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a-night-like--this · 2 years

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‘Robert Smith isn’t people’s perceptions’: Stories behind classic photos of The Cure

As the Cure head out on tour across the UK, renowned photographer Tom Sheehan takes us on a trip through some classic pictures of the band.

LAURA KELLY

Tom Sheehan has been taking photos of The Cure since the ’80s. Snatching moments on tour in dressing rooms around the world. Persuading the band to pose in major European cities. Capturing that intense connection Robert Smith has with the camera, and acting as a conduit to the readers of Melody Maker, NME, Sounds and Record Mirror.

Sheehan’s new book The Cure: Pictures of You is a visual record of one of the UK’s most influential bands. As The Cure head out on tour across the UK, Sheehan looks back on his decades of working with the band to share his memories and the behind-the-scenes stories of some of his favourite shots.

The first time I met Robert [Smith] and Lol [Tolhurst, the Cure’s former drummer] was at the Shepherds Bush Hilton in 1982. The Cure were supporting the Banshees, and Robert was also playing in the Banshees so he was a tired boy, I guess.

We were under the cosh because they were about to head off to soundcheck. So, my journalist colleague got about 20 minutes on tape. I got a few frames of them going through a revolving door going out of the hotel. When I look at those pictures, I see there’s a lot of humour going on.

On that half roll of film, the majority of them they’re larking about and Robert was smiling. It was a very comfortable entry into the world of The Cure. There’s that kind of rolling humour that The Cure have, which, luckily for me, I seem to have tapped into from our very first encounter. The perception of Robert at that time wasn’t a very happy guy. He isn’t what people’s perceptions of him are.

Prior to a band recording or doing a gig or whatever, there’s always a little bit of camaraderie. You’re setting things up and there might be a little bit of joshing going on, but the minute you start rolling, you’re working. I’m performing as much as they are. They’ve got to respond to me.

Robert does have a reputation for being a control freak, but I think he hands over the baton to whoever is working with. He ain’t going to leap through hoops of fire, and it was never in my modus operandi to get pictures that made the turn look foolish. But I think he trusts people that he knows can do the job.

The Cure on tour: Robert Smith in Bologna. Photo: Tom Sheehan

Robert Smith enjoys the sculptures in Bologna: The Cure on tour in Italy, June 1984

This was on The Top tour. I joined them in Italy. They were quite a tight band. There’s always this thing when you join a band on tour, even if they know you a bit, you still feel like the outsider because you’re not part of the gang. Although you might be an honorary member for two or three days, you’re an outsider. It’s like you can’t argue with a married couple. It’s the same with any band, you know: they’ve got their own lingo, their own ways. You’re witnessing it, but you’re actually outside of it. And you’ll never be able to penetrate it.

That statue with a fountain is in Bologna, and it’s on a Sunday morning. The day before, the gig was great… but earlier on in the day, Robert had a dicky tummy. I think he’d eaten a dodgy prawn or something and he was laying on the on the dressing room floor, groaning in pain prior to soundcheck.

He recovered enough the next morning to go out. But it was a case of, let’s nail it. So that was just a quick once around the block and take some pictures. It was really fortuitous that there was some nice architecture around to utilise.

Lol Tolhurst and Robert Smith. Photo: Tom Sheehan

A cheeky moment with Robert Smith and Lol Tolhurst: The Cure on tour in Italy, June 1984

I have a history of them doing stuff [for other photographers] and me walking in and taking over the studio. There was this really famous Italian photographer who was shooting them for a really high-end publication. This guy was set up and then he was done, and he was talking to his assistant. I just shifted the lights around a bit, and whacked off a couple of frames. That was on the hoof, you know? If something presents itself, you just go to go, there you go chaps. And bang, bang, bang. This picture is the one Lol used on the cover of the UK version of his biography, Cured: The Tale of Two Imaginary Boys.

A dressing room portrait. Photo: Tom Sheehan

Getting Robert out of bed: The Cure on tour in Brussels, November 1987

It was a Saturday night, they played some club in Brussels which I can’t recall. We’re in the dressing room and Robert’s sorting out his hair and all that stuff. I’ve just got a couple of plastic backgrounds on a wall and I’m just saying, “Robert, the blue one.” I’m getting them as they’re ready.

If they’re getting ready for a show, they don’t really want me in their in their hair as well. So I pinned up two backgrounds next to each other so I could switch, one to the other. Then the Melody Maker’s got a choice of colours.

Those pictures have quite clear lighting, they’re quite defined. Good for a cover, perhaps. But I was gagging for something in daylight. So, I said to Robert, can we meet tomorrow lunchtime? I get there at one or two o’clock, and the bugger’s still in bed. It was in November, and it was getting dark. So, I thought I better go from street level up to the roof. And then Robert turns up and it’s that classic kind of ‘Tommy, do I really have to be here?’ kinda look. This kind of weathered, aged, ‘is this totally necessary?’ look. I always remember it, because it doesn’t look as dark as it was getting… or maybe it was just my sheer panic.

Eye contact is vital to make a photo work on the newsstand. Photo: Tom Sheehan

‘Give us your eyes’: The Cure on tour in France, 1989

This was a swifty – dive in and dive out. You can’t take a photograph of The Cure in their fatigues. You can’t do it until he’s ready, in the sense of made up, ready to go. The eyes are on, the lips on, the hair’s done. If they if they’ve got a gig coming, I have to be quite economical with the time because they’re on stage in 30 minutes.

Robert is really good at connecting with the camera. He knows what’s required. It’s not like the [Melody] Maker was some sort of art magazine. You couldn’t have some enigmatic, looking-at-the-stars shot, because it’d be too dark and the ink would fuck up. A lot of time it had to be quite clean.

When Melody Maker, along with the NME and Sounds and Record Mirror, was sitting with a multitude of other magazines on the news stand at Tottenham Court Road when you come out of the tube station, you’ve got to be able to see those minces [mince pies, rhyming slang for eyes] on the other side of the road. Every time I’m working with a man, whoever I’m photographing, I say, give us your eyes. Unless you got eye contact, you can’t expect people to look at it the same way.

Sometimes when you look into the lens and look into their eyes, it is a bit of a staring competition. With Robert I think he’s always been confident. I mean, God knows what he thinks about in his own time, but when he’s working his confidence is great. He’s always appeared to be older than his years as well.

A big day out to Westbury White Horse with the Cure. Photo: Tom Sheehan

Robert’s side hustle as a National Trust guide: The Cure in southwest England, 1995

This was a great day out. The band were done in the southwest recording [the album Wild Mood Swings] in that actress’s house [Jane Seymour’s house, St Catherine’s Court in Somerset]. I came down when they’d been stuck in the studio for a couple of weeks, so I’m sure they wanted a distraction. In other words, taking the piss out of a mature lensman. So, off we went.

Robert was, and probably still is, a member of the National Trust. So he had it all worked out, where we’re were going. We got in a van and we just travelled around. We went to Cheddar Gorge and all round that area. Robert had made a few notes, so he’d be looking at the map, and saying, “Coming up is…”

The horse doesn’t have any hidden meaning. It’s just the British countryside. But I like to think it confused a lot of people overseas, in Japan or whatever.

The Cure at Westside Studios. Photo: Tom Sheehan

Music icons: The Cure in Westside Studios, London, 2005

It was 2005, and The Cure were in Westside Studios recording. I was taking a picture of Robert with a copy of Bowie’s …Ziggy Stardust… for series of portraits on music icons and the records that inspired them. I said to him, “let’s get a couple of other portraits while we’re here”. There was this spiral staircase outside, so we headed there. Robert said to me “you’ll do better getting me from above…” and he was right. I like taking photos from above, you get a better line on people’s jaw. Their faces look better.

I think Robert worked out his relationship between him and the camera. I mean, he got his whole thing together, didn’t he? With the hair and the lips and the clobber. If you’ve got all that stuff around, you could confuse the viewer. So I’d always say, I still want the eyes. I want that contact.

The Cure: Pictures of You by Tom Sheehan, with a foreword by Robert Smith, is published November 3, 2022.

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honourablejester · 11 months

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While we’re on this topic of old films we watched and enjoyed, some random movie recs from the 1910s through to the 1970s based on the things that popped into my head fastest. Warning in advance, I like horror, noir, swashbucklers, dark comedy and dodgy fantasy films.

1910s

Fantômas serials (1913/1914) – As I said in the previous post, if you ever get a random hankering for silent-era pulpy French crime thrillers, these are an excellent start.

1920s

Metropolis (1927) – the imagery in this movie is absolutely stunning, even if the morals are extremely heavy-handed. Worth it for the Robot Maria transformation sequence alone. Also, and I feel mean for thinking this, because the poor man’s going through hell, but there are moments where Freder is truly hilarious. And also, Batman: The Animated Series owes so much, visually, to this movie. It single-handedly shape a vision of what cities and the future and architecture and transport could look like.

Nosferatu (1922) – imagery. The Germans were so fucking good at imagery in early cinema. Admittedly the movie does some very strange things to the Dracula mythos, and is probably the source of a lot of later ideas of him that have nothing to do with the novel (the sunlight thing), but it’s so cool.

1930s

M (1931) – Peter Lorre is incredible. And actually the whole set up of this movie is so creepy and tense and enthralling, and then the court scene busts it wide open. Deals with some heavy things, including child murder, vigilante justice and mental illness, but it’s so good. And you will never hear ‘Hall of the Mountain King’ the same way again.

The Thin Man (1934) and sequels – they’re half hardboiled noir and half screwball comedy, but they’re not a parody, because they predate most of the noir genre, so this is more of a funny hybrid precursor series. And they’re really funny. If you just want some pep and jazz in your life, a good time for an hour or so, totally watch these, they’re adorable.

The Prisoner of Zenda (1937) – Okay. I just like a good swashbuckler? You will see Zenda several times on this list, because I enjoy a lot of versions of this, but of all of them you need to start with this one, because Douglas Fairbanks Jnr. No one else will ever do Rupert of Hentzau like him. If you like your charming, snarky villains, if you like your Lokis, Rupert of Hentzau. Douglas Fairbanks Jnr. If you also like your villain and your hero to have powerful sexual tension and lean very close to each other while crossing blades, again. Rupert of Hentzau. Just watch. You’ll see.

Son of Frankenstein (1939) – I’m not going to lie, I watched this movie purely to see where Young Frankenstein (1974, also very much worth a look) was getting a lot of its in-jokes and gags from (Inspector Kemp in YF is riffing off Inspector Krogh in this movie). But it is worth watching wholly on its own merits. Among other things, Inspector Krogh is a genuinely cool and compelling character (as a kid, the monster ripped his arm out during its first rampage, and during this movie Krogh fully stands up to that childhood nightmare and has a cool moment with his prosthetic arm), and if you have any interest in Basil Rathbone, Boris Karloff or Bela Lugosi, this movie is fantastic. Lugosi in particular as Igor does so much in this movie. If all you picture when you think of him is Dracula, try this. (And The Black Cat (1934), which also has Karloff and Lugosi, but is significantly more intense).

1940s

The Mark of Zorro (1940) – Okay. I like swashbucklers. I like movie sword fights. This movie has the best movie sword fight ever. Basil Rathbone vs Tyrone Power. No contest. And, I mean, yes, the rest of the movie is also good. But watch it for the sword fight. Perfection.

The Wolf Man (1941) – This movie and Casablanca between them gave me a bit of a thing for Claude Rains. I don’t know, he’s just really compelling to watch. Very soft-spoken, but very there. And if you want the tragedy of the werewolf curse, this is the movie that started it all. This is not a monster movie. This is a psychological horror story of one man breaking apart under the burden of a curse. It’s so good.

Casablanca (1942) – I mean, it’s everyone’s answer. It’s stereotypical, the classic movie. But it is very, very good. Extremely quotable. I wish to punch Rick in the face several times over. And Claude Rains as Renault is so sleazy, but also so compelling.

Arsenic & Old Lace (1944) – If you ever wondered what the deal with Cary Grant was. This movie. His face. The whole movie just rides on his face. His reactions, his body language. I mean, the movie does a lot of things spectacularly. If you enjoy dark comedy, this is the pinnacle. Hiding bodies in window seats, kill count competitions between a psychotic criminal and his maiden aunts, the extremely morbid running gags of ‘yellow fever’ and Teddy charging up the stairs and the elderberry wine. But really it’s all Cary Grant and his fucking expressions. There are several points in this movie where I can’t breathe. For a man with so many suave, serious leading roles, his physical comedy was incredible.

The Big Sleep (1946) – This was the movie that introduced me to noir. Not the Maltese Falcon, not Double Indemnity, not Sunset Boulevard. This one. The Big Sleep. And you can argue that it’s not the best of the noirs, it’s a bit too caught up in itself, the plot if you pay attention has some big holes in it, and if you compare it to the book one female character in particular got rather cheated. But. As an introduction. It does land, very definitely. Bumpy Go-Cart (sorry, Humphrey Bogart) and Lauren Bacall are all that and then some. If you want to pick a noir, you can do a lot worse.

1950s

The Prisoner of Zenda (1952) – Mostly I like this as a compare/contrast to the 1937 one. It’s damn near a shot-for-shot remake, and while that could be a bad thing, it’s fascinating what differences and interpretations show up because of that. Watch the ’37 one first, and then watch this one. It’s just cool to compare them. And, you know. It’s still a really fun swashbuckler.

The Court Jester (1955) – Just the best time. The best. I have an unreasonable amount of fondness for this film, this gentle send-up of previous swashbucklers and period dramas in the vein of The Adventures of Robin Hood, and basically every movie Basil Rathbone ever made. Watch it for Danny Kaye, watch it for the tongue twisters, watch it for a baby Angela Lansbury, watch it for an absolutely hysterical duel scene, watch it for Maid Jean being the single most competent character there. Just watch it. I cannot entertain criticism on this point. It’s excellent, and I’m not sane about it.

Some Like It Hot (1959) – Jack Lemon is going to show up again later in this list, and for good reason, (as is Tony Curtis, but we don’t care as much about him), but Some Like It Hot is also, for a 1959 movie, a really gentle, funny, interesting look at gender roles? I mean, the premise is two dudes going undercover as female musicians with an all-female band to avoid mob hitman, and one of them keeps getting hit on by rich man while the other struggles to get it on with Marilyn Monroe in his male persona while trying to hide from mob assassins in a female persona, so it could be such a hot mess, but it actually … It’s quite gentle. Marilyn’s Sugar gets to talk about what men expect when they see her and, because he’s pretending to be a woman, Tony Curtis’ Joe has to listen to her, Jack Lemmon’s Jerry/Daphne gets to get genuinely swept up in the feeling of being romanced as a woman to the point that he’s semi-seriously talking about marriage, and in the end, when Jerry reveals he’s a man to Osgood, the rich old idiot who’s been trying to romance ‘Daphne’, Osgood famously just goes ‘well, nobody’s perfect’, and still appears perfectly willing to marry ‘her’. I mean, it has its issues still, but there’s such a lot of gentleness in it for a comedy movie made in 1959.

1960s

The Innocents (1961) – One of my two all-time favourite horror movies, on raw atmosphere alone. It’s so eerie. SO EERIE. It’s horrible and twisted and goes heavy places (child death, a child acting ambiguously sexually while possibly possessed, strong questions of sanity), but it’s done so gracefully and gently and eerily. If Gothic Horror is of interest to you as a genre, if you enjoyed Crimson Peak, try this. It is all beautiful sunshine and sprawling lawns and twisted desires and paranoid terrors and the single eeriest scene I’ve ever seen in anything ever. Watch the lake scene. It’s stunning.

The Raven (1963) – Pivoting back to comedy horror, this time with added fantasy. Vincent Price has been in a lot of better movies, but I’m not sure if he’s been in many funnier ones. Him and Peter Lorre just own this movie. Wall to wall ham. Just. Just go in, just watch it. There’s a loose frame plot of duelling magicians, vague references to Poe’s ‘The Raven’, Boris Karloff returning as a villain, animal transformations, and the obligatory young romance getting embroiled in their sorcerous parents’ plots (although, jarringly, the young romantic lead is a baby Jack Nicholson, which sure gives it a weird vibe), but honestly? You’re here for Vincent Price and Peter Lorre and the wizard duel.

The Great Race (1965) – Jack Lemmon is back, as is Tony Curtis, but we only care about the former of those, because Professor Fate (obligatory shouting). Okay. I don’t know how many people remember the old Hanna-Barbera Wacky Races cartoons? Am I aging myself here? But this is the movie they were based on, and Professor Fate is who Dick Dastardly was based on. The premise is a 1910s global car race between Curtis’ Great Leslie (you will want to punch him, and that’s perfectly natural) and Lemmon’s Professor Fate, an exaggerated eccentric conman and cheater and over the top cartoon villain of man, and you will love him. He’s the best thing in it. But there’s also Natalie Woods as the reporter who also enters the race, and a young Peter Falk as Fate’s sidekick Max. That’s a baby Columbo as the ‘villain’s more competent henchman. AND. For me, for bonus points, a huge section at the end of the rest is basically a whole-plot Prisoner of Zenda reference in which Professor Fate is the hero. Look. Look. Do you ever want to watch a live-action cartoon? This is that movie. Trust me. It’s fantastic. The romance has aged terribly, you will want to throw Leslie off a cliff, it has several extremely sixties tropes in it, but it’s that movie. Watch it. Have fun.

1970s

The Golden Voyage of Sinbad (1973) – Right. So. 70s fantasy movie. Not politically correct in the slightest, and some extremely unfortunate choices were made in it. But. Ray Harryhausen. Stop motion fantasy effects of awesome. And, also, I just really enjoyed the character of the Vizier. He doesn’t really get to do anything, he’s kinda just set-dressing, but he is the horrifically maimed advisor to the king who fell afoul of our sorcerous villain, and he has a cool golden mask to cover his scars, and you think he’s going to turn out to be treacherous but no, he’s rock-solid calm and noble and helpful the entire way through, and I just really really like him. The image of him stuck in my head for years.

Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975) – My other all-time favourite horror movie, and again it’s the eeriness. Pure eeriness. Nothing happens in this movie. There’s no monsters, there’s no explanations. 3 girls go missing on a rock in early 1900s Australia, in the midst of baking heat and sunshine and the looming shape of a volcanic geological formation, and the movie just follows their society unravelling in the aftermath. No one knows what happened. Grief and terror and unanswered questions destroy people. Reactions, prejudice, respectability and hidden flaws, loss of innocence, the unpredictable reactions of people unstrung by grief and fear, all of it snowballs in the wake of the disappearances, and over it all looms the sunshine and the rock. The score and the cinematography of this movie work so well to create this pervasive, eerie, unreal mood, this sense of something watching, this ancient force presiding over the unravelling of the false civilisation layered over top of it. I fucking love this movie. It’s stunning.

Assault on Precinct 13 (1976) – A rather big jump in genres, we’re back to crime thrillers here, which we haven’t really touched since the 1910s on this list, but the sustained tension in this movie is par excellence. The opening half hour. A theme for the seventies movies on this list is going to be sunshine and drifting tension, and Precinct 13 does it so well. Heat, claustrophobia, urban isolation, siege mentality. And the character relationships that develop inside that siege mentality, the alliances and bedrock life-or-death trust that evolves between enemies, and then are brutally cut short by the re-establishment of the outside world at the end, the rude reintroduction of law and connectedness and social consequences, is just … amazing. The movie is a heat dream, a bubble of disconnectedness and violence and blood and faith, and then the ‘real’ world slams back down at the end. It’s good. It’s so well paced. Watch this movie.

Nosferatu (1979) – Just to, again, tie things back to the earlier entries on this list. Werner Herzog’s 70s remake of Nosferatu was actually the first version I saw, as it was considerably easier to get hold of. And it stuck. Even after seeing the original. And a lot of that, I think, was because of the opening, which is just spectacularly eerie. The drifting, eerie music, the monastic chant, the heartbeat under it, the panning shots of the mummies in the catacombs (which are from Mexico, but howandever). I mean, there are a lot of problems with this movie, Werner Herzog is not exactly the most upright and sensitive of dudes, (and it added some more questionable elements to the Dracula mythos), but for sheer imagery and tone-setting, this opening was incredible. And the movie does keep that tone, that eerie drifting, especially once Dracula starts bringing the plague behind him. Again, the 70s theme of sunshine and eeriness. It’s worth a look.

#movie recs #classic movies #1910s #1920s #1930s #1940s #1950s #1960s #1970s #horror #swashbucklers #crime thrillers #fantasy #noir #comedy #random selection based on my idiosyncratic memory

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flutenby · 1 year

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Umk thoughts:

No-one deserved to come last, it was such tough competition. Like yes Kaarija was a very deserved winner, but everyone else was also great and would've done well at Eurovision. Generally vocals were much better than last year, but the camera work was a bit dodgy

Robin: I still hate the words he sings, but if it wasn't in english then this would be an absolute guilty pleasure. He was a little pitchy, but he has so much charisma, and I think this was one of the best stagings tonight. It matched the song well, looking professional but also fun. Again I can't ignore how much I hate the words, but I did actually enjoy this otherwise

Kuuma: I loved the camera cuts in the 2nd verse, really effective. Singer was bang on the whole time which was great. Visually they had a strong opening, but the final but when they walk around the stage it looks kinda flat and aimless. I also just kinda forget about the song, like it's pleasant but doesn't make a huge impact for me

Kaarija: First up the song is an absolute banger ofc. And I love the lil dance in the poppy part at the end, and the train. However something isn't quite right with the dancers in the opening. There's too much of them or their facial expressions don't work, but definitely some changes need to be made. I'm also a bit worried that I couldn't hear his live vocal very much. I'm hoping that gets a bit clearer at Liverpool and they fix up the staging, but this is still my fav selected song at the moment.

Keira: choreo and visuals were better than Bess last year, but I don't like the song as much. A little pitchy but not tooo bad. I don't think Keira hit the right attitude in some places, and she instead looked bored and not in a cool way. She needed to do some vocal gymnastics at the end to give it a bit more life

Benjamin: this was my personal favourite going in, but I knew to be worried about the live vocal. Considering what I was concerned about, he actually did better than I expected. Not perfect, but it definitely sounds like he did a lot of prep and it worked. I also like the new take on doable vocal gymnastics at the end - I don't think it worked quite perfectly but I liked the intention and shape. I'm so mad about the camera work just not being slick enough - it did detract from what was otherwise amazing staging. Not having backup dancers was a bold move but I think the correct one - they would've distracted from him and his energy. And yes work those light poles! I loved the staging concept, altho I think it could have been just a little lighter so we could see his face just a little more in parts. Ultimately that was a pretty minor concern tho, and this did not deserve last imo. It's interesting how polarised the juries were on it - some 0 points and some 12 points. Still mad about the camerawork, but otherwise I really enjoyed this and I hope he comes back in a couple of years

Lxandra: this is one of my favourite ballads ever I think, just so beautiful. The staging was really tasteful and well done - the moment when the sheets fell was such a moment. Her vocal was 99% perfect and she's really emotive. Why did the public put it last, that was an absolute tragedy. She's incredible and this was basically a perfect performance to me.

Portion boys: this was the most fun, their energy is so infectious and I just had an incredible time watching. I'm obsessed with the segway drums, absolutely inspired move. If this had won I couldn't even be mad because it'd be a guaranteed fun song I'd enjoy. Absolute banger, would love to see them live bc I think it'd be pure fun

#umk #eurovision 2023 #esc #finland #me ranting sorry

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adamwatchesmovies · 2 years

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My Life as a Zucchini (2016)

My Life as a Zucchini was nominated for an Oscar in 2016's “Best Animated Film” category but ever since Shark Tale, that Award's reputation has been dodgy. Does this picture stand toe-to-toe with Zootopia and Moana, or was it a scramble to find 5 nominees?

Orphaned after his perpetually drunk mother falls down the stairs, Icare “Zucchini” (voiced by Erick Abbate in the English Dub, by Gaspard Schlatter in the Original French) is sent to an orphanage. There, he experiences the same joys and sorrows all children do while waiting for a family to adopt him.

What you’ll notice about this French/Swiss production from the first frame are its visuals. Even in a year that featured wonderful CGI Imagery, traditional animation courtesy of Wild Bunch/Studio Ghibli, and another great picture by Laika, My Life as a Zucchini stands out. The colors, character designs, and overall style are so perfectly suited to the story anyone suggesting anything else would seem like pure idiocy. With their exaggerated proportions and color-coded features, the characters evoke children’s drawings - the ones you used to do when you couldn’t count so everyone got about a dozen fingers on each hand - polished and brought to life. Instantly, you're transported to a time of innocence and simple joys, but there’s more to this film than basic emotions.

The silly-sounding title may lead you to believe that this is a picture for little kids, but you'd be wrong. Inside the adorable children living at the orphanage are feelings that would be difficult to handle even for adults. I wouldn’t recommend it for those under the age of 10, but for everyone else, wow. It’s both hilarious and heartbreaking that Zucchini has an empty beer can and a drawing of a superhero as mementos representing his dead mother and long-absent father. Without ever being sappy, forced, or cloying, the film turns towards you and opens its arms. All you can do is open yours in return and give it a big, warm hug. You’ll laugh at the children’s silly games, the way they ask each other about life’s big questions, and their wild logic-defying antics… until you start to think about them. At that point, you might be brought to tears.

It’s ultimately pointless to try and avoid falling in love with the characters of My Life as a Zucchini. I don’t know if I would’ve selected it as my pick for the best animated film of 2016, but it certainly would've been a contender. This is an excellent film, so bold in its visuals and so rich in heart. I had to jump through all sorts of hoops to see it and they were all worth it. When you check it out, stick around for the end credits. There’s a scene at the very end that gives us some insight into the process that brought this story to life. (Original French version on the big screen, October 7, 2017)

#My Life as a Zucchini #movies #films #movie reviews #film reviews #ma vie de courgette #claude barras #celine sciamma #germano zullo #morgan navarro #gaspard schlatter #sixtine murat #paulin jaccound #michel vuillermoz #2016 movies #2016 films #animated movies #animated films

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pilotheather · 2 years

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OH FUCKING YESSS THANK GOD. WE GET TO USE THE TIMELORD CYBERMEN SO COOL IM GLAD THEY JUST DIDNT DITCH THAT CONCEPT

also love these designs for real

actually take that back this cunts just come into focus

i justsaw the spiky arm bits those looked class to me

BRO IS DAN DHYING CAN U HELP HIM

i'll be real i think one thing i will say is like.. i dont completely RATE the visuals of the chibnall era-and ive said why, with a lot of them ultimately bein very shallow despite being pretty, yada yada, BUT... i like how theyre not DARK-dark. u kno what i mean. they are always very colours and gorgeous even if a lot of the time its just sort of silly.

okay funny bit why does no one appreciate dans funny bit

CAN I SAY

DAN

LIKE THE FACT HES STILL HERE IS SO FUNNY TO ME. SORRY. LIKE I DO LIKE THE LNINES HE GETS BUT FUCK ME MAN . HALF THE TIME HES SO-

okay sorry liveblogging so theres a kid. cool. wtf was that. timeless child stuff? maybe .

alright break time

SO AS I WAS SAYING THE FACT DAN IS STILL HERE IS SO FUCKINH FUNNY BC LIKE... I GENUINELY KINDA FORGOT HE EXISTED. LIKE he has fine moments but also its like god why IS he here man...... I DONT KNOW! HE DOESNT REALLY CONNECT TO ANYTHING!

hang on now we're getting a fucking dan moment. nevermind. fi-

AHIDUVNSPIEIPFISEJPIPDJIP

"YOU SDONT HAVE TO COMEBACK FOR ME"

THATS SO FUNNY I WAS ABOUT TO SAY LIKE. WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A DAN MOMENT WOW FINALLY BEFORE HE LEAVES BUT NOPE. JUST LET HIM GO. CLASS. BYE DAN. HE FUCKING STEPPED ONTO THE SHOW BREATHED AND BYEEEEE LOL

YAZ PLEASE

SO HES JUST LEAVING? NOW? OKAY BUT THAT IS SO FUCKINH HILARIOUS. BRILLIANT.

oh classic are we going to get more funny whittaker era flimsy morals. sorry thats mean. but also come on man. you know what i mean. arghgh dont fucking genocide the daleks [willlater genocide the daleks]

is this the master....

yes;.

YEP.

DID THEY GIVE HIM BLUE EYES.THATS SO SCARY. STOP THA ODNT DO THAT THATS SOSCARY SASCHA BABYGIRL WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOUUUUUUUUU

DONT

DONTFOCUS ON THEM.

SCARY. SCARY. SCARY INTJ SCARE. STARE. AHHHH. EEEEEEEEEK.

the joker ⤵️

OKAY SORRY BUT THE CAPE..

KIND OF EATING... I HAVE TO BE HONEST. the headpiece is still really .. dodgy . it looks like someones got a doily, stiffened it and wacked it onto the back of its head with a pritt stick.

okay this was my concern just jumping about like a mad man okay holy shit theres one thing like its ONE thing to like ... purposefully try to, like, be a bit insane and disjointed but god the way theyrejust ....

yaz: 😬

HANG ON

hang on

HANG ON

OKAY HE LOOKS SOOOO GOOD WITH THE HAIR AND THAT GLASSES ... CANT EVEN BE MAD ABOUT THAT. HAIR AND SUIT- HE LOOKS TOO GOOD, FRANKLY.

wow! im sure that staticky thing will have no relevance later! really fucking subtle, writers!

alright master. sure.

GOD. I HATE CHIBNALL HUMOUR.

"pinky promisey" i like that

GIVE HER A GUN?

SORRY? GIVE HER A GUN? RIGHT.. EHRM. SURE.

ANYWAY. MESSY ASS CHIBNALL ERA MORALS. GOD LOVE THEM.

god the pacing on this gthing is bloody boring

we've had 30 minutes of fucking setup. epic. and we're setting MORE up. i told you fucking hell too much SHITE packed in....

"you were HALF CAT." "mans allowed to experiemnt 😼" okay that made me grin. miaow.

okay but for real how is there so much fluff here and yet its just random jumping about and yaz is so right just going from point a to b with no explanation also like if this is what ur trying to evoke FROM the episode ur just not pulling it off man its like so dry thus far i dont even CARE sorry . SORRY

i dont get why they bring old companions back sometimes, man. it just feels so... pointless-0

BP9FJA

FJ9PAJDPGPJDGSOIGJDGJSDDOIJPAJODGJJOGDJOAS THAt eff e ctIMG OGIGNG TOT THROWURPR

DDODIDIDIIDJKDBELELEHEBENELEKEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

EHBBWKWKQLQLSOSIASO

HEPHLP HELPHLEPH ELPHELHP ELP THAT WAS THE FUNNIES TUFKCING THING IVE EVER SEEN

GOD WHO CARES

DOES THIS FUCKING EPISODE HAVE ANY EMOTIONAL HEART TO IT

ITS BEEN 40 MINUTES

THATS AN EPISODE OF FARSCAPE YOU KNOW IVE BEEN WATCHING FARSCAPE AND IM THINKING OF ALL THE THINGS THEY CAN DO IN AN EPISODE OF FARSCAPE AND GOD.

i think the traitor storyline could have been actually interesting sorry who gives a damn about the rest of this crap. i dont know. i suppose actually having an idea and investing it and exploring it to any deeper level than having shit randomly fucking fly across the screen would be too much to fucking ask

ALSO THE FUCKING

YAZ BIT. CAN WE GO BACK TO THAT. I LIKED THE YAZ DEVELOPMENT. WHY ARE.

UGH.

SORRY IM just. i dont care . im so sorry i dont even want to pretend to careany more its going to be over in 50 minutes

i forgot ...that guy was there...

also the rasputin bit its slaying a bit actually i will give them that but nothing about the delivery of it its like the lights and dancing this could

it would be so funny if literally whittaker never came back after this bit

SORRY I FEEL LIKE

IVE BEEN ZONING OUT

THE PACING ON THIS THING FUCKING SUCKS

LIKE IT OBJECTIVELY FUCKING SUCKS

I KNOW IM SUPPOSED TO CARERIGHT NOW I FUCKING DONT

anwyay as i wanted to say earlier. i dont GET why they bring back old companions, just.... because. do you know what i fucking mean? like- when sarah jane first came back, that was the story. it had the space to explore that properly... it had intention. now we justfucking drag em in . do the obligatory "woah, you LEFT us. lets make the other companion feel like shit also." and thats it and they never... and ITS LIKE SORRY BUT WHAT IS THEIR STORY ACTUALLY CONTRIBUTING TO THIS EPISODE? OTHER THAN TAKING UP TIME?

LIKE WHY IS VINDER HERE, ALSO? WHO CARES EITHER? CAN WE JUST STREAMLINE THIS THING AND ACTUALLYFOCUS ON SOEMTHING.

BC LIKE... RIGHT NOW ITS JUST SO W EIRD.

even graham coming back. what is he going to BRING to it. like- i dont know man. we had the end of s5, where they all came together, but it was so much better paced over those two episodes where they all had a solid purpose in the thing and their own proper story instead of just standing there and saying hohhh im HERE. [makes a reference] . and their stories all connected properly whereas like

now its just a load of fucking

okay im going to be honest

i stopped talking in here now bc i started rambling on discord but literally

i dont. czare i dont even care

sorry

goodnight

#Egg.txt #doctor who liveblog

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denimbex1986 · 6 months

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'Pre-release buzz around the second Doctor Who 60th anniversary special, “Wild Blue Yonder,” hinted that it would break new ground for the long-running sci-fi franchise.

The hype started with star David Tennant, who got the ball rolling when he described the “Wild Blue Yonder” as “unlike any Doctor Who episode ever” in an October 2023 interview.

Then there was the BBC’s “Wild Blue Yonder” media blackout – a surefire way to stoke speculation if ever there was one. After all, when a broadcaster is so eager to keep a lid on spoilers, that’s typically a sign that there is indeed something worth spoiling.

Yet, now that “Wild Blue Yonder” is finally here, it’s hard to see what all the fuss was about. Sure, it’s a gripping enough hour of TV, but nothing in this Doctor Who special represents uncharted territory for the franchise...

A big little Doctor Who adventure

“Wild Blue Yonder” finds the Fourteenth Doctor (Tennant) and Donna Noble (Catherine Tate) stranded on a deserted spaceship at the edge of the universe. To escape, they’ll have to solve the mystery of what happened to the crew. And, if that wasn’t enough, a pair of malevolent shapeshifters show up who can copy the Doctor and Donna’s likenesses, adding an extra layer of paranoia to proceedings.

As such, the second Doctor Who 60th anniversary special is effectively a bottle episode. Or at least, it would be, if the BBC and Disney hadn’t clearly spent a fortune on mechanized corridors and body horror transformations. What’s more, it’s a pretty good bottle episode, giving Tennant and Tate the better part of an hour to showcase both their individual acting chops and their dynamite chemistry together.

Tennant in particular benefits from the stripped-down nature of the “Wild Blue Yonder” narrative, which gives us our first proper glimpse behind the Fourteenth Doctor’s cheery facade. Previous special “The Star Beast” teased that all is not well with the Doctor, but here Tennant, showrunner Russell T Davies, and director Tom Kingsley more fully lay the Time Lord’s pain bare.

The trauma that the Doctor’s been literally and figuratively running from is tied to his past – and an especially polarizing bit of franchise canon – so having him face up to it surrounded by evil facsimiles of himself and his best mate is an effective choice. It also allows Tennant and Tate to break bad, and you can see how much they relish playing opposite each other (and themselves) in villain mode.

If you’ve seen The Thing, you’ve seen Wild Blue Yonder

Unsurprisingly, these scenes are a blast, even when they’re let down by CGI so ropey it’s cringeworthy rather than creepy (or even cute). Not that the Doctor and Donna’s dodgy doppelgangers are the only offenders in this regard, though. For every dazzling shot of an exploding spaceship in “Wild Blue Yonder,” there’s several more of Tennant and Tate hoofing it down hallways obviously added via greenscreen.

But it’s not uneven visual effects that ultimately hold the middle entry in the Doctor Who 60th anniversary trilogy back – it’s a lack of innovation. We were supposed to get something new. Instead, we got a Doctor Who reskin of John Carpenter’s 1982 classic, The Thing. Heck, with its alien imposter-induced suspense, “Wild Blue Yonder” feels like Davies and Kingsley running back another Tennant/Tate Doctor Who outing, 2008’s “Midnight.”

That’s a real shame, not least of all after the previous Doctor Who special, “The Star Beast,” set the stage for Davies and co. to really cut loose.

Doctor Who: Wild Blue Yonder review score: 3/5

For that, it seems we’ll have to wait for the third and final Doctor Who 60th anniversary special, “The Giggle.” Certainly, that’s what the cliffhanger ending of “Wild Blue Yonder” wants us to believe. Yet if this second, overly familiar special has taught us anything, it’s that Doctor Who sometimes promises more than it can deliver.'

#Doctor Who #60th Anniversary #The Star Beast #Wild Blue Yonder #The Giggle #Russell T. Davies #David Tennant #The Thing #Catherine Tate #Donna Noble #Midnight #Tom Kingsley

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hannibutts · 1 year

Text

HANNIBAL SPOILERS S02E13

Ooh nice intro of Jack and Hannibal basically telling Will the same thing and Will agreeing with both of them.

BLINDING INTRO

Garrett Jacob Hobbes? Oh because of the killing of the deer thing - so like Will killing of the serial killer side of himself? Or is it because it was GJH who opened that door for Will in the first place, not only because he was Wills first kill, but because he got too close to how GJH thought… and then semi adopted his daughter?

Oh man if I was Bella I would have not let Hannibal in my house after he didn’t let me die. She gets some Barbs in but yikes.

If someone had not let me die - I would not let them into my house OR ask them to save my husband after I’m gone. I’d kick them in the dick, looking at you, Hannibal.

Freddie Lounds (booo)

Will just wants to keep Abigail out of Freddie’s filthy mouth.

Oh shit Hannibal can smell Freddie on Will. RUN BITCH

Oh yeah where has Alana (boo) been this whole time? Doesn’t Hannibal notice she’s not around. Cool visuals on the poisoned by darkness stuff. Wait, is she crying blood or is that just for visual effect?

Aw Hannibal sweetheart, he’s begging Will to run away with him. He knows something dodgy is happening with the whole Freddie Lounds thing so he’s trying to avoid whatever he thinks Will is planning about jack. That or it’s a trap, who fucking knows with these guys.

Oh shit, I was wondering when all of this was gonna bite jack in the ass. But he’s still going to go no? Especially since we’ve seen him and Hannibal go at it.

Oh NOW Alana sticks up for Will 🙄

Man BureauCynthia is missing the big picture here but living up to her name.

Welp at least Alana had the decency to warn Will the FBI was out to arrest him and Jack.

OH SHITTTTT - Will called Hannibal like how Hannibal called Garrett Jacob Hobbes! Did Will know about that or was it just coincidence? Literal chills

Ooh baby we’re back to the brawl. Let’s do this shit.

Jesus. Hannibal fighting in a tight white button down 👀

Alana placing herself in the middle. She gon get herself killed.

Dannng Laurence Fishburne in boxer stance 👀 am I too horny for this show because I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to be side eyeing so much during this fight…

Oh haha this is the daintily throwing himself at the door thing 😂 even when he’s supposed to be brutal, Mads moves so elegantly, it was such a perfect casting.

“In your defence, I worked very hard to blind you” I bet you did Hannibal 👀 at least he’s trying to spare Alana from feeling like she was an idiot…

Oh Jesus but he took her bullets… that’s fucking horrifying her just clicking desperately.

ABIGAIL??! OH MY FUCKING GOD ABIGAIL JUST PUSHED ALANA OUT THE WINDOW WHAT THE FUCK

Ok look, I dislike Alana but she didn’t deserve that but also she probs should have mentioned to Will that Abigail is alive and feeling Pushy… but you can forgive Alana considering she’s probably fucked or at least paralysed by the looks of it.

Dang Jack is losing a lot of blood.

Is Abigail a Trojan horse again with Will?

W to H “You were supposed to leave”

Oh shit, Will still has some allegiance to Hannibal, he wanted Hannibal to escape no matter what but Hannibal is too fucking obsessed with Will and now Jack and Alana are probably dead.

Aw Hannibal holding Will’s face so sweetly-OH MY FUCKING GOD HANNIBAL JUST FUCKING GUTTED WILL WHAT THE FUCK MAN WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS???

H- “Did you believe you could change me the way I change you?”

W- “I already did”

Fuck me this show.

MY POOR BLACK HEART CANT TAKE THIS - HANNIBAL JUST FUCKING RIPPED ABIGAIL THROAT OPEN INFRONT OF WILL WHILE WILL BEGGED HIM NOT TO. I am speechless.

Oh my god I am in tears, Will is holding in his guts with one hand and holding in Abigail’s throat with the other 😭😭😭

If Will would have gone with Hannibal, Hannibal would have present A I hail as a gift to Will and they would have gone away together with their daughter 😭😭😭😭

Gratuitous shot of Hannibal standing the rain while his Adam apple bobs, even I’m not horny for this after all of that (narrator: this was in fact a lie).

Hannibal just casually walking away in the rain looking all hot and stuff and not even glancing down at Alana.

Will’s killer instinct deer dying can only be a good thing no?

CREDITS? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN CREDITS????

EDIT - THERE WAS A FUCKING AFTER CREDIT SCENE OF HANNIBAL ON A FRENCH PLANE WITH BEDELIA THQT I HADNT SEEN

#hannibal #hannibal first time watch

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oswinsdolma · 3 years

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Writing someone with a perspective issues (this turned into a post about squinting disorders as well because that's a wider picture):

I saw a post about writing from the experiences of people who live with an illness/disability and it made me realise that I've never read or seen anything where a character has perspective issues, so I'm writing this in case anyone ever does.

Also, I know it's not a particularly severe thing, to live with, especially when compared to other visual impairments and/or disabilities, but it does exist!!

(by perspective issues, I mean being unable or finding it difficult to see in three dimensions. This leads to problems identifying the distance things are away, how big they are etc. I can't explain the difference between this and regular vision because I don't have anything to compare by)

I'll actually get started now:

Having to ask someone for a measurement of how far a drop is when preparing to jump from/slide off a ledge because you genuinely can't tell.

Having an image of how something looks based on a distance perspective and being baffled when you get closer and it's all the wrong way round.

It seems obvious, but not being able to see 3D movies. Especially with the one-blue-one-red glasses: because only one eye is functioning, you either see red or blue.

(if both eyes still have some vision) closing your strong eye and trying to use your weak eye but finding it really difficult because your eye just isn't used to supporting the vision. It takes a surprising amount of effort.

Making a conscious effort to sit either in the middle of a classroom or to the side where your good eye is closest to the board to avoid awkward head turning.

In cases of exophoria/exotrophia etc: Your bad eye wandering off at random times. This can be pointed out. You remember each one of these occasions vividly, even though it's been years.

Hand eye coordination is non-existant. I mean it, if you throw me something even from a close distance, I will not catch it. I one showed some paper under the whole stapler and wondered why it didn't work.

PE lessons were punishment from the devil. It doesn't take a genius to work out why.

On a related note, applying make up is a nightmare, especially eye liner and mascara. So is cutting hair.

The hatred of eye patches you had as a child.

Flash. Photography. (The sudden brightness makes one eye go off on one. None of your school photographs have both your eyes looking the same way).

You might have surgery to help this, especially as a really young child. Sometimes, this gets rid of the problem. Sometimes, it doesn't, or will just stop it from getting worse.

(It's a relatively short surgery, only a few hours under general anesthetic. It doesn't leave a scar. They give you eyedrops afterwards to clean the eye, then you go home at the end of the day.)

If you had it as a child (and maybe an adult), you will have been given a lot of exercises to try and get your bad eye to pull its weight. This is stuff like getting both your eyes to follow a pencil closer to your nose, or moving a picture across your vision that you have to keep both eyes looking at. They're very boring. If it's just a lazy eye or something temporary, this can be enough to fix it, but it's not guaranteed.

It's much more common to have these issues as a child than an adult, because a lot of cases are treated then.

There are a number of causes, and various degrees of severity and therefore permenence. I'm not an expert on the individual ways, but one cause us through being born with the muscles in one or both eyes not being big enough/being the wrong shape for your eye.

The only times you will see eyes looking outwards or being crosseyed in media is in poor caricatures of villains. You remember being excited when a dodgy hotel owner on scooby doo had eyes that turned outwards. You remember debating whether to ignore that she was a villain, just for a minute.

You will go to the opticians more frequently than most people. You may also have to go into hospital for regular checks. Personally, hospital visits stopped a short while after my surgery.

If you have lack of perspective because of a squint or weak eye(s), you will most likely need glasses. Sometimes, glasses can rectify this (I think). Other times, needing glasses is a side effect of whatever condition you may have.

Being wary when carrying sharp objects in case you don't see something/misjudged it.

Generally just being clumsy. Poor balance can sometimes be an issue, but this can improve over time.

I'm not old enough to drive but I invite you to consider why I'm worried about learning.

That's it for now because it's late and I can't think but yeah, this is a thing :)

#might fuck about and project this onto a character in my current wip #i already have a candidate in mind #you can ignore this post if you want. i just think it's weird that this is something that's barely acknowledged in media #disability awareness #i've never really thought of it as a disability because it's not very severe but i suppose it is in a way #writing #writing advice #btw i'm not mad that it's not really brought up and i'm probably being over-dramatic but yeah

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blackbat05 · 3 years

Text

I just watched Shang-Chi so here’s my review! It may be on the spoiler-y side so don’t read if you don’t want to get spoiled! If you want to talk about the movie feel free to slide in and chat! :)

BELOW:

1) Visuals

It was so breathtaking watching this masterpiece on the big screen. If you can, watch it in the cinema, I promise you won’t be disappointed.

2) Cast

Like so many of the MCU castings, Simu Liu as Shang-Chi is a bulls-eye. Being Asian and Chinese, my parents grew up watching Hong Kong films and although I respected what it bought to the table, I never really understood it. But seeing Tony Leung as Wenwu, it was such a balanced and nuanced character, considering he’s supposed to be the “villain” of the film. I would really love to say more but all I would say is that a villain doesn’t have to be outrageous to be fearful and Mr Tony Leung showed that perfectly. The father-son relationship was also beautifully crafted where there seemed to be some fear from Shang-Chi against his father but at the end there’s no trace of it. I’ll just say that with the experiences that I went through, I could really relate to that dynamic. Nevertheless, Wenwu’s method of upbringing was toxic, I will not deny that.

The girls also took the film to a different level in my opinion and I’m so grateful that Katy and Xialing are so different but so powerful in their own ways. In the beginning, Katy seems to be portrayed as someone who didn’t know what she wanted in life. But as we find out that she has a degree from a prestigious and respected university, it allows us to think there’s more that meets the eye. I can safely say, in the Asian context, I have seen so many close friends of mine doing what their doing now because their parents wanted them to and you can kind of predict the outcome. It’s still an existing problem in our society today and there will never be a quick solution to it. All I can say is that I’m grateful that my parents are supportive of whatever I’m doing.

On the other hand, Xialing grew up in an environment where girls weren’t allowed to do things that boys do but she didn’t let that define her. I for one have heard too many times in the classroom or just during my daily life: “can I have a few strong guys to carry so and so”. You have no idea how annoyed I was. I still hear that until today. To give you reference, I’ve been playing tennis competitively for 10 years, I grew up in an athletic family where I was trained by my father and my mother did athletics when she was younger. Anyways, like thank god my father isn’t Wenwu or remotely anything like him. He told me this one phrase and it describes Xialing perfectly. ‘STRONG IS BEAUTIFUL.’ Thank you Xu Xialing for being a role model for young Chinese girls. It’s been a long time coming.

Also, note to all directors. This is how you do a platonic friendship. God if the two friends continue into the MCU please please remember Director Daniel’s vision!

3) Action sequences

The fight scenes were so smooth, fluid and graceful. I’m not kidding you when I meant I could see every hit, every punch, every kick. Maybe skeptics would say that some were in slo-mo so I’ll leave it there but I’ve never felt so mesmerized and so calm by watching a fight scene. I would say that it is up there with Cap TWS as they are both equally action packed but in their own way.

4) Impactful part

Ying Nan with Shang-Chi! Where she simply just grabbed his hand and basically told him to relax as that’s the key to doing better. I think that spoke so much to me as I always had a problem relaxing when I was still active as a tennis player. I wish I realized sooner so that I didn’t have to go through so much confusion and emotional turmoil. Even now, I still find myself reminding that whatever I do, I have to be relaxed to give my best performance. So I’m glad this film reminded me again.

5) A bit dodgy

Haha ok well my friend pointed this out to me but I guess it’s film right so it’s all for the plot. But wow Katy really following her friend to stop his dad from potentially releasing soul sucking monsters into the world and then picking up some Katniss-level archery skills within a day(?) and practically saving Shang-Chi and Xialing (help I had serious Natasha-Vormir flashbacks during the film and this point)? But I guess I’ll close a blind eye to it hehe.

Overall stars: 4.5/5 ⭐️

If you’ve read till the end, I thank you sincerely with all my heart because this was hella long to type but I enjoyed doing so! Shang-Chi, you were such a pleasant ride and I hope to see more Asian (and POC) superheroes in the future of Marvel!

#shang chi #xialing #Katy #simu liu #zhangmenger #awkwafina #tony leung #representation #marvel #mcu phase 4 #I’m Chinese and I’m fucking proud of it #excuse my language

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danikindofwrites · 2 years

Text

Wednesday, March 9th.

After a night of some dodgy rest after hopping planes all day yesterday, it is time for the first March update for The Rising Night as promised!

I was going to originally post this yesterday in between my flights, but as I should have expected there were some things that came up with getting to and from planes that cut into that time so I decided to do it today instead. Some of the things I was planning on talking about have been touched on briefly in the late February update I posted, but going into this one it should have a little bit more information as well as a few big changes.

Writing My idea for this month is mostly on planning. I spent a good amount of the end of February and the beginning of March on mapping out the character creation portions as new things have been added and old things changed to better reflect the story (which will be discussed in the next section in full). I lot of this month in particular is going to stay in that direction towards mapping paths and options clearly for myself so that when I return home I can code them out properly, I’m a very visual person so I like being able to see how the paths connect to each other to better understand the branching and different options for MC so I don’t get myself lost or repeat things unnecessarily. With that being said, there are some minors things being rewritten in the Prologue itself, mainly to just fix wording and grammar and adding additional information to make it clearer, but other than that the Prologue is generally ready to go straight to demo since it has no choices set into it and purely writing until it hits the character creation portion right after. While touching up on the prologue, a lot of my mapping of course is Chapter One. It’s in a rough state right now, but it’s a major focus this month, a lot of it is going to be environmental and world building and really spend some time on understanding the mental state of MC and the few other characters introduced in Chapter One Before heading into the nitty gritty of Chapter Two. Asks/reactions (nsfw included) are open and welcome through the entirety of March to make up for having to wait on other things, so don’t be afraid to send anything in even if it is to just say hello :)

Character Creation There was originally only a few select things that were going to be incorporated for MC to give a sizable amount of customization without it seeming like I was going overboard for coding or accidentally making MC my own character instead of your character, but I realized a lot of it turned out to be very vague and too impersonal for such an important role and wanted to change it even if it meant putting in more work time, it is well worth it. Thanks to the input you guys have given me since posting TRN’s promo and some planning out on my part there is now going to be more options for MC such as where MC grew up based on MC’s race, who they grew up with (family, taken in by family friend, orphaned/street kid), and while I was originally going to implement some of the following options already I now have more variation for choosing an MC that is deaf/hard of hearing, mute/nonverbal, and options for prosthetics for MC , and with being able to choose your MC’s race (Vae, Tithess and Aidem options) there are now wider options for hair, eyes and skin based on MC’s race which all will also uniquely impact character interactions and scenes.

Illustrations This is March’s main focus blog wise. I’ll be answering any questions/reactions that come up, but other then mapping writing being away from home allows me to get out more things like sketches and character art to really bring The Rising Night to life and hopefully show some of the aesthetic I hope to achieve. I was able to finish up a few light scenes while traveling yesterday and will start to be posted tonight and as I said in the February update there will also be two Official Character Art pieces being finished this month, as of right now it is looking like it will be Enoc’s and M!Rowul’s that will be finished but that is subject to change as of right now. There will sketches of the other characters coming out as well scattered through the month, but a lot of them will be more concept art to get a feel for their official pieces.

Master List I realized I have a lot of information specifically about the world of The Rising Night that I have yet to answer and not just keep in my head, but a few of the pieces that I have managed to answer such as locations, information about people and politics, are kind of just floating out there randomly right now. So I will be posting more about some of the base world of Eddathil and compiling it together in a masterlist for easier access to more specific things so people don’t have to go searching through my posts going forward to find either niche information or answers to their questions that have already been given. This might take a while as I will be trying to spread some of the information out and not bombard people’s pages all at once, but I can start compiling what I already have and getting it all together, in the meantime don’t be afraid to ask or request information about things or even just let me know what questions you’d like to see answered for the master list so I know what areas to focus on getting information out about! Along those lines, the first thing I think I’ll be getting out to clarify some information and to help refer back to things will be a World Map that is at the moment unfinished and missing a few locations, but will clear up some larger locations that have been mentioned in past posts.

I think that’s about it for this update, as I’ve stated before my trip is going to last until the 22nd, but that really only hinders my coding right now and not the actual writing or planning of things so there is still lots to look forward to this month!

TLDR; Character creation mapped out, rough mapping of CH 1, asks/reactions open, LOTS of character creation additions, a map of the world, art posts coming this month and a big ol‘ masterlist for better navigation!

#dev log #I’m still pretty tired from the airport #but there should be a start to some art posts out tonight #thanks to everyone who has shown support for TRN!#The rising night if #monthly update #Interactive fiction #twine game

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angelanimedesaray · 3 years

Text

Wings in the Dark Chapter 8: Bleed

AN: Okay, um...all I’m going to put for this chapter is, ah...this little quote from AOT’s Wiki about Levi:

“When dealing with individuals he perceives to be enemies to mankind, Levi is capable of behaving sadistically, even vindictively. “

Characters: Levi, Fem!Vamipre!Reader, Eld (Briefly/Mentioned), Erwin (Mentioned)

Pairing: (Eventual) Levi x Fem!Vampire!Reader

Warnings: Blood, Violence, Injury, Self Inflicted Injury, Misunderstandings, Near Death, Forced Blood Drinking, I think Mild Torture counts for this...Language

Word Count: 7842

<----Previous Chapter Masterlist Next Chapter---->

*Levi’s POV*

Levi waited a few days before he did anything.

He would have waited longer, but he knew if he waited a week or more, she would have the chance to kill again, and he wanted to act before she could. The other night it had been someone who had jumped her that she’d attacked, but who would it be next time? Some random civilian off the street? Considering the conditions in the Underground, the man she killed could have been someone just trying to survive--Levi himself had been a thug in the Underground.

Of course, given the area they’d been in, it was less likely that man had been just trying to get by, but there were too many unknowns about her, too much sinister implications in the stark facts alone, for him to go off blind, naïve faith that she was some kind of vigilante type that only preyed on the truly terrible.

Though honestly, even that thought sickened him. If she was just another person, which was the theory he would act on considering how insane the other one was, then that meant she was going out of her way to kill people in the Underground, and that kind of self-righteous dealing out of judgement and death was sickening to him.

Of course, he was still keeping the insane theory in mind. He had no solid evidence he’d seen with his own eyes to prove it, just a bunch of theories and circumstances that fit so snug and perfectly into the larger picture he couldn’t ignore it. But he wasn’t going to treat her as some supernatural creature of darkness until he saw something that proved it without a doubt.

All the more reason for this plan for a confrontation he’d managed to cook up in a short amount of time.

Firstly, he hadn’t told Erwin yet. Not because he’d suddenly decided not to have the other man involved--no, Erwin needed to know what was going on, no matter how this panned out. Why he withheld the developments he’d made in the Underground was because he was still uncertain about the more insane theory. There was too much for him to omit it, but he didn’t exactly want to go up to Erwin and tell him that he thought L/N was a demon who drank blood from humans she killed every week.

Erwin would probably have him committed if he told the man he was considering it with no actual, solid proof. So, Levi had left behind a letter addressed to Erwin explaining what he’d discovered in the Underground and his two theories, complete with the tale from the Underworld and why he was crazy enough to even consider it, and how at the very least she was a serial killer so either way she was a threat. That way, if something went wrong during this confrontation and he didn’t make it out of there alive, the secret wouldn’t die with him, and Erwin would still be warned.

That was his main concern.

The second had been how to approach this. How to get the upper hand on her when she was already so...refined in her senses. How she always seemed to know when he was nearby or when he was heading her way. How was he supposed to get the drop on someone like that?

That was where Eld came into play.

He did his best to make it look unimportant and nothing more than part of the usual daily routine. The command was given in passing as Eld came from the opposite end of the hallway, Levi stopping him briefly to ask him to tell L/N to make a delivery for Levi to a specific address, with instructions that included a fake package waiting just outside Levi’s office for L/N to pick up and deliver.

The address, unbeknownst to Eld and certainly to L/N who had just recently come to the surface compared to Levi, was to an abandoned warehouse a little ways outside of one of Rose’s main towns.

After giving the order to Eld, Levi kept walking with a purpose like it had simply been a passing thing instead of the first domino to fall in his plan for cornering L/N--or at least getting the drop on her to give himself a bit of an upper hand in this mess.

Now he just had to get to his observation point before she had the chance to make the delivery, and wait.

No more games. It was time he started getting real answers from the source itself.

Levi left his jacket behind, making sure he had full mobility, ODM gear primed and ready as he crouched low on the rooftop of another tall building a few houses over from the warehouse. He waited in silence, sharp gaze on the roads as he waited for L/N to appear with the fake delivery.

He tried not to think too much about the situation any more than he already had. He was already so wrapped up in conspiracy theories as it was he didn't want to get any further in his head, especially since he needed to be focused on the confrontation at hand.

Leaning against the chimney of the home he was waiting on top of, Levi attached one of the ODM gear blades, just in case he needed it as soon as his feet hit the ground. When he needed to move, the only sound he wanted to make was the ODM gear, and hopefully he could push it fast enough L/N wouldn't be able to bolt.

Speaking of…

She finally appeared, making her way down the street towards the warehouse with the fake parcel in hand. She slowed down when she saw the state of the building, hesitation appearing in her movements, head suddenly on a swivel. She was good at sensing the danger in a situation, which under normal circumstances would be a good thing, but currently it made Levi’s job a little harder.

Levi shifted just enough so he was ready to move immediately, watching L/N as she cautiously made her way into the warehouse. Heart pounding, Levi waited a few seconds, giving her the chance to walk deeper into the warehouse, to put down to parcel where he’d described…

The cables of his gear fired, and he kicked off the roof, a burst of gas propelling him forward, feet extended out and arms crossed in front of his face to protect himself as he crashed through one of the warehouse windows. Below him, she whipped around at the sound of the glass crashing, body coiling like she was going to run, retaliate, or simply dodge. After seeing it was Levi crashing through the window, she hesitated for the briefest moment. It was all he needed for him to move just slightly, to adjust now that he had a visual of her, so that he could land atop her.

His knee was planted into her chest, foot planting on the ground beside her solidly, one hand slapping against the ground beside her head while his other put his blade at her throat. With her pinned solidly beneath him, Levi's eyes flashed, glass crunching beneath his boot from the shattered window as he made sure he was in a solid position that would not be easy for her to break free of.

"What are you?" Levi ground out, steely gaze fixated on her eyes, reading every twitch in her face to make sure he caught if she tried to lie to him.

It was the first thing he asked, because he knew she was a serial killer, at least, but if she was more, if those monsters from the story were real and she was one of them…

She hesitated. It wasn't confusion that flashed across her face at his question, and she didn't immediately spout some bullshit lie about being innocent of anything that would justify his ambush.

The fact that she didn't immediately ask him what he was talking about gave him a bad feeling, a sense of his monster theory slowly solidifying.

He still wasn't ready to believe it entirely, but it was continuing to gain traction.

"You're going to have to be more specific," she said in a level voice. Beneath him, she kept perfectly still, attempting to look non-threatening. it didn't work when Levi knew she'd killed a man just a few days ago by ripping out his throat.

Levi’s grip tightened, the blade held straight against her throat as his eyes flashed dangerously. "I'm done playing games with you. I know you've been sneaking around the Underground killing people for years, longer, perhaps." Even though he wasn't entirely certain, he decided to take a leaf out of Erwin’s book and gamble to see if he could coax a confirming reaction, growling the words out in anger. "You're not even human, are you?"

Alarm flashed in her eyes, and her posture shifted to a more on-guard position, body tense beneath him as her words came out careful and measured, full of wariness. "What do you--"

"Enough with the games!"

He was pissed now, fed up with the round and round with her constantly slipping through his grasp. Her attempt to continue to be dodgy right now only inflamed his temper, causing his free hand to grab her collar and lift her up before slamming her against the ground again. Glass cracked and crunched beneath her from the impact, likely causing the glass to tear up her back in the process.

She didn’t react in pain, though. Her eyes hardened and she grabbed at the hand that was clutching her collar, attempting to pry his fingers away as she ignored what he was saying in favor of trying to get his hand off her neck. She wasn’t even going after the blade, which would have made far more sense in his mind, but both her hands were going for the one at her collar.

She was protecting something there.

“She’s always wearing the same necklace, all the time–I’ve never seen her without it.”

That had to be what she was protecting, what she was so focused on right now. Realizing it might be something he could use as leverage, his hand delved a little further until he felt a chain and medallion, fingers curling around it before he ripped it off her on an instinct, holding his hand far out of her reach while the other hand kept that blade on her neck.

Since Levi had come through the window and pinned her to the ground instantly, they were sitting in the sunlight. The shadows of the warehouse were a few feet away from her, and Levi’s body was partially blocking out the sun.

As soon as the necklace came off of her, as Levi pulled his hand back to hold it out of reach, the parts of her that were exposed to the sun and not hidden in shade or shadow began to steam and burn. In a sudden show of strength that revealed just how much she had been holding back, she let out a scream of pain and darted off into the shadows, momentarily abandoning the attempt to protect or reclaim the necklace in favor of getting out of the sun and curling up in the shadows a few feet away.

Levi sat frozen in place, staring in shock at the woman whose skin had turned red and blistered, the steam already starting to lessen and the skin that had been burned starting to heal itself as he watched.

What...the fuck...

That...had not been normal. Nothing about this situation, about the woman in front of him, was normal. No more doubts, then. The insane was the reality of what he’d discovered. She really was the creature from the Underground tales. A creature of shadows that fed off the blood of humans.

"It's real, then," he said in a monotone voice, getting to his feet as she continued to lurk in the shadows, the pain from her burns lessening enough she was unfurling from the defensive, pained position of a few moments ago and was slowly getting to her feet as well.

The tension in the air, the dynamic between them, shifted entirely with this new development. There was open hostility in Levi’s gaze as he tucked the necklace safely away. As long as he had it, he had an advantage over her--he didn't understand the specifics, but it seemed the necklace he had protected her somehow from the sun. As long as he had it instead of her, she was trapped and restricted to the shadows of this warehouse. He would have an environmental advantage. Though she would also probably be desperate to get it back. He would have to be careful of that--desperation made people unpredictable and dangerous, and she was already both of those on a normal day. At least she was to him.

Now that the impossible had been confirmed, many of the theories Levi had been keeping at bay in case it really was impossible now came flooding in, hardening his resolve and deepening the hostility the longer he thought about it. She might not have done anything to harm the Scouts yet, but that didn’t mean she was innocent. She hadn’t been around Erwin yet, had she? What if Erwin was her target? Now that everything was rapidly falling into place, the enormity of the implications that came with her being an immortal creature was falling over him as well. At the rate she’d been feeding on people in the Underground recently, she must have killed hundreds of people across her lifetime--more, maybe.

And that locked door double homicide--the way Victoria had died, how it had only been Victoria and Y/N Frazier in the room, how there had been no sounds to alert the parents, how strongly the police had suspected it had been someone the girls knew. Now that he knew what L/N was, it made sense for Victoria’s murderer to have been L/N herself. The woman in front of him hadn’t been above killing her best friend back then, so even if that man she’d killed last night had been scum of the earth, anyone was fair game to her. Who knew who else she had hurt or killed during her lifetime? She was just as much of a threat as the Titans, except her, he didn’t know her intentions. Titans were mindless beasts that ate humans just because. She had intelligence, she mingled with them, she picked them out, stalked, and preyed upon them, and her intentions with the Scouts were entirely unknown to him.

Which made her much more dangerous, in his mind.

He would deal with his reaction to finding out these monsters of the shadows were real later. Right now, he had to deal with the situation at hand and the creature that was staring him down from the shadows now. Reflection could come later, if he survived this, considering how in the dark he was about what they were capable of and what they could do. Or how to kill them, now that he thought about it considering he’d just watched those burns across her skin rapidly heal.

Decapitation seemed like a safe first attempt, if it came to that. He needed answers, first, though. He might actually be able to get some answers now that the façade had been dropped. There was no point in her trying to hide it now that he knew for a fact that she wasn't human.

"Why join the Scouts? What did you hope to gain--what were you trying to do? Were we just your convenient cover or does it go deeper than that?"

*Reader’s POV*

Wariness had quickly turned to alarm as you had approached the warehouse and as Levi jumped you. You’d heard his approach, but seeing it was Levi crashing through the window had caused your hesitation--the last thing you wanted was to do something that suggested you were threatening him.

Alarm, however, had given way to panic one Levi pulled the necklace from your neck. That necklace was your freedom. Your life. And he had quite literally just taken it from you and was now actively keeping it from you. Without that necklace, you couldn’t walk in the sun, couldn’t be in the Scouts, couldn’t stay on the surface--you would have to crawl back down into the Underground for the rest of your life because as far as you knew, that necklace was the only one of its kind. You’d acquired it by a nigh miracle, off the body of another vampire. Finding another would be no small feat--practically impossible.

All other thought went out the window, except for the singular consuming thought to get the necklace back. Now. Levi’s questions were secondary in the wake of the need to get your necklace back.

“Give it back,” you said in a harsh tone, gaze boring into Levi as any calm or timid demeanor gave way to a hidden ferocity from your nature.

“No,” Levi replied simply, taking a step back deeper into the sunlight. “You’ll answer my questions first.”

In an attempt to take it back by force, you rushed at him, not sure which pocket it was in, but knowing if you moved fast enough you could at least knock him out of the light and have a better chance at finding it in the shadow. Levi side-stepped after seeing you coil for an attack, moving out of the way just in time. You crashed into the shadow with a gasp, skin blistering again from the brief exposure to the sun. You would just have to tolerate the brief pain--it was nothing compared to getting that necklace back.

After taking a moment to let the burn ease, you shifted and rushed at him again, this time successfully knocking him into the shadows before he staggered backwards into the light of another window, blade in front of him in an attempt to ward you off and warn you he /would/ cut you if he felt he needed to.

“Give it back, now,” you reiterated in a growl, and Levi’s gaze hardened again, angling the blade in front of him so the sunlight glinted at you, causing you to have to duck out of the way with a hiss.

“While I have it, you can’t be in the sun--you can’t leave this warehouse. Correct? I’ll keep it until I have my answers,” Levi answered, continuing to reflect the sunlight off his blade to force you to move.

Not in the mood to be toyed with--and the irony currently escaping you considering Levi had alluded to the fact he’d felt like you’d been toying with him all this time--you rushed him again. This time, he grabbed at you when you connected with him, both of you falling to the floor and rolling across the ground, your hands grappling at his waist to try and find the necklace. Since your hands were currently occupied, it was easy for him to grab you and roll you over, attempting to pin you to the floor face first with part of your body in the sun.

“Answers, now!” Levi shouted over your cry of pain, body weight pressing down on you to try and keep you down and in the sun. “Why join the Scouts? What do you get out of it?” Levi demanded to know.

Considering how much he wanted answers, you doubted he’d be doing this if he knew that being in the sun too long would kill you. He just knew it hurt you, which was probably why he was trying to use it to make you talk.

With an angry and pained snarl, you briefly went still before rearing back to throw him off, turning in the same movement to push him off of you and break free.

This was quickly turning into a full on fight. So much for not antagonizing him.

As Levi got back to his feet, the edge of the blade was angled more fully towards you. It seemed he could tell this was becoming a full on fight as well, and was about to step it up.

You weren’t armed, not in the sense of weapons that weren’t body parts. Your fangs weren’t an option--both because you refused to bite him, and even if you wanted to, you couldn’t, thanks to what you’d been putting in his tea…

Which meant while he had his own natural abilities and his blade, you just had your strength and speed, plus you were holding back because the last thing you wanted was to kill him, which made this all the more complicated.

Once again, you rushed him, and like last time, he met your attack instead of stepping away, trying to throw you aside into the sun. You dug your heels in to prevent it, feeling Levi’s fist connect with your gut and causing you to stagger slightly, fingers clenching in the fabric of his shirt as you threw him aside. He didn’t go far, planting his feet after a few staggered steps before his foot cut through the air, colliding with your jaw. You reeled back, hand on your bloodied lip before you felt his hands on you again, taking advantage of your momentary daze as he swept one of your feet out from underneath you, pushing you backwards and to the ground again. His blade was at your throat once more, except this time it was biting, just shy of drawing blood as he held you firmly down with all his strength, all patience and tolerance gone from his eyes.

“Answer me, or I’ll just kill you and be done with it,” he threatened, the chill in his eyes and the blade breaking skin and drawing blood from your throat for emphasis and to show how serious he was. For him, it was your last chance to talk. And for extra incentive, he was attempting to keep your arm pinned and burning in the sun.

Your instinct for self-preservation triggered at the very direct and real threat against your life, you threw him off of you with all of your strength, tossing him aside and hearing him go through a wall before landing with an ominous sound out of view.

You heard a choked sound...silence fell over the room...and you could smell the blood in the air.

No...

The scent of blood was getting rapidly stronger and overpowering.

No, no, no…

You’d only been trying to get him off you, wanting the threat to your life removed before you were going to pin him and make him listen while you took back your necklace.

You hadn’t meant to hurt him--not as seriously as the scent of blood in the air suggested. And now you were afraid of what you were going to find as you got up from the floor with your heart in your throat and arm cradled to your chest, waiting for it to heal as you rushed forward to see what state he was in and assess the situation.

*Levi’s POV*

The first impact as he was sent flying through the wall had been enough to stun him and knock the wind out of him, trying to brace himself for the next impact when he felt the wall give beneath him, choking on the dust he inhaled before he felt the second impact on a second wall that had been perpendicular to the first and already partially broken and decrepit. It gave way partially but not entirely, wood and other building materials cracking and giving way beneath him, Levi’s full weight smashing against the broken materials. Oddly enough, he didn’t fall to the ground. His head cracked against stone, pain shooting against his head and momentarily disoriented and unable to grasp his surroundings as something held him in place.

He choked again, partially on the dust from the broken walls, but also from pain--not just from his head, but from something that made it hard to breathe, that had him starting to go into shock. As his vision slowly came back, sunlight falling across his body in beams from a boarded up window, he looked down to see some of the wooden internal, structural boards of the broken second wall sticking through his stomach.

He’d been impaled. Plus the back of his head felt damp, telling him he’d cracked his head hard on the stone behind him as well as been impaled somewhere fatal. Impaled in a place that would give him a slow death, too. Of all the ways to die, it was going to be impaled on a random piece of wood in a broken down building. Not fighting Titans or anything like that. All that time fighting Titans, putting himself out there and putting his life on the line time and time again, all those people dying around him in fights with man eating giants, and this was how he was going to go out?

What a joke.

Well...perhaps there was something fitting in his death in the fact it had been in the middle of a struggle with another man-eating creature. Either way, he was still going to die. She would either watch him die or leave him to die, because it was the best situation for her--he would be silenced, her secret would remain. Well, as far as she knew. She didn’t know there would be a letter for Erwin to find in his office revealing her secret to the Scout’s Commander. He had some comfort in that thought, at least.

He’d known this was a possibility going into this situation with so many unknowns, but he’d still hoped that maybe he could make it through this alive. Apparently his luck had finally run out.

As Levi came to terms with his rapidly approaching death, L/N suddenly climbed through the hole in the first wall, her burnt arm cradled to her chest even as it rapidly healed, eyes wide at the sight of Levi impaled in front of her. Her hands shook slightly as she approached him, her unburned hand reaching out instinctively for him before it was burned by the sunlight, as if reminding her that she didn’t have her necklace and couldn’t withstand the sunlight.

She let out a small hiss, stepping as close as she could with the sunlight as her hands started searching him again, patting him down in a rush, obviously looking for the necklace he’d stashed away.

“FUCK!” she shouted halfway through, making Levi flinch slightly at the outburst, her hands repeatedly being burned and forcing her to pull away before she would reach out again, uncaring if she would get burned, simply desperate to find that damn necklace.

In his mind, it showed how little she cared for his life, how inconsequential it was to her in the grand scheme of things. How she could ignore the dying man in front of her so completely in her search for that damn necklace.

He wouldn’t get any answers from her before he died, would he?

Her hand finally found the place he’d tucked her necklace away, a modicum of relief flashing in her eyes as her fingers curled around the fine chain and she pulled back, stepping away from the sunlight as she quickly put it back on. Her head lifted, eyes meeting his, and Levi felt a sudden surge of panic as he realized there was a red glow in her eyes, a red glow that was getting stronger as she stepped closer to him.

His mind was filled with that tale Kenny had told him, how the glowing red eyes was the last thing a man saw before having his throat ripped out and being devoured by the monster of shadows. On a self-preservation instinct, Levi’s limp grip tightened on the blade still on his hand through pure survival instinct drilled into him after years in the field. As she came closer, he attacked with the blade, slashing at her to try and keep her back before she could tear into him. He was dying, but at least let him have some control over how he died--he would rather die from something stupid like being impaled like this than ripped into by her while he lay helpless and unable to do anything. He might be dying, but he would fight until his fingers couldn’t grip the blade anymore to keep her at bay if it meant dying with a scrap of dignity.

*Reader’s POV*

When you saw Levi, the panic was palpable in your blood, causing your pulse to quicken and your hands to shake as you went up to him. Where he was pinned down, he was in the sunlight, which meant you couldn’t help him like you needed to until you had your necklace back. You hated prioritizing it over his life, even for a few moments, but you needed the necklace back so you wouldn’t be restricted by sunlight while you tried to help him.

Every moment you’d been unable to find it had been torture. Yes, because you kept burning yourself in the sunlight as you tried to find it on his person, but also because you could practically feel his time running out with every second that passed with you unable to find the necklace.

And then there was the big issue. The temptation. You had always been afraid of what would happen if Levi’s blood was ever spilled around you. Just being around him and what you knew about him was enough to tell you his blood would be exceptional, one of the best sources of blood within the walls you were going to find. Freshly spilled blood was always tough to resist, but when it was exceptional blood like his, and when this much of it was being spilled so close to you, the red blossoming rapidly across his white shirt…

You had to fight yourself every moment you were standing in front of him, that intoxicating scent trying to overwhelm all of your senses, dizzying in its intoxicating nature, drawing you in at a time when you couldn’t afford to take a step back. You knew your eyes were glowing red as your vampiric nature tried to take full control, your teeth aching painfully in your mouth, fangs wanting to protrude forth and begging you to sink your teeth into his warm skin.

But you couldn’t. You couldn’t.

He needed help, the kind of help only you could give him right now, and if you didn’t do it soon it was going to be too late.

Trying to overcome your instincts by sheer willpower started to feel impossible the longer you stood just in front of him, teeth grit painfully together especially with how much your jaw was aching right now. It helped to remind yourself in your head over and over like some kind of hypnotic mantra that he had white sage in his blood and it would be poisonous for you to even have a small sip--even if you did give in, it wouldn’t end well, not just for him but for you, too.

Finally finding the necklace had been a relief--no more wasting time, you could help him without restriction now. Plus it was a huge wave of relief to have the small item that provided you with freedom, though any relief you felt was quickly muffled by the situation you and Levi were now in. Able to finally stop focusing on that necklace once more, you looked up at him just to make sure he was still conscious, that he was still with you and wasn’t too pale, considering he hadn’t said a word the entire time you’d searched him. He might have still been in shock--

The sudden whistle of his blade slicing through the air and across your chest quickly dispelled any foolish notion you had about him being in shock. The rapid pounding of his heartbeat was enough to tell you the action had come from raw fear, and that fear was still rampant inside him even as he slowly bled out in front of you, his gaze still hard as steel despite his fear and the situation he was in.

The wound across your chest caused you to stagger back with a low groan, blood blossoming across your now ripped shirt even as the wound started to slowly stitch itself back together. The severity of the wound meant that the healing sapped at your strength, making you feel a hint of fatigue while also intensifying the thirst that was already so hard for you to control with so much top tier blood in such close proximity.

His breathing was ragged, but he still held that blade up to protect himself, showing he was ready to struggle against you until all strength left him. You couldn’t afford that right now--you needed cooperation if you were going to get him out of this. Or you at least needed him in a position he couldn’t fight back, though you weren’t about to wait until he lost his strength due to blood loss--it might be too late by then.

Using your speed to attempt to grab him before he could react, you snatched his hand that was holding that blade aloft with both of your hands, pausing for just a moment to meet his gaze.

“Sorry, but I can’t have you cutting me up right now and making this more difficult...it’ll heal anyway,” you said apologetically, seconds before you broke his hand without warning, a sound finally escaping him in the form of a sharp shout of pain that he quickly cut off, gritting his teeth even as the injury forced him to drop the blade and prevented him from drawing another--at least with that hand.

Now that you’d taken care of any attempts to try and attack her with the ODM gear blades, you lifted one of your arms up to your mouth, biting deeply into your own skin with a pained whimper. This wasn’t something you’d done before, especially not like this, but you knew it would work, so you muscled past the instinct not to hurt yourself and through the pain, making sure you drew enough blood it dribbled down your arm before you released it.

Levi was watching you in horrified silence, probably trying to figure out what the hell you were doing. It was clear he, ah...didn’t think very highly of you, but you were trying desperately not to take it personally and focus on your current task--making sure Humanity’s Strongest didn’t die from a stupid accident during a fight that had been born from a complete lack of understanding and communication.

“I know it’s gross, I know it’s weird, but you’ve got to drink it,” you told him as you moved closer, lifting your arm to his mouth. He gave you an incredulous look and a quick no before you had pressed your arm against his mouth, and he tried to push your arm away with his one good hand, body tensing as he started to struggle, causing his wound to bleed more, fresh blood staining his shirt around the wound. You hadn’t moved him off of what was impaling him yet because you knew it would only make him bleed out faster, but if he was going to keep struggling like this, he was only going to do more damage.

Attempting to get him to stop moving, you pressed your other arm against his upper chest, that injury still pressed hard against his mouth even as he clenched his teeth and tried to keep his lips pressed together, tried to turn his head away and resist.

“Stop fighting me--it’s just going to make things worse, and we’re already on borrowed time,” you pleaded with him. He didn’t listen, though. It was no use--he saw you as an enemy, he didn’t trust you, why would he believe what you were doing was to help him?

You’d pushed your arm past his lips and up against his teeth--the only reason he didn’t bite was probably because he knew that would only accelerate or help what she was trying to do. All he could do was try to resist, try not to swallow any. The wound on your arm was healing, the bleeding slowing down as blood slipped down his chin, his resistance making a mess even as he coughed, choked on his own blood that was starting to well up in his throat, and attempted to spit out what had made it into his mouth, speckles of blood dotting your skin and his lips.

You hated how cruel it was, but he wasn’t giving you much of a choice. Desperate to get your blood in his system so it could heal him, and a fair amount of it so he would heal quickly, you pulled your arm away, covered his mouth, bit into that same spot again hard enough tears pricked in your eyes, and then forced your arm against his mouth again, this time taking care to cover his airways and suffocate him until his reflex to swallow kicked in.

You held him down as best as you could as he struggled violently against you, unable to look him in the eye in the process and simply pressing your body weight against his to keep him pinned in place and try to minimize the damage his struggling would do to the already fatal wound, ears straining for the sound you were waiting for that would tell you he’d finally swallowed.

It was a relief when it finally happened, two big but reluctant gulps causing relief to wash through you as you instantly pulled back, Levi sucking in instinctually desperate gasps for air as you started undoing the brown wrap of your uniform that was around your waist, reaching over and pulling Levi’s free of his uniform as he sputtered and retched.

At the sound, you suddenly snapped to attention and reached up to grasp his chin, eyes flashing dangerously. “Don’t you dare try to spit it back up you stubborn, idiotic asshole!” you snapped, some of your frustrations leaking out despite your best efforts to try and stay calm in this situation. “I’m trying to save your life you goddamn idiot!”

Pulling the wrap on his uniform free as well, you quickly wadded both of them up, finally slipping one hand behind him against the middle of his back, the other resting on his chest, bracing yourself as if this was going to hurt you as much as it was going to hurt him. You reminded yourself to breathe through your mouth instead of your nose in the hopes that would help lessen the bloodthrist when the blood gushed out with what you were about to do.

Fuck, this is not how I wanted this to happen, if it was ever going to happen, you thought to yourself before--again, without warning Levi--you pulled him quickly off of the wood that had impaled him.

Levi’s cry of pain was far more audible this time, his legs buckling and causing you to have to support his weight as your hands shifted, pressing the wadded up wraps to the entrance and exit wounds of where he’d been impaled to try and staunch the bleeding and try to keep as much blood as you could in his body as long as possible. You didn’t know how long it would take your blood to start healing him, or if it would heal him in time, but you did know from personal experience that the healing wouldn’t work properly if he was still impaled.

You hoped for his sake the healing would outpace the rate he was dying, even with all the time you’d lost with all his stubborn struggling.

“Careful, careful, try not to move, you’ll only bleed out faster,” you warned him as you very carefully laid him down, letting the weight of his body press the wrap against his back against that wound while you pressed down with your strength to staunch the bleeding from his stomach, your now free hand making sure you laid him down as gently as possible, crackling his head until he was lying still on the ground.

You swallowed thickly at the increased scent of blood in the air, small groans trapped in your throat, eyes closed and nostrils flared as you tried desperately to resist the urge to drink from him. There was a dark voice in the back of your mind that whispered what a waste all this blood would be if he died, but you shoved it aside viciously, pressing perhaps a little tighter than necessary against the wrap you were holding to his stomach.

After a few moments of tense silence, you heard Levi’s voice rasp out a question, his broken hand lying limp against the floor and the other instinctively clutching at the wrap with you.

“Why? Why not leave me for dead, when I know what you are? Your secret would die with me--so why are you trying to help me?” he asked, voice hoarse and strained, his eyes burning with confusion, showing just how lost he was at how quickly this whole encounter kept shifting in direction and tone. And looking into his eyes, you felt a sudden wave of sympathy and pity for him.

He was just as lost and confused as you had been all those years ago, when this had first happened to you. You couldn’t hold any of this against him. He’d clearly thought you were a threat--understandably, since you technically were. Even now while you were trying to help him, you were fighting tooth and nail against your nature to rip into him instead.

He needed answers. He deserved answers. The truth, no more lies or deceit.

You were going to give him what you never had the luxury of receiving. An explanation.

“Humanity can’t afford to lose you,” you said, the words coming out far more gruff than you anticipated, how much you were struggling right now leaking out into your voice, your body rigid with the effort it took to resist the blood seeping out of him just below your hands--blood that was actually starting to stain your hands, you could see now. “And I don’t want you dead. I never have and I never will. You need to live, even if that means I have to run, because the Scouts need you.”

You cleared your throat, deciding to add a bit more logic that might sit more comfortably with him considering he’d gone into this seeing you as an enemy.

“Not to mention, I’m not an idiot. It won’t be hard to figure out I’m responsible if you die here, like this. There’s that, too,” you added in a fairly flippant voice that hinted at humor, like you were actually trying to lighten the mood. The attempt fell flat, though--you hadn’t expected it to stick, at least, it had been a knee jerk reaction.

His breathing was shallow, but he still attempted to speak again, trying to get the most important questions out first while he still had time.

“Why...did you join the Scouts?” he asked, voice low and quiet from a lack of energy, the sound alarming you because it made you realize just how much blood he’d lost, how weak he already was. Still, you answered him, hoping to keep him engaged and awake by answering his questions. You needed him awake, because that meant he was still with you, he still had a chance to make it out of here alive.

You cleared your throat, trying not to get emotional over the question that actually had quite a personal reason behind it. You’d only given him a partial truth that night he’d asked you in the mess hall after you’d returned from the Underground. Now, with him knowing you weren’t human and having something of an understanding of what you were, you could give him a more complete picture.

“I couldn’t take living the way I was down there. Killing to survive and nothing more, doing nothing with my life except surviving--if it could even be called that. And it was coming at such a high cost just to keep myself physically alive, a high cost in the lives of others, and I...I wanted to do something that made my life feel...worthwhile. I don’t think it could ever justify all those deaths, but at least I could do something to help a cause bigger than myself. I could put these abilities of mine to use for something other than killing people to survive.” You met his eyes, your panic rising to see the fogginess in his gaze, how unfocused he was, how much he was struggling simply to stay present and hear your answer. You spoke a little louder to make sure it got through to him, pouring your emotions and intent into your next words in the hopes he would hear you and believe the sincerity of what you said. “I really did join to help in whatever way I could. I wanted to give my life some meaning again, so that maybe I could feel like I had a reason for living, for being what I am.”

Levi’s breaths started to hitch and catch, eyes fluttering, head starting to loll to the side, consciousness clearly starting to leave him. In a panic, you reached out with your free hand to grab at his chin, trying to turn his head back to its upright position to look at you.

“Captain? Captain Levi? Levi, stay with me, I need you to stay awake.” His eyes focused on you for a moment, but only briefly. His eyes never regained that conscious clarity, remaining foggy and unfocused as his eyes started to flutter again.

“Captain!” you shouted harshly at him, smacking him across the face in hopes to spark something of a physical reaction. “Hey, stay with me--you can’t let yourself die, especially not right now,” you lectured him as his head briefly lolled towards you after you’d smacked him. He was already slipping again, though, and you continued to shout at him to try and keep him with you, desperation coloring your voice.

“Levi! You have to stay alive, especially now that you’ve got my blood in your system. Please, stay awake, just a little longer! I need you to stay with me until my blood heals enough of your wound, okay? Captain Levi, stay awake, stay--Levi!”

You could see him struggling, see him trying to stay awake and alert, trying to stay with you, but he went limp, his consciousness leaving him soon after, breath a bare rattle and his pulse alarmingly weak.

“Captain Levi!”

Next Chapter---->

Levi Tags: @humanitys-hottestsoldier @clary-quinn @sunny-flo @whalerus @thirstyforsometea

Wings in the Dark Tags: @regalillegal @animeluver23 @theshylittleelfgirl @queenthorin1 @dilucs-thighs @sociallyanxiousmouse @subtlepjiminie @hakunamatatayqueen @queenofcurse

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cybernaght · 3 years

Text

Guardian rewatch: Episode 5

I thought this would be a shorter recap. Ha!

Every now and then throughout this show we are getting CGI wide shots of the Dragon City, mostly establishing the time of day. They have three settings: nighttime, daytime, and sunset/sunrise. While quality-wise those wide shots would not feel out of place in a video game from ten years ago, with buildings looking all rubbery, I actually really like this sunset sky. I also appreciate that they firmly establish that this is city is not, in fact, a real place. I almost wish the architecture was a little bit less familiar, but making the city look truly otherworldly here would make location scouting much harder. As it happens, the buildings on the forefront have a very 60’s art deco revival inspired feeling, and there are some distinctively neoclassical buildings peppered around as well. We can also see that the roads are very wide, and generally there is a hint of Stalinist grandioseness about the downtown. Unfortunately, it looks nothing like the locations and sets the characters are running in; we also get a feeling that the Dragon City is very large, which is not entirely consistent with the very few locations that were available when shooting the series. This shot does, however, remind me the city I grew up in (Moscow).

The actual plot of the episode centres around Huang Linqi and his fiancé, Li Jiaqi, going missing - it will be important, because their disastrous wedding will produce the most Clark Kent moment that Shen Wei will ever have. We also meet the parents of the couple, who are stinking rich and extremely unpleasant. It also introduces us to Butler Wu (Wu Tian’en) and his son, who will become important in later episodes. Butler Wu is not actually the villain of the piece, despite this shot clearly telling us otherwise.

Back at the university, Shen Wei is having a morning tea with his dean. He holding his teacup with almost god-like elegance, very close to actually covering his mouth when he drinks, which is extremely old-fashioned. This is in stark contrast with him brazenly and un-gentlemanly showing his ankles.

Shen Wei is asked to move off campus, because, apparently, having a chief of the special task force showing up at your office is bad for the reputation. Since the professor does not look surprised, and states that he has already found a flat, I’m guessing that he was clever enough to have predicted this turn of events, and used it to secure the place a breath away from Zhao Yunlan. It is up to speculation as to when he started scouting for an apartment: it could not have been more than a few weeks since he met Zhao Yunlan, and finding a flat can take a while.

At the SID office, we are treated to a lovely moment between the team members, crowding around Lin Jin’s new invention: a popcorn-specific microwave.

It’s very sweet to see the team indulge in some nonsense outside of their case work, made even better by Wang Zheng being there. The fact that Zhao Yunlan is on board with his department’s time and resources being spent on a popcorn maker only makes this scene better. He is crouching on the table, because chairs are for the weak.

After inspecting the crime scene, Zhao Yunlan is spending some time outside chatting to Buttler Wu, and comments on Li Jiaqi’s good looks, since Zhao Yunlan is a man who can appreciate beauty.

As Xiao Guo is awe-struck at his boss’ ability to note someone’s prettiness from a distance, Chu Shuzhi literally rolls his eyes calling those “instincts of a beast”, and Zhao Yunlan fails to reprimand him for the remark, because… fair enough. Very fair enough. It’s hard not to relate to Zhao Yunlan, a self-admitted bi disaster.

Shen Wei is being shown his new apartment. He does not even look around it, staring instead at Zhao Yunlan’s front door across the hall from him.

Moving here is a completely senseless thing to do. How on earth is he planning to hide his Hei Pao Shi persona while being a next door neighbour to the chief of SID? My conclusion is that from a character stand-point, it’s nothing but an act of desperate devotion; from a narrative stand-point, this codifies that their relationship is about to get very intimate indeed.

The SID members are interrogating Buttler Wu: as is often the case, instead of bringing him in, like they did with Shen Wei, they hijack a cafe nearby to have a more relaxed conversation. As they talk, Shen Wei is making his way past the cafe, which both Wu Tian'en and Shen Wei notice.

Shen Wei proceed to follow Butler Wu, who calls him out on it. This leads to a removal of his glasses so epic it warrants a jump-cut to close-up, on top of the dutch angle used mere seconds prior to it.

Instantly recognizing Shen Wei as Hei Pao Shi, Wu Tian’en sinks to his knees in reverence. Again, fair enough. After having a brief conversation about their shared history, Shen Wei states that Butler Wu is not allowed to lay a hand on Zhao Yunlan.

“Chief Zhao? You’re stalking him?”

“You don’t need to know more.”

That is not a no. Mostly because that is a yes.

Shen Wei promises to not take Wu Tian’en away before the man resolves his current problems, adding that he hopes his old acquaintance won’t have any regrets when that happens. As Shen Wei walks away, he muses “Then how much time is there left for me?”

(And I have to fight an uncomfortable sinking feeling in my stomach, which is occurring a lot as I rewatch those series.)

The same evening at the SID offices the team is struggling with the case so much Da Qing suggests asking Hei Pao Shi’s help. Zhao Yunlan bristles at the idea, and… calls Shen Wei instead. Of course he does.

To be fair, he does so to check whether the other man is stalking him, but he also calls him by his given name rather Professor Shen, reinforcing that he makes this enquiry as a friend, not at as the chief of the Special Investigations Department.

During the phone call Shen Wei is absentmindedly playing with the corner of the publication he is reading.

While Yunlan does not deny that he still thinks Shen Wei is potentially up to something dodgy, he still proceeds to ask his advice on the case. This continues the dynamic from the previous episode: it’s not that Yunlan is completely blind, it’s just that he trusts Shen Wei regardless of the secrets he might be hiding.

Moving on, here’s what I have to say on he topic of bad CGI. There are several reasons in the world for a piece of visual media to have a poor quality computer animation. It could be laziness, or it could be absence of imagination, both of which are inexcusable. It also could be absence of funds, as is the case with the Guardian. And, honestly, I am alright with that. It’s not their fault, and I would much rather see this drama as it is - bad CGI and all - than none at all.

And, the quality of CGI here has energy similar to Live Action Sailor Moon (PGSM), which I honestly find both nostalgic and endearing.

That show also has a talking cat, but it’s performed by a literal plush toy on strings, so Guardian certainly wins here.

While Huang Linqi and Li Jiaqi are being kept together (possibly in an alternate dimension, seeing as how they have emerged from the lake completely dry), they talk through their relationship issues, and the audience finds itself with a sugar-sweet take on the arranged marriage/strangers to lovers trope. I feel a little bit bad about their disaster wedding now.

At the same time, Xiao Jun and Wu Tian’en’s story is a tiny echo of Shen Wei end Je Zun: the son thinks his dad left him to fend for himself when he was young and vulnerable, and distrusts the very concept of love because of that perceived abandonment. Unlike Je Zun however, he stops to have an actual conversation, which ultimately forces him to quit his senseless act of revenge, and make the first step on the path of reconciliation and redemption. This is Guardian telling us that communication skills do, in fact, matter.

He also drops this bombshell of a line, which hurts my heart a lot.

“In the face of death every love in the world is mere foam”

On an entirely separate note, I am very glad that the actor who plays Butler Wu is wearing nice thick knee pads.

They are very visible, and they make a little “boing” when he hits the ground, but the actor has to fall to his knees twice in this episode, both times on hard surfaces, one of which is literal gravel, and I’m happy that the production is being considerate of their actors’ physical well-being.

While this episode does not mark the first time Zhao Yunlan is being understanding to the Undergrounders in pain, this is the first time anti-Unvergrounder bigotry is explicitly framed in a negative light. The two evil businessmen, who cast a child aside just because he has special powers, are shown as unquestionably in the wrong. Xiao Jun is lightly scolded for his rash actions, but he is not brought back to SID in cuffs, and he is not immediately given away to Hei Pao Shi. Far from that: he is brought in softly, to spend some time at his dying father’s side.

As Butler Wu slipping away, we once more see Guo Changcheng being recklessly heroic, as he is prepared to use the Longevity Dial to share his life force. Instead of letting him do it, Zhao Yunlan snatches the Hallow away and decides to perform this particular miracle himself. This is the same man who will later sacrifice his eyesight to bring people’s lives back. Bai Yu’s acting in that moment is utterly phenomenal, showing a whole range of emotion from horror to determination to dismay in mere seconds.

Hei Pao Shi teleports in, and, without a preamble, scolds Zhao Yunlan (the first episode in the series-long “don’t touch the Hallows” saga), and then asks him whether it’s worth shortening his life for an Undergrounder. This is in equal parts a provocation and a test, because I’m fairly certain that Shen Wei was going to save Wu Tian’en anyway.

As SID members beg Hei Pao Shi to save Butler Wu in perfect unison, Zhao Yunlan states that a person is a person, regardless of their origin. Shen Wei notes inwardly that SID had changed, and, as expected, heals Butler Wu, while Yunlan stares at his power with relief and awe.

Since I have talked about the wide shot of the Dragon City, let’s talk about its counterpart in the Underworld.

I have failed to notice before that there appears to be a vast city next to the volcano river, some way away from the royal Palace, looming over it. Geographically, this makes little sense: we will see characters leave the Palace and instantly end up in a city square throughout the series, but I still really enjoy this wide shot. It is also interesting to see the architecture of the place. It is somewhere between (western) medieval abodes and futuristic shipment container blocks, with living spaces built on top of each other, crammed-in, and unpleasant. I also love the lighting here, contrasting blue and red.

Hallows random power #n: projecting their brethren. Imagine how useful it would be if they also did that for the Brush and the Lantern.

The next day, Zhao Yunlan and Da Qing are on a leisurely morning jog, while Yunlan is wearing bottoms that my partner refers to as “sheggings” (as in, shorts + leggings)

They are talking about Shen Wei, naturally. In my head-canon, Zhao Yunlan is driving his colleagues nuts because can’t help himself but bring the good professor up every goddamn minute of every goddamn day.

As they turn the corner to go home, they bump into the subject of discussion, who informs them that he moved into the building, and leaves abruptly looking more than slightly pleased with himself.

Finally, we are treated to Guo Changcheng’s surveillance exam. I don’t know why he thought this outfit would make him look less conspicuous.

Eventually, the SID will learn that some of their staff members don’t have to be fighters or detectives. In Xiao Guo, they have found the heart of their team, and that is enough.

Next up, Episode 6: The Coat Zhao Yunlan Will Buy

—

PS: I have mentioned earlier, that I have a sinking feeling as I watch Guardian, and I would like to elaborate on that. You see, I am very scared of flying. It’s an irrational fear, but it is the one I nonetheless have. There is a very specific feeling I get just as the plane starts gaining speed on the runway: there is joy, because at the end of this journey they is something to look forward to (my parents’ hugs, a drink with a friend, a favourite place, a new city to explore), but there is also a painful anticipation, as I brace for the moment the aircraft will tilt upwards, knowing that I will be pushed back into my chair by gravity, battling against an onslaught of a panic attack, shaking, learning to breathe, fighting with everything I have to keep my heart rate down. Watching Guardian from the beginning, knowing where the story is going, mirrors that feeling perfectly.

PPS: The following conversation happened with my partner as I way typing this recap.

My partner: Do you think Shen Wei ever wears sheggings?

Me: Sweetie, I think he would rather die.

#guardian #shen wei #zhao yunlan #weilan #rewatch #recap #please help I can't stop rambling

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