, scrambled eggs) and give it to the youngest person, usually a toddler. this was me at times. taking his kids out to the woods and threatening murder. taking his kids out to the woods and threatening burning. purposely locked the basement from the inside so we couldn’t get the gaping hole in the stairs leading to one of three kids rooms fixed. tearing up pictures of the kids whenever my mom did something he didn’t like. i had more here but i tried to cut it down a litttle

people have threatened to murder me before. one time a girl didn’t threaten, and actually acted like she was starting to like me, but her cousin read her diary or something and found out she was planning to commit a lot of murder, and told her parents and she got sent to a psychiatric ward for a couple weeks

my mom lived down the street from a family that got axe-murdered by one of their two sons when she was a kid. the murderer did get out on an insanity plea and is still in the area. also their neighbor’s mom “lost her mind” (how the story was told) when she had to protect their kids while her husband went over to try to protect the non murderer son when he got home from school and ran over screaming about his brother trying to kill him and had killed their parents

also she knew a girl who almost got kidnapped by this really fucked up traveling serial killer that has his own wikipedia page that is,,, lengthy. the girl had [alleged] mafia ties, and the guy ended up dying shot by police despite them being told to bring him in, which sounds kinda suspicious

long story short i’d probably be the sequel where one comes back

apparently i go to the “bad” school, which i found out in a coffee shop when i overheard two girls talking about how one’s dad went there and how horrible and dangerous it is

school fights are weird. either they don’t happen or they come freakishly close to murder. people slam heads into lockers, stomp on bones, drag people by hair along the ground. one time in my brother’s class a 4′9″ girl sent a 6′2″ football player to the hospital. there was video of a fight a couple years ago that’s still around. it was brutal, but also one of the girls fighting was taking one for the team in it and got the other kicked out

we don’t have a ceiling in all of the third floor, and the cafeteria has 2. this is not relevant in any way, but it’s important to me that you know this

also the guys kept ripping the heating vents/radiators/whatever off the walls in their bathrooms and got almost all the bathrooms locked. including the girls’ ones.

also everyone kept punching holes in the walls so on some of them it’s just,,, metal sheeting down the whole hallway

there are so many fucking shootings in the next town over. literally five years ago it was this nice place where kids would go on history tours, i did when my sister worked for that group. now there is pretty much one business that has not been held up at gunpoint, and if u look up to the serial killer bullet point, it is for v similar ties. it’s a pizza place and if u ever stop by u gotta try it

women in my family have weirdly good intuition but every couple generations we get doubtful. my great grandma didn’t want a hospital birth but decided “hey it’s the hot new thing for a reason”, my mom switched churches based on nothing but intuition and it turned out someone was a pedophile there (found out years later), i instantly could tell my friend’s boyfriend was a pos and wasn’t surprised later when he told her he’d murder and dismember me in front of her, and upon meeting him told him he was a fucking coward and couldn’t do it. he broke up with her a month later.

i was really good friends for a while with two guys that burned a building down. yes they were arrested. i was friends before and after the fire. they’re pretty nice, but this girl they used to date (at different times, they were brothers, yes it was fucking weird and uncomfortable for everyone involved except her but that’s it’s own thing) said some fucked up shit and it was the closest i ever got to starting a fight. anyway i’m still friends with both on facebook. one of them shares a lot of king of the hill memes

speaking of that fight, i 100% would’ve tried to kill her in that moment. u know that john mulaney quote like “i didn’t understand how a person could want to kill another person. then i got cheated on, and i was like ‘oh, okay.’”? that was me, but replace “cheated on” with she told me it was good my five year old sister was dead because she was a waste, and told me she hoped i’d die of covid”. it was mainly the sister thing. i couldn’t move because if i did i’d start a fight with the [way] above mentioned shit.

my family has a literal feud with a local farming family. i mean, we keep farm animals (sheep, goats, chickens), these people have that, pigs, and crops too. the feud was because their great uncle (or great grand uncle, i’m a little fuzzy on the details) published an autobiography (despite not being anyone famous/important) and in it talked about when he was friends with my grandfather and how creepy my great grandfather was (this was the one with the dead firstborn son) because he kept newspaper clippings of the Lindbergh baby’s kidnapping and murder pinned to a board on the wall of his office/basement. also because he was a child of german immigrants who wanted to fight against nazis in WW2 (how suspicious [sarcasm]). members of their family are in my grade. they charged my sister for almost half an extra pound of goods, too, which just revitalized it.

i live by corn fields. i am surrounded by cornfields. (joke one)

i was friends for a while with this girl whose baby teeth,,, didn’t really fall out completely? she was 17 the last time i saw her in person, she’s probably 19 now and judging by her facebook pictures they’re still Like That. she had a very symmetrical mouth/teeth, which made it weirder. just to clarify, she had some of her baby teeth pushed forward and up, so they kind pointed out a little? and all her adult teeth. she was literally so pretty.

a teacher who is v sexual with his female students came into my english class (he is a science teacher) to demand why i wasn’t signed up for his class. we then both became increasingly passive aggressive and he told the whole class where i live with specific directions and landmarks. the guy sitting next to me had to try to tone things down despite being obviously confused as to why it was even happening (me too buddy). he lives down the road from my sister. when my niece had her birthday party at our house i was outside setting things up and he slowed his car down and honked at me. fuckin creep

#tw child death #tw animal death #tw arson #i guess?#tw shooting #tw murder #a lot of that one actually #tw child abuse #tw violence #let me know if u think i should tag anything else #no one wanted this #except for me #tw cult

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halfgodly · 3 years

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* loud honking clown noises * besties ! i have missed you all dearly . i'm briar and i was here previously for two seconds becos this semester was . . . phew ! i also just ran through 4 blogs becos tumblr kept flagging me as explicit so i have literally fought hurdles and am finally here to present you all with my son . click 🌼 & 🌷 for his statistics and connections page . under the cut , you'll find his background ! boop that heart if you want to plot with us ! p.s , i am simply an ooga booga and don’t have a discord !

@gallagherintro

i'm going to keep this as short and simple as possible becos i HATE tumblr and i'm literally tired from fighting with it all day . . . you will find mentions of the following triggers : murder , death , and in general some dark themes .

the kwon's are considered espionage royalty . his father is the current headmaster at a spy prep school in england , where the family hq is located , and his mother often works globally with intelligence and provides expertise and aid to top officials . youngest of three .

what can i compare the kwon's in modern relevance to understand them better ? i'd say the mandalorians would be the closest . their clan has relished in their notoriety for their violent nature , their ability to dominate the art of combat , and the glory which followed after victory .

despite their ~mysteriousness~ and their almost celebrity-like status , the kwon's had a dark . . . dark secret . this secret is what lead them to be undefeated in times of danger , the reason for their infamy , and the basis of rumors that were spoken in hushed whispers , swirling around them .

as soon as they turn sixteen , selected members of the kwon family are sent to a family-funded 'program' ( this program is not limited to just family members , they are prioritized , but anyone who is deemed worthy of having these skills/traits are welcome to enroll ) , located in the swiss alps within the confines of a kwon family estate . this program mirrors the red room program , dedicated to honing the skills of an assassin and being the best of the best . kwon's would never tolerate anything else .

neo joins the program , along with a handful of cousins and others who have managed to make the cut . he bounces back and forth from attending the spy prep school his father looks after and returning back to the estate during any time off to continue to train . the point of the program was to essentially create weapons of flesh ; faster than a bullet and deadlier than a knife .

he excels and lives for it , his name appearing as number one in multiple different classes . family gossip begins to unwind , talks of neo being the new heir instead . at school , he's the golden boy , too . and it's all fun until it's not . as time passes on , members of the program dwindle down until there is only a handful remaining . and then , there was two .

neo and his favorite cousin , born the same year , have been attached at the hip since they were born . only a few months separated them apart , but that was the only instance they weren't close . his cousin attended the same prep school as him as well as being enrolled in the program , so they spent a lot of time together .

( death & murder trigger ) to finish the program , there must only be one person remaining . death had lingered in the air since the start of the program , the reason why only a few remained behind . whether they died during a mission or one-to-one combat , to earn the title of being the best , there could be only one . it's a day he never expected , never envisioned being at war with his favorite person in the world , but it comes . through tears and blood , screams and sobs , neo wins . but at what cost ?

he becomes an utter shell of a person after . he refuses to look his family in the eye , bitter resentment growing in his heart . they applaud him and crown him as the heir , the next-in-line to their ancient throne , but god he doesn't want it . he doesn't fucking want it anymore . but he's earned it , and the bloodbath was evidence of it . the rest of his years are spent continuing to train and attending school . his name carries a venom and notoriety that only could match the impact of his surname , plainly stating no one wanted to fuck with him . there were always murmurs about the 'program' , but most people brushed it aside as 'kwon family urban legends' and no one ever asked him about it . only a select few are allowed into his crowd , and they all walk behind him like a giant shadow . he's never alone , but always feels like it .

to ease the aches , neo is always partying . drinking , getting high , sleeping around . you name it , he's probably doing it , if it's not already done . everything that can be used as a distraction , he will use . doesn't think twice about using others as puppets , forms of entertainment that momentarily make the pain go away . has consistent nightmares if he doesn't go to sleep not sober , wakes up in sweats nonetheless . got into a brutal fist-fight on his first day at gallagher ( they asked about the program , if you were curious ) and family connections saved his ass from being expelled . slowly , but surely , learning to untwine these traumas and troubles . old habits die hard , as they say , so he's still back on his bullshit ! he never really left it , though . a bit more approachable and easier to talk to than before , but he strictly hangs out with his crew almost exclusively . extremely competitive and ranks high within his classes . his family occasionally visit gallagher's , and it's the only time he's on his best behavior ( if you see neo smiling no you didn't <3 ) . no one really knows what's going on his head , but i can promise you , you probably don't want to find that out . he's just trying his best , i promise !

* neo kwon is a brand-new spankin' muse , so all of this may be altered , deleted , or added onto !

#gallagher:intro #YA'LL . I AM SO WINDED I HAVE BEEN DEALING WITH BEING FLAGGED SINCE LAST NIGHTTTT .#please shoot some kissys my way to restore my hp <3

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movedkagen · 4 years

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NATSUO TODOROKI STUDY / MASTERPOST .

This is also mostly ripped from discord so if it’s choppy that’s why ---

TRIGGER WARNINGS : DOMESTIC ABUSE, CHILD ABUSE, LOSS OF A SIBLING, ANGER ISSUES, BODY PERCEPTION ISSUES.

Natsuo is loyal. Literally he loves his family so much. like between natsuo and fuyumi, fuyumi has the stronger quirk 100%. Natsuo HAS an ice quirk but he can only freeze things that fit into the palm of his hand...so all he does is make the cola nice and cold before his siblings drink it.

So Natsuo wants to be a family practice doctor and he wants to do outreach work. Pretty much his coping mechanism with being ignored and hating being home is he threw himself really hard into studies, and just did his HW all night in his room. To tune out the yelling anf the negligence. He got good enough grades where he got into University of Tokyo which is good but like basically he almost didn't go bc like.

his relationship w enji is nonexistent. He was an immediate failure in his eyes, he literally SAID enji didn't look him in the eye ever until recently....he never rly saw him or hung around him. and then like. by the time touya was starting to rly get shit / by the time he was "dead" and shouto got burned and rei got sent away natsuo was only five or so. So to Natsuo? enji was just the guy who lived in his house and ruined his life basically. he hated him. he didn't love him at all. He’s hated him since he was a small child. NATSUO WILL NEVER FORGIVE ENJI AND HAS NO DESIRE TO.

Me and Inad have discussed it but because fuyumi is the only girl, Natsuo is the true middle child. The one who was never looked at or spoken to by Enji. And FUCK ENDEAVOR STANS for saying otherwise, but natsuo ISN’T ��the only child who wasn’t abused” or the one who “should be the least angry”. Negligence IS child abuse.

As a kid, Natsuo had a stutter. He acted like a baby for a long time. He was also chubby as a kid -- ate a lot to cope. He was always bigger than Touya, and it continues into adulthood --- Natsuo is now. thick / buff. He was a chubby kid growing up, but now he works out and has muscle however he still also stress eats bc premed is hard and gains like 15 pounds during the school year, then loses it during breaks. it's just the way his body is. This is relevant because Natsuo does have extremely low self esteem -- he thinks he’s very plain looking, that his body is big and awkward and ugly (I have him as growing to be 6′6″ at his full height, taller than Enji), and it all stems from Enji’s negligence. At his core, because of his father, Natsuo believes there is absolutely nothing special about him and that physically and personally he is a worthless person.

Natsuo has anger issues unfortunately (as we’ve seen) but does judo to let it out. tbh he storms out of the house a lot because he doesn’t want fuyumi to see him fucking lose it.

me and inad discussed this but but natsuo HAS put a hole in the wall before and Like he was maybe 15 when that happened. it scared the shit out of fuyumi and he felt so upset he literally like. ran away for two days and when he came back he cried rly hard and promised she would never see him lose his temper like that again, so he storms out so she doesn't see him angry. It was the summer before he started high school and as soon as he got into high school he started getting into judo and joined the club for it and that's been his outlet ever since. And whenever he storms out of the house it’s to go do that. He's ashamed of reminding her of endeavor somehow. he knows he’s got enji’s hairstyle and body type, and that contributes to why he hates his appearance so much.

The reason he never brings his S/O around his house is honestly that... he doesn’t like himself when he’s home. ppl love 2 say natsuo has the least right to be mad because enji didn't "abuse him" but don't realize negligence is abuse. it's literally classified as abuse. he was literally born thinking his dad felt he was a disappointment to the point where he didn't talk to him or let him talk to his youngest brother and it HAS an effect on him. natsuo has a lot of self perception issues, he thinks he's ugly and he panics if he doesn't do things perfectly in school and just. is very easily made to feel inferior and puts himself down. he doesn't consider himself special at all. He believes he lacks intrinsic worth as a human being.

Natsuo only went to college after his sister told him to go and do what he wanted to do…I promise you he was going to not go at all and was going to stay home with her until she told him she wanted him to go. BECAUSE natsuo doesn't rly consider enji a member of the family at all, natsuo has this goofy lil quirk where he thinks he's the "man of the house" even tho he asks fuyumi for help with basic things!!! most of the time it's funny but it's honestly just him being protective of her. And natsuo does cope with some perceptions of toxic masculinity --- he’s NOT abusive at all himself, but he’s goofy in the sense that he thinks he has to be the New man of the house, has to take care of his sister, has to never cry or show weakness, all because he’s male.

ENJI TAKES NO PART IN PAYING FOR NATSUO’S TUITION. He doesn’t even agree to go until Fuyumi insists she will use her own money to pay for it, and Natsuo works and studies because he wants to pay her back for every cent someday. Endeavor DOES NOT EVEN KNOW natsuo’s current address or which exact school he attends. natsuo wants it that way, but it’s also important to note that Enji never bothered asking.

Honestly Natsuo and Fuyumi probably argue a lot about endeavor, But that’s okay because they still love each other. Natsuo knows fuyumi puts everyone above herself and rly wants her to be happy, which is why.......frankly.....he’s glad kenta barreled into their lives. Because he’s like this is something Just For Her and I hope she likes him and it works out.

continuing on natsuo hates heroes and he hates his dad and frankly if he had a strong enough quirk he would have probably become like dabi. he really would have and he truly hates endeavor that much.

sb: so u agree with stain? natsuo: idk i just want someone to kill my dad.

Natsuo doesn't forgive endeavor, doesn't fuck with him, and blames him for everything that went wrong in his family. He honestly wants him to die! and he HATES the hero industry bc a literal monster like his father is praised and rewarded and they HELPED COVER UP TOUYA'S DEATH!!!!

and like with natsuo + touya.... time for pain. “Touya told me everything” / “I still hear his voice constantly” ... i think about those quotes always every time i think of natsuo. natsuo was the closest with touya and I truly believe that. He loved him more than anything . He really loved touya so much and he never got over losing him.

kinda like inad hcs fuyumi saw shouto in the kitchen, i think natsuo saw touya last bc the way he describes touya telling him.... natsuo is shaking when he says it like. That shit traumatized him. And he’s just so angry. He did not leave touya. They had to PRY NATSUO OFF OF HIM. Because natsuo is loyal.

like me and inad hc that fuyumi wouldn’t tell Natsuo where rei was for years because she knew even at 9 years old, he would have snuck on a bus to see her. Natsuo is so loyal to his family he loves them so much. He would have done anything for them. He wouldn’t have left Touya. He wouldn't have let touya go without him there. Not anywhere he couldn’t follow. Not even as a child.

and natsuo would NEVER be able to juxtapose that dabi isn't touya. I think the first time he saw Touya he would know but it wouldn’t be like. An instant look. He’s probably seen clips of some of the shit he’s done on tape and it’s always given him this unsettling feeling. But then he looks in his eyes...and he knows his eyes.

I always picture it like Natsuo forgetting however dangerous the surrounding is and chasing after him, he doesn’t even know why he’s running; he knows he wouldn’t stand a chance against him. But he sounds like a child again when he says “Touya?”. He sounds like the annoying, chubby little brother that followed him everywhere. And yeah, he would simply need that confirmation that Touya is alive to take his side because he knows more than fuyumi did. Simply seeing him alive again, and I think he’d know EXACTLY what Dabi wanted to do with Enji.

Dabi trying to scare Natsuo and Natsuo just “Touya cut it out talk to me” / “Touya I’m on your side” and it’s because Natsuo could never EVER see Dabi as a monster once he knows it’s Touya. I don’t think he could ever feel fear based simply on the fact that he loved him that much. Touya was his favorite sibling he followed him around like a puppy and copied everything he did.

Touya is the sibling he was closest to and i think the same in reverse since Natsuo is the one Touya vented to. I think fuyumi was probably really shocked when they were kids and Natsuo would suddenly say he hated enji. that he wished he was dead. She’d gasp and be like "Natsuo!"

But he’s HATED HIS GUTS since he was a little kid. He didn’t grow to resent him either. He basically didn’t care about him/was afraid of him when he was super super young, but the moment touya’s quirk didn’t work out and he was like what, 7-10? I’d say like 7 or 8 when shit started just Not Working. Natsuo was probably 4 or 5 when his own quirk manifested and was weak. Had this initial “why doesn’t dad like me” phase, but Touya just told him once something endeavor did to him or why his skin is starting to scar, and Natsuo instantly went from fear to hate. There was no build he simply hated him from that moment on. That’s how loyal he is!

He said he hated endeavor for the first time when he was five, but anyway i think a lot abt how natsuo like.... has the least ties w them all. That's why I say he’s a true middle child because he doesn’t have anything he’s good at that binds him to the family or makes him especially important to anyone. Like...he CARES about and loves shouto of course but i think if fuyumi weren't there natsuo wouldnt be in the picture at all. He just wouldn’t talk to them. Especially before he started talking to shouto? Absolutely. After now that he talks to him he would definitely stay to hang around him but before?

unfortunately because enji KEPT SHOUTO AWAY FROM THEM i think about how natsuo probably had what inasa felt where he saw shouto's eyes and saw endeavor and like. kept up that distance because of the trauma (tm) and i think when shouto got some friends and got out the house he tried talking to natsuo and natsuo was like "wait...me? you're...talking to me?" and like as soon as shouto started trying to talk to him he was rly receptive and was like shit i have 15 yrs of info to catch up on.

but i rly think that's their relationship bc he literally didn't even know what kinda food shouto liked until now?? but he loves himand has become instantly very protective of him and once again things that because he’s the big brother he HAS to teach him things and be his “positive figure” and frankly I think shouto feels a little thrill whenever natsuo openly shittalks their father because out of all of them natsuo IS the one who hates him the most openly.

#* HOWL » saved.#OK THIS IS THE OTHER ONE.

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axelsagewrites · 6 years

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Keep Your Enemies Close*Sebastian Smythe

Requested via wattpad

Can you do an imagine where Sebastian and reader and secretly dating and no one on the New Directions knows but then they get caught in Sebastian’s dorm room kissing?

Masterlist HERE

Wattpad HERE

Sebashtian X GenderNeutral!Reader

The idea that we should hate the warblers just because they’re our competition is ridiculous. Glee’s all about bringing music lovers together so we can make friends. Can't we all just be one?

What I really mean is cAN THEY JUST GET OVER IT SO I CAN KISS MY BOYFRIEND!?

I’d met Sebastian before I even knew he was a warbler. We went on a couple dates before it even came up. And when it did we didn’t mind that much. A little friendly competition. Plus doing duets with a boyfriend is actually a really cool way to spend a date.

When New Directions and the Warblers started feuding we agreed not to tell them despite the Warblers knowing.

Maybe it’s, because it's an all-boys school or them, aren’t as petty but theirs so much less drama. If we told the New Directions, they wouldn’t be happy. Hell, they might kick me out.

When I told Sebastian, he didn’t believe me…until I told him about Jesse. Sure, Jesse did turn out to be a bad guy, but Sebastian didn’t even know I was in glee when we met.

Glee club was normally fun but right now their all arguing over whether we should do something to the Warblers. Rachel wants to do a sing-off, Mr Shue wants to make peace, Finn wants to break some headlights, and Santana wants to break some kneecaps.

As their fighting, I take a back seat. And something somewhat relevant is that I'm texting Bash who’s also bored in practice. They need to practise a trio act for a local event, so he and some other warblers are able to have a break.

“What do you think (Y/N)?” I pause writing my message and look up to see Rachel standing with her hands on her hips “Shouldn't we show them what we're made of?”

Normally I’m a petty betty but not this time “Honestly I think you should chill. Getting worked up just shows them your scared their gonna win.” I shrug. My answers based in truth since Bash and I had been talking about it last night.

Everyone stared at me, wide-eyed “Who replaced you? Are you malfunctioning?” Kurt asked.

“I just can't be bothered wasting our time and effort when we could be practising.”

“(Y/N) is right,” Mr Shue cuts in “We should be practising. C’mon, everyone start to warm up. We practise in 5.”

I sigh and finish my text, telling Bash I had to go.

Y – Gotta go. Love you

S – love you too. Love your eyes and hair and perfect personality. Love everything about you especially the fact I can call you mine. Can't wait to see you after school

An involuntary smile spreads across my face. Everyone might think he's the devil but if anything, he’s an angel who fell but gets back up.

“What you smiling at?” I snap my head up to see Rory trying to look at my phone.

I quickly put it on standby so all he sees is a black screen. “Nothing.”

“OH, (Y/N) is texting a boy” He sang. This gathered some attention.

“You have a boyfriend?”

“Since when?”

“You talk to boys?”

“Who is it?”

I groan “I'm not talking to anyone.”

“Sure” Rory drags out his word “Then pray tell us why you were grinning like you found a pot of gold.”

I was silent for a moment “My mom made brownies.”

“Your mom can't bake,” Blaine points out “So who's the boy toy?”

“Have you lot got nothing better to do than talk about my lack of love life?” I cross my arms over my chest.

“Maybe practise?” Mr Shue suggests.

I'm grateful they're forced to drop the subject. But I'm even more grateful its last period and I can go see Seb after.

I watch the clock tick tick tick, and as soon as the second land hits 12 I grab my bag. Ring. I'm out the door the second it rings.

One of the warblers, John, has a car and was on a coffee run so said he could take me over to Dalton after school. I had to be quick though. For one, so I wasn’t rude, and two because his car didn’t exactly fit in.

It's no secret that Dalton students are well off. Especially since my ride drove a shiny black Range Rover. It contrasts the dented, banged up cars people from my school drive.

Jumping in the car I inhale the luxury car smell. “When I get my licence, you have got to hook a friend up,” I tell him.

He chuckles “You know my dad owns the dealership. Thiers a friends and family discount,”

I sigh a sigh of happiness as I lean back into the seat, fastening my belt. “Let's get out of here. It's bringing down the value of your car.”

“Trust me, I know.”

Honestly, since dating Seb, the warblers have become some of my closest friends. Like in uptown girl they actually are intrigued by how ‘normal’ people live. Last weekend some of us went to a normal café for lunch and some of them got confused since the food names were in English.

I only talk with the Warblers for around a minutes before Sebastian pulls me aside “Hey, you left your book in my dorm. Come to get it?” Which was code for ‘I want to be alone with you and you better start walking quick or I'm not responsible for my actions’.

Santana’s POV

That (Y/N) is a slippery one. During a short practise break, I walk over to Kurt, hair gel, and Mercedes. “Something's up with (Y/N) and I don’t like it.”

“Huh?”

I roll my eyes at Mercedes. “They're never off their phone, they practically sprint out of school, and when was the last time they hung out after school or at weekends?” I cross my arms.

They all only suddenly seem to realise “Your right. They are being strange.” Kurt says.

“Duh. That’s why I'm here.”

“Well, what are we meant to do? They're not gonna tell us.” Hair gel buts in.

I roll my eyes like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “We follow them.”

So, hair gel backed out. Something about morals or something. But Mercedes and Kurt were down. Like I thought they basically ran out of the room. We were hot on their tails.

But this got the attention of everyone's least favourite couple. “Where are you going?” Rachel and Finn ran to keep up with us.

I looked as they got into a nice ass car and sped off. “Hey, can we borrow your car.” It wasn’t really a question and I was already by his passenger door.

“Wha- “

“It’s an emergency,” Kurt told him.

We managed to convince him, but he and Berry decided to come. We managed to get 3 or 4 cars behind them, so we could still see them.

Then they turned into Dalton? Are they trying to steal (Y/N)? everyone shares a look and Finn turns in.

When we walk in I walk over to the first boy I see; a small skinny nerdy kid with thicker glasses than his skull “Hey, dork.” I walk over “You seen (Y/N). ‘Bout this tall- “I went to describe them, but he cut me off.

“Yeah, she went with Sebastian.” He answered almost instantly.

I looked back to everyone else with a confused look, matching theirs, “Where are they?”

(Y/N) POV

Times like these are the best. Its quiet, peaceful, and we don’t have to worry about time or someone walking in and seeing Seb’s tongue down my throat.

His dorm mate has gaming club till 6 so we have 2 and a half hours. Plus, in Dalton, they have a code. No, not the standard tie or sock over the door. Instead if there’s a school bag by the door they get the memo. Alone time. Or if you have a partner together time.

“You're beautiful,” Seb murmured against my lips.

“I love you.”

His thumb strokes over my cheek, almost touching my lip “I'm in awe of you. I didn’t realise you could love someone this much.” However, his mood seems to change slightly when he rolls us so he’s on top of me “Or that someone could be this hot.”

He kisses me harder than before, becoming more intense. His hands roam my body as mine tug on his hair, making him groan.

I know where this is going to lead, especially when I wrap my legs around his waist to pull him closer.

Its pure bliss until “What the fuck!” Our heads both snapped to the side to see 5 shocked looking New Directions standing in the doorway, holding the backpack.

Sebastian drops his head into the crook of my neck, murmur “Of fucking course.” While I lay there stunned.

Quickly I detach my legs and drop my hands. Sebastian looks up from my neck “Can you like leave? were in the middle of something.” I didn’t even know what to say.

“Yeah defiling our friend!” Kurt accuses.

Sebastian smirks “(Y/N) wasn’t complaining. Not even when I- “

“I don’t want to hear it!” Finn said, shaking his head.

I tap Sebastian's shoulder, making him look at me “Didn’t we talk about not telling them?”

“I think they’ve figured it out, babe.”

“Babe?!” Santana screeches.

Sensing this wasn’t going to be over quickly Sebastian sat up, letting me do the same. I smoothed down my hair, seeing Mercedes shake her head out the corner of my eyes. “I can't believe this. You're fraternizing with the enemy.”

“Keep your enemies close?” I try. They shake their heads. I sigh, sitting up properly. “Look, you guys don’t get a say in this. We met, not knowing that we were in glee clubs. We also, unlike you, aren’t afraid of a little competition. And we enjoy spending time with each without involving music. So, get over it.”

“What if you give away all out secrets?” Rachel asked in her high-pitched voice. “Then what?”

“Why would I do that? I want to wipe the floor with them.”

“Not a chance” Bash said.

I roll my eyes “Honey when we were singing Taylor Swift Love Story you were flatter than a 12-year-old girl. I have nothing to worry about.”

“At least we can dance.” He countered.

“Oh yes, how boyband chic” I roll my eyes. “Your just mad because you and the boys are going to have to pay up.”

“Pay up?” Mercedes asked.

I turned to them, having almost forgetting they were still their “Oh yeah we have a bet on. If the warblers win, I’ll have to clean every one of their bedrooms. But if we win- “

“-we all have to work for (Y/N) for a week. As PA’s, cooks, cleaners, or whatever their twisted hearts decides.”

Kurt shook his head “I still don’t approve. You’re just using (Y/N) to hurt them. You probably don’t even like them- “

“Don’t you ever say that again,” Sebastian stood up. I tried to grab his hand, but he moved. Apparently, when he brought me up to his dad he had highly discouraged the relationship and was now very defensive. “You don’t get it because your too wrapped up in your own problems. But I love (Y/N). I would rather quit the warblers than break up. Hell, I’d even start buying target clothes rather than breakup.”

I almost gasped. Sebastian's wardrobe was probably more expensive than all my possessions combined. Lucky bastard.

“Then do it. We’ll only ever approve if you quit Glee.” Santana glared at him, arms crossed.

He looked at me “Fine. I’ll text the warblers now.” He reached for his phone.

“No!” I grabbed it out of his hand “Your all being ridiculous. You don’t get a say in our relationship. And you're not quitting glee. You’ve been dancing since you were 3 and singing for years and I'm not going to be the person who gets in the way.”

“It’s the only way.” Santana stood strong.

Mercedes, Finn, and even Kurt seemed to be a little conflicted, but Rachel and Satan stood strong. “Fine,” I shrugged “I quit Glee. Good luck finding someone to learn my choreography in 2 weeks and getting a new member.”

Rachel and Santana looked at each other “Fine,” Rachel sighed “You can…do whatever this is,” she gestured at us with a disgusted look “But no spilling secrets!”

“Didn’t plan on it.” She nodded.

Santana walked over to shake on it. After Sebastian said, “Now can you all leave, we were in the middle of something.”

“Ew,” Santana said, holding her hands in the air with a shaking head as she left.

“Oh and put the bag back.”

“Why?”

“Teachers found out about the tie, not bags.”

“EW!”

#glee #glee imagine #glee preference #sebastian smythe #sebastian smythe imagine #grant gustin #grant gustin imagine

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unnaturalequilibrium · 6 years

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five fave Vanity scenes (for now)

#2) “Cheeky Mare”

I love this because I've never seen this before. It's domestic as heel, but a little cheeky. Fluff, wholesome and PG13, but plays at an intimacy that – I haven't really seen before. It is fanfic, I think, and I don't mean the kind that makes you blush from looking at a mango. No, it is soft and has a sexual undertone, but it doesn't come across as titillating or trying too hard. I'm trying to analyse why that is, because I can't seem to simply point at this one thing and go “this is why it's different”. But at the core of it I think it's about how it's not sold off the bat as something hot. It doesn't feel over-sexualised which as these things go seem to be the norm. Lets not pretend any mainstream show does affection between women without having the male gaze front and centre. It's not for us, it never was. So I'm trying to figure out why this feels like it is for me. Is it such a simple thing as a bias? I don't think so, because I can look at a lot of other things that I ship and recognise it for what it is, but still loving it. This though does feel like a fanfic. And if you generalise a bit the one thing that does differentiate a fanfic from canon is its audience. A fanfic, or at least the kind I read, have never felt like it was meant for anyone other than gay and bi women. It doesn't pretend to want to include a mainstream. It knows its audience and writes specifically for it, it writes romance and love in a shape that’s almost always excluded by a mainstream. And that's how this scene feels. I feel like I am at home, like it’s a kind or romance that can rush my heart, like I am the intended audience despite it existing in the middle of straight culture. I don't know. Does any of this make sense? Is it just me?

I'm not just in it for the feel though, because content of this scene is pretty spectacular to. Seeing the domestic side of these two make me happy. Honestly, sometimes all you need is for your ship to fret over their children and share sweet morning kisses while making toast. Especially when you've got other stuff to compare to, the progress from running out on someone in bed or walks of shames to now having breakfast together the next day and happily lingering in each other's presences, that's noticeable. Plus with dialogue where, Charity of all people, bring up the idea of “isn't that what you love about me?”. Like a month earlier this woman balked at and ran away at the potential of being Vanessa's girlfriend and now she's fishing for the l word?! I'm pretty sure that's what they refer to as both character and relationship development.

It's glorious, and that's before you even take into account Charity's subsequent chat with Noah, where she literally says that Vanessa is different. It's straight up canon, no loopholes. Vanessa is different to Charity's previous spouses and lovers. And I mean...like...where do you go from there? That's pretty much it. It's a soap so there are no forevers, there's no til death do us part that will not end in sudden death or cheating. The closest a soap will ever come to a happy ending is through a massage therapy/trafficking storyline. But that line of hers, the “Vanessa's different” sets this damn couple aside from the rest in a way that's...I just don't know what to do with it. But it's managed to paint these two into a corner from which it's going to be very hard for the writers to make whatever comes next feel relevant or real if/when they decide to move on.

Besides that, that line of Charity's though, it's also seriously depressing. Because the full extent of it is, “Vanessa's different – I trust her”. And let that stew in your mind and then have a good cry about Charity's love life. The fact that Vanessa is the first partner and lover whom she trusts is so fucking twisted and dark it gives me nightmares and chest pains. It’s makes my soul want to make like suicidal Humpty Dumpty and take a swan dive off the wall.

Personally I am also a huge fan of Noah not taking a liking to Vanessa and instead being actively rude towards her. To me that adds that perfect kind of drama and angst which I prefer, the kind that's external. The kind where the couple is solid and strong, you never doubt how they feel about each other, instead you have to watch them struggle and deal with external factors. It has an impact on how they have to behave, but it never has an impact on how they feel for one another. It's an obstacle to overcome as a couple and not a wedge between them. And that's the sign of good quality relationship drama. It's something that actually requires a bit of work from the writer, but ultimately when done with care will pack a serious wallop and make sure it's a story that will actually be imprinted in you as an OTP, in the old school meaning. The kind you fifteen years from now will still randomly remember when you zone out on the Monday morning commute, scaring the lady next to you as you mumble, “gaahhh, that was good!”.

Cherry on top though is the same shit that make all of their scenes work, details and chemistry. The chin on shoulder, the little self-conscious gestures they both do when they're “caught” kissing, Vanessa's little interrupted cheek cradle/caress when she checks her affection in front of Noah. The way it flows so effortless with intimacy and flirtatious affection. All those little things they breathe into it that make this fictional relationship come to life. It's a decidedly plump and juicy cherry on top.

All of that put together and this scene is truly spectacular, I still don't get that it's an actual real thing that exists, and not just something I read in a book or daydreamed up during an especially boring Thursday meeting.

#charity x vanessa #vanessa x charity #charity dingle #vanessa woodfield #vanity #emmerdale #five fave vanity #finally had some actual spare time to continue this

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lovewinsrepresentation · 6 years

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Southside School Stories

Southside Showcase Day 5: Southside High School

For one period out of everyday, the students from Southside High were required to take a course on Ethics; “Ethics” being a nice way to say that the students of Riverdale from the other side of the tracks have no morals and should be required to learn some in a Riverdale High classroom. To many, it seemed like the Northside was, once again, targeting them for not being lucky enough to be born into a family who can afford a home on the nicer side of the “Town with Pep”.

Like any other day, there was no teacher who monitored their behavior or gave out work. During seventh period, the classroom was only filled with students affiliated with the Serpents. This included the heir to the Serpent Leadership, Jughead Jones. As a side project to potentially save the Southside from Hiram Lodge’s SoDale project, Jughead had taken it upon himself to make a documentary about the students from the Southside. Everyday, he’d ask different students about certain landmarks that were relevant to the Southside: Twilight Drive In, The Whyte Wyrm, Crystal Lake, Fox Forest, and now... Southside High.

Jughead was setting up his camera when other students of the Ethics class began to enter; all seeming very curious about what he was up to now. He had specifically caught the attention of his closest Serpent friends: Sweet Pea, Fangs Fogarty, and Toni Topaz.

“What the hell are you up to now, Jones?” Sweet Pea, the largest and angriest member of his inner circle, asked as he sat in a desk across from the camera. “Another movie about some deep, dark conspiracy going on in Riverdale?”

Jughead rolled his eyes, but refrained from rudely commenting back. “If you must know, Sweet Pea, I AM making another film. About the Southside. Since you’re already positioned right in front of the camera, you might as well go first.”

Sweet Pea dramatically ran his fingers through his hair in a mockingly feminine manner. “Where is the makeup crew? I want to be camera-ready for my closeup, Director Jones.”

“Yeah yeah” Jughead started as he finally got the camera perfectly focused on Sweet Pea’s face. Before he started rolling, he wanted to make sure Sweet Pea would be one hundred percent serious for the sake of his documentary. “Can you please be serious? This is important.”

“Whatever Jones, just start rolling.”

With that small exchange handled, the camera started rolling and Sweet Pea’s interview began.

“Can I get your name for the record, please” Jughead asked.

“Sweet Pea.”

“It is safe to assume you grew up on the Southside of Riverdale, correct?”

Rather than answering the question immediately, Sweet Pea pulled down the white turtleneck under his Riverdale High School polo to reveal his Serpent tattoo. “Does that answer your question?”

Jughead, again, refused to comment. He wanted to keep the film as authentic as possible, which meant little to know editing. If he wanted to grill Sweet Pea for his behavior, it was going to have to be after their interview had concluded.

“Tell me about Southside High, Sweet Pea” Jughead said.

“Anything?”

He nodded behind the camera, “Anything you want.”

Sweet Pea grinned mischievously, leaning back in his chair with a newfound excitement for this seemingly mundane interview. “I could tell you all kinds of stories about the hellhole. Going there everyday was basically getting us ready for prison. Metal detectors and bag checks as you entered. Cops and dogs in every hall to find whatever drugs they assumed were moving through those hallways. The only thing that made it bearable was the Serpents. Most schools had cliques, we had gangs. It was a mess, but we made the best out of the little we had.”

“Can you tell me what the biggest difference is from being at Southside High to being at Riverdale High?”

Sweet Pea chuckled softly a little bit. Like he usually did before he made some sarcastic comment to undermine whatever statement had been said to him previously. “You really wanna know, Jones?”

He receieved a nod from Jughead. “Go ahead.”

In that moment, Jughead was able to seem something change on Sweet Pea’s face. His usual strong and brutish exterior seemed to almost melt right before his eyes and the camera. For the first time, Jughead had seen Sweet Pea look vulnerable. Innocent, even.

“At Riverdale, I can go to school safely with enough books for the entire class and functioning computers from this century.” He smiled slightly. “I can walk through graffiti free hallways. I can join actual clubs and organized sports.”

Sweet Pea paused and looked directly into Jughead’s eyes. “I like basketball, and I’m actually really good at it. I would’ve never known that if I would’ve been stuck at Southside High. For once, I go to a school where my teachers don’t sell drugs to the students and I don’t have to worry about being in a gang until after those bells ring. And you know what? I like that.”

Jughead couldn’t help but smile at the testimony he was receiving. It was honest and heartfelt; two words that generally aren’t associated with Sweet Pea or the Southsiders. He could use this to further prove the point that the Southside isn’t a stain in Riverdale that could be wiped clean. The Southside was full of people. People with families and stories to be told. Who went through normal things just like everybody else.

“Thank you, Sweet Pea. Can I ask you just one more question?”

“Fire away, Jones” Sweet Pea said back.

“Who do you think this change effects the most, on a personal level?”

Another genuine smile came to Sweet Pea’s face. “My family. My mother works three jobs and to support four kids: me, my two brothers, and our little sister. She didn’t want me to join the grow up a Serpent, but I joined to support our family like my father never had. For so many years, I’ve been the man in the house. Being here, I can just be a dumbass kid. I think she wants that for me. Especially so I can show the kids that there is a life for us beyond the tracks. It gives them hope and her some peace of mind.”

“Who would’ve known? This giant actually has a soft side.”

Sweet Pea just rolled his eyes, but couldn’t get the slight smile to leave his face. “You can’t get a name like Sweet Pea without having a heart somewhere. Just don’t make me look like a pussy in your documentary. I have a rep to uphold, Jones.”

With that said, Jughead turned off his camera. “Don’t worry about that, Sweet Pea.” He then turned his attention to Fangs, who had been watching the entire interview with earnest curiosity. “Tomorrow, I want you to tell me about Sunnyside Trailer Park. I want to know about your life there. How you met Toni and Sweet Pea. Deal?”

Fangs really had no idea what he was signing up for, but that didn’t stop him from taking up Jughead on his proposition. “No problem. On one condition, though.”

“What would that be?”

With a slight smirk, Fangs stated his condition. “Keller does my interview.”

“You got yourself a deal, Fogarty.”

#southsideshowcase #sweet pea #riverdale

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inacciaio-archive · 6 years

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a meta/is this a meta?/thing about semira/thing about how my brain works/dani headcanons 101

so I wanted to write a thing about how I come up with my headcanons, I wanted to show you guys my thought process, cause I know some people who read my headcanons are probably like

wtf is this girl on, these are some bullshit headcanons right here, what kind of mental gymnastics

and who knows, maybe none of you think that, or maybe there are one or two people who are just politely confused, who knows, here’s my explanation anyway

So basically I get a lot of my headcanons from a process that I use when getting a new muse; I gather a bunch of canon information and then see what I can get from that by asking a series of questions that usually have answers that lead to more questions and I try answering all the questions as best as I can and try linking them together to form a realistic, hopefully in-character headcanon.

For this example, I’m going to use Semira, who has definitely been at the center of this process the most because we don’t have much canon information about her. She was only in one Underworld film and isn’t the main character, so already I don’t have much to work with. However, to get one headcanon in particular, her backstory, I used these particular facts that we do know about Semira based on the canon given to us.

We know Semira was turned before Selene was turned, based on her conversation with Thomas; Semira: Of course, I despise her. She killed Viktor, I was his regent. Thomas: Until he met Selene. From this information, plus the information we know about Selene, we know that Semira is older than Selene and that she was turned sometime before 1402 when Selene was turned.

We know Semira had a close relationship to Viktor as her sire and she was fiercely loyal to him, even after he basically traded her in for a newer model (Selene)

We know Semira was Viktor’s regent and somehow Selene caused her to not be his regent sometime later, as shown by the specific phrasing Thomas used. Semira: I was his regent. Thomas: Until he met Selene. (and we know it was sometime later because we also know that Semira was sent on a mission for Viktor as his regent in the 90s)

We know that Semira was, during the 90′s, sent on Viktor’s behalf to find Amelia at the Nordic Coven. It was hinted that this was when Viktor truly abandoned her for Selene, as she was stated to have spent time living at the Nordic Coven afterwards, before moving to the Eastern Covern.

We know that at some point in an unknown time, she became a council member and the leader of the Eastern Coven. It was most likely sometime before the events of the first Underworld film, as it’s implied and almost outright stated in Blood Wars that Semira was one of the council members who signed Selene’s death warrant.

We know that Semira was incredibly distraught about Selene killing Viktor, and showed signs of not knowing his crimes, remaining loyal to him despite him replacing her with Selene, and Semira being unable to forgive Selene for killing him. It’s also extremely likely that the event of Selene killing Viktor was what sparked her revenge plan against Selene.

We know that Semira is a very cleanly person. (this may not seem relevant to her backstory headcanon but just trust me ok) Despite her often brutal fighting, she never really gets dirt, grime, or blood on her. There is only one instance of her ever not being clean, and that’s when blood spills down her front when she’s in a state of something almost feral, when she’s consuming Selene’s blood and reveling in her victory. Other than that, we see her perfectly pristine and clean for the entire movie, despite almost no one else remaining that way.

We know that Semira craves power.

SO, from those things, it’s time to ask some questions

Why Semira? Out of any other vampire in any other coven, why was specifically Semira Viktor’s regent? Maybe because of a certain similarity

like it’s no coincidence that these three look like they could be sisters. Viktor was obviously looking to replace his deceased daughter Sonja, wanting a second chance at having someone like a daughter and an heir who could be exactly what he wanted her to be. We’ve already seen that this was the case with Selene, it’s not a stretch to think he would’ve done it with Semira; she was likely the first Sonja replacement. Granted, Selene looks like Sonja a lot more than Semira does, which was probably why Viktor abandoned Semira in the first place. Maybe Viktor saw a human who kinda looked like Sonja and got attached, and decided he wanted her as a replacement, much in the same way he reacted when he saw Selene for the first time. In order for his plan to work, however, Semira would’ve had to been easily molded, vulnerable, lost, in the way Selene was after she had lost her family. Selene had no one anymore, which was why loyalty to Viktor had come easier than it would’ve had she had others in her life. So that brings up the question; what could’ve possibly made Semira as easily molded to be what Viktor wanted her to be?

Why was Semira so incredibly loyal to Viktor, despite him leaving her and basically casting her out? If she had others in her life, she could’ve leaned on them, but it’s my belief that, like Selene, she had no one else. It was part of what made her so easy to mold. Maybe, in fact, this is why Semira is more of a perfect image of what Viktor wanted her to be then Selene is. Selene wasn’t always alone, after all. When she was a human, she had her family who surely taught her morals. Morals, however, are something that Semira often seems to lack. So then, is it possible that Semira never had a family to instill such morals into her? Maybe this is why she is so deeply loyal to Viktor; he’s the closest thing to a loving relationship she’s ever had, and she didn’t have people before him that showed her what a good loving relationship looks like. Viktor was her first and only example. This brings up the question of what could’ve caused Semira to have never had anyone.

Why does Semira crave power so intensely? When people want power that much, it’s often because they lived a life that inspired them to want it. That kind of life, she could’ve been someone completely powerless, someone who was made to feel like she was worth absolutely nothing. Power would change that; power would make her important and would ensure that no one could ever make her feel like that again. It’s a common reason behind not only villains in fiction wanting power, but it’s a common reason for every day, real life people wanting power as well. So then what kind of situation Semira could have been in to have been completely powerless, a life where she felt like nothing, one she would ensure that she never return to, whatever the cost?

Finally, why does Semira seem to be obsessive with her appearance and lavish things and parties and cleanliness? Based on the other points and questions, it implies a life of poverty. When you live a life without much, and you suddenly have the world at your fingertips, it’s easy to get greedy and become addicted to the materialistic; as for cleanliness, if you lived a life where you were always dirty, and now you didn’t have to, you wouldn’t want to be reminded of it.

So finally, my conclusion; what I’ve gathered from this process. From this process, I have a headcanon that Semira lived a life on her own, one that was impoverished, filthy, and without guidance, which made her extremely susceptible to Viktor’s teachings and so she did her best to become what he wanted her to be, which was easy because she was practically a blank slate in terms of teachings and morals. Expanding on this headcanon, focusing on a few of the time periods that Semira could’ve grown up in (we don’t have her exact canonical age), it seems to me she could’ve been sold by her parents at an extremely young age, as was common when you couldn’t afford to care for a child. Perhaps she was sold to somewhere doing dirty manual labor, like working at a mill. I also headcanon that she ran away sometime in her youth, if only to get her to where she needed to be in order to meet Viktor as a human. He saw how naive and lost and alone she was, and he preyed on that in order to turn her into what he always wanted Sonja to be. And then when a seemingly better Sonja in the form of Selene came along, he tossed Semira aside. Even with that, Semira’s loyalty remained because she had no one else who had cared for her even a little, let alone someone who had cared for her the way Viktor did all of those years. However, now without Viktor to protect her, she needed to protect herself, and she did everything in her power to achieve such protection. She went from being a regent, a right hand man, to a council member and leader of an entire coven. Still, it wasn’t enough, so she decided she needed more power, in fact, she needed to be the most powerful. If she was the most powerful, that was how she could be happy and satisfied. If she couldn’t have Viktor, and she had nothing else, then she was sure that power would give her everything she needed. As for revenge, obviously she felt she needed closure. She needed to win for once, to be the better one for once. Stealing Viktor from her was one thing, she thought, but killing him was unforgivable, and so she felt the only way she could ever feel satisfied was Selene’s suffering, her death, and proving if not to Viktor then proving to herself that she was better than Selene. Even though she failed ultimately, she had succeeded in one thing, and that was gaining Selene’s power, and in that moment she had been too distracted to care about anything else, even the blood dripping down her dress. All that she was able to focus on was her success and the joy it brought her, because in that moment, for once, she felt like she wasn’t just the inferior one that Viktor tossed aside.

So yeah, this is how I come up with a lot of my headcanons. It’s not like this with all of my muses, but it is when I can get a decent portion of canon information about them, along with some unknown gaps that need filling in. Most of my headcanons that I have for Semira were made using this process of thinking.

#mun things #{ piece by piece the puzzle will fall into place } ; semira #About Semira

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alltingfinns · 6 years

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“The Last Jedi is new and fresh!”

This is one of the weirder pieces of praise for the film. Because this movie was honestly a way bigger retread than The Force Awakens, and everyone and their grandma seems to delight in referring to TFA as A New Hope 2.0. Meanwhile TLJ is basically The Empire Strikes Back but “edgier” and with pieces of Return of the Jedi thrown in haphazardly.

Breakdown under cut (spoilers obviously):

First there’s the overall plot structure.

- Starts with a battle. Only three SW movies begin with a battle rather than end with one, those are ESB, Revenge of the Sith and TLJ, and only ESB and TLJ have the battle during an evacuation.

- Our main heroes are separated. One hero seeks out an old master, and two others go to a beautiful city with dark secrets to seek help from a scoundrel who ends up betraying them. Before they decide to go to this city they spend time escaping from the dark forces with a sense of claustrophobic foreboding. They can only just remain out of the grasp of the dark forces, and their only hope is that the scoundrel can help them fully escape.

- The old master refuses to help at first. At one point a ghost from the past shows up to point out how this new pupil is better than the master realized. The pupil leaves the master against his protests to confront the villain, who pushes the pupil into an emotionally difficult realization about their parentage.

- The very last scene is a bittersweet moment focusing on the remaining heroes reunited with the rebel army (or what remains of it).

Then there’s the “new” characters. Say what you will about The Force Awakens, their new characters were mostly in fact new characters. Finn as a defecting stormtrooper was a particularly new and fresh idea. And Poe’s closest counterpart in the original trilogy would be an amalgamation of Wedge Antilles and Princess Leia, and maybe another character or so. Rey is admittedly pretty much The Skywalker, which is why her not being a Skywalker makes no goddamn sense, but I digress. The first order has a neonazi feel to it that echoes the original empire’s nazi Germany feel, which is a good way to combine old and new in a thematically relevant way. Having a Darth Vader wannabe fanboy as the villain follows in that vein. Snoke was the emperor 2.0 sure, but the mystery of where he came from and how he appeared to be older than the emperor himself was at least somewhat intriguing.

TLJ’s new characters on the other hand... One out of three is new, how refreshing!

I honestly can’t say much about Rose Tico, other than that she’s technically new in that we’ve never had a fangirl-type of character in Star Wars before. Not sure we needed one, or for the first major WOC to be that, but still new. Admiral Holdo and DJ (who I had to look up right now, because his impression was so fleeting I couldn’t recall his name) are not new, but rather trashy Mon Mothma and Lando Calrissian respectively.

Trash!Mon Mothma is a respected leader in the resistance, except we’re not given any real reason as to why, as her leadership is awful. Mon Mothma spoke openly about the plans and made sure everyone had their turn. In general the rebels had a transparency in their leadership, and ran it as the democracy they wished to restore. Trash!Mon Mothma was authoritarian and a bad tactician. Whether she was short- or longsighted was debatable, as she didn’t consider the possibilities of her “do as I say because i say it and for no other reason” type of leadership to lead to a mutiny. A soldier is honestly duty bound to mutiny when faced with incompetent leadership that risks the lives of an army without so much as a hint of possible gain from the venture.

Then there’s trash!Lando, or more accurately, nuclear-waste-dump!Lando. Where as original flavor Lando was charismatic and charming, nwd!Lando couldn’t charm a fly attracted to his smell. And yet we’re suppose to buy that Finn and Rose were ready to trust him, just because they couldn’t get a hold of their first choice? And where Lando was given more than enough motivation for his betrayal, nwd!Lando is basically trash for the lulz! And again, why didn’t they try to keep their communication with Poe away from him when he looked ready to sell them for a cheese sandwich? If your plot only works because you’ve made all the characters far more idiotic than they either were established as or could reasonably be considered to be based on their occupation or basic pattern detecting skills, you are a bad writer period.

What’s worse is that Rian even made the already new characters from TFA embarrassingly old. Many have already pointed out the latinx stereotype that Poe got turned into, as well as an obvious reprise of Han Solo at his most “all about me” point of his life. Which makes no sense if you watched, oh say, the first couple of scenes in TFA. Finn had to repeat his previous character journey only more clumsily. And then Luke Skywalker was made into Yoda 2.0, when the Legends verse already showed that you can write him as his own type of teacher different from the ones who taught him, but still the same wide-eyed farmboy with added wisdom of his years.

But please tell me how this is all new and fresh, because a lot more died and the Vader fanboy got added focus.

#anti tlj #tlj criticism #tlj negativity #anti rian johnson #anti the last jedi #star wars

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imyourliquor-youremypoison · 7 years

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Divided We Fall (OUAT - Peter Pan x Reader) Part 6

Requested by @ajakral

Synopsis: Who said there were no girls on Neverland? Who said Peter Pan ruled over this world on his own? On the other side of the island, far from the mermaid lagoon, the echo cave and the skull rock – that’s where (Y/N) and her girls lived. Because behind every great man there is an even greater woman, what would the king be without his queen?

A/N: Doesn’t star any OUAT characters apart from Pan, Felix and Wendy.

Word count: 3.3k

Part 5 <<< >>>> Part 7

MASTERLIST

“Pan,” one of the Lost Boys called him – he didn't remember his name but he was one of the oldest. “Felix left the camp hours ago to find you but he hasn't returned yet,” he informed his leader, somewhat hesitantly, as if he was scared to be punished for Felix's absence even though he had nothing to do with it.

Ah right, Felix, Pan almost had almost forgotten about him. He was still trapped in tree Pan put him into. With a quick wave of the hand Pan released his hold on the magical tree, leaving it to Felix to get out all by himself.

“He'll come back soon enough,” Pan told the Lost Boy and dismissed him. The boy stayed where he was, looking awkward and unsure of what to say what he obvious came to tell him. “Spit it out boy, I don't have all night.”

“It's the Shadow, it brought new people,” he admitted, shaking slightly when Pan walked up to him, standing too close for the young boy's nerves.

“What people? Do you mean the Shadow brought more than one boy?” Peter asked, growing impatient with the boy and his slowness in providing a clear explanation.

What in heaven could be so out of the ordinary and important that Pan couldn't even take a few hours off and be by himself? What prompted his second in command to seek him out in the forest, knowing that he would be punished for it? He was tired of being surrounded by a bunch of helpless, incompetent boys. Y/N. He couldn't stop thinking about Y/N whenever someone disappointed him, because he knew that he wouldn't have to worry about these kinds of the things if she were still around. Unfortunately for him that was out of the question. He had come to terms with the fact that she would never come back to him after the first six decades of her throwing away his flowers. Which raised the question of why he kept sending them to her. He pushed it to the back of his mind and focused on the task at hand.

“You should come see for yourself,” the boy stuttered out, only then realizing he had almost given a direct order to his leader.

To avoid losing anymore time Pan ignored the boy's tongue slip and followed him outside of his shack. He led him to the cages to his surprise.

“Why would you imprison the newcomers? Who's responsible for that?” Pan barked at the boy on his way there, taking great pleasure in seeing fear appear on his juvenile features.

They all shared looks and remained quiet. Pan guessed it must have been Felix, none of them were confident enough to take decisions without consulting Pan first. Peter understood why they were in cages as soon as he saw them though.

Cursing under his breath, Pan ran a hand through his hair and kicked one of the nearby empty cages out of frustration. How long had it been since the Shadow brought those people here? How dumb was Felix for not coming right away and tell him? How dumb was he for not listening to his friend when he told him something was wrong?

“Everybody leave,” Peter said calmly but sternly. “Now!” He shouted when he realized his Lost Boys stared at him with googly eyes instead of obeying.

They dashed away, returning to their previous activities as if nothing was going on while Pan walked closer to the cages and knelt down to be at eye level with his visitors.

“Names,” Pan snapped at them and they yelped and shivered under his somber gaze. Something dark twinkled in his eyes and they must have seen it because they answered right away.

“John,” the first one said.

“Michael,” the other one told him, holding onto his brother.

“We're the Darlings, where are we? Where are our parents? Why did you take us?” The third one began to ask question after question, gripping the bars of the cage with her shaking hands. Pan's attention shifted to the furious eyes staring at him with contempt.

“Hello there,” he said and everyone shivered in fear. “What are you lovely doing here? Surely the Shadow made a mistake, girls don't belong here.”

“I don't know what you mean, I belong with my family!” She replied stubbornly, refusing to look away from Peter's inquisitive eyes. “Release us! Our parents will worry if we don't go back home!”

“I don't see how this is relevant to me,” Peter snarled. “The grow ups' concerns are the least of mine.”

“What do you want from us?” She asked, her voice beginning to quiver though there was determination in her sparkling eyes.

She was the oldest, that much was obvious to Peter. For a second he thought that she reminded him of Y/N but he saw the fire in her eyes diminish by the second. It wouldn't be long before she completely subdued and stopped resisting Peter's threats and intimidation techniques.

Y/N would never. She never has, in all the years he kept her close and tested her limits. But her flame only grew in intensity the more time she spent with him. He shook the thought away.

“I want nothing to do with you, silly little girl,” Peter laughed in disdain, making her flinch and back away a little. “I have no use for you. Your brothers will stay with me, you can go back to your home and your parents you care so much about.”

Peter was taken aback by the vehement protesting that came from the cage next to the girl's when the threatened to separate the siblings. The Lost Boys have had the good idea to lock the girl in another cage so she wasn't with her brothers. John and Michael shook the bars of the cage and shouted all kinds of protests upon hearing that Peter projected to keep them prisoner here.

“Why do you want my brothers? What have we done to you?” The girl wailed. Her defined brown curls bounced with every movement of her head, and the ribbon holding her hair back started to loosen up. She liked like a doll. Fragile. Breakable.

“I need little soldiers for my army and you don't make the cut, nothing personal here, you are simply useless to me.”

“We will never be your soldiers!” The oldest boy told him, displaying more assertiveness in this one daring sentence than his sister had during their entire exchange.

“You can't separate us! We'll never obey you!! Leave us alone!” The other one added, making Peter smirk at how feisty they all were. He had noticed over the years that the children tended to be bolder when they weren't alone. One more reason to separate them – divide to conquer.

Peter opened his palm and made a dagger appear there, causing the younger brother to gasp in amazement while his two siblings trembled in fear. Before any one of them had a chance to say something, Peter opened the girl' cage in a snap of his fingers and dragged her out, only to hold the weapon up to her throat, earning a round of cries from the three children.

“What if I don't leave you a choice?” He asked the two boys. “Maybe I won't send her home, maybe I'd rather slit her throat, less work and more fun for me this way.”

“Monster!” She cried out.

“No, no, please! Wendy did nothing wrong!” John started crying silently.

Pan could feel the girl - Wendy, what a lovely name – shake in his arms as he held her tight so she would escape from his grasp.

“Let me go!” She tried to say between two sobs. “Please!”

Y/N never begs.

“We'll do what you say, just please don't hurt her!” Michael promised, still holding his brother close.

Y/N never gives in.

“Quiet!” He barked at them, prompting a collective whimper followed by silence. The arm he placed around Wendy's shoulders to keep her pressed to his chest felt wet and he realized heavy tears fell from her eyes.

Y/N never cries like a helpless little thing when he showed her the rough side of the hand. She took it as a challenge and doubled her efforts to exceed his expectations.

But Y/N hated him and this pathetic, whimpering little thing crying in his arms was the closest thing to his Y/N he would get. His hand fell down his side and Wendy took this opportunity to dive down and return to her cage, trying to reach out to her brothers through the bars.

Pan vanished, leaving the Darlings to their moment. What was worth his immortal life without Y/N? Even worse, knowing that she hated him?

Her throat was sore and her eyes dry – Y/N wasn't much of a crier, but this time she felt it was justified. She had undergone quite an amount of physical torture ever since she got here, whether it be from Peter and the Lost Boys, or from their enemies, but it had only served to toughen her up, nothing she couldn't take. What Peter did to her with his ceaseless attempts to draw her back to him was a whole other level of cruelty. He aimed where it hurt, and she hated him for doing this to her, but most of all she hated him for having such power over her.

She knew the girls were doing all right so she didn't return to camp yet. Not taking the risk of her girls seeing the tears in her eyes. Y/N got lost in the forest – figuratively that is, she could not get lost even if she walked through the heavy jungle blindfolded. Hundreds years of exploring Neverland had done this to her.

Luckily for her the Lost Boys' camp was at a three days journey so she could wander about aimlessly without any danger of bumping into anyone – after the last few hours of turmoil, who knew what kind of hectic state the boys were in? Peter's foul mood never allowed any room for leisure, he had everyone work tirelessly until they were too exhausted to even speak.

Sometimes she wondered if she was really that different from him. Their methods weren't quite the same but in the end they were feared by their peers more than they were respected. Y/N wouldn't bat an eyelash if one day her girls decided to rebel – no doubt being led by Sybil who will soon grow fed up with being constantly reprimanded and assigned on night watch.

Peter Pan had broken her in a way that could not be healed by any magic. Over the first hundred years she spent on the island, she thought he tried to break her spirit to make her malleable, easier to control, even at the risk of diminishing her abilities. But she was wrong. Instead, she gave him her trust, she put her life in his hands, wrongly thinking that he cared about her and wouldn't mishandle it.

No use in saying that she was proven wrong in the harshest manner. The memory stung like a dart to her heart. As she stumbled around, barely looking where she was going, Y/N swallowed back a new set of tears, feeling the gigantic knot in her throat swell even more. Betrayal tasted like copper and rusted iron.

If it weren't for the muffled noised she heard right then, Y/N might have continued to walk farther and farther. Now that she thought of it, she might not be as far as she thought from the Lost Boys' camp since she used magic get away from the field of flowers.

“Who is there?” She asked, her voice sounding exhausted, the weight of her five hundred years of existence heavy on her shoulders this particular day. “I'm not here to play cat and mouse, show yourself or get away from me!”

The noise ceased for a minute before resuming even louder than the first time. She could not see anything around her yet the noise, as stifled as it sounded, came from somewhere close, very close. Finally, Y/N walked past one peculiar looking tree and that was when she figured it out. The noise came from inside the tree, as if something was trying to come out of it.

With a single sharp movement of her hand Y/N destroyed the tree's bark to reveal whatever was inside and trying to escape. She had to take a few steps back when a tall blond boy in poor condition fell out of the tree, collapsing on the ground, breathing heavily.

“Felix.”

Y/N heard her voice say his name without fully realizing she was the one articulating it. How long had it been since she last saw his scarred face? She remembered the first time her girls meddled with the Lost Boys and she saw Felix's disfigured face, swollen and red from the fresh wound that barred his face. He never told her where it came from but Y/N had her own theory.

He was coughing and struggling to catch his breath. Still on all fours on the ground, he looked like he came straight out of a nightmare.

“I don't need to ask who put you in that tree, or why,” she snickered, sounding a lot more bitter than she would have liked.

She herself must look quite different from the last time they met. She knew she was thinner in the face, paler, not like someone who hadn't had a sunbath in a long time , but like someone who lived in the shadows and whose life has been deserted by light and happiness. Y/N was the ghost of herself and she blamed Pan for this. As much as she wanted to take her life into her own hands and move on from what Peter did to her, she could not. It was too hard.

“Y/N, what a pleasure,” Felix commented ironically as soon as he recovered his voice. She had almost forgotten how disdainful he sounded. “As a matter of a fact Pan put me in a tree because of you.”

She didn't see that coming, however Felix saw her fist coming towards his face and he did nothing to stop her from hitting him. He knew better. If Y/N didn't get her way, she would try another. If he didn't let her vent with her fists, she would use magic against him – Pan rubbed off on her more than she would like to admit, there was nothing new here, Felix came to this conclusion in the early days when Y/N and Pan were still on the same side.

“He still cannot bear the mention of your name,” Felix taunted her, deliberately pushing Y/N's buttons. “I wonder if it's the same for you...”

He reached out to touch her but she swatted his hand away. He was trying to make her mad, make her lose her cool. He was very good at being an annoying bastard, always had.

“Peter's name has no place being mentioned in my camp, unless I feel the need to remind the Lost Girls how much of a menace he is. Yours on the other hand comes up quite often, when Sybil and her friends tell the others how they kicked your ass again and again – it makes a good campfire story.”

“Don't-”

Y/N's hand flew up and silenced Felix.

“I will not suffer to listen to your whining any longer. If you want to use my name as an excuse to infuriate Pan, do as you please, I don't care.” By now she had dropped the act and merely glared his way with her dead, shallow eyes. “But I am no longer the same as when we met, Felix. If you defy me, I will not hesitate as I did in the old times. And remember... I can put you back in a tree just as easily as I freed you.”

Before he could process what she just told him and utter another provocative sentence, Y/N turned around and grabbed a branch, ripping it off a tree. The piece of wood transformed in her hand, taking a slightly pointier shape, the tip forming an arrow.

“My greetings to Pan. Tell him I got his message and that there's a forest fire in the meadow.”

Using all of her strength, Y/N threw it at Felix whose hands flew up to protect his face. He closed his eyes and felt himself hitting the tree behind him. The arrow hit his collar and pinned him to the tree.

When he opened his eyes, he was not in the forest anymore. Instead he found himself pinning against the tree holding Pan's shack, in the middle of the camp, surrounded by wide-eyed Lost Boys staring in shock.

“Try this,” Peter instructed, showing her the gesture again and before Y/N's eyes he changed the wooden stick he held in his hand in a real steel sword, sharp enough to cut a man in half. He changed in back so Y/N could try.

“I have been trying to change little pieces of wood in all kinds of object for weeks, and all I managed to do is set fire to one of them. What makes you think I have a chance with an entire sword?”

“This is different,” he told her, walking around her like he always did when he was in a philosophizing mood. “It's not just any object, it's a weapon. It's one of the first and only things the Lost Boys can turn, do you know why?”

Y/N shook her head – obviously she did not know, Peter only asked for rhetorical effect.

“Because it requires very basic emotions – fear, anger, a strong desire to survive. It's easy, you'll see,” he promised, wrapping an arm around Y/N and holding onto the stick, guiding her movements. “No one here feels things as profoundly as you do. You're angry, I can feel it. Use that, canalize it, let it flow out of you in form of magic.”

“The whole point of anger is to be out of one's control, it just comes out, I can't make it happen,” Y/N argued, shaking off Pan's touch. “How do you do it?”

“Me?” He asked, a bit stunned that she would even ask him that question. They didn't play in the same league, they couldn't compare methods. “I do it like I breathe, my dear. It comes naturally.”

“Quit being arrogant and cocky, I'm asking for advice here so don't make me regret it,” Y/N scoffed, all the while focusing on her bloody stick. It wavered, as if the light played tricks on her minds, distorting reality. But it stayed the same.

“I just wish for it to happen and it does. I don't need to think about it, it just happens. Almost as if it knew what I wanted before me,” Pan eventually admitted, reluctantly giving her this personal piece of information.

“This doesn't help!” Y/N complained, lowering her stick. “It's stupid, just admit that you were wrong!”

“Peter Pan does not mak-”

“Don't give me another of your dumb sayings that begin with 'Peter Pan does not', or else you'll have to worry about how much damage I can do with just a wood stick, trust me I don't need a sword to beat your sorry ass!” She threatened.

“My, my, little tiger has claws!” Peter laughed. “What has gotten into you? Are you giving up already? Poor, helpless Y/N can't do a simple magic trick so she throws a fit?” He took a step towards her, expected her to cower away from him but she stood firm on her ground.

“I see what you're trying to do,” she said with a triumphant grin. “You want to make me mad, you think I'm not angry enough to turn this into a damn sword.”

“You see right through me, dear.”

“The anger is not the issue, I have plenty. The problem is that I don't see the point. I don't need the sword right now,” she explained. “When the Lost Boys morph a stick into a blade it's because they are fighting, they wouldn't be able to do it if you asked them to do it out of the blue.”

“Perhaps,” Peter conceded. “But you are not a Lost Boy, you are my precious Y/N. I don't make mistakes, you do have the gift of magic.” He smirked, once again displaying the twisted, sick smile that was his signature, the very smile that had made Y/N shiver in her blouse the night they first met in the Enchanted Forest. The devious Pied Piper smile that betrayed his ill intentions towards the transfixed children. He leaned in towards her, his mouth so close her Y/N's ear that she could feel his warm breath brush her cheek – triggering shivers again, but of another nature. “You're just too scared to use it.”

And with that, Pan vanished, leaving Y/N in a part of the island she did not know. He did that sometimes when she did not do good enough during their training sessions,he left her someplace she didn't know and she had to navigate her way back to camp, no matter how long it took her. This time her felt fury curse through her veins, rising up inside her like steam.

She could still see Peter's green eyes, his crooked smile teasing her, provoking her. Y/N, as aware as she was of the fact that he toyed with her, couldn't repress the feeling in her stomach, a distinctly different feeling from the one she had when the other boys teased her. She hated it. She despised it. She was frustrated with herself and needed to bash something in to vent before heading back to camp – wherever the hell it was.

In a fit of sheer rage, Y/N threw the stick to the tree in front of her with a scream of fury. To her utter bewilderment an ax, and not a stick, was buried in the bark of the tree. And somewhere in the distance she heard a faint laughter.

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akocomyk · 6 years

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My 2017 Crisis

No. That’s not mid-life crisis. I’m not even halfway there yet.

Ever heard of the term Quarter-life Crisis? That’s what I’m talking about. My friend, Wiki, describes it as a period of life, ranging from twenties to thirties, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult.

#Adulting is difficult. And really, this was the point where I really don’t know what to do with my life.

Anyhow. This is...

My Annual Blog for the 10 Most Memorable Moments of the Year

This is the fifth year (hooray for the achievement!) of me doing this blog. The first time I did this was for the year 2013.

2017 was a very boring year for me. There were only 13 memories in contention for the top ten, and I just felt indifferent for every single one of them. Remember last year? I had 17 memories then, and it was so difficult for me to determine which ones should get in and shouldn’t. I wanted every single memory to be in the top ten, and I didn’t even know how to rank them. This year? Every memory was dispensable. Like I didn’t really care if this one gets in or that one does not. The grading system I made last year was practically useless. I wished I could just not write this blog this year, but it would be a regretful shame for me.

Here goes the sh*t.

(I also used a rating system for this but I don’t think it’s relevant for this year anymore since I practically rearranged them consciously the way wanted them anyway)

My First Blood Donation (July 21)

Knowing the tons qualifications needed for a person to donate blood, I was actually surprised that I’m healthy enough—and safe enough—to donate my blood. A huge part of it was attributed to my being single since birth (check out the the qualifications to know why).

This is a unique achievement for me, even if I know that a lot of people have already done this. What made it more special to me was the fact that I’ve done this while my panic attacks were at its peak (more about that as you move further along with this list). Also, I personally think that those attacks was the reason why my bag was filled more quickly than it should, meaning I lost blood more quickly than I should, resulting to me going pale and dizzy for good long number of minutes.

Anyway, they did tell me it’s normal for first-time donors.

Everwing (July 1 until I grew tired of it)

This was the first time in a loooooong time that I was so addicted and dedicated into playing a game. It started when a close friend of mine, Marjette, invited our group chat to the game. People from LBC were playing it for quite some time and that’s why I was familiar with it, but I never got an invite from them.

When I finally got the hang of it, it was the only thing I kept on doing all the time. I wake up, and play the game. I go to work, eat breakfast at 7-Eleven so that I can use their free Wi-Fi, and play the game. At lunch, I drink coffee at Bo’s so that I can use their free Wi-Fi, and then play the game. And every night, I’m always excited to go home so that I can finally play the game at ease in my own home, using my own Wi-Fi.

Other than my relentless addiction to it for a month or so, it provided a means for me to do something with my closest friends even if we’re far from each other—thank you Boss Raids. Also, I also found my short term coffee buddies, Kai and Madam Cherry, who happen to be usual customers of Bo’s as well. It’s because of them that I was able to have sweet, unforgettable moments in my last days with LBC.

Cebu Trip (August 25-28)This wasn’t the best trip I’ve ever had, but it’s still a first, so it’s memorable, and it’s not everyday that you go to Cebu—not unless you’re from Cebu.

It’s not the best because I got so used to traveling in some place far from home and then do something there like an event or a contest and such. I went to Cebu with my sister just to become a tourist. And becoming simply a tourist, apparently, bores me. I was so used to hectic schedules and busy nights and tensed idle time as you pray that you win something during the awarding ceremony.

We did a lot of things there, of course. It’s Cebu. You had to be an awful couch potato if you ran out of things to do. We ate at this restaurant whose best seller was the lechon of Cebu. We went to the Ayala Malls. We rode the edge coaster. I bought a ukulele in Alegre guitars. We went to Mövenpick Resort and that was my first time ever to step on a white sand beach. We went to Sirao Flower Garden, Tops Lookout, and the Temple of Lea.

I didn’t really know what it is, but there was something about this memory that I missed and made me feel very nostalgic once we got back to Cavite.

The Global Movers Awards (GMA) & Toruk (June 30, May 28)

“The belongingness you seek is not behind you—it is ahead,” a line fro Maz Kanata from Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

Sometimes it surprises me how Star Wars can get so philosophical at times—and how it hits you right in the head.

Little info about the two:

GMA: This is LBC’s annual recognition program for the company’s best teams.

Toruk: A show by Cirque du Soleil that played in the Mall of Asia Arena wherein LBC was given free tickets so that the employees can go and watch the show.

How does Maz’s quote fit into all this? Well… one of the reasons why I resigned from LBC was that I yearned to belong on a certain group of people. Little did I know, there were other people outside the box that I contained myself into who were willing to welcome me with open arms. Sadly, it was already too late for me before I realized this.

The most memorable part of the GMA wasn’t Okada, Solaire, or the effin’ fountain show. It’s when during the after party, someone asked me—forced me, actually—to eat with them. There was still a lot of food in the buffet table, so they handed me a plate and put anything they wanted to put there for me. I got to hang out with them afterwards, and it was the first time ever since the day and the event started that someone asked me to eat with them.

Each department were given a set of tickets for the Toruk show. For ours, it became first-to-email, first-to-get. I didn’t want to compete with that. I was out of the office half of the day when that was announced. When I came back, everyone was talking about it. They announced who got the free tickets by the end of the day.

I didn’t feel bad that I didn’t get a ticket—I didn’t join, duh! I felt because no one asked me if I joined their mini raffle.

Fast forward to June 30. The Toruk show was still playing and it turns out, every department had a different showing date that they were assigned to attend to. On my way home, two people from a different department got on the same jeepney that I did. One of them had extra tickets to the show. She gave me two, insisting that I should immediately ask someone else to join me.

Everyone I was close to was either already on their way home or had plans for the night, so I unavoidably went there on my own. Eventually, I got to see the show with the most unexpected people.

Covers and Tumblr (February 22, March 30)

I’ve always had this fear of posting stuff on social media. There was a point back then when the only things I posted on Facebook were my reading progress updates in Goodreads, and occasional photos that are of significance to more than just me.

Then, there was a bunch of people who wanted me to post my song covers. I didn’t want to because I believe I wasn’t good enough and that I would eventually be bashed and badly criticised by people (because that’s how I’m like when a Facebook friend posts a cover and then it’s not that good).

But there’s this one person who forced—or, more likely, strongly encouraged—me to publicize a video that I recorded for her. I heeded her request… and the results weren’t as I feared (thankfully). No one bashed me straight at my face, but I did get a few compliments. I don’t know exactly why, but they were one of the most heartwarming words I’ve ever received, even if they’re said to me digitally.

Now the Tumblr part… I posted a blog about that explaining why I connected my Tumblr account with my Facebook account. Just to give you the gist of it, I connected it because I wanted to pay more attention to the quality of my writings and my posts because during that time, my posts were certainly dwindling down.

It turns out, no one pays much attention with my posts not unless it’s an image accompanied with my usual caption. Albeit there was one person who noticed that I was blogging, I really didn’t care much. I know there are more people who notices that I’m sharing my Tumblr posts on Facebook. Like I said before, I did that for me, not for everyone else.

The Gateway Reunion (December 8)

I stand by what I’ve realized before. The most memorable moments in our life are the ones that we never planned out.

Granted, this was planned a bit, but it wasn’t something that we expected doing.

Angge, the pub’s current Editor-in-Chief, wanted to give a surprise to Sir Geon for his tenth anniversary as the pub’s adviser. Initially, she just wanted to have all the past EIC’s record a video message for him, but it ended up into wanting every past member to include in the surprise, and also having a short meet-up at Starbucks - S Maison so that we’d all be in the same venue.

Anyway… It felt so nice to be able to bond with them again. They were those people who made my college life more than what ordinary students experience. They were those people who would accept you no matter how weird you are, unlike some of my classmates who were probably saying bad things about me when I turn my back around.

Honestly speaking, I wanted that meet-up to push through so that I’d be able to hang out with them just like we used to, not because I sooooo desperately wanted to record a video for Sir Geon—though I still gave my best on the video message for him.

This was one of those times when I wished that the night didn’t have to end. When I’m with them, I didn’t have to pretend to be anyone else other than me. No fakes. No masks. Just simply me.

Christmas of 2017 (December)

This memory is a surprise entry in this list. I added it when I was already writing the draft for the blog. I just realized that it deserved a place on this list when I was trying to learn the song “Emmanuel” on the guitar. A surge of nostalgia from the past weeks just engulfed me when I started singing along as I play.

The past Christmas season was not the most unforgettable or most enjoyable that I had in my entire life. I said season because I want to remember everything that had anything to do with 2017’s holiday celebrations.

First of all, months back, I didn’t think I’d be able to celebrate Christmas as good as I used to since I don’t have a regular job yet, but I was able to pull through—great thanks to Lamudi for hiring me as a freelance graphic artist.

I know that it only happened less than a month when I was writing this, but there are already things that I feel sentimental about, namely: Lamudi Christmas Party, Christmas Shopping, Christmas Eve Breakfast at Wilma’s, Dudi & Sha visiting me, and spending almost the entirety of Christmas on my own.

It sounds kinda sad—celebrating Christmas alone—but if you really know me, this isn’t as depressing for me as anyone thinks it is. I find solace whenever I’m alone, and I’m that kind of person who can think of things to make me happy even when I’m alone.

Also, the greatest memory I have for the past Christmas season is that I was able to complete attend all the eucharistic celebrations related to Christ’s birth—they are all sundays of advent, all nine mornings of Misa de Gallo, the Midnight Mass, Christmas Mass, New Year’s Eve mass, and the First Mass of 2018—and even the feast of the Epiphany.

I haven’t done this ever since my mother and I were active church members of the IFI – San Antonio.

Independence from LBC (September 1)

Admittedly, resigning from LBC wasn’t the best decision I’ve ever made in my entire life—especially if you’d consider the practicality of the situation. But… who here doesn’t know that I don’t give much f*ck about practicality?

My resignation was one thing that I’ve always wanted to do ever since I realized that I no longer have a place in LBC. Having gone that far, eight months after my first attempt, I could say that it’s long been overdue. I’d been ranting about this kind of stuff for quite some time already and it’s one of the reasons why—other than my emotional drama about life brought up by the death of my mother—the quality of my blog posts faulterred.

Freedom and relief. That’s what I felt when I started my days as an official, unemployed Filipino. There’s anxiety, I know. There’s the unknown. But I both fear and enjoy the unknown.

Cardiac Arrhythmia or Anxiety? (July-August)

At the night of July 9, I felt my heart beating a little harder and faster than it normally should. I dismissed it as something that I thought would be a side effect of drinking too much coffee ‘coz I had a hard time sleeping as well and I felt as if I was palpitating.

The troubling fact about this wais that the last time I drank coffee was more than two days ago. I still dismissed it and thought that everything would be normal the next day.

Boy, was I wrong. It lasted more than a day, even more than a week. And it wasn’t happening just before I sleep. It happened when i’m just sitting, when I’m eating, when I’m not doing anything, and when I’m doing any physical activity—like walk for two meters or just simply stand from my chair.

After consulting my soon-to-be-a-doctor bestfriend, I had myself checked up—at the Divine Grace Medical Center (DGMC), my physician was Dr. Jeremy Lu. He had me do several exams to check whatever it is that could be wrong with my heart. He had me do some blood chems, 2D echo, treadmill test, and, supposedly, the 24-hour doppler test. I was already done with the ECG. I had to do all these tests just to determine if I either have cardiac arrhythmia, some other cardiac disease, thyroid problems, or if everything I’m experiencing is just the normal thumping of my heart brought up by stress or anxiety.

I was able to do all the tests except for the doppler test, as previously mentioned. My healthcare insurance provider didn’t approve it without finding out the results of the 2D echo and the treadmill test. So the people from the hospital thought it best if I’d just go to a follow up checkup.

Eventually, the test results showed nothing was wrong with me—at least on the matters of the physical heart. Everything’s just anxiety and panic attacks.

And I do think that those results weren’t erroneous… and that I was perfectly healthy and normal. An individual of my age, my eating habits, my lifestyle... having a heart disease is the least of my concern. Even the nurses in the DGMC’s heart station were surprised I was their patient, with them saying that I’m too young to be there—compared to their usual patients.

It’s just anxiety, maybe even the mildest form. Who wouldn’t have an ounce of anxiety if you wouldn’t know what would happen to you after making a great life decision?

I’m all good now, if you’re wondering. But I somehow missed going to the hospital, and the people there, and going to Robinsons–Gen. Trias because that’s where we—Joanne and the parents of my sister’s boyfriend who voluntarily accompanied me to the hospital—head to right after.

My Unemployed Days (September 1–November 15)

Who knew? Who knew that this piece of sh*t of a memory would top this year’s list? Who knew that the most uneventful and unexciting moment of my 2017 would be the most memorable?

When I started my freelance work at Lamudi on November 16, there was one thing that I missed the most: DOING NOTHING. I meant essentially nothing. I missed cooking lunch for me and my sister. I missed sleeping all day. I missed wondering what to eat throughout the day. I missed thinking of what new things to post on my blog.

Other things that were part of this two-and-a-half-month-long memory were my countless applications and interviews in different companies, my cleaning and rearrangement of my house, binge watching on Netflix, watching movies, and… just endless daydreaming and hoping.

All of us know the clichéd saying, “Everything happens for a reason,” and wherever we are and whatever we do in a certain part of our life, there’s a purpose for it. One of the greatest things I learned from this memory is that life can still be enjoyable even if it is very simple, even if you don’t possess the largest amount of money in the world.

Life feels good when you live it without all the corporate stress and the extravagance of a modern day millennial. Life is better when you try to live day by day just thinking how to go through it, hoping that you’d still be alive tomorrow. Just show a little bit of appreciation to the the small things that we have.

Facebook asked a question to me, “If I could go back to the past in a certain time and place, it would be…” and I answered on the time when money didn’t exist, where I can live a simple life. Imagine, if all the things in this world didn’t have any monetary value and that if we have a home and we just cultivated whatever we have that surrounds us, we can still live and be civilized. Modernization and technology is truly two-faced.

That’s it.

It’s pretty boring, huh? Can’t blame it. I suppose you can’t always have a very eventful life every year.

Thanks for reading! The other three memories considered for this list were Watching 13 Reasons Why, Palarong LBC 2017, and Good Times Session with HS Loves.

#top10memories

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sometipsygnostalgic · 7 years

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JUST FINISHED GRAVITY FALLS

weirdmageddon was amazing! FAR better than most finales tend to be.

i wanted to know what the zodiac thing was all about though... i’d never seen it before but it was obviously important to the fans who had theorised about it.... couldnt we at least see what it would have done???? it didn’t have to be the final conflict!

ANYWAY i dont have as much to say about gravity falls as adventure time for obvious reasons so im going to rank it... Without further ado, it’s time to heavily overthink about cartoons!!!

Animation: 5 out of 5 hats - this is one of the most BRILLIANTLY ANIMATED childrens cartoon shows ive seen. there’s no weird inbetweens, the lighting for each scene is absolutely spot-on, it looks and feels amazing! honestly gravity falls looks like one of the strongest arguments for using script-driven shows instead of storyboard-driven shows, because cartoon network has never in its life produced something that looks this good. When it used 3D CGI it was implemented smoothly. The characters had no absence of body language and cues either, it was never boring to look at. Disney does it again!!!

Humor: 4 out of 5 hats - While I dont think this show is the literal funniest thing I’ve ever watched, it is consistently entertaining throughout the entire series which is more than I can say for the two cartoons (AT and SU) that i’m unfairly comparing it to. Humor is one of GF’s strongpoints, because the jokes it throws at you out of complete nowhere will always have you on ground. I laughed SO hard during this marathon, and the jokes are obscure enough that I’ll probably do the same thing on a rewatch. The animation helps significantly too. The character designs alone, especially Mabel and her sweaters, allow for plenty of visual humor. Soos is the sort of character that you dont know what hes going to do next. Grunkle Stan conning people got some of the hardest laughs out of me. Wendy is just.... Wendy reminds me so hard of early Marceline, except she will occasionally do something really cool cos shes from a family of lumberjacks. Let’s not forget Waddles, the MVP in the humor department.

Story: 3 out of 5 hats - If I made this post yesterday, I’d have ranked it 2 out of 5 hats. I never felt that there was any “story” to gravity falls, only some kind of ARG that added nothing to the experience because none of the questions were solvable until the answers had been revealed. But the second half of season 2 ups the ante on story by focusing on the Pines family and their relationships to each other, and you can feel tension rise especially when Dipper starts to hang aound Ford a little too much and you sense that poor Mabel is gonna be left in the dust just like Stan before her. Weirdmageddon also was way more entertaining than I expected! And how it ENDED? Oh jesus! The show’s final scenes were heartbreaking, if I’d been following for longer I might have started crying.

Characterisation: 4 out of 5 hats- holy crap, it’s just so much fun seeing the Pines family play off of each other. Each group has an entertaining dynamic, whether it’s playful like Mabel, Soos, and Wendy’s shenanigans, or more serious like Stan and Ford’s conflict. There was barely any time throughout the entire series that I was annoyed by how someone was acting, or thought that it was out of place and agitating. I think I might be giving this point a rather generous score because of how feelgood it was, rather than complex or deep, which in many areas it wasnt. For example earlier in the show the conflicts felt dumb, like the Jurassic Park episode where everyone was acting vaguely out of character to cause a sense of drama? idk. But later on it got more heartfelt, if predictable. Where else do I think it can do better?

Worldbuilding: 2 out of 5 hats - Yep, the area where I think Gravity Falls does the worst is worldbuilding. For 2 big reasons: The wasted potential of Gravity Falls itself, and the way its inhabitants were used. Maybe I’m just spoilt by the AMAZING job Adventure Time and Steven Universe do with this, but the land of Gravity Falls fails to be as interesting as Ooo or as realistic as Beach City. Idk, i think it’s more ENTERTAINING than Beach City but more because I get more laughs out of the show than recent SU. The issue with Gravity Falls’ civilians is that unless you’re a Pines, youre a straight up Cartoon Character. That rules your characterisation and your purpose for existence. This is fine and yes there are some memorable characters but they never have those hilarious moments of humanity, like the episode Root Beer Guy where the title character gets into conflict with his wife cos she thinks hes too involved with his actual realistic mystery novels, or the Graybles ep where Starchy ran away from the candy kingdom to get rid of a tracker in his tooth cos he knows PB was spying on him, and he runs a little club conspiring against her like some kind of real life political group. His club and Kim Kil Whan having King of Ooo memorabilia lmao. I’m getting too into this but its moments like that which make Adventure Time feel great.

As for GRAVITY FALLS ITSELF, yeah because the world doesn’t feel as real as it could be I never wanted to see what it had to offer next, and there’s never explanation for all of this. The journals play a much smaller role in the series than Dipper’s reactions over them would have you think. The closest thing to an explanation is the pondering over whether a spaceship caused the weirdness in GF or was drawn to the area because of this weirdness. But is it magic? Is it science? Is it different dimensions? Fuck knows! Is there any hint about the truth? I’m not sure! Yeah, not all things need to have answers, but it helps fire off the thinkpan. In Adventure Time the Land of Ooo’s weirdness is linked to an apocalypse that helped bring magic back to the land. The hint is that the magic potential was always there, because there were magical societies around millenia before humanity. Did magic disappear because of a comet hitting the planet? Is magic actually based on scientific principles? Like GF, not all these questions have direct answers, but unlike GF, you have enough incentive and evidence to construct your own theories. It lets you get absorbed in the lore of Ooo, of the characters inhibiting it. This is my own perspective anyway.

I think the most amazing mysteries I ever saw unwravel were Simon and Marcy’s adventures, and more relevant to my own experiences, PB’s age. Like there was puzzle pieces and hints around indicating Peebles had been around way longer than 18 years or whatever but we finally got confirmation in Season 5.2 where we saw consecutive episodes showing her in the past. The theory was that she was younger than 1000, but could be any age older than about 50. The Vault was a shock origin story for not just Finn having had a past life as a girl without an arm (THE ARM BEING ANOTHER ADVENTURE TIME THING THAT EVENTUALLY GOT some really back and forth PAYOFF), it was an origin story for peebles and the candy kingdom! but why would she make it?? ? yeah this was all stuff we were able to construct theories for, and accurate theories, because the evidence was there and more significantly the Writers were putting it together at the same time. It almost felt like we were having an INPUT in the story because of this natural way it evolved over time. That’s why AT’s mysteries are far more engaging than those of Gravity Falls, at least for me.... but maybe the same thing happened to GF fans????? Because I wasn’t there to put the pieces together, to study the Pines family or the Bill Zodiac which.... was almost as much a copout as Finn’s arm but its ok cos the stan deleting his memories shit was a decent end anyway. I just dont know why theyd put a mystery like that IN there if it was always going to be a red herring???

To conclude this description which..... ended up being another reason to talk about Adventure Time again, I want you to know that I REALLY enjoyed Gravity Falls. It reminded me of Over the Garden Wall in how it’s told, the characters it has, but much larger and grander than OtgW ever was.

My favourite characters were Stan and Mabel. Yeah, Dipper and Ford were very interesting characters too, but while they’re among the top of their trope, they still feel like an overdone trope to me.... especially dipper and his Issues,,, Stan meanwhile I liked that he was a runaway fuckup nobody as a child who became a professional conman after his parents kicked him out. That was an interesting backstory.

Gravity Falls, all in All, gets 3.5 out of 5 hats. To keep it real. Spend them wisely.

#gravity falls

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