#so I decided to use random numbers out of spite lmao | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

skyyclan · 1 year

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I saw DND and Clangen being mentioned in the same post so HI THERE I'M A CLANGEN MASTER. Lmao, aight, I'll go ahead and explain what my friends and I have been up to because I'm chatty and this is 2AM. First step is to gather up the nonsensical beings in you closet and/or life then tell them that you're playing a funny cat game. (Very necessary.)

I got to thinking about what you could do in order to have a "fun time" in Clangen. Of course, you have tons of challenges available, but those are for solo-players. Then I got to looking at DND. Anyhow, the story ends with me gathering my friends and handing them the precious jewels of life - dices - and we can now get onto the mechanics.

Before You Begin: If you want true chaos, let the gremlins you know be in charge of coming to a consensus of what to name the Clan. Be sure to ban anything you don't want before that happens. Oh, and be aware they will spite you. If these people know DND, they will come for your soul.

First: Every player must designate a cat to play as. It can be any cat outside of an elder. Once we have our cats, the others will be NPCs. I decided to go ahead and give them a bit of lore (like, for example, Sleekfeather was previously a den mom in another Clan, but she lost all of her kits and now cannot stand anything to do with them in her grief). There's a reason for this we'll bring up later.

Second: Stat rolls! Well, more accurately, exp and ability rolls. I decided that the lowest exp a cat (who was an adult) could get was 50 and the highest was 200. We used a random number generator here to determine what number everyone was assigned. (Suggestion: Max it at 150 exp for more challenge.) Then, for the abilities, I decided to go ahead and just set up a random wheel and roll. Although, if you wanna use your shiny dice, you can totally split up the abilities into groups then assign from there. Whatever works.

Third: Everyone makes up a backstory and rename their cats if they so choose. This is important so you know who meshes with who. For example, my friend made this grumpy dude named Litterleaf who was basically a plant gremlin. Our medicine cat was also a plant gremlin, so we decided that Litterleaf and Meowingtonflower would have the beginnings of a romance added into the game. (File editing this was fun.) You're basically establishing the dynamics of your party while probably screaming on Discord.

Fourth: It's time to have fun! Your prep work is done and the campaign will tell itself. I personally established "success rolls" with everyone and the corresponding cats beforehand. Someone like Meowingtonflower, who was nice to everyone, would almost never go with do not proceed or antagonize. I had to roll a 1 for an antagonize to occur. Turn those personalities and relationships into numbers, folks! Though, if that doesn't fit ya, you can always do a random wheel that splits everything up for you.

I like to do around 6 or 12 moons per game. It gives me plenty of time to edit the files as needed and weave in plot points. Right now, we have an uprising against the tyrant leader being plotted... but it's being headed by a Dark Forest cat who keeps whispering in our ears. The tyrant has a secret past where she had a loving family, but someone took that away. Her mind is scrambled and her thoughts are going wild. She can't take it anymore.

I highly suggest going into this with no plot and letting the generator tell a story for about 6 or so moons. After that, you can either make a plot to work in or tell what's being told. Usually, it's a fun afternoon/night with your friends where you scream. One of my friends was on the verge of tears as her cat, Gloryglitter, was nabbed by twolegs then returned the next day with a hot random dude and, after saying she wanted to Gloryglitter romance him, she rolled a nat 20. I hadn't even figured out who this dude was yet. It just happened and we all had to accept it. (I named him George and he was a random himbo who has the brain of a pebble, but he loves kids and he'll love you too.)

Once a cat retires or dies, I let my friends do one of two things: grab a child (or (great-)grandchild) their character had and spring off of them or we go randomize a new character (with minor tweaks allowed) on CatGen. They can also just choose a random NPC, but I found that I got attached to my NPCs and refused to let go. Similar happens if the cat gets lost. In the case a cat is lost, we generally accept that the player has two characters now. That's what ended up happening in Gloryglitter's situation. We had another cat picked out and then Gloryglitter returned the moment we hit next moon.

Oh, and if you wanna add in some magic... I know someone on the Clangen Discord has a magical cat sprite mod. I forget who, but I know one awesome person made it, so... Go check that out if it's of interest!

This might not make sense, BUT- I'm not a logical creature. Little TL;DR: If you wanna DND your Clangen up, lasso all the people you know and force them to play. You can use random wheels to determine your outcome instead of dice. DND Clangen is doable and a lot of fun. You will mourn when the favorite dies.

Sorry for the massive wall of text!! Uh... Yeah! DND Clangen is a lot of fun. I'm currently considering how to just - *grabs Clangen and shakes* - truly turn it into a battle cat DND game. That's for another day and season. Have a good one and stay murderous!

Hey anon I am kissing you on the mouth

Really tho I love this, like this sounds like such a good time and thank you for bringing it into my life I'm going to brainrot so hard over it

#ask #clangen #clangen dnd #fav post

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atopearth · 2 years

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BUSTAFELLOWS Part 1 - Limbo Fitzgerald Route

Hmmm, I like how the MC is voiced, that's quite rare. Teuta is a funky name. Anyway, it seems like she has the power to go back into the past into someone else's body? Seems limited to just a few minutes or hours before the present though, so I guess we'll see how useful this ability will become. Anyway, when the guys were kinda introduced, I honestly thought Helvetica was the font they were using for the game or something and not his name😂😂😂 My bad lol. Shu looks the most interesting to me. Mozu seems like an eccentric head coroner? Limbo just seems dodgy and up himself lol. Teuta and her childhood friends were so cute in their childhood! It's so nice how she trusts them enough to share her powers with them. The things that Limbo says lolll, really can't imagine a real lawyer saying stuff like that, or even the silly judge we saw for his introduction lol, but I'll try and ignore it🥲 His number being 1-800-NO-GUILT is hilarious🤣🤣 Gotta admit that even though Teuta's power is cool, it's very inconvenient considering she goes back in time to a random person's body and she can't decide how long it goes back either... Quite a risky power, and what happens if she dies in the body she's in? Btw I love the backdrop of the city!! It's so cool how it moves!! Lmao at Teuta, I love how the first thing she says when she sees him (after going back into her body) was that she's so glad he didn't die🤣🤣

Ooh, Shu is a bounty hunter! BAHAHA, I love how Teuta's first impression of Shu was that he felt like a creep🤣🤣🤣 Anyway, Helvetica is very...interesting, definitely rude to rate people to their faces but he's weird so what can we do~ Ooh so Limbo and them are all Fixers, working to protect what they think is right with their own methods. Helvetica pretending to be a woman is pretty cool! It's nice to see what all their roles are in an operation. Lmaooo at Teuta being a pro at understanding her landlady, she just keeps saying "that" and refers to "that", it was so funny how Limbo was utterly confused🤣 As usual, the best way for the heroine to bond with the LIs is of course to destroy her place so she's forced to live with them! Lmao, I guess Scarecrow is like our chuunibyou kinda character🤣 He's so silly to try and act like a cool underworld boss🤣 Lmaoo at how Scarecrow has a jar where everyone has to pay a fine if they trash talk him, so everyone starts paying ahead so they can trash talk him all they want🤣 I'm so glad the money they threw away was actually fake because dang, it would be a waste lol, I was like at least donate it to charity! Valerie (Limbo's sister) is funny🤣 I loved how she asked him to take a case and she then imitates his voice and says yes, then just says thank you to herself lmao.

Scarecrow is like a little kid, he's so cute lmao. Anima really likes to spite him even though she's his AI🤣 Mozu being the mum of the team making food for everyone is cute. I'm so glad Luka is watching out for Teuta since she just randomly moved in with a bunch of guys haha. We know they're "safe" but I would really worry as a friend too lol. Like, I know Mozu is indifferent to most things and sees everything from the perspective of autopsies, but omggg when he tried to take a "spare apron" from his workplace back to their home to cook with. It was funny, but I'm just imagining all the diseases, bacteria and everything, especially since Teuta said there was a bloodstain on it!! Omggggg lol. Lmao when Teuta pretended to hold Scarecrow at gunpoint at the bar, so silly but cute🤣 It was very nice of Shu to try and tell Edie the "weight" you carry for killing someone to dissuade him from doing things he's not prepared for. Teuta was really cool too! I love how she told Edie that just as she doesn't understand the people who live in Black Hawk, he also doesn't understand people "like her" who live in "better places", and that's why they should try to understand each other. No one can know everything, but everyone can have the willingness to learn about the things and people they don't know and talk to them to try and understand them. The moment you give up on trying to understand is when you'll stop learning and that won't help anyone.

Even though Scarecrow can be kindaaa cringe at times, it's really sweet how he's trying to watch out for Teuta, and I think it's really cute how he enjoys eating breakfast with everyone in the morning now, since they used to just come for work and then leave, so Scarecrow was always alone. I'm not really surprised that Shu is a "killer killer" since it kinda suits him to kill hitmen. Hehe, I decided to try doing the personality test myself to see what I would get. It's kinda amusing to be called similar to Helvetica haha😅😅 I guess I would have gone on the Helvetica route if I did my own choices? Anyway, with the second test, it's kinda funny but I chose to not pick an option because I would condemn them all regardless since they're all unforgivable in their own rights imo. Understandable but unforgivable. But yeah, it felt kinda awkward when not picking kinda made it seem like you're indecisive, but I feel like there would be people like me who wouldn't pick not because you can't pick but because you refuse to let go of what each one did. I guess if I really had to pick, I'd probably go for the classmates or the parents, which is what you pick for Limbo?

I know Limbo has a good heart and just wants to help Edie, but he's basically "teaching" and influencing Edie into believing he shot Roscoe to protect himself. I don't deny that it's probably the truth even if his intentions initially were to go there to get revenge on Roscoe for killing his father, but the fact is that Limbo is not really asking Edie questions, they're all rhetorical and made to assure Edie that this is what he did and what he thought without giving him the space to think for himself what exactly happened. I think the biggest problem is that since Edie is young and this is a big shock for him considering Roscoe really ended up dying by his hands (assumed), he's just going to think of what Limbo said "as the truth" and want to believe that it's the truth, which is the wrong way to go about it imo. I'm happy Teuta cares about Edie enough to want to go back to the past and change things to stop Edie from having to carry the burden of having killed a person, and I'm glad that even though Shu is still sceptical about the whole thing, he said that if she can change it, then he wants her to do it too. I think it was good of Shu to actually bother making it more difficult for himself to plan the bulletproof vest and toy gun etc to make sure that Edie can actually experience shooting Roscoe and then realise that this is not what he wants, rather than just outright stopping him from shooting Roscoe. This way, Edie can understand what exactly killing the guy involves and give up on revenge and focus on protecting his family and taking care of them.

Tbh, sometimes with Carmen, I can't help but think that I'm not playing an otome game because she feels so...created for a male audience? Lol, if that makes sense. Like her character, her huge boobs and everything just feels out of place in this game tbh😅😅 Anyway, I'm glad Teuta decided to stay with Mozu after he might have been infected with a virus, and I love how the guys also stayed too, they're all so cute. I hope the doctor Teuta had her consciousness go into is all right...especially the patient she needed to do an operation on... I'm sure she must have wasted a lot of time trying to contact Luka in that timeframe.. but maybe this will show Teuta the consequences of her going back in time, something like the doctor losing her job and a patient dying showing that just as Teuta tries to save someone precious to her, someone precious to another person could die because of the things she changed. Anyway, Adam is such a great big brother character for Teuta, he's so sweet and caring. Aww, kinda obvious Hilda was going to die but I felt bad for him since he wanted to help Scarecrow and them. It's pretty funny seeing Luka being like a slave to Valerie carrying her shopping bags and calling her "nee-sama" lmao. I'm glad the doctor's patient didn't die, and I'm glad the doctor didn't lose her job, but I'm not sure if this result is any better. The patient's leg had to be amputated, and the doctor's banned from the operating room, and who knows if her career will get back on track considering this hit on her reputation and reliability as a doctor for making a call during such a time... Honestly, it's an unfortunate situation all around. Teuta can't control whose body she goes into, but I doubt she'll ever stop using her power if someone important to her dies for whatever reason, but this could change the lives of others in a drastic way, so it's sad. I mean, sure, even if she didn't have powers, her decisions can affect the lives of others without her even noticing, but the difference is that Teuta gets another chance to change things at the expense of others. Yeah, maybe it's not always as drastic of a change as this one, but even with the pickpocket prisoner guy from the beginning of the story, I'm sure the police would be more wary of him because he supposedly seemed to know Limbo, said he would reveal whatever and stuff, and honestly, Teuta never went to check back on him so I actually do wonder what happened to him lol. I guess I'm just glad she's understanding a bit better the consequences of using her powers even if she won't really stop using it.

Aww, I love how Limbo convinced her to open the letter with her results about an award together, and then let go in the last second so she would open the letter herself since it's something so important that she should open it herself. He gave her the push and the courage and I think that's great. When Irina asked what Limbo would want for his last meal in this world, I couldn't help but think about what I would choose. Honestly, I would love to have sushi for my last meal, especially toro and stuff, but I think in the end, I am the typical person, I really would just want to eat my mum's cooking, I think I could die happily after eating her tofu or tomato pork chop hahaha. Sad to realise that Irina is a victim of human trafficking and literally slaved away for a famous fashion brand. Lmao when Teuta wanted to go disguising as a model for Fashion Week, I have to admit that my reaction was the same as Limbo and Helvetica. I was like, I like your spirit girl, but you're definitely too short. Helvetica is definitely the best choice, especially since he can change his voice, and he's used to going undercover. As usual, Helvetica as a woman is beautiful, Shu in a suit just looks awkward to me hahahah. Irina admitting that she actually killed her roommate was expected but sad, I feel sorry for the poor girl who finally found freedom, only to be killed by her good friend who was jealous that she was able to escape the hell she couldn't. Anyway, I completely forgot Limbo was supposed to be a "crooked lawyer", and now that it's explained that people call him that mostly because of his pro bono cases dealing with people like Edie just makes me go chehhhh lol. When this game first started, I wanted to see how they would handle a crooked lawyer but really he's just a kind and wholesome guy helping disadvantaged people, and it's nice but I'm disappointed lol. Oh well.

Adam is so sweet! I love how he took the time to congratulate Teuta with a beautiful bouquet of blue roses and made sure to tell her and thank her for saving Luka. She's been so distraught over the consequences of saving Luka that knowing someone appreciated her efforts despite the consequences would be comforting. OMG, dang, I honestly thought Carmen would wear something like Valerie's swimsuit, didn't expect Valerie to be the super wild one lolll. Needless to say, Valerie definitely looks the best, especially the hair and the earring, she is 10/10 hot. Teuta's way too cute for me haha. I agree with Shu's comment, it's a bit childish hahahah. HAHAHA, Valerie bought the swimsuit for Teuta after asking Limbo what kinda swimsuit he thinks looks good🤣🤣🤣 I guess Limbo likes cute girls🙃 I can't wait to see the different swimsuits Teuta will wear depending on which route I'm on! I need to see Shu's tastes like right nowww. I kinda wish we got a CG with Limbo and Teuta in their swimsuits though, we didn't even get eye candy for any of the guys😭

I apologise if Navid is actually an okay person but I honestly doubt it because he seems like an ass. Not only did he rudely take Teuta's phone to put his phone number in, he purposely didn't let Limbo know she'll be there at their meetup for a bit, talked about stuff Limbo doesn't like to bring up and talks about it all like it's fun or something. He's probably a psycho. Anyway, lol, he pisses me off because he makes excuses like he would be uncomfortable meeting up with Limbo and wanted her to break the ice but seriously, no one is forcing him to catch up with Limbo, he's the one who suggested it and pushed it, so nah he's definitely an ass, he definitely likes seeing Limbo suffer. Lmao at Scarecrow thinking of putting the frozen turkey into the dryer because they forgot to thaw it🤣 I thought it was really sweet how Limbo told Teuta to invite Luka and Adam over for Thanksgiving after their work is done since they're Teuta's family. Teuta might not be able to share this happiness with her brother Zola anymore, but she still has Luka and Adam. It was sweet how Limbo wiped Teuta's tears. I really love Valerie. Seeing how pissed off and worried she was for Limbo after he got arrested was kinda scary especially with her VA, but I was impressed!

It was sad to see everyone want to help Limbo but he couldn't express his thoughts and feelings properly because of what happened in his past. I think it was cute how Limbo hugged Teuta considering how emotionally exhausted he must be. Limbo's story was tough.. Anyway, I feel bad for saying this but I think I can empathise with Navid's emotions more right now lol. Well, Teuta is crying for Limbo so I guess I can sympathise with Navid instead, I mean he's a very calm but crazy guy but yeah.. I do feel terrible for Limbo though because they were good friends, but Navid chose to compromise his morals to protect someone important to him and buy the woman and child he wanted to save knowing how "wrong" it was even though he's been fighting with Limbo against these human traffickers for so many years. So I can understand why Limbo felt "betrayed" and I can understand why he wouldn't compromise his morals for it, I just think it was terrible of the woman to suicide (after her child died) and call Limbo to witness it so he can be guilty forever over her death, which is obviously messed up but she's not in the right state of mind so I guess we can be relieved that she didn't decide to try and take Limbo with her. Anyway, I feel like I can better recognise Navid's hatred towards Limbo. Always thought he was a petty guy because yeah it was Limbo's fault he lost his licence to be a lawyer, but he only did the "right thing" so it's unreasonable, but now I can see that losing his right to being a lawyer wasn't why he hates Limbo. He hates Limbo because his actions made him unable to save the woman and child he wanted to save. Considering how long they've been friends and fighting for their causes for, knowing that Navid still chose to risk his career and discard his morals for her just goes to show how important she and the child were to him, and that breaks my heart. It's not right of him to blame Limbo since he should be blaming the human traffickers, but I can see why he would hate Limbo so much, because if he bought her etc, it must have meant this was the only conceivable way at that moment to save her and Limbo jeopardised it because of his sense of "justice" and stuff like rules and laws that disregard human emotions which Navid prioritises. It's just a sad situation all around tbh.

I want to say I appreciate Helvetica and them intervening, but I think it was super silly for them to try and force Navid out of town without properly checking if he was really leaving or not. They better be pretending to fall for Navid's "trap" because it's ridiculous for them to even think that Navid would just let go of all this and leave. Limbo being naive is kinda understandable since he sincerely wants to make up with Navid, but honestly I don't feel like they've really talked honestly about their feelings together, so I don't blame Navid for continuing to hate him, even though he's crazy. But yeah anyway, I expected more from Shu and them. Considering how crazy and murderous Navid has been, I'm surprised it took until Limbo had to "die once" for him to understand that Navid will continue to torture him and the people around him as long as he lives. Honestly, in a sense, Navid probably thinks of it as Limbo's duty to "bring him to justice" so he can stop being tortured by the past too, it was just either Limbo dies first or he gets arrested first. But yeah, with how much Navid's existence endangered the people around him, Limbo should have done something about him ages ago instead of thinking they could "make up" when the guy was constantly making threats towards killing him and the people around him, that's not something you can just brush off and be friends again after. Honestly, I'm surprised Navid didn't do something like blow up that hotel where he met up with Limbo because if I was him, that's what I would have done. Regardless, it's sad to see things end up like this, especially since Navid never properly told Limbo why he did what he did back then, and Limbo never asked him properly until it was basically too late. Anyway, Teuta and Limbo are cute and it is nice to see them live quite peacefully as Valerie chews them out, I love how quickly Teuta sold out Limbo when he said he wanted to put his sister in her place lmao. The bad endings basically answered my questions of "why didn't Navid do that?" lol and even though it was terrible for Teuta and Limbo, I'm glad we had those endings, I love pain🥲 As for the Side B and extras, I thought it was so cute seeing Teuta and Limbo on a fancy date and then going to eat their favourite chicken wings, it was sweet seeing how much they wanted to make the other happy as they awkwardly did things. I love the Luka and Adam support group helping Teuta pick out her outfit haha.

Overall, I can't say I'm impressed with Limbo's route, I knew it was short so I didn't expect much but I think the way they handled the ending was pretty bad. I absolutely thought the nanomachines thing and Helvetica and them intervening without actually properly solving the problem for Limbo and possibly having made it even more difficult for Limbo in the end killed me, because they never followed up on Navid knowing how crazy he was! Yeah, I was so done by then tbh. Otherwise, I actually really enjoyed how much of a nut Navid was because I felt like I actually could understand his situation and his feelings, his strong emotions and how much he really hated Limbo for ruining everything. As I said before, I feel slack but I do feel like in terms of their characters, I liked Navid more than Limbo because Limbo was just kinda bland to me. He was nice, he was kind and he's good support but he's not very interesting for a LI. I honestly hope Shu is better🥲

#bustafellows

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vannybarber · 3 years

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The Prenup: Part Two

Summary: After four years of being together and finally being engaged, Chris wants you to sign a prenup.

Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, chris getting his ass handed to him, a lot of pain.

Part One

Walking down the isle, you grab everything that looks remotely pleasing in sight. After you left the house, you were just driving nowhere. Having to refill your tank because you wasted all the gas, the crackhead at the station kept singing Mambo Number 5 and it made you feel slightly better. Now you were in the convenience store spending your feelings away.

You get to the pain pills and grab some Aleve. Your head has been thumping for hours now. You see a pink box and knock a couple of those in the basket too just because they're pink. Whipping over to the candy isle, you grab multiple bags of Starburst jelly beans just to spite Chris because you know he loves them. Moments later, your basket it full and you head to the front.

Tipping the basket, you dump all the contents on the counter. The cashier gives you this look and you don't blame her. You had 3 bags of jellybeans, 5 random candy bars, 2 pink boxes you still can't read out, a blue Mountain Dew, a dog toy and some Doritos. Absolutely random. The cashier scans all the junk food, but when she gets to the pink boxes, she look up at you and at your left hand.

You're in a daze, so you don't see her looking at you. Your mind was all over the place and frankly, you didn't want to think about any of the latest events. Not the prenup. Not the engagement. Not Chris. Snapping into reality, you pay for your groceries and take all the bags and walk out the store.

On the drive to the hotel, you pass the park where you and Chris met. That didn't help with your predicament at all.

Dodger had gotten off his leash because he was so excited to finally have a home. You were with your niece. She is so obsessed with dogs and wanted to meet every one. Dodger spotted her and pounced on her, giving infinite kisses.

Chris was freaking out. His dog just pounced on a two year old child.

You, on the other hand, were laughing your ass off. Your niece wasn't complaining either because she kissed him back.

He apologized profusely and you guaranteed him it was okay. You guys hung out for the rest of the day and decided to go on another date, without the kids. One date lead to many others and soon enough you'd met his whole family, vice versa, and started living with him. It was unreal.

And here you are infront of a hotel, with no ring or engagement and your fianceé almost an hour away. Oh, how the tables have turned.

You get out and receive your room key. You head up to your room and set everything down. You were so tired and worn out. Getting comfortable in the bed, you knock out almost immediately.

Meanwhile, back at your house, it's pure chaos.

"Chris do you realize what the fuck you just did?"

Scott is practically screaming at his brother, pacing around the room.

"Scott can you fucking chill? You're not helping the situation" Chris snapped back at him. Scott stops and stares at him like he's an idiot.

"We wouldn't be in this situation if it wasn't for your stupid choices. Tell him Ma!" He looks at her to back him up. Lisa stands up from her seat and walks over to Chris.

"Now Scott, Chris is a grown man. He can handle this situation, right honey?" Her hands are on both his shoulders, looking for him to respond.

"There you go. You always do this! You always baby him up whenever he's in trouble." He rolls his eyes. Lisa draws back from Chris.

"No, I do not. I let all of you sort out your own issues, with my advice of course. Shanna, Carly, do I baby your brother?" Chris throws his head back in annoyance.

"Um, yeah kinda.."

"Sometimes...Ma, but not all the time of course"

They say at the same time. They hated to admit it but when it came to Chris, she mostly got him out his problems. He's not used to solving them on his own. Lisa utters incoherent words in disbelief.

"That's not important right now. My fianceé just called off our engagement and I don't know where she is!" Chris interrupts, getting everyone back into focus.

"Technically she's not your fianceé if she called the engagement off, but it's whatever..." Scott mumbles with his hands up. Chris shoots him a 'fuck off look'.

"Well have you tried calling her?" Carly asks him.

"Yes, but she's not picking up. She can hold quite the grudge when it comes to her feelings." And he was right. You were very protective of your feelings and anything to harm that will be shut down ASAP.

"Well we just have to hope that she is trusting her better judgment and will come back, unlike someone in the room" Scott says sarcastically turning and sitting on the couch. Chris smacks his lips.

"Scott that's enough!" Lisa snaps.

"Well he deserves everything he's getting! He put himself in this situation. Now he doesn't have a wife and he's miserable. Could never be me."

Chris had enough. He moved quickly put his chair and into the bedroom, slamming the door shut. He sat at the edge of the bed and cried.

You had finally woken up and check your phone.

26 missed calls | 63 messages.

You text Lisa and tell her you're fine. Closing the app, you look at your homescreen. It's a picture of Chris laying on your chest asleep. His lips are parted and you're grinning in the screen. He looks like an adorable puppy. You grab your charger out your bag and plug it up.

Remembering the stuff you bought, you grab the jellybeans and open them. Seeing the assortment of colors, you go straight for the red ones. Chris' favorite. You were gonna milk this to the bone. You reach in the bag and feel one of the pink boxes you bought. Still not knowing what it was, you pull it out and read it.

First Response Pregnancy

You bought a damn pregnancy test. 2 to be exact. You didn't know if you wanted to laugh or to smack yourself for wasting your money. Many thoughts went through your mind. Should you take the tests? Should you throw it away? What if you were pregnant? That last thought gave you shivers. Pregnant at a time like this? Were you even ready?

Looking down at the test, you decide to take it. Just for the hell of it. You knew you weren't gonna be pregnant because you take birth control. Not to mention you and Chris use condoms for extra measure. Nothing wrong with being safe.

You get up, pad to the bathroom and get down to business. You do all the steps and clean up after yourself. Now you just had to wait.

You were nervous as hell. You don't know why though. There isn't a chance you could be pregnant because you didn't allow there be one. You have been beyond careful. There would be zero possibility. Or so you thought.

After what felt like 5 minutes, your shakey hand grab the test and flip it over.

| |

You freeze and your eyes dart to the information section.

Not Pregnant- |

Pregnant- | |

You look back at the results. There were two lines. Absentmindedly, you shake your head and back up until your back hits the wall. You can't be pregnant. There's literally no freaking way. It's got to be false.

You grab the other test and take it. After 5 more minutes, you check it and there's two lines also. Now you were freaking the fuck out. Both tests are positive. You rush back in the room and dig through the bag for the other box. You grab it and take both tests at the same time. Don't ask.

After another 5 minutes, you stare at the back of the two tests. Moment of truth. You flip both the tests at the same time.

| | on each test.

This is where you fall on the floor in shock and fear. You were pregnant. With Chris' child. And you guys just had a huge fall out and you're all alone. You're not ready for a kid. Especially not now.

You bury your head in your hands and let the tears fall. How in the hell were you gonna tell him?

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@flattykawa1 @mayafatimakhan @attitude-times @shawn-youth @traceyaudette @fantasticinternetpizza @kyraroseficreblogs33 @radi0active-thoughts @youthought-iwasa-nicegirl @ohbarracuda @katelyneannxo @jennamarieee623 @nicochantez @craycraycraic @ilikeurdad @ppal3 @captainson-of-coul @joanne-stan @ilovetheeagles @cristinagronk16 @kelbabyblue @onyourgoddamnleft @jessyballet @misz-adrii @geminievans1 @saltyflowermakertaco @a-moment-captured @harrysthiccthighss @greatbatprofessordragon

i hope this part kept you guys' intrest like the first part😭 i felt the pressure today lmao

if you're bolded, i couldn't tag you. i'll personally message you ❤ thank you guys for your support. it means so much to me 🤧

#cevans #chris evans #avengers #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #andy barber smut #steve rogers smut #captain america #chris evans fluff #chris evans smut

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allhailthesanders · 3 years

Text

Random JATP Headcannon: The Wilson’s and Street Food

Do you ever think about how after the boy’s death Bobby was probably extremely weary of all take-out, street food, and basically all food that he can’t see how it is prepared? Because I do! SO I decided to write a headcannon about it.

I mean my man watched his three brothers die a horribly painful death because they wanted to have a quick bite to eat. Don’t think about how he was probably the person who found them dying from food poisoning, in excruciating pain probably scared out of their goddamn minds. Don’t think about him clutching their bodies sobbing. Don’t think about how Bobby 100% most definitely didn’t eat anything for the next few days after the guys’ death. Don’t think about how he was probably too scared to trust any foods that he doesn’t make himself. But honestly, he is terrible at cooking that was Reggie’s and Alex’s jobs. I mean he can make a couple of Filipino recipes that his Lola taught him how to make like halo-halo, adobo, liempo sinigang rice.

Then eventually, he started to eat again, well not exactly, I mean Dr. Crystal seemed hopeful. But like he would go to restaurants with like multiple EFFING Michelin Stars and like refuse the food because he’s so scared that he might choke, or get food poisoning and die like the others. Like he low-key throws a tantrum because he is freaking and upsets the chef, but can you blame him?

Without any contexts the public and gossip magazines were like:

“woah I know he’s a rock star but what a spoiled brat”

“TREVOR WILSON: A FOOD SNOB?!?!”

“I Can’t Believe (It’s Not Butter sorry back to the headcannon lol) That This Rising Star Threw His Soup at the Chef a Michelin Star Restaurant”

(It was completely by accident btw!!! The matching friendship ring with the guys fell in the soup and he didn’t want to lose another part of his friends. So he started to rush to the bathroom with the soup to find the ring and fix it. .....and the chef just happened to be right behind.....and the gazpacho just happened to spill all over him. But he did get the ring so..... that’s good!!! But he also cried a bunch washing the tomato off of it tho)

Rose started to swing by his house every couple of days with bags full of ingredients and she checks in with him as she is making classic Puerto Rican comfort foods. She quickly realized that his vegetarianism wasn’t a lie and adjusted the recipes that she grew up with to suit his needs. Rose also realizes that if Bobby doesn’t know how a certain food is made and if he can’t see all the ingredients that went into it then he would refuse to eat it. So she fell into a pattern where she would cook at his mansion as he looks over her shoulder seeing how she make the dishes, sadly laughing at the terrible dad jokes she makes. (The jokes remind him of the one Reggie use to make)

Rose “The Queen of Meal Prepping Before Meal Prepping was Popular” makes enough food the next couple of days. Together they would sit down together to enjoy a meal. Rose just tells him it was to make sure that she made the recipe correctly. But really it was to ease his anxiety about eating and to prove that the food isn’t poison. However, deep down it was to also show him that it is okay to make new friends and the boys probably would have wanted him to at least try to move on a little. Quickly Rose discovered that his favorite dishes are arroz con gandules (basically white rice with peas and olives), mofongo (think like mashed potatoes but with plantains), and some many pasteles and empanadas. And even after Julie and Carrie were born they have family dinners once per week that Rose cooked.

Well I mean until her chemo started of course because that when the roles started to reverse..... (but I’ve given y’all enough angst today, so that’s a story for another time)

I mean at some point he probably had to learn how to cook for himself and Carrie or at the very least he goes to a restaurant that personally shows him how the food is prepared/ he can see most of the steps on how it is prepared. Like one time The number of professional chefs my manz personally knows is ridiculous!!! I mean once he became FILTHY LIKE DIRTY LIKE I WOULD EAT HIM rich he definitely got a personal chef to either meal prep or cooks meals for both him and Carrie.

Bobby had one of the worst anxiety attacks of his life (I mean other than when he found out the guys died) when Carrie was 7. She went to Flynn’s birthday party at an arcade and found out that she ate cheese pizza and hot dogs (I mean Lukie, Lexington, and Reg died from street glizzies for fuck’s sake). Sobbing he called Rose freaking out as he drove Carrie (who was blissfully ignorant singing along to the Kidz Bop CD she got from the party favor) to the ER. “Rose I can’t lose another person who I love” Rose right before she had to perform at a gig she convinced him to turn around and go back home.

This is @iamthefryiestfrench-blog genius idea and I love it so, so much but Carrie and Bobby definitely started to cook dinner together like a couple times a week as Father-Daughter bonding time. Well until Carrie started to get super busy with Dirty Candy and before Trevor started touring again at that point they started to drift away. Fights started to happen more frequently. Carrie started to get more and more take-out to spite Trevor, but she didn’t realize that Trevor stopped eating again. A major fight erupted after Trevor passed out from hunger a couple of weeks after the Orphuem concert.

“Carrie sweetie it is NOT DRUGS”

“Then why did I walk in to you knocked out on the floor”

“I just hadn’t had time to eat today mahal”

“Dad do not lie to me! I cannot lose another person who I love. I can’t Dad. I’m going to call Dr. Crystal!!!”

And that was when the truth was revealed...

Carrie’s channel is slowly started to be sponsored by hello fresh, cookunity, or blue apron every single week without fail. Both of them wouldn’t admit it, but this was her offering the olive branch and Trevor took it IMMEDIATELY. (He missed cooking with his little girl). And in the sponsorship ad you would see Trevor cooking a meal with his hair in little pigtails with pink scrunchies.

Of course, they get the vegetarian meals and if you use here promo code “DIRTYCANDI10” then you can get up to 10 meals for free!!! So thank you so much Hello Fresh for sponsering today’s video!!!

It took almost 25 years but cooking with Carrie again made things feel almost alright again and that’s all Bobby could have asked for.

A/N: Hi! Thanks for reading this it was really fun to write :) (because I love to write pain lmao) But please let me know if you want to be added to my taglist down below by either replying to this post, reblogging this post, or sending me an ask! I would appreciate reblogs and feedback because I love reading your guy's comments and tags they seriously make my day but it's fine if you don't want to :)!!!

~✨My Taglist is Under the Cut Lol✨~

@poppin-peters, @sunset-bobby, @theobligatedklutz, @soupforfree, @iamthefryiestfrench-blog

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zosonils-art · 3 years

Note

👀 may we know more about rhythm man?

we sure may!!!!! rhythm dump under the cut as always

rhythm man was made to do a variety of tasks relating to sound! mostly he either does sound checks for important devices like hydrophones, sonar, seti listening devices, stuff like that, or he analyses the audio that they pick up in greater detail than any human or almost any computer can. someone [probably dr light, who created him] showed him a rhythm game pretty early in his life, and he instantly fell in love with the game genre and, more significantly, the concept of music itself. he's still doing the job he was designed for, but his real passion and arguably what he's better known for in-universe is creating music, which he uses his intricate understanding of audio to excel at

he makes a point of being a cool guy to be around! he's nice, fun-loving, and always has a joke ready. he's very encouraging of others, and thinks everyone should get to chase their dreams and do what makes them happy. when there's no bright side for him to look on, though, he doesn't really know how to act, and as such he feels uncomfortable confronting serious emotional situations and has a bad habit of repressing any negative feelings he doesn't know how to deal with and just letting them get worse. he might be developing some resentment towards his work for how much of his time it takes up that he'd rather be spending pursuing his interests, but oops that's not a fun feeling! better bottle it up and not think about it

all robots are neurodivergent but rhythm in particular has SO much undiagnosed adhd. he [probably] doesn't mind his job, but he can't pretend to be nearly as enthusiastic about it as he is his music, and tends to come off as distracted and spacey when he's at work. he's also capable of entering a hyperfocus-like state that temporarily re-allocates computing power usually dedicated to spatial awareness and sensory processing to focus on something else, which was designed to let him analyse audio with even more precision. rhythm occasionally uses this feature as intended, but more often finds himself turning it on while he's making music or playing a game to get into the groove more

he'll gladly enjoy any genre of music, but anything under the electronic umbrella is his favourite to listen to and create, especially bass music and all its subgenres! outside of genre preferences he likes songs with a lot of tiny bits and pieces and intricate details to notice - i think he'd really enjoy bill wurtz's music, for instance, due to just how much is going on in almost every song. he posts the music he makes online, and has a pretty sizeable following for both the novelty of a robot that makes music and the fact that everything he makes genuinely slaps super hard. being a robot, his criteria for 'good' music is all very simple and objective stuff like whether it's in key or has a time signature that makes sense or follows a pattern rather than just being random sounds, so he's able to appreciate almost any music for what it is and can name the number of songs he actively dislikes on one hand, although despite his best efforts to be forgiving he's a bit of an audio quality snob

the only sound he genuinely doesn't like is white noise, because the total lack of a discernable pattern or anything notable freaks him out. it's hard-coded into him to try and find meaningful noise in very fuzzy sound, and even if he analyses it back and forth on every level and concludes that it's just random aural static he's still left with a feeling of unease about it. his headphones have a sort of noise-cancelling mode that completely blocks out most background noise so he can maintain a conversation without constantly pausing to overanalyse everything he hears - without the noise cancelling he's got the world's worst case of auditory processing disorder. he's weak to psychic cry because it's just a really violent blast of white noise, and is one of the only bosses susceptible to its stunning effect because the sound freaks him out so badly he has to stop for a moment to force himself to ignore it

almost everything about rhythm came from the idea i had for his stage! i imagine it functioning as a sort of rhythm platformer where almost every moving part is timed to the beat of the stage music. it's the obligatory yoku block-spamming stage of the game, but in theory if you follow the music and jump across in time with the beat you'll make it through without much trouble [and maybe even have fun! in a stage with *yoku blocks!!*]. other stuff like constantly-spawning enemies and the attack patterns of rhythm himself would also be on that same beat cycle! as for theming, his stage is a mostly-vertical climb up a radio tower - wily's reprogramming takes his repressed frustration over not always getting to focus on his passion and upgrades it to outright spite, and he decides that actually you WILL listen to his mixtape whether you want to or not and proceeds to hijack the biggest radio tower in mosteropolis and override every single station with lofi beats to take over the world to

rhythm is the first robot master idea i ever had that wasn't a reference to something else, although for a pretty long time he was only a stage idea and a name. maybe that's why his design changed more throughout his development than any of the other guys [even between the sketch and the final lineart for this art i refined his look like 3 times]. initially he had a more 'tough'/punk-ish look, with spikes on his helmet and around his wrists and ankles, but i ended up phasing most of those elements out in favour of the led lights and generally less intimidating look. i briefly considered having his design reference rhythm heaven somehow, since it's my favourite rhythm game and the only one i'm any good at lmao, but nothing came of that - perhaps his stage enemies could have some rh references in their ranks instead, chuck some screwbots up there or something. he also had massive anime sunglasses at some point but it's better for that design to never see the light of day

he also likes dancing! hence his funky moves in the art. his body shape isn't compatible with every dance style what with the clunky robot limbs and having a stereo for a chest, and he definitely wasn't built for physical agility, but with a little practice he can pick up most dance moves no problem. he's definitely a dance battler, and i think he would love rhythm games that trick you into exercising like dance dance revolution or just dance. rhythm man does a frame perfect ddr tas in real-time on an actual cabinet

that about wraps it up for the rhythm infodump, thank you for asking about him!! as always here's the unfiltered and transparent versions of his artwork

#i'm really proud of myself for coming up with the quaver headphones. i think those look neat #zos draws #mega man #mega man oc #robot master oc #rhythm man #zos answers #zos talks #anon #zoriginal characters

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jiminrings · 3 years

Note

honestly i could talk w band!hobi abt numbers all day, like i wouldn't even mind. what are ur thoughts on 27 hobi? i think they a bad bitch. also UM might i request a drabble abt like a film major! yn (that is very enthusiastic abt films and the aesthetics + cinematography and whatnot) w like,,, a theatre kid?? any of ot7 works fine and it's all good if u can't or don't want to! thankyouu 💜

muse of mine

pairing: namjoon x y/n

wordcount: 4k

glimpse: namjoon’s always been a little sensitive to feedback whether it’s positive or negative, y/n’s an endearing type of talker, and smuggled snacks to the theater haven’t ever tasted this sweet :D // gif from pinterest!

notes: i kinda switched it up a lil bit and made them more established in their respective fields bc my mind went berserk on this concept!!! also this is mayhaps my oNLY piece that’s just pure fluff

“27? The number? Hmm. That sounds... sexy.” - band!hobi

this been’s bugging you for the past half hour

this whole experience feels oddly familiar

you’ve been in this theater for half an hour so far to watch this play!!

lmao ur gonna admit RIGHT off the bat that theatre’s definitely not it for you

your slight unfondness for it is deeply-rooted back to university and for four years, you’ve consistently taken dumps on theatre kids even if it’s under your breath

alright it’s possible that you don’t hATE the actual people ( only some of them ;D ) themselves but rather this whole type of cockiness and the “i’m a direct descendant of shakespeare himself. trust me bro. on god” energy that they always seem to exhude

but realistically, maybe this deep-rooted hate stemmed from seokjin

he was the guy you’d share the exact same elective class with him for two straight whole semesters and you’ve been seatmates from time to time

homie took foreign language as an elective?????

the language is korean?????????????????

“wait b-but i — aren’t you — n-no but i really???”

that’s what you first sputtered to him in realization when he took his seat beside you

the two of you have only ever shown each other notes bc the other was dozing off and the occasional sharing of gummy bears that’s already pre-opened to not make any noise

but for some reason, it’s only dawned in you why seokjin’s a god in this class and he answers your questions without even looking at his notes by hALFWAY through the whole semester of foreign language

one day, u are gonna find a way to bodyslam yourself and never recover from it ever again

“mhmm. don’t sweat it, sweetheart. i personally think it’s very don quixote of me to y’know, take something as impractical and amusing as this.”

you snort at his choice of words because honestly!! you barely remember don quixote and jin’s use of it as an adjective jigs up a refresher course on your brain

who was he again??

was he the donkey

.. or are you thinking about shrek again because of your film analysis

you sWEAR there was a donkey in that story

it’s good fun to talk with jin even if he keeps sliding bourgeoisie words here and there and you’re a lil confused with all these references that he makes but that’s okay !!!

atleast even him saying it in a long-winded way that he was like someone from the merchant of somewhere, you know now that he pretty-pleased and charmed his way to the registrar for him to take korean as an elective

...

two weeks later, jin sits next to you in class

in ACTUAL non-elective, non-native language he already speaks class

now that you’re squinting a bit more, jin does look a little uh?? different

his hair that was once a hybrid of lavender and peach and pink and then blonde was now wholly black and it’s probably his original hair color because it matches with those eyebrows of his!!!

his combo of a black bomber jacket with a silk button-up underneath honestly SLAPS and it makes you forget how he used to exclusively wear only knitted shirts and argyle-patterned cardigans

you have ur jaw dropped because you totally would’ve fallen for seokjin jAW-FIRST

— if only he didn’t strike you as the brother type when he smacked the back of your head because you were falling asleep on class again and uhhh you mUst be forgetting that the two of you were sitting in front

you had no time to reevaluate whether you should develop a crush for him or not

he’s immediately slapping his hands on his knees, looking at you so intensely before pointing a finger at you with so much conviction, and then scoffing to himself

“switched majors to film. theatre was gonna be the death of me!!! y/n, if you even think about trying to switch to that cheap, amazon-ordered quill and tanning lights for stage lighting major, you’re absolutely dEAD to me-”

you’ve never had a conversation this striking nor long with jin but you genuinely have no complaints at all

seokjin talks pure shit about theatre and theatre junkies and everything in between for the WHOLE day

trails beside you for every single class you had, which was convenient because he can then sweet-talk his way again (if anybody even dared to question him) that he’s just newly-switched

sat with you for lunch and him not eating because he just needS to tell you all about it and you trying not to choke on your pasta as you try to reply to him

followed you back hOME and decided to crash the night there

yeah, that. your unfondness for theatre’s rooted on that one

uh-huh safe to say that you’ve become best friends with jin ever since that day

you’re a sponge for your friends and jin’s the closest one you have, so it was only natural that you soak up his distastes and whatnot

not to brag but aha :D

you add salt to the water while you boil pasta so u may be a little bit of a masterchef or somewhat, no big deal :D

he’s absorbed your fascination for all kinds of lights and fixtures that he has about seven different nightlights in the form of squishies or neon and everything else on his bedside table, in which he turns all of them on at night

fun fact: he’s capable of sleeping in the dark

jin’s the whole reason for your stance on this

he’s adamant about his points and you’ve graduated uni four years ago!!!

which is why you DON’T get why jin would give you a scented black envelope, with “don’t come to this” scribbled in gold at the front, carrying a single ticket to this play with a sticky note saying “don’t watch this at 7 pm, wearing your boss lady year-end award show type of clothes, sitting at the ninth row from the back and two seats from your right.”

because of course!! what the hell did he expect you to do? NOT come to this play at 7 pm wearing your boss lady year-end award show type of clothes then sitting at the ninth row from the back, two seats from the right???

OF COURSE YOU WOULD

your goal in life is to do exactly the opposite of what jin tells you. there’s literally nothing else in life you’d want to fulfill

he’s made it quite easy for you to spite him and although you wouldn’t admit it.,,.,., you may be a little petty ok

he’s the even bigger goof out of the two of you and you can never have the final say!! it’s always him and his wit and yOU being the dunce

it’s a lil sus that jin’s basically ASKING for it with his instructions but whatever

whatever it is, this is finally your chance to enact the final say and you’re gonna pull ALL the stops

all you know about theater-goers is that they dress fancy and wear these mini binoculars and that’s about it

there’s not even one film you know that you see anyone in the audience wearing a worn-in cardigan or even a puffer jacket even if the theater’s mad cold

all the people bring are scarves and shawls???? thee thinnest version of a blanket that won’t warm them up against the frigid airconditioning

that whole dress code sounds ridiculous!!! great please ring out this thousand-dollar dress im gonna wear to the theater thank u

you’re a little worried that you’re not gonna blend into the crowd, but after some digging about the invitation, formal wear is most definitely recommended

it’s an exclusive invite-only play which would be later released to the general public later on so yeah the situation dOES call for a gown thank u very much

also how could you forget that jin explicitly told you not to wear this type of attire

if you’re being humble right now, which you always normally are, even if that jUST sounded boastful talking about how you’re humble all the time —

you do look pretty breath-taking :-)

even when the doors weren’t opened and everyone’s just collectively loitering outside the hall, you’d feel glances at you

the sweet security guard did a double-take at you and mumbled a “very very nice evening to you, miss :D” instead of his normal “enjoy the show!” to the other patrons before you

you’re gonna soak all the silent compliments up and try to remember all of them before writing them on your journal later hee-hee

your midnight blue satin dress that’s floor-length and off-shoulder is dEFINITELY in your favor :D

your dress still glimmers even if the spotlight isn’t on you and you wish you weren’t shy to ask a random stranger to take a picture of you

going on self-timer isn’t ideal either when there’s like a hundred other people in the room

they probably wouldn’t even care if you took a picture of yourself!!! but in your head they probably think that you’re laughable so you’d rather not.. do that

the theater’s dark as hell if that wasn’t established

it is literally pitch black in the room and the ushers at each row holding the flashlights that are meant to guide the patrons aren’t exactly helpful

big kudos to them though,, must take a lot of self-control to not wave their lights like it was a rave :D

a flashlight tHAT bright?? whew pls is this what ships feel in the night

the last time you were in a rave, your thirty minutes of fun was cut short when seokjin immediately got hammered and wouldn’t stop throwing a fit if you didn’t drive him home that instant

his energy seemed to compelling everyone that he’s managed to somehow suck the energy out of a WHOLE rave so you took him home for everyone’s enjoyment :(((( except yours apparently

you’re trying hard to focus on the play that’s happening because for the past twenty minutes, all you’ve done is zone out randomly with ideas all of a sudden

you NEED to listen

....

uh-huh...

UH-HUH......

wait this is actually.. good

you find plays hard to follow and absolutely boring when you don’t immerse yourself in a run-down PRIOR to watching it in order to get

it’s the same analogy as reading the plot of a movie on wikipedia before watching the movie at the cinema.... absolutely useless

it sucks out the fun from something you weren’t supposed to know

watching plays is two hours of you being confused, going home to read the plot and only understand it by tHEN, and never coming to the theater again because you’d waste your money.... watching something cluelessly in the theater..... for a plot you’d grasp at home

but no

because this one

actually this one that you’re watching...

it’s not bad

it’s nice, actually.

within two minutes, you managed to grasp that it’s a story about a never-ending spring between these two lovers

there’s something about the whole setting of it actually that just sucks you in

in some plays, the outfits would seem so forced even in the given context that it reminds you of uh a particular superhero movie

and yes ur aware that stage makeup has to be enhanced so that people all the way to the back row would see

but there’s just something in this scene that’s laid out right-now that actually gets you in awe

it’s of the couple in the back of their pick-up truck and everything about it seems so natural

the background straight up looks like what it’d be if you were to go outside

the guy’s arm around her shoulder seems so natural and in nature that it doesn’t feel like a random cue in the script

the girl twinkles and it doesn’t even feel like a forced type of laugh you’d cue in attempt to warm the audience’s hearts

it’s of a plot where the the guy eventually falls out of love with the girl, while girl gets even more smitten with the guy at the same time

it’s what you take from the past ten minutes that you watch in dead silence, and you don’t even remember in the back of your head that you’re supposed to hate plays

“no way.”

you mumble in disbelief under your breath, head shaking profusely

is your mind playing tricks on you???

you’ve got too used to seokjin sitting beside you that you immediately turn to your right, whispering out your concerns

“is it just me or is she wearing a different shade of pink?”

you don’t even buffer for one second when you ask the stranger beside you

you’re so concerned that you’re looking at him intently while waiting for his answer that could either console or despair you, a random theater-goer that’s too noisy with her questions for her own good

it’s absolutely dARK as fuck in the theater but after awhile your eyes adjusted slightly

and the first thing you look at after the stage is him

him as in the dude in your right that you just asked all of a sudden

you could only see his silhouette and the faintest features of his face along with his well-dressed suit but god

... you are totally not lying if you say that even the barest silhouette of him doesn’t look handsome

you’re expecting him to tell you off for being so noisy but instead, he’s the one who takes you by surprise

“how did you notice that?”

“oh my god!” you exclaim almost too loudly that you yourself even jolts, the guy even making you duck with him slightly for a brief second, “im sO sorry!! am i accidentally spoiling it out for you?”

the guy blinks twice, lips slightly parted before shaking his head no

“no, no... this is the first screening — i mean uh, how would you know that?”

oh boy

you’re adjusting yourself on your seat, bum now warm as you try to explain and not be nervous because what if you just made a wrong assumption about this play and you’re sitting next to a goddamn tHEATRE BUFF???

“well i —uh, uhm what’s your name?” you’re flustered and the FIRST thing you ask is what was his name.,.,,

he seems equally as flustered before he adjusts his glasses, “o-oh uhm i’m namjoon...?”

alright! handsome guy is namjoon!

“you see, namjoon — okay it might just be in my head, but i tHINK it looks deeper with the light somehow. but uh...? the spotlight’s not following her and — is it just me or without the light, her sweater looks brown?”

you’re squinting and if u squint even more, maybe your contacts would just crumple by then

hold on a second

“brown, like — oh my gOD LIKE-”

namjoon puts a hand over his mouth before you could even gasp, hand reaching out for your forearm even before you manage to grasp his shoulder to take it in realization

was it under your nose the whole time??

“... fall.”

holy fucking shit

namjoon looks positively euphoric looking at your face of realization, his once-heavy chest about the whole scene becoming completely devoid of weight

“exactly!!”

his confirmation makes you inwardly squeal, grinning as you point at him and the stage back and forth

“i think this is the first play i’ve become ever interested in watching.”

okay what now

his ears perk up at that, your first sentence that you’ve said after your pink sweater that looks like spring also looks brown like fall in certain scene because of the lighting realization

“it is?”

he takes the chance to look at you as best as he could, trying to play his squinting as cool as he can

namjoon’s far sighted and the glasses he’s wearing are nOT up to date with his current grade bc he’s pretty sure his eyesight’s worsened the past month

he can’t make you out wholly, but he does know that you’re pretty

his eyes don’t linger on you because of the snacks you’re fishing from your purse while you talk that are absolutely illegal in this theater house lmao

but instead, his gaze lingers on you because you’re so pretty

the minimal light that’s bouncing off the stage is enough for him to see a faint outline of your features, highlighting your smiles just right and your dress to glint underneath

“mhmm. i actually hate plays,” suddenly, you’re not scared if namjoon happens to be some sort of theatre buff and you’re offending him because honestly, you feel at ease. “crunch?” you’re holding out the mini bar of chocolate out to him, one he politely declines to because his eyes are bulging out the next second

“you do????”

his genuine reaction indulges you, making you grin ultimately that you put off eating snacks for now to focus on him

“yeah! this is my hate outfit :D”

namjoon giggles as if it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard

you automatically scoot closer because this time, it’s yOUR turn to shush him

this is totally for just the reason of talking more discreetly and not distracting anyone and is totally not an excuse to be closer to the next guy and touch shoulders with him then get a whiff of cologne because it’s rare for a guy to be handsome and aLSO smell good

your eyes get used to the darkness and eventually, you could make out features of namjoon beside you

he has the prettiest eyes you’ve ever seen

and the way he looks at you makes you feel safe and even your height difference is visible with how probably lonG his torso is compared to yours, his gaze doesn’t make you feel small

namjoon’s still (unsurprisingly) far-sighted and ur so close that he’s a lil cross-eyed

fuck it he’s gonna go to ophthalmologist FIRST thing in the morning tomorrow

“then why are you here?”

“my friend seokjin,” you lean back upon realizing the original reason why you’re here, the situation being so ironic that you puff out a smile

your friend’s named seokjin?

cool :D kim seokjin is namjoon’s of his favorite directors eVER!!

second best for him actually though.,., no one could quite compare to his first

your explanation makes him cackle several times, a swell of pride recounting why you hate (it’ll be past tense probably after this one) theatre

“what about you?”

you turn the question to him, making his dimples disappear effectively that you think you’ve just spooked him

“i uh, well i always wanted to see a story that went like this, so i’m here.”

“you’re a critic? oh god. please don’t tell me you heard all my mumbles.”

no this is even WORSE

namjoon’s not a theatre buff

HE’S A CRITIC????????????

god im coming up

“don’t worry, i also think that the drapings must probably be dirty.”

he breaks out into a smile recounting how you were talking to yourself earlier, a snort escaping him involuntarily

“RIGHT??? it’s like how do you even clean them?? do they fit in washing machines or-”

my god he’s such a nice guy!!!

in fact, he’s everything you want in a guy

you’ve went through atleast twelve facets of emotions for the past hour and you’re not even dating!!!!!!!

“my thoughts exactly!! and if it’s by hand, how do you even scrub the entirety of it?? or wring the water out??”

namjoon KNOWS exactly what’s up :’)

“is there even a clothesline that’d bEAR the weight??”

the two of you are so happy that you just look at each other laughing, a moment in time before namjoon nudges you to lean back because the ending’s happening

you don’t even question him how he’d know that it’s the ending and not just another opening to a new scene, just listening to him

you’re so happy

the play made you happy but namjoon made you even happier :-)

“if you are a critic, you should probably open up your review with this chatty play-hating girl beside you, then at the end, close it off with how she loves it.”

it’s the parting conversation as you realize and holy fuck you are nOT ready for it

you r gonna drag this out for as long as you could <3

......

and namjoon wants in too <3

“noted. if i was a playwright, i’d even make you the lead. which detail should i include? offering me wrapper-covered rice crispy snacks, or asking how you’d watch it while going thru the bathroom?”

this feels so natural

as natural as the couple in the play you’ve just finished watching :))

“you’re hilarious,” you’re not even the slightest bit annoyed and your restrained smile tells him all about it

yea you may have brought in snacks illegally but you aRE gathering your trash up as you’re a decent human being

namjoon wishes you’d pick up after yourself slowly, standing up from his seat as he has the plan of picking up trash that isn’t even his

“what name should i put then?”

you’re silent and oh god he thinks you found his company stupid and would definitely not give him your name

you’re not ignoring him though!!!

his words are still stuck in your head, realizing it lately with his “which detail should i include?”

“me wanting to turn this into a film, actually.”

you test the words out on your tongue, nodding to yourself after a few seconds that you seem so sure of it

“yeah. i wanna make it into a film.”

the lights turn on after being dim for so long, namjoon’s eyes going wide trying to digest what you’ve just said

“w-what?

.....

no fucking way

HOLY FUCKING SHIT SWFRWFBWRHGBRBVWRV SWBHJSDB SHJAVBHGJDS BWHRGHBSVWBGRH

namjoon’s malfunctioning as he’s looking at you from eye to eye, bottom lip trembling while he’s so keen at pointing at you

“y-you’re miss y/n!!”

....

right

oH RIGHT

he’s a fan of yours??

namjoon’s fanning his face because he’s about to literally burst into tears

how could he nOT???

how could he not be emotional when all along, he’s been talking to his number one favorite director????

you and your films are the absolute gems of his life namjoon’s not even kidding

your films were world-renowned for being so natural and sentimental without loading too much into it!!!! you’re known for being so humble through the multiple back-to-back awards and praise you get!!!!

he cannot calm the fUCK down when you’re rubbing circles on his back

“you w-want to turn my play into a film?”

oh my gOD

you’re fumbling for the envelope and it’s only nOW that you realize that it’s not from seokjin in the first place

spring day a play by kim namjoon an invite for director y/n y/l/n

“it’s you!!!!”

“no it’s YOU!!”

jin’s plan worked alright :D

he’s just FOUR rows behind you lmao

it was just two weeks ago when yoongi, the executive producer of his film that he was directing, let it slip that he was co-financing a play

he met yoongi some semesters later after he became close with you, and he’s aLSO converted yoongi into hating theatre then he fit right in to your little posse of theatre kid-hating film students

that gave jin the laugh of his laugh and yoongi was not joking at all

“no, no. i’m telling you man. it’s different! i even have the script that i’ll let you read.”

and holy shit it IS different

if you see a couple tears on the last seven pages of yoongi’s copy of spring day’s script then mind yo oWN fucking business

then two weeks later, here he is :D

jin managed to also convert you to love theatre even IF it is namjoon’s play that did all the work

( also coincidentally found you a future boyfriend because he’s tired of seeing you alone and the closest you’d get to having someone is projecting your yearning into writing the scripts for the films you’d make )

he’s also secretly co-financed the whole play along with yoongi and he’ll drop that bomb later on lmao

“and that must mean i looked like a total FOOL beside you oh my god im so sorry!!”

namjoon panics at that, about to cry when another realization hits him when he’s about to put his head on his hands

“then that means the friend who gave you the ticket was-”

SEOKJIN VBFHSBVHSFBVSFHDVBSJFV SFJVJSFVSJVSSV SSV V FS FSV SFBVRBVRSVSWVGU

he cries to your shoulder and you never expected to be hugging and consoling someone you’ve just met two hours ago, a more than fond smile on your face he takes advantage of when he sneaks in the chance to ask you

“do you mean that?”

“now why would i lie to the playwright who’s been listening to me talk shit, then theorizing, then crying for the past hour?”

it’s true though

namjoon’s seen it all

he’s still handsome as ever even when he sniffles, his dimples on display when you return his question

“now did you mean it? writing me into your play?”

why are you even ASKING

he’s the biggest fan of u

namjoon’s made notes of your work, dedicated scripts to your movies, and he’s thinking about how it’s not yet hitting you how your whole epiphany about the pink sweater turning brown on his play,,, was entirely inspired from you and your affinity for lighting in your films

he thinks it’s still a little early to kiss you on the cheek even if you’ve already hugged, instead settling on pinching your cheek with satisfaction present in all corners

“you’ve always been my muse.”

#feedback pls and thank you :D I WAS SCREAMING THE WHOLE TIME I HAVE A TEST TOMORROW I NEED TO SLEEP #namjoon #kim namjoon #namjoon imagine #namjoon imagines #namjoon oneshot #namjoon oneshots #namjoon x y/n #namjoon x reader #namjoon fluff #namjoon au #namjoon fluff imagine #namjoon fluff imagines #namjoon fic #namjoon fics #namjoon fic recs #namjoon scenario #bts namjoon imagine

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randomestfandoms-ocs · 4 years

Note

odd ship asks for aurora?

this under a cut for length!

SFW

1. Who cooks?

Aurora cooks more often, but Sebastian will sometimes surprise her if she’s had a particularly bad day! Cooking is something that Aurora generally finds really relaxing which is why she does it more, but if she doesn’t have the time or energy (mental or physical) then Sebastian will!

3. Who fixes the vehicle after a breakdown?

If it’s simple enough, Aurora, but anything big and they need a tow truck!

5. Who buys the groceries?

Aurora!

7. Would they go to the beach?

Yes! Anytime they can tbh!

9. Is someone multilingual? Do they try to teach another language to the other? How does it go?

Both of them are multilingual! They both speak French! Aurora speaks a few other languages too – she tries to teach Sebastian spanish but Sebastian cannot focus when she speaks another language lmao (it is a kink and Aurora will not hesitate to take advantage of it)

11. Baths or showers? Together or separate? Any bubbles or bubble fights?

They’re typically shower people but Sebastian takes ice baths for lacrosse and Aurora tries to have one nice bath a week just to relax (not when she’s at Dalton tho lmao cause they only have showers there). They generally shower separately (dorm showers and limited time) but when they’re older they definitely like to have baths together and Aurora starts bubble fights by giving Sebastian bubble beards lmao

13. Who stays up late? Who sleeps the most? Does the other have to force them to sleep/wake up?

They’re both night owls but Aurora just like, doesn’t sleep most of the time so Sebastian frequently has to drag her to bed! The struggle of getting Aurora to sleep is one that the Warblers are all too familiar with haha

15. Vacation ideas: who decides them? Where would they go, if anywhere?

okay so most of their vacations are done with the whole inner circle warbler group and they have a specific collection of vacation destinations that they rotate to (where their parents all have various vacation homes lmao). Every christmas is spent at the Anderson house in the cayman islands my godfamily lives there so i used to spend christmases there i miss it and then other vacations are rotated! When they’re older their schedules get a bit more flexible so if Aurora has time between broadway runs then Sebastian will take time off for non-warbler vacations, in which case they decide together!

NSFW

1. How often do they have sex, if at all?

Okay so the first time they have sex is in their senior year and at first they don’t have sex often on account of sharing a wall with Nick and Jeff (and also Aurora still has some trauma and also they just have other things to do with their lives lmao) – after graduation it becomes a bit more frequent but given that they still live with Blaine, Sam, Nick, and Jeff, privacy is a rare thing haha

3. Any kinks they clash on?

Hm, not off the top of my head! Both of them are pretty willing to try things, and tend to have the same hard nos!

5. Favourite positions?

Generally they like to keep it simple. Pretty much anything where they can look at each other is good! Aurora also likes when Sebastian picks her up and Sebastian likes cowgirl, but the priority is looking at each other – if Sebastian is behind Aurora when there’s any penetration involved, she’s almost guaranteed to have a panic attack

9. Quickest turn ons? Immediate turn offs?

Aurora: turn ons: sebastian being a cocky bitch lmao, sebastian picking her up, sebastian singing, when he’s just finished any sort of competition (glee or lacrosse) and is clearly still running on that adrenaline, when he tries and fails to be smooth, domestic sebastian, sebastian shirtless turn offs: silence, penetration from behind, the chance of being seen

Sebastian: turn ons: aurora speaking other languages, aurora kissing his jaw, aurora dancing, aurora snapping at people who treat her badly, aurora wearing his clothes, when she sits on his lap and kisses his jaw, tbh just her entire existence is a turn on lmao turn offs: being able to hear other people (esp in Dalton, if he can hear Nick and Jeff in their dorm or anyone in the hallway it’s a no go), anytime it’s clear that Aurora is trying to prove something to herself (usually pushing past her comfort zone bc she’s trying to force herself to get over her trauma)

11. Favourite romantic gestures during sex/orgasm?

They kiss a lot during sex – some making out but also a lot of just pressing kisses literally anywhere they can reach. Aurora dies a little (in a good way) whenever Sebastian calls her baby – he really only ever does that during sex and it makes her heart go “!!!”. Aurora will sometimes start saying “I love you” in different languages and sometimes they slip into soft french without realizing it bc they’re idiots and i love them. Aurora will also sometimes start talking about totally unrelated things and while most people might be offended that her attention isn’t fully on what’s going on, Sebastian loves it because she’s a lot less guarded than usual! Things that she would normally brush off as not being a big deal (good exciting things and also bad/sad/painful things) come up a lot, especially in the foreplay period, and it warms his heart to know that she feels safe and relaxed enough to open up

13. Who’s loud? Who’s quiet? Does one try to make the other louder/quieter? How?

Aurora is pretty quiet, aside from going on her random tangents and her little “I love yous” whereas Sebastian talks a lot. Sometimes it’s dirty talk and sometimes it’s just soft little things, but a lot of it is also just him telling her what he’s going to do so that she isn’t caught off guard and has the chance to stop him if she doesn’t like/want something. He does try to encourage her to be louder, because he wants to know how she feels about things, and usually he’ll just start asking “do you like that?” or “how does it feel?” or that sort of thing! When she’s prompted, she does talk, she just never starts it

15. Open or closed relationship? Do they sometimes share?

Closed, no sharing! They do technically have a list of free passes but that’s really only because early on in their relationship the NDs kept telling her that Sebastian would cheat on her with Blaine if he had the chance so this happened:

A: “hey if you want to sleep with Blaine you can, just don’t dump me and don’t like”

S: “wait what? where did that come from?”

A: “spite, mostly”

S: “fair enough, but then you need a pass too – how about Sam?”

A: “he’s pretty, sounds good to me”

and then fast forward to the next day and kurt once again is going on about how sebastian is a slut who wants to sleep with blaine and aurora is just like “lmao yeah that’s his free pass dude get with the program”

but if given the opportunity neither of them would want to sleep with someone else

Send me numbers and ships!

#ask #answered #farklelucas #aurora anderson #about aurora a #sebora #aurora x sebastian #ship: please remind me who i really am

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flechxtte · 5 years

Text

ok so. years ago, i used to do those. number replacement memes where you choose so many characters and assign them a number and then go and answer a couple questions about the characters according to their numbers. i did a handful of these with kfp characters back at my old job during my breaks or when i had just. Free Time (since i was on the computer all day to do my job anyway)

i haven’t actually finished any of them but i was reading through some of the old ones and there’s some little Gems tucked away in them, so i thought i’d share them shrugs

warnings for. Crack tbh and one horny joke lies down

okay and before i start this off i want to REASSURE YOU ALL these were all entirely random and i, in no way, peeked at the questions beforehand and chose the characters’ numbers based on that, so with that in mind, these first ones are pretty frickn amazing lmao

[1] (Tigress) and [4] (Po) go out for a night on the town (this can be a date, a “girl’s night out,” or what-have-you). Where do they go?

In a follow up to the previous question, at whatever the most awkward/compromising location on that list is, they run into [3] (Mr. Ping). What happens?

[3] (Mr. Ping) is kidnapped. What do [4] (Po) and [7] (Li Shan) do about it (e.g. work together to rescue him/her, work separately and undermine each other’s efforts, ignore the situation completely)?

i never did ‘answer’ these three but just the questions themselves i thought were hilarious and Weirdly IC ahaa

[5] (Shen), [1] (Tigress), and [7] (Li Shan) stay at a hotel. Unfortunately, they get stuck with a room with only two beds and no couch. How do they resolve this?

shen: /immediately finds himself locked out of the room

VIII wants to buy a car but can't decide who offers a better bargain. Should (s)he buy from II or XI?

(Tai Lung, Shifu, Monkey)

tai lung: master, i need a car. monkey has one to sell and says it's a good car-- shifu: absolutely not

[1] (Tigress), [2] (Shen), and [6] (Viper) all have a crush on [4] (Tai Lung).

Okay, Tigress and Viper isn't completely out there I mean he is a very muscular, fit guy but then there's. SHEN.

Shen: /aBSOLUTE HATRED AT HIMSELF FOR THIS Tai Lung: /walks by TigressViper: /vague interest but he's also kind of a jerk so eh it fades Shen: /desperately avoiding fanning himself bc the 'arrogant jerk' thing is just more of a turn-on gO AWAY ALREADY Tai Lung: /slows down just to spite him B] Shen: /anGRY SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED NOISES

so it's less of a crush and more of a hormonal crash good on you shen

[8] (Soothsayer) is working as a waiter/waitress and just spilt coffee over [2] (Shen).

...don't lie soothsayer you did that on purpose

Shen: /crumpled in pain why Soothsayer: I was hoping it'd make your robes taste better- what do you think? It was an accident! /lays a cold compress on him Shen: /wheezes Don't believe you...

[10] (Monkey) is hitchhiking by a road until [5] (Crane) accompanied by [1] (Tigress) drive by, will they pick him/her up, or will 10 steal their car and leave them stranded instead?

CraneTigress: /trudging down the road in the rain Tigress: ...I told you he would do it. Crane: I was just trying to have a little faith in a friend. Is that so wrong?

[6] (Viper) and [8] (Soothsayer) have the same ticket for a seat at a football game, what do they do about it and who gets the seat?

soothsayer: /is a good chair viper: /is a pretty good hat

[3] (Mr. Ping) gets to choose anyone from 1 to 10 to dance with at the prom, who would it be and what would their and everyone else’s reaction be?

Mr. Ping: /chooses Po obvs Po: ^7^;;; Shen: /some mean remark about Po having to dance with his dad like a geek Soothsayer: B\ /forces Shen to dance with her Shen and his big mouth: >B|

[5] (Tai Lung), [1] (Crane), and [7] (Tigress) stay at a hotel. Unfortunately, they get stuck with a room with only two beds and no couch. How do they resolve this?

tai lung/tigress: /assume very serious fighting stances and trade pre-battle banter crane: ...guys i sleep standing did u forget

#;firecrackers #long post

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bigskydreaming · 6 years

Text

So random stuff about me and my acting career, apropos of nothing but being bored and having a spare moment. Putting it under a cut, not because it’s super personal or I have a problem with reblogs or anything in this instance, it’s just long and rambly and only of interest if you’re like....actually interested. Idk.

So I was just talking about memory, and I’m weird because in most instances, I actually have a really freaky good memory. It’s not photographic, but it’s still damn good. I can memorize a script fast enough that it gives most of my other actor friends envy, I could draw a floorplan of like, every house I lived in as a kid, but the thing is it’s not automatic. I have to like....make a mental note to lock something in as worth hanging on to. Its not like I look at a page and I have it memorized, but I look at a page and make a mental note like I’m taking a snapshot of it, and then its locked in.

But bottom line....I have a really really good memory for anything I care about to some degree, for whatever reason I care about it, whether it’s an important life event or a scene by scene breakdown of a fave fanfic I read twenty years ago in high school. Flip side tho....I have an absolutely TERRIBLE memory for anything that doesn’t particularly matter to me and I was never paying that much attention to begin with.

Now, you would think this would work out in my favor overall, as an actor, right? Like I said, I can memorize scripts really quickly and hold onto them for as long as I need to, I never forget a face if it’s someone I like or have a good interaction with, stuff like that.

Buuuuuut....problem is.....I’m also a jaded cynical asshole who super doesn’t give a shit about a lot of key things that most everyone else in the entertainment industry assumes everyone cares about as much as them. Like....say, how famous a person is, or how popular a show or movie is.

I could tell you every little detail I learned in conversation with a super obscure actor I worked with once eight years ago that’s only recently achieved a level of fame or celebrity if that actor was someone I enjoyed working with as a person. But if say, for instance, purely speaking hypothetically, if an actor were someone that I decided I didn’t give a shit about five seconds into our interaction because he came across as Generic Hollywood Douchebag #27? And if that actor was mostly in shows that aren’t to my personal tastes and so aren’t really on my radar, it doesn’t matter how big or famous that actor is, or even if I’ve literally met them three different times on three different projects and been personally introduced to them because I had actual lines with them.....hypothetically I would probably reintroduce myself to them each time as though it were the first time we’d ever met, even though I’m the nameless nobody and they’re the big star, because I simply did not give enough of a shit about them to lock in our previous interactions.

Now, I’m not saying that this scenario has happened, I’m just saying that it hasn’t....not happened.

And I’ve definitely never been in the super awkward position of only realizing halfway into a three week shoot with a director that the kinda weird random comments the director keeps making to me have to do with the fact that he actually directed me in a commercial years earlier and has been assuming this whole time that I definitely remembered working with him before, whoops.

But yeah, point is, I have a lot of cool or interesting or funny stories from working in Hollywood for like...ten years now, I think? Idk. But they’re all from like...good days on set on projects I enjoyed working with people I liked. I’ve had just as many projects where I literally just showed up for the paycheck, worked with people I didn’t err...particularly care for, and basically just....forgot everything about the job and the experience the minute I walked off set because who needs that shit, you know? Like I mean, yes, I’m petty and spiteful and joke about this all the time, but in reality, I don’t ACTUALLY get super annoyed over every single negative interaction I ever have, I just exaggerate this aspect of me for shits and giggles on tumblr because I’m unneccessarily melodramatic. When it comes to my day to day job, aka working on set on various projects, its just not worth the mental energy to get worked up over a lot of the shit I deal with on a daily basis because like, Ego is EVERYWHERE in Hollywood, and even I do not have the time or energy to be annoyed every time I have to work with a patronizing asshole. So mostly, I just tend to...forget about them. Unless they REALLY get under my skin.

Anyway, this leads to a very weird dichotomy when it comes to talking about my actual career and experiences as an actor. I can totally be guilty of name-dropping and being all oh I know so and so or I worked on this or that, but its not really because I think its super impressive because they’re so famous or whatever. The novelty of working with famous people wears off pretty quick, and like...no matter how big the person you’re working with today is, its not like there isn’t always someone bigger, you know? So when I name drop, it tends to be because I just really like someone as a person or just had a really good time working with them or working on a particular shoot. But then again, flip side.....try and talk to me about a job I didn’t care about, I mean, not a job I HATED but a job I just....wasn’t invested in, just was there for the paycheck, and like....you’ll get a blank stare 99% of the time.

So, I technically remain pseudo anonymous for the time being on tumblr, not wanting to publicly link this URL to my like....work stuff, that’s because most of you have seen me get enough anon crap from people worked up about fandom drama, that its not worth it to me to risk giving them potential ammunition like that. Considering I.....umm, absolutely have talked a LOT of shit about a couple of movies and shows and actors and directors that I have worked on or with personally because I have no filter lmao.

(And yes, Kalen is my real name and ppl have found my twitter and writing stuff because of it BUT I use a different name for my SAG name so like, that’s not what I’m on IMDB and stuff as). But because I have no filter and am one of the least subtle people in existence, I actually do end up saying a lot of stuff I probably shouldn’t if I REALLY wanted to remain totally anonymous, because a few people have absolutely figured out stuff I’ve been in and even tracked me down based on stuff I’ve mentioned over the years, lol whoops. And its not really that big a deal because I do have enough common sense....well no, okay let’s put it this way, I do have a firm enough system of prioritizing things for myself that anything I do say out loud, online or in public, is something that I would and have stood by even if it ends up getting me in trouble. Like, its not end of the world type secrecy, its more just....eh, I don’t really want to deal with unnecessary career drama if I don’t have to, so I try to be vague about stuff when I remember to, but I’m not like....obsessively invested in it. If that makes sense?

But the funny thing is, even with friends who do know my real name and I talk to about actual jobs I’ve had, like....half the time I can’t even tell them where to find me, because I genuinely don’t even remember a ton of the stuff I’ve actually been in. I could literally still recite my lines from a role, because that’s important info I needed to get paid for the job and thus I retain it....but in instances where it was just one or two fairly generic scenes without a context clue or me using names to signify who I might be talking to or what show or movie it might be from....I literally do not remember what the actual role itself was, lmao.

Like, I’m not even exaggerating for effect even slightly, this is how weird my brain is. I get residual checks for work I’ve done where I have to like....go hunt down my voucher or contract that matches the dates on the check to figure out what project it was from and try and remember it. Or go through my phone or facebook based off the dates to try and see if I talked to anyone about it that can jog my memory. Because what’s worse is a lot of stuff in Hollywood that isn’t like, a long running TV show, will use a pre-production name or even just go by ‘Untitled (Director’s Name) Project’, so I get a check with the official name of the project on it, and my dumb ass never paid attention to it after I was done working on it so never actually connected the dots.

LOL, I’ve had people I know come to me and be like, hey, were you on this episode of Criminal Minds in Season (I don’t even remember, I forgot AGAIN, jesus)....and I’m like....uh, I don’t think so? Because I hate Criminal Minds but I actually do watch it on Netflix, but in the background of stuff when I’m working on writing or graphic design stuff from home, and so I’m like, uh, I think I would remember if I’d ever worked on Criminal Minds or at least noticed....and then they’re all, no, I swear, that’s you, and they told me the episode number and I looked it up on Netflix and fast forwarded to the time stamp they gave me and I was like....ohhhhhhh, right, yeah that is me. Wait, I remember that shoot, that was Criminal Minds???? Huh. I had no idea.

I’m not even kidding. This is a real, actual conversation I’ve had with a college friend on facebook.

But yeah, it literally happens all the time to me. People will ask me “so what would I have seen you in” and half the time I legit have to tell them “apparently, the stuff you’re most likely to have seen me in, I completely have no idea where to find it.” Because most of the jobs I’ve had that I really enjoyed and remember fondly were for like, indie movies, or pilots that never got picked up, or this was this car commercial I did that only ever aired in European markets, and shit like that. And IMDB isn’t really much of a help because most actors kinda have to manage their own IMDB pages....to get officially credited via SAG, through IMDB Pro and stuff, either you or your agent or manager have to go through the production itself to get confirmation, and it’s a whole hassle and like.....you all know I’m notoriously ADHD right? LOL.

And I’ve never really had a consistent agent or manager for longer than a couple months, because the level that I’m at career wise, I’ve honestly always done better getting my own work than getting it through agents sending me on auditions. I’ve done two big budget pilots for primetime networks and both of them I got cast because the casting director called me in directly because she remembered me from these three episodes I did on a soap opera eight years ago, random stuff like that and personal networking, that’s how I’ve landed most of my jobs. But that means I’m the only one responsible for maintaining my IMDB page, which given the hoops you have to jump through to get properly credited in a lot of cases, means mine is missing like...a lot. (Also I haaaaate watching myself act on camera, because I’m a perfectionist and super self-critical, so I never seek out my own stuff to watch anyway, I show up, I do the job, I’m done with it, on to the next).

But another example, there’s a pretty popular show that ran on ABC for multiple seasons and is one of the more prominent places where people have seen me and recognized me in something, because like, it’s a one scene role but it’s definitely and clearly me. And so I went to IMDB to check if I was credited for it, because sometimes production does it itself and I don’t always have to do it personally, only....the role is credited....but to some random guy who most definitely is not me. I have no idea who this guy is, I don’t even remember seeing him on that shoot and yes it’s one i actually remember well lol, but from his page it looks like he’s basically a career extra who gets production to credit him when he has significant face time or a nonverbal and nameless but still relevant role - they do that sometimes, so its worth a shot I guess - but anyway, he somehow managed to get credited with my role either by accident or design and I’ve literally been trying for years to get that changed, but since production wrapped years ago it’s a pain hunting the right people down and every time I try and go hey I should finally take care of this, I end up just getting annoyed and go fuck it and give up lmao.

So random funny story to wrap this up........like....six or seven years ago I went down to San Diego to visit my little sister, she’s four years younger than me and so had just graduated college I think. And so I was there for a few days and at one point she wanted to go see this new summer movie that had just come out with Hayden Panettiere in it, that girl from Heroes, though its some other show that my sister was a fan of hers from. I did some stunt work on Heroes once though so that’s what I tend to remember her from, even though I’ve actually worked on a few different things she’s been on.

So anyway, my sister and I are sitting in the middle of the theater watching this movie I’ve never heard of or seen any previews for.....it was one of those generic summer high school/college rom-coms that randomly get sprinkled in amidst summer blockbusters some years. And I’m bored and barely paying attention because I looked up the synopsis before we left and it didn’t grab me and I wasn’t big on any of the cast, so I’m mostly just there to humor my sister because she’s that sibling that every family has where all other siblings fear them. And I’m not like, snoozing or anything, but nothing about the movie is holding my interest so its one of those just kinda...glazed eyes, killing time kinda experiences, and also, parts of it feel very familiar and I’m like....have I seen this before or is it just really really formulaic?

And then my sister full on hits me in the shoulder and hisses “You didn’t tell me you were IN this!” And I’m like, okay first, OW, second....I’m not, I think I would know? And she’s looking at me like I’m the biggest idiot in the world and then gestures super obnoxiously and dramatically (it runs in the family) at the screen and people are starting to look at us, so I’m like I’m looking, jeez, chill....and then its like...huh. Cuz sure enough, there I am. Right in the middle of this big house party scene. That’s definitely me, and suddenly I’m like.....thaaaaaaaaaaaaaat’s why I feel like I’ve seen this movie before, I’m remembering the sceeeeeenes I was on set for. Ugh, no wonder I forgot about it, now I’m remembering we shot this one scene right here like 22 times, we spent three fucking days on it, it was annoying as hell.

And my sister’s still looking at me accusingly, like I’ve committed some mortal sin by not alerting her in advance to my presence, or more likely, not having called her to give her every single detail of my experience on a movie she was interested in, and I’m like....what do you want me to say? I didn’t know I was in this!

How do you NOT know you’re in a movie, she wants to know, and we’re whisper fighting in the middle of the theater but luckily nobody seems too mad, the ppl around us look kinda amused actually because they’ve recognized the me next to them as the me on the screen and have overhead enough to get the gist (my sister is a very loud whisperer), and anyway I’m like, I knew I was in A movie, I just didn’t know it was THIS movie, it was one of those Untitled projects I’m pretty sure. I never knew what they ended up calling it!

And she’s like, and you never tried to find out what it was ultimately called or when it would come out at least? Which....no, why would I? It’s a terrible movie, I have zero interest in it.

Finally she’s like ugh, whatever, I still don’t get how you didn’t at least think ‘hey, I was in something with Hayden Panettiere recently, maybe its this’ when I was talking about her being in it. You had to at least know she was in it, you’re standing like....five feet away from her!

And I think I just shrugged at that point, because it was like, yeah, I knew it was her, but I’ve been that close to her a bunch of times, so what? She’s okay I guess but she’s not that great, I didn’t pay that much attention lol. Besides this was actually like a year ago I’m pretty sure, I’ve actually worked on the same set as her like twice since then I think, so.....idk. I probably just thought this was Heroes again? Whatever, it all blurs together and the director was super obnoxious, I remember now. I spent the whole shoot trying to astral project away from there.

I think that was the point where she just gave up on me and idk, knowing her she probably did a super dramatic hair toss and then tried to ignore me for the rest of the movie. Most likely while internally ranting about what a waste it is having an actor brother who doesn’t even care enough to let you know when he’s on set with her like....multiple times. To which I probably would’ve replied I can’t possibly be expected to keep up with her current faves, she changes celeb idols like, as often as she changes her hair color, which is a LOT. Ahem. Anyway. At one point my scene came on where I had actual lines, and I started mouthing them along with the me on screen, which I do admit in hindsight, was probably a Dick Older Brother move on my part, but whatever, she was being totally unreasonable about the whole thing, but then she gave me a Devil Glare and was like “I thought you didn’t remember being in this movie,” and I gave into the compulsion to just go full on Dick Older Brother and was like “I said I didn’t remember the MOVIE, of course I remember my LINES, I’m a professional, Ashley, god”.

Yeah. She was irritated about that for awhile. Oh well. Siblings. What can you do, y’know?

But moral of the story - you’d think, after all that, I’d at least always remember that movie after that happened.

I do not.

I think I’ve told this story to a bunch of people over the years, and every single time they ask me, so what was the movie, I wanna check it out. And to this day, I STILL can not for the life of me remember the fucking title of that movie or even like, what my character’s name was, and I just...never care enough to go try and hunt it down and figure it out.

What’s really bad, is I know for a FACT that multiple people I’ve told this story to have then gone on to hunt it down from Panettiere’s IMDB page on their own, and came back to me like ‘was it this one’ and I’m always like YES! THAT’S IT!

.....two minutes later, I have completely fucking forgotten the name of the movie again.

I SWEAR TO GOD I’M NOT EVEN JOKING. This is just....my brain.

#kalen acts sometimes

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