#stop recommending me this bullshit
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I hope this isn't another misogynistic shiv hating video in my recommendations made by a man who needs to shut the fuck up!
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Me, looking through books on Palestine: "Ilan Pappé wrote one called 'The Biggest Prison On Earth?!' People in Gaza hate it being called a prison. There's an entire hashtag for it. There's been an account dedicated to collecting pics and videos of #TheGazaYouDontSee for 6 years.
"Is Pappé even Palestinian? oh god wait I can tell already. this is gonna be an 'Israeli apologist' isn't it."
Internet: "Yeah, Pappé's Israeli."
Me: "For fuck's--- so people will believe Israelis unquestioningly if they're shit-talking Israel, but in all other situations, Israelis are all liars?"
Internet: "Pretty much. Also, at best, Ilan Pappé must be one of the world’s sloppiest historians."
Me, admittedly in full schadenfreude now: "What?!?!"
Internet: "Benny Morris. That historian who's extremely hard-core about primary source documentation, who wrote that detailed book about how and why each group of Palestinian refugees left in 1947-9. He reviewed three books about Palestine."
Me: "Holy shit. And the book by Pappé is about the Husaynis. The family that Nazi war criminal Amin al-Husseini came from, the guy who fucked absolutely everything up for both Israel and Palestine."
Internet: "That's the one. Morris wrote, 'At best, Ilan Pappe must be one of the world’s sloppiest historians; at worst, one of the most dishonest. In truth, he probably merits a place somewhere between the two.'"
Me: "Why??"
Internet: "He says, 'Here is a clear and typical example—in detail, which is where the devil resides—of Pappe’s handiwork. I take this example from The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine'....
"Blah blah blah, basically in 1947 the UN voted to partition the land into Palestine and Israel, and extremist militias started shooting at Jewish towns and people. David Ben-Gurion was the leader of the Jewish community there, and his journal describes a visit from a scientist named Aharon Katzir, telling him about an experiment codenamed "Shimshon." Morris gives us the journal entry:
...An experiment was conducted on animals. The researchers were clothed in gas masks and suit. The suit costs 20 grush, the mask about 20 grush (all must be bought immediately). The operation [or experiment] went well. No animal died, the [animals] remained dazzled [as when a car’s headlights dazzle an oncoming driver] for 24 hours. There are some 50 kilos [of the gas]. [They] were moved to Tel Aviv. The [production] equipment is being moved here. On the laboratory level, some 20 kilos can be produced per day.
"Morris says, 'This is the only accessible source that exists, to the best of my knowledge, about the meeting and the gas experiment, and it is the sole source cited by Pappe for his description of the meeting and the "Shimshon" project. But this is how Pappe gives the passage in English:
Katzir reported to Ben-Gurion: 'We are experimenting with animals. Our researchers were wearing gas masks and adequate outfit. Good results. The animals did not die (they were just blinded). We can produce 20 kilos a day of this stuff.'
"'The translation is flecked with inaccuracies, but the outrage is in Pappe’s perversion of "dazzled," or sunveru, to "blinded"—in Hebrew "blinded" would be uvru, the verb not used by Ben-Gurion—coupled with the willful omission of the qualifier '"for 24 hours."'
"'Pappe’s version of this text is driven by something other than linguistic and historiographical accuracy. Published in English for the English-speaking world, where animal-lovers are legion and deliberately blinding animals would be regarded as a barbaric act, the passage, as published by Pappe, cannot fail to provoke a strong aversion to Ben-Gurion and to Israel.
"'Such distortions, large and small, characterize almost every page of The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine. So I should add, to make the historical context perfectly clear, that no gas was ever used in the war of 1948 by any of the participants. [Or, he later notes, by either Israel or Palestine ever.] Pappe never tells the reader this.
"'Raising the subject of gas is historical irrelevance. But the paragraph will dangle in the reader’s imagination as a dark possibility, or worse, a dark reality: the Jews, gassed by the Nazis three years before, were about to gas, or were gassing, Arabs.'"
Me: "Uuuuggghhhhhhhhh. Yeah, it will."
Internet: "He does say, 'Palestinian Dynasty was a good idea.' Then he does some really detailed historian-dragging about the lack of primary sources and reliance on people's interpretations of what they say instead.
"'Almost all of Pappe’s references direct the reader to books and articles in English, Hebrew, and Arabic by other scholars, or to the memoirs of various Arab politicians, which are not the most reliable of sources. Occasionally there is a reference to an Arab or Western travelogue or genealogy, or to a diplomat’s memoir; but there is barely an allusion to documents in the relevant British, American, and Zionist/Israeli archives.
"'When referring to the content of American consular reports about Arab riots in the 1920s, for example, Pappe invariably directs the reader to an article in Hebrew by Gideon Biger—“The American Consulate in Jerusalem and the Events of 1920-1921,” in Cathedra, September 1988—and not to the documents themselves, which are easily accessible in the United States National Archive.
"'Those who falsify history routinely take the path of omission. They ignore crucial facts and important pieces of evidence while cherry-picking from the documentation to prove a case.
"'Those who falsify history routinely take the path of omission. They ignore crucial facts and important pieces of evidence while cherry-picking from the documentation to prove a case.
"'But Pappe is more brazen. He, too, often omits and ignores significant evidence, and he, too, alleges that a source tells us the opposite of what it in fact says, but he will also simply and straightforwardly falsify evidence.
"'Consider his handling of the Arab anti-Jewish riots of the 1920s.
"'Pappe writes of the “Nabi Musa” riots in April 1920: “The [British] Palin Commission... reported that the Jewish presence in the country was provoking the Arab population and was the cause of the riots.” He also quotes at length Musa Kazim al-Husayni, the clan’s leading notable at the time, to the effect that “it was not the [Arab] Hebronites who had started the riots but the Jews.”
"'But the (never published) [Palin Commission Report], while forthrightly anti-Zionist, thereby accurately reflecting the prevailing views in the British military government that ruled Palestine until mid-1920, flatly and strikingly charged the Arabs with responsibility for the bloodshed.
"'The team chaired by Major-General P.C. Palin wrote that “it is perfectly clear that with... few exceptions the Jews were the sufferers, and were, moreover, the victims of a peculiarly brutal and cowardly attack, the majority of the casualties being old men, women and children.” The inquiry pointed out that whereas 216 Jews were killed or injured, the British security forces and the Jews, in defending themselves or in retaliatory attacks, caused only twenty-five Arab casualties.'"
Me: "Yeah. I'm looking at that report right now and it says there had been an explosion, and then people were looting Jewish stores and beating Jews with stones, and in one case stabbing someone. Some people said that some Jews got up on the roof of a hotel and retaliated by throwing stones themselves.
"And then it literally says, 'The point as to the retaliation by Jews is of importance because it seems to have impressed the Military and led them to imagine that the Jews were to some extent responsible for provoking the rising.' That's the only thing it really says about anyone blaming the Jews.
"Except.... the very beginning gives some historical context. And it does say that when the Balfour Declaration came out, Muslims and Christians 'considered that they were to be handed over to an oppression which they hated far more than the Turk's and were aghast at the thought of this domination....
"'If this intensity of feeling proceeded merely from wounded pride of race and disappointment in political aspirations, it would be easier to criticise and rebuke: but it must be borne in mind that at the bottom of all is a deepseated fear of the Jew, both as a possible ruler and as an economic competitor. Rightly or wrongly they fear the Jew as a ruler, regarding his race as one of the most intolerant known to history....
"'The prospect of extensive Jewish immigration fills him with a panic fear, which may be exaggerated, but is none the less genuine. He sees the ablest race intellectually in the world, past-masters in all the arts of ousting competitors whether on the market, in the farm or the bureaucratic offices, backed by apparently inexhaustible funds given by their compatriots in all lands and possessed of powerful influence in the councils of the nations, prepared to enter the lists against him in every one of his normal occupations, backed by the one thing wanted to make them irresistible, the physical force of a great Imperial Power, and he feels himself overmastered and defeated before the contest is begun.'
"Wow! What a great fucking example of how 'positive' stereotypes are actually used to fuck people over! We're not antisemitic, we actually think Jews are the smartest, most powerful, richest group with tremendous global power! So positive!! Not at all being used here to justify antisemitic violence!
"Also, immigration from all over the world actually meant that different agricultural and manufacturing techniques were brought into the region, and yes, financial investments to start businesses sometimes, which meant that Arab Palestinians there had the highest per capita income in the Middle East, the highest daily wages, and started a lot of businesses of their own. But go off, I guess."
"Anyfuckingway.... it basically says that the Muslims and Christians were angry and scared, the Jews were too quick to set up the functioning government that the Brits were supposed to be there to help both sides create -- and which the Arab leaders completely refused to create for Palestine, because (1) fascists and (2) didn't want Jews nearby -- and that they were "ready prey for any form of agitation hostile to the British Government and the Jews." Then it says the movement for a United Syria was agitating them real hard, and so were the Sherifians.
"Is that what Ilan Passe, I mean Pappe, meant by the Palin Report blaming the Jews?! That when it says it's understandable the Arabs were freaking out, because antisemitism, Pappe thinks it's saying the Jews were provoking them?!"
Internet: "I don't know. I kinda tuned out after the first hour you were talking."
Me: "OGH MY GOD"
Internet: "So anyway, then Morris ALSO says, 'About the 1929 “Temple Mount” riots, which included two large-scale massacres of Jews, in Hebron and in Safed, Pappe writes: “The opposite camp, Zionist and British, was no less ruthless [than the Arabs]. In Jaffa a Jewish mob murdered seven Palestinians.”
Me: "What the ENTIRE FUCK? There was no united 'Zionist and British' camp! The Brits would barely let any Holocaust refugees in, ffs!"
Internet: "Morris says, 'Actually, there were no massacres of Arabs by Jews, though a number of Arabs were killed when Jews defended themselves or retaliated after Arab violence.
"'Pappe adds that the British “Shaw Commission,” so-called because it was chaired by Sir Walter Shaw (a former chief justice of the Straits Settlements), which investigated the riots, “upheld the basic Arab claim that Jewish provocations had caused the violent outbreak. ‘The principal cause... was twelve years of pro-Zionist [British] policy.’”
"'It is unclear what Pappe is quoting from. I did not find this sentence in the commission’s report. Pappe’s bibliography refers, under “Primary Sources,” simply to “The Shaw Commission.” The report? The deliberations? Memoranda by or about? Who can tell?
"'The footnote attached to the quote, presumably to give its source, says, simply, “Ibid.”
"'The one before it says, “Ibid., p. 103.”
"'The one before that says, “The Shaw Commission, session 46, p. 92.”
"'But the quoted passage does not appear on page 103 of the report.
"In the text of Palestinian Dynasty, Pappe states that “Shaw wrote [this] after leaving the country [Palestine].” But if it is not in the report, where did Shaw “write” it?'"
Me: "I'M ON IT. [rapid-fire googling] OMG. This is.... Not the first time. In 'The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine,' he reported that in a 1937 letter to his son, David Ben-Gurion declared: 'The Arabs will have to go, but one needs an opportune moment for making it happen, such as war.'
"It's not in the source he gave. It's not in any of the three different sources he's given for it.
"He apparently has never responded to any requests for an explanation, either from the journal he published in, or from other historians. But it says he did "obliquely [acknowledge] the controversy in an article in Electronic Intifada, in which he portrayed himself as the victim of intimidation at the hands of “Zionist hooligans.”'
"This is absolutely fucking wild. THEN it says the chair of the Ethics Committee where he was teaching eventually said that the second part of the quote ('but one needs,' etc) was a (combined?) paraphrase of a diary entry and a speech Ben-Gurion gave, and that the first half is 'based on' a letter to his son.
"And it's so convincing! The chair says, 'Shabtai Teveth[,] Ben Gurion’s biographer, Benny Morris and the historian Nur Maslaha have all quoted this letter. In fact their translation was stronger than the quotation from Professor Pappé: ‘We must expel the Arabs and take their place.’ Professor Pappé has documentary evidence of these quotations and the source will ensure that this is correctly cited in any future editions of the publication or related studies.'
"And IT'S NOT EVEN TRUE?!
"Ben-Gurion's actual diary entry (not a letter) says the opposite.
“'We do not want and do not need to expel Arabs and take their places.... All our aspiration is built on the assumption – proven throughout all our activity – that there is enough room in the country for ourselves and the Arabs.'
"Benny Morris misquoted it as "We must expel the Arabs and take their places" in the English version of his 1987 book The Birth of the Palestinian Refugee Problem, although it was correct in the Hebrew version. He corrected himself in the 2001 book Righteous Victims.
"Teveth also misquoted it in the English version of his 1985 book Ben-Gurion and the Palestinian Arabs, but again, had it correct in the Hebrew edition.
"And both Morris and Teveth explicitly point out the rest of the entry. The part about all their aspiration being built on the assumption and experience that there was enough room in the country for everyone.
"Historian Efraim Karsh’s 1997 book Fabricating Israeli History pointed out and corrected their mistakes.
"This is apparently a very well-known issue among historians of Israel and Palestine. It was a big deal in 2003, when an evangelist Christian publisher put out a book FULL of disinformation, which not only used the same quote as Pappe does, but also could not give a real source for it.
"But Pappe STILL USED THE MISQUOTE AND DOUBLED DOWN ON IT EVERY SINGLE TIME."
Internet: "Are you done? I know all this already."
Me: "Also, there are literally only two places where the phrase 'twelve years of pro-Zionist policy' shows up online, and they're both about Pappe making quotes up.
"NOW I'm done."
Benny Morris wasn't, though. The review continues at the link below. And the next part starts, "To the deliberate slanting of history Pappe adds a profound ignorance of basic facts. Together these sins and deficiencies render his “histories” worthless as representations of the past, though they are important as documents in the current political and historiographic disputations about the Arab-Israeli conflict. Pappe’s grasp of the facts of World War I, for example, is weak in the extreme."
#i hate people misrepresenting history in general#i extra hate it when people do it with malice aforethought#ilan pappe#is a lying liar and people need to stop recommending his bullshit when it's been so thoroughly debunked#this is a good example of anti-Zionism being antisemitism tbh. I have yet to see anti-Zionist accounts of history that are accurate#like if you have to victim-blame people who were baked in ovens during an anti-Jewish riot you are PROBABLY in the wrong#I was looking for a piece explaining the 1920 and 1929 anti-Jewish riots that I could link here that wasn't from an explicitly Jewish sourc#because I don't trust people to take an article from the Jewish Virtual Library or whatever without being like “this is Zionist propaganda!#even if it's about an extremely violent massacre of Jews#so I clicked specifically on the Encyclopedia of the Palestine Question and similar sources#and what all of them did was gloss right over the massacres and violence and just vaguely mention “the demonstrations in 1920”#or not mention them at all of course#I guess that makes sense but wow. now I understand more of how ignorant people are about the entire history here#not only has it all been presented to you as “this started in 1947 or 48! the Jews stole all the land! it's been genocide ever since!”#so that people literally tell me “they invaded in 1947 and kicked out the Palestinians and took their land”#but also you have to fill in anything before that yourself#and the only propaganda you have access to usually is this myth that everyone was perfectly happy together until Israel... killed everyone?#it's really super weird to see people say that Jews and Muslims and Christians all lived happily together before this#like what do you think happened? everyone was happy and suddenly the jews were like “fuck you we're taking over and killing everyone?”#that probably is what people think happened tbh#they don't need for there to be any motivation or for that to make sense because they've bought the idea that it's just pure evil ig#for some reason people have to reverse-engineer hamas's massacre and imagine that israel did even worse to justify it#a terrorist group doesn't come out of nowhere! i don't think you know what terrorism is tbh#but they're happy to assume that whatever they think israel did came out of nowhere#god i'm fucking tired#anyway fuck ilan pappe#there are WAY BETTER HISTORIES OF PALESTINE#i've heard good things about Gaza: A History but of course that's not all of palestine#long post#such a long post
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Crack? Do they smoke crack? Is that it?? 😂😂
I mean tumblr should really know better than to recommend me bullshit like these.
#I mean if y'all want to get down it we can 👀👀👀#like we have twow#and we have the thing 👀👀👀👀👀#but y'all won't admit it#anyway#nah none of the girls are like the queen#but you all are really smarting about Dany bringing about the change you want your fave to bring#without getting her hands dirty of course#tumblr stop recommending me bullshit challenge
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Bruh, I did not just get recommended a 31 year old Black Butler anti on Tumblr-fucking-.com...
How are you a whole ass decade older than me, yet still have the mindset that liking fictional shit makes you a bad person irl??? That shit makes no Goddamn sense, man.
Especially for a BLACK BUTLER FAN of all people! Bruh, how are you 31 years old and can't see what's right in front of you?!? JFC.
Ngl this actually made me lose brain cells and more of my faith in humanity. 🫠💀
#im so tired of seeing this shit man#anti anti bullshit#anti anti#antis dni#proship#black butler#kuroshitsuji#fandom nonsense#tumblr stop recommending these people to me#small rant#thekingspeaks
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ik a mention rgg nerfing ttm's features when modelin sawashiro every five minutes but they really had to cause aint no way in hell would a been intimated by this bruv if they didnt
#snap chats#oh im fucked i really put 'a' instead of 'i'. whatever thats how i pronounce it we goin phonetic baby#did ou know i remember abolutely nothing about the ending of drive. i watched it while drinking two soju#DO NOT RECOMMEND by responsible#to totally contradict myself im drinkin nigori i bought . i didnt know alcohol cold frreeze and i accidentally froze it ☠️☠️☠️#iiii ALOMST knocked my cup over ohmy gd#moving on. legality to say soem BULLSHIT noowt ho#anyway n o lsien to me ttm's 38 in this movie and sawashiro's 38 in 2000. probably. i cant do math rn Or Ever point is About Same Age#this IS from drive. great movie. and this is one of his cuter/sillier roles imo so awkward comp but ill still speak#main text got me lying i was out of pocket seeing bro frame 1 anyways but it woulda been a diff vibe this route lsten to me#hes just too cute bro . bye. fymhes an antagonist hes too cte for that <- his filmography prves otherwise#gon try to start an argument with me what you gon do mate kiss me ??? enough.#i like how ttm just has A Vibe to him. Apparently. he always playin awkward mates.... back then anyway..#postman blues did him so dirty bein all 'slender-framed mates are more prone to socipathy' LKE LEAVE HIM ALONNNE#wehhh i wish they mocapped his facial expressions more accuraltey in rgg. and his teeth. his smle still cute to me..#i sound lke my mom when she talks bout lee joongi whenever i talk bout ttm ew lke bye. stop#ok im going bak to playing mincraft now bye#oh my gd when did it become 2AM literally suck my ween
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LIAR YOU TOTALLY WATCHED ONE SEQUEL!!! 😉💜
https://www.tumblr.com/wellhalesbells/736050291745652736/friendraichu-jackironsides
HAHAHAHA, I should clarify that I just mean for super hero-y ones. I mostly watch the first one and rarely watch the second (or anything after...... or remakes, lol), I think the only Marvel one I've seen in recent history is Thor: Ragnarok. Actually, the Spider-man franchise pretty much encapsulates how I interact with Marvel properties: I saw the first trilogy because it was new and exciting at the time, then they remade it too fast and I refused to pay for something I just saw, that was so recent in my memory from the release date I could still remember exact scenes from it (THERE WERE ONLY FIVE YEARS BETWEEN SPIDER-MAN 3 AND THE REBOOT - THAT IS NOT ENOUGH TIME FOR ME TO GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THAT AGAIN. HOW IS THAT ENOUGH TIME FOR ANYONE TO GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THAT AGAIN???), then I watched the first Tom Holland one (fourteen years I can vibe with) and nothing that followed because that's generally when the gimmicks and cameos start in lieu of good story-telling, or they make it dark and gritty because that's the only way to ground this superhuman, right (I assume a random white guy: "Should we fridge a lady? Yeah, we should probably fridge a lady"). The first one generally at least tries to have a soul because they have to introduce the character and make you care about them but many of the ones that follow (the few I've seen from when the MCU was just starting out and I had hope *coughs*Iron Man 2, Thor 2, etc.*coughs*) are just cash grabs that don't try because you already love this character and there they are, right there, so money please!
Meg 2 however..... EPIC, NO NOTES. It knows if I was a shark girl, I was probably a dinosaur girl and it gambled correctly. That's what you're watching this for? Have three sharks and an unnecessary (probably stupid expensive) dinosaur intro that is nearly completely irrelevant to the story but that you will also not want to live without and for an extra special bonus: oblivious husbands and their brilliant daughter. Like. You got me nailed, my dude. Will watch every subsequent sequel, no questions asked.
#i do understand that spider-man is a bullshit studio thing#and that it's a marvel property that belongs to sony and i implied everything is under the mcu umbrella#(and i honestly don't fault them for remaking it. instead i just don't understand how there was an audience for it???)#but they're all guilty of the same shit for different but also EXACTLY THE SAME reasons#they want to fleece money from me. because that's how it feels: like i'm being swindled#they're not earning my money through good content but instead through brand recognition and shared cultural touchstones#YOU CAN'T HAVE MY MONEY MOUSE#sony you can when it's miles (that is a sequel i DID watch and that DID have a soul imo) :))))#something similar (cash grabs) are pretty much the exact reason i stopped reading marvel comics too#capitalism ruins everything#for a moral everyone knows *snorts*#also generally the sequels have bigger budgets and just to quote freckle...... sometimes things that are expensive are worse#great things sometimes come from people having to work within constraints and when you aren't given any....... terrible things can happen#like bbc sherlock lolol. AHEM#basically if i watch a sequel now it has to be a character i am VERY invested in so i'm willing to be burned - deadpool or miles#or it has to break containment from people who will go see anything with a marvel sticker on it to people who..... won't#and still recommend it - like ragnarok#(i wonder if NOT going the dark gritty route and instead having a fun story with a conflict that wasn't dependent on outdoing every#other conflict that came before it in this whole universe had aNYTHING to do with its success. hrm. it's a mystery!)#normally i would answer this privately but i had to explain about the sony thing so you would know i KNEW about the sony thing and then....#tag explosion and now it has to be public and i'm sorry i went on a mouse rant. I HATE THE MONOPOLY MOUSE I JUST DO.#IT'S BAD AND IT MAKES BAD LAZY THINGS THAT KILL CREATIVITY (AND NOW ALSO FUNDS GENOCIDE SO)#!ask
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Tumblr recommending me a post of a TERF being (accurately) called a Peter Griffin lookalike, ouuuu you know I had a hearty chuckle
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Just screamed so loud in my car that both my ears rang and a spider fell from the ceiling. My throat hurts.
#my pharmacy won't fill my meds AGAIN because some motherfucker decided to make a new policy that requires more instructions or something#i keep not getting my meds when I need them because every time i get a new script sent out (like one I haven't been on before) i hear...#...nothing back from the pharmacy; generally for days; and then when i call them (every 10 or 15 or 30 minutes for several hours) no...#...one picks up the goddamn phone and i have to make time to go in in person and ask the pharmacist when my meds will be ready.#and then they tell me 'oh yeah we HAVE the script from your doctor. we just need MORE INFORMATION and sent them an ELECTRONIC NOTE...#...(reminder that i live in fucking rural idaho so most people use a fucking phone and not 'an electronic note') and haven't heard back...#...from them yet so we're just waiting on that :)' and then i have to smile and thank them bc it isn't their fucking fault the policy is...#...some fucking bullshit and then i have to call my doctor on the phone (and can never reach them directly so i have to get a...#...receptionist to leave them a note that i HOPE they'll see in the next couple of days but sometimes they don't) and since i never have...#...an emergency it's often 2 or more weeks before anyone gets back to me. i usually have to call the pharmacy again. and then they don't...#...always answer and i usually have to go in and ask AGAIN why my meds aren't ready and they go 'oh we're still waiting on your doctor'...#...:) or 'they sent us a message back but it wasn't ENOUGH information and we sent them another ELECTRONIC NOTE that they won't see for...#...days or weeks so we recommend YOU call your doctor even though we're the ones flinging you around like a rag doll and you have 0...#...control over it. and by the way we're going to continue doing this for like a fucking year every time you get a new script. and when...#...your doctor asks you if the new meds are working you're going to have to say 'i have no fucking clue because it took 6 weeks to get...#...my goddamn prescription filled and it takes 3 months for the medication to show signs of working so my pharmacy wasted HALF of that...#...time sending electronic notes instead of filling my motherfucking prescription and i was supposed to be off these meds by summer...#...since they cause intense sunburn and shit and i have an OUTDOOR JOB NOW but my acne is still bad and hasn't gone away enough to stop...#...using the super intense stuff and my face hurts and swells and oozes and i have to wear a wide-brimmed hat and sunscreen EVERY time...#...i go outside because i can get a sunburn in 20 minutes now and i've been having heat rashes from the sun for the first time in my...#...LIFE and i have to fucking monitor myself every time i go outside and it's the warm season and i need a new pair of lighter work...#...pants but they don't sell above a size 18 for women even though men go up to like a size 45 which is like a size 24 or 26 in women's...#...and men's pants don't fit me bc i was blessed with the largest ass in the history of mankind' and i am so. fucking. tired.#of all the bullshit.#i feel miserable. my mom is buying me otc imodium bc i have NO IDEA when my prescription will come available. i just want the cramping...#...to stop. i've been having diarrhea all day every day since sunday. the cramps HURT and they keep me up at night. i haven't been...#...eating much bc there's so much shit moving around and hurting in my gut that i can't feel when i'm hungry and food doesn't soumd great.#so i'm weak and slow and tired and can't go to work and i'm using up all the sick days i was hoping to save up to visit my friend in...#...cyprus this winter. so that probably can't happen. but anyways. my mom came by while i was typing this out and i feel betterish.#personal
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very cool of youtube to randomly recommend me a video with a transphobic slur in the title AND thumbnail. very normal recommendations
#dove talks#random youtube recommendations are almost universally the worst and i wish they’d stop showing them to me#what do i watch that prompts them to show me such rock bottom right wing bullshit content? because the stuff i watch is the fuckin opposite
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This is how I know English classes aren’t teaching people actual literary analysis
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Why is my 'for you' suddenly filled with blogs encouraging and about religion like tumblr... please... do you even know me at all?
#I joke about worshipping satan bc of my love of ghost but like#I am not religious#and I never will be unless god or the devil or thor himself descends or ascends and presents themselves to me#so stop recommending that bullshit to me for (ironically) the love of god#I'm so grateful for the block bottom
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would you party with me?
#I’m lame#ok ok listen stop for a second!#I know this is like bullshit faux edibles or whatever. whatever.#the good stuff is still illegal here and I’m not about to shell out $100+ just to get some shitty card. I’m too lazy for that.#I don’t care enough for that. it’s a whatever thing.#and my therapist recommended this stuff so… fuck. it’s kinda medicinal#hey I ordered it and it arrived quickly. it was cheap. let me do my thing babe#just let me enjoy myself in peace!#hehe enjoy myself#anyway I got a cool ass Gundam kit for pretty cheap 👍#I got a burger#trying this stuff for the first time. just sitting here waiting for it to kick in#I’m a baby okay? drugs kinda scare me sometimes#the last real smoke session I had was an absolutely abysmal high#it took awhile to move on from that#I mean if you wanna dig through about uhhhh 2 or so? years of texts posts you can read about it#if this is a bad experience I’m gonna be sad#unless I don’t even feel anything… then also maybe sad. but not as sad.#this is dumb#I’m just a dumb old man#I’m working up my anxiety over nothing#gotta chill#hey you got games on your phone?#ok I love you goodbye forever#text#mine
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[I only have 30 pounds in my bank account] - Mafia!TF141*F!Reader
Summary: You sigh when it's the fifth time someone fights in your poor tea shop this month. You just open it two months ago, in an area ruled by mafia called '141'. Maybe you should find their boss and give them money or what to stop the bullshit keeps happening in your shop. (well, here they come)
Mafia!TF141*F!Reader, but only Soap and Ghost in this chapter unless I extend this
chapter 2
You’re just trying to fulfill your dream, plus survive with the money you earn with your shop, but you start questioning if this is a good idea, maybe you should just listen to your friend and be a 9-5 worker, sitting in front of a laptop the whole day.
This isn’t a good location to open a tea shop, your little shop will rather become a place for dealing drugs or getting extorted in the first month. The area is fully ruled by the mafia, hence the cops couldn’t do anything here, but it makes the rent extremely low, which you’re able to afford with money you saved during school, and have a tiny shop that can barely squeeze in more than 8 people.
Looking at the scene playing in your shop for the fifth time this month, you stare at the people fighting and break the cup with dead eyes. You want to shout, to kick these guys' ass out of here or hit them with your broom, yet you glance at their muscles and the knives in their hand – probably killing every day as work out, to your opposite one because you slump onto the bed once you close the shop and go upstairs, you choose to remain silent as the yelling only become louder.
Maybe you should find the mafia boss or some henchmen and give them half of your income to prevent the mayhem, but first, you don’t even know who actually rules this fucking place; second, you doubt they will have interest in your skimpy bank account. The only information you have is the mafia ruling here called ‘141’, since it’s an open secret to residents here.
“What are ye arseholes doin’?”
Fuck, here comes another one, or two as you spot the man with a balaclava behind the mohawk man who's speaking. They are tall, muscular and built like bricks. Grown like giraffes either, you complement when you need to crook your neck up to look at them stepping into your shop as if it's their backyard.
but the chaos halts immediately as you watch your ‘customers’ seem shocked with terror at the men.
You pretend you’re deaf and attempt to bury yourself in your counter. Please don’t kill me I didn’t hear a goddamn word and didn’t see you threatening them. You recite your defense as you scrub at the same tea cup till the distinct accent from the mohawk man catches you off guard that you almost drop it.
“I guess it’s already clean, lass.” A smirk appears on his face as he points at the cup.
“Wh– what do you want?”
“Calm down, jus’ want te have some tea.”
“I only have 30 pounds in my bank account.”
“We’re just sayin’ we want tea.” The taller man speaks for the first time after coming in, and it startles you but forces your brain to function at the same time.
Ah, they aren’t here for money. You finally get what they’re talking about.
“Isn’t it supposed te be a tea shop here? One cup for him, and give me a cup of coffee.”
“Oh, of course. What kind of tea would you like, Sir?” You shift slightly to meet the other man’s eyes, and you want to shiver under his cold eyes.
“Just give him whatever you recommend.”
They round over the glass scattering on the floor and take a seat closest to your counter after you nod at them.
While boiling the water, you sneak a glimpse at them, and the shape of guns covered by their clothes are unignorable as you scold yourself to stop looking at them, or the bigger guy might stab your eyes, but you still curse whole-heartedly in mind when the Scottish accent man meet your eyes with his azure ones and shines you a grin.
Should just quit staring, or you shouldn’t open this shop at all. Regretting your decisions as you turn back and focus back on making their drink, you’re able to recognize them staring at you from the periphery of your vision. Is it too late to kneel down and beg for your life right now?
You still perfectly make their orders and bring them the drinks, even though you’re sweating internally. At least don’t mess it up, and your confidence in your tea and coffee isn’t born from nothing, as you notice the man with the skull balaclava takes a sip first, then raises his eyebrow, added with a side glance at you.
“Haven’t seen him amazed by tea in years, it must be very good.” The mohawk man whistles as he sips at his coffee and gives an approving nod too.
“Thank you…” Your ego shouldn’t be boosted by mafias, but you still relax a bit knowing you didn't screwed up.
“When did ye open ‘is shop?” The man asks while the other continues drinking his tea, but seemingly taking in the conversation too.
“About two months ago."
"That’s why we didn't know about it before…” He taps at the table twice before shooting you another question “Got blokes like those in yer shop earlier often?”
Death sentence is served to your front, that’s what you think you hear. Is it better to say yes or no? Judging by the fact those people are their minions, you’re not sure if saying yes is indicating they haven’t controlled them appropriately.
“Tell us the truth”
“Yeah, it’s the fifth time this month.” Swallowing, you confirm. Lies aren’t meaningful, and surely they’re able to pierce any veil with those scrutinizing stares and keen minds.
You watch them sharing a glance, and Soap takes out a pen along with a piece of paper, and starts scribbling on it.
“Here, call this number when you run in trouble, aye?" He shoves the paper into your grasp “I’m Soap, call him Ghost.”
"It’s a nice shop, we’ll come back soon.”
Your little shop drops into peace again as your customers leave, and you gaze at the generous tip lying on your counter, to the paper in your palm.
A number is written on it, with a big badge of ‘141’ beside it.
Oh shit, so your shop just became the most far-flung mafia’s property without you knowing.
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youtube’s search function is the absolute fucking worst ever
stop throwing in ‘related’ videos from channels i frequent when i’m searching for a topic that has absolutely nothing to do with it
#and also the videos that really don’t match the search term but aren’t marked as related??#i wish you could blacklist yt channels from your search results#stop recommending me some stupid tabloid bullshit drama about a completely unrelated group when im lookin up content for a different group#shouting into the void#Ugh
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The best part of writing this wolf shifter romance is that it's shown me exactly how NOT to write a book.
#its been rough lol#but we are almost done and I think I learned my lesson#basically i have to edit as I go or else I will want to throw myself off a bridge when I have to edit 70k manuscript#I only have 5000 words to edit and then I can start....my second editing pass😢#and people actually recommend editing a whole fucking full length novel trash rough draft instead of editing as you go#I will never trust writing advice again#the absolute barbarism of that specific advice#writeblr#this is why people say their nanowrimo drafts are unsalvageable#editing as you go helps build a solid foundation for your draft#otherwise you're literally wading through bullshit and the work to fix it afterwards is so intense#but also...different strokes for different folks#like I'm sure stephen king would totally disagree with me#next book I will stop to edit after finishing each chapter or two....just like I do with fanfic
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Have YOU got an old Windows PC Microsoft has told you can't run Windows 11? It's time to give it a new life!
How to install Windows 11 on unsupported PC Hardware using Rufus. You can also disable some other Windows 11 bullshit like data harvesting and needing a Microsoft account.
It has been in the news a lot lately that Windows 11 isn't allowed to be installed on PCs without certain requirements, including the TPM 2.0, a chip that was only included in PCs made in 2018 or later. This means that once Windows 10 stops receiving security updates, those PCs will not be able to (officially) run a safe, updated version of Windows anymore. This has led to an estimated 240 million PCs bound for the landfill. Thanks Microsoft! I get you don't want to be seen as the insecure one, but creating this much waste can't be the solution.
(I know nerds, Linux is a thing. I love you but we are not having that conversation. If you want to use Linux on an old PC you are already doing it and you don't need to tell me about it. People need Windows for all sorts of reasons that Linux won't cut.)
So lately I have been helping some under privileged teens get set up with PCs. Their school was giving away their old lab computers, and these kids would usually have no chance to afford even a basic computer. They had their hard drives pulled so I have been setting them up with SSDs, but the question was, what to do about the operating system? So I looked into it and I found out there IS actually a way to bypass Microsoft's system requirement and put Windows 11 on PCs as old as 2010.
You will need:
Rufus: An open source ISO burning tool.
A Windows 11 ISO: Available from Microsoft.
A USB Flash Drive, at least 16GB.
A working PC to make the ISO, and a PC from 2018 or older you want to install Windows 11 on.
Here is the guide I used, but I will put it in my own words as well.
Download your Windows 11 ISO, and plug in your USB drive. It will be erased, so don't have anything valuable on it. Run Rufus, select your USB drive in the Device window, and select your Windows 11 ISO with the Select button. (There is supposed to be a feature in Rufus to download your ISO but I couldn't get it to work.?
Choose standard windows installation, and follow the screenshot for your settings. Once you are done that, press Start, and then the magic happens. Another window pops up allowing you to remove the system requirements, the need for a microsoft account, and turn off data collecting. Just click the options you want, and press ok to write your iso to a drive.
From there you just need to use the USB drive to install windows. I won't go into details here, but here are some resources if you don't know how to do it.
Boot your PC from a USB Drive
Install Windows 11 from USB Drive
If you had a licensed copy of Windows 10, Windows 11 will already be licensed. If you don't, then perhaps you can use some kind of... Activation Scripts for Microsoft software, that will allow you to activate them. Of course I cannot link such tools here. So there you go, now you can save a PC made from before 2018 from the landfill, and maybe give it to a deserving teen in the process. The more we can extend the lives of technology and keep it out of the trash, the better.
Additional note: This removes the requirement for having 4GB Minimum of RAM, but I think that requirement should honestly be higher. Windows 11 will be unusable slow on any system with below 8GB of RAM. 8GB is the minimum I think you should have before trying this but it still really not enough for modern use outside of light web and office work. I wouldn't recommend trying this on anything with 4GB or less. I am honestly shocked they are still selling brand new Windows 11 PCs with 4GB of ram. If you're not sure how much RAM you have, you can find out in the performance tab of Task Manager in Windows, if you click the More Details icon on the bottom right. If you don't have enough, RAM for old systems is super cheap and widely available so it would definitely be worth upgrading if you have a ram starved machine you'd like to give a new life.
#Windows#Windows 11#tech#tech advice#pc#TPM 2.0#rufus#open source#open source software#technology#tech tips
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