TRIGGER WARNING: MENTIONS OF RAPE
CAPTIVE PRINCE SPOILERS
You know what? This is.... Paces the room and slaps the wall with an open palm. No, this is definitely..... Punches a hole through the wall.
At this point, at this point, if I was Laurent, I would just let my uncle kill to be fucking honest. This is the height of things that have happened and I am losing my mind. It's not like I'm surprised, it's just the overwhelming audacity and endless betrayal.
I'm the one with unnatural feelings? ME?? YOU'RE the one who f*cking RAPED ME at the vulnerable age of THIRTEEN!!! I would lose my shit.
Not only has the Regent let this stupid believable rumour foster because everyone is well aware of how much Laurent worshipped his brother Auguste, but now he raises it as a countermeasure against Laurent ever revealing the truth. Like who the fuck are the people going to believe? Their bitchy prince or their seemingly benevolent leader with a heart of gold (he goes around fucking children!!! He's been bedding Nico since he was TEN!!! SCREAMS IN UNDILUTED RAGE!!)
I can't! I can't stand him. How?! Omg. Hoooow can people lie like they speak the truth? How can they do it without a shred of remorse? He took advantage of a young child at the time he needed him the most and he's flaunting that vulnerability, he's using it to his advantage because no one knows he likes children, because those who do know would never fathom that such a good man would do such a thing to his fucking nephew! He turned his nephew into a viper, he is the reason Laurent has no friends, no allies, betrayal and betrayal and yet another betrayal. And when the truth about Damen comes out everything is going to fall apart and I can't stand it. I can't stand any of this! I'm losing my mind. How? How has Laurent possibly put up with this for nearly ten years? I would have just given up and let the Regent take me, this is madness!!
20 notes
·
View notes
question: how do you find your research/sources? yours and dancing disasters' icemav fics are so inside baseball i love it, but how do you go about doing research?
I just read a lot & google stuff I don't know & am curious about. not that hard to start learning. and in terms of reading I've been interested in military history & milfiction my whole life. mostly related to the US army, actually--im extremely new to naval history and naval literature; all of that interest was driven by top gun. I've also been fortunate enough to visit a lot of the places I write about--ive been to Pearl Harbor a couple times & San Diego MANY times, for instance, and I've toured a few aircraft carriers and military bases. I've also finally bitten the bullet and kinda shifted my career path towards aerospace, so I've been learning a lot just by working in the aerospace & defense sector/spending a lot of time with people who do.
that's obviously not to say that I am somehow Educated in all this stuff. im pretty open on this blog about me being young & naive & wrong much of the time about how the real world works. so, you know, a lot of shit I just Make Up according to my preconceived notions of the military & the world.
here is my recommended military/navy reading list, some fiction and some nonfiction.
someone also asked recently if I had read anything good in the last 6 months--yes!! three new additions to my reading list: a) Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk by Ben Fountain. So goddamn good. If you have to read only one novel about the Iraq War, make it this one. It's more about America than it is about Iraq. b) Redeployment by Phil Klay. This one is a collection of short stories about Marines in Iraq, written by a USMC vet, talk about inside baseball. Crazy amounts of jargon in here, basically a "to-google" list. won the national book award which idk if it deserved, but it's good. c) No true glory: A Frontline Account of the Battle of Fallujah by Bing West. currently reading this one, really well done so far, talks a lot about how fucked the US strategy was in Iraq with Fallujah serving as a metonymy/case study for the war itself.
again... this is all mostly close-quarters-combat (infantry) literature, I really am not that interested in the navy/Air Force that much outside of top gun lol
though I did recently remember that in early 2022, before I was into top gun, I read "Wingmen" by Ensan Case, which is actually a gay US naval aviator romance set in WWII published in 1979! it's really authentic and kind of sad, obviously, since it was a 1940s navy gay love story published in 1979. I don't actually think Wingmen influenced how I wrote wwgattai or how I think of TG/TGM but I just remembered that I read that book in February 2022 and going "oh my god they were wingmen" so maybe you might find that book interesting.
29 notes
·
View notes
i think something that will forever linger in my brain about the newsies novel (which everyone should read! its so good and is available online !) is this part
there are So many other moments (him saying hes seen guys bigger than crutchie not make it out of the refuge, “you touch davey and ill-“ , jack basically saying going back to the refuge will kill him , jack sits around and talks about his day with all the boys, medda saying she sings to jack in his box , jacks family picture, jacks father canonically being a dilf ,the picture getting ripped up, etc etc) but that description . that being the way santa fe wouldve gone for him realistically . will Always ruin me.
70 notes
·
View notes
Hey, was Noé from Auvergne? Bc that's where Lestat is from. Mochizuki Jun, señora, I know you watched the IWTV film but did you read the books too? Are you watching the new TV series? Is Louis de Sade name an homage?!?! Just a min.
OK, so yes it's Auveroigne in Altus, which the vampire counterpart to the historical province. In the wiki, in Noé page says:
Averoigne is a fictional counterpart of a historical province in France, detailed in a series of short stories by the American writer Clark Ashton Smith.[1] The province is considered "the most witch-ridden in the entire country. The location is frequently used in Smith's stories as well as his close friends'.
One of the main themes tackled in the stories of Averoigne is vampires. The forests of Averoigne are said to be infested with vampires as well as werewolves.
Which means that Mochijun, who has done her research very well for Case Study of Vanitas, would likely have come across this (which seems to be the kind of stories that also got Anne Rice to choose Auvergne for Lestat???) but given that Mochijun has also said (the translation of that interview is somewhere in my vnc tag) that she watched IWTV and all the multiple references to other vampires and Gothic stories and fairy tales scattered in Vanitas I wouldn't put it pass her to put Auveroigne as a wink.
Also here you have the Wikipedia for Averoigne.
I am obssesed by this btw. The stories and worldbuilding couldn't be more different but Vanitas does occur in France, mainly Paris and has vampires so the association was a bit unavoidable in my mind.
If you have read/watched both case study of vanitas and interview with the vampire I want some crazy talk here.
24 notes
·
View notes
Every time I read a book by Fredrik Backman, I'm left speechless.
!!!LONG RANT BELOW!!! + my reviews of the books I've read by him
It all started one year when the book "A Man Called Ove" was chosen to be read in my bookclub. The teacher was talking about how he has a different style of writing and I'm like oh alright bet let's try it out.
GOD. That book was a solid 10/10. It touched dark topics like death and suicide while also having a good humor. The chapter with the cat being almost frozen to death had me giggling a little too much 😂 I loved seeing it on screen when the movie came out.
So many good quotes were in this book. Especially between Sonja and Ove.
“You only need one ray of light to chase all the shadows away,”
“But if anyone had asked, he would have told them that he never lived before he met her. And not after either.”
“Of all the imaginable things he most misses about her, the thing he really wishes he could do again is hold her hand in his.”
This book was just so amazing. I have nothing bad to say against it and strongly recommend it to be the first book one should read by Fredrik. It shows the dark themes he touches while having humor, how good the flashbacks are shown. How they leave you with more questions until you're gut-punched.
Alright. Second book I've read was Beartown. I got it as a birthday gift along with Anxious People (I'll talk abt that later).
I knew Beartown revolved around the topic of rape. But god, it was still a hard read. Watching a small town get torn apart over the drama, how nobody really believed Maya and she was even bullied for lying. It broke my heart, leaving me in tears.
The worst part? How real this felt. How it's probably happened to countless girls and guys before. Being raped but not believed, then being bullied and harassed.
The quotes hit hard in this too.
"It's not always obvious, because the people around a bullied child assume that he or she must get used to it after awhile. Never. You never get used to it. It burns like fire the whole time. It's just that no one knows how long the fuse is, not even you."
“Everyone has a thousand wishes before a tragedy, but just one afterward.”
“What you create, others can destroy. Create anyway. Because in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and anyone else anyway.”
I don't have too much to say on this book as it was an extremely hard read and took me about a month to finish. But it was still a great story. I don't know if I'll finish the other two books anytime soon. I think what makes it hard is that there's no "happy ending." The rape can't be undone. The damage can't be undone. Maya will forever be scared of the dark. How Kevin has status, keeping him safe. Yes, he is scared of the dark now, but it's not enough. Nothing will fix what happened.
And what I just finished reading today, Anxious People
"It's a story about a bank robbery gone wrong? How can that make me cry?" -Me to my teacher.
God. What a book. This book made me laugh and almost brought me to tears. If I wasn't in school while reading this, I would be ugly crying.
This book perfectly embodies Fredrik's writing style. How EVERY little piece matters. Every character is important. You're reading and then hit with a plot twist. Knut being dead? Never expected. That one COMPLETELY threw me in for a loop. The way the chapter hopped back to the flashbacks and then to the interview, oh my god I loved this so much. Might be my favorite one yet.
Every character was so diverse with their own story and struggles, yet they all came together and helped each other when they needed it. I loved the fact that there wasn't a villain in this story- the bank robber wanted to harm nobody, just take care of her kids.
So many of these quotes hit home. The funny ones, the serious ones.
“Not knowing is a good place to start.” I always tell my therapist "I don't know." She said I'm the only person she allows to say that. The fact that a psychologist said that??? It just comforted me so much.
"...but inside she was standing in a forest screaming until her heart burst. The trees grew until one day the sunlight could no longer break through the foliage, and the darkness in there became impenetrable." This one also hit home for me. I'm a very angry person but try my best to control it. Multiple times a day, I imagine myself running into a forest, screaming and yelling my heart out, nobody hearing me. I felt so understood, so seen in this.
"Can you imagine what a bad parent you must have been for your children not to want to be parents?"
Woah. I had to close the book and think about this. I don't have the best relationship with my parents, but they are okay parents. They might not rob a bank for me though 😂. But this quote just... I don't know. It really puts a different view on things. It almost makes me feel a bit bad. All in all, this is a quote that lives in the back of my head rent free.
Ever since the first page of this book, I knew I was in for a ride. It felt so long ago, reading chapter 2, "don't think about cookies". This book is a solid 100/10, I will never get rid of it and will reread it many times to come.
Please. If you're looking for a good book to read, please just do ANYTHING by Fredrik Backman. His writing style is unique, fun, just so different and a breath of fresh air. His books will make you cry and laugh and you'll find quotes that you carry on with you for years to come. As I write, I find myself often writing in his sort of style. He is truly an amazing writer and comes up with amazing plots. Before reading his works, only one book ever made me cry. (A Mango Shaped Space). But no movie has ever made me cry. I sobbed in the theaters watching A Man Called Otto. Can't wait to watch Anxious People on Netflix now! I've heard bad stuff, but I'll still watch it.
I hope I managed to convince someone to read a book by Fredrik Backman. Or possibly even re-read a book. I know I want to keep reading books by him. Maybe My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry?
4 notes
·
View notes