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#pls i have class for 2 hours and ive been awake since 4 am
bubbled-clouds · 1 year
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it’s me and my lack of self-awareness against the world
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tellmesomethinggg · 4 years
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****
linking this here bc it was technically a journal? i just don’t want it on my notes anymore and if i ever (likely not to) want to re-read for whatever reason. please note that i knew people would read this so things are censored and are the basic version. also there was a switch at one point from **** to chris because i didn’t want things to be read
(for later when i got time lmao)
Matt is a piece of shit that just wants to fuck -Chloe
well fuck
here goes nothing
the plan: don’t get drunk bc i got shit to do early next morning and ill tell him tomorrow when i do get drunk. spoiler alert that didn’t work
Gaby (coles gf) came too btw
so i had a smirnoff ice and said no more than two shots after so id be buzzed but not fully drunk (i ended up having three and was very much drunk)
me jon and gaby we’re talking about guys and i mentioned something about liking a guy or some shit and gaby looks at matt and then me and confirms it with me. then she tells me that apparently when she met me and a few other friends at the beach last quarter, that she predicted the two of us would end up together and told cole this. im like wtf how and she claims she’s psychic lol
later, Matt and i are on the sack and he looks at me and goes do you like me and im thinking well fuck so i say yes and he’s like well shit sorry but (and then i forgot exactly what he said) something along the lines of it’s not mutual or it’s not the right timing (i forgot okay) and then he gets up after a bit to go to the bathroom (I’m pretty sure cole went out too) and then me gaby and Jon have a chisme session and they think that he does like me but whatever
so the guys come back and at this point i really need to pee again so matt offers to take me and we start talking and he’s all, oh im sorry if i led you on and shit and im like it’s alright ill get over it, it just might be a bit awkward for me for a bit. but then on our way back from the bathroom he asks me , do you wanna at least kiss your crush at least one time and im like uhh yeah so he kisses me and then we start talking but i forgot about what and im kinda dizzy so he says, oh let’s sit on the couches for a bit before we go back, so we do and somehow we kiss again and then start making out
and at this point im like bitch there’s no way you don’t like me like why would you do that if you didn’t
so we finally go back and it’s been some time so the rest of em are obviously curious
matt goes with cole to the bathroom again and the three of us have a chisme session otra vez and they’re like yeah he fucking likes you he’s prob just scared bc of his last relationship
cole comes back in and basically backs up their side based on his convo he just had with matt
and so it’s decided that we’ll both sleep on the sack, Jon sleeps on his bed and the other two together in coles bed
he comes back and we all “go to sleep” but I push for him to hold me like he usually does whenever we sleep together and around like 2,3 am we both start making out again and just like uhhhh
also we’re both very much drunk but of course i tend to remember things whenever ive gotten drunk, however, he did not and so now we gotta talk and figure shit out and go from there
also im not telling Emilou or Hanna yet until we figure things out so
yeah
fuck
alrighty, so after last night, ive decided to do absolutely nothing about it and decided to just let things play out the way things do. i don’t wanna say something and ruin our friendship that we have bc i trust him a lot and like hanging out with him, so, i guess the end of this note for now, unless the situation changes anytime soon
Can Tim see what I write on this?     -Chloe
Yes -Janet
Hi Tim!
-Chloe
Tim pls respond.
-Chloe
Hi Chloe! Sorry I have been busy at home LOL
He responded I’m so happy!
-Chloe
FYI im just going to add things at the top of the note so that its easiwr to see stuff when i add it bc then otherwise youd have to scroll a ton
and I’m dating shit so i know when I wrote stuff and my memory and yeahhh
FEB 15 1 pm
chillin in alp so lets get this chisme
alrighty so last night i stayed the night in pratts but it wasnt just me so calmate, it was me and jon bc long story short i was too lazy/dizzy to get up and jons roommate had her bf over. basically we both shared the bed, not a lot of physical contact but whateva
brb
anyways, there was also one point where he was watching a movie from his childhood and idk what tf it was but he was shocked that i havent seen those movies, so apparently now im gonna watch them so i told him for payback we gotta watch disney movies lmao
oh also! i fucking got back to my room and took a shower to get ready for class, and when hanna gets back from class shes all like oh you slept in HiS rOoM huh and i was like uhhh yeah and told her the truth like i was too lazy and dizzy to get up and then she didnt really say anything but uhhhh yikes
and then i mentioned this to emilou later when we were walking to class and shes like yeah idk why she did that that was weird and i was thinking like thank God she doesnt think the same as hanna bc shes also slept in his room on the bean bag a few times
FEB 14 2pm
heyyy its valentines day and guess whos still single and workinggg
so uhhh last night, around 1, both me and pratt finished our shit (hw and studying) and im wide awake so im like hey, brooklyn 99? (because i got him into the show and i love rewatching the show bc its sooo good) and hes down so we start watching in his room. were both on his bed but were sitting (for the tie being) and eventually i decide to lay down and use one of his pillows but its the flat pillow so i attempt to steal his other one, which he protests and we lowkey wrestle over it and eventually i fail ugh and i fall over in frustration and land my head on his knee and then just quit and stay there, but get this, he just deals with it and lays on top of me, like his head is on my side. granted we both also have pillows so like his pillow is in between me and him and same for me but like ughhh
and eventually i fall asleep for like an episode (?) and wake up right before 3 am, and then decide hey sleep sounds important bc i have an 8 am and so does he, so i sit up but im too lazy to get up right away so i sit and go through twitter and shit so chris just lays down with his head on my leg and i set my arm down on his chest and he falls asleep for a few minutes and then i finish going through my social media and every part of me doesnt wanna move, but im also in a position that would be uncomfortable to fall asleep in so i wake him up and then go back to my room
oh and the other thing i forgot was that for a good couple hours we were texting and joking around and yeahhh
i feel like im reading a lot into what happens but at the same time, like i doubt id be this comfortable doing shit with guys like this and idk about him, but like sometimes i wonder you know?
also, saturday night, as far as i know, its just me and him going to the basketball game bc idk who else is going (eye emoji insert here bc im on my computer lmao) so we'll see what happens
FEB 10 11am
okay soooo last night,
the plan was to get buzzed, just me and matt and watch Brooklyn 9-9 but then Anthony and emilou joined us so never mind. after a bit, Anthony leaves so he can answer a phone call and pratt offers me shot #1 and not emilou (she’s laying on the bean bag, I’m on his roommates bed chillin behind her so she can’t see what’s up)
we take two and im slightly buzzed but i think “hey lets see how much we can take before she notices” and he’s down so uhhh let’s get this
later we have to include Anthony and he’s down to see how much we can take and he just lets us continue, i get to 4 shots and he finishes the bottle so i can’t have a 5th
brb im gonna go eat with him
okay im back now...
anyways were both pretty out of it, emilou still hasnt noticed and anthony finds this all funny i assume and so do i , and eventually she finds out and then the two of them leave i guess around 2 am and the two of us are both on the bean bag and were both tired and drunk and drunk me like petting his hair and apparently holding his hand and well yeah i kinda hate drunk me bc if that wasnt obvious enough lmao :/
continuin, we basically end up cuddled together most of the night until we both kind of sober up hella early in the morning and kind of separate a bit
and so in the morning guess who brought it uppp and i at least have an excuse that i was drunk and not thinking and just kinda doing whatever drunk me wanted to do (but omggg his hair is so fucking nice to play with omg) anyways imma just die real quick bc idk what happens now
also since no one else was in the room literally no one else knows about this and i think were keeping it that way bc lets be honest if anyone found out about that i think id be screwed for secret keeping and then well yeah
FEB 8 1AM
i remembered:
sunday 2-3
i forgot this happened but before I ended up in chris’s room i was chillin upstairs watching tv and then he came out on the phone with some one and long story short he said something on the phone to his friend along the lines of “you’re gonna have me in your life for a long time” and when he was saying that i was looking at him bc soy chismosa and i was curious and he winked at me and I died
Monday 2-4
so the other thing that happened was I had lunch/dinner with him before my writing class and no recuerdo que decimos, but uhhhh yeah
i like hanging out with him
also, just got back from his room and am more convinced that he may not like me but actually just sees me as a friend but at the same time maybe he does but IDK
i hate feelings and it’d be so much easier if i didn’t have them sometimes lmaooo
FEB 7 5-7 PM
so im currently in the room rn so im gonna try to make this as chronological as possible
saturday 2-2
alrighty so mind you this is the day ive volunteered with ship and have spent the whole day there, (i dont remember why i thought this was relevant :/)
so saturday night, i go to work in his room around 8 (?) so i can work on my essay and finish my shit bc he has a bean bag thats hella comfy to work on
andd so later on, jocelyn comes in to watch anime with him and then after i finish we all decide to watch gabriel iglesias and ended up squishing together on the bean bag with me in the middle of the two of them
and so were all chillin there, laughing whatever and at one point chris fucking pratt puts his head on my shoulder for a little bit and i dIeDddd
and eventually i fall asleep when we start watching emperors new groove and mind you im fucking next to chris pratt like uhhhh my GOD
so i wake up once the movies over and then go to the bathroom and come back and by then he has taken over the whole bean bag and im sad that i cant just get back and go back to sleep so i go back to my room
(hanna doesnt know what time i get back i think and im pretty sure it was around4 am) (emilous also not here bc she went home for the weekend)
sunday 2-3
so i decide hey i was productive yesterday and decide to return to his room to work on shit and try to get as much done before work in theevening
i finish around 1/2? and then i tell him im bored and i wanna do something before work but idk what so he says lets go to the rec room and its just the two of us and its chillin and he puts me on his story playing pool lmao
and then i go to work :(
but then THEN later after work i go for a run and end up back in his room and theres a couple other people there and so were all chilling (mind you this is around midnight)
and somehow i end up falling asleep on the bean bag next to this girl jon from my hall and (this is a secret in a secret) but i hear her get up at one point and then chris pratt then joins me and during the night im tossing and turning and leaning on him a bit (ughhhh i died a shit ton)
monday 2-4
so in the morning around 720 or so i wake up pay dumb and am like oh whend you get here and he explains and then hes like yeah i dont really know the girl who slept in my bed (one of jons friends) and i figured since im more comfortable with you id just move here (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me upppp) [please note that when i say fuck me up i dont mean that type of fuck]
alrighty thats what i remember that i havent told you, and then the other bit from the screen record was tuesday and now its thursday and here i am in guess whos room again
possibly staying the night lmao
but jons also here so its not like im staying the night staying the night
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matronaa · 6 years
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Jungkook “fuckboy?” drabble
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Word count: 1,637
Genre: Fluff/mentions of smut?
Okay look its about 1 in the morning while im writing this and i just got done literally scrolling thru @jungshookz  e n t i r e page and honestly ive been delusionally laughing over her stories for like an hour and a half like the tattooartist!jungkook fic legit killed me i love it  and i’m probably going to force my friend to check her out because legit i love it so much and she seems like such a funny person and if she sees this 1) ily and ur writing and i wanna be friends but idk how to start a conversation because im a awKwARd bEan and 2) im sorry for probably spamming ur notifications with likes okay i couldnt help it so now im inspired for the first time in a while to write but im way to loopy to put together an actual fic so enjoy this ig
Okay i should stop rambling (okay just note that im so sleep deprived that i had to google ‘words for excessive talking’ to remember the word rambling because im an idiot and i cant think and ooo its 1:11 am rn make a wish b*tches)
Okay im sorry ill begin~
A/n all of this is completely unedited and if bad grammar annoys you srry not srry
Lets talk about what fuckboy!jungkook is oki
I feel like in reality there are just a bunch of rumors about him but hes so smol and hes the quiet type so he doesnt have the energy to dismiss them
Like im sorry soft jungkook is way to good in my mind rn okay #cuddles4days im not in the mood for him to strangle me with his amazing biceps
Anyway
you never rlly met him in the 4 years of going to the same highschool as him (since you’re in those smart people classes like humanities) until senior year
You and him had the same AP Lit. class lmao english class is  l i t
Which surprised you bc of the rumors like i thought he was a badboy ?? arent those normally idiots ??
Nah my bby is a smart nugget, he just likes to look hella bf 25/8
First day of school cliche where you show up late to class and have to sit next to him because i  d i e  for those plots okay
But you dont know thats him because you’ve never seen him, so you’re confused on why most of the girls keep glaring at you
But soon enough you catch on and you’re like fml
And then the professor is like “where you are sitting is your assigned seating for the rest of the year” and you’re like f m L
He ends up introducing himself to you because i mean like table buddies
But hes really nervous because hes a cute little bean and you’re hella cute cuz lets be honest ur probably wearing like basic black leggings and a hoodie with your hood over your head to hide the bed hair you didnt feel like brushing that morning
Oh, just me? Okay…
He likes ur name because it rolls off the tongue and he thinks it suits you even tho he doesnt know you
Yet ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
You dont really think hes a fuckboy because he seems so nice and he has the cutest lil bunny smile sEE
That is until after school u end up getting to ur locker late because u left something in one of your classes
And u see him pinning a girl against the lockers down the hall
And ur like well shit nvm
And u quickly get ur shit and go because das  a w k w a r d
But then he sees u run off and hes like awh crap i dun fucked up
A few weeks go by and u notice he barely really comes to class so u usually sit alone
On days he does come his chair seems extra close to yours and he’s basically smothering you
But u dont mind because he smells nice
And on the days he does come you get kinda excited because
1) you get a partner who doesnt expect you to do all of the work
2) this boy cute when he gets all intelligent
Ur  like “yes pls continue speaking about the essay we are writing that i have no idea is on because i kept getting lost in the sound of ur voice”
He notices when u zone out because you start staring at his lips when hes talking and he thinks its the cutest thing
One day u get assigned a week long project and ur close enough friends with jungkook to basically scold and force him to come to class all week
But only if he can force u to come to his house to work on it after school
Which you’re low key nervous of because ur going to a ‘fuckboy’s house’ by yourself
And u dont wanna do the dirty because ur a pure child haha not for long
But you agree anyway
And honestly even after the project is done (which you got an A on) you continue going over to his house because his bed is comfortable and he always has snacks
And his mom loves you
Like legit on days you dont go the next day you do she’s like “wheRE WERE YOU”
When the semester is over the professor lets you pick seats but you both enjoy each other’s company so you stay seated together.
finally ur at his house one day and ur just laying on his bed scrolling thru insta and he’s sitting on his bean bag in the corner on his phone and u look up at him and realise
Shit
You like him
Like a lot
And u mentally face palm because this was not supposed to happen
But it happened and you’re too far down the hole to climb out
Sometimes u end up napping at his house after school because his bed is more comfortable than yours and one friday night u wake up in his arms
And its like the best feeling ever
Its so warm and hes so cuddly hes like latched onto you
You stay under the warm blankets before you question when he even got in bed since he was playing video games before you fell asleep
And then his phone lights up and ofc you check it for him bc ur a nosey bitch
But not before you observed how adorable he was while he was sleeping
Nope not creepy at all
its his friend tae texting him (you didn’t really know his friends since you had different friend groups)
You check it and its smth like “stop staring at y/n while shes sleeping and reply u creep”
And you’re like w a t
So you scroll up and see that while u were sleeping jungkook went on a full rant on how cute u are and how whipped he is
And ur like holy fadoodles dis boy likes me
And so u decided to text tae like “this is y/n, does he actually like me”
Which turns into you both having a convo on how thirsty jungkook is until he wakes up
Hes like wtf r u doing and he snatches the phone and reads through your messages with tae while u like sit up to stare at him
And he’s still half asleep so it takes him to realise whats going on
“Omfg y/n i can explain-”
He starts rambling about how long he had been crushing on u and that he didn’t want to tell you because you seemed uninterested so he kept it a secret and never told anyone
And honestly he was freaking out because the onE tiMe he tells anyone that he likes you, you find out
But while he’s rambling you’re coming up with an excuse to text your mom that you’re spending the night at his house, so you just say he’s not feeling well and his parents are gone for the weekend.
Lmao she doesnt care she’s just like “lmao ik ur lying but have fun dont get pregnant”
Or Maybe thats just my mom idk
You have to shut him up by snatching his phone out of his hands and kissing him
When you pull away you’re just like “you talk too much lmao”
You explain to him that you like him too and u just get under the covers again and snuggle up next to him, and he wraps his arms around you
And you stay like that for a while before hes like “its late you should get home”
And you tell him you’re staying the night whether he likes it or not
And he is so down for that
But then you end up just spending the weekend there because why not his parents love you
And every night is just filled with cuddling, watching netflix, making out, late night snacks, etc.
Saturday night he gets a lil touchy and soon enough ur like straddling him and grinding your hips against his
But then he’s like “Ive never done this before” and you c o m b u s t
Ur like aren’t you like the school fuckboy how have you not done this
And he tells you its all just rumors and hes too lazy to set the record straight
And you basically decide to take things slow that night since it was you’re first time too and honestly it was so cute
It wasn’t really steamy rough sex it was more soft fluffy love making that is filled with giggling and exploring and appreciating each other
That was definitely the night you fell in love with him
Which is big because you thought love was gross
The next day you’re cuddling and he’s like “you know ur my gf now”
And ur like duh
You start going on cute dates after that like going to cafes or amusement parks
He loved taking you to the beach during the summer because u looked gr8 in a bikini
You found out you were going to the same college with was fantastic, so you decided to rent an apartment together nearby the campus instead of living in a dorm.
Which normally you’d be against because moving in together so quickly ?? but you felt different like this relationship was going to last
UNTIL HE CHEATED
Lmao jk gotcha bitch
My baby is too pure and innocent to cheat
Well innocent until you both get into bed and then oh lord it gets steamy
He wants to experiment with like e v e r y t h i n g and honestly you were down
But ofc you set some boundaries.
There were lines he couldn’t cross
I mean sometimes he tried but you shut that down real quick
Overall your relationship was perfect and you couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend
I mean he brought you pizza rolls and dr pepper to ‘study dates’ how could you not love him.
Oml it took me over an hour to write this its like 2:30 am why am i awake anyway imma go to bed now, idk ur name jungshookz but pls write more fanfics i need more to read late at night okay gnite
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