Read more nonfiction from my small collection that’s grown over the past year ✓ Read 10 nonfiction books out of 52 (roughly 19%)
Revisit some old favorites ✓ Reread 8 of my favorite books
Finally get to the books that I’ve had sitting on my TBR for years ✓ Finally read Dorian Gray, Only Prostitutes Marry in May, The Razor’s Edge, and The Yellow Wallpaper
𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐘 𝐖𝐑𝐀𝐏-𝐔𝐏:
Goal: 50
Overall Count: 52
Average Rating: 3.7
Favorite New Book: Yolk by Mary H.K. Choi, The Razor’s Edge by W. Somerset Maugham, Daisy Jones & The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid
Least Favorite Book: November 9 by Colleen Hoover, Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z. Brite, and It Starts With Us by Colleen Hoover
𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐇𝐋𝐘 𝐖𝐑𝐀𝐏-𝐔𝐏:
𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓾𝓪𝓻𝔂 — 15 books
the kiss quotient by helen hoang ✹ 5.0
bluets by maggie nelson ✹ 3.25
mr salary by sally rooney ✹ 3.75
the cruel prince by holly black ✹ 4.50
the lost sisters by holly black ✹ 3.0
the red scrolls of magic by cassandra clare ✹ 2.0
sharp objects by gillian flynn (reread) ✹ 5.0
dearly by margaret atwood ✹ 3.5
the wicked king by holly black ✹ 5.0
the queen of nothing by holly black ✹ 4.25
how the king of elfhame learned to hate stories by holly black ✹ 3.75
the seven husbands of evelyn hugo by taylor jenkins reid ✹ 5.0
if we were villains by m.l. rio (reread) ✹ 5.0
get a life, chloe brown by talia hibbert ✹ 3.75
daisy jones & the six by taylor jenkins reid ✹ 5.0
favorite book: daisy jones & the six by taylor jenkins reid
least favorite book: the red scrolls of magic by cassandra clare
𝓯𝓮𝓫𝓻𝓾𝓪𝓻𝔂 — 0 books
𝓶𝓪𝓻𝓬𝓱 — 4 books
boy parts by eliza clark ✹ 4.75
november 9 by colleen hoover ✹ 1.0
the picture of dorian gray by oscar wilde ✹ 4.5
gone girl by gillian flynn (reread) ✹ 5.0
favorite book: boy parts by eliza clark
least favorite book: november 9 by colleen hoover
𝓪𝓹𝓻𝓲𝓵 — 4 books
my year of rest and relaxation by ottessa moshfegh ✹ 4.0
pride & prejudice by jane austen (reread) ✹ 5.0
black swans by eve babitz ✹ 3.5
a life cycle: a guide to healing and rediscovering yourself by nicole asherah ✹ 4.0
favorite book: my year of rest and relaxation by ottessa moshfegh
least favorite book: n/a
𝓶𝓪𝔂 — 3 books
yolk by mary h.k. choi ✹ 5.0
normal people by sally rooney (reread) ✹ 5.0
things have gotten worse since we last spoke by eric larocca ✹ 2.5
favorite book: yolk by mary h.k. choi
least favorite book: things have gotten worse since we last spoke by eric larocca
𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓮 — 0 books
𝓳𝓾𝓵𝔂 — 2 books
the yellow wallpaper by charlotte perkins gilman ✹ 3.75
galatea by madeline miller ✹ 4.0
favorite book: galatea by madeline miller
least favorite book: n/a
𝓪𝓾𝓰𝓾𝓼𝓽 — 12 books
trick mirror by jia tolentino ✹ 4.0
malibu rising by taylor jenkins reid ✹ 4.5
bunny by mona awad ✹ 2.75
the risk by s.t. abby ✹ 2.5
sidetracked by s.t. abby ✹ 2.75
scarlet angel by s.t. abby ✹ 2.75
all the lies by s.t. abby ✹ 2.75
paint it all red by s.t. abby ✹ 2.0
the bride test by helen hoang ✹ 2.0
charlotte’s web by e.b. white (reread) ✹ 4.0
the heart principle by helen hoang ✹ 5.0
i’m glad my mom died by jennette mccurdy ✹ 4.5
favorite book: the heart principle by helen hoang
least favorite book: paint it all red by s.t. abby
𝓼𝓮𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 — 2 books
the laugh of medusa by hélène cixous ✹ 4.5
empireland: how imperalism has shaped modern britain by sathnam sanghera ✹ 3.0
favorite book: the laugh of medusa by hélène cixous
least favorite book: n/a
𝓸𝓬𝓽𝓸𝓫𝓮𝓻 — 2 books
the goldfinch by donna tartt (reread) ✹ 5.0
it starts with us by colleen hoover ✹ 1.0
favorite book: n/a
least favorite book: it starts with us by colleen hoover
𝓷𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 — 5 books
female chauvinist pigs: women and the rise of raunch culture by ariel levy ✹ 3.0
only prostitutes marry in may by dacia maraini ✹ 4.0
snapshots of a daughter-in-law: poems, 1954–1962 by adrienne rich ✹ 2.0
exquisite corpse by poppy z. brite ✹ 1.0
devotion by patti smith ✹ 3.75
favorite book: only prostitutes marry in may by dacia maraini
least favorite book: exquisite corpse by poppy z. brite
𝓭𝓮𝓬𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 — 3 books
trainwreck: the women we love to hate, mock, and fear...and why by sady doyle ✹ 4.5
the secret history by donna tartt (reread) ✹ 5.0
the razor’s edge by w. somerset maugham ✹ 5.0
favorite book: the razor’s edge by w. somerset maugham
least favorite book:
sangyeon really doesn’t strike me as a person who would have a lot of nicknames for his s/o, but when he does,, wHeW boY does he use it a lot. he probably uses “babe” more than your actual name. the nickname is more on the basic side, but he still loves using it and finds it very endearing.
jacob
“angel”
hhhhhh, where do i even start? this boy is literally the purest. he calls you angel way more than your actual name. he loves this nickname so much because it fits your relationship perfectly. whenever he looks at you all he can think about is how pure and beautiful you are. no matter how you look or what you’re wearing, he still looks at you as if you’re the most gorgeous person he’s ever laid his eyes on.
younghoon
“sweet pea”
this cutie!! the love you two have is like straight from a kdrama. he’s so in love with you it’s not even funny! he loves calling you “sweet pea” because it sounds cute and cliché and he loves the sweet smile you give him whenever he does. he uses that nickname quite often but he doesn’t really use it in front of the members cuz he knows they’ll make fun of him sjkfrkd
hyunjae
“prince(ss)”
ugh,, where do i even begin? this boy is so in love with you. he adores everything you do. he loves that you’re his. his princess. he loves how happy you make him feel 24/7. whenever you’re not giving him enough attention, he’ll whine and cling to you but when he calls you “princess”, you’re all his.
juyeon
“doll”
ok so. tbh, you take one look at this boy and all valid thoughts are out the window. but eSpeCiALlY when he calls you “doll.” the affect this name has on you is unbelievable. and he knows it. he uses this nickname when he wants your attention or needs a favour from you. “hey doll, can you please make some tea?” you’re at his service whenever he uses it.
kevin
“my star”
ITS YOUR MOONLIGHT BOY KEVIN!! no but seriously he honestly uses this name a lot with you because he’s your moon boy. he even called you “my star” or “star girl” when you were just friends because of how much he loved it. he loves the idea of your nicknames for each other being connected and he would even want to introduce you as “his star” but he knows he can’t sjhjsd
chanhee
“jelly bean”
this nickname also came from the time where you and the boys were playing bean boozled. and as you were putting the jelly bean in your mouth you immediately gagged and spit it out. what you thought was coconut flavor was actually spoiled milk. as soon as you spit it out chanhee busted out laughing and he’s called you “jellybean” ever since.
changmin
“sunshine”
you’re his ray of sunshine. periodt. whenever he’s feeling stressed or tired he knows he can always count on you do be there for him to cheer him up. even if you’re not good with comforting words; when he sees your smile, all his all his worries seem to shrink. you often catch him staring at you with the biggest smile on his face when you talk about something you’re passionate about because of the way your whole face beams.
haknyeon
“butterfly”
this nickname is in reference to a date when he took you to a botanical garden and a butterfly landed right on your nose. you let out a little shriek but you didn’t want to scare it so you stood completely still. he quickly whipped out his phone to snap a pic before you scrunched your nose and it flew away. he has that pic as his wallpaper on his phone and constantly calls you “butterfly” reminding him of the moment he fell in love with you.
sunwoo
“precious”
this boy absolutely adores you. and that’s that. he constantly asking himself why he deserves you. he adores you so much and sometimes he doesn’t even think you’re real. even when he’s writing his songs and needs his space, he always knows that you’re a phone call away. you’re always catching him staring at you whether its from across the room or right it his arms. you’re the love of his life.
eric
“peaches”
WHEW,, THIS BOY. he’s absolutely obsessed with calling you “peaches”. your contact in his phone is “my 🍑”. he got the name from how squishy your cheeks are and how every time you get shy from something he says, you smile and your cheeks puff out and turn a light pink. this is also lowkey a reference to your ass but we’ll pretend i didn’t say that.
Don't swear at us if you don't like the result, it's not always easy, we can do something different for you if you want
Your limit of requests during the period before they are closed is three, but please put it all in one question
We make:
🌈 Moodboards / Aesthetics (You can also choose: Colored or Transparent background)
🌈 Image Boards (Yes, pls if u mean this Moodboard then you need call it that)
🌈 Icons/Reply Icons
🌈 GIF icons
🌈 Stimboards
🌈 Wallpapers / Board Wallpapers
🌈 Headers
🌈 Instagram Boards
🌈 Layouts
🌈 Glitters
🌈 Stamps
🌈 Blinkies
🌈 Graphics
🌈 Userboxes
What we do:
✅ We make things with characters. We can also make a not characters things, for example, just some things by color or category. You can also suggest a style and color for things (for example: can I ask to make a moodboard (character) in orange, pink and black colors; can you make the character's aesthetic sad/fun?). We also do something based on your headcannons
✅ We can make several or two characters in the same things (with any themes)
✅ We make ship things
✅ We make AU things
✅ You can also choose the icon shape
✅ We make pride things
✅ We make Wallpapers for all devices
✅ Crossovers things
✅ OC's things
Blacklist:
(Feel free to tell us about something problematic)
Characters:
Suguru Kamoshida (Persona)
Haiji Towa; Monaca Towa (Danganronpa)
Marty Armstrong (Lisa RPG)
Professor Pyg; Victor Zsasz; Arthur Fleck (DC)
Hisoka Morow; Illumi Zoldyck (Hunter x Hunter)
Jack (Underworld Office)
Jared (Doll Eye)
Belle; Beast; Gaston (Beauty and The Beast)
Nanami Kiryuu (Revolutionary Girl Utena)
William Afton; Michael Afton; Nightmare Freddy; Nightmare Chica; Nightmare Foxy; Nightmare Bonnie; Nightmare Fredbear; Plushtrap; Nightmare; Nightmare Balloon Boy; Nightmare Mangle (Five Night's at Freddy's)
Ariel; King Triton; Prince Eric (The Little Mermaid)
Prince Florian (Snow White and the Seven Dwarves)
Tate Langdon (American Horror Story)
Archie Andrews (Riverdale)
Marty McFly (Back to the Future)
Margaret Robinson; Hobo; Jealousy; Kenneth; Lucy Simian; Mr. Yoshida; Alison Sandra Gator (The Amazing World of Gumball)
Mr. Labrador (Peppa Pig)
Felix Kranken (The Walten Files)
Lynera Skalbi (Hiveswap)
Daki (Kimetsu no Yaiba)
Selever; Garcello; Sky; Tabi (Non-canon! Friday Night Funkin)
Real People's / YouTuber's etc. (Characters from Movies/Series it's okay)
Sources:
Simpsons
Creepypasta
American Dad
Killing Stalking
South Park
The Office
Vivziepop Media's
Bojack Horseman
Porkchop and Flatscreen
Family Guy
Country Humans / Country Balls
A large Number of Horrors (Ask if we are Comfortable with Someone, before requesting)
SCP's
Attack on Titan
Wizard of Oz (1939 film, all others WOZ sources is ok!)
Something that contains Minecraft materials (like Aphmau, Dream SMP, Minecraft Story Mode, etc., Only canon Minecraft game and Minecraft Earth)
Saya no Uta
Films about Real Wars
Fanganronpa's (It's not include YTTD)
GTA
Future Dairy
Hetalia
"Yaoi/Yuri" mangas
Obey Me
Happy Tree Friends
Yarichin Club
Camp Camp
Boyfriend to Death
The Magnus Archives
Magical Emi, the Magic Star
Senran Kagura
Magical Angel Creamy Mami
Persia the Magic Fairy
Elfen Lied
LapFox Trax
Crush Crush
Alien 9
Eddsworld
The Midnight Gospel
Love Letter
The Arcana
Nekopara
Citrus
Yandere Simulator
Crimson Gray
Ships:
(All here okay if it's platonic or other)
King Dedede x Anyone (Kirby)
Poison Ivy x Males; Harley Quinn x Joker or Batman; Streaky x Anyone; Someone from Red Lanterns corps x Anyone; B'Dg x Anyone (DC)
Junko Enoshima x Anyone; Tenko Chabashira x Males; Byakuya Togami x Toko Fukawa; Hifumi Yamada x Anyone; Teruteru Hanamura x Anyone; Ultimate Imposter x Anyone; Someone from "Warrior's of Hope" x Anyone; Toko Fukawa x Komaru Naegi; Hiyoko Saionji x Anyone (Danganronpa)
Jasper x Lapis Lazuli; Steven Universe x Spinel; Emerald x Someone from "Off Colors" team; Yellow Diamond x someone who's not Blue Diamond; Blue Diamond x someone who's not Yellow Diamond; Fluorite x Anyone; Fusions x Fusions with same characters (Steven Universe)
Courage x Anyone; Eustace Bagge x Anyone; Muriel Bagge x Anyone (Courage the Cowardly Dog)
Tails the Fox x Rouge the Bat or Wave the Swallow; Dr. Eggman x Anyone; Scourge the Hedgehog x Anyone; Metal Sonic x Anyone who's not Robot (Sonic the Hedgehog)
SpongeBob x Anyone Who's not Patrick (SpongeBob SquarePants)
Lemon Demon x Anyone; Ships with Skid and Pump; The Mom x Anyone who's not The Dad; The Dad x Anyone who's not The Mom; Boyfriend x Anyone who's not Pico or Girlfriend (Friday Night Funkin)
Bakugo Katsuki x Izuku Midoriya, Ochako, Camie; Eijirou Kirishima x Females (Boku no Hero Academia)
Boss x River or Eugene (Underworld Office)
Yoshi x Anyone; Bowser x Anyone; Donkey Kong x Anyone (Super Mario)
Bill Cipher x Anyone; Dipper x Wendy; Mabel x Pacifica or Wendy; Stan x Anyone; Ford x Anyone (Gravity Falls)
Zim x Dib or Tak or GiR; GiR x Anyone; Dib x Zim or Tak; Tak x Zim; MiMi x Anyone; 2k x Palindrome; Zib x Anyone (Invader Zim)
Inosuke x Zenitsu; Zenitsu x Nezuko (Kimetsu no Yaiba)
Gregg x Anyone who's not Angus; Angus x Anyone who's not Gregg (Night in the Woods)
Kaoru Kurita x Anyone who's not Momoe Sawaki (Wonder Egg Priority)
Kristoph Gavin x Anyone; Alita Tiala x Anyone; Miles Edgeworth x Females (Ace Attorney)
Oscar x Lola (Shark Tale)
White Choco Cookie x Males (Cookie Run)
Jamie Russo x Anyone (The Amazing World of Gumball)
Alberto x Giulia (Luca)
Any ships from FNaF
Any ships from Bunnicula
Canon Lesbians x Males; Canon Gays x Females
Ships with Childs
Crossover Ships
Pedo/Incest/Zoophilia/Abuse/Selfcest ships (themes related to good self-esteem, just self-love like "how beautiful I am" - thats okay)
Aesthetics:
Stonercore (And all others with Dr*gs, Alco, Cig**ettes, but if Character have Cig**ettes on all images it's okay and we will tag it like: "tw: cig**ettes")
Gorecore
Traumacore
Goblincore
Apocalypsecore
Other:
Flags of Real Countries, Islands, States etc.
Real Spiders and Scorpions
Abuse family, friendship, love (rivalry and enmity it's okay)
Sexualities who's never will be valid (like TikToksexual; Petsexual; G*resexual; etc.)
Old/Pink Lesbian Flag; Sunset Lesbian Flag with 7 Stripes
DD/LG; Fetishism; 18+; S*x; etc.
Misgendering Characters
Erasing canon Characters Orientations
List of Shapes for Icons:
Circle
Square
Heart
Rhombus
Star
Octagon
Polaroid
DNI:
Racist/Believe what "blackwashing" and "reverse racism" is reality
LGBTQ+ phobic
Anti-MOGAI
TERF/SWERF
Exclusionist
MAP/NOMAP
Transmed/Transcum
Sexist/Anti-feminist
Gender critical
Ableist
Antisemitist/Xenophobic
Nazi
If you support r/pe and ab/se
NSFW/DDLG/18+ blog (It's okay if you have some NSFW/DDLG/18+ posts, but it's not okay if all your posts it's NSFW/DDLG/18+)
Support "Super Straight's", "Super Gay's", "Super Lesbian's", "Super Bi's" (or if you)
Summary: Saying no leads Charlotte to a friendship she has never imagined.
A/N: I’m trying to force myself to write. Maybe this will light a fire under my ass.... Or my muse’s. She’s a bit flakey.
Chapter 1
Charlie stood in line with her boyfriend Sam as they waited for their photo-op with Chris Evans. They were second to last in line for the last day of the Comic Con they were at. From the excited giggles of the people in front of them, Chris was posing and having some fun.
Sam was clearly excited. He was Marvel obsessed and had spent more money than any sane person should to get photo-ops with every Marvel cast member. Charlie was just along for the ride. It had been a point of contention with Sam that she refused to dress up with him this weekend. She wasn’t a big movie or TV lover outside of old school Disney stuff and she didn’t get into all the hype of celebrity gossip. She was a book lover and you could usually find her curled up with a book in some corner.
She looked over at Sam, dressed as the Winter Solider and bouncing on the balls of his feet. They had been dating a little over six months and this was the first time she had joined him at one of these things. She wasn’t a fan of crowds and it had been absolute hell for her. The whole weekend she had been regretting saying yes.
“Ok, you guys are next.” The attendant said, leading them into the makeshift photo studio. She was grinning from ear to ear like a creepy Cheshire cat.
Sam rushed in first and started gushing at Chris about how excited he was and how much he loved him as Captain America. Charlie patiently waited for him to finish and then shook Chris’ hand when he extended it to her. “It’s nice to meet you.” She said politely.
“I really like your shirt.” Chris said.
She looked down at her blue Little Mermaid T-shirt she was wearing with skinny jeans and black Converse sneakers. “Thanks. It’s one of my favorites.”
“Mine too!”
“So, what are we doing today?” The photographer asked.
“How about this?” Sam asked. Charlie and Chris both turned to look and Sam was down on one knee with a ring held up at Charlie.
“What the actual fuck?” Charlie gasped.
“Charlotte Grace Mackenzie, will you please marry me?”
“Are you crazy? No!”
“Charlie….”
“Get up!”
“I love you.”
“Oh my god!” Charlie turned and stormed out of the photobooth, leaving Chris and Sam to stare after her.
Charlie sat in the hallway of her hotel next to the door of her hotel room a little while later staring straight ahead at the horrible wallpaper in front of her. She couldn’t believe what had just happened. Sam had rushed after her and the two of them had fought about what he had done. He had then left her standing there. When she had finally calmed down, she had gone after him only to find that he had actually taken the car and left her there.
Luckily, they were only three miles from their hotel and she had no problem walking that. She had busted out her cell phone and turned on her GPS to make her way back. When she had gotten there, Sam had left her a note on the door. She looked at the note again, completely flabbergasted that he was such an asshole.
Find your own way home.
They had travelled from Omaha, Nebraska to Chicago, Illinois for this Comic Con in his car. She was desperately trying to hold herself together and not panic, but she could feel it working hard to burst down her carefully placed walls. It was why she had curled up in a tight little ball on the floor and hadn’t gone down to see if she could get a key made for her so she could get into the room. If she spoke to anyone, she was sure she would start bawling her eyes out.
“Is everything ok?” A voice said to her left. She looked up to see Chris Evans standing there and he clearly recognized her. “Oh! Hey!”
“Fuck me.” Charlie sighed as the tears started to leak out. This was so not what she needed. She had completely forgotten that Sam had chosen this hotel because it was where some of the celebrities were supposedly staying. Fuck him for being correct.
Chris shifted his weight and glanced around. “Are you ok?”
“Nope.”
“Are you lost?”
“Nope.”
“Can I offer you any help?”
Charlie closed her eyes tightly. “How about a rewind on the last couple of hours of my life?”
Chris chuckled. “Sorry. That’s a little out of my wheelhouse.”
“Mine too.”
“Seriously, are you ok?”
“Not in the slightest.” Chris sat down next to her on the floor. “He fucking left me here. I have absolutely no way of getting home now.” Charlie wiped angrily at her wet cheeks.
“Where’s home?”
“Omaha, Nebraska.”
“Shit, that’s a bit of a hike.”
“Little bit.” Charlie shoved her messy, curly, dark copper hair back from her face as the dam cracked further. “Fuck! What the fuck am I going to do now? I can’t even get into the hotel room because that asshat had the key!”
“Come on.” Chris stood back up and held his hand out to her.
“What?”
“You can use my room to breakdown in and then we can call down to the front desk about that key.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I know I don’t, but I am. Come on.” Chris reached down again and grabbed her hand this time. She allowed him to lift her to her feet and then lead her down the hallway. He opened the door to his suite and Charlie promptly started sobbing.
“I’m sorry.” She wiped at her tears aggressively again with shaking hands as Chris ushered her to the couch and sat down. “This is so embarrassing.”
“Please don’t be embarrassed. Your boyfriend should be the embarrassed one.”
“Ex-boyfriend!” She dropped her face in her hands and shook her head. “I’m not even sure what it is I’m crying about. That fuckwad sure doesn’t deserve my tears.” Chris walked over to the minibar and grabbed two beers. He popped the tops on them and offered her one. “Thank you.”
“Gotta say, I’ve seen a few proposals at those things, but never a reaction like that.”
Charlie looked over and Chris was grinning hopefully at her. It actually made her laugh. “What is my life right now?”
“What do you mean?”
“My entire quiet little world has been on the precipice of exploding, I just got abandoned in an unfamiliar city by the guy I was seeing, and I’m sitting here being comforted by a celebrity who doesn’t even know my name.”
“Right now, I’m not a celebrity. Right now, I’m a good Samaritan who stumbled across a person in need. It would make my mom proud. Well, except that I haven’t properly introduced myself.” Charlie snorted as he held his hand out to her. “I’m Chris.”
“Clearly.”
“And you are….” He wiggled his hand at her and she relented, shaking it.
“Charlotte. Everyone calls me Charlie, though.”
“Pretty. So, Charlie, your life is about to explode? How so?”
“You’re really asking? Like, you really wanna know?”
“I really wanna know.”
She started picking at the label on her beer bottle. “I’m leaving everything I’ve ever known behind and moving to the East Coast in a month. I think that’s why Sam pulled that shit today. He doesn’t want me to leave.”
“Where are you moving to?”
“Boston.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. I accepted a job at Little Brown up there.”
“What’s that?”
“A publishing company. It’s been my dream to become a book editor and I’ve been working towards that goal for the last four years. I finally found a company that’s willing to give me a shot at it, but it’s in Boston.”
“That’s pretty awesome.”
“I didn’t even want to come to this thing with him, but I figured I would give him one last good weekend before I broke up with him.”
“You weren’t even going to attempt a long-distance thing?”
“When do those ever work out?”
“I don’t know. I’m a hopeless romantic, though.”
“I’m not.” Charlie set her beer down. “I need to get into my room. See if he left my things or destroyed them. Knowing my luck, he’s set everything on fire.”
“I don’t think he did that. The fire alarms haven’t gone off.”
“Good point.” She pointed at the phone on the desk. “May I?”
“Of course.”
Charlie walked over and picked up the phone, dialing the front desk. “Hi, my name is Charlotte Mackenzie. I got locked out and I need a key to get in.”
“I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t see you registered in our system.”
“No. My boyfriend…. Ex-boyfriend made the reservation. It’s under his name. Sam Cooke. Room 828.”
“Mr. Cooke checked out.”
“What?”
“Mr. Cooke checked out a little while ago.”
“But my things are in that room.”
“I’m so sorry about that. Mr. Cooke didn’t mention that there was anything left in the room. We can send a maintenance man up to let you in to get your things.”
“I kind of need a place to stay tonight.”
“We’re completely booked up, but you’re more than welcome to rent that room for yourself.”
“Ok. Yeah. I can do that, I guess. How much is it?”
“For tonight, the room would be $238 plus tax.”
Charlie choked on air and started hacking. Chris came over and patted her on the back, taking the phone from her. “Hi, this is Eric Prince in suite…. Yeah. Look, can you just put that room on my bill? I’m certain. I would appreciate that. Thank you.” He hung up and offered Charlie a bottle of water.
Once her breathing was back to normal, she shot a confused look at Chris. “Eric Prince?”
He shrugged sheepishly. “Prince Eric…. From The Little Mermaid.”
“Oh.” Charlie blinked for a minute. “Did you just pay for my hotel room?”
“I did, yeah. Was that not ok?”
“I mean…. It’s your money, you can do whatever with it, but you don’t even know me.”
“I’m not someone who can just sit here and listen to someone in distress. If I can help, I’m going to help.” There was a knock on the door and Chris went over to answer it. Charlie stayed seated on the couch, sipping at her water. When he came back, he presented her with a key card. “Your room key.”
“Oh. Thank you.” Charlie took it. “I can’t thank you enough for this.”
“It’s no problem. Let me know if you need any more help or someone to hang out with.”
Charlie laughed. “Yeah, like Mr. Big-Shot Needs-A-Fake-Moniker has no one better to hang out with.”
He frowned slightly. “Actually, I don’t have anyone to hang out with. I ditched my team for a quiet night in. Being around all those people all day long…. I need a recharge.”
She nodded. “I understand that. I’m more of an introvert with some extroverted tendencies. When I’ve reached my limit on people, I just need to stay in and hide. Especially if there’s a crowd.”
“Same.” He shifted from one foot to the other. “Would you like to hang out with me, Charlie? We can recharge our batteries, maybe order a pizza, rent a movie….”
“If you’re sure, then ok. I just want to run and make sure he didn’t destroy my stuff.”
“That makes sense.” Chris followed her down the hallway to her room. When she opened the door, she let out an angry groan while he let out a shocked whistle. Her suitcase had been hurled across the room and it’s contents were scattered everywhere. In the bathroom, he had squirted out all of her toothpaste, broken her toothbrush in half, destroyed most of her makeup, ripped the rows of bristles out of her hairbrush, and dumped her expensive curly hair products down the drain.
“No, no, no, no!” Charlie ran over to the suitcase and lifted it up. Her laptop made sounds like little metal pieces were moving around inside. “Fuck!”
“Shit! He actually broke your laptop?”
“What the hell is wrong with that guy?” Charlie started crying again as she held her broken laptop.
“A broken heart is one thing, but this….”
“He can’t have a broken heart. We weren’t together that long!”
“Wait, how long were you two together?”
“Six months. Today was the first time he even said he loved me.”
“Had you said it to him?”
“No!” She looked over at him. “What are you doing?” Chris had started to move around the room and picking her clothes up off the floor.
“Helping.” He started to fold the shirt in his hands.
“You really don’t need to do that.”
“I know I don’t. You really don’t need to be so difficult.”
She sighed. “I’m sorry. This is just a really fucked up situation and I’m not even sure which emotion it is I’m feeling. And I really don’t mean to take it out on you. Thank you for helping me. It’s very kind of you.”
“You’re welcome.”
They worked together to collect her belongings and pile them on the bed. Once they finished, the two of them tackled the bathroom. Chris took pictures of everything and sent them to his assistant with instructions to purchase them and bring them to his room. Charlie stopped when she got to a beautifully ornate compact mirror. It was antique silver with filigree designs carved into it and little jewels set to resemble a starry night sky. A few of the jewels were missing and the glass inside had been broken. She clutched the compact and started to sob.
“Hey….” Chris gently pulled her into a hug.
“This was my mom’s. My dad gave it to her as a wedding present when they got married.”
“It’s beautiful.”
“They died when I was eleven.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I can’t believe he broke this. He knew it was one of the few things of hers I have left.”
After Charlie had cried herself out, Chris helped her finish cleaning the bathroom and they went back to his room. She curled up on the couch and he sat down on the opposite end. They were quiet for a long moment before he finally broke the silence. “I don’t normally do this.”
“What?”
“Invite strange women to hang out with me.”
“I never said you did.”
“I know, but…. I don’t want you to think that I’m trying to get in your pants or anything.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why don’t you want me to think that?”
“I don’t want you to get the wrong impression of me.”
“What do you think my impression of you is?”
“I’m not sure. You’re not like most women I’ve met.”
“How so?”
“Well for starters, you ask a lot of questions.” Charlie chuckled. “You’re also like this open book that I can’t read.”
“That’s the most interesting thing anyone has ever said about me. What does that mean?”
“I…. Ok, so you drop these seemingly big clues about your life. You were incredibly vulnerable when you told me that your parents died and you’ve cried in front of me while I get the feeling that you don’t do that in front of people very often if you can help it, but none of those clues lead me any closer to being able to figure you out.”
“Do you want to figure me out?”
“I kind of do.”
“Why?”
Chris smirked. “I like to read.”
Charlie and Chris sat on the couch with a half-empty pizza box between them. A pay-per-view movie was playing on the TV, but they weren’t paying attention to it. The two of them had been talking for hours. He found it a welcome relief that she didn’t care about him being a celebrity and that she didn’t know anything about him. It felt great to actually get to know someone.
“I’m really impressed.” Chris said as he looked at the pictures on her phone. “You made out like a bandit on this.”
“I just hope there aren’t any crazy issues I’ll have to fix.” Charlie was showing him the house she had bought sight-unseen at an auction. It was a two story Colonial house in Concord.
“You realize we’re practically neighbors?”
“Are we?”
“Yeah. I just bought a house about two miles away from here.”
“That’s weird.”
“Are you sure you’re not stalking me?”
She laughed. “Trust me, I don’t give two shits about your celebrity status. Unless you wrote a book. Then watch out.”
Chris handed her back her phone. “The commute to Boston might be crazy.”
Charlie shrugged. “I don’t mind. There’s a train station and all the research I’ve done says it’s about an hour commute.”
“It is. You’re going to love Concord.”
“Where did you say you grew up again?”
“Sudbury.”
“Gotcha.”
“So, Mac, what made you want to uproot your life like this?”
Charlie laughed at the nickname he’d chosen. She usually hated it when people tried to call her that, but for some reason Chris made it sound endearing. “You really want to open that can of worms?”
“I really do.”
“Ok.” She took a deep breath. “So, you know mom and dad died in a car accident when I was eleven. What you don’t know is that my twin sister was in the car with them.”
“Oh shit!”
“Yeah. I went from having a full family to being alone.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“My aunt took me in and raised me. Aunt Millie…. She was living with her second husband in Omaha when she got the call that her brother and sister-in-law had died. She flew out to Maine and stayed with me. My parents had just written their wills and hadn’t gotten a chance to tell her that they’d named her guardian of their kids.”
“I bet that was a big shock.”
“For everyone. My mom’s parents thought that they should get custody of me, but aunt Millie wanted to honor my parents’ wishes. She ended up fighting them in court and the judge ruled in her favor. When the school year ended, we moved to her house in Omaha. About a year later, she found out her husband was cheating on her and plotting to take my inheritance.”
“Holy shit.”
“Yeah. It was a pretty significant amount. My mom’s family was pretty well off. She had a trust fund which became mine when she died and my parents had really good life insurance. My grandparents added the money to that trust fund that they intended to put into mine and Max’s trust funds…. Max was my twin. Her name was Maxine.”
“I couldn’t even imagine losing all of that.”
“How many siblings do you have?”
“Three. One older sister, Carly; my younger brother, Scott; and my youngest sister, Shanna.”
“That’s a lot of siblings.”
“Yeah.” Chris took a sip of his beer. “So, back to you. I didn’t need to pay for your room, did I?” Chris smirked at her to let her know he was joking.
“You really didn’t. I just…. I don’t really like to touch that money. After what happened with aunt Millie’s second husband and then her third and fourth husbands…. I figured money ruined people’s lives.”
“What happened with her husbands?”
“They basically used her to try to get to that money. After what happened with her second husband, my grandparents made it very hard for her to touch my inheritance. I didn’t even have access to it until I graduated college. By then, I had learned the value of a dollar by watching aunt Millie work her ass off to keep me clothed, fed, a roof over my head, and in good schools. I had part time jobs throughout high school and college to help her. I used scholarships and grants and a couple of student loans to pay for my college education. I’ve only used that money for three things.”
“What were they?”
“To take aunt Millie to Europe before she died and to pay for that house in Boston.”
“Your aunt is dead?”
“She died about two years ago. Pancreatic cancer. That’s the third thing I used that money on. I paid for all of her medical bills.”
“I’m so sorry, Mac. That’s a lot to go through in only thirty-three years of life.”
Charlie shrugged. “It is, but what can I do about it?”
“When was the last time you’ve been to the East Coast?”
“I visited my grandma in Maine last year when she died.”
“Did you have a good relationship with your grandparents?”
“It was ok. They loved me in their own way. Mom was an only child and I was their only grandkid. They sent me money for my birthday and Christmas. I got Easter baskets from them, too, and I would go out for a week in the summer when I was younger because the court’s said I had to. Those weeks…. Makes me glad that I ended up with aunt Millie. My grandparents weren’t home very much. I hung out with their butler in the summers. When I turned 18, I stopped going. I let aunt Millie have the birthday and Christmas money after that.”
“Wow. You should write a book.”
“Why?”
“Because your life has been…. Eventful and I would even call it inspiring.”
“Maybe one day I will. For now, I prefer to give other people chances to get their voices heard.”
“Is that what appeals to you about being a book editor?”
“Yes. I’ve read some amazing books in my life and I used to wonder what it would be like to be the editor that gets the copy across their desk. To be the first person to read it outside of the author and their family and know that what I have is going to make a lot of other people happy. Not to mention the author. Plus, I’ve been known to be a stickler for grammar, so why not put that skill to use.”
Chris chuckled. “You haven’t corrected my grammar once.”
“You’re pretty eloquent, Evans, but I’ve been silently correcting you.”
That made him tip his head back and laugh loudly, his right hand slapping against his chest. It sucked Charlie in and they both laughed freely. After a few minutes, they finally calmed down and wiped their eyes. “I’m really glad I asked you to hang out with me, Mac.”
“I’m glad I said yes despite the shit circumstances. I really wanted to stay in by myself and hide from the world.”
“Why did you say yes, then?”
“You said the right thing.”
He grinned. “Good. I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship.”
Please let me know if you want to be tagged in this story. The more people that want to read it, the better. I want my muse to feel the pressure!
I’m a couple weeks behind on this, but here’s the list of books I read in 2018. I’ve broken it down by category, though this is pretty loose since, you know, genres bleed into one another and such. You can also find reviews of some of these books here, and I always take requests for reviews as well. Follow me on Goodreads to see what I’m reading and rating.
Let me know what you think if you’ve read any of these books or have recommendations, and, as always, please feel free to send me malicious personal attacks if I say something you disagree with.
Non-Fiction
Philosophy
Pragmatism and Feminism: Reweaving the Social Fabric by Charlene Haddock Seigfried
The Pragmatic Turn by Richard J. Bernstein
Race Matters by Cornel West
Democracy Matters: Winning the Fight Against Imperialism by Cornel West
American Philosophy: A Love Story by John Kaag
Ethics Without Ontology by Hilary Putnam
Meaning in Life and Why It Matters by Susan Wolf
The Variety of Values: Essays on Morality, Meaning, and Love by Susan Wolf
The Really Hard Problem: Meaning in a Material World by Owen J. Flanagan
Meaning in Life by Thaddeus Metz
The Human Eros: Eco-Ontology and the Aesthetics of Existence by Thomas Alexander
Naturalism and Normativity by Mario De Caro (Editor), David Macarthur (Editor)
Truth in Context: An Essay on Pluralism and Objectivity by Michael P. Lynch
Teaching to Transgress: Education as the Practice of Freedom by bell hooks
The Origin of Others by Toni Morrison
Experiments in Ethics by Kwame Anthony Appiah
Ethics in the Real World: 86 Brief Essays on Things that Matter by Peter Singer
The Ethics of Ambiguity by Simone de Beauvoir
A Very Easy Death by Simone de Beauvoir
The Story of Philosophy: The Lives and Opinions of the World's Greatest Philosophers by Will Durant
Why Buddhism is True: The Science and Philosophy of Enlightenment by Robert Wright
A Defense of Buddhist Virtue Ethics by Jack Hamblin
Living Buddha, Living Christ by Thich Nhat Hanh
The Infidel and the Professor: David Hume, Adam Smith, and the Friendship That Shaped Modern Thought by Dennis C. Rasmussen
The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World by Dalai Lama XIV, Desmond Tutu, and Douglas Carlton Abrams
Reality, Art and Illusion by Alan Watts
Democracy and Social Ethics by Jane Addams
Common Sense by Thomas Paine
From Bacteria to Bach and Back: The Evolution of Minds by Daniel C. Dennett
Science
Behave: The Biology of Humans at Our Best and Worst by Robert Sapolsky
The Rise and Fall of the Dinosaurs: A New History of a Lost World by Stephen Brusatte
Why Dinosaurs Matter by Kenneth Lacovara
I Contain Multitudes: The Microbes Within Us and a Grander View of Life by Ed Yong
The Evolution of Beauty: How Darwin's Forgotten Theory of Mate Choice Shapes the Animal World—And Us by Richard O. Prum
Gulp: Adventures on the Alimentary Canal by Mary Roach
Spook: Science Tackles the Afterlife by Mary Roach
Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex by Mary Roach
She Has Her Mother's Laugh: The Powers, Perversions, and Potential of Heredity by Carl Zimmer
Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari
21 Lessons for the 21st Century by Yuval Noah Harari
Caesar's Last Breath: Decoding the Secrets of the Air Around Us by Sam Kean
Why Evolution is True by Jerry Coyne
What Is Real?: The Unfinished Quest for the Meaning of Quantum Physics by Adam Becker
Brief Answers to the Big Questions by Stephen Hawking
Seven Brief Lessons on Physics by Carlo Rovelli
The Physics of Time by Carlo Rovelli
Physics of the Impossible: A Scientific Exploration of the World of Phasers, Force Fields, Teleportation, and Time Travel by Michio Kaku
The Spinning Magnet: The Force That Created the Modern World--and Could Destroy It by Alanna Mitchell
Pale Blue Dot: A Vision of the Human Future in Space by Carl Sagan
Visions for the 21st Century by Carl Sagan et al.
The Emperor of All Maladies: A Biography of Cancer by Siddhartha Mukherjee
What the Dog Saw and Other Adventures by Malcolm Gladwell
The Soul of the Night: An Astronomical Pilgrimage by Chet Raymo
The Virgin and the Mousetrap: Essays in Search of the Soul of Science by Chet Raymo
Politics/Race/Gender
The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by bell hooks
Bad Feminist by Roxane Gay
Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture by Roxane Gay (editor)
Dear Ijeawele, or a Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
Eloquent Rage: A Black Feminist Discovers Her Superpower by Brittney Cooper
Women & Power: A Manifesto by Mary Beard
The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin
I Am Not Your Negro by James Baldwin
The Origin of Others by Toni Morrison
Just Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption by Bryan Stevenson
Race Matters by Cornel West
Democracy Matters: Winning the Fight Against Imperialism by Cornel West
Stamped from the Beginning: The Definitive History of Racist Ideas in America by Ibram X. Kendi
The Souls of Black Folk by W.E.B. Du Bois
Evicted: Poverty and Profit in the American City by Matthew Desmond
Tears We Cannot Stand: A Sermon to White America by Michael Eric Dyson
What Truth Sounds Like: Robert F. Kennedy, James Baldwin, and Our Unfinished Conversation About Race in America by Michael Eric Dyson
White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin DiAngelo
White Trash: The 400-Year Untold History of Class in America by Nancy Isenberg
The Common Good by Robert Reich
Transgender History by Susan Stryker
Memoir
Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body by Roxane Gay
South of Forgiveness: A True Story of Rape and Responsibility by Thordis Elva
Letter to My Daughter by Maya Angelou
The Chicken Chronicles by Alice Walker
The Last Jew of Treblinka by Chil Rajchman
My Own Life by David Hume
Tough Shit: Life Advice from a Fat, Lazy Slob Who Did Good by Kevin Smith
Tibetan Peach Pie: A True Account of an Imaginative Life by Tom Robbins
Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass by Frederick Douglass
The Sun Does Shine: How I Found Life and Freedom on Death Row by Anthony Ray Hinton
Black Klansman: Race, Hate, and the Undercover Investigation of a Lifetime by Ron Stallworth
Calypso by David Sedaris
Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim by David Sedaris
Ink Spots by Brian McDonald
No Time to Spare: Thinking About What Matters by Ursula K. Le Guin
History/Biography
Hidden Figures: The American Dream and the Untold Story of the Black Women Mathematicians Who Helped Win the Space Race by Margot Lee Shetterly
Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee: An Indian History of the American West by Dee Brown
The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair That Changed America by Erik Larson
Barracoon: The Story of the Last "Black Cargo" by Zora Neale Hurston
No god but God: The Origins, Evolution and Future of Islam by Reza Aslan
God: A Human History by Reza Aslan
One Nation Under God: How Corporate America Invented Christian America by Kevin M. Kruse
The Etymologicon: A Circular Stroll through the Hidden Connections of the English Language by Mark Forsyth
Quackery: A Brief History of the Worst Ways to Cure Everything by Lydia Kang
Fiction
Literary Fiction
Go Tell It on the Mountain by James Baldwin
Another Country by James Baldwin
If Beale Street Could Talk by James Baldwin
Blues for Mister Charlie by James Baldwin
Going to Meet the Man by James Baldwin
The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
East of Eden by John Steinbeck
Bartleby the Scrivener by Herman Melville
Home by Toni Morrison
God Help the Child by Toni Morrison
The Yellow Wallpaper and Other Stories by Charlotte Perkins Gilman
Go Set a Watchman by Harper Lee
The Dead by James Joyce
Ishmael: An Adventure of the Mind and Spirit by Daniel Quinn
Waiting for Godot by Samuel Beckett
The Underground Railroad by Colson Whitehead
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
A Confederacy of Dunces by Jonh Kennedy Toole
The Dork of Cork by Chet Raymo
Genre Fiction
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
An Absolutely Remarkable Thing by Hank Green
Slice of Life by Kurt Vonnegut
2BR02B by Kurt Vonnegut
The Fifth Season by N.K. Jemisin
I, Robot by Isaac Asimov
Foundation by Isaac Asimov
Annihilation by Jeff VanderMeer
Kindred by Octavia E. Butler
Bloodchild and Other Stories by Octavia E. Butler
The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson
Pure Drivel by Steve Martin
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by J.K. Rowling
Pet Sematary by Stephen King
The Green Mile by Stephen King
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe by Douglas Adams
Life, the Universe and Everything by Douglas Adams
The Bad Beginning: A Series of Unfortunate Events #1 by Lemony Snicket
Ready Player One by Ernest Cline
Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk: A Modest Bestiary by David Sedaris
Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro
Worst of 2018
Every single book I read this past year had redemptive value. Even if it was total garbage, it still taught me some stuff (like how not to write a book). Even a bad book can be a good book if you let it be.
So, here’re a few books that didn’t quite hit the spot for me:
Ready Player One by Ernest Cline
Ishmael: An Adventure of the Mind and Spirit by Daniel Quinn
Go Set a Watchman by Harper Lee
Spook: Science Tackles the Afterlife by Mary Roach
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
Ink Spots by Brian McDonald
The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair That Changed America by Erik Larson
Best of 2018
It was genuinely difficult to choose my top books of 2018. What a literary year it has been for me. 2018 marks the most books I’ve read in a year, and I was lucky enough to come across some real game-changers. I finally read the Harry Potter series and, boy howdy, did it ever live up to the hype. What took me so long?? But this was, more than anything, the year of James Baldwin. He has made an indelible mark on me as a reader, a writer, and a human. What a year this has been! I hope to read a fraction as much beautiful, lovely, challenging, profound prose in 2019.
In no particular order, here are the books of 2018 that most moved me, shook me, rattled me, rolled me:
Behave: The Biology of Humans at Our Best and Worst by Robert Sapolsky
Teaching to Transgress: Education as the Practice of Freedom by bell hooks
The Pragmatic Turn by Richard J. Bernstein
Pragmatism and Feminism: Reweaving the Social Fabric by Charlene Haddock Seigfried
The Ethics of Ambiguity by Simone de Beauvoir
What Is Real?: The Unfinished Quest for the Meaning of Quantum Physics by Adam Becker
Pale Blue Dot: A Vision of the Human Future in Space by Carl Sagan
The Soul of the Night: An Astronomical Pilgrimage by Chet Raymo
The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin
Just Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption by Bryan Stevenson
Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body by Roxane Gay
Well, there you have it, folks. Here’s to many more good books in the years to come!
The unread story is not a story; it is little black marks on wood pulp. The reader, reading it, makes it live: a live thing, a story. —Ursula K. Le Guin