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dat-town · 9 months

Text

the things we lose in fire

Characters: Sunwoo & female reader

Setting & genre: fantasy, Alchemy of Souls au, not your typical enemies to lovers au

Summary: About a girl who slowly lowers her guards around a boy who is destined to be her enemy.

Warnings: canon-typical violence, folklore monsters, blood, burn marks, arson (the bermuda triangle is pretty much the mean girls of jeongjinrak and i may have enjoyed that too much)

Words: 13.6k

Author’s note: there are lots of references to the original kdrama but i think it can be read without seeing the show. there are spoilers about the season 2 ending though because the main characters are the next generation, relatives of the original characters

happy name day @lily-blue, i'm glad we can still fangirl over any piece of media just like we used to <3

the photo for the header is by sunset lover

Even with your eyes closed, you could feel the shift of energy behind you.

Blinking, you turned around just in time to raise your sword in front of your body in defense, to fend off the huge blow coming your way. You snickered as your feet slid backwards on the wooden floor from the strength of it and looked at your opponent with furrowed eyebrows.

Jaehyun looked awfully pleased with himself that he managed to surprise you. As if his ego wasn’t big enough already, he had mastered Chisu recently, an ability only a few of your age owned, and he liked to show it off. Too bad for him, you had your own tricks up your sleeves. So you just smirked back at him and before he could have started his next attack on you with his double swords slicing the air, you lunged forward with precise and sharp movements, forcing him to switch to defense and back away. You could hear the hollers around you but you paid them no mind as you tried to make a hit that could have been lethal if you used your real weapons instead of the practice ones Jeongjinrak let you.

You could tell that the boy started to get annoyed and him losing focus on his movements as he let his emotions take over played right into your hands. You felt the exact moment when he wanted to break out of the defense mode and you managed to swirl out of his sword's way easily then making your way behind him, you held your sword at the side of his neck threateningly.

“I win,” you exclaimed watching with a triumphant smile as the boy lowered his weapons.

The other students around you whooped and clapped, gathering around you, patting you on the back, congratulating, while Jaehyun had his own share of friends who consoled him after his defeat, telling him not to take it to his heart, to not care about her, you know how she is. But of course, the infamous Seo Yul’s nephew couldn’t let it go just like that.

“It’s not fair, you know. You have an advantage with those priestess abilities of yours,” he pointed out, panting, bitter, and you scoffed. It wasn’t the first time you heard that. Others liked to say that if it hadn’t been for your parents they would have beat you in a fair fight. You found their reasoning ridiculous. Nothing out there in the real world with its dangers was about fairness. Would they have whined like this when they faced an enemy stronger than them too? It wasn’t like you just sat around and you were this good. You had to learn how to control your family’s power just as much as you had to master Ryusu to unsheathe your sword like any other pupils of this institute for mages. Your mother had stayed up with you when your fever kept you up after the first signs of your power and your father had taken you to the mountains to practice every summer. Both of them had faced their own hardships and struggles with their powers, they both understood the envy you had gotten for the abilities you had been born with. Not that it helped when you were in a room full of boys with raging testosterone, wanting nothing more than to prove their manliness by defeating you. A girl on top of everything.

“Excuses. Tell that to yourself if it helps you sleep at night,” you rolled your eyes at Jaehyun and shrugged after you slid your sword back into its scabbard. “It’s not like I can switch it off.”

He was just hurt that his pride was wounded with another lost sparring against you. He took great pride in being from the big Seo family, associated with the royal family after all and being the nephew of Jeongjinrak’s leader he had all hopes laid out there for him. But even with his Chisu, he wasn’t as good as you. You didn’t even have to extinguish all the lights in the chamber like you had done with Juyeon last time.

“That last move was so good! You have to teach me that sometime,” Changmin threw an arm over your shoulder and you flashed him a grateful smile. Having a friend like him surely had its perks.

You asked him what he wanted to eat for lunch, eager to fill your stomach after the exercise but before the boy could tell you all about the honey biscuits he craved, the ones your mom always sent you, there was a commotion by the door that attracted everybody’s attention. Hyungseo basically fell through the door when it opened.

“You won’t believe what just happened! Haknyeon just saw the new mage pupil with Master Seo,” he said in a too serious tone for such a simple statement.

“And?” Chanhee asked with disinterest lacing his words, clearly above caring about such boring matters. The bearer of news looked around, waiting a long beat before blurting out what was followed by a stunned silence:

“It’s Kim Sunwoo.”

Everybody had heard of Kim Sunwoo.

He had almost as many gossips about his birth as you did. Why? Because your fates were connected. It was written in the stars.

Everybody had a plaque of constellations from the time they were born, it was kept in the royal observatory, Cheonbugwan. Your maternal grandfather had worked there and even though he had been long gone before you were born, you had always thought of him when you entered the place, imagining him hovering above the black plaques splattered with white spots.

You were six when your mother had first taken you there. She wasn't supposed to but King Gowon had a soft spot towards your parents – saying he shared a turtle with them had been an ongoing joke that you never understood –, so he allowed the exception. Your parents had suffered a lot due to your father's constellation after all.

You had heard their story over and over: Jang Uk, only son of the Jang family, had been born under the King's Star in the sky, destined for majestic things. Almost everybody who knew about it had been killed just to keep it as a secret, to not let anybody know that Jang Uk was actually the son of the belated king who practiced the dark magic called alchemy of souls to switch bodies with Jang Gang gwanju. Your mother's father, Cho Chung was a constellation recorder mage at the time, one of the unfortunate ones who had to die, taking your entire maternal family with him, so the king at the time could rule. Your mother had been taken in by a man who had trained her into a deadly assassin. Naksu had spread fear while she wanted to get revenge but she ended up switching souls – or more like sharing souls – with a girl who was unbeknownst to her the lost daughter of the Jin family, a powerful priestess. Your father had fallen in love with her as an assassin and as a priestess too and that's how you had been born as the daughter of the two most powerful people of Daeho who had gone against every odd to be together.

Of course, it was only the version you and the family knew. Everybody else could only see that Jang Uk, the most powerful mage they had seen, the always rebel, had gone against Jinyowon’s strict leader and married her confined eldest daughter with whom they had saved Daeho.

With parents like that, you were expected of a lot. Especially after being born under the Morningstar which, as your mother explained, was a sign that you were destined to bring light into darkness. There were whispers about your fate all around Daeho.

Just as much as about Kim Sunwoo’s.

His life was irrevocably intertwined with yours since he was said to have been born with the energy of the Firebird that your parents had killed.

You and Changmin were out to visit the iron master of the town for the new throwing stars Jeongjinrak ordered. Some, like that prick Jaehyun, would have thought that it was beneath you to do such things but you actually liked to do errands like this. Things might not have been as strict as they had been in your parents' time, not even allowing for family visits unless it was an urgent situation, but the training center of Songrim still felt stuffy sometimes. You liked to visit the lively market or play stone skipping with your friends whenever you had had enough of the constant sword and mind practice. Master Seo was your parents' friend – as well as Songrim's leader, Park Danggu –, so he made sure to often remind you that you didn't have to push yourself too much, that you should not break under the pressure of expectations but it was hard. Both of your parents had defeated death at least once, how could you just live a normal mage's or priestess' life? You were ought to do grand things.

One day.

Today your biggest problem was how to steal some time to visit Kim ahjussi's chicken soup stall before you had to go back to Jeongjinrak. That was, until a bright voice called your name. You let out a groan. Just what you missed from your day.

"Y/N! Changmin! So nice to see you. Running an errand I see," the boy dressed in silk stated cheerfully.

"Your Highness," your friend greeted the Crown Prince politely when he slipped into your view, successfully halting your steps. Sometimes you truly wondered how his eunuch kept up with him but the loyal servant was behind him like a shadow.

"Youngjae," you sighed, calling him by his first name, a privilege you had because you had played with him since you two had been kids. Your mother had helped the king find a suitable queen after all. However, with the boy following you around like a hyperactive puppy, some people thought he was pursuing you with serious intentions because you marrying into the royal family would have meant adjoining multiple influential families of Daeho. But it was as unlikely as the Sun suddenly rising from the West. Youngjae was like your little brother at most, you couldn’t look at him any other way.

"Any plans on visiting the palace any time soon? It gets boring without company."

"I'm sure you have more than enough people around you," you eyed the poor eunuch who always followed the boy around.

"But that's not the same, they are court servants, they don't have a choice," the prince whined and tried to use his puppy eyes on you.

Before you started your official training, you indeed spent a lot of time on palace grounds with him, especially when your parents were out hunting down whatever creature terrorized the people. They either took you to Jinyowon to stay with your cousins or the palace during those times. That's where you learned sparring from palace guards, ate the most delicious food in seven provinces and decided that you were never ever going to marry into the royal family. You could not stand the hypocrisy and conspiracies. You might have gotten used to the whispers behind your back but the palace was a whole nother level. You would have felt sorry for Youngjae if he experienced the same but he seemed blissfully unaware of his surroundings like the spoiled brat he was.

"We could have a sparring battle! Winner gets to make a wish!" The prince threw in as if it was such a novel idea but you only had to exchange a glance with Changmin to know that he had already had enough of this, too.

"You have lost every single time before. Didn't you have enough?" You sighed but Youngjae just grinned, ever so optimistic.

"It's called determination. Just watch and see, one day I will beat you."

"Good luck with that," you said a bit bitterly, internally adding but that day won't be today as you turned the corner the next time you saw a chance for it. There were many people at the market and many stalls with colorful goods put on display, so you slipped underneath a table, crawling behind the stall and slipped through a crack between two wooden houses, moving farther from the busy streets of the market.

It might not have been nice, slipping away like that but your family was already obligated to attend the equinox ceremony at the palace over the next weekend and you had more important things to care about than chit-chatting with a bored prince.

You looked behind you, checking the crowd just in case Youngjae could keep up with you but you saw no sign of him or Changmin. You hoped your friend could get away too without being dragged into an unnecessary fight with His Highness to save his pride. You were still busy looking over the mass of people when you stumbled as your shoulder hit something firm.

"Sorry," you mumbled on instinct since you were brought up to be polite but a moment later you froze, confused. Sure, you didn't look ahead where you were going while you were watching your back, so anybody could have thought it was natural to bump into somebody on your way but you usually didn't make mistakes like that. With your inherited power to sense energy, you could usually tell if you were near somebody. But this time, something was off. You couldn't have named what was different but something was unique about this person's energy and it didn't feel right. You turned your gaze up at the stranger but half of his face was covered with a scarf and he wore a hood over his head. You could only catch a glimpse of his dark eyes, crimson locks and sharp gaze before he continued his way, his long sword draped across his back like a warning.

You looked after him with furrowed brows, confused but snapped out of your trance when somebody called your name. You straightened your back and looked at Changmin who waved to you from the other side of the road, alone. You smiled back at him mischievously because it seemed so that His Highness had lost another game of his.

Jeongjinrak had already been buzzing with anticipation and rumors about the new arrival but it wasn't until the next afternoon sword practice that Kim Sunwoo arrived.

The lively chatter of the hall died down as soon as Master Seo walked in carrying an authoritative aura around him despite his youthful features. Then the whispering started because the man was followed by a boy wearing the mage trainees' silver-blue uniform, his burgundy locks kept out of his face with a similar headband. He didn't look scary or vengeful like the rumors suggested but there was some kind of searing coldness around him, something unusual about his magic, you could tell, so you didn't take your eyes off him.

"Everyone, this is Kim Sunwoo, the institution's newest student," Seo Yul introduced the newbie calmly, not reprimanding the murmuring crowd for once.

"Can he even wield a sword?"

"Does he really do dark magic?"

"Is he going to practice with us?"

Hushed questions and curious gazes were sent in the boy's direction but he seemed unbothered by it all. He just stood there and stared ahead, hands behind his back. His presence was a bit… underwhelming. The rumors about him claimed he was dangerous and deadly, that he was about to bring destruction like the Firebird whose energy he had been apparently born with. But he looked like just a boy and really, you should have known better than to believe gossip after the telltales about you as well.

"He's going to join the training from now. Welcome him nicely," Master Seo finished his speech and clapped his hands, encouraging the pupils to get into position around the practice dolls. The place wasn't big enough for everybody to have their own, so you usually took turns in groups of 2 or 3 to practice different attacking techniques.

Everybody seemed wary of letting the new boy join their group and he didn't seem keen to ask about it either. You exchanged a glance with Changmin as a silent question and he shrugged with no objection. He was friends with you too despite the rumors about you, so you knew he wasn't judgemental when it came to prophecies. Having a High Priestess as your mother you did believe in fate but you also thought that it was not unchangeable and often these prophecies were vague enough to not know their true meaning until much later.

So you were about to call over for the new boy, telling him to join your group, so you could show him how these kinds of practices worked but before you could have done so, Jaehyun stepped in the way of Kim Sunwoo. With his pride you knew that it was bad news, especially when Juyeon and Younghoon, his equally popular and self-assured friends, followed.

"Is it true that your parents are dead?" Jaehyun asked and you sucked in a breath. Of course, he had to pick bones with the new kid on his first day. He just couldn't sit on his spoiled ass in peace. Typical.

"Why does it matter to you?" Sunwoo spoke up for the first time since he had arrived and his voice was deeper than you expected but just as cold as his appearance. And even though he was talking quietly, in the tense silence of the practice room where barely anybody pretended to not pay attention his words could be heard clearly.

"Did you kill them?" Jaehyun pressed on, such an asshole move.

"Why, wanna die too?" The redhead spat back at him but Jaehyun just laughed as if it was funny.

You looked around but saw no supervisors which, in retrospect, was no surprise, Jaehyun usually only put on his big boy pants when his uncle or his men weren't around.

"I was just curious. How can somebody walk around with the blood of their parents on their hands," he said and that was when you felt a sudden shift in the energy, something hot and surging like lava boiling up, then a moment later Sunwoo unsheathed his sword, the point of its blade stopping right under Jaehyun's chin. The metal didn't glow blue like usually when a mage's energy shifted into ot, rather it looked like it was smoldering as if it burned scorching hot. You had never seen something like this.

"One more word about my parents and I will walk out of here with your blood on my hands," Sunwoo hissed and based on the arrogant grin on the other's face, he just couldn't get the seriousness of the situation. He was so sure that nobody would dare to hurt him as a relative of the King. But he couldn't feel the darkening energy that started to envelope the room, the building up anger and the weight of such power that was ready to burst.

"Just shut up, Jaehyun," you snapped at the boy harshly and tugged on Kim Sunwoo's arm that held the weapon to pull him away. He barely nudged and his skin felt feverish even over the layers of his uniform. You yanked your hand back because it almost burned, what the hell.

Sunwoo's dark eyes focused on you for a moment and it was when you realized where you had already sensed his energy. At the market a few days ago. You couldn't feel the unusualness of his energy this time when he walked into the hall but now, it was sharp and clear like the smell of rain after a storm.

The boy glared at you as if he had any reason to be mad at you and before anybody could have stopped him, he pushed past Jaehyun's gang, out of the main hall.

Him storming out of the place wasn't left uncommented, of course. Master Seo's nephew claimed that the newbie overreacted while others muttered about his bad temper and how the situation could have gotten worse if you didn't interfere. Not that Jaehyun was grateful, he clearly thought that he was handling the situation perfectly. And Kim Sunwoo… he might not have needed your help to protect himself but his actions clearly showed that he had no idea what kind of people were at Jeongjinrak. If he had seriously injured Jaehyun, his father wouldn't have left him unpunished and as an orphan Sunwoo probably didn't have anybody powerful enough who would have stood up for him. It was better if he didn't stir trouble with the Seo–Lee family.

You didn't know what to expect from Kim Sunwoo after his first day bravado but he showed up the next day at the practice room earlier than anybody and he sat in the back at the history lesson held by Park Danggu. His swordsmanship wasn't elegant at all, it looked like he either self-studied it or picked it up from a very shabby master but even like that, he had clearly reached Jipsu and Ryusu because he could gather energy of water flow and direct it to his opponent during a fight. He had a very street-like technique if it could even be named one but he still managed to land the three blows needed to win in your practice fights against Younghoon who was left speechless on the ground after the last energy burst pushed him to his butt. It made you wonder whether he had come to your training center to learn how to master his skills to their full potential or he had another reason. Most people don't join Jeongjinrak at his level or as late as his age.

Sunwoo seemed to have become an expert in ignoring Jaehyun's remarks which (to your greatest delight) annoyed the hell out of the noble guy. However, sometimes you could tell that the accusations hit too close to home. You could sense the shift in energy or get a whiff of smoke and when you walked by Sunwoo's seat, you saw that he had left a burnt handprint on the wooden desk. Even though Sunwoo didn't hurt anybody, he wasn't particularly nice to the other pupils, which didn't help the rumors. Some said he would snap one day and burn the whole place down and judging by the dark look in his eyes, you wouldn't have been too surprised either. Though unlike others you doubted he had come to Jeongjinrak with that purpose.

"I heard there's some uproar at the academy these days," your father brought up casually one dinner when you were allowed to be outside of the establishment. "Not gonna lie, it has been strangely calm ever since Yul took over."

"He's working hard, come on," your mother tsked, amused as always whenever it was about their friends and their bickering.

"I'm not saying he doesn't, but he might get bored there at this rate," your father mused out loud, picking out a honey biscuit from the bowl on the table and you knew he was just joking because he had done a lot so that Daeho could be as peaceful as it was.

"It's not really an uproar. Just a new guy," you shrugged. You didn't want to give too much meaning to the prophecies and predicaments about his and your future, you didn't want that to influence anything. Not after how unfairly mage masters had treated your father in the past because of such things.

"Just a guy with the Firebird's energy," your father pointed out mimicking the casual way you talked and your gazes met when you looked up to glare at him sulkily. You didn't want to worry your mother, so it would have been better if she didn't even know it. Wishful thinking, your father never kept secrets from your mother. Who was now looking at you, bewildered.

"Is it true?"

"Yeah. But he isn't that bad. Like, yes, his energy feels a bit wrong and wild but he keeps it under control," you said because the last thing you wanted was to be withdrawn from training just because your mother was worried. You were often told that you were a lot like her actually: reckless when it was about your own safety but fiercely protective when it came to your loved ones.

"Well, not every unknown or powerful is evil. There better not be another witch hunt out of fear," your mother concluded with a hand over yours, lightly squeezing. "It's actually better that he is here, supervised than being out there, doing god knows what. If he becomes dangerous, we can protect you here."

You sighed, having had enough of being treated like a baby.

"Mom! I can protect myself."

"Sure you can, our brave daughter," your father joined with a fond smile and ruffled your hair. He stuffed honey biscuits into your mouth to suppress your big girl complaints.

You could be the best mage pupil at Jeongjinrak but you would always be the beloved daughter of Cho Yeong and Jang Uk.

You weren't looking for trouble, really. It was a mere precaution. Keep your friends close but your enemies closer or whatever. If you were indeed destined nemesis with Kim Sunwoo, you should have known what he was up to. Did he really only come to Jeongjinrak to be a better mage? Did he even want to be an integrated part of society? Where did he learn how to fight like that? What else was there to his story?

You had a dozen questions which could only be answered by the guy himself but even after weeks of attending the academy, he still wasn't befriending anybody. Not even Haknyeon with whom he had been doing sparring practice lately. So you did the next best thing you could do instead of talking to him: you followed him when you caught sight of him slipping away under the dark of night after the curfew started.

It wasn't the first time you broke this rule of Jeongjinrak but it was the first time when it was because of a boy.

Sunwoo didn't go far, just over the walls, to a small abandoned house with an extinguished pit of fire in its garden. He stopped there, circling around the charred black ground then sat down with his legs crossed. You watched him from over the top of the walls, not wanting to make any further noise by jumping down on the other end and risking getting caught. You wanted to see what he was doing without him knowing after all. So then you waited.

After a few moments passed and nothing happened, Sunwoo looked like he was in the middle of a deep meditation, so you kind of regretted the awkwardly uncomfortable position you chose. You had good stamina but pulling yourself up onto a wall with only half your weight supported by a tree branch… it wasn't ideal. But then, after more minutes of just waiting, something happened, something that shouldn't have been possible: the dry leaves and branches in front of the sitting boy suddenly burst into flames as if he had stroked stones against each other to spark a fire. However, Sunwoo did no such thing, in fact he did not move at all. While he was with his back to you, so you couldn't tell for sure but you would have bet that he had his eyes closed. He just shifted energy to fire and if it wasn't enough proof, you saw him raise a hand and form a little ball of fire in his palm. It was the same thing you were taught to do with water but you had never seen, never even heard of anybody being able to do that with fire.

Your magic was based on the energy of the sky that ruled the wind, the clouds and rain. It was the first thing kids learned. It was a definite truth like the Sun rising in the East. It was taught at the first class you took at Jeongjinrak: that the energy from above crashed into the water basin next to Daeho, Lake Gyeongcheondo, and it brought powerful magic to the ground. The same lake that became the burial place of the Firebird twenty or so years ago. Right when Sunwoo was born.

You should have gone back to the dormitory then, finally knowing what he was doing but questions kept stirring up in you and you couldn't just leave. As you straightened yourself from the cramping position, the branch creaked beneath your weight and you could see Sunwoo perk his ears at the sound. It was time to quit hiding.

"So this is why you sneak out? Honestly, I expected something more exciting," you spoke up casually as you swang one leg after the other over the wall and hopped down elegantly on the other side. You dusted your hands down in your overskirt and stepped closer to the small fire.

"Like what? Hiding bodies?" The boy asked stiffly.

He was watching you as if he couldn't tell your motives and he was probably right to do so. But you didn't spy on him just so you could tell on him or blackmail him, it was merely to satisfy your own curiosity.

"Pranking Jaehyun's gang or something," you said with a nonchalant shrug which made Sunwoo scoff. Unlike his usual neutral expression, he almost looked amused then, so you decided it was safe to ask more.

"You know who I am, right?" You started off as you sat down across him, watching as he was drawing patterns into the ash. It might have sounded like a self-flattery question but you knew your reputation and most people didn't act around you like he did. Considering that you were even said to be each others' nemesis.

"Who doesn't?" Sunwoo rolled his eyes but it didn't quite answer your question. Or well, not the underlying one you were actually curious about. Of course, he knew you, you were in one class but it didn't mean he knew about your family, your power.

"And the prophecy about us?"

"I don't believe in such things," he said coldly, looking up at you. He looked serious and you didn't know how to feel about it. Obviously you were glad that he wasn't outright antagonistic against you but you did believe in fate and him not caring about it was off putting. "Why? Did you expect me to attack you the moment we met?"

So he did know about it.

"No," you mumbled, feeling a bit confused because whenever you did imagine meeting him, you thought it would be under much more disturbing circumstances. With Daeho in danger for example. Or that he would be evil. He didn't seem like that but one could never know for real.

So you changed the topic. There was no use sticking to one about destiny when he didn't believe in it.

"Why are you out here practicing alone?" You looked around the abandoned neighborhood. Sure, people might have looked at him weirdly if they saw he was practicing a kind of skill that was unlike any other you had encountered before but that was because people were always wary of unfamiliar things.

"It's not something others can teach me. My old mentor said that it's unprecedented, so…" Sunwoo just shrugged, resigned. "I get it. It's unnatural. Most people fear me."

You knew that feeling, being looked at with fear just because you could do something others couldn't. Being the daughter of a powerful priestess and a mage with a dark past without others knowing that your mother's soul had also been an assassin could have either made you an outcast or popular. You weren't a fan of either but the mage students at Jeongjinrak would have never dared to treat you the way they did Sunwoo.

“And your parents?” You blurted out, wondering if they could accept him the way he was or they were afraid too. Because you were lucky in that sense because your parents understood your feeling of oddness among your peers. Sunwoo however took your question in a different direction and it rendered you speechless for a moment.

“They died. In fire.”

Oh. So Jaehyun was right about one thing but it still didn't mean that it was Sunwoo's fault. But the way he cast his eyes down, the ember warming up under his stare, you could feel his regret and guilt consuming his energy, so you didn't dare to ask about details.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, not in pity but sympathy.

Sunwoo hummed but didn't react otherwise. He didn't seem angry or bothered. It made you wonder when was the last time he felt understood, listened to. It made you want to pat his back and tell him that it was going to be okay.

You were quiet for a while, listening to the crickets chirp and you were sure Sunwoo stalled his practice because of you, so you wanted to reassure him that you weren't afraid of him, that he could keep trying but what came out of your mouth was more like a curious inquiry.

"Don't take it in a negative way but why did you come to Jeonjinrak? If you still need to learn by yourself."

The boy sighed but still answered patiently as if he believed you would leave him alone once you ran out of your questions. Or maybe he didn’t want to be left alone. He seemed a bit lonely.

"My mentor was old, he told me to come here if he couldn't teach me anymore. He once saw me trying with a sword and the way I lost control over fire. He tried his best to teach me the basics of energy control but I had nobody to actually practice fighting with. I'm still not very good."

That he said but he never lashed out and burned anything down no matter how much Jaehyun pushed him. You thought he didn't give enough credit to himself.

“Let’s train together. Not to brag but I’m the best among Master Seo’s pupils,” you exclaimed with your chin raised high proudly, a bit playful and you pretended to feel offended when Sunwoo looked at you doubtfully. “Hah, don’t look at me like that! You don’t believe me?”

You stood up, dusting off your skirt, and drew your sword out, poking the guy’s chest with the blade’s pointy end gently to nudge him too. He laughed, genuinely, for the first time since you had known him but complied. He pushed himself to his feet too and faced you with his drawn sword.

You striked first, just testing the ground, his level, but he blocked easily, so your little sparring practice turned heated soon. Heated in a literal sense because while your sword was glowing blue from the floating water energy in the air but after a while, Sunwoo’s started to look like it was burning, with a reddish glow to it. You could feel his energy too, just like anybody’s else, but this was new because unlike most people’s energy state, his felt unpredictable. He almost scorched you with one fireball sent your way but you managed to get out of its way at the last minute before using the boy’s apologetic self to your advantage to attack back. After a while, he stopped holding back and fearing that his power would hurt you or get out of control. It felt freeing, you could tell, and watching his smile lightened by the sunrise’s glow, you felt lighter too.

There was no prophecy worth dedicating your life to just to despise somebody who didn’t deserve it and really, maybe you could write your own history.

Once he let his guards down and let people get closer, Sunwoo made friends easily at Jeongjinrak. Changmin was excited that he finally had somebody to annoy you with and Haknyeon now had a study buddy in the mage library because Sunwoo had a lot to catch up on when it came to theoretical and history knowledge of your kind. When it came to practical classes, he usually joined your group and you could tell that it annoyed the hell out of Jaehyun’s circle that he wasn’t a lonely wolf anymore.

He wasn’t the only one watching you warily though. You could see Master Seo eyeing your duo worriedly whenever he passed by the practice room but didn’t interfere. You were sure he knew what was said about your future and that he meant well but you hoped he wouldn’t tell on you to your parents. Based on how protective they were of you, you knew they wouldn’t have been too happy about your sudden friendship with the boy with the Firebird’s energy.

And then there was Youngjae, of course. He had no idea about the prophecy and yet, he just had to be nosy.

“I don’t like that you hang out with him so much,” he said when you were in his royal quarters, feeding the turtles in the garden pond.

You just rolled your eyes, didn’t even spare time to answer as you crouched down, holding out a fresh leaf to one of the animals. Times like this always remind you of your childhood. When you were too young and too naive and your parents sent you and the Crown Prince to the garden to play while they talked about politics and dangers. They still treated you like kids but you knew better now.

“Are you listening? He’s said to be dangerous,” Youngjae whined and you weren’t sure he was more worried or jealous. Not the romantic kind of jealousy though. There might have been rumors but you didn’t think that the prince had interest in you like that. Sure, he might have been more comfortable being close to you than any foreigner princess he hadn’t known, but he was more jealous of Sunwoo getting to spend time with you while he couldn’t. He had been surrounded by people all the time and yet, he was so, so lonely. The fate of a ruler.

You acted nonchalant whenever he whined but secretly you hoped that his future bride would be able to fill this void in him.

“Who said that?” You asked, disinterest coloring your voice pale.

“Everybody!”

You sighed and after leaving the last piece of leaf on the ground, among the moss, you stood up to face Youngjae.

“Don’t believe everything you hear,” you lectured him with a disapproving tsk before curling your lips into a confident smile. “And even if he was dangerous, you shouldn’t underestimate me.”

You bowed towards the boy lightly, polite within the walls of the palace, and when he tried to follow you, you scolded him that it wouldn’t be proper of him to go after you into the outhouse which made him flustered down the core and gave you the chance to slip away without him or any of the servants following closely.

However, you passed by the outhouse without stopping by and wandered towards the king’s quarters. He had summoned your parents over an important issue and you wanted to know what it was because your always recklessly brave mother looked worried when she read the summoning letter. And if anybody caught you snooping around, you could just tell them that you didn’t feel well and were looking for your parents to ask for a leave. Not that they would have believed you ‒ they knew you too well ‒ but others might have.

“But… how did it get out? I thought, only Jin priestesses can open the door to Jinyowon,” King Gowon’s deep voice was hushed. He clearly didn’t want others to know about whatever caused disturbance. It must have been important if he needed your parents, both of them, to help him out.

“That is true but there might be other hidden entrances we don’t know of like the ones from the mirror world or Gwido,” your mother enlightened him and you furrowed your brows. You had no idea that the dangerous relic storage of your maternal home had other entrances other than the one overgrown with ivy creeper, the one that couldn’t have been forced open. It only opened for those of the Jin blood. You had been there a few times, always a short visit and you were never allowed to touch anything but you had heard stories of the time of Great Chaos. Jinyowon was on the verge of collapse and many things, monsters, escaped. They started causing hunger, drought and deaths, so it was your parents’ task to put them back to their lawful places.

“You should capture it as soon as possible. The last thing we need is disturbance before the the Moon Festival,” the king said and hearing your father’s promise and steps, you quickly pulled away from the wall to get away.

Their conversation didn’t leave you be though. What exactly had got out of Jinyowon and how?

You and Sunwoo kept practicing both in daylight and after the Sun went down.

He had improved a lot in his control and precision over the weeks but you were still better. There was one thing in which he was excellent at though, with much more experience that you had: archery. He had said it was because he was used to living close to the woods and hunting for his own food but you thought there was more to it. So while you were teaching him energy control, he taught you archery, it was only fair.

“You’re getting better but your stance is still too unstable,” he noted after you two checked where your arrows managed to hit the target. They weren’t as scattered as they used to be and you hit the board with each arrow at least, but it was nowhere near as concentrated around the center as Sunwoo’s. Your aim still needed some work.

“I’m trying but I’m not used to standing still for this kind of thing,” you admitted irritatedly because the fighting technique you learned involved a lot of movements and agility and logically speaking you knew that even if you needed to use your archery skills in real life it would be on the go but to improve your aim, first you needed to learn how to keep steady.

“I know. Get into position again,” Sunwoo instructed you and with a huff of sigh, you walked farther from the target with your arrows back into your quiver and faced the tree from a distance, ready to draw your weapon when the boy stood behind you.

“Close your eyes,” he said quietly, his breath fanning over your neck. Fighting a shiver and a snicker about his weird teaching technique, you did as he told you. The world went dark around you as you closed your eyelids and you were especially aware of the roughness of wood against your calloused fingertips, the heat of another body beside yours and the sound of your own breathing.

Sunwoo put a hand over your shoulder and pulled it backwards until you straightened your back, getting into the correct position. He then fixed your fingers around your bow leaving little tingles in their wake behind. You took a deep breath when his touch brushed against the ribbon in your hair.

“What do you feel?” Sunwoo asked quietly, his voice fighting the breeze of air, swimming through the ocean of your thoughts.

“Calm,” you surprised yourself with your honesty as you realized that the feelings that washed over you was serenity. Ever since you overheard your parents talking with the king and you learned from Lady Kim that your family home was empty for days, your thoughts had been running wild and you jumped into training after training to suppress the turbulence of your mind. Sunwoo didn’t ask what was up with you, but he readily practiced with you until you were exhausted enough to fall asleep.

“Good. Then try to concentrate on other senses of yours except sight. Take a sniff of the smell of spring, feel the wind lead your arrow, hear the birds, feel the tenseness of your bow… then when you took in your entire surroundings, open your eyes and shoot,” the boy said and you didn’t needed to see or have special priestess powers to be able to tell he stepped farther away but you didn’t open your eyes.

You followed his lead and let your senses strengthen as you focused from flower to flower, tree to tree. As a priestess you had a very sensitive power to be able to tell where and what kind of energy was and even though it was the strongest in mages and other magical creatures, it was everywhere around you: under the ground, up in the sky, in every blade of grass and blossom that fell from the trees. The more you let yourself get immersed in nature, the clearer you saw what was around you without having to open your eyes. Then you finally understood what Sunwoo had said that the key was to be aware of your surroundings.

You slowly pried your eyes open, your sole focus on the target in front of you, clearer than ever. You drew the bow string tight and sent the arrow flying and it hit the target, bull’s eye.

“Oh my, did you see that?” You turned to face Sunwoo in disbelief, excitement bubbling in your veins from the achievement while a proud smile spread over the boy’s face. He probably took pride in your improvement similarly as when you saw him land a Chisu blow the other day.

“See? I told you that you can do it,” he said, the wind brushing his burgundy hair into his face which made you want to reach there and rake your fingers through his locks. But you just stood there, staring, the energy flowing around you and you couldn’t help but blurt out your fresh observation.

“Your heart is beating fast.”

Sunwoo’s smile didn’t fade. He didn’t protest. He knew it would have been in vain or maybe he didn’t even want to.

“Because you are deadly,” he said and you let out a scoff at the teasing, ready with a retort that died on your tongue when you heard the terrified scream.

Your eyes widened and you exchanged a brief look with Sunwoo before without any spoken word, both of you started running towards the source of the noise. The closer you got to the town, the more screams were heard and people came running from the opposite direction which only slowed you down. You could tell by the unmistakable smell of smoke that something was burning, yet the heat from the flames when you got there still felt haunting. You could already see Songrim officials handle the situation by directing water to the fire to put it out but you wanted to help. You crouched down next to an old lady who must have fallen and offered her a helping hand, hoping that she wasn't too shaken up. You didn't expect her to mumble about the sudden attack, the fire ball bursting in front of the gates and the chaos. Much less the frightened look on her face as she looked up.

“It’s him!” A woman pointed to your left and muscles pulled taut, ready to face the enemy, you turned, pointing your sword at the said direction only to see Sunwoo there.

You furrowed your brows, confused, but the woman didn’t take back her accusation and others around you backed her up too, claiming that it was him setting a fire to the noble’s house. What? Who were they confusing him with?

“That’s impossible. He was with me the whole time,” you shouted over the chaos, lowering your sword but the murmurs barely subdued and people still looked at him in fear. It left a bitter taste in your mouth as you watched Sunwoo's shocked, saddened face. With his reputation, it was almost too easy to blame him.

So close to the biggest festival in the capital, Songrim didn't want to risk being accused of having bias when it came to Jeongjinrak's students, so as the publicly appointed suspect was Sunwoo, he had to go through a not too pleasant interrogation.

Since you were his alibi, you were questioned as well and since both of you were outside of the training center when it happened, you knew that you would face Master Seo’s punishment for sneaking out and breaking the rules anyways.

“And are you absolutely sure that he was with you the entire time?” Your uncle, Songrim’s leader, looked at you expectantly and without hesitation, you nodded.

“I told you: we were practicing archery then we heard the scream at the same time and went to see what happened. We found the building already burning though by the time we got there. No sign of who did it,” you recited for the third time at least when the same question was asked differently.

However, this was the only occasion when uncertainty hit you as you thought back on events. Could you really be sure? Was Sunwoo really with you from the beginning to the end? You had your eyes closed for minutes. Could he… Nah, that was crazy. Why would he have done that anyways? He had no motive and it was unrealistic that he could have left and come back without you noticing.

“Alright. I believe you but please, try to stay out of trouble. At least until your parents are not out of town,” Park Danggu pleaded with a fatherly tone and you knew that your parents would know about your little rebellious act by his next letter to them. Even if he wasn’t friends with your father, his wife was your mother’s little sister, so there were really no secrets between them. You didn't make any promises though.

“Do you know anything about them? Or how is their search going?” You grabbed onto the chance to ask because you haven't heard much of them since they had left. They had sent you honey biscuits every three days and it was their sign that they were alright but you didn't know anything about the mission itself.

“Don’t worry about them. They know what they are doing. I’m sure they will be back soon. They are honor guests at the festival after all,” Songrim's leader tried to reassure you with a smile. Since you were done there, you bowed out of respect, thanking when he invited you over to dinner sometime, claiming that the twins, your oldest cousins, were missing you.

Things were quiet for a while. The rules got stricter around Jeongjinrak and the other mage pupils blamed you and Sunwoo as if they didn’t sneak out from time to time. Though it was true that you were the only one who got caught, what should you have done? Ignore the screams and sneak back to the comfort of your bed without trying to help at least? Cowards.

So you thought it was a one time thing, a misunderstanding but one night when the moon was at its brightest you woke to a heavy weight over your chest. It was like waking up from a nightmare without remembering any details. You put a hand over your heart and tried to concentrate, to identify this bad feeling.

Your mother could not only feel energy better than any mage but she could tell exactly what kind of energy it was. That was why she and your father were the perfect team to hunt down creatures of ill-intent. You didn't have her expertise but you could tell that the energy that was floating around you then had something malicious and wrong about it. You got out of bed, peaking out of your room but there was only eerie silence.

Then, the next moment you heard the watchbell's loud sound. You grabbed an overcoat to cover your nightgown and your sword. On the corridor, you met other sleepy students in similar attire as you all ran towards the gathering place.

"Changmin!" You called over to the boy when you saw him and he caught up with you quickly.

"Hey, do you know what's happening?"

"No idea. Something just feels off," you said and glanced around, looking for other familiar faces.

You had gone a bit further away already when you eventually noticed the smoke. You weren't the only one, others pointed it out too and you could hear the gasp.

"The library is burning!" Somebody yelled and a simple sentence like that was enough to cause havoc because instead of stopping and waiting at the gathering place, most people continued the run to the building on fire. You exchanged a glance with Changmin, then you both headed towards that direction too.

The closer you got, the stronger the strange feeling was. You tried to ignore it and see if you could help but Master Seo and his men were already handling the fire while some were chasing down the arsonist. You could hear people yelling about him escaping towards Jeongjinrak's Eastern walls. You didn't hesitate: you climbed up the nearest building and ran in the same direction from rooftop to rooftop. Without the crowd and distractions on the ground, you were much faster like this. Fast enough to see the hooded black figure swing over the wall, jumping right after him.

"Stop!" You shouted but, of course, it was only in vain, a way to tire your throat out, not the troublemaker. But since he wasn't listening, you had no choice but to attack, sending a wave of energy his way to knock him off his feet. He stumbled but carried on, determined until the end you had to give it to him.

Your second blow was stronger, the assailant fell and it gave you enough momentum to catch up with him. You pushed his body more to the ground by his shoulders and hovered over him even when you forcefully turned him around and tore the hood part of the cape off his head.

Then, the world tilted around its axis and you froze under the watch of that familiar face.

“Sunwoo?” You asked shakily, confused, but the boy stared back at you with disdain and it was a strike constant to his playful smile he had said goodbye with a few hours prior.

It was Sunwoo but at the same time it wasn’t: he looked exactly the same as the last time you saw him except his eyes. They were coal black and emotionless. They were scaring you. Just like the darkness of the energy swirling inside him.

"What happened to you?" You asked in a shaky voice, not sure if he could hear or understand you because he stared so emptily as if he was nothing but a shell. "Sunwoo…"

You tried gentler but to no avail, the guy's eyes turned sharper the moment he heard approaching steps and the next moment you flinched away because of the burning feeling running up your arm. Only when you stumbled farther did the pain subside and looking down at your overcoat, you saw the burnt mark of a hand over your upper arm.

In disbelief, you stared at the wound and took a tentative step backwards when Sunwoo, this possessed Sunwoo, came closer. You pointed your sword at him.

"Don't come near me," you warmed him, the 'or else' clear in your tone, yet the real reason for your warning was that you didn't want to hurt him but if he didn't stop, you would have to. "Sunwoo, please…"

The swish of an arrow was the first thing you saw next, then Sunwoo, grabbing onto his arm in pain and while you searched for the attacker he ran away, more arrows flying after him.

"Stop!" You yelled at the stranger over the walls, angry and desperate, not knowing what to do to bring back the boy, the Sunwoo you knew. The guy with the bow jumped off next to you and the red strands of his hair made you wonder whether you were hallucinating.

"Sunwoo?" You asked, unsure, the witchcraft making you doubtful.

"It's me," the boy said, quiet and warm, just the way you knew him.

"Sunwoo," you called his name in relief and hugged him close, closing your eyes as you let his body’s warmth embrace you. It was like a soothing balm unlike the cold roughness the other emitted. The world was finally alright again. "What happened? Do you know who he was or…"

You couldn't even finish the sentence. You were roughly yanked away from Sunwoo who was held down by two officers, ties and eye cover on him like criminals. Songrim's leader and his men were all around you as well as students from Jeongjinrak who pointed their fingers at the kneeling boy accusatory. They had all seen him flee apparently. They had seen him attack soldiers. They had seen him create fire on the top of his palm. It was his doing, they claimed and if you hadn't seen the real one, you might have believed them.

You elbowed your way through the crowd and grabbed your uncle's arm, tugging.

“I know it sounds crazy but it wasn’t him. It looks exactly like him but it’s not him!” You protested but this time Park Danggu didn't seem convinced. "Please. You have to believe me!"

“Sorry. It will be the safest if we lock him up,” the man said firmly, with an apologetic sigh, and signaled his guards to capture the boy.

"It's alright," Sunwoo reassured you when he passed by you before you could have made a scene over the injustice. It was not alright but you knew that he meant well. If you were confined too for disobedience then who would have proved the truth?

You watched him being taken away and wondered if you took any missteps, if you were accused of using your priestess powers they couldn't understand to evil deeds, would they have turned against you so quickly too? Or would you have been privileged because of your parents? Sunwoo had nobody, so if you didn't help him, he would have been all alone in this. The thought clenched your heart uncomfortably.

But of course, being one of the spectators, Jaehyun couldn't shut up, not even when it was about things he didn't know, so unaware of your internal turmoil, he just had to brag to his friends that he had told them so, that he was right about Sunwoo all along.

“Good, that freak is finally at his deserved place,” he snickered purposefully loud enough for you to hear and you didn’t know what got into you but in that moment you saw red and didn’t even think. You stormed up to Jaehyun and punched him. Hard. It might have earned you suspension and red knuckles but at least it felt good.

Proving Sunwoo's innocence wasn't an easy feat. First of all, because only Changmin and Haknyeon dared to openly take your side and believe your story. Second of all, because there had been weeks between the two fire incidents you knew of and you couldn't just wait for another to happen, so it would prove that Sunwoo couldn't do something like that from captivity.

With the library half burnt down, it was hard to look for options in written history too and you wouldn't have known if Sunwoo had an evil twin because the prophecy would have surely pointed that out. Soul shifting was also not an option because you literally saw the two of them together, looking alike and all that. You were so out of options that you were about to visit a shaman and ask if they knew about black magic that could cause something like this but then your parents arrived home.

Clearly they had heard of what you had gotten yourself into from your uncle and didn't like it one bit. So of course, you got your fair share of scolding but it wasn't like they had been any better at your age and they knew.

"So you repeatedly sneaked out of Jeongjinrak after curfew to what… practice with that boy?"

"His name is Sunwoo."

Your father rolled his eyes as if he couldn't care less.

"At least you should have sneaked out for something more… important," he crossed his arms and it was funny, really, because your parents had always taught you to be honest and only follow rules that made sense. They probably knew you would hear enough stories about them being rebels from Park Jin and Lady Kim at least.

"Like when you sneaked out to meet mother?" You crossed your arms too and Jang Uk narrowed his eyes at you.

"Are you sure you only practiced sword fighting and archery?" He raised a brow and the implication only made sense to you a few seconds later.

"Oh my lord, yes! Not everybody is like you and mother! We have nothing like that going on. He's my friend," you clarified, louder and more defensive than intended. You tried not to think of the way Sunwoo’s hug had made you feel.

"Well, we were never quite friends, that's for sure," your mother piped in, amused, and took your father's hand before looking back at you, more serious this time. "Danggu told us you're convinced it wasn't the boy's doing despite multiple people giving his descriptions to the investigators. He said you were also with him both times the fires happened and he was found."

"Yes and that's why I'm sure it wasn't him," you quickly jumped on the chance to explain, grateful that your parents were willing to listen. At least it looked like it. "The second time I chased down the hooded figure running off the scene and when I caught up with him, I also thought it was Sunwoo. He looked just like him but his eyes and expressions… It was like a lifeless ghost's. It wasn't like him. And his energy felt different too, unnatural."

Your parents exchanged a knowing glance. Their secret little thing which used to annoy you because sometimes they communicated with only looks over the dinner table but in a way, you thought it was sweet, that they knew each other so well, like their souls were so intertwined.

"You know that something escaped from Jinyowon, right?" Your mother asked once they seemed to decide with your father to tell you that and you gave a short nod. It would have been a useless lie to deny that and you knew that they wouldn't have held the truth over your head, not as much as a lie. "Have you ever heard about the nail-eating mouse?"

"No, but I don't understand how it connects to Sunwoo's case," you admitted a bit confused. A mouse didn't sound too scary.

"This mouse eats nail clippings at night and literally turns into the person whose nails they were," they explained and oh, now that made sense.

"How long can it stay as that person?" You asked tentatively and you could tell that your mother was careful with her words as she answered.

"Usually a few days for each nail. Unless their victim dies while they are in their form, then forever."

You could feel your throat tighten at the possibility and there was this urge to go to wherever Sunwoo was kept and make sure he was well-guarded before anything like that could happen. But of course, your parents told you this on purpose and they didn't want you to go on a secret mission alone.

"It is our case, leave it to us. We will find the doppelganger and clear your friend's name, don't worry," they reassured you and you nodded, thankful but not quite convinced.

No matter how much you trusted your parents and their skills, you couldn't just sit still. You were their daughter after all and it wasn't in your blood.

You told Changmin and Hakyeon what you knew and you tried to figure out what was common about the fires so far. You didn't know anything about the noble whose house was the first incident while in the school there could be many targets. Not in the library though. In both cases the chaos and anger following was bigger than the number of casualties, so maybe that was one of the goals: attention.

"And let's not forget that both happened when Sunwoo was nearby. It's kind of smart if this copycat wants him to take the blame," Changmin added and you had to agree. Even though you were there both times too, it was unlikely that it was about you. After all, by now you were convinced that your supposed-to-be first encounter with Sunwoo, the one at the market where you felt something off about him, wasn't Sunwoo at all either and no fire broke out that day.

“Wait. Where is Sunwoo kept?” you asked frantically because if the doppelganger indeed attacked places near Sunwoo, it would make it easier to locate them.

Hakyeon, whose father worked at Songrim, seemed confused though.

“As far as I know in the palace’s holding cells, why?”

Sure, they must have thought that with so many guards around, he wouldn't cause further troubles and maybe that also meant he was safe but not if something burnt down and he was blamed. Nobody knew the extent of his skills with fire after all, not even him. And if the monster wanted attention…

“The Moon Festival!” You stood up at the realization because suddenly it was all too clear. If you were in their shoes, you would have surely let others do the dirty work. What better way to do it than causing havoc during one of the biggest events of the royal court? To save face, the king would have had to set an example. If they couldn't stop the fire otherwise, they would have to kill Sunwoo in hopes to stop it for sure.

But it wasn't enough that you were convinced. Your parents thought that the idea was too far-stretched. All this trouble to get Sunwoo's body? But it made sense to you and you couldn't help but wonder whether that prophecy was about this too. Not actually Sunwoo, but the monster wearing his face and stealing his powers.

Your parents also thought that the monster wouldn't have dared to attack the palace because it was too well-guarded, so they kept on with their usual 'searching for negative energy concentration over town' but that didn't work that effective so far, did it? So you had no choice, really. The festival was happening in two days and you had to plan how to sneak away from the celebration itself to the holding cells to warn Sunwoo. You knew only one person who could help you with that…

"No," the Crown Prince shook his head. "I told you not to trust him and now you want me to help you visit him in prison? No way."

You crossed your arms in front of your chest and glared at Youngjae.

"I will come and keep you company whenever you want for a month," you offered in exchange and you saw the surprised glint in the prince's eyes.

"Three months. If my father discovered us, I would be grounded for a month at least," he rebutted and even though you gritted your teeth, you could see the logic in his way of thinking.

"Two months because we won't get caught," you negotiated, your final offer before you tried to sneak in without his help. Youngjae might have been reluctant, but he wouldn't have let you do something like that on your own. Also, he was starving for some company these days, so you could pretty much predict him giving in.

"Alright, fine. But you have to promise not to help him escape once you are there!"

You made no such promises but not because you wanted to cause an even bigger trouble. Helping Sunwoo run away when he was a captured criminal wouldn't have helped his case, if anything it would have made him even more suspicious. So you really just wanted to warn him and give him a dagger he could have protected himself with since he didn't have his sword with him. However, you also didn't expect the Moon Festival to be so grandiose this year and the monster not being subtle either. Setting the table of offerings on fire in front of the entire royal court and the biggest noble families of Daeho? Crazy. But if he wanted attention he surely received enough. Other than angering the deities and the elders, doing such a thing wouldn't have affected anything else after all. It was a question of pride at this point. Or proving a point. He must have had a lot of fun playing this cat and mouse chase with them, not getting caught either times.

"We need to get to Sunwoo. Now," you said urgently as you saw Songrim's people scattering around probably to find the culprit because when they didn't, they would have surely ended up at Sunwoo's holding cell to question him.

"Hey," Youngjae grabbed your arm and turned you towards him, more serious than you had ever seen him. "Are you sure that it's not his doing?"

You scoffed as you shrugged his hand off you.

"Have you ever seen anybody who could do something like this while not being present? He may have unusual powers but not like this," you claimed, sure in your words, and the prince sighed sheepishly. He tilted his head towards the narrow street between two buildings and led you away from the crowd. You and Changmin followed him while Hakyeon stayed to keep an eye on the happenings. The holding cells were away from the center of the palace and you had to hurry. You were a bit out of breath by the time you made it to the sturdy building.

"I will call the guards away, then you will have a chance to sneak in. Your boy should be among the newest prisoners, so close to the entrance, right side," Youngjae turned to you one corner from the cells and you nodded, grateful, but when he moved to go closer, Changmin held him back.

"There are no guards," he said warily. You furrowed your eyebrows and peek out from your hiding spot to check. He was right. There were no guards in front of the holding cells. Instead there were unmistakable burnt marks, charred ground and wood.

You didn't hesitate. You ran inside the building only to find the bodies of the guards on the floor and your throat closed. What if you were late? What if the monster got here faster? Or worse, what if it was indeed Sunwoo's doing? What if you didn’t know him as well as you believed?

With your heart beating rapidly, you approached the right-hand side cells. Prisoners were either passively sleeping or cursing at you, seemingly unaware of what happened by the entrance. But when you reached a few cells down, you saw the metal lock melted to the ground, the door open, the insides empty and you felt your heart drop.

You cursed under your breath unlady-like and ran back out, following the lingering Firebird energy around you. Your mother said you only needed to concentrate to be able to distinguish such things so clearly, but you never really had the patience to do so. You always felt like you were more of your father's daughter, liking the feel of a sword in your hand and the spirit of fighting. Your Jin priestess skills didn't come that naturally. But then you remembered that day when you and Sunwoo were practicing archery and he taught you how to concentrate on nothing but the target. You closed your eyes, remembering his words, his touch. You forced yourself to relax, to calm down your heart, to forget about everything else. When you opened your eyes you felt a rush of power surge through you as you had never been more certain where to go.

"They are heading towards the western gates," you said and nobody doubted your words. This time it was you who led the way but you weren't sure what you would find when you got there. If you even caught up with Sunwoo in time. Would you help him or would you have to stop him?

You had no idea but you sure did not expect Jaehyun actually being helpful for once by holding them back. Even if unbeknownst to him.

Later you were told, he picked a petty fight with Sunwoo, or whom he thought to be Sunwoo, when he passed by him in the gardens, only to be confused when the actual Sunwoo showed up, chasing after the first. He then joked, asking which twin was the nicer one, and almost got himself sliced in half when the doppelganger attacked him. If Sunwoo was half as good of a swordsman as he was, Jaehyun would have been dead. Instead he was just shocked and enraged by the time you got there, watching as the two Sunwoos fought.

It was a sight indeed, two identical guys with burning swords at each other's throat. If it was anybody else, they wouldn't have known who was the real one and who was the doppelganger but you could feel it in the way energy surrounded them. The Firebird's energy surrounded them both, heat and destruction in their aura but only one of them felt like a deep abyss.

Sunwoo fell at one point, obviously injured and you wondered whether he had been chasing the monster since that thing had tried to make it look like he forced his way out of prison, leaving but behind.

"Sunwoo, down! Quickly!" you yelled at him, gathering enough water energy in the air to form a droplet of water before slicing it through with your sword sending a blow of multiplied energy towards the doppelganger. When your mother had told you that she had also taught your father to do this and it had helped him beat the now king, you didn't think that you would use the ability of Tansu for anything more than showing off. But your mother taught you well and the monster definitely seemed surprised.

When it sent a ball of fire towards you in exchange, you raised your arms protectively in front of you to lift a layer of blue glow. The fire didn't reach it though because Sunwoo stepped in its way, angry fire hitting his shoulder, sending him to the ground.

You cried out his name, lowering the protective layer as you ran to him, to check on his wound but the burn under his now holey shirt faded into nothing within seconds. A relieved sigh left you as you helped him stand and pride swelled your chest as you saw all your friends – and even not friends like Jaehyun – attacking the creature of the night. When you and the real Sunwoo joined them, the monster probably realized that his chances were low because the next moment he disappeared. Not really, but he turned back into a small white mouse, disappearing quickly between the cracks of the buildings. The Queen's favorite garden looked like a mess though. Now, how would you have explained that to the King? Would he believe you if you told the truth about the doppelganger, even without captured evidence? Would…

"I thought we told you to leave it to us," your father's firm voice yanked you out of your worried thoughts and your eyes widened when you saw your parents carry an enchanted bird cage with a white mouse in it.

"Sorry," you mumbled more out of instinct than sincerity. You would have done it again, without a second thought. You were their daughter after all, but you were sorry that you got them worried.

"Are you alright?" Your mother asked, touching your face where you felt a bruise forming. You grimaced at the slight pain you were suddenly reminded of but nodded.

Probably due to the sound of the commotion people kept showing up, soldiers and mages alike, the fire was still going on at the festival's altar and you all were requested to help contain it. It wasn't easy but with enough mages and Sunwoo's ability to somewhat control the fire's way, you eventually managed to save the palace from burning down.

While you were helping with the injured, you could see your father pat Sunwoo on the shoulder, probably complimenting him but you could also see his gaze harden and his grip squeezing a bit tighter than comfortable but the boy didn't flinch. He bowed respectfully and waited until your father started talking with Songrim's leader before making his way towards you.

His smile was sheepish and you wondered whether he got the typical protective father talk. You wouldn't have been surprised. Changmin had gotten it as well when you first befriended him and you both laughed goodheartedly at it. You weren't laughing now.

"Thank you," Sunwoo stopped in front of you, looking earnest. You shook your head.

"Don't mention it. The others helped too," you vaguely waved your hand towards the guys from Jeongjinrak and Prince Youngjae.

"No, but really," Sunwoo insisted and oh, he was serious. The intensity in his eyes made you gulp. "When you mentioned the prophecy that one time I thought you believed that it's written in stone and that at the first potential sign of it turning true, you would be against me. So… thank you for believing in me."

His words hit a cord in your heart. It seemed that while you were afraid that he would betray your trust, he was afraid that you would stop trusting him.

"Sometimes prophecies shouldn't be interpreted word by word," you shrugged as if it was nothing even though you did feel a bit guilty for having second thoughts about him. You stopped feeling like the possibility that it would turn true was hovering over you like the sword of Damocles but that day you wavered and you didn't like it one bit. You wanted to be the maker of your own destiny.

"Good," Sunwoo nodded as he let out a deep breath, his shoulders relaxing. Then he pointed in the direction of the main palace. "Do you think there are any mooncakes left intact at any of the stalls?"

Your parents took care of the monster and indeed helped clear Sunwoo's name. Every case of destructive fire could have been traced back to his doppelganger who probably felt the boy's raw, special energy and wanted it for himself.

As it turned out one of your cousins was the one who accidentally opened Jinyowon's cave but was too afraid to tell anybody about it. He didn't see the mouse sneak out, otherwise he would have admitted his mistake sooner. Park Danggu apologized personally to Sunwoo that his son had caused such troubles for him and that he was wrongfully accused.

On the other hand, Jaehyun did not apologize but wasn't as insufferable as before. He definitely didn't try to pick on Sunwoo or you just for the sake of feeling superior or something. He and his friend let Sunwoo be, which made Jeongjinrak's training a lot less stressful and more useful. Duels were more for motivation and actual practice than power plays.

Another good thing that came out of the whole ordeal was that Sunwoo and you could finally practice his fire skills against your water ones in broad daylight because Master Seo believed it was the perfect opportunity to examine the broadness and variety of a different kind of mage's repertoire.

Ever since then you often had sparring battles with the boy after class, making bets with 'the loser pays for the honey biscuits' kind of punishments. Once Youngjae came by and joked why it wasn't 'the loser gives the other a kiss' and you chased him down until he took it back.

"Last one to give up gets to make a wish?" Sunwoo suggested this time and you liked the sound of it. You were already thinking of what you could have asked of him when he would finally give up.

“Bring it on,” you smiled at the redhead challengingly and unsheathed your sword, getting ready for yet another sparring that felt like dancing with danger.

Would you regret it? Would he betray you one day and use the skills you taught him against you? Would you? Would the two of you turn the prophecy into reality eventually?

Maybe but you wouldn't let maybes poison your present. For now, he was just a boy and you were just a girl and your skin burned when he came too close. Swords pulled out, breathing heavy, when he smiled, your chest tightened and it felt like your heart was on fire. It consumed you slowly and sweetly and you burned willingly.

("So what's your wish?" You asked, panting, as you laid down on the ground in the middle of the field, looking up at the sky. Next to you, Sunwoo did the same.

You, his heart thump, thump, thrumped and you could feel your own jump as he slowly laced your fingers together. His hand was rough but warm.

"This. Just this," he whispered and you squeezed his hand with a smile.

The stars never looked prettier.)

#the boyz x reader #sunwoo x reader #tbz x reader #the boyz scenarios #sunwoo imagines #stories

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besttropeveershowdown · 1 month

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The Worst Trope Ever Showdown: Round 2, Side B

Humanoid Female Animal

Mainly a thing in animation (tho comes up in CGI in otherwise live action movies or w/e). the male of an animal species will range from somewhat anthropomorphic to looking pretty much like a normal animal, but the female of (supposedly) the same species will be extremely anthropomorphised & sexualised. often includes long hair on the head, heavy makeup, and boobs where the animals they are supposed to represent usually have none of those, and the males usually don't have any either

Propaganda:

ugh. UGH. can a female not exist without being a sexy sex doll? can a female not be hairy and animalistic like the male counterparts? can a female not have ANY interesting design features/ any design at all except 'sexy'??? CAN A FEMALE ANIMAL LOOK LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL PLEASE. IF YOU'RE GRANTING THE MALES THAT GRACE WHY NOT EXTEND IT TO THE FEMALES JFC. IS THE ONLY PURPOSE OF A FEMALE CHARACTER OF ANY KIND TO BE SEXY TO THE AUDIENCE??? IS IT????? (also they just always look terrible like c'mon that thing is meant to be attractive somehow? to be visually pleasing to you somehow?? (sorry)

gotta slap a bow and eyelashes on to Girl character design bc god forbid we can't tell the boy and girl bunny/lion/deer apart!!!

Aside from the obvious sleazy aspect, it is also, in my opinion as a working character designer, deeply uninspired and often a symptom of a lack of real consideration going into the designs and/or world-building.

Always Chaotic Evil

A whole race/culture within the setting who are just evil for the sake of being evil.

Propaganda:

Racist as fuck!

From a narrative standpoint, it does limit storytelling and opportunities for character development. On another level, it’s riddled with dodgy implications when played straight (ie certain cultures/races/ethnicities are purely and inherently evil with maybe one or two exceptions and anything the “good races” do to them is justified or just doesn’t matter). Given how frequently speculative fiction (you know, Sci Fi, Fantasy and Horror) is used to mirror or comment on the real world, this gets a lot uglier and more horrifying for too many reasons to go into here. Look, when Dungeons and Dragons are moving away from this sort of thing and even JRR Tolkien (the father of modern fantasy) thought that trope was distasteful and regretted not showing more sympathetic aspects/members of the orcs in the text, it’s safe to say that this is a bad trope.

making an entire fantasy race all pure evil w zero nuance is just...hmmm

#the worst trope ever showdown #wtes polls #anti tropeaganda #humanoid female animal #always chaotic evil #tw racism

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queen-paladin · 26 days

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March 2024 Reading Wrap Up!

Hiya guys, since I have been on a book reading craze lately (I want to read 30 books before I turn 30 and am now on 13 in March, which says something). I enjoy Goodreads, but little to no people read my reviews. My most popular one on Goodreads has *drumroll* six likes *confetti*. And I have a lot of feelings and thoughts and nowhere to express them...so why not here!

That being said...Books I have read in March of 2024! Better late then never!

What I read and my own personal, take it with a grain of salt thoughts on them below:

Caraval by Stephanie Garber

(YA Fantasy)

Summary:

Scarlett Dragna has never left the tiny island where she and her sister, Tella, live with their powerful, and cruel, father. Now Scarlett’s father has arranged a marriage for her, and Scarlett thinks her dreams of seeing Caraval—the faraway, once-a-year performance where the audience participates in the show—are over. But this year, Scarlett’s long-dreamt-of invitation finally arrives. With the help of a mysterious sailor, Tella whisks Scarlett away to the show. Only, as soon as they arrive, Tella is kidnapped by Caraval’s mastermind organizer, Legend. It turns out that this season’s Caraval revolves around Tella, and whoever finds her first is the winner.

I am usually not the type to stay up late reading because I have to know what's going to happen. I usually set the book down and tuck in bedtime.

This book was an exception.

I was on the edge of my seat, forgetting the time and hour, wanting to read just one more page because I had to know what would happen. The pacing was just right, the world was beautiful and dangerous, and I enjoyed the characters. Scarlett was a breath of fresh air in a genre notorious for internal misogyny in it's female protagonists. Timid and Proper and Responsible, but grows on her own and learns to take initiative.

The environment was very reminiscent of the Night Circus, imagine like, if the Night Circus was a town built on illusions, and you have Caraval. But the Night Circus, rereading it as an adult, had an insufferable MMC who has a girlfriend who sacrifices so much for him, then the MMC who cheats on his girlfriend for the FMC, and then when the girlfriend has the truth confirmed to her, she gets upset and briefly lashes out, the writing then frames her as An Evil Woman Scorned for doing so (which is...yikes) Justice for Isobel Martin. She should have done a full Carrie White style Everyone Dies rampage and I would have rooted her on the whole time.

There's none of that crap here! We have a lovely romance between Scarlett and Julian full of all sorts of wonderful, chemistry-building moments.

But what got me was the story- the various twists and turns kept me on the edge of my seat, gasping and clinging. I was captivated. Entranced by it's spell. This is a roller coaster of a book, so just hold on and enjoy the ride. I am so glad I read this book, it gave me a feeling and experience I hadn't had with a book in ages, one where I had to stay up late, because I had to read what would happen next.

5/5

The Unlovely Bride by Alice Coldbreath

(Romance, Historic, Fantasy)

Summary: Lenora Montmayne leads a charmed life as the most beautiful woman at King Wymer’s court, surrounded by admirers. And then disaster strikes. The red pox sweeps the summer palace at Caer-Lyones and Lenora’s fair face falls victim to its ravages. Without her looks, what does Lenora have left to her?

If ever there was a knight the crowd loves to hate, it’s Garman Orde. Even his own family despises him. Then one night a heavily veiled lady offers him an extraordinary bargain. And he finds out that Lenora Montmayne was never just a pretty face.

Review: Any marriage of convenience story I will read, and I will devour it. I've been looking forward to this book for a while, and I do love the premise. And most of all, I love the setting! This lovely world that is part medieval England part not because fuck it, it's not history, just the vibes. And I LOVE our female protagonist. Leonora relied on her looks and nothing else for years to get by, and now that they are gone, she relies on her own person. She loves kitty cats, she believes in prophecies and fortune-telling but is smart, pragmatic, and determined. She and Garman have a nice romance with some great lines and moments (and some nice spice). My complaint is that while the first half is amazing, the second half kind of drags, and not much happens, it could have used more tension, more stakes, and more plot. I may read another Coldbreath book sometime, just because I love the world of Karadok, but I'm not sure.

3.75/5

Medea by Eilish Quin

(Historic, Fantasy)

Summary: The daughter of a sea nymph and the granddaughter of a Titan, Medea is a paradox. She is at once rendered compelling by virtue of the divinity that flows through her bloodline and made powerless by the fact of her being a woman. As a child, she intuitively submerges herself in witchcraft and sorcery, but soon finds it may not be a match for the prophecies that hang over her entire family like a shroud.

As Medea comes into her own as a woman and a witch, she also faces the arrival of the hero Jason, preordained by the gods to be not only her husband, but also her lifeline to escape her isolated existence. Medea travels the treacherous seas with the Argonauts, battles demons she had never conceived of, and falls in love with the man who may ultimately be her downfall.

Review: Ok, ok, I have so many feelings about this. I was...sadly disappointed by this book. Medea is probably my personal favorite of the Ancient Greek Women, if not, my favorite of the spicier, more controversial, morally grey ones (Hera, Circe, Medusa, Clytemnestra, etc)

But, my biggest issue with this book, and it's big, is that I don't believe there is a love story between Medea and Jason. The writer makes him unlikable from the get-go, to where he has numerous Kick The Dog (tm) moments like physically abusing Medea and killing one of Pelleas's daughters when she won't stop crying. Medea herself doesn't justify them, and she keeps thinking of "eh, he's sometimes kind of good-looking, but he's okay."

Like, Medea in this book, after meeting Jason, she flat out tells her brother that he is the man she loves the most in her life (which...YIKES for the implications. But in order for any Medea story to work, I HAVE to believe she is madly, desperately in love with Jason. There's no oath where Jason swears before the gods to stay with her, so then there's no hurt. She kind of has to marry Jason to preserve her honor according to Aunt Circe, but not out of love. Since there's no romantic chemistry, the sacrifices Medea takes make more sense and the betrayal hurts even more so then when she does what she does in Corinth, she is extremely sympathetic at least in the beginning.

Like, she has a moment after Jason revealed he cheated on her and is leaving her for Glauce and she goes "oh, poor Glauce is a victim like me." Which begs the question for this version- why doesn't she just kill Jason himself? She calls Glauce a poor baby victim, she kills Glauce, not Jason. If she loved Jason that much, then she would hate him more, and killing Glauce would make more sense. She wants to watch Jason suffer.

Also, I feel like Eilsha Quinn is a bit afraid of the moral nuances of Medea. She has her "I didn't really MEAN to!" moments and there is one character she kills who she then re-animates (like she re-animates her brother, so oopsie Daisy, she's actually not a kinslayer! And he just...vibes with them as the third wheel lives with them, and helps look after the kids. This makes it less tragic because A) She's not a murderer who risked and left everything for him, she's more "perfect" and not as flawed, and B) when Jason betrays her, she's less alone and has an immediate support system there in her brother). And the kid- killing she does to trick Jason and then she re-animates them later, or tries, to but no, that failed and they're dead dead, whoops. Even if Medea purposely killing the kids was the invention of Euripides, I want to believe Medea is capable of purposely, intentionally doing some violent, controversial things and this seems to be afraid of her spice, her teeth.

The writing is pretty, and I liked the beginning with learning about her childhood, but this was a letdown.

I did order Hewlitt's book of Medea, which is higher ranked on Goodreads so my hope is higher for that one.

3/5

Divine Rivals by Rebecca Ross

(YA, Fantasy, Romance)

Summary:

After centuries of sleep, the gods are warring again. But eighteen-year-old Iris Winnow just wants to hold her family together. Her mother is suffering from addiction and her brother is missing from the front lines. Her best bet is to win the columnist promotion at the Oath Gazette.

To combat her worries, Iris writes letters to her brother and slips them beneath her wardrobe door, where they vanish—into the hands of Roman Kitt, her cold and handsome rival at the paper. When he anonymously writes Iris back, the two of them forge a connection that will follow Iris all the way to the front lines of battle: for her brother, the fate of mankind, and love.

Review: This book was utterly beautiful, breathtaking, and heartbreaking all at once and yet uplifting and then it breaks your heart again. The world is simple and lovely. It's a mix of World War One/two aesthetics with a fantasy setting. It's basically You Got Mail but fantasy and more focus on the drama then the comedy.

The romance is lovely, there is such a beautiful love story between Roman and Iris as they sort out their feelings, reveal their secrets, doubts, failures, grief, and insecurities, and learn more about where they fall for each other. Plus, the twists and turns were a lot of fun and the pacing was just right.

I have no faults or complaints, this was just a lovely, lovely book and I look forward to the sequel because THAT was quite a note to end on!

5/5

Legendborn by Tracy Deonn

Summary: After her mother dies in an accident, sixteen-year-old Bree Matthews wants nothing to do with her family memories or childhood home. A residential program for bright high schoolers at UNC–Chapel Hill seems like the perfect escape—until Bree witnesses a magical attack her very first night on campus.

A flying demon feeding on human energies.

A secret society of so called “Legendborn” students that hunt the creatures down.

And a mysterious teenage mage who calls himself a “Merlin” and who attempts—and fails—to wipe Bree’s memory of everything she saw.

The mage’s failure unlocks Bree’s own unique magic and a buried memory with a hidden connection: the night her mother died, another Merlin was at the hospital. Now that Bree knows there’s more to her mother’s death than what’s on the police report, she’ll do whatever it takes to find out the truth, even if that means infiltrating the Legendborn as one of their initiates.

She recruits Nick, a self-exiled Legendborn with his own grudge against the group, and their reluctant partnership pulls them deeper into the society’s secrets—and closer to each other. But when the Legendborn reveal themselves as the descendants of King Arthur’s knights and explain that a magical war is coming, Bree has to decide how far she’ll go for the truth and whether she should use her magic to take the society down—or join the fight.

Reveiw: This is such a hyped, beloved, popular book that is so many people's baby and favorite series and it...it was okay.

It wasn't bad.

But I didn't find it phenomenal, amazing, spectacular, life chagning.

It was good. It was okay.

I honestly got extremely tired of trying to learn how the over-complicated Arthurian society worked. It's explained in a super info-dumpy way that the characters get, but I don't. And the pacing was way too slow, I feel like it needed to shave off a good hundred pages, or fifty, perhaps.

I do enjoy the main girl, Bree, alright. She doesn't take bullshit, but has moments of vulnerability. As well as exploring race, grief, family history and the scenes with root magic were amazing. The beginning was fantastically done, it was the middle part where it peterred off for me.

But the rest of it, not gonna lie, was kind of...eh.

And, ngl, I am more Team Nick. Sel is a giant jerk who treats her like garbage, yet people root for them and want them to be together, and I'm like....??????? why? At least Nick, white saviory as he can be, is trying and cares for her and affirms and appreciates her strength.

I respect that this is so many people's favorite book and that it speaks to them and moves them. But for me, if none of these people made any content around this book and said nothing, based off of my opinion independent of others, if you plopped this book on my lap and said nothing about the hype about it...I'd still say it was just okay. That might be my controversial hot take, but it's just what my personal experience was from this book.

3/5

Currently Reading: The Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Demon by Lemming, The Death of Jane Lawrence by Starling, Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Fairies by Fawcett, and Twisted Love by Ana Huang.

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hamsterclaw · 1 year

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Allez

Seokjin's the latest fencer to join your parents' studio. He's competitive, beautiful and challenges you in ways beyond the foil.

My contribution to the Catch of the Century collab.

Pairing: Seokjin x F! reader

Genre: Fencer Jin AU, smut, angst

Rating: 18+

Word count: 8.9k

Warnings: Explicit sex, sexual innuendo, swearing

You unlock the doors to your parents’ fencing studio and the familiar smell hits you. It’s a mix of musty and sweaty, permeating the very pores of the building even though you don’t think the building’s that old.

You switch the lights on and start pulling equipment out of the store room to set up for the day.

A noise from behind you startles you.

You turn to see a tall man standing awkwardly by the door.

‘Hi, I’m Kim Seokjin. I start today?’

The way his voice goes up at the end makes it sound like a question.

‘Nice to meet you,’ you reply politely. ‘I’m Y/N L/N, just setting up. My father said you were joining us today.’

Kim Seokjin is the latest trainee to join your father’s fencing school, and his reputation precedes him. He started fencing late, and he’s older than most of the trainees here, but he’s got a raw talent and work ethic that paid off when he ranked internationally last year.

‘My father won’t be in for another half hour. Would you like to look around? The gym’s open,’ you offer.

‘Do you want help?’ Seokjin says instead, gesturing to the cage of jackets and pants you’re about to wheel out into the main studio.

‘I’ll be fine, I do this every day,’ you reassure him.

He doesn’t seem to want to go, so you let him push the cage whilst you gather the collection of swords.

‘Are you training for the Asian games?’ you ask, as you hang jackets and pants up on the rail.

‘Yes,’ he says, almost like he’s embarrassed about it.

You look at him curiously as you push the cage back in and head to the gym.

You flick the lights on, watching for his reaction.

The gym in your parent’s studio is huge, designed like a fencer’s wet dream. Both your parents represented the country, in foil events. Your father was a three-time Olympian, your mother was once top ranked in the world.

You’d shown promise once, the only daughter of two fencing luminaries, and it’d broken your parents’ hearts when you’d given up aged 16 and prioritised running instead. You earned a track scholarship for university but haven’t competed since graduating.

Turns out, you don’t really have much competitive spirit in you.

Seokjin’s lips are moving, and you realise you’ve tuned him out completely.

‘Sorry,’ you say apologetically, ‘what did you say?’

He’s about to repeat it when your father appears at the entrance to the gym.

‘Kim Seokjin,’ he says, friendly, welcoming. ‘You’re early.’

‘I was just talking to Y/N,’ Seokjin says. His smile is pretty, warm, and makes you realise just how good-looking he is. You’ve seen pictures of him, of course, but most of the fencers in your parents’ school are tall, slim, athletic looking, physically blessed.

You take a step back and nearly bump into Jeon Jungkook, another one of your father’s trainees, and one of your best friends. You both watch as your father leads Seokjin away to his office.

‘What are you doing here so early Jungkook?’ you ask.

He smiles at you, casual. ‘I thought I’d fit in a workout before training today.’

‘Yeah, you need more muscles,’ you agree. Jungkook pouts at you.

You’ve known Jungkook since you trained together as teenagers, and it’s a running joke between you about how he hit twenty and then turned into a sexy, beautifully sculpted adult.

‘When are we going running together?’ he asks, slipping off his sweatshirt.

You grab the hem of his t-shirt to stop him from baring his abs as his t-shirt rides up. You know he already has a starring role in the fantasies of all the teenagers in your parents’ stable of trainees.

‘When you can keep up,’ you reply, rolling your eyes at his cheeky grin.

‘I can keep up,’ he says, waggling his brows, suggestive. ‘I’ve got stamina.’

‘You kiss your mother with that mouth, Jeon?’ you ask.

Jungkook just grins and heads to the treadmill to practice footwork. ‘See you after work.’

***

Jungkook meets you at the café near your work at the end of the day.

‘How’s the new guy?’ you ask, after you’ve ordered.

‘I like him,’ Jungkook says. His stomach rumbles loudly.

You reach in your bag and pass him a package of Pocky.

Jungkook tears it open like it’s his last meal.

You watch him crunch into the chocolate dipped sticks with a mixture of disbelief and disgust.

‘Did you want some?’ he asks.

You wave him off. ‘You look like you need it more than me.’

‘I’m going through a growth spurt,’ Jungkook says.

‘You’re spurting something, that’s for sure,’ you agree, smiling when the tips of his ears turn red.

‘So tell me about Seokjin.’

‘Why do you want to know?’ Jungkook asks. He smiles at the waitress who’s delivering your drinks and she nearly spills the water, she’s so busy looking at him.

‘Why won’t you tell me?’ you counter.

‘His footwork is insane,’ Jungkook finally says. ‘He looks like he’s floating. Also he judges distance like no one else.’

‘Nice,’ you say. ‘You think he’ll get on the national team?’

‘He might beat me to it,’ Jungkook says, but he doesn’t sound in the least worried.

Your lack of competitive spirits were what made you get on so well when you first met, two outliers in a cohort of fiercely competitive fencers.

Jungkook’s still doing it though, his physicality is incredible. You were the competitive runner, but you think he might beat you in a distance run. Without trying. With a snack in his mouth.

‘Hye-mi asked him out,’ Jungkook informs you, spearing a chip from your plate and stealing it before you can stop him.

‘Yeah?’ you ask.

‘He turned her down,’ Jungkook tells you. His eyes flick to yours. ‘Is that the info you wanted?’

Your whole face feels warm.

Jungkook laughs softly.

‘Do you have a crush, Y/N?’

‘Shut up, JK.’

***

The next morning, you’re wiping down gym equipment when Seokjin approaches you.

‘Do you mind if I use the treadmill?’ he asks.

You’re surprised to see him here so early again.

‘Of course, you don’t have to ask me,’ you say, smiling.

You’re cleaning, but you also can’t help watching as he practices his footwork.

Jungkook had been right. He’s quick, light on his feet, making it look almost effortless as he advances.

He turns suddenly, and you’re treated to the straight line of his spine where his thin t-shirt is stuck to his back. God, his back. He’s worked up a sweat already.

You’re working up a sweat just watching him.

You realise he’s looking at you in the mirrors, and you turn away abruptly.

You have more to clean in the gym but you don’t think it’s good form to be caught ogling Kim Seokjin, and so you head for the equipment store.

Your father calls you into his office as you pass.

‘Your mother wants to cook hotpot tonight,’ he tells you.

‘Ok, I’m free,’ you say, mouth-watering at the thought of your mother’s delicious broth.

‘I’m inviting Kim Seokjin,’ your father tells you.

‘Ah sure. Can I invite Jungkook? He loves hotpot.’

Your father laughs. ‘I’ll ask your mother to pick up extra beef.’

‘I can get dessert,’ you say. ‘Seven thirty?’

‘See you later,’ your father replies.

***

Jungkook’s sniffing at the cardboard box containing the cheesecake you picked up.

‘Stop that. We don’t all need Kookie germs,’ you tell him, stepping a little closer so that passersby don’t bump into him on the busy street you’re both navigating.

‘I’ll give you Kookie germs,’ Jungkook mutters. His arm tightens against his side as a large group of drunk looking men pass you, pulling you closer.

‘It’s barely 7,’ you say, outraged, staring at the men.

‘No time limit on fun,’ Jungkook replies. ‘Apart from when it’s you and then there’s never any fun.’

You laugh at his rudeness. ‘Want me to carry the cake?’

‘Yes, but I also want to be the one to give it to your mom,’ Jungkook huffs.

‘She already loves you,’ you say, rolling your eyes. ‘Oh, by the way, Kim Seokjin’s coming for dinner.’

‘I hope there’s enough beef,’ Jungkook says, worried.

You take the box off him. ‘I’ll hold the cake, you stand in front of me so no one bumps us.’

Jungkook frowns. ‘Why did we have to come here for cake?’

‘You know it’s the best cheesecake,’ you say. ‘Sometimes you have to put in the work to get the best.’

‘Really?’ Jungkook asks, smile cocky.

‘And that’s why we’re never sleeping together,’ you joke.

Jungkook laughs and whines at the same time. ‘I already offered to give you Kookie germs,’ he tells you.

‘Sperm is actually sterile,’ you inform him. ‘Come on, hurry up, we don’t want to be late.’

‘My sperm isn’t sterile. It’s full of little Kookies,’ Jungkook says.

You burst out laughing. ‘I’m glad we’re getting this out of our system before we have to behave in front of Kim Seokjin and my parents. I meant there’s no germs in sperm.’

‘Want to see for yourself?’ Jungkook offers, but he’s already hailing the bus, ushering you on.

The cake makes it to your parents’ in one piece, and you pass it quickly to Jungkook before reaching for your keys.

The door opens before you can get the keys in the lock, and Kim Seokjin’s standing there, looking at you and Jungkook.

‘Hi,’ you say, smiling brightly.

He smiles back. ‘Need a hand?’ he asks Jungkook. ‘I brought dessert too.’

In a moment both you and Jungkook are standing in front of the beautiful layer cake Seokjin’s brought.

‘Nobody likes a try-hard,’ Jungkook mutters.

You nudge him, hard.

‘It looks beautiful, Seokjin.’

Your mother greets Jungkook like he’s her long-lost son, ushering him away to help her in the kitchen, leaving you and Seokjin standing in a corner of the dining room.

‘I didn’t know you and Jungkook knew each other,’ Seokjin says.

‘We used to train together when I fenced,’ you tell him. ‘Before I gave up.’

Seokjin looks down at you, and you sense he has questions, everyone you tell usually does, but all that comes out is, ‘I like training with your father.’

‘I’m glad. He thinks highly of you,’ you tell him.

Something occurs to you. ‘If you want, I can come earlier in the mornings to open up so you can work out.’

‘Don’t you have another job?’ Seokjin asks.

At your curious look, he says, quickly, ‘Your father said you have another job, which is why you open up in the morning and he locks up at night.’

‘I do, but I don’t mind coming in a bit earlier. I’m up anyway,’ you say.

‘If you really don’t mind, I’d like to have an earlier start on Wednesdays,’ Seokjin tells you.

‘Done. I’ll come in earlier tomorrow,’ you tell him, smiling. ‘Does 6am suit you?’

‘That would be great,’ Seokjin says. ‘Thank you.’

Jungkook emerges from the kitchen. ‘Hotpot’s ready.’

You’ve barely filled your bowls when you see a gleam in your mother’s eye as she looks at Seokjin.

You know what’s coming next, so you intercede smoothly.

‘What do your parents do, Seokjin?’ you ask.

Your mother’s mouth snaps shut.

‘My mother was an accountant, my father is in the shipping business,’ Seokjin answers. You get the sense he’s as used to answering these questions as your parents are used to asking them.

‘Which school did you go to?’ Jungkook asks, just about managing to look serious despite his mouth full of beef brisket.

Seokjin shoots you and Jungkook the universal trapped look familiar to anyone who’s ever been interrogated by an Asian parent.

‘I went to school outside Seoul and then I did my business degree, which is when I got into fencing.’

‘Do you have a girlfriend?’ you ask, on your mother’s behalf.

‘Or a boyfriend?’ Jungkook asks.

Your father eyes you and Jungkook warily. ‘I’m sure Seokjin wants to enjoy his food instead of answering all these very personal questions,’ he says, pointedly.

‘Oh, I don’t mind,’ Seokjin says. ‘I’m single.’

He looks at you. ‘Are you single?’

‘I’m single,’ you say, and he smiles.

‘Good.’

You can feel your face heating up, and are thankfully saved by your mother’s tongue click of disapproval. ‘But you and Jungkook ---’

‘Yeah,’ Jungkook pipes up. ‘What about us, Y/N?’

Your father gets up. ‘I’m going to get more meat to put on the grill.’

You put your beef on Jungkook’s plate so he’ll shut up.

‘Jungkook’s had a lot of girlfriends, mama,’ you tattle.

Your mother’s eyes widen as she looks at Jungkook, whose eyes are equally wide but whose mouth is full of beef preventing him from saying anything.

Seokjin chuckles quietly to himself.

‘The broth is delicious,’ he tells your mother, taking pity on Jungkook.

You take advantage of their moment of distraction to steal your beef back from Jungkook’s plate.

***

On Wednesdays you go in early to open up the studio for Seokjin and finish your other job at midday so you can help out at the studio.

You’re passing through when Mira, another fencer who trained with you and Jungkook, grabs you.

‘Can you practice with me?’ she asks. ‘I need a challenge today. It’s you or Jungkook.’

‘What’s Jungkook doing?’ you ask.

‘He was cornered by his fan club,’ Mira says, rolling her eyes. ‘He stripped his top off in the gym and I haven’t seen him since, just heard the screaming.’

‘Ugh,’ you say. ‘Let me get dressed. I’ll be there in five.’

You have your own fencing gear still because you often step in to train the younger trainees, especially on Wednesdays, or if there’s a match and your parents are unavailable.

You get dressed and warm up with Mira.

‘Ready to get your ass kicked?’ you ask.

Mira laughs. ‘I miss your shit talk.’ She pulls on her face guard and clips her body cord on. ‘Try and catch me, Y/N.’

You used to fence with Mira all the time as trainees, although there are no weight classes, she’s roughly your size, the size you all were before Jungkook hulked out.

You get into first position and another trainee, Ji-lin, calls out the orders.

Mira’s fast, quicker than she was, and you haven’t fenced competitively in years. She scores three points in quick succession whilst you’re still finding your feet.

‘Where’s that ass-kicking?’ she taunts, and you smile despite yourself.

You’re not a competitive person in general, but you enjoy fencing.

It’s combat, but it’s also graceful, beautiful.

You’re so relaxed you almost feel like you’re water.

Mira’s quicker than you, but you’ve also always found her predictable. The only reason she gets away with it is because of her speed.

You parry and feint and land a beautiful jab to the centre of her chest, retreating almost before she realises she’s been hit.

The next three points are yours, and you’re not worried because you know you’ve got this.

You fight hard for the next few points, and land another on her shoulder as she tries to retreat.

You’re 14-14.

Dimly, you realise you have an audience of more than Ji-lin.

‘Ready for your ass-kicking?’ you ask Mira.

She laughs, slightly muffled through her face guard, but you can hear her loud and clear. ‘Bring it.’

You haven’t done this in years, but muscle memory alone helps you remember.

You hear Ji-lin call out, and then you’re up, advancing towards Mira. You see the tell-tale movement of her foot and know exactly what she’s up to. As soon as she lunges, you dance back and tap her on the shoulder.

The buzzer sounds, and your green light comes on.

You greet each other from the ends of the piste and are about to pull your helmet off when another fencer approaches.

The fencer’s tall, much taller than you, which puts you at a disadvantage, but you’re so high off of your victory over Mira you don’t mind.

You nod and get into position.

Mira pulls off her face mask, giving you a thumbs up as the other fencer attaches the body cord to their foil jacket and their weapon.

She nods to you. ‘Ok to go ahead with another match?’

You nod. You’re not tired in the least, and your adrenaline’s still running high.

‘En garde, pret, allez,’ calls Mira.

You watch the other fencer as they advance towards you, hoping to catch a clue.

There’s a familiarity to their footwork. You’ve seen it watching them on TV, and, with a jolt, you realise you saw it more recently than that, in the gym.

You try to parry, but the tip of the blade’s already touched your foil jacket.

You can’t see Kim Seokjin’s face, but you know it’s him.

He scores three more points in quick succession, taking them from you before you get your head in the match.

You wonder, idly, if Seokjin knows it’s you.

You think that you should probably think about that another time before you get your ass beat.

You score two points purely because he wasn’t expecting you to come at him.

You switch styles, a trick your mother taught you, useful for confusing anyone who’s watched you and thinks they know your fencing.

Knowing your distance has always been your strength, you can be as aggressive or defensive as you like and still score when it counts.

You score another two points, but you can already tell you’re not going to win. He’s stronger, faster, and he seems to be keeping up with you perfectly well.

Your ankles clash as you lunge carelessly at him, and your momentum sends you tumbling sideways.

He reaches out quickly to grab you, lowering you to the ground gently.

He pulls off his face guard, and you’re greeted by his stunning face, flushed and sweaty.

He doesn’t seem surprised when you take your own face guard off. So he had known.

‘How’s your ankle?’ he asks, worried. ‘We clashed pretty hard.’

‘It’s ok,’ you reply, rubbing it gingerly. ‘I’ll just put some ice on it.’

He unclips himself, and you, and lifts you in his arms before you get a chance to protest.

‘What are you doing?’ you squeak, torn between embarrassment at being handled like a child and the sudden urge to bury your face in his broad chest.

‘I’ll take you to the medical room,’ Seokjin says.

‘I can walk,’ you say, dryly.

‘What if I wanted to impress you with how strong I am?’

Your face is burning, your heart beating so fast you think you’re going to pass out.

‘I know you’re strong. We were fencing,’ you say, faintly.

‘I’m bigger than you. I shouldn’t have gone so hard,’ Seokjin says, sounding more like he’s rebuking himself.

‘There are no weight classes in fencing,’ you reply.

His only answer is to shift you in his arms, pulling you in closer to his chest.

At this angle, it would be more awkward to pull away, so you let your head rest on his chest.

Seokjin deposits you on the couch in the medical room and opens the fridge for an ice pack.

You start undoing the laces on your shoes.

‘Just lean back,’ Seokjin chides. He pulls your shoe and sock off gently, and hands you the ice pack.

You try not to think about the fact that like this, your foot is propped between his thighs.

His thighs in tight fencing pants.

Shit, don’t think about what else is between his thighs…..

Seokjin’s voice is amused.

‘What are you staring at?’

‘Nothing,’ you squeak.

Seokjin gets up. ‘I was just going to have lunch. There’s a little place around the block I like. Do you want to come with?’

‘S-s-sure,’ you say, wondering if you’re dreaming. Maybe you’d knocked your head and you just haven’t realised it yet.

Maybe you’ll wake up and you’ll just be on the floor of the studio and ---

‘Hey,’ Seokjin says, his voice pulling you out of your little spiral. ‘I can carry you there if you want.’

‘No, I’ll walk,’ you say. You put some weight on your sore ankle. ‘I’m fine.’

***

You are not fine, but Kim Seokjin is. He is damn fine.

He’s changed out of his fencing gear and into the usual loose tee and sweats he comes to the studio in, and he really shouldn’t look as fine as he does.

‘What are you doing on Saturday night?’ he asks. ‘My friend Yoongi’s doing a gig, I was going to go support him. It’s probably the last night in a while I’ll get off before I really need to focus on training for the Asian Games.’

‘I don’t have plans,’ you tell him.

‘So do you want to come?’ Seokjin asks. ‘If not I can meet you before.’

‘I’d like to come.’

Seokjin looks pleased. ‘I’ll pick you up.’

You’re glad your choice of attire seems to fit right in at the club Seokjin’s friend Yoongi is performing at.

Seokjin hands you your drink and stands next to you. He’s dressed up for tonight, and he looks so pretty you’d be intimidated if it weren’t for the horrific puns he’s been dropping on you since he picked you up.

His hair’s styled back from his forehead instead of flopping into his face. The button-up shirt he’s got on is unbuttoned over a crisp white shirt.

You’d known he’s taller than you, of course, but you hadn’t realised how attractive you’d find it.

Seokjin nods. ‘How’s your drink?’

‘Yeah, it’s great, thank you.’

‘You look really pretty,’ Seokjin tells you.

You look down at your clothes like you hadn’t agonised for a half hour.

‘How do you know Yoongi?’ you ask.

Seokjin puts out an arm in front of you as a group of men pass by, too close.

‘Went to school together,’ he says. ‘Did you go to school with Jungkook?’

‘He came to train with my parents when he was a kid,’ you tell Seokjin. ‘We used to compete together.’

‘Why did you give up fencing?’

He seems genuinely curious.

‘Wasn’t good enough,’ you say.

Seokjin looks at you searchingly.

‘I didn’t want it enough,’ you amend.

He nods. ‘That’s fair. I used to envy all the fencers who got early starts.’

You say, ‘It seems like you’re doing ok.’

You’re teasing him, of course, he’s a phenomenal fencer, and he’s got time to make his mark.

‘I kicked your ass today,’ he agrees.

You laugh. ‘Look at the size of you.’

‘Didn’t realise you were looking,’ says Seokjin, and there’s a flash of heat in his gaze.

Your heart starts to pound faster.

His eyelids lower just a fraction, enough that he looks devastatingly sleepy-eyed, lazy, when he says, ‘I’m sorry about your ankle.’

It’s hard to think when he’s looking at you like that.

Thankfully, the MC announces that Daegu’s very own Suga will be taking the stage, so you don’t have to muster enough voice to reply.

Seokjin’s friend Yoongi has a raw power to his voice, a kind of irresistible, sexy energy that draws you in even when it looks like he’s making barely any effort.

You’re kind of glad you never went to school with either of them.

After his performance, Seokjin takes you backstage to meet him.

Yoongi greets Seokjin with affection. His forehead still gleams with sweat, his hair is saturated with it.

He smiles politely at you as Seokjin introduces you.

You compliment him on his performance as Seokjin goes to get more drinks.

‘Seokjin says he went to dinner at your parent’s house the other day,’ Yoongi says.

‘You can come too,’ you say, not missing a beat. ‘My mom’s broth is delicious.’

Yoongi laughs. ‘Sure, I’d love that.’

‘Will you be around for the games?’ you ask.

‘I’ll probably try to be around if Seokjin competes,’ Yoongi says.

‘Great, I’ll see you there, then. My friend Jungkook’s going to the qualifying rounds as well.’

‘Perfect, you can explain the rules to me,’ Yoongi says.

You can’t imagine watching fencing with someone who doesn’t know the rules.

‘Ah, damn. Now I’ve fallen in your estimation,’ Yoongi says, softly.

You can’t help but laugh. ‘It’s ok, I can’t perform like you can.’

Seokjin returns.

‘I’m coming to dinner at Y/N’s mom’s house next time,’ Yoongi informs him.

‘And he’s coming to watch you fence,’ you say.

‘Great, you can explain how it all works to him. He doesn’t listen to me,’ Seokjin says, easy.

Yoongi laughs. ‘You’re too busy complaining about how I never listen to actually teach me anything.’

You tune out as the boys argue good-naturedly.

Seokjin gets your attention with a hand on your shoulder. ‘We should get going. I’ve got an early start tomorrow.’

He drops you off outside your apartment.

‘Thank you,’ you say. ‘I had a great time.’

Seokjin grins. ‘Me too. We should go to Yoongi’s next gig.’

‘Love to.’

Seokjin gets out of the car, but you’ve already opened your own door.

‘Should I walk you to your door?’ he asks.

You can’t stop a giggle. Your door is barely two metres from where you’re parked.

‘I think I’ll be ok, you know.’

Seokjin leans over you a little.

His lips are close to yours, pink, plump, pretty.

‘Night Seokjin,’ you say, looking at him.

‘Night, Y/N,’ he replies. He leans down to kiss you on the cheek.

It’s sweet, warm, and he smells so good your heart does a backflip.

It’s the perfect end to the night.

***

Your voice is hoarse from cheering Jungkook on through the qualifying rounds. Seokjin, who’s higher ranked nationally and internationally, is only just fencing his first bout now.

He cuts a beautiful figure as he walks through the arena in his fencing whites, tall and lean. With his fencing mask off, his gorgeous face is on show, and you can see heads turning as he passes.

He stops in front of where you’re seated, eyes scanning through the people around you. When he sees you his face breaks into a smile, and your heart flutters.

Your own smile is bright, happy. You probably look idiotic smiling at him like this, but you can’t find it in yourself to care.

He lays his bag on the ground, pulls out a foil and starts warming up.

Beside you, sweaty Jungkook chugs water and nudges you.

Despite his sweatiness, you put an arm around him.

‘You’re doing amazing, JK, you’ll make the team for sure.’

His trademark shy smile is so bashful you think you can hear a collective sigh from the room.

Your friend is a heartstopper, for sure.

‘Well, there’s two rounds to go,’ he mumbles, faux-modest.

‘That’s true,’ you say, seriously. ‘And Wang Jinsong is strong today.’

His brows furrow, and his lips are already pouting when you laugh.

‘You’ll be fine, JK.’

Seokjin’s bout starts, and he lunges forward, aggressive, quick, skilled.

You wonder if his fencing style reflects his personality. He’s quick but calculated, a distinct style evident in his movements and approach.

At the end of his bout, which he wins with ease, he barely looks like he’s broken a sweat.

You’re impressed, and you should be more impressed by his skill than his thighs but damn his thighs are beautiful, long, lean, muscled.

You’re heading down to congratulate him when he’s approached by a fellow fencer. She takes her mask off, long hair swinging, and smiles at him.

Seokjin seems happy to see her, he’s smiling back.

They look striking together, both tall, long-limbed, beautiful.

‘Looks like you have competition,’ Jungkook says, unhelpfully, and you grab his arm.

‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ you say, a confidence in your voice you don’t feel.

Jin turns to you as you and Jungkook approach.

‘Hey,’ he says, warmth in his voice.

He exchanges congratulations with Jungkook.

‘So, are we on for a drink later?’ asks the tall girl.

‘Sure,’ Jin says, easily.

You work hard to keep any of your emotions showing on your face.

‘You did amazing, Jin,’ you say.

‘Thanks,’ Jin says.

There’s a bit of an awkward pause, and you turn to Jungkook. ‘So I should help you get ready.’

Jungkook’s quick sometimes when he wants to be. ‘Sure,’ he says.

You leave Jin and the tall girl standing together whilst you walk off with Jungkook.

‘Want me to kick his ass in our bout?’ Jungkook offers, after a moment.

‘For what?’ you scoff. ‘It was just a kiss, and he’s just going for a drink with a girl with legs longer than my entire body. No biggie.’

Jungkook laughs, and a moment later, you’re laughing too.

***

You do not know how Jungkook managed to convince you to come out tonight.

You’re more than happy to congratulate him and Jin for getting on the national team for the Asian games, but you do not need to see gorgeous Jin getting off with tall girl, who also made the women’s team.

You’re the least decorated person in the bar. Normally that would be fine with you, but your confidence is low tonight. You’re wearing a short skirt that would look a lot better if you had longer legs.

You collect a round of drinks and bring them to Jungkook, Mari and your friends.

In your absence at the bar, Seokjin and tall girl, whose name you now learn is Jihyo, have both joined your table.

You’re trying not to look to closely at how close they’re standing to each other.

‘I’ll get more drinks,’ you say, putting the tray down.

‘I’ll come with,’ Jin says. He looks at Jihyo. ‘Usual?’ he asks.

You don’t want to know how he knows her usual drink.

There’s a bit of a wait whilst the bartender makes your orders.

You look at the bottles lined up behind the bar like they’re the most fascinating thing you’ve ever seen.

Jin clears his throat. ‘You look beautiful.’

You turn to him, expression carefully blank. ‘Thanks, Jin. Congratulations on getting on the national team.’

‘Thanks.’

You’re in damage control mode. You’re not going to ask him how he knows beautiful Jihyo.

Probably they fenced together at one point.

You very much hope so and also that she kicked his ass, unlike you.

‘Need a hand?’ asks the gorgeous bartender. He nods to your full tray, smiling at you.

Jin clears his throat again, stepping forward. ‘Thanks, I’ve got it.’

You fall into conversation with the person next to you, a pink-haired man with silver earrings and a flirty grin called Jimin.

He invites you to dance with him, and you’re tipsy enough to say yes.

You catch glimpses of Jungkook and Mari as Jimin whirls you around the dancefloor.

You’re coming out of the toilets when you run into Seokjin again.

‘Hey,’ he says. ‘I haven’t seen much of you tonight.’

‘I’m here now,’ you reply, lightly.

‘Yeah. Want to go somewhere a little quieter?’ he asks.

You step out into the cool night air with Seokjin.

‘Hey,’ he says. ‘There’s a dessert place down the block. Want to get ice cream?’

You’re not sure about Seokjin’s taste in ice-cream but he sure looks pretty eating it.

He swallows a bite, throat working, and you avert your eyes.

‘I’m really glad I get to celebrate getting on the team, here with you,’ he says, suddenly.

You smile at him. ‘Me too. I won’t keep you long, I know you probably want to get back.’

Seokjin frowns a little. ‘Do you want to get back to the club? Because I’d rather be here, with you.’

‘What about your friends?’ you ask.

‘Hey, I owe you,’ Seokjin says, jokingly. ‘You opened the school at six am for months to give me extra training time.’

You try not to look too disappointed at his words.

‘I was happy to do it,’ you say. ‘You don’t owe me anything.’

Seokjin laughs quietly. ‘I’m saying all the wrong things, aren’t I? I just want to spend time with you, because I like your company and I think I won’t have this opportunity in the coming few months up to the games.’

‘I like spending time with you too,’ you say, honestly.

‘Great. That’s settled then.’

Your phone starts buzzing. It’s a drunk and hungry Jungkook.

‘Are you ok?’ he hollers into the phone. ‘Where are you? I can’t see Seokjin either!’

You roll your eyes at Jin. ‘We’re at an ice cream place, down the road. Do you want ice-cream?’

Jungkook slumps next to you as Seokjin gets him ice-cream.

‘Am I cockblocking you?’ he asks quietly, eyes bright.

You laugh. ‘You should ask Seokjin that. Anyway, we need to look out for each other, and you’re too drunk to go anywhere alone right now.’

Jungkook perks up as Seokjin comes back with ice-cream for him.

‘Am I cockblocking you?’ he asks.

Seokjin, to his credit, just smiles.

‘I’ll get you ice-cream anytime, Jungkookie.’

After you’ve deposited Jungkook at home, you turn to Seokjin.

You’re about to ask if he’ll be ok getting home when he leans close, head dipping to bring his face closer to yours.

‘Can I kiss you?’ he asks.

You slide a hand around his neck, pulling him closer still.

He swivels a little so he can face you straight on, and his lips capture yours in a kiss.

He tastes better than all your fantasies, caramel sweetness and the cherry chapstick you’ve seen him use sometimes.

You sometimes tease him about it, ask him which teenager he stole it from.

There’s nothing innocent about the way he licks into your mouth, the press of his hips against yours.

‘Want to come over to mine?’ he asks.

***

Seokjin drops his bag of foils by the entryway of his loft-style apartment.

You lean against the front door. You started off wanting to look around but now you’re just looking at him.

He’s so pretty, with his perfect skin, his hair pushed back from his gorgeous face.

He tilts his head, smiling at you.

‘You can come in,’ he says, sounding amused.

He takes a step towards you, then another.

Now he’s so close you have to tilt your head back to see his face.

‘Seokjin,’ you say, nervous.

‘It’s ok,’ he says. ‘I’ll take you home right now if that’s what you want.’

You search his eyes. Then you put a hand on his chest.

Seokjin leans down. He’s still smiling as he kisses you. His lips are soft, gentle, undemanding.

Your own lips part under his, and in the end it’s your tongue that slips into his mouth first.

He lets you taste him, one hand gentle on your hip, his other hand cupping your jaw, fingers sliding under your hair.

You’re so lost in the taste and feel of him that it takes you a moment to realise you’re pressed against his front, fisting handfuls of his shirt.

He doesn’t seem to mind.

His lips are flushed from your kisses. He kisses your forehead when you pull away, and you wrap an arm around his neck, tugging him down so that your lips meet again.

His hand slides up your side, higher and higher, and at the first pass of his thumb over the curve of your breast, you moan softly. You’re panting a little, sticky and wet with arousal, and your clit throbs. You roll your hips against his, seeking stimulation, and feel the hard length of him against your belly.

Seokjin’s kissing down your neck now, humming against your skin. God, he feels good. The suction of his lips drags another moan from you.

He pulls back, admiring the mark he’s made on your skin. ‘My bed’s in there,’ he says.

As he turns, the profile of the bulge in his groin sends a gush of wetness between your thighs.

Fuck. You want it, you want him.

He smiles at you, like he hasn’t just caught you staring at his erection.

When he holds out his hand, you take it.

Seokjin takes you to his bedroom. He says, ‘Come sit.’

You sit next to him on his bed. He doesn’t give you any time to feel awkward, sliding his arm around you and pulling you into his chest.

His kisses are drugging, slow and languid and luring you into a pleasured haze. You have no idea how long you’ve been kissing for when you become dimly aware of the wetness between your thighs, the throbbing of your clit.

Seokjin grunts as your hands explore his body.

God, he feels so good.

You ask, hand flat on the broad expanse of his chest, if he can take his shirt off.

Seokjin unbuttons his shirt obligingly. You tug your dress over your head.

He gazes at you, frank admiration in his eyes. ‘You’re really pretty.’

You can feel your cheeks heat.

He traces a finger over the strap of your bra, then he lowers his head to kiss.

You tug him on top of you.

He comes willingly, settling his hips between your legs, erection pressing against your core.

You’re impatient with the layers of clothing between you. You want to feel more of him.

‘Take more off,’ you urge. Seokjin smiles at you, a little goofy, a lot handsome.

You encourage him by lifting your hips and wriggling your panties down.

‘Take everything off,’ Seokjin says to you. His voice is low now, his eyes dark.

You unclasp your bra.

For a moment he just stares at you.

Then he’s kissing you again, positioning himself, rolling a condom on.

He’s thicker than you expected. You grab his shoulder as he pushes into you, and he stills immediately.

‘You ok?’ he asks.

You shift the angle of your hips and spread your legs more. ‘Yeah.’

He goes slow, and you marvel at his self-control.

‘You good?’ he checks when he’s fully inside you. Your grip on his shoulder tightens.

‘Yeah I’m good,’ you say.

‘You feel really good,’ Seokjin tells you, as he starts to move. He’s quiet then for a bit, concentrating as he thrusts, rocking against your hips.

God, he feels good.

You bite your lip, and Seokjin says, ‘fuck, you look so pretty taking my cock.’

His words make you tighten, and he smiles, slow.

‘You liked that. You want to hear more, baby girl?’

You’d never normally put up with being called baby girl but somehow when he says it, it sounds hot.

You moan as he thrusts harder.

‘What’s that, baby? Do you like it? Let me hear you.’

He tweaks your nipple, and you moan again.

He’s starting to get breathless now.

‘S’ fucking good,’ he pants.

You realise your nails are digging into his shoulder.

‘Seokjin!’ You cry out on a particularly hard thrust, when he grinds against your clit.

‘That’s it,’ he murmurs. ‘Who fucks you like this, baby?’

There’s pleasure in every stroke, spreading out from your spread cunt to your thighs, sending flares of sensation down to your toes.

You realise he’s waiting for an answer when he pinches your nipple, hard.

‘I asked you a question, love. Who fucks you like this?’

‘You do,’ you tell him. ‘Fuck, Seokjin, I’m close. Fuck.’

He presses his face to your neck, and you can feel his lips curve. ‘Gonna cum for me?’ he whispers in your ear, voice velvety, smooth.

‘Yeah,’ you tell him. ‘Yeah.’

‘Good girl,’ he praises when your head arches back and your body thrums with your orgasm.

He slows, thrusting gently as your body gradually relaxes into the bed.

‘You good?’ he asks. His voice is gentle, despite the fact you can still feel him, hard and twitching inside you.

‘I’m good,’ you assure him.

‘Good. Now you’re gonna take my cum,’ he says, and despite the fact you’ve just cum you feel another thrill of arousal.

‘Take it like a good girl, baby,’ he says.

He slows his strokes, pulling almost all the way out before slamming into you again.

‘Can you take more?’ he asks.

You press a kiss to his neck. ‘Give me more, Seokjin.’

He falls quiet again, fucking into you until his thrusts get slower and slower and then, with a deep groan, he thrusts again, and is still.

‘So good,’ he tells you, face buried in your hair. ‘So good.’

***

Jungkook’s rustling into your bag like a ferret.

‘Stop that,’ you say, grabbing his hands to make him stop.

‘I need a snack,’ he whines.

‘You don’t need anything, we just ate,’ you tell him firmly.

‘I’ve been training hard,’ he tells you.

‘When are you leaving for national training?’ you ask, exasperated.

‘Next week,’ he replies. ‘Seokjin and I are rooming together.’

‘I’d better warn Seokjin that you snore, give him time to pick a new roommate,’ you say.

Jungkook frowns, then calms when you toss him a snack.

‘Are you guys dating now?’

‘Yes,’ says Seokjin, coming up behind you and grabbing another snack out of your bag.

You look up at him, flustered.

‘Aren’t we?’ he asks. ‘I mean, we’ve been —-‘

Your father’s voice sounds from behind Seokjin, and all three of you freeze.

Seokjin recovers his composure first. ‘I’ve been planning to tell you, sir, that Y/N and I are dating,’ he says, polished, calm.

You and Jungkook exchange a look.

Your father looks at you, and you straighten in your seat, nudging Jungkook’s hand away from your bag where he’s fishing for another snack.

‘Well, that’s fine,’ your father says, gruffly.

‘I’ll do my best by her,’ Seokjin says, seriously, and your heart starts to flutter.

He smiles at you.

Beside you, Jungkook crumples his snack packet, loudly and obtrusively.

‘I’ll look after Jungkook too,’ Seokjin says, and Jungkook rolls his eyes.

‘I don’t –’ Jungkook starts, whiny, at the same time your father says, ‘Good man.’ He pats Seokjin on the back.

As soon as your father leaves the room you pull Seokjin into a hug. ‘That was kinda sexy,’ you whisper.

He quirks an eyebrow at you and whispers back, ‘You know what this means.’

You look at him curiously.

‘I’m the boss. You’d better do as I say.’

Your mouth drops open at his devastatingly sexy grin.

‘I’ll see you for dinner later,’ he says, turning to leave.

‘Where are we going for dinner?’ Jungkook asks, coming up behind you, slinging a heavy arm around your shoulder.

‘You’re not coming,’ you tell him flatly.

‘Hyung will let me come.’

You turn and swipe the streak of chocolate off his cheek.

‘Come on, let’s fence. You need to work off those snacks.’

Jungkook lifts his top to show you his abs, and you roll your eyes so hard you nearly give yourself a headache.

‘Put those away Jeon, for the love of god.’

***

It’s been two weeks since Jungkook and Seokjin left for training camp.

Seokjin calls you, like clockwork, every other night, sometimes every night.

You learn what his voice sounds like when he’s tired, when he’s excited, and when Jungkook’s annoying him.

You learn he can talk about himself a lot, and it should be offputting but it’s endearing. Mainly because you agree with how good looking he thinks he is.

Jungkook often involves himself in your conversations, telling you about his fencing partners, occasionally about girls he thinks are into him.

It’s quieter in the fencing studio without them but you’re excited for them.

You’re closing up one day when you hear a familiar voice say your name.

You turn, the ripple of excitement morphing into a tide when you realise it’s really Seokjin.

He’s leaning against the entrance to the studio, smiling at you.

‘Seokjin!’

He’s faster, covering more ground than you as you split the distance between you.

You bury your face in his chest partly to hide your giddy smile.

Seokjin’s arms have always been strong, but as he holds you, you notice the changes in his physique.

He’s leaner, harder and god he looks prettier than ever.

He tilts his head down to kiss you, and as your lips meet, the studio lights click off.

‘It’s a timer,’ you say, waiting for your eyes to adjust.

In the dark like this, your other senses are amplified. You can hear his quiet breathing, smell the cologne he uses, fresh and crisp.

Seokjin’s hand slides down your arm, to the foil in your hand.

‘Are you still attached?’ he asks.

He lifts the foil and touches the tip to your lame jacket.

The green light of the scoreboard lights up, illuminating the darkness.

It’s familiar to you as a night light. You guess Seokjin feels that way about it too.

He smiles down at you. He looks beautiful in the half-light.

‘I’ve missed you,’ he tells you.

You hope he can see the happiness on your face.

‘I’ve missed you too.’

The green light clicks off as you kiss him, but you don’t need it.

You curl your hand around Seokjin’s, and he drops the foil. It clatters to the ground.

At this point, his body, even in its slightly altered state, is as familiar to you as your own.

He curls a hand around the back of your head, another around your ass, and pulls you close.

It’s many minutes before you emerge from the studio, Seokjin’s arms still around you like he doesn’t want to let you go.

His lips are flushed from your kisses, the sweats doing a poor job of concealing his arousal.

‘Shit, look at you, wrecked for me,’ you say, teasing.

Seokjin just laughs. ‘Talk all the smack you want now, when we get in bed I’ll shut you up,’ he jokes.

It’s a short drive back to yours, but it’s still too long.

Seokjin starts nuzzling your neck as you fumble with your keys, lifting your hair out of the way.

You let out a barely suppressed moan as he nips at the join between your neck and shoulder, and Seokjin presses his hips against your ass, grinding his erection between your ass cheeks.

The door opens, and you stumble forward, Seokjin’s arm around your hips, his hand still tangled in your hair.

‘Bed,’ he grunts.

You shed your clothes quickly and when you turn to help Seokjin with his you’re confronted with his bare chest.

His gorgeous, golden skin gleams in the light from the streetlamps through your open windows.

You dip your head and lick a strip up his chest, tongue flicking over his flat nipple.

Seokjin hisses, his hand over the bulge in his briefs, rubbing himself for relief.

He tugs your bra strap down and cups your bare breast, thumb flicking slowly across your hard nipple. His hands are more callused than they were.

You like discovering all these changes in him amidst all the familiar.

‘Can I?’ he asks, voice strained, fingers hooked in the waistband of your panties.

You slip your panties off, and he buries his face in your cunt.

‘Gonna get you wet so I can fuck you hard,’ he tells you. His fingers slip inside you as he sucks at your clit, and you’re so sensitive already you’re pushed into an orgasm.

‘Fuck,’ Seokjin swears, eyes intent on you. ‘Cumming already?’

He fingers you through your orgasm, stopping when you put your hand over his forearm.

‘Get inside me,’ you tell him.

Seokjin hesitates. ‘You’re sensitive, baby.’

‘I want you,’ you plead.

Seokjin laces his fingers through yours as he positions himself against you.

He goes slow, watching your face as he inches in.

Your cunt pulses as he enters you, and Seokjin stops when you moan.

‘Can you take me?’ he asks, voice strained.

‘I can take you,’ you assure him.

You both moan when he’s all the way in, hips flush against yours.

You tilt your hips, and Seokjin grunts.

‘So good,’ he tells you, ‘s fucking good.’

He moves slow, purposeful, grinding against you, and you feel the pleasure start to build again.

‘I’ve missed you,’ he murmurs into your ear, lips against your cheek.

He groans when you tilt your hips, lifting to meet his thrusts.

‘I’ve missed you too,’ you tell him.

His body looks so good over yours as he fucks you, you almost can’t believe he’s real.

His biceps flexes as he takes his weight on that arm. His other hand grips your hip, and he grinds on you so hard you squeal.

His hand relaxes immediately. ‘Did I hurt you?’

‘No, give me more, Jin,’ you murmur.

He kisses your neck, lips plush on your skin. ‘I’m giving you all I’ve got, my love. You’re so good, look at you taking my cock.’

Your cunt tightens around him but he doesn’t ease up.

Not when you’re reduced to gasping his name.

Not when you’re pulsing around him as you cum.

He keeps rocking into you until you grab his chin and plant your mouth on his.

He kisses you, open-mouthed, as his thrusts get sloppier and sloppier until finally he cums, spilling inside you whilst your name falls from his lips. Fervent, like a prayer.

You hold him whilst he recovers from giving you the best fucking of your life.

***

It’s sometime between midnight and dawn when you awaken to Jin’s hand tracing a line down your bare back.

He stops just shy of the cleft of your ass.

You turn your head on the pillow to face him.

‘Hey Jin,’ you say, sleepy, soft.

He’s smiling at you, beautiful in the half-light of your bedroom window.

‘You can touch,’ you say, as his hand once again stops above your ass.

‘Here?’ Jin asks, fingers tracing over your ass to your cunt. You’re wet for him, you’ve been wet since you woke up to him touching you.

‘There,’ you confirm, and Jin’s fingers trace between your folds, like a tease, before he’s entering you.

He stills, fingers curled.

You turn on your side so you’re facing each other.

Your forearms cross, his long and strong and muscled, yours less so, as you reach for his cock and he slides his fingers into you again.

He’s hard, warm, twitching a little in your grasp.

‘I want you inside, Jin,’ you gasp as he pumps his fingers slowly inside you, stroking, filling you but not quite enough.

‘I want to be inside,’ he answers.

He pulls you under him and enters you again, and god, he feels so good you don’t want it to end.

His rhythm’s slower now, purposeful, pulling you to the edge relentlessly.

He groans with every thrust, going deep, hitting you just right. You hold on to his ass, digging your heels into the bed to give you purchase to fuck him back.

Jin seems to like it.

He swears. ‘I don’t think I can hold it, you feel so good, my love.’

‘Don’t hold it, cum for me, Jin,’ you coax.

He plunges into you again and again, and you cry his name as your climax hits.

‘Thank fuck,’ Jin groans. He’s already cumming, you can feel him wet and slick in you as you clench around him, milking him.

Jin pulls you on top of him as he collapses back down on your bed.

You press a kiss to his sweaty, broad chest.

‘We can do this anytime,’ you say, joking.

‘5 stars?’ he asks.

‘Four. I’ll give you another if you let me suck your cock.’

Jin laughs and pushes your face into his chest.

‘I don’t have to leave until mid morning.’

‘When’s your match?’ you ask, settling into his shoulder.

‘Next week.’

‘Lucky you’re not a boxer, I’ve heard they can’t nut for a month before each bout.’

‘You can blow me in the changing rooms on match day, I’ll never turn you down,’ Jin says.

You both laugh.

‘I’ll make you breakfast before you go,’ you promise.

‘I’ll hold you to that,’ Jin says. ‘And the blow job.’

‘None of that is a hardship, Jin.’

‘Marry me,’ he says, instantly.

You laugh again. ‘Cuddle me to sleep.’

‘Anytime,’ he promises, sounding sleepy already. ‘Anytime.’

***

You’re sitting in the stands waiting for the final fencing bout of the Asian Games.

Jungkook’s won a title in the team event, and he’s sitting between you and Yoongi, waiting for Jin to walk out onto the piste.

Jin emerges from the changing rooms, blinding and brilliant in his fencing whites.

Not for the first time, you admire how beautiful he looks, tall and strong.

He stops at the end of the piste. He looks up at you in the stands and waves.

You wave back, and Jin lifts the hand not holding his foil.

He blows you a kiss.

Beside you, Yoongi snorts and Jungkook bursts out laughing.

You only have eyes for Jin.

He slips his mask on and greets his opponent.

You know as well as Jin does that whether he wins or not, you’ll both be ok.

Jin slips into en garde, graceful, deadly.

The ref calls, ‘Allez.’

#seokjin fic #seokjin smut #seokjin x reader #catch of the century

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beetlebethwrites · 2 years

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hi hi! first of all I want to state how much I adore your IF so far, I haven't found many IF that are purely slice of life and I am loving it ❤️ 😍 💖 second! do you have any recommendations for IFs? I've just started moving away from the CoG forums and the content here on tumblr is just 🤌 but I'm not too sure where to start? tysm 😊

I mean, I have so many recommendations tbqh. It's a hell of a list and hopefully, I haven't forgotten anyone by the end. I would say that if you've been around for a hot minute you probably know most of these but I'm old and rarely see new stuff atm because I'm a busy bean so...

Recs under the cut;

@northern-passage is such an easy recommendation for me. I'm not super into your more 'classic' fantasy as a genre but Kit has really built up their characters to be something special. The concept of the hunter is a great one and the branching Kit does is insane. I'm so interested to see where it goes and also ready for it to destroy me emotionally.

I haven't played @speakergame in a little while but the cosy vibes I try to get into YLAF are also here. It's not slice of life but it's similar to that with a heap of supernatural stirred in. I'm also excited for @partiallystarsif, which promises to be a game that I've been wishing someone would write.

Project Hadea by @nyehilismwriting is one of the most top tier sci-fi I've read in a while. It has a great MC, a badass partner in Nash and also BUGS. Again, I'm super looking forward to seeing what happens in the next chapter after that cliffhanger. Shit is about to hit the fan and I am here for it.

@if-eventhorizon is written by actual love of my life Brigid. Event Horizon is your pretty typical crew in space doing stuff they shouldn't be kind of sci-fi and I adore it! Can't wait to find out what everyone has done in their past to be there and unravel the situation. Love it! Brigid is also an incredibly talented artist, also writes @if-closedloop and...

@if-lostbirds is again written by Brigid, and although they profess post-apocalyptic Western sci-fi to be niche, I whole heartedly disagree. I adore the writing in this one, they really did something there and I think everyone will get something out of this one. If you're looking for something a little different with fewer (but super meaningful) choices then this is for you! Also I did convince them to put the big worm back into it so... worm.

For someone who would say she doesn't like a western, @larkin-if is also a bit of me. It's got vampires and cool character dynamics between the Preacher (MC) and their father figure Wyatt. Not to mention the ROs are all really cool. I'm excited to meet Ace in the future but it's the whole plot of attempting to hide your true identity that really hooked me in.

@bodycountgame is currently on a little bit of a hiatus because Nell is super busy with real life 😷 but it's still a stand out fave for me, undoubtedly worth the wait. If you want something that's campy, written in proper British dialect and is basically love island with a hell of a twist then this is for you! I can't recommend body count enough, it's what got me moved way from CoG games and into this little community we have!

@thistooshallpass-if is an IF with some of my favourite characters (not hurt by the fact that thyme is also one of my fave people!) I can't wait to see where it goes as I've been promised angst and knowing them I have no doubt! I'm also mega excited for @writingnights because different takes on supernatural creatures is always fun to me.

When Twilight Strikes by @evertidings is popular for a reason. I'm a few chapters behind but just writing about it has made me want to sit down and catch up! Kristi's characters are fun and feel like people to me with their real quirks, which is always something I enjoy. I can't wait to solve the mystery with this one.

@attollogame is a pretty hard one to describe to me so I'd say just play it? The writing and lore surrounding it is so so solid. It's all pretty much just a vibe, and a good one at that. I am not up to date at all but everyone should be better than me and read it!

Golden by @milaswriting is amazing! It's a supernatural romance game and you can just tell that Mila cares so much about the characters she writes, it really comes through in her writing. She's also over at @milaswrittenworld and I'd encourage a follow all around because she is just a really lovely gem of a person.

I haven't read @ofna in a little while but I absolutely adored what I did read (god knows how many updates ago it was). The writing is amazing and, again, I can't wait to get to solve the mystery 👀

I've undoubtedly forgotten so many but these are ones that come to my covid addled mind 😅 I hope this is a good starting place for you, anon 💛

#answered <3 #anonymous

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not-poignant · 8 months

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What is the best order to read your works?

It really depends on what you like, anon -> Because I write across quite a few different genres!

If you like original stuff:

If you like contemporary / slice of life, then you might want to start with the Spoils universe, specifically Spoils of the Spoiled and subsequent stories!

If you like omegaverse, you might want to start with the Underline the Rainbow universe! (Careful though, this one's unfinished!)

If you like epic fantasy, you might want to start with the Fae Tales Verse, which is the main canon, with Game Theory as the first story.

If you like epic fantasy but you want to read a standalone instead of something over a million words long, that has a happy ending and is an OT3 (i.e. M/M/M), you might want to read The Wildness Within!

If you like epic fantasy but you want it to be a standalone and you want it to be really dark incest between two brothers that ends up having a hopeful ending despite going to some truly twisted places, you might like Strange Sights!

If you you like epic fantasy but want to read a standalone, and features diplomacy, meeting strange, alien cultures, and dealing with fae who have very unique ways of doing magic and interacting with the world, as well as childhood sexual abuse recovery, and a Mage trained by his father figure who also happens to be the King of the Unseelie fae, you might like the Lone Wolf series, and especially The Nascent Diplomat! (Careful though, this one's unfinished).

If you like fanfiction:

If you like fanfiction where you don't need to know much about the original world, as well as space opera and military / political plots, you might enjoy The Golden Age that Never Was!

If you like fanfiction where you don't need to know much about the original world, as well as classic fairytale fantasy elements, fights between Good and Evil, and obstacles that the heroes need to overcome, as well as a villain-turned-antagonist-turned-antihero, you might like From the Darkness We Rise and its direct sequel, Into Shadows We Fall! This is a GREAT introduction into the Fae Tales universe too!

If you like fanfiction where you don't need to know much about the original world, as well as epic fantasy in an elves/humans/etc. style world that's similar to DND, you might like Stuck on the Puzzle!

If you like fanfiction where you don't need to know much about the original world, as well as dark science fiction with an android/human relationship, you might like Eversion!

If you like fanfiction where you don't need to know much about the original world (and if you ever do, you can just ask me), as well as awesome fantasy/magic worldbuilding, ghosts, and exorcisms as well as fantasy BDSM, with two older lovers, you might like The Beast that Chose Its Own Bridle!

If you like fanfiction where you don't need to know much about the original world, as well as contemporary slice of life about enemies-to-lovers in a small country town you might like The Wind that Cuts the Night or even A Stain that Won't Dissolve (careful though, this one's unfinished!)

But I have no idea what kind of things you like to read or why you're here, or what you've read already (most folks who find me here have read something of mine already, if you haven't, then the above is a pretty good primer - just be aware that I put BDSM in everything, that it's all m/m and that there's always trauma recovery and hopeful or happy endings and you're good to go!) and some folks who like some stories don't read other stories, so there's no point saying 'this is my favourite' or 'this is the best place to start' when it has all the things you hate in it! You know what I mean?

I can't do much off a single sentence, I'm afraid, and because I've written so many different series, across different genres, I have over 5 million words out there, and it's not all in the same series, and it's not all focusing on the same thing. :D

But who knows, maybe you found something this way!

I don't know if you like the dark stuff or if you're uncertain about the dark stuff. If you love kink or don't know how to feel about kink. If you find trauma recovery really squicky or if you're okay with it. And I can't make blanket recommendations on a reading order when I've written millions of words across multiple series and genres.

So I'd much prefer to target recommendations specifically to what you like, anon, because we are not all the same, so I wouldn't give everyone the same reading order to my works :D

Happy reading, if you find something you like, let me know!!

#asks and answers #pia on writing #inadvertent recs #reading order #but not really there doesn't have to be any order here except #when you click on a series link #generally read the first story in that series link #(except for game theory where technically the first story is 'deeper into the woods' but i'm thinking of removing that)#(which is why i didn't suggest it)#anyway hope this helps!

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junebugwriter · 3 months

Text

I can't stop thinking about House (1977).

Haunted houses are a staple of horror culture. The haunted house goes back centuries, back to oral culture, before these kinds of things were written down. There are hundreds of movies about haunted houses, countless books about them. The Haunting of Hill House, the Amityville Horror, The Shining, the Conjuring, on and on there are examples and variations of the genre, and yet we still go back to the well because there is something so eerily alluring, so endlessly fascinating about the haunted house. Yet, I don’t think there is anything that could have really prepared me for the bizarre and surreal experience of watching House (1977), dir. Nobuhiko Obayashi.

I had heard about it in an offhand fashion from some essayists and critics, but only ever in passing and never in any detail. I think mostly that is because it is impossible to really describe, at least in text. It is a fever dream, a nightmare of color and editing that resists description. About halfway through the movie I had a realization: “Oh, I get it. This is a film made by an insane person.”

I know the word gets thrown around a great deal, and usually in an unserious way. It’s an ableist term, for sure, and one that stigmatizes neurodivergent people. But when you watch this film, you will understand what I mean, because there is no better term for the kind of film that was made here. It was made with remarkable craftsmanship, especially for a film with most likely a shoestring budget. The special effects are pretty silly, especially 46 years later, but there is an air of charming artifice to them that lets you know that the filmmakers were in on the gag. Aside from the effects, however, there is a grasp on genre and subversion that not a lot of films lean into, or they might try and fail to do. House, more than anything, has something to say about haunted houses that not every haunted house story would be willing to do.

Once upon a time...

Spoilers for a film from 1977, obviously. Not that it really matters much, because I’m sure you’ve heard a story like this before.

A girl, unhappy with the fact that her father is getting remarried after her mother died, decides to reach out to her mother’s sister, her aunt. The aunt in turn invites her and her friends to come visit for their summer break. The girl, named Gorgeous, takes her friends, Melody, Sweet, Prof, Kung-fu, Fantasy, and Mac, out to the countryside, where they find her aunt’s house, an idyllic rural mansion. The twist, of course, is that the aunt has been dead for years, and lingers on in our world by haunting her ancestral family’s house.

If any of that seems boring to you, well, congratulations, you’ve heard a scary story before. It’s not the novelty of the story itself that is the draw here, but rather in the way it is told, a way that can only be done through cinema. The imagery of this thing is... well, here’s a few images from the film.

And my personal favorite:

That last one is the severed head of a young girl, Mac, biting the rear end of one of the living girls. We’ll get back to Mac.

Images like this are a big part of why medium is so essential to the arts. Because the “story” is basic, but the film is not. Every great story can usually be boiled down to a simple idea. “Man takes a job at a hotel during offseason.” “Family moves into a house where a grisly murder takes place.” “There’s a doll with a ghost inside it.” Simple, adaptable, and leaves room for a storyteller to leave a mark.

House goes all in on artifice and genre, to the point of farce. At the beginning of the film, you would be forgiven for thinking it was a sunny daytime sit-com, and the girls are even introduced as such halfway through the film! It’s bizarre. It changes tone from “slice of life comedy” to “soap melodrama,” and in brief moments when Kung-fu has any action, “kung-fu movie.” The director took one look at the screenplay and went, “I’ll take everything on the menu.”

You don’t make a movie like House without being in love with film as a medium.

I could go on for a while about the effects, the tonal whiplash, the aesthetics of the thing, and I am very tempted by doing so. I could just list the incredible things this movie does. The set-piece deaths that come in quick succession through the back half of the movie. But that’s best left to someone with a film degree, who can get into the granularity of the medium that I cannot.

No, what makes me really keep thinking about the movie starts with poor, innocent Mac. And once you figure out what the film is doing, you realize that this is not a movie about a haunted house. Haunted house stories seldom are. Haunted houses are about us.

We need to talk about Mac.

Mac is a girl who likes food. That’s it. That’s all the character she was given. Mac likes to eat, is almost always eating something, and is frequently teased and mocked by her friends for being “fat,” which... well. I don’t know much about Japanese culture, but I do know that there is a rigid enforcement of conformity to certain ideals, which often gets translated to shaming and fatphobia. Mac liked to eat, and so she was the first real punchline of the film. Even her name, Mac, was an intentional joke about eating, a reference the word “stomach,” or even MacDonalds, or some other joke that does not translate from Japanese cleanly. All the girls are given Disney Snow White dwarf naming schemes, but only hers is most clearly a joke.

I was instantly invested in Mac’s wellbeing. Sadly, of course, she was the first one to die.

Mac died first, because she was obviously the odd girl out in a group full of oddballs. She’s the only one that really gets the worst teasing, even worse than Kung-fu, who is mocked for being “manly,” but whose manliness is seen with a kind of awe and reverence, rather than obvious revulsion. Mac was always seen eating something, or in pursuit of food. It is this pursuit of food that in the end results in her death. She went out to the well where she was storing her watermelon, and when a girl goes to check in on her, she is found as only an animated, floating head in the well, a head that makes a joke and then bites a girl on the butt because even in death, she is still hungry. Death cannot keep Mac from being the butt of a joke.

It is in Mac’s shameful death that you realize what the film is doing. Because Mac, though her name was a joke, was just as flatly characterized as everyone else is in the film. All these girls have silly, descriptive names, and all of them have extremely flat, one-dimensional characterizations. Kung-fu is sporty. Sweet is... sweet. Melody plays music, Prof is smart, Fantasy always has her head in the clouds, and Gorgeous is the most beautiful. And all of them, every single one, gets devoured by the house. And in the end, you realize why the house is eating them.

You see, the house is hungry because the ghost who animates it is still waiting, a cautionary tale about putting your own life on hold waiting for a man who will never return. See, the aunt who owns the house was betrothed to a soldier during WWII. She promised that no matter what, she would always be waiting to marry him. When he never returned home, the aunt grows bitter, and dies unmarried. Since then, she preys upon the lives of young, unmarried women in her bridal gown, feasting upon their youth and vigor to sustain her undeath. She literally put her own dreams, her own life, aside for the sake of a man because that is what women are supposed to do in a traditional, patriarchal society.

Once you learn this, you understand why Mac had to die first. All the girls’ names are not only descriptive, they are also flattering to an extent. You could hypothetically ask a man “What are the qualities of a good woman, one you would like to marry?” And the response might be, “I’d like someone smart,” “I’d like someone sweet,” or “I’d like someone beautiful,” etc. So in response, these girls all are simply the embodiment of an idealized feminine attribute, something desired or seen as valuable in a woman. All, of course, except for Mac.

Mac was the joke. She was the most disposable, the one ostracized and teased even by her friends, and also just so happens to embody an attribute that is not classically seen as desirable by patriarchal society. She eats. She consumes and is consumed by consumption. Therefore, she is the first to become consumed by the House.

All the girls meet with a similarly ironic punishment, a Dantesque hell of the film’s making. Sweet is smothered by an avalanche of pillows and mattresses. Gorgeous, sitting in front of the mirror, is swallowed up by vanity and possessed by the ideal itself. Melody’s hands are eaten by a piano. Kung-Fu physically tries to fight the house but is in the end broken by violent means. Prof drowns in a pool of blood as she reads the ghostly aunt’s diary, explaining the tragic end of the House’s owner, and dies in pursuit of knowledge. Fantasy, the final girl, is cradled in the arms of the possessed Gorgeous, and is gently comforted to eternal sleep. The final scene involves Gorgeous meeting her new stepmother in the House, and the cycle will continue anew with this new victim.

Each girl is in the end consumed by the identity which they embody, a grim and grisly vision of what might await them if they ever lived to be adults. The point then is that girlhood and womanhood is only ever seen as an inherently objectifying gaze of the masculine, patriarchal world in which they lived. Mac, the first to go, was but an appetizer, the most visibly mockable victim in the parade of victimhood. The House devours them because society devours us, despite our innocence, despite what qualities we might embody. The aunt was virtuous too, remember. It is virtuous to be patient, to be honest, to be faithful, even unto death. But what if that life is put entirely aside for the betterment of someone else? What is left of the woman left behind to mourn, to grieve? She carries on bearing the weight of expectation. Femininity in relation to patriarchy is a funhouse mirror, warping and distorting what makes us unique, highlighting and capitalizing on our flaws. The ghostly aunt perpetuates the horrifying cycle of predatory expectation, and in turn inflicts those expectations upon the next generation. Gorgeous then the final victim lives on to victimize another.

What is left is simply leftovers

Considering the film made it into the Criterion Collection, it’s safe to say that I’m not the only one who sees the value in House. There is something to the cult horror flick that lingers in the minds of its viewers. Each of us is in our own way haunted by the society that we participate in. Each bears the weight of patriarchy and are either consumed or rejected by it. Both paths lead to destruction.

House is not a hopeful movie, by any means. It's not meant to be a cautionary tale, either. Nobody is virtuous enough to survive, because there is not virtue great enough when the world values those virtues and seeks to consume those who embody them. I do think it is possible in real life to live beyond this cycle, but blaming the girls for dying to it helps nobody. We must instead learn to see why they were swallowed up by the old house and recognize ourselves in the same morality play.

I can recommend watching it, but only if you have a stomach for some out-there gore, silly special effects, idiosyncratic directing choices, and a critical eye. It is definitely the strangest film I’ve seen in years, and if you’re up for strange, you’re in for a treat. Just try not get too hungry.

#film #film criticism #house #hausu 1977 #house 1977 #patriarchy #feminism #horror

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atzfilm · 2 years

Text

as the world caves in (m); nine

pairing; hongjoong x reader, mingi x reader, ? x reader

word count; 4.8k

genre/warnings; fantasy-ish, apocalyptic au, angst, fluff, blood(a lot), weapons, fighting, injuries, zombies, knife, blood, miscommunication, bullying

summary; a mysterious virus has taken over the world, resulting in the undead and the new ‘eden race’ of humans. desperately trying to find your brother jongho with your friends, you stumble across another group in an abandoned hospital tent. strangely, they’re looking for him as well.

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Chapter 9:

"I thought you might like to stay in your brother's old room," Yeosang says, pushing you along the dirt path. "It's smaller than all of ours but a lot of his belongings are still in there. He left with little. None of us had the heart to go and look through his things. Pretty sure there's a thick layer of dust over everything."

"Sounds good to me," you say, hands wrapped around your body, just above the bandage. You're still a bit weary about Yeosang and the others. There's little that you know about any of them, but in order to gain their trust you have to play by their rules just a little. Enough for them to see that you're not going to run away. The suspicion hasn't subsided at all, especially with the way they tip toe around issues and questions that any of you bring up. You told Hongjoong you trust Yeosang more than him, but that was a blatant lie. Despite all of his faults, he’s your best friend. And nothing is going to change that.

"Is everything okay?"

You furrow your brows at his question, angling your head to look at him. He has the same blank stare on his face, lip twitching slightly when his eyes meet yours. Yeosang has always acted indifferent to anything having to do with you. Especially feelings. It bothers you to the point where you can't quite hold in your annoyance.

"You don't have to pretend to care about me Yeosang,” you say, looking away from him. “You guys want information about my brother and we do too. There’s no reason to try and feign a whole lie about how you like us or anything like that. We’re all adults here, let’s stop playing around.”

“Oh?” You don’t see his face, but you know he’s raising his brows. “I didn’t expect a whole tirade about how much you hate us.”

“I didn’t even say that.”

“Yea, but like you said, we’re adults. I can read between the lines,” Yeosang rolls you along the path, a bit more to go to the house. “We don’t hate you, y/n. There’s just some things you don’t share with strangers. You haven’t even seen Jongho in years, he could’ve changed in that time away. The same Jongho that you knew is completely different from the one we did. Disasters like this change people. And by the way, I’m not pretending to care. Perhaps in that little mind of yours, you’d ought to realize that I actually do.”

Neither of you say much more, Yeosang lifting you up the steps and into the farmhouse. It’s eerily quiet inside, a disassembled gun sitting on the kitchen table. He places you next to it, explaining that he’d be back once he gets your wheelchair. You adjust yourself in the chair, eyes on the gun. The only one that your crew has ever had was the one that Woo carries; he rarely uses it, and there’s only a few rounds left before you run out. So seeing their weapons in much better care compared to Wooyoung fascinates you. Yunho’s father must have stockpiled tons of artillery and ammunition to have weapons this… advanced, for lack of a better word. They’re almost military style compared to the others you’ve seen.

“Time away from daddy?”

You turn around, seeing Seonghwa enter the room. He steps around you, grabbing a gun off the table. He tucks it into his side, humming softly. Seonghwa is wearing the same outfit as before, without all of the embellishments that protected him from the Sick. “Or did he decide to kick you out?”

“Not my dad, asshole,” you retort, rolling your eyes. He scoffs.

“Better go and tell him that.”

“No need to act like a dirtbag, Hwa,” Another person enters the room, this time Mingi. He gives you a tight smile. “Sorry about that. We aren’t too used to anyone else sleeping around here. Although you did do that for a while…” he trails off, rubbing the back of his head. He’s in a pair of loose shorts and a rather tight shirt clinging to his body. It leaves nothing to the imagination, your eyes moving away from him. “But you get it.” He opens the fridge, grabbing a glass bottle. He passes one to you, and you thank him silently.

“There are rules that you need to know before you decide to stay in our house,” Seonghwa starts, sitting on the opposite end of the table. “First–”

“–is to let her sleep,” Yeosang enters the room, frowning. “We said we’d discuss everything tomorrow. One night of sleep is all Yunho asked for.”

Seonghwa sighs, flicking a piece of dust off his pants. Mingi downs his water, the room engulfed in silence. The uncomfortable air surrounds the four of you, much of it from the man across from you, eyes on yours as he glares. You knew that Seonghwa didn’t like you much, but the pure distaste isn’t what you expected. Actually, you assumed that Mingi or Yeosang would be that archetype. Mingi somehow flipped a switch, and Yeosang is sort of neutral.

“I don’t like you here,” Seonghwa says simply, as Yeosang wraps his arms around your legs and torso, lifting you with ease. “The quicker you leave the better.”

“Fuck off, Hwa,” Mingi hisses, grabbing your wheelchair. “Go have a pissy fit somewhere else.”

“Watch your tone,” he says simply. Mingi grips the chair tightly, but doesn’t respond.

Yeosang sighs, looking down at you. “An unusual Friday night in this house,” he murmurs, taking you up the stairs.

You look at Seonghwa just as you disappear around the corner, his eyes staring into yours. You could tell he was furious, jaw clenched. Yeosang takes his time making his way up the stairs, making sure not to go too fast or hold your waist too tightly. He turns into the room, Mingi close behind the both of you. He places you on the edge of the bed, taking a step back. Your eyes roam around, taking in everything. Mingi puts the wheelchair next to your side, clearing his throat.

“It’s not much, and Jongho didn’t do that much with it either, but I think it’ll be enough for you to stay in for a while,” Yeosang says, resting against the door frame. “We’ll leave you to it.” He leaves first, Mingi lingering around the door. Before he steps out, you call out to him. He spins on his heel.

“Hm?”

“It's about my brother. you said you two were close,” you say, fingers digging into the sheets. It’s odd that the room still has his familiar scent around, a quiet confirmation that he did spend his time in here. “Was he okay? I mean, as much as he could be?”

“Honest answer?” Mingi sighs. “Not really. I didn’t know at the time, but he was always stuck in his head. He joked around and spoke with us, but he kept to himself. I thought it was just because he might’ve been introverted, but Yeosang is and he doesn’t act that way. That closed off. We couldn’t figure out why he was that way, but I didn’t say much because I didn’t want to upset him. But he was a good guy. You would’ve been proud of him.”

Your eyebrows furrow. “Why are you speaking about him in past tense? He isn’t dead, Mingi.”

His eyes widened at that, shaking his head quickly. “Ah, no! I know he’s not. Just using it in reference to him being here, nothing more.” You don’t trust any of them, but you feel like Mingi wouldn’t lie to you. The switch in the past week from the anger that he used to you, to now, the comfort is neck-breaking. “I know you have no reason to believe us, but I’m telling the truth. He’s not dead, y/n. If you can’t trust anything else I say, at least attempt to trust that. Jongho wouldn’t die that easily, especially when he was desperately trying to look for his sister.” Mingi goes to the top drawer of the dresser in front of you, taking out an envelope. “The others don’t come in here often, but I do. And I found this the other day. Finally have the chance to give it to you.” He passes you the papers. “I’ll leave you alone, goodnight y/n.”

"What is it?" You ask, and he shakes his head.

"It's better to read it yourself."

“Oh," you grip the paper. "Goodnight, Mingi.”

He nods, a small smile decorating his lips. He leaves the room, shutting the door quietly behind him. You grip the paper between your fingers. The envelope is already ripped open, so you peek inside. You flick on the side lamp, lying back on the bed to see the paper clearly.

Mingi rests his head on his arm, throwing a ball into the air as he hums to himself. The night feels quieter than usual, Yunho’s music player silent. Usually there’s a bit of talking back and forth through the hallways, laughter just outside his door. But there’s nothing tonight. Not even the incessant crickets that scream outside his window make a sound. He rolls onto his side, sighing softly. Yunho would kick him out for that letter he gave you, but you’re in Jongho’s room. They’ve already scavenged through it before you slept in there, in case there was a hint of their past between letters. Mingi hid it in his pockets from the others, leaving it for you to find. He’s ashamed of what he was, of what he was forced into. He doesn’t feel that it’s right to hide a letter clearly addressed to you, Jongho’s sister. They might kick him out over this if you mention that he gave it to you. But that was a risk he was willing to take.

To absolve him of his sins, of his faults? Maybe.

He just knows that if he had the chance to talk to one of his family members again, to see their words written on an old piece of paper, he’d jump at it. Who are they to prevent you from doing that?

You sit straight up on your bed, unable to get a wink of sleep the night before. Your lids are heavy as you stare out at the barn. Wondering how exactly you’re going to warn the others of what Jongho wrote to you.

If you ever come across this paper in your hands y/n, if you ever meet any of them, run.

Your chest tightens, paper tucked into your pocket.

Run as far and fast as you can away from them.

Why the hell did Mingi give you that? Did he read it? No, he had to have read it. That’s why it was ripped open. It’s likely that all of them have read it. But why would they keep it in here, why would Mingi hand deliver the note that incriminates him? Incriminate all of them? Jongho didn’t get into detail about their past, but he said that he found out something that made him want to run. What exactly, you have no idea. It couldn’t be anything related to eating people - all of the food you’ve been given here has been fruits and vegetables. And you’re sure Jongho would’ve figured out something like that from the beginning. No one sticks around for five years without having a clue about it.

But what are they hiding?

You want to run, you do. You trust everything your brother could ever say to you. And curiosity has killed the cat more often than not. But… what did he find out? What does he know that you don’t?

You have to speak to the others about it. Sooner rather than later. No matter how much thinking about Hongjoong leaves a bad taste in your mouth, at the end of the day he’s your family. You can push aside your differences for a moment to figure out what’s going on at this farm. San and Wooyoung move immediately on things like this. They’d probably figure out a plan much quicker than you ever could.

A soft knock pulls you out of your thoughts. You tell them to come in. Yunho stands on the opposite side, holding open the door with his hand. He’s in working clothes, probably on his way out to the fields for the morning. It’s covered in stains and pebbles, a bit of it falling to the floor as he stands there. You wrinkle your nose, but don’t say a word. It’s best not to upset him, especially with the explicit warnings you were given.

“Had a good rest?” He asks, and you frown.

“Not exactly. But I’ll get used to it eventually. Beds are something to get used to when you’ve been sleeping on hardwood floors or dirt for years. I think my back might be out of alignment,” you rub it for exaggeration, and he chuckles.

“Hopefully you get used to it soon since you’ll be here for a while. Seonghwa made breakfast a few hours ago. It’s a bit cold now though, you might not want it.”

“Yunho,” you deadpan. “Have you forgotten that we’ve been on the road for years? I can handle a bit of lukewarm food. Thank you.”

He helps you out of the room, ignoring your protests when he lifts you from your bed and carries you to the bathroom. He waits outside patiently, then carries you down the stairs. You’re sure he hasn’t suspected a thing from you. He places you at the table as you thank him. Yeosang passes you a plate.

"In a better mood today?" You ask.

"In comparison to what?"

"Every other day." You nonchalantly glance around the room. Mingi isn't anywhere to be found, and you don't hear his boisterous voice through the hallways. “Where’s everyone else?”

“I’m eating, Seonghwa is out at the farmhouse speaking with your friends. And Mingi should be-”

“Right here!” The door swings open, violently. In comes said man, holding a large basket of fruits and veggies. He drops it on the floor, a loud boom echoing around the area. Yeosang sighs but doesn’t comment, Yunho glaring at him. “What?”

“Do you really have to be this loud on a Friday morning? It’s barely past dawn,” Yeosang complains. Yunho leaves the three of you alone, walking out the front door and shutting it behind him. Lightly. Knowing what you know, you feel uncomfortable being alone with any of them, but at least there’s more than one. You’d rather have someone from your group with you, but you’ll take what you can get. You adjust yourself in your chair, looking down at the food.

“Hey Yeosang,” you say, taking a bite of your food. “How do you know it’s Friday? I can’t even tell anymore.”

“He’s been tracking it since the beginning,” Mingi says, untying his shoes. “Told us that if we have nothing, at least we know what day it is.” he chuckles. “Not sure why we need to know that. I doubt anyone is going to be making calendars anytime soon.”

“Makes sense. We’ve lost pretty much anything, time is all that we can count,” you shrug, taking another bite. “By the way, Mingi, I don’t think I need that wheelchair anymore. How about you convince Yunho to pardon me and let me go?”

He snickers, “If you can walk from the table to the door without falling, then I’d approve of you walking on those two legs of yours again right away.”

“He doesn’t have the authority,” Yeosang adds from his spot, standing. “Mingi’s best friends with him, but he’s also the last to make decisions around here. Unless the three of us are incapacitated,” he glances at you, putting his plate in the sink. “And you’re not ready yet. There’s no rush, you can split those stitches open and have to start all over. Sure you don’t want that, yeah?”

“Right,” you murmur, holding a chopstick between your teeth. “Don’t wanna stay here longer than I have to.”

“You didn’t, don’t you remember?” Yeosang raises his brow, turning from scrubbing the dish to glance at you. “You told me that you wanted to hang out around here. And that means uninterrupted supervision by the big man himself. And he’s fond of you too much to see you hurt. So expect to be stuck in that wheelchair much longer than necessary, Tiger.” Sarcasm drips from his voice as he mentions your nickname.

“You never told us why Tiger,” Mingi mentions, throwing his shoes next to the door. He sits next to you, grabbing his plate of breakfast and swallowing it down immediately. His skin is covered in dirt and oils as you grimace, glancing at the dirt touching the table. “What?” he says, mouth full of food.

“Ever heard of washing your hands before eating?” You frown. He widens his eyes, quickly going over to the sink. Yeosang slides out of the way just in time, fingers pinching his nostrils when he gets a whiff of Mingi. “You alright?” you grin, wiggling your brows.

“Take a shower, now,” Yeosang kicks Mingi’s ass - literally, his foot planted in the middle of it - ushering him out of the room. “Being in the apocalypse doesn’t mean that we can go around smelling like shit. You didn’t smell that?” He turns to you, and you only laugh, taking another bite.

Yeosang leaves the kitchen soon after that. You watch him disappear around the corner, hearing a door close. You debate on walking around and peeking through cabinets, but the ache in your side stops you right as you stand. So you slump back into your chair, pushing the foot around your plate. What did Jongho see? It either took him five years to figure it out, or he stayed until he realized that he couldn’t take it anymore. But that’s not like him. It isn’t, and yet here you sit - probably in the same spot he once was. Trying desperately to figure out what he found out and quicker. Enough time for you to relay it back to your family and then get out of here.

“Still here?” You hear stomping from the stairs. It can only be one person, Mingi appearing from around the corner. He smiles at you, sitting back in his spot across from you. And then there’s Mingi. Staring at you, grinning. As if he didn’t give you a letter confessing that his group wasn’t safe.

Why did he give it to you?

“Mingi-”

“It’s a bit cold in here, isn’t it?” he asks, shivering slightly. “Want to go outside? I’m pretty much done with my food.” He doesn’t wait for you to say another word, grabbing the back of your chair. You pick up on what he’s trying to do, sliding into the wheelchair. He opens the front door, rolling you over the threshold. He doesn’t bother to take you out of the chair, lifting it with ease as he walks down the steps, placing you back on the ground. You’d stare in awe if you didn’t catch a glimpse of how tense he is, knuckles white as he grips the back of your chair. The two of you walk far away from the house, to the fields. You tense up, fingers digging into your jeans. You didn’t bring a weapon with you. He could do anything to you, in the middle of a field like this.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he starts, moving from behind you. He sits on the bale of hay in front of you, rolling his neck. “If I was going to do that, I would’ve done it already.”

“What do you want from me?” you ask, tone sharp. “Why did you bring me out here?”

“I want to know what you think.”

“Of the letter? I think I should be getting back to the farmhouse and taking my family with me. And never come back. That’s what I think,” you say, his expression dropping.

“So you will believe his words over mine?” he asks, and you scoff. Loudly.

“Are you trying to convince me not to trust my brother? Do you realize how stupid that sounds?”

“I didn’t have to give you that letter, you know. I could have kept it to myself. You’d never know what your brother thought of us.” Despite his harsh words, he only seems exhausted. Hand pulling on his hair, expression somber. “I wanted to explain some things before you assume the worst of us. Because we are not what he thought. He just found some things from our past that were… not the greatest.”

You stare at Mingi, fear creeping into you. His cryptic words only seem to make it worse. The whistle of the wind interrupts the two of you for a brief moment. All you can think of while staring at Mingi is his straightforward words about him.

Stay away from Mingi. Just because he’s good on the outside doesn’t make him that way on the inside.

“I think I should go,” you say, swallowing deeply. “See you?”

“You expect me to believe that you’ll just go back to the farmhouse and pretend nothing is going on?”

“Fuck no,” you snicker. “I expect you to know that I’ll be going back, telling the others about this gift you’ve given me, and leave. No turning back, no matter how close you were with Jongho. He doesn’t just… up and leave people like that. He trusted you enough to stay here that long. That means that you’ve hidden something unthinkable for him to leave. Just like that. I don’t trust you, Mingi. I don’t trust any of you. I… I was starting to, I have to admit,” you say after a moment. “But that was a foolish thing to do. I’ve realized that now. So just let me go. Please.”

“Can I explain it for just a bit, please?” He holds his hands together. “Please just give me this chance. Jongho didn’t let me, but I want you to understand. Clearly, why he left. And why you shouldn’t. Not yet, at least.”

You stare at him. He was an asshole in the beginning, but he’s changed since you’ve spent more time with him. Softened a lot more than before. So despite the very apparent red flags around him, you let him talk.

“He heard us talking one night when we thought he was awake,” Mingi starts, rubbing his pants. “It wasn’t anything too important, but it just slipped out around him.”

“Stop walking around the truth, Mingi. Just say it.”

“He heard us talking about our former positions in the government.”

Your heart drops. Without another word, you grip the wheels on your wheelchair, turning with ease.

“y/n wait!” You hear him stand. Knowing that you wouldn’t get far with rolling, you stand up. Your side immediately hurts as you walk swiftly to the barn. It’s just after sunrise, but you know the others are awake. It’s a habit to be up at daybreak. Ignoring Mingi’s yelling, you make your way up the path. A hand grips your wrist. You pull back, losing your balance and falling to the ground.

“Shit!” you cry out, landing on your barely healed wound. Mingi crouches down next to you, profuse apologies falling from his lips. You put your hand up, hearing the door swinging open behind you.

“What the fuck is going on - y/n?” Wooyoung’s familiar voice appears from behind you. You turn, his eyes wide as he flicks between the both of you. He stares at you, eyes narrowing. “Do I kill him?”

“No, no! It’s my fault I fell. We need to leave now,” you say as he jogs over, helping you to your feet. “Not tonight. Now. Are the others up?” You ask, and he nods quickly, lifting you with ease. Mingi stands there, not saying a word as Wooyoung carries you into the farmhouse, shutting the door behind him.

Hongjoong and San stand in the kitchen, speaking to one another. Their eyes flick to the both of you, smiles slipping. Wooyoung lightly places you on a chair, running up the steps without another word. San’s expression tightens as he follows him, not saying a word to you. It’s funny how all of you know what you’re thinking with just a look. Hongjoong quickly makes his way over to you, giving you a bit of space. You dig into your back pocket, pulling out the letter and handing it to him.

“What’s this?”

“Just read it, that’s better than explaining,” you say, slowly standing. His brows furrow but you wave him off. “Fine, I’m fine. I’ll pack up our things while you read.” You slide the weapons on the table into the duffle, leaving a few out.

“What did he find out?” Hongjoong says, fingers gripping the letter tightly. “Did you find out?”

“Mingi said they were part of the government. The fucking gov, Hongjoong!” You hiss, throwing the duffle over your shoulder. “No wonder this farm is equipped the way it is! I couldn’t believe that Yunho’s father made it right before the apocalypse hit, but it all makes sense now. The high tech weapons, the watch tours. The fucking gate wrapping around the property!” Your hands shake, desperate to control yourself. “We made a mistake staying here. Jongho was right to leave.”

“Fuck me,” Hongjoong rubs his face, deep in his thoughts. “Right under our noses, it was right in front of us.” he holds the letter in his hand, thinking. “Are they going to come in here knocking our doors down? They probably have surveillance in here, watching us this whole time. What the fuck were we thinking?” Hongjoong closes his eyes for a moment. “I already know Woo and San are grabbing our things. And we have keys for a few of the cars out there. Yunho said they were full tanks before, so I’m sure they still are. We can leave within the next fifteen. I’ll grab food for the road. y/n,” he turns to you. “I know you hate to be bossed around and we have a lot to speak about, but please don’t leave my sight. Not now.”

“I won’t,” your lips curve slightly. “I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid.”

He laughs dryly, jogging into the kitchen.

Mingi walks through the door, sighing softly. His eyes flick to the couch, Yeosang reading a book. He barely gives Mingi a glance, until Seonghwa clears his throat.

“Where’s y/n?” He asks, brows furrowed. “Did she want to stay out in the sun?”

“No,” he hesitates. Seonghwa immediately picks up on it, standing up. Yeosang lowers his book, glancing between the both of them. “It’s not that bad-”

“What did you do, Mingi?” Yeosang says simple, frowning. “What the hell did you do?”

He rubs his hands together, jaw tense. Seonghwa doesn’t say a word, running to the back to tell Yunho. Yeosang stands up from the couch, pushing past Mingi and entering the kitchen.

“You just had to tell them? You couldn’t help yourself? Couldn’t wait until they gave us enough information about Jongho? You fucked up, big time Song,” he grabs his guns off the table, tucking it into his pockets. “Do you realize what you’ve done? They’re going to leave, and we aren’t going to get anything from them. Not a word.”

“I thought she would let me explain-”

“Where are they now?” Yunho’s voice interrupts the conversation. He looks freshly showered, hair still dripping. He pushes the strands from his face, eyes on Mingi. “Have they already left the compound?”

“No, they’re still at the farmhouse. Packing up,” he adds, avoiding Yunho’s gaze. “I had to tell her, Yunho.”

“We go there without weapons. We speak to them clearly and precisely so they don’t believe that we’re up to something. We convince them to listen to our words so that they won’t leave. It’s that simple,” Yunho says, flicking his chin at Yeosang. Yeosang narrows his eyes, but he drops his weapons back to the table. “We fix it, and they stay longer.”

“What if they don’t agree?” Seonghwa asks. “You said no weapons, but-”

“There’s three of them, and four of us,” Yunho says. “She’s in no condition to do anything without straining herself. We will lock the three up, and keep her here. Let them go when we have enough information.”

‘We said we won’t do that anymore, Yunho,” Mingi says softly. “After we left, we said we’d never lock up another person again. We promised.”

“We did,” Yunho agrees, buttoning up his shirt. “And we weren’t going to do it again. We wouldn’t have to think of that possibility if you didn’t mess it up for us. In fact,” he thinks for a moment. “Stay here. You’ll interfere too much while we’re talking to them.”

“As much as I’d agree to that,” Yeosang says. “She doesn’t trust any of us, but she’s more lenient with Mingi. Him not being there will only force us to take Plan B.”

Yunho sighs, eyes on Mingi. “Mingi, if you so much as say another word to her, you’ll be locked up with them. Understood?”

“Yunho-”

Yunho’s hand grips his neck, slamming him against the brick fireplace. His grip is tight as he holds Mingi there, eyes furious. “We need this information, Mingi. We need to find Jongho. And if I have to break your legs to keep you from saying shit, I will. Now, do you understand me?”

He gasps, hands gripping Yunho’s one. “I understand.” He lets out. Yunho lets go, watching as Mingi falls to the floor.

“Good. Now let's go and convince our Tiger to stay a little longer.”

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after note: hii;; please leave feedback it motivates me :>

tags: @haechanniesunflowers @kpopnightingale @vanishingboots @moonctae @bangtanxberm @honeysbbae @havetaeminforbreakfast @mirror-juilet @knucklesdeepmingi @captainjoongiekissme @roroswitherose@a1sh1teruu @goldenstarmermaid @meowsannie (?) @atinytease

#fic: atwci #hongjoong x reader #mingi x reader #yeosang x reader #seonghwa x reader #wooyoung x reader #san x reader #yunho x reader #jongho x reader #ateez fic #ateez smut #ateez angst #eeee !!

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