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transmandonnie · 1 year

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5, 7, 9 apex. 13 for engineer tf2. 10 and 24 for ur little uhhh gay men fighting kaijus shows

meme

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

LOL yes. sorry to everybody but waaay back around apex season 1 the mir*gehound fandom was so annoying that I stopped shipping them cold turkey. nobody would ship miragetane with me after that, but they still hold some place in my cold dead apex heart

I'm pretty sure there's been other ships like this, but this is definitely the most recent example.

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?

The above, but also ummm just. multiplayer first person shooters in generalJKLFDJKLDFSKLDSLKDSLK y'all's fandoms suck dick n balls. uhhh. h*mestuck. comic book fandoms. can't think of much else

[apex] 9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

Sorry I just do not like Wattson. As an autistic person I love getting representation but she is not what I'm looking for. Her writing is bad and the ship is forced. If she was a lesbian she would have massive character growth, I think. At this point, I don't think there's a single redeemable trait in her for me.

Who else. Caustic. I don't have a reason I'm just bad-hairline-phobic I guess and I'm sore about his gameplay. Oh right Valkyrie. She's like a lesbian written by a straight man. I could write a dissertation about that.

Everybody else has some sort of charming point, I guess, so I'm not ranking those. also I feel like saying more is gonna get me burned LMFAO

13. Unpopular opinion about Engineer?

I'm gonna be real with you. The TF2 fandom is the most chill fandom I've ever been in. There literally aren't any popular opinions about Engineer that I disagree with. Except maybe that I don't actually like the beard look on him, but I feel like you're well within your right to decide that for yourself when you're 40+ years old. I treat him like he's a real person because he is my friend and I respect him so much.

[KAMEN RIDER ASKS WOO WOO WOO]

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

I can't really point out specific arcs within seasons because everything is so intertwined and so chaotic I can't really make heads or tails out of it tbh. I do have to say some seasons have absolutely godawful pacing in some episodes and the ~50 episode ~24min runtime limit is really harming the storytelling. I get that it's supposed to be digestible for kids and it depends on the director, and sometimes I actually like this type of thing! but they really do rapid-fire stuff at you in the newer seasons lmao 😭 this show is so adhd about their characters

24. Would you recommend Kamen Rider to a friend? Why or why not?

yes yes yes a hundred times yes. If you liked Power Rangers, Jojo's Bizarre Adventure or superheroes at any point (or anything that's like this, for that matter), you will ESPECIALLY like Kamen Rider. Because it has a SHITTON of (mostly disconnected) seasons however, I recommend starting with any heisei-era shows that catch your interest in its general theme (although if you pick Decade or Ex-Aid as your first show, god help you). I've watched Den-O, OOO and Wizard, which are all extremely good, and I'm planning to watch more of W, Build and Ghost. The suits are excellent, the themes really hit home and it's overall a fun time. If you want to start with the most recent shows though (not sure why you would want to but ok), Revice is REALLY good for the gay ass dynamic, and if you want to see a fundamental misunderstanding of Apex Legends, watch Geats.

Also Momotaros is in Den-O. You agree. You will watch it.

#ask #seerofmike #oops this is an essay.#ask me about kamen rider and I will infodump. i will not apologize

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therantingsage · 24 days

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Because I promised this, and I really wanted to do it anyway, here's a really really long-winded rambling dissertation on:

Why N and Uzi secretly dating since before episode 5 is genuinely super plausible and also stupidly hilarious /pos

Under the cut cuz it got obscenely long oops-

Idk where to start, so I'll just cover my bases: why people think they've been in a relationship already in the first place.

We all saw this scene:

And legit it can only be implying one of two things. Either A: this is his confession of feelings for her. Or B: this is him admitting that they've been dating for a while at this point. With the hearts it's pretty clear that this statement is meant to be romantically interpreted, and Nori's aghast reaction confirms that that's how it's being interpreted.

Obviously no matter the interpretation, N only writes that because he can't think of anything else to snap Uzi out of it and thereby stop this confrontation from ending poorly. And it works obviously so good on him for the quick thinking.

Two things that make me lean towards the 'we're dating' interpretation over 'confession' interpretation, though: firstly, he's not writing this to tell Uzi something, he specifically calls out to Nori before writing it. "Hey btw I'm dating your daughter" makes more sense than "Hey btw I like your daughter romantically" because if it was the latter, Nori has far less reason to be mad at Uzi about it rather than N. It's not like Uzi can control how N feels. But if they're dating, that means Uzi is partially to blame for that and Nori can get upset at HER.

Secondly, the awkward wording. Like it's really vague and without the hearts you'd have no reason to assume anything but platonic meaning. But these are words we, and him, have heard before:

...from Uzi, in response to a question about who she is and, by proxy, the nature of their relationship. She says it defensively, follows it up by telling N to shut up. N repeating her wording which, again, is a description of the nature of their relationship....but this time implying something romantic with it, it suggests the idea that it had romantic implications the first time.

I don't think it's far-fetched to say Uzi at least has feelings for N at this point in the story. I don't think anyone's arguing that that's not true. But the idea that 'hang out' means the exact same thing both times is what I'm arguing here. They're dating, but this version of N is a stranger to her. A cute stranger, as she says, but a stranger nonetheless who she isn't comfortable admitting to that she's dating him in the future to his face.

Backing up a bit, Uzi's reaction to Nori's reaction:

This is a clear and obvious parallel to the previous episode, when 'Tessa' says "Don't date my robot, please."

In both instances, someone gets on her case about the idea of them dating, and in both cases she doesn't deny it but instead defends both his and her own agency in the matter. No one is allowed to tell them what to do and Uzi refuses to let anyone try.

When Nori says it, though, she does seem to try and deny it for a moment. "I'm not-" She cuts herself off so we can't say for certain what she was going to say (if anything. it's entirely possible she started that sentence with no plan how to finish it, I do that a lot personally). But that's also because, like, she's Uzi. If this was meant to be a secret relationship, it would probably be her who made that decision. And like with butler N, she has no reason to disclose that kind of information to a stranger. She'd probably try and deny it whether its true or not.

As for when it would've started, after camp is the only big timeskip where we don't have much clue went on during. Cabin Fever is a big episode for them, and the three episodes that come after it are all back-to-back-to-back. The only time it makes sense to have started is sometime between eps 4 and 5.

And guys. Guys.

This, more than anything to me, paired with the idea that they've been dating for a while by the time the most recent couple episodes happen.....doesn't this seem so, so romantic? You could easily call this a love confession! So easily! It sounds like one much more than 'we just kinda are hanging out a lot idk' at least.

Like, rephrase that even a little: "Being with you makes scary things fun. Being with you makes me feel brave. It makes me feel safe. So I want to keep being with you."

And Uzi agrees with that sentiment. He promises to stick with her. And she laughs and smiles with him as he makes the scary thing she's been dealing with into something fun, something they can laugh about. The together line gets repeated in the most recent episode, directly calling back to this scene as well.

Like, just...AGH. In Cabin Fever he says it once as they're falling and a second time once they're grounded. The second time its a question, and one she eagerly answers with physical affection, which is super rare for her. In Mass Destruction its a statement, because he already knows her answer. Its a repeated promise. A vow.

Backing up again. Let's assess some interactions under this context. Assuming they're dating in secret. Because it paints so many things in a different light and basically nothing contradicts it which is fricken wild. This:

Isn't a sheepish Uzi trying to hold her crush's hand in a moment of fear. This is an Uzi who wants to keep their relationship a secret but is so in need of comfort right now she's willing to risk exposing them to get it.

This:

Her being so relieved because she almost watched him die but he's alive he's ok and she doesn't care who sees it because she needs to hug her boyfriend rIGHT NOW GUYS I DON'T CARE I'M HUGGING MY BOYFRIEND-

This whole scene. Uzi interacts with him so gently here. She's not gentle with anybody else at all. She sees him stressed and uses his own "you good?" on him and it's just so dang tender when you think about it. Because no one else can hear them talking to each other. It's just these two sending face texts and everyone else's focus is on the Sentinal so they can afford to be as couple-y in this conversation as they want.

And after:

Blushing because they like each other so so dang much.......sweating bullets because the other two can see them do this. Suddenly without either of them really thinking about it they're being romantic around other people and wow! That's nerve-wracking! Peak young love early-in-the-relationship behavior they ain't slick.

His tone of voice in this scene is gentler I think than we've ever heard from him before (Michael Kovach you are so damn good at your job). His loss-filled fury is cooled in an instant when he realizes how close he came to hurting his girlfriend. It's heartbreakingly gentle before 'Tessa' cuts him off.

And when she cuts Uzi off:

He looks like genuinely pissed at her. "Did you really just interrupt my gf while she was talking?? She's scared and you're disrespecting her tf is wrong with u??"

And like- the fact he was genuinely willing to off Tessa for her. Like he realizes there's a possibility she tried to get his gf killed for no reason and upon her not even trying to deny it he just kills her instantly. Because it's no longer a question of the universe or Uzi. It's a question of Tessa or Uzi, and its a choice his heart has already made before this point.

But here's like. The thing about all this that gets me. This is meant to be a secret relationship, right? Like nobody but them is supposed to know about this. And the fact that we the audience didn't have any reason to assume them to be an established relationship without heavy headcanoning means they did a decent job at that, right?

Guys. Guys.

N is terrible at keeping secrets. Like. Horrendously bad at keeping things on the down-low. Every single time in the series he's supposed to not spill info he like. Fails. It's wild. And because the relationship happens after "Inclusive reflexes!" that means that Uzi damn well knows this and still trusts him to try.

But based on V's reaction to the handholding in Dead End:

I'm honestly willing to bet she knew. She doesn't sound surprised, just annoyed that she has to see it. Which means N probably like, heard her badmouthing Uzi or something and got like way too defensive about it and she clocked him instantly. Because he's bad at keeping secrets. And she doesn't bother mentioning it during any of these episodes out loud because she doesn't care what these idiots do in their free time.

Can you imagine how many hundred close calls they must've had? How many times Uzi must've had to aggressively shush him or cover his mouth because he was going to say something slightly too sappy in public? The only reason we don't get to see the time period between eps 4 and 5 is because it would've been painfully obvious that these two dating is the worst kept secret in the entire bunker. I'm going insane.

Uzi fell in love with a proud himbo and they both know it. It's genuinely a miracle they didn't clue the audience in sooner.

#Murder Drones #Murder Drones Spoilers #md N #md Uzi #Uzi Doorman #Nuzi #Biscuitbites #Listen!! I'm feral and I site my sources!!!#This is a hill I'm willing to die on. And then I will rise to keep talking #I miss doing posts like this. I have so so much to say always #Me when I hyperfixate to the point of essays. Oops. Glad I can read

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belethlegwen · 5 months

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#had to get this out this morning when my sister sent me the link #hbomberguy #illuminaughtii #video essay #on the h. burgerguy channel #iiluminaughtii #didn't catch the typo #oop

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liondanosaur · 4 months

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Dan and Phil, phandom expectations, the complexities of queer dynamics and how they are erased by people.

I'm going to start this by stating that this isn't directed towards anyone who makes jokes about things like "phivorce" or "our married dads" or fainting a bit (me too) over dan saying phil is a power bottom. It is also not to fault anyone for being young during 2009-2019 and not understanding boundaries or how badly you overstepped when you were a teen or younger, but about people who are still active in this community and have genuine expectations about Dan and Phil’s life and what they should be sharing with us.

For a long time, Dan and Phil's relationship has been romanticised and sexualised throughout many different mediums such as fanfics, tumblr blogs inspecting small movements and amounting them to intense theories and so on. Dan and Phil themselves have stated they don't have issues with fan fictions, and neither do I - however, overtime when people's basis for the fantasy of what dan and phil could do or could say have become distorted from reality (for some people within the fandom). Some examples would be, people's expectations on their sleeping situations, their sexual and romantic lives & the way that they would eventually "announce" their relationship.

But for me, the main issue has always ended up being the erasure of queer connections that tend to contradict what people expect from them. There is no basis with queer relationships for what they need to be, when two people find themselves in a queer relationship in any way, there's no expectation of the way it should play out. In heterosexual relationships, there is a worldwide accepted idea (which isn't fair, but has always been the assumed basis for along time) that it should be, dating, marriage, house and then children and so many different expectations of small things based on culture and country.

Queer couples don't have an outline and tend to be able to make their own.

The truth is, is that Dan and Phil will never fit into the heterosexual stereotypes people eagerly want from them, because they are two queer men. Queer relationships are unconventional fundamentally. Two people could be a couple and sleep in separate beds, never kiss and not engage in sexual acts together and still be a queer couple, they could also be married and sleep in the same bed but not be sexually involved or literally anything they choose, because there's no one telling them what to be. I won't make assumptions on what they are because this post is mainly about counteracting that , but all that I mean to say is that, every aspect of a queer relationship can just be decided by the two people, which tends to make for a relationship where things can be different from the normal concept of how we see heterosexual relationships displayed in media and in life. Queer people get to decide every small detail based on if they feel comfortable with those different things, instead of heterosexual relationships where a lot of the time people feel that there is a preconceived notion of how the relationship should play out.

There seems to be this agreement in the phandom that dan and phil haven't confirmed themselves fully to be dating, "but they are but aren't but are but aren't", and I think what people miss is that is what a queer relationship is like. No, dan and phil will most likely never make a video saying "we are married, this is the bed we sleep in together every night" and then kiss on camera, because why would anyone? They've said many times they are together, but people always crave more - because the way they say it isn't in some intensely straight on YouTube in your face manner, it's just casual - the same way its casual for anyone in a decade long queer relationship to not make a massive deal out of their relationship.

For a long time people have had a vision, due to imagine posts on Tumblr, fan fictions about it, and loads of other things, that it would be some grand announcement - that they are married and had a secret wedding and all of these over saturations of exceptions from two normal people who gave us the safe space and shared their lives with us. You will most likely always only receive dan agreeing that him and phil are 'just like a normal gay relationship', or describing themselves as "best friends, arch enemies, husbands, business partners, partners in crime, soulmates, just mates, who the fuck knows?'.

I think, for a lot of people who lived out their teenage or younger years of they lives reading, thinking or fantasising about dan and phil one day being out, the way it's occurred may have felt anticlimactic because of the high expectations of how someone would give out a really sensitive part of themselves to the world. To have lived in the thoughts that they would have made a big deal out of things, it can make the way they approach it seem disappointing in a way, to the point that people are still expecting an announcement about a marriage or at least their relationship some time soon - even though dan says he hates commitment (which can mean many different things, and people view what commitment is in various different ways), most gay couples don't tend to get married and phil's said how daunting having a wedding sounds in the past.

Dan and phil have an extremely special bond, one that even dan has explained transcends any human relationship, and to say that they might not share a bed, or maybe they aren’t romantic in ways you may expect, or maybe they are, or maybe there’s lots of complexities to the way they are with each other, those things don’t take away from the deep connection they have. People shouldn’t reduce their deep connection by the expectations of what they want a relationship to be, if they have separate beds, if they have a shared one, if they are comfortable in a middle ground of just existing in each others presence without ever tying a public word to what their dynamic is - all of it is down to them to share. When you experience such a strong connection with another person, and have for over a decade, it cannot be tied up in a neat bow for people, and it must be daunting to know that people have a preconceived notion of what they desire them to be, and that they can’t meet all the standards people want from them.

Dan and Phil transcend any normal expectations of a relationship, and to admit that isn’t to erase the connection they have, but rather to accept that this expectation of a heteronormative relationship between two queer individuals is limiting to how deep their connection truly is, and is erasing that queer connections are much different and can be much stronger than an average straight relationship. It is also important to not erase their friendship just to speak about their romantic relationship, because their platonic relationship is extremely important, and is something that is so special.

I guess the main consensus is that people need to understand the complexities of queer relationships, that queer platonic couples exist (which may not be what Dan and Phil are, they could be what lots of people want them to be, but there's no acknowledgement of the possibility of it being something like that), and that if you're going to be speaking about queer couples, at least comprehend how they aren't going to be a heteronormative idealistic couple, and how a lot of people need to stop expecting them to be.

This isn't to stomp on lighthearted jokes we and dan and phil make, like funny comments about our divorced dad's when dan went on tour or how we are the children of old gay rats or anything that is of course lighthearted fandom bantering and not something you expect them to actually ever meet the expectations of, but more so a commentary on the way that people still discuss things they have made clear that they do not want speculation on, and things they have many times set boundaries on. A lot of people's fantasy of a big "we are together" YouTube announcement most likely won't occur, because of the amount of times they have reiterated their want to keep private things private, and that is okay. That doesn’t take away from the strong relationship that is present between them or the magic in their videos or dynamic.

We all collectively love dan and phil, that's why we are all here, watch and love them. It's time, really, to accept that they are simply two amazing silly boys who live together in their forever home and choose to share their lives with us, and that should be enough for people, and if it isn't - it would be good (not in a cruel way, but from one phan to another) to reevaluate if you are overstepping something that is blatantly going over a boundary and if you have a fantasy image of them that you’re pushing onto them.

I’d also love to hear anyone else’s points on this topic as I feel like I could also write 800 more paragraphs, and if you have any additions or disagreements or just general discussion about it - I’m open to hearing anyones opinions as I think queer dynamics don’t get discussed enough :-] thank you for reading!

#my long essay has arrived #big rant moment oops #dan and phil #dnp #phan #dnpgames #dan howell #amazingphil #daniel howell #phil lester #danisnotonfire #queer community #queer

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quinn-pop · 7 months

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let’s do some autistic meta knight headcanons!! over explaining my interpretation of meta knight yet again wooooo

this orb has NO idea how to talk to people!!! outside of work anyway. a lot of this is partially due to upbringing (suppressing his emotions all the time) but he does not know how to express emotions, like…at all.

this goes into a few things

1. yeah talking is hard. even after figuring out what he wants to communicate he will struggle. conversation can be so overwhelming, especially under pressure. he will need time lol

2. because of that, forming connections is hard. i really don’t think meta is much for shallow relationships, and certainly not early in the timeline. which also means he has very little experience with friendship. so a lot of the relationships he did have went kinda neglected, and issues that probably could’ve been worked on by talking became…*cough romk* escalated.

3. honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if meta convinced himself he couldn’t feel emotion (anymore) until like. katam-ish. he tried very hard lol

vulnerability is terrifying. (though this gesture here is also just comforting, like his little cape cocoon thing he does.)

unmasking—yeah im taking the mask thing very literally here—is a big deal and a very slow process for mk. i’m sure he has a lot of feelings on that lol. it served as a way to ensure no one could ever, y’know, see him.

i can’t say i think he’d ever fully ditch it—there’s always gonna be some days that are more stressful than others and if having it could help him get through it, it just makes sense. mainly when working.

it really is about vulnerability. granted, i don’t think he has the most expressive face (in my head every astral just tends to stare at things) but i doubt he has much control over it. can’t fake a smile but also can’t hide it. probably blushes easy because yeah, astrals; just look at kirby’s face.

just the idea that someone might be able to read his expression and know what he’s feeling before he’s ready for them to (or even understands it himself…) yeah he doesn’t want that

but emotional turmoil aside, i think his mask also hides a lot of his stims

remember that whole “suppressing your feelings” thing? yeah turns out that ignoring half your instincts isn’t a good idea. so in true meta knight style, he tries to stim as subtly as possible

1. he has the least control over his wings, so they will flick and twitch on their own. they’re usually a good indicator of how he’s feeling, not unlike the body language usually seen in cat ears and tails lol. flapping is also an extension of this of course, though he probably suppresses it more.

2. this also effects when he takes his wings out. pretty much every time he’s excited or nervous it just happens. kinda makes me wonder if his wing cape ordeal might also go into the suppression thing… (i’d say yes, but using a cape is also very comforting so it’s not necessarily a bad thing)

3. going back to the mask thing; he stims a lot underneath it. think like biting or pursing your lips. he bites his tongue and clicks his mouth. that sort of thing. his mask also makes it harder to notice that he is constantly sighing, humming, grumbling…all that

one nice thing about the mask though is that it helps a little bit with lights!!! woo

(look at him and his magically floating glasses)

sensory stuff—i think he’s mostly bothered by light and sound. maybe a bit of texture. he’s pretty sensory avoidant and perfectly happy standing off to the side not touching anything.

the one exception to this is physical affection, which is, despite all of this, most of how he shows affection. it’s a lot easier to hug someone than to try to explain your feelings for them, after all.

i think he would like pressure though. so that’s probably part of it. and i’m pretty sure there’s some connection in here to fighting (dang, is that the only way he knows how to get his energy out?)

anyway, pretty much all of this is in contrast to kirby, who i would gladly nominate as the champion of Doing Whatever He Wants. he might pick up a few bad habits, but he will never mask the way meta knight does. he might not understand how he feels, but he’s in tune enough to express it…usually.

this is a very good thing for meta because it helps him to do the same thing. kirby’s so energetic, it’s hard to not want to stim with him. it reminds meta to be kinder to himself and explore his own emotions. he can also help kirby understand themselves, so this connection is very important.

yeah, at the end of the day, everything kinda just boils down to kirby and mk as parallels

this is the conclusion i promise

to me, meta’s arc is about growing stronger by growing kinder, and this is mostly by learning to be kind to himself. letting himself be a person again, loving and understanding other people, and eventually, letting go of all the expectations placed on him and doing the things he’s always wanted to do…

autism headcanons are fun for me because it’s cathartic to write, but at the same time, it just makes sense in this sort of narrative. meta is, to me, inseparable from these things. and so is kirby! that’s a dynamic that’s a lot of fun to play with, and it’s at the heart of my kirby interpretation.

if you actually read all this WOW thank you

#i almost considered not posting this on a wednesday but then i wrote everything and uhhh yeah i think i gotta so #happy cringe day wednesday #for as many notes as i have on these characters i really don’t talk about it much #but meta knight is a special case because i am terrible at subtlety and he wouldn’t be meta knight without it #so this is to contextualize some things #because of what ill have in the next few days haha #basically these are just things i consider when writing meta #but a lot of it is subtextual and i dont know how well it comes across #kirbyposting #kirby #meta knight #headcanons #autism headcanon #this is practically an essay lol oops #i have like 2/3 of a fic that explores most of this in a way i probably won’t do again #but we’ll see if i ever finish it #god kirby concepts are so fun to chew on #i overthink everything i make so much lol

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iridescentmirrorsgenshin · 2 months

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An analysis of Alhaitham's egoism in relation to Kaveh

(Update: The essay this is taken from is now uploaded! It can be accessed here and here as as a pdf <3)

Max Stirner's anarchist egoism is speculated to be the basis of Alhaitham's personal egoism, therefore I will be drawing upon Stirner's 'The Unique and Its Property' for this analysis.

Property and power are key principles within this philosophy. The egoist recognises himself as an individual, separate from the general collective of “humanity”, in which concepts such as freedom and property are governed to and over the people, for then the individual is not considered as such, rather they are a part of “humanity”, rather than a whole individual (Stirner, 170). This thinking is demonstrated within Alhaitham’s Story Quest, where he dismantles Siraj’s Hivemind by targeting individuals that compromised the Hive and reminding them of their own beliefs and preferences – the individual in themselves is a whole, and is not a “part” of a system (Stirner, 170).

In this, the egoist governs himself by what he owns and what he wants to own: “ownness is my whole essence and existence, it is myself. I am free from what I am rid of, owner of what I have in my power, what I control. I am at all times and under every circumstance my own”(Stirner, 106). This relates to the concept of freedom, which, for an egoist exists according to having the power to be free of something, for example, being freed of hunger, thirst, or societal expectations (Stirner, 105). This is reflected within Alhaitham’s description: “He lives free – free from the searching eyes of ordinary people,” but also extends to the power to own.

As power is considered something which the egoist owns, property then becomes something which the egoist exerts power over, and in this, can property be made use of by the egoist – all the while, the property remains an independent vessel (Stirner, 162). This is seen within Alhaitham’s view on his vision, in that it is “no more than a useful tool”, as it can be used to serve his own needs, and that since it in his possession, he has obtained it with his own power, it makes no difference to check on it as he continues to retain that power.

In this sense then, Alhaitham has constructed his life around this form of egoism, in that anything he wants, he has, such as his job as the Scribe, his house, the interests he pursues, the people he enjoys. In order to maintain this way of life, he will deal with, or be rid of, anything he deems as "harmful".

With this, the egoist seeks satisfaction in themselves through the satisfaction of another. Ownership, in relation to another person, can become love, which like all things the egoist has power over, is ultimately theirs – as in their love for a person (Stirner, 187), which is given willingly by the egoist, for loving a person is done for the satisfaction that love brings: “But I love them with the awareness of egoism; I love them because love makes me happy, I love because love is natural to me, it pleases me,” (186).

In loving another comes sacrifice, which the egoist can give into without compromising himself, as he himself sets the “purchase price of [his love]” (187) according to the happiness attributed to the loved one, as in return, the egoist shall also receive happiness (186). To enjoy someone, in an egoist fashion, is to be able to sacrifice all possessions and ownerships without foregoing the sense of an individual, of “ownness”, as the egoist would then lose his objectivity:

“I can deny myself countless things to heighten his pleasure, and I can risk for him what would be dearest to me without him, my life, my welfare, my freedom. Indeed, it forms my pleasure and happiness to feast on his pleasure and happiness. But me, myself I do not sacrifice to him, but rather remain an egoist and—enjoy him. If I sacrifice to him everything I would keep without my love for him, that is very easy… But if I sacrifice others to one passion, I still do not… sacrifice my particular worth, my ownness. Where this nasty incident occurs, love looks no better than any other passion that I blindly obey.” – The Unique and Its Property, 185

It is relevant to note that just as the egoist receives happiness from a loved one’s pleasure, so does an egoist suffer from a loved one’s despair. Just as the egoist would sacrifice something of their own to provide happiness for a loved one in order to exact their own happiness, so too would an egoist sacrifice something, or act, to eradicate the root problem of a loved one’s misery, as this, in turn, would then resolve their own misery:

“If I see the beloved suffering, I suffer with him, and I find no rest until I’ve tried everything to comfort and cheer him…. It doesn’t follow from this that the same thing causes suffering… his tooth gives him pain, but his pain gives me pain. But because I cannot bear the sorrowful crease on the beloved forehead, therefore, then for my sake, I kiss it away. If I didn’t love this person, he could go right on creasing his forehead, that wouldn’t trouble me; I’m only driving away my troubles. – The Unique and Its Property, 186

The phrasing of “driving away… troubles” is particular to note here, due to similar usages of language used within Alhaitham’s Character Stories, in relation to him acting in accordance with his self-governed rules and serving his own self-interest by: “[acting] on his own will and deals with anything that appears harmful in his eyes”.

Kaveh, however, interprets Alhaitham’s egoism as a detached, pragmatic view of humanity, in which the individual isolates themselves not only as a means of prioritisation, but by elevating oneself over others by refusal to intermingle and to cooperate for the benefit of others. Not only is this a harmful opposition to Kaveh’s view of individuals sharing their knowledge and talent in order to pursue a better society, but due to Kaveh’s experience of Alhaitham’s personal egoism, it is harmful to Kaveh personally. Kaveh refuses to prioritise himself over others because he has seen a negative consequence of egoism, in which he has been “cut to the quick” and it has ended one of the few stable relationships in his life.

By Kaveh seeing Alhaitham’s comment about his altruism as malicious, Alhaitham has elevated himself over Kaveh, since Alhaitham does not have the same struggles as him, and has trivialised Kaveh’s trauma. To Kaveh, Alhaitham’s prioritisation of the self actively harms others as it desensitises the self to the emotions of others. Therefore, Kaveh opposes the egoism which Alhaitham advocates for, since he interprets it through his own lived experience. Hence, by Alhaitham asserting egoism over Kaveh as a means of Kaveh prioritising himself, it only reinforces Kaveh to strive to consider the feelings of others, as well as to not prioritise his own way of thinking if it undermines someone else’s.

In actuality, Alhaitham’s frustrations with Kaveh lie in his belief that Kaveh’s talents are incongruous with his values, and that if Kaveh were to prioritise himself, he would save himself suffering and enable himself to discover his “true self”, unrestricted by others placing labels onto him.

This is a personal frustration which Alhaitham would not compromise himself to assert onto a person he was indifferent to, due to his belief of not getting involved with other’s fates. However, he has been observed to ‘subvert’ his own rules to accommodate Kaveh. Through egoism, it can be seen that rather than ‘subverting’ these rules, Alhaitham adheres to them as an egoist, since he sees Kaveh as his mirror, they offer each other a contrasting perspective he believes they need to have a complete, objective vision of the world.

This is necessary for Alhaitham to consider within his own life, and therefore has extended his house to Kaveh, in order to expand his scope of thinking, and to consider perspectives he otherwise would not entertain. Kaveh’s ideals, his beliefs, and his philosophies explicitly interest Alhaitham, in contradiction with Kaveh believing that Alhaitham is disdainful of his perspectives.

In this way, Alhaitham enjoys Kaveh. He willingly pays for some of Kaveh’s tabs; pays for crates of wine for the two of them; and goes out of his way to pursue interactions with Kaveh. Just as Alhaitham is to Kaveh, Kaveh is an old friend, as unchanged in his beliefs as he was in the past and thus is a constant: “the most unshakable part of one's past is a friend that will never change”’.

Alhaitham strives to act in accordance to his own egoism and therefore assesses what “appears harmful” to him, in relation to these rules, so as to be rid of them. This can be extended to Kaveh, as Kaveh falls under what ‘belongs’ to Alhaitham, in the sense that ownership equates to Alhaitham’s enjoyment.

Alhaitham wants to have Kaveh in his life due to the alternate perspective which Kaveh offers him, thus expanding his horizons and granting him knowledge he otherwise would not obtain. As well as this, Kaveh is seen to be considered part of Alhaitham’s way of life that he wants to protect. In line with Stirner’s egoism, it follows that as Alhaitham enjoys Kaveh, as in, ‘owns’ the contentment Kaveh elicits, he therefore is affected by Kaveh’s self-inflicted grievances. Therefore, Alhaitham sees Kaveh’s altruism at the expense of his own wellbeing as something “harmful” to be dealt with, as this not only causes Kaveh inward misery, but also detriments Kaveh finding his “true self” (Alhaitham Character Story 3), which the egoist pursues above all else.

#i realised i hadn't actually discussed their philosophies in a post so here's an snippet from The Essay #kaveh's altruism is brushed over here but i didn't want this post getting too expansive oops #since their differences are the basis of the essay it's hard to filter that down into one post?#basically i'm aware that this reads as incomplete but i promise there is more where this came from!!!#also im reading that line: the two cannot reach a consensus even to this day #and im going insane because isn't that the resolution of their conflict? to find middle ground?#gee i wonder if that line is thematically crucial to their characters #also kaveh reads page 185 of the unique and its property and fights off a blush before denying everything #can they talk. please. im sick of them #the essay is coming along btw!!! thank you for all your thoughts and encouragement!!#haikaveh #alhaitham #kaveh #kavetham #haikaveh meta #genshin meta

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thetechnicolorphase · 4 months

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silly doggy save me

#my art #fanart #fetch with ruff ruffman #fwrr #ruff ruffman #pbs kids #hi guys! i have a debilitating illness and it’s called being obsessed with the funny dog show #ive been fixating on it on and off for like um. 3 years now. but this last month has been like a hurricane that swept through my head #now its all i can think about. oops!#i have a lot of art but i prob wont post most of it sorry </3 the world isnt ready for my ideas #maybe once i finish rewatching the show i will post some things #sorry for typing so much in the tags also . im writing a whole essay here whoops

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waiting-down-the-hall-for-me · 4 months

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Ok so I know everyone’s talking about the choice to use ‘Logical’ by Olivia Rodrigo for Sally Jackson but it actually fits so well:

First the word logic is derived from Ancient Greek

Fell for you like water/ now the currents stronger- He’s literally Poseidon, god of sea (or water)

I couldn’t get out if I tried- she’s already in too deep because she had a child with him

I’m the love of your life- Poseidon’s immortal, he doesn’t have a life per se, and she knows all the myths, she knows he’s had so many affairs and will continue to do it

'Cause if rain don't pour and sun don't shine- believing in the Greeks means that rain doesn’t pour because Zeus is the one controlling it and the sun doesn’t actually shine, it’s Apollo or Helios, so everything she’s believed in up til then is wrong

Changing you is possible- even Hermes said it the gods are stuck in their ways, changing something that has stayed the same for millennia is really hard, she knows deep down she can’t

You built a giant castle, With walls so high I couldn't see- he has a castle under the sea, and unless he helped her get down there she physically couldn’t see him, he technically held the power

The way it all unraveled- I’m pretty sure Sally didn’t know about the Big Three Pact or she wouldn’t have had kids with Poseidon in the first place, she had no clue and he never told her

I'm sure that girl is really your friend- again Sally knows the stories, she knows what he’s like and as much as he loved her in the moment he literally had a wife at the same time

I know I'm half responsible, And that makes me feel horrible- it’s about Percy saying he’s a troubled child, and she knew he wasn’t but she couldn’t tell him til he was older because then the monsters would find him

I know I could've stopped it all, why didn't I stop it all?- she blames herself just as much as she blames Poseidon for the trouble Percy would have to go through, she should’ve stopped as soon as she knew he was a god

And bonus ‘I’m reading in to this too much’ point:

Olivia repeats logical three times, but on the third she repeats the ‘love is never logical’- Poseidon is part of the big three, and also what cabin is Percy? Number three

#thank you for coming to my ted talk #oops I accidentally wrote an essay #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #sally jackson #olivia rodrigo #logical

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shadow-the-crow · 16 days

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I think i finally understand how the Distortion works. I mean, i don’t think it’s possible to ever fully understand it, and i don’t know the whole picture yet because i don’t know what Helen will be like, but i feel like i’ve just been granted a glimpse at the lovecraftian (as in ineffable) thing that is this being.

It’s not a person and a creature fighting inside one mind. There’s no Michael clawing himself to the surface to express his emotions and get his revenge.

Michael Shelley is dead. The Distortion became Michael. It sounds so simple, yet a least in my opinion it’s hard to fully understand.

I think what provides the best metaphor is a small thing the Distortion says after becoming Helen: "without a proper mind." The Distortion does not have its own mind. It’s only a what, but in order to really exist in this reality, it needs a who. It needs a body, but also a mind.

So if i understand this right, it’s like this: Michael Shelley is dead. His conciousness is not there anymore. And the Distortion got forced into that mind, an empty mind of a dead person. This doesn’t make it human, it’s still able to understand the impossible, it’s still the thing that was created to scare and kill. But in the mind it’s living in… the previous owner’s furniture is still there. It gets the dead person’s memories. It becomes Michael, in the sense that it has to be someone. Its existence got tied to being Michael, although Michael Shelley is dead.

When Michael got "emotional", that wasn’t Michael Shelley coming through. It was the Distortion grappling with the side effects of being someone - of living in a mind with all the memories and the human emotions that a human mind can’t fully turn off, even when the thing inhabiting it isn’t human at all.

The Distortion was Michael in the sense that it was thinking with Michael Shelley’s mind. When it became Helen, its consciousness, its being stayed the same, but it needed to adapt to this new mind. It could see clearer now, realizing that the windows of the previous house had been dirty, realizing that the wirings of the previous mind had driven it to do something that it actually didn’t want to do. The throat of the Spiral itself getting caught in the spiralling of its own, borrowed mind.

#here comes the first michael essay #this is only the start #i've still got so many more thoughts #i hope this makes sense #idk why but i think i get how the distortion feels #being forced to be someone who isn't you at all #like - it doesn't make sense but i get it??#okay i haven't watched doctor who but maybe it's kinda like being the doctor?#you kinda change personality and become someone else but your true being stays the same?#(as if anyone of us knew what it's like being the doctor any more than we know what it's like being the distortion lol)#tma #michael distortion #tma the distortion #helen distortion #the magnus archives #tma podcast #tma spoilers #tma thoughts #mag 101 #another twist #michael shelley #i just realized i've probably spelled michael wrong in the tags before oops (i know how it's spelled but “micheal” keeps popping up so...)#you know what i'm gonna put the wrong version too for reach #micheal distortion

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andhumanslovedstories · 7 months

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hello this is kind of heavy and no pressure at all to answer. and apologies because im sure you must have answered this before. but do you go through like a pain management flow chart for your patients and if so what are some of the steps? my dad is having some medical issues and i want to be able to help him manage his pain as much as i can. thank you and enjoy wasteland!

I work in a hospital setting so my pain management care plan is part of an interdisciplinary team in that setting. It's relatively easy for me to get, say, IV pain meds for a patient with extreme breakthrough pain. I don't know how well my approach would translate outside of that setting, I'm not palliative care trained, and I don't personally deal with chronic or acute pain (which is why I'm answering this publicly so other people can chime in), but in broad strokes:

First: Define pain. What type of pain is it? Muscle pain? Indigestion? Neuropathy? Surgical site? Stiffness from lack of movement? Is part of the pain also the fear of the pain? Sometimes when pain has been bad for a long time, or even has been bad in a short-term but very notable way, the idea of hurting that bad again is traumatizing. That fear of pain can, unfortunately, make you focus more on the pain you're feeling because now it's not just the physical sensation of pain, it's also the psychological impact of it.

Then, how does the pain affect you? Is it stopping you from sleeping? Is it stopping you from eating? Is it making you short-tempered or depressed? Does it make it difficult to focus on things? Does it make you nauseated? Anxious? Isolated? Do you feel like you need to hide it from those who care about you?

Everything pain is and affects is a place where you can intervene. Some of these interventions will be very small and would, if they were the only intervention, feel completely inadequate. Pain relief is rarely "you do one thing and you're done." You're addressing pain on multiple fronts, and sometimes that doesn't mean your focus isn't just the reduction of pain but the restoration of what pain has taken away. It's possible the worst part of pain for you isn't the pain itself but, for example, the immobility it causes. Are there different ways you can learn to move? Can you get a grabber? Can you get a shower chair? Can you find physical therapy exercises that help you regain strength or stop you from deconditioning to the degree you're able? What mobility aids might restore movement to you?

And if returning mobility is not possible at this time or ever, how can you modify your environment to support you? Can you figure out what bothers you the most about that immobility and mitigate that? If it's annoying that not being able to leave bed makes you bored, what can be within arm's reach? If it's frustrating that being too painful to move means you feel isolated from other people, can you make wherever you are more central? If pain makes having your bed on the second floor unfeasible, can you move your bed to the first floor? How can you adapt the environment around you?

I'd encourage movement too, to the degree it is possible. Being in the same position HURTS. If it feels good to stretch but you can't do it by yourself, can someone help you with range of motion? (You can look up "passive range of motion" to get an idea of how to do that.) This doesn't need to be exercising, just exploring the joy of moving your body. Related to movement is physical touch. I love lotions and medicated creams for pain patients because you can turn them into massages. Just be careful with pressure and be open about what hurts and what feels good. At the most gentle end of the spectrum is something called the M Technique which isn't even massage, it's like guided gentle touch. Give the body something else to feel.

Different medications work better with different types of pain. This part is hard to talk about in general because of the specificity of some pain med regiments. Tylenol is great, but be cautious with how much you are taking (acetaminophen overdoses are no joke) and remember that there's a point where more tylenol doesn't mean more pain relief. Opioids are great, but they can be very dangerous and aren't well-indicated for a lot of types of chronic pain. Even if opioids work best, I'd encourage you to be working on pain reduction on multiple fronts, as opioids are so controlled, it is easy to lose access to them. If opioids give you enough pain relief to do physical therapy, then make sure to do that physical therapy. Medications are amazing and I love them and I give out PRNs like crazy, but similarly to how I can't just take my depression meds and stop being depressed, pain medication works best in conjunction with other strategies. Those other strategies though can literally be something like "tramadol takes away the pain enough I can focus on something, and what I want to do with that focus is to watch a movie I've been meaning to rewatch for a while now but haven't had the spoons for." Sometimes all you will want to do when you get pain meds is sleep because you can't when you're hurting. Sleep is wonderful; how can you arrange your sleeping place and habits to make sleeping even more of a delight?

And if you find a medication that works, use it consistently. It is always easy to keep pain level than it is to address a pain spike. Don't wait until symptoms are at their worst to address them. Figure out what it feels like when your symptoms are ramping up, and intervene early.

Sometimes medications that aren't explicitly for pain can still help. If anxiety makes pain worse, consider an anxiety medication. If coughing hurts, can you get a numbing spray from your throat to make it less sensitive so you cough less?

I don't know how useful this is to you and your family. Hopefully it's at least something to think about. Think about palliative care (which is about the management of symptoms of illnesses rather than the treatment of illnesses) as not just taking away bad sensations but restoring good ones. You can't always get someone to a place with no pain. But what can you do to enhance life in the presence of that pain? There is a psychological aspect to pain, it's a parasite that drains you and makes you feel like you are nothing but a body that hurts and won't stop hurting. I want to make clear, I'm not saying pain is only in your mind. Bone mets and nerve pain exist whether you're cheerful about it or not. But pain doesn't have to mean suffering, it doesn't have to take away the things that make you you. Address pain through medication and therapies, but also remember that protecting, promoting, and prioritizing the parts of yourself that you most value and give you the most joy will help give your life so much substance that pain can't rob it all. You aren't doing one big thing. You are doing a thousand small things that make life easier, better, more suited to yourself and your abilities, and more aligned with the parts of life that you that give your life meaning.

(And a note in particular for being the family member of someone in pain--ultimately, they are going through this alone. It is their body. What can you make smoother for them? How can you protect their dignity and their privacy without making them feel abandoned or alone? How can you make it so your reaction to their pain is not part of their burden? Like for the six hundred other hypothetical questions in this endless post, the answers will be highly personal and will take time to figure out. Be patient and calm.)

#nursing tag #oops! sorry! it’s an essay with I think no definite answers for you #and also an extrapolation of my in hospital work and my home health work #long post

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giac222 · 3 months

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I think one of the most annoying takes I see about TCOAAL is when someone says Ashley is solely the problem and that Andrew is completely innocent…💀 like did we play the same game?? Ashley and Andrew are the same, they always have been. Andrew just hides it better, but we see his mask slip in Ch. 2.

In a comment section on YouTube I literally saw someone say “Andrew needs to realize that Ashley is a bitch and leave.”… I rolled my eyes 🤦🏻‍♀️ lmao, like alright are we just going to completely ignore everything Andrew did? I’m convinced that person didn’t actually play the game.

I’m going to die on the hill that Ashley and Andrew weren’t born evil. The two of them are a product of their environment, especially Ashley. We see that her parents never cared about her and that her “friends” weren’t actually her friends. I’m sure we’ll see more of this in Ch. 3, I already know it’s going to make me sad ughhh. Ashley’s been treated like shit by everyone around her it seems except for Andrew. Andrew has been the only consistent presence in her life, the only one who’s ever been there for her. The flashback from her birthday was so fkn sad, but Andrew tried his best to make it special for her 😭. When she called him her favorite lemon muffin 🥺 yeah, she loves him downnn.

Ashley also has major self esteem issues which absolutely stem from her childhood. Again, I think we’ll see more of this in Ch. 3. She also has a ton of internalized misogyny, she’s had it since she was a kid. I’m like girl.. why are you like 10 calling other girls hussies? 😂 Seriously though, I believe she picked this behavior up from her mother. I mean where else would she learn those words and behaviors from? It’s very easy for kids to pick up on things. I really need the lore on Mrs.Graves because I don’t think she was born evil either. 🤔 The fact that she was a teen mom of 2 before the age of 18 is crazy. That also means her and Mr.Graves have been together for quite some time.

We know Mrs.Graves overall doesn’t care about either of her children, but it’s fair to say that Andrew was treated somewhat better than Ashley. I bring this up because I’ve heard stories about how some moms are easy on their sons while being very hard on their daughters. Also, I’ve seen someone else bring this up before, but when Andrew declines the olive branch and defends Ashley, Mrs.Graves doesn’t understand why and then she accuses him of sleeping with her. Why did her mind automatically go there? As if he couldn’t love Ashley for any reason other than sex. I think the reason Mrs.Graves said that is because of her own internalized misogyny and is projecting. Basically saying: If a man cares about you and does things for you, it’s obviously because you’re sleeping with him, not because he actually wants to do those things out of love. I could be wrong though, that’s just something I picked up on. So yes, I do believe Ashley got her internalized misogyny from her mother. I think generational trauma is definitely at play here, which is honestly just sad more than anything.

Andrew is everything to Ashley, he really is the center of her world 😭, and he’s the only person who’s shown her any type of love. We know she’s terrified of losing him and will do anything to keep him around. Considering no one else has stuck around in her life, it makes sense that she has serious abandonment issues 😞. Ashley can be abusive and manipulative, but I don’t think she necessarily wants to do that, she does it because she thinks that’s the only way she can keep him in her life… what she doesn’t understand though is that Andrew loves her just as much as she loves him, he would stick by her without any of that, we know this, even though he doesn’t show it as much. In ch. 3, I’m sure we’ll finally see him open up more and give her the affection and reassurance she needs. We see a glimpse of this in the questionable burial route when they’re on the bridge. In my opinion, I don’t see how people can call the questionable route the “bad” ending when both of them look the happiest, especially Andrew. I don’t think I’ve seen Andrew that happy at any other point in the game. 💀 he was fr in his element there.

Some people may not want to admit this, but Ashley is a victim as well. That’s why it’s frustrating to see people with the take that Ashley is purely evil and that Andrew is an angel who was manipulated to do everything he’s done. They’re both flawed individuals, but their upbringing was awful and the world around them is awful too. They live in a dystopian society. How they ended up was inevitable, and I’m not excusing their behavior, but they were failed by their parents and had 0 parental guidance. I mean my god, to make things even worse, their own parents sold them to organ harvesters and they were left to starve locked up in an apartment for months with no one else but each other. If they didn’t do what they did, they would have died. 🤷🏻‍♀️ They originally didn’t plan to sacrifice their parents either, they wanted to rob them and leave, but their mother came home and it screwed up their plans. Their mother absolutely would have snitched on them if they didn’t take action. We also know now that people are looking for them, hence the hitman. They literally have no choice but to be on the run. Their situation and actions aren’t black and white.

This turned into a very long post, sorry if it’s messy haha. I just wanted to get my thoughts out there because some of the takes I’ve seen on this game are horrendous. 💀 Thanks for reading if you did. ❤️

#tcoaal #the coffin of andy and leyley #nemlei #kit9 #ashley graves #andrew graves #andrew x ashley #andy graves #leyley graves #andy x leyley #gravecest #coffincest #mini essay #didn’t expect this to be so long oops

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kjpurplepineapple · 1 year

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Been thinking about this LU update a lot, and I see a lot of people talking about how everyone seems to be talking about Wind and Legend and how those two had the cutest expressions.

But can we just take a moment to appreciate the real MVP right here.

This. This is the face of a man who's proud to see that all his hard work paid off and his efforts weren't in vain. Twilight is alive. His friend is alive because of his healing. He finally feels like he accomplished something.

And for a character who's self worth is literally through the floor... That's huge, even if he's in the background and trying not to show it. Twilight is alive and everyone is happy, and Hyrule actually did something.

#linked universe #lu hyrule #started as a shitpost and tuned unto a mini essay oops #Seriously my boy is a little underappreciated imo #by himself too. not a hero my ass

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frenchfry99 · 4 months

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Waitttt....you said Lilly has a *honkable nose???*

.....

*Fnaf nose honk insert*

Lilly does the fnaf nose honk canon ‼️🎉

She's inviting you to join the clownery!

Do you accept the offer??

Bonus Lilly with a couple of her many friends! (lil one befriends anyone in sight)

Haven't drawn my Home design in ages,, he's such a silly fellow (as much as a house can be silly and fellow lol)

#didn't post here for ages oops-#looking at the calendar- it's winter already?? wishing you all to spend the holidays well!#probs gonna try to post some stuff during my winter break #fun fact the first two scribbles here are from like July-#funny how I haven't changed Lilly's design even a bit since then (though now I forget to draw her whiskers 💔💔)#because I love to change my characters looks like a bajillion times before showing them #maybe that's why most of them are still in drafts #talking about planned ocs- Barnaby reminds me of Lilly's parents a lot- perhaps I should draw them some time #funny big cats..#welcome home #welcome home oc #welcome home puppet show #original character #lilly silly wh #lilly silly #barnaby b beagle #welcome home fanart #oc #oh and home my beloved old man! tho in my ver he's more of a creature?? abstract being??#heehoo I love writing a whole essay in tags #the silly siblings wh

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bleue-flora · 21 days

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Ya know, it's occurred to me from watching the way c!Dream talks about c!Tommy being trapped in there with him. He sounds not just glad to have company, but also like optimistic, if that makes sense. Like the "We have tons of time to bond," [46:17], "You're stuck in here with me, whether you like it or not. Okay? Whether you like it or not you're in here with me for a while. We're gonna talk. We're gonna have lots of fun. We’re gonna have lots of fun. Remember–remember when we had fun together, c!Tommy? Remember when we had fun together?–” [46:45], and the "I've changed. I’ve changed. I’ve changed–" [47:19]. He doesn’t say it in a malicious, threatening way, which certainly would be expected of him. I mean, the person who imprisoned you is now imprisoned with you, as the big bad guy that seems like some torture opportunity to me (it is the torture box after all lol ;D), but that’s not what he’s suggesting. No, he sounds adamant about change, about bonding, about talking things through. And given that the TNT Ranboo sets off to get c!Tommy trapped was a part of c!Dream’s plan, it’s very interesting that that would be his response. In fact, it’s almost as if he trapped c!Tommy in order to force them to reconcile, which very much aligns with a theory I’ve actually had for a while - what if the plan to put himself in the prison was about restoring his image.

He was renowned as the villain and everyone was after him and anyone associated with him. They all wanted his head, either because of fear or to be seen as some powerful hero who slayed the big monster. Even in the time of peace, they were plotting to kill him. All while he really just wanted peace and friendship, but he can’t exactly have that when everyone hates him and wants to kill him. Sure, he could seclude himself like Techno, but he didn’t want that. He wanted to be back in the fold.

And he doesn’t want to die, but clearly, they were never going to be satisfied until they destroy him. So, he lets them, and he forms a plan for him to be redeemed in the eyes of the server. He makes a prison so they can defeat him and he gets to live. And he makes the conditions horrible so they a) don’t suspect it was his plan and b) so they feel satisfied with his punishment. He makes it super secure so a) people can’t just get in to kill him, b) so they won’t suspect he’s there willingly (he’s very powerful after all), and everyone can feel safe from him. But he implements an extensive visitor system ("I just don’t want to ever be alone.") so now people can feel safe enough to visit him, and without weapons being involved, work through their issues. The idea being that everyone can come talk to him (which they were too scared or angry to do before) and see how he’s not so scary after all. So, that they then can ultimately release him and he can be a part of society again, now that he’s changed. The prison than was a way to de-villainize himself, so he was no longer the enemy.

Meaning, his favor with c!Techno was a backup plan, and that’s why he didn’t set up a system to get the message to c!Techno sooner, he planned on being let out. He just didn’t plan for things to go so wrong and for people to be so cold…

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nyxofdemons · 7 months

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this was going to be like a mile long essay but i just realized the most concise way to say it is that "it feels like a retcon that blitz has been so resentful and hostile towards fizz all this time since he was supposed to feel guilty" is simply not a good criticism when we have been shown, time and time again, that blitz's number one defense mechanism when he feels guilty or judged or attacked is to lash out, to deflect and ignore all his responsibility, and to shift the blame to someone else. that's like. his defining character flaw

#- and that's WHY it was such a major THING for his arc!! that he apologized to fizz and accepted responsibility for what he did!!!#like. the fact that he said; EXPLICITLY; the words 'you're right; it was all my fault; i should have done better; i am so sorry' IS #SO BIG!!!! LIKE THAT IS SUCH A HUGE THING FOR HIM!!!!!#mine #helluva boss #blitzo helluva boss #helluva boss blitzo #blitz #e: oops #analysis #also its entirely reasonable that blitz would have gone spiraling down the thought process that maybe fizz always hated him if he could #blame him so easily when fizz was probably the one blitz was MOST counting on to hear him out #and the fact that fizz went on and got SUPER famous and successful after he was no longer performing with blitz - who i'm SURE had #only been given more and more shit for not being as good as fizz as they got older (by his dad and by himself) - he probably assumed fizz #blamed him for that too - holding fizz back with his own poor performance #which is why his insults towards fizz had always been 'overrated sellout' and insisting he slept his way to the top with ozzie.#he'd tear down fizz's quality as a performer because BLITZ feels insecure about his OWN quality as a performer #these tags have gotten so fucking long but that's the gist of the essay i was gonna write about this fjfdjjfghf #MEDIA ANALYSIS IS MY PASSION

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c0zyrainfall · 6 months

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I was thinking about it, and I started wondering what exactly is so appealing about damianya.

Twiyor is equally well written, I think, but I actually prefer the former (though I love both!). That's just because of preference and my appreciation for enemies to lovers. HOWEVER I have decided to draft up an analysis pinpointing why damianya is so enticing, because I write my own original material, and I think you can gain a lot of valuable insight by reverse engineering good writing.

First of all: What is the definition of a good romantic relationship?

I will use the following guidelines:

1) Based off of genuine friendship

2) Both are willing to sacrifice for the other and

3) Both parties make the other a better person.

The first guideline I outlined is big here. Because they are kids, they obviously should not be in a full on romantic relationship now. As a matter of fact, they will probably be waiting AT LEAST eight years. At least.

This means they have eight years to develop a true and wholesome friendship. A friendship with no romantic ulterior motives. They just get to enjoy being kids and growing up with one another. Because of this, they will see each other's high AND low points, rather than viewing the other with rose tinted lenses. Yes, maybe one of them (cough Damian) gets butterflies and feels flustered every time they see the other. But for now, it is very innocent and immature, a childish crush. By framing the goal for this relationship as FRIENDSHIP rather than ROMANCE, the two are able to develop a deeper understanding and a more complete picture of each other before they take anything to the next level.

Does the second point even need to be addressed? Anya is willing to take a tonitrus bolt for him. She is willing to stand up for him (well, technically for the "mission" but we'll get to that later). Damian is willing to take a hit for her, whether it be a dodgeball or a literal bomb. He gives her his share of the macaron (which he believes could help him with his intelligence.) He spends time he could be using to study to locate the finest teacakes in the world so he can give them to her.

Now to the third point.

When we first meet Damian, we don't like him. He is a classist jerk. So karma hits him (literally) in the form of Cupid's arrow. By developing a crush on Anya, he is learning that he should not treat others differently because they have less money. He becomes a better person by learning that "commoners" are the same as all the rich students at Eden.

Side tangent: while I relate more to Damian academic wise, aka pushing myself probably too far to get good grades, I'm sure we can all personally relate to Anya. She tries a lot of things. She fails at almost all of them. Thus, by seeing someone who is academically accomplished and rich be infatuated with her just for being herself, we start to realize that those things don't matter as much as we sometimes feel. Therefore, we want Damian to like her, because it is sweet. It is sweet that someone who places value on things like high academics is able to see past that and appreciate someone else for different good qualities, rather than the ones society deems most important. ~

When Anya first meets Damian, we cannot fault her for disliking him. He is rude to her because she is in a lower social class than him. She is rude to him because he is mean to her. This is perfectly reasonable. In the beginning, it would not make her a better person to be friends with him; as a matter of fact, avoiding him would probably be the high road in this situation. If I were her, I would not have wanted to be friends with him at all.

Side tangent 2:

If you like damianya, you are probably fond of Anya. And of Damian. This is true for me. He's my favorite sxf character. The reason WHY we are fond of him is because we know his backstory. We know he is actually a sweet little guy who just wants to be loved. So we also want him to succeed in his friendship with Anya.

However, though she may have picked up bits and pieces through her mind reading, Anya does not know this. And even if she did, she likely wouldn't understand the levity of it. She's only 4 or 5. ~

Damian and Anya have developed since they first met. They ARE friends (or close to it, anyways). So while at first it wouldn't have made Anya a better person to genuinely care about Damian, now it would.

Because we know Damian and care about him, we also want Anya to care about him. We want her to understand why he acts the way he does. We want her to understand that he actually cares about her.

While Damian is terrible at proving he cares through his words, he is really good at SHOWING her. If she understands he has a different method for showing care, Anya grows. She is able to develop a greater understanding of other people, rather than shaping the world through her own perspective. Framing Damian as the mission makes a lot of sense. She wants her parents to stay together and not get rid of her, and she wants world peace. Of course Anya is not bad for wanting these things. But she will be BETTER when she learns to see things from Damian's pov. She will see the world is not all black and white. She will see that he is not just a mission, and that he is actually as important to her as Yor is to Twilight.

So, conclusively, those are some reasons Damianya is a well written and popular ship. I could also go into detail about how it subverts expectations, likely has future plot relevance (in relation to the story as a whole rather than just a side plot), and is a generally unique and well executed idea. However, for now, I'll leave it at this. I tried to nail down the psychology of what makes it appealing to us, but if anyone has further insights, please feel free to let me know :) Hope you all have a great day

#if you read this whole thing you are a champion #me writing a whole on essay about this #instead of doing hw oops #guess I'll go do that now...#anyways this is my coping mechanism since #we probably have to wait another month or two for the next damianya chapter #spy x family #spy family #spy x family anya #anya forger #damianya #spy x family spoilers #spy x family manga #damian desmond

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