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drakenology · 3 years

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I Hate Everything About You - Dabi

warnings: ANGST, smut, daddy kink, mentions of rape,violence, AND swearing (cause im a potty mouth)

author’s note: this lil story is inspired by my favorite song I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace. im a lil emo bitch ok? I recommend listening to the song to get a better perspective of how the emotions of the lyrics and the story goes hand in hand. the chorus goes like “I hate everything about you. why do i love you?” and I immediately thought of something angsty and raw to write. hope yall enjoy! this one might be a little long.

summary: You and Dabi have worked together as villians for as long as you can remember but you two don’t get along at all. is this truly hatred or is this repressed feelings coming to surface?

You hated heroism. You viewed it as weak and meaningless. When both of your parents were murdered by an anonymous killer and no one came to their rescue when they could very well have been saved, something dark took over your spirit. You snapped. At the tender age of 17, your parents did not receive justice for the act of violence committed against them. The police told you there “wasn’t enough evidence” and that the killer had most likely killed himself.

There were simply too many holes in the case for it to be solved. Obviously this infuriated you. So much in fact that you planned to blow up the entire police precinct.

And you did.

Now being on the run at only 17 you fell into a life of crime, committing yourself to being a villain who killed police officers off duty earning yourself the villain name “Cop Killer” from the authorities. Not to mention your very dangerous quirk called “Leech”. You were able drain anyone you gazed at of their blood, the gaze having to be completely focused on the person’s eyes. Once concentrated enough it becomes hard for the person to look away from you. To trigger your quirk, you have to say the word “leech” in order to essentially stop the flow of someone’s blood to their heart; their blood being extracted from their veins to yours. The blood only made your quirk stronger as you can now manipulate it and use it in combat. You had enough control to where you could take a little or take it all. The stolen blood was also good for increasing your stamina and speed for a short period, manifesting a weapon with the blood you stole and of course leeching the person of their blood entirely, instantly killing them. The murders you committed granted you the number one spot of Japan’s wanted list. You were also the youngest assasin in Japan at the time so you had to move around a lot. You spent your teenage years living in abandoned buildings and sketchy motels; robbing, stealing and of course murdering for survival.

The day you met the League of Villains was your 23rd birthday. As a treat to yourself, you had cornered one of the dirtiest cops you had ever encountered. He was a known sex trafficker, a thief as well as a disgusting rapist. You had him right where you wanted him; wearing a disguise to hide your true visage in order to avoid being recognized. You had pretended to be a love interest to the cop, sitting in the seedy hotel room he rented to have a little “privacy” with you.

“Oh baby, you don’t know what you do to me. I wanna see that pretty little mouth of yours around my cock. Get on your knees for me.” The police man said, the sleazy bastard unbuckling his belt. You nod, secretly being disgusted by this man. But you had to keep your cool. You got down on your knees and took his hard cock into your hands and pumped, looking him directly in the eyes as you did so.

“Yeah, baby. You’re so hot.” He groaned, keeping his eyes locked on yours almost instinctively as sweat collected on his brow.

“Thanks.. but your time’s up, you sick fuck.” you say, standing up on your feet. You straddle him, watching the cop’s eyes become terrified as he finally realizes who you really are.

“Leech.” You say as you watched your quirk take effect. The reaction was instant as he starts to gasp and grab at his heart, clinging onto his last minutes of life as he died on the hotel bed. You moan as his blood is transferred into yours, creating a dagger out of his blood. You slice his neck, licking whatever was left off of his cold throat. You laugh, searching his dead body to take whatever he had on his person; money, personal possessions and his gun. Just as you’re about to get up and leave you get the feeling that you aren’t alone. You turn and see none other than the villain you had seen all over local news.

Shigaraki.

He chuckles dryly, admiring your work at killing the cop underneath you.

“Well done, little girl.” He said, peering over your shoulder to get a good look at the mess you made of him. You go to ask how the hell he got into the room until you hear the sound of police sirens blaring outside.

“We have the entire hotel surrounded. There are Heros on the way to assist us. Surrender now or face the consequences.” You hear the cops say on a megaphone.

“Shit.” You mumble, quickly grabbing your things; planning your escape in your head.

“Listen, I’ve admired your work since your attack on that police station, Cop Killer.” Shigaraki said. “We could use someone like you in the League of Villains. My friend Kurogiri here can get us both out of here in one piece. But only with your consent of course.”

You think for a moment. You’d rather make a smooth escape than risk being arrested. So you agree.

“We’ll explain everything once we get back to base.” Kurogiri says, morphing himself through the cracks of the door.

Kurogiri takes both you and Shigaraki and consumed you both into his portals, leading you to the secret hide-out of the League of Villains. You look around, your vision a little hazy from being in the dark portal. You see a few other people standing in the lobby. A guy with a weird mask on with two sides on it eagerly introduced himself as Twice. You see a cute girl that looked a little young to be in a place like this.

“Toga Himiko. Nice to meet ya. Hey, you’re way prettier in person. The police drawing of you is really unflattering.” She says, waving at you. You smile meekly as you turn away to see this guy standing at the corner of the bar. He had burn scars all over his face and neck, dark hair and the most mysterious eyes you’ve ever seen. You met his gaze when you noticed him staring at you, sizing you up. You found his stare threatening and kind of alluring. You almost couldn’t look away.

“Don’t stare at me for too long, Cop Killer. I know what those eyes can do.” He said sarcastically, not even caring to introduce himself. He felt familiar, like you’ve known him for a long time. You rolled your eyes and walked over to Shigaraki.

“Look, if you think just because you got me out of a tight spot that I’m just gonna beg to work for you, you’re wrong. I work alone.” You said, adjusting the top of your outfit.

“I know. But today that changes. You see, we’ve been watching you, Cop Kill-” He says, interrupted by your loud groan.

“My name is Y/N. Please just call me by my name. My mother didn’t name me Cop Killer.” You demand, folding your arms in protest.

“But that’s what you are, Y/N. Don’t be ashamed.” Shigaraki says, inching closer to you. “Look, the services of the League of Villains aren’t free. We helped you. Now you help us. You understand don’t you, Y/N?”

You sigh, wishing you had just leapt out of a nearby window back at the hotel instead of taking help from this creep.

“Fine.” You say, looking down at your shoes.

“Wonderful.” Shigaraki says, walking away from you. “Oh and one more thing. I hate back talkers.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few months pass and you’re well acquainted with all the villains of the organization. You were all usually partnered up for missions; you always alternating between Toga and Dabi, who had finally told you his “name”. You grew to be pestered by Dabi. You’d much rather be paired up with Toga than Dabi any day since you and Dabi just could not get along, you both arguing like an old married couple at every mission. You couldn’t stand him. His cockiness, his elitist attitude, his aloofness. He hated you because of your attitude, you thinking you knew better than everyone else. He thought you were a spoiled brat who hasn’t done anything remarkable to even earn a spot in the League. To you, he was everything you despised about some men.

One night you were all playing a friendly game of Blackjack; which seemed to be a ritual between the members. Shigaraki didn’t bother playing but Kurogiri always seemed to watch.

“Ugh.. Fold. What do I have to do to get a decent fucking hand, huh?” Twice said, his two voices seeming to contrast in differing personality. You laugh, slamming down a perfect hand worth 21.

“I stand, bitches.” You say, winning yet another round.

“I’m bored.” Dabi says, standing up and leaving the table.

“Oh don’t be like that, Dabi. Come back!” Toga says, throwing her cards down. She sighs and stands up from the table. “Well, I guess that’s it. I’m goin to bed. Nighty night, Y/N. Twice.” Everyone went their separate ways. You walk into your room and change into something more comfortable and walk outside to get some air. To your dismay, Dabi was already standing outside in the same spot you liked to chill and think.

“Yo.” He says, referring to you. You roll your eyes and walk over to him.

“What?” You say, annoyed to the point where you just want to turn around and go back inside.

“Aw, what’s wrong, Cop Killer? Don’t like me?” He asks, inching closer to you to whisper in your ear. You stand still for a moment and lunge at him, grabbing his throat and pushing him against the wall.

“Stop fucking testing me.” You say sternly, looking him deeply in the eyes with the intention to kill.

“Careful, little girl. You might just turn me on.” He says, grabbing your arm and pushing you back. You freeze, stunned at the sudden harsh movement from the tall man in front of you. ”You’re 5′4′’, sweetheart. If I wanted to, I could end you without even using my quirk. You ‘oughta be nicer to me.”

You get angrier by the second, yelling and screaming about how much you hate him all while trying to take jabs at him, throwing punches at his face. Dabi dodges every swing, smirking at your abilities. He was impressed, but he’d never tell you that.

“Huh. Keep it up and you might actually hit me.” He teased, swinging back at you, landing right on your jaw. You stumble and collect yourself, charging towards him once more. You were certain you’d hit him, the blood from someone you’ve killed earlier that day increasing your speed.

“Fuck you.” You hiss, taking another swing at him and connect, landing right on his cheek. He smirks, wiping blood from his mouth. You get cocky and go for another punch only for him to dodge you. He grabbed your arm and twisted it, pinning you against the brick wall in front of him with your back facing him.

“When?” He asked in your ear, sending shivers down your spine. You hated that he could so easily overpower you, making you despise him even more. He releases you from his grip and stands close to you; you feeling the warmth of his skin radiating from his body.

“Listen. You hate me and quite frankly I can’t stand you either. But you don’t see me attacking you. Try it again and I won’t be so nice next time, little girl.” Dabi said, grabbing your face to daringly look into your poisonous eyes to mock your quirk. You focus, ready to end this asshole. Suddenly his lips crash into yours. At first, you’re disgusted and fucking pissed. But then you feel yourself start involuntarily melting into his kiss. So you kiss him back with no shame, all bitter feelings leaving your mind as the kiss gets more intense. You feel his hands groping and caressing your body, his hands exploring to stop at your neck; wrapping it around. You gasp, feeling yourself get hot.

“The first time I saw you, I thought you were the hottest girl I’ve ever seen. And then you spoke. And I couldn’t stand you. But I couldn’t shake this feeling of wanting to bend you over and punish you for your slick mouth. You need a good hard dicking to keep your mouth shut and I’m the one to give it to you. That’s what you want too, isn’t it?” He asked, starting to kiss your neck harshly. You moan, embarrassed at his words. He was right. You found him attractive as soon as you saw him but his attitude rubbed you the wrong way. But right here and now, you realize that you might have been hiding your true feelings behind a façade of hatred. You wanted him too and you couldn’t stand it.

“I’m talking to you, Y/N.” He persists, biting into your neck. You mewl, shocked at how good he was making you feel. You almost couldn’t believe you were in this situation. It was confusing but formalities could come later. You wanted him now.

“Yes, Dabi. I wanted you to fuck me the first time I saw you.” You say quietly, feeling him reach under your shirt and bra to grab at your naked breast. You bit your lip, feeling slick pool between your legs as you fall victim to his touch.

“Get inside and go in my room. I expect you to have nothing on when I get there. Understood?” He demands, pinching your nipple lightly. You gasp, nodding at his request.

“Words. You’ve already made me angry with that stunt you pulled punching me in the face. I wouldn’t try me further.” He said, grabbing your hair and pulling it to expose more of your neck. You moan, unable to control yourself suddenly. It’s like he knew exactly what to do to turn you on. Fucking asshole.

“Y-Yes, daddy- I-I mean Dabi.” You flush. Damn. You couldn’t believe you let that slip. He laughs, kissing your lips once more as he lets you go.

“Daddy works just fine.” Dabi says smirking, watching you stumble towards the door to go back inside. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You knew you should just go into your own room but, God you wanted to see what he’d do to you for almost punching him. You wondered how rough he’d be, your panties soaking at the thought as you gulp and open his room door. You sat on his bed and took off your clothes, leaving your underwear on to tease him. Suddenly his door opens and it’s him. He looked you up and down, loving what he saw. But to his dismay you had on too many clothes still.

“I thought I told you to get naked, little girl.” Dabi said, pushing you onto his bed. He stood above you, running his fingers down your stomach and stopping at the waistband of your panties. You shudder at his cold fingers.

“You never said naked.” You tease, looking back at him. He frowns, shaking his head.

“Man, you just love pushing my buttons don’t you? You’re gonna regret teasing me so much.” He says, pulling your panties down roughly, holding them up to his face. He smirked at the wet spot he saw on them, throwing them onto the ground. “This is gonna be fun.”

You hiss as he slid one measly finger inside you while rubbing your bundle of nerves with his thumb, the single finger not being enough to satisfy your craving for that certain pleasurable stretch. Somehow though, Dabi was making you feel good with that one finger. You roll your hips for more friction only to have Dabi hold you down with his other hand.

“Stop squirming so much. It makes you look desperate, doll.” He teased earning a whine from you. As if to be a little forgiving he adds another finger, watching your face twist up in pleasure. You were visually trying to hide your moans, Dabi not liking that at all.

“Come on now. It’s no fun if you don’t scream for me. Let everyone here know how good I make you feel.” He said, halting his movements. You nod, moaning loudly as he adds a third finger. Any shame or embarrassment is gone as he worked you up to your first orgasm. You grab at his sheets, trying to move for more friction only to once more be overpowered by Dabi.

“You don’t listen too well do you? I said stop squirming. You’ll have your fill but good girls wait to cum. Understand? I expect you to address me correctly this time.” He says, grabbing your face to make you look at him. Something about knowing you could kill him with your eyes turned him on, because he knew he could keep you from doing so. All he had to do was please you, knowing you won’t be able to focus on anything but screaming his name let alone his eyes.

“Y-Yes daddy.” You mewl, your eyes rolling back as he pulled out one of your breasts, sucking on your nipple harshly. The sound of your moans was music to Dabi’s ears, the only thing he ever wanted to hear come out of your mouth. He cooed praises into your ear, telling you hot sexy you are and how et your pussy is just for him. He crawls on top of you, pulling his fingers out of you as you whine at the sudden loss. He kissed you, ripping your bra off. He sat up and stared at the gorgeous naked woman underneath him.

“You’re so hot when you’re not talking shit.” He says, playing with your boobs. He was unsure of where to start. He wanted to please every inch of your lovely curves, his eyes drinking in your hips up to your beautiful breasts. He nearly drooled at the sight of them, your nipples seeming to perk up when he looked at them. You stare back at the man on top of you, his scars almost complimenting his skin as you watched him take off his shirt. You bit your lip as you feel a nice sized bulge grind up against your dripping core. You didn’t even notice that his pants were off, drooling at the sight of his body overpowering yours. He grinded up against you, leaning in close to your ear.

“Ready to get fucked, sweetheart?” He asked, nibbling on your ear lobe.

“Yes, god, yes!” You gasp, feeling him take off his boxers. He positioned his dick at your entrance, tapping it against you to tease you. You moan, going to grab his cock and shove it inside you but you think twice, already in trouble with him. Dabi smirks, excited to break you as he shoved himself inside you and started to rut his hips into you. You moan sinfully at the sudden stretch, loving how he filled you. You feel him speed up, not even fully adjusted to his length as you clawed at his back for dear life.

“You’re takin me so well, doll.” He said, grabbing your neck to lightly choke you. Your eyes roll back as you reveal a sinful ahegao face while he pounds you senseless. You’re moaning his name and telling him how good he feels inside you, cussing and screaming into the air as you feel yourself coming close to cumming.

“C-Can I-?” You ask, unable to finish your sentence as you feel yourself clenching around him. Dabi is relentlessly prodding at your g-spot, causing you to see stars as he notices he’s hitting that special spot. He smirks and angles himself so that he’s repeatedly hitting that spot, watching you cover your mouth as you scream. He snatched your hand away from your mouth and pinned it above your head.

“Tell me you’re sorry for punching me, kitten.” He demands, harshly pinching your nipples. You shake your head no to tease him. “No? Must need more convincing, huh brat?” He pulls out of you, you letting out a pathetic sob at the loss. He roughly flips you on your stomach and plants a hard smack on your ass. You yelp, your pussy aggravated as it throbs at the feeling of pleasure. He yanks you towards him and shoves himself back inside you, you laying flat on your stomach. You kick and scream under him, feeling him so deep it blinds you.

“Oh my god, daddy!” You whine, shoving your face into your pillow as he assaults your g-spot.

“Say it.” He demands, landing another hard smack on your ass this one sure to leave a mark.

“I-I’m sorry! Fuck, I’m sorry!” You scream, desperate for release.

“Good girl.” He hisses. Dabi grabs your hair and lifts your head off the pillow wanting to hear the last moans you can give before you cum.

“Go ‘head and cum for me. You’ve earned it.” He says. And just like that you clench around him hard, your orgasm washing over your body as you cum all over his dick. He rides out your orgasm, only to continue pounding you earning a sharp yelp from you as you throw your head into the pillow again.

“You didn’t think it was over did you? That’s cute.” He said, taking you further. At this point you’re overstimulated, the pleasure almost painful as he worked you to another orgasm.

“God, I love you!” You scream to his delight as you cum quicker than your mind can keep up.

“I love you too. Even though you’re fucking annoying.” He hisses, unable to hold himself back anymore. He cums hot inside you, grunting as he slaps your ass one last time before pulling himself out. You moan softly, breathing heavily as he cleaned you up. He kissed up your body, you unable to move from being completely fucked out of your mind.

“When you socked me, I knew you were a keeper.” He laughed.

“Shut up.” You say, smiling into your pillow.

“HEY, YOU TWO DONE IN THERE? YOU COULD HAVE WOKEN UP THE ENITRE CITY WITH ALL THAT RACKET!” Twice shouted through the walls, turning your face red with shame.

“SHUT UP AND MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS!” Dabi yelled back, rubbing soft circles on your ass to soothe his harsh marks on both cheeks.

bitch i.. i’m sick.

#bnha smut #bnha fanfiction #bnha dabi #bnha x reader #bnha imagines #bnha shouta aizawa #bnha bakugo x reader #bnha midoriya x reader #bnha todoroki x reader #bnha oc

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galacticlamps · 3 years

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im sorry im sorry im sorry i know it’s been well over a year but i accidentally thought about Short Trips: Deleted Scenes (again) and it’s killing me (again) so i think im just gonna go ahead and post all these stupid thoughts that have been plaguing me about it since i first heard it & maybe that’ll help clear up some space in my head for like, real life things.

Spoilers I guess? It’s like a year and a half old but also high key the most recent 2nd doctor content i believe we’ve gotten which is like, the only negative thing I can say about it

The TLDR version is this:

I literally cant believe how sweet it is? Painful, but sweet. Like. I don’t honestly know what’s more likely - did they set out to write Jamie a nice little straight love interest and just fail miserably at it by constantly likening her to the Doctor AND paralleling the Doctor’s perspective with her ex’s AND putting Jamie’s relationships with both of them in direct tension with each other while constantly letting his with the Doctor win out?

OR - did they do a very 1960s thing and say hey we’re gonna write what’s essentially a story about how much Jamie and the Doctor love each other and release it on Valentine’s Day thinly disguised as a one-off romance with a french lady?

Now, as a general rule, my attitude toward questions like that is usually “don’t know, don’t care, doesn’t matter” - and while I 100% stand by that, I also have to admit that this particular audio seems to pay enough attention to detail that I’d kind of think I was selling it short if I assumed too many of these things were just meaningless coincidences, you know?

Anyway, that’s the most coherent/overarching thought. And here’s a disorganized list of things I absolutely cannot get over about it (they don’t form any kind of argument, mind, they just all happen to live rent free in my head):

- Celine is first taken in by Jamie being an idiot (specifically him claiming not to speak French, in perfect French); likewise, her entrance in the scene where they actually kiss is marked with a little anecdote about her hat getting stuck on a doornail and her scolding it as she attempts to fix her un-tameable appearance, and the narration says Celine “would often clown for Jamie like this” - all of which, while undeniably adorable, don’t exactly strike me as entirely original traits to have been assigned to Jamie’s love-interest (but also Celine is so cool and her perspective on film/media/time is an excellent addition to the long list of dr who characters)

- When they’re in the present, describing Jamie’s relationship with Celine in 1908, they call him her “companion” and highlight his going nearly everywhere with her, which earns a laugh from the 4th doctor (and me as well, though probably for slightly different reasons - but like, is that really all it takes to have a fling with someone in 60′s era who? bc if so...)

- Celine’s ex-fiance is still in love with her and is jealously watching when she kisses Jamie ... and then the Doctor appears beside him, evidently doing the exact. same. thing. They have the following conversation:

“You know, it’s not prudent to spy on people. But then, people in pain can’t be expected to act prudently.”

“Pain, monsieur? You mistake me.”

“Ah, do I? Good, because I rather thought you’d lost something.”

“What would you know about loss monsieur?”

- I’m sorry doc but who do you think you are, saying stuff like that and smiling sadly at the floor to boot? I 100% had to pause it here the first time I listened, just to not throw my laptop across the room.

- Then when I recovered continued, the Doctor closes the door so they can’t watch anymore and explains “Possessing things comes so terribly easily to some men that losing them can feel cruel, intolerably cruel. In my experience, only the very best of men cannot be tempted to answer that cruelty with more - I do sincerely hope that you are the best of men.” (guess who gets described as the best of men by the end of the audio?)

- Jamie and the Doctor apparently develop a habit of walking along the river in Paris in silence

- During one such walk, Jamie suggests Celine come with them since she already figured out about the Tardis - and when the Doctor’s worried by this, he says he only allowed Jamie & Celine to grow closer “because of Victoria.” Jamie takes offense at the ‘allowing it’ comment and also refuses to admit he knows what the Doctor means about Victoria, which leads the Doctor to say that he knows how fond Jamie was of her - he was too, of course, but with him, “it was different, wasn’t it?” Jamie only says maybe that’s true and maybe that’s not, but his voice catches until he changes the subject

- Jamie doesn’t see Celine for days both times that she’s recovering from the shock and depression of her work being destroyed. In contrast, when the Doctor’s not well, Jamie’s "afraid” and “guilty” and hardly seems to leave his side at all, if his being there “rushing to embrace him” the second he wakes up - after a period Jamie describes as “at least a week” - is anything to go by, anyway. so either bf writers need to learn how to write a committed straight relationship or admit that’s not what they ever intended in the first place

- Oh yeah, and the Doctor spends that week "asleep” in Jamie’s bedroom - no, there’s no explanation as to if that’s where he was when he first collapsed or if it’s where Jamie decided to take him bc why would they feel the need to explain him being there? why was it even relevant to tell us it was Jamie’s room in the first place?

- The Doctor somehow manages to control the Tardis enough to take Celine on one trip to an alien planet and then return to the correct time & place for her to use the footage she recorded there in her new film - and while the audio doesn’t do very much to explain how that was possible, it does treat this as A Pretty Big Deal, and immediately afterward the Doctor has to spend a week communing with his past self (and/or the Tardis?) debating how likely it is that the Time Lords could use this to trace him. When he decides it’s not worth the risk and they have to stop the film from ever being shown to the public, Jamie asks why he agreed to it in the first place, and all he can say is “Because, Jamie, you asked me to!” earning awkward stares from the crowd.

- Oh, but, lest we forget, that little outburst is also immediately followed by him putting his arm around Jamie’s shoulders, and, shockingly, apparently beginning to actually explain the truth about the danger from the Time Lords - until they’re interrupted, of course idk why exactly but the idea of a 60s dr wanting to come clean with a companion but not being allowed to bc the show demands the war games be something of a reveal hurts me in a very good way

- The mental image of “the Doctor and Jamie, resplendent in borrowed evening wear”

- The audio admitting that Jamie’s not very good at subterfuge, and the Doctor asking if he’s going to be alright with them having to steal the film back from Celine - and Jamie’s little “Aye, Doctor” as he feels a ‘glass arrow piercing his chest’ glad to see bf is reading all my letters about exactly how i feel any time something sad happens to james robert mccrimmon

- The Doctor’s anxious to get out of there for obvious reasons, but he hangs around bc Jamie wants to see Celine again - which doesn’t happen, because of her aforementioned shock & depression, but she does leave Jamie a note that ends “you and that Doctor of yours - look after him Jamie, he loves you dearly, as do I.” yeah, if you didn’t want people to draw a parallel there, you could’ve picked, like, any other wording in the world.

- In case you weren’t fully convinced I’ve been reading too much into this whole audio already, consider this: Celine dies in Long Island in 1968, three days before her birthday - 1968 is when this story would’ve taken place in the show’s history (between Fury & Wheel), and dying three days before/after a birthday in America seems a bit... well I had some deja vu from it, anyway

- Four of all people being the one to bring back the film - I know he does it bc Sarah Jane makes him, but personally, I often feel like despite the length of his run, 4 is the Doctor with which we might’ve gotten the fewest glimpses into his interiority, so the fact that it’s him and not one of the more overtly sentimental Doctors makes it feel like it carries even more weight somehow, to me anyway. I think I wrote a post saying roughly the same thing about 4 & Fate of Krelos/Return to Telos but maybe I only did that inside my own head lol. Still, I’m all for any opportunities for Jamie to be one of the few characters to draw some noticeable emotion out of Four, but in fairness I haven’t touched too much of his EU stuff to really be able to compare the frequency with which this happens with other past companions

- Is Four referring to Two or Jamie when he says he got the film from “an old family friend”? Two did the actual stealing, but he probably means Jamie’s involvement - either way, it’s an interesting way of describing old companions - or selves?

- When Jemima goes to call Jamie a thief, Four is “roused” to defend him: “he really was the very best of men” again, any time four freely shows he cares about someone, im over the moon about it

- Oh ha ha, there’s an audio called “Deleted Scenes” featuring the Doctor who’s most affected by junked episodes. And at the end of it, a character who’s spent her life researching and lecturing about a lost film gets to watch it be ‘rediscovered’ after it’s gone unseen for decades. I feel marginally less stupid for reading into the other details of a story like this when it ends up deciding to be to be clever & slightly meta like that

But yeah

all in all, it’s kind of amazing to me that this genuinely reads like they sat down and said okay boys it’s valentines day, let’s write an audio where jamie kisses a girl, since that hasn’t happened except as a plot device in one story in 1967 - but then when they got down to business they accidentally(?) wrote a story all about how important his bond with the Doctor is and how easily that can be compared to a legitimate love interest (even if the love interest in question is a one off character & the extent of the relationship appears to be like one kiss & then having Jamie spend most of his time around the Doctor instead)

I realize there’s something slightly illogical about writing the words “shipping aside” after a post like this but seriously - no matter how many categories you’re able to see two & jamie’s relationship fitting into, this is 40 minutes of big finish just hitting you over the head with how powerful/special/important that relationship is, and with them being two of my favorite characters, i really haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since

#jamie mccrimmon #second doctor #big finish #Short Trips: Deleted Scenes #yes i am gonna tag this #two/jamie #i think it earned it with the line from celine's letter if nothing else #and quite possibly the doctor's so-called imprudent & pain-driven spying #but i'll leave it at that #in case anyone's looking at the tags to decide if they should actually read this rambling monster of a post #also if you for some reason read this but haven't listened to the audio -#a) that's kind of you to care what i have to say but #b) you could probably have listened to half of it by now lol #did i mention it's a stand-alone audio that only costs $3?#and it's more of a traditional audio book format with one narrator who voices all the characters?#sorry i wasn't ready to do a bf pitch in the tags here #i genuinely dont know why someone who hasn't already heard it would bother to read all this #but if anyone has - thanks?#i'll shut up now so you can get on w ur day :)

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love-killed-the-superstar · 4 years

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yo im back at it again, this time for cassunzel week!! these ficlets will all take place in the same fic-verse as my cass week fics, which you can read here!

CASSUNZEL WEEK DAY 1 - HOMECOMING

On the day of her 22nd birthday, Rapunzel is radiant.

She must have known the surprise party was coming – how could she not, what with the whole of Corona buzzing with anticipation? – but still, she shrieks with delight all the same as the room erupts with cheer. She’s changed a little since the last time Cass saw her; her eyes sparkle a little brighter, her shoulders are less tense. Her happily ever after was only just beginning with Cassandra’s departure, but now – now she’s truly at peace.

Despite her initial decision to join Eugene and Lance at the front of the room in order to greet Rapunzel, Cass finds herself looking for a place to hide. Part of her doesn’t want Rapunzel to notice her right here and now, with the whole of the kingdom watching. She’s excited to greet her, of course, and give her a hug (maybe more, if her nerves cooperate), but… she just doesn’t know how to act with everybody else there. The new nature of their relationship isn’t exactly public knowledge, after all, and the last thing she wants is to cause some sort of uproar on Rapunzel’s birthday of all days.

So she hangs back, for once grateful at how tall and broad Lance is in comparison to her. Rapunzel begins to gush about the decorations, running over to hug her parents tightly, before making her way over to Eugene to give him the hug and kiss he’s earned for being such an efficient party planner.

“Well, I can’t take all the credit, sunshine,” he rambles, looking all too pleased with himself. “Everyone helped make this place a success. Oh, but I can take credit for keeping a certain someone – pardon the pun – under wraps…”

Cass considers leaving him hanging, but the second-hand embarrassment would be too much, even with Eugene getting the brunt of it. So she awkwardly side-steps out from behind Lance and gives a sheepish wave. Rapunzel’s face, set in confusion at Eugene’s awkward trail-off, morphs into one of pure amazement as her eyes meet Cassandra’s.

“CASS!!” She launches herself at Cassandra at full speed, leaving her winded from the impact.

“Oof. Hey, Raps. Ha, long time no see.”

Rapunzel’s arms wind round her tightly, scooping her further into the hug, and Cass returns it a little stiffly, glancing around as the rest of the party watch on in amusement. Lance is grinning like a fool, issuing a double thumbs-up, while Eugene simply offers a lopsided grin and a nod that she’s guessing he’s trying to equate to a sense of approval. The queen’s lips quirk up into a mile, but otherwise gives nothing away, while the king clears his throat and stares at the floor.

“Eugene said you couldn’t make it!” Rapunzel cries. “He said you were probably scaling a mountain or sailing between kingdoms or dodging a bounty hunter!”

“Oh, did he now? Dodging a bounty hunter, Fitzherbert, really? Unlike you, I don’t make enemies everywhere I go.”

“With your delightful personality, that genuinely surprises me,” he retorts, grinning all the same.

Ignoring him, she turns her attention back to Raps and pulls away to face her. “Well, regardless, I’m here now . Happy birthday, Rapunzel.”

Rapunzel reaches for her hands, entwining them, and for a moment Cass feels a horrific sense of deja vu – standing in the moonstone’s chamber, Rapunzel’s hair a swaying golden beacon, their fingers laced and faces close, such a tender moment and all the while, intense betrayal and anguish and hatred is tearing through her, clawing to get out–

But this isn’t then, this is now. And she is beautiful.

Rapunzel beams at Cass, but there’s a flicker of recognition in her eyes that roots them to the spot, just for a moment. She feels it too, Cass realises with a sinking feeling.

But in an act so defiant, as though to challenge the power of that awful memory, Rapunzel draws Cassandra’s gloved hands up to her lips and kisses them, just for a moment. Cass is pretty sure she can hear the king’s jaw drop in disbelief, but she’s far too shocked herself to glance over at him to confirm that. Rapunzel, oblivious to the surprise of those around her, quickly drops their hands and slings an arm around Cass’s shoulder, grinning from ear to ear as she turns to address the crowd.

“Thank you all so much for coming, and for celebrating my birthday on this fine day! Now,” she says brightly, “shall we let the celebration begin?”

From over the resounding cheer of the crowd, Cass hears Eugene burst out laughing behind them.

…

As far as Coronan celebrations go (of which there are far too many to commit to memory, in Cassandra’s opinion), this is one of the more enjoyable ones. The king and queen’s birthday festivities are usually more of a formal affair - there’s typically a banquet held within the castle and a more general celebration held in the courtyard for the public. Rapunzel, ever the fan of blurring the lines, has managed to merge the two somehow. The end result is an enormous buffet-style spread, two dance floors accompanied with separate musicians (one in the throne room they were decorating earlier with a formal string quartet, and one outside in the courtyard with a rowdier folk band that often performs at The Snuggly Duckling), and a whole lot of chaos.

Well, at least there are no gophers to chase after.

Cass, for the most part, has been hanging around the edges of the throne room to keep a low profile. People have been side-eyeing her all afternoon, though whether it's from the affectionate interaction with Rapunzel earlier or the whole former-enemy-of-the-kingdom thing remains to be seen. Either way, it’s better to avoid engaging with people when possible. Out in the courtyard, Rapunzel and Lance are caught up in some complicated jig of sorts, light on their feet and faces flushed with exertion as they dominate the dance floor. This gives Eugene the perfect opportunity to side up to her, a spare tumbler of punch in his hand. Pascal rests on his shoulder, watching Rapunzel’s dance in a similar trance.

“Thirsty?” he prompts, holding it out to her. She takes the drink from him and utters, “Parched, just from watching them.”

He laughs, and leans against the wall. “So, are you glad to be back?”

“Sure. I mean, I’ve missed it all, more than I thought I would. But…”

“But let me guess, you mostly came back for Rapunzel?” he finishes. “And now you’re pissed because you’ve barely spent a minute with her since the PDA fiasco that sent you scuttling right into the corner?”

The accuracy stings, it truly does. She goes to protest, but both Eugene and Pascal fix her with knowing looks. Cass hangs her head with a deep sigh.

“That obvious, huh?”

“Well yeah, everyone knows that Rapunzel is your favourite person in the world,” he says with a shrug. “And I know public affection isn’t your thing, at all. Here, hold this for me.”

He holds out his own cup for her and she takes it, eyeing him dubiously as he reaches for a small silver flask in his jacket pocket. He sprinkles a few drops into his drink.

“It all just took me by surprise, that’s all.” Cass sips at her drink gloomily and hands his cup back to him. “I didn’t hate it.”

“Still, here you are. Miserable in the face of festivities as always,” Eugene sighs, nudging her with his elbow in amusement. He takes a sip of his seasoned drink, smacking his lips in satisfaction. Still perched on his shoulder, Pascal shakes his head in exasperation. “Whoo, that’s better. You know what that punch bowl needs? Some rum in it. You want some?”

“I’ll pass, thanks.”

She rolls her eyes at him, but tones down the aggression. After all, he’s right; why did she even bother to come back for Rapunzel’s birthday, if she’s just going to bring the mood down?

“I’ll… try harder not to be such a downer,” she offers.

“How noble of you. You know, you should just tell Rapunzel you want some time alone with her, she won’t exactly turn that offer down,” he points out.

“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not going to pull her away from the party, she’s having fun .”

“She has fun with you .” As the song comes to an end, leaving Rapunzel being dramatically dipped by Lance, she catches Eugene’s eye from across the floor and waves. He waves back, before beckoning her over.

“Don’t,” Cass warns. Predictably, he ignores her.

“Hey! What’s up, guys?” Rapunzel asks breathlessly as she bounds over. “Did you see our dance? Lance is a natural, who knew?”

“It was something, all right,” Cass begins, draining the last of her drink and setting it aside.

“Yeah, it was great! But listen, sunshine. Your girlfriend here,” Eugene says matter-of-factly, jerking his thumb towards her, “who has travelled many miles to be here today, is lonely. Now, you’ve danced with me and Lance and your parents and it’s been great, but our girl Cass here is more of the wallflower type, so why don’t you two find somewhere private and catch up, huh?”

“Eugene!” snaps Cass, mortified.

“Sorry, Cass!” Rapunzel apologises immediately, reaching for her hand. “I didn’t realise, I got so swept up in all the dancing and cheer-”

“Rapunzel, it’s fine,” Cass interrupts. “More than fine. It’s your birthday, you should spend it however you want!”

“Sure, but… if we’re being honest with each other, Cass, I would like some time with you,” Rapunzel admits, squeezing Cassandra’s hand. Cass squeezes back, before quickly dropping it. “I mean, since we can’t be all… you know, ourselves in public at this point.”

Guilt stakes Cass through the heart at that. She shouldn’t have let go so fast.

“Yeah. I’m sorry, Raps, it’s just still a bit-”

“Hey, no, only happy stuff today, please!” Eugene intervenes. He claps a hand on both their backs and begins steering them towards the back exit of the throne room. “Now, I think you two should duck out now, find a quiet place away from the chaos down here. Go talk. Give presents. Make out if you want, I don’t care. The frog and I can hold down the fort. Oh, but we’re setting off the lanterns in an hour, so don’t stay too long, okay? All right, have fun!”

And with that, the door swings shut behind them, leaving the two of them alone.

…

Eugene did them a favour, really. Cass will have to thank him later.

Walking through the empty castle walls in silence, they eventually find themselves climbing the small tower overlooking the training grounds; a spot they’ve spent countless afternoons in before, idly watching the soldiers train. Cass would silently watch on while pouring tea or adjusting a tray of watercolour paints, envying each and every one of them, all while pretending not to feel Rapunzel’s wistful eyes burning holes into her from behind. This time, after opening the trap door and helping her up, she holds Rapunzel’s gaze with equal yearning. God, it’s been far too long since she’s had Rapunzel all to herself.

The first thing they do, after the trap door slams shut, is kiss. It’s quick, and Cass still finds herself glancing around furtively in case of any curious onlookers, but they’re blissfully alone besides from one soldier posted at the edge of the grounds.

“He’s too far away to see anything,” Rapunzel remarks, already able to read Cassandra’s thoughts perfectly. “Now, can I kiss you again?”

The impatience in her voice sends a giggle rippling through Cass, and she nods, reaching for Rapunzel's waist and pulling her in for a second kiss; one that she can almost feel her smiling through. Fuck, she's missed this.

“So,” she says, leaning back against the wall as Rapunzel stands giggling before her, “good birthday, Raps?”

“Best birthday!” she declares sunnily.

“Oh, really? Best birthday? Better than escaping the tower and reuniting with your long-lost family?”

Rapunzel stops, and hums in thought. “Okay, fine, you’re right. Second best birthday.”

“That’s more like it.” Cass turns to stare out at the twilight sky ahead. “It’s a beautiful day for a birthday, Rapunzel, I have to say.”

“Isn’t it just?” Rapunzel sighs, scooting up beside her. “Every year I used to look out the window of the tower and stare at a sky like this. Even though I knew the lanterns set off at nightfall, I would just sit and watch the sky grow pinker and darker in anticipation for it. Even now, I have this… this jittery feeling in my chest.”

“Brings back some mixed emotions, huh?”

Rapunzel nods, her smile falling slightly. “It feels like a whole lifetime ago. I suppose it is now. Hey, what were my birthdays like for you, before I was here?”

Cass shrugs. “Castle life largely went on as normal, I guess. Your parents were sad, of course, so there was this air of mourning in the palace, even though the townspeople treated it more as a celebration of your life and the hope of your return. We would leave little messages inside each lantern, it was kind of a custom everyone followed.”

“Did you write me lanterns?” Rapunzel asks, turning to her with raised eyebrows.

“Everybody did, it’s not a big deal,” Cass starts, feeling the beginnings of a blush creeping in as she remembers the kind of things she used to write. “You remember all the lanterns we found on Terapi Island.”

“Yeah, but I never thought to look for yours! Do you remember the kind of things you wrote?” she probes, grinning from ear to ear. “Come on, Cass, tell me! It’s my birthday, you have to!”

Rapunzel bears those big eyes, ones Cass used to be able to say no to, and she curses that Rapunzel’s love has made her so soft inside.

“Fine. Ugh. Um, let’s see, I used to… okay, now don’t laugh.”

“I won’t!” Rapunzel promises, hand on heart, although her eyes are already beginning to crinkle in anticipation.

“You’d better not! Um. Okay, so when I was younger I had this… this dumb idea that maybe when I was older and stronger I could like – rescue you. Me and Max or Fidella would go on a lone journey, searching the lands far and wide for the lost princess, and we’d bring you home and I would, you know… be promoted to the guard.”

She cringes at the very fantasy her young mind used to entertain as Rapunzel squeals beside her.

“Oh, Cass! That’s just-”

“You said you wouldn’t laugh,” Cass reminds her with a grumble, burying her head in her hands.

“I’m not laughing , it’s just so sweet! You really wanted to bring me home?”

“Yeah. For a time. As I grew older and I was stuck doing maid duties, I kind of gave up on that particular dream, but then one day… there you were. And our lives got all mixed up after the fact.”

Rapunzel reaches over to rest her hand atop Cassandra’s, squeezing lightly.

“I’m glad they did. I don’t know what my life would be like without you, Cass, but I don’t regret it.”

“It wouldn’t be so bad,” Cass says wryly. “You’d still have Eugene.”

“I couldn’t picture my life without either of you,” Rapunzel insists. “Don’t act like you aren’t both equally important to me.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Cass reaches with her free hand to fish around in her pocket. “Hey, Rapunzel. Close your eyes.”

“Oh, okay.” She twists her face towards Cass and shuts her eyes, before pursing her lips expectantly. Cass rolls her eyes fondly.

“Okay, hotshot, not what I was going for. Hold out your hand.”

“Can I still get a kiss though?”

“Later. Hand, now.”

Cass takes out the bracelets she fashioned this morning from the blue stones of the lagoon and carefully fastens one around Rapunzel’s outstretched wrist. They’re nothing too special to look at, honestly; a little clumsier than the ones that Rapunzel originally made, for sure. The gesture will surely make up for it, though.

Rapunzel’s eyes open, and she gasps.

“You remade our lagoon bracelets?!” Rapunzel’s eyes are alight with amazement. “But you hate making jewellery!”

Cass shrugs. She isn’t about to go into detail about what a pain in the ass it was to thread the bracelets, and the number of times she stabbed her fingers in the process. She’d thanked the stars for her gloves being so sturdy. “Ehh. I hate making jewellery most of the time. I can make an exception when it comes to you.”

“Cass, they’re beautiful! I don’t know what to say!” Rapunzel hugs her tightly, pressing several kisses to her cheek when she pulls back again. “But I thought you said they should be returned to sacred ground?”

“Well, yeah, I did, but I’ve, um… I’ve actually been studying a little Saporian on the road,” Cass admits sheepishly. “A bit of language, a bit of the history. Just to pass the time on rainy days when it’s hard to travel, you know? Anyway, I found a history book that spoke of Herz Der Sonne and General Champanier. Did you know, they each wore matching pendants until the day they died? Matching blue pendants, the historians say.”

“The lagoon stones,” breathes Rapunzel. Cass nods.

“They were most likely buried in them, so I reckon we may never know for sure, but…” Cass bows her head to avoid Rapunzel’s eyes as she adds, “Since the lagoon was where they fell in love, it’s understandable that the blue stones were significant to them.”

“Just like they’re significant to us.” Rapunzel’s voice is soft, barely above a whisper, and full of awe. Cass swallows and nods.

“I… I thought, if the people who discovered this lagoon allowed themselves to take mementos without the world ending…”

Rapunzel’s hands find hers in the fast-fading light, winding tightly together.

“I will treasure this, Cassandra, for the rest of my days. Hey, maybe we can get buried wearing these too?” Her voice is light, teasing, but beneath that airy joke is something a little more… personal. Permanent. It makes Cass’s heart soar.

Rapunzel leans in and kisses her softly. “I love them. I love you .”

Cass melts a little, at that. “Oh. Oh, I… Yeah. Me too.”

“Here, give me the bracelet.” Rapunzel takes the other bracelet from Cassandra’s outstretched hand and ties it around her wrist. “Now, maybe it’s not the most practical thing to wear it over the glove, but it’ll be fine for tonight. Here, now we match!”

They hold their arms up against the glare of the rapidly setting sun, watching the light gleam through the stones. They glitter like they do beneath the waves of the lagoon, if only temporarily.

“You know… You feel different now, Cass.”

Cass cocks her head to the side, trying to work out what exactly Rapunzel means by that statement as she watches dreamily as the sun disappears below the highest turrets of the castle, distorting the colour of the grounds below. Has she picked up some kind of accent on the road that makes her sound off to native Coronans? Have the facial scars distorted her appearance too much? Is she acting haughty, aloof, more so than before thanks to her time on the road?

“I’m different?” Cass prompts.

“Not in a bad way,” Raps laughs, eyes crinkling with her smile. Her gaze roams over Cass, fully taking her in, before she adds on decidedly, “It’s just the way you are now. I don’t think I could describe it fully, but the life in you, it’s so different to how you were when… when you were at your lowest. It makes me proud of the person you’ve become.”

Cass is stunned. It’s not that she didn’t expect Rapunzel to comment on this; no, she knew she would be praised in some form, because Rapunzel simply can’t help trying to uplift people whenever she can. But she hadn’t prepared for Rapunzel to cut to the heart of the matter so quickly. It’s foolish, she knows, to think that Raps wouldn’t be able to see the effort Cass has taken to become this new version of herself. It’s an image she can’t always keep up, but it’s something she has worked hard towards before feeling ready to show her face around here again.

Rapunzel being proud of her is, shockingly, the remedy that she’s craved since the moment she stepped through the gates.

“You think I’m different now?” Cass bleats uselessly, unable to stop that goofy smile from creeping in. Rapunzel grins and leans over, pecking her forehead quickly before retreating.

“I think you’re getting closer to your authentic self. And it makes me really love you.”

Cass laughs nervously, swivelling away to watch over the field down below so that hopefully Rapunzel can’t see just how flushed she’s become.

As they lapse into a comfortable silence, the rumble of footsteps begin to flood the corridors leading out onto the training pitch. Cass strains her eyes and realises, as light fills each corner of the grounds, that all of the partygoers are congregating onto the pitch below, each holding a lit paper lantern.

“So this is where they’re setting them off,” Rapunzel remarks. “We’ve been caught out. Just our luck.”

“Well, Fitzherbert could have been more specific,” grumbles Cass, without any real venom in her tone. After all, she still owes him one for pushing the two of them into some alone time in the first place. “I guess we should head down and join them.”

“I suppose,” Rapunzel says, almost sounding disappointed at having to cut their time short. “Hey, did you make a lantern this time?”

“Of course. It’s nothing fancy, though. You know that artsy stuff isn’t really my strong suit.”

“I don’t know, Cass. You did make us these bracelets, after all…”

Rapunzel, glancing between the slowly gathering crowd and Cassandra’s face, makes a split-second decision and kisses her cheek once more, before crouching down to pull the door hatch open. Damn, what Cass wouldn’t give for this to be a boat they could undock from the walls of Corona and sail off into the night, away from all these prying eyes. Anything to squeeze a few extra minutes out of this situation.

Fiddling with her hands, she pipes up, “...I could say the same about you, you know.”

Rapunzel pulls the hatch open and cranes her neck to look back at her, brow furrowed in confusion.

“What’s that?”

“About being different now? You’re growing into yourself too,” Cass continues, moving to sit down on the floor, away from the curious view of the gathering crowd below. “I remember how terrified you were at the prospect of running a kingdom, but just look at all this! Seems to me that you’ve really come into your own since I’ve been gone.”

Rapunzel sits back beside her, face glowing at Cassandra’s compliment.

“Well, I love this place! And now that the magic, sundrop, saving the world destiny is behind us, I have more time to focus on this destiny instead. Turns out, it suits me more than I ever believed it would.”

“I haven’t seen Corona this happy and at peace in a long time. Whatever Rapunzel Positivity you’ve been spreading to the people, it’s working.”

“Hopefully it’ll stay this way for a little while longer.” She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and peeks over at her, meadow-green eyes bearing into hers. “I’m so glad you came back, Cass.”

“I’m glad too. You really believed I wouldn’t fight tooth and nail to come back for your birthday?”

“I didn’t know how far away you might be!” Rapunzel points out. “If you were all the way across the continent I wouldn’t expect you to make it back in time, and you haven’t written to me in weeks!”

“Because I was travelling!”

“Well, I’d still like to know next time!” Rapunzel takes a playful swing at her arm and Cass dodges, unable to hold back her laughter any longer. It doesn’t take long for Rapunzel to follow suit, their heads resting together as they giggle in the semi-darkness. When at last they’ve run out of steam, Rapunzel peeks over the rim of the tower.

“I see Eugene. Looks like he’s holding an extra lantern.”

“Probably mine,” Cass offers. “Since everybody else is accounted for but us.”

“Guess that’s our cue to head down there, then.” Rapunzel begins to climb down the ladder, before stopping, just as her head pokes out the top of the door. “So, did you write a poem in yours, or…”

“I’m not telling you!” Cass insists, poking her nose with a grin. “If you’re lucky I’ll let you squint at it through the paper before we set them off.”

“Well, is it romantic?” Rapunzel probes. Cass smiles inwardly as she recalls the words she wrote for Rapunzel, short and sweet, knowing that they’ll wind up on Terapi Island with no one to read them but the lorbs.

I love you, Raps. And for as long as the sun shines, I will never stop.

“...Maybe.” Lowering her voice to a whisper, Cass adds conspiratorially, “But you can’t tell anybody.”

Rapunzel mimes sealing her lips. “It goes to the grave,” she says seriously. “Now. One more kiss before we go?”

Rolling her eyes, Cass leans down to bridge the gap.

#cassunzel week #cassunzel week 2020 #tangled the series #tts #writing #cassunzel #uknighted dream

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scnnyfm-old · 4 years

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chicago’s very own sunshine ‘sunny’ carmichael has been spotted on madison avenue driving a bmw 3 series , welcome ! your resemblance to dua lipa is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty-third birthday bash . your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re sensitive , but being altrustic might help you . i think being a cancer explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be the scent of bubblegum, an abundance of house plants, and freshly baked cookies . ( cis female + she/her )

helloooooo ghouls, goblins, and everything in between. it’s ya girl aneesa or whatever fun nickname you wanna call me, and this is my child sunny! you can reach me via ims or catch me on discord at 𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐬𝐚 🦋☀#5408

* && 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐬

full name — sunshine carhmichael

nicknames — sunny (preferred name actually)

birthday — july 15

height — 5′ 8″

age — twenty-three (23)

pronouns — she/her/hers

occupation(s) — singer, record executive, fashion/cosmetics brand ceo, fashion designer, reality show star, & model

languages spoken — english (barely)

orientation — bisexual

* && 𝐛𝐢𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎ 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑺𝑻𝑶𝑹𝒀 𝑺𝑶 𝑭𝑨𝑹...

sunshine hawthorne grew up in the foster care system, according to the letter her mother left her, she was just a teenager with strict religious parents who threw her out the minute they learned of her pregnancy, and sunshine’s father was nowhere to be seen, and giving sunshine up was easier than living on the streets trying to fend for herself and a child

SEXUAL & PSYCHICAL ABUSE TW growing up in the foster care system was a lot, she bounced from family to family, and the things that happened were unspeakable. sometimes the abuse was physical, emotional, or sexual and it just caused a lot of deep personal trauma for herself that was never resolved

this caused her to become reserved, stuck up for the underdog even if it was at her own expense, just intrinsically unselfish, has always been the mom friend to a fault

she was 10 when she got adopted into an extremely wealthy family, like i’m talking top ten wealthiest families in the states, and suddenly sunny hawthorne became sunny carmichael

so let’s take a minute to talk about the carmichael’s

they originate from old money, i’m talking so far back it’s unclear whether or not the money they have was obtained legally or not, this caused her parents to be a little reckless w their spending

her father: sebastian carmichael is the one who inherited the wealth from his father, who inherited it from his father, and the cycle continues, he was addicted to gambling add that to the fact that he was a serial cheater and you have an extremely poor father figure

ALCOHOL & DRUGS TW her mother: davina carmichael was a drug dependent alcoholic who spent all of husband’s money to makeup for the fact that he was cheating on her, started her own billion dollar company from scratch, plans on ‘giving it’ to sunny

the carmichaels were very problematic and all of their scandals were extremely public, in fact the only reason they adopted sunny in the first place was so that they could appear more well-rounded then they were

after that would come give siblings, and it fell upon sunny to take care of all of them, so from a young age she acted extremely mature, learned to fend for herself, and still managed to have a soul flourishing with tender spots

sunny was a gifted kid, not academically, she struggled A LOT, she had trouble paying attention, couldn’t read as well as the other kids. she got teased a lot for being ‘dumb’ and honestly hated it, it’s one of her biggest insecurities to this day. but what she lacked academically she made up for artistically, she was musically inclined, and it was clear that she loved to draw (apparent from all the doodles in the margins of her notebooks)

her family capitalized on this as if she were some sideshow attraction, come see our daughter! look how good she is at painting and doodling! pay us money! and although it made her feel like some trophy the could polish and show off, and this messed up sunshine even more because she knew deep down they didn’t love her

in high school she was the bubbly ditzy popular girl, chewed on enough bubblegum to finance a new mercedes, and just was that stereotypical girl ripped straight out of an early 00′s movie

was on the cheerleading team because again i tell you she was just living her best teen life! having an amazing time! vibing!

although her parents could give her anything they wanted and were decent enough to pay the bills for her and her siblings, she wanted to provide for herself, not have to depend on her parents for anything

she got into modeling! and although t took her a while to find her footing eventually she did, and it was a great time! but eventually parents got jealous and made her quit modeling altogether, because god forbid that she get more attention than they did

eventually (and to everyone’s surprise lmao) she went to college, and somehow got accepted into an ivy league....for art! not as surprising, but her family lied and said she went to business school bc of course they did

she went to harvard and majored in visual arts, she got her degree, and got her her happy ass out of there, mostly stayed focused on her studies, occasional party here and there

she was extremely worried about her siblings and she immediately went back home to them, surprisingly they were in one piece, not surprisingly they were being raised by nannies

she applied her visual arts degree and started designing clothes, then modeling said clothes, because although her parents had enough money to get her company off the ground, she wanted to do it by herself

and she did! finally bringing a decent name to the carmichael family!

was a guest judge on a bunch of modeling/runway shows, occasionally starred in her family’s reality tv show against her will, and was so dynamic she would be offered her own, and of course she jumped at the opportunity!

her mother tried handing off the company to her, and she declined! instead she opened up her own company selling her designs and was very hands on in learned to make cosmetics, and her company has been doing extremely well so far, it’s set to surpass her family’s company in a couple of years

as if she didn’t have enough on her plate she wanted to pursue her singing career, ended up having a whirlwind romance w a singer that she collaborated with, they were pretty serious and talked about being engaged, but eventually things fizzled out

said romance inspired a lot of her music, and encouraged her to keep going with her music career, she even worked her way up to the title of executive of their label, she’s on top of the world

she’s come a long way from the shy girl from foster care who afraid of her own shadow, but she’s lost none of her softness!

still extremely charitable and even started multiple charities all ranging from helping fund the foster care system to providing more funding for no kill shelters (she’s a vegan!) all of her charities are nation wide and oh boy does she have a lot on her plate

has....literally no time for anything else....still tries to prove to herself that she’s definitely not stressed and has so much free time! sdflksj tries to party and have fun, but mostly craves staying inside and takes baths with scented candles and just watches the same romcom over and over again

* && 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭

....okay so maybe it’s not completely believable that she got into an ivy league with her own merit, after all she’s not the sharpest tool in the shed and spoiler alert she didn’t

her parents bribed an admissions counselor to let their daughter in their visual arts program, they even donated enough money to renovate the art museum

all of this happened without sunny’s knowledge and she continues to live in blissful ignorance about the whole thing

* && 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

zodiac — cancer rising, cancer sun, & scorpio moon

alignment — lawful good

mbti — infp-t

enneagram — type 2 ( the helper )

temperament — phlegmatic

house — hufflepuff

positive traits — ( + ) altruistic , committed , conceptual , curious , courteous , determined , generous , humble , inventive , imaginative , loyal , loving , organized , passionate , playful , reliable , selfless , supportive , thoughtful , and trustworthy

negative traits — ( - ) anxious , cautious , compulsive , critical , disorganized , dogmatic ,, hyperactive , indifferent , insecure , impulsive , logical , oblivious , pedantic , protective , and resilient

* && 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

please don’t feel limited by this list because i have a brain the size of a walnut and this is all i can think of these are almost all ripped off ryker’s intro bc i’m not creative

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎ 𝑭𝑨𝑴𝑰𝑳𝑰𝑨𝑳....

family friends maternal or paternal cousins

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎ 𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑰𝑪...

past crush current crush flirtationship except she prolly doesn’t realize bc head empty unrequited love ( on either side ) fwbs will they? won’t they? someone her friends are trying to set her up with forbidden love of some kind idk maybe not exes on good terms exes on bad terms first love high school or college romances summer romance childhood crush friends to lovers pr relationship somebody who leads her on

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎ 𝑷𝑳𝑨𝑻𝑶𝑵𝑰𝑪...

BEST FRIEND / ROOMMATE PLOT BASED ON NEW GIRL OR FRIENDS PLS I WILL GIVE YOU MY EVERYTHING best friends confidants ride or die sibling like friends close friends neighbors?? enemies to friends reunited childhood friends drunk / party friends someone she’s a good influence on bad influence unlikely friends secret friends, aka friends who do not hang around in the public eye as their family or friends may not get along #married....just they argue and love each other like a married couple

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎ 𝑵𝑬𝑮𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑽𝑬...

enemies former best friends frenemies

#abuse tw #drugs tw #alcohol tw #wealthyhq:intro #I FINALLY GOT THIS DONE #please love me #this took so long #for no reason

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kissygrayson · 4 years

Text

LANDSLIDE: Chapter 2 - Happy Birthday Liam

… in which Y/N and Harry fall in love at university.

series masterlist

“Are you ready?” Amy asked entering Y/N’s bedroom. Y/N was sat at her desk in front of the mirror. Her makeup was scattered across the desk and a thousand dresses and skirts lay on her floor.

“The party started already” Amy said noticing her best friend wasn't dressed yet, still sat in her joggers and hoodie. Y/N sighed.

“I have nothing to wear”

“You literally have a million dresses right here!” Amy said bending down to grab the few dresses.

“They're ugly” Y/N muttered, turning in her seat to face her best friend.

Amy left the room leaving Y/N confused, then returning with a white crop top and and black denim skirt.

“Wear this, please!” she pretty much begged. Y/N took the outfit then going to try it on in her bathroom.

“Well?” Amy questioned “Do you like it or are we going to be another 90 years?” she laughed.

She left the bathroom, a small smile on her face. She shuffled through the boots and shoes beside her bed then chucking on her black doc Martens.

“Is that you done?”Amy asked with a huff. She felt like she’d been waiting forever.

“Okay I'm done, can you stop complaining for a second?” Y/N laughed.

The girls quickly put the essentials into their bags and left their flat. They passed their neighbour Mary on the way out, she usually sat on a seat outside her flat - for no reason really, other than wanting to see the drama that usually happened across the hall between the couple that lived in the opposite flat, Josh and Beth.

“Hi girls, you both look nice!!” she smiled sweetly, warming her hands with the cup of tea in her hand.

“Thank you Mary, anything exciting happen tonight?” Y/N asked with a laugh, gesturing to Josh and Beths side of the hall.

Mary laughed “No not yet, soon though im sure. You guys going anywhere exciting?”

Amy gave Y/N a look, telling her to hurry up. They where already an hour late.

“Going to a birthday party, we should get going though. We spent too long getting dressed” Amy said smiling. Mary nodded watching as the girls got into the elevator and left the building.

The girls finally found the building after searching for so long. They had walked up and down the same street for 20 minutes then realising the apartment was right in front of them. They entered the building hearing loud music, knowing exactly where the party was taking place. They walked up the stairs then coming to face with Liams apartment. A few people stood outside, some smoking, some just chatting and of course a few making out.

“Shall we just go inside?” Y/N asked Amy. Amy nodded.

The pair stepped inside a few hundred people cramped into Liams flat, most of them dancing to post Malone who was currently playing from the speakers. They stood awkwardly to the side, Y/N’s eyes searching the crowd to see if she could spot Harry or anyone else she knew.

“Y/N!” Harrys voice called out as she finished her short search. A smile spread across her face, Harry making his way towards the two girls.

“You guys just got here?” he asked.

“Yeah, took us forever to find the place” Y/N laughed. “This is Amy” she said introducing the blonde to Harry.

“Harry” he said with a smile in which Amy returned.

“You girls want a drink?” he questioned.

“Please” Amy groaned. Both girls then following the older boy to the kitchen where a thousand bottles of alcohol and snacks sat along with a few people. Harry handed both girls a bottle of beer then getting one for himself as they made small talk.

“So, do you both take the same classes or?” Harry asked followed by a drink of beer.

“No, Amy’s taking art” Y/N smiled.

“Wait” Harry paused then shouting “Yo Zayn!”

A boy around the same age as Harry entered the kitchen, a warm smile on his face and a red cup in his hand. Amy spun on her heel to look in the direction of him noticing he was in her classes.

“Zayn, this is Amy, she's also taking art” Harry introduced the pair, Y/N shook her head giggling when she realised what Harry was up too. Harry gave her a silly smile telling her to be quiet.

“Amy, I recognise you!!” Zayn said pulling the blonde into a hug.

“Please tell me you haven't did the work yet for Monday” she said with wide eyes. The class was to draw something that inspired them, Amy was yet to find that thing, leaving her homework to last minute - as usual.

“You haven't?” he questioned. Amy shook her head.

“Follow me Amy” Zayn laughed. Amy looked back at Y/N shrugging her shoulders, Y/N whispering for her to go.

“Look at you playing cupid” Y/N laughed once the pair left the kitchen.

Harry smirked “Its what I do best”

Before Y/N could say another word Harrys phone ringing interrupted the pair.

“Ill be right back, stay here” he said while running off to answer it.

Y/N stood awkwardly. She didn't really know many people at the University, never mind this party, so standing alone was her only option. She gave a small smile to the girl stood beside her who just drew her a dirty look back. Typical she mumbled to herself.

“Have you seen Liam?” A female voice said interrupting her thoughts.

Y/N looked to her left noticing a brunette that sat behind her in her Friday class.

“Y/N?” she questioned also noticing the familiar face.

“Sammie right?” she asked back then offering her a drink.

“Im okay, thank you though. Just looking for Liam, I swear that boy is always disappearing” She laughed.

Y/N smiled “I wouldn't know, you're the only person I know here other than Harry”

“Harry Styles?” Sammie asked taken a back.

“Thats the one” Y/N smiled, slightly confused.

“Be careful Bella” Sammie said. Careful? The boy seemed harmless.

“What?” She asked eyebrows furrowed.

“His ex girlfriend is a literal pyscho!” She laughed. “No but seriously, they broke up a few months ago and she's bat shit crazy. So please be careful” Sammie finished giving the girl a comforting smile.

“We aren’t dating, just friends” Y/N awkwardly said. She wasn't sure what to feel anymore. “Thanks for looking out for me though. Do you know where the bathroom is?” she questioned.

Sammie pointed down the hallway telling her it was the door to the left, then running of to find Liam.

Y/N made her way along the hallway, passing a few people on her way to which she gave them a small smile. She turned left seeing two doors, opening the first one her eyebrows furrowed. This certainly wasn't the bathroom, she thought to herself.

The walls where black, a few posters and photo frames scattered the walls. A laptop sat on the desk near the window, a TV and playstation beside it. She took notice of the white picture frame to her right sat on who she assumed was Liams chest of drawers. The picture was of 5 guys, one of them being Harry and another Zayn, the other she soon recognised was Niall and the two brunettes she didn't at all, surely one was Liam though.

“Y/N?” She heard Harrys voice call from beside her. Harry exited the bathroom that joined to whoever bedroom she was standing in, a confused expression on his face.

“You okay?” He asked.

“Yeah sorry, I was looking for the bathroom. I should go” She hesitantly said. Harry took a step closer to her, shutting the bedroom door.

“Do you really wanna go back out there?” He laughed taking a seat on the double bed. She shook her head with a laugh.

“I kinda hate parties too” Harry said with a smirk. Y/N took a seat beside him.

“Arent you supposed to be the bad boy, Styles?” She said returning the smirk. Harry chuckled at the girl, I guess she had heard the rumours.

“I’m really not as bad as you think” he said.

Y/N shook her head still smiling “Sure Harry. So why’d you hate parties?” She asked.

“Sophie is always there, I try my best to avoid her” he laughed nervously, knowing Y/N had probably been warned about her by now.

“Sophie? Your ex?” Y/N asked confused also worried. Harry seemed nervous now, so maybe Sammie was right in saying she was crazy.

“Yeah, she's insane” Harry laughed. “But just ignore her” He quickly said making sure the younger girl wouldn't be scared and decide not to speak to him anymore.

“You haven't dated since her?” Y/N asked curiously.

Harry shook his head laughing “Dated? More like I haven't had a proper conversation with a girl without her evil eyes staring at me”

Y/N eyes widened in shock. Maybe this was more serious than she thought. She’d never been in a proper relationship before, sure there where little things here and there, but shed never been commited to anyone, so she wasn't quite sure how Harry was feeling right now. All she knew was that this boy seemed nervous, scared even.

“Cmon she can’t be that bad” Y/N giggled trying to lighten up the mood. Harry raised his eyebrows shaking his head.

“Y/N you really have no idea” he laughed.

The pair sat in Liams room - she soon learned it was his room, for the next hour or so, getting to know more about each other. Y/N had learned that Harry had met most of the boys in high school, some of them shared classes with him and the others he played football with. He also hated the university library, calling it fate that she happened to be there the one day he was. She knew from that day in the library that he was soon to take over his fathers company, what she didn't realise was how big a deal that was. His father owned what seemed like a thousand hotels around the world much like her cousin Ollie, most of them in the US, some in Dubai, the UK and the list went on. They where some of the fanciest hotels in the world, only the best of the best could afford to stay the night there. Y/N was shocked.

Harry soon learned that Y/N had moved from Italy to Oxford to do nursing school. Her mother passed when she was 2 leaving her father to raise her on her own in Brighton, soon she met her step mother when they then moved to Italy and was blessed with two half siblings, Issac and Oscar. They also realised they both adored Fleetwood Mac, Harry claiming he was good at singing then promising he’d sing for her one day - he rarely sang in front of anyone, she must have been special.

Their meeting was cut short with Y/N’s phone ringing, Amy telling her to meet her outside. Realising that it was now 2am, she waved her goodbyes to Harry, him making sure she knew he’d see her again soon.

“So what happened with Zayn?” Y/N smirked, hooking her arm in her best friends as they both walked back towards their flat.

“I’ll tell you everything when we get home. Now you tell me what happened with Harry?”

taglist: @vinylhazza @cryinabtharvey

#landslide!harry #harry styles fic #harrystyles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #one direction #one direction imagine #one direction fanfiction #niall horan #zayn malik #liam payne #louis tomlinson

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freewheelshippin · 4 years

Text

30 utapri questions!

Thanks @dekiaibadchoices for the tag, this was an awesome way to wind down after a ton of nonstop busy busy busy!!! (and thanks for tagging this blog vs the general utapri one so i can REALLY gush LOL) Here’s the OG meme!

1. Your best boy?

BANANAMAN RAN WHO ELSE

2. Your least favorite boy?

“least favorite” implies dislike which...not true! truthfully it’s much of HEAVENS by nature of ‘I haven’t spent as much time getting to know these characters so I don’t really know who they are.’ (though I already know I love to go for drinks and snacks with Van hehe) i do like all of HEAVENS quite a bit from what i’ve seen so far but that affection has not had time to ripen!

3. A character that you never thought you would love as much as you do now?

mnmnj ranran tbh

4. A character you can relate to in any way?

I can’t answer everything with Ranmaru but like. His ambition, straightforwardness, and how the soul and spirit of music motivate him to move forward beyond a tough past are things I same hat so much ;; But HONESTLY I also relate a lot to Masa and Tokiya, especially in their moments of self-doubt and dramatic commitment to to their art?

5. A character that you think deserves more love?

Oh, Cecil, without a doubt. He’s such a resilient, committed, and open-hearted cutie and gets really shafted by canon tbh. Which makes it harder for everyone to see what a great boy this sweetie is! But I appreciate how Shining Live has given him some room to have really cute and standout moments so everyone can love him more but okay like, give me more Ceci and Ran palling around I love him most when they’re up to shenanigans

6. A character you would want as your partner?

well we’re posting this fuckin here so you all fuckin know (im very embarrass rn i can barely say it lmao)

(for the record i would also very much like to be friends with reiji and syo, they are cool people i think i’d get along with! and i know myself, if i knew otoya or masato IRL i’d just be like ‘well. that’s my son now’ and basically appoint myself their tough big sis-type-friend lookin out for them lol)

7. A character you would want as your mentor/senpai?

I would swallow a pinecone before I called him ‘onii-san’ but teach me how to network kotobuki-senpai

(No, like, forreal, I suck so, so bad at a ton of stuff Reiji is aces at, and I respect the hell out of his *waves* general everything and skilll navigating the industry. Since I’m a goofy, jokey, overenthusiastic teacher for work a lot it’d be nice to be on the receiving end of all that energy! and be a fucking decent kouhai that isn’t so horribly unappreciative of all his hard work and good cheer )

8. Your favorite ship?

shut your whore mouth i dont have the marbles to write it out

(tbh it’s also Haru/Tomo, I just feel so much more romantic chemistry between those two than Haru and any of the boys u___u Friends’ selfship stuff goes without saying, haha, and ngl I’m kind of About a Ren/Van rivalry hatemance? can i call it a kismesis thing? it’s a kismesis thing.)

(actually no I think I’m just a member of the “Ren Fucks and sometimes it’s Hatesex” club)

9. A character that you want to cosplay/have already cosplayed?

I had plans to cosplay Ranmaru a couple months ago bc it’s really not much of a stretch for my wardrobe, haha, but I dunno about that anymore! Part of it was wanting the Euphoria of looking like a tough, twunky, princely anime character but tbqh I’m already that every day of my life so

I suppose if you were to pull my leg I’d go for cosplaying Van, mostly because I wanna try that mullet on for myself.

10. Favorite side character?

TOMO!! LOVE U BITCH WHEN WILL I HEAR U SINGGGGGG

11. Your favorite solo song?

god this is horrible how can I decide??? so many good ones??? I think it’s a draw between Top Star Revolution, No. 1, Brand New Melody, Wild Soul, Seien Brave Heart, and Junketsu Nara Ai ~Aspiration~ ???

12. Your favorite duet song?

HMMMMM again too many good ones. Three-way tie between Haru Hana, NorthWind and SunShine, and Original Resonance!

13. Your favorite trio song?

Ahhh Dream More than Love is really nostalgic bc it’s the first Utapri song I really loved, but i gotta be real. It’s just Egoistic. There’s just no getting better than Egoistic

14. Your favorite group song?

mmmm i’m be basic. Poison Kiss

15. Your least favorite song?

I love Ai and Shouta Aoi’s incredible voice but......I’m really not a fan of super slow, overly-saccharine songs. u__u so A.I. really, really doesn’t land with me, much less so than easygoing (like Knocking on the Mind) or somber (like Winter Blossom) songs.

16. Your favorite singer?

ranran...it’s always ranran...

(I do also adore Natsuki’s and Camus’s voices! I tend to like deeper, richer vocal qualities, but you just can’t beat Ranmaru’s subtle growls and high-energy rock!!!! <3)

17. Your favorite group/trio/duo?

god what combo of these idiots DONT i love? I could watch Reiji prank and tease Ranmaru all fuckin day, and I also really like it when Ran’s at his most ‘tuff big bro-y’ with, like, Ai, Otoya, and Cecil!!! but honestly I do like how the Ran/Masa/Ren trio isn’t so straightforward and is more or less held together by a thin string of professionalism, there’s something i appreciate about not forcing ppl to just bury the hatchet and be Perfect Friends but you all can still care about each other? (Ranmaru needs to be nicer to them still but...)

i need to suggest one that isn’t ranmaru centric fjdsioafjsa i fuckin love Soccer Buds (otosyo) and I loooooove it when Otoya and Cecil are good to each other!!!

18. Your favorite member of Starish?

they’re all my favorite but if you REALLY had to make me pick.....Masato, probably, haha. I just...if you take yourself too seriously and care so much about everything but still know how to be Nasty how can I not love you???

19. Your favorite member of Quartet Night?

what do you fuckin think, hoss

20. Your favorite member of Heavens?

I mentioned earlier I don’t really know Heavens well, so ofc this is all liable to change! But off the bat I love what a conniving yet wholesome bastard Eiichi is and Van is just the kinda guy I would rib and pal around with IRL!!

21. Your favorite seiyuu/voice actor?

Ahhh that’s tough! I love all these goofbags, and Tattsun really is just so cool and makes music I’m pretty about. But I think I gotta give it to Suwabe, his performances are always so him but still pretty varied, and how can you not adore a man who loves his chihuahuas that much???

(if i’m being 100% honest Tattsun lost points bc he voices my absolute least favorite character in granblue ffjsfjisda)

22. Favorite Drama CD?

HMMMMMMM see as a certified Giant Tool for Everything Mecha and silly and extra, I enjoyed the hell out of Polaris, but it really suffers from a lack of Ranmaru in my humble fuckin opinion lmao. So even though I’m not one for pirate stuff most of the time, I gotta give it to Pirates of the Frontier!! I really loved Ranmaru and Otoya’s dynamic in that one, and Camus was juuuuust the right amount of shitheel, too.

I haven’t heard the whole thing but that thing from Egoistic where Natsuki squeezes Ranmaru to death and Eiichi’s just like ‘WUAHAHAHAHAH’ is also the mcfuckin best.

23. Your favorite shining live card?

CAN’T PICK

HOW COULD I POSSIBLY PICK?????????? LIKE??? I love the fucking dumb, dumb, dumb ostentatiousness of Evil Villains, I LOVE a good heel, and I also worked so so hard to t1 that event and had a lot of fun doing it!! But also, I just love his big smile and all the energy and mixed prints from Fortune and Prosperity, and it was literally the first time I ever got the exact card I was rolling for in a gacha on the last pull I had left!! (He also came home during a time I was really going through some shit, and ngl it rescued me a little bit!) but AHHHH Soulful Bass also came out right around my birthday, I love all the textures in the outfit and it’s generally the most My Aesthetique thing Utapri has ever released!!! And god, I just love it when he’s so confident and in his element like this, it sets me on FIRE to see him light up the stage wurghjgfj ;___; They all make me just want to HUG SO MUCH ARGGHHHHH

24. Your favorite song beatmap?

Ahhh I think Shining Live really has great beatmaps across the board so that’s a tough pick! Almost all of them are super fun in their own way, but I think I gotta hand it to Wild Soul, Top Star Revolution, and Innocent Wind!

25. Your least favorite song beatmap?

A.I. u__u Sorry, Ai...it’s just not fun for me.

26. Black Deja Vu or White Gravity?

Actually I’m really glad for this question bc I’ve been so busy lately I hadn’t given myself the time to really check them out! checking .........

and yep. Black Deja Vu. (I mean...Ranmaru is on it, haha.) But I’m so about this. Love this heavier sound and all these harmonies, this is so juicy. (White Gravity also absolutely kicks ass though!! I’m really liking that voice group, it’s making especially good use of those higher registers!)

27. Utapri merch that you own/want?

Honestly I don’t have much u__u Not a lot of Utapri merch is my thing...you know? I’m mostly shopping for Ran merch if I’m getting any, but I’m very picky about how he gets drawn? Keeping his toughness and a particular clothing style about him is so essential, haha, and barely anything hits that sweet spot for me. But I will say I adored the whole ‘My Favorite Things’ series, and if I had the budget and space atm I’d love to get some of the Ran goodies from that line!

28. How did you get into Utapri?

I first heard about it through some acquaintances from cosplay before Quartet Night was a thing. It didn’t appeal enough to my heavy metal ass to make me drop everything and try it, but I did have an interest in it I couldn’t explain and I’d always intended on trying it out. (especially after I got into Love Live and idol anime for a bit.) But it was Shining Live that got me! And I really only downloaded Shining Live because I was super exhausted after a business trip, didn’t want to leave bed once I got back home, and just wanted to sink my teeth in something new I could enjoy for hours while lying down, haha.

29. A set theme in shining live that you want to see in the future?

This will surprise nobody, but something tougher. More rock, more punk, more metal. I want all of them in studs and spikes and leather, and I want less polish. More rough!

I’d also love a wrestler set complete with who’s-a-heel-who’s-a-face but that’s a pipe dream and a half, lmao.

30. Why do you love your best boy?

Oh boy.

I think he’s this powerhouse of a human bean who can face a ton of pain and meet it with a big middle finger. And that middle finger is chasing after ambitious dreams, of spreading the power and soul of the same music that made me who I am and influences so much of my work, but also being ... you know, smart about it? He’s an idol because like, sure, maybe it’s not the OG dream, but you can’t dream if you’re dead, and you also deserve to give yourself a life and platform to share some of who you are, and you can do a lot of good with that, too. (And I won’t lie, I respect the drama of a man who takes his hair that seriously and commits so hard to the aesthetic he wears fuckin mismatched contacts i just. charm point )

But at the same time....I don’t know, this might sound presumptuous, but. I think. I just think he’d think I’m as neat as I think he is. I’m an ambitious, passionate person, too, and I also furiously stick to my ideals, and I also love the same kind of soul of music he does. I lean a little more metal than I do rock, but I think that’s nice, like sharing it has that ‘alike but different’ kind of familiarity and novelty all at once. Sometimes it’s tough sharing just how deeply rock and metal have sculpted me and my artwork (and therefore my career), bc it’s so deeply personal to me, and sometimes there’s weird elitism/misogyny/racism to deal with, too. But. The way he talks about rock, the way he describes the passion and how it transcends identity and is just a pure rush of power and sharing your feelings..................it just feels like he Gets it the same way I do. Just that unspoken, burning passion and understanding. I know it sounds weird to feel that strongly over just a music genre, but I just vibe with how to him, it really isn’t ‘just’ a music genre. I feel more accepting of myself for it, and I’d like to think he’d be real proud of himself for that.

And listen, like....I’m very sentimental, but I really don’t like saccharine, flowery, romantic kinds of affection to be lavished on me. Just be straightforward but also a little tsun about it fjdsjfas and ..... those are the kind of feelings I can accept. And that’s the way Ranmaru is, and it’s also grounded in the kind of reality that I don’t like to be swept away from. He’s just so cool and hardworking and unwavering in his passion, it makes it easier for me to do the same despite all the bumps in the road. This got real long but Ran’s a cool dude, haha, I got a lot of positives to say.

Anyways, I never tag folks for these things, but I love seeing everyone’s answers! If you see this and wanna fill it, feel free to count this as a tag from me :) I know this got real long, but with 30 questions how could it not haha? Thanks for reading and sticking around!

#iron maiden & rocka rolla #memery #long post

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oswaldsirius · 5 years

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Helloo!!! Im still a newbie to the cybird game world and was confused on how birthday events work?? Is there any way to do them without spending like $20+?? Cause from what i see, it doesnt seem possible- and if you can, how?? Its all so overwhelming!!

Hello! So two things right off the bat: this is going to be long because I’ve spent a lot of time playing this game to the cheapest I can. That being said I have spent a lot on this game during events. There hasn’t been an event yet that I haven’t spent money but it varies from event to event how much I drop.

I made a post once before about this, but I feel like I can flesh it out some more so on to some tips and tricks with Tasha!

So there are two types of events in IkeRev, story and collection. You didn’t ask about collection, but I might do another post about it because with Kyle’s route coming soon, it’ll be the next one we have and it’s completely different rules and strategy for that one. But for now! Story Events!

But for Story Events there’s a few key things to think about: Friends & Cards, Duels, Lucky Time & Bonuses, Love Points, and Items.

1. Friends & Cards

These two go hand in hand. Once you join an event, you want to get 20 friends as quickly as you can so you can start tapping in to the extra points they’ll bring when you duel. The later you join, the harder it is to fill this list. When you’re picking friends, to either send requests to or who to accept from, players with 5 star cards in their first slot are going to bring in the most points for you (30 while 4 star is 25 and 3 star is 20). If you have a 5 star card, put it in your main slot even if it isn’t your best boy. You can swap back at the end but people do play favourites when choosing friends and if you have a 5 star in the second slot but not the first people might pass you over. And try to keep the 5 star card in the main slot through the whole event. If you want to swap to hear lines in battle or with other characters for a new card from the event, that’s fine. Do it for a set of duels, but swap back. It’s not really fair to your friends to change like that mid event so try to be polite if you can! Don’t sweat it if you don’t have 5 star cards though. There’s plenty of people who will still accept your request because the extra points add up in the end no matter what!

2. Duels

Now, the game will give you a notification when your meter is full, but when I first started playing the game, I set alarms for every five hours. At the time, my phone was normally on silent so I wouldn’t hear the game notification; I heard the alarm loud and clear. It was easier and lord did it train me to pay attention for every five hours. Also at the end of your day, do as many duels as you can before bed. Your meter doesn’t have to be full to do them and these extra points will add up in the end! Now, as a new player, you’re going to want to really pay attention to the people you’re dueling. Some people are traps. They might have 4 star cards in their hand but they might just have terrible gacha luck. Always do single duels. It’ll sting less if you get a draw and you’ll get the most out of your friend points. They don’t stack if you do multiple duels. You get one bonus from a friend no matter how many duels you do. So just try to do them one at a time unless you know you can beat whoever you’re going up against.

I don’t have actual confirmation on this, but from what I’ve seen in Story Events is that the people you’re paired up against are those that have similar Love Points to you, not Beauty Points. So if you get a rash of good luck and amass a lot of points, you might find yourself up against people who are older players and have far more points than you. So always do single duels and try to remember names of people you know you can beat and those you know you cannot. The more you play, the easier it’ll be to recognise people. I’ve been playing since launch and there’s some people I avoid like the plague because I know I can’t beat them. Just keep cycling through duel partners until you get one you can beat! Or take a hit and get the draw points and wait the hour to see if it’ll give you new partners next time.

3. Lucky Time & Bonuses

Before you join an event, Cybird is kind enough that you can check to see when Lucky Times are and what bonuses they’re offering this time. I always check these, Lucky Time first since you’ll get double points for both the points you get for the duel and secret duel (friend points don’t double). A common trend is that the first Lucky Time will be 24 hours after the event begins. There have been some that it’s been later and that sucks when it comes to the bonuses. For myself, I made my own agenda/day planner and specifically put in a calendar page to track events in IkeRev, but what I suggest is putting reminders in your phone for when Lucky Time is. In the hours leading up to Lucky Time (and this really depends on your time zone), I usually will do just enough duels so that when Lucky Time starts I will have a full meter. It nets me a few extra points and I know I’ll still have a full set for when it starts. And a wonderful friend just mentioned to me that if you have a secret duel ready before Lucky Time, sit on it until Lucky Time starts. It’ll net you 200 points instead of the usual 100 so it’s another boost!

As for bonuses, being able to see them before you start an event is a fucking godsend because you can decide right there and then what you want to go for. Early Clear Bonuses are where you’re going to be dropping money if you want them. You need to decide up front if you do or don’t because you have to commit if you do. Usually the first one, for birthday events, needs to be attained within the first 25 hours for when you enter an event and the second at 72 hours. This is why you check bonuses before diving straight in. If you don’t like either of them or don’t think you can commit to it, start the event right away and just start earning you some points! If you do want the first one, don’t start the event immediately. Wait a half an hour or an hour and then start because that will give you a little more time in Lucky Time to make sure you have enough time to do Duels and still read the required story parts to get the bonus. If you want the second bonus but not the first, you have to make the decision if you want to wait for the first Lucky Time or just start right away. The Lucky Times are usually spaced out far enough that you’ll only hit one of them when trying to get the Early Clears. But that’s your call on if you want to wait and try or just go right into it!

For ranking bonuses, well, this one is harder since you never know how hard or easy people are going to play the event. Sometimes people lose steam and the border between the tiers is a lot lower than you would expect. Sometimes it’s stupidly high, especially if it’s a top 200 instead of the 300 we see on a lot of events. Take a look at these and plan as best as you can. Check the border for bonuses button on the ranking screen if you’re curious and set reasonable goals for yourself when it comes to them. As much as everyone wants to be top tier, it’s not always easy to get there without spending money.

Bonuses are always the deciding factor on if people want to spend money on an event or not. It’s best to look at them and decide what you want right at the start. Deciding half way through you want to try can end in heartbreak because you might not get it and then you’ve spent money for something you can’t have.

4. Love Points

Ah, the bane of my damn existence right here. So this is what Story Events run on. The more you have the easier it is to get through the event. But how many do you need to get through the different parts? They sometimes follow a standard but I’ve seen a pretty steep rise in points going from event to event all this year of playing. If you’re curious about how many points you need to clear endings, the best way to find out is to ask people. A few blogs on here are power houses when it comes to events and will finish within the first few days so if you ask nicely they’ll most likely share with you how many you need to get through the ends. Some only keep track of final points, others how many you need to get the Early Clear bonuses. 9 times out of 10, you can ask me. At the start of events, I usually have a rough idea of how many you’ll need and I don’t mind sharing as I play through. I won’t have exacts until I play routes but I can give estimates and update them as I go through.

Generally, we see the first ending clearing between 7500-8000 if you’re doing the Premium ending (which you should be if you want that first Early Clear bonus). The rest get tricky, depending on how many routes there are and this can be frustrating because you never know if it’s going to be a simple double or jump to 20,000. It gets messy when there’s more than four routes and full clearing on those can see point values getting close to 60,000.

But do your duels as much as you can and just keep amassing them!

5. Items

Alright, so I’m guessing this ask is mostly from the fact that I posted I made second rank on the Sirius Birthday Event. In full honesty? I started saving Tea and Cake sets in January for this single event. Before they dropped Clash in Cradle on us, I had 62 tea sets saved for Sirius. I used some in that event, bought more, and just died inside at how much I was spending. But I digress.

I played events like normal and on Lucky Time I buy the smaller item set. 800 crystals for 6 sets. It’s not that hard on the wallet and I would usually only buy one each event and then I sat on them. If I could afford more, cool, I would throw a little more money to buy another set and just use a couple on the current event to boost my numbers. Because Tea and Cake sets are the single most important item for Story Events. Use them only during Lucky Times so you can get the most out of them. I burn through my friends list every Lucky Time because I use my tea sets then and I max out my points as much as I can during it. I also sat on every single one the game gave me for login bonus. They only give one every two weeks but they do add up after a while. I also didn’t use my crystals for anything I didn’t need to and sat on them to use for buying Lucky Time sets. You get 100 every two weeks and if I didn’t need closet space, I just kept them. Since they’re free, you need 300 to pull on the gacha and I decided the Story Event sets were what I wanted more. But that’s your call!

Another thing I invest in is the Secret Tea Party. You get 900 crystals across two weeks time and another Tea and Cake set! It’s not that expensive in the grand scope of things and mine lines up with my pay day so once every two weeks I buy it and get more crystals and more goodies! It’s a good way to spend just a little and get things for the long run!

If you start the event on the first day, you’ll get both a Love Potion (500 points) and a Tea and Cake set. If you start after the first day, you only get the Love Potion, which still helps but those tea sets are what you want.

Love Potions are the other item you can buy if you want to boost your points. Single ones are 150 crystals for 500 and they are guaranteed points vs the 150 crystals for a tea set that can net you more points provided you win all your duels. A set of 27 is….3500 I think? I can’t remember but I’ll correct if someone can remind me! That will net you a lot of points but it’s a lot of money to drop so it’s not the best thing to get if you’re trying not to spend money.

If you want to save money, buy the smaller sets and try to save as many as you can that the game gives you.

I know this is…a lot. But it’s what I follow and I manage to get through the events well enough. I’ve missed a lot of Early Clear bonuses because of it but I just accept that not all of them are for me and keep going. I knew at the start of the year that May was going to be a mess because we have not only Sirius’s birthday event but also the anniversary event is right around the corner and it’s a two parter with bonuses linked between the two of them. So I still have almost 30 tea sets saved for that nonsense. But following this, there’s only been one event in the year of playing that I haven’t been in the top tier and I chose not to go hard on that event. I was still in the second tier and I didn’t use a single item in the whole event.

It is possible to rank and do well, you just have to be patient and play smart. I went into Sirius’s event wanting to be in the top ten and then I decided to be stupid and go for second spot for my second in charge guy. Don’t be like me. It’s a dumb way to play.

Another thing you can do, is check IkeRev’s Japanese twitter. If you go back far enough, it will show old events and sometimes you can see some of the bonuses so you can decide in advance which events you want to try a little harder on. Then you can start saving early for when it finally rolls around to us!

If you’ve made it this far, I love you and hope I’ve helped a little. If you have more questions, feel free to ask. I’m more than willing to help and share because I know the events can be odd. If you want to know about collection events, let me know! Because I have some good ways to earn hearts without spending a damn penny. But I’m going to stop typing this essay now and just pray I helped a little bit!

#ikemen revolution #ikerev #story events #long post #i told you i wanted to answer you properly #and you got an essay in response #but i hope it helps!#razzanons #tasha replies #tips and tricks

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thetourguidebarbie · 6 years

Note

What about Klaroline with Klaus being jealous of Caroline's close friendship with Enzo. it doesn't have to end in smut but im fine if it your choice.

Emergency fluff for one of my favorite people. @chica-cherry-lola has been reminding me for months that I promised her a mini-sequel to A Guilty Pleasure, my tattoo artist/florist au I wrote for @lalainajanes a bajillion years ago for a v-day exchange. Thank you to @garglyswoof for looking over this quickly.

This has smut in the beginning and is teeth-rottingly fluffy, so if that’s not your thing, I’d skip it. Bookshop AU will be posted once I get the edits in (sorry you’re getting a false alarm, Laine).

His chest was pressed against her back as his tongue traced a trail along her collarbone, the combination of it with his fingers curling against her walls bringing her just to the edge, but unable to tip over. Her eyes closed as he pressed soft kisses to the back of her neck, legs shaking as he brushed his fingers over her clit. “You’re so lovely,” he whispered, nipping her shoulder. “I do enjoy the sounds you make for me.”

She moaned softly in response as he pinched her clit lightly with his thumb and forefinger, her moan turning into a muttered string of expletives as she came, and she felt his stubble scratch against her skin as he smiled. She was breathing hard as she turned on her back to look at him, her lips parting slightly as she realized he was sucking her arousal off his fingers. He bent to kiss her once he was done, his palm steady on her hip, his tongue brushing across the seam of her lips. She moaned softly as he dragged his teeth across her shoulder and moved down to press kisses down to the valley between her breasts, flicking his tongue against her nipple before moving down her ribcage.

“I have a question, sweetheart,” he said, his voice muffled as his lips moved across her skin, and she arched her back as his tongue traced the flowered vine inked on her ribs.

“What?”

“What’s this tattoo from?”

She laughed. “It’s me and Enzo’s twinsies tattoo.”

Klaus froze mid-lick, pushing himself up so that he was looming over her. “Beg pardon, sweetheart?”

“A twinsies tattoo? You know, like when you and your best friend get matching tattoos to indicate that you will, in fact, be ‘best friends forever’?” Caroline said teasingly, making air quotes.

He stared at her with a look of what she considered completely unwarranted revulsion. “You and Enzo have matching tattoos?” he asked slowly, starting to withdraw his hand, clearly intent on getting an explanation. She grabbed his wrist, her eyebrows raised before groaning when she realized that he wanted the whole story before she’d get her next orgasm.

“Yeah. We were in our second year of college and Enzo and I were taking this really boring history class. It was basically impossible to study because the Professor’s study guides didn’t actually match what was on the tests or quizzes, which should totally be illegal. Anyway, the point is that it was finals week and we both knew that what ended up on the test was completely random, so we made a dumb bet that whoever scored higher could pick a tattoo for the other one. Just so you know, talking about my basically-brother-best-friend is not keeping me turned on.”

“And he won?”

“Nope, I did! I just got the same one in solidarity. I tried to talk Bonnie into it too but she said that couples tattoos were always a mistake no matter what. I thought it was kind of romantic, but she’s annoyingly practical.”

“Romantic, hmm?” he asked, and she narrowed her eyes as she watched the gears turn in his mind.

“Klaus...” she groaned, half out of exasperation and half because she wanted him to start moving again.

He bent and ran his nose along the curve of her neck. “I did tell you that I liked the idea of leaving a mark on someone’s body with my art. You even more.”

“I don’t know,” she said, the last word turning into a breathless ‘oh’ as he slipped two fingers back inside of her, her back arching. “I think you just don’t like that another guy and I have matching tattoos.”

“Perhaps,” he allowed, his fingertip tracing her hipbone before he bent to kiss her again.

“You’re such a jealous weirdo,” Caroline muttered between kisses, though there was no bite to her tone.

“You like it,” he whispered, nipping her ear and curling his fingers against her g-spot, making her gasp.

“In small doses,” she managed to pant out.

“You can’t tell me you don’t enjoy it, love. I feel that shiver run down your body when I press my hand against the small of your back as we walk, hear the way your breath catches when I tell you that you belong to me.”

“Klaus...”

“Try to deny it then,” he murmured. “Tell me you’re not mine, Caroline. Try.”

“Klaus,” she said, a tinge of warning coloring her tone.

“Yes, sweetheart?”

“You’re a smug jerk,” she muttered, her face half buried in his chest. She could feel his chest rumble against her cheek as he chuckled, curling his fingers against her walls, his other hand slipping between the cheeks of her ass, making her squeak in surprise.

“All right?”

“Fuck,” she hissed, unable to decide between riding his fingers or pressing against where he was touching her back entrance, her breathing growing shallow. “It’s good,” she managed.

“I’d like to take your pretty arse with my cock later,” he said quietly, pinching her ass before letting his hand travel down the back of her thigh, the drag of nails against her skin deep enough that he’d most likely leave a mark.

“After we unpack,” she said, taking a deep stuttering breath when Klaus pushed the tip of his finger into her back entrance as he nibbled at her neck and stroked her clit, the sensations almost too much for her to handle. She heard him hum against her skin when she came, clearly pleased, pulling back to look at her and brushing a damp curl from her face with his nose to press a kiss to her temple.

“I like you here.”

“Well, that’s good since I’ll be here every night for the foreseeable future,” she teased, sliding her arms around his shoulders to rub a curl between her fingers, the other hand tracing the lines of the triangle inked on his back. “But as comfortable as our bed is, I still have a lot of closet-invading and counterspace-stealing to do.”

“It’s not invading or stealing if it’s yours,” he pointed out, letting her go reluctantly as she wriggled out from under him and slid out of bed, reaching for the jeans she’d managed to half pull on before Klaus had coaxed her out of them earlier that morning. She looked over her shoulder to see him eyeing her hungrily and grinned.

“How am I supposed to concentrate knowing that you’re wearing nothing under those?”

“Like you always do,” she said unsympathetically. “I have full faith in your ability to get up and walk the ten feet to the shower without jumping me.”

He huffed grumpily in a way that probably shouldn’t have been endearing. “Later, I promise,” she repeated. “Seriously though. Get in the shower now so I can send you on a coffee mission when you get out.”

“So bossy,” he murmured, sitting up and stretching. She found herself tempted to throw out her unpacking plans and crawl back into bed to run her tongue down his abs, but at this point she’d committed to her non-sex Sunday agenda and she was too stubborn to admit defeat.

“Is that a problem?” she asked with a raised eyebrow, adjusting her bra and reaching for her blouse.

“Hot in small doses, as you’d say,” he teased, pushing the covers off and running his hand through his hair. She drank him in shamelessly, smiling when he pressed a light kiss to her temple as he walked past her to their master bathroom, his hand lingering on the vine on her ribs for a moment too long, thumb brushing along one of the leaves.

She took a shaky breath, glancing at the door as it closed behind him. Her skin was still burning from his touch, her heart pounding in her chest. They’d been together for almost a year now, counting the time she’d spent in denial pretending they were friends with benefits, and he still made her pulse race on a daily basis, made her feel wanted and beautiful and powerful.

She’d spent way too much time at the beginning worrying that his feelings for her would fade and the only thing to linger would be physical chemistry. She’d been embarrassingly obvious and he’d noticed, but instead of brushing her insecurities off with pretty words, he’d reassured her with every affectionate touch and warm smile that he wanted a connection with her that was more than physical.

Honestly, she couldn’t imagine being with anyone else.

She traced the swallow on her wrist that she’d gotten the week of her eighteenth birthday absently as she considered his words from earlier.

I like the idea of leaving my mark on someone’s body with my art. You even more.

She wondered if she should be scared that she liked the idea too.

“What do you want to do next week?” Caroline asked, sinking down on the couch and pressing her cheek against his shoulder, glancing at his sketchpad. He inhaled her scent, the subtle floral shampoo that now clung to his pillows on nights when he wasn’t even dreaming. It had been two months since she’d moved in and he hadn’t yet been able to get out of the habit of pulling her closer in the mornings before she woke just to savor the feel of her against him. He wasn’t sure he’d ever shake away the constant wonder that she’d chosen to stay.

“Ooh, that’s pretty,” she said, shifting so that she could get a better look without impeding his drawing hand.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he said, twirling the pencil between his fingers before adding more shading to the dragon’s wing.

“For a client,” he said, frowning as he inspected his work. “I think it needs something else. Been redrawing it for a few hours now, but it never looks quite right.”

“Do you need a few minutes then? For your muse to visit, or whatever?”

“Don’t be silly, love. My muse happens to be sitting right beside me.”

“You are a cheeseball,” she said, kissing him lightly on the cheek. “But seriously. Next week?’

“For our anniversary? I have plenty of ideas for all the things I’ll do to you,” he said, giving her a wicked smirk and taking a bit too much satisfaction in the flush that crept up her cheeks.

“Klaus!”

He could tell that she wasn’t actually annoyed with him, her exasperation more fond than anything else, though from the way she was shifting against him he could tell that she had something she was holding back.

“Do you have any preferences?” he asked, studying her face for any hint of her feelings, and he recognized the tilt of her chin as her mentally prepping herself to say something she wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to spit out.

“I was thinking we could go to the shop.”

“For a private romantic dinner?” he asked, already planning at least ten different things they could do with her stockroom table.

She swallowed. “Yours, actually.”

“Mine?” he asked, not quite daring to believe what she was implying.

“I want you to give me a tattoo,” she said. “If you want to.”

“What do you want?” he asked immediately, reaching for his sketchbook and eagerly flipping to a new page. “Anything specific?”

“I want something symbolic.”

“The flower?” he offered, only half-joking, already trying to remember the exact slant of its petals.

“No. I want...I mean, I wanted to do something about the second I realized that I actually had feelings-feelings for you as opposed to sex-only-feelings, but that moment didn’t really have any symbolic objects that I’d feel comfortable having on my body permanently.”

“When was it?” he asked, unable to restrain his curiosity.

She blushed, unable to meet his eyes. “It was the night when we had the fight before we got together.”

“When you walked out on me?” he asked, not particularly wanting to open old wounds but needing to clarify.

She winced. “It wasn’t my proudest moment, okay? It just kind of hit me all at once, you know? I was like, in hardcore denial, and you put your arms around me and told me to stay and...” she trailed off, tangling her fingers with his and giving him a small smile. “I wanted to, and I was worried that you were just like, being polite—“

She glared at him when he was unable to restrain a laugh, setting down his pencil. “Caroline, when have I ever been polite to anyone out of obligation?”

“Well I didn’t know that then,” she said grumpily. “I mean, I did, but again, denial.”

“Right.”

“What about you?”

“Hmm?”

“What was your moment?”

He didn’t even have to think about it, his lips curling into a smile as he told her how beautiful she’d looked bent over her terrarium diagram in the coffee shop. How he’d watched her hands as she shaded the sketch carefully, admired the way her teeth sank into her lower lip as she concentrated. “I knew I’d enjoyed talking to you,” he explained, smiling at Caroline’s raised eyebrow. “But that moment...I was curious about you. Your story, your hopes and goals. I wanted to get to know you. I couldn’t resist.”

“That’s so cute,” she said, grinning at the face he pulled at the word. “Sorry. You’re just much more romantic than me.”

“I’m not sure that’s true,” he said, tugging one of her curls between his fingers. “In any case, perhaps you don’t want a tattoo of the experimental flower Bonnie gave you, but there are other options. Chrysanthemums?”

She groaned. “My least favorite flowers that I refused to sell you so that you wouldn’t poison your sister’s boyfriend? I’d rather have the sex plant.”

“Do you still have the sketch?”

She frowned. “From the coffee shop?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah. I’m sure I still have it,” Caroline said, moving off the couch and walking to the section of the bookshelf where she kept all her original sketches for her terrarium and bouquet ideas. She pulled out the one labeled ‘succulents’ and flipped through it, sliding a piece of heavy paper out of a page protector and scanning it thoughtfully before handing it to him.

“This one?”

He nodded, taking it and running the tip of his finger along the outline. “I want this here, I think,” he said, gesturing to the left side of his ribcage. “And I’ll get it in color, but I can make it subtler for you if you like. Just the outline or shadow...”

“Matching tattoos?” she asked, her eyebrows raised.

“You said they were romantic,” he pointed out, and she nodded, leaning against his side and inspecting the sketch.

“I like it,” she said. “Even if it feels a little weird to have a tattoo of something I drew.”

“I can always sketch you something, sweetheart. Whatever you want.”

“I think I want the orchid,” she said after thinking it over for a few seconds. “But in a purple or a blue. The real-life pink was really loud.”

“That can be arranged,” he murmured, already sketching the outline. “Where do you want it?”

“Same place as yours.”

“Doing it over bones is the most painful area,” he warned slowly, glancing at her, and she smiled, pecking him on the lips.

“It’ll heal, and I totally look forward to your inevitable weird obsession with licking it.”

“Is that another thing you’ll only tolerate in small doses?”

“No. Tattoo-licking is highly encouraged,” she said, her tone and expression so serious that if he hadn’t known her well he would have missed that she was trying desperately not to laugh.

“Noted, sweetheart.”

“Good,” she said, curling with her feet underneath her to peek over his shoulder at the orchid he was carefully outlining. “I love you, you know. A lot.”

“And I, you,” he said quietly

He didn’t need to look at her to know she was giving him the bright smile that she seemed to reserve for moments like this, when they were close and comfortable. He could see it in his mind’s eye, could have easily sketched it from memory.

He couldn’t resist looking anyway.

#klaroline #klaroline drabbles #klaroline drabble #klaroline smut #klaroline fanfiction #chica-cherry-lola #a guilty pleasure #my fanfiction #mydrabbles #outtake #klarolinekolvina #ask #answer

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zeamusic-blog1 · 5 years

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3:01 am 31/05/19

i almost killed myself 3 days ago. or almost tried to at least. i also relapsed and self-harmed again for the first time in almost a year i think. well idk if you can call it self-harm, i just scratch myself as hard as i can all over my arms. doesn’t draw a lot of blood but it does leave marks for a few days. i just like how my arms literally burn afterwards and they go all red and there are welts for a few hours. it feels good. im not sure what triggered it. everything had been irritating me and getting on my nerves for the past 2 weeks, probably bc i was PMSing, but it got so dark and so deep 3 days ago. i think bc it was his birthday the day before and it just made me remember everything that happened with him. and it just made me realise that he probably has not thought of me at all in the last 2 months at least. people forget me a lot easier than i forget them. i care way more about people than they care about me. and i spent a full 6 minutes in front of the mirror that day, crying and repeating to myself “i deserve better” i deserve fucking better bc i do, i deserve the whole world. but then why does everyone leave so easily. no fight or argument, they just exit my life. like a, s, s, r, d, m, a, i, a, e, all just left me in their past. replaced me with someone else. if it’s that easy then do i really mean anything at all? surely if i was significant it wouldn’t be so simple for so many people to leave me and forget me. whilst i’m left reminiscing every day, wondering what i did so wrong and what could’ve been if i’d done something differently. i never want to have any regrets bc what’s happened has happened. but lately, i regret everything. i dont know where to start or where to end or how to sit with myself. i hate being alone. i cant be by myself, thats when everything starts going downhill. i hate how i always need someone to make me feel complete. i wish i could give all the love i want to give to someone else, to myself and be okay with just myself. but i cant. when im alone i just get in my head and then try and kill myself apparently. i was high as fuck that night and took a knife to cut open a box and i just looked down at it in my head, so light and easy, and it just struck me how fucking easy it would be to just press the blade to my wrist and drag vertically and let it do its work. but the tiny rational part of my brain was terrified at the thought and so i never got to that point. i just pressed the knife to the corner of my palm and dragged down over and over. but i must not have been pressing that hard bc i didnt cut into muscle, just split the first few layers of skin. i’ve always been averse to cutting and i guess it was my subconscious preventing me of committing it in that moment. but i came so close to drawing blood and that terrified me. the real, serious thoughts i had of just cutting open my wrists or stabbing my jugular or getting the box of paracetamol and just taking all 40 pills in there, they terrified me and i had the first ever paranoia i ever felt whilst high. the 2 days following that were just as bad, although i didnt pick up a knife or pills. just sat in my room crying for most of the day, if not the whole day. today was okay. i didnt cry until half an hour ago when i reinstalled snapchat and saw m and y had messaged me to make sure i was okay. i know there are people who care but at the same time, there’s this voice constantly saying that they don’t really care and they definitely dont care the same way you care about them. and i find myself listening to that voice a lot more nowadays. all the same, i want to talk to them. i want to reach out and ask for help and just tell someone who cares, even if just a tiny but, whats been going on and how scared and fucking miserable i am. but i just couldn’t bring myself to. i didnt want to face the disappointment of not getting the reaction i want, which i dont even fucking know what reaction i want. i also just dont want to burden them. i know they have their own shit going on and i dont want to add to that and make it worse. i just have no one to speak to at this point and i’ve never felt as alone as i have this whole week. its been really shitty, to say the least. i guess thats why i wrote this. i just had to get it out somehow and i couldnt tell people in my life so here it goes forever into the interweb. nobody’s going to read this anyway, who’s going to click on my tumblr. so i guess it’s alright. just a place for me to get my thoughts out and hopefully find a better, healthier way to cope with all this. i love you and you deserve better okay. you will be okay. help yourself. please.

#thoughts

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gukiee · 7 years

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUNGKOOK: 365 Reasons why I LOVE him

Hope you’re ready for this because I’m about to word vomit my love and adoration for Jungkook for 365 bulletpoints straight

first of all what isn’t there to love about him:

his cute soft gentle bunny smile

the way he takes out (specifically the right) earpiece when hes singing

his lower lip mole

HIS SINGING VOICE

like the way his voice can go rly low and raspy but then also really high pitched and whiny and squeaky im literally in love

HIS LAUGHHHHH when he starts laughing so hard he starts clapping and throwing his whole body into it

or how his giggle starts off quiet but then it gets rly high pitched and squeaky

but then he laughs so hard that no sound comes out and it gets rly low and he gasps in between laughs its so cute :(

the way he chooses to use formal language with his hyungs out of respect even when he’s been told multiple times it’s okay to speak comfortably

the way he works so hard at ABSOLUTELY everything he does

like how he wanted to get good at bowling so he went almost every day at 2am DESPITE promotions and a busy schedule and practiced for months to improve

the way he hums in between his words when hes thinking and makes this like? “kahhhehh” sound in between when he’s not sure what to say next

his big brown beautiful eyes and the way they’re so big and sparkly :(

his silly personality when he’s rly comfortable and starts getting absolutely wild and fools around with his friends

the way hes finally starting to open up and become less shy and now has friends outside the group he speaks to regularly

THAT TIME HE WENT TO BURGER KING AND ORGANIZED ALL HIS TRASH WHEN HE WAS DONE

hes just rly? respectful and thoughtful and always puts people before himself

how he worked SO hard on his Begin solo stage and KILLED IT WITH THAT FOOTWORK

speaking of solo stage RAINISM was.... well I think if you follow this blog you know how I feel about rainism but ya... killed it

mmmmmmmm his voice in classroom ideal

and the belt chain

that one time the members pranked him for his birthday and the manager yelled at him for messing up the choreo (which was part of the prank) and said something along the lines of “do you think you’re so perfect you don’t mess up?” and he got rly quiet then when they revealed it was a prank he cried because he thought he was letting everyone down

acts tough and sexy but is really a big softy

cries when his hyungs are struggling

like when taehyung’s grandma died and they spoke about it on stage and he started crying

or when he started crying when they won their daesang because he said he was so overwhelmed with thankfulness and wanted to make us proud

or how he cried during the epilogue tour because he “wants to be our singer forever”

I just rly love how passionate he is and how he rly cares so much about making others happy

always says hes okay even when hes not because he doesn’t want to burden people and want to put them first and not worry them

bought music equipment to get better at making music because he had a hard time with Begin and wanted to practice more

is always practicing SOMETHING to get better at

his thiccccccc thighs oohohohhhhhhh booooyyyyy do I love those thic thighs mmmmfmckkk

the way his body moves when hes on stage

his soft hair :( whether its straight across his forehead, parted, curly, pushed back, straight, wavy idc black brown blond pink highlights red purple it could be any colour and any way and i love it all :(

his big manly hands with those long dainty fingers

HIS DIMPLES!!!!!! WHEN HE SMILES RLY HARD AND HE GETS ONE RLY PROMINENT DIMPLE ON HIS LEFT SIDE AND HIS CHEEKS CRINKLE A LITTLE BIG AND SINK IN SDHFGJK

his scar on his cheek :’)

the scar on his arm by his elbow

his long lashes

the veins.......on his arm..........and hands..........and in his neck lmmmmcmmmfmckkcki 😭😭

the mole on his neck

and cheek

and the beauty mark on his right nostril

his puffy pink lips that are always so soft

that meme dance he does u know the one with the hands and that facial expression

how extra he is it’s one of the things I love so much about him because hes never afraid to be silly

that time literally HOPPED IN THE OCEAN, PULLED OUT A HUGE ASS FISH, THEN WORE IT FOR A TIE SDFJGKHK

his cute lil tongue

that sexy angry expression he gets where he fcking furrows his brows and his eyes get hooded and they his brows crease heavily in the middle and he makes that snarl and his nose crinkles fghdjk

when he laughs and he gets those little creases by his eyes omgfg

how he brushes his teeth when hes nervous

how fidgety he is when he’s been sitting for too long

the way his mouth hangs open when he’s focused and thinking about something

memekook

the way he takes the time to learn english and is constantly asking rapmon if he did it right and practices lots

how on Run!BTS when it was revealed that the spy wouldn’t be able to eat he said “that’s not fair” even though he knew he wasn’t the spy

the way he always sniffles from his rhinitis

how he sleeps with his mouth slightly open

really quiet and sweet vs really loud and goofy

“g2g guys 😂😂😂 lol”

“safety first, safety second, coolness third.”

“we’re all going to end up going to hell anyway”

his love of lamb sewers

his love for army !!! he really does everything in his power to show us he loves and cares about us and gets really emotional when talking about it

how damn strong he is like holy fkcing hell can we talk about how he rolls backwards into a handstand

how he takes the time to cover english songs to help improve his english and give the fans content even though he could be doing something else

how he goes out of his way to be daring and pushes himself

speaking of daring, how fearless he is and how hes really not afraid of many things, like how he has no problem going on roller coasters or bungee jumping n pushes himself to the limits

how when he laughs his eyes and nose do the thing (u know the thing)

his long pretty eye lashes

how dainty his wrists look when he wears thin bracelets

and when he wears rings on his index and pinky fingers

his thin ears with those hoop earrings

H E L I X P I E R C I N G

that one run performance where suga played piano and he solo danced

his fashion style

his love for overwatch

the Dope police uniform goodbye

the fact that he still managed to graduate with special honour awards despite the busy schedule of being an idol

and how he spent a CRAP TON of money on dinner for his hyungs after

his drawing skill

the lil bruises on his legs :((((

how at the american concert he seen people being pushed in the pit and asked rapmon to tell them to stop and was signalling for them to stop pushing

also idk if any of u have noticed this but he has rly nice nails??? like theyre literally perfectly shaped

his appreciation of IU (my queen)

and his love of justin bieber

running around with the flag tied around him like a cape

Iconic fish as a tie (like he for real just WALKED INTO THE OCEAN AND CAUGHT A BIG ASS FISH WITH HIS BARE HANDS)

how he gets really emotional when talking about/to the fans and starts crying

n the way his nose gets red when he cries

that “i’m not sure about that” head tilt he does sometimes

how when hes trying to perfect something he asks a million questions to make sure hes doing it right

and practices DAY N NIGHT

HIS VOICE IN CLASSROOM IDEAL

THE GLOVES IN CLASSROOM IDEAL

how he bought everyone burgers during flower crew (cries over that show bc i cannot believe how dirty they did m boy)

how he was so visibly upset/embarrassed when they were rude to him like i rly cry

the look he gets of pure concentration when hes monitoring himself behind the scenes of a music video,

the way he says chong jojun balsa 😩😩

his strong ass calves ghjkdfgv

his cover of “if you” during masked man n show little n shy he was :((

goes from cute to s*xy to meme all in 2 seconds

how he pauses in between chews n smacks his lips a lot when he does

and when something is really good n he closes his eyes momentarily and does that headshake

the mama performance where he hung suspended in the air despite having hurt himself doing it but was committed to doing a good show

his skin no matter what condition it is

with makeup

without makeup

flawless

with flaws

tanned

pale

and the little bumps he gets when hes rly stressed out

how hes said that hes really shy and is better at expressing feelings over text

his over the top “boy version” of the russian roulette dance

in fact his over the top everything

his big bulging biceps.............

pretty deep ass collar bones

how he plays with his hair when hes nervous

the way his bottom lip puffs out when hes chewing

and how he nods when hes really enjoying something hes eating

nochu come thru

that performance where he took off his jacket n showed off his big ass biceps and effectively destroyed my whole existence

when he was playing with puppies and was giggling all over the place saying “this isn’t for you it’s mine” when it tried getting his coffee

how he was scouted by 8 different entertainment agencies but picked bighit because he thought rapmon was cool

and how he travelled all the way to Seoul from Busan at 14 and was probably HORRIFIED and scared but did it anyways which is extremely brave

and how hes continued to work hard from that day on

his love for the arts like photography

is always interested in learning new things like the drums and guitar and english

that dramatic ass video he made for yoongi’s birthday which was literally just him self promoting himself and making fun of yoongi lmao

how he used to wait until everyone was asleep to shower because he was shy

and how he would go out in the middle of the night to go eat by himself or wait until people were asleep to eat because, again, he was really shy

his spotify playlist and how its full of just soft, calming, gentle, romantic songs

like he has a damn Pocahontas soundtrack song

how sometimes he just ???? shoves things in his mouth??

like? an entire microphone? or a birthday hat? or an entire piece of paper?

more recently a fan??? like a whole handheld fan??

or the time he covered his whole face in sticky notes

or when he was eating during an interview n was so hungry he literally ate the entire wrapper and didn’t realize

that thing he does with his lips where he sucks them in and licks them a bit and his cheeks crease a bit

the way his knuckles and finger tips are always a little more red than the rest of his fingers

how he rubs his eyes when hes sleepy

his long lashes

the way he looks in a tux/dress shirt/tie

okay how he looks in anything tho lets b real lmao

how hes still nervous to sing on stage

how the other members said it took them SO long to get him to sing in front of them because he was super shy

the way he constantly licks his lips

his long thanks to at the end of the albums where he usually needs 2 pages

how he looks when hes observing himself after filming

switch from cute kookie to rude jeon to memekook within 2 seconds

his sensitivity to smells

his love of victorias secret fragrances

and his love of makeup

not afraid to admit those things!!!

his vast collection of white/black plain tshirts

and his timbs which literally look good with EVERYTHING

all his piercings

how he said he was happy people liked his new piercing and wants more but won’t in fears people won’t like it :(((

speaking of which how he stopped wearing his favourite pants because people said they didnt like them

literally does everything for the fans

how he comforted that fan crying during that fansign :((

put his hands in the fans hands!!!

booping their nose!!!!

so interactive with fans!

that one time he was walking alone and seen a group of guys covering Boy in Luv and stayed and even clapped for them

stopped to take pictures with fans when they asked

that time he fell asleep standing up in the middle of the airport and had to be woken up to keep the line moving

always listening to music !

his playlist is so calming and relaxing and honestly he has some of the best music taste ever

that huge ass cameo backpack he always carries around with him

“the golden closet”

that time he hid in the dark during a music video shooting and was the only one not scared

how he gets rly quiet when he isn’t able to do something the way he wants and is scared of disappointing ppl :((

his meme-y twitter videos

his cute ass toes

like he really has some nice ass feet

listen i hate feet but his feet are so clean n pretty n soft looking

and his little nose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

when he said he wants to meet someone and hear bells like in Your Name

his love of anime

and webtoons

JUSTIN SEAGALL i cant even believe him sometimes

how he literally always has bruises on him everywhere ???

when the boys were having a snowball fight and he came out with an arm full of snow n just demolished them lmao

during that one run episode where they were at the arcade playing the racing game and he was driving with one hand on the wheel sdgfhjdkf

AND when he was playing that power/hitting game and he hit it so hard he literally hurt himself but tried to play it off

his bareface!!!!!!!!!!! ik i said it before but like!!!! i love it so much!!!!

how he flips his hair and runs his hands through it

that time during BST where his shirt ripped and came undone and he still danced right through it

then he got rly shy and embarrassed after ghdkfgjh omg

the way he looks in baseball caps

yelling “WOOHOOO” “YAAAAAAAHHHHH” while on a rollercoaster like pls hes so cute

“i’m done”

“OH MAN HOLY SHIT” *cue jin choking*

“Hawt sauce”

that handstand flip thing where he flew forward and his hat came off and he yelled after

screamo/rock music thats all im gnna say abt that

THAT FACE HE MADE GOING DOWN THE WATERSLIDE DFGHKFJ

rolex watch like 😪 this fancy guy

when jimin ignored his high five and he pouted like a big sucky

SPEAKING OF WHICH THAT TIME THAT HE PUT HIS HAND OUT FOR JIN TO PASS HIM SOMETHING AND HE GAVE IT TO NAMJOON INSTEAD AND WAS DENIED SO PUT HIS HAND ON TOP OF IT AND PULLED IT BACK INTO HIM

his special individual relationship with each member

like how tae and him have an unnecessarily long handshake

and how he says he likes hoseok’s bed because it smells nice

when he smacked hoseok’s ass SO hard that it echoed through the room

plus how he says he likes to touch the boys butts backstage when hes nervous (????)

master of girl group dances tbh

“He is a very dangerous guy”

how he holds microphones at the very top sdfgkjd

hes admitted to being hot blooded

his low alcohol tolerance

like im convinced he fcked some shit up and thats why they dont really drink as a group anymore

When he was still in school n someone asked him how his test went and he literally laughed

able to fall asleep everywhere?

when he couldn’t eat donuts n he kept smelling them and groaning

the way he rolls his underwear up in a ball when he washes them

laundry expert

like loves laundry???

husband material tbh

literally breaking his phone all the time

like hes always dropping it and smashing it

yet he still doesn’t wear a case on it

like the time he chased one of the members and it smashed onto the ground after falling out of his pocket and he still didn’t stop because he was dedicated

or the time he was just sitting and it literally fell out the back of the chair lmao

During For You performance where he went to sit down and he MISSED

when he was playing with a balloon during a fansign and he hit himself in the face and his hat fell off

“oh my gawd”

“are you guys having fun” “oh my god x100000 followed by dying seal noises″

how awkward he looked during AHL like he knew it was trash

when he did an aggressive flying kiss and almost took hoseok out in the process

how he said if he isn’t working himself to death he isn’t working hard enough :(

how he doesn’t use fabric softener for whatever reason so his clothes are always a lil stiff

the fact that he got his face scar from fighting over the computer with his brother

lowkey emo w/ his screamo/punk music

the way he pushes his tongue against the inside of his cheek

how he always cleans the bowling ball in between each turn

and the way his posture is so perfect and his leg goes out behind him

how is ears are always a lil red at the top

how he lets the adjuster strap on the back of his baseball caps stick out instead of tucking it into the back of the hat

wants to be a tattoo artist in 10 years???? mmmmm

or own a duck meat shop??

“I’d rather die than live without passion”

“We’re BTS and we’re soooo good!”

the fact that his favourite movies are Your Name and Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind

the way he fights bugs

the way he hates bugs except for cool beetles

scared of the microwave blowing up (poor bby omg)

PERFORMANCE KING

like honestly his stage presence?? is unbelievable

his acting (idc what anyone says I think it’s cute)

the fact that he rly.... still laughs at fart jokes lmao

nods when hes talking

the way he makes “hm” sounds n clicks his tongue when hes thinking

how hes nice to people even when they treat him horribly

that thing he does with his hand when hes singing where he kinda sticks out his index n thumb and kinda shakes his hands around to the song and the notes

the way he crossed his fingers as they were announcing the top social artist award

his barefaced selcas

his selcas in general

any picture of him ever

okay just him but thats besides the point

throws his whole body into his laughs

or throws his head back

or nods his head when hes laughing too

that one video where hes pulling jimins hair back and is laughing really hard honestly thats my favourite video every i think but i say that about every video

like he literally fell over thats how hard he was laughing

even his finger nails are beautiful

that one picture during that interview where his hand is hovering over the girls shoulder hdfjgn hes so cute

the way he said “good morning everyone” in that one vlive wow

that photoshoot with the pimp coat shfjkdf

how when hes smiling or laughing really hard he gets a rly toothy grin and his mouth opens a little bit so theres a gap

and how he sucks his lips in and gets those dimples when hes trying to stop laughing or smiling and compose himself

how he looks in all black oooohhh my god

like when he wore the leather jacket n the all black and the jeans with the one rip wow

AIRPORT FASHION

way he covers his nose when he yawns

how when he speaks from his heart his voice gets softer

never misses an opportunity to be extra

like in the gayos or run bts where he’ll be all quiet but as soon as an opportunity comes he jumps on it

Staff member accounts have mentioned him helping clean/carry things for them without them asking

he never complains despite all the expectations on him

always striving to always better himself

when he was playing darts and he kept getting them in the centre and he was doing flips and throwing them behind him lmao

when he was trying to reenact speed skating and did that weird thing on the ice omg

naruto run.......

how he looked in the spine breaker mv (u know the part im talking abt)

how he looks up when hes thinking and his eyes shift slightly

“What’s poppin?”

how sometimes he has a double eyelid and sometimes he doesnt

the way his lips pucker out a bit when hes talking

how he threw that opening pitch at that baseball game

and the shy little smile he gave after

n how he practiced his posture before hand

and HOW HARD HE THREW IT

how in the 4th anniversary video he gripped his coffee with both hands

and took little sips

n shook it around in his hand :’(

how soft he looks when he wears open zip sweaters n a plain tshirt underneath

okay but when he randomly broke out some beat boxing

how he rubs the back of his neck when hes thinking about what to say or is nervous

or how he rubs the tops of his legs when hes talking to distract himself

that time taehyung was trying the bottle flip challenge and it took him awhile meanwhile guk comes out n does it in minimal tries

during the muster dvd when he just broke that thing over his head like an animal

when he randomly breaks into dance

that weird squeaky voice he makes when hes imitating jimin

the smug look he gets when he does something RUDE

or when hes showing off lmao

when he was jamming out with headphones on and then took it off and it was justin bieber n he looked so proud and excited

or that one video he took of himself with the mask on in the car and he was barefaced and the sun was covering half his face and his hair was blowing in the wind so gently fdghjdrtkfg

when he was imitating taehyung in that fur coat and was being extra as all hell lmao

when he tucks his shirts into his pants ghsjdfgx (i cant remember if I wrote this already)

how he’s helped with the chorus on SO many of their songs

the way his mouth twitches to the side when hes eating and trying to move the food around

the way the bridge of his nose is always a little shinier than the rest of his face

god i really love his nose and how his nostrils flare out a bit

the way he REALLY listens to people when they talk

like really listens he will put his whole body and soul into listening to you

you can physically see it on his face that his expression changes as the person talks showing that hes actively listening

how he nods and makes complete eye contact

and shifts so that hes facing you

hes just always paying attention to everything and puts so much energy into the things hes focusing on

how his leg steps in front of him when he pitches in baseball

because he puts so much force into the throw

how competitive he is

but not enough to be a complete sore loser

and how hes even started not caring about winning as much

and just having fun

how he blinks slowly and puffs his lips out and clenches his jaw a bit when hes sleeping

or the way his eyes delicately flutter shut when hes fighting how tired he is

how he crosses his arms when hes standing idly

or crosses his hands in front of him overlapping each other when hes waiting

how patient he is and how he never pushes people for things

and is delicate with peoples feelings

then there was bon voyage oohohhh boy okay

so when he and jhope were snuggling hardcore

same with him and v

so basically hes rly snuggly and loves cuddling its confirmed

and in the morning when he woke up and moved his head and his hair was literally ALL over the place like a peacock lmfaoo

the look on his face when he was told not to pack all white shirts

and then he looked at his closet and realized its all white lol

that jumpsuit :(

how he was good at surfing???

like good at everything he puts his mind to

how excited he was when he won being able to eat the entire sandwich and not split it

AND HOW HE SET OFF AN ALARM IN IKEA BY GOING OUT THE EMERGENCY EXIT

how he said his heart felt weird after listening to namjoons message and said he was really sad :’(((

how his voice sounds in that new cover

and those quiet hums

and how he takes a big breath before words

yet its still so soft

and you can literally picture him closing his eyes while singing

hes the most hardworking guy in the entire world

and even when hes super busy he STILL makes sure we’re satisfied and puts us before anything

i love how his hair colour has stayed the same through a lot of comebacks

because every comeback its still just as cute

and hes still just as handsome

the way he intertwines his fingers together sometimes

or puts them behind his back when hes talking (maybe I said this already)

his long breaths after a long practice

his dance covers

how he was shy during that vlive with hoseok and said he wasn’t good at freestyling but he still did his best

wow

i just really love every single little thing about him

hes the most wonderful man on the face of the earth

and I appreciate him to absolutely no end

#armiesnet #bts #jungkook #jeon jungkook #bangtan boys #bangtan #mine

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ts-indonesia · 5 years

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Episode 7: “back on my bullshit™️” - Anabel

After the birthday murder, the cast merged into the Berbagi Bir merge tribe! In a fierce flag-making immunity challenge, Jess got the job done, and earned herself immunity for the round.

As most merge votes are... this round was mess. SO, Matt’s name was one of the earliest thrown out, as one of the quieter members of the tribe, but Matt’s strong social game earlier in the season meant he had allies (like Anabel & Olivia) who did not wanna see that happen.

Potential Vote #2 was Stoner, spearheaded by Anabel, which was leaked (Host Note: I forget who specifically leaked this... lets go with Chris O because one of the confessionals said so) somewhat shooting that plan down.

On an all-returnee call, the vote was settled on Lorelei, as the least connected and least threatening newbie... but... then people did some things. So.. Owen/Stoner decided that returnee kumbaya was no more, and plotted to secretly flip and send out Matt... But that plan relied on the nuCahaya newbie pair sticking to the plan. In fact Trent/Anabel, motivated by Trent’s closeness to Jess/nuCahaya and Anabel’s strong formed relationship with Matt, decided to in fact vote out Lorelei, turning on the newbies, and lying to Owen/Stoner that they were also flipping on NuCahaya.

At tribal, Anabel played her idol, assuming since she just turned on Chris O, he would leak that she had it, and five members of the tribe were blindsided by Lorelei’s exit, with Owen/Stoner vulnerable due to their failed flip...

OLIVIA

Well I wasted my idol and voted out my best friend

Just vote me out now

STONER

https://youtu.be/8YsRquIDBLc

LEIGH

So the vote went exaclty how Trent and Anabel thought it would lmao. I've played too many of these games with aggressive players, it makes me paranoid. Merge time now!

OWEN

I MADE MERGE AGAIN YEEHAW!!!!! The power that that has... I'm quaking honestly. I was completely surprised the other tribe voted Isaac, but in a way I'm relieved because it means I'm not the only one who turned on old Cahaya. I think those tribal lines are going to fade FAST going into this merge... The only worry I have is if they did Isaac because they thought he flipped on Foxx and they're on a witch hunt, but honestly, it's probably just that he was inactive?? Idk. Anabel must've done something to get back into their good graces? We'll see. I'M SO HAPPY THOUGH!! I get to reunite with Olivia and Jess which I LOVE. I just need to explain myself to them about Foxx and they can explain about Isaac and I'm praying it's okay. I really want to stay loyal to Olivia and Matt as long as I can... I also though want to make a group of me/Chris O/Leigh/Lorelei maybe because I truly like all of them and I feel like I have a great 1 on 1 bond with all three. I know that Chris/Leigh at least talk, but I don't have a read on how close Lorelei is with them? We'll see. And it would be nice to pull Jess in to the Matt/Olivia stuff. My problem now is that I'm spreading myself WAY too thin. I have some sort of trust built or at least like cordial conversation built with everyone left except for Michael. It's going to get real fucking messy for me from here on out and it's going to bite me in the ass sooner rather than later because there's a huge chance that, unless something shuffles around, I get caught between two sides and I can't let that expose me so soon. But for now I'm just gonna be social and relax and enjoy talking to these people, because I do really like them a lot.

LORELEI

I made it to merge 😭😭😭 I'm so happy and so proud of myself. I'm so thankful for my alliance with Trent, Chris o, leigh, Anabel and myself. I couldn't have made it here without them. And Owen too, I wouldn't have made it this far if he, Leigh and Chris hadn't managed to flip the vote and vote Foxx (legend) out. I hope I can make it even further!

MICHAEL

One world confessional https://youtu.be/KCz4Lma5f0c

Pre Merge confessional https://youtu.be/vbcNhFsJUVg

OLIVIA

Me: votes out Isaac Me: I wanna talk to ISAAC HE GETS ME Me: it was for the best Me: BRING ME FRIEND

Mmmmmmok so I voted out Isaac, very heartbreaking. I spent all day not doing my homework also.

But now we’ve merged. NuCahaya seems strong. Anabel is excited to work with us and we had a cute ten min call before the tribal and Trent sent a very nice message after, I appreciated that he acknowledged that was hard for me to do.

I wasted my idol, but I think I managed to convince everyone it was a one round only idol lmao. If no one was convinced then oh well. It was so weird like an anxiety monster just took over my body and was like “everyone hates you and if you don’t play your idol you’re OUT” So that’s cute

But anyways. Owen, Matt and I had a very joyous and cute reunion which is interesting since I sorta set owen up as this big ol mastermind with NuCahaya 👀 I painted him as a target for the Foxx vote but he said it was because foxx was throwing around stoner’s name. Stoner was barely around and just went for it apparently. So those three definitely still wanna do like an all veterans thing? (Owen, stoner, Matt). Aaaaand like Jess, Michael, Trent, and Anabel all think we’re a fivesome against Owen and his minions which isn’t exactly the case but may be. Sooooooooooo. Yeah. The fivesome is outnumbered, the veterans aren’t. However Michael and Jess are 100% pro NuCahaya, which I am too. But like I love my dudes too. This vote is gonna change everything because it’s all peaches and cream rn lol. And I’m sorta smack in the middle it feels like with my Owen and Matt alliance which no one knows about and the NuCahaya which I don’t think the veterans would suspect. But I think voting out Isaac safely secured Anabel and Trent with us. I just can’t voice my opinion too much on this vote and I’ve gotta just calm down and fade into the background. Hopefully for now I can keep the delicate balance and we can get Leigh out who isn’t really playing. Jess I told about my idol and she wasn’t too mad at me stupidly playing it I hope lmao. We’re trying to figure out this new idol system together.

I’m sorry Isaac, ily. I hope I can make cutting out my heart in this game worth it.

TRENT

So last night's vote was wild. The awesome foursome wanted to vote out isaac because Anabel is in it. But we needed to do it in a way that Olivia is on board, so we can use her as a number in the future. So we spent hours discussing the pros and cons, which was pointless because jess and michael were going to vote it anyway. Finally at like 8:45 Olivia agrees to vote Isaac. THEN i get a message from leigh and chris who are the infiltrators. They are freaking out because jess and michael won't confirm to vote isaac. They want to flip the vote on Olivia. Which makes no sense but they wanted to do a 3-3-1 tie and then get her out in the tie. Again makes no sense. I finally calm them down and tell them just to trust me and anabel will be safe. And of course at tribal, olivia plays her idol and i freak out thinking we got play, but thank goodness we didnt. Thank goodness we didn't listen to chris or leigh as well because that would have been super awkward to explain. Now we are at merge, and the Charlie alliance is back in business. Somehow we all survived. Even though we were split down the middle with anabel and I being in the minority of the other tribe. Both of our tribes got returnees out. No matter which way you look at it, im at a 6-5 disadvantage. 6 returnees 5 newbies, 6 new obor 5 new cahaya. I just need to survive this next vote and the I think i'll be golden for a little while. I'm hearing some whispering of targeting matt next, and that would be perfect because it gets me to 5-5.

OWEN

Holy shit I just found an idol thank GOD!!!! I’m gonna fuck some shit up with this !!! YEEEEEESSSSS. I’ve officially found one three seasons in a row hehe :’) the grind nvr stops am I right Idk who to tell tho I feel like I need to say something to someone but... Idk. Might be nice to keep to myself

OLIVIA

Real depressed I didn’t win the challenge, spent so long hand drawing it and put a lot of love into it bc I truly love all my tribemates but I know Jess did the same and hers looks cool too. Cannnnot believe I got second again I’ve literally gotten second like every single flag challenge I’ve done 🙄

I had fun drawing today at least, that was a nice change of pace and I’m personally happy with how it turned out so that’s good haha and I realized I’m not half bad I should draw more. I’m always so negative about what I do and think everything looks terrible so I never end up doing anything

I have no idea about this next vote, glad my bff won the challenge. I gotta lay low and make sure it ain’t me. 4 gays + finance manager Trent want Owen or one of his “squad” out. I’m going on call in my owen and Matt alliance tomorrow. Those two and stoner I’m sure wanna realign the veterans and get out a newbie. Maybe I can keep up the façade and direct both into getting out either Lorelei, Leigh, or Chris o (even tho, since getting to know them they’re all so sweet and cool but SOMEONE has to go)

So hopefully that happens. I’ll see what Owen and Matt say tomorrow. As for Chris stoner, who knows 🤷‍♀️

OWEN

i was telling my roommates that I was stressed about this game bc i feel close to too many people and i said im just gonna randomize and the top five ppl on the list ill screw over..... guess whose name was on top? MATT. :o which is a little fitting bc i think it might come down to matt vs leigh tonight. idk it's been SO FUCKING quiet today it's really scaring me. i talked to jess and brought up that i thought matt or leigh will be the targets. she's so freaking sketchy to talk to bc she doesnt want to commit to ANYTHING. like...girl, u got the immunity??? be brave??? speak ur mind???????????????????? but she seemed to be tossing around the idea of doing matt... here's my deal. i love olivia and i even like matt a lot, and I like the torchsnuffers. but rn it seems weaker to move forward with them??? bc i love my bonds with chris o and lorelei.... and stoner of course. basically im in a middle of two sides and the most unanimous I can get rn, the fucking better!1!11 but I dont want to hurt olivia rn... :( GOD!!!!!!!!!!!! this is just all a tangled mess and I dont want to get caught in it too deep but i already AM!!!! if we were zoobeenee this never wouldve happened.... will it be leigh? will it be matt? will it be me?????? not sure. the only thing i know is after tribal tonight im gettin fuckin drunk!

JESS

I GOT IMMUNITY WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU JUDGES <3

MATT

bITCHES Be CONSPIRING AGAINSt ME!!

ANABEL

https://youtu.be/nYZxeLs1hY0

well. maybe the bitches. don’t. wanna. vote. stoner.

OWEN

Duck I am so stressed now The six returnees all called and decided on Lorelei. I’m ducking s reading I wish they decided anabel or something Idk . God dang it..... I don’t want to lose lorelei when she’s been so nice to me and I already saved her on the foxx vote. So I could do two things.... I could vote for Matt with stoner and chris/Leigh/Lorelei and hope that Trent or anabel do too. Then Lorelei is safe but I burn a bridge with olivia and jess which would suck and then I’m giving anabel and Trent a lot of power. I could give Lorelei my idol and tell her to play it on herself and then vote for her to try to save face with the vets but then like what if she tells them I gave it to her or they think I told her to use it.... and also matt would still be gone :( so Idk ughhh and then if that’s the case how to I explain to chris and Leigh why I voted her ???? I want stoner and I to maybe split our vote and then see what Trent an anabel do... idk I can’t decide but omg Trent is calling me. I could also just vote Lorelei and ride it iur

OLIVIA

Truly sorry for my lack of confessionals! Busy day. So I’m pretty confident it’s lorelei but for all we know it could be me! I’m finding myself not as stressed out because I don’t think I’ll EVER be as stressed out as I was with the Isaac vote so even if it’s me, not saying I’ll not be sad, but I’m more at peace. I’ve been on so many calls today jfc. Jess really finessed the hell outta this one with her insanely cool trick to get anabel and Trent to vote Lorelei that was awesome. If I have time later tonight I’ll explain more of what went down today later but until then? Sayonara!

The Isaac vote like changed me as a player it’s wild. I’ve never voted out my closest friend in a game and now I have and like lived through it like I’m?? Ok? Like it was so horrible but it was like digging a bullet out of my heart. It sounds so weird but like it opened up my ability to play without being like insane stressball and hopefully I can carry this through the game. It probably doesn’t make sense but yeah 😂

JESS

I'm tired of sitting around letting games slip through my fingers. This round I have immunity so why not crack a bit? I want that OTT baby! This round is going to be complicated. I don't want Matt to go whatsoever. What a plot twist from the begging of the season? I see no benefit of taking out someone who I believe will be in my corner in this game for a bit? I've compromised enough the last round with taking out Isaac for Trent/Anabel... THIS ROUND IS FOR ME! So I decided to be a rat ass bitch and tell Matt his name was going around. Will this fuck me over next round? Absolutely. Do I care? A lot. Will I regret taking out someone who I see has no benefit to me? NOPE. The way Lorelei and Chris O went about this round rubbed me the wrong way. Chris let me know Matt's name was going around but refused to give me ANY of the details. That just proves to me he does not trust me one bit. Lorelei straight up lied to me so homegirl NEEDS TO GO. Anabel had some genius plan on getting Stoner out (YASSSSSSS). But she didn't listen to me... and told Chris O aka: basically telling Stoner. It obviously got back to Stoner which caused chaos. However, it proved to me that sooo many people are close and exposed relationships. I was able to convince Anabel/Trent to do Lorelei which I hope will work? I don't know. All I know if Lorelei dies in this game I'll be happy. There's only room for one girl from Montréal here :$

OWEN

I have to just make a decision and move forward. After talking to Trent, I think I've decided to do Matt tonight. I feel confident that Trent could be an ally for me. Stoner, Chris O, and Lorelei are all really solid alliances to me right now as well, more than I feel with Michael. I know I'm burning Jess and Olivia and I don't really know what to say to them after. I'm feeling guilty as fuck right now, I wish I didnt put myself in this position. But it's a game, and for me right now, Lorelei is someone I want to go really far with. If they had picked Anabel maybe it would be a different story... Idk. This could still blow up in my face and send me out and honestly??? I'm so exhausted from the last 10 hours i prob wouldnt mind mmmmm ive finally fucking snappt and it's time to follow thru the crazy xo

OLIVIA

Listen, could I technically go to tribal? Yeah but after the damage my anxiety did to me at the last one imma just sit back and let the texts roll in while I do tranquility dot to do puzzles

#whenyourfiresout

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