As a reminder that good exists out there, a coworker recently confessed to me that he found out his child is questioning their identity (kid's gender redacted for this post). The kid is keeping it from him, so he can't say anything to them or show that he knows, but he's doing his best to get mentally prepared and educated so that he'll be ready whenever his kid does feel comfortable enough come to him.

For context, this guy is a big, bulky middle aged dude who loves sports and typical outdoor "manly" activities. As his coworker and friend, I know he's a kind and sweet teddy bear of a person, but his kid probably views him as a stern, authoritarian figure, the way most teenagers view their parents. His family lives in a conservative area, so I'm sure between that, their dad's looks and interests, and the fact that their dad is a Figure of Authority, the kid is worried that they won't be accepted.

But you know what? When he found out about his kid, the first thing he did was reach out to his closest queer friend and ask for resources for parents of questioning children. His biggest fears are that his kid will be bullied or discriminated against and won't feel comfortable enough to be themself. His second action was to find himself a mentor in another parent who went the same situation (kid coming out in a conservative town). The other person is preparing him for some of the struggles his kid may face and the fights he may need to take on as a parent to make sure his kid is safe and treated well.

Something I want to emphasize for people focused on language as the primary method of allyship is that when we spoke, he used some outdated terms and thoughts about gender and sexuality. That does not make him bad. These were the terms and thinking used about questioning teenagers when he was growing up and he never needed to learn more current ones. But now that he does have that need, he's throwing himself in head first because that's his kid and he's darn well going to make sure that his kid feels welcomed and has a safe place to be themselves even if they never come out to him.

My 4 year old just asked me to “put on the tv with Kirk, put on the yellow and blue spacemen” 🥹

From the next room, I just overheard my kids thanking each other for the Christmas gifts they independently got each other without my prodding, in their adorable broken deadpan teenage voices and like. This is SUCH a cliché but my kids are loving and thankful humans and that is the best gift ever.

My kid loves cowboys and we've seen all of Outer Range and now I'm making him sit through Red Wing bc Glen Powell in a cowboy hat.

Dastardly Daughter woke me up, ecstatic, at 530am to tell me that Cavetown dropped an album overnight. And she was sorry because it's early and she knows that I'm still getting over COVID and I'm really tired but it was so exciting she wanted to tell me and would I listen to a song before she goes to school. It was so cute and sweet.

So I'm currently winning at parenthood right now. On many many levels. Later today I expect to end up listening to the whole thing.

Sometimes it feels like my kid doesn't listen to a word I say but the other day she was pretending to make a youtube video (encouraging her stuffies to like and subscribe, etc), & I reminded her that "Fame isn't the most important thing to try to get."

To which she replied, "I know. Power is."

So yeah, it's nice to know she's definitely absorbing the basics from me.

My poor family has endured my love of Jesus Christ Superstar for years and years along with my occasional rants about people who don’t know Ian Gillan did the album before Ted Neeley did the show or the movie or my musings that Axl Rose is one of the only modern vocalists who could do the screams right but probably not the rest and I love them for their endurance BUT they got a peek into my true hyper-fixation recently when I FINALLY got to see it live and it was so good that I begged my oldest to come with me and see it again, and because he knows nothing about the show, during the entire drive to the city I played snippets of the show but not the parts that are best experienced live for the first time because that’s robbery and in between songs I explained the premise and the story line and the controversies and made him listen to the lyrics on the songs that are hard to understand live to be sure he got them and then we discussed theology and how could the BBC ban this when the Dean of St Paul’s contributed to the liner notes and THEN I just let him experience it live and he said it was a good call to give him the background briefing and thought it was amazing and that’s how I know I’m a good parent.

Flipping through the channels and my son asked if we could watch Captain America: Civil War.

I've raised him right, lovelies. ❤️😂❤️

My son finished Tears of the Kingdom on Saturday, after I had gone to bed

When I got home from work on Sunday he asked if he could show me the last bit/ending. My daughter came down to watch too. All of us stayed up past midnight watching and chatting about the story and all the side quests left to do.

It was so wonderful and wholesome. My kids are teenagers and I treasure these moments when they want to connect and share with me.

I’m so obsessed with my son’s hair. He still lets me brush it every day, but I’m guessing those days are numbered…

Tips to raise an easily distracted child

As a parent, it can be frustrating when your child is easily distracted. It can make it challenging for them to concentrate on tasks, complete homework, or even have a conversation. However, it's important to remember that children have different personalities and learning styles, and some may require more support than others to stay focused. Here are some tips for raising an easily distracted child:

Set Clear Expectations:- Children need clear expectations to understand what is expected of them. Be specific and clear about what you want your child to do, and communicate the consequences if they do not follow through. For example, if you want your child to complete their homework before playing video games, make sure they understand this expectation and the consequences if they do not follow through.

Create a Structured Routine:- Children thrive on structure and routine, and having a consistent schedule can help them stay focused. Create a daily routine that includes specific times for waking up, eating, homework, playtime, and bedtime. Stick to this routine as much as possible, as it can help your child stay on task and avoid distractions.

Minimize Distractions:- Create a quiet and organized space for your child to study and complete their homework. Remove distractions such as television, video games, or toys. If your child needs to use a computer or tablet for homework, consider using an app or software that blocks distracting websites or apps.

Break Tasks into Smaller Chunks:- Large tasks can be overwhelming for children, especially if they are easily distracted. Break tasks into smaller, manageable chunks, and provide positive feedback as your child completes each task. This can help them stay motivated and avoid getting distracted.

Use Positive Reinforcement:- Praise your child for staying on task and completing their work. Offer incentives for staying focused, such as extra playtime or a special treat. Positive reinforcement can help your child stay motivated and on track.

Be Patient:- Raising an easily distracted child can be challenging, but it's important to be patient and understanding. Remember that your child's attention span may be shorter than others, and they may require more support to stay focused. With patience and consistency, you can help your child develop good study habits and focus skills.

In conclusion, raising an easily distracted child requires patience, consistency, and structure. By setting clear expectations, creating a structured routine, minimizing distractions, breaking tasks into smaller chunks, using positive reinforcement, and being patient, you can help your child develop good study habits and focus skills. Remember that every child is unique, and it may take some trial and error to find the strategies that work best for your child.

Triplets Ka Transport Company? | Zero Screen Time | Triplets Vlog - 17th Feb’24

Double Mommy Win

So Girl Child (nearly 4) has become quite enamoured with Princess Sofia, she doesn't actually watch the show but she does enjoy clips on Youtube.

She has taken to wearing a blue crinoline from one of her costumes as her "princess sofia dress" but she needed a magic necklace. We went out and ran errands today but ran out of time to do a quick stop to look for a necklace for her prior to rest time.

Luckily, rest time happened easier with promise of magic necklace after. Then husband went out and couldn't find a single one. So over phone call we were able to come up with a rhinestone sticker, a necklace cord, and a bit of cardboard and Kiddo has her necklace.

Once it's put on though, she is immediately asking for a princess to come out. Which, of course, won't happen. So I hop onto my laptop SURE there must be an app or game or video of a princess talking to someone in a generic way. Elmo has one, PinkFong and Baby Shark has one.... not D*sney.

I was starting to stress as she was looking over my shoulder, when I remembered I followed a TikTok'er who used to be a Party Princess. Found a video of Cinderella having a snack with the viewer, and happy child was happy.

Win all around!

I'll try to remember this the next time she's melting down because her banana broke.