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payservewomen · 3 months

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I’m tempted to say “I’ve hit a new low”😔 but in reality, I’ve been at rock bottom for…a very long time. Years I suppose.

But at least a few years ago, I interacted with women outside of work. But now? I don’t even leave my bedroom on my days off from work.

I sit on my bed, watching humiliation clips; calling ignore phone lines; taking embarrassing photos of myself; edging myself, oftentimes for many hours(almost never less than 4hrs. up to 12hrs)

The one newer development is- I’ll edge for a while, but then the sadness/anxiety makes me go limp….or i’ll be semi hard but my loser penis only grows slightly larger.

It’s like i’m trying to keep in as small as possible, because I know it should be teeny tiny. It CAN grow to 7in but considering how pathetic I am, part of me wishes I had a microdick. Then I could forget these thoughts i have of becoming a normal person again.

Then I could search 24/7 for a superior woman who wants to use and abuse me.

I fantasize about meeting a woman and dating….Getting comfortable with her to the point that I’m able to do the best I’m capable of in making her orgasm…. But then we open up and share kinks etc….and i know as time goes on, there will be many times my dick doesn’t work.

Slowly over time, she realizes just how much of a beta i am, and begins flirting with real, confident men.

By this time, we’re living together; Maybe one month she asks me to cover all the rent, then bills and spends her money on going out….Then a “friend” of hers(maybe with a unisex name that’s usually a woman’s name)is coming into town; she offers our place to stay….Tells me to make dinner etc saying “ali loves lobster tails and filet mignon! I know ur low on money, but it’s ok! I’ll still have enough left until ur next paycheck! Thanks sweetie! Maybe we’ll meet at the airport, then I’ll let you know when we’re on our way, flight gets in i think about 5pm but who knows if it’ll be on time”

I get off work, begin prepping everything….texting her asking if ali’s plane arrived at 5:30….”it did but we’re tryna find the luggage etc. With traffic it’ll take quite a while, plan for a late dinner!”

By 6:30, still nothing, so i text then call to find her phones off.

I figure she’ll probably be walking in any minute….So i check the “find my iphone” tryna be extra sweet and have everything timed perfectly. I see it moved from the airport towards home and begin making dinner….Until i realize another hour has passed. I check it again to see it’s been somewhere between home and the airport for 2 hours now!

Next thing i know, it’s 10, then 11, then 12 midnight!

I’m dozing off and finally see a text “Omg babe i’m sorry! I lost track of time! Ali said getting a hotel room would be easier, and we’ve just been catching up but ugh it got so late and you know how i don’t like to drive at night anyway, so I’m just gonna stay here tonight, see ya tomorrow!”

I just fall asleep, and wake in the AM to see several weird video texts from a number i don’t know….I hear giggling and a man’s voice….almost seeming like someone’s trying to record something and my gf saying “no stop don’t! that’s mean ali!” There’s at least 4-5 clips like that, the last one ending with my girlfriends sexy belly on the screen. I figure ohhh they’re just having fun i guess? But it did give me a bad feeling in my stomach….

Those vids were sent at about 1am. Then at 2am, just a close up of what i’m sure is my gf’s skin, but i can’t tell what part of her body…..but the audio on it was simply my gfs voice sounding like she’s whining or moaning or something? and saying “mmmmm ohhhhk fuck it”

Then 30mins later the clip begins blacked out, but with clear audio…just sounds like licking and slurping….Then a man’s voice “yeah worship it bitch. Now, say it” then the phone moves, showing an arrogant looking man smiling, then it slowly pans down over his entire perfectly fit muscular body….very slowly, stopping on each part of his stunningly perfect body….i mean this guy had an 8pack! Absolutely chiseled in every way. Then it stops to show his abs and v-lines, and then slowly shows his balls…I didn’t know balls could actually be that big!

Then slowly as possible, the camera moves to show the thickest cock i’ve ever seen!

Then the vids stop…but there’s a text at 4am with only an address….my gf knows i wake up for work at 4am…

i call and text her but her phones off ofc. I go to work, and finally around noon, my gf calls saying she’s going shopping with Ali, saying she didn’t bring any of her credit cards asking if i’ve got any money left…i tell her i’m not sure how much, but i’ve got $500 in a sportsbook app from winning the night before…”omg babe that’s perfect! Don’t worry i can move it from there, is it your normal password?” I answer yes, and ask her just to leave at least $100 or so….

And ask if theyre gonna be having dinner tonight…”yeah sweetie we are! I’ll let you know when we’re on the way”

I ask her wtf all those vids were. and who that guy was and she replies “huh? Wait what? You’re telling me you got videos from a random number?! And it had a perfect man’s body with a horse cock?! Lol babe i dunno what websites you’ve been visiting but i’d imagine it’s something to do with that!🤣 What?! u think i’m cheating on you with an old friend or something?! jk! Love u babe”

I hang up the phone and immediately get the same text with the same address, i look up the address to find a really really nice hotel is there. Then another text comes through simply saying “penthouse suite, beta cuck”

Then another text….just a screenshot of a receipt from stub hub for tickets to the nuggets game that night, 5:10pm. 2 tickets, $250 each, wow, better than i’ve ever had for sure.

Then one more text again with the hotels address, saying “ur welcome to stop by whenever, but i suggest you either wait for us to get there or something. not getting up to open the door if we busy fuckin. Can’t wait to see your bitch ass cry🤣”

This one hits me like a ton of bricks and it’s feeling more n more that it’s gotta be exactly what it seems….but no way she’d do this to me!

The great part of our relationship is complete and total honesty and openness! My gf, allison is kinky and loves to be a dirty slut, and we have talked about her fucking others, maybe even a gangbang!

But we’d only done a handful of super kinky things….we’re both submissive so it’s kinda hard to push it and try really crazy n kinky things….we both need that more aggressive attitude!

But i know she loves me deeply. We’ve such an intensely strong emotional connection, more than either of us ever have!

Still no word from my gf and it’s 8pm. At 9pm she finally texts me but it’s the exact same as from the other phone number and it’s just the hotel address and room number…..I call her back, and it rings and rings until going to voicemail. Maybe she didn’t hear it, i call again…it rings 3-4times, less than the last time, then goes to voicemail. I try again and it rings twice then voicemail….Again, same thing. I call yet AGAIN, prob the 6th time and it goes straight to voicemail!

I check the phone locator app and see her phone was at ball arena(nuggets play there)the length of the game….and moved to exactly where the hotel is.

I get dressed, now fearing the worst, but thinking “ok this makes no sense! Either she’s playing some joke on me; something weird like that or some surprise for me?”But i do realize that the most likely thing is…maybe she’s been partying with her friend, she cheated and isn’t sure how to deal with me…..But what’s up with the pics etc? ofc she’s aware of my pervy kinks etc, and she’s prob making it seem like she’s cheating on me, i’m hoping!

I walk to the light rail station, and get on the train….Ugh yeh don’t have the money to get an uber…i checked my bet365 account to see its at zero!

Wtf?! I had some futures bets….ones i could cash out for about $250 total, but they were all just cashed out! i’ve not one bet at all and no money here!

I see that $800 was withdrawn and my bank account was credited $800! But $500 used for the tickets, and $300 spent at some weird fancy store downtown.

Ok that’s it i’ve gotta see what’s up as i’m sitting on the train, mind running wild. Fuck, i gotta get off and walk 20mins, then get a bus!

I get off the train, walking to the bus stop…..Bus finally comes and oh fuck, as i’m tryna buy a bus ticket on the app(for $2.75) It dawns on me “fuck i don’t have enough money in my account” i look at the driver and say “i’m not sure why it’s not working” he looks at it and says “yeah cuz you’re card is being declined, sorry” and closes the doors.

I’m defeated and want to cry. Looking at google, i see it’ll take 2.5 hours to walk there….

It’s now almost 10pm and i consider going back home, but then wtf?! I can’t just sit at home wondering wtf is going on!

So i walk and walk…i watch the clip again and again of the perfect man’s body, fantasizing that the woman i’m in love with is cheating on me in the meanest way possible….Finally, it’s after midnight and I arrive at the hotel….I ask the front desk how to get to the penthouse, and she tells me “the elevator is right over there, but Sir, there isn’t anyone staying there right now”

I thank her and walk away tryna figure out what to do.

I text my gf asking why she texted me that address. she texts back right away with another address! I lose it and call a few times, each time it’s sent to voicemail. I text her back yelling “OK WTF is going on?! What’s your problem? Tell me what’s happening right fucking now!”

She texts back “i’m sorry sweetie, i didn’t mean to upset you! Just having fun with my friend, sorry guess i didn’t realize….I’ll be home tonight, but we’re out, omg babe i’m so drunk! I’ll see you at home, probably late!”

So i begin to walk back home…and remember the light rail isn’t running anymore….Now, I’ve got a 3.5 hour walk!

Finally i arrive home, it rained a little and i’m soaked, socks wet, and miserable and exhausted….

I open the door and hear slurping sounds and my gf giggling. My heart sinks and i already know what’s happening….I yell “wtf are you laughing about?! The fuck is wrong with you, ur being a fucking bitch!”

And i see the same man from the clips emerge from my bedroom, butt naked….he’s holding my favorite shirt, sweat dripping off his immaculate body and he wipes it off, then wipes his asshole with it, now it has skidmarks and throws it at me, saying “wtf did you say bitch?”

I ask who he is and what he’s doing at my place he replies “whatever tf i feel like doing faggot!” I say no it’s my place, and no i’m not gay” i emphasize gay, since i’m not a fan of bigotry and homophobia…”yeh didn’t say your gay, but you ARE a bitch ass faggot! Wtf you gonna do about it, huh? that’s wtf i thought, now, on your knees…obey or i’m gonna beat you up so badly….maybe you’ll get outta the hospital by the time i get out of jail, but it’s your choice” while making his pecs bounce in a very intimidating way. he walks up to me cracking his knuckles saying “ya know, i really DO hope you put up a fight; nobody ever wants to fight me” I look him up and down, knowing he’d kill me quickly….He’s gotta be a foot taller than me….im 5’9 and he’s gotta be at least 6’6!

I ask if i can take my shoes and wet socks off first and he laughs then slaps me in the face, open handed but hard, immediately followed by a left handed slap, i lose my balance and stumble to my knees, then i say “ok ok” on my knees looking up at him.

“Thank me for bullying you. Do it bitch” i thank him, he laughs, spits on me and gives me a wedgie….i make noise indicating it’s hurting, and he proceeds to give me an atomic wedgie…laughs then demands i take my clothes off but keep my wet socks on….

He laughs hysterically at my dick and shouts “baby, how tf were you actually fucking THIS?! omfg, ok come on slut”

And i see my love…she’s crawling on all fours..crawls up to this greek god and begins kissing his feet. She works her way up his legs, as she kisses and licks literally every inch of his perfect body.

Ali then says “ok now, don’t make me tell you again”

She looks me directly in my eyes “Bobby, keep looking in my eyes, ali says we must keep eye contact and he’s in charge here, ok? Please listen to what he says, i don’t want you to get hurt, i really don’t…not physically anyway. I say that because i i i DO want you to get emotionally hurt. I am sorry but when Ali told me he wanted to fuck me, i told him about you. Over months he kept teasing me for fucking such a loser; i love you but you are a loser. He’s been sending me pics of him, and the girls he fucks and omg babe, they cum so hard, and I fondly remembered being fucked by ali. I broke up with him cuz he cheated constantly and i thought that wasn’t ok, Now i realize how superior he is. It’s a small price to pay to be allowed to touch a superior man, im sure you understand. After i admitted how badly i wanted him he began insulting you and making fun of you. He made me take pics and record our sex, and that’s why i haven’t cum in so long, he said i wasn’t allowed with a loser like you. Ali is a sadist, he loves to make women worship him and loves nothing more than breaking beta men like you. That’s not an insult; you’re a beta, he’s an alpha, ya know?

He’s been planning for months to do this….it’s his masterpiece of destroying a loser!”

By this time i’m crying, tears streaming down my face…

“now bobby, we’re recording all of this and you’re now going to thank ali for making your fantasies come true. I know it hurts; the goal is to break you. Ali and i will marry, and you will work for us and live in a tiny room in the basement. U will be used and abused. I know it hurts but this is your new life now. Sure you can run away or something, but then ali will send all the vids and clips to your entire contact list.

But right now you’re going to beg ali to let you eat his sweaty asshole, do it you fucking piece of shit!” By this time ali is rubbing her pussy with his foot and it’s making her horny af….mmm fuck, i fucking hate you loser!” And she spits on me, confusing and hurting me.

I begin to beg to eat his asshole….

And wow, I began this planning on just whining about being so sad and pathetic but then wrote all this…wow i’ve got issues

#findom humiliation #beta bitch #loser abuse #loser humiliation #self humiliation #degrade and humiliate me #findom addiction #beta #verbal humiliation #pathetic loser #alpha man #beta loser #pathetic men #pathetic sissy #beta slave #pussy free loser #gross loser #humiliation task

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m-ayo-o · 10 months

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Mr. Fushiguro [I]

flirtation and humiliation with your professor part one | part two wc 2200

You have a meeting with Mr. Fushiguro, your personal tutor, this afternoon regarding your dissertation. You're dreading it a little, not only because you're unsure what your project will be, but Mr. Fushiguro is also incredibly intimidating and attractive. You often feel nervous during his seminars, or passing him in the corridor, but being alone with him makes you pretty anxious.

Despite feeling nervous, you arrive outside his office a few minutes early so as not to displease him. He hates tardiness. It seems as though he can hear you hovering outside his door as your knuckles hesitate inches from the wood. “You coming in or what?” You hear his deep voice, muffled from the inside.

You enter, a little startled, and step up to his desk as he flicks through some paperwork. He looks up at you as you stand fidgeting near the chairs on the opposite side of the desk. “Sit.” He mutters and returns to his work. The quick glance he gives you with his striking green eyes is enough to make your heart rate increase as you take your seat.

You feel intimidated by everything he does, everything he says, and it's like he knows you're so weak for him. The way you blush under his gaze and your shy glances at him give you away. You also avoid spending time with him alone, not without him noticing of course.

In fact, he notices and takes advantage of this. He often requests that you stay behind after lectures, just so he can talk to you some more, usually about your studies or just pointless small talk. He enjoys watching you squirm.

But today he can't be avoided. You fiddle with your skirt and wait patiently for him to finish what he's doing. As the clock ticks over to 4pm Mr. Fushiguro sets down his papers he was marking and straightens up in his chair, looking up at you with his piercing green eyes.

“Y/n,” he greets you like he's only just seen you, “remind me what our meeting is about today.”

“I need to decide… what my dissertation project will be, sir,” you reply.

He taps his pen on the table, “Mm hmm. That should be easy for someone like you,” he strokes his neck then stretches his arms over his head, desperate to move after sitting down for too long.

“So, have you had any thoughts, y/n?” You look down, feeling flustered as his muscles flex, his shirt pulling tight over his chest. “Um…” You murmur and twist your hair.

“Look, did you come here for a chat or not?” He asks flatly. Mr. Fushiguro is impatient and snappy at times, which adds to his intimidating personality.

“S-sir, it’s not that I–” you start, unable to find your words as you look up at him again, watching his lips curl into a slight smirk. He’s enjoying the embarrassed look on your face as you can barely look into his eyes.

“So, what is it then?” His voice sounds rough and deep. You look down into your lap again, then try to look up at him, “I, I– I’m sorry, sir. I’m a little stuck for ideas at the moment. Can we discuss this over email?” You blurt out your excuses, unable to withstand his intense glaring for a second longer as you suddenly stand and turn, ready to bolt for the door.

“Y/n.” Mr. Fushiguro’s deep voice stops you in your tracks. He steps around his desk and sits on the edge as you turn to face him. He raises his finger and beckons for you to come back. “I told you to sit. I don’t remember permitting you to leave just yet,” he says as you step back towards him, your legs quivering as you fight the urge to run.

He pats the chair that’s right below him now, encouraging you to sit in front of him again– this time much closer. Although you feel like you're being ensnared in some kind of trap, you sit and peer up at him as he gets comfy on his desk, one leg lazily dangling off the edge as the other props him up. His trousers fit him so well– you can see his defined thigh muscles as the material stretches over him.

“If you’re not going to talk, then I’ll have to start.” He looks down at you with a smile. “I’ll begin with a question– one that you should easily be able to answer. Why do you act like this around me, y/n?” He asks as if it’s the simplest question in the world.

“A-act like what, sir…?” you trail off, realising that he’s going to be dissatisfied by this non-answer. “Don’t answer my question with another question, y/n.” He snaps predictably, furrowing his eyebrows. He waits, tapping a big finger on the wooden desk and raising an eyebrow at you. You know he won’t repeat himself.

“Ok, I’ll try an easier question.” His expression shifts from displeased to curious as he peers down at your blushing face. “Do you find me attractive?” You look down as your hand covers your face. “I-I…” you stumble. “It’s very simple. Yes or no, y/n.”

“Mr. Fushiguro… I, I…” you feel so embarrassed– he must get a lot of attention like this and you figure he might be fed up with it by now; young, inexperienced women fawning over him, unable to express their feelings to him. You presume that he finds it all very bothersome and tiring.

So you try your best to get your head clear and speak to him properly. “Yes, sir.” You say quietly as you look up at him again. “Very good.” He praises you, smiling slightly at your answer. “Now, another question: do you want to fuck me?” He asks flatly.

You can’t help but take your bottom lip between your teeth, looking up at him pleadingly as if to say, please don’t make me answer that. He’s just doing this to humiliate me. You think as you put off answering him for just a little longer.

But his intense eye contact indicates that he wants you to answer right now. You nod, looking away from his eyes. He sighs and taps his finger on the desk, waiting for you to answer him properly.

You sigh, your cheeks and nose blushing pink. “Use your words, y/n. You’re usually very good at expressing your thoughts in class.” He encourages you.

“Yes, sir…” you manage, feeling totally overwhelmed with shame. You can’t believe he made you admit that. Out loud. You just want to disappear. “Well done. Now that we have that cleared up, would you like to talk about your dissertation project with me?” He asks, sounding insincere as a snarky smile spreads over his features.

He knows you can barely form sentences right now, let alone think about your third year research project that will carry most of your grade for your final year and overall degree. You let out a sad sigh, “I, I don’t think I can… right now…” you admit as you look down. You must look pitiful. That just adds to your embarrassment.

“So, you want me to fuck you first, then talk about your project?” Your heart skips a beat. What the fuck did he just say? Your mind is racing– you presume you didn’t hear him right as you look up at him with wide and confused eyes. There’s a long pause before you murmur, “E-excuse me, sir?” You feel your lip trembling.

He really doesn’t like repeating himself. He just sighs through his nose, his patience clearly wearing thin. He gazes over your body, his eyes trailing up your long legs and hovering over your short skirt. His eyes snap up to meet yours, “If you’re having trouble with that, perhaps you shouldn’t be on my course.” He hisses, looking down at you menacingly.

“Y-yes…” you manage, your voice wavering as you don’t know what he’ll do once you’ve answered. He’ll probably kick me out, or maybe he’ll remove me from his course.

“Yes, what?” You can’t take it anymore; the long pauses, the deafening silence, his fierce glaring have all got you feeling feverish. You close your eyes tight, “I want you to fuck me first, Mr. Fushiguro!” You blurt out, finding it easier to talk with your eyes closed.

“That wasn’t too hard, was it?” He asks, then pauses, tapping his lip with a big finger. “Shall we see just how badly you want to fuck?” He almost lets out a chuckle, his scar curling over his lips.

You’re so close to letting out a whine as you wait silently in trepidation. “What shall I have you do… ah, first please lock the door, y/n.” You sigh in relief and stand to complete your task.

“Ah, ah…” he stops you, shaking his head, “on your knees.” He sneers. Fuck. You should’ve known it wouldn’t have been that easy. Your big eyes look into his, silently asking him do I really have to do this? “If you don’t want to do it, you can leave.” He says simply, giving you your answer.

You turn and try to pull down your skirt a little, earning a low chuckle from your professor as you look back at him with wide eyes. You know he won’t budge. He’s made up his mind and he’s going to have some fun with you before he fucks you. You’re not even sure if he will fuck you.

You slowly bend down and get on your knees as you begin crawling towards the door. You lock it, turn to face Mr. Fushiguro again and start to stand up. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t say a thing, but his piercing eyes stare you down, forcing you back onto your knees. He intimidates you so much.

“C-can I stand up, sir?” He just shakes his head, his eyes following you as you reluctantly lean over, revealing your cleavage to him as your shirt drops.

In the meantime, he’s tilted the blinds and turned on his desk lamp, illuminating the room as you kneel near your chair, wanting to stand up. He looks down at you with a smirk as he’s ready to give you your next instruction.

He makes you tidy his desk, organise his papers, books and stationary. Although this situation is embarrassing, you’re very aware of the fact that he’s turning you on by ordering you around. He’s getting you hot without even touching you.

Next he asks you to sit in his chair and unbutton your shirt. You’re a little hesitant, but you comply, unfastening each button slowly, pausing as you reach just above your bra. “Did I tell you to stop?” He asks, his gaze unfaltering.

You undo one more button then hear a knock at the door. You freeze, sitting below Mr. Fushiguro as he leans on his desk, “Answer it.” Your fingers frantically attempt to button up your shirt. Mr. Fushiguro clicks his tongue, demanding your attention as your eyes dart up to his.

“Did you hear me say ‘do up your shirt then answer the door’?” You shake your head. “No, you didn’t. So answer it like that. You can walk this time.”

Your shirt is barely covering your lacy bra underneath as you answer the door and explain that Mr. Fushiguro is busy. You make some excuses as you quickly close and lock the door again, stepping back towards his desk.

You feel your professor's eyes all over you as you walk towards him. He stops you halfway back and makes you hike up your skimpy skirt. “I can’t believe you decided to wear that to my office.” He shames you for wearing the short skirt, which is kind of revealing (but really cute).

He hands you some books and asks you to place them on the second to top shelf on his bookcase. You can just about reach, tiptoeing and stretching up, but the reason he asked you to do this is becoming apparent as you feel your skirt lifting up further, exposing your cute underwear as your back arches, your ass pushing out.

You're really struggling with one of the books. It's so heavy, your delicate fingertips are having trouble pushing it the last few centimetres onto the shelf. The book suddenly slips from your fingers and falls to the floor, making a loud slamming noise in the quiet office.

You hurriedly bend over to pick it up and try again, but you can hear Mr. Fushiguro clicking his tongue behind you. “That's an expensive edition, y/n. Let me see it.”

You step over to him, his large frame looming over you as you hand him the book, his fingers brushing over yours. He examines the cover, “Looks like you'll have to be punished.” He shrugs and sighs, setting it on his desk.

You try to make your excuses but your professor isn't listening. He beckons for you to come closer. This is the closest you've ever got to Mr. Fushiguro; you feel his breath fanning you and you notice the faintest wrinkles on his handsome face. You stare up at him with wide eyes, daring to meet his.

pt two 💞

toji | m.list

#toji fushiguro smut #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #professor crush #humiliation k!nk #toji x you #toji x reader #toji x self insert #teacher x student #teacher smut

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