#potato farmer Technoblade
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I’m a Farmer, Not a Babysitter (oops)
Day Two: Potato Farmer Technoblade! He’s certainly a dude!
I ended up with two stories I couldn’t pick from in the thirty minutes, so here they are!
Farmer Techno (tw: Wilbur is dead)
"This is about Wilbur?" Technoblade asks.
"Yes," the social worker says, "We've tried to get in contact with your father, but we couldn't reach him."
"What's wrong?"
"We do our best to keep families together, Mr. Craft," the woman says, "We wanted to see if Philza has any interest in taking custody of Fundy, as his mother has denied it."
"Who?" Techno asks, and the phone is silent for a beat too long.
"Wilbur Soot's son?"
Techno bluescreens/
"Wilbur doesn't have a son," he says, but really he wouldn't know. Wilbur wasn't exactly showing up to the family reunions. Neither was Techno, for that matter.
"He did," the woman says, and that's that.
---
The farm isn't really suited for a kid.
There's dangerous experiment around every corner, and the chickens have already tried to peck Fundy to death, sniffing the fox under his skin. Fundy, still the weirdest kid Techno's ever met, decided he loved them almost immediately after that, and he hasn't stopped trying to break into the coop since.
Technoblade's lucky that Ranboo was looking to take more hours around the farm, milking the cows and mucking the stables and tending the crops more in that first week than he probably ever has in his life.
Fundy isn't old enough for him to leave unsupervised, especially since he's prone to turning into a fox and squirming through the hole under the baseboards in the kitchen like a snake.
Ranboo's a godsend those first few weeks, taking up the bulk of the labor around the farm and still making time to entertain Fundy for a few hours while Techno makes dinner and tries to figure out what the hell he's supposed to do now.
He's not a dad, and he never wanted to be one. There's a reason his only contact with kids was the schoolkids who came by to milk cows twice a month.
Fundy needs so much that Techno just doesn't know how to provide. He cries, sometimes, and Techno tries to comfort him as best as he can. He makes Fundy's room the safest space in the house and fills it with everything Fundy wants, from toys he saw on their four-channel-television, to photos of the parents he'll never see again.
It gets easier as the weeks draw on and Fundy talks to him more, tells him stories about his life with Wilbur before they lost everything. Techno listens, comforts when he needs to, and does his best to make his house a home.
But, as the month draws to a close, the summer slipping by in a blur of grief and fireworks, Techno's reminded that he's going to have to get back to the farm. Ranboo has school and, even if he didn't, Techno feels awful seeing how exhausted he is at the end of the day.
The farm's a big job, especially for a high schooler.
If Ranboo were any less worried about being alone with Fundy, he'd probably ask him to babysit instead.
As it is, Techno has to scour the area for anyone who would be willing to watch a hybrid kid on the outskirts of the city.
The first person he considers, a florist named Hannah, can't be away from the city for as long as he needs.
The next spends way too long comparing Fundy to the kind of foxes she shoots in the autumn for Techno to anything but throw her out of the house.
By the time he's met his fifteenth option, Technoblade has almost given up.
He asks Ranboo, just to see, if he knows anyone who'd be willing to watch a hybrid.
The next day, Technoblade has the most intense interview of his life.
…
Tommy hits it off with Fundy immediately.
In the thirty minutes he spends answering questions, Fundy's already declared him his uncle twice. It's an improvement, from the last sitter he tried to bite no less than four times.
…
Technoblade is pretty sure that Tommy isn't human.
He doesn't know how to bring it up, but his chickens have some sort of sixth sense for these things and they guard their eggs around Tommy like he's bound to snatch them up.
…
Tommy slots himself into their lives like he was always there.
Techno thinks that, if he were here, Wilbur would have called Tommy his little brother.
Instead, Technoblade calls him Theseus.
Instead, Technoblade sets up the third room for when Tommy doesn't want to bother heading back into the city.
Instead, Technoblade welcomes him home.
.
.
Fundy Thievery (tw: sad boi hours)
Two hours in and Fundy has to concede that it really *is* just a farm.
There's no secret room full of Wither skulls, or a chest full of weapons and totems.
There's a few hundred full of potatoes, though. Fundy grabs a few stacks to squirrel back to his den, the crow looking at him judgmentally.
Fundy flicks it off. It chortles, a mocking laugh, and settles into his hair.
When he reaches the treeline, the bird finally fucks off back to its nest, not following him home like he'd worried it might.
…
Fundy comes back the next day.
He doesn't want to. He wouldn't if he could avoid it, but he knows Techno has health pots somewhere and his arm still won't bend the way he needs it to.
He'd tried to shift only once, but he's pretty sure that only made it worse, a screaming pain from his elbow to his wrist.
So, stealing from his sort-of-uncle it is.
He's just lucky the dogs don't lunge for him, and that the crows seem content to keep their silence.
At least, no one's come tearing into his den with an axe, so he figures they haven't said anything, to Philza or to Techno.
#firsttrytechnochallenge#technoblade#ctechno#c!techno#fundy#c!fundy#dsmp fundy#dsmp techno#fanfic#dsmp fanfic#writing#my writing#30 minute challenge#tw dead wilbur soot#dead wilbur soot#kid fundy#kid!fundy#uncle technoblade#farmer technoblade#potato farmer technoblade
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08-02-2023: Day 2 submission for the First Try Techno challenge! I got Potato Farmer Techno! Here he is, as a baby starting out, and in casual wear!
As with all my First Try art, I’ve traced the posing to work on getting a feel for anatomy!
The pose for babey cam from this Tumblr post from @nightmargin
And the pose for casual wear came from this Twitter post from @Shmeckdoesstuff
#firsttrytechnochallenge#technofanart#Technoblade#techno fanart#dsmp techno#dsmp#dsmp fanart#30 minute sketch#30 minute challenge#potato farmer Technoblade#artists on tumblr#ctechno#c!techno#kid Technoblade#kid!technoblade
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Not me re-watching Potato War for the millionth time because of content deprivation, also happy birthday to our boi🎉
#Farmer Techno my beloved#i miss technoblade#technoblade fanart#technoblade#techno#techno fanart#dsmp#dream smp#dream smp fanart#dsmp fanart#mcyt#mcyt fanart#Potato war#fan art#my art
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A humble potato farmer
#technoblade#technofanart#art#technoblade never dies#technoblade number 1 potato farmer#technoblade potato farmer#potato war#potatowar#technoblade potato war
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A redraw from like 2020(?) I love this
#technoblade#clip studio paint#redraw#there is so much maturity going on here#i love this so so so much#my fav headcanon is since hes a potatoe farmer he cooks#ya know?#i miss him#myct fanart
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RIP
#technoblade#rest in peace#technoblade never dies#i miss technoblade#technofanart#artsists on tumblr#digital drawing#art#fuck cancer#rip technoblade#the man the myth the legend#humble potato farmer#fanart#heaven has gained another angle
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As of one hour ago now
Technoblade has passed away
But even now that he is gone, technoblade never dies as now he lives in all of us, his fans and friends
At this time, it is important to respect the family, not hound them with questions, after all they've just lost a son.
May he rest in peace
"You were good son real good, maybe even the best"
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Whilst doing some unnecessary research for my latest fic (The Potato Farmer and the Ouija Bard, check it out), I uncovered some fun facts about early carrot and potato farming in Europe. I think this should be considered when writing all of the DSMP farming stories from now on.
"Pastinaca is called…in englishe a Carot…Carettes growe in al countreis in plentie."
“Potatoes; these were the most delicate rootes that may be eaten, and doe far exceede their passeneps or carets."
“The sweet potato, observed Sir Joseph Banks, was used as a delicacy long before the introduction of our potatoes. It was imported from Spain and the Canaries, and was supposed to "restore decayed vigour" (no prizes for guessing what that means).“
#potatos#potato farming#carrots#carrot farming#dsmp#dsmp fanfiction#mcyt fanfiction#farmer technoblade
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This has been rattling in my mind for a minute and i need to scream about it.
The significance of the item display of the backpacks and how much that defines the QSMP characters.
If you dont know, Leo found out you can display an item in your backpack and show it off. Kinda like a little charm or a keychain. Ever since then, a bunch of people have been displaying items.
Lets start off with the trend setter.
Leo:
Her item is a totem. Obviously this is about Foolish. She spends the most time with Foolish and adores him. They are super close and are super similar. Another reason could be showing off her wealth. Also, a joke that she is immortal (she isnt) and its a bit of a hint to that.
Foolish:
His item is the player head that Leo always wears. Obviously, like Leo, it represents how much he loves Leo and the time they spent together. It also looks like Leo is in his backpack and showing that they are always together (Siempre juntos) no matter what.
Philza:
His item is a skull you can wear on your head. Now theres a lot to interpet here. The obvious one is that this represents Missa. Either that he always chooses Missa or that Missa is with him and Chayanne even if hes away. Again theres a lot to talk about.
Another reason is that death isnt scary for him / death is always there. Philza in general is associated with death (his irl wife's lore is being the goddess of death). With his son on one life for so long and now his granddaughter, he has come to terms with death. He isnt scared of the Code Monster. He will fight until the death no matter what.
Tallulah:
Her item is a poppy. I believe she gives poppies to people she meets for the first time. For me, it represents her innocence. In the way she views the world and how the world views her. Everyone sees her as a sweet girl and is super kind. Majority, if not everyone, always loves her. For her, she always views the world with love. She is told by Wilbur and Phil that her kindness and love is necessary. In a world full of terror and fear, there needs to be love and gentleness
Chayanne:
His item is a potato. For anyone who doesnt know, Chayanne is deeply inspired by Techoblade. Technoblade is known for being a incredible warrior and a great Potato farmer. Please look up his videos. Philza told Chayanne about Techno and again is deeply inspired by him. The potato is a reminder of Chayanne's goals. To help everyone and to protect everyone.
Richarlyson:
His item is a heart container, one used to get an extra heart of health. I have so many emotions about this. I think the main one is that Richarlyson is the heart of the Brazilians / Favela Five. He is the core, for better or for worse. He always loves all his dads. Even recently with how scary everything is, he still loves and trusts his dads.
Forever:
His item is a Nether star. I honestly feel like this defines his character so well. An item that takes a lot of time, resources, and strength to get. Forever has put in that time and effort. His strength shines in his armor and how persistent he is. Also, the nether star is needed to make the highest level of the block reinforcer. Its needed to make everything safe. Forever has shown that over and over again. He wants to make everything safe.
(Update, Richarlyson changed his to a nether star so him and Forever are matching!)
Cellbit:
His item is the universal block remover. I dont know how recent this change is, but I noticed it when he was in his federation office. Just like Forever, this defines his character so well. He is there to break something, either the Enigma or the Federation. He is trying to get inside.
BadBoyHalo:
His item is a Scythe. For anyone who doesnt know, Bad said he is the grim reaper. Either coming to people to remind them to drink water or that he helps guide people to the afterlife. A lot of people thinks that why he cares so much about the eggs. He is the one to transport them to the afterlife.
Mike:
As im making this post, Tazercraft went live and I noticed Mike has a red block in his item display. I dont know a lot of Tazercraft/ Mike's lore. I do know that in tazercraft's game of hide and seek, a red block is represented to show who is the seeker/killer. Maybe it relates to that?
This is everyone I can think of off the top of my head. Theres probably more people who have it, but yeah.
#qsmp#qsmp philza#qsmp forever#qsmp badboyhalo#qsmp cellbit#qsmp chayanne#qsmp foolish#qsmp leonarda#qsmp richarlyson#qsmp mike#qsmp tazercraft#qsmp tallulah
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okay I didn’t think I’d have to pull out my bribe this early, but…
hello dsmp fans. it’s been a while, right? I haven’t published a dsmp fic in… ages. I also haven’t written techno in a very long time and I miss writing him, man, I miss it. I have one last techno fic idea in me. it’s a story in which he’s an old, dethroned god who has retired to farm potatoes and argue with squid at the farmer’s market, but gets pulled back into one final grand adventure when a young man realizes who he is and begs him to help him rescue his brother, wilbur. it has all the tropes I’d want to send off - SBI! techno and squid’s rivalry! technically some superpower stuff! urban fantasy! niki is really cool in this one!
so, here’s the bargain I have for you: if you get joe hills to the semifinals (where he’ll likely face cleo), I’ll write it. that’s as far as you need to get him; I’m not asking for the finals, just the semis. and once you do that, I’ll write it.
that’s right. it’s bumped up the list to my next project. one last return from the author of black box to a technoblade fic. that’s the bribe I have on the table for you. so before you vote wilbur soot, please just… consider what you’re giving up, by making that choice.
alright? alright.
#mcytblr sexyman#joehillssweep#make the right choice.#also if you have more dsmp followers than me feel free to spread this offer to them as propaganda#I didn’t expect to have to pull it out this early. but the better it circulates the better it may do.
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the potato shortage in the afterlife was so bad that they needed to get the best farmer out there, huh... rest in peace, technoblade. you're part of a myth, a legend, and we'll make sure your name lives on. thank you for making my life better. i'm wishing your family, friends and community my most sincere and pain-induced condolences.
in these hard times, remember not only to take care of yourselves, but also that technoblade never dies.
#i have been. trembling and crying nonstop since ive heard about it.#guess we wont have our bedrock bros reconciliation after all haha (im in pain. im trying to cope. please be patient with me.)#technoblade#dsmp#dream smp#mcyt
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ID: a drawing of Dream and Technoblade. Dream is holding a wither rose and asking "These are your favorites, right?"
So @simplepotatofarmer is hosting a 4k followers event and I wanted to participate! It's quite simple really (like the potato farmer), we just make techno art and they'll give us freshly baked yeasty delicious fics based on it!
(Feel free to repost this with your fic btw)
I'm quite proud of coming up with this tbh, it could mean a lot of things, lol
Potential ideas for it that you may or may not want to use, so I'm leaving them under the cut:
-cutesy gift giving
-angsty realisation that everybody sees techno as a monster, to the point they think even his favorite goddam flower is a weapon of destruction
-techno's affinity with withers through his life
-dream slowly coming out of his shell and trying his best
-dream's self harming tendencies fresh out of prison (you didn't have to grab it, dude)
Given your and dreblr's track record, I do think this is gonna be angsty ahah.
For everyone else, feel absolutely free to use that prompt too! Just please tag or send it to me I really want to read it.
Also.
#dreamwastaken#Technoblade#hey loyal write this#rivalsduo#dreamnoblade#i mean nobody has to make it /r if they don't want to but thats also an option yaknow? ...jus sayin#rivalstwt#dream#klm-zoflorr#top tag#my art#art#dream fanart#technoblade fanart#rivalsblr#animation#ngl uhhhhhh i feel iffy about this. blocky lineart... not really my thing? like it works for animations#but with my shading not sure
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for @tea-with-veth ‘s sing a song of sixpence, featuring potato farmer/general cottagecore guy technoblade and philza, who is definitely not supposed to be a crow
#technoblade#philza#fanart#mcyt#techno fanart#philza fanart#technoblade fanart#dreamsmp#dsmp fanart#mcyt fanart
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when i first got into mcyt, i thought technoblade was legit an ex-potato farmer irl, who retired from the farm to try out being a minecraft youtuber
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my brother and i have just come to a very important realization.
technoblade, after a fierce nine-month long battle against his formidable foe im_a_squid_kid, emerged victorious as the #1 potato farmer in hypixel. to this day, he is widely regarded as the greatest potato farmer in all of minecraft.
mark watney, protagonist of the novel The Martian by Andy Weir, survives on mars because he is able to use his botany skills to grow potato plants in martian soil. he is the only person to have ever grown potatoes on mars, therefore, he is the #1 potato farmer on mars.
this can only mean one thing.
mark watney is space technoblade.
#the martian#mark watney#andy weir#technoblade#potato war#thank you for coming to my ted talk#gold star#reblogs#thunder talks
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Image description: A digital painting of Technoblade and his Origins SMP counterpart, Bunnyblade. They're walking across a potato field, with Bunnyblade riding in the wheelbarrow Technoblade is pushing. Technoblade doesn't have his crown on.
There are other farmers behind them, some of them looking up at the dragon soaring across the sky. Bunnyblade is saying, "You're the weirdest player I know. You could take over the world, but instead you... farm potatoes.” End of image description.
reluctant partner
#fgh art#fanart#mcyt#origins smp#hypixel#the great potato war#technoblade#bunnyblade#illustration#rebelle 5
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