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thisisnotthenerd · 6 months

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and we're back with another edition of thisisnotthenerd's d20 stats. this time we're talking character races. mechanically. they are not all italian.

most common character races

a couple of things:

the chart displays the character races as they present within their individual seasons. this is not always reflective of their mechanical races, which is what i'm using to evaluate. if you go into the spreadsheet and look at the notes, you'll see the mechanical race for each character.

some characters are not counted because they do not have an accurate equivalent, e.g. the creepy co-eds and the prefrontal p.i.s. the magical misfits are because i don't know that you can get more variant human than what they have going on.

obviously there are repeats in the chart. those are not counted in the totals.

at the top, as most would expect from d20, is variant human, with 40 characters. this tracks for several reasons; it's a fairly solid race that allows you to start with a feat and tool proficiencies and focuses asis rather than spreading them around. the other reason is that it's used as the base for most characters in most seasons that don't fit the dnd standard races, i.e. tiny heist, a crown of candy, mice & murder, and the ravening war.

next up is actually harengon with 6, though it might not look like it from the chart. that's because all of the stoats from burrow's end are using harengon stats with the addition of at will primal savagery and claw/bite attacks. it's a solid build that fits well for this season, but makes the rabbit comments from the top of the season funnier.

next up is half-elves, with 4 characters: fabian seacaster, danielle barkstock, misty moore, and agnes. mechanically, those marked as faeries are half-elves. they are marked as faerie to distinguish them from fairies, who are also on this list a little later on.

in fourth place is tieflings, with 3 characters: fig faeth, magfelda/maggie, and gertrude. two fo them sit in the same seat in back to back seasons. tied with them are half-orcs: gorgug thistlespring, katja cleaver, and sokhbarr, who is another reskin, much like the faerie characters.

tied for fifth with two each are: bugbear (marcid the typhoon & k.p. hob), drow (lilith (as a reskin) & andhera), changeling (rick diggins & binx choppley), high elf (adaine abernant & efink murderdeath), kalashtar (pete conlan & riva), kenku (chirp & squak), ratfolk [different types] (kugrash & jack brakkow), vampire (squing & may wong), and warforged (car-go jones & pinocchio)

and with one each we have:

aarakocra: sunny biscotto

aasimar: barbarella sarsaparilla gainglynn

android [ryn]: sundry sidney

cerebroslug: skip/valdrinor

clone soldier [shistavanen]: big barry syx

dwarf: ostentatia wallace

fairy: twyla

genasi [water]: sam nightingale

gnome [forest]: cheese

goblin: riz gukgak

halfling [lightfoot]: penny luckstone

hobgoblin [frog-man reskin]: gerard of greenleigh

hollow one: leiland

merfolk: myrtle the bitch

orc: princess foehammer

owlbear: delloso de la rue

satyr: zelda donovan

shifter [beasthide]: ylfa snorgelsson

tabaxi: puss in boots/pib

triton: troyánn

there were a total of 34 pc races used over the course of dimension 20.

now for the fun part, beyond the numbers:

commentary

a lot of this won't make sense without the notes. if you're interested in reading through this, i'd suggest at least a cursory look.

most of the pc races used on dimension 20 do actually have a standardized background (or two or more) in dnd. generally they stick to the same variants most of the time, usually the ones that grant the best versions of racial abilities. even the reskins have a solid background: kashai->half-orc, faerie->half-elf, the usage of kalashtar stats for pete, frogman->hobgoblin, cat->tabaxi, puppet->warforged, rick diggins as a changeling clicko man. they make sense and make sure that characters have a balance of racial traits.

however there are a few that don't have a standard. some of them only show up in the bestiaries. some are straight up homebrewed or borrowed from 'unofficial' sources. i pieced them together based on wiki info and what i could find on each of these.

drider: from what i found, drider isn't currently playable. i suspect they combined drider traits from the bestiaries and drow/dark elf stats to make lilith. it gives her a bunch of really cool abilities.

ratfolk: this one was tough, because murph and matt used different sources to make their rat-men. murph's likely comes from kobold press, wherein ratfolk are small, with 25 ft of movement, rodent empathy, darkvision, and poison resistance. hell, kug might still be a reflavored dwarf. i don't think so, because he doesn't use any of the racial abilities that would make him a dwarf as opposed to ratfolk, but who knows. matt's comes from adamant entertainment's ratkin, whose ratfolk are medium, humanoid rats, with 30 ft of movement, low light vision, immunity to disease, and proficiency with bite attacks. matt specifically references ratkin during pirates of leviathan, so i'm fairly confident that that's what jack is.

cyborg: gunnie is a base human, but has a lot of cybernetic replacements and so has a few extras that come with it. he gets an additional +1 to any skill, at the expense of augmentation side effects i.e. vulnerability to ion damage. this is a combination of sw 5e's cybernetic augmentation rules with the sw 5e human.

cerebroslug: norman is a base human in sw 5e. that part is easy. i'm pretty sure that cerebroslugs were a homebrew creation based on existing starstruck lore and zac's character pitch. i had to go back and watch a few episodes of starstruck to figure out what he's using, because it sure as hell is not on the wiki. body thief is the one named ability that i can recall. if a creature is incapacitated, the cerebroslug can enter its body start running it. if not incapacitated, the cerebroslug cannot attempt to overpower their vessel. other racial traits allow the cerebroslug to a) retain it's own mental statistics while using the vessel's physical statistics, b) run the body by using piloting statistics, e.g. making piloting checks to run the body upon waking. with enough successes, they stop being required. cerebroslugs are sensitive to cold--they are ejected from their vessel if 20 points of cold damage are dealt to them. they must succeed on a dc 15 con saving throw or be paralyzed upon ejection. i really hope this is actually written down somewhere and isn't just me hallucinating after hours of rewatching starstruck.

owlbear: this was simpler: rue is an awakened owlbear as opposed to a standard owlbear. the adaptations: innate savagery. ancestric physiology, natural instincts, and clumsy are the noted racial traits.

stoat: they're actually harengons as noted previously. they also have the cantrip primal savagery that they can cast at will in order to up the damage of their claw/bite attacks. these stoats are literally built different.

and that's all! let me know if there's something i missed; i'd love to hear it. the spreadsheet is open to perusal.

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 meta #thisisnotthenerd's d20 stats #dimension 20 statistics

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valiantstarlights · 1 year

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The Endless siblings' (and Hob's) DND characters

Disclaimer: I only used stuff from the PHB (5E) to make things easier for everyone, including myself.

Destiny

Race: Half-Orc

Class: Monk (Way of the Open Hand)

Background: Acolyte

Wanted to be a monk so he can reason that his entire body is a weapon and therefore can't be allowed in fancy gatherings.

Wants to have a low INT character because he's tired of knowing everything IRL.

Likes stealing things and gets away with it thanks to his high DEX score.

Carries Death and Delirium's characters on his shoulders when the party has to flee. (Destruction can fend for himself.)

Death

Race: Rock Gnome

Class: Cleric (Life Domain)

Background: Sailor

Nobody dies on her watch. Don't fight her on this. She will win.

Helps everyone, even villains.

Loves shopping episodes.

Dream and Hob's characters' #1 shipper.

Dream

Race: High Elf (or Drow--check with the DM first)

Class: Bard (College of Lore)

Background: Noble

His character is literally the antithesis of what a bard is usually portrayed as.

Wears only black, grey, or white clothes and loves to play melancholic music. Flirting? He doesn't know her. (Desire once called him a College of Eral bard because he took the fun out of funeral.)

Wanted to have a sad ending for his character in the beginning but changed his mind after Hob made him feel so loved that he chose to live happily with him instead. (in-game and in real life.)

The looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll. Donates 10% of his earnings to schools and orphanages and thus is well-loved by good NPCs of the realm.

Destruction

Race: Mountain Dwarf

Class: Barbarian (Path of the Berserker)

Background: Outlander

Tries his best not to be a murderhobo.

Sings Misty Mountains every short/long rest. He's actually more of a traditional bard than Dream is, and he's also proficient in a musical instrument thanks to his background.

Likes drawing (stick figure) fanart of the party.

Describes his character as having the most magnificent beard.

Desire

Race: Tiefling

Class: Sorcerer (Draconic Bloodline)

Background: Charlatan

Tried to seduce Hob's character once and it almost resulted in a PVP with Dream.

Calls the big bad 'mommy/daddy.'

Successfully fucked a genasi who was the big bad's right hand and in doing so saves the day.

They ended up married to him and they have adorable little tiefling-genasi children together.

Despair

Race: Green Dragonborn

Class: Paladin (Oath of Vengeance)

Background: Urchin

Amazing at roleplaying.

Likes having the tallest character.

The party's leader via unanimous decision.

Likes to haggle during shopping episodes.

(Note: The twins' characters are siblings. They have literally planned their characters to both have wings that matched the other's race.

Desire's tiefling will have dragon wings at level 14. Despair's dragonborn will have wings at level 20 and she's gonna describe them as bat-like and demonic in appearance.)

Delirium

Race: Lightfoot Halfling

Class: Druid (Circle of the Moon)

Background: Hermit

Just wants to turn into all the animals and talk to plants!

Druidcrafts flower crowns every day for everyone (Dream and Hob get matching ones)

Likes to be the party's weather forecaster.

Hoards all the dice.

Hob

Race: Half-Elf

Class: Rogue (Assassin)

Background: Soldier

Here to romance Dream's character. That's pretty much it.

Will do anything for Dream, including giving him all his gold. Literally the simpiest simp to ever walk the earth.

During character creation, when Dream says he's gonna be an elf, Hob immediately called dibs on being a half-elf. (They gotta be anatomically compatible, okay? For reasons.)

The sunshine of the party along with Delirium. That is, until Dream gets hurt. And then no one is safe from his wrath. He's the looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually kill you. Do not fuck with him (or Dream). He has the power of god and anime on his side.

#dreamling DND AU #literally the first post I ever reblogged is about dnd and this AU started in the tags of that post #this is a no humans campaign #8 party members lord have mercy on the DM #I could never #dungeons and dragons #the sandman #dreamling #my writing #I haven't watched the DND movie yet. should I? 🤔#I mean I want to but I'm hesitating because I feel leery about what the company from seattle has done and is doing

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sadnesslaughs · 5 months

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Space orcs? No, no, the Trappist system guys are space orcs, they’re fucking terrifying. Humans are, like, space goblins at best.

“A FUCKING GOBLIN? That is what the galaxy thinks of me?” Drake pointed at his wanted poster, his index finger poking the ‘space goblin’ nickname the UNF military had given him. The nickname was all wrong. A man with his modest bounty was at least a space hob goblin at worst. A goblin, though, that was insulting, even by his low standards.

“I don’t know. I can kind of see it. Small, rough around the edges, always angry and mouthy. A space goblin suits you.” Sting touch Maxa laughed, his arms crossing over his chest, with his tentacles soon following, crossing over his arms. The six-foot five grey alien finding this extremely funny.

“Knock it off, Maxa, he’s clearly hurt by it. It’s normal for people to get bad nicknames on their first bounties. On my first bounty, they called me the Blackhole of Venus. Since all my targets vanished.” Hakz the Blackhole of Valia, said. The seven foot blue alien, smiling at her friend, trying to lift his spirit.

“What was wrong with that nickname?” Drake muttered, wishing he was the Blackhole of something.

“I’m not from Venus, I’m from Valia. How bad is that?”

“Yeah, awful. I feel horrible for you. How do aliens even know about goblins? Why did we teach you about them? Couldn’t we have taught you about dinosaurs or something? I could have been the T-Rex of Earth.”

“Or the chicken of Earth?” Maxa offered.

“A CHICKEN IS NOT A DINOSAUR.” Drake argued, giving Maxa an annoyed shove.

“Aren’t they related?” Maxa laughed, the nudge not moving him at all. “Blame your kind. They introduced their culture, that includes goblins.”

“But I’m not a goblin. I don’t steal mone….. I mean, I don’t hit people with….Ah, shit.” Drake was struggling to think of things he didn’t share in common with goblins. Apart from the obvious green skin. “I don’t bite people.”

“Um.” Hakz didn’t want to bring it up, but felt it needed to be mentioned. “Didn’t you bite commander Harthorn last week?”

“Wait? You bit Harthorn?” Maxa crouched, holding his stomach as he laughed. “N-no wonder you’re the goblin, you must have pissed him off. We need to get you a muzzle.”

“Gra!” Drake let out an angry screech, which didn’t help the goblin comparison. “He was going to take me to a cell, so I bite his hand and ran for it. THAT DOES NOT MAKE ME A GOBLIN.”

“Can…Can…Can’t breathe.” Maxa wheezed, unable to stop laughing.

“I believe you.” Hakz nodded, an action that only made Drake feel worse. It was the same response a mother would give to a child that had told them a fantastical fictional story, which wasn’t the response he wanted right now.

“I’m not though.”

“Yes, I believe you.”

“Pl…please stop. I can’t… hurts so much.” Maxa was now on the floor, slamming his fist into the ground. The laughing stopped when Drake raised his leg, driving the tip of his boot into Maxa’s side.

“Why am I not considered intimidating? I scare people. I scared every damn merchant on that last ship.”

“That’s because you had a gun,” Maxa said, holding his side as he got to his feet. While he should have been mad about the kick, he was honestly happy to have stopped his laughing fit. The laughing hurting more than any human kick.

“No, it isn’t. I would be scary without a gun. I’m intimidating.” Drake puffed his chest out, hoping for confirmation. Silence only followed. Maxa looked to Hakz, who gestured him not to speak. “Guys?” Drake had never felt self-conscious about his size before. He was of average height among humans, but he wasn’t currently around humans. He was between a Drelian and a Brild. Two species known for their impressive builds.

“You carry yourself with confidence.” Hakz offered, not wanting to bring down their new bandit friend.

“What is his gun called confidence now? If so, you are carrying yourself with confidence, then.” Maxa grinned.

“This is unfair. We can’t all be big aliens. I worked hard for my bounty. I should get the respect I deserve.” It was hard being one of the new space races. You were already at a disadvantage and the title of space goblin wasn’t helping.

“You’re on a poster, you should be happy. Not many people get a physical poster nowadays, most only end up in a database. Your face is on every wall of this city. Isn’t that enough for you?” Maxa sighed, tired of the topic. He had his laugh. Now he wanted the human to get over himself.

“Next time, you will get a better nickname. I’m certain of it. Until then, you’re our space goblin.” She said, that earning a weird look from Drake. Drake not finding the term as endearing as she intended it to be.

“If you’re that upset, why don’t you go put in a complaint to the UNF? They have an office here.” Maxa joked.

“You know, maybe I will.” Drake took three steps before realizing the joke, returning to the bounty board in a snit. “Ha-ha. I need a drink. Come on, you two coming?”

“Of course. We can talk about our next job there.” Hakz started walking to the Dirty Shot, a seedy bar that preferred to keep its cliental private. Maxa and Drake followed, Maxa deciding to give one more comment before they sat down.

“Yeah, I would love to join our little space goblin for a drink.” Maxa saw Drake glare at him, stomping his way to a seat in a huff. Maxa sat across from him as the three went about their drinks and business.

#short stories #writing #writing prompt #writer #story #scifi

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cavegirlpoems · 1 year

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Another take on demihumans as social constructs

I had an idea knocking around inside my head, and then I saw that Dan had already done it over on Throne Of Salt, which rather undercut my brilliant originality. More time has passed, so I figured I'd have a crack at the idea myself.

So. Demihumans (elf, half-elf, hobbit, dwarf, orc, half-orc, goblin, hob-goblin, dragon). Rather than positing each as a seperate species - and then getting our skull-callipers out to compare them - we'll just look at the position each occupies in our setting socially, and extrapolite backwards from that. EG, let's suppose you're an elf because you do elf things and people treat you like an elf. But you're still recognisably an elf. What would that look like? How do you get that in society?

Suffice to say, this is all a thought experiment. I have no idea how this would play out in a proper setting or actual game.

Elves

"This person has autism, but their knowledge or power means we have to treat them respectfully."

An elf is quite possibly smarter than you, but (if you aren't also an elf) the ways they think don't make sense. They follow patterns and customs that most people don't, they prioritise things regular people don't, they just fucking know things sometimes. Sometimes unusually innocent, sometimes deeply worldly and old before their time.

Elves typically go into professions where knowledge is important, and people can't just reject you out of hand for being unearthly and weird. Mages, priests, artists, nuns, midwives. That air of oddness can be a perk; it lets people know they're dealing with an elf, and should be prepared to act accordingly.

You treat elves with respect. After all, they know things and they have sufficient power or clout that if you offend them, they can make you regret it.

Most have at least a smattering of magic, some handy utility powers and maybe something like a magic missile to smack people who don't show respect. They take to it naturally, and often don't get that others can't just learn magic with the same fluency and focus that they do. Isn't it easy?

It doesn't have to be autism, but that's the most common one, and also the one the author has and is familiar with.

Different types of elves correspond to areas of focus. Wood elves like the natural earthy things like birds and trees, high elves like some 'respectable' topic like history or heraldry, dark elves know about something vaguelly taboo like poisons or spiders.

The term 'half-elf' is basically the same as 'high functioning'. Not really used by elves among themselves, but regular people use it to describe elves that seem more normal and approachable.

Generally, elf-ness is broadly hereditable, about as hereditable as autistic traits in the real world. A changeling is just somebody who turns out to be an elf despite nobody expecting it based on their family.

Elf communities exist. Cloisters and hideaways. They get weird fast.

Dwarves

"From a commoner family that knows marvelous trade secrets."

Being a dwarf means you've inherited the family name (or been adopted or married into it). You're one of a particular clan, and your clan knows how to do something that they guard jealously.

Metalworking is a common one. Mining and underground construction techniques are another. Warfare with specific secret techniques is another. Maybe a mix. Whatever it is, your clan has a secret way of doing things that gives you an advantage. Dwarf-made armour is just better than everybody else's. Dwarves who go to war fight in ways that seem impossible to replicate without their lengthy training, and are shockingly effective.

Dwarves often have magic of their own. More secrets handed down the clan. They have their own little sects of the mainstream religions, and their own priests.

The techniques of the dwarves give them an edge over other people. They're just commoners, but they can negotiate with nobles and even royalty, because if the dwarves aren't paid to their satisfaction nobody else can do it as well. And, really, a noble who's jewellery isn't made by dwarves is an embarassment.

These secrets need to be kept, or the dwarves lose their wealth and power. Dwarves prefer to live away from outsiders, in innaccessable places like mountain villages or underground fortresses. They don't trust non-dwarves, who might try to steal their secrets. The exception is other dwarves, who have a vested interest in preserving dwarvish independence.

They know how to hold a grudge. When you're jumped-up commoners bargaining with nobility, you have to.

Hobbits

"These people have fucked off to live independently, and its too much effort to get them to come back."

Hobbits have opted out of mainstream society to go and do something else. Maybe they dig holes in hillsides and make a commune that lives in a rural idyl. Maybe they have a caravan and travel the world with like-minded hobbits, trading goods and stories. Maybe they flee from persecution and live in floating villages hidden in the marshes.

Basically, they're hippies. They rejected the rat race and went to live some more authentic, satisfying or reasonable life off in the middle of nowhere. Their communities are tight-knit, idealistic and egaletarian, mostly. When a hobbit community goes wrong, it goes really wrong really quickly, and then falls apart entirely.

Some people are first-generation hobbits, who - alongside a group of like-minded individuals - chose to live like this. Some were born into a hobbit community and decided to stay. Some found a hobbit community and got adopted into it.

They love their pipeweed, and they're good at hiding. Hobbits get on with dwarves a lot of the time, even if their relationships tend to be distant.

The author has dated a number of hobbits in her time.

When some horrible dark lord rises up, fueled by the fire and smoke of industry and averice, and starts building dreadful armies and dark satanic mills, hobbits tend to be among the first victims they go after. Them and other minorities. Hobbits don't tend to fight back in an organised way, they go to ground, move on, or form guerilla resistance movements.

They are probably living happier lives than you are. Why aren't you a hobbit, actually?

Orcs

"Soldiers without homes."

Being an orc means fighting as a way of living. No farms, towns, shrines, capitals. Just a military camp that moves as the campaign moves. War is all you know. Home isn't a real concept, or isn't anymore, you just live wherever the fighting is, or wherever you go the fighting follows.

Some orcs are mercenaries. Poverty or desperation or persecution pushes them to sign up with a mercenary band. A tent in a military camp is still a roof over your head, sort of. Sometimes the orc is fleeing something, or ambitious.

Maybe they don't intend to be an orc for long. Really, though, cashing out isn't likely to happen. You die young, or if you don't your so scarred - emotionally and physically - that regular society doesn't want you back.

Other orcs didn't have a home to begin with. An invasion took it from you, and now your home is occupied by somebody else. Or your home has been on the front-lines of a trench war for decades and completely fucking uninhabitable, and the conflict is all you know.

Orcs stick together. Their real loyalty is to their comrades. An employer has their loyalty only as much as they pay them, unless that employer is also an orc.

There's a code. They treat orcs on the other side of the conflict better than the rest of the enemy. If you capture an enemy orc, he's one of yours now. He switches sides. Maybe his whole band surrenders and joins you, and they're with you now. Their loyalty is to the orcs, not to whichever kings and emperors started this war to begin with.

Sometimes orcs end up in the armies of dark lords. This lasts as long as the dark lord keeps paying them and doesn't expect them to break the code. They don't care what fucked up stuff the dark lord is doing, spend long enough as a mercenary and you get numb to attrocities, so long as the money keeps coming.

Other orcs take a more direct approach, and support themselves through banditry and conquest.

There's a lot of overlap between orcs and goblins. There's surprising overlap between orcs and dwarves.

Goblins

"Sentient vermin."

Even worse than being an orc. Somebody in power wants you gone, and now you don't have rights anymore. Basically outlaws.

A goblin might be a heretic, a criminal, somebody whose land got stolen, a fugitive, or something like that. Or just born to goblin parents. You're not part of regular society, and regular society wants you fucking gone. There's overlap between goblins and orcs. People don't like to admit it, but there's overlap between goblins and hobbits.

There's absolutely no social safety net when you're a goblin. Individual people might be nice to you, but others won't be, and maybe there's a bounty on your head again. Best to hide from them, then.

Goblins get really, really good at hiding. They find places they can escape from the world, and they band together with other goblins. When society is your enemy, fuck 'em. Feed yourself through subtle theft, banditry, whatever it takes. Trust your fellow goblins to keep you safe. If regular folks look at you funny, kick their teeth in so they won't want to chase after you in a hurry, and go to ground. Fill your home with cunning traps. Fuck 'em, look out for your own.

The world wants you dead, but you're clawing and spitting and snarling and still alive.

Hobgoblins are when these outlawsarm themselves and actively fight back. Guerillas, terrorists, militias, what have you. They cobble together uniforms, and stick the heads of those who'd oppress or exterminate them on spikes before fading back into the shadows. They're probably also orcs. Kobolds are when these outlaws are also dwarves, and have secret knowledge that mean you have to take them seriously, even while trying hard to get rid of them. Kobolds tend to be very good at building impregnable fortresses full of traps.

Dragons

"Personally strong enough to do whatever the fuck they want with no consequences."

The rule of thumb is this: if you can walk into an average town by yourself and demand they give you tribute, and get it without any noteworthy resistance, you're a dragon.

You probably weren't a building-sized fire-breathing carnivorous flying lizard to begin with. But once you hit a certain level of power, you realise nothing's stopping you from turning into one if you want to, and there never was.

Dragons shapeshift. They look like people, until they don't. Every one is a legend. Every one is unique.

Kings aren't dragons. Their power comes from systems of laws and heirarchy and custom meaning people choose to follow them. Wizards might be, as might particularly mighty warriors. Subtlety and subterfuge aren't particularly inclined towards making you a dragon, normally, but often somebody who excels in those areas will - when their back is to the wall - reveal that they were a dragon all along.

If you can personally reduce anybody who speaks back to you to two whisps of smoke coming from a pair of shoes (or a red smear), you're a dragon.

Some dragons do their best not to act like dragons. They try to be benevolent, to blend in with society, to only flex their power in emergencies. The rest - the majority, even - are problems.

A typical dragon ensures those who follow them are loyal by making dramatic examples. They tend to enjoy skull fortresses, big piles of treasure, and appending titles like 'the terrible' onto their name.

People who set out to slay dragons generally fail. Those who succeed normally become dragons themselves.

Elves become dragons disproportionately often. It's the focus that does it. They're often the most reasonable dragons.

Orcs do too. We call them black dragons, and they burn bright and furious, leading a horde of orcs behind them until they inevitably perish doing something exciting.

Goblins also produce a lot of dragons, particularly kobolds. A goblin who becomes a dragon is really good news (for the goblins and hobgoblins and kobolds and orcs of the world) and really bad news (for the sort of people who decided you were a goblin in the first place). These get called red dragons, because of all the blood that they leave behind.

Red dragons tend not to be inclined to be merciful to their enemies. Their followers, on the other hand, often do pretty well for themselves. When you have a red dragon on your side, you might not have to be a goblin for long.

Very successful kingdoms have been founded by a red dragon with a big dream.

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shadowmaat · 1 year

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Cozy Fantasy

Travis Baldree introduced me to a subgenre I never knew I needed: cozy fantasy. Low-stakes stories set in mild locations that end more or less happily.

Legends & Lattes is Travis's book. I first heard about it on twitter and between the premise and the cover art I preordered it, read it when it was out, and fell in love. It's about an orc barbarian lady named Viv who retires from adventuring to open a coffee shop and the misadventures (and love) that ensue as she tries to find her way in a new and unknown market. Helping her out are Tandri, a succubus who excels as manager (and stealing Viv's heart); Thimble, a ratkin culinary genius; and Cal, a faux-grouchy hob who works wonders with wood. The stakes are low, but the fun is not. A++ highly recommend AND there's a second book coming out that's a prequel to this one and features a foul-mouthed ratkin.

House Witch by Delemhach is about a young man whose magic centers on hearth & home. He sets himself up in the royal kitchen expecting to keep a low profile, but soon finds himself in far over his head, saving lives, and cooking the most incredible meals anyone's ever eaten. It's broken into three books, but each picks up right where the last left off, so it could have worked as one. The characters are well done, the drama builds at a steady pace, and while a lot of serious stuff happens it never really loses its sense of fun. There are a couple of places where the author gets overly-enamored of puns and getting a little too silly, but it's still a good story.

Coffee, Milk, and Spider Silk by Coyote JM Edwards is a short story and TBH it kinda suffers from that. The premise features a drider retiring from guard service to open a coffee shop. I've seen some unfavorable comparisons to L&L but while the author acknowledges it as an influence, it's still its own thing. I just wish there'd been more time to expand on the characters. The emo teen dryad with accident-caused disabilities is a whole story on her own, and I would have liked to know more about the single mom minotaur who hides her anxiety behind a wall of cheerfulness. Even the protagonist Gwen feels a little hastily sketched. It's still a fun, easy read, but I feel like it needs more. More stories set here or a future expansion to a full-length novel.

The Tea Princess Chronicles by Casey Blair are good. Some heavy plotting, but still light enough to qualify. They center on a princess who chooses to run away from her family rather than get shoved into a convenient box of their choosing. She comes to rest in a tea shop and settles in to study to become a tea master. Lots of drama interferes, of course, and there are smugglers to catch, a lost people to rescue, and a kingdom to save. There are secondary trans characters and secondary queer romances as well.

The Bookshop & the Barbarian by Morgan Stang was not written for me. I only got a few pages in before giving up in frustration, though I may try again later. The premise should be fun: woman on the run sets up shop in a cozy little bookstore and then hires a barbarian woman to help drive out the encroaching goblins. It's low stakes, funny, and has a sapphic romance, but for me it was trying way too hard to sound clever. I prefer straightforward storytelling to meandering narratives that include snide commentaries on everything. That's a me thing, though, and might suit other readers better.

Can't Spell Treason without Tea by Rebecca Thorne is another good sapphic romance about a guard for an evil queen who runs away to the borderlands and opens a tea/book shop with her head-of-the-mage-guild girlfriend. Lots of good plotty stuff and maybe more angst than your average fluff, but it's fun and features a cozy setting with locals who are eager to help. Should be first in a series, since the queen is definitely not going to let them get away with this.

I'm still watching for more and if anyone wants to add to the list feel free.

Also, now that I've delved into some cozy fantasy, I'd love to see more cozy scifi. Coffee shop/bookstore AUs are a delight.

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frowningfox · 9 months

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Various degrees of cuisine hot takes:

Elves are carnivores

dwarves eat lots of minerals but are not opposed to the occasional insect or mushroom

orcs are omnivores with a robust farming culture in their homeland

forest trolls are fruitarian and require a high sugar intake to stay active - animal protein is toxic to them and can cause them to go into a manic delirium often perceived as a “rage” after which they enter a torpor state.

Ogres eat dirt and worms n roots and stuff while they use their strong jaws to burrow into the earth.

smaller goblin species evolved from scavengers and carrion eaters, so modern goblins in a mixed societal setting have a tolerance of most culture’s cuisine

larger goblin species - the various hob goblins and bugbears - are omnivorous and fall somewhere between humans and small goblins in their foods

gnomes are insectivores with a side of berries/mushrooms depending on the subspecies

halfings eat seeds, berries and insects

Unrelated to foods but both Gnoll and Centaur are marsupials

#might make a kofi supporters only post to expand more on these topics and go into depth

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thewapolls · 9 months

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Original Wild Arms actually had much more conventional D&D derived Goblins, as well as Hob Goblin recolors. But also, an enemy originally called "Goblin Shaman" in Japanese was renamed "Orc Lord" in English. And the enemy called "Gnome" in English was actually "Goblin Princess" in Japanese.

Wild Arms 2 had some fun redesigning the goblins into a series of Gundam references, all based on classic 0079 Zeon mobile suits:

The GelGob referencing the Gelgoog both in color, headpiece, and double sided weapon

the standard Gob based on the Zaku Mk.2

a scrapped design sports the Gouf's signature curled shoulder spikes, heat whip, and command horn

and the less pronounced Rick Gob design and name appears to reference the Rick Dom.

Wild Arms 3 gave us what would become the enduring series staple design. And like in the original Wild Arms the Hob Gob(Boss) is an orange-ish variant of the standard gob. Also our first official Gob boss fight. Notably they keep and even opted to further lean into the Zaku heat-tomahawk inspired axe as their default weapon.

There's also the Bogle and the Cob, which appear to be references to the Bogles/Boggles of Scottish folklore and their association with Cobb's Causeway, aka "The Devil's Causeway." Supposedly Boggle does in fact etymological roots with "Goblin," and "Bogey" as well.

Alter Code F gives us "Brave Gob" along side the standard Gob and returning HobGob, although again screenshots of common enemies are tough to come by. Other than the color palette, their helmet insignia is different too. No other game's design seem to include marks of rank, which is a little odd; you'd think that'd be the easiest way to squeeze some extra variation out of minimal redesigns.

WA4 starts giving us variations like the Axe and Shotel Gobs, the shield and barbaroi gobs, and brings back Gob Princess for the first time since the original. They are upsettingly also featured on the backs of the Adult Mag enemy as part of what appears to be a call service ad... (the same design appears to have been carried over into WA5)

(not pictured above: WA4's version of Shield Gob)

Wild Arms 5's boss fights are most of what qualifies the gobs for this tournament at all, and account for the General, Chief, Director and Doctor, although the Japanese names more specifically denote a Division Commander, Chief, Staff Officer, and Doctor. There's also a Gob Commander(EN)/General GOB(JP). They are recolors or otherwise repurposed models of the preexisting Axe Gob, Shotel Gob, Shield Gob, Gob Princess, and Barbaroi Gob, respectively.

#wild arms 5 #wild arms #wild arms 2 #wild arms 3 #wild arms 4 #wild arms alter code f #gobs and gobs #gob propaganda #gobaganda #gob gob

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teejaystumbles · 30 days

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#dreamling #orc Hob #fic: good intentions #when will this happen? i don't know yet but it will (duh)#the sandman fanart #teejaystumbles

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tempest-in-spooky-earrings · 2 years

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Reading Legends & Lattes, then coming to tumblr, really expecting to find quite a bit of fanart. I mean, how can there not be a huge fandom already? There is this wonderful found family story happening. There's a sapphic romance between a retired orc adventuress and a succubus barista. There's an adorable little rattkin baker, and a hob carpenter, and a bard, and an elderly stone fey knitting while running her criminal empire. I want to see art of them all. Where is the art?

#reading #2022 reading #legends & lattes #legends and lattes #legends and lattes by travis baldree #like how is this book not wildly popular with tumblr's queer d&d crowd?#i want to recommend this book to all my dimension 20 people

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gaygoetia · 2 years

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I've been wondering for a little while what race everyone is playing as in A Court of Fey and Flowers, mechanically speaking, and Emily confirming Chirp is a Kenku has reignited by interest. So let's review:

Chirp: A Kenku! Of course she chose a bird-person (and one tailored to gossip and espionage no less.) One thing I'm curious about though is that kenku can't fly (according to their description in Volo's Guide to Monsters) which contradicts Chirp's comment that she flies better than she walks. I don't know if that was just an offhand joke and not something reflected mechanically or whether Chirp can fly but only through spellcasting.

As far as I remember she hasn't used the kenku's mimicry ability yet but her expert forgery is definitely gonna come in handy.

K P Hob: Brennan confirmed that Hob is a bugbear when describing his appearance right at the start of the series. He also used the bugbear's "long-limbed" ability in the duel with Andhera, confirming he's a bugbear both aesthetically and mechanical speaking.

Andhera: Andhera's sensitivity to sunlight confirms he's playing a drow but the dark purple skin and pointed ears were a strong clue. His ability to cast the spell 'Darkness' further confirmation as it's not a Paladin spell but is one of the drow's innate spells.

Squak: Given the strong bird theme, I suspect that, like Emily, Lou probably chose a bird-based race for Squak. Assuming he's not also a Kenku that leaves Aarakocra or Owlin. The main feature of both of these is the ability to fly - the difference being that Aarokocra can attack with their talons whereas Owlin have proficiency in stealth. The latter feels better suited to a game like this which is more focused on intrigue than combat.

Binx: I don't believe we've seen Binx fly (yet?) but she's described as small with wings so I assume she's a fairy? I mean someone has to be, right? It's literally the fey season!

Rue: Rue is the biggest mystery to me and I would love to hear everyone's thoughts on this! Before their identity reveal I would have assumed elf or genasi but now I'm stumped. Owlbear isn't an official playable race so unless it's something homebrewed it must be something else. The biggest, most "monstrous" playable races would probably be those with the 'Powerful Build' trait so: Bugbear (which would be poetic), Firbolg (has the misty step ability which we've seen Rue use), Goliath, Loxodon and Orc.

What do y'all think?

#acofaf #a court of fey and flowers #fey and flowers #my posts

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demonica-31 · 1 year

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Hey guys, I need a little bit of help. I’m doing a Halloween themed game on ClanGen, but I’m having trouble figuring out how to name my characters. The only names I’ve been able to come up with are

1. Pumpkin

2. Were/Wolf

3. Chocolate/Cocoa

4. Bone

5. Skeleton

6. Skull

7. Witch

8. Zombie

9. Dead

10. Franken

11. Undead

12. Gourd

13. Spider

14. Corpse

15. Mummy

16. Eerie

17. Creepy

18. Crypt

19. Fear

20. Web

21. Troll

22. Hob/Goblin

23. Blood/y

24. Corn

25. Sugar

26. Sweet

27. Sour

28. Spirit

29. Ghost

30. Ghoul

31. Wraith

32. Fright

33. Stitch

34. Rat

35. Needle

36. Beetle

37. Glow

38. Lantern

39. Grave

40. Tomb

41. Freaky

42. Sliver

43. Grim

44. Phantom

45. Tarantula

46. Eldritch

47. Maggot

48. Vampire

49. Bat

50. Midnight

51. Fairy

52. Sprite

53. Vulture

54. Mushroom

55. Worm

56. Wither(ing)

57. Wilt(ed)/(ing)

58. Demon

59. Slime(y)

60. Dead

61. Cinnamon

62. Caramel

63. Coconut

64. Wisp

65. Rot(ten/ting)

66. Coffin

67. Howl/ing

68. Scream(ing)

69. Gore

70. Casket

71. Fungus

72. Taffy

73. Buried

74. Banshee

75. Beast

76. Bean

77. Monster

78. Nougat

79. Peanut

80. Sprinkle

81. Syrup

82. Ooze

83. Gooey

84. Cream/y

85. Knife

86. Cleaver

87. Slash

88. Doll(y)

89. Frosting

90. Icing

91. Glaze

92. Cookie

93. Cake

94. Poison

95. Cider

96. Shark

97. Metal

98. Mold/y

99. Nightmare

100. Hiss/ing

101. Severe/d

102. Cadaver

103. Devil

104. Ro/bot

105. Carcass

106. Lollipop

107. Licorice

108. Gummy

109. Jellybean

110. Marshmallow

111. S’more

112. Frog

113. Pie

114. Walker

115. Brownie

116. Fudge

117. Sharp

118. Razor

119. Buried

120. Chip

121. Bitter

122. Cyborg

123. Cyber

124. Digital

125. Pixel

126. Pixie

127. Blade

128. Toadstool

129. Snake

130. Cobra

131. Glitch

132. Spine

133. Chill(ed/ing)

134. Coffee

135. Espresso

136. Tick

137. Leech

138. Sting

139. Serpent

140. Cauldron

141. Iron

142. Potion

143. Pudding

144. Vanilla

145. Flour

146. Piranha

147. Boar

148. Pig

149. Leather

150. Orca

151. Anaconda (don’t want none)

152. Gorilla

153. Alligator

154. Crocodile

155. Turkey

156. Citrus

157. Lemon

158. Lime

159. Unicorn

160. Dagger

161. Clown

162. Jester

163. Void

164. Leprechaun

165. Orc

166. Torn

167. Shattered

168. Tea

169. Butter

170. Butterfly

171. Diamond

172. Gem

173. Alien

174. Mocha

175. Banana

176. Mermaid

177. Siren

178. Angel

179. Soda

180. Popcorn

181. Voodoo

182. Rattle(d/ing)

183. Dragon

184. Scale(d)/Scaly

185. Blueberry

186. Raspberry

187. Mango

188. Strawberry

189. Grinning

190. Dancing

191. Latte

192. Spice/y

193. Cozy

194. Tar

195. Acid

196. Melt(ed/ing)

197. Autumn

199. Cheesecake

200. Twilight

201. Grape

202. Shard

203. Crisp(y)

204. Still

205. Rabid

206. Bitter

207. Twisted

208. Bullet

209. Charcoal

210. Feral

211. Griffin

212. Nymph

213. Melon

214. Crimson

215. Plum

216. Salt(y)

217. Ring

218. Somber

219. Hyena

220. Decay(ed/ing)

221. Whiskey

222. Margarita

223. Cocktail (that's a whole entire name right there!)

224. Beer

225. Pirate

226. Glitter

227. Moon

228. Powder

229. Heathen

230. Garlic

231. Firework

232. Trick

233. Treat

234. Widow

235. Eclipse

236. Butterscotch

237. Gargoyle

238. Honeydew (another full name!)

239. Pomegranate

240. Malt

241. Milk

242. Tangerine

243. Kiwi

244. Apricot

245. Blackberry

246. Cranberry

247. Fig

248. Papaya

249. Pineapple

250. Raisin

251. Eclair

252. Drowned/ing

253. Viper

254. Wicked

255. Glass

256. Gem

257. Jewel

258. Thrash(ed/ing)

259. Venom

260. Almond

261. Cashew

262. Pistachio

263. Walnut

264. Fruit(y)

265. Bomb

266. Cherry

267. Chamomile

268. Volt

269. Jolt

270. Punk

271. Goth

272. Emo

273. Grunge

274. Hex

275. Vex

276. Snap

277. Macabre

278. Crazy

279. Insane

280. Muffin

281. Chain/Saw

282. Hammer

283. Hook

284. Machete

285. Axe

286. Slice

287. Loon

288. Lunar

289. Phoenix

290. Nail

291. Balloon

292. Fizz/y

293. Foam/y

294. Froth/y

295. Spook/y

296. Flesh

297. Haunt(ed/ing)

298. Poltergiest

299. Apparition

300. Soul

301. Scare/crow (Another full name!)

302. Cold

303. Elf

304. Ogre (someBODY-)

305. Frenzy

306. Mirage

307. Spunk

308. Darkling

309. Minotaur

310. Basilisk

But here’s the thing. I’m running out of ideas! Can you guys help me come up with more names?

#please help #a little help here #Warrior cats #ClanGen #warriors #Warrior cat names #I’m out of ideas #clan gen #clan generator

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