Are there any Kallus fans out there? Because It's my favourite ISB agent time!

I was thinking today about Kallus. Just... You know he went off with Zeb to others Lasats. To their secret home Lira San. And he felt unease about it. He knew that Zeb told them what Alexandr did for Rebels, so they accepted his presence. But he couldn't bring himself to actually interact with them. He was the one who killed their friends, families. He very well remembered siege of Lasan. So he didn't eat with them, or talked to them a lot, or looked them in the eyes. He just couldn't.

But Zeb was always with him, he ate with him, lay with him, they talked, they trained. Lasats began to look at them as a pair and actually someone asked once if Kallus is even compatible with Zeb or breedable. It is a story for different occasion but it was very very very embarrassing day for Alexandr. But then he realized that he doesn't really mind it. Being a pair with Zeb in any way and that if he actually could spend rest of his life with him he would be more than happy.

One day he sat with them by the fire. It was some kind of holiday. He was looking at his bowl, and he felt as Zeb sat next to him. He looked on one of them, and she smiled and said something not in Basic. He looked at Zeb.

"She said that she is glad that you finally joined us." Zeb smiled.

And Kallus should felt relief at that moment. But he felt only remorse and pain. The bowl fell on the ground, and he just stood up and got back to their house. He just wanted to hide. Zeb sighed worried.

" One day he will be ready. Don't worry. You have to be patient. Empire do not teach people how to accept kindness, but he will learn."

Zeb nodded. He found Kallus on his bed just staring at the celling.

" Did somebody ever told you that you are your worst enemy, Alex?"

" i figured it out. " He looked at him "After you and your friends stopped occupying this position i gladly took over i guess. And i am just as determined as i was back then . "

Zeb sighed and lay next to him.

"i destroyed their people. Your people. I... Don't understand how you can even..."

"One day you just have to stop fighting Alex. "

" That would make me a loser."

Zeb hugged him and Alexandr hid his face in the fur.

"No. That would bring you peace."

" I am not sure if i deserve peace" he said silently. Zeb held him closer to himself.

"You'll be fine." He said maybe more to himself than to Kallus " You will. You deserve. You just need time. And i will give you time. As much as you need. "

And Kallus couldn't even bring himself to say thank you. He just clung to him and stayed silent.

Thinking a LOT about Lucifer in the latest Hazbin episode. Idk what I was expecting but not this??

As I was watching my immediate thought was just "huh... Lucifer is kinda of weird..." but as the episode went on I realized the issue

the dude is off the chain depressed, like he says it as a joke but holy cow it is SO BAD

He's manically just creating rubber ducks cuz his daughter really like it that one time but it's empty, it's never good enough but he keeps doing it, maybe cuz he doesn't know how to pass the time otherwise.

like I get the feeling he HAS better things he SHOULD be doing than making rubber duck after rubber duck. At first I was like, "Bruh why isn't the king of hell doing anything?" aaaaand then it became clear...

The dude is disassociating so bad he can barely hold a conversation let alone remember information. He clearly WANTS to, he wants to be involved with his daughter so bad, he wants to care about the things she's doing so bad, but his depression keeps interfering. It's like he can only hear every other word and he grasps onto the ones he does hear semi-out of context. Like you can see every time he catches something that he hadn't before and he just "well shit I didn't catch that part"

and that's why he reacts so weird when people talk to him. He is struggling so bad to engage with the conversation he's only getting 50% of it

does that look like the face of a man who knows what the hell the conversation is even about??? he is STRUGGLING

like Charlie spent so long telling him about the hotel, and he STILL didn't understand what she wanted. Yeah it comes off as ditzy but literally I've been in that position where your brain just "nope, not doing this right now" and nerfs your conversation comprehension. So as someone who's BEEN in that position, to me it feels exactly like what he's dealing with. He's sorta engaged with the conversation, but only as much as his brain will allow

For example, when I'm dealing with this, this is what someone talking to me feels like this where the crossed out parts are what I missed and bold is what I catch, "Hey! You know I was thinking for dinner we could either make some chicken with rice? But if you don't feel like cooking, pasta is super easy and you love that right? What do you want to do?" you can kinda get that someone is trying to talk to you about dinner, and towards the end you get the impression that they asked something that needs your input so you can decently put 2 and 2 together and try and pass off, but crucial bits were left out, I would have no idea that either chicken or pasta is in the conversation only having heard "rice". When someone is just talking at me, I can decently pass off as being engaged but the second I'm required to participate in the conversation I'm screwed. Seem familiar? At which point I have 2 options, try to give a bullshit answer, or admit that I missed what they were saying and ask them to repeat

Lucifer, unfortunately, is trying so damn hard to hide that he's dealing with like 24/7 dissociation, so he can't admit that he's missing entire chunks of the conversation, hence his really weird replies. He does eventually get the full picture and then he and Charlie start having the real conversation

Also, the Alastor/Lucifer rivalry was hilarious but also really indicative of more of what Lucifer is dealing with

Alastor is, unfortunately, really good at picking up people's insecurities, and thanks to Charlie's description earlier and watching Lucifer clearly trying to overcompensate, he immediately picks up on the fact that Lucifer KNOWS he struggles to be a good dad (we know cuz it's cuz of the depression, hard to be engaged when your brain keeps turning off) and decides to rub salt in the wound by pretending he's been acting as a surrogate father to Charlie. Now why Alastor decided to pick a fight with the king of hell is beyond me, I do not understand Alastor (and I LIKE IT) (maybe it's cuz Alastor thinks he's hot shit and was expecting Lucifer to at least have heard of him but Lucifer just treats him like a nobody? who knows)(why would Lucifer listen to radio anyways when he can't even pay attention to a conversation it'd just be white noise)

But yeah I just was expecting someone who oozed either charisma or presence and instead I got a depressed dad who's dissociating so bad he can barely function and be present in his life. The only thing it seems he CAN do is make rubber ducks cuz his daughter really liked it that one time

Idk Lucifer is tragic to me. Whatever the full details of what heavan did to him absolutely broke him and he can't deal with it. He's aware of it, and he doesn't know how to fix it, so he tries to over compensate and sorta makes an ass out of himself but no one says or does anything cuz this guy is supposed to be THE king of hell

Suddenly it's making a lot more sense why he just rolls over and lets heaven do what it wants and even told Charlie to go in his place the start of the show. He's not in any headspace to hold a basic conversation let alone negotiate! He didn't even know who Alastor was, he's been so out of touch

idk I like him, he seems sweet, I hope Charlie brings some light back into his life. He really needs to get out of that rubber duck room

#the Nowhere Man who waits and the God of Stories who watches

I'm rewatching Steven Universe and I will never forgive Fandom for what it did to her

I can’t believe I went through all of Season 2 assuming Nina was the stand-in for Crowley when you actually pay attention it’s so CLEAR that she’s Aziraphale. I was tricked by her spiky, sarcastic, cynical outer shell and lulled into a false sense of security by Maggie’s bubbly optimism and wholesome goodness, because on the surface they reflect the ineffable husbands perfectly, in their personalities, their aesthetics, even many of their actions and morals. but not, and this is the real key, when it comes to their “relationship”. but those first impressions really had me damn fooled. 

I missed the blatantness of Nina’s “we’re just friends. actually we’re not friends. we barely know each other.” the same thing Aziraphale said in season 1.  the way he still struggles to quantify their friendship when Nina asks. Nina’s sarcasm when Crowley asks about rain and awnings because it worked for him (we all know it LMAO). hell, that whole convo the girls have in the rain is so AziraCrow (“I know. I’m not your type” “...You have no idea” hits so much harder the second time, help meeeee.) “Lindsay” maybe being symbolic of Heaven and Aziraphale’s toxic relationship with them and their abuse? (the handwritten text messages in red pen make me think of angry notes on paperwork, anyone else?) because Crowley has never actually cared about what Hell thinks of him, just not getting into trouble (or him or Aziraphale getting hurt). Maggie is always chasing Nina. NINA NEVER GOES IN THE RECORD STORE. Just like Crowley always goes to the bookstore, to Aziraphale, Zira NEVER WENT TO THE FLAT (apart from The Swap but that doesn’t count imo). Crowley has always chased Zira, not the other way around. Always there to rescue him, always going to him for company, always relying on their shared connection, always US. OUR SIDE. All through season one, he comes to Zira every time to work together, never trying to work alongside Hell in any way that isn’t to save their skins or Earth, while Zira hides things from Crowley because he STILL thinks Heaven is ultimately good and will do the right thing if he can just show them. fix it from the inside. 

Maggie working up the courage to finally say something, to put herself out there, while Nina is utterly oblivious and then when she does realise Maggie has feelings, becoming standoffish, putting up that barrier, fighting it, denying it, ITS SO CROWLEY AND AZIRAPHALE IN THAT ORDER. the way I was fooled into thinking Nina’s trust issues are Crowley because he does have trust issues ofc he does BUT Crowley has ALWAYS TRUSTED AZIRAPHALE. has always relied on him. has always been hurt when Aziraphale doesn’t immediately reciprocate the way he expects (the holy water request, the bandstand, the “off in the stars” etc). he’s always the one putting himself forward. Aziraphale has always been the one to second guess everything, to fight their connection, their similarities, their friendship. the girls really made me think it was going to be okay when they sat Crowley down, even as my inner sirens were going haywire about Metatron interfering, they were telling Crowley he just needs to open up and it’ll all work out BUT HE’S ALREADY AT THAT POINT. he may not say it, and by gosh is that part of their damn problem, but he’s always SHOWN IT. he’s not Nina who needs time to heal and recover from her broken trust, he’s always been Maggie believing it doesn’t matter, they’ll end up together in the end anyway AND I WALKED RIGHT INTO THE TRAP THAT THIS MEANT THEY WERE GOING TO BE OKAYYYYYYYYYYY

we breathe, eat, fall in love and die

hear me out hear me out hear me out..... dracopia but it's the dracula (1992) rendition (prints!)

24 hour time loops: not long enough to create or undo anything permanent, crazy-making but often still funny

365 day time loops: the most fucked up shit you could possibly imagine

everyone stop. walker’s eyes noticeably take in the colour of his surroundings.

meaning he naturally canonises one of the oldest headcanons in the fandom.

PERCY’S EYES CHANGE COLOUR

god i love skk sm i wish gay ppl were real :(

who wanna scamper through the forests w me

💛 The Boi 💛

Hello, hope y'all are doing well! (^^)/ Wanted to make a quick post to let y'all know that my annual January curse has breeched containment and I'm currently in the middle of organizing sudden household repairs and unexpected medical appointments and miscellaneous stress sgdfgh-- 🫠 All that to say: no new video this week while I'm stuck grappling with all of the above sgdfksfd -- but here's a doodle of Heartless in the meantime! I wanna figure out a more solid design for his ghouls 🤔👻

Loki 2x01 // 2x02

» KILLING EVE (2018-2022)

9-1-1 7.03 "Capsized"