#she was never meant to become that way she was just a girlie | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

delulujuls · 3 months

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i'd give you the whole world if i only knew its price | ls18

am i a lance's girlie? no. am i becoming a lance's girlie? dont look at me

he seems so sweet idk why people hate on him

summary: lance's love language is giving gifts and when it came to giving something in return he'll accept only one way

warnings: none

pairing: fem!bffreader x lance stroll

The little girl sat on the curb, tears streaming down her rosy, tear-stained cheeks. In her tiny hands, she held her shattered helmet, unfit for further use. The girl wasn't crying because her father had scolded her for accidentally damaging the helmet. Instead, it was because, until she could find a replacement, she wouldn't be able to race with the other kids. That is, if there were any funds available for a new one.

Seeing the seven-year-old in tears, a slightly older boy, aware of the reason behind her distress, approached her with his newly purchased helmet in hand, crouching down in front of her.

"Here, you can have mine."

The girl stopped sobbing as he sat beside her, handing her the helmet, which she hesitantly accepted.

"I can't take it, my dad doesn't have any money left."

"You can take it, I always have two helmets with me."

The boy smiled at her, but uncertainty still lingered on her face. He glanced toward his father, who stood under one of the tents, observing the children a few meters away. Seeing the tearful face of the girl and the joyful expression on his son's face, he also smiled slightly and nodded.

"See?" he said, squeezing her hands that held the helmet. "My dad agreed. You can take it as a gift."

"Really?"

While her face was still wet from tears, her eyes no longer radiated sadness. Looking into the brown eyes of the boy, he nodded and he stood up, extending his hand.

"By the way, I'm Lance. Now, come on, it's about to start!"

"Please, Y/N, don't be like that."

The boy slumped onto the hotel bed, closely watching the girl's face on his phone screen.

"I'm sorry, Lance, but I can't."

She replied, her phone propped up against a coffee mug, engrossed in browsing job listings on her laptop.

"Why can't you just take it as a gift?"

Y/N scoffed and shook her head.

"Every month you give me some gift, Lance. Last month, as a 'gift,' you bought me a Birkin bag, and I don't even want to know how much it cost."

"You said your bag was falling apart, I wanted to make you happy."

She sighed and shifted her gaze to her phone. Lance looked at her attentively with his puppy eyes, visibly concerned. He wasn't seeing any problem here.

"The bag is gorgeous, and you have no idea how much joy you brought me," she said with grattitude in her voice. "But even a simple Target bag would make me happy, you know?"

"Yeah, probably. But this one is okay too, right?"

She laughed and shook her head.

"It's beautiful. Thank you very much."

Hearing her words, Lance breathed a sigh of relief. Seeing her smile, he did the same.

"So, if you want to repay me, let me fly you to Bahrain."

She lowered her gaze, and the smile faded from her face. Barely scraping by on bills and struggling to find a new job, spending her remaining money on plane tickets was the last thing on her mind. Even if, it could cover just one ticket.

"I can't afford to visit you, Lance."

"That's why let me take care of it. We haven't seen each other for so long, and I want to finally see you and start this season together," he said, looking at her worried face. Money meant nothing to him; he could send a private jet to pick her up, just to have her with him. "Please, Y/N."

She sighed and shook her head.

"I feel so embarrassed. I'll never be able to repay you for all of this."

"So, is it a yes? Can I book the tickets?"

He asked, hope in his voice, and a smile slowly crept back onto his face.

"Fine, but no more gifts this month, okay?"

"I'll try to meet that condition."

Lance and Y/N had been friends since the day he noticed her crying next to the carting track, holding her damaged helmet. They remained friends through all the years of go-karting, and their friendship persisted even when Y/N had to give up racing due to financial reasons.

At first, though she shudders at the thought even now, she hated Lance with every fiber of her being. It wasn't him she despised, but the obscene amounts of money his father had, providing him with everything he could dream of. Y/N was aware that Lance had both many fans and critics, so every time she came across unfavorable comments about him online, she felt embarrassed. After all, she used to cry and curse him every night, even though deep down, she didn't hate him; she just disliked the situation he was in, which she was not allowed to have.

Lance himself knew that without money, he would never have entered the serious world of motorsport. Numerous training sessions, expensive lessons, academy tests – Lance knew that money secured his current position, but talent couldn't be bought. He knew he could drive, and even the people who hated him online knew it too, disliking him simply because he succeeded. Being in Formula 1 cost the Canadian a lot, as he constantly felt like he didn't belong there. Even in the paddock, despite rarely facing personal comments, he knew many saw him as the boy with his daddy's big money. Lance often felt lonely, so he deeply appreciated every moment he could spend with Y/N. No one was as important to him as she was.

However, Y/N focused on being an ordinary teenager after giving up her motorsport career. She finished high school, got into college, even found a job and rented an apartment. Although her life didn't unfold exactly as she wanted, she stayed connected to motorsport through Lance, whom she supported as much as she could. Now things were getting complicated again as the season was about to begin, meaning she could only cheer for him from her couch. But for Lance, there were no such limitations. If he could solve a problem with money, he would. Furthermore, Lance found immense joy in showering Y/N with various gifts. Giving her presents was his love language, something that Y/N had no clue about.

"There she is."

Lance smiled at the sight of his friend, who stepped out of the taxi in front of one of the Bahrain hotels. She returned the smile, hugging him.

"I was talking about the bag, but it's nice to see you too," he teased, pointing to the Birkin she was holding, prompting her to playfully nudge him. Lance chuckled and embraced her, taking her suitcase and leading her inside the hotel.

"I hope the flight was okay and you're full of energy because we're going to a team dinner tonight."

"So, basically your dad is inviting us to dinner?"

She asked jokingly, looking at him as they entered the elevator.

"Technically, yes, my dad is inviting us to dinner."

Y/N laughed, "Well, Lawrence Stroll can't be refused."

Shortly afterward, they were on the right floor where both of them had their rooms. Lance handed her the key card and when she entered her room, she noticed a bouquet of roses and a small package on the bed.

"Lance..."

Turning around, she saw him biting his lip, trying to hide his smile.

"Yes, yes, I know, we had a deal. But these roses were practically free and the little gift next to it is, let's say, a shared one."

He explained, putting aside her suitcase. She also placed her bag down and approached the bed, picking up the bouquet of white roses. She smelled one and smiled, feeling their pleasant fragrance. Lance smiled too.

"You're impossible, you know that?"

"Open the gift."

He encouraged her, leaning against the wall.

She smelled the flowers once more and put them aside, taking the small package wrapped in black ribbon. As she untied it and unwrapped the light-colored paper, she discovered the familiar shade of green. It was a long, satin dress with thin straps, in the characteristic color of Aston Martin. She smiled to herself.

"I guess this is for tonight's dinner?"

Lance nodded, "Do you like it?"

"It's beautiful," she ran her fingers over the fabric, "I hope you have a shirt in the same color."

He chuckled.

"Don't worry, I won't disappoint you."

Indeed, at the agreed-upon time, Lance showed up at her door, wearing a shirt in the same color, black jeans, and matching shoes. He smiled at the sight of his friend, who opened the door ready to go.

"You look gorgeous. The color suits you."

Y/N laughed and closed the door behind her.

"That's good because otherwise, I would have to wear the white dress I brought with me, and someone might think I'm supporting Haas."

Lance laughed at her words, pleased to spend these few days with his friend. Honestly, he only stopped feeling lonely when she was around or when they had the chance to talk on FaceTime. Of course, it wasn't the same as having her physically by his side.

The evening passed in a pleasant atmosphere and time flowed effortlessly. Lawrence invited everyone who had arrived with Aston Martin to Bahrain, so instead of reserving a specific number of tables, Lance's father rented the entire restaurant for the evening.

Celebrating the team's excellent work during the winter months, the tables were adorned with champagne and white wine. Y/N had forgotten how weak her head could be, so after two glasses of wine during dinner, a slight buzz started to occupy her mind. Apologizing to Lance under the pretext of going to the bathroom, she stepped outside, sitting on the balcony. Despite being February, Bahrain offered pleasant temperatures, and even after the dark, a warm breeze caressed her exposed arms.

"Here you are."

The girl jumped, hearing his voice.

"You weren't around for half an hour, and I had the waitress check if something happened to you in the bathroom."

"I needed some fresh air."

Y/N replied, smiling at him. She noticed Lance's steps were a bit unsteady and a blush adorned his cheeks. When he sat next to her, she giggled.

"I can't believe we got tipsy."

Lance chuckled and rubbed his face with his hands.

"I won't lie, I'm feeling a bit dizzy."

Still giggling, the girl rested her head on his shoulder. Lance wrapped his arm around her waist and rested his cheek on her head.

"I'm glad you came."

"I'm glad you invited me."

"I'd give you the whole world if I only knew its price."

Hearing his words, Y/N raised her head and looked at his face. His brown, gentle eyes gazed at her affectionately and a faint smile played on the corners of his lips. Lance tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, gently caressing her cheek with his thumb.

"I hate that I can't give you anything in return."

Lance smiled, "Actually, there's something you could give me in return."

The girl raised her eyebrows inquisitively.

"You could be my girlfriend."

Y/N blinked several times, unsure if her slightly intoxicated mind was playing tricks on her or if she understood Lance correctly.

"Do you want me to be your girlfriend?"

"Oh, God, you have no idea how much."

The girl smiled and, without saying a word, cupped his cheeks in her hands and kissed him. Lance hugged her even tighter, returning the kiss, feeling a burst of fireworks in his stomach. He could bring her joy with money, and she could do it in just one way.

"I love you, Lance."

With love.

#f1 imagines #f1 #f1 one shot #formula 1 #f1 oneshots #f1 imagine #ls18 #lance stroll x reader #lance stroll x you #lance stroll #aston martin #aston martin f1

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pinkmirth · 8 months

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⸻ 𝒦ℰℰ𝒫ℰℛ!

𝒮𝒴𝒩𝒪𝒫𝒮ℐ𝒮 ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ you’ve fallen for your darling bodyguard, and you’re over the moon to discover that he feels the same. but this feels borderline forbidden . . . for just how long can you keep what you have with reiner under wraps?

𝒞𝒪𝒩𝒯𝒜ℐ𝒩𝒮 ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ ( 5k+ words of . . . ) bodyguard!reiner x fem!reader (black coded), fluff, nsfw, modern au, scion!reader (descending from a rich family/influential bloodline), hyperfeminine ‘girly-girl’ reader, reiner’s german, mutual pining, secret relationship / sneaky link, public display of affection (pda), food play, car sex (unprotected), slight dacryphilia, creampie, use of pet names ( e.g. mama, baby, honey, princess), reader calls reiner ‘ papa, ’ explicit language, lowercase intended, minors shoo!

𝓂𝓎 𝓁𝒾𝓉𝓉𝓁ℯ 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝓁ℯ𝓉𝓉ℯ𝓇! ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ this post is an answer to an anonymous ask: ‘ what about secret dates (turned sneaky links) with body guard! reiner??? ’ oh. my. goodness! nonnie, you’re a sexy genius and you should know it. tagging the amazing @ramonathinks! she’s the one who even introduced this bodyguard!rei-rei concept to me, and for that i’m so grateful :) ramona my love, thank you again for all the delicious reiner thoughts you always send my way! now enjoy, xoxo ♡︎

reiner’s your bulking shadow, never trailing too far behind.

he’s been hired by your parents to ensure your safety. nothing more, nothing less. he’ll follow your every step and drive you wherever you please; after all, it’s what he’s paid to do.

things started off the way they should— professional. from the very beginning, reiner knew to keep his distance, and that he did. but he soon realized just how hard that would become . . . you’re effortlessly gorgeous, sharp with your words and caring to a fault. his growing affection was only a matter of time.

nowhere on the criteria for the job does it say that he should be developing feelings. observing your habits, committing them to memory and predicting your behavior is the only thing he’s got any business doing. yet, he loves to feel the softness of your palm in his hand when he helps you into the backseat of your car, even if the contact is just for a split second at most. he finds himself peeking glances at you from the rearview mirror, soaking in how pretty you look when you’re unaware of his gaze. in truth, reiner wishes you didn’t have such an effect on him; that would make work-life much easier on his poor soul. well, love isn’t known for being simple, now is it?

it takes about four weeks on the job for him to grow a soft spot for you. reiner’s always been a hopeless romantic, oh-so quick to fall. he’d willingly lay down his life for the sake of your own, and not just because he’s getting a paycheck for it. thanks to the job description, his devoutness isn’t questioned.

before long, reiner can tell you’re becoming attached to him as well. on a fateful night, he even overhears the phone call between you and your friend, something about ‘ mister braun being so sexy that it hurts . . . ’ your bodyguard is nothing if not a man of dignity. he never meant to eavesdrop! it’s just that he's stationed outside your room for night patrol. he’s now especially glad about being up at five in the morning; he wouldn’t have been able to hear this otherwise. your confessions pry a subtle grin from his lips. there he stands, smiling to himself in the dimly lit hallway where nobody can see him blush like a schoolboy.

‘ nuh-uh, i can’t! that man works for my parents . . . he’s completely off-limits. it's a damn shame, isn’t it? ’ you release a sigh, one so exasperated that he can hear it through the other end of the door. call reiner crazy, but it sounds to him like you’re yearning to have him all to yourself. in a sudden moment, you're emerging from the room, donned in a tiny pink nightgown. cute, but thin as fuck. leaves nothing to the imagination, even. it’s the flimsiest thing he's ever seen you wear.

reiner’s cheeks burn so red that is downright embarrassing, thankfully you're unable to see him. he’s quick to lift his head and look towards the ceiling instead— much more suitable than ogling the tits of his very own client. you wouldn’t be able to catch him staring regardless, considering how the entire corridor’s tainted with darkness, but he wouldn’t dare try to steal a peek anyway.

what he can see, though, is your leisurely smile as you tell him you’re headed to the kitchen to grab a cool glass of water.

“would you like to escort me there too, mister braun? or can i go do something by myself for once?”

you’re playing with him, he realizes. just mere teasing meant to be absolutely harmless. your voice sounds much sweeter at this hour; soft and casual, coated lightly with fatigue from a busy day’s schedule.

“as long as we’re indoors, you can go anywhere you like, madam.” says reiner, “i’ll be here if you need me.”

you make your way to the refrigerator, prancing down the mansion’s luxe spiral staircase, and reiner’s rampant heart finally begins to calm. he wonders if you’d meant for him to hear you on that call. (by now, he knows just how cheeky you can be; it was definitely purposeful.) nevertheless, he's got a job to keep. neither your mother or father would respond kindly if they were to find out that he's become attached to you, or vice versa. he can hardly imagine playing the boyfriend when in reality, he’s supposed to be making sure nothing suspicious comes anywhere near a mile-long radius of you . . . it’s laughable! he’s sure your parents have more than enough money to make him disappear in the blink of an eye— that chilling fact alone puts him on his best behavior.

reiner decides to conceal it; the way he feels for you. keeps his back straight and arms folded to portray the unapproachable persona that got him hired in the first place. you eventually decide to question him over why he so-often wears that solid expression, ‘ like he doesn’t know how to smile, ’ is how you put it. it’s the very first time that you ever hear him laugh, and you turn out to like the sound. rumbly and full of bass. he couldn’t bring himself to admit that in every waking moment, it takes everything to suppress his smile whenever he sees you.

eight months of being in his company brings you to notice that reiner’s a decent listener. he makes for a great conversation, too. sure, he’s just your bodyguard, but he’s got a good ear and a smooth voice. your talks with him are always so lovely; he gives you the comfort to open up about things you’d never be able to tell your parents. pride washes over him when you admit that he’s the only one you genuinely trust. and in these moments, reiner allows himself to get vulnerable too. he tells you of his love for football as a youth, how he takes combat classes five times a week, and that he’s got tons of sisters, brothers and cousins back home in the countryside. the pair of you are so different that the contrast could almost be considered terrible. though, the longer you stay in each other’s presence, the less you can bring yourselves to care.

you and your bodyguard have grown . . . close, to say the least. the way you’re always latching onto his brawny form seems much more than friendly, especially to your parents. ‘ i feel secure with him! ’ is your claim. they’d beg to differ, but your wellbeing is enough to keep them satisfied. reiner excels at his job, and more importantly, the big blonde lug makes you happy. nobody they’ve hired in the past was ever able to get in your good graces; you utterly hated all your former bodyguards. they were much too controlling, lingered too close.

but mister braun was able to differentiate himself. he listens to your dreams and fears alike, treats you like a capable woman instead of some spoiled brat. it also doesn’t hurt that he’s incredibly easy on the eyes . . .

reiner can no longer take it. the woman of his dreams is right in front of him, and there’s not a damn thing he can do about it. the smoothest advance he can make is standing at your right side and slinking an arm around your waist, with claims of it being for your ‘protection.’ but the both of you know it’s only the proximity he’s chasing after. the way he looms beside you was always more self-indulgent than it was for safety. he just liked the closeness of it all.

he feels so much for you, and he’s virtually dying to tell you. but there’s countless reasons why he shouldn’t— particularly the risk of losing his job. every now and again, reiner chooses to be a little bit stupid, all consequences be damned. he works up the nerve to release his confession with slow and careful words. you quickly reciprocate, arms thrown around the back of his neck and tugging him into a cozy hug. he takes you by the waist and pulls you closer in— god, he’s been wanting to do this for so long. reiner hums when your manicured fingers ghost his nape, nails grazing the ends of his hair, with your tits pressed to his own chest. the pair of you fit better than he ever could’ve imagined.

you don’t know whether to call yours and reiner’s relationship ‘ official ’ — can it really be deemed as such when you’re the only ones who know? you dare not mention this to your parents, ‘cause he’s got a job to keep and you couldn’t possibly bear him not being around.

so, you’ve both decided that it’ll be a secret. shared only between you and him, so nobody’s able to intervene. dating your bodyguard is fun— brief kisses being shared when you’re the only ones in the room. the way he snugly hooks his arm around your body when escorting you feels tighter, a little more intimate. in a way, keeping things under wraps feels exhilarating.

your particular relation with mister braun isn’t verified to the outside world, but people are catching on. whenever you go out, reiner’s sure to follow. paparazzi-taken photos of you are occasionally uploaded to the internet, and it’s always a given that he’ll be included. after several months of being seen together time after time, it’s typical of people to assume that this so-called ‘ bodyguard ’ of yours is more of a boyfriend. they aren’t too far off, but you clearly won’t go out of your way to confirm their suspicions. you’re always captured in a picture of you clinging onto his burly arm with a glossy smile. your sweet expressions contrast nicely with his forever-furrowed brows. he’s handsome in this intimidating way, the tabloids say.

it’s a slow-moving thursday when reiner decides to take you on your first date with him. he waits a good hour and forty-five minutes for you to get ready. he’s used to this, of course. by now, he’s got nearly a year’s experience of waiting on you hand and foot. but tonight, his nerves get the best of him. you finish up when he least expects you to— for fuck’s sake, you even catch him pacing in the goddamn kitchen. the sight of you melts his concerns, just a little. you’re done up glamorously from head to toe, and reiner can’t contain his smile, nor hold back his stare. your light lashes are curled and wispy, with blush scattered along your cheekbones. your plush lips are pink with tint, and you’ve got on this figure-hugging outfit that he’d love to tear off of you.

you scan your surroundings, peering at every angle of your spacious home in search of your parents. after ensuring the coast is clear, you engulf him in your arms, wishing you could kiss him but you’re all dolled up and your lips are lined and glossed. reiner nuzzles his nose into the crook in your neck, inhaling faint traces of your most beloved vanilla parfum.

“god, you look so fuckin’ beautiful,” his whisper is soft against your warm flesh. you rub your hands along his broad shoulders, then slide them down his firm biceps. “and you look sexy in black,” you perk up at him, eyes round and gleaming. he loves you, he’s come to realize. and the last thing he wants is to screw this up . . .

he’s thinking too damn much. you can easily tell. it’s obvious in the way his thin blonde brows wire downwards like something’s wrong.

“reiner . . . stop it.” you order, voice serious. you only ever speak that way when you want his utmost attention. to that, he fixes his posture and stands tall as if he’s on patrol.

“stop what?” is his vague response, hands loosely positioned at either one of your hips. you lift your palms to cup his face, feeling the definition of his high cheekbones and firm jawline beneath your fingertips. he’s gorgeous, you think.

“for one, you’re clenching your teeth,” you mention, caressing his rigid jaw line until the tightness lessens. his stubble’s rough and scratchy, but it fits him so damn well. “and you’re frowing, baby.” next, your thumbs trail up to his brows, gently kneading at the creased arch. “relax.”

“m’sorry,” reiner lets out, tone low and pleading. his hands rub at your sides in an anxious pattern. “it’s jus’ that you’re so important to me . . . i wanna do this right, y’know?”

“i bet you will, rei. no need to worry, hm?” you shoot him a soft smile, and he returns it; one of the rare times you catch a glimpse of his nice and shiny teeth. “now show me a good time, papa.”

right before taking your leave , your parents have questions for you— almost too many. you don’t have any business meetings or mall trips on your schedule, so where on earth is he taking you to? rei-rei claims that he’s bringing you to a new restaurant that you’ve been meaning to try. he’ll drive you there and stay on patrol; or so he says. they decide not to question the unusually neat way his blonde hair is slicked back, or how his black dress-shirt and slacks look sharper than usual. hell, he smells amazing too. it can’t be denied that mister braun cleans up nicely.

see, reiner told a partial truth to your family. you’re on your way to a new german restaurant that’s about twelve minutes out, it’s just that you wanted to try it out with him in particular. on the drive there, you just can’t seem to restrain yourself from gazing at the man. reiner looks so put together like this, in a strapping black outfit that‘s snug against his arms, chest and thighs. his side profile’s flawless— he’s got a perfectly defined nose that slopes down to his lips, and you yearn to lick on his protruding adam’s apple. he’s got one hand on the wheel, merging into lanes and making u-turns, while the other that’s unoccupied intertwines with your softer, smaller one.

upon reaching a red light, he takes the opportunity to lift your hand up to his face, trailing his lips along the back of it. “lieblich . . .” he murmurs something in his native tongue that you can’t seem to understand, though you know its meaning is a sweet one. your grin makes him forget all about the risk he’s taking.

upon reaching your destination, reiner’s back in bodyguard-mode. that’s how he gets whenever you’re in public. yes, you’re on a date, but your safety will forever be his number one priority. he escorts you in with a large hand fit snugly into the small dip of your back as he confirms the reservation. his touch never leaves you, not even for a second. he does that thing; where he takes a brief one-over of the area, scrutinizing his environment before making the next move. you go one, two, three stories up, to the VIP floor where your dinner seats reside.

it’s a lot, he knows— the velvet floors, fancy cream-white seats and glass-like walls that showcase an aweing view of the city. you’re more than used to the finer things in life, so the only thing he wants to give you is what you deserve.

you’re raving on about how nice everything looks, leaning back into your seat as you sip on a flute of sheer-pink rosé. he’s relieved to know that he was able to make you smile tonight. a waiter presents themselves, and reiner effortlessly engages with them in german conversation. his words are smooth and fluid as he translates all the entrée and sides you asked for. even when placing a simple order, he’s still the sexiest man on earth. would now be a bad time to kiss the hell out of him?

the next three hours go by quick. you’re chatting and laughing and trying bits of each other’s platters ( though, it's mostly you eating a over half of the food from his plate . . . ) you got yourself salted-caramel ice cream for dessert, and reiner’s mischievous enough to lean close and lick the dripping residue off the corner of your lips. you gasp at him and deliver a playful kick to his foot from under the table.

“what? you had somethin’ there.” is the given excuse for his rascal behavior. naughtiness twinkles in his golden-brown eyes. there aren’t many people up here on the expensive floor, apart from two other occupied tables located on the other end of the room, and a handful of waiters that leave the kitchen every now and again. he’s lucky there isn’t anyone to catch you both.

“you’re crazy,” your laugh is infectious, “don’t make me return the favor.”

in a quick motion, reiner swipes a finger into the ice cream, his touch meeting a subtle cold. before the caramel gets the chance to melt all the way down the length of his digit, he smears some across his bottom lip. his tongue juts out to lick up the rest of the treat from his index finger.

“oh, please do.”

being away from probing eyes has made reiner bold as ever. you take him up on his request, tilting forward so that your tongue can eagerly swipe over his lips and wipe them clean. mostly sweet, just the tiniest bit salty. you want more of him already.

there’s isn’t a soul watching, so reiner escalates it. in an instant he’s got your lips merging, his hand squeezing your thigh from under the table, hot puffs of air escaping you both. “oh my god— you’re g’na get me in trouble, rei!”

“so be it,” reiner mumbles in reply, his words ticklish against your lips. from underneath his fingertips, reiner senses how tightly you press your thighs together, hungry for friction. he’s even beginning to feel worked up himself. but, the pair of you haven’t gone that far yet. the most you’ve done are hour-long makeout sessions on your king-sized bed in the earliest points of the day, when you have enough privacy to get away with it. but you wouldn’t mind feeling him in a new way tonight . . .

“you wanna get out of here, don’t you, mama?” reiner coos, cheeks rosier with his eyes slightly lidded. “mhm,” you’re quick to agree. so he puts the payment for the meal on his tab, takes your hand in his and leads you back down to floor one until you’re out of the building and back inside your window-tinted g-wagon.

mister braun is big. you’ve always known it from his appearance alone, but fuck, it holds a much greater meaning when he’s got you tucked into the backseat of your mercedes with his slacks pulled down to his ankles and your dress strewn sideways, making a slow attempt to press himself into you.

“fuck. let me in, princess,” reiner’s grunt is low, throaty enough to make you clench. your flesh feels hot and your pussy’s leaking all over the coffee-brown suede seats. he knows well enough to play around with your clit, reveling in the noises you make when his pressure increases. simultaneously, his lips suction at the smooth flesh of your neck. it feels like you’re burning up, and he’s the only one who can quench your fire.

experimentally, his hips tilt forward, and another two inches make its way in. he’s only got his fat tip and then some past that dripping hole of yours, but it’ll take much more to stretch you wide open for him. he’s groaning and muttering all sorts of profanities— about how tight you are, how good you feel, how fucking nasty this is of you.

“c’mon, woman,” reiner sucks a sharp breath into his lungs, goading you on, “lemme fuck this tight pussy.” he’s got you dangerously aroused, done by the effort of a few dirty words. wetness dribbles down from your slit to the place you and reiner carnally join, slicking up his girthy shaft as he continues to break himself past your tight rings of muscle. you claw at his solid arms, basking in the stretch. his size is imposing, forcing you open to accommodate all of him. it burns in the best way possible.

“m—more, papa,” you make out a pretty whine, knowing just how he loves your begging. you’ve got your lips agape, kissed raw from reiner’s earlier advances. you grow restless and begin to rock your hips, aching to take the entirety of him.

“mm, don’t worry, baby. i’ll give it to you so good,” it takes a little more of reiner bucking his pelvis, movements careful and shallow, for him to finally make it in. he’s bottomed out, and you can feel the throbbing from his underside. having you wrapped around him feels so incredibly right. you clench rapidly, enveloping him in an incomparable warmth.

by the time he’s made everything fit, you’re a darling little mess. your hair’s gotten frizzy and your eyes are all big ‘n glassy, with your lower lip tucked underneath your teeth. one moan after another escapes you, streaming into his ears like liquid gold. reiner throbs at the sound of every little mewl. he licks away your tears which you hadn’t even known began to fall, catching them before they can roll down the apples of your cheeks. you love the feeling, it’s just that there’s so much of him to handle at once— his fat cock, searing-hot tongue, large roaming hands . . . he's this close to consuming you whole, and you want him to.

reiner’s attentive with the way he fucks you. out, in, the pattern goes, hips drawing back before he slams back into your shaking frame all over again. he hits so unbelievably deep every time, like the width of him can’t help but prod against every spot you have. he manages to stimulate every inch of your walls, bumping every crook and ridge possible. not a part of you goes unattended to. reiner dips his head low to catch your beaded nipple between his lips, while his cock drives further inside and impels you to make more room, just for him.

as gentle as he may try to be, reiner’s undeniably a hefty man. taking it slow won’t make any difference; every deep plunge he makes into your cunt has the car creaking on its very own wheels.

“i fuckin’ love you,” he drops the heated words, punctuated with drilling thrusts; but the dick’s got you goin’ all dumb on him. it’s cute, he can’t deny, but reiner needs you to know exactly what you mean to him. so he grips at your chin from either side and lightly squeezes your cheeks together, tender with care but steady enough to make your eyes uncross and focus on him alone.

“you hear me? i— goddamnit, love you more than anything. love you so much,” the deeper he pushes in, the less you can manage to breathe. you feel the pulsing of his cock in your tummy, and it’s like the tip snags so deep that it nearly lingers in your throat. you feel yourself bounce against the seat, tits jiggling whenever he sinks inside, draws out, and snaps right back into you. your gut feels tightly wound up, and your pussy’s become impossibly more sensitive.

you’re close, he can feel it. your walls flutter with more ardor than before, squishing against the base of him with a tightness gratifying enough to spur moans from deep within his chest. you even bring your hands down to claw at his asscheeks, firm and round to the touch; the perfect source of leverage.

“r— reiner!” you cry out to him, and he’s sure his name hasn’t sounded so good up until now. he wonders if you can actually hear yourself and just how slutty you sound. “you’re close, aren’t you, baby?” to that you nod, head bobbing desperately. you don’t have to tell him, he knows. reiner’s knowledge is keen on the topic of you. what you like, what you don’t, and when you’ve had enough. now he’s truly taking his sweet time getting to know you from the inside out.

he presses a consoling peck to your forehead, maintaining that undoing pace of his. the repetitive ‘plat’ of his heavy balls smacking into your sticky cunt is dull compared to the huffing, panting and whining, but it’s there in all its vulgarity.

“ooh, i know exactly what y’need, princess. papa’s g’na take care of you . . . ” reiner doesn’t even say it above a whisper, just declares his devotion in the softest way he can. he slips a hand down the middle of your sweat-streaked bodies to bring some attention back to your precious clit, lewdly slick and much puffier than earlier. he gives swift strokes using the pads of his fingers, combined with the fluid roll of his hips, until you're arching into his broad chest and snapping your quivering thighs closed, trapping his wrist in between them.

reiner can unravel you with such ease, like he lives for the sole purpose of your pleasure and nothing else. you convulse against him, so he slows. but reiner hardly lets up. not completely, that way he’s able to ride you through it. he continues on, feeding you shallow thrusts to near his own high. his movements turn borderline erratic; thighs trembling, cock throbbing. he’s so close, “gonna cum,” his warning comes off as a groan, straight from the depths of his gut, erotic and primal. he’s clenching his teeth again— this time, for good reason. “where do y’want me?”

not a second is wasted before you plead, ‘ inside! ’ and with that, you’ve officially fucking broken him. never did he think his wildest dream would’ve come true by the very first date. lucky mister braun, getting to fill you up— especially when it’s what he’s been stroking himself to the thought of every other night. now, you’re practically crying for him to give it all to you. undoubtedly, he will.

he comes through one final, sloppy jerk of his hips. with a breathy grunt released into the car’s stuffy atmosphere , his warm seed spurts into you, tainting your womb. once reiner slips out, his thick cum pours down to present the most obscene view. it’s all so slippery, seeping down until there’s a wet puddle of your and his making beneath your ass. reiner’s body goes lax, thoughtfully balancing himself over you with his face propped onto your boobs. it’s only now that he realizes, legs cramped up, that he’s a bit too large for the backseat.

“ . . . i meant what i said earlier.” reiner’s voice comes off muffled, with his face stuffed between your tits and all. he looks adorable this way, gazing up at you with his lips curled into a slight pout. his arms loop your waist, snug and secure.

“mm, you said a lot of things earlier,” is your soft laugh, recalling his crude mouth and how worked up it made you. he allows you to rake your nails through his short blonde fringes.

“applying for this gig is the best thing that’s ever fuckin’ happened to me,” reiner makes an attempt to sit upright and show his conviction, but he ends up with his back hunched over in the restrictive space. he disregards his comfort and reaches for your hands, clasping them in his own. “i said that i love you . . . and i mean it.” his words are airy. he’s still winded from the sex.

“and i love you,” you mean it, too. with all your being. you love him in a way you've never loved anybody else. mister braun keeps you safe, sprinkles you with compliments, slips on your heels for you, puts you first. he makes you feel like this pairing has a chance, like you don’t have to hide it. besides, he deserves your all. you should be proud to call him yours, and that you are.

reiner always wants your kisses. in the morning when you wake, right before dinner, and as you’ve recently discovered, after sex too. you’re always eager to receive his lips pressed to yours. “i love you,” reiner adds in between pecks. he now says it like it’s second nature— he loves you. it makes your heart leap from beneath your chest. he kneads your bare thighs in his palms, slowly gliding his tongue into your mouth. without shame, you moan against his lips. slivers of spit tether you both even after you part.

“i want everyone to know that we belong to each other, reiner . . . my family, too.” you admit, peering up at his handsome face through your curled lashes. you’ve got your hands planted at his chest, feeling at the solidity of his pecs.

“tonight?” he asks, tone unsure.

“yes, tonight, rei!”

he adores your sudden zeal for honesty. he truly does, but—

“maybe another day would work better, princess,” reiner muses, “when your parents wouldn’t kill me for all those hickeys on your neck.”

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everythingne · 2 months

Text

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ➛ one and two - chapter one (ls2)

Your father, the President of The United States, has decided the only way to keep you ‘tame’ is up have you married off… to a Formula One driver..?

logan sargeant x first daughter!reader, smau and short fic

tws: arranged marriage,

fc: yasmin barbieri (and random other pinterest found photos)

yn.fdotus

liked by logansargeant, luis.fsotus, flotus, and 749k others...

yn.fdotus: taking a break from washington to see my collab with @ amaricarter at @ nyfw !!! aaaa!! geeking out a lil bit <3 all my hard work has finally paid off friends... many tears were shed xx

flotus: so so proud of my little girl!! cannot believe the woman you've grown into <3

user1: yn slaying in and outside of dc fr fr

user2: YESSS SLAY YN!!!

luis.fsotus: no pic credit :(?

⤷ yn.fdotus: this is for eating my panera >:(

⤷ panerabread: girlie dw we can hook u up with more <3

⤷ yn.fdotus: i love u panera <3<3

potus: so proud of you my little star!

user3: not her acc getting recommended to me bc logan sargeant follows her omg.

⤷ user2: no sameeee but i loveeee yn

user5: non-american f1 fans who love yn like this comment actually?

liked by 856 others...

user4: THATS MY FIRST DAUGHTER!!

“This is so stupid.” you grumble a complaint into the air, looking over at your mother as she laughs from where she sits in the William’s VIP room with your father and older brother-- both Santino Colombo, your father going by Santino and your brother going by Santi.

“He’s a nice young man!” Santino defends his actions as if he isn’t asking you to do the stupidest thing you’ve ever done. You have to pretend this guy who you have never met before is your boyfriend. Now, okay, you knew a bit about Logan because you’d been a fan of his for years because of your father’s love of Formula drivers, and Logan was the only American to get points in like… twenty years. You and Logan had followed each other on socials long ago when this first 'arranged marriage' thing was brought up. You'd spoken occasionally since, but nothing too serious. A flirt here or there, a joke, then mostly just formalities.

It wasn't that you didn't like Logan, he was a fine guy and easy on the eyes but it just felt... weird, to be forced into this.

With you being the more rebellious of the two of his kids, you had to be ‘locked up.’ Which was so stupid, your twenty six year old brother was a big party boy in college. Your father having paid off so many people to be hush about his drunken idiocy. But now he was already on his way to becoming a law firm CEO with a pretty wife and two daughters and you were a little fashion student who just had her first ever big break, never having done hard drugs or got the cops called on you like dear old Santi.

But you were a girl, something to be protected, and big breaks meant it was time for you to settle in the eyes of America’s leader.

And thus, your father got in contact with the Sargeants through Dalton somehow during your fathers candidacy. And now a year and two months later you were expected to be visiting your ‘secret boyfriend of two years.’

“He’s a wonderful guy,” Santino huffs at your obvious distaste, “I wouldn’t have agreed to this if I thought he was going to be bad for you, you know.”

“You didn’t even ask me! What if I had a boyfriend!”

“You didn’t.” Santi says after a sip of his champagne, “and, if you did, Dad would’ve just had you marry the guy you were dating.”

“If he passed the dad test.” you complain, making your brother laugh while your father just rolls his eyes. You don’t have time to say anything else because he’s standing up to greet James Vowles, the team principal of Williams, and you follow suit.

"So this is the woman Logan's been keeping a secret?" James grins and you realize, yeah, okay now it's time to act.

"Sorry he kept you in the dark for so long, Mr. Vowles!" You smile, glancing over James' shoulder as you speak to see who can only be Logan approaching, "Logan does speak very highly of you."

"As he does you." James nods, stepping back to allow you to happily pull Logan in for a hug. None of this is rehearsed. None of this is planned. Logan's arms slot naturally around yours life he was sculpted from the same marble, and your head fits perfectly under his chin. When you both step back, you let out of a soft giggle with flushed cheeks and try to not see the obvious overjoyed expression on your fathers face.

yn.fdotus added to their story!

Logan's drivers room is neat, tidy, but small. He lets you take up the somewhat comfy couch while he pulls his fireproof over his head with his back to you. You both have sat in silence for the past five minutes, your parents whisking you off to the 'comfort' of Logan's room so you both could bond.

"So." Logan turns around once he's fully changed into his racing gear, and you try your hardest to make sure your eyes don't wander because god damnit did those fireproofs have to be so tight?

"So?" You echo with a tad more curiosity in your tone and Logan pops down next to you.

"I was told we need to have a consistent story to not get caught." His eyes meet yours breifly before he's looking away, almost bashfully as his hand comes to toy with his hair, "but I have no idea what that should be."

"You were born in Fort Lauderdale, right?" You ask, and when Logan nods you grin, "Alright, here it is, we were neighbors growing up. Your brother and my brother were really good friends, since I think they're the same age? We tagged along with the older brothers. When you moved we lost contact, but, when you started racing in Formula I got in contact with you via Instagram and the rest is history."

"Childhood best friends seems American enough," Logan grins and a laugh barks out of you that you aren't expecting. A smile pokes at his face and he looks away, almost like he's shy about making you laugh, which is only solidified by the blush you notice on his cheeks.

"Alrighty then, childhood best friend." You tap his thigh with your heel from where your legs are crossed, eyes peeking up as someone knocks on the door.

"Come in," Logan calls, his hand going to rest on your knee before none other than Alex Albon pops open the door with a very curious Lily behind him.

"Oh! Good." Alex steps in, letting Lily in before the door clicks shut. You can see Logan send Alex a confused look before the Thai driver opens his mouth and just says whatever comes to mind.

Which is, "How the fuck did you rizz her?"

"Alex!" Lily whacks her boyfriends arm and you can't help but burst into laughter, hiding your face in Logan's shoulder as you do. You miss whatever defense Logan throws at Alex because of the feeling of Logan pulling you closer by your thigh. It shocks you how much his touch feels like fire against your skin.

"All her," is what Logan says when he turns to you and the smile that crosses your face is natural as you shrug. Lily comes over to introduce herself, leaving Logan and Alex to bicker as she pulls you into a carefully coordinated hug.

"It's so nice to have another girl in the Williams garage." She says as she steps back, and you stand to continue the conversation a bit further away from whatever argument Alex has undoubtedly pulled Logan into now. Logan's hand squeezes your wrist when you walk away, a small fleeting touch, and it makes your cheeks red.

Shit. Why was he making you so flustered?

yn.fdotus

liked by alexalbon, logansargeant, oscarpiastri, and 787k others...

yn.fdotus: hot girls ditch f1 for affogato 🩵

tagged: lilymhe

lilymhe: @ logansargeant can u fight.

⤷ logansargeant: i think alex would kill me if i even breathed wrong next to you, so no.

⤷ alexalbon: i would. i would.

user1: NO FUCKING WAY??

lilymhe: LOML !!!! <3<3<3

⤷ yn.fdotus: UGH I WOULD DIE FOR U STOP <3

⤷ user2: LILY AND YN!!!!! A DUO!!! (yn design something for lily)

liked by yn.fdotus

"Are we like soft launching it?" You ask Logan as you wait for him to be called out to race, he's been fiddling with his sleeve for the past five minutes in agonizing silence. So you try and get his mind off the upcoming race.

"What?"

"Us, are we just gonna like... kiss after the race and be caught by cameras? Or try and like... be sneaky with it? Like pretending we're hiding from cameras but letting them catch us and whatnot."

Logan blinks, his hand falling from fiddling with his sleeve to his lap where you've laid your legs over. ("So you can get used to how close we have to be for media," Logan had suggested.) His hand comes to rub small circles just above your knee as you lean back against the back of the couch.

"I... is there one you prefer?" He asks, pulling out his phone to do what looks like texting someone back, "I can do either, I just don't wanna make you uncomfortable."

"I think teasing it would be really cute," you smile and he nods, asking for you to explain, so you burst into a long list of ideas. Fleeting touches, hugs that last just a bit too long to be platonic, pictures of gifted bouquets and hidden faces for 'date nights' and early mornings. He smiles at you enthusiasm as you explain every little minute detail, and then he just takes one of your hands in his and presses a kiss to the back of it.

"Just tell me when, and I'm yours." He whispers, and you try to ignore the obvious affection in his eyes that has your cheeks warming up.

yn.fdotus added to their story!

Logan scores points. You're not even sure what place he ends up in, but you just know he scores points by the way Williams is cheering. You can even hear Logan laughing over his radio and your heart is in your throat as you join Lily in jumping up and down in excitement. Both Alex and Logan has gotten points, for the first time this season.

Your feet carry you, Lily pulling you along, your family laughing as you're brought to the garage and away from them. She detaches when Alex is out of his car, happily extending an arm for Lily to attach to his side as he holds his helmet in the other.

You, however, stop dead in your tracks.

Logan's tugging off his balaclava with the biggest smile on his face. The crows feet of his eyes tight with the smile that pulls them in, same with the way his cheeks puff out in happiness. You can't help but feel a blush on your face at the sight of him, sweaty, and yet with that amazing post-race glow your sister had joked about.

Holy shit, it really was a thing.

You feel cameras on you as you slowly make your way over, finding your footing like a fawn until Logan spots you and-- if possible, his grin grows even wider. You smile, quickening your steps until your pressed firm against his chest. His broad shoulder blocking the light as his arms encircle you, protecting you from the world as he dips his lips down to whisper.

"You can't look at me like that if we're soft-launching." He laughs and you follow suit, arms tight around his waist as you quickly reply,

"I'm just so proud of you, you drove really well today."

His arms tighten a bit more and you assume this is the whole, hugs that are a bit more than platonic bit. When you step back, he keeps his eyes on you and one hand on your back as Alex comes over to celebrate with him.

Later that night, a text lights up your phone,

'if you want a full miami day, tomorrow ill pick you up around nine?"

And the giggles that leave you are genuine as you throw yourself out of bed to pick out some clothes for the list of activities that Logan has planned.

yn.fdotus added to their story!

tag list (comment to be added, and thanks for those who are already on it !)

@hiireadstuff @tigerlily789 @minkyungseokie @woozarts @motheraiya @uzisplanet @struggling-with-delia

#logan sargeant fic #logan sargeant fanfic #logan sargeant imagine #logan sargeant x reader #logan sargent x reader #f1 smau #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #formula one fic

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natailiatulls07 · 4 months

Note

could i request some leclerc!reader and so comfort with charles please

It's okay

Arthur Leclerc Charles Leclerc Lorenzo Leclerc Pascale Leclerc & Leclerc!reader

Summary - In order to find her way in life, Y/n Leclerc runs away in the dead of night only leaving a note

Warning - neglection, running away

Growing up with three older brothers and two of such competing in karting competions, life was hard for Y/n Leclerc. Pascale and Hervé invested lots of their money and energy into Arthur and Charles.

When she was seven, Y/n's interest in ballet started. The young girl had her heart set on being a professional ballerina. So thats what she did. Y/n convince Pascale to enrol her in ballet class.

From then on, she became more and more talented. Quickly becoming the top of class. Yet when recitals came round and she was the lead, the only person who came to watch was Lorenzo.

The rest of the family were out at karting competitions cheering on Charles and Arthur. Yes they would apolgise to Y/n for their absence but to her it never really felt quite right.

Y/n was 14 years old, life got harder. Karting turned to formula 2 and E. Lorenzo now building his own life, he moved out of the house.

And the worst of all, Hervé Leclerc passed away. This meant attention was limited, Pascale was busy. She had her salon to run, she was running around supporting the two boys racing and she was mourning the lose of her partner.

As much as he wanted to support Y/n during her recitals, Lorenzos life became busier and he could no longer come along each recital. She felt as though no one her family could see her or her talent.

So what did she do? Y/n collected enough money to enrol herself into a ballet academy. In the dead of night she packed just enough and left without a sound. Of course she couldn't leave without leaving a note, she loved her family.

Dear Maman, Charlie and Arthur, I love you all dearly, please don't worry about me. I will be gone for a while, Lo Lo knows where I will be but please do not pester him. Thank you for everything and more Love from your dearest daughter, Y/n xx

Y/n Leclerc was a sensation, one of the best of her age. She was a household name, even if you weren't that well educated on ballet you knew who this elegant women was.

However, it was rare for the ballerina to speak publicily, Espercially as many would ask of her surname and family relations. And it wasn't hard to understand why.

"So Y/n please tell me, any relation to formula one driver Charles Leclerc?"

"No comment, thank you"

Charles, Arthur, Pascale and Lorenzo watched on, following her social media through burner accounts not wanting to make this harder for Y/n.

They could see how she spent most of her time dancing, spending time to herself or getting cocktails with friends she made along the way.

yourusername

Week in my life...

Spending time alone, you must prioritize self care

Fruit cocktails with friends, the key to my heart

Looking after the minis, they're the cutest little things

Lounging on my sofa after a long day of rehearsals, it is tiring!

Liked by cl_2648749 and 146,283 others

comments are limited

username Gorg gorg girlie

cl_2648749 <3

username I so wanna be her friend omfggg

But she wasn't stupid, Y/n knew who those burner accounts were. Every single post, the burner accounts were there front and center. She felt their eyes on her, it was silly really but she constantly felt like they were watching her.

However, Y/n felt warm with that in mind. Like they were finally noticing her for the first time. No longer was she fighting for the attension with her two older brothers. But was it just online? If she were to go back, would it go back to how it was before.

Plus she had built up a life on ballet. Y/n made a family with her friends. Everyone knew her, fuck she is a household name hiding her Leclerc identity from the world, even herself.

"I think it's a good idea! It's been long overdue in my opinion"

"No. We need to work to her choices, not make her uncomfortable."

"Okay when?!" Charles throws his arms in the air with frustration. He was pacing in front of the television; Arthur, Pascale and Lorenzo all sat on the sofa watching him.

The topic of Y/n came up in passing by Arthur and it became much more. Charles was fighting, he was desperate to get his dear little sister back home. However Lorenzo, knowing how Y/n felt about everything, was fighting back and trying to prioritize her feelings.

The constant pacing stopped abruptly, and Charles turned to look at Lorenzo with a harsh glare. "Why do you want to so desperately work to her choices? Are you in contact with her?" You could hear a penny drop.

Eyes snapped over to the oldest boy, all confused and harsh. Lorenzo sunk into himself. "I um..." He took a deep breath before continuing. "Yeah um so I kept contact with her yes"

"Is she okay?" The first question Pascale asked. Years of guilt plagued her mind, she neglected her own daughter and she was now paying the price for that.

Lorenzo nodded. "Yes, she's okay...Y/n she um built up a family through her friends and as you know she is doing well for herself..." A small proud smile morphed onto his face, he was proud of her for doing this for herself.

"Does she hate us for what we did?"

He breathed in and out. "No, she doesn't hate any of us...she understands completely..." That did ease some guilt for the other three, it would of killed them to know that she hated them, her own family.

There was silence for a couple of minutes whilst they all fell into their own thoughts. And then Pascale spoke up again. "Can you at least text her or call her whatever...talk to her, please tell her that we love her and that we want to see her again...we're so so proud and sorry"

Arthur and Charles both nodded in agreement. "I'll see what I can do..." Lorenzo promised.

It seemed that the next time they would see Y/n would come round much soon than expected. It wasn't planned, totally sporadic.

Charles was in the kitchen, in Lorenzos apartment. He was scrolling through his phone when there was a ring coming from Lorenzos phone. "Lorenzo! Your phone, it's ring!" Looking over the driver read the name.

Y/n

He knew it was wrong to answer the call, but it felt right like this would do something so he did. Charles picked up the phone and answer.

Before he could speak the voice he missed so dear filled his ear, yet it was panicked and he could hear uneven breathing.

"Lo I'm sorry please, I came back to Monte C but uh um the paps they um oh my god I can't breathe they keep following me! Please please I don't- I don't know where to go!" He missed her voice, granted it for much more mature and wiser now, he still missed it.

Though he was entranced by the situation, now very concerned. "It's okay, it's okay" His mind was on speed mode, much like it was in the car. "Send me the location, I'll come and collect you"

Y/n's voice came out calmer and confused now. "Cha...is that you?"

Charles nodded his head before realising she couldn't see him. "Yeah um it is Cha, I'm on my way" He rushed down to his ferrari.

Pulling up to her location, his heart clenched. Y/n had grown so much since he had last seen her, she had grown into herself and looked alot like Pascale now.

Charles climbed out of his car, walking over to her and collided her into a bone crushing hug. "Oh chérie, je suis vraiment désolé..." Oh darling, I'm so sorry

Tears soaked his shoulder, the whole chaos of the day and reuniting with her older brother weighing down on Y/n had finally toppled off completely.

She couldn't speak, just hung onto him. That long time spent away from her family catching up to her. "It's okay...it's okay..." Charles whispered in her ear.

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wholoveseggs · 4 months

Note

HIYA GORGEOUS!! I absolutely adore all that you write and here I am once again to request something (tbh I’ll always be here to request things 🤭). So I’d like to request…

y/n (aka me) is Elijah's best friend but she's never met Klaus, only heard about him. one day she surprises Eli for his birthday so she walks in the compound, not knowing that Klaus is there too. she and Elijah exchange hellos then talk for a bit and before they can leave (Elijah is subtly trying to rush her out), Klaus hears her voice and comes downstairs. I'll leave the details to you but she and Klaus instantly hit it off so much so that it makes Elijah jealous (he's always had a thing for y/n but never said anything be he's afraid of losing their friendship). again, leaving the details to you. can we make it a 2-parter? 1 is jealousy/angst w/ implied smut between y/n and Klaus & 2 is Elijah confessing to y/n his feelings which lead to their first time sex and possible future relationship.

Sorry love if this is too much, it's okay if you're not up for it though! Thanks for even indulging me! 🤍

Mine

THIS SCENE MAKES ME GO FERAL

18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}

Part One

A drunken hookup with Klaus complicates your friendship with Elijah, leading to an awkward morning after.

♡♡ Thanks for the request sweet Aurora!! This one was a blast to write. But implied smut with Klaus??? Nahhh. No half-measures here. This is for all my Klaus girlies. You can't fix him, but you sure can fuck him. ♡♡

5k words - Warnings: smutttt {with Klaus}, rough sex, mild choking, Klaus being the drama, Elijah hiding his feelings & Rebekah judging you.

{Part Two}

You came rushing through the gates of the compound, carrying so many shopping bags that you could barely see. Your arms felt on fire, but a little strain was worth it all when you remembered who you were doing this for.

Tonight was Elijah's big birthday bash, put together by you and Rebekah, and you wanted everything to be perfect. Elijah had become one of your closest friends, and this celebration was your chance to show him how much he meant to you.

"Eli, I have so much stuff for the party. Where should I put it all?" you ask once you got far enough into the house.

Elijah emerged from the grand living room and came into the foyer to help you. He had an odd look on his face, but you couldn't really pinpoint it exactly. He took the bags from your arms and carried them himself.

"Don't look in them! I want it to be a surprise!" You said, putting your hands over his eyes and guiding him towards the table.

Elijah chuckled, "Fine, Fine. Are you sure all of this is necessary?"

"Absolutely." you said, uncovering his eyes. "You only turn 1040 once," you joked, causing the pair of you to laugh.

It was over-the-top as shit, but a girl had to take any opportunity to give a Mikaelson a birthday they would remember, and then some.

Elijah's smile faltered a bit as he looked around the courtyard nervously. "Will you be returning home to get ready for tonight?" He asked, trying not to sound hopeful.

"I'm actually getting ready here with Bekah, why? Have a hot date you are hiding from me?" You teased, unaware of the way Elijah's body stilled at your words.

"Oh no darling, no date, just a brother he wants to hide," said an accented voice from the second level balcony.

Elijah let out a rough sigh as you turned to see Klaus stepping down the stairs towards you both.

You had heard of the legendary hybrid of course, but since you met Elijah you had yet to run into him. In fact, this was the first time you had seen Klaus in person and were unaware of the true look of him. Which made you almost go weak in the knees.

He was hot, like 'fuck me right now hot' and it took everything in you not to drool. It didn't surprise you, all the other Mikaelsons were extremely attractive, so it only stood to reason their infamous hybrid brother would be also.

You could tell by the look on his face he found you just as attractive, and with a devilish smirk, he seemed to say ‘I will fuck you right now if that's what you wish’

"Hello love, it's a pleasure to finally meet you," he drawled before bringing your hand up and kissing it softly.

You wanted to hate him. Klaus had been notorious for so long for his tantrums and viciousness. But one look and just a touch from his lips and you knew you were doomed.

"T-Thanks," you said, pulling your hand back.

Klaus tucked a piece of hair behind your ear and ran a thumb across your cheek.

"Are you blushing for me? Can't say I blame you, love," he said cockily.

Elijah rolled his eyes at his younger brother's antics, but as Klaus lingered on your skin he felt a stir of possessiveness settle in his bones. He cleared his throat, shooting his brother a glare,

"I would love some help setting up the party for your brother," you asked Klaus, hoping to spend more time with him, his charm quite intriguing.

"It's alright, I can help you," Elijah insisted, not wanting Klaus to interact with you for a multitude of reasons.

"It's supposed to be a surprise for you Eli,” you pouted, which caused Elijah to soften at your cuteness.

"I've got it handled, Eli," Klaus teased, emphasizing the nickname you used for him.

Elijah looked between the two of you, clearly wanting to decline your request and keep you both apart. But alas, for some reason, he couldn't come up with a legitimate reason.

Klaus grabbed your bags and walked off, you began to follow, turning back to give Elijah a wide smile. "See you tonight, birthday boy," you exclaimed happily before hurrying off after the younger Mikaelson.

You spent all afternoon decorating with Klaus, who insisted you call him Nik. He was somewhat sweet but full of himself. Yet, you enjoyed his company, he had a good eye for décor and matched your vision effortlessly.

"Have I accomplished my mission?" he asked. He brought a champagne bottle up, pouring two glasses and giving you one.

You leaned against the pillar with him and clinked your drinks together. "I'd say so, yes. Thank you so much for helping me."

"It was no trouble at all," Klaus said, then smirked at you over his glass. "You are quite stunning, love."

You grinned at his comment, "you should see me after I get all dressed up for tonight," you flirted, even though it sounded more like a challenge to him.

Klaus downed his drink then placed it on the table. Without warning, he pinned you to the pillar and trapped you against him. "Oh I plan on doing more than looking tonight," he said as his hungry eyes traveled over your body.

"I see you two have finally met, how wonderful," Rebekah commented, disrupting the moment.

You laughed nervously, glad for the interruption, gently pushing Klaus off of you. As much as you wanted to jump Klaus then and there, something held you back. And you knew what, or rather, who was keeping you from acting on your desires...

"We were just having some champagne," you tell her, taking another drink.

"I see that, the decorations look amazing by the way," she complimented as she poured herself a glass as well. "Catering has arrived, they are setting everything up downstairs," she informed you, letting you know you should probably get ready.

"I'll go get dressed then. Thank you again, Nik." You smiled at him again, and he grinned in response.

"I think I'm owed a dance for my hard work," he told you as you walked away with Rebekah.

You looked over your shoulder at him and gave him a wink, excited for the party to begin.

Once you were upstairs and away from Klaus, Rebekah spoke quietly to you. "Be careful with him, he's not like Elijah," she warned you.

"No one is like Elijah," you chuckled a bit, ignoring the pang of sadness you felt at the realization you would probably never be with the older Mikaelson.

The two of you spent your time getting ready, sipping on champagne and discussing the numerous guests who would be arriving. You got a little too buzzed, but you were excited and also needed some courage to face an unknown quantity of vampires.

Rebekah always had impeccable taste, helping you pick out a skin tight dress that came a few inches above your knees and accentuated every curve on your body. Adding even more with the tall black heels you slipped on, showing off your legs.

"I'm afraid I might have gone too far," Rebekah chuckled as she applied your makeup, making you look smolderingly hot.

"You think?" You asked sarcastically.

"You look like vampire bait and I'm sure it's going to drive him mad," she snorted, taking another drink.

"Who?" You looked at yourself in the mirror and fixed a smudge of lipstick.

Rebekah gave you a knowing look, but stayed quiet and you just smiled back at her innocently.

When everything was ready and all the guests started arriving, you and Rebekah made a grand entrance into the main parlor. Elijah was talking with someone when his eyes caught you across the room, you wandered over to him and gave him a big hug.

"Happy birthday," you whispered in his ear, as his arms pulled you tighter to him.

"Thank you so much," he said, pulling back just enough to smile at you, his face growing even brighter when he really looked at you.

You noticed the way his eyes traced your figure, taking you all in. The way they darkened a bit with pure desire, making you instantly become hot all over. But it was probably just your imagination, brought on by all the champagne you've been drinking.

You almost made a move right then, but the person he was conversing with interrupted and you found yourself drawn away by Bekah and her friends. Leaving Elijah to watch you from afar as you conversed with them, laughing and drinking.

Hours later, you were still in the middle of the large group of people, even dancing to the music that was blaring through the place. You saw Elijah dancing with a beautiful woman and you wanted to be happy for him, but then the woman whispered in his ear and touched his chest, and your mood immediately soured.

You went to the bar to get a drink, deciding more alcohol might be what you needed to wash away all your confused feelings.

"Thirsty, love?" Asked a familiar voice in your ear as your body was pulled back to collide with a strong chest. You could smell the scent of Klaus's cologne and instantly felt turned on.

"Very," you said, downing your entire shot.

He spun you around to look into your eyes, both of his hands on your waist, drinking in your appearance.

"You didn't have to do all this for me," Klaus teased, his eyes on your chest as he licked his lips. "I'm a sure thing, darling, you know that,"

You couldn't help but laugh. He may have been a lot of things, but he was definitely entertaining. You shook your head, but smiled all the same.

"I only ever dress up for myself, Nik," you sassed back to him, looking up through your lashes.

A slow smirk came to Klaus's face as he leaned in and captured your lips in his. He hummed into the kiss and his grip tightened on you. He pulled away, your lipstick was still on his lips.

You giggled and wiped it off, as he ordered you another drink. Not that you really wanted one but damn, he was good at persuading people.

"I recall that you owe me a dance," he reminded you, taking a sip of his own beverage.

"Oh?" You said innocently, fiddling with the many necklaces he was wearing. "I don't remember agreeing to anything," you flirted.

"Well, perhaps a private dance then," he teased, giving you a mischievous smile.

"Maybe I'll surprise you later," you whispered, leaning in and sucking his bottom lip into your mouth and playfully biting it, loving the look of surprise and arousal on his face.

Then you turned and sauntered away, leaving him standing there at the bar to watch you. You were definitely going to end up in his bed tonight, but you wanted to make him squirm a little. Or rather, a lot.

You moved through the crowd to see Elijah and the woman dancing close, whispering things to each other. Well, actually, only she was talking. He seemed like he wasn't paying too much attention to the conversation she was having with him.

You gave him a wave and a smile, pointing at the woman and giving him an encouraging thumbs up. You don't know why you did it. Your chest did funny things seeing him with someone else though.

He returned your smile but didn't do much else before she spoke in his ear again and he allowed her to lead him out of the crowd.

You guessed Elijah was tired of his own party and went off to have some fun, and you were determined to have the same.

Klaus found you sitting on the couch, a cocktail and a plate of various snacks in front of you. You were thoroughly bored as you couldn't find him again.

He came from behind and crashed beside you, taking the glass out of your hand and finishing it, then set it aside.

"Hey! That was mine," you scolded playfully.

Klaus put his arm around you and kissed your neck. "How about you stop pretending you're enjoying yourself and come upstairs with me?" He suggested.

You laughed, and then he abruptly pulled you up and practically carried you through the door leading upstairs, pinning you to the wall at the top of the steps.

"Nik," you tried to say while laughing. "You can't just haul me off and have your way with me," you protested as his lips got closer to yours.

"Tell me to stop and I will," he taunted, bringing his lips to yours in a rough kiss.

You felt like you couldn't breathe, everything moving so fast. Klaus didn't even give you a chance to respond, lifting you so your legs wrapped around him.

He walked into a room and shut the door, setting you down on his desk. You realized that you were in his infamous art studio, looking around as Klaus hovered over you. You felt his lips on your neck, kissing every inch until you moaned.

Then he found the tiny zipper of your dress and slid it down, exposing your breasts. He smirked, reaching to tweak your nipple as he took you in. "Well then, love. Now I truly see why my brother has hidden you from me," he said huskily.

You giggled at his compliment but then you couldn't form words as he yanked the rest of your dress off you. You sat on the desk naked, save for your heels and nothing else.

"Dear lord, you are gorgeous," Klaus muttered, touching you everywhere.

You pulled him close by his shirt collar and locked lips. You bit his bottom lip harshly and he growled, his eyes flashing gold. The way his eyes changed on you was the hottest thing you've seen.

You pulled his shirt off him, tossing it to the floor before unbuckling his belt, wanting him as naked as you were. Once you had him bare, you raked your nails down his chest and he chuckled.

"You want to play rough, don’t you love?" He whispered as he nipped at your neck.

"Maybe," you teased, "what are you going to do about it?" You questioned, leaning back on the desk a little and spreading your legs for him, getting wet at the promise of a wild night.

Klaus's breath hitched when you touched yourself for him, his eyes completely transfixed on you. He was definitely intrigued by how confident you were.

"Well then," he growled before he roughly pinned your legs open, his hands squeezing your thighs harshly. He brought your body to the edge of the desk, kneeling in front of you as he ran a thumb over your dripping wet center.

He hummed at your scent as he pulled you forward a bit more to devour you, making you yelp in surprise, your hands tugging on his curls.

He was good, really good, and your toes curled at the pleasure you were receiving. It only got better when you saw his golden eyes as he gazed at you with a possessive glint, the vibrations from his own groans of enjoyment hitting you just right.

But before you could climax he pulled back and stood up, making you whimper and sit up on the desk, wanting him to continue.

Klaus chuckled at your impatience, pulling you into another searing kiss as you moaned. He broke it and gave you a smug smile, before wrapping his hand around your throat.

You were panting with need, your hand moving down to his cock and he hissed at your touch. He moved forward so he was resting between your thighs again as you stroked him slowly.

You both stayed this way for a moment, staring at each other. Until finally Klaus couldn't stand it any longer and roughly turned you around to face the desk. He pushed on your back until you were bent over on the wood, making you giggle with anticipation.

He smacked your ass hard, turning your giggle into a gasp as you looked back at him. He did it again and again until it was stinging. You wanted him so badly, it was unbearable.

You reached back for him and he lined up his cock to your entrance, sliding it up and down a few times until you were nearly shaking. He finally gave in and pushed into you, his hand tugging your hair until you arched into him, and he sank into the hilt.

He hissed at the sensation and you were about to tell him to move but he started fucking you without you needing to, hard and rough and perfect. He had you moaning with each thrust as you grabbed onto the desk, holding on tight as his body collided with yours, skin slapping as you got closer to climaxing.

It was hot and a little dirty, just what you had needed. Your moans only spurred him on as his hands explored your body while he took you from behind. The force of his thrusts causing items on his desk to clatter to the floor, but you both were far too gone to care.

He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you back into him, making you stand so his other hand could roam your front. He moved up to massage your breast while pinching and tugging on your nipple until you moaned. He was clearly determined to make you come first and was going to enjoy doing it.

"Nik!" you whined his name when he pinched you a bit too harshly. You felt his lips on your neck, his fangs grazing the skin as he left hickeys.

You tilted your head for him and he smirked, licking your pulse point and gently nibbling. His thrusting becoming erratic as his hand slipped to your clit to rub fast circles until your legs started trembling and you let out a scream as your orgasm crashed into you.

He hummed in approval and thrust into you a few more times before you felt him filling you up with his cum, and you giggled from the sensation. He released you from his grasp and you leaned back down on the desk, turning around to face him.

You both were sweaty and exhausted but extremely satisfied. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close, placing soft kisses all over your face as you giggled again, trying to move away from him.

He grabbed your dress and handed it to you before slipping on his pants, leaving his shirt off. He gave you a soft kiss on the lips and then turned away, starting to pick up the fallen objects from his desk and placing them in their correct places.

You watched him in a daze, your body tingling as you pulled your dress back on.

"So, love, my room is right next door, if you care to continue our celebration?" He said with a smug smirk, giving you a wink.

You giggled again and nodded, knowing it was probably the alcohol giving you your confidence, but you were going to ride the wave (and him) until the end.

Klaus woke to find you peacefully asleep in his bed. He leaned down to give you a gentle kiss on your forehead as you stirred slightly.

It was quite a night.

He took his time to admire your body and then your beautiful face. The way your eyelashes brushed your cheekbones as you slept, and your lips were parted slightly.

He got out of bed and got dressed, heading downstairs to find some blood and coffee. Elijah was in the kitchen reading his morning paper and looking every bit as dignified as always.

Klaus poured himself some coffee and started drinking it. He glanced around and saw there was no one else there but his brother, and he was smirking before he even opened his mouth.

"How was your night, Elijah?" He asked teasingly.

Elijah took his time to respond. He folded his paper up, placing it beside him as he eyed his younger brother suspiciously, he always had an innate sense to when Klaus was up to something.

"Quite fine. Why do you ask?"

Klaus's smirk grew bigger. He didn't say anything else and went about making himself something to eat. He felt Elijah's eyes boring into him the whole time, knowing that he wanted an answer but Klaus wouldn't give it to him just yet. He just loved torturing his big brother, even after a thousand years it was still highly entertaining.

"Your friend is an excellent host," Klaus started off with, his back turned as he chopped some fruit to put into a smoothie. He could almost hear the wheels turning in Elijah's mind as he tried to figure out where Klaus was going with this. "You really should have introduced me to her sooner."

Elijah sighed heavily. Klaus glanced behind him, and he had an annoyed expression on his face. He wasn't getting anything from Elijah so he turned to face him, his smirk returning.

"I showed her how much I appreciated her hard work last night. Several times actually, in my studio, a few times in my bed and then in the shower," he added as his smirk got wider and his tone became suggestive. "I dare say I've never been ridden so spectacularly before in all my years,"

Elijah abruptly stood, opening his mouth to say something, but that's when Klaus turned on the blender. Looking at Elijah apologetically and holding a finger to his ear and shrugging his shoulders.

"What's the matter brother?" he shouted over the blender. "You look a bit upset. You know it's not very healthy to bottle up all of your feelings,"

He stopped the blender and poured himself a glass, then another for Elijah as he handed it to him. Elijah just glared at him and poured the smoothie down the drain, setting the glass in the sink.

"That's rather rude, Elijah," he scolded teasingly. "I made that just for you,"

"Have you no shame, Niklaus?" He asked harshly, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Noooo, shame is for boring people," he taunted. "Why are you so upset? Aren't you happy for your friend? I can assure you that she enjoyed herself immensely,”

Elijah snapped. He couldn't take anymore. He walked over and grabbed Klaus by the shirt collar, and shoved him against the wall roughly, holding him in place.

"You know how I feel about her and yet you slept with her anyway," Elijah seethed.

Klaus raised his eyebrow. "If you want her, then you should of taken her yourself," he snapped, his eyes flashing gold in challenge. "It's your loss anyway," he added, shoving him back and adjusting his collar, then smoothing out his shirt.

Elijah was livid. He knew it was just Klaus's way of being obnoxious, but that didn't make it any easier to handle.

"I can't get the vision of her tits bouncing in my face out of my mind, Elijah," Klaus taunted him again. "Perhaps if you're lucky, you'll get to experience it for yourself," he said, brushing past his brother and walking away with a laugh.

You woke in Klaus' bed with a terrible hangover and an empty spot beside you. You sat up, your head spinning a bit as the memories of the night before came flooding back.

Oh God, you slept with Elijah's brother.

You covered your face in embarrassment. You got drunk, got laid and it was with the worst person you possibly could of picked.

Elijah was going to kill you. He's been protecting you from his brother and here you go, having sex with him in his bed. You could imagine how disappointed he was in you right now.

You quickly got dressed and made your way downstairs, needing some coffee and possibly a few pain pills to try and take the edge off your headache.

Klaus was walking away from the kitchen, a devious smirk on his face. When he saw you, his grin got even bigger, but he said nothing, just gave you a wink.

You turned red in embarrassment and dashed into the kitchen, finding Elijah sipping his morning coffee while reading his paper. He looked up when he saw you enter and then he folded the paper and placed it on the island.

"Morning," he started off in a professional tone. You hated how he sounded.

You grabbed a mug and poured the liquid into it. Elijah was silent as he waited for you to face him, and once you had taken a few sips, he was standing in front of you.

He pushed your hair off your neck and a flash of Klaus' mouth sucking and nibbling on you last night, appeared in your mind. You were definitely covered in marks and hickeys.

"I see you had fun," Elijah muttered, and you saw him look over your appearance, the slight smudged make-up, messy hair and rumpled dress from last night.

He wasn't usually one to judge someone else's life choices, but this was his brother and you. It seemed more personal.

You blushed and pushed your hair back over your shoulder, so his eyes would stop staring at your neck. You needed a cold shower or something, the entire night was still feeling extremely vivid.

"Look Elijah, I'm so sorry, he just caught me at the right moment and I got a little drunk and..." you trailed off, taking a drink of coffee to calm your nerves. You really didn't have any good excuse to give him.

"It's alright, you can be with whoever you choose," Elijah stated in a collected tone.

You frowned and saw him adjusting his cuff-links. A sure sign he was upset. He always did that when he was angry or hiding what he was truly feeling.

"It was just a one time thing," you added, but you felt like he wasn't listening to you anymore.

Elijah was acting strange. Sure he could be an enigma sometimes, but this was different. He looked determined but a little annoyed, and you weren't quite sure how to read the situation. You decided to steer the conversation away from Klaus and what had happened between you two.

"How was your night?" You finally thought to ask. "I saw you leave with a woman, you looked like you were having fun," you said it teasingly, hoping it would lighten up the mood.

But now it was his turn to blush.

"Fine, really. It was fine," he muttered, fixing the already perfect knot in his tie. Now that was definitely something. Elijah rarely ever got tongue tied. "We kissed and I walked her home," he added, his lips pressing together in a firm line.

"That's all? You didn't...well, you know?" You questioned hesitantly.

"One night stands aren't my forte," he replied, giving you a soft smile. "When I take a woman to bed, I make her mine," his words were possessive and he hadn't taken his eyes off you.

The two of you weren't the kind of friends who discussed your sex life with each other. So when he said this, your cheeks turned hot and your imagination went wild. The idea of him holding you down and having his wicked way with you was something you were definitely interested in.

You both were staring at each other, the tension growing by the second. Then you looked away, you couldn't possibly fuck another Mikaelson in the same twelve hour period. Besides, Elijah meant far more to you than Klaus ever could. Sex with him would probably lead you somewhere complicated, and you didn't want to ruin what you had right now.

The situation was way too weird.

"Do you want to hang out tomorrow?" You decided to ask, breaking the silence and steering the conversation away from sex. You just wanted to spend some time with him. "Maybe come up to my place? I don't work the next two days," you added, hopeful he would agree to spend time with you, even though he always did, but this time you felt more nervous about it.

It would help things get back to normal, as normal as they could be after what happened with Klaus.

"Sure, Klaus and Rebekah won't be home tomorrow if you would like to come over here instead?" He suggested, your eyes meeting his again.

He had such an intense way of staring into your eyes, that it almost felt like he was looking into your soul.

"Well, it's your birthday so whatever you would like to do," you stated, giving him a sweet smile.

Your phone buzzed, breaking the moment. You grabbed it from your purse and opened the new text from Klaus:

- I'm available if you ever need something to ride again.

You quickly put down your phone, forgetting you had given him your number. You decided you were going to ignore it. There was no way you were going there again.

Elijah looked curious but didn't press.

"I better go home," you said, finishing your coffee and putting it in the sink.

"See you tomorrow," he replied, stepping closer and giving you gentle kiss on the cheek.

You said bye to him and walked out of the kitchen to the courtyard where Rebekah and Klaus were arguing. They both looked over at you, their argument stopping when they noticed you.

"Hello darling," Klaus greeted, his eyes raking over you. Flashes of your evening together running through your mind, and you quickly looked away from him.

Rebekah looked between the two of you and you could see her trying to figure it out, her eyes widening as she stared at you. You quickly hurried out of the compound before either of them could say another word.

{Part Two}

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jawz · 5 months

Text

i’ve been thinking a lot lately about the way my ethnicity affected the way i was gendered as a child, my drive to transition, and even my detransition…

as a hispanic growing up with my white mom and white stepdad and white brother and white extended family in scandinavian hell (minnesota), i always felt different, always felt wrong. (my parents divorced as a baby, and my dad and his family, cuban and italian, all live in florida.) my neighborhood wasn’t so bad; it was way more diverse than the metro area itself. growing up i had mixed friends, i had friends with curly hair… but us trailer park kids were only a fraction of the population of our schools and district. a sea of blonde hair. there were times in elementary school i would literally pray to god to make my hair straight, make my eyes blue. grown-ups touched my hair and always asked “is it naturally curly?”. my classmates urged me to straighten it and by age 13 it was part of my ridiculously time-consuming “feminizing” beauty rituals.

much earlier, by the age of 8 or 9, i already had thick, dark hair growing on my legs. other kids, boys and girls alike, called me “gorilla girl”, faked gagging when i wore shorts, insisted i was actually a boy. that one became more and more common as i came into my personality: bold, class clown, competitive with the boys. (always wanting to charm the girls, but i didn’t recognize that back then.)

my mustache was there by 8, as well. just a little peach fuzz above my lip but dark enough to notice. are you even a girl? my mom would spread wax over her own face and soon began waxing my stache as well. it hurt so badly. i put up with it because she said it would make the kids stop teasing me. of course i was a girl- she was a woman and she had peach fuzz too!… but i felt self-conscious at the fact that my body hair was so much more noticeable, even as a child. my mother’s hair is very thin, straight, lighter brown; her complexion is warmer than mine, pink where mine is olive, green and yellow. i worried you could see the strands about to burst through. i was worried that to be a girl- a woman- i must hide parts of myself every day. i must cover the shoots of grass, the weeds that reveal that i’m not fit for society, that whisper i’m wild and untamed.

it wasn’t actually until i was 18 at least that i actually started to consider myself latino. i had sometimes said ‘hispanic’ growing up, as that’s what my family in florida called themselves; they referred to themselves as “spanish”, which i found out was not quite true after compiling my family tree and discovering that those ancestors emigrated from havana. in their minds they were white: “descended from spanish royalty” (as if!!)… i had spent my youth constantly trying to claim solely whiteness, confused as to why everyone was asking me “are you mexican?” “are you jewish?” “are you middle eastern?” - even though inside i think i knew. i knew my family didn’t look like me. i resented my surname being changed to Lind when i was five, my stepdad’s name, in order to give me the same name as the rest of them. despite my apparent envy of swedes and norwegians i knew it wasn’t my name; i still stood out terribly. i glared at myself in the mirror every day, i never could move past how the kids at school said my eyes were the color of shit, that my hair looked like pubes, that i must have had a sex change without being told because that would explain the mustache, the aggression…

by the time i was fourteen i was entirely primed to accept an alternative explanation to what was “wrong” with me. my sexuality was becoming more and more apparent but before i could ever come out as lesbian or even bi, i had discovered what it meant to be trans. i was so immediately certain that this was the key, THIS was why everyone said i didn’t fit in, THIS was why my behavior wasn’t girly, THIS was why i wanted to date girls. it was 2011, still deep in the “brain sex” era of the trans community, and i was sure without a shadow of a doubt that i was physically female, mentally male. all that needed to be done was to “correct” my body and bring it in line with my brain. despite the fact that very few people knew what transition actually was back then, i genuinely assumed it would make sense to everyone else, too: they had told me i wasn’t ‘really’ a girl so many times i had no trouble believing it.

transition, of course, did not suddenly de-latinize me LOL. first i became a total Other, outside of both the minnesotan ethnic norms and the gender+sex norms; eventually, with hormones and surgery at a very young age, i was able to pass as a boy, but by the time i could grow actual full-on facial hair, i realized i was still the pan-latin american enigma to people around me. multiple times someone would call me “sanchez” as some sort of attempted insult or joke. police looked at me differently than they had before. shop owners followed me, accused me of shoplifting. and sometimes, the white girls i dated told me that i was way cooler than all the boring white boys they knew. one girl even called me “exotic” to my face. it was, apparently, a compliment.

when i was 21 i heard that my girlfriend had referred to me to others as “a POC who identifies as white”. it felt as though she didn’t even know me at all. i’d never claimed either of those things to her.

moving to the west coast (socal specifically, where being latino/a is not considered ‘abnormal’) illuminated a lot of the bizarre and unnatural racial expectations of my midwest upbringing; i think by this point i was beginning to realize what so many things from my childhood had meant. that they weren’t really saying i was a boy. they were saying we don’t like girls who look like you, and we’d rather not have you included in our category.

it took me another three years to fully reckon with this. by the time i decided to detransition i had a much better understanding of the circumstances of my life; conversations with close friends who are also latina and have walked similar paths to me, heard similar insults, similar “compliments”, opened my eyes to the fact that i was not alone. i no longer feel weird for thinking the race/ethnicity boxes on government forms are hopelessly reductive. i know who i am and who i am not.

(around this time, i happened upon some old pictures of my dad’s side of the family. beautiful and glamorous women: adela, my uncle’s mother, the piano player; melanie, my aunt, the wife, hostess, and addict; lauren and andrea, my cousins, the restauranteurs; stella, my dad’s mamma, the widow and matriarch. and on all their faces, thick dark eyebrows, and, yes, that ever-familiar peach fuzz. i swear it healed something in my soul. despite my lack of beauty and glamor, we are not so different after all.)

that’s not to say all things are easy now. i’ve spent three years living as a GNC woman and if that wasn’t enough to confirm most all of my hypotheses on people’s perceptions of me, i don’t know what is.

detrans spaces (like most trans spaces) are overwhelmingly white- or at least that’s who dominates conversation. i see SO much downplaying of the things that naturally hairy women go through societally. i see trans allies who purport to be “okay” with detransitioners, saying “what’s the big deal? if you took testosterone you can just go off it and get laser hair removal!! :)” as if laser isn’t expensive as hell, painful as hell, and also WAY more of a process for a woman with dark curly hair than it is for one with straight blonde hair lmfao!!! i see detrans women obsessed with removing all traces of hair from their bodies (even though most of them clearly don’t have a neverending five o’clock shadow like some of us do! my lower face has a constant blue-green disturbance under the surface which makes female spaces incredibly daunting) and insulting the rest of us for being ugly and hairy and making no effort to look like women or what the fuck ever. basically, a lot of people who claim to support us are just racists and essentialists and believe that sex is visual and not biological…🤨

anyway… i guess my main takeaways from all this are:

1. please stop acting like detransition is an entirely internal process and that it’s easy for all of us to be seen as our sex again (some of us like. actually transitioned and passed as the opposite sex), or that potential physical interventions aren’t incredibly invasive and difficult

2. stop assuming all transition and detransition journeys follow your own experience of lifelong whiteness and hairlessness

3. it is a distinct experience to be regularly de-gendered or denied your sex, PRIOR to ever thinking of yourself as literally trans. many trans/detrans people had this happen to us (we were once the vast majority of trans people). but many did not, and generally shock others when they begun breaking gender norms. i really think people from the second group often have trouble understanding that for the first group, changing gender expression is basically a bandaid over an abscess… we have lived entire lifetimes being denied our sex, being told our bodies are not “truly” ours, that there is someone else inside trying to break out. kicked out of the bathroom, the changing room, alienated from single-sex peer groups. transition just flips this experience and instead separates us from our preferred gender group, reinforcing the feeling that we have no place, anywhere.

race/ethnicity, being homosexual or bisexual, mental illness stigma, disability, and low economic class all play an additional role in this. stop perpetuating this and denying us our biological sex.

#this is a toooootal rant lmao sorry but its been on my mind for a while.#kind of a culmination of two posts ive been wanting to make #detrans #detransition #ok to reblog

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spamgyu · 6 months

Text

Always // Soonyoung x Reader - bonus part

DESCRIPTION: When Soonyoung told her he would always be there, he meant it. The days of pining for the girl he had fallen for freshman year had finally paid off.

PAIRING: Soonyoung x Reader

GENRE: A little fluff treat for my team soonyoung girlies out there.

Sorry for making yall cry in right where you left me. <3

(ALWAYS)

He kept his promise.

That night when he had confessed his feelings to her, he truly meant what he said.

"I'm here. As a friend or whatever you need me to be. I'm here."

Soonyoung didn't care if he was the second choice or the twelveth – he remained by y/n side. He was the first person she called when anything happened; whether it was when Mingyu and her broke it off or when she finally found the sold out bag from Marge Sherwood. Soonyoung was the first to know.

He had become her best friend. Over throwing Jeonghan.

Though, if anyone were to ask y/n, it wasn't the case... Only because Jeonghan would make a scene, claiming that after all the years they have known each other he would be dethroned by someone he had introduced her to.

Many called him a fool for this choice – pining for a girl who was clearly not going to give him the time of day. But Soonyoung didn't care.

Because despite what everyone thought, he wasn't praying for her and Mingyu's downfall so that he could finally get the girl.

As long as she was happy.

He'd get over it one day.

But that was the thing, just when he thought his feelings for her were slowly diminishing, welcoming the idea of possibly dating... there was a glimmer of hope.

"Sorry I'm late, got caught up at the office." He apologized to his friends, taking the only empty seat available.

Next to an intoxicated y/n.

"Catch up!" She messily poured a shot of soju for him, earning hoots and hollers from the other two sat across the table – Jeonghan and Seokmin.

Soonyoung happily took the small glass from the girl's hand with a chuckle – throwing the drink back with ease.

"Okay you need about four more." She began to pour another only to be stopped by Soonyoung's hand. "Boo!!"

"It's only been an hour since you guys got here, how are you all so drunk?" He grabbed the pitcher of beer from the middle of the table.

"We're celebrating the end of a work week." Seokmin snickered.

"That I'll I drink to." He sighed; recalling to the emails, that seemed to never end, that he had to send throughout the week. Not to mention the outburst his team leader had on Tuesday.

To say the week ran him over like a semi-truck was an understatement.

Being part of the corporate world was no joke, each one of them taking turns complaining about their bosses and deadlines in their groupchats.

Who would have thought the real world would be this draining?

It had almost been a weekly ritual for them to meet every Friday for Happy Hour, whether as a semi-complete group or as a whole. It was their own way of tapping back to their hey-days in the midst of their now very grown lives.

"Take my glass." Y/n handed him her empty pint glass as she watched him look for a clean one.

"You're not gonna–"

She shook her head. "I'm getting the burps."

"Do you want another drink? I'll pay."

"They do have ice blended makgeolli." Y/n trailed off, a smile on her face growing – recalling to the menu that was handed to them when they were seated.

It wasn't part of the pub's happy hour menu – the three opting for the bottomless pitcher of beer and four bottle of soju special instead.

But since he had offered... she wasn't going to decline.

Soonyoung called over the waiter, motioning for her to place her order once he arrived at the table.

"One ice blended yogurt makgeolli–"

"Four." He interjected, knowing that the other two would whine about wanting some the minute it arrived at the table.

"Four, please."

"Must be nice having a finance bro as a boyfriend." Jeonghan sighed loudly, earning a laugh from Seokmin. He had been observing the two from across the table as they seemed to be in their own little world. Again.

She and Soonyoung have gotten used to Jeonghan's teasing, paying no mind to his comment. It had been a running joke for him since y/n and Mingyu had broken up – joking any time he caught either Soonyoung or y/n doting on one another.

It was just a joke, anyways.

"Han, please you're scaring the hoes." Soonyoung replied without missing a beat.

"Oh please, y/n is doing enough of that herself." Seokmin laughed.

It was no secret that the two had gotten very close – effortlessly navigating around one another like an old couple. They knew each other better than they knew themselves.

Soonyoung knew what made her tick, her coffee order, her favorite places to shop, and so on.

And she was the same.

Anyone could easily mistake the two as a long term couple, making the jokes from their group so easy to come.

"As if he has any." Y/n rolled her eyes.

"Because you scare them away!" Soonyoung laughed.

One iced blended makgeolli turned into three more and soon the group, aside for Soonyoung, were absolutely wasted; drunkenly singing along to the music that blasted throughout the pub. Earning looks from those sat around them.

"Alright, I think it's time to call it." Soonyoung placed two one hundred bills on the table. "I'm taking y/n home."

"I'm-" Hiccup. "Fine."

"No you're not, come on let's go." He chuckled standing from his seat, grabbing her oversized leather jacket that hung on the back of her chair along with her purse – holding out his hand.

"Boring!!!" Seokmin protested. Slurred to be exact.

He raised his brows at his friend, turning to a more coherent Jeonghan. "Are you guys good to make it home or do I need to call an uber too?"

"No, we're okay." Jeonghan shook his head slowly.

Soonyoung knew they weren't okay, but he was far too worried about the girl who was still sat in her seat – sipping on the watered down drink in front of her.

He nodded, reaching to take the drink from her hand; earning a pout before she took his hand; using it to help her up.

"Whoa." Y/n's eyes grew wide, feeling all the alcohol she had consumed take over her whole body.

Soongyoung stifled a laugh, holding her hand tighter as he felt her sway as she tried to find her balance.

"Request me on zelle if that doesn't cover it." He nodded to the two before exiting the building and straight into the uber he had requested minutes ago.

The second her and Seokmin began passing their make shift soju and spoon mic, he had secretly requested for a ride out of the establishment. He knew if he had waited any longer, y/n would have probably ordered another round for the group.

It was a short ride from the pub to her apartment, the two sitting in the back of the SUV in silence.

Mostly because he knew she was on the verge of throwing up.

Y/n could handle her alcohol pretty well. She just needed to throw up after each night out.

Nothing out of the ordinary.

Y/n threw her body on her couch, groaning as her head hit the throw pillow. "I did pretty good. Didn't puke once."

"I'm so proud of you." He chuckled, unzipping her knee high boots. "Want to keep your socks on?"

"Please."

"Water?"

She shook her head. Her stomach was filled to the brim with liquids and she knew that if she took even a sip, she may just burst.

He watched as she remained laying still in a fetal position, admiring her beauty. She wasn't do anything but breathing. Yet somehow, he couldn't help but feel his heart fill with warmth as he scanned her – her hair perfectly framing her face, despite the fact that the curls she spent nearly an hour this morning doing had fallen, her make up was still in it's place, aside from her now faded lipstick. She looked perfect as ever.

Though, he may be biased.

Soonyoung took one last look at her before walking into her room to grab a hoodie from her closet. "Sit up."

He didn't have to ask twice, allowing him to assist her put on the black hoodie. Her favorite piece to wear when she was simply lounging around her apartment or running errands.

His hoodie from the day he rescued her in the rain.

She never did return it.

...And he never asked for it back.

"Maybe I am scaring your hoes away." She hiccuped, her eyes trained on his face as he adjusted the strings.

"I don't have hoes. I was kidding."

Maybe it was the alcohol.

Or maybe it was the close proximity.

But y/n found herself replying. "Good."

"Good?" He raised his brows, absentmindedly tucking the strands that fell in front of her face behind her ears.

She hated when her hair was a mess.

"I don't like sharing."

He felt his heart skip a beat.

Y/n had never vocalized how she felt about him; and up until now, he never though she would ever. Soonyoung began to have some sort of inkling a few months ago that she may have felt the same way he does, but he never wanted to read too much into this.

Y/n had been newly single and maybe she could have just been projecting her old lingering feelings for his best friend towards him.

Besides, she was like this with Jeonghan. At least, that's what he chose to believe.

"You're really drunk." He mumbled.

"Is it so bad that I have feelings for you?"

He felt like the air in his lungs was not enough; unable to fully process her sudden confession of feelings. "N-no. But you're also about eight drinks in."

"Drunk mind is an honest one."

She was right.

As much as he had waited for this moment, which only seemed possible in his dreams, he knew it wasn't right. She was drunk and though he was coherent, he too had a slight buzz.

Soonyoung wanted to be sober when they had this conversation.

"We'll talk about this tomorrow. During breakfast."

"Do you not believe me?" She pressed.

Ninety percent of him does.

The ten percent was his demons, telling him that he would never hold a place in her heart. Not the way Mingyu did.

While he crouched in front of her in silence, trying to silence the voice in his head; he noticed her inching closer – her eyes eyeing his lips. For a split second, he allowed himself to lean in; capturing her lips.

This was their first kiss, and as much as he has been waiting for this – it felt wrong. He didn't picture the first time he kissed the girl he had been in love with for almost six years to be in her living room while she was most likely drunk out of her mind.

Not like this.

It was quick kiss, and god did they both want it to last longer.

"Tomorrow." He breathed, placing a kiss on her forehead. "I promise."

Y/n didn't care to protest anymore, knowing that he wasn't going to change his answer and allowed him to tuck her into bed.

She may be drunk, but she wasn't out of her mind. The alcohol had simply gave her the confidence to finally say what had been plaguing her mind for the past month and half.

A secret she had only disclosed to Jeonghan. Who seemed to be very thrilled of the news – claiming that the reason why he had introduced her to his frat brothers during their freshman year was because he fully expected her to hit it off with Soonyoung.

Not with Mingyu.

He had spent the last month and a half encouraging her to finally let Soonyoung know how she felt. Annoying her to be exact.

Everyone had called that somehow and at some point, she would end up falling for Soonyoung.

She couldn't pin point the exact moment when she began to allow her heart to soften to the idea of possibly seeing a future with her friend.

The one moment in her apartment while she was still dating Mingyu didn't count.

It happened so slowly that y/n did not realize that she began to yearn for his presence. He had become a part of her daily life that when he had gone away for an overseas vacation with his family, she realized how much she had missed having him blowing up her phone with all sorts of random messages and memes.

Not that he wasn't texting her while he was away; no he made sure to keep her updated. Sending her images of the activities they were doing and all the meals was eating – and she was doing the same.

It was just that, due to the time difference and lack of proper cell service, he wasn't able to reply right away.

The minute she caught herself constantly checking her phone, to see if his name had popped up in her notifications, she knew she was done for.

The inevitable had finally come and she was fully welcoming it.

He knew he didn't have to ask for permission. Especially not if it was Mingyu that ended things.

Yet, there he was, standing at his best friend's apartment door – nervously shifting his weight from one leg to another, debating whether he had made the right choice or not.

Soonyoung's head had been a mess since he left y/n's apartment, unable to complete a single thought.

All except one. He needed to make things right, starting by giving Mingyu a heads up.

If what she had said was true, he wanted to start their relationship properly.

He knew he had already overstepped the rules of the bro code; that line was far in the distance, he could no longer see it. And despite the anger he once felt for his friend, for making the girl he loves cry and breaking her heart, he didn't want to cause any ill feelings that could possibly bring tension to the whole group.

He cared far too much for the twelve boys he had spent all his college days with. A girl nearly ruined their dynamics once, he wasn't going to allow this to happen again.

Especially if he could help it.

He was willing to let go anyways. If Mingyu says no, he'll walk away.

It would be painful as hell, but he didn't care. A simple no and he would do it in a heartbeat.

Finally mustering up the courage to knock on the door, Soonyoung reached up to unbutton another button from his white collared shirt – the sounds of Mingyu's footstep approaching the door all of a sudden made him feel as though the fabric around his neck was constricting him.

"Hey, Hosh." He greeted, almost sounding like a question.

Soonyoung cleared his throat.

Here goes nothing.

"I'm not asking for permission, I think we're too grown for that but– it's been a year and you're okay and she's okay a–and–" He stammered. He was far more nervous than he had expected himself to be.

"Spit it out, dude." Mingyu chuckled.

"I'm going to try it out with y/n." Soonyoung blurted.

Mingyu blinked. "That's it?"

That was not the reaction he expected.

Y/n had always been a touchy subject between the two. Especially after that night at the gym when he nearly landed a fist on Mingyu's face.

The two avoided any topic that involved y/n. Not unless someone else in the group brought it up.

"Well, yeah– you're my best friend and she's your ex–"

Mingyu shook his head. "Like you said. We're adults. Do what makes you happy, man."

He felt like the weight on his shoulder has been lifted, a smile forming on his lips. "Thank you, dude. It really means a lot."

"I guess this is me passing the baton." Mingyu joked. "Don't fuck it up."

"Trust me, I won't." Soonyoung chuckled, feeling at ease that his friend was able to make a joke out of the situation. He was fully prepared for Mingyu to put up a fight, or at least give him a hard time.

But then again, he was dating again; having brought a girl around when they went out as a group for Seungcheol's birthday.

Unlike the previous time Mingyu had done this, he noticed that y/n had barely bat an eye at his actions.

Things had shifted.

War was over.

Soonyoung had let himself in to her apartment, grateful for the spare key she had given him when she had first moved in.

Just like all his other promises to her, he kept his word and showed up the following day to her place; ready to pick up where they had left off the night before. This time fully sober.

He had felt like he had been floating on cloud nine since last night and was not able to sleep since coming home from Mingyu's apartment. He had gotten the greenlight from both parties and now it was his time to make a move.

Soonyoung had always respected y/n, he could have easily jumped the gun the second she was single but he knew that would have been a dirty move. He knew what his friends and her friends said about him, and he didn't want to prove those rumors true.

Four years with someone was a long time, and he knew there was no way he could erase that. Soonyoung knew that if he did stand a chance in capturing her heart, it would be when y/n was fully healed from all the pain and heartache that her previous relationship has brought her.

And he waited.

Not intentionally.

He enjoyed staying right by her side with no return in his investment.

It just so happened that she managed to fall for him during this time.

He quietly began setting up her small dining table with her favorite breakfast from the restaurant they had become regulars at when they needed to nurse their hangovers.

Cinnamon french toast and lavender iced latte.

He was in the middle of filling the pink vase he had purchased along with the bouquet of white peonies when he heard the hard wood behind him creak – signaling that she had woken up.

"Morning." She croaked, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand.

"No, no. Go back to your room." He turned his head to face her.

"Wha- no!" She laughed, trying to peer over his shoulder to see what he was up to.

"I'm trying to make a grand romantic gesture here." Soonyoung cried, moving his body to hide the flowers.

"Are those flowers?"

"Can't a guy surprise the girl he likes?" He reached to turn the tap off.

"Not when he's making so much noise!"

"I was being quiet!"

"Please, that word is not even in your dictionary. I heard you stub your toe the second you walked in."

"Who puts a fucking cabinet at the entry way!?"

"It's a shoe cabinet and you have been here so many times you still– Oh my god it's so pretty!" She gasped when he fully turned around, walking over to place the vase in the middle of the table.

Soonyoung was taken by surprise when he felt her arms wrap around his waist; feeling her warm body press up against him. It wasn't that he had never hugged her, nor have they never done this before – having been a little too clingy with one another over the past few years.

They've had their fair shares of unconscious cuddling on her couch, hand holding, and lingering hugs.

But this time it was different.

He now knows that her feelings for him was mutual, and somehow he had become very aware of her touch; feeling his cheeks grow hot.

"Thank you." She smiled up at him as he turned his head to meet her gaze.

"Did you mean what you said last night?" He asked.

"Ask one more time, and I'm taking it back."

"I was just making sure so that I could do this." Soonyoung moved his body to face her, leaning down to press a kiss on her lips – smiling instantly when he felt her melt against his touch.

"That was nice."

"We can keep kissing." He said quickly.

Y/n threw her head back and laughed, playfully hitting his chest. "You're dumb."

"You fell for it."

"Yeah, don't make me regret it."

"I'll fill this whole place with flowers, don't threaten me." He shook his finger at her. "You'll be coughing petals until you die."

"I know that was supposed to be romantic, but I'm scared."

Over time, she had learned to keep up with his jokes; almost as if they had become the same person. She had soon become quick to jump along with his bits and humor, at times egging him on.

Seungkwan's worst nightmare.

He rolled his eyes. "You're annoying."

"You fell for it."

"Yeah." He hummed happily. "Let's eat?"

The two happily ate their breakfast, welcoming the new change in the air between them. They have shared meals alone together countless times, this was nothing new.

But the unspoken words that they had yet to discuss had all of a sudden made them feel as though they were two young high schoolers who were left alone with their crush for the very first time.

In the midst of their meal, y/n couldn't help but catch him staring at her – trying her best to calm the butterflies that caused a riot in her stomach. Something that had been happening quiet often in the past month that she had been around him. But of course, this time, they seemed to have multiplied.

"Hey," Soonyoung reached over to place a hand over hers, halting her movement. "I haven't said it in a while but, always okay?"

Always had been their word to each other. It started off as a playful joke, telling each other that they would be there to always be annoying, be the butt of the joke, be there to accompany each other to any mindless errands....

It had been a minute since she had heard him say it, taking her back to the days when she had felt low and he had been there to rescue the day; bringing light into her dark days.

She tilted her head to the side. "Huh?"

"I'm always going to be here."

"I never doubted you one bit."

And it was true.

here hasn't been a day that Soonyoung had missed a call, text, or special day of hers – whether this was something minor like finally finding the Sonny Angel she had been on the hunt for or finally securing a job at the PR company she had been working so hard to interview for.

He had always been there and there was not a single ounce of doubt in her body that he would miss any in the future.

In all the mess going on around in her world, he was her only constant.

"I'm just reassuring you."

"Thank you."

tag list: @leah-rose03 @yoonzinuhh @musingsofananxiouspotato @woofie-nctzen-fanarts @hanniebanggi

«« [an]

hi friends, thank you so so so much for the love and feedback for the last two parts of the always!au.

always was meant to just be all pain and heartache but i feel like i owe my team hoshi girlies some fluff. <;3

i'm currently working on one LAST installation to this au and then i promise i'll have other painful au in line. lol

#seventeen fic #seventeen #hoshi #kwon soonyoung #kwon soonyoung x reader #hoshi x reader #hoshi x you #hoshi x y/n #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #hoshi fluff #hoshi scenarios #hoshi fic #soonyoung x reader #soonyoung fluff

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elsfleur · 1 year

Text

⋆·˚ ༘ * COOL ABOUT IT - PART TWO

ellie williams x reader

summary: it was an odd thing to enjoy your work, but with a passion for music and a fling with your coworker the days at the record store seemed bright, until of course you meet her girlfriend.

content warning: i guess it’s angsty, very filthy smut with sub!ellie and dom!reader, mentions of cheating and bad self image, implies of degradation, mentions of masturbation

word count: 1,749 and previous part here

📼 ʾ ⠀

she would come to you in dreams, pale green eyes pointed at you like a weapon, body soft as a menace, reach out towards your face and in tenderness you’d surrender as though you never meant to have walked away in the first place. you’d wake up panting the nights you’d forgive her, you’d shower away the disgust the nights you thought to have felt her tongue– traitor was a dramatic word, but your heart claimed it as ellie’s synonym.

work had become insufferable but you grew into an astoundingly good employee, never at the break room as to not encourage ellie into a conversation, constantly roaming around and chatting up clients with entire discography conversations going as far as escorting them to their car in odd fashion, you appeared sparkling and every glance of your shine that reached ellie’s senses immediately sent her skin on fire. she had been miserable and lazy, escaping from her thoughts only through deafening music as to drown out the distance between you, you too a constant in her nightly affairs, forgiving, beautiful, near.

she melted into the couch imagining it your embrace, let the melody transport her into better times, hated herself for replacing her songs with your laugh as a favourite track, for indulging in temptation through entirely wrong means. she thought herself a symptom of disease, wreckening plague in the lives of those she cherished that once established could only widespread devastation. the idea that perhaps keeping you casual and secret would make it unknown to the universe and therefore not give it the power to ruin it was stupid, once she fully thought it out, but it had been comforting. allowing your affection to fill in the broken cracks of her being as though glueing them together was a sensation she knew selfishly not deserved but craved as a drug addict. you thought she called you her angel as a bit, but she felt it pulsing through her veins.

tears prickled her eyes for the eleventh time that shift, heavy metal not enough. turning the volume down her body rolled sideways and she begged it into slumber for moments of peace.

“wake the fuck up williams we’re mid shift” you cursed taking hold of her headphones and tossing them aside rather agressively, the girl immediately stood up overwhelmed, a scoff being her immediate response to your turned back heading out the room.

“what the fuck? you haven’t spoken to me for fucking weeks those are the first words you say to me since you left this place before i could even explain anything and you just go walking away again?”

“jesus christ, i’m sorry someone woke up cranky from their midday nap but what the fuck else do you even want me to say? oh right i’m sorry, how about how’s your girlfriend?”

“we broke up” ellie stated simply before interruption.

“great! and i suppose you want me to run into your arms straight into a sunset beach now while it rains unicorns and rainbows, isn’t that right?”

“oh my god you are the most insufferable human being i have ever met! i fucking hate you and i hate the way every time we walk to work together you have to stop and pick out a flower at every single bush we walk by and if i don’t put it behind my ear your feelings gets hurt and you have the goofiest smile making fun of me, and i hate the stupid witchy herbs you make me ruin my weed with that makes it taste so girly and like you and i hate the way my mouth memorized your fucking lipgloss to the point i can’t do anything without feeling you on my lips and it drives me fucking insane, i hate your frilly little love songs that only start sounding not so bad by the hundredth listen and i hate that i fucking know the lyrics to taylor swift now and you made me relate to them! i hate your smile and i hate that fruity perfume you wear that always gets stuck to my clothes and i hate the way you looked at me like i’m a good person to the point i almost believed you for a second and and i hate your lame ass sense of humour and how you’re the only one who laughs at my fucking jokes and god worst of all i hate the way i can’t even begin to hate you at all!”

you opened your mouth to reply though not quite sure what words would escape you, but she was quicker, pacing around and heightening her tone in complete desperation that cracked knuckles in soothing.

“no and you know what? yes i fucked up and i cheated on my three year relationship but we were fucking done! we have been done for years! and we haven’t been more done since the day i first laid eyes on you and thought this girl is going to fucking ruin my life! i am worse than a cheater, yes, i’m a coward! because guess what angel, it has always been you. god, it probably has been you since before i even knew you existed and you don’t understand how insane it is to say this because you’re the one who believes the whole soulmate bullshit! i’m a mess and i’m fucked up and i’m too much and still not enough and-“

“ellie” you called out, her eyes finally meeting your own as you felt immersed in the same light green dreams you have ferociously tried to escape from, the pink lips you knew so intimately quivering at your stare as though taunting you to kiss its fear away, you had heard enough for an answer “kneel.”

“what, do you want me to beg for your forgiveness now?” ellie asked ironic though her legs were compliant, lowering themselves till she fell on her knees, running a hand through her messy hair to keep it from falling on her face staring up at you in clear shot.

“take off your shirt” you demanded, watching intently as she lifted up her arms to remove the fabric obeying though deeply confused, her cheeks flushing red with the attention, eyes drifting everywhere except for your face until your hand found the edge of her chin and forced it up to meet your eye “you’ve done enough talking”

“i fucking hate that you lied to me” you started impossibly close to her face “i hate the way you ruined this job for me, i hate that i can’t look at you without feeling sick with desire like a desperate whore pulsating at flashes of skin, i hate that i’m so used to moaning your name that you may aswell have ruined sex for me aswell, and i fucking hate how your little girlfriend kissed you infront of me and doesn’t even know your mouth was sucking on me minutes earlier, take off your pants”

she slowly rose up to detach herself from the jeans squeezing her figure, only to be pushed back down once fully rid of them back onto the ground, you weren’t finished.

“i hate that i can see how wet you are right now, i hate that you have made it so i feel disgusted to touch you, i hate that i still want to do it so fucking bad as if your moans in my ear would erase your dumb mistakes from my memory. just a question, were you fucking her when you were with me too? nevermind that’s silly, of course you were, unless you spent six months making her believe you have gone celibate-“

ellie shook her head hard, gulping down “n-no i didn’t, i told you angel it was a façade relationship all i wanted-“

“shut up. touch yourself” you ordered as she slid a hand under her underwear, lightly rubbing on her clit and silencing own whimpers through biting down her lip “i hate that i have to ask myself if she made you feel good like i did, if she knows your whole dominant archetype is actually just hiding a brat who wanted to be ordered around and fucked so bad, right els? did she get you on her knees for her too, touching yourself to the thought of her before she even took off her clothes? or am i just special?”

“angel” ellie moaned out, inserting a finger into herself.

“does she know about the freckles on your hipbone that look like the gemini constellation? did she see the bite mark i left there last time we fucked? does she know you like it when i spell my name on your pussy with my tongue, has she tried it? do you remember what it feels like to be inside me as opposed to her, remember begging to add more fingers so you could feel my walls closing in on you, remember staying inside even after i came because you wanted to feel the warmth around you, was she warm for you, ellie?” you asked, warm breath hitting her face like a makeout.

“angel, please” she begged embarrassingly.

“please what? use your fucking words since you wanted to have the last one so fucking bad”

“please fuck me” ellie moaned out arching her back with a gasp as you easily slid one of your own fingers inside her alongside hers, the sounds of wetness with your every thrust bordering filthy.

“i hate that i can’t fucking stop dreaming about you, that you’re so fucking wet for me you’re drenched, that i’m thinking after all this making me an idiot i shouldn’t let you cum, how’s that?” you asked curling your fingers inside her which lead to a near pornographic moan escaping past her lips and an aggressive head shook to your words “i hate your stupid lake eyes and how they shine like galaxies, i hate the way you hold my hand to cross the street because you know i get distracted, i hate the way you effortlessly played my favourite song on the guitar although you claimed before to not like it, i hate how badly i want to fuck the attitude out of you until my heart stops hurting about this”

“i’m sorry, my angel, i’m so sorry” she croaked out whimpering, swaying her hips for friction with your fingers every movement making it harder to keep a cleared mind, dizzy in desire “fuck, i’m here now please please let me show you i can be good i want to be yours”

“want?” you chuckled removing your fingers and shoving them by her mouth so she’d taste herself on them, sucking slowly “you are mine, ellie. i just haven’t decided if i’m yours”

#ellie williams x reader #ellie x reader #ellie williams #the last of us #ellie williams fanfic #the last of us fanfiction #ellie x fem reader #lesbian #ellie williams smut #ellie williams angst #elsfleur

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rinbowaman · 7 months

Note

HI REINAA!! sorry if im bothering you since ur busy w the series fics!! But i would really want to req another fic of sunoo hahaha. So reader is 8th member and pleeeaaadseee make it rlyy smutty!! It could be where yn teases sunoo during dinner and he gets hard then... but plsss make sunoo a sub in this thanks <3 (Fyi ur literally the best writer ever idk how u manage to write these so descriptively and managing to make me feel things LMAOO the other accs i follow wont reply my asks ☠️) thanks alot like alooottttttttt though!! <33

”Sunoo Baby.”

part 2 of “Ddeonu”.

Warnings: Sub/switch!Sunoo, Dom!Reader, unprotected smut, creampie smut, oral (both male and female receiving, demeaning behavior, submissive demands, ball tapping (you already know...), whining, hair pulling, smut dialogue, reverse psychology (not really but i dont know what else to call it.....you'll see what i mean) if you squint, there's a breeding kink....i think that's it.

You and the boys decide to grab a bit at a local hot pot eatery. No one knew of the event that unfolded the week prior of you and Sunoo's 'talk', and believe you, there were many more that followed suit.

.................................

"Look at how cute you look when you take in so much muscle."

"You look so cute when you cry."

"Get up, cutie."

..................................

You had to admit, Sunoo opening up and becoming fond of you allowed for a whole new version of yourself to rise. You loved his sassy and demeaning manners, the way he called you 'cute' and revealing how the more feminine side of your nature was something he had been wanting to see ever since the group had debuted. You felt a weight lift off your shoulders once you realized that all it took was for you to lighten up on your tomboyish persona, and be...well, a girl, for once.

But now you were comfortable. You gained closure and have little reason to expose that girlish nature, such as crying in the middle of the night, all because you thought a certain someone didn't like you. Well you were partially right, there was definitely a dislike, but it wasn't you, just your lack of girly attributes, and the reluctant hesitancy of doing what is the most commonly, demanding act in the industry, the 'ayego's.

Throughout dinner, you observed the way his sharp eyes flickered back and forth between black and hazel under the heat lamp. He was so beautiful. He told you of how important it was to not let anyone know of the secret love affairs that had been ongoing, so naturally that only meant he had to play the part well in acting out as a very nonchalant bastard. Trust you to say, he played the part well.

He'd glance over from time to time, even winking while everyone was nose deep in the menu's, but for some reason, you weren't feeling terribly satisfied. Sure it was nice for him to 'like' you now. One could even say that he cared a great deal for you, considering what he's said to you in bed. But there was something about him that you had wanted to pin down and crush; you're not exactly sure why, but now that there was closure between you two, you felt the need to establish yourself as the equal, especially since he caught you crying.

You ignored his advances, and even rolled your eyes at one point. He took note of your rather obscured behavior, and furrowed his brows in worry when no one was looking. You flared a side shoulder hunch while looking at him directly, mouthing the whispered words of "I'm going to destroy you."

Now Sunoo had an attitude of his own, but there was something rather peculiar when it came to someone matching his level. It's never happened before, yet he had to say, he was kind of digging it. He reaches below the table to gently tap his fingers along your kneecap, only for you to slap his hand way so roughly. Wincing slightly, he nearly gasps after witnessing your response to his touch.

"How could she?...."

He reiterates his action, only for yo to repeat your previous response and slap his hand away once more. Confused, Sunoo couldn't tell if he should have been offended or desired more of whatever game it was you were playing at. Something told him that it was the latter, and that 'something' was hardening under his trousers.

"Oh God..." he whispered under his breath, trying to shake his legs out strategically without anyone noticing. Nothing helped, even the cold ice water that he had 'accidently' dropped on his lap. The car ride home had to be the longest drive he felt in so long...

Once you all got back to the dorm, you bid goodnight and head to your room. Everyone else did the same, and went to sleep with fully tummies. Sunoo, on the other hand, was still hungry, and the way you had been treating him at dinner, he was famished.

Knocking on your door, he enters. "What's up with you? What was up with dinner?"

"Never mind. I'm going to bed."

"Why are you being so---"

"So what?....Cute?" you scoffed out as you raised a brow his way. "I'm glad we got to clarify our feelings, I just wish you could embrace my tomboy-ish ways just as you can with my feminine manners."

Sunoo gulps down a lump of saliva. "Well then...show me."

"What?"

"I got a taste of it at dinner...and....not gonna lie, I kind of want more." he admits, side-eyeing the wall out of embarassment. You never saw him this way, but considering he's loved on you for over a week now, maybe he really did see the light in all of your attributes, to include your non-girlish ones. Just to be sure, you put it to the test.

"Come here." you speak out in a rather high pitched, yet demanding tone. And just as you had suspected, he did exactly what you commanded. "Too easy..."

Grabbing onto his copper red hair, you pull his head back and expose that delicate throat of his. He gasps out with a masculine moan, yet it was as sweet as fruit nectar. You stick your lips onto the soft spot, and sucked profusely, just until a nice mark was left. "My territory." you exclaimed. You thought he would have bit back, yet you were somewhat surprised when he breathed out heavily and bid you to, "do more."

That was all he needed to say, and the tomboy sense in you reacted by pushing him down on your bedspread. You crawl atop of his broad frame, and perched yourself nicely on his groin. He whimpers out in feeling your pelvis grind against his sensitive member. "Aww...what a sweet face." you remark as you drag your finger down his cheek. You stand back up and with your arms crossed, you tell him to undress you...with his mouth.

You guide him with your words to start from the top, and work his way down. He removes your blouse, by kissing your belly button and grabbing hold of the material with his teeth, dragging it upward as he finishes in removing it. Your bra came off immediately after; your jeans were already removed before he entered your room, leaving only your panties remaining. Aiming to remove the last piece of cloth on your body, you tell him to...

"Get on all fours and take it off with your tongue."

He looks up rather bewildered and shocked, his eyes wide with a sense of wonderment. Nodding, he feeds his tongue in between where the cloth meets the plush lips that cradles your opening. God, it felt so good to feel that slick muscle squirming through, finding leverage to pull the material down.

Once he managed to find a way, he drags your underwear down your legs, the flat surface of his tongue grazes against the skin of your inner thighs and calves. Fully removed with you bare, you push him back down made haste as you crawled back on top, only this time, you didn't settle for his groin.

"Clean me real good."

Sitting on his face, his nose rubs the bud of your clitoris while his tongue shoves its way into your opening. He loops his hands up and over your thighs, grabbing hold of your derriere. You could tell by the way he slapped his palms on the cheeks, he was starving for you. You grab the front pieces of his hair and buried his face in deeper as you grind away, riding his tongue with a waving motion that made ocean water look stale.

"Oh my God! Keep going! Don't--don't stop! Don't fucking stop!"

You incorporate a slight bouncing motion as you felt his tongue thrusting in and out. You reach behind and pin his hands onto your lower back, continuously coasting his mouth, leaving him no chance to rest.

"Oh fuck I'm going to cum!" you whimpered out as you glazed his entire face. He licks it up, starting with soft and tiny licks, resembling a puppy. "Lick it all up for me." you tell him, at that point the slight bit of his dominant side comes out, the side you were familiar with. You watched as he narrows his eyes, watching how the puppy grew into a fox and emitted harsh, long licks from top to bottom.

You adjusted your position and became parallel to his frame. Grabbing hold at the base of his shaft, you whipped his length around, tapping it roughly against your tongue. He winces in a mixture of discomfort and pleasure; the sensitivity was almost unbearable, and though it would have been pleasing for you to handle him gently, there was something about feeling the sting of this sensation that made him crave more.

"Ah!" he hisses, indicating the pain overriding all other sensations. "Wan't me to return the favor, 'cutie'?" your tone was somewhat condescending, yet he didn't care. He needed the release so badly, and you were the only one that could give it to him. Nodding frantically, he begs you to give him what he needed.

"Beg some more." you coarsely tell him.

"Oh fuck! Please....pl-please....please, y/n....I'll do anything, just...just fuck me to pieces already!"

You gave off small, subtle licks on the shaft, placing soft kisses up and down while twirling your tongue around the bulbous tip. "Whose the cutie now?"

"You are...AH!"

It was rather bold of him to be so daring, yet a quick slap of your palm reminded him that you weren't playing anymore games. After all, dare he tell others that he didn't like you? He barely knew you! How dare he cause you to cry? Then all of a sudden became our knight in shining armor and came to your aid. How dare he...call you 'cute'?

"One more time, who is the cutie now?"

"Fuck! ah! me....it's me!"

Another slap to his ballsack did him in, and you felt delighted upon hearing him say it. "Still want me to destroy you?"

In a flickering moment, his eyes narrowed down even more, like tight slits, they were sharp enough to cut steel. "Oh yeah..." in a blink of an eye, his deep tone loses all whine and desperation, his arm loops around as he nearly picks your entire form up in the air and slams you down on the bed, tumbling over you. The tables had turned.

"Should of destroyed me when you had the chance, cutie."

"Stop calling me that!"

You fling your hands up, yet he pins them down in an instant, allowing the masculinity of his boyish nature to come through. "Cutie, cutie, cutie. I'm gonna fuck you...cutie."

Your eyes widen upon feeling him rushing in. He didn't even take the time to ease his way through, instead, you felt the shoving thickness and length tapping in, breaking through your walls as the stretch causes your back to arch.

"Yeah...I bet that feels so good..."

"S-slow....slow...d-down......slow down!" you barely could catch your breath, yet he remained ignorant to your words and kept up with his momentum. "But you're so cute when I fuck around with you."

The moment he was all in, you swallowed your words as the new pace he took on made his previous one seemed much slower and easy. Bringing back his whiny voice, he whimpers out in a begging tone, yet still maintained control. It was all so conflicting the way he spoke with his actions not at all mirroring his tone.

"Oh baby...please...please let me feel good....let me cum."

"W-what....Ssssunoo......what....what are you doing....to me!?" you gasped out, a roaring and thrilling sensation of ecstasy punctures your gut each time he thrusts in. "Oh baby....cute baby....I wanna cum so badly....I wanna cum inside you.....I'll be a good boy."

Your eyes roll to the back of your head as you hear his desperate please, yet he continued to fuck you like a raging bull. You couldn't make any sense of it, but it didn't matter. Between hearing his high pitched cries and feeling his cock rupturing your entrance, you could feel the eruption of a bursting orgasm reaching through, it was unlike anything you had ever felt before.

"Oh! I'm....oh my God you're going to make me cum!" you gasped out, tears streaming down your cheeks as you furrowed your brows and looked up with both worry and desperation, expressing both fear for pregnancy and hope that he would not stop.

"My girl, let me cum! Please let me cum deep inside, I promise I'll be a good boy, okay? Just please let me put it all in..."

"Ah! Sssssunoo! Baby!" you felt your cavity flooding out as a rush of warm liquid splashes against his thrusting member, squelching against your skin as he continues to move in and out.

"Please baby! I...I can't hold it in much longer!"

"No Sunoo don't!" you pleaded, yet your heart wasn't all in. You wanted him to, you needed him to do it. There was just something so enthralling about having your words flaring the opposite of your heart's content, much like what he had been doing.

"Oh baby I can't help it! I'm going to cum!"

"Oh please! Sunoo don't! You're going to get me pregnant!"

"Baby I can't stop!"

"Sunoo!"

Your thighs vibrate as you feel the warm liquid seep deep inside your wet muscles. Pleading him to stop, yet wanting him to give you his all had brought about the most intense sexual vigor that you never though existed.

"Oh fuck baby.....cutie....my cute girl...I'm cumming....I promise to be good, just please let me cum inside you everyday, okay?"

Kissing your forehead, he rode out his high and kept up with the psychological collision of being verbally submissive, yet physically dominating. Perhaps to others it wouldn't make sense, but for you and him, it was your own love language that you both developed and embraced.

"Fine...." you caught your breath and speak in a soft tone. "I'll let you do it, but you have to promise me you'll be a good boy, and listen to what I say."

"Yes...my cute girl"

"Don't call me cute...Sunoo."

"Then don't call me 'baby.'"

Rolling your eyes, you both chuckle as you nod in agreement.

Your bodies remained plastered as you both felt the strength of fatigue kicking in, knocking you both out. Just before you drifted off, you took one last look at him. "Sunoo baby...my Sunoo..."

Asleep, you lay soundlessly as he opens both his fox eyes, hearing you mumble those words in secret. "My cute girl."

-Fin

Authors Note: @sunoosrightbuttcheek , i hope you dont mind, i added a little bit of a flare to the sub!sunoo and made him into a little bit of a switch sub/dom, just to make it a little more interesting for you 😏

Enjoyed this piece? Show love and treat your girl to a cup of coffee. ♥️

☕ Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/reinbow

Perm Taglist:

@enheene , aiden2001 , heeseung-min , lathan1510 , rayofsunshineeee , @hoyeonheeseung , @rayofsunshineeee , @yohanabanana , @sunoosrightbuttcheek , @jaeneohee , @icydawon , @silcry , @iamliacamila , @nikstrange ,

#enhypen sunoo #sunoo x reader #kim sunoo #sunoo smut #enha sunoo #enhypen scenarios #enhypen au #enha drabbles #enhypen #enha fics #sunoo #enhypen smut #enhypen drabbles #enhypen angst #enhypen fanfics #sunoo hard thoughts

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creedslove · 4 months

Note

bestie??? that marcus pike headcanon you just wrote??? we, pike girlies, NEED a part 2, marcus and reader getting together after Lisbon broke up with him

(mari, você é uma das melhores coisas que já aconteceu nesse site e você deveria ser tombada como patrimônio cultural pela UNESCO. Não é a mesma pessoa da primeira ask do marcus, to feliz que meu menino tá sendo lembrado por outras pessoas 😭)

Marcus Pike x f!reader

PART ONE

A/N: aí meu amor, obrigada pela sua ask! Que linda, de vdd, vc eh um amor ❤️🥺 o Marcus merece o mundo inteiro ❤️🥺

• when you left Marcus' house after the small argument you had with Lisbon and Marcus had overheard it, you were so deeply embarrassed, you couldn't even word it properly

• you knew feelings weren't supposed to be recriminated and you couldn't actually control them, but still, it was such an awkward situation, the way she'd talked to you, how you realized maybe your feelings were easier to read than you originally thought, how it was so easy for her to go all territorial over him just because you were around and yet anyone could see she wasn't even that into him, not as much as he was into her

• but she was right though; she was his girlfriend and not you, as much as it broke your heart, underneath all that poison Teresa shed, she was telling the truth: she was Marcus' girlfriend, she was the one who was going to move with him and become his wife and if Marcus had any romantic feelings towards you, he would've acted on it already

• and just to think he had heard every single word that went on, he saw how you never denied your feelings for him and how your eyes flooded with tears that insisted on spilling down your cheeks the moment you left his house abruptly, it was mortifying to you

• the fact that Marcus didn't go after you was both crushing and relieving all at once; you understood it, you really did; you wouldn't want your boyfriend running after the friend who stormed off instead of staying by your side, your rational side kept warning you of it

• but your sentimental side, mostly your heart, kept reminding you of how long you'd been friends and how important you had been to each other, the way you would just be inseparable before that woman came along and how Marcus wouldn't hesitate in taking your side

• you weren't selfish or delusional and you were fully aware that if you were his girlfriend or fiancee as that annoying woman liked to state, you would disapprove him having such intimate and intense friendship with another woman, many times you thought of back off from them, but Teresa didn't care about him, not as much as he cared about her; anyone could always see how reluctantly she was around him all the time, and you couldn't stay away from him, being so emotionally dependant from him, it hurt you at the same time it healed you to be so close and yet far away

• so when all of that happened, you saw it was your turn to stay away; you had to do it in order to feel better and let Marcus live his romance in peace, so when Marcus called you up a few times and you didn't pick up, he understood what it meant, he didn't want to overstep it, but it also pained him to think you'd be away for a while

• still, you sent him a text explaining why you had to keep your distance, you explained how much you cared about him and how you hoped he was going to be happy with the woman he chose; you also wished him a nice and safe trip and told him one day you'd go to DC to visit him

• and a few months went by as your friendship with Marcus was shaken up, you hadn't asked him any personal questions in the moments you texted and he didn't say anything about his relationship with Teresa, so you assumed eventually you'd get a wedding invitation or you wouldn't get one at all

• it didn't really matter anymore, you'd lost Marcus, or so you thought

• until the day a bearded Marcus showed up at your work during lunch break; he was in his regular dark suit, his FBI credential dangling from his pocket but he'd grown a beard and his hair seemed longer too

"Marcus..."

• you whispered as you weren't expecting to see him there, especially now that he was so different. He had his hands in his pockets and smiled shyly, chuckling as you complimented his new look, shrugging in a cute way as he explained he had been out undercover

"listen, I know the things haven't been great between us for the past few months, but I miss you, I really do, you've been the best person in my life for so long, I could call you a best friend, but you're so much more than that, and I'm sorry about things and Teresa, I-"

• you didn't even let him finish, going to Marcus and wrapping your arms around him, only then realizing how much you'd missed him. At that moment it didn't really matter what happened or if he was with Teresa anymore, all you wanted was to be close to him

"Pancakes? You can tell me everything over pancakes!"

• you suggested with a sweet, lovely smile, feeling excited and cheerful to see him again; Marcus took you to your favorite diner, where you are your favorite treats together and he told you about how things didn't work with Teresa and she's left him for Jane, he admitted he didn't call you earlier because he was ashamed of everything went on and asked you if you could both work on your friendship together once more; you agreed as you'd missed him very much

• and like that you and Marcus got closer again, enjoying each other's presence and he finally invited you to visit him in DC; one thing led to another and you and Marcus finally became more than friends

• a year later when you were back home for the wedding, you and him ended up running into Teresa and Jane, she didn't seem pleased to see you with Marcus, but in the end you couldn't care less, she'd made her choice and you were pretty happy about it, as you were finally with the man of your dreams and it couldn't be any better than that

____

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal headcanon #pedro pascal headcanons #marcus pike #marcus pike x reader #marcus pike x you #marcus pike x y/n #marcus pike fanfiction #marcus pike fanfic #marcus pike headcanon #marcus pike headcanons

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beatrixstonehill2 · 6 months

Text

"OK, guys, don't get mad.... Buuuut I'm detransitioning! I know, I know, I said I wasn't thinking about it. But what trans girl doesn't occasionally fantasize about what it'd be like, especially those of us who went on blockers and never went through male puberty. Sooo, I didn't think about it super often. Like people would occasionally ask me if I wanted to detrans and I'd shrug and be like, "I dunno..... maybe someday? Who knows!" I never seriously considered it outside of like shower thoughts or the occasional jerk off session before work....

But I met this girl, Alexia..... Guys. She is beyond fine. She's absolutely beautiful. She contacted me out of nowhere and asked if I wanted to hook up. This beautiful cis girl with boobs even bigger than mine. And lol, yes I know mine are way too big as it is. Just another reason to detrans, my boobs make me soooo dysphoric! Ugh! I can't believe I ever thought I was a girl..... Alexia got me thinking a lot about myself, and made me realize I'm totally just a femboy. Like I'll wear dresses and makeup, but I want no boobs, no big fat estrogen booty. I want to be lean, and to grow some facial hair maybe.....

Alexia started talking to me on our first date about how a lot of trans girls are really femboys and they just don't know. Especially us ditzy ones that go on blockers so young and never go through boy puberty. She miiiight've told me how hot it was if I were to detrans and try out becoming a femboy. I told her about how I hate having huge boobs and looking like some dumb college slut who's pushed out a dozen kids already. Like look at the stretch marks on these udders! I told her I wanted a slim, elegant figure, and to embrace having a cock, not hide it. That I wanted mine to be really big..... She agreed, she said she wants a sexy feminine boyfriend she can go dress shopping with and share makeup, but who can also fuck her good, get her pregnant. I told her I'm not experienced as a top and she just shook her head.

'You poor, dumb boy,' she said. 'You probably can't because all that estrogen turned your cock flaccid and pathetically small.'

She wants me on testosterone ASAP. She already helped me make the call to schedule my top surgery, to get rid of my boobs.... We only met a couple weeks ago..... She wants me to be a boy now, and I'm not about to say no. ❤️ Goodbye girly body and big fat udders, I'm detransitioning like a good boy. My girlfriend is very needy and bought me penis growth pills. She wants me to have a huge, meaty cock and wants to teach me how to use it like a guy.... She's gonna teach me to top her, and more importantly, she wants me to get her pregnant to prove what a man I'm becoming..... I told her I don't plan on getting super macho and she said of course not. I'll always be lean and elegant, and she'll even peg me when I've been especially good..... But she did tell me one thing..... I'm not allowed to masturbate. I can only cum two ways: If I'm topping her, or if she's pegging me, which I'll only get as a reward if I can please her like the boy I'm meant to be. Guys.... I think I might be in love. Either way, so long to being a girl. ❤️"

#mtftm kink #mtf detrans kink #detrans kink

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ranaissingle · 1 year

Text

In My Mind

Masterlist Summary: Reader exists in the same circle as Austin and has been head over heels in love with him for years but she never speaks up over the course of their friendship until a new years party. Rating: T Word Count: 2.1 k ( I swear this was meant to be a short whip I have no idea what happened)

Warnings: Unrequited love lol (can you tell I'm feeling angsty?) A/N: Hey girlies, it's been a hot minute haha. School kinda got in the way and then I had to learn (for the zillionth time) that men ain't shit (besides our lord and savior Austin Butler of course). I quite literally have no inspiration so please do send me some requests. I'm thinking of doing another angst fic about Hanahaki disease... How do we feel?

────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────

When Austin told you he had started dating Vanessa Hudgens you felt like you wanted to die. Yes. Die. The world seemed to close in on you as he continued explaining how they had met and how he had asked her out. Each word was another knife in your throat and every admission of his love for her tore your heart into smaller and smaller pieces.

But you sat there and listened. You listened as he detailed their first kiss, their first date, his confession, and hers to him. It took each ounce of self-control to not get up and scream. Scream at him for not knowing how you felt and scream for the heart that had broken.

But you kept your mouth shut. You helped Austin plan all the valentines day dates, the birthday trips, and each anniversary date. Every single thing he had done for her and every girl he had been with since had been painstakingly vetted by you. You were happy to help him, but the fact that all your preparations were for another girl was a hard pill to swallow.

Everything came to a head when he started dating Kaia Gerber. She was beautiful. in every way imaginable she was conventionally attractive. Her skinny legs, straight waist, and small hips made you want to collapse in on yourself. She was perfect in every way. She was everything you were not. Tall, skinny, and beautiful.

Austin was smitten. He had developed a habit of dating skinny models and he had yet to break it. You were anything but surprised when she caught his eye when he asked you if you had her number, when he took her out for the first date, and then eventually when they started dating. It was routine for you now.

He would meet a girl, become infatuated, date her, dump her, then move on to the next one.

But at least you stayed constant. You had been constant for well over a decade at this point. That was more than any of the other girls could say. So you were content, until the New Year's of 2022. It was December 31st, 2022 and Austin had just broken up with his latest fling and had elected to spend New Year's as a free agent. You had never really had a date on new years because your previous relationships always ended before the fateful day or started after. You had grown accustomed to accompanying the same leather chair in the corner of your living room while you watched your friends with their respective partners mingle about your house. You sipped champagne as you watched couples drunkenly sway together as the countdown began to draw dangerously close to midnight.

1 hour to midnight

You spotted Austin out of the corner of your eye and you felt the iciness in your heart melt when he smiled at the people he spoke to. He was in the middle of a group of 4 other people yet still looked ethereal. His hair shone under the kitchen light and the crinkles around his eyes made you want to run your fingers over them.

You watched him. You watched how his lips moved. You traced his figure with your eyes until you reached his hands. His fingers picked at the cuticles of his nails. It was his nervous habit. He always resorted to picking at his cuticles whenever he was around people he didn't know well. It had led to many last-minute manicures before photoshoots to help deal with the redness it left.

30 minutes to midnight

You slowly pushed yourself off the comfortable chaise and made your way over to him. Maybe if you were with him he would feel so nervous, and it could save you from a last-minute call to the nail salon where you had to beg for an opening. You slid in next to him and smiled at the people around him. They barely looked away from Austin to greet you, but you were fine with that. Austin was the star, not you. You slipped your hands in his hand and tugged it behind your back to keep it out of view from those around you.

Austin thrived off of physical touch. He needed it like the air he breathed. Whenever he was feeling nervous or overwhelmed being enveloped in a hug from you or even just having your hand in his was enough to calm the nerves and allow him to breathe. Austin looked down to where you were pressed into his side.

You knew him so well that even from across the room you knew he needed grounding. His chest swelled with pride for a reason he couldn't quite pinpoint. His conversation with those around him continued without a hitch and when the countdown started to broadcast on the TV, they all made their way to their respective partners leaving you and Austin alone at the kitchen island.

15 minutes to midnight

You kept Austin's hand clasped in yours as the countdown numbers descended. Neither of you planned on moving or letting go. The warmth of his hand reached places all over your body and practically heated you up from the inside.

7 minutes to midnight

Austin leaned his head down to whisper into your ear, "If I didn't know you better I'd say that you end up single on New Year's on purpose." You heard the smile in his voice.

"Do you?"

His brown furrowed together, "Do I what?"

You matched him with a grin of your own.

"Know me better." The half tilt of your head made his stomach churn.

His laugh was smooth and boisterous. He brought his other arm around your shoulder to bring you closer to his side. Your heart slowed as you relaxed into him and abandoned your unnecessarily alcoholic drink on the kitchen counter.

5 minutes to midnight

"Hey." Austin's voice cut into the still air of the room. His eyes were trained on the TV and you looked up at his jaw as you waited for him to finish his sentence.

"Do you… do you wish you had a date? For New Year that is." The question caught you off guard and you twitched as you pressed into his side.

"uhm, I-I. I gues-" You stuttered when you couldn't seem to form a cohesive response. Your heart started to accelerate again and your breaths came out in short pants.

You took a deep breath to steady yourself once more to better be able to form a cohesive sentence.

"Well, I guess no one wants to be alone on New years. But that is just how it always seems to happen." You paused a sudden feeling of bravery came over you. The most likely culprit of such a feeling being the alcohol.

"And the person I would like to be with is almost always in a relationship during the New Year." You focused your gaze on the suddenly very interesting kitchen tiles. You had previously told Austin about someone that you had a crush on for years. You had tried to keep it yourself but Austin tended to pry when it came to matters of love but as much as he tried to wrangle the information out of you about who it was, you had kept tight-lipped and unwavering in your resistance to respond.

"Oh?" His eyebrow quirked up as he looked away. It seems he had also taken a sudden interest in the wall decor you had across the room.

"Is this the same guy you've told me about before?" His voice was deep and his throat bobbed as he spoke.

"Yes, it is actually. The very same."

"Haven't you been into this guy for years Y/N?"

"Yes, I have."

"And you are still into him? Why? He is the stupidest man in the world if he hasn't noticed by now." His chuckle was low but you could tell he didn't actually find it remotely funny.

You looked up at him and wished that he would understand from your eyes that you were talking about him, that you were in love with him.

But you had been in love with him for nigh over 10 years and the dolt had yet to come to any significant realization regarding your feelings so there was no use hoping for something like that now.

"Well, I would stop loving him if I could, but as soon as I feel like I can get over him, he does something that has been crawling back." You shrugged lightly and took another sip of your drink before placing it back on the counter.

3 minutes to midnight

"And it doesn't help that he is my best friend." You were skirting around the dangerous territory with that statement. You knew you were. But you were so tired that all the previous reservations and rules you had so painstakingly followed, disappeared.

Austin's eyes widened in confusion.

"Best friend? You have another best friend?" Austin was too slow for his own good.

You shrugged before replying, "Nope, I only have one best friend."

He let out an exasperated sigh

"So I'm not your best friend?!" Your eye twitched.

"No Austin. You are my only best friend."

"So who are you in love with?" Your fingers twitched. You were going to strangle him.

"I am in love with my one and only best friend."

Silence

Austin tensed next to you and you awaited the sting of his rejection that you had spent the better part of the last 10 years preparing for.

2 minutes to midnight

The silences echoed in the room despite the growing cheers of those around you. The timer was steadily counting down the seconds and you wanted to vomit.

The bile rose in your throat when the counter reached 30 seconds. Awaiting his rejection was arguably worse than the rejection itself.

You pushed away from him. His previously comforting warmth had twisted something in your gut and now you wanted to vomit.

His hand traced your back as you slid away before it fell back to his side. He stuttered out a "W-wait."

But you didn't want to

3 Austin yanked you back until your face was back in his chest and his arm was around your waist. He moved his head into your neck and pushed his nose into your hair before taking a deep breath.

2 Your breath caught when he pulled your head away from him to look into your eyes. 1 He kissed you. He kissed so hard you could have sworn you had fireworks behind your eyes. His hands were everywhere. Crossing your neck, cupping your hips, and splaying across your back. He kissed you until neither of you could breathe anymore. You wrenched away from each other and gulped down large breaths of fresh air.

His hand shakily pressed against your cheek and you looked up to meet his eyes. You didn't want this to be something that only happened because it was the heat of the moment. You wanted it to mean something to him. You wanted him to love you the same way you had for years. You didn't want this to be mean nothin-

"I love you." You had the timbre of his voice memorized. You knew it was Austin speaking but you still looked around you dreading the possibility of him not speaking to you.

But your face was still cupped in between his hands and his eyes were on you.

your eyes were wide as you looked at him You felt stinging and then a prick of tears in your eyes. They fell slowly down your cheeks one by one and Austin kissed each of them away.

All at once you need him on you all over again. You had gone years without so much as a kiss on the cheek from him and you would be damned if you continued in that fashion.

So you pulled his lips hard against you and kissed him until your lips were numb and swollen, and even then you didn't want him off of you.

────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────

well, this was probably shitty so forgive me. It has been a while since I posted so figured I needed to back in the groove of things haha. I think I might do a professor x university student Austin fic next so watch out for that lol.

#austin butler smut #austin butler fic #austin butler #austin butler imagine #austin butler fanfic #austin butler elvis #austin butler fanfiction #austin butler x reader #austin elvis x reader #austin x reader #austin!elvis x reader #austinbutler #austin butler angst #austin butler series #austin butler x you #austin butler x black!reader #austin butler x fem!reader #austin butl #Spotify

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gasolinerainbowpuddles · 5 months

Text

Cinnamon and Sugar ║ ⓞⓝⓔ๏ⓞⓕⓕⓢ

𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙿𝚎𝚍𝚛𝚘 𝚂𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚂𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝 𝚂𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚊 𝚏𝚒𝚌 𝚎𝚡𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎

| CINNAMON AND SUGAR | main masterlist | PAIRING(s): Joel Miller x reader

| RATING: explicit material | 18+ | WORD COUNT: 4.2k | CONTENT: age gap, Joel being the main caretaker for Sarah's dog while she's away at college, intimation of situation involving assault/SA with no graphic or descriptive language/discussion, smut, dog being cute, Joel being a reluctant grumpy dog grandpa

| SYNOPSIS: Joel needs a better solution for dog care, and you're the perfect fit. When Joel in turn becomes the perfect fit for what you need, the lines between professional and personal start to blur.

Sarah had more than surprised Joel when she came home with Cinnamon. He hadn’t even realized she’d be scouring the internet for listings and traveling to meet with owners, breeders, and shelters in search of the perfect companion. Joel’s stomach turned when he realized how many potentially dangerous meet-ups she’d gone to without his knowledge, all in search of a stupid dog. Of course it was partially his fault that she kept it a sworn secret; he wouldn’t have been open to the idea. He never had been. All the time, patience, and money needed for a family pet never came into alignment when Sarah was growing up. He’d almost given in to a cat once since they didn’t require as much work, but he managed to steer Sarah into a fake robot puppy gift instead.

But now with Sarah heading into another semester at college, Joel was left with the task of finding care arrangements until she came home. Depending on what projects or planning he had going on, Joel could be out of the house 12 plus hours a day for three weeks straight and then the next couple of weeks would be just here and there type management on building sites where he could take Cinnamon along for the ride. He hadn’t always been fond of Cinnamon, but having a travel companion was nice. And, if he was being honest with himself, having her around while Sarah was away meant he wasn’t left with a silent, empty house. The guys would poke fun at him for carting around a Corgi, but he really didn’t give two shits about having a “girly dog” or whatever the fuck they were on about.

He wished he could do better by Cinnamon than an erratic schedule with kennels and doggy daycares one week and being able to ride in his truck with him for hours on end the next week. It was probably confusing for a dog, but there wasn’t much other option - until you came along. You were around Sarah’s age, that much he could tell when he answered the door that fateful day. You didn’t really have the same spitfire confidence he’d somehow instilled in Sarah, though. You had enough courage to knock on a random stranger’s door and offer dog walking and sitting services, sure, but there was something distinctly small and unsure in the way you carried yourself.

Still, you had a warmth about you that was undeniable. Joel’s instincts told him you were good people. Cinnamon took to you immediately, which was all the confirmation Joel needed to decide what could it hurt to have a more prominent, steady figure in the dog care mix. It was a hell of a lot cheaper than what the kennels and daycares were charging. It didn’t hurt that you were absolutely stunning. He felt like a creep whenever he snuck glances at you, but it was hard to ignore the delightful curves and valleys of your body. It was even worse when you gave him a genuine smile - bright and consuming, making it feel like the air was ten times thicker when he tried to pull in a normal breath.

As awful as it sounded and as awful as it was to think, he sometimes wished that you’d take more than just the one semester off from school. He was banking on you not taking up a summer semester, but that only bought him around 6 months of you being around. Every time he saw you, he became greedier. He wanted to see more of you. He wanted to explore more of you. He wanted to know more about you. He wanted you to know more about him. It was wrong to find himself so deeply engrossed with someone only a few years older than his own daughter, but he couldn’t help it. He’d tried - god had he tried - to keep it professional, to keep his distance.

But you didn’t make it easy. It wasn’t anything you were consciously doing. He might lose his mind entirely if you were to ever intentionally pursue him. He wouldn’t be able to take much of a concentrated effort on your end before completely succumbing to every dirty, greedy thought he’d ever had about you. He hoped he wasn’t too obvious about his fixation on you. He didn’t want to be the stereotypical old pervert trying to poach some young skirt he had no business chasing.

He kept that safe, polite buffer between the two of you - until he just couldn’t bear it any longer.

You knew you should’ve kept your distance - kept it professional. Well, as professional as “I just needed to make some money since I took an entire semester off after a breakdown, so I’m going to do the first thing that lands in my lap which just so happens to be dog walking and sitting for random people in the neighborhood” is. But as you sit here scratching behind Cinnamon’s ears, you knew it would’ve been pointless to avoid the inevitable of finding your favorite dog and favorite owner - or maybe longterm caretaker would be the more appropriate term.

Joel was something special. You’d never met someone like him before, never met a man like him before. Someone dedicated to his family. Someone focused on his work and successful because of it. Someone who was equally charming and goofy. Someone who actually listened to you when you spoke and didn’t try to insert their own take on what you “should’ve done” or condescendingly explain to you how and where it all went wrong.

He was the first person you’d talked to about the real reason you’d abruptly taken a semester off school. You hadn’t even told your parents about the party you never should’ve gone to, the drinks you never should’ve taken, and the friend you were too drunk to take care of. No one but Joel knew about the ongoing investigation and the severed friendship, all because you’d ignored your gut and didn’t put up enough of an argument with your friend about steering clear of that particular fraternity with the notorious reputation.

You’d even admitted to Joel that you felt guilty for coming out of the situation with nothing more than some mental and emotional damage while your friend had been through something no amount of time would ever make right. It should’ve been me and I feel like it’s all my fault were always met with an understanding, comforting touch and word from Joel. His reassurances were the first time you’d actually believed it when someone told you it wasn’t your fault and you experienced something awful, too.

You’d justified spilling your innermost workings to him since he had Sarah to think about. He could warn her about things like this so she didn’t experience it, too. The idea that ripping yourself open and divulging the hardest, darkest thing you’ve ever been through would help someone else avoid the same experience took one straw off the camel’s back. It wasn’t much, but at least it was something. At least it was a good thing coming from something so wretched and vile.

But then your phone rings, and your fingertips freeze where they scratch Cinnamon’s ears. The number flashes on the screen, and it’s the school. You’d already given numerous interviews and statements over the past three months. They had been waiting for the police investigation to conclude before they made their own determination about the situation.

Your heart drops when the woman on the other end says “no criminal charges” and “insufficient evidence to support the claims.” It feels like a hollow victory when she says the two fraternity members in question would be allowed to finish this semester but are not welcome to complete their degrees at the institution. The indefinite waiver for your academic furlough would expire at the end of this semester.

Cinnamon’s anxious whining breaks your stupor, and you head out on a walk with her to clear your mind.

The house is dark when Joel drives up. Your car was still here, which made the apparent empty house all the more odd. He didn’t realize how accustomed he’d become to coming home to you most nights. Maybe it was just the downpour that was making it hard to tell if a light was still on somewhere in the house. Joel darts from his truck to the front door and lets himself in.

The house is quiet, especially in contrast to the cracks of thunder punctuating the silence every so often. He calls out for you and then Cinnamon but hears nothing. He calls your phone. No answer. Just when he’s beginning to panic about where the hell you could possibly be, the front door opens.

If it weren’t for the downcast expression etched into your features, the sight of you bundling Cinnamon underneath your shirt would’ve been hilarious. You were soaked from head to toe, but Cinnamon’s head popping out of the shared collar of your t-shirt had miraculously stayed mostly dry. Joel helped lower Cinnamon out from your shirt and set her on the ground before straightening back up to inspect you.

“You’re soaked.” He sounds almost impressed with how drenched you’d managed to get.

“I didn’t realize it was about to rain, sorry,” you mumble. “I know Cinnamon hates thunder. I feel like an asshole.”

Joel glances down to a business as usual Cinnamon and back to you. “I think she’ll be alright. I’m more worried about you. Was startin’ to get outta sorts when the house was dark and empty but your car’s in the drive.”

“I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry,” you apologize, shaking your head.

“Hey, come on. It’s alright. Stay there while I get you a towel, okay?” Without waiting for an answer, Joel lopes to the laundry area to retrieve several large, faded pool towels and unfolds them for you. You whisper a thanks and gingerly wrap one around your shivering body. Now that you were back inside the dry, warm house, you realize just how chilly the rain had made you.

“You’re shaking, honey,” Joel observes. His hand hovers open nearby like he wants to reach out and warm you but is hesitant of the possibility of a negative reception. “Let’s get you—”

“The school called,” you interject. Joel visibly tenses for a moment. “The police said there wasn’t enough proof of anything to press any charges, but the school said they’re allowed to finish out the semester but aren’t welcome back after that. My hiatus expires at the end of the semester. So. Yeah.” A rigid lift and drop of your shoulders doesn’t quite sell the false indifference to the situation you’re attempting to convey.

Cinnamon meanders over to your feet and starts pawing at you and whining. “What is it, Cin? It’s alright. Everything’s okay,” you assure her - lie to her to prevent upset. When you look back to Joel, he’s pinning you with a heavy expression that you can’t quite discern. “What?”

Joel shrugs in an unconvincing manner just as you had. “Just wants to make sure you’re alright. Me ‘n her both.”

You deflate a little, letting your guard down a touch. “I’m okay. I just– I dunno sometimes. It’s a better outcome than what I had expected, but I still feel disappointed.”

“That’s because it’s a fucked up situation, honey,” he soothes. He takes a tentative step towards you and softens when your body relaxes the closer he gets.

You’re tired of keeping up a front of being okay. You’re tired of pretending that you don’t want to wrap yourself up in the comfort of Joel. When his fingertips skim your forearm and wrap around your elbow, something inside of you snaps. You have to let go of the guilt from things that were completely out of your control. You had to stop telling yourself the story that you didn’t deserve to feel safe and happy after what your friend had gone through. You had to stop letting yourself and the bad things that had happened to you control your life.

Joel’s brows knit together, his eyes searching yours for some clue of where the wash of emotions would drift to next so he could be there before you were swept up in the swell of it. “You’re gonna be okay. I promise. I promise you, you’re not alone,” he vows. Cinnamon noses at your legs and huffs out a bark as if in agreement.

A chill rips through you with the towel draped around you now a sopping wet mess as well. You shiver at the contrasting warmth of Joel’s large hand delicately gripping your arm. He tuts and guides you upstairs to the bathroom in the hallway while he starts rummaging around Sarah’s room for what you assume are some dry clothes.

After a couple of minutes he rushes out looking flushed and nervous, only mumbling something about it being “safer” to go through his own wardrobe. You imagine he must’ve found something very normal for a college aged woman to have but not necessarily something she might want a parent to stumble upon.

Joel is back quickly with a bundle of clothing, and your chest feels tighter at the thought of being shrouded in his things, the smell of him surrounding and blanketing you. You accept the dry clothes and set them aside on the countertop.

“Do you, um– would it be alright if I got a shower? To warm up a little bit?” you ask through chattering teeth.

“Of course, of course,” he replies quickly.

“Okay good. Thanks. I’m pretty sure I’ve got a full chest of hair stuck to me from stuffing Cinnamon inside my shirt,” you snort.

Joel laughs under his breath at the mental image. “The, uh, the shower is– Sarah’s shower is sort of tricky. Haven’t fixed the lever yet,” he half mutters to himself. His eyes settle back on you, unsure of himself, before you fill in the blank for him.

“Oh, if it’s too much of a hassle, I don’t have to,” you counter. “I mean, unless there’s– if there’s some other shower?”

Joel visibly swallows hard at the meandering shift of tension towards something more intimate. “Yeah, come on, you can just use mine.”

He grabs the clothes from the counter and guides you quickly down the hallway through his bedroom. He gives you a quick look over before saying he’ll “be around if you need anything.” Your eyes burn into the back of the bathroom door where Joel’s retreating, broad back had just been. You undress and slip inside the shower, and you think Joel must’ve renovated it himself. It’s a spacious but cozy masculine alcove that is fairly clean. You turn the knob and relax into the heavy stream of water that quickly warms you.

The slip of water takes the chill of your body with it down the drain, and now your body can register the other prominent feeling surging through it. Your hand lathered in Joel’s body wash brushes over your hardening nipples, and you bite back a gasp. You know before your hand even travels further down that you’re going to be wet. Everything in the bathroom looks, feels, and smells like Joel. The ache of him not actually being in here with you is too much to go without. You don’t even bother to finish washing up and decide to turn the shower off.

You slap a towel around you and swing the door open. The room is empty. You walk out of the bathroom, dripping all over the carpeted bedroom floor, and turn when you hear the sound of heavy footfall ascending the stairs. Joel’s head is down as he runs his hands through his hair like he’s trying to shake something loose, and he’s in the doorway before it pops up. He stills the moment he drinks in your half-naked form. You can see him wavering on whether or not to act on the tension in the room when you don’t make a move to cover yourself or slip back into the bathroom for privacy.

“Joel.” It’s a choked whisper of a plea. His eyes flutter shut at the sound of it leaving your lips. You both know the unsaid thing trapped in the utterance of it.

“We can’t,” he protests weakly. He clenches his fists by his sides as he braves to meet your eye. You can see his resolve waning with every quick blink. You track the snake of his gaze down your dripping wet body.

“I’m tired of telling myself I don’t deserve to feel good.”

His eyes tear to yours at that. There’s a simmering turned blazing in it that makes your tummy do a flip. “I want for you to make me feel good. I want to make you feel good, too.” His jaw goes a little slack with your steady, firm admission. He feels it. He can’t deny it. You let the towel fall to the floor and walk towards him, and he leans into your outstretched arms. He doesn’t resist when you guide his mouth to your neck and chest. His tongue swipes and licks across you like he’s chasing the beads of water down your body.

A needy moan rips through you, and the last bit of resolve shatters. You work Joel’s shirt over his head as he yanks his belt and pants off. You stumble backward together onto his bed and feverishly grope and fondle every available inch of skin. You groan in unison when you drag his fingertips down and through the drooling entrance of your pussy. He tests two fingers inched inside you and plunges them to the knuckle of his fist when you roll your hips onto them, searching for that fullness.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he works his thick digits slowly back and forth. The damp heat of his mouth on your perked nipples feels like there’s a circuit of arousal between them and your clit where Joel’s thumb rubs in agonizingly precise, low circles.

“So pretty,” he breathes out before grazing a delicate bite of his teeth on a nipple. Your back arches off the bed at the sensation. Your fingers grip through his hair as you frantically push his head down, begging all the while please please your mouth please. A wicked grin curves the line of his mouth at your uninhibited plea for more.

“Yeah? You want me to taste you, honey?” he teases.

You’re practically in tears from the build up and the want and all of this charged energy between you two for the past few months finally coming to a head. You start to plead again, anything to feel his lips and tongue on your pussy, but it shifts to a sobbing whine when he lays a wide, lapping tongue down your slit. Your legs snap together at the sudden influx of sensation, and Joel is quick to drag your thighs onto his shoulders to keep you open for him. An arm over your lower stomach pins you into the fluttering lick of his tongue, and you’re gone the moment he sinks two fingers into you again.

The slap of rain against the window is a white noise much like the whirling silence in your mind as your climax grips you. You’re practically clawing at him to press his weight against you. He lets out a delightful hiss of pleasure when you grip the base of his cock. When you attempt to line him up with your entrance, he stops you.

“We really shouldn’t– I don’t have anything—” He’s faltering, stumbling over his words as he tries to come up with something to talk himself out of burying his entire length into you, to fuck you raw and hard and ignore all sane thought.

“I wanna feel you, Joel, so bad. Please,” you whimper. You know you shouldn’t. You know it’s not responsible. You can’t bring yourself to care when his stiff cock is weeping precum, ready to split you open.

Any and all restraint Joel can muster is no match for your soft whine for him. “S’that how you want it, honey? You wanna feel all’uh me?” he grunts. He presses himself against your folds and drags himself slowly through the pooling slick. Your hands cradle his face and draw him closer.

“I need you,” you choke out.

“I’m right here, I’m right here, honey. I’ve got you,” he pants.

He rests his thick tip right at your entrance and holds your gaze as he pushes into you. Your mouth falls open at the heavy split of him inside you. “Fuck,” he hisses. “Feel so fuckin’ good. Fuckin’ tight–goddamn.” You dig your heels into his ass to pull him closer. You’re nearly trembling with bliss when he bottoms out. Your body is a limp wreck when he starts moving in earnest.

“This what ya needed? Needed to be stretched out around me, huh?” he pants. You respond in a series of garbled, high-pitched moans. Joel’s eyebrows knit together with renewed concentration like if he didn’t keep focus he’d come right then and there. “Goddamn, been wantin’ this for so long,” he gasps, hammering his hips into the cradle of your thighs. His hand engulfs the back of your head so that he can prop it up and see in full the state he’s reduced you to, pliant and taking everything he can give you.

Your head lolls side to side gently in his grip, but you manage to lock eyes. It’s a fervid, reverential expression that you can’t quite understand being on the receiving end of, especially from a man as good as this. “That’s it–yeah, that’s it, honey. Right here. Tell me what I’m doin’ to you, huh?” he groans.

“You feel s-so good,” you croak. He rests his forehead against yours and lifts your hips up higher onto him. The slight adjustment has the entire heft and length of him kissing the mouth of your womb with each stroke. You let out an almost hysterical sound at the unyielding command of your body at his touch. The new angle gifts you with Joel’s expression of brows pulled together in pleasure, jaw loose, mouth hanging open and letting out a strangled whimper.

Like an animated corpse sparked to life with splintered lightning, your entire body jolts into an arc of ecstasy as your second orgasm crackles and slices through every nerve ending in your body. Joel fucks you through it for as long as he can before hastily pulling out and spurting all over your stomach with a deep growl reverberating through his chest. You entangle yourselves in each other as you come down from your collective highs.

“So good,” is all you can whisper like a chant. You rake your fingers through his dampened curls and feel as though your body has undergone a factory reset of sorts. Joel slumped over your form feels like a shroud of adoration and protection. You wish you could keep this moment suspended in time, able to visit it whenever and however long you pleased.

Joel’s breath fanning against your ear begins to slow and comes to a steady rhythm before he speaks. “You’re gonna be okay. We’re gonna figure all this out.”

Your school situation. The reality of having to go back there, a place that will never feel safe like it once had. A place where you’d made and now lost one of the closest friends you’d ever had. A place where you’d be expected to pick back up where you left off like everything was normal.

“What if it’s not? What if it’s not okay?” You hate yourself for popping the bubble of euphoria you and Joel had just created, but you can’t keep it in any longer. You can’t keep yourself closed off from Joel anymore, having finally let those gates break down and allowed the engulfing wave of want and need swallow you up. There was no going back on this, whatever this had been. Whatever it was.

Joel pulls back slightly to study your face. His jaw sets with determination even when his eyes stay so soft and gentle for you. “I promise. You ain’t alone. I’m here for you now if you– if that’s somethin’ you want, I mean.”

A lazy smile spreads across your face. “I think I’d like that a lot,” you whisper.

He grins down at you before capturing your mouth in a soft, commanding kiss. One that’s claiming and soothing. You’re getting lost in each other again when you hear the impatient scratch of Cinnamon from the floor. You both reluctantly tear away from each other and look towards the interruption. Cinnamon’s face says I’ve let you have your fun, now somebody get your ass up and feed me. Joel cracks first, erupting into a half-heartedly annoyed round of low laughter. You follow with your own fit of giggles.

He reluctantly extricates himself from the bed and helps clean you up with the towel you’d dropped onto the floor earlier. You’re both somewhat dressed as you head downstairs to tend to Cinnamon. Watching Joel indulge her and give her nuzzle scratches just how she likes fills you with a warm sense of confidence: with somebody like Joel by your side, looking after you and supporting you, things might just really end up okay.

This was written for the @pedrostories Secret Santa Exchange, and it is for my lovely giftee @thirtysevenodddogs! I hope you enjoyed it!

Special thanks to @xdaddysprincessxx for helping me choose the dog breed and name.

Merry Christmas, ♥Puddles♥

#fic event #pedrostories #pedrostoriesgift23 #joel miller x reader

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