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daysofyellowroses · 2 months

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carmen berzatto x afab!reader | 7.9k | based on this wonderful request by @kpopgirlbtssvt (sincere apologies this took so long!) | 18+ minors dni | warnings: smut, mentions of abuse, shitty shitty behaviour, language

finally finally finally i am posting this! it was not intended to be so long but i couldn't bring myself to end it, then life and work got busy and long story short, here it is! i have more requests to get working on, but i have a week off from today so hopefully no more delays! 🌼💗🫶🏻

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“I can do this, I can totally do this.”

You repeated the words to yourself over and over, looking at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. It was just a job interview, it wasn't like you were going into battle or something. Still, that thought didn't ease the knot in your stomach. Job interviews were always nerve-wracking, it was just the nature of them. You'd lost track of how many you'd been on, they all started to blur together. Some of the jobs weren't even really what you wanted, but you needed something new. Your notice was burning a hole in your pocket, just waiting to be handed in.

You stepped back from the mirror, taking a deep breath. Your outfit looked professional, you felt. A white shirt and navy pants, simple but effective. You forced yourself to smile, to try and feel more relaxed. The world wouldn't end, you still had a job, technically, had a roof over your head. A new roof, a new life. Now you just needed a new job and it would all fall into place.

Heading into your bedroom, you checked your phone to see which interview it was, your calendar flooded with notices. The latest was a hostess job for the Bear, a newly opened restaurant. You'd been a little surprised to get a call for an interview, while you had worked in a restaurant before it was a couple of years ago and you'd worked there for less than a year. Still, an interview was an interview, and you wouldn't be too down if you didn't get it.

When you arrived at the restaurant, you wondered if you'd gone to the right address. In theory it looked like a restaurant, but there was still a whole lot of construction work going on. You wondered how soon the soon-to-be-open was exactly. Heading inside, you raised a brow at how much work was being done, an interview on a construction site would be a new experience for sure.

After a moment, a blonde woman walked through one of the open doorways, picking her way across the floor to you. She seemed to be heavily pregnant, but it didn't stop her weaving through the room with ease.

“Hi, sorry to keep you waiting,” She smiled as she approached you. “I'm Natalie, one of the managers here. You must be my ten o'clock interview, come on in.”

She led you to a table that had been laid out how you imagined all the tables would eventually look, with its elegant wine glasses and luxurious napkins and cutlery. There were, you noticed, three chairs across the table from you, your heart beating a little faster. You didn't mind interviews but when there were three or four people talking to you at once it could be a little intense.

You gave her your details and placed your purse on the back of your chair, taking a deep breath.

“Great,” Natalie smiled, placing the copy of your resume that you had given her on the table. “I'm just waiting for-”

“I'm here,” A voice called from across the room. “Sorry I'm late.”

You looked over, finding a tall man in a dark suit walking over to the table. He looked about mid-40s, piercing blue,eyes, pretty attractive but not necessarily your type. Not that it mattered, you told yourself. Finding your boss attractive hadn't been great for you historically.

The man introduced himself and you did the same, sitting up a little as he sat down beside Natalie.

“Are Carm and Sydney coming to this one?” Natalie asked Richie, quietly. “They said they would.”

“Said they'd try,” Richie replied, looking over to you with a polite smile. “But let's get started shall we?”

“Absolutely.” You nodded with a smile, taking a deep breath.

“Well let's tell you a little bit about us,” Natalie smiled. “As you can see we're still in the renovation stage, but we're close to the end now. We were a sandwich shop before but now we're moving to a more high end operation, which we're all very excited about. It's a great team we have here, and we're looking forward to building on what we already have.”

“That sounds great,” You smiled, glancing down to the table for a moment to gather your thoughts before looking back up. “I'm used to working as part of a strong team, so that wouldn't be a problem.”

“Excellent,” Natalie nodded, looking at your resume for a moment before looking over to Richie. “Well Richie here is our front of house manager so I'll let him fill you in on what we would expect from you.”

Richie nodded, looking over to you and you felt your heart race a little. For good or bad you weren't sure, but you decided to roll with it.

“As Natalie said we're going to be a high end operation,” Richie began, his gaze burning into you. “What does that mean to you?”

You thought about it for a moment, adjusting the napkin in front of you before looking back at Richie.

“To me it means excellent food, a comfortable and relaxed atmosphere, and a strong focus on customer service.”

Richie was quiet for a moment and you found yourself questioning your answer.

“Good,” Richie nodded, sitting back a little. “Now..”

It was fifteen or so minutes later when the door to the restaurant opened. Richie and Natalie both glanced over and you paused what you were saying. After a moment they looked back at you and you kept going, a man about your age coming over to the table and sitting in the empty chair beside Natalie. He gave you a polite smile and you felt your heart race in a way you knew definitely wasn't good but in the best possible way.

“Apologies for my brother's lateness,” Natalie sighed softly, gesturing to the man beside her. “This is Carmy, he's the head chef.”

He smiled as he held his hand out to you and it took you a second to remember your own name. You shook his had, trying to ignore the spark that shot through you.

The rest of the interview felt like a blur, before you knew it you were saying your goodbyes and heading out. You had no idea if you had actually done well or not, with every other interview you'd had some idea but you were honestly clueless with this one.

It was a couple of days later when you got a phone call. You had just gotten out of the shower when your phone rang, you could hear it from your bedroom and quickly threw a towel around yourself before heading into your bedroom. You didn't have time to check the ID before answering your phone, clutching your towel around yourself.

“Hello?”

“Hi, sorry to call so early.”

You vaguely recognised the voice, running through possible options in your head before it dawned on you.

“Uh..no, no it's fine,” You nodded, sitting on the edge of your bed. “Don't worry.”

“Great,” Carmy replied. “I wanted to thank you for coming in the other day, we had a lot of interviews..”

You took a deep breath as you braced yourself for rejection. It wouldn't be the worst thing, but it still always felt a little deflating to be told you weren't good enough.

“..and I wanted to let you know that we would love to have you on board, if you're still interested?”

Your heart flew into your mouth, your mind unable to process an answer for a moment.

“I..yes, yes I'm still interested,” You nodded, a smile breaking out on your face. “That's amazing, thank you so much.”

“My pleasure,” Carmy's voice sounded low in your ear and you found yourself clutching your towel tighter. “I know you have to work out your notice in your current job but whenever you're free to start, we'll be here.”

“Oh, great,” You murmured, cursing yourself for sounding so dazed. “I'll hand my notice in today, and..I'll keep you updated. Thank you so much.”

“Don't mention it, I'll talk to you soon okay?”

“Okay,” You nodded, saying your goodbyes before ending the call and sitting on your bed for a while longer to process what had happened. It was a weight off your shoulders, of course, but you still had a nervous excitement about it.

The two weeks you had to finish out seemed to pass by in an instant. On your last day you were given a card and flowers, someone brought in a cake, and you found yourself wondering if anyone would even remember you in a week's time.

Then, before you knew it, you were getting ready to start your first shift at the Bear. It was the opening night, and you weren't sure if the nerves would ever end. The evening was all a blur, you felt like you were on autopilot, watching your own body in action. Richie took the helm much to your relief, and you just followed his lead. By the time you were putting your jacket on and getting ready to go home, you weren't sure you hadn't dreamed the whole thing.

The nerves really hit on your following shift. There wasn't the buzz of the opening night, the pressure that made you strangely calm. You spent a solid two hours getting ready, looking at yourself in the mirror for a ridiculously long time. Your dress felt too short, even with your dark tights. Your makeup felt like it was too much and not enough. Eventually you had to leave, and tried to push your insecurities aside before they drove you crazy.

You arrived at the restaurant just in time for the staff dinner, taking your seat and taking off your jacket. You felt too nervous to eat, even though the food looked incredible. Instead, you opted to take a sip of water, glancing up and finding Carmy looking at you. He looked away when you met his eyes and you slowly set your cup down, adjusting your dress under the table.

While you forced yourself to eat something, you looked over to Richie as he launched into a story, finding yourself relaxing slightly. You were sure you felt eyes on you, but when you glanced at Carmy he wasn't looking at you. After dinner, the nerves struck again as everyone got ready for the service. You hung back for a moment, taking a deep breath.

“Hey, feeling okay?”

You looked up and swallowed a breath as you saw Carmy walking over to you.

“Uh..yeah, yeah I'm good,” You nodded, clearing your throat. “Just the tiniest bit nervous. It's been a minute since I was in a job like this..I hope last night wasn't just a fluke.”

“It wasn't,” Carmy smiled, raising a brow. “Don't worry. You were great, really great. You can do this, just overthink it, alright?”

“Alright,” You smiled, feeling the knot in your stomach loosen slightly. “I won't.”

Service actually went well, at least for a while. You put on a mask of confidence and found yourself feeling better about your abilities as the evening went on. Until, that is, you were in the kitchen explaining an order update for a table when Richie burst in with a face like thunder and your stomach dropped.

“Hey,” He looked over to you and you already wanted the ground to open up and swallow you.

“Did you seat table nine?”

“I..yes, I did,” You nodded, wondering what exactly the problem was, nothing springing to mind. “Why? Should I..not have?”

Richie sighed and ran his hand over his face, while you felt like you were back in school about to be ripped apart by a teacher.

“You seated them,” Richie nodded, resting his hands on his hips. “Despite the fact that table nine is reserved for seven thirty, did you just decide not to do your job?”

“I..I'm so sorry,” You insisted, holding your hands up. “It was a mistake, I take complete responsibility for it, I'm so sorry.”

“You should be,” Richie sighed, shaking his head. “You made the mess, you clean it up. I can't fucking believe this.”

“I..” You stopped yourself as Richie held his hand up, trying to hold back your tears and cursing yourself for being so damn overly sensitive.

“No, you just need to stop,” Richie muttered. “I gotta think.”

You closed your eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, looking over your shoulder as you felt a hand on your back.

“Don't worry,” Carmy murmured softly, meeting your eyes. “he's just a drama queen. You can do this, don't panic.”

You felt more eyes on you, some of the other chefs looking at you with surprise before they got back to work.

“Alright,” You nodded, taking a deep breath before looking back at Richie.

“I'll handle it.”

You left the kitchen, holding your head up high and leaving the mask aside.

After service was over, you slipped out to the back and sat on a low wall before pulling a back of cigarettes from your purse. A moment later you let out a long exhale and felt your body relax.

“Mind if I bum one of those?”

“Of course,” You smiled, holding the packet out to Carmy as he walked towards you. “Go for it.”

“Thanks,” Carmy nodded, taking the pack. “Didn't have you pegged as a smoker. No offense.”

“None taken,” You smiled, wrapping your arm around yourself. “I don't smoke so much anymore, just after a tough day. Stress reliever.”

Carmy nodded as he lit up a cigarette, handing you back the packet. “I get you. But I should warn you this job will have you back smoking full time, nature of it and all.”

You nodded as you took a drag of your cigarette, watching Carmy sit down beside you.

“Thanks for the heads up..and I'm sorry again for tonight.”

Carmy shook his head, leaning forward and resting his arms on his knees.

“Don't apologize, honestly. It was an honest mistake, it all got resolved. Richie just needs to have a moment now and then. He'll apologize in a day or two.”

“Can't wait,” You laughed softly, flicking your cigarette by your feet. “I really thought he was gonna kill me at one point. If I'm still here in a month I'll be amazed.”

“You'll still be here,” Carmy nudged you gently. “If I have my way anyway. Don't let Richie get in your head. You're good at what you do, embrace it.”

“Are you a chef or a life coach?” You teased, smiling to yourself. “I just get a little too in my head sometimes, overthink things.”

“Well join the club,” Carmy laughed softly as he shook his head. “We're all guilty of that. You just gotta push past it, I guess.”

“Hm, has that ever worked for you?” You asked, looking over to Carmy.

“Honestly?” Carmy met your gaze, his cigarette between his lips and his eyes sincere. “Not even once.”

“Hm, I suspected as much,” You smiled, looking away. “easier said than done, right?”

“Right,” Carmy murmured. “So maybe we just tell each other when we're overthinking. Get the thoughts out.”

“That sounds great, in theory,” You raised a brow, looking up for a moment with a smile. “Guess we'll just have to see how it goes in practice.”

A month later, you had started to settle into your role more, getting more comfortable and confident. There were a couple of slip ups here and there, but you always seemed to have Carmy in your corner. You got better at handling problems, and gradually started to build a bond with Richie, who you grew a soft spot for.

One particular Saturday, there was a plan to go for drinks after work. You hadn't been planning to go, but figured it would be nice to spend some time with everyone outside of work, in your normal clothes and without only being able to speak in short bursts.

Well, you and Carmy did tend to spend some time after work having a cigarette, sometimes it was twenty minutes, sometimes it was an hour. At first you would just talk about work, about the night's service, any annoying customers, but gradually you started to learn more. You found that you enjoyed just listening to him talk, when he would tell you little snippets of his life. It was never too much, too detailed, but enough for you to piece together a more clear picture of his life. You shared some details of your life, never anything too much, but enough that he seemed interested, asking you more and more questions.

After service that Saturday, you felt like you could sleep for a week but everyone else's excitement gave you a buzz. You got changed in the bathroom, throwing on a pair of dark jeans and a simple red velvet top, stuffing your hostess dress into your bag. You felt more than ready for a drink, but there was one thing you had to do first.

“Didn't think you were coming out tonight.”

“For a drink or a smoke?” You asked, walking over to the wall and sitting beside Carmy. He was wearing jeans and a sweater but when you were so used to seeing him in his whites it made a difference.

“Either,” Carmy handed you a pack of cigarettes. “Not complaining though.”

“Didn't think you would,” You smiled, plucking a cigarette from the pack. “I told Syd I'd head to the bar in a few, they're all gonna go on ahead. Richie said first round on him.”

“I'll believe that when I see it,” Carmy scoffed, shaking his head. “What's your poison?”

“Arsenic,” You replied, looking over to Carm with a grin. “Ask an old question and get an old answer.”

“Alright, fair,” Carmy nodded, a smile on his face. “if I was to give you a drink right now what would you have?”

“Right now?” You looked up for a moment, thinking about it.

“Mm..probably like a whiskey sour.”

“You're such an old man,” Carm laughed as you rolled your eyes. “A whiskey sour?”

“It's a classic,” You lightly swatted his arm. “Don't knock it. We can't all be cool bros who drink fucking beer.”

“I never said I was having a beer,” Carmy raised a brow, holding his hand over his heart. “You're really gonna slap me with the bro label?”

“Yeah,” You nodded, taking a drag on your cigarette before looking over to Carm with a grin. “It's an old man's prerogative.”

You and Carm ended up arriving at the bar after everyone else had already finished half their first drinks. One of you had suggested walking to the bar, it didn't seem so far away at the time. On the way you'd stopped to get cigarettes, arguing over who was paying, Carmy beating you to the card machine by a split second.

The bar felt warm when you walked in, Carm's hand on your back as you removed your jacket not helping. He told you he'd order the drinks, disappearing before you could offer your card.

You joined the others, sitting down beside Richie and laughing as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and rested his head on yours. By the time Carmy came over with your drinks you were caught up in Syds's story, taking a moment before looking over to Carm and mouthing a ‘thank you’.

As the night went on, you weren't sure how many drinks you had actually had, between your trips to the bar more glasses were placed in front of you, everyone forgetting who they actually owed. In the latest bar you'd all ended up in, you leaned against Carmy's shoulder, his arm around yours.

“Oh shit,” You heard Richie exclaim, slowly dragging your gaze over to him.

“They got karaoke!”

“Karaoke?” You grinned, looking up at Carmy. “Oh wait, you're probably too cool for that, huh bro?”

“Shut up,” Carmy rolled his eyes with a smile, lightly squeezing your shoulder. “We can't all get up and belt out Sinatra.”

“Hey,” You raised a brow. “My drinks may be old but my music taste is not. Get me the sight up sheet.”

The lights of the stage felt bright and hot on your already warm skin, but you felt a rush of adrenaline as everyone cheered and your eyes met Carm's.

“Hey,” You smiled, giving a little wave and trying not to cringe at the sound of your voice in the microphone. “I'm gonna sing a song that I love, and hope I don't butcher it entirely.”

You laughed softly as the Bear crowd cheered, someone giving you a whistle. The alcohol-induced confidence took over you as the music started, and you decided to just embrace the moment as you held the microphone.

‘All the lights in Miami begin to gleam

Ruby, blue and green, neon too

Everything looks better from above my king

Like aquamarine, ocean's blue

Ah ah ah ah

Cacciatore

La da da da da

Limousines

Ah ah ah ah

Ciao amore

La da da da da

Soft ice cream’

Any lingering nerves you had disappeared when you looked over to your table and heard cheers, your eyes meeting Carmy's for a moment. His gaze was totally focused on you, your heart beating faster as you continued the song, feeling a little more confident as you kept your gaze on him.

‘Catch me if you can

Working on my tan

Salvatore

Dying by the hand

Of a foreign man

Happily

Calling out my name

In the summer rain

Ciao amore

Salvatore can wait

Now it's time to eat

Soft ice cream’

You felt like you were in a daze as the song ended, smiling when there was a round of applause and making your way back to the table. Richie squeezed your shoulder and went to get you a drink, which you knew would have you fully committing to a hangover but you didn't care.

“You were incredible,” Carmy whispered in your ear, low and warm. “I had no idea you could sing.”

“Really?” You grinned, turning your head and meeting his eyes. “Well I guess I'm just full of surprises.”

A couple of hours later, you found yourself trying not to fall asleep in the back of an Uber, your head on Carmy's shoulder. You were drunk, but not so much that you had lost all sense of yourself. Instead you felt pleasantly buzzed and sleepy, wanting to fall into your bed and stay there forever.

“We're here,” Carm gently squeezed your shoulder, dragging you from your drifting thoughts. “Let's go.”

You let him help you out of the car, your arm linked with his as he led you to the door of your building. It took a minute to remember the code to the door, but you got there in the end, laughing to yourself when it worked.

“Now I just need to remember what number my apartment is,” You sighed as you pushed the button for the elevator, grinning as Carmy gave you a deadpan look. “Kidding, don't worry.”

When you reached your front door, you expected Carmy to give a polite excuse and leave, even though that was the last thing you wanted him to do. When he didn't, you tried not to look too pleased, holding the door open for him and taking a deep breath.

“Where's your kitchen?” Carm asked, turning to you as you closed the door. “I'll get you some water.”

“Just through there,” You smiled, gesturing to the door on your left. “I'm gonna go change.”

You went into your bedroom, leaving the door open and flicking on the light. You peeled off your clothes and dropped them into/close enough to the laundry hamper before heading to the chest of drawers and pulling open a drawer. You rifled through until you found a pair of simple blue pajamas, pulling on the t-shirt then the shorts.

When you turned around Carm was heading through the door, glancing around the room before placing the glass of water on your nightstand. He turned to look at you and you felt your heart leap from your chest.

“Stay,” You asked, or rather requested, feeling a little embarrassed by your firmness. “I mean..if you want, you can stay. It's pretty late.”

“Oh, uh..okay,” Carmy nodded, and you found yourself relaxing a little. “Sure. I can crash on the couch.”

“Don't be stupid,” You smiled, gesturing to your double, albeit a small double, bed. “It's alright, I don't bite.”

Carm looked concerned for a moment before he laughed and shook his head.

“Ah what the hell. It's one night.”

“Don't sound too offended to share my bed,” You teased, walking over to the nightstand and picking up the glass. “Not just anyone gets that privilege.”

“I'm flattered,” Carm laughed softly, rubbing his neck. “Just don't want to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“You couldn't if you tried,” You insisted, gently touching his arm before sitting down on your bed. “Now hurry up, I'm exhausted.”

A couple of moments later, Carm was down to his shorts, and you tried not to stare. He turned out the light before you could hear him crossing the room. You slipped under the covers, your breath catching as you felt him get in beside you.

“Comfortable?” You asked, turning onto your side and resting your hand under your pillow.

“Yeah,” Carmy nodded, laying on his back. You could just about make him out in the dark, the lingering scent of his cologne, cigarettes and beer feeling heady and desirable. “Thanks.”

“You're welcome,” You murmured softly, taking a breath. “tonight was really fun..I can't really remember the last time I had a night out.”

“Me too,” Carm sighed softly, the mattress dipping slightly as he turned to face you. “I'll pay for it tomorrow, I feel the hangover creeping over the horizon.”

“That's the downside to getting older,” You shrugged softly. “You start to feel hungover before you've even gone to sleep.”

“Well you would know,” Carm retorted. “You old, old man.”

You gasped and reached out to lightly swat his arm, smiling as he laughed.

“That is uncalled for. I'm old, not old old.”

“Is there a difference?” Carm asked, his voice dropping low as he nestled into the pillow.

“Not really,” You murmured softly, your hand resting on the gap in the mattress. “But I stand by my actions.”

“Never had you pegged as violent,” Carm murmured, his hand resting close to yours. “Learning so much about you.”

“Hey I can't give away all my secrets,” You smiled softly, moving your hand ever so slightly closer to his. “I like being a little mysterious.”

“I like that,” Carmy laughed softly, his hand moving to lay gently on top of yours. “But I like everything about you so..hardly a surprise.”

You were quiet for a moment, a tired smile forming on your face.

“I like everything about you too,” You murmured softly, feeling like you could see Carm clearly even in the darkness.

“Hardly a surprise.”

He let out a gentle laugh, his thumb gently stroking over your hand. You felt your heart fly into your mouth, like you were suddenly wide awake and able to see through the alcohol-induced haze.

“We should get some sleep.”

The words had your heart dropping back into your stomach, your mouth turning dry.

“Uh..yeah, yeah we should,” You murmured, closing your eyes and trying not to feel so disappointed. “Sweet dreams.”

Before you knew it the mattress had dipped again, and his hand was gone from yours.

Carmy was already gone when you woke up the next morning, and you decided to try and put the memories of his hand on yours to rest.

For the next week at work, you felt like you weren't really yourself. Maybe it was subconscious, but you found yourself avoiding Carmy where possible. You sat at the opposite end of the table to him at family dinner, you stopped going for a smoke after work, and only really interacted with him in a professional manner. You could see he was confused by the change, and you hoped he would understand. In time you'd be like you were, you just needed time for your feelings to dissolve.

The following Saturday, you felt like you were going through the motions at work, flicking the customer service switch on when you needed to. Any time you'd gone into the kitchen Carm had looked at you with a smile and you had forced yourself to look away, guilt eating away at you.

Then it happened.

The worst possible situation you could find yourself in.

The front door had opened and you looked up from the reservations list to greet the latest visitors, your heart sinking as you saw who it was.

Your ex-boyfriend, someone you had very carefully avoided for months was walking towards you with a woman holding onto his arm and giggling. She looked beautiful, was probably a decent, kind person. You wondered how long it would be before she realized who exactly she was dating.

It took every ounce of self control you had to stay professional, to smile and greet the pair. The reservation was under her name, and you knew it was a purposely chosen move. He lived on the other side of town, there was no way he would just happen to come to the Bear if you didn't work there, you knew it.

After taking them to their table, you found Richie and told him you needed a moment, which he granted you. You went to the bathroom and locked yourself in a cubicle, leaning against the door.

He was out there, you couldn't avoid him. You imagined Richie getting their drinks, finding them to be a charming, loved up couple. Because your ex was great at making people think that. He was charming and witty and romantic, on the surface. Until you were alone with him.

You made your way back out to the floor, trying to focus on work. When you had to go into the kitchen you felt overwhelmed by the heat, the smells, the voices coming from every direction. You closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose, taking a deep breath. A moment later, you felt a hand on your back, your eyes opening and your heart calming as you met Carmy's gaze.

“Hey,” He smiled softly, raising a brow. “You good?”

“Yeah,” You nodded softly, wanting to touch his arm to ground yourself but forcing yourself not to. “I'm good.”

Back on the floor, you felt like you were in a daze. Any time you had to go to your ex's table it was like torture. He was perfectly polite, didn't give any indication he knew you, but you could feel his eyes burning into you.

After you took another small break to compose yourself, you left the bathroom and let out a gasp as you found your ex in the vestibule. You wanted to run to the door, go back to the floor. As you went to leave however, he grabbed your wrist, and you wanted to scream.

“Just gonna leave without saying hello properly?”

“Let me go,” You snapped, looking back at him and trying to pull your wrist free from his grasp. “Now.”

“What's the rush?” Your ex grinned, and you felt sick. “Let's have a little catch up. This where you been since you ran off?”

“I said let me go,” You repeated, gasping when your ex stepped forward and shoved you against the wall. He kept his hand on your wrist, his other hand resting on the wall by your head.

“Not so hasty hm?” Your ex smiled, tilting his head. “I think you owe me an explanation.”

“I don't owe you anything!” You snapped, trying to push him away and failing. “Get off me or I'll scream.”

“Oh try it,” Your ex laughed. “Your theatrics never worked before and they won't work now. “Now, maybe you want to tell me why you left? I never did get an explanation, did I?”

You opened your mouth to scream, the sound immediately muffled as your ex's hand clamped over your mouth, a furious look in his eyes.

“Don't you fucking dare,” He snapped, his hand pressing harder. “Nobody disrespect me, certainly not you. Look at you, you're pathetic.”

You felt tears welling up in your eyes, panic setting in. You knew what he was capable of, and you wouldn't be able to go back onto the floor if he lost control and left bruises.

The main door began to push open, your ex immediately stepping back from you while you tried to quickly compose yourself. You felt a sense of relief when Richie walked in, your heart racing as you spotted Carmy walk in behind him.

“Everything okay?” Richie asked, looking over to you. “You were gone a while,” He looked over to your ex, skeptically, before looking back to you. “Just wanted to see if you were good to get back out.”

“Yes,” You nodded, taking a deep breath and avoiding meeting anyone's eyes. “Apologies, chef. I'll head back out.”

“She will in a second,” Your ex smiled, reaching out to grab your wrist, his fingers digging into your skin. “We're old friends, just catching up.”

“Well I have to go,” You murmured, trying to subtly free yourself and feeling fresh tears well up as your ex tightened his grip. “So..”

“Right,” Richie nodded, his eyes on your ex while you briefly met Carmy's gaze. “I'll escort you back to your table, sir.”

“Yeah, in a minute,” Your ex nodded, pulling you closer to him. “We just have some things to discuss.”

“Please don't do this,” You muttered, tears filling your vision, trying to pull your wrist free as your ex grabbed your arm firmly.

“Hey,” You heard Carmy's voice and looked down at the ground, trying to compose yourself. “I need my staff to get back to work, and I need you to get the fuck out of my restaurant.”

“Fuck yes cousin,” Richie nodded. “He's out.”

“I don't think so,” Your ex laughed, squeezing your arm harder. “I'm a paying customer, show some respect.”

“Show some respect?” Carmy repeated, a harsh edge in his voice. “I'm giving you a chance to leave quietly, I suggest you take it.”

“Or what?” Your ex smirked, stepping closer to you. “I'll leave when I want. Like I said, we're catching up.”

“That's it,” Carmy sighed, stepping closer. “Get the fuck out of my restaurant right now before I have you forcibly removed.”

You let out a gasp as you were pushed back against the wall, everything happening in a blur. You could hear Carm and Richie saying something as they grabbed your ex and pulled him off you. Richie hauled him outside before Carmy's hand was in yours, guiding you out into the restaurant and through the kitchen, the two of you finally ending up in his office.

“Sit down,” Carm gestured to the desk chair. “I'll go get you some water.”

“No,” You insisted, reaching out to touch his arm. “Please. Don't leave me alone.”

Carm was quiet for a moment before he nodded, stepping closer to you and wrapping his arms around you. You buried your face in his neck, clinging to him as you tried to stop your tears to no avail.

You weren't sure how much time passed, but before you knew it it was closing time. You assured Carm you were okay before you went to help Richie out front, giving him a nod as he gave you a concerned look.

When it came time to leave, you clutched your keys tightly in your hand, making your way to your car and taking a deep breath. You felt like you couldn't breathe properly until you arrived back home and checked every room. Your ex didn't know where you lived, but it didn't stop you feeling a little paranoid.

After getting ready for bed, you decided to stay up a little longer, settling on the couch to watch a movie. While you were scrolling through Netflix your phone rang, and the brief panic that hit you subsided when you saw it was Carmy calling you.

“Hey,” You smiled softly as you answered, picking up one of the cushions and holding it against you. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, all good,” Carm replied, and you could swear you heard traffic in the background. “Could you let me into your building? I didn't want to buzz, just in case.”

“Oh,” You glanced to the door before slowly standing up. “Uh..yeah, yeah just give me a second.”

You set the cushion down and walked to the door, pushing the button to open the door.

“Come on up, I'll see you in a second.”

You ended the call, taking a step back from the door and clutching your phone. When there was a knock at your door you took a second before opening it.

“Hey, come in,” You stepped aside, giving a quick glance out to the hall before closing the door and turning to Carmy.

“Are you sure everything is okay?”

“Of course,” Carm nodded, rubbing his cheek. “I uh..I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I was going to offer you ride home but I thought I might be being too much and you would be uncomfortable which is fair then I couldn't stop thinking about you and I thought I should-”

You held up your hand with a smile, tilting your head slightly.

“I'm glad you're here. I probably would have ended up calling you anyway so..it's fine. I'm just trying to find a movie, I'm open to suggestions.”

An hour later, you were sitting on the couch with your head on Carm's shoulder, his arm around your waist. You were only half focused on the movie, too busy enjoying Carm's presence after isolating yourself for a week. Cuddling up to him wouldn't help you dissolve your feelings but you were willing to overlook that, given recent events.

“Damn,” Carm murmured softly, his hand gently stroking your waist. “I guess they'll have to take down the government after all.”

“What?” You raised a brow, looking over to him.

“I knew you weren't paying attention,” Carmy laughed softly, looking at you with a grin.

“Oh shut up,” You rolled your eyes playfully. “it's not my fault it can't hold my attention. Got other things on my mind.”

“Yeah,” Carm nodded, clearing his throat and looking up for a moment. “I uh..I wanted to ask, how are you feeling after..after tonight?”

You thought about it for a moment, looking over to the TV and letting out a soft sigh.

“I feel like it was some kind of surreal dream. I don't hear so much as a whisper for months, almost a year, then suddenly he's just there..but I really appreciate what you did,” You looked back to Carmy, gently touching his arm. “I hate that you had to get involved in my drama but..thank you.”

“Don't mention it,” Carm looked back to you. “I wasn't going to stand back and let it happen. You don't deserve to be treated like that. You deserve..I don't know, the universe.”

“The universe?” You repeated, smiling softly. “That's a lot to handle but..if I'm deserving of it I guess I'll learn to handle the responsibility.”

“That's my girl,” Carm smiled, and you felt a knot twist in your stomach at how much the words made your heart leap. “You deserve it and more.”

“Could you..could you not say that?” You murmured softly, taking a deep breath and feeling guilty when Carm immediately looked like he'd regretted everything he'd ever done.

“It wasn't bad, I just..I want you to say those things but I also don't because it's just going to give me more feelings for you and I really can't even handle the ones I already have so..”

“You have feelings for me,” Carm murmured softly, and you weren't sure whether it was a question or a statement, looking away from him. “I..I had no idea. I mean, I didn't think you hated me but..you were so distant this week I thought I'd done something to you.”

“No, never,” You insisted, trying not to cry at how badly you felt you were handling the situation. “I just thought I could get rid of my feelings if I wasn't around you so much, that's all.”

“Why didn't you just tell me?” Carm asked softly, his hand on your waist feeling more prominent. “Am I so unapproachable? Oh god, am I unapproachable? That's it isn't it? You thought I would like flip out or something, and I swear I never would, not at you, ever.”

“I know,” You nodded, looking back at him. “I just..I didn't want to make things awkward. I'm not in high school, I don't want to act like I am. I may as well have gotten Syd to pass you a note from me, check the box if you like me kinda vibe.”

“Don't you want to know if I would have ticked the box?” Carm asked, his tone gentle. “Because I would have. Every time.”

You laughed softly, shaking your head and looking up.

“Damn, guess I should have sent you the none then hm?”

“Well there's still time,” Carm smiled as you looked back at him. “Though I can't guarantee Syd wouldn't just chuck it in the trash. You know when you started she told me not to fall in love with you because the restaurant needs you more than I do?”

“Good thing you didn't then,” You smiled, leaning in a little closer and resting your hand on Carm's cheek. “I can stay.”

You leaned in and closed the gap between you, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. He hesitated for a moment before kissing you back, surging forward.

Your arms wrapped around Carm's neck as he eased you onto your back, the kiss deepening. All the stress of the evening melted away as you felt Carm touch you carefully, smiling into the kiss as you reached for the hem of his white t-shirt and tugged it up.

It didn't like long to have Carm completely stripped, a frown on his face as he looked at you.

“Well this isn't a fair trade.”

“No?” You smiled, picking at your pajama top. “ Well I'm not stopping you leveling the field.”

It took a little longer for you to be stripped, your breath catching in your throat as Carm took his time removing your pajamas, leaving a trail of kisses on your skin as he did. You felt exposed, laying on the couch in your deeply unsexy mismatched bra and panties, but in the most wonderful way.

“Still not quite even,” You smiled softly, reaching out to gently stroke Carm's cheek and beaming when he leaned down to kiss you, his hand gripping your waist.

“You're right,” Carm murmured softly, pulling back and meeting your eyes. “It's not fair.”

He sat back, his hand slowly moving down to grip the waistband of your panties. You kept your eyes on him as he slowly peeled them down your thighs, stopping after a moment.

“Close enough.” He grinned,his hands moving to your thighs and lifting them up. Your breath hitched in your throat as you watched him move between your legs, closing your eyes as he slowly spread your legs, feeling the material of your panties rub against your leg.

“Oh god,” You breathed as you felt Carm lick a stripe along your already soaked folds, his hands gripping your thighs and holding you in place. His movements were achingly slow as he licked you, one of his hands slowly moving along your thigh.

It had been a long while since you'd felt so good, a wave slowly building in your stomach. Any urge to beg for more was dissolved as you felt Carm's finger gently sweep across your entrance, his tongue swirling your clit. You couldn't focus on anything, your hand moving to his curls as he eased his finger into your warm entrance, your eyes clenching shut as moans tumbled from your lips.

By the time he added a second finger you felt like you were ready to fall apart, his tongue moving slowly but precisely, exactly where you needed without having to tell him.

“Oh, fuck,” You moaned as you felt yourself get closer to the edge, your free hand clamping over your forehead. “Please..I..ohh my god..”

You felt your eyes roll back into your head, your breath catching in your throat as you came, feeling like you could see stars.

You wasted no time in pulling Carm up to you, tasting yourself on his lips and letting out a moan at the sensation. He pulled at your bra straps, tugging down your bra and rolling your nipple between his thumb and finger.

“Please,” You murmured against his lips, your forehead hot against his. “Fuck me, now, please..”

“Are you sure?” Carm asked, giving you another kiss as he moved his hand down between your legs, a moan escaping you as he touched your sensitive pussy.

“We can go to your bed, or wait, or..”

“Carm,” You breathed, opening your eyes and looking at him. “Please..I can't wait. I'm on the pill, it's fine, just..please.”

He met your gaze, a look in his eyes you hadn't seen before that had you soaked even more instantly.

“Use your words,” He murmured softly, two fingers pushing back into you as you moaned. “What does my girl want?”

“Oh god,” You groaned, wanting to stay in the moment forever. “I want..I want you to fuck me, now.”

“Anything my girl wants,” Carm grinned, slowly easing his fingers out of you and replacing them with his thick cock, another moan escaping you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your legs hooked around his waist, wanting him as close as possible.

You felt like everything fell away around you as Carm moved slowly, getting you used to the feel of him, before he was pulling you up into his lap, his lips wrapping around your hard nipple as your nails dug into your shoulders, his hands on your waist encouraging you to set the pace.

By the time the two of you were laying on the couch, catching your breath with your arms lazily draped around each other, you wondered when you'd last been so unbearably happy.

“I'll understand if you immediately run away when I say this,” You looked over to Carm with a smile. “But.

I love you.”

He looked over to you, a wide smile on his face as he moved closer, his arm wrapping firmly around your waist.

“I love you too. Which is a shame, I guess. Gotta find a new hostess now.”

“Yeah, sucks to be you,” You grinned, moving your hand into Carm's hair. “Though before you fire me could you help me fulfill this little fantasy I have of fucking my boss at work?”

“I guess I could,” Carm grinned, leaning in to place a kiss to the corner of your mouth. “Let's get in some more practice shall we?”

#the bear #the bear 🐻#the bear fic #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x you #carmen berzatto x reader #request #we got there eventually

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unsolved-duvall · 1 year

Note

Hi! Could you do an Eddie Munson X reader where it’s readers first time and nervous but Eddie is gentle?

𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐞 - 𝐞.𝐦. (𝟏𝟖+)

hi my love! thank you so much for the request, i hope this is okay <3

warnings 18+ only fem!reader, virgin!reader, smut, fluff, gentle eddie, heavy kissing, oral (fem receiving), fingering, protected sex, praise kink, hair pulling, reader cries during sex (she’s overwhelmed, but it’s all good i promise!), aftercare, i think that's it but if i've missed anything please (politely) let me know! i'm so sorry if there are spelling or grammar errors, it's five in the morning and i've just finished this <3

The trailer always felt uncomfortably quiet when it was just you there. You had been resistant at first, when Eddie had given you a key and told you to treat it like your own home. You didn't want to intrude on his and Wayne's space. But he had promised you that when he had asked Wayne if it was okay for you to have a key, he had only told Eddie that he thought you already had one, expected you to. He had always treated you like his own, and you were so grateful for that.

So there you were, sat on the couch, it was comfortable and it had started to feel like home. Orange lights flickering from the lamps you had turned on around the room; you never put on the big light.

The sounds from the television reverberated around the trailer, some old tv show was on, but you weren't paying any attention to it. You had only turned it on in a futile attempt to try and distract yourself, to calm yourself down and stop your mind from racing a million miles an hour.

Eddie would be home in twenty minutes, give or take. Sometimes he got carried away with a last-minute job at the garage. Other times he was home at six o'clock on the dot. Desperate to see you.

You and Eddie had been dating for a while now and you'd honestly never been happier.

Except you hadn't had sex yet. Ever.

Eddie didn't know you were a virgin. He had never pushed you to go further than you felt comfortable with. You would touch each other, over your clothes, of course. You had definitely had some pretty needy makeout sessions on his bed, all soft whimpers and needy hands. But you had never gone further than that. You had always made some excuse up to stop, telling him that you were tired or needed to go home. He would never question you, but you could tell he was starting to be confused by your actions. You would kiss him desperately, your hips grinding down into his as he held you on his lap on the couch. He could feel how needy you were, could hear your fast breaths and small moans that you couldn't hold back whenever his tongue would run over yours. But still, you never went further than that.

Of course, Eddie would never push you. He assumed you just wanted to wait and he was okay with that. Fuck, if all he could do was kiss you forever he thought he would be okay with that too.

But you didn't want that. You wanted more. You wanted to sleep with him, more than anything. It consumed your mind twenty four hours a day, it truly was all you could think about. How he would feel, how he would hold you, how he would sound. Fuck.

But you had never done anything like that before. You were so worried you would be bad at it, that you wouldn't know what to do and Eddie would get bored of you.

You knew Eddie had slept with a couple of people before, not many, but he definitely had experience. You didn't know if that made you feel better or worse.

Just as your thoughts started to overwhelm you, the front door swung open. You knew it was Eddie just from his footsteps.

You turned your head and were met with that sickly-sweet smile he gave you whenever he got home.

"Hey baby" Eddie walked over to you, pressing a delicate kiss to your lips before he turned to go and change out of his work clothes.

Fuck. Okay.

Your feet were carrying you into his bedroom before you realised what you were doing, coming to lean in his doorway as you watched him pull on an old t-shirt and pyjama bottoms. You hadn't said anything as you had followed him, quite frankly you weren't sure he had even realised you had followed him.

"Can I talk to you?" You blurted out, making even yourself jump.

Eddie tensed up as he realised you were standing behind him, quickly relaxing again when he met your eyes.

"Yeah sweetheart, 'course. Is everything okay?" worry was etched onto his face, you were never this serious and dour looking.

When you didn't answer he gently took hold of your hand and led you over to his bed, sitting both of you down. You crossed your legs and pulled your hands into your body, fiddling with your fingers as you tried to find the right words.

Eddie's eyes darted down to your hands and saw how restless you were; you only did that when you really nervous, he had come to learn. He held both of your hands in between one of his in an attempt to calm you as much as he could. He didn't say anything, he knew you would speak when you were ready.

"I, uh- well do you know how we've never... I mean we've done some things, um-" You were blabbering, you didn't know why you were so nervous, it was just Eddie.

"Take a breath, it's okay." Eddie;s soft voice pulled down that wall of anxiety you had built around yourself.

"We've never had sex" the words left your mouth before you had even registered them. Your mouth dropped open and you tried to pull yourself away from him out of embarrassment, but he wouldn't let you. His thumb rubbing soothing circles over the back of your hand.

"I know." was all he said. He was slowly putting the pieces together. Your nerves, the way you were holding his hands a bit tighter than normal, the way you couldn't sit still. He was almost sure he knew where you were going with this, but he didn't want to assume, so he waited for you to say more.

"Do you want to?" you asked him, looking away from him, your eyes landing on the wall behind his head.

"I, well-" it was Eddie's turn to be flustered now. Because, of course he did. But he didn't know quite how to say that without sounding incredibly desperate. He was trying to keep his cool here. It was a losing battle.

He saw the anxiety flood your face, he could see how unsure you looked. He would do anything to get rid of that look.

"Sweetheart. Of course I do. I love you. But I don't want to if you don't want to."

"I want to." There was no holding back anymore, it was like the flood gates had opened and you needed to feel him. But you knew you needed to tell him one other thing before you both got carried away.

"I've never done this before." You breathed out, your eyes meeting his. "Ever. This would be my first, uh my first time."

"You're a virgin?" Eddie asked you, he couldn't hold back the slight surprise that laced his words and spread across his face.

"I'm sorry." you said. You weren't sure why, but you felt like you needed to.

Eddie pulled back a bit, his eyes scanning your face, "Baby you don't need to apologise for that, why would you say sorry?" he was genuinely confused. Did he think that you thought he wouldn't want to sleep with you because you were a virgin?

"I don't know what I'm doing," your voice came out small and timid. You had never heard yourself sound like that before. "It probably won't be very good for you, Eddie"

"Baby, first of all. This is you we're talking about. If you haven't already noticed I'm kind of ridiculously in love with you. You only have to kiss me and I fall apart," you can't help but laugh at his words, a small blush spreading across your cheeks as he pulls you closer to him.

"So please don't think for a second that sleeping with you could ever be bad." he held your hips and tapped them gently, signalling for you to sit across his lap, your legs on either side of his, as he rubbed a comforting hand up and down your back.

"Secondly, if you really want to do this. Then I promise you, it will all be on your terms okay? I won't do anything unless you tell me I can. This is all about you, yeah?" Eddie's voice had dropped a few octaves, you didn't know if he was doing it on purpose or if he was just trying to calm himself down. You could feel him beneath you, sitting on his lap didn't leave much to the imagination.

"Okay." You whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I want to do this with you, Eddie. Tonight. Now."

"Fuck, okay." Eddie lifted a hand to push your hair off your warm face, he let his hand rest on your cheek for a bit, his thumb rubbing underneath your eye, comforting you.

You couldn't wait any longer, and you had a feeling Eddie wasn't going to do anything until you made the first move. So you leant in, your lips barely brushing over his as you closed your eyes.

"I got you." was all Eddie said before he was kissing you like his life depended on it. It was slow and soft and deep and it felt like you had just taken your first breath.

You had kissed before, but there was something debilitating about this one. The promise it held, the knowledge that this was all building up to more. Eddie let his tongue run over you bottom lip, eliciting a soft whine from you as you opened for him. His tongue running over yours as the kiss deepened.

His hands were hesitant. One was resting on your hip, and the other was holding the back of your head, keeping you flush against him. But you needed more.

"Eddie," you breathed out, breathing the words against his lips.

"Yeah, sweetheart?"

"You can touch me, it's okay."

"Yeah? Can you lie down for me, is that okay? Or do you wanna stay like this?" Eddie asked you, his forehead resting against yours, his eyes heavy with want.

"I wanna lie down, yeah." you told him quietly. He moved you both gently so that you were lying pressed against the soft mattress beneath you. You moved your legs so he could lay in between them, he breathed out an almost silent thank you at your movements.

Neither of you wanted to break the comfortable quietness that was filling his bedroom. The sounds of your breathing and movements were more than enough.

Eddie leant down to press his lips against yours again, the kiss still as slow and deep as the first one. Your hands moved to rest in his hair, your fingers tangling in the curls he never brushed out on a work day. His weight rested on his forearms, but he used one hand to rest on your cheek. Your entire being was filled with Eddie. His tongue in your mouth, his hand on your body. It was all just Eddie Eddie Eddie.

Time didn't exist when Eddie had you pinned against the mattress. You might have been kissing for two minutes or two hours; you had no way of knowing. Not when he had managed to find his way into every part of you; his kiss running through your veins, filling your lungs as you breathed him in.

He made sure to hold his weight off of you, but still, it was all consuming. His hair fell around your faces and you couldn't imagine doing anything else but this for the rest of your life.

But that need grew deeper and you subconsciously moved one of your legs to wrap it around Eddie's waist. Pulling him tighter against you. That, mixed with your moans that you were not letting flow freely from you, was a silent plea for him to give you more.

That was all Eddie had been waiting for. He needed you to need him, not just want him.

He reluctantly pulled away from kissing you, his lips trailing down your jaw and landing on your neck. You craned your head back, pressing it further into the pillow that Eddie had somehow got underneath your head when he lay you down.

He pressed soft kisses on your neck, he wasn't trying to mark you. Not tonight, not unless you explicitly asked him to. Tonight he was determined to be as gentle and tender with you as possible. He needed you to feel safe with him. It was the least he could do, you were being as vulnerable as you could be with another human being, and he respected that.

He honestly couldn't wrap his head around the fact that he was lucky enough to be with you in this way. Your soft skin under his fingertips and your small whimpers in his ears, this was as close to heaven as he was sure he was ever going to get.

Eddie pulled his head from your neck and saw your blissed out face, how your eyes were softly shut and your eyelashes fluttered against your cheek.

He moved his hands down to rest on the waistband of the pyjama pants you had on.

They were his.

You felt his fingertips at your waist and you opened your eyes to watch him.

"Can I take these off, angel?" Eddie breathed. Placing a small kiss on your stomach, just above where the waistband sat.

You nodded your head in a deafening confirmation. "Nuh-uh sweetheart, I need you to use your words for me, okay?" Eddie looked up at you from where he lay between your legs. The sight alone was enough to send your heart racing.

"You can take them off," you responded, "please take them off." almost begging as your voice cracked with every word. You didn't realise how desperate you were until you were so close to having what you needed.

"That's my girl, thank you." Eddie said, his calloused fingers moving to go underneath the waistband of your his pyjama pants. He moved them down, pulling them over your hips and down your thighs. Every movement was slow, soft, calculated.

All intended to have you desperate and whining underneath him by the end of it.

Before you had time to register it, legs were bare and Eddie was kissing them. Small, barely there kisses, intended only to relax you when he felt you tense up under his gaze.

You didn't know what to do with your hands. They lay limp beside you. You didn't know what you were meant to be doing. Were you meant to touch him? Move your hips for him to take your underwear off? Pull him up to kiss him again? You didn't know-

"Hey, sweetheart, look at me." Eddie's stern but loving voice pulled you out of the onslaught of insecurity that threatened to take over. Your breathing had sped up, he had noticed that, but not because of him.

"We can stop if you want to, okay? We don't have to do this if you've changed your mind, that's okay. We can talk more about this more before we do anything else. I can kiss you some more, or I can leave you alone, if that's what you want. I just need you to tell me, okay love? Just tell me what you need me to do."

You didn't know what to say, or do, or think, or feel. You were overwhelmed, but in a good way. Eddie had barely touched you and this was already more than you could have asked for it to be.

You felt the bed move beside you, Eddie was about to move off of you. You realised you hadn't said anything to him, and he had probably taken that to mean that you wanted to stop. You grabbed his arm and he paused his movements, not yet lowering himself back over you, but not moving further away either.

"I don't want to stop. I just- fuck, I don't know." you had never been good with words, Eddie knew that, it was why he was so patient with you. It wasn't that you didn't know what you wanted to say, it was that you couldn't say it.

"I'm just nervous." Eddie's eyes softened at your vulnerability.

"But I want this, I want you. I just need you to tell me what to do, show me. I don't want to make all the moves here, please, I need you to do that."

You saw the hesitancy that hit Eddie at hearing your confession, he didn't want you to feel like you didn't have any control in this situation.

"I know, I know that you want me to tell you what's okay and what's not but- Eddie, everything is okay. Touch me, kiss me, I don't care. I'm doing this with you because I love you."

Both of your hearts were racing. Eddie had never heard you so certain, he had never heard you speak so confidently. There was still a shake to your voice, it was still quiet and vulnerable. But he knew you meant every word, he knew how hard it was for you to be so open with him. It made his heart break and repair itself all in one go.

"I trust you and I need you to trust me when I tell you that I will tell you if you do something I don't like, or don't feel comfortable with. But please, I'm begging you, please fuck me, I've waited so long." A breathy laugh laced your last words, you couldn't quite tell if you were laughing out of relief or nervousness, but either way.

You felt okay. You felt good. You felt like this was exactly where you were meant to be.

"Okay." Eddie leant back down and kissed you. It was quick, his tongue barely passing yours, but it was enough. It sent your heart racing again, because of Eddie. His taste lingering on your tongue as he lowered himself down your body until he was lay with his head resting on your thigh, his hands on your waist.

"Can I touch touch you here, angel?" Eddie asked despite what you had just told him, his fingers lightly grazing your cunt still covered by the fabric of your underwear.

You went to nod your head but then Eddie's earlier words echoed in your mind, "Yeah you can touch me." you moaned out, a small kiss he placed on your inner thigh causing your fingers to grasp the blanket beneath you.

"Good girl." Eddie praised you, it was quiet, almost as if he was uncertain at what your reaction would be. But when he saw your breath hitch he smirked, he knew you liked that shit. He just knew it.

Eddie ran his fingers over your slit, your wetness had practically drenched your underwear. If Eddie wanted to, he didn't say anything about it. Instead he just slowly moved his fingers along you, so gentle that if you weren't so worked up you barely would have felt it.

But you did. You could feel everything. His hands on you, his breath on your cunt, his hair that fell over your thigh.

Eddie went to move your underwear, but before he pulled it off you he looked up at you once more, a silent question hung in the air between you.

You nodded, and Eddie kept looking at you as his fingers slid underneath your underwear and he pulled them off you, throwing them somewhere behind him. You suddenly felt incredibly exposed, you closed your legs in reflex. Eddie wasn't having that.

"Open your legs for me, baby. It's just me, I promise you're okay."

Eddie could ask you to jump off a cliff in that voice and you would say yes. Your legs fell open slowly, your head turned to the side to hide in the pillow under you.

"Fuck sweets, you're fucking perfect." Eddie sounded wrecked. His voice hoarse and breaking at the final word.

"I'm gonna touch you now, okay? You tell me if something hurts, or you don't like it."

"Okay," you managed to get the word out, hardly.

Eddie finally ran his fingers through you. Gathering your wetness between them and moving his fingers up to that sweet spot between your legs; it took him a second to find it, but when he did your hips bucked up and the sweetest moan fell from your open mouth.

"Yeah? That felt good, huh sweetheart?" Eddie kept working his fingers against you, occasionally dropping them back down and running them over your slit, never dipping them into you just yet.

He pressed soft, slow circles over your clit, his fingers pulling obscene sounds from you, you tried to hold them back, moving a hand to muffle the noises you were making. "No baby, let me hear you." was all Eddie had said before you dropped your hand and lost yourself in the new sensations.

You had touched yourself before, but it had never felt like this. When you did it, it always felt rushed, like you were racing towards the finish line, and when you got there it was never as good as everyone else seemed to say it was. But not with Eddie.

You were getting desperate. Eddie was leaning over you and his fingers were on you and you could hear his breath hitch every time you moaned and you could see his eyebrows srunched together in concentration as he touched you.

It was like a waterfall of emotions ran over you and you needed him right now. You needed him inside you or you were sure you would start crying.

"Eds, please."

"What do you need baby? huh?" Eddie asked you, his tone almost mocking. It truly wasn't meant to be. He was being as sincere as he could be, but you were falling apart underneath his touch and he was dying inside.

"I need you. Need you inside me, please just, please-" Eddie cut you off with an all-consuming kiss. His lips moving against yours, his fingers never once stalling their never-ending movements against your most sensitive part.

"Not yet, baby. I gotta get you ready first, okay? You gotta take my fingers before you can take me, yeah? Can you do that for me, is that okay?"

"Yeah, shit, okay."

Eddie moved away from your face, leaning so he could watch where his fingers lay against you. He slowly moved them down to run between your folds, like he had done before, only this time he kept them there. You felt his middle finger press against your entrance and you had to fight every instinct in your body to stop yourself bucking your hips against his hand.

Eddie gently pressed his finger into you, he moved so slowly you barely felt the pressure. He stopped once he got to his knuckle and looked up at you, "does that feel okay? It doesn't hurt or anything?"

He was so sincere it broke your heart, "It's tight," you told him honestly. "But it's okay, it feels good."

"Okay, okay baby." Eddie pulled back and pressed his finger back into you, a little further this time and you mewled at the new sensation. He stopped quickly, waiting for you to tell him to stop, but you didn't, you just tightened your grip on his arm.

He kept working you open until you took his whole finger, his ring rubbing against your entrance with each smooth thrust against you. Soon, it wasn't enough and you needed more.

"I can take more." you told him, eyelashes fluttering up at him as he watched your face.

"Good girl" Eddie breathed against your ear and goosebumps ran down your arms. He smiled, clearly pleased with your reaction.

Eddie moved another finger to press into you, both of them together was a stretch you weren't expecting. You winced again and the concern flooded back into Eddie's face, "you can do this baby, huh? It'll feel so good I promise. Just breathe for me."

You listened to Eddie's every word like it was law. Taking in steadying breaths with each thrust of his fingers, as he worked you open.

Soon both of his fingers were inside you. It still felt sore, but the pleasure was overwhelming and you couldn't help the way your hips moved to meet his movements. Eddie's face lightened at your reaction, at how your eyes went heavy with pleasure and your body moved of its own accord.

You moved a hand that was resting beside you to pull him down by his chain that dangled over you, into a fiery kiss. All teeth and tongue as you clenched around his fingers.

"Fuck baby," Eddie pulled back from your kiss, looking down at your cunt and then back up at you again, "can I eat you out, is that okay?"

You felt your confidence falter, you didn't know what that meant. Not really. It felt embarassing not to know, you should know, right?

It was as if Eddie could read your mind, he placed a soothing kiss on your forehead before he said "So, I put my mouth on you and I use my tongue and it feels really fucking good, so I've been told."

Eddie winced at his accidental mention of his other sexual experiences. Not that it was a secret, but it wasn't the right time for him to bring them up. He was just trying to relax you.

"Oh- okay, yeah. You can do that." You told him, pointedly ignoring his mention of other experiences. He didn't mean it like that, he was just as nervous as you were, he was just better at hiding it. For your sake.

Eddie placed one last gentle kiss to your lips before slipping his fingers out of you carefully, and moving down to your centre. He pulled your legs over his shoulders and made sure you were comfortable.

Then, he ran his tongue over your folds and over your clit. And your whole body convulsed under you. Your back arching up and your neck craning back.

Eddie laughed against you, "Oh yeah? Was that okay?" he knew the answer, but you seemed more comfortable now and he wanted to tease you a bit, he figured it would turn you on even more, and he would do anything to see your desperation grow.

"Fucking shit, oh my god- yeah, please do that again, Eddie-"

You didn't need to ask him twice, he delved back in. Running his tongue through your slit before dipping it inside you quickly, the action pulling a moan from the back of your throat. "You can put your hands in my hair if you need to sweetheart, it's okay" you weren't sure what Eddie meant straight away, but then Eddie moved his mouth up to your clit.

You almost died, you were sure of it.

Your hand reached down to grab onto his hair. Either to ground you or keep him pressed against you. You weren't sure.

Eddie kept lapping at your cunt like it was breathing air into his lungs, his tongue alternating between sucking your clit into his mouth and running down your folds, dipping into you and tasting how desperate you were.

You tightened your grip in his curls and his hold on your waist got firmer, keeping you pinned against the mattress.

"Eddie," you said suddenly.

He pulled back and looked up at you, his mouth covered in your wetness. If you weren't so turned on you would have crawled away from him out of embarrassment. But instead it only made your stomach drop and your heart race.

"I need you to fuck me" was all you said.

"Are you sure, you were so close angel?" He had heard you hold your breath and felt you legs tighten around him, he could already read you better than you could.

"No, I wanna come with you inside me, please." You were practically begging at this point and Eddie relented. He didn't want you begging, not this time. He wanted to give you whatever you needed.

“Okay angel, let me get a condom yeah?” you nodded as Eddie moved away from you. It was only then that you noticed he was still fully dressed. Something about that made your breath hitch. You didn’t know why.

You watched as Eddie pulled his top over his head, his eyes found yours as you stared at his bare chest. He bit back a smirk, he wouldn’t tease you about that, not yet anyway.

You were pulled out of your trance when you saw him take of his pyjama bottoms he had thrown on earlier. He hadn’t put any underwear off, something you were very grateful for.

He was big, but you already knew that. You had felt him before when you moved your hips against him during those late night make-out sessions. You had also seen him before, Eddie had a habit of walking around the trailer without a towel, after a shower, when he knew Wayne wasn’t home. He had made sure you were comfortable with it first, and when you have managed to stumble out that you had no objections to it he had only kissed you and told you he would also have no objections to you walking around naked.

Eddie grabbed a condom from his side table and rolled it on. You meant to ask if you could do it for him, but you were too distracted.

He moved to lay back on top of you and you grabbed his shoulders instantly, you felt the nerves creeping back in and you needed to ground yourself.

"I've got you baby" Eddie said, as if he knew exactly why you had grabbed onto him, "I'll go real slow, I promise. If it hurts you just tell me and I'll stop."

You nodded your head and Eddie tapped your thighs, encouraging you to wrap your legs around him.

Eddie reached down and lined himself up against your hot cunt, your breath hitched at the slight contact and you closed your eyes.

"Hey, look at me," Eddie said, "Give me your eyes sweetheart, I need to see you while we do this" Eddie's voice had never sounded so gentle.

You opened your heavy eyelids and met his gaze, it was full of love and adoration and you were sure yours mimicked his.

Eddie leant down and pressed his lips against yours. He was trying to distract you while he first pushed in, you didn't know that though.

Eddie gently pushed into you, barely even getting the tip in before you winced in pain. He looked at you, eyes full of worry, he thought he would get a little more in before you reacted like that.

"It's okay, it's okay" Eddie told you when he saw your face scrunch up in worry. "It's normal for it to hurt the first time baby, do you want me to stop?"

"No, fuck, it's okay" you shifted uncomfortably but soon stopped moving when you realised it only made it hurt more.

"Just- keep going slow, I'm just nervous"

"I know, but you're doing so well for me, huh?" Eddie encouraged you and it helped ease you a little more.

He pushed in a little more, ready to stop when your body tensed up again, but you told him to keep going, that it was more of a harsh pressure than actual pain. So he did, reluctantly, watching your face for any sign of you being in more pain.

He got about halfway in before you pushed back on his shoulder and asked him to stop. He still inside you and pressed a kiss to your parted lips, "good girl, thank you for telling me".

You nodded your head, your eyes screwed shut again as you tried to adjust to the feeling of him being inside you. "Just breathe, that's it baby."

Eddie ran his hand through the hair that had fallen over your face, pushing it off you so he could properly see you.

You took a couple of deep breaths, basking in the love and attention Eddie was showing you. Soon enough the dull pain turned to a pulsing need to feel more of him.

"You can move" you told him, he kissed your cheek and started to push his hips in again. It didn't hurt as much anymore. Eddie had snaked his hand between your bodies to run his fingers over your sensitive clit in a bid to distract you from the dull ache.

It worked, because soon enough he had fully bottomed out in you.

"How does that feel sweets?" Eddie asked you.

"it's a lot" you replied, Eddie just smiled and rubbed his nose against yours. If you had told him a year ago he would be rubbing noses with some girl he was ridiculously in love with he would have laughed and then told you to fuck off, he would never do that, But here he was.

"But it feels good, it's just, oh shit, like a dull ache that's all. It doesn't hurt anymore." You assure him.

"That's good baby, you did so well for me. You just tell me when I can move." He told you, dipping his head down to rest in the juncture of your neck, pressing heavy kisses into your skin.

You let him carry on like that for a minute, enjoying his lips on your skin and how full you felt from his being fully inside you.

"You can move, Eddie." You told him after a while. Your legs tightening around his waist.

"Fuck, okay angel" The relief Eddie felt at being able to finally move was palpable. He pulled out of you slightly before he pushed back in, you moaned instantly and it only spurred him on more.

He found a rhythm that was perfect for both of you, he never fully pulled out, but he kept the pressure on you as he ground his hips against yours, hitting that sweet spot inside you that had you seeing stars.

You swear your whole body was crying out for Eddie. You moaned and whimpered, his name falling from your tongue like a prayer. He kept his head in your neck, sucking love bites into your skin after you had begged him to. The burst blood vessels underneath your skin made it look like Eddie was painting a galaxy across your neck.

He eventually pulled back and kissed you. Deep and sure. But your moans kept you from kissing him back the way you wanted to. You clawed at his back and shoulders and he let his head fall to rest next to yours. You could hear every moan he made when he was that close to you, and you swear it was that which sent you tumbling over the edge of that cliff Eddie had held you over all evening.

"Fuck, baby, I think I'm-" you couldn't even finish your sentence, pleasure washing over you.

"Yeah sweetheart? You gonna come for me, huh?" Eddie talked you through it as your scrunched your eyes closed and pulled his hips closer to you, you feet digging into his lower back.

"That's my girl, let go for me. I've got you, it's okay."

You fell apart underneath him and you were almost certain you screamed his name, but you couldn't be sure. Your ears were ringing and there were stars dancing over your eyes and all you could feel was Eddie as he stilled inside you.

Eddie came as you did, hearing your moans and cries as you came undone was all it took for him to come crashing down.

You both held onto each other as you let your bodies come back down from whatever the hell kind of religious experience that had just been.

Neither of you spoke for a while. Sounds of your heavy breathing and whines filling Eddie's bedroom.

Eventually Eddie lifted his head from the crook of your neck. His hair sticking to his sweaty face. You giggled and pushed it off his face, much like he had done to you earlier.

"Are you okay?" he asked you, his eyes searching yours for any sign of pain or regret. He didn't find any. He was only met with overwhelming love.

You nodded and felt tears prick at your eyes, oh fuck.

"Hey, hey, whoa. Baby? What's wrong? Does something hurt?" Eddie asked you desperately. Totally unsure of what to do.

You shook your head quickly, "No, nothing- I just, that was a lot, and I love you and I cry sometimes you know this" You managed to get out through little cries as you let the tears fall.

Eddie couldn't help the laugh he let out, it was a mix of relief and happiness as he watched you. He pulled you tighter against you and held you until you calmed down.

"I'm gonna pull out now, okay? It might hurt a little sweetheart" He told you, taking hold of one of your hands before he slowly pulled out of you. You hissed at the feel of it, but you missed him filling you up more than it hurt.

"I know baby, it's okay. I'm gonna go and get a towel to clean you up, okay?" you nodded and Eddie moved off of you.

You only realised you had closed your eyes when you felt Eddie's hands on your legs. He had put his pyjama pants back on, but left the top off.

You let him part your legs again, running a warm washcloth over you as you whimpered at the overstimulation. He shushed you gently and assured he was nearly done. He pulled you up by your hands, into a sitting position at the end of the bed, and you wrapped your arms around his stomach, resting your head against him as he ran his hands through your hair, kissing your head.

Eddie hated to interrupt this moment but he knew you needed to go to the bathroom before you both fell into bed and went to sleep. He remorsefully told you so and he heard you groan, your grip tightening around him.

Eventually you did let go off him, he walked you to the bathroom and only left when you told him to go and get into bed, that you would be back soon.

You made your way back from the bathroom to see Eddie had changed the bed sheets. You didn't ask why.

Eddie smiled at you as you walked over to him, throwing yourself down and clawing at the duvet to get underneath it with him. He laughed and lifted the covers for you to climb under.

"Was that okay, sweetheart?" Eddie asked you quietly as you settled in next to him, your legs tangled together and your head resting on his chest. His arms keeping you pulled tightly against him.

"It was perfect, baby." you breathed out, tiredness quickly overtaking your whole body.

Eddie ran his hands over your back and whispered a "I love you" against your head.

"I love you too" you told him, before you fell asleep. Both of you a mess of limbs tangled together.

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grumpycakes · 1 year

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So as the house gets warmed up to go let me give a few updates I found out!

Voting Present LOWERS the number necessary to win, so it SHOULD be 219 with the full house but because Spartz votes Present it's 218

ARGUABLY if more Republicans vote Present but the 20 stick to their guns, the Democrats COULD win with 212 but Republicans don't want that

Buck who left for a non emergency medical procedure yesterday may not be back

We're starting up with only 275 reps present cause it's more than half but YIKES. Though I would assume more are showing up

a Californian Republican just got up to nominate McCarthy just to see how fast he loses. He's saying it's NOT ABOUT McCARTHY. FRIENDO YEAH IT IS. Lolll he's talking about serving the country with "Pure and Selfless intent~" and like idfk if any human can do taht.

ughghg the Republicans also keep bringing up fentinol overdoses and immigration and how it's going UnChEcKeD while we vote.

oh interesting, he thanked the national police (happily everyone got up and clapped for them) to pretend like Republicans care AT ALL about them.

... Sir why we talking about China, I don't think this is gonna move anybody you wanna move???

Jesus, he's trying to scare ppl into voting together cause the world is in DANGERRRR but like, THESE ARE THE PPL THAT REFUSED TO WEAR A MASK CAUSE IT MADE THEM UNCOMFY while people DIED. So loll ur talking for nothing sir. Hahahaha he's like, I agree w you shits but I WOrk w OtHeRsss and that's how you gotta WoRk!!! lolll

Oh here we go, telling the Dems they're on the EDGE of a VERY IMPORTANT VICTORY. Loll sure you lil dipshit. OH OH RUDE he just said, looking to the Dems I realize i haven't met many of you cause you're not here, voting by proxy. WOW, rumbles in the crowd and then the Clerk had to bang the gavel and be like HEY, UR SUPPOSED TO DIRECT COMMENTS TO THE BENCH.

Ur useless dude, this is too long of a speech. And stupidly blaming all of it on the Dems

South Carolina Rep is up for the Democrats

Awww he thanked the Clerk who's been running this circus and all the Dems rose and the Clerk smiled and mouthed thank you.

He's talking about learning lessons and working to be a better govt but flowery-er. Ah okay he's bringing up Jan 6. Resiliency. USA was made for liberty, justice, and freedom. Pointing out that it's the first time in over 100 years that they can't figure out who to vote for. The goodness of the american people is at stake??? Jeffries is a good dude i guess lol.

Oh lord almighty Gaetz is up and saying HE TAKES EXCEPTION TO THE CALIFORNIA REPS STATEMENTSSS. LOLL oh shit and he's saying that McCarthy is only speaker if he GETS THE VOTES and he DON'T HAVE THE VOTES. And he's saying it's vanity making McCarthy keep going. LOLL AND I THINK THE DEMS CLAPPED FOR THAT. hahaha ppl are yelling at him and order had to be called. HAHAH Gaetz just called him LaBron James but that would mean that McCarthy was a WINNER AT SOME POINT.

Oh dude don't fucking bring up PURITY you lily white fuck. Damn he's just calling out his own party. He's saying their intentions when trying to negotiate w him weren't PUUUREEE. Again humans, nothings gonna be pure my dude.

Mr SQUINTS IS BACK!!!

Bottom line, they don't trust McCarthy, saying it's for the ppl

WOAH WAIT HE JUST NOMINATED JIM JORDAN AGAIN, NO

Boebert is up to nominate Hern. She keeps pointing out that he was unanimously voted as chairman for something and that he's gonna be united. Blahblahblah inflation, republican talking points. Oh yay quickly ended

OH SHIT AND WE'RE VOTING ROUND 12!!!

#political o'clock #politics #us politics #speaker of the house vote 2023 #12:35PM EST

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pollyna · 1 month

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Mav stays. He stays after Ice hugs him and asks who's the better pilot. He stays over for dinner, sharing the table with Sarah and people he doesn't care to know because all that matters is Tom. He stays even after Ice asks, writes down, about work and if he doesn't have anywhere else better to be, but Mav smiles and says no, because nowhere is better than here.

Mav stays after dinner and asks, with all smiles and politeness, to let him help Tom out to prepare for bed, and no, no, even the bathroom part isn't going to be a problem—we saw each other in much worse conditions! They end up sharing a sink, brushing their teeth, Ice without a shirt on, and Mav hugging him from behind. I missed you, he whispers against his wingman's shoulder before kissing a freckle, and I missed you too, the man signs in the mirror. He stays even after, when it's barely eight o'clock, but Ice is too tired to stay awake. He stays, and Tom makes space for him in his bed, as he did every day of his life, making space for Mav and what Mav needed the most. Who is he to say no? He stays even when Ice tries to protest, and even when they are both so close to crying, that's inevitable. He stays and shares a bed and a pillow, and Ice is alive under Mav's fingerprints.

He stays for every single time he couldn't and he stays even when Warlock is looking at him from the other side of the breakfast table. He stays until he can't anymore, and even then, when he has to go, it’s under protest, and he would scream, cry, and beg to stay and not move from Ice's side because he has to be there; he can't leave his wingman behind. He refused to.

“See you later,” Mav says, kissing both of Ice's cheeks and his nose.

“See you later, Mav." Ice answers, smiling as brightly as the sun.

Mav stays until he can't, then he has to leave, and then it's time for Ice to go, and Mav can't help but think that if he had stayed, maybe Tom would have too.

#if (my) love could have saved you you would have lived forever #pete maverick mitchell #tom iceman kazansky #icemav #canon divergence #and #canon compliant

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balioc · 2 months

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Oh, boy! It's Education Theory o'Clock again!

...I have a lot of thoughts on this topic. At some point, when I'm less busy and tired, I should probably try to write them up. Natively, I'm one of the school-is-a-nightmare-prison people, like so many others in this little discourse-sphere -- but I'm married to a middle school teacher, so I regularly encounter both the good arguments from the other side and the facts on the ground, and those things have altered my perspective somewhat.

But I am, in fact, busy and tired. So for now I'll just content myself with saying:

School is an institution that serves many, many, many purposes at the same time. A lot of those purposes are load-bearingly important. (A couple of years ago, I wrote this about college, and...it's double-plus true for primary and secondary schools.) If you don't try to account for all of that stuff in your theory of What School Is and How School Works, you will generate incoherent garbage thoughts. If you have a New Concept for school entailing top-down design that is optimized for a single function (like "increasing test scores" or "causing kids to love learning" or whatever), you'd better have a plan for how you're going to do all the other important things that schools do. And even if you think that some of those things aren't actually important or necessary, you'd better have a plan for dealing with all the people who disagree. Because...

-----

...school, as it exists today, is an inherently political institution. Both in the "soft" sense that everyone has strong opinions about what it's supposed to do and how it's supposed to work, and in the "hard" sense that it is actually controlled by democratically-accountable governments. (This is double-plus true in the US, where it is controlled by local governments, and therefore doesn't even have the protective insulation of a massive bureaucracy.) Everything about the way schools work is a compromise brokered amongst ideologues and self-dealers. Everything about the way schools work involves a lot of decision-makers trying not to get yelled at by the yelliest people around. If you're looking for elegant purpose-driven top-down design, you won't find it. You could probably make a case that any elegant purpose-driven top-down design would be better than the thing we actually have, but getting there would require finding a way to remove the political element.

-----

Most importantly: public schools are (1) compulsory, (2) universal, and (3) for children. [People who are legally children, anyway, whether or not they are actual children in whatever sense matters to you.]

This means that they cannot let students leave, and they have to keep control of all the students that they aren't allowing to leave.

In the most literal not-a-judgment-but-a-fact sense, they are indeed prisons. They are coercively keeping people inside. They have to do that thing, as per their most fundamental mandate within the current system. The alternatives involve letting kids run around unsupervised, and/or failing to give some kids even the most cursory kind of education, and those things are absolute non-starters under present conditions.

All the normal institutions-for-adults operate on the principle of -- If you really don't want to be here, you can leave, and deal with whatever consequences there may be for leaving. This is not an option for schools, and that fact accounts for...everything.

Classroom structure is built around the necessity of keeping the most-hostile, least-engaged student in the class present and supervised, and then trying to prevent him from disrupting things for everyone else. Because the obvious solution that any other institution would use -- "just cut him loose, he doesn't want to be here and we don't want him here" -- isn't available.

(I once talked to my wife about the rationed bathroom access thing, which is one of the most flagrant nightmare-prison aspects of the school experience. Her response was, "If you let kids use the bathroom whenever they want, as much as they want, then you don't have mandatory universal education anymore. Some of them will never return to the classroom, because they don't want to be there." Which is...obviously true.)

So you have something that replicates many of the features of prison, because it has to accomplish the same basic tasks that prison accomplishes. Yay, Foucault.

#education

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lovelybucky1 · 7 months

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The Doctor is In

Kinktober Day 11- Threesome

warnings: AFAB!Reader, student/teacher relationship, dom/sub dynamics, oral sex (f and m receiving), vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, snowballing, dirty talk, smoking, alcohol consumption, robert x lawrence, 18+ minors DNI

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When Lawrence confided in Robert about his recent dry spell, he was never expecting this to come from that conversation. Robert had told him he has a mistress, one Robert is certain his wife knows about but has yet to confront him about. She's young, pretty, bright, and has an interest in physics- or at least is attracted enough to Robert to pretend to care about his ramblings.

Lawrence was skeptical. He doesn't know many men who are eager to share their woman, but Robert has never been like most men. Maybe it's a kink for him to have another man fuck his mistress. Robert was open about what the two of you get up to, and it's safe to say that neither of you are very reserved in the bedroom.

After thinking about the offer for a day or two, Lawrence agreed. Robert already had a time and place in mind. Seven o'clock on Friday at his house for dinner. His wife would be away with the kids until Sunday, giving them the perfect opportunity to explore.

Friday came quickly and Lawrence found himself standing on Robert's door step with a bottle of wine in hand. Robert came to the door and greeted Lawrence with a smile, then lead him into the kitchen. Once there, he saw your behind bent over in front of the oven.

You take the chicken out of the oven and place it on top of the stove. Lawrence thought it was a bit odd to have a mistress cook in the wife's kitchen, but he supposed you and Robert were playing house for the weekend.

You turn around and saw both men standing at the kitchen table. Your face lit up when you saw Lawrence, but his stomach dropped when he saw you.

"Dr. Lawrence!" you say excitedly, coming over to both men. Lawrence stares down at you with his mouth slightly agape.

"You two know each other?" Robert asks.

"Oh, yes, he's one of my professors," you grin. "When you said you had a friend from work joining us, I was afraid it was gonna be one of those weird old guys."

Lawrence snaps out of his shock and looks over at Robert. "I didn't know your..." he feels it's inappropriate to call you a mistress to your face, "was a student."

"I didn't think it mattered," Robert counters.

"Please come sit, I made chicken," you say, drawing both men's attention.

Robert sits down at the head of the table with Lawrence to his right, leaving the seat to his left for you. The table is already set neatly and you bring over the tray with the chicken on it. The meat is steaming and the herbs are fragrant. There's mashed potatoes, a salad, and enough wine to leave the three of you drunk.

You make polite conversation over dinner, and Lawrence can't help but find it a bit humorous that you're making a date out of an arranged hookup. He is enjoying himself, though, so he can't complain too much.

The conversation revolves around work, and each time you speak, Lawrence is reminded that you're his student. His kind, polite, curious student who always brings him an apple and sits in the first row. You are a brilliant student and your work is always impressive. He never thought you would be the type to get mixed up in an extramarital affair with Dr. Oppenheimer, but Lawrence supposes he doesn't really know the true you.

Your food is delicious, the best Lawrence has had in a while. He thinks to himself that you would make a good wife, then chastises himself for thinking that way about a student.

"What's the matter, Lawrence?" Robert asks, breaking Lawrence's train of thought.

Lawrence looks between the two of you. "I'm sorry, I'm just a little nervous," he says. There's a blush rising to his cheeks and he feels shy under your attention.

"Don't be nervous, Doctor. We'll take good care of you," you smile reassuringly.

You reach over and grab his hand. Your fingers are delicate and your hand is small compared to his. His heart races and he suddenly has the urge for more wine.

"I suppose since we're on the topic, we should discuss how the rest of the night is going to go," Robert says.

"That's a good idea," Lawrence agrees.

"To get the awkward question out of the way," Robert starts, as if this won't all be awkward. "Do you fuck men?"

Luckily Lawrence's mouth was clear of food because it would have been lodged in his airway after hearing the question. Lawrence clears his throat and looks between you and Robert.

"I... haven't."

"Are you interested?"

"In you?" Robert nods. "I don't know... I haven't really thought of it."

"We'll start off slow, then."

Lawrence's head is spinning. His coworker just asked him if he wanted to have sex and now he has to continue on living his life as if that's normal. As if he's not intrigued.

"What kinds of things do you like, Doctor?" you ask.

"Um..." Lawrence says as his mind races to find an answer.

"Any particular turn-ons you have?" Robert asks.

When he still doesn't answer, you speak up. "Well, I can tell you what I like and you can tell me what you think about them."

"Yeah," Lawrence nods. "That sounds good."

You scoot closer to him and rest your chin on your hand, somehow making yourself look even cuter.

"I like older men who have experience. They know what they like and aren't afraid to take it. I like a strong hand to guide and to please me. And I want to be worshipped." Lawrence listens intently with wide eyes. "How do you feel about that?"

"I, um," he clears his throat, "I like it. All of that. Sounds good to me."

You smile widely and look over at Robert. "How about Dr. Lawrence and I take turns on you, dear?" he says. You agree excitedly.

"You don't have to call me that," Lawrence says, feeling unusually timid.

"Call you what?" you ask.

"Doctor."

You stand up from your chair and push Lawrence's plate back so you can perch yourself on the table in front of him. Your legs are crossed but your skirt still shows a fair amount of thigh. It's nothing Lawrence hasn't seen before, but now he's allowed to look. Your feet hang between his parted legs and he traces the seam of your stockings with his eyes.

"But I like calling you that," you say, batting your eyelashes. "But I could call you professor if you'd prefer."

Lawrence's eyes flick over to Roberts, searching for signs of discomfort or objection, but only found a smirk.

"This is... inappropriate," he says. "You're my student."

There is a slight pout to your bottom lip. "Doesn't that make it better? I've seen the way you look at me in class, Doctor. I bet you've thought about what would happen if I came to your office and asked for extra credit."

Lawrence shouldn't be surprised. Robert wouldn't spend time with a girl if she wasn't a firecracker. You just look so sweet and innocent, it's difficult to fathom these dirty words are coming out of your mouth.

You uncross your legs and part your thighs, giving him a peak of your delicate panties. "No one has to know, Doctor."

You're a seductress disguised as an angel. You're the snake tempting him to take a bite of the apple and let the delicious juice drip down his chin.

Lawrence slides his chair back to make space in front of the table, then drops to his knees in front of you. He's staring directly at your clothed cunt and he can practically smell your desire from there.

"What are you doing, Lawrence?" Robert asks.

Lawrence looks over at him and expects him to be angry, but he is smirking. "You're not going to fuck my woman on the dinner table. You'll take her to the bedroom like a gentleman."

It's a bit ironic that Robert wants Lawrence to be a gentleman and fuck his mistress in his wife's bed, but he's the guest here, he's in no position to argue.

Lawrence nods and rises to his feet. He holds out his hand to help you down from the table, which you eagerly accept. You lead him through the house and up the stairs to the bedroom, Robert following close behind.

You turn the lamp on and turn to the two men standing in the center of the room and sit at the foot of the bed. "Daddy?" you ask, voice sweet as honey.

"Yes, dear?"

"Would you take my shoes and stockings off please?"

Everything about this situation surprises Lawrence. You call Robert Daddy? He is eager to kneel at your feet and take off your shoes and stockings when you are perfectly capable of doing so yourself?

Once your pantyhose is balled up next to your shoes on the floor, Robert begins to kiss up your legs. You hum with contentment as he does so, but you don't look down at him, no. You're looking at Lawrence.

"Come here, Doctor," you say, beckoning him forward.

He crosses the room to stand next to you. You reach out to grasp his tie and you pull him down to your level. His breath hitches in his throat at the display of dominance, eyes glued to your lips.

"I like when Daddy's in charge, but I always get what I want. He spoils me rotten, but that's the way I like it. Daddy knows what happens when he denies me, doesn't he?" you ask.

Robert peaks up from underneath your skirt. "I've learned my lesson," he says before resuming his exploration of your thighs.

"Are you going to give me what I want?" you ask, turning your attention back to Lawrence.

He swallows thickly. "Yes."

You grin. "Wonderful. Now, take off your shirt."

You let him go and he stands up straight. Lawrence is surprised that you're so demanding, almost entitled, but he's working open the buttons on his shirt anyway.

He reveals his pale chest dusted with light hair. His pink nipples are peaked from the cool air in the room and he feels a flush rise to his chest under your gaze. As he opens his shirt further, you can see the happy trail that leads underneath the waistband of his pants, and your desire for him grows.

While you watch Lawrence, Robert pushes your panties to the side to touch your pussy. He gently strokes your clit with his finger and tongue, caresses your folds with slow licks, and dips his fingers just the slightest bit inside you. He's teasing you, but you're not worked up enough to complain about it yet.

"Now the pants," you order.

Lawrence slips off his shoes and undoes his belt, letting his pants fall to his ankles. You lick your lips at the sight of him standing in his briefs.

"Daddy," you say, pulling him away from your cunt by his hair.

"Yes, dear?"

"Take your clothes off too."

Robert does as he's told and undresses. You watch Lawrence trying not to watch Robert and it amuses you. Once both men are left in their underwear, you pull down your skirt and take off your blouse, leaving you in your own undergarments.

You stand up and step between the two men. You place a hand on both of their chests and urge them closer. Lawrence hesitantly puts his hands on your waist and Robert grabs your hips from behind. Both of them explore your body with your hands, and when they touch, Lawrence gasps.

"No need to be so shy, Doctor," you say while looking into his eyes. "Daddy doesn't bite."

Robert tucks his face into the crook of your neck and does just that; he sinks his teeth into the sensitive skin and you gasp. Your back arches and your chest presses against Lawrence's.

The man in front of you looks down at your breasts, almost entranced by them. You notice, of course.

"You can touch them if you want," you say.

Lawrence studies your face for any sign of hesitation, but all he sees is you batting your doe eyes at him. He slides his hands up your torso and cups your breasts in his large hands. You hear him let out a shaky breath and both you and Robert chuckle.

"He's so easy, Daddy," you giggle.

Robert wraps his arms around your waist and presses his chest against your back. "It's been a while for him, honey. Don't be mean."

Lawrence's cheeks are a delicious pink and it makes you want to tease him even more. You run your hand down his chest, stomach, over the fuzz under his navel, and over the bulge in his briefs. His body jolts at the contact, so you do it again.

"Fuck," he whispers.

"That's a naughty word, Doctor. I didn't think someone like you would do something like this."

Your hand slips underneath the waistband and you grasp his cock. You give it one firm stroke and when he lets out a groan, you grin.

"Haven't you tortured Dr. Lawrence enough for one night, dear?" Robert asks. He's phrasing it to sound like he's trying to benefit Lawrence, but you know he's getting impatient.

"I just want one more thing, Daddy," you say, looking over your shoulder at him.

"Anything for you," he smiles.

You have a devilish twinkle in your eye, one Robert knows well. "I want you and Dr. Lawrence to kiss."

Lawrence gawks, his eyes flicking up to Robert's to see if he's also shocked. To his surprise, Robert looks as if you've just asked him the weather.

“You��re a scientist, Ernie. Do it in the name of research,” Robert suggests. “Or in the name of getting your dick wet. Whatever works for you.”

"Okay," Lawrence says hesitantly.

Robert moves from behind you to stand next to Lawrence. He gently places his hand on the taller man's hip and leans close. You watch eagerly as Robert reaches up to press his lips to Lawrence's. Lawrence is stiff, but he's not rejecting the kiss. He's pliant for Robert, allowing him to take control.

The kiss doesn't last long and there's no tongue, but it was enough to satisfy you. When the two men part, they both look over at you. Robert's pupils are lust-blown and Lawrence looks like he could pass out.

"Was that what you wanted?" Robert asks.

"It was perfect, Daddy," you smile. "Now Dr. Lawrence has earned my pussy."

You scamper off to the bed and lay down on your stomach. Your feet hang over the edge of the bed a bit so there's enough room for Robert by the pillows.

Robert walks around the bed, taking off his underwear before climbing onto the mattress and sitting in front of you. His cock is hard and leaking, and you bite your lip in anticipation of what's to come.

"You tell him what to do, Daddy," you say while looking up at Robert through your lashes.

With Robert's legs positioned on either side of your head, you open your mouth and take the tip of his cock into your mouth. He lets out a groan when you suck gently.

"Why don't you come give our good girl what she wants," Robert says over your head to Lawrence.

Wordlessly, Lawrence steps forward and gently grasps the waistband of your panties. You move your legs to make it easier to take them off and Lawrence is met with the sight of your dripping cunt.

"Fuck," he whispers to himself.

Lawrence takes off his own underwear and begins to stroke his dick while looking at your ass. Robert watches him with a raised eyebrow, wondering when he'll get to it.

"Eat her out first. You can't fuck her dry," Robert says.

"She certainly isn't dry," Lawrence says as he kneels behind you and spreads your legs apart.

You squirm a bit when he leans in, his hot breath tickling your inner thighs. He starts by licking up your pussy, vaguely aware that Robert did this earlier. He can't tell if he's tasting your juices, Robert's spit, or a mixture of the two, but it's intoxicating.

He teases your clit with his tongue while you do the same to Robert's cock. You can't help the moan that escapes your mouth when Lawrence works his tongue into you. His hands grip your thighs as he buries his face deeper into you, making his glasses dig into your skin.

It's good, too good, but you know getting fucked by him will be better. You pull off of Robert and look up at him with a pout. "Make him stop, Daddy. I wanna cum on his dick, not his face."

The idea of you soaking his face makes Lawrence groan into your pussy and he is reluctant to stop. You're clearly impatient because before he has the change to remove his tongue, you're reaching back and pulling him away by his hair.

Lawrence whines at the tug on his roots. It's an accident, an entirely involuntary reaction and one you will file away for later.

"You heard her," Robert says, giving Lawrence the green light.

You work your way farther down Robert's cock as Lawrence kneels on the bed behind you, positioning himself properly. The tip of the cock hits the back of your throat and you gag. Robert looks down at you sympathetically and cups your jaw, stroking it soothingly.

"Take it all, gorgeous. Don't choke on it, I know you can do it."

Lawrence would be lying if he said Robert's dirty talk to you wasn't also affecting him. His cock drips as he nears your entrance and he is certain he won't last long. His tip bumps against your folds and you tense up at first, but then relax.

"Go ahead, Doctor," Robert says with a teasing lilt. "Fuck her."

Taking directions from Robert makes Lawrence's cock throb, but he pointedly ignores the implications of that in favor of relishing in the feeling of your tight cunt as he pushes into you.

He goes slow as to not hurt you, but your hole swallows him up greedily so he figures he doesn't have to worry about that. Once he's seated fully inside of you, he lets out the breath he was holding.

He braces himself on his hands and knees and begins to rock his hips. After so long with only his hand, your cunt feels like heaven. Even the friction of his lower stomach on your ass makes him dizzy.

At the head of the bed, your lips are pressed around the base of Robert's cock and you're focusing on trying not to choke. He's praising you like he always does, but it's hard to hear him over the blood rushing in your ears.

Your lipstick stains his cock, marking him in a way that makes Robert's possessive hindbrain go wild. He tries to be considerate when you suck him off like this, but it's so difficult to stop himself from bucking into your mouth and making you take him.

Pretty soon, you're getting fucked from both ends. Lawrence is pounding into your cunt, dick dragging along that sweet spot inside of you that fuels the flame inside of you. Robert instructed you to relax your throat so he could grab your hair and work you over his cock at his pace.

This is always your favorite part of the scene, when your bossy, bratty demeanor is replaced by a needy, submissive one. You're still getting what you want, but the punishing strokes of both men make it feel like they're the ones calling the shots.

Your whines and moans are muffled by Robert's cock, but both he and Lawrence are making noise freely.

"You feel so good," Robert praises. "My pretty little girl."

Lawrence doesn't do any talking, save for the occasional swear. There's mostly heavy breathing and small moans coming from behind you, and that just won't do.

"Spank her, Ernie. Makes her even tighter," Robert says.

"Can't get much tighter," he says, breathless. He brings his hand back and delivers a slap to your outer thigh. You choke on a cry and like Robert said you would, you got tighter. "Shit."

"Her cunt feel good?" Robert asks. He knows how hot it makes you when he talks about you like you're not there.

"So fucking good."

"You like sticking your dick in students, Doctor?" Lawrence moans low and long. He drapes himself over your back to rut into you with a newfound desperation. "You're never going to look at her the same."

Robert's right. The two of you have ruined Lawrence's life. He won't be able to teach or even think about physics without thinking of his student with the tightest pussy he's ever fucked.

"I'm gonna cum," Lawrence says. He's embarrassed that he was so quick, but he held it off for as long as he could.

"You better pull out," Robert says, still forcing you down on his cock. "You wouldn't want to knock her up, would you?"

Lawrence curses and quickly sits up to jerk himself off over top of you. Robert watches intently, ignoring you while Lawrence squirts his cum on your lower back. He groans and his head lolls back, the fatigue and relief hitting him once he's ridden through his orgasm.

Lawrence stands at the foot of the bed to catch his breath, watching the scene in front of him. "You're not finished," Robert says, his voice noticeably more airy now. "You're not done until she cums for you."

Resuming his earlier position, Lawrence eats you out with the intent of having you soak his face. He rubs your clit with his thumb, fucks you with his tongue, and moans into your cunt, all while you get face fucked at the head of the bed.

"Good fucking girl. You're gonna make me cum," Robert says to you. "Where do you want it? On your face?" You try to shake your head but Robert's hand on the back on your neck makes it difficult. "You want to swallow it, don't you?"

You moan loudly and nod the best you can. Robert smirks down at you and his body relaxes as he prepares to cum down your throat. You allow yourself to be used and focus on the pleasure of Lawrence's tongue inside you.

Like the last time he got you close, it didn't take much time at all. Before you know it, your cunt gushes all over his face and you cry out. Lawrence's mouth floods with your cum and he drinks it down eagerly.

With one particularly deep thrust, the first spurt of cum hits the back of your throat, making you gag. You're helpless to do anything but take it, though you don't swallow yet. You know Daddy likes to see it in your mouth.

Distracted by Robert's orgasm, you don't realize that Lawrence is still working your pussy until it becomes painfully sensitive. Robert pulls out of your mouth and lets go of your neck and your body jolts, trying to escape the stimulation.

"Stop," you whine, but its muddled by the puddle of cum on your tongue.

Lawrence immediately pulls away and you look at him from over your shoulder. He's sweaty: hair wet, chest glistening, and glasses foggy. He looks absolutely wrecked, but you don't get to admire him for long because Robert pulls your attention back to him.

"Hasn't anyone told you not to talk with your mouth full, little girl?" he asks, holding your jaw. "Open up, let me see."

You do as you're told and stick out your tongue so he can see the pearly liquid. He smiles, satisfied, but it morphs into something wicked.

"Why don't you go give Dr. Lawrence a kiss, dear? Thank him for making you cum."

Robert gives you a look that screams don't question me. You sit up, legs shaking, and turn to where Lawrence stands at the foot of the bed. You don't say a word, but you look up at him with wide, tantalizing eyes.

This time, Lawrence doesn't look to Robert before making his move. He ducks down and cups your jaw with his large hand before slotting his lips against yours. You escalate the kiss by pressing your tongue to the seam of his lips and when he allows you entrance, you let the cum flow from your mouth to his.

Lawrence whimpers, surely disliking the bitter taste, but swallows it quickly to get it out of his mouth. Despite that, he keeps kissing you for a second longer.

"Did you like it, Doctor?" you ask once you part.

Lawrence isn't certain if you're asking about the sex or the cum.

"Yes," he breathes.

You smile widely and look over your shoulder back at Robert, who is still sitting shamelessly nude and spread on the bed. The three of you sit in silence for a moment before Lawrence starts to redress.

No one offered him a place in the bed for the night and he certainly wasn't going to ask to stay. You crawl back up by Robert and cuddle into his side, laying your head on his wife's pillow. You both watch as Lawrence rebuttons his shirt and slips on his shoes without untying them.

Once dressed, Lawrence looks at the two of you and clears his throat, suddenly feeling awkward. "Thank you for having me," he says.

"Our pleasure," you giggle.

Robert reaches over to the night stand and takes a cigarette out of his case and lights it. He takes a long, slow drag of it before speaking.

"See you on Monday, Doctor."

Lawrence smiles sheepishly and walks out of the bedroom and down the stairs. Work certainly is going to be different from now on. Most notably, no one will be able to address him without him popping a boner in the middle of a lecture.

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