Enjoy my poorly made meme

anyways

(CW for SA, suicidal ideation) Here we go. My favorite and simultaneously least favorite panel of Vash and Knives.

I've seen a few interpretations of this scene and before we dive into the one that really struck me, let's start with the more... chill one. We're finally introduced to the third gun of Trigun, Vash's angel arm. And the way we're introduced to it involves Knives forcing him to pull the trigger. Of course, since no one knows anything about Knives, the people of Noman's Land blame Vash for Fifth Moon, and Vash likewise blames himself (this is kinda a spoiler but if you've been paying attention, it's just par for the course). However, he's not the one who pulled the trigger, Knives is. It brings up an interesting moral question of blame - do we blame the gun (and Vash, who is being used/objectified as a weapon here), or the person who wanted it to happen? Guns don't kill people, genocidal twins do!

Now for the awful interpretation, the one that makes me cry and wish Vash was real so I could hug him and pay for his therapy. And really highlights how awful Knives is and how far he'd go for his brother in his own, fucked-up way. I touched on this in a previous post about Legato and the Murder Cafe, and the whole time I was thinking about Fifth Moon but didn't want to say anything for the sake of spoilers.

So. Pay attention to the way Vash and Knives are standing. Knives, when he first grabbed Vash's head, was standing in front of him. He moves behind him to better control him and yeah, he's still controlling him via hand on head, and now he's got his other hand gripping Vash's chest, where feathers/wings are manifesting. Knives is assaulting him. If you wanna get crazy with it and say that the angel arm is kinda phallic, you could say... yeah. This is rape. I heard that specific interpretation once and while I accepted it I also don't know if that would be generally accepted or if I'd be called out for it, so I'm trying to tread lightly here.

It also doesn't escape me that of course the angel arm has feminine features like the plants - the plants that, again, humans are exploiting for their ability to create. There's a lot of feminist commentary to be made here but many people have said it better than me. Specifically I'm thinking of this one post I saw about gender fuckery and Tristamp Vash. Anyway.

Also, the atomic bomb/black hole/sun/whatever that is in the middle... It's just so powerful. It's terrifying. The eldritch body horror here is a punch to the gut. What the fuck, Trigun? I thought this was a funky space western!!!

Oh, and here's more commentary on the following few panels:

Vashussy shot, Knives is still right behind him. Yeah, I wasn't kidding about how bad this pose is for them. Knives, you sick fuck.

Vash shoots himself in the leg (a key difference from '98 trigun, lol), because of course he does, but it doesn't free him from the arm.

The arm's getting darker/the light inside is getting lighter! Stampede did an awesome job with their interpretation of the angel arm and I don't think I would have understood it without that. Also, on my first read I didn't notice that Vash is literally levitating, which is cool, but also terrifying because ?? he's not in control of that either??

Finally. A super painful, minimalist, double-page spread. Nightow loves 'em. Vash thinks he's dying (maybe?) and he wishes he had never existed. It's not suicidal ideation per se, but he wishes he didn't exist at all because he's already caused enough suffering. This is a low for him, because he believes so strongly in the concept of the Blank Ticket. (Come on, soupy brain bitch boy, get it together!) He's a monster, it's just how he was born, and he's not in control. Very specifically too, he says "we", and then changes it to "I"... he doesn't blame Knives at all, and that's very him. I want to shake him! Stop playing the martyr, Vash!

Buck: *kisses Eddie's forehead* Buck: *freezes* Hen: Did you just... kiss his forehead? Buck: *nervously* Yeah, it's a new thing I am trying where I kiss everyone's foreheads when they do a good job. Buck: *grabs Chim and plants a kiss on his forehead* Great job cleaning the engines, Chim! Buck: *grabs Hen's face before she can react and plants a kiss on her forehead* Great job organizing the supply closets, Hen! Hen: *Swats at him* Get away from me! Buck: *makes a move on Bobby* Bobby: You even try to kiss me and I will fire you! Buck: Noted

adhd

man, DE fic piss me off a little sometimes asdfgk. i think u guys are greatly overestimating how much police can or are willing to do, and what cases they are incentivized to actually pursue.

when my mom's apartment was broken into a year ago, her next door neighbor literally got one of the guys on camera, and the police basically shrugged and went "sorry! nothing we can do!". when one of the men broke in again a week later, while my sister was home alone, when she could have been attacked, when she saw the guy face to face, again they were like "sorry! nothing we can do!"

which isn't to say i think they should have gone all supercop to solve the case. what the fuck are they gonna do, manhunt the guys across the city based on grainy camera footage? what would my mom and sister even gain from that, what would the community gain from that, having cops hovering around and then maybe throwing two poor guys from the neighborhood into prison? it's just reality that there's only so few resources to solve these things, so many dead ends, and more harm than benefit to the socioeconomic circumstance of the area.

it's just kind of irksome seeing fic casually talk about all the crimes precinct 41 and C-wing are pursuing and solving, when in reality most probably wouldn't even reach their desks before they were waved away as a dead case. or if they did reach their unit, still wouldn't be solved because it's simply too big of a gamble of time and resources. according to pew research center, in the US, about 45% of violent crime cases are solved each year, and only about 18% of property crime. and that's only the solve rate for the reported cases. it is in fact copaganda and simply inaccurate to portray the police as though they make a significant impact on crime, when more than half the time they're going, "sorry! nothing we can do!" 👍

turns the saturation to 11

hey friends hope everyone's doing well!! these past few weeks have been filled with a lot of readjustments and reflections on certain parts of my life, but it's been fulfilling and it's been necessary. although i've been off of mcytblr, i've kept up with what's been happening in the fandom, and i'm happy to see this community having important discussions around abuse, assault, power imbalance, and parasocialism.

what's been made abundantly clear as more and more people speak up about their experiences with certain content creators within the space is that we truly do not know any of them. it's something we've talked about time and time again, but truly this has been a wake-up call for hopefully not just me, but for all of us.

i've also noticed a lot of victim blaming that has occurred as these incidents are brought to light (not necessarily within mcytblr, moreso from the general public and horrible people who are trying to ride off of the drama). while i hope no one here is feeding into this harmful rhetoric and proving exactly why these people were initially too scared to speak up, it's important to remind everyone that abuse and assault does not just fit into one mold and diminishing other people's experiences that you deem "not bad enough" makes you no better than the people who do not care regardless.

support shelby, alice, caiti, andi, and every other person who has or will come out and expose the terrible actions committed by content creators in this space. support victims, always. remain kind and compassionate and continue to show empathy first and foremost. these victims do not want your sympathy, they just want to be heard and initiate a long-overdue discussion. don't take away or diminish their voices.

Okay now that Anissa is in the show, I have to talk about THAT storyline. There's not much particularly new I can say that hasn't already been discussed but I need to gather my thoughts on what the show has to do to be successful in this regard. With that being said,

Spoilers for things the show has not covered yet

And massive Trigger Warning for discussions of sexual assault and post-assault trauma.

So first things out of the way, I do not believe they should cut it. The changes the show has made are ultimately pretty minor. A character change, order of events swapped. With them sticking as close as they are to the comic, I think it would be a massive problem to skip over it from a story telling standpoint.

From a real world standpoint, it's even more important. Male sexual assault is something that rarely gets depicted properly. It's usually a joke or a moment of triumph and that very much has had an effect on the way we look at it in the real world. And since Invincible is now a show pretty much everybody has their eyes on, choosing not to talk about it would be missing an opportunity to have a very real, very important conversation that very well could educate men on how to navigate and survive what they are going through.

I'm also worried that they'll be too afraid to actually say the word "rape". Lots of modern adaptations delete important discussions like Sokka's sexism or the gender discussions from Cowboy Bebop in order to avoid properly handling them and usually replace them with something worse in a sort of "all bark and no bite" liberalism. Directly saying it as it is is incredibly important to showing that talking about it is not only NOT shameful, but also necessary in getting the help you need and the healing that is necessary to survive.

And from a storytelling standpoint, saying it is important too. The moment where Mark tells Eve what happened is not only great in showing that telling someone is important but is also the moment where Mark is forced to admit the truth to himself. "She raped me." Those three words are a massive turning point for the whole story. Character dynamics change, this becomes a focus for most of Mark's loved ones, and it fundamentally changes his life.

Markus. This is a piece of the puzzle I don't see many talk about. While the rest is a showcase of what to do, Markus as a character is a showcase of what not to. It is so, so rare that a child conceived of a rape is properly depicted, nevermind discussed. From Mark's POV, he holds no ill will towards his son. He simply wants him to live a life on Earth with his family like he did and just can't be with him because he is needed in space. But to Markus, his dad hates him. He thinks his father keeps him on Earth so that he doesn't have to think about him. And this idea of his father's disgust contorts his image of himself. He begins to feel self-hatred, hatred towards his mother for making him this way, and hatred towards his father for abandoning him and leaving him to despise what he sees in the mirror. "You made Terra with love. I was made with hate."

Whether Mark meant it or not, his neglect of Markus ruined his early life. No matter how many friends he made, what groups he joined, they could never fill that hole. He idolized his father. I mean, how could he not? His father was, IS a great hero. A man who was out at that very moment leading the movement for universal peace. But because Mark barely visited him, he only had an idea of what his father was like. A man who sacrificed so much to help the world, who fought in space and yet still managed to save the Earth dozens of times. A man who had the time to help everyone and yet couldn't make time for him.

(Important edit: in no way do I mean to say Mark is obligated to be a part of his son's life, I meant that Mark chooses to be there but ultimately fails to do so and that causes issues)

And don't get me wrong, this story has some pretty glaring flaws. For example I think they tried a little too hard to teach Mark that the person who hurt him is human too and has positively affected the lives of many. Like absolutely there is a conversation to be had there but because they had to move on with the plot they kinda just went "HEY MARK DON'T BE SAD SHE'S COOL NOW AND ALSO SHE'S DEAD SO THERE'S NO POINT IN LINGERING OKAY BYYEEEEE". But I think instead of these flaws scaring the show away they should invite the show forward. It's an opportunity to improve on the story and discussions rather than shy away from it.

Oh and also harking back to my previous point in paragraph 2, there's another aspect that makes it stand out in an important discussion. If I'm remembering correctly, the comic makes it pretty clear that Mark could have overpowered Anissa but didn't for a couple of reasons, namely not wanting to hurt her. And that is SO important and SO rare. A discussion surrounding an assault victim who could have fought back but didn't where the victim is NOT portrayed as in the wrong and in fact just as worthy to be traumatized as any other victim is SO DAMN IMPORTANT and could legit change a lot in the way we look at these topics.

So yeah, I think the series should adapt it. Also I think it would be great if they brought on actual victims and experts and whatnot so their depiction could be just that much more focused around what needs to be said. Sorry if all this read as klunky, I have a lot of thoughts bouncing around up here that I kinda just spewed onto the page with no particular order. I'm also obviously not the most educated on the topic. My personal experiences with this were relatively minor and not something I've ever felt comfortable addressing. And yeah I know it's important no matter how "small" or "minor" it seems and I'm not trying to downplay any of that but I just don't really have the words to phrase that differently. Which is exactly why I think we NEED education and discussions about this stuff so that we DO know the words to navigate the topic.

Dogboy stu here, dogboy stu there, how about some HYENAboy stu for a little bit of variety (this idea wouldn't leave my head until I finally doodled it real quick) ((this is my first time ever touching a furry art style and it is BLATANT))

Yeah, Billy's still a cat. Once a catboy always a catboy.