#screw you wolf spiders | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ice-cream-writes-stuff · 11 months

Text

■□▪︎COURTING▪︎□■ Part 1

{Miguel O'hara/Reader}

《You decided to screw around with biology/Your attempts at trying to wooTHEE Miguel O'hara.》

"Pav, Hobbie, Gwen! Hiya!" Your enthusiastic voice calls out to the younger Spiderlings. Jess, who sees you happily taking the teens in a group hug. It catches Miles off guard but reciprocates the hug. Gwen flinches, but relaxes in your hold. While Pav snuggles into your warmth, Hobbie groans playfully, patting you on the back.

You chuckle and let them go, before smiling brightly at Jess and waving at her stomach. "Hi little buggy! Your mom is doing an amazing job! Don't make it hard for her!" You tease, causing Jess to lightly chuckle at your antics.

˚Female Wolf Spiders have a strong attachment to their children since they (unlike most spiders) carry them around in their egg sac and do not abandon them. They even protect their newborns after they hatch."

"So... How did the first mission go?" You said warmly, gazing at the teens pridefully. Miles smiles, chatting excitedly. Even pulling out a small art book he had brought with him, drawing a small doodle of what the villain looked like.

"Oh, oh!" Pav excitedly raises his hand, taking your attention.

"Yes?"

"How's it been going with getting the bossmans attention?" Hobbie interrupts with a playful smile directed at Pavitr. "I wanted to ask that!" Pavitr whines as all the young Spiderlings gaze at you.

Jess laughs as you smile happily.

"It's been going well! I think-" You pause as a small noise alerts you.

"I'll have to tell ya'll later, I was assigned another mission, see you soon!"

As soon as you left, Miles turns the page of the paper as little notes and comments are written all over the place. A small doodle of Miguel in his spider suit glaring at you in your own spider suit.

"It oddly feels like bingo.." Gwen remarks. Laughing slightly at her own set of notes, she added.

"I mean, you can't blame us! (Y/N) is literally pulling out all the tricks to get Miguel!" Pavitr says, adding a small heart between the two doodles of you and Miguel.

■ Attempt one!■

Males in a few species locate a female and unceremoniously run to her and mate, others court by rhythmically plucking the threads of a web. After the female approaches, he pats and strokes her before mating.

After a long and stressful mission and capturing another anomaly. Your team follows behind you, groaning tiredly and a bit slow to your up-beat pace.

"Miguel~!"

The futuristic Spider-Man eyes your group, nodding to them for their job well done.

Miguel then growls when feeling you pounce on his unmoving body. You hug his waist tightly as Lyla snidely. Your group, afraid of your well-being, beg you to let go. Fearing that he'd kill you, or the more plausible idea, throw you into a wall.

Miguel scoffs as your grip becomes tighter, struggling to get you off of him as you squeal happily.

■Attempt two!■

Wolf Spiders perform a mating ritual that are a combination of visual display and vibrations akin to a courtship song. IF the female denies, she may eat the male.

You twirl and swing beautifully in the air, singing to the song playing in the background as you and Miguel track down a music themed Vulture.

When a male jumping spider encounters a female—literally any female—he launches into an elaborate courtship dance, including rhythmic flailing of limbs and complex vibrations.

Miguel rolls his eyes at your small movements that look like you were dancing. Your groove, not being thrown off as you manage to pull Miguel into a clumsy one-sided waltz as you kick the (finally) tied down Vulture.

His mean comments not helping your dancing as Miguel quietly chuckles at your actions.

[Part two will be released soon! This is gonna be probably one of my best series yet! Taglist is open for ONE HOUR. Comments are highly appreciated and need to keep this series going! Thank you guys so much!]

(Also, (Y/N) is GN! Miggy is male.)

2K notes · View notes

storiesbyrhi · 2 months

Text

Witch!Reader x Bat/Vampire!Eddie Munson Series Masterlist The Grimoire The Timeline

Warnings: canon typical violence, horror genre typical violence/some infrequent gore, swearing, animal death, no beta, death in childbirth (mentioned, not described), abusive parents, suicide, spiders/bugs, grief/mourning; light smut; warnings updated each chapter.

Synopsis: No witch has stepped foot in Hawkins since 1845, but when Vecna opens the ground and poisons the town, a voice begins to call to you. Have you been brought back to this cursed place to heal the townspeople’s wounds, to save a hexed bat that always finds its way to you, or to redefine your history with a reunion 150 years in the making?

Chapter Summary: Homeward bound. 2738 words.

1986

Every now and then, you’d catch a glimpse of Eddie swooping by, keeping pace with your car. It was mid-afternoon by the time he grew tired, burrowing into his front seat nest and sleeping until twilight. As soon as the sun was safely locked away on the other side of the world, Eddie chittered and you responded by turning him back into himself.

He stretched out, making dramatic noises and pulling faces.

“You okay there?” you asked him, laughing at the show of it all.

“Only trying to make you smile, my little witch.”

Damn.

“So, you were right,” you changed the subject. “About not being the only non-witch,”

“Wolf, right? I could smell him.” Eddie’s face screwed up in disgust.

“What happened to the support group for monster lovers?”

“I draw the line at lycans.”

The seriousness of his expression made you laugh. “Well, you’ll have to redraw it, because Ev has it bad for him. The others already knew all about it too,”

“And we believed we were special,”

“I mean… We still are… Witches and werewolves aren’t mortal enemies…”

“Of course. Wolves’ mortal enemy being their own tail and all,”

“Eddie! Stop,” you laughed, hitting him with the back of your hand.

He grinned at you, then looked out at the road. “And the other?”

“That one is a bit more of a secret. Ash is seeing one of the fae folk. It’s still very new. Taking it slow… Making sure they’re not actually trying to lure her into some centuries old curse. You know how they are,”

“Trickster sprites,”

“Exactly,” you nodded. “And then there’s Steve fucking Harrington… who has elected to inexplicably haunt Mel,”

“Why? I assume he never met her,”

“Yep, but she came and asked me if the ghost in her house was him. It was. He says he’ll leave her alone but had this stupid puppy dog look on his face… So… Maybe there is a whole new world of witch romances to come.”

Eddie grinned, he liked the sound of it. Though, he really didn’t want a werewolf as a brother-in-law. “Do you want me to take over?” he asked then, pointing to the steering wheel. “I’ve been practicing,”

“And here I was thinking you disappeared in the middle of the night to eat,”

“Oh, I do. I find the worst person I can. I eat them. Then, I take their car for a lesson,”

“A two birds, one stone, kind of thing, huh?”

Eddie nodded with a disconcertingly innocent smile on his face.

“I was thinking about that actually. I think I can help,”

“With which part?” he asked. “The eating or the thieving,”

“Neither. The choosing.”

The joy left Eddie’s expression. He looked away from you, suddenly studying the hardly visible horizon out his window. “You don’t need to be a part of it. You don’t have to have it on your conscience,”

“Neither do you. Not in the same way, at least. What if I can take some of the guesswork out of picking who is, you know, bad,”

“It’s not guesswork. I watch them. I find them while they’re-”

“I know. But what if you didn’t have to wait for them to do something bad? What if you could tell what they had already done?”

Eddie stayed quiet. There was a gas station up ahead, the lights shining brightly. You pulled in and cut the engine.

“I know it’s always going to be on you. You’re always going to have to make that call, about if they have sinned and if the sins are…”

“If they justify death,” Eddie finished for you solemnly and still not looking at you.

“Yes. But what if you could see them? The sins. If you could, I don’t know, just touch someone and see the worst of them. And only when you wanted to. Would that help?”

He was clicking two fingernails together, pensive or maybe anxious. Eddie got out of the car and looked around. There was a family inside the gas station. The kids were screaming about peanut butter cups and soda.

“Would it help you?” he asked after you’d got out and walked around to him. His hands were shoved into the pockets of the sweatpants he’d been getting in and out of, vampire then bat then vampire then bat. “It might make it more precise. But it’s still conjecture. Still a judgment. Still a human death.”

You tried to read him, but he’d locked you out for the moment.

He continued, “Sometimes it hurts. Or, sometimes I think it hurts. Or, I think it should hurt. I don’t know if I can tell the difference. I don’t want to hurt anybody. I can stop myself from hurting them. But I don’t know, really know, if it weighs on my conscious. I don’t even know if I have one.”

It had been easy to get lost in Eddie’s goodness. It had been the important thing to show your coven. But it was never going away, the darkness. He might have been a good vampire, not a properly made monster, but it didn’t change the fact that he was still a vampire.

“If I say it would help me-”

“Then, I am sure, it would help me. What is good for you is good for me,” Eddie told you. “But I can tell which of them are more like me than you. I can see it in their faces. But if this makes you feel more in control of it, then I’ll do anything you ask of me.”

The neon sign of the station buzzed and crackled, the cicadas trilling back at it. The family got in their car and hit the road again, the radio turned right up to drown out the noise of bickering children.

You could see the station’s clerk watching you and Eddie from behind his counter.

“Loving you doesn’t make me feel guilty. I’m not ashamed of what you are,” you told Eddie then, looking back at him. “I’m not trying to make you into something you’re not.”

He nodded. “I know.” He saw it on your face, a flash of exasperation. “What are you trying to do?” he asked. “Because I’m not ashamed of what you are either… You don’t have to be a lawful, virtuous witch.”

There was a small smile playing on Eddie’s lips and you knew it meant he’d cottoned on to the fact that the seed of darkness that lived inside you was working its magic.

“It’s not just about making things easier for you or for me. It could be… A kind of justice…”

“Ohhh,” Eddie almost laughed. “I am your weapon, and if you can point this blade in the right direction, then well fuck, it might work faster than the humans’ courts and witches’ spells?”

Eddie had only recently started to swear, a habit he was picking up from you most likely. Fuck, in particular, sounded terribly good coming from his mouth.

You looked at him and slowly nodded. He threw his head back and laughed into the night. The gas station clerk sighed in relief at the sudden change of atmosphere around you both.

“Oh, my little witch. You do continue to delight me.”

Eddie pulled you into a rough kiss, letting the tips of his sharpest teeth run along your bottom lip. You were warm and tasted so sugary. He had been itching to eat you up since leaving the Catskills.

“I love you,” you said breathlessly when he let you come up for air.

“I love you too. Entirely.”

…

Waking up alone was bittersweet. Although you missed the weight of Eddie next to you, the immediate crawl of his body to yours, it did mean he was likely up to something. Mostly, it was innocent domestic work.

Pre-turning, Eddie never really had a place to call his own. As a vampire, the idea of home meant something different too. But now, the boy could nest. He cleaned and picked flowers to put in vases and glasses all across the trailer. He was also dabbling in cooking, though he could not eat the fruits of his labor.

So, mostly, it was domestic work, but now and then, you would wake up to him doing something different. A week after returning from the Catskills, you and Eddie had fallen back into routine, but this morning was out of the ordinary.

Eddie had stacks of books crowded around him. Pages of handwritten notes were spilled across the coffee table, your altar supplies stacked neatly below it.

“Looking very witchy there,” you greeted, voice gravelly with sleep.

“Hi, my love,” he replied without looking up. “I’m almost finished.”

Looking around, you realised it wasn’t just the books Eddie had been combing through. Herbs and other potion-brewing bits and pieces were lined up along the kitchen bench.

“Almost finished what?” you asked.

“The spell.”

Nodding slowly at him, you waited for the explanation. It never came. Instead, you let him work on his craft and went about your day.

By mid-morning, he was ready.

“Little witch!” Eddie yelled loudly. You were outside, watering your potted plants and herbs. “Little witch! Come!” There was childlike enthusiasm in his voice and it made you smile.

“Where do you need me?” you asked him, but he was already ushering you to the couch.

“I have written you a grounding spell,” he announced.

“A grounding spell?”

“Yes. Something to reconnect you to the natural world. To promote health and healing.”

Eddie was wide-eyed and on the verge of mania. He had a little dirt smeared across his cheek, and it was caked under his nails. Although his hair was pulled back in a bun, single coils of curls had fallen out throughout the night. He was beautiful.

“Go on,” you urged.

“It starts with malus domestica,” he began.

“It always does,” you noted, already holding back a giggle. He could have just said apple. Still so very dramatic.

“They connect you to the earth. Sacred. Biblical.” He really had been doing his homework. “Then, black hellebore root.” Eddie was at the kitchen bench, holding up a jar that he’d already dug through. That explained the dirt.

“I hope you’ve been careful with that,” you warned.

“I know. Extremely toxic. Even witches sometimes wear gloves to handle it,” Eddie said, reciting one of the books he’d read. “But it is also symbolic of rising from the past. And has a long history of use in witchcraft.”

Eddie had read about hellebore poisoning, how it brought on hallucinations but could also cure mental affliction. He read about how it could be harnessed and used in banishing spells and for purification. About white versus black hellebore and all the folklore surrounding them.

“Okay. What do we do with this apple and root?” you asked, playing the part of a captive audience.

“Core the apple and thread the root through it. Let it air overnight, by moonlight. Come morning, it gets wrapped in willow then cooked,”

“Willow?” you tested.

“Willow that is strong and true. Willow that takes pain and fever and grief and releases you from it.”

You nodded and smiled.

“When the apple is cooked through, falling apart, you take the hellebore root and powder it,”

“Then what?”

Eddie hesitated. “Alas, I do not know…” he admitted. “I can’t find a way to close the spell,”

“Do you have any ideas?” you asked, standing up and coming to the kitchen counter. You looked at everything he had pulled out of the apothecary.

“Moreso, bad ideas. What not to do. Consume it, for example,”

“Yeah. That could kill me. Maybe even turn me into a werewolf,” you joked. The look on Eddie’s face was priceless. “Kidding. Hellebore is an active ingredient in lycanthropic ointment though… Mostly it’s used in what we used to call flying ointment, or magic salve. So no, I cannot consume it,”

“Yes… Well… I thought then, returning it to the earth. Burying it. That didn’t feel right,”

“Mmmhmm… I think you have a clue here,” you told him, pulling a bowl of eucalyptus seed pods forward. “Did you read about these?”

Eddie shook his head.

“They’re kind of amazing. Eucalyptus trees are native to Australia, but are planted ornamentally around the U.S. They produce a highly combustible oil through their leaves. Little fire bombs, basically. They catch ablaze easily. But, these little seedpods are fireproof, and when threatened with fire, they drop lots of seeds and fertilise the scorched ground. Within a couple of years, the burnt earth is already returning to its gloriously green form,”

“Very smart of them,”

“Very smart,” you agreed. “Maybe we can learn from them. We can not just withstand the blaze, but add fuel, let it all burn, and start again,”

“The powder… we let it go free…” Eddie said slowly, catching on to what you’re saying.

“Ah-huh. We give it to the wind.”

Working side by side, you and Eddie cored apples and filled the void with black hellebore root. You set them on the kitchen windowsill ready for the moonlight. (You’d have to take down all the window’s covers though, sunproof house and all.)

Eddie was proud. It was written all over his face.

“Now who’s the little witch?” you whispered to him, stepping up to his body, pressing yours to his.

In reply, Eddie pulled you close, wrapping his arms tightly around your frame. He kissed the top of your head then pressed his cheek to it, resting on you.

“Thank you. Nobody has ever written a spell for me before… Well… Not a good one…” You looked up at him. “You are good, Eddie. And you’re allowed to be. You can be… both. Everything,”

“Everything,” he repeated quietly.

“Yeah… So… What now? We can’t work on them until tomorrow.”

Eddie swept you off to the bedroom by the time you opened your eyes after your next blink.

“But it’s not bedtime,” you said voice saccharine and purposefully dumb.

Eddie grinned. “It’s not. I don’t want you to go to sleep now anyway,”

“No?” You sat on the edge of the unmade bed, looking up at Eddie.

He stood between your legs, reaching out to cup your face in his hands, his thumbs running softly across your skin. He smiled wide, teeth sharp. “I’m very, very hungry.”

Eddie rarely let himself taste your blood, though the occurrences were becoming more regular. He was scared of a multitude of things. Not being able to stop. Seeing something in your magic blood he couldn’t unsee. Pissing off some ancient and unknown creature that would resurrect if ever a vampire munched on a witch.

Sometimes, if you begged pretty enough, you’d get a small bite out of him. But it was better when he came asking for it. The soft inner thigh was his greatest weakness.

Lifting your arms up, Eddie followed the instruction and took your shirt off. You fell back against the bed and let him push your skirt up. He dropped to his knees and kissed the tops of your thighs. Up, up, up, until his mouth was bruising the skin above where the femoral artery was pumping blood.

You still didn’t know how he did it, how he could make it feel so good. You didn’t want to know. It was his own secret vampire magic and it was one mystery that would never appear on your murder board.

Eddie’s teeth sank in and your hot, red blood began to flow. He pushed you further back on the bed, then held your leg up, so the blood would pour down towards where you were already wet. His tongue lapped at blood and arousal fast. He didn’t waste a single drop.

You writhed under him, eyes screwed shut, and body on fire. The vibration of his tongue was pulling you ever closer to climax, but he wouldn’t stay in one spot long enough to let you get there.

Eddie grabbed your hand and smashed it to where he’d bitten you. “Heal it,” he growled, barely able to form words. You did what he said and he licked your palm clean of blood as a thank you. He hooked his arms under your legs and ripped you back to the edge of the bed. Then, he was positioned exactly where he needed to be to let you get there.

End Note: We're back in Hawkins... Now what? Reblogs and comments are appreciated!

Fic Taglist: @paranoidmunson @idkidknemore @paprikaquinn @stardustworlds @loz-brooke @wyverntatty @vintagehellfire @dark-academia-slut @scarletwitchwhore @becks1002 @mrsdollardog @heyndrix @luceneraium @rosaline-black @devilinthepalemoonlite @goldencherriess @iamwhisperingstars @wiltedwonderland @blueywrites @breezybeesposts @jadehowlettthewolf @spikesvamp79 @foreveranexpatsposts @tortoiseshellspells @wingedpeachjudgegiant @stardustmunson @live-love-be-unique @fangirling-4-ever @reanimated-alice @b-irock @gh0stlybunnie @myown-worstenemy-2003 @woozzz @cyberxlust @hiscrimsonangel @buckysbarne @m00nlight101 @word-wytch @spicysix @briasnow-blog @goth-cowgirl-03

All Eddie Taglist: @solomons-finest-rum @ruinedbythehobbit @sweetpeapod @thorfemmes @corrodedhawkins @grungegrrrl @lilzabob @averagemisfit03 @ches-86 @ilovecupcakesandtea @onehotgreasymechanic @hazydespair @mel-the-fangirl @eddies-hid3out @siren-lungs @aheadfullofsteverogers @hiscrimsonangel @dashingdeb16 @cultish-corner

#Mine #Burning Yarrow #Eddie Munson #Vampire!Eddie Munson #Bat!Eddie Munson #Eddie Munson/You #Eddie Munson x You #Eddie Munson/Reader #Eddie Munson x Reader

85 notes · View notes

trollprincess · 3 months

Text

So I think the Academy may have screwed over “Oppenheimer.”

Now I know what you’re thinking. “Wait, what are you talking about? Did you miss the Barbie snubs? Are you paying attention?” Yup, I’m totally paying attention. Let me explain.

This year’s crop of Best Picture nominees is very good. There’s not a one that doesn’t make me immediately flinch as to why it’s even there. There are some I might have added (“The Boy and the Heron” and “Across the Spider-verse” both deserve to be there, for example), but this is a good list. Not just by Academy standards, which can be questionable as hell, but by anyone’s standard.

Up until now, “Oppenheimer” has pretty much been a lock for this. It’s very well made, acted, directed, written, all of it. It’s good. It deserves it.

But. BUT.

Final voting is between February 22nd and 27th this year. So that’s an entire month of press and interviews and predictions and whatnot. And already the big story is not “Oppenheimer has 13 nominations.” It’s “Why the fuck weren’t Margot Robbie and Greta Gerwig nominated for best actress and best director for Barbie?!”

And the thing is, they DID get nominated - Margot for producing and Greta for writing. Which is not me dismissing the fact they *should* have gotten nominated for directing and acting. (Note: There will be no Ryan Gosling shaming in this house. He deserves his nomination. So does America Ferrera. This is not a case of “only the man got the nomination.” Don’t erase America’s well-deserved nomination.)

So back to Greta and Margot. The next few weeks are going to be the Hollywood media asking “Did the Academy fuck up?” about their nominations. Did they not get the point of the movie? How does one of the best movies of the year not get a nomination for it lead actress and female director? Did Oppenheimer only get so much attention riding on “Barbenheimer”’s coattails? (Monetarily, oh, yeah. Awards show-wise, no.) Like, today we’re talking about their snubs, but it’s not going to stop today. There’s going to be discourse and prediction discussion and “Annette Bening stole Margot’s nomination” bullshit probably.

Basically, the Academy accidentally made the fact it snubbed Margot and Greta the story, and not the fact three other movies got more nominations than “Barbie,” including the likely winner of Best Picture.

The next part depends on if Hollywood can feel guilt and shame. So, you know, it’s anybody’s guess. But directors only voted for directing nominees, and actors only voted for acting nominees. Everybody gets to vote for best film.

Now, here’s the thing. Even IF they got nominated for directing and acting, they wouldn’t have won. Actress is between Gladstone and Stone (I’m hoping for Gladstone), and Nolan probably already has an empty mantel spot prepared. They just wouldn’t have won, it’s just nice to be nominated, yadda yadda.

But the Oscars have this *thing* where sometimes it’s not so much you getting an award because *that performance* deserved it, but because YOU deserved it. Leonardo DiCaprio should have gotten an Oscar for “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape” and/or “Wolf of Wall Street,” they gave it to him for “The Revenant,” which isn’t as good as either previous role. Kate Winslet wins for “The Reader,” which if Best Acting By Kate Winslet were an Oscar category wouldn’t even make the list and would probably get beat by “Mare of Easttown,” which isn’t even a goddamn movie.

You’re an Oscar voter this year. It’s the end of February, and you’re looking at your ballot. And you’ve spent the past few weeks hearing about the Oscars fucked up. How Hollywood didn’t get the point of “Barbie.” How the Academy didn’t even nominate BARBIE for the fucking “Barbie” movie. And you might be thinking, “… I mean, we CAN still give them Oscars.”

Greta’s an easy choice. The Barbie script is incredible, and detailed and smart and funny. Greta already has Oscar nominations for writing. Adapting a book is one thing. Adapting sixty years of canon is a high achievement. I think this pretty much locked her screenplay win.

Margot is nominated for best producer. We’re going to spend the next four weeks seeing articles about just how much work Margot put into this movie. When Margot Robbie loves a project, she works her ASS off on it. And the work shows with Barbie. It’s a good goddamn movie, AND it made $1.4 billion dollars. As good as it was, “Oppenheimer” doesn’t make $955 million if “Barbenheimer” isn’t a thing. There’s an argument to be made that Margot deserves the producer nomination AND win MORE than the actress nomination, because as a producer she made TWO movies reach a billion at the box office, *and she had fuck all to do with one of them*.

So, yeah, I think the Academy might have fucked over “Oppenheimer.” Because for the next month, while people are debating what and who to vote for, all that right there? That’s going to be the discourse they’re sitting on right before voting for Best Picture.

#barbie #oscar nominations #this is me playing 3D chess with an awards show I know frighteningly well and yet still want to throw things at

64 notes · View notes

bomberqueen17 · 1 year

Text

new friend

CW SPIDERS press J right now if you do not like spiders, godspeed

So when I was in the yurt I always had spiders in there, it was unavoidable. The first season they were wolf spiders and I managed to make some peace with that but the little fuckers would bruise me when they bit me and it was not great. The second season I was in a shadier spot, less attractive to the wolfies, and I wound up with a lovely barn spider orb weaver type that I named Dolores, who lived in my light fixture and spun beautiful elaborate webs that she would redo every morning in the gray light before sunrise.

The cabin is much more... indoors than the yurt was, so I haven't had a lot of visitors. There was a funnel web spider in the south window for much of last summer, and she tried to join me in the blanket fort as it got cold, but I moved her along and she stayed moved.

But this year there hasn't been much of anybody. Until two nights ago, when I ascended the ladder to my sleeping loft and there, sitting on my beige thrift store sheets, was the most massive arachnid I've ever seen in the wild in this climate.

I caught him in a candleholder and carried him down the stairs (have i shared a photo of my stairs? they're a bit laddery but much easier to use than a ladder and they do not wobble even a little!) and flung him out the door, shivering with horror. I am cautiously sort of okay with spiders, but Not Really.

And then last night I went up the stairs again and there he was, waiting, in almost the same spot-- on my little sheepskin rug, directly next to the bed.

I took a photo this time, which I shall include under a cut so you can see what i'm dealing with. I'm not sure of his species! He's 100% not a wolf, and I don't think he's a funnel web spider; he's also not behaving like one. He's just sitting in wait sprawled out in an open spot, IDK why. No webs anywhere. He looks more like the fishing spiders that live on the docks in Adirondack lakes, but what he'd be doing indoors on a second storey I don't know.

Anyway. I got him into the same candleholder, and carried him down and flung him out the more distant door, but if he's there again tonight I have a jar with a screw lid and I'm going to put him into that and leave him there all night and then take him somewhere farther away in the morning. I cannot have this guy as a pet, he is Too Large and too fond of my bed. The truce I reached with the wolf spiders was "no spiders in the bed" and he doesn't seem willing to abide by that so NOPE.

cut: for really real a lot of spider

Candle lighter for scale but it's not doing the best job. In his resting posture, splayed out, he is most of the size of my palm. NEW THENK YEW.

at liberty, showing leg conformation better but not at all conveying scale:

and a bonus glamor shot of him giving me a furious death-stare as i have him captive:

[image descriptions: three photos of a giant fucking spider, two in a glass candleholder and one sprawled out on a sheepskin rug seductively. Eight legs, two pedipalps, legs pretty evenly distributed and fairly thick, coloration brown with speckles/banding but no bold markings, fairly narrow abdomen; i don't know what species this is at all!]

#spiders #no for real #about the author #tiny house living #HOW IS HE GETTING IN #and why is THAT the spot he wants to be innnn #weeping gnashing etc

23 notes · View notes

hazbinned · 1 day

Text

@stolsas

Angel's entire body ached. Of course it did. When did it not? After yet another ruthless eighteen-hour shift filled to the brim with everything he was thankful not to remember, all that the spider wanted to do was dilute everything even further, under heaps of drugs. Or drinks. Or whatever they had on hand in the nearest club— not like he was too picky at the moment.

Sinners (and the occasional imp and Hellhound) passed him by as he headed down the sidewalk, but he didn't pay attention to any of them. It was one of those nights where he didn't want to think about anything except where he was going, and the short-term relief that would follow. He even ignored the wolf-whistle someone across the street so 'kindly' decided to direct his way.

It was for the best, really. Angel could feel his blood beginning to boil— the next person he actually had to talk to might very well have an outburst on their hands.

At least he was able to get away from the obnoxious stranger without speaking a word. It looked like the club was across the street now, too.

If he could just get there without—

The spider tripped head-on into something furry. Feathery? It was a someone, and it was soft.

He hissed and spluttered, pushing them away like he had just stumbled into a spiderweb.

"You giant piece'a shit! Watch where you're goin'!" Angel spat, stepping around them to continue on his way. "I'm walkin' here!"

As he turned back toward the stranger and got a look at them— a really good look— his blood went cold.

That was no sinner. No imp or Hellhound, either. Not that the creature he'd just yelled at was incredibly intimidating on his own, (quite the opposite, in fact), but... the general aura surrounding him screamed "Hell royalty."

And that Angel Dust had just screwed up big time.

All his day needed, right?

"I'm— Oh, jeez, I'm s—" Angel, think fast. Switch it up. Use your tried and true method! "... Say, I didn't know there were gentleman types 'round here now. You come here often... ?"

A sultry purr slipped through his teeth, and he swayed his hips to and fro-- approaching the 'owl' again, this time on purpose and hoping to whatever higher power that was out there that this would work.

He could not add "get in trouble for cussing out royalty" to his itinerary for the day. It was rough enough already.

#stolas #♠️ : my effeminate fellow / angel dust.#{ This completely slipped my mind yesterday. APOLOGIES 🙏 }#{ Sorry it's long! You don't have to match. }

2 notes · View notes

kalid-raven · 1 year

Text

Raincoats for Ducks (Quotes)

Wolf: Why should I make my bed, when I'm just gunna unmake it to sleep in it anyways? Bell: Why should I feed you if your just gunna die anyways? Wolf: Wolf: I'll go make my bed-

Bell: Don't break someone's heart, they only have one. Wolf: Break one of their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

Bell: You spent all our money on THIS?? Wolf, putting tiny raincoats on ducklings: They live outside. They need this.

Wolf: You’re charged with…..breaking into a pet store? Bell: I thought the animals might be lonely.

Wolf: Sleep is the body’s best safety mechanism. Bell: How so? Wolf: It keeps you from screwing up for 8 hours.

Bell: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response. Wolf: Wow. They sound stupid. Bell: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense. Wolf: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!” Bell: I guess you’re right. Hey Wolf, I love you. Wolf: See! Just say that! Bell: Holy fucking shit. Wolf: If that flies over their head then, sorry Bell, but they're too dumb for you. Bell: Wolf.

Bell: I found a note in one of my old word .docs that said Note to self: Get revenge on Wolf. Bell: Except I couldn't remember what I was supposed to get revenge for. Bell: But I trusted my own judgment, so I went with it. Wolf: Hmm... I don't know what you were supposed to get revenge for, either. Bell: I can only assume you got what was coming to you. Not 100 percent sure, though. Wolf: Well, whatever I did, I guess I deserved it. Bell: Let that possibly be a lesson to you.

Bell, pointing a camera at Wolf: There they are, our sweet baby. Wolf, holding a cigarette and a beer: What-?

Wolf: Every zoo is a petting zoo unless you’re a coward. Bell: I’m worried about you.

Bell, throwing a pokeball at Wolf: Wolf, I choose you! Wolf, not looking up from their book and catching it: You need an Ultra ball to catch this Legendary Pokémon.

Bell: Wolf, no. Wolf: Wolf, yes.

Bell: Hey Wolf, I’ve got an idea for how to solve this. Wolf, pulling out a shotgun: Yeah? Bell: Wh- No! That’s not the idea, Wolf!

Wolf: Life is like Bell. It's short.

Bell: My hands are cold. Wolf: Here, let me hold them. Bell: My lips are cold too. Wolf: *covers Bell's mouth with their hand*

Wolf: I won a new phone in a race. Bell: Huh? What kind of race lets you win a phone, Wolf? Wolf: A race between the store owner, the cop, and me.

Bell: If I run and leap at Wolf, they will most certainly catch me in their arms. Bell, running towards Wolf: Coming in! Wolf: No! I’m holding coffee! Wolf: *Drops coffee and catches Bell*

Wolf: Hey guys, I found a spider. Cool little lad. Thanks for eating the mosquitos. Wolf: Oh no, where did it go? Bell: WOLF WHAT THE FUCK?!

Bell: Sorry it took so long to bail you out of jail. Wolf: No, it was my fault. I shouldn't have used my phone call to prank call the police station.

Bell: I want to be with you for the rest of my life. Wolf: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal. Bell, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

Wolf: How do you want your coffee? Bell: Black, like my soul. Wolf: Wolf: Bell, your soul is a latte.

Bell: Hey, wanna help me commit arson? Wolf: What the hell!? Bell: Oh, sorry, my bad. Bell, whispering: Wanna help me commit arson? Wolf, whispering: Of course. What do you need?

Bell: How many vampires do you think have been hit by a car backing up in a parking lot because the driver couldn’t see their reflection? Wolf: I’ve never considered it but you’re really shining light on what’s probably a very serious issue.

Wolf: Ow! Bell: What’s wrong? Wolf: I have this weird pain right above my eyebrow. Bell: It’s called a stress headache. I got my first one when I was four.

Wolf: Did you buy eggs like I asked? Bell: Even better! Wolf: What the fuck did you- Bell: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.

Wolf: Is five a lot of followers? Bell: Depends on the context. Bell: On Instagram? No, not a lot of followers. Bell: In a dark alley? Yes, a lot of followers.

#quotes #incorrect quotes #Wolf #bell #slasher-verse

10 notes · View notes

skellebonez · 1 year

Text

Let's get to some asks from last night!

Definitely. I actually headcanon that they, and Pigsy, knew each other in college and he was very competative back then as well. Knowing Syntax is the same guy who lived in the dorm across from Pigsy? Oh, that is gonna make him more determined to one up him. Syntax, meanwhile, just likes knowing he is the smartest person in the room.

Oh, I like that headcanon! I love the idea of her wandering the country on her own as a kind of lone wolf too. The idea that Huntsman and Goliath also regret their falling out also interests me.

Hmn... I am assuming you swapped them and him here. Honestly, I don't think they would be at all. They would be confused, yeah, but not upset at MK. The most I can see is they would be upset that the spiders don't trust them as much as MK, but also understand he has also experienced more of what they have so it's more so upset at not having all the info they may need to help them or beat LBD moving forward.

Ok, THAT is a fantastic idea! One of my ideas is simply that they go back to SQ before he is able to find them and follow MK out. Another is, if they are already suspiscious, they have traps set up to distract him and LBD while they run. I wanna give this some more thought!

Mei would be HORRIFIED. Especially for MK, knowing he's gone against her alone two times by that point possibly.

There's gonna be... so much yelling. So much. The snark from Huntsman will be scalding, Pigsy's aim will improve as he tosses cooking utensils in his direction. But after they start to get to know each other and if they can focus their anger on a mutual target?

That target is screwed.

They would just respond with that they trusted their Queen. They had no reason to question her because they believed she knew what she was doing was safe (for them, anyway). Syntax in particular would say he was the lowest on the power structure of the spider so he felt he couldn't question anything without reprecussion (after all, the last time he did he was turned, and while he is happy as a spider now he is fearful of what may happen to him still). Goliath is the kind to genuinely trust someone so while he didn't trust LBD and Mayor, he DID trust his Queen and wanted to focus on supporting her.

Huntsman would say that it took Sandy asking him question he couldn't answer to make him question things. He was much in the same mindset as Goliath before and he doesn't have a good reason for not bringing up his concerns. He (in my headcanon) is SQ's right hand man. He could have... he should have.

It's too late now.

#skelleask #monkie kid #lego monkie kid

3 notes · View notes

tartrazeen · 4 months

Text

Can I just say how funny the writers are for how they made the Sentinels

Like I always wondered why Rohan, the Mystic Knight of Fire, had to fight the Ice Lord of whatshisface. Everyone else got something related to their element, but Rohan got the opposite. And I always thought maybe that had a hidden meaning or something, or that it was going to be elaborated on, or that Rohan had to fight a second one later - something. I really like it.

And at the complete, other end of the scale is Garrett's Sentinel. Which I love for totally opposite reasons.

It's like there were five writers for these guys, and each one had a turn coming up with an idea, and they all got increasingly tired as they went along 🤣

Writer 1: I like the dichotomy of Fire and Ice. I think that's what Rohan should fight: a big, spooky skeleton, maybe as a callback to when he fought the one Cathbad summoned as a child or even in the first episode. It'll really show his progression.

W2: Oh, I can do spooky. I like the idea of a spooky bat. Not - uh... not one that can fly. But it could fly, probably. And it's got this super sweet weapon and screech attack that directly relates to air, so that's cool. And bats have rabies, which is really spooky too.

W3: I'll do a uhhhhhhh fuckin' uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh snake. But it doesn't look like a snake. And it doesn't sound like a snake. Are snakes in the water a lot? I know they can be but are they actually known for - ah screw it, close enough. Btw it has legs. Which, for a snake, is spooky. Give it a whip and we'll call it a day, okay?

W4: why would you do a snake when i was literally gonna - nvm, fml, i'll just call it a wolf. Wolves are still spooky, right? And they live in caves? And they stab people with pointy knives? You know, that thing wolves are totally known for - knives and caves? i was gonna do a snake but this fuckin guy - whatever it's fine whatever

W1: Now, what are we going to do for Garrett?

W5:

I WANT A SPIDER

A BIG

FUCK-OFF

SPIDER

W1: ... Okay. The costuming team might have a hard time with the legs -

W5:

NO COSTUMES

PHOTO-REALISTIC

FUCKN FANGS

BIG SPIDER

W4: ... are we allowed to just put a spider in the show like that?

W5:

I WANT OTHER FUCKN SPIDERS CRAWLIN AROUND ON HIS LEGS

GET THE KIDDIES THINKING LITTLE SPIDER

FUCKIN - SUPRISE

BIG SPIDER

W3: Wait, what weapons is it going to have?

W5:

IT'S A SPIDER

I WANT IT TWICE THE SIZE OF A HUMAN MAN

W3: Does it at least have a catchphrase?

W5:

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEE

W1: Hm. That might be too intense. Tell you what: let's settle on a silent, photo-realistic spider that's twice the size of a human man and has dozens of little spiders crawling up Garrett's legs, and we'll go get some lunch.

W3: Hey, how's Garrett going to get rid of the little spiders that are crawling over him?

W2: It's probably fine for him to brush them off with his bare hands. We'll just cut away and never mention them again. Are we done here?

W5: Wait, make it hiss like a snake. Snakes are spooky.

W1: Sold.

W4: wtf!!!

#mystic knights of tir na nog #my stuff #good job tartra

0 notes

the-firebird69 · 8 months

Text

Watch "Spooky season in July San Diego Comic-Con #ComicCon #cosplay" on YouTube

There's a lot of people in the line trying to see why our son and daughter are putting it there and they read it and say oh I see it cost money and they shut it down they start screwing around with them so we're going after a whole bunch of these idiots cuz they don't want us to have money and it's a boon really we're taking their stuff and taking their money and there's a lot of them they're hiring people and a lot of them are clones summer trumpsters summer bjA most of them are clones, it's about 85 to 90%, and the others are being monitored by clothes so we're going to attack them

-right now there is a group of people attacking the clones very fiercely all over the world and down below and they're going after bases very hard and they're going after the ships they see them starting up they've been going after them all day huge huge groups are going down all the tunnels except the exhaust and it's way too hot and it's massive it is massive okay you trying to send drones down the tunnel all the time and they ignite every time is a huge huge Force going up there now from the Midwest and upper Midwest it's giant it's just really big trillions of people. Is a massive Force and it is going at them very hard and it will soon be there with a lot of hardware and it's going great for the ship in Canada another group is going from California and right by where the max are and they're huge and they're going to ignoring the max and the master told him not to and they ignored him and let them die and to tell him that's a fire or they will and to keep moving and it's a huge one okay it's like 10 miles long and 5 miles wide and there's a few of them going up there that size and they're moving fast heard it rev up a few times and they're going. And it was 1.8% if these don't make it it'll be 1.6% that's a lot of people and there's a gigantic group going from the upper Midwest and Midwest they are huge if they don't make it it'll be 1.5%, and from the East Coast it's another huge group and it'll be 1.4% and there's several more groups for me up all over the world of warlock overseas will become 0.6% if they fail and they're getting smaller and smaller and they called from South America and 0.5% came up so good.

-other news there's a lot of odd bugs here and he thought he had a bed bug but it's not what it is like a weird spider. I haven't seen them before they're in here he's got a spray or things are babies of the Little Wolf that's kind of what they are but it's terrible it's always got something bothering him and I'm mad about it so we're going after people cuz it's so gross here.

-there's other things happening one of them is people can't stand how he is and say he's not getting hit and they're full of s*** it doesn't have for anybody protecting people I'm going after them now

-there are other things happening in space there's a war they're going after the remaining blackships, and hitting and they're getting smaller the hit about 50% of what was there which was really 10 million chips and they are getting very small but those ships are bigger now there's 5 million left and they range from two miles to you know 8,000 then there's the big ones there's only five of them but really the average size is about 3 MI and if they're cut in half again it'll be average size of 5 MI that's a big fleet at that size because of the size ships and it's harder and harder right now theur sending huge fleets. The stone chips are cut down in 20 million but most of them are two to five miles then there's a section of 1 million that are 10 MI and 500,000 that are 20 I mean that's a huge number a big ships they have a lot of big ships too but they don't equal the firepower and it's a heck of a war and they need star Blazer chips and cookie has blasters that work and they're powerful it's about half the power of ghwb but twice the power of the old last rev of tech. And people want the stuff up and he's not doing it he's afraid to lose it all so that's going on and there's also

-a huge War just being waged in Arizona and they're mentioning the rose cross and they mentioned the keys and spurred on a quest for the keys and back over in London they're still thinking they might be there and they're seeking Tom Cruise and who says he doesn't have them it is an ongoing thing.

-this massive massive numbers of people now getting up and going to the ships so we're going to publish

Thor Freya

Each ship can fit and then the tomato ships are for like 2% of the population if if you had to

Zues

True too

Hera

Olympus

0 notes

bearpillowmonster · 1 year

Text

Super Castlevania IV Review

Forgive me if I compare this to Metroid.

Since I revisited Metroid and it becoming one of my favorite franchises, I figured I'd do the same with Castlevania. I think this is another one of those instances where you need to start with the right game, I guess mine just so happened to be Super Castlevania 4. Why so specific? Because I didn't want to go too early with the original 1-3 on NES and this was closer to a remake of the first one.

Now I've tried Castlevania 64 and it seemed different but just not my thing, everything placed felt deliberate. Then I tried Aria of Sorrow and I had no idea what I was doing, I still kind of don't but at least with this game, I don't really have to worry about taking the wrong path. Why? Because this game is split into stages.

I think this is a cool decision because it allows for a variety of different scenarios. Now this is a harder game so enemies can pop up out of nowhere. Imagine a rushing river that's slowly pushing you wherever it wants or maybe a cave where the stalagmite falls on you or a mansion with creaky stairs, a graveyard with hands that grab you so spiders can shoot their babies at you. That's just so cool. In this game, atmosphere is everything and it nails it pretty well. I never really felt like I was doing the same things, I felt like I was progressing to whatever was ahead except I had no idea what was ahead, there was no way to tell because a book could fly off the shelf and attack you for all I know, it challenged what I thought I knew. Normally I wouldn't like that but I found it a lot more digestible with this entry and would snicker at what I ended up finding. Now, I never could've played this on a console because I'd be all screwed up redoing stages with a set amount of lives, losing too much health and whatnot, still a baby on that front.

As far as gameplay, there isn't a separate button to aim diagonally, it's just built into the stick so that threw me off at first but you can control the whip pretty good. There really isn't an upgrade system which isn't necessarily a bad thing either, you can get the metal whip frequently from one of the candles which works a bit better but that's about it, nothing's permanent so it feels like you're actually scavenging for the treasure.

Items aren't carried per say, candles hold most of the items like an axe, a boomerang, a knife, health items and so on but those weapons can only be carried one at a time so be cautious of what you pick up. You can also pick up money which gives you a better score and sort of makes you feel like a treasure hunter in Drac's mansion. Yes, there's a score which is measured by your time, enemy kills and so on but it isn't indicative of an ending, in fact, there's only one with this game specifically.

A few things I didn't like are that you can't jump or crouch on stairs. Something I hated about the original Metroid as well is that the end level is a gauntlet, well same applies here. But I will say that I learned a ton of new tricks just from that level alone, I just wish it would've come sooner (it's not the game's fault, but it didn't exactly make it obvious). But yeah, really solid title, I look forward to branching out to other entries even if this is a little bit of a lone wolf in its category.

#super castlevania #super castlevania iv #super castlevania 4 #castlevania 4 #snes #review #game #video game #super nintendo

1 note · View note

gameguides · 1 year

Text

ZERO Sievert Mission List

Welcome to our ZERO Sievert Mission List guide. Brief Mission List and their item requirements so you don't accidentally sell what you've would've need next mission. We know that there are people who have a hard time finishing the ZERO Sievert game. If you are one of those who find it difficult to finish the game, let's take you to our ZERO Sievert guide. #ZEROSievert

ZERO Sievert Mission List

Brief Mission List and their item requirements so you don't accidentally sell what you've would've need next mission. Missions Notes: A semi-collection of the missions I've been able to to record, so some are missing. Ver 0.26.1 Materials - Conductor (Bunker) - 40 scrap material - 20 screw nuts - 20 nail - 1 screwdriver - 1 drill - 1 propane tank Meat for Igor - Igor (Forest) - 10 Raw meat Grigory’s Ring - Mr. Junk (Makeshift camp) - Collect Grigory’s ring (Swamp) Eyes Everywhere - Reynard Shepard - Place purchased CCTV in library

Barkeep- First steps p.1 - Skill book - Survive forest (Forest) First steps p.2 - Kill 5 bandit in Forest - Kill 5 Wolf in Forest Valuable Item - Retrieve item south village (Forest) Smoking Kills p.1 - 8 Molbaro cigarette - 10 Matches - 3 Lighter - 2 Zippo lighter Smoking Kills p.2 - Skill book - 8 Wilfon cigarette - 1 Golden zippo The Lost Convoy - Find lost convoy (Forest) Supply p.1 - 5 Bread - 5 Water - 1 MRE Vendetta - Kill 20 Bandit Survivalist: Forest p.1 - Survive Forest with 200exp/8000 roubles Survivalist: Forest p.2 - Storage - Survive Forest with 350exp/15000 roubles Supply p.2 - 8 Tushonka - 8 Canned Fish - 3 Pasta No More Barks - Kill 15 wolf (Forest) Chocolate for Everyone - 8 Generic chocolate - 4 Premium chocolate What’s on the Flash Drive? - 2 USB New Arrivals- Police/Standard CP00 armor - Investigate port (Industrial) More ZERO Sievert Mission List Cutlery - 8 Fork - 8 Spoon - 8 Knife What’s Cooking? - 4 Cooking pot - 30 Salt - 30 Pepper The Lost Backpack - Retrieve equipment (Forest, Makeshift camp) Documents p.1 - Find missing Hunter (Makeshift camp) Documents p.2 - Skill book - Retrieve document (Forest) Makeshift camp - Skill book - Survive 3 time, kill 15 bandits (Makeshift camp) The Missing Group p.1 - Find missing group (Swamp) The Missing Group p.2 - Eliminate target (Swamp) Stylish One - Kibba armor - Kill 15 Kibba (Mall) Survivalist: Makeshift Camp p.1 - Survive Forest with 250exp/8000 roubles Survivalist: Makeshift Camp p.2 - Survive Forest with 400exp/16000 roubles

Doctor- Radioactive Meat - 12 raw meat Strange Crystals p.1 - 4 Fire crystal Pelts p.1 - 10 Rabbit Pelts No data - Attachment - Retrieve Analyzer (Forest) Movies - 4 DVD drives - 5 Multi-plug - 5 Power outlets Pelts p.2 - 8 Wolf pelt - 6 Boar pelt Body parts p.1 - 8 Boar fangs - 12 ghouls tentacles Body parts p.2 - Fook0/Police armor - 5 Spider eye - 5 Spider web - 10 Blink claw The Radio Tower - Locate Radio Tower (Makeshift camp) Necessary Components - 10 Wires - 6 Relays - 5 Hard disk Strange Crystals p.2 - Storage Module - 4 Chemical crystal - 6 Fire crystal - 2 Electrical crystal Upgrade - 3 CPU - 1 SSD drive - 1 Military Circuit - 8 Bulbs Fix Radio Tower - Skill Book - Bring Armor repair to Radio Tower (Makeshift camp) Medkit -Storage module - 20 Scrap medicine - 4 Anti bleed gel - 4 Standard medkit - 2 Modern medkit Laboratory p.1 - Retrieve lab key (Industrial zone) Laboratory p.2 - 6 Wires - 4 CPU - 5 Smartphone - 3 Relay - 2 SSD More ZERO Sievert Mission List Laboratory p.3 - Find strange flesh sample (requires purchase lab keys) Radiation Effect- Fook2 armor - Reach orange level of radiation Tons of Meds! - Skill book - 50 scrap medicine -

General Artemovich- Secret Documents- Standard Headlamp - Retrieve documents (Forest) Sawmill p.1 - Find the sawmill The Oldman- Storage Module - Kill Igor Sawmill p.2 - 1 USB from Sawmill (Forest) Equipment p.1 - 250 scrap ammo - 180 scrap weapon Equipment p.2- Skill book - 45 5.45x39mm BT - 20 7.62x54Rmm SNB - 30 9x39mm SP-5 The Lair - Find ghoul lair (Forest) Destroy the Ghoul’s Lair - Destroy lair using purchased dynamite Cleaning p.1 - Kill 10 Hunter Cleaning p.2 - Kill Lazar More Bandits - Kill 25 bandit Mark a Working Truck - Put purchased GPS on working truck Ghoul Destroyer p.1 - Kill 12 Ghoul Ghoul Destroyer p.2 - Kill 40 Ghoul Motel p.1 - Find entrance to motel (Makeshift Camp) Motel p.2 - Skill book - Eliminate infestation at motel (Makeshift Camp) Always in the Way - Kill 6 Hunters (Makeshift Camp) Weird Phenomena p.1 - Recover flight recorder (Swamp) Preparing for Battle - 200 Scrap ammo - 150 Scrap weapon - 8 Bandage - 5 Medkit T-000 - 6 Vodka Clear the Swamp - Clear the Swamp Inspect the Village - Inspect the Village Read the full article

0 notes

achtung-attitude · 1 year

Photo

Blood spurts from Yeon-in’s ruined eye. He whimpers, shaking his head violently, trying to dislodge the shard of glass still embedded in his eyeball.

While he panics, T’onga is already at work. An outdoor mini fridge stands near the sliding door to the house. She raids it, pulling out a small whiskey bottle with a screw cap. A big red welt swells on her left hand, and her right hand is still blistered from dipping into the scalding pool water. Both hands suddenly throb as she unscrews the whiskey, and she hisses in pain and drops the bottle.

“Ugh… You fucking mutt…” she growls, picking the bottle back up. She glares at the welt on her left hand, then tips the bottle upside down, draining the contents. “Getting stung by a dying wasp? Look at what I have to go through because of you…! I’ve been getting the shit kicked out of me for like two weeks! I’ve had enough!”

Behind her, Yeon-in begins to compose himself, giving up on dislodging the glass. In the grass, T’onga grabs an errant spider and tosses it into the empty bottle. Then she stands and waits.

With his right eye gone, Yeon-in’s power is halved. But T’onga is in a rough way herself. Her skin is red raw from the heat, and the wounds from her previous fights scream at her. The steam from the pool dissipates as the water cools to lukewarm.

T’onga and the wolf stare each other down, the latter not daring to let her out of his sight again. “Timing has to be perfect,” she thinks. “Do the same thing as before. Put HOUSE OF PAIN in the glass, strike it so it shatters once HOUSE OF PAIN leaves. Makeshift glass grenade. Maybe I can get his other eye. Or cut right through his body…”

The wolf’s remaining eye glows bright. His breathing is haggard, his tongue lolling out. Neither opponent moves toward each other. T’onga prepares her bottle grenade like a gunfighter waiting to draw, until she notices that Yeon-in isn’t looking at her at all.

Instead, his glowing eye focuses on the remaining water in the swimming pool, roughly 9000 gallons. The red light intensifies, but the water doesn’t boil like before. T’onga senses something bad on its way. “Shit!” she cries, and applies HOUSE OF PAIN to the bottle, repeatedly slamming it against the side of the house before hurling it at Yeon-in.

The bottle is still flying through the air when Yeon-in’s eye burns brighter than ever before, then he barks. From within the pool water, there’s a bright flash, followed by a colossal booming sound. The water swells, erupting into steam. Glass cracks from the shockwave.

T’onga is thrown off her feet, having just barely covered her ears to protect them. When she rises, her ears are ringing and her vision is cloaked in thick steam. The heat makes her sweat even more, stinging her eyes. “The water… He flash-evaporated the water! No good…! In this smoke-screen, his nose and ears have the advantage!”

She reaches into her jacket and produces a pearl-handled switchblade, flicking it open and clutching it, as she squints to see through the thick mist. At first, she senses motion to her right and turns to face it, only for nothing to come. T’onga pants, agitated. Something brushes behind her and she turns, slashing in a frenzy with the knife. All she cuts is air.

Suddenly, Yeon-in bursts out of the steam, leaping at her, high enough to meet her at eye level, his jaw snapping. T’onga dodges backwards and avoids his attack, or so she thinks. The back of her legs strikes something hard, perhaps a chair or table. “A trap,” she realizes as she trips over the obstacle, landing hard on her back.

T’onga raises her right arm to cover her neck and braces herself. The moment she lands, Yeon-in reappears and pounces on her. Without mercy, he bites T’onga’s arm, as she screams in pain. His teeth sink straight through her jacket and pierce the flesh. The strength of his jaws cracks her bones.

“RAAAGHH!!!!” she roars, flicking the knife in her stung left hand so the blade points upside down. She stabs at Yeon-in’s neck, but the wolf moves forward so it pierces his shoulder instead. She twists, trying to make him let her go, he doesn’t.

The animal presses further forward, pushing his full weight against her arm. Her eyes meet his one. It burns.

“Oh, Jesus…” she whispers.

Without thinking, T’onga throws her free left hand over Yeon-in’s eye. But blocking his vision doesn’t stop his power. She feels the heat on her palm, her skin drying up and flaking. The wasp sting, now swelled into a boil, suddenly bursts. “FUUUUUCCCKK YOOOOU!!!” T’onga shrieks out of pain and frustration.

She reaches past his head and grabs the knife embedded in his shoulder. With hysterical strength, she twists the blade again and pulls, carving through his muscular skin in a straight line. This, at last, makes him wince and loosen his jaws.

T’onga curls up and kicks out, shoving the wolf off just enough for her to scurry away. She clutches her bleeding right arm, certain that her bones are broken. At the end of the pool stands a broom closet, where All-Kill keeps the pool nets and such. She stares at it for a moment, then grunts and moves toward it.

She hears the roar of flame and a great heat on her back. Glancing behind, she sees the back of her fur coat is ablaze. Yeon-in is staring at her, seemingly undeterred by his injuries. “AAAAAAAHHH!!!” she screams, pulling the coat off before the fire can reach her hair. In desperation, she fling it behind her to try and shroud the wolf’s field of vision, but he ignores it, letting it drop to the tiles.

T’onga staggers into the supply closet, clutching her bloody arm, as she closes the door behind her. Yeon-in limps towards the door, feeling something approaching contempt. To think he had been intimidated by this human. How could the Boss have ever loved this thing?

Abandoning his pack had been easy. Despite his intelligence and his Stand power making him unmatched on the mountain, his existence of ravenous survival was empty. Even the thrill of the hunt was meaningless. Only when the Boss came, and Yeon-in saw what lay at the top of the mountain, did he begin to feel alive. Hunting the Boss’s enemies, serving his ambitions which his animal mind couldn’t even conceive of, it all meant something.

For a pathetic thing like T’onga to betray the Boss, to try and stand in the way of his ambition, it affected Yeon-in like a putrid scent. Staggering under his own weight, blood turning his coat red, he stands on his hind legs. His forepaw deftly presses down on the door handle. The woman inside breathed frantically. A cornered animal, trying desperately to survive.

#jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #jojo no kimyou na bouken #achtung attitude #t'onga kim #yeon-in #take you to burn #ch69

0 notes

koro-is-caffeinated · 3 years

Text

My Demon!Shane headcanons because I saw somebody else do it lmao

His height is an illusion. He can make himself look as much as a foot to 3 metres taller than any being, but on camera he will always appear 6'4, and no matter how you measure him, he will alter reality so the ruler reads as 6'4.

His skin turns a sickly grey colour when in his true form.

He's not actually all that powerful, but he has powers that make him appear much scarier and bigger than he is.

He's an average-ranking demon, slightly above Annabelle

His true form's height visually is between 7 and 8 feet tall.

Black eyes fo-sho, they don't reflect light.

His ears stick out flat and pointy like elf ears.

His legs are like the legs of a goat, but slimmer and bonier like a wolf's, and covered in short, matted, black fur.

His forearms and chest have some scruffier black fur as well.

His tail is as long as his body and covered in diamond-shaped black scales with a thin strip of fur down the base, tipped with a sharp spear-tip.

His face has some scattered similar black scales.

His tail is prehensile and strong enough to pick up Ryan effortlessly.

His feet are clawed and animal-like.

His fingertips look burnt or charred and fade into sharp, hooked, black claws made of stiff keratin.

The air around him is cold and smells like matches and copper.

His tongue is blue and pointy, like a lizard's without the forked tip.

His wings are like a bird's, feathery with tawny feathers near where they connect to his shoulders, because for a demon he's basically a baby.

He's almost 200 years old.

He feeds off of Ryan's fear, and he says it tastes like pancakes.

The wings have layers of black, brown, and white feathers, and his wingspan in 20 feet.

He has the horns of a giant sable antelope that curve far behind his head and are a light brown, like the colour of toffee.

He sits like a cat sometimes.

If you took an X-ray of him, you'd see a large, mangled raggedy-ann doll (Annabelle) stuffed into his chest cavity, and there is a long scar down his torso where he dissected himself and shoved the demon into his ribs.

Moths and spiders are very attracted to him.

His voice is distorted in his true form, three different pitches layered on top of eachother.

He protects Ryan, while also screwing with him.

When he came out to Ryan as a demon, Ryan tried to shoot him with holy water. It didn't do anything. Ryan came to accept it, eventually.

Ryan scribbles pentagrams sometimes just for the sake of bothering him, since it usually creates a buzzing in his head.

Shane's main power is necromancy, he can raise the dead and have him do his bidding. He once slow-danced with the reanimated skeleton of Lizzie Borden.

He loves to mess with camera equipment and throw in little supernatural occurrences on film. The worst he's ever scared Ryan is when he came up behind him and opened his mouth, to which hundreds of moths came flying out.

He heals very quickly!

Being in his human form is very tiring, one time he accidentally turned into his true form while sleeping and ripped his sleeping bag. Ryan had to edit that entire video himself just so that none of the crew found out about Shane's secret.

Sara is the only other person who knows about his demonhood.

#demon!au #demon!shane #headcanons #Demon!shane headcanons #watcher #watcher entertainment #shane madej #ryan bergara #buzzfeed unsolved #Buzzfeedunsolved headcanons #bfu supernatural #bfu true crime #bfu #bfu au

251 notes · View notes

letsunity · 2 years

Text

The Mandoverse Characters As Animals

Din Djarin - The Aye-Aye

The poor LSD monkey that’s desperate for some peace, quiet and yearns to just hide in the background. They just want to vibe and not be involved, the one-off side character. They are considered bad luck and often deemed a harbinger of death but just wants to chill.

Boba Fett - The Honey Badger

A small little beast of sheer willpower and silly ferocity. They will take on a pack of lions and bully food away from leopards. They can shrug off bullets and have the determination of meth heads. You can stick them with a machete and they’ll keep running at you - make sure that they’re dead or they’ll come back!

Fennec Shand - The Orchid Mantis

The pretty bitch with the sharpest claws. She can look like a flower, waiting for you to get lured by her beauty. Within a second, her blades slice through your body, another number to her ever-growing tally.

Greef Karga - The Platypus

An oddity to the world that’s a moral and scientific grey, neither friend nor exactly a foe. They prove to confuse those around them and those who seek them. The amalgamation of beasts have several little tricks up their sleeves, including a venomous spike on their heels if male.

Cara Dune - Giant Japanese Spider Crab

The embodiment of “fuck that” with a side of “hell no”. This beastie can make others step away with its appearance alone. Would probably be the mount for the Orchid Mantis to war.

Ahsoka Tano - Spiny Bush Viper

A being of sheer beauty rivalled by lethality. Though of the snake order, they are a league of their own. It is best to be respectful of this beast, to leave it be unless you want a pair of white fangs in your chest.

Moff Gideon - The Okapi

An elusive bastard that many thought to have not existed or gone extinct, only to shove their stripy ass in your face. They’re the Skeletor of wild animals, deceiving people into thinking that they’re zebra when they’re actually stumpy giraffes.

Peli Motto - The Maned Wolf

Not a dog in the slightest, nor a fox or a wolf - they’re in a league of their own. Nobody is as unique or eccentric as this beastie. Though they have marijuana smelling piss, it’s quirkiness is a freshness we all need.

Bo-Katan Kyrze - The Asian Snub-Nosed Monkey

If the meme “Pathetic” was an animal, it would be one of these frigid bitches. A poor example for gingers everywhere and insults the monkey lineage. The Aye-Aye deserves a better monkey cousin than these snubs.

Koska Reeves - Bat-Eared Fox

Hears a lot of shit and talks a lot more. Though not scientifically a rival, they’d have a staring contest with the Honey Badger. They look cute but will bite your nards away.

Paz Vizsla - The Marine Iguana

A lizard so high maintenance that you can’t even have them in zoos. If they don’t get exactly what they want, they die out of sheer spite.

Cad Bane - Mantis Shrimp

Not only are they the fastest hit in the west, these devas can’t even be kept in aquariums due to punching their glass tanks. Even if they don’t hit you directly, the water around them boils to a point you just perish. They’re a colourful cowboy that’ll dab on your remains because screw you.

Cobb Vanth - Margay

An elusive and secretive little sweetie that’ll make you fall in love with a stare. With a flick of their tail, you’ll discover that you’re a silver fox and kiss this dear upon their forehead. We’d love for them to have a tiktok dance.

The Armourer - The Tasmanian Devil

Though small, these devils are as fierce as they come. They fear nothing and will screech at whatever comes near. They’re so ferocious that they’ve been known to even eat steel wool.

Black Krrsantan - Komodo Dragon

If nature ever developed a middle finger, it would be this beast. Not only is their mouth filled with bateria, they’re venemous. This fortnite dance of an animal will run you down be you on land or water. Even the dead aren’t safe as they dig up graves for an easy snack. Their own children aren’t safe, often swooped up and hunted by their own parents.

Grogu Djarin - Hippopotamus

Though certainly adorable, especially when a baby, they’re actually the deadliest animals. They have the power to yeet you through a tree with minimal effort and are far faster than you’d think.

21 notes · View notes

bluejayfiredancer · 2 years

Note

"It's hilarious to me how he's a god but also pretty useless" has me screeching xD Do you want to elaborate?

lmao of course! I posted about this before but since I'm too lazy to go dig it up... in short, even though Dustfinger came back with all those cool flashy powers, upon closer inspection he actually achieved very little imo:

he didn't really protect Mo from the Piper, he only pissed him off more and Mo would've been really screwed if it weren't for Violante

ditching his body within 5 seconds when Piper and Orpheus showed up with the Night-Mare wasn't at all helpful for Mo, was it

he didn't help Mo/Resa find the White Book at all, they basically all gave up and were like "welp I guess we'll just die together"

he could've sent a fire wolf or fire spiders or something after Orpheus in the end but he was just like "nah let's forget about him" AND NOW LOOK WHAT HAPPENED (I'm only half-kidding)

maybe it's because he's still a pacifist but Dustfinger never used his fire god powers to kill or even hurt anyone, did he? the most he did was get soot on the Piper?? Mo really has to deal with all the villains himself huh

The only concrete things I'd give Dustfinger credit for was physically getting Mo out from the well dungeon with the fire-rope and wrapping up the final little fight in the end... which is... something? I guess? A for Effort, Dustfinger

#dustfinger #inkdeath #tardis-to-pendragon #replies

29 notes · View notes

r3volutionary-queen · 3 years

Text

Chapter 31 Sneak Peek

In his arms, Darcy was laughing.

She lay back against his chest, her head slotting perfectly under his chin, and she laughed. It was sunlight to his soul, bright and pure and warm and kind and it softened every jagged edge inside of him. Steve pressed a lingering kiss into her hair and tightened his arms around her middle, making her giggle even more—a happy sound that he could have listened to for the rest of his life.

Below, Bucky sprawled across both of their laps, using their thighs as his personal pillows. Darcy’s fingers were carding through his long hair, nails scraping gently across his scalp until the man was all but putty in her hands. His dark head swiveled up, love-drunk eyes openly watching her before crinkling around the edges, squinting like two happy half-moons. That gray gaze then slid upwards and met Steve’s soft look.

It was like staring into a marbled sky moments before the sun broke through.

“Love you,” Bucky mouthed to him and Steve’s heart swelled and swelled and swelled until it threatened to burst.

In this place there were no shadows, no war, no death. In this place Darcy’s skin was not littered in scars and Bucky’s arm was warm and whole.

In this place Steve did not burn.

He would have been content to spend eternity here, if it weren’t for the tug on his shoulder, soft but insistent.

Steve jolted and inhaled on instinct, lungs gasping for air as he surged back into consciousness. It was not a peaceful float to the surface; it was sudden and jarring, like the leg of a once trusted chair snapping beneath him. Pain was the first thing to register, a raw kind of agony, as if someone or something had pried him open and scrambled all of his insides. Blood trickled down his shredded throat and he swallowed with a grimace.

Another tug and a voice, quietly murmuring—urging.

“Wake up.”

Blue eyes fluttered open; everything was a blur. Icy rain stung his skin like a thousand needles, cold mud seeped into his suit, and thunder cracked through the air, so loud and so deep it rolled over his skin and shook the ground beneath him. A second later, the sky splintered in a dazzling flash of light as white-hot electricity threaded the earth to the clouds.

And hovering over him, silhouetted against that bright flash of light, was a strange face. Strange because they were familiar; strange because they were dead.

Or at least they were supposed to be.

And then it struck him—

The stone.

Steve’s heart lurched in his chest. The world spun and tipped itself out before righting once more. He blinked and blinked again in disbelief, in fear, in hope, in a painful, terrified mixture of all three.

“T…” he started with a sandpaper rasp. “T’Challa?”

The Wakandan king’s mouth curved and brown eyes softened in relief. His dark brows rose and he dipped his chin, nodding once. “On your feet, Captain.”

Stunned, Steve could not move.

“Am I dreaming?”

“This is no dream,” T’Challa assured him softly. He lifted his head and spun on his haunches, looking at something Steve could not see. A light filled the king’s eyes, both kind and fierce. He glanced down at Steve where he lay, beaten and broken, and T’Challa’s words pierced right through his weary heart. “Hope has not deceived you.”

The words sank beneath his skin, cutting into the meat of his heart, and Steve’s eyes misted. There were things he wanted to say, to ask, but the words couldn’t make it through his tightened throat. For a long moment, he could not even breathe. It felt surreal, liminal.

Hope has not deceived you.

It was strange, almost, how hope felt more dangerous, more treacherous, than the very war surrounding him. A fight could destroy his body, but hope? Hope, or rather hope lost, could ruin his soul. It had been a long time since he allowed himself to truly hope and so when it bloomed in the center of his chest now, like a warm pool of sunlight cascading down his limbs and filling him to the brim, he shook under its raw power.

“Are there,” Steve swallowed heavily, his voice thick, “Are there others? How many?”

T’Challa watched him closely and the corners of his eyes fanned out in a warm smile. The Wakandan king shifted on the balls of his feet and held out his hand. “Rise and see for yourself.”

Steve opened his mouth to respond when an animalistic roar ripped through the air like a serrated knife. The blond stiffened, recognizing the Hulk’s bellow of rage instantly. His heart pounded painfully in his chest and before he could stop it, that dangerous, treacherous hope inside of him grew wings and took flight.

It rose up the length of his throat and surged out of his mouth in a single, wet, hysterical sob of a laugh. He clapped his hand over his mouth and his eyes screwed shut.

All around him, the rain continued to fall.

Finally, Steve sniffed and wiped his face. With a grunt, he slapped his hand into the king’s waiting palm and it was the strength of the Black Panther, not his own, that pulled him to his feet. Instantly, his back erupted in a blinding pain and he staggered, groaning, shoulders hunching as his muscles trembled and stretched. Steve shook and panted through chapped lips, trying to push past the all-consuming agony. His vision blurred, static around the edges, and then finally, he lifted his gaze to the battlefield—

And froze.

Over the last few months, Steve had grown accustomed to the feeling of shock. He knew what it tasted like, how it jolted through his veins, paralyzing him, but this shock was not one born out of terror or dread.

The shock that rolled through him now was one of awe.

The battle still raged; the rain had sunk the fires back into the earth and a white-gray smoke clouded the blood-soaked ground. Explosions flung mud in the air, coating the chaos of fighting armies in filth until it was near impossible to tell who was who. But beyond all of that, beyond the looming warships and the waves of Chitauri and the wolf-like monsters of Thanos, was something else entirely.

Amid the debris and the bombed-out craters and the piles of bodies littering the ground vast beyond number and recognition was an army—and not just any army.

It was the Avengers.

His team, his friends, his family; the world’s last hope. All of them, every last one he had watched dissolve into ash just months ago.

They were scattered but they fought like creatures that exhaustion, despair, and even death itself could not subdue. And even beyond that, a great host of Wakandan warriors were charging into the fray with what was left of the Asgardians and the Skrulls.

And for the first time since any of this began, they were pushing Thanos’ army back to the tree line; theywere overwhelming their enemy.

Wonder overtook him, and indescribable joy; it was beautiful—stunning, robbing him of all thought and word, and for a moment, Steve wished he could paint this.

The only thing that was missing—

Steve’s stomach dropped.

His mind splintered into a million pieces upon the realization and fear prickled along his skin like the legs of a thousand spiders. Panicked, Steve spun around wildly, searching the chaos for two familiar shapes.

“What is it? What is wrong?”

Snapping his head up, a wild kind of insanity tugged at the edges of his mind as he held T’Challa’s worried gaze. Because if the stone had knocked himout cold, he could only imagine what it had done to Bucky, let alone Darcy. In fact, he knew all too well what that stone did to her every time she touched it and the memories that flooded his mind had him in a blind terror.

“There’s a woman,” Steve gasped out, choking on the words, his eyes still roving over the vast, simmering field. Raindrops slid down his face, dripped from his nose, his jaw, his chin. “Darcy. I need to find her. I have to find her—she was hurt pretty bad and… She’s—and Bucky—”

A blood-curling scream.

Steve whipped around, heart in his throat. Somewhere to his right there was a high-pitched female scream—a wail, really—and Steve had never heard Darcy make a noise like that before, but he knew instantly that it was her.

His heart told him so.

Steve couldn’t see her, couldn’t see much of anything beyond the flurry of war and the blasts from the enemy’s weapons. He paled and his vision spun as a new and torrential kind of fear seared through every vein in his body.

“Go,” T’Challa urged at his side and Steve snapped his head around, panting and trembling all over. The king clasped his shoulder, tilting his head toward him. “Do what you must. We will meet when this is over, my friend.”

Unable to do anything but nod, Steve mustered up the very last of his strength (all he had left) and turned and ran into the heart of the battle. Even as the abyss of terror threatened to pull him under, Steve felt something inside of him shift, something endless and ancient, and suddenly his spine was carved out of steel. He was going to find her, both her and Bucky, and he was going to get them out of this place—even if it broke his back and heart and left nothing but his bones behind.

He was going to find them both and he was going to bring them home.

(GUYS IT IS HAPPENING. WE ARE LIKE 6K IN ON THIS CHAPTER SO PLEASE EXCUSE IF YOU'VE MESSAGED ME TODAY, I'LL ANSWER LATER BECAUSE THE FLOW CANNOT BE INTERRUPTED KAY THANKS)

#darcy lewis #steve rogers #bucky barnes #wintershieldshock #shieldshock #stucky #wintershock #ignition #fic sneak peek #fic snippet #darcy x bucky #darcy x steve #steve x bucky #bucky x darcy x steve #endgame fix it

55 notes · View notes