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skellebonez · 3 years

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Hmmm how about MK and Monkie King with number 1 and number 45

I wanted to write a follow up to a certain fill that got some wonderful art recently too! But then the finale happened and now I made it depressing, sorry. Spoilers for... everything as this is set 3 days after the final episode. This also plays around with the “Sun Wukong is still super immortal and powerful but...” and other theories. (second prompt line is only used as inspiration in fill)

Do not give me that look./ You may technically be an adult, but you’re still my child.

The moment MK's curse was lifted and he was re-aged from 4 years old to adult Wukong acted like nothing had happened at all. No understanding conversations about how his powers could hurt him, no cooking together, no video games, and no accidental couch naps. It was as if the entire day had been undone to the sands of time.

But MK remembered and when the literal next day Wukong announced he was going on vacation... let's just say he was not happy in the slightest. He had tried to voice his objections, citing the Spider Queen as a prime example for why they should be worried, but the immortal monkey just flashed him dual thumbs up with a “Monkey King Out!” and flashed off somewhere MK couldn’t follow.

And now he was back and while MK had been more than happy to get going at first, to push everything that happened deep down inside him and ignore it for as long as possible (why was he doing that, he needed to stop doing that, look where that got them he was a mistake a bad choice as a successor and now he’s barely a successor at all) there was only so long he could go before it became clear there was more wrong than what Sun Wukong was telling him.

There was more wrong with Sun Wukong himself that he refused to admit.

He tried to hide it as well as he could. Despite the heat outside and the fur covering his body he still wore full body clothing. Hiding away the gashes and healing scars that riddled his form now. There was a nick in his eyebrow that had never gone away, and when MK watched closely he could see his mentor sometimes place his hand too far to the left when grabbing something. He walked with a slight limp, though that had improved over the last few days.

And he was quiet. Yes, when someone was addressing him he was “yeah totally, we got this fam, onward westward!”, but when MK caught him alone... especially outside on the deck of the drone, watching the horizon, he was more quiet and still than the Monkie Kid had ever seen him before.

Or maybe he was always like this and now Wukong was too hurt or distracted enough or just didn’t care anymore that MK was finally seeing him.

It was hard to tell with how distant he had been the last three days. Distant in the same way the day after the curse was lifted, but quieter.

“We need to talk,” He said from behind his mentor, watching as Wukong’s tail jumped only a little. Maybe that was just surprise at the words themselves. “Alone. Please.”

He expected Wukong to brush him off, to say “aw bud, can’t it wait? look at the sunset!” despite the sun having set so far they barely had any light left or something else. But instead he straightened up (MK heard the slight crack of his back again, much softer than when he had first heard it after their crash landing, and he wondered how much his back had healed from whatever injury it had) and turned to his student with an odd expression. Somewhat soft and fond and somewhat worried and resigned. Like this was more than just 3 days coming (and it was).

“Let’s... get something to eat first, alright?”

MK didn’t mention that they had eaten just over an hour ago.

They sat in the kitchen of the drone, alone under the dimmed lights with cups of tea and sliced fruit between them (mostly for Wukong). Neither had said anything as they prepared the small snack, and neither said anything as they sat down and took sips of their tea.

MK had made it slightly too strong.

“What did you want to ask first?” Wukong started off, picking up a peach slice and biting into it carefully. Slowly. This was something else that was noticed. Before when eating the Monkey King would just shove whatever he was eating in his mouth and MK wasn't certain he tasted it. But now it was like he was trying to make every meal last as long as possible. “There’s... a lot. I can tell.”

“We spent an entire day together and then you left without telling me anything,” MK said firmly, gripping the tea cup in his hands. He squeezed harder, just to see what would happen. It should have shattered... it didn’t. “Why didn’t you just... say something?”

“... I thought I was protecting you,” Wukong admitted honestly, taking another bite of peach. “And the city, the others... That if I acted distant you wouldn’t wonder where I went a-”

“Wouldn’t wonder wh- no!” MK interrupted, gritting his teeth. “No, Monkey K- Wukong.” The change in how MK addressed him made Wukong jolt, looking at him with wide eyes. He had never called him by his name before now. “We spent an entire day together. You took care of me, helped me when my powers went haywire, helped me make food! You never treated me like that before! You treated me like... Like I was...”

“My kid,” Wukong finished for him, now looking down into his tea cup. “MK... You’re an adult, I know that, but somewhere down the line I started to think of you as... I didn’t know till then I guess, and that terrified me. The idea of you getting hurt that day was the only thing that compared to admitting I got attached to you as more than just my student.”

Had this revelation come sooner MK might have been more surprised. More disbelieving. But after that day and everything that happened once the curse was gone...

“... you have a funny way of showing it,” MK snapped without thinking, eyes widening and jolting upright when he realized what he had said. “I-”

“Don’t,” Wukong said with a shake of his head, sipping his tea with a sigh. “You deserve to be angry with me. I talked to, uh... Pigsy? Sandy too. Tang.... Mei. Your boss in particular laid into me pretty hard after the excitement died down... Don’t know how I went 1000 years without knowing what a ‘lie by omission’ was.”

“... you abandoned me.”

“Yes... I didn’t mean it that way, but that doesn’t change that I did.”

“You didn’t trust me.”

“NO.” Wukong said firmly, voice raised for the first time in days. MK glowered at him. “No, that is one thing I will not back down on. Yes, I lied to you and left you behind and that was a mistake I will need to make up for over a long time, but it wasn’t because I didn’t trust you. I trusted you to take care of yourself, to teach yourself the lessons I left behind, and take care of the city. And you did! You did so much better than I even hoped for, and I hoped so badly that you would do as well as you did! I didn’t leave you there because I didn’t trust you, I left you there because I did... and because I thought I had to do everything myself...” He sighed, running a hand down his face. “I’ve been alone so long... I forgot I could do things with help on my end, I guess...”

“If... If Lady Bone Demon hadn’t finished what she was doing...?”

“Had the Lady Bone Demon not been working faster than I thought she was I would have come back with nothing less than even more trust in you as my successor.”

“... am I even still your successor without...?” MK trailed off, trying to keep his voice level. The tea cup still held strong.

“Yes,” Wukong assured, reaching out to put a hand on MK’s shoulder. MK noticed how he almost missed and corrected his hand. “The staff and my powers alone didn’t make you my successor. I picked you before those, remember? You’re still the Monkie Kid, MK. Nothing is going to change that for me.”

The young man went quiet for a moment, taking a shaky breath. He wanted to ask why he was chosen, what made him so special... but there would be time for that in the future. For now he had gotten at least some of his questions answered. But there was something much more pressing to touch on.

“,,, you’ve been lying to all of us,” he accused suddenly, reaching up and grabbing the wrist of Wukong’s hand on his shoulder before he could pull back. He looked his mentor in the face, watching as Wukong’s eyes widened in realization and horror. “Do not give me that look. Stop... please, stop lying. I’m not stupid, I can see you’re still hurt bad. You’re supposed to be invincible but you came back hurt and... and almost nothing can hurt you!”

Wukong didn’t meet MK’s gaze, looking down at their snack as he breathed heavily and shakily. He knew he was caught, that much was obvious.

“Please... talk to me, for once. I know I do the same thing, I lied to everyone else by not telling them about LBD or the calabash or Macaque coming back-” Wukong tensed at that, an odd sound escaping his throat. “-and look where it got us. We both need to talk. To everyone else. To each other.”

Wukong’s arm was shaking where MK held it, but he didn’t try to pull it back. Not until MK let it go. He sat back down, looking at the table like it held all the secrets of the universe before bringing his hand up to cover his eye. The one with the nicked eyebrow.

“Bud...” Wukong started, biting his lip. There was something wrong in his tone. “I... you were going to find out eventually. I can’t keep this up forever, not like Macaque can.” MK tensed at the mention of the other immortal monkey, watching as Wukong did not move his hand. “This takes a lot of focus. And... with my invincibility partly gone-”

“What?” MK asked, so soft he thought Wukong hadn’t heard him.

“... You didn’t get my powers from the staff, MK,” Wukong said. “And they don’t just duplicate. That’s not how they work. From day one I have been... siphoning my powers to you. Bit by bit. As you got better at controlling them I would give you more until I felt I didn’t need them myself anymore. When I locked away your invincibility I just undid what I had given you and slowed down the transfer... you’d been half invincible for weeks.”

“No...” MK started, slowly realizing what Wukong was implying. “No, no you’re lying again! This is a terrible, horrible prank!” Despite wanting to be quiet before MK found himself yelling. “Say you’re still lying!”

“No,” Wukong shook his head, looking down at the scar on his arm that was now visible as his sleeve had slipped down. “Most of this will probably heal eventually, except maybe one thing, and I’m still immortal! There’s no undoing that no matter what I do. I’m not dying any time soon. But my transformations? Cloning? My cloud...” He trailed off at that, breaking in a shaky breath. “You didn’t even get to use that... Lady Bone Demon took all of it when she took it from you. I still have some powers, some of my transformations and hair stuff and some invincibility... but I’m not the same overpowered Monkey King you met when you freed DBK...”

And as he trailed off, Wukong lowered his hand. Something flickered, something familiar. Too familiar. Reminiscent of Macaque’s shadows but brighter. And after there was something else reminiscent. In reverse.

MK had only seen it for a split second, when all of Macaque’s glamor magic had dropped. The milky white right eye and the scar over it that was left behind from his battle with Wukong 500 years ago.

And now Wukong looked at him with a similarly white left eye, a similar scar that wasn’t just a nicked eyebrow running down his face.

It makes sense in retrospect, much more. MK supposed that when you lose an eye you lose depth perception and it takes a while to get used to judging where things are.

“... what happened before you came in to save me?” MK asked quietly, watching as more of the glamor fell with a curse from Wukong. There was another nick on his cheek that was still healing, a piece of one of his ears had been ripped off too. No doubt there were more injuries under his clothes that Wukong hadn’t let anyone see.

“She has Macaque under her control,” Wukong said plainly, groaning as he held his head. “Damn, that... letting that down...” He groaned again and before MK could realize what was happening Wukong’s eyes rolled back into his head and he slipped from his chair to the floor.

“WUKONG!” MK shot up, rushing over to his side and yelling over his shoulder in the hopes someone would hear. “Pigsy! D-DADSY! Help, SOMETHING’S WRONG!”

When Pigsy rushed in with the others in tow Wukong hadn't regained consciousness.

#and i shall leave it there because I am clearly evil #monkie kid #lego monkie kid #gen fic #monkey king #sun wukong #mk #qi xiaotian #lmk spoilers #i have too may theories and this is just one #prompt fill

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random-mha-thoughts · 4 years

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Sleepless (LoV x Reader)

Pairing: League of Villains x Reader, platonic relationship

Shigaraki, Toga, Twice, Kurogiri, Dabi x reader

@riarora messaged me with the request: "So I was thinking platonic LOV x child reader (You can make them 18 if you're more comfortable, but I was thinking more like 14-15)The reader (I'll refer to them as she/her, but you can make it gender neutral) has really bad insomnia so every night, she would be pacing around, doing anything and everything to make sure no dark thoughts take over. Usually, none of the LOV would bat an eye, but considering the fact that she's a child, they feel sympathy, so they indirectly try to get her to fall asleep. Like, sending her on extra missions (always with protection of course) or changing her normal tea with sleeping tea, or maybe just straight up telling her to sleep."

Genre: Comfort

Word Count: 2,291

Tags: @yuki-osaki @liviitehe @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog

a/n: Thanks for the request sweetie! I hope you like it~

Wrote this while listening to a Shinsou playlist on Spotify and it was pretty chill to listen to, if y’all want the link you can comment or dm me and I’ll send it. Something different, but I like how it turned out. It's twice as long as I thought it would end up being, but I think it fits. It's a comfort story that I hope you guys will read even if you don't normally read stuff for the villains. I really like it, I hope you guys read it if you need some comforting. Enjoy~

Like a lot of people, I don't have the nicest thoughts. Most nights, I'm trying everything to block them out and find the sweet release of sleep, whether it's trying to consciously think of other things to block them out, escaping out of my sheets to pace or run in place inside this small room I was given, or getting up to get a snack. Unsurprisingly, none of it works. The rest of the League constantly tease me about my dark circles making me look more villainous all I do is smile, because at least it means I'm part of something now. I would ask them to get me something to busy myself, like a sketch book or a notebook to keep me busy at night, but they aren't my parents; they have no obligation to take care of me and they've already give me a roof over my head and a bed to sleep in.

Little by little, the perceived barrier between us broke down before I realized it.

It started when I took one of my late night trips to the kitchen only to see the light on already. Toga's crooked but innocent smile beams up at me as she twirls a knife in her hand, leaning against the counter. "You're up too, hmm~? Wanna take a trip with me?"

We ended up shrugging on our jackets and masks, walking into the dark, brisk night to the nearest grocery store. "You waited until 2 AM to get pomegranates?" I raised an eyebrow at her zipping straight to the produce section of the market.

"I didn't wanna go alone~" Toga casually responded in her singsongy voice. "A little girl like me shouldn't be out alone at night. Besides, late night shopping in a practically empty supermarket is the best time to go. It's super creepy!" She giggles, filling a plastic bag with three large fruits.

We returned to our hideout and she asked me to help her de-seed them. I slide in next to her, taking the knife out of her hand. Not like I had anything better to do. What was I gonna do, sleep? Sure, okay.

She sliced the fruits in half and held her hands over a large, empty container, using just her hands to push the seeds off the bitter white core, humming to herself. "Are you sure there isn't a more...strategic way to do this?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at the mess she was making of her hands.

Toga just giggled and held my stare with her cat-like yellow eyes. "When it gets all over your fingers, it kind of looks like blood doesn't it?" She shivered in ecstasy as she licked the scarlet juice running down her hands and the knife she cut them with. "Mmm, so sweet."

While I continued, trying to avail to be as clean as possible, taking sips of the tea she made for us while we work. I chanced a few tastes myself, chuckling at my own hands. "You're right, it looks like we've commit murder."

"Right?" she chirped with the widest grin, "Isn't it fun?"

I made a better point to get more juice on my fingers before curling my fingers grossly towards her. "I want your heart, Toga. Give it to me!" I growled.

She giggled and held one of my wrists so she can lick some of the juice off. "Too bad you can't have it."

After we finished gathering the seeds into the bowl, we sat on the couch, munching on them by the handful and finishing our drinks. My eyelids kept drooping as I drank my tea.

"We should go on adventures more often," Toga purred as I near the end, taking my cup, laying me down, and covering my body with a blanket before petting my head. Her voice singing, "Sleep well, (Y/n)" was the last thing I heard before drifting off. It was the best night's sleep I'd gotten in a long while.

A few days later, Kurogiri stopped me from heading to bed while the rest went off. "I heard you and Toga up late a few nights ago. Why don't you help me clean up before going up?"

I agreed, mostly because I would be awake with my thoughts anyway. He had me shining his glasses, climbing up a ladder to dust the top shelves of his bar, wiping down the counters, and organizing his liquor.

"Have some of this, child." He set down a cup of tea and saucer on the counter while I was organizing his top shelf liquor, the clock flashing 1:57 AM. "You've been a big help."

I climbed down carefully and stare down at the translucent, peach colored liquid carefully.

He noticed my cautiousness. "How are you adjusting?"

I tilted the cup around, swishing the liquid around before holding it up to my lips. "It's better than where I was before, thank you."

"I'm glad you're settling in and getting along with the rest."

"It's just Toga so far." I sipped a good portion of the hot liquid, easing down my through smooth as the honey I can taste that he added.

"It'll take time for the others to warm up to you. Shigaraki and Dabi especially don't take to strangers that easily, but they'll come around." His cold, portal enclosed hand rested on my head. "We're happy to take you in as our family, (Y/n)."

I smiled at his assurance of me, nodding in gratitude, but still hesitant about feeling that I fit in here.

We talked for a while more until I finished his tea and he sent me off to bed. Though reluctant - I even offered to do more cleaning up to keep myself there - he insisted I leave. I trudge to my room, the exhaustion in my bones and muscles more apparent than usual. I know this old trick; even when I'm fatigued, my thoughts still keep me up. But as I ease under the blanket and close my eyes, I feel myself pulled down into sleep without interference. I started thinking there was something in the tea.

It took a while for Shigaraki to come around, as Kurogiri said. He heard the rustling of me rolling around in bed on his way back from getting a glass of water from the kitchen. "Hey, you still awake?"

I turned over and sat up. "Am I bothering you? I'm sorry-"

"You wanna come play games with me?" It was an unexpected question. He never talked much to me so I figured he wanted to keep his distance.

But I still agreed, ending up in his dark room where only the TV cast its artificial light over us. He pulled up another pillow for me to sit with him, leaning back against the mattress and box-spring stack. He resumed his game, some kind of RPG with amazing art and storytelling. The main character had jet black hair and traveled with three other guys of varying talents and personalities. They seemed to have a great relationship together as they trekked across their virtual world in a fancy car. (1000 brownie points if you know which game i'm referencing)

There was a hilarious part in the game where the crew rode on the backs of these fluffy, yellow birds that were the size of ostriches. "What's the point of this part?" I asked curiously.

Shigaraki beamed at the screen, his chapped lips spreading in joy. "It's just something you always have to do in these games."

My eyes remained glued to the screen. Shigaraki wouldn't ask me if I wanted to play after one time, which I appreciated. I'm not too good at playing games, I prefer watching other people play them from the sidelines. I followed the complicated story line, impressed with how fleshed out the world is, the detail in the art, and the power system interface. If I were better at gaming, I'd understand how amazing it would feel playing it; I was immersed in it even as a spectator.

The game got to a cave-crawling segment. The eased up voice acting, ambient noise, and dimmed lighting made my eyes heavy. I didn't want to fall asleep in Shigaraki's room, but I also knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep if I went back to mine.

"You can sleep if you want. Get comfortable."

Though he didn't particularly use a motherly voice like Kurogiri, I understood he was trying to come off the same way. I ended up laying on my head on my pillow, sprawling onto the floor on my stomach, the noise of the game slowly lulling me off to sleep. In the morning, I would wake to a blanket pulled over my body. It somehow became a weekly occurrence; we wouldn't talk to each other, but the silence was comfortable. It was reassuring that I didn't always need that strange tea to put me to sleep.

Late nights with Twice are probably my favorite. He's like a huge dad, or much older big brother. I connected with him on a more emotional level than the rest. If I found myself in the kitchen rummaging for snacks, he'd come up and pick out a bunch and sit us at the table with some tea.

"I have trouble sleeping too sometimes," he admitted, popping some chips in his mouth. "I was lonely before I found these guys. I had no one but myself, and the many versions of myself weren't the most forgiving on me either."

I stared down at my glass of warmed milk. "So your thoughts were actually told out loud to you all the time?" I whispered softly.

"Yup." He blinked before waving his hands in front of his face wildly. "But that doesn't mean I had it worse than you, that's not what I'm saying at all! Your problems are just as valid and important and-!"

"It's okay, I understand."

He offered a sympathetic lopsided smile. "I know you've been through a lot, kid, and it probably feels like a lot and nothing at the same time. The times when it feels like a lot will hurt, and that's okay. You'll get through it and grow up to deal with it in your own way. And there is a light at the end of the tunnel, believe me. You can't see it now, but it's there. Keep fighting through it." He touched my hand over the glass. "I'm here for you, we're here for you."

I felt like crying, suddenly choked up by the bitter nostalgia of missing my parents. "You'd be a great Dad, Twice." I tried to cover for my tears and unsteady voice by clearing my throat and rubbing my eyes.

He hummed in response. "I've always wanted a kid. Things never ended up that way though."

I found myself finally sobbing at his misfortune piling on top of mine. "That's really shitty actually," I choked out.

He handed me a tissue to wipe my face with. "Let it out, kid. Sometimes it's good to just cry it out."

And I did, until I finally sobbed myself to sleep at the table, and Twice picked up and returned me to my bed, tucking me in like the soft dad he should've been.

Dabi remained the hard nose one, keeping his distance and looking down on me. Like Shigaraki, walked by my room while I was tossing around, but he stood over my bed. "Hey. If you don't go to sleep, I'm putting you to work."

Put me to work he did, sending me out to fetch him snacks, cards, or cigarettes. Once, he decided to join me and we ended up on the roof of our abandoned building after coming back from the convenience store. The stars already dusted the sky as Dabi lit the cigarettes with his blue flames just for fun, watching them disintegrate into ash in front of his eyes. I never knew how to get him to open up, he's too gruff for me to start a conversation with him, so I stuck to being mesmerized by his flames.

"What's on your mind that you can't sleep, kid?" he finally asked, breaking the awkward silence and cutting off his quirk to stare me hard in the eyes.

"N-Nothing." I hated to admit it, but I'm scared of Dabi the most. Both him and Shigaraki can end my life in a fraction of a second, but Dabi overall has the scarier aura. "Just...thinking."

After a few more moments of braving his stare, he looked up. "Yeah, we all do that a lot, don't we? Us damn human can't help but think. It'd be nice if we can pull the cord sometimes, yeah?"

"I guess," I answered carefully.

He studied me again out of the corner of his eye before flickering back up. "Do you ever think that's why none of us survive well alone? We need other people to distract us all the time because then we'd get stuck in our heads, and we all know how dangerous that can be if we're stuck there for too long. It never ends well." He adjusts himself, placing his hands behind his head to rest his neck. "We all got demons, kid. It's what makes us stronger, but you gotta grow from them first. And I guess that's what the rest of us are for, so if you need us, you know what to do."

It was with Dabi that I realized he had a point. I'm not alone anymore and none of the others seem to think of me as a stranger or a stupid little kid they have to be responsible for. I'm a member of this group now, I should rely on them as support, just not in the traditional way.

How I ultimately ended up here doesn't help any of the awful things I tell myself or what happened to me, but being here definitely helps, especially when I'm surrounded by people who subtly share solidarity with for now.

#my hero academia #boku no hero academia #league of villians x reader #dabi #toga himiko #mha twice #kurogiri #shigaraki #request #platonic #gender neutral reader #comfort #league of villains imagine #league of villains scenario #mha x reader #bnha x reader #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfiction

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jacaranda-bloom · 4 years

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Monthly fic rec showcasing some of the fics I’ve read this month, and let me tell, you there have been a lot - partly because I’m reprioritising my reading again and partly because we are being inundated with an avalanche of amazing fics at the moment. So yeah, be prepared for a fairly sizeable list under the cut.

In this instalment, there are fics from @sunflowrsix @kiddleau @metal-eye @flamboyantommo @icanhazzalou @sadaveniren @crinkle-eyed-boo @lululawrence @beau-soleil-louis @homosociallyyours @kingsofeverything @crazyupsetter @laynefaire and @allwaswell16.

Thank you to all the writers for sharing their wonderful talent with us. Please don’t forget to leave kudos and a comment if you enjoy their work. 💜

💜 an entire desert in our hourglass by tofiveohfive

@sunflowrsix Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 19k

# Pre-apocalypse, angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, post break-up, getting back together, anal sex, alcohol.

The world is ending. Harry comes over.

💜 bloodsport by tofiveohfive

@sunflowrsix

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 40k

# Friday Night Lights AU, angst, post break-up, getting back together, underage drinking, anal sex, American football.

“You know how our next game is against the Cardinals, right? You remember how vicious those guys can get. I wanted us to come up with some plays, maybe work on a block from the left—”

Louis stops when he hears a chuckle.

He doesn’t think he’s said anything particularly funny, so he turns to Harry, waiting for an explanation.

“‘S funny, ‘s all.” Harry throws his finished bottle somewhere near the other discarded ones. “This is the first time you’re talking to me in eight months, and it’s still about football.”

💜 Half A Million Strong by kiddle

@kiddleau Part 1 of the Woodstock Series

Harry/Louis | Mature | 51k

# Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Famous Harry, Non-Famous Louis, Historical, 1960′s, Woodstock, Coming of Age, Recreational Drug use.

Louis Tomlinson is a young writer for a relatively new-on-the-scene rock magazine called Rolling Stone. His assignment is to fly across the country to cover the highly anticipated Woodstock Music and Art Festival. Armed with a notebook, audio recorder, and a camera, Louis just needs one big interview.

Harry Styles. A new name in rock music and a future name in rock history. His first album sold tens of thousands and his interviews attract audiences across the country. He has the poetry of Jim Morrison and the stage presence of Mick Jagger. And after seeing him perform at the festival, Louis is willing to jump through hoops to put Harry on the cover of Rolling Stone.

💜 Gather No Moss by kiddle

@kiddleau Part 2 of the Woodstock Series

Harry/Louis | Mature | 50k

# Friends to Lovers, Famous Harry, Non-Famous Louis, Historical, 1960′s, Pining Tour bus, Coming of Age, Recreational Drug use.

Music journalist Louis Tomlinson will do just about anything to get a story he’s passionate about. Including spending a week on tour with the hard-to-manage rockstar-in-the-making Harry Styles. In the late 60s, every long-haired kid thinks they can make it in music, and Louis’ job is to figure out what exactly makes Harry so special. That is if he can get him to put down the bottles and guitars to answer a question truthfully.

💜 Caught By The Sun by metal_eye

@metal-eye Tumblr Fic Post Part 1 of the Caught By The Sun series

Harry/Louis | Mature | 19k

# Cabin AU, Summer Romance, Young Love, Skinny Dipping, First Time, Idiots In Love, Symbolic Thunderstorms, Bonfires.

He came every summer. It wasn’t even a question. Harry and his parents—one step, one real—picked up their lives, packed it into a car, and drove long enough to land at the ends of the earth.

The cabin had been in his family for a hundred years. There was no TV, no phone, no computer, no radio. There were decks of cards and plastic deer and marbles. There were skis and leaves and a treehouse.

And then there was Louis.

Or, Harry and Louis meet every summer at the lake.

💜 Somewhere Where You’re There by metal_eye

@metal-eye Part 2 of the Caught By The Sun series

Harry/Louis | Mature | 4k

# Cabin AU, Timestamp, Nostalgia, Blow Jobs, Boat Sex, Lake Sex.

The greatest luxury, in this new part of their lives, should have been time. It stretched at varied intervals with no attention to what the real world might find convenient. Hours yawned like horses’ mouths, stretching backwards in the effort of seconds. Except that Harry couldn’t help feeling like he’d missed out, somehow. That he needed to hurry. They’d been denied their formative horny years. Something had to give.

A Caught by the Sun timestamp in which they are both lazy and horny, and some things get resolved.

💜 Members Only by kikikryslee

@flamboyantommo Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Mature | 14k

# Gyms, Boxing, Awkward Flirting, Mutual Pining. Locker Room, Semi-Public Sex, Smut.

“Well, I’m gonna go work out now, so…” Harry said, his voice trailing off. Louis nodded. “Yeah, yeah, go ahead. Go get, uh, you know, strong and buff.” What? Louis wanted to die. “Um, thanks?” Harry said. “Um…” Without another word, Harry walked away from the desk. Louis pinched his thigh – hard – hoping that was some terrible, awkward nightmare that he might soon wake up from. Or, the one where Louis works at Harry's new gym and neither one of them knows how to hold a coherent conversation with the other.

💜 I’d Still Dance With You by kikikryslee

@flamboyantommo Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Mature | 57k

# Age Difference, Louis is 28, Harry is 21, Mutual Pining, Angst, Student Harry, Ad Exec Louis, Slow Burn, Smut, Bottom Harry, Top Louis.

💜 Naked and Proud by kiwikero

@icanhazzalou Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 19k

# Farmer Harry, Songwriter Louis, Small Town, Organic Food, Summer Romance, Lust At First Sight, Pining, Smut.

The town itself is tiny, as evidenced by the ten minutes it’s taken Louis to drive the entire thing. There’s not a single recognisable brand in sight—no Tesco or McDonald’s or even a bloody Starbucks. Lining the streets instead are mom and pop stores with names like ‘Jerry’s Burgers’ and ‘The Market Basket’ and…

“'Naked & Proud?'” Louis almost slams on the brakes at the outlandish sign, the name written in a seemingly innocent font, words curved around a large cartoon peach. He can’t help turning into the carpark, easing the car into a spot next to a beat up truck.

He isn’t sure what to make of it. Surely it isn’t a strip joint or sex shop, not with the families and little old ladies going in and out of the establishment. Some kind of nudist hangout, perhaps?

And, oh, God. Did Louis’ mother accidentally send him to live in a nudist colony?

In which Harry runs an organic store, not a nudist colony, and Louis doesn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed.

💜 Paint The Sky With Stars by kiwikero

@icanhazzalou Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Mature | 63k

# Titanic AU, Strangers to Lovers, Happy Ending.

On 10 April 1912, Harry Styles boards the finest ship the world has ever seen. Still grieving the death of their mother, he and his sister are being sent to America to live with a callous uncle who cares more about his business connections than family. Harry prepares himself for a long, disappointing voyage alone in his stateroom.

Louis Tomlinson has borrowed and saved, and finally has enough to purchase a Third Class ticket to America. With all of his belongings in a single ruck sack, he boards the Titanic filled with hope for a brighter future. Never one to sit still, he can’t resist exploring the massive ship, and soon goes sneaking into First Class in a stolen steward’s uniform.

By a twist of fate, Louis finds himself in Harry’s stateroom, entranced by the most attractive man he’s ever laid eyes on. He keeps returning day after day, even if he doesn’t understand what it is about Harry that continues pulling him in. That’s all right; Louis has a week to figure it out, and Harry is plenty willing to help.

Except they don’t have a week. They have four days. Because on 15 April, their entire world will be turned upside down.

Or, the historically accurate Titanic AU with a happy ending.

💜 Just For Tonight (I can be yours) by SadaVeniren

@sadaveniren Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 43k

# ABO, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Prince Harry Styles, Secret Relationship, Arranged Marriage, Mpreg Harry, Smut.

Harry, prince of Cestrescir, has been betrothed to Ludvic, prince of Yorvik, since birth. He'd accepted a loveless marriage as his duty to his country, until an accident threw him in the path of a gentle alpha.

💜 Live A Thousand Lifetimes by Layne Faire (HisDarlin)

@laynefaire Tumblr Fic Post

Liam/Zayn | Explicit | 58k

# Exes to Lovers, Angst with a Happy Ending, Farm Setting, Vineyard, B&B, Horses, Smut, (check full tags).

It’s 2025.

After secretly writing and producing their first album in ten years, One Direction is weeks away from releasing their first new single and announcing a world tour.

With the whirlwind about to begin again, Liam re-evaluates the last ten years - the fame, the money, the people who changed his life forever - and the person who walked away.

💜 Mine Would Be You by crinkle-eyed-boo

@crinkle-eyed-boo Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 115k

# Exes to Lovers, Artist Harry, Writer Louis, Angst with a Happy Ending, Time Jumps, Smut.

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

💜 Own The Scars by crinkle-eyed-boo

@crinkle-eyed-boo Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 115k

# Friends to Lovers, Drug Addiction, Coma, Rehab, Intervention, Recovery, Therapy, Tomlinshaw (Larry Endgame), Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Smut, (check full tags).

“But I don’t belong here,” Louis insists. “Why do you say that?” James asks. “These people are all drug addicts and alcoholics,” Louis shrugs. Something sparks in James’ eyes. “And you’re not?”

Louis has never felt like he was good enough: for his stepdad, for his life-long best friend, for the life he's supposed to want. After an accident that nearly costs him his life, Louis' parents send him to rehab where he’s forced to face his demons. On the long and difficult road to recovery, Louis must confront the truths he’s been avoiding about his future, his relationships, and his sense of self-worth. Because before he can love anyone else, he’s got to learn how to love himself first.

💜 Fiction Romance by orphan account

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 18k

# Strangers to Lovers, Blind Date, Punk Louis, Student Harry, Smut.

Harry has a type.

He likes older, sophisticated, mature men. Well-educated men. Men with life experience and passion for arts and social causes. Men who are established in their careers, who've sorted their lives out.

Niall knows this.

And so Harry can't understand why he's sat here opposite Louis Tomlinson.

💜 If Only We Wish Hard Enough by lululawrence

@lululawrence Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Not Rated | 5k

# Peter Pan Fusion, Louis is Peter, Harry is Tinkerbelle (except he’s the same size as Louis), Friends to Lovers (no smut), Flirting, Pining, Fluff.

Before Harry let Louis know he was there, he gave himself a moment to just admire him. Truly take him in.

Today, Louis was wearing one of his soft, simple green dresses that in many ways resembled the ones fairies often wore. Harry loved when Louis wore dresses. They showed off Louis’ waist and thighs more than any of his other outfits, and Harry loved that about them.

“You know I can hear your wings fluttering so you aren’t fooling anyone,” Louis said before turning and looking over his shoulder.

Or the five times fic where Louis is Peter Pan, Harry is his best friend Tinkerbelle, and it takes them awhile but they figure things out.

💜 I Can’t Do This Alone (Sometimes I just need a light) by Only_angel_28

@beau-soleil-louis Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Not Rated | 8k

# Strangers to Lovers (no smut), Meet Cute, Doctor Harry, Tattoo Artist Louis, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Loneliness, Touch-Starved Harry, Flirting, Fluff, Hopeful Ending, (check full tags).

“Harry,” he says after another contemplative moment, “can I hug you?”

It’s been...well, Harry doesn’t actually know how long it’s been. Less than an hour, probably, but already Louis says his name like it’s safe in his mouth, and now he’s opening his arms like Harry could be safe there too.

“Please,” Harry nearly sobs, and sinks into him the way butter melts on toast. It’s an apt metaphor, really, because what Louis is giving him is as essential and sustaining as a loaf of bread to a starving man. His basic need for physical affection is as vital as his need for sustenance, for sleep, and he can’t believe he’s allowed himself to ignore it for so long.

Or: Harry is having a rough time. Louis is the kind stranger who makes him smile again.

💜 You Make Lovin’ Fun by homosociallyyours

@homosociallyyours Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 110k

# Girl Direction, Strangers to Lovers, Polyamory, Cruise Ships, Silver Fox Louis, Daddy Kink, Age Difference, Smut.

Harry is a 28 year old travel writer at a gay magazine who gets the assignment to go a lesbian cruise. She figures it's a nice chance to have some fun in the sun, but she's not expecting much else-- even if her partner and best friend are both encouraging her to hook up with someone while she's there.

When she locks eyes with a gorgeous silver fox from across the room, she starts to think she could've been wrong. There are lots of things standing in the way of anything real happening with her and Louis, but that doesn't stop them from falling for one another. True love isn't always easy, but they do make lovin' fun.

💜 As Deep As The Sky by swallowsmateforlife

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 12k

# ABO, Strangers to Lovers, Alpha Harry, Omega Louis, Smut.

A passed-out omega on the bathroom floor isn't exactly what Harry had in mind when he thought about taking a cute boy home. The idea of leaving Louis there, vulnerable and unresponsive, weighs guiltily at Harry's conscience. Turns out it's the best decision he'll ever make.

💜 Someone To Fly Home To by kingsofeverything

@kingsofeverything Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 35k

# Exes to Lovers, Divorce, Older Harry/Louis (in their 50s), Pilot Louis, Teacher Harry, Smut.

Louis. 55 year old pilot who wants someone to fly home to. Harry swipes right.

💜 Ghost Note Symphony by whoknows

@crazyupsetter

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 96k

# Proximity Curse, Blood and Gore, Supernatural Elements, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Smut, (check full tags).

Louis is on tour when he first hears about it. It’s all over the news – Harry Styles Attacked By Fan runs in headlines for days. It’s not even just the gossip rags, either. Actual journalists are covering the story. It would have been impossible to avoid hearing about it. Technically, Oli is the one who tells Louis about it, but it’s not exactly being covered up. Harry doesn’t answer Louis’ text asking if he’s alright, but that’s not really surprising. They haven’t spoken for months, and it’s been a lot longer than that since they’ve had a real conversation. The sting of the text going unanswered is still there, less painful than it might have been a few years ago.

It’s not that it’s easy to forget about, exactly. Louis has a whole life outside of One Direction now, though. So Louis goes on with his life, figuring that if Harry was seriously hurt he would have heard about it by now. He might currently be in the same country as Harry, but being on opposite sides of it puts enough distance between them that putting it in the back of his mind is easy. There’s nothing Louis could do, even if he thought Harry might want him to.

That’s why everything that happens next comes as a complete shock to him.

💜 Soaked In The Blood Of Angels by whoknows

@crazyupsetter

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 41k

# Creatures AU, Vampires, Incubus, Dubious Consent, Blood and Violence, Smut, (check full tags).

The boy looks drugged, caught between a man who’s almost twice his size and a girl who looks like she wouldn’t even break a sweat snapping him in half despite her small stature, eyes closed and mouth open as he pants, arching up between them almost as if he’s trying to escape.

Normally, Harry would ignore it and continue on his search for someone to drink from, someone who wouldn’t mind his sharp teeth and rough hands. He’s seen plenty of boys like this one, ones who picked the wrong playmates, and if he stopped to rescue every single one of them he would have died from thirst a long time ago.

This one, though. There’s something about this one, the sheen of his bright blue eyes as he blinks slowly, looks around as though he doesn’t know where he is, the weakness of his hands as he tries to push the girl off of him and make his escape.

💜 Say Something by kingsofeverything

@kingsofeverything Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 105k

# ABO, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Age Difference, 50 Year Old Harry, 28 Year Old Louis, Insecure Harry, Unplanned Pregnancy, Lawyer Harry, Theatre Manager/Actor Louis, Hurt/Comfort, Smut, (check full tags).

At fifty years old and recently divorced, Omega Harry Styles isn't interested in dating. When his doctor suggests a heat and rut matching service, he signs up out of necessity. It’s the only use he has for an Alpha in his life.

Twenty-eight-year-old Alpha Louis Tomlinson aims to change that.

💜 Until by allwaswell16

@allwaswell16 Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 38k

# Strangers to Enemies to Lovers, Famous Harry, Non-Famous Louis, Actor Harry, Songwriter Louis, Cowboy Harry, Farm Setting, Smut.

Rural Eagle County, Colorado wasn’t the type of place to find a famous musician or actor. At least not until songwriter Louis Tomlinson showed up with pop star Niall Horan to visit his uncle’s horse ranch, and they just happened to find themselves next door to a reclusive former movie star.

#June 29 2020 #28th appreciation #except I'm a day late - oops #june fic rec #fic rec #monthly fic rec #ficrectag

69 notes · View notes

jacscorner · 4 years

Text

The Shiitake Hills and Drake Lands - D&D Super Mario: Races and Setting Notes

So after the Mario and Luigi posts I did before, I wanted to sort of expand on this loose concept of ‘Super Mario as a D&D Setting’ that I’ve had kicking around while I was suffering from chronic online college. :P

Now, this isn’t a coherent post, this is just a bunch of notes of how I’d convert the general concept of Super Mario games and some races. This would probably need full on World Anvil in order to turn these loose ideas and concepts into a proper campaign setting. And this is under the premise that my would-be players would be outsiders coming into this setting either by plane walking or by travel.

But, hey, if this can be used as a springboard for others to use for their own campaign, then be my guest! I wouldn’t put it here if I so badly wanted to keep this private! But this’ll be a long post, so continue at your own risk.

The Shiitake Hills are the stand in for the mushroom kingdom. These long rows of Hills are home to various farm lands and small villages. There’s very few cities. Mushrooms are mostly cultivated for the consumption and export-you’d be surprised how many recipes there are for cooked toadstools. But rest assured, mushrooms aren’t the only foodstuff you’ll find, but their cultivation for food and magical components is so common that even the most ignorant of school child or even someone who’s never even seen a mushroom would know how to cultivate enough edible fungus to never miss lunch.

The capital of this kingdom is Toadstool City, a glorious city. It’s not perfect, but magic is practiced in the open-it’s regulated, but not too restrictive and controlling. So long as your not raising the dead or raising a stink, you can practice most forms of magic in relative peace.

The Shiitake Hills were founded originally by Elven Druids, who had left their original home in order to escape prosecution from another clan of Druids. On their sailing across oceans, they’d come across a community of Halflings, whom were under the rule of a tyrannical wizard. The Head of these Elven Druids would take on these Halflings as fellow refugees.

This trip lasted 1000 years, with 800 of them spent with the Halfling survivors. Their culture would meld together, to the point where there was no way of knowing what custom originated from which group, but it mattered not. Both sides had developed a mutual relationship.

When The Shiitake Hills were founded the family of the Head Druid would lead colonization of the land. They would also introduce the various Elven Gods that the Druids worshiped.

Avus, God of Fatherhood, Life, and Light. A father should be a guiding light for the family. To be strong and nurturing. A father who is not in their child’s life is often struck by Avus.

Mater Goddess of Fertility, Birth, and Motherhood. Avus’s wife and the reason he gained the ‘Fatherhood’ title. Preying to her is often done when an Elf is about to give birth.

Natus God of Knowledge, Teaching, and Fire. His legends speak of him being the original cultivator of fire, and gifting his spark of knowledge down to the Elves who worship him and spread it. Knowledge is never to be hoarded, it’s to be spread and shared.

Frater God of Strength, War, and Courage. When thunder booms, it means he’s fighting and he wants his followers to also be prepared for the heat of battle. Never fear death, for only glory waits for those who races into battle!

Soror Goddess of Sisterhood, Art, and Battle. The sister to Frater, she gives strength to her female followers to follow their dreams and passions, but to always have a knife at the ready to defend what’s yours.

Puer God of Tricksters, Brotherhood, and Nature. He teaches his followers to use nature to their advantage, to use ingenuity and wits to defeat larger foes, but to never use your trickery to back stab your brothers-in-arms.

Avanculus God of Wisdom, Harvest, and Water. Knowledge is knowing the best way to farm with new techniques. Wisdom is understand the old ways still work when they fail.

And the Matriarch of their Pantheon, Astrum, Goddess of the Sun, Moon, and Stars.

But over the boarder of the hills is The Drake Lands. The land was originally a beautiful Dwarven Kingdom of glorious mountains. But then, two dragons razed the lands, a Red Dragon and a Green Dragon, who used the mountains as a battle field! Fire and Poisonous gas drove out the Dwarves underneath. The mountains burned and the poison killed almost all other life that didn’t escape. Nobody knows quite who won this fight, but whatever the result was, the two dragons eventually mated and had a child that would make the ruined lands their domain.

This Dragon is known as Oghoid, A Lawful Evil God of Conquest, Battle, and Gold. His descendants would be known as the Royal Clan who would turn these barren lands into a somewhat liveable place.

The Dwarves would’ve raced to the Shiitake Lands as refugees. The Elves and Halflings welcomed the Dwarves. They integrated into society, but their culture is still regularly practiced. Dwarves keep many Gods, but they had no trouble also incorporating the Elf’s-what’s 1 or 8 more to the pile? The Dwarves also brought expert stone cutting and construction. Many constructions are built mostly or even entirely by Dwarven hands.

Boy, that was a lot, but time to get into the Races. And please not that I’ll label them as ‘Good, Neutral, and Evil’ races for the sake of convenience. You can take a Good Race and play them evil and vice versa.

Good Races - The typical Good Guys and regular residents of the Shiitake Hills.

The Humans of the Super Mario series are split into 3 Types for the setting: Normal-Types, Mario-Types, and Princess-Types.

Normal-Types are the New Donk City citizens we see in Super Mario Odyssey. These are Humans, no doubt having come from various traders from outside of the kingdom and might’ve stayed and become full citizens.

Mario-Types are Mario, Luigi, Wario, and Waluigi-oddly proportioned humanoids. For this setting, they’re Dwarves-yes, even Waluigi. He’s just an oddly tall Dwarf. It happens. Meanwhile, Mario and Luigi are plumbers and have no trouble going underground and fixing things.

And finally, Princess-Types. Peach, Daisy, Rosalina, and Pauline-oddly tall, and still have odd proportions, but look less like Mickey Mouse and more like Jessica Rabbit. They’re represented by Elves. Elves are usually in the upper class of Shiitake society.

Yes, they could all just be variant humans of some kind, but shush. :P This is suppose to be a big mass of races living on one continent and want to mix them all together.

Toads, if you couldn’t guess, are represented as Halflings. Why? Well, not only are they short, but what do we usually see Toads doing? We see them mostly in domestic roles, with only a few outliers. Halflings are mostly homely folk who want to be left in their homes and just enjoy their quaint lives.

Neutral Race - Not inherently Good Nor Bad, Just Folk

Yoshis in this setting will be played by Lizardfolk. I know that this is a pretty big stretch-Yoshis are cute and colorful and Lizardfolk are written as cold, calculating ‘survival of the fittest’ types. But I take the official text of WoTC as more like suggestions.

Evil Race - Typical Bad Guys and residents of The Drake Lands

So naturally, this sections will have Koopas, but how do we divide them? Well, I think there are 2 Types of Koopas. Regular Koopas and Koopa Rexes.

I percieve ‘Koopa Rex’ as essentially Bowser, his son, and the Koopalings-and maybe Boom-Boom and Pom-Pom, depending on how you see it. They would be Dragonborn.

Regular Koopas are essentially the rest. Koopa Troopas, Hammer Bros, Magikoopas, so on and so forth. They’re Tortles.

Okay, this is where I start to REALLY stretch the limits of what can be what...

Goombas will be classified as Kobolds. Why Kobolds? Well, honestly, I guess no real reason, but I think it makes sense for Bowser’s army to have the ‘Minion Races’ in the ranks.

Speaking of , Shy Guys are Kenkus in this setting.

And Boos, Goblins. Okay, this one, a bit of a stretch, but what do Boos do? They sneak up on you, right? Well, Goblins can use that tactic too!

Well, yeah, they could just be Ghosts. But, like, I hate using Ghosts in D&D. They’re too much of a pain in the ass to deal with. And, if you can’t tell, this isn’t meant to be a 1-to-1 thing.

And finally, the Bob-Ombs are Warforged-possibly one that you could give the ability to ‘selfdestruct’ upon defeat or something.

And that’s about the end of my notes. This took, like, two hours to write but I wanted to put this all down somewhere and here it is. Nothing here is final and if you wanna use any of it for any reason, go right ahead~

#Super Mario #Nintendo #Dungeons and Dragons #dungeons & dragons #DnD #D&D #Super Mario Campaign Setting

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loveaurapearl · 4 years

Text

Storm in the Heart

(One-shot story of Steven Universe. It takes place before Steven’s birth and is kind of a reverse of Storm in the Room. There are some head cannons and this fanfic assumed Rose and Vidalia made the painting and that they had an argument after the said painting was made.)

Rose sighed as she looked at the painting of herself hanged above the room to the inner temple and then looked at her stomach, which has increased since the six months she began to form a child in her body. A feeling of fear and regret raced her mind when she noticed Pearl’s gem on the door glowed. The door opened and the peach haired rock alien exited her room with a warm smile. The two quickly noticed each other. “Ah, Rose! It’s good to see you again. How was your trip to this Vidalia person’s place? Did you get the painting you wanted?” Pearl asked in a caring tone. The Quartz woman nodded and looked at the painting. “Yes, and it’s a beautiful piece of art. I just can’t wait for Steven or Nora to see it and appreciate all the hard work that was put into it.” Rose said with a warm voice; however, Pearl could tell her ‘friend’ was upset. “Are you okay? You didn’t look happy. Did something happen at Greg’s friend’s house?” Pearl asked. The quartz looked away and then sighed. “At first, everything was normal as I examined all her earthly objects. We talked about how wonderful how humans are, but Vidalia thought us Gems were much better since we didn’t have to go through some ‘awkward’ middle stage from baby to adult. I don’t know what exactly was so embarrassing about change, but I could tell she didn’t like talking about it and we changed to the subject to my baby. She… she tried to talk me out of having the childlike you guys, and… we ended on bad terms. I really hope I didn’t upset her too much.” The leader of the Crystal Gems stated as she sat on the warp panel. Pearl sat next to her and placed her hand on her shoulder.

“Rose, it’ll be okay. So, what if she doesn’t agree with your ideas? You don’t need to listen to her anyway. Besides, it’s… it’s fine that you’re having this child. What matters the most is what makes you feel good.” Pearl said, trying to hide her feelings about the child. Rose looked at her friend and smiled. “Thanks, Pearl. You always know what to say to make me feel better. But… I still have her words in my head. I wish I could talk to my child's face to face right now so I could have a genuinely good time with them.” The pink-haired woman bemoaned.

“Why not use your room to create an approximation of the child? You could have all kinds of fun without losing your shapeshifted form and you could talk to the child as much as you want.” Pearl stated in a knowing voice. Rose looked at her best friend with stars in her eyes. “Oh! THANK YOU, PEARL! That’s a wonderful idea! ” She yelled as she stood up with excitement. Pearl smiled. “Oh, it’s nothing, Rose.” She began to say before noticing Rose had run off to her room. Pearl sighed in annoyance.

Meanwhile, Rose giggled as the door behind her closed. Her room was an endless pink sky and pink cloud landscape with pink clouds as the ground. She giggled as her mind raced with ideas on what her child will be like. “Hmm… should I have the room give me Steven or Nora?” She thought since it was the most important question. She thought for a moment and then decided on which gender she wanted. “Okay… Let’s try, Steven. But…what would he look like? I guess mostly like a young Greg but maybe with a lighter…no darker brown hair color and no beard.” Soon a young boy that looked exactly like a teenage Greg appeared in front of her, the only difference was his hair was a darker color. “Oh, I love the shirt, but maybe he should have clean, undamaged blue pants and pink sandals. And shape his chin to look a bit more like my own.” She said aloud and the boy suddenly had those clothes on him and adjusted his chin to look more like Steven. “Oh! I love it! But… maybe he should have a different hairstyle than from Greg. But what kind? Maybe my old Pink Diamond hairstyle but without those bits of hair poking out… OH! It’ll look like a rose from behind! You’re a genius Rose! Thank you, Rose,” She said. The boy transformed, his hair now having five bumps of hair around his head. (Think Current Steven in Steven Universe Future, but his black shirt is ripped.) “Hmmm… something’s missing. How about a jacket? A pink jacket!” She said aloud, and soon a pink jacket (that looks exactly like the one in Future and the movie) appeared on the boy.

“Perfect! This is exactly how I want Steven to look like. Hey, I should make a jacket for my son or daughter with these exact measurements. They look so good on it. Amethyst could be the model!” She giggled. The boy giggled as well. “Thanks, mom.” He said, rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment, surprising the gem. “Oh, Steven, that’s your voice. It’s a wonderful sounding voice. So strong, so majestic, I bet you would be a wonderful singer, just like your dad.” Rose said in amazement. They soon both laughed.

After a while, they calmed down and looked at each other. “Soo…. What now?” The young teen asked, not sure what to do now. Rose began to think. “Hmmm… What do a mom and son do together?” Rose asked, then a football appeared out of clouds. Rose grabs the object. “Sports, dah. Just like in those videos Greg shows me. Now, catch Steven!” She yelled, then threw the ball quite far. Steven rushed over to where the ball was going to land. “Isn’t this wonderful? I can’t believe I’m hanging out with my mom. This is just the best. I hope to have as much fun as I’m having with you as I will when I’m with the gems.” He said, then jumped up and grabbed the ball. He floats down as his shirt flapped, showing her gem on his stomach. “Oh yeah… my gem and my powers would go into you Steven…” Rose said as she realized this. Suddenly Pink Pearl appeared in front of Rose and yelled, “GO STEVEN!” Rose gasped in shock and whipped at the figure, turning it back into clouds. Steven landed and turned back to Rose.

“Huh? Was that Pearl? She sounded different.” Steven asked, confused by the sudden sound. Rose sweated. “Well, it doesn’t matter. Everything is fine. We… still need to play more Football! I want to see you do a kick!” Rose said as she tried to distract the boy and herself from the apparition. Steven nodded and threw the ball back. Rose jumps and catches the ball easily. She then lands and swats as she placed the ball in a way for Steven to kick it. “This is exactly what we need, some good old round of sports!” Steven said, then began to run. She smiled as Steven rushed over to her. She then quickly lifts up the ball before Steven kicked it, causing him to launch into the air and then land on his back. The two soon laughed. “You have a marvelous laugh, Steven. I can’t wait for you to share this laugh with the world. And with a charming personality, I bet you will have tons of friends and lovers,” Rose said in a mischievous tone. Steven sat up and looked away, embarrassed. “Mom, you’re embarrassing me. Besides, I would rather have one person who really loves me for who I am than have a bunch of girlfriends and boyfriends that I see as toys. After all, isn’t that what you and Dad have?” The teen said with pride. Rose’s eyes watered up and she hugged the boy. “Oh, how mature and responsible you are, Steven. I really wished I had come to that conclusion sooner, but… it doesn’t matter, I’m happy, you’re happy, everyone’s happy! You’re going to grow up, big and strong, and loved, and happy, and… and… full of so many possibilities! You are going to be wonderful, Steven.” She said, then laughed.

Steven smiled and hugged her back. “Hey, want to play another game? Oh! Maybe, hide and seek!” He suggested. Rose smiled. “Sure. You go hide, and once I’m done counting to ten, I’ll find you. Just make sure you don’t disappear. That would be cheating.” She ordered. Steven nodded then ran off. Rose covered her eyes to make sure the game was fair. “Okay. 1, 2, 3, 4.” She began to count. The area shifted underneath her to a large garden with tons of vegetation, pillars, and a warp nearby. “5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10! Ready or not! Here I … The garden? Why? Why am I back here?” Rose said, the last part being stated as she uncovered her eyes and saw where she was. She then looked around and saw Spinel, smiling at her. The heart gem was trapped in vines that were wrapped around her feet, her hair was a mess, and tear marks were under her eyes. “P-Pink? PINK! Oh my stars, you’re back! You came back for me! It’s been, what about five thousand years since we last saw each other? But you came back! You’re here to rescue me!” Spinel said with excitement as she broke free from the vines. Rose froze in horror as her ‘best friend’ wrapped her wiggly arms around her. “Spinel, I’m not Pink Diamond anymore, I’m Rose. And I’m… I’m so sorry. I wish this was real. I really do, but the galaxy warp is broken. If only it wasn’t broken, then… then I could rescue you for real. I could feel happy seeing you again, but… but I know it’s not real. I know you’re not here. I… I wished I had never told you to stay in this place and rot away, but I can’t change the past and I can’t repair the warp without causing suspicion on myself. So please! Let me GO!” Rose roared, the area under her shaking, the image of Spinel dissipating, the ground broke under her, and a shock wave raced through the air. Rose covered her mouth in horror as tears fell down her eyes.

“I’m… I’m so sorry, Spinel. I’m so, so sorry. Please… forgive Steven for the horrible things I did.” Rose said as she held herself as she shocked in fear. After a few seconds, she heard someone’s footsteps. She looked up and saw Steven, however, his eyes were covered in shadow. Next to him was Lion. “S-steven? Did… did you see that? I can explain. I can explain everything, just please, don’t be mad at me.” Rose panicked. Steven lifted his head, and she saw he had Pink Diamond’s eyes. Rose stiffened in fear. “Explain. That’s rich coming from you. You never explain yourself. YOU only runaway. Just like how you ran away from Homeworld and now, you’re running away from yourself to become me. You never change and you never WILL CHANGE,” He said, but it was cold and detached. He then laughed but it sounded wrong. “No! That’s wrong! I… I’m not running away! I only doing this so something brand new can be formed. Something wonderful, something spectacular. You’re going to be human, Steven. We’re going to be human. We’re going to fix everything! WE CAN CHANGE!” Rose yelled. Steven growled and walked over to her, his steps cracking the ground underneath him. “Is that ALL I AM TO YOU!? A way to fix your mistakes?! What about Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl? You’re leaving them behind! You know very well that they need you! They hang onto your every word, especially Amethyst! You haven’t even told Pearl, you’re most trusted ally, about Lion! What will she think once she learns the truth!? What will they think of you when they learn the truth about the war and you’re true identity!? What’s going to happen to them once you’re gone and I take your place?” Steven yelled. He was almost inches away from her when he stopped moving. Despite him being smaller than her, Rose was as stiff as aboard. “The … The Crystal Gems can handle themselves. They… they don’t need me. I’m just impeding them from fulfilling their dreams. Besides, Pearl won’t mind Lion. She’ll just think of him as an annoyance, just like Greg.” Rose tried to justify herself.

“What about Dad? You promised to be by his side forever, but now he’s going to have to raise me up all by himself. The gems don’t know how to take care of me, especially once I start showing my powers! And Dad won’t know how to deal with me once that happens! You don’t even know if I will even get any powers! I’ll JUST BE USELESS!” Steven yelled. Rose grabbed her head. It was starting to pound. “Steven, it… it won’t matter. You’re going to be human. Being human is much more amazing than having these stupid powers. It… It’ll be enough. We’ll find a way to fix the corrupted gems some other way, and we can live happily ever after. And even if you do have my powers, when we’re happy, our terrible powers won’t appear, so it doesn’t matter,” Rose said as she tried to block the pain, putting up a smile. “Once everything is over, we’ll laugh, and sing, and… and be happy. We can do whatever we want.”

“What about the Diamonds? What about Spinel? What about Pink Pearl!? Are you forgetting that they are still suffering because of you? OR did you want me to fix them too!? I’ll learn the truth eventually and so will the Crystal Gems. They’ll have to face the fact that everything you told them, the war, Bismuth, your identity, IT WAS ALL A LIE!” Steven yelled, the ground cracking even more. Rose fell onto her butt. Her stomach was aching as she felt the baby inside her kicking. “Steven, please, stop! We’re wrecking this place. Besides, I had to do this. It was the only way. Spinel had to stay here otherwise; she’ll just make me look like a fool! The Diamonds never cared about me, they never cared about us! I tried talking to them, but they WOULDN’T LISTEN! Besides, the Diamonds aren’t coming back to this planet! After they corrupted the gems, they ran off to conquer more plants! So why should they care about a place like this!? And it’s too late to tell the gems about my identity, otherwise, they’ll just fear and hate you if I do it now!” Rose yelled. Steven growled and stood over her. “Don’t lie to me, mother. You know very well the diamonds will come back. You’re just too afraid to admit it. They’ll come back, and so on; everyone will see you as you truly are. A weak, pathetic monster trying to hide from the mess you’ve made. And I’ll be the one who’ll have to fix it.” Steven said as his eyes became covered in shadows.

“Please… please, Steven. Stop saying these awful things. Everything, everything will be alright. Y-you know in your heart that I love you. Y-you know that everything will be fine in the end, b-because you’re Steven Universe. And… and things will be alright. We… we can do this. Just, please, STOP!” Rose yelled, her voice becoming a young Steven at the end. Rose covered her mouth and began to cry as the child inside her stopped kicking for a while. Rose looked up and saw Steven crying as well, his eye returned to ‘normal’. The room had become clouds again and it had begun to rain. Rose got up and hugged the boy. “I’m… I’m sorry, Steven. I never wanted this to get out of hand as they did. But… but I’m just… afraid. I’m afraid of you hating me and yourself for us being like this. I hate myself for being this… thing. I hate that I left Spinel alone and now can’t go back to get her. I hate that I caused the war and that I lie to my friends. I hate myself for locking Bismuth away. I… I thought if I ended being Pink Diamond, the pain, the agony, our suffering would stop. I could stop lying to my friends and we could stop the diamonds and unbubble Bismuth. But then the diamonds corrupted my friends and… and it was too late to reveal the truth. I’m afraid of Bismuth hurting everyone and trying to shatter me and you. I’m afraid of the Crystal gems giving up on us and running away. I’m afraid of being seen as Pink Diamond and hurting my friends again. I don’t want to be so awful. I just want to be happy which is why… I want to be you, Steven, SO much. You can change, Steven. You can FIX EVERYTHING! You can get through to people in ways I will never be able to. You can change people’s minds. You don’t need to be afraid of the truth or of the Diamonds hurting us anymore. I… I just… want you to be happy. I want you to love yourself. I’m sorry that your mom is stuck as this broken, unfixable mess and… I wish that wasn’t the case.” Rose said as she hugged her son, her voice had returned to normal. She felt the boy hug her back. “Mom… I… I love, you,” He said, sorrowful. Rose sheds a tear. “I… I love you too Steven. I just hope, the real you will say the same thing.” She said as the rain lightened up.

“I’m going to miss you, mom,” Steven said as he looked at her. Rose softly laughed. “I’m going to miss everyone, Steven. But… we’re going to fix things. We’re going to be fully happy soon, and… and we will have a happily ever after.” She said with a smile. Steven smiled then dissipated into clouds. Rose lifted her hand forward and caught the last bit of rain. Rose hugged herself as the door leading out appeared. Rose exited her room and saw Greg sitting at the edge of the cave entrance with a guitar in his hands, which surprised her. “Oh! Greg, what are you doing here right now?” She asked. The man chuckled as he noticed her. “Heya Rose, how are you? Hey… were you crying?” Greg asked as he noticed the remnants of tears on her face. Rose whipped them off. “I’m fine. I… was just thinking about how wonderful our little child will be after my visit to Vidalia. I was thinking about all the possible opportunities he could be apart of and… I was afraid if he would like me or not.” Rose said, a bit of the truth leaking out as she looked to the side.

“Did you and Vidalia get into a fight? She called me a bit earlier about to say something before congratulating me on our child. I didn’t think of it at the time, but if you’re upset too, then maybe Vidalia was trying to tell me about said incident before changing her mind. If so, I gotta say, that was actually quite mature for her to do.” Greg said. Rose looked at the man. “Y-yes. We did have a fight. Vidalia wasn’t … so sure if I would be a good mother or not to our son. She thought I was selfish, immature, and a brat. I’m not so sure about it myself. I went to my room to think it over.” Rose lied. Greg sadly smiled as he looked at his wife. “Rose, even if you are all those things, you won’t be a terrible mother to our child. As long as you are truthful, loving, and caring, ya know like you always are, then Steven or Nora will love being your child.” Greg said, causing Rose to tear up again, “Rose, are you okay?” Rose looked at the magical door and then back to Greg. She took a deep breath. “Greg… there’s something I need to tell you. I know I should have told you and the gems sooner, but… I was afraid that telling you this would convince you to not let me have our child.” Rose said. This confused the young father-to-be. “Whatever it is, Rose, I’m all ears. You shouldn’t be afraid of telling me anything.” He said with a smile.

Rose took in a deep breath. “Greg… I won’t survive having this child. Once Steven or Nora is born, I won’t exist anymore. I’ll be gone and my gem will become a part of our child. Steven or Nora will be half gem and thus will have magical abilities. You’ll have to raise them with the Crystal Gems in order to help control their power.” Rose confessed. Greg’s eyes shrank and he became wobbly. He sat down as he looked two ways as he tried to process what he had just heard. Rose sat down next to him in worry. Greg looked at her in shock. “Wh-what!? You’re going to… So… you’re dying so our child can live! Rose, why did you do this? We could have just adopted if you wanted a child that badly. You didn’t need to sacrifice yourself.” Greg yelled, shocked and scared. Rose looked down. “Greg… I didn’t want to adopt it. It just wouldn’t feel right owning a child that wasn’t ours. Yes, we would own the child and maybe perhaps it would learn to love us, but I just… it would just feel like I was being a part of a human tradition instead of truly having a child. I have been alive for a long, long time. I have witness humans from birth to old age. I… I didn’t want to outlive our child, knowing that it even belonged to me or you. Plus, our child will be something nobody will have ever seen before. They will be extraordinary beyond belief. I just hope they will understand that I just want them to live the life they want to have.” Rose explained. Greg hugged her shoulder.

“Honey… I… understand. I may not be a gem, but the idea of outliving your loved ones, especially your child sounds like a very scary thing. I’m not going to change your mind about your decision, I just wished you didn’t feel like you had to hide this fact from me and the others. And don’t worry about our kid, honey bun, I’ll make sure the kid will have a great time on this earth.” He said with a smile. Rose laughed. “Thanks, honey. I’m glad you understand. I just hope the gems will be as tolerant of my decision.” Rose said. Greg laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you make them understand. Besides, it’s not like we change things now.” He said. Rose nodded. “Yeah. Oh, and don’t worry about Steven or Nora hating you. Your honey bun will make sure they will understand how great you are.” Greg said with reassurance. Rose laughed. “Thanks, honey.” She said. The scene faded out.

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blindrapture · 4 years

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The Structure of Ulysses, plus Sonic, Part I

Ulysses is a big book. And I intend on adapting all of it at some point into a series I call Sonic Hamlet, where everyone is played by video game characters. I’m not going to explain why video game characters just yet, you’ve got to just accept them for now.

So far, I have not made much progress with the actual adaptation (I have the first third of the first episode done and on YouTube, click here for it). However, I have made progress in rereading and understanding Ulysses, I’ve made far more progress than I honestly thought I was capable of. And I think I might be ready to at least outline some things. I believe strongly that Ulysses will be of interest to many people alive today, and I do not accept language as a valid barrier to comprehension, only a temporary obstacle. But the onus is on those of us who have read Ulysses, we have to be the ones to clear those obstacles away, we cannot just expect people to read it, we have to help because those obstacles are very much there! Ulysses was hard to read even at its time, but there’s a difference between an intentional challenge and the changing of parlance over time. And the intentional challenge? Is wonderful. It in fact helps us embrace life, the big and the little things in it, the complicated cycles that overwhelm, the fast-paced sarcastic comedy of young people, the slow-paced enigmatic wit of those so ancient they perished long ago, the clash of cultures suggesting inevitable conflict and yet still hiding pathways to real diverse peace.

As an adaptation, my work is a sort of translation, this has to be. I don’t want to change any of the words, though-- Ulysses has a structure to it, a mathematical and logical and literary structure, and the specific words are a part of that. Translations into other languages, those naturally must deal with changing the words, but they try their best to still stick within the plan of the original’s intent. The only language I’m translating into is the extratextual-- I’m adding images, sounds, pauses for reflection. I’m realizing an interpretation of the original text, in the hopes that my audience might have a better foothold for comfortably examining and interpreting Ulysses themselves. The original words can still fit in that context. But character names? Sure. I can accept changing those.

So. So. Sonic Hamlet. As Ulysses is a book, so Sonic Hamlet is a show. As Ulysses is of three main parts with various Episodes in each, so Sonic Hamlet is of three seasons with various Episodes. Following me?

Part I, my Season 1, has three episodes. It is sometimes called the Telemachiad, as it deals with the Telemachus of the story, Stephen Dedalus (hereby Sonic Dedalus), as he goes through the motions of an increasingly despondent life without a trustworthy guide.

Part II, my Season 2, has twelve episodes. It is sometimes called the Odyssey, or the Wanderings of Ulysses, as it deals with the Odysseus of the story, Leopold Bloom (hereby Mario Bloom), as he navigates the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune in hopes of returning home victorious.

Part III, my Season 3, has three episodes. It is sometimes called the Nostos, or the Homecoming, as it deals our Odysseus’s bold return and the stratagems which fell the suitors of his wife, Marion “Molly” Bloom (hereby Peach Bloom).

I will, for now, compose three posts, one for each Season. I will not point out all the coolest shit, all the patterns and correspondences, but I will give a general outline as best I can. Maybe this outline, alone, will give all the help a reader needs to “get” the premise of Ulysses and thus be able to read the original. But ultimately I write this not for any reader but for my own benefit. I need to organize and consolidate some things, see. And I’d may as well start somewhere.

So. Here we go.

Part I / Season 1: The Telemachiad (8 AM - Noon)

Episode 1 / 101: Telemachus

Sonic Dedalus is 22 years old. His mother died last year, putting a damper on his aspirations of travelling other countries and becoming a poet. Now he’s contributing rent money to a buddy’s cultural project (”let’s rent out an old watchtower and turn Ireland into Ancient Greece,” that’s about as thought-out as the plan became). His buddy, Big Mulligan, doesn’t seem to have much respect for Sonic, just an incessantly jovial tolerance. Staying with them is Shadow Haines, an Englishman with a gun who wants to write a book of all the quirky folk-sayings of the primitive rural Irish. Big thinks Sonic could contribute a lot to that. Everyone seems to like Big and Shadow; their conspicuous and confident personalities shine above the material worries of the Dublin lower-class. The lady who delivers milk for their breakfast that morning (played by Tikal) listens to Shadow with reverence and doesn’t even seem to notice Sonic, who pays for the breakfast and sees Ireland’s spirit in her. That morning, Big gets Sonic to promise him a sizable chunk of Sonic’s salary will go towards getting them all drunk later. He also gets the key to the tower from him, for some reason. And he gets naked and goes for a swim, as Sonic walks off to do his day’s work.

Episode 2 / 102: Nestor

Sonic works as a temporary teacher at a nearby school. Today, he teaches his class about the historical battle at Asculum, where Pyrrhus gave his famous quote (”another victory like that, and we’re done for”). They’re not terribly interested, since today’s hockey day and they want to play outside, but that’s okay, Sonic’s mind isn’t really focused today either. He’s got some themes battling in his head, and they won’t go away. Though they don’t stop him from at least giving the kids a strange riddle and helping a poor kid with his math homework. And the kids all play hockey. This episode takes its name from an old boastful king, whose advice keeps young Telemachus going (waiting for his father’s return from the war), but also whose company is a bit much in long bursts. Here, Nestor is played by the headmaster of the school (whose video game character I have not assigned), Mr. Deasy. Deasy is a West Briton, the type of Irishman who thinks he’s English and thinks Ireland is just the westernmost province of England. So, probably a Protestant. I really don’t remember right this minute. But in practice, it means Deasy talks down on a lot of people all while thinking he’s being a nice old man. He has money, he keeps his money, he says this is a very English thing to do, and he judges all those who can’t pay their way. He loves history, sees it as one steady march towards the real manifestation of God, and he thinks Sonic unhappy for his view that history is “a nightmare from which I am trying to wake.” But he at least pays him, his salary and some decency. And, knowing Sonic has some “literary contacts,” he gives him a letter to deliver to the newspapers, a letter proposing a solution to foot-and-mouth disease (this will come up later). And as Sonic leaves the school for the day, Deasy hails him down to say one last thing: a jovial bit of earnest antisemitism. “You know why Ireland is one of the only countries that never persecuted the jews?” “Why?” “She never let them in!” And he laughs, the light of the sun dancing coins on his shoulders.

Episode 3 / 103: Proteus

It is now 11 AM. Sonic, after leaving the school, walked all the way to Dublin proper. Here he is on the Strand, a sort of beach, having some alone time, thinking of many things, many memories (his short stay in Paris as a poet, his interactions with the family of uncle Richie who lives nearby to the Strand, his childhood), many subjects (Greek philosophy, Latin theology, aspirations, self-loathing), the sights he sees (midwives with bags, someone walking a dog, lots of flotsam). Ultimately, there’s a trend of trying to pin down the unpinnable, to put into words the ineluctable modality of the visible, the limits of the diaphane; this clues us into the Odyssean correspondence. Proteus is god of the sea, ever changing shapeshifter, who it is said will grant a wish to anyone who is able to hold him still for long enough. Just as Telemachus, in now understanding some context about his father, waits by the sea and wonders how he-- how anyone-- could successfully return with their wits intact when the gods are so multifaceted and the waters so unpredictable, just as Telemachus watches the sea, so does Sonic watch the morphing world of his senses.

And that’s Part I of Ulysses, and that’s Season 1 of Sonic Hamlet. We will see Sonic again later in the day, we’ll actually see quite a bit of him, but this is the point of departure for the text itself. This whole time, the text has taken Sonic’s psyche, the energy and passion and associations dormant in his thoughts, and infused it with a more novel-like narration of What Actually Happens, altogether producing The Text what readers read. It’s happened relatively slowly, with sparks of surprising creativity manifesting in each episode, the “narrative” doing “weird” “things” “all of a sudden,” and Proteus acts as a sort of climax, allowing Sonic’s psyche the whole spotlight and putting What Actually Happens in the background. I’ve said before that the text “wakes up” over the course of these early episodes, but I now think what really happens is the text holds back in order to allow the reader to wake up, to recognize that the text, the narrative itself, is the narrator, that not even focal characters like Sonic are the source of the viewpoint we see, that.. there’s something more going on. A greater Argument being made. But it will take time to even see the whole argument. And here let me bring up medieval pedagogy regarding the art of syllogism: it has been conventional to view the initial order of cognitive thought as “Subject, Middle, Predicate” (as opposed to any other order of those terms which are all, in fact, valid). This is a big factor behind why we’re taught to view stories as constituting a “beginning, middle, end,” and why we’re taught to give arguments (essays!) in the same structure. It’s all because that’s how Christian theology saw the Greek tool of syllogism should be taught, back in the middle ages. With me so far? Okay, cool. So Ulysses is made up of three main parts. There’s a lot of reasons why given episodes are strictly in one part and not others, but perhaps one of the most aesthetically pleasing bits of trivia is that Part I begins with the letter S, Part II begins with the letter M, and Part III begins with the letter P. Subject, Middle, Predicate. A valid structure for a formal argument. Season 1 of Sonic Hamlet, in following Ulysses as far as I feasibly am able to, gives us the thematic subject of a greater argument being made. And that makes Season 2, or Part II, the bulk of the argument, the middle.

So what goes on, then, in the middle of this grand argument? If Sonic isn’t the point, then who is? If Sonic is Telemachus, then who is Odysseus, the wise father-king-husband-hero coming home from the great war? We can interpret the sea of his voyage as probably being his shifting senses, as per Proteus, so then what are the trials on his sea, the trials on his senses? Who are the gods that he faces, what are the stratagems he comes up with in order to appease and survive?

Well, Joyce was adamant of this: The modern Odysseus in Ireland would have to be of Jewish descent. He would have to be a staunch pacifist. He would have to have a marriage in a questionable state of stability. He would have to be a stick in the mud, a party pooper with an adorably dry sense of humour and a physically average build, a serious and unrelenting cuck, and yet a man with sensible ideas of how to spend money generously and pipe dreams of a socialist nation where love and equality triumph. He would not stand in opposition to the modern bigoted uncaring society, his friends and neighbours, but he would be tasked with changing it all the same.

The modern Odysseus is Leopold Bloom. The modern Odysseus is the prototypical social justice warrior.

And that’s who the bulk of Ulysses is about, that’s the psyche we’ll get to explore, that’s what I’ll post about later on.

#sonic hamlet #in making this post i finally went and made the makeshift pictures for Nestor and Proteus #the images are not necessarily reflective of how the final products will look #it would drive me crazy if i tried to keep them all perfect and consistent #because i've still got to make a lot more of them #the episodic structure is honestly one of my favourite parts of the book? it helps me dig in.#so i do want to emphasize an outline around that structure. making sonic hamlet a 'show' naturally follows from this.

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tiny-scientists · 6 years

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Bullying Arc Monster OC Masterlist

By @afanofalltrades ! Artist comments below:

From Left to Right, we have: Gooper McGrime is younger than PAPYRUS. They are an artistic (and gluttonous) little blob. They LOVE to make art (and eat) art of all kinds. They can usually be found in the art studio (pigging out on paint and paste). Klaus Kringle is older than PAPYRUS, but younger than sans. He’s a Giftmas Elf and proud of it! He loves anything associated with Giftmas time, snowmonsters, gingerbread, decorating the Giftmas tree, you name it! Duchess Permestein is older than sans. She’s a classic two faced mean girl bully who picks on the kindergarteners. Anyone who’s not one of her target see her as a cute and innocent puppy. She is the smartest, prettiest, and most popular kid at school. Since it’s the bullying arc, why not make a bully?

This character was also created by @afanofalltrades! Artist comments below:

This is my Kindergarten Teacher entry for the OC Contest, Ms. Kringle! I decided that I’d make another Giftmas Elf. Ms. Kringle is a very kind and hands on teacher. She's very in roots with her heritage, so her classroom has a Giftmas aesthetic year round. She's great with children and enjoys arts and crafts, giving gifts, music, and baking.

Created by @mythicalcanary . Artist comments below:

There’s a principal, teacher and a bunch of students in this image.

Wendy, created by @beastb0ne . Artist chose not to put commentary.

Pastel, by @skeletalegastertalevoidtale ! Artist comments below:

Pastel, 24, who also goes by Mr.Pastel, is a ghost/fire elemental, his flames too weak to burn anything and coming off as more of a glow than fire. He’s a very energetic and fun teacher, and quite enjoys books of all sorts, kids just loving how goofy and fun he can be, the singular, curled hair atop his head something they ask about often. He loves teaching English as well as art, but any other subject is fine with him, he always floating into the room with such energy that has the kids leaving with big smiles and giggles, even if they were having a bad day beforehand.

Webs, by @skeletalegastertalevoidtale ! Artist comments below:

Webs,an 11 year old spider/wind elemental,who’s timid and shy,and loves insects and lizards.He’s a total sweetheart,and likes making friends,but sometimes prefers being by himself with a nice book while fiddling with his scarf. He does get nervous easily,his ticks being to play with his scarf,hide his chin in his scarf,or to fiddle with his fingers. He has a pet spotted lizard named Sammy,and brings him everywhere,always holding him in his hands and petting him,his pockets full of treats and food for his little buddy. (ima be honest he was a skele but I did modify him a bit cause he was a perfect boi to just be chillin in the background or smth for this)

Mr. Remix, created by @beastb0ne ! Artist chose not to put commentary.

Mereli created by @kizza-arts ! Artist comments below:

This is my monster OC Mereli! She’s kinda fuzzy like a peach all over (And if just the suspenders is too much you can put her in any clothes tbh) She’s very motherly and adores children and taking care of others. She loves gardening and helping, and I think she’d make a good Kindergarten teacher.

Plazmo created by @spectroamer. Artist commentary below:

10 years, Plazmo is an elemental monster. He can sometimes get mixed up with adults because of his lack of striped clothing. In case soul elements matter, his soul would be perseverance. He is very talkative, kind and likes to play games with friends.

Cassidy created by @drawer-frisk ! Artist chose not to put commentary.

Characters created by @sadlittlehiney. Artist commentary below:

Mr. Blubber is a chill, but way too old to still be working principal. He cares about kids and education, but his mind is going fast. He used to have a wool sock to warm the end of his tail, but he lost it and now wears a winter hat instead. Miss Feather-Quill is probably my favorite design I came up with. I know its hard to tell, but she wears a knee length sweather dress under her cloak. She studied and interned to be a scientist, but found that the field had too much pressure, so she moved back to Snowdin to teach. That way she could share her love of science and learning with her students while also continuing her own studies during her free time. A bit idealistic and wants all her students to be friends or at least tolerate eachother. Rugby’s design is a mix between a snow leopard and a saber tooth tiger. As his name might suggest, he would rather play sports or rough house than go to school. He is 6, but is repeating kindergarten because of maturity issues and lack luster grades. Since then he’s become more proactive in getting other people off task and doing dares, so his behavior won’t stand out. Mini is a furry little pig monster in the 3rd grade. Her family moved to Snowdin when her father lost his job in Waterfall. Now he does lumberjacking and to keep up ends meet, Mini’s mom also takes any side jobs that come along from babysitting to lending a hand at the sawmill. Mini feels bad for her parents having to work so hard, so tries to lay low at school and keep to herself. It makes her come off as anti-social, so she has been picked on quite a bit, but figures if she just waits it out they’ll move on to someone else. She usually sneaks out during lunch to eat in private to avoid bullies and read. Her older brother Husky is in 5th grade, but is very social and pretends that they aren’t related. Albert is a real d-lister. I based his design on those mythical owl creatures with antlers. Albert is a 5th grade student that skipped two years. He is the top student at school and fully intends to grow up and be the royal scientist. Despite his academic work, socially Albert is an a-hole. He doesn’t like other kids and only pretends to like adults. The worst is when another kid shows promise or has something he wants. Albert can’t stand anyone to be better off than him.

Characters created by @barsom-fearce-art. Artist commentary below:

Moth is sort of mean and doesn't know how to act and is protective of her brother, Josiph. Josiph is kind but really shy and quiet. Chris is friendly but never seems to talk

Character created by @fivedragonsstudiosart . Artist chose not to include commentary.

Character created by @sproutdraws . Artist commentary below:

My Principal design for the monster oc contest! He��s sort of yeti based, he basically a big fluffy teddy bear who loves children.

Mr. Yin and Mr. Yang created by @afanofalltrades. Artist commentary below:

This is my Principal(s) Entry for the Contest! Mr. Yin and Mr. Yang! You’re probably wondering what they are. They are a species of monster I made up inspired by drama masks known as Dramasks. Yin and Yang are a result of a rare courting of a Black Dramask and a White Dramask. As you may have noticed, they are conjoined twin brothers. They cannot change facial expressions. Their disciplinary choice usually goes down like a good cop bad cop scenario, and they end up butting heads a lot. Mr. Yin is the impatient and hot-headed Left Brain, while Mr.Yang is the more relaxed and peaceful attituded Right Brain. While their relationship may appear to be dysfunctional to most people, they balance each other out to form a stable codependency. This monster also has a carapace around their whole body.

Teacher Pedi, Karl, and Principal Rock created by @octocookies . Artist chose not to include commentary.

Pedi is rather shy in front of other people but somehow manages to be normal and more open in front of kids! They are also quite clumsy and inside their head there is just a huge mess sometimes. After every sentence they say "coo!" Karl is just the invisible random nerd that likes to focus on the lesson. People tend to forget about him because he's kinds drowning between all the others. When he's nervous he stutters a lot. Principal Rock isn't much of a talker. He's cold and hard. He likes Rock.

En, Miss Winnie, and Mr. Glub created by @aivarobinson . Artist chose not to include commentary.

Miss Wisp created by @rhiannon-langley. Artist commentary below:

Magic: sound wave bullets, something like )))), smaller on the left than right (like the WiFi logo) She has excellent hearing and can use echolocation. Can use cyan magic (don’t move) Personality: She is very patient and loves helping others learn new things. She enjoys working with children, and gets super excited when students figure out tough problems. She is soft spoken, but can get tough if someone is hurting one of her students.

Character created by @drawer-frisk . Artist chose to not include commentary.

#monster oc contest #bullying arc #reference #the characters are put in the order that they were submitted to me #it has nothing to do with how much i love designs #its in chronological order #tiny-scientists #undertale

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attract-mode-collective · 6 years

Video

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Exactly 79 Photos & Videos Concerning The Game Boy (plus other handhelds)

So... hope you’ve all been following me on Twitter, which is more or less the unofficial new home for Attract Mode. Mostly cuz Tumblr’s days are, alas, numbers, plus I haven’t warmed up to Medium as much as I had hoped to. Though I’ve actually spent the past two months republishing every single post that contains mainline Game Culture Snapshots, so it has remained somewhat useful at least.

Now, for a while there, I had been compiling every single thing tweeted. But because I’m now so damn active on that end… plus I’m busier than ever with other projects… I’m way behind with those digest posts, and the very idea of playing catch up legit gives me anxiety. Yet I have been sharing lots of cool things, which all deserve to be in the blog proper… and because a lot of them are specific to the Game Boy, I figure, why not just focus on that?

Like the above, which is a technique for producing full color photographs via the Game Boy Camera, and yet another thing that I can’t believe hasn’t made the rounds!

Sticking with Game Boy photography, here have a pair of mods that will greatly enhance picture quality. The first involves mounting SLR lens onto a Game Boy Camera (via ekeler.com)...

And the second has one shoving a Game Boy Camera into a SLR itself (via @MaxKriegerVG)...

As someone who was into video games as a kid, and also interested in photography, the Game Boy Camera was the first camera I was able to call my own. Am pretty sure this was the case for others as well?

I also remember seeing this ad in Nickelodeon Magazine (which I would eventually writer for, not too long later) and being absolutely gob smacked (via nintendroid.org)…

Though as much I loved Nintendo brand of FUNtography, I would quickly discover… as did everyone else I also assume… that taking pictures is serious business (via @PolandNintendo)…

Not only did I have a Game Boy Color, but I also had the Game Boy Printer (I still own both, for the record). Unfortunately my snapshots from Link’s Awakening have long since faded, but as with many things, you can find copies online (via gameandgraphics.com)…

Speaking of the world of print, coming soon is a handy guide to Nintendo handy game machine (via miki800.com)…

That one magazine ad featuring Princess Peach catch your eye as well? Well here’s a much better look at it (via suppermariobroth)…

I love handheld gadgets of all kinds, yet some of the popular ones confuse me. Like Hudson’s Shooting Watch; it makes no sense to have a gadget that can detect button presses without a game attached. Guess I’m not alone (via instagram.com/kazzycom)…

A realization I made while sifting through Game Boy related content is how popular the color yellow is with many. Cuz Pokemon? Anyhow, the final post from a blog that specializes in gorgeous photographs of gorgeous hardware, which I just brought up again very recently (via hard-aware)…

How your parents used to trade Pokemans online (via melonjaywalk)…

And no, Game Boys weren't the only things that one could connect to keitais ya know. And yes, Game Boys aren’t the only portables I’ll be showcasing (via anthony10000000)…

I own quite a few VMUs and am always looking to expand my collection… but nothing yellow, sorry. Instead, I want the one covered with dolphins (via anthony10000000)…

So my new favorites artist is Eri Kitamura, and not just cuz she makes pretty looking Game Boys…

She also makes pretty looking girls playing Game Boys (well, this one is technically listening to music)…

Was originally going to post the first thing from Eri that caught my eye, which is a Game Boy with a girl on it, but instead here’s a Game Boy with a girl on it playing a Game Boy…

Time for two more videos from the same individual responsible with the process for producing color photographs at the very top. And it’s what everyone has been waiting… specifically the backlit Game Boy Color mod everyone has been waiting for.

The process is detailed in this two-part video, and here’s the first one (it’s about 50 minutes long cuz spoilers: this shit ain’t easy)…

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And here’s part two, which is ONLY 40-ish minutes long…

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The author of the videos actually has a store, so if the process seems a bit too daunting, you can purchase a pre-modded unit for $250. Actually, this one is $260, cuz of the dual shells. Quite the price tag, yet somehow totally worth it (via instagram.com/esotericmods)…

Now might be a good time to mention how… remember that GBA with the GameCube finish from eBay a few months back? Well, I decided to get the one that resembles a Super Famicom, something I’ve been lusting over for years.

Well, here’s what the aforementioned seller had in his listing…

And this is what I got instead…

Yeah, that green shoulder button is not the right shade. After some complaining, I got the seller to admit that the one in the picture was hand painted; he didn’t know where it get ones that it’s exact color as on a Super Fami controller.

He also had a no refund policy, yet I bitched & moaned enough to warrant an exchange, for another Cube-esque model, one sans the stick. Cuz it’s comparatively boring to look at, here’s a version with the stick…

Again, mine just has the standard d-pad. As for my replacement… the colors of the A & B buttons are not an exact match, once again. But it’s close enough (am mostly just sick of dealing with that guy, aka johnnys_merchandise, whom you should all avoid btw), plus I have started to scour AliExpress for replacements.

BTW, my failure to obtain a modded handheld that channels another form of hardware has me wondering if I should go for something completely different instead (via instagram.com/wakuwakuisland)…

Up in the mountains, flower bloom amongst Game Boys & Game Boy Colors, whereas deep in the forest, you’ll find mushrooms and Game Boy Advances (via pxchinko)…

Some say memories are fuzzy, though for others, they're leafy (via lyosphe)…

I’ve looked all over for tinycartridge's original post, but no luck, so you can all instead have my personal copy of the earthy wallpaper that was shared years ago (and which I still to this very day)...

The Game Boy Micro, DS, and DS Lite are like family, and like siblings, there can the occasional squabble (via benkyo-es)…

@frankcifaldi: When I met this guy in 2003 and he told me he was going to make an extensive fan site about the Supervision, a Taiwanese Game Boy knockoff, I was like "sure dude." 15 years later he actually launched the thing??

Meanwhile, the Game & Watch Perfect Catalogue just came out, with the full low down on all 59 models. BTW, had no idea there were 59 in total until @ionadisco mentioned it…

How Game & Watches were sold in America; I fondly recalls this ad in-between the pages of Amazing/Spectacular/Web of Spider-Man (via suppermariobroth)…

And how Game Boys were sold in Japan, one day one apparently, which would explain this salesperson’s rather perplexed demeanor (via flashbak.com)…

Silly as it sounds, and as silly as he looks, the US version of Firebrand is nonetheless a warm & welcoming face from my childhood (via nintendometro)...

Mario dropping a knowledge bomb (via suppermariobroth)…

Here’s Peach seemingly kicking Toad’s ass in Super Mario Bros Deluxe, which I’ve been meaning to tweet for a while now, but now seems like the right time & place for obvious reasons (via nintendometro)…

A cute comic about someone finally beating a game after ten years, or at least I believe that's the case (you know, language barrier and all; via @desune593)

Sailor Moon seems to enjoy handheld gaming more so than in the arcades (via uglygreenjacket)…

It saddens me that ravages of time is robbing me of my precious memories, including the names of 90s anime, hence why I had to ask on Twitter who exactly is this (answer was Tenchi Muyo; via shxtfased)...

It’s SethEverman, just playing some pokemon blue…

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Speaking of music, it again saddens me that I wasn’t about to make the trip to Japan to catch chiptunes at Square Sounds, and various associated venues. At least @bit_shifter_ took this great snapshot of Glomag at Cyberpunks Osaka…

Meanwhile, here in NYC, we actually still have record stores. And you can grab Josh’s latest release, his first in 12 years(!) at Rough Trade (via bit-shifter)…

Though back to Japan; attended Square Sounds would have also afforded me the chance to check out Tokyo Game Show, where I could have gotten that VMU shaped USB drive that was being sold at the Sega booth (via miki800)…

A few weeks before TGS, there was an earthquake in Japan, in northern island Hokkaido. Many were left without power, but one person was able to keep up with the news, thanks to an old DS peripheral that basically provides bunny ears (via kotaku.com)…

On a semi-related note, here’s someone watching old ECW VHS tapes on their Game Gear (via heavyelectricity)…

Sorry, but the only other thing I have that’s related to Sega’s Master System on the go is this gif from a pizza ranch salad dressing (yikes) commercial, which was cross-promoting Sonic Chaos (via sonicthehedgeblog)...

I have no idea why I'm so amused by this Getty Image of a Neo Geo Pocket that was confiscated at summer camp. Or perhaps no explanation is needed? (via hellomrkearns)…

Speaking of the Great Outdoors, here’s my buddy Steve enjoying some Mario Kart 8 in the middle of a forest (via instagram.com/vitaminsteve)…

And speaking of Mario Kart on the Switch, Bowser seems like a pretty cool dood to have a car trip (via suppermariobroth)…

The Switch is so beloved that people are doing fan art, not for any particular game but the simple the act of playing with it (via annazees)…

Granted, one of the best things about the Switch is all the different ways in which one can play (via kanekoshake)…

If you enjoy your Switch on the go and are looking for a way to store games… and are a diehard Breath of the Wild fan as well… plus if you have access to a 3D printer (via miki800.com)…

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It’s a tribute to Star Wars… games… all of them… featuring Princess Leia focused on her DMG (via deviantart.com/robduenas)...

BTW, do you still have your Game Boy? If not, here ya go (via anthony10000000)…

When the realization hits that your Game Boy Color library is incomplete (via @Bootleg_Stuff)…

Back to my buddy Steve, who visited the Primark at the Staten Island mall and took pics of the game related apparel that, sadly, were no longer in stock by the time I was able to swing by. With the one thing I really wanted being this shirt…

This pair of Super Mario Land X Air Jordans is only $1,350.00 (via miki800.com)…

I’m sure you’ve seen him already, but for the sake of completion, here’s that grandpa from who rigged this bike with 11 phones to become a Pokemon Go master (via bbc.com)…

Yet another sign of our times, literally (via fuckdragonballz)…

This image features a PSP and a MacBook, both of which are from the mid-2000s, yet feels very late 1990s/early 2000s. Why? Those USB cables (via jcgraphix)…

And last but not least, here’s Paris Hilton with her DS in 2005 (via @ParisHilton)…

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eenefangirlanalysis · 6 years

Text

The episode begins with a classroom exploding!

Pick an Ed was the sixth episode to take place in the school.

The school season was not a favorite among fans. It wasn’t my favorite either for some time. After a while it grew on me. There is a story that the writers follow through each episode. And the seasons echos through the movie. The Eds have not been okay for a while. So the fight isn’t out of the blue in Big Picture Show. It’s been coming on for a while.

From the start of the school season the Eds are immediately put against one another in Mission Ed Possible where Edd was going to personally hand deliver Ed and Eddy’s terrible report cards to their parents.

The kids are even more tough on the Eds. They still don’t understand their friendship. When the notice the Eds fighting they tend to egg it on.

Freedom was a huge theme in the first four seasons. Even when there are episodes that take place out from the school you can still feel the vibe that they’re trapped now a new school year has started.

As I discussed in a recent question I answered each Ed is notably different. Or they’re flanderized. Ed is dumbed down, Edd is arrogant, snarky and acts as if he doesn’t care about his friends, while Eddy is more angry and selfish.

They each have varying opinions about school.

I have a theory that Edd was once homeschooled until fourth grade. In canon, the cul-de-sac kids are in sixth grade. School is Edd’s safe place while he was more vulnerable in the summer. Season 1-4 was the first summer the Eds hung out as friends. In the flashback scene from when the Eds first met as kids Edd had social skills beyond his years for a five year old. But, then they diminished and he hardly says a word, or takes charge in season 1.

Regaining the social skills that he lost and feeling more confident Edd believes he can guide himself. But, then he learns he can’t live without Ed and Eddy. Eddy has guided him.

As for Eddy’s behavior we know that Eddy’s brother has had a history through the Peach Creek school system. If his report card changing kit is enough evidence I don’t what is. The teachers automatically distrust Eddy. Eddy didn’t even fight against anyone when he was given detention for the zillion photo copies that were made of his school photo. Did Eddy even try? Or did he know it was worthless? Sad.

As for Ed there is a theory that he has a skull fracture which was never properly tended to by a doctor. It might be defecting his mentality. He’s also very depended on Edd and Eddy who guide him. They start to pay less attention to Ed.

Sorry, I don’t mean to go on rants but that was analyzing is for.

Onwards!

Kevin and Jonny exit the room quite disgusted. Their clothes are dirty.

It’s rare whenever Jonny is angry at anyone. He claims that he’s peace loving and yet he kicked Edd in the shin in Tag Yer Ed.

A rather proud Eddy, sporting a Bro chin, exits the room with an irate Edd in tow.

Eddy could care less about the detention, crumpling up the slip, while Edd rants that this is yet another detention for he and Eddy.

I thought you never had a detention before, Edd. That’s what you revealed in Hanky Panky Hullabaloo. That special was made before season 5 ever aired. Was Edd just trying to make up an excuse to get himself out?

I wonder how many detentions he and Eddy have had since the start of the new school year? By the way of Edd’s reaction it makes me think they never got much in past school years. Again, Edd was not close friends with Ed and Eddy yet.

School has also made Edd question his friendship. Is it worth being friends with two people who aren’t smart like him and also get him into trouble? Edd was very close to walking away from his friendship when he realized how important Ed and Eddy are are to him.

School has always been where Edd thrived. Since returning to the new year Edd is faced with a challenge. Is school first? Or his friends?

I also really like the directing and storyboarding in this scene.

Oh and also notice the sign? ‘No Rough Housing: We Don’t Want a Law Suit

THEORY: What if Bro has caused so much trouble in the past that an angry parent did sue the school giving it a bad reputation!

Eddy already has a bad reputation that he can’t escape.

But, is Eddy copy Bro’s history? Does he believe rebeling is worth it? Or is it worth trying to be a good student knowing that ‘Terrible Terrel McGee’ had a dark legacy. That’s @camriko-arts name for Eddy’s Brother. It fits well!

“It's all fun and games until academic grades fall, mister!"

Hmm, maybe Edd’s grades are not so good for the first time.

Eddy just throws the crumpled detention slip in Edd’s face to get him to shut up.

And then Eddy painfully pinches Edd’s cheek while telling him that getting detention builds character.

Yeah, we all know who Eddy has heard this from. It’s like his final line in the first episode. “A little childhood trauma builds character.”

I also like how the Eds are drawn to small when they’re in school. The school overpowers them while they feel bigger in the cul-de-sac.

Oof, look at that glare. Edd is done with Eddy.

I feel that the series is also about Edd and Eddy’s blooming friendship/relationship. They were still connecting in season 1. Over time they learn how to live with each others behaviors or quirks. Season 5-BPS was the downfall in their friendship. There is tension between them and they’re put against each other.

Edd and Eddy’s friendship is important. They can’t live without each other. If It was so furious with Eddy why didn’t he leave? He was to going to in Big Picture Show. Eddy tests him. Edd also opens up more. Eddy makes him think about the facts and also listen.

As Edd and Eddy continue down the hall arguing, Ed walks by also holding a detention slip.

Not just Edd and Eddy get detention! So did Ed! Why did Edd state that only he and Eddy had a detention? See they leave out Ed.

Great direction with Edd and Eddy exiting the scene while Ed makes a discovery.

There are so many easy to miss background moments in this show. Look at the bulletin board!

A New Janitor! [GASP!] Remember when Nazz had a petition for cuter guys as janitors in the episode previous?!?! I HAVE NEVER NOTICED THAT!

A paper for a volunteer.

A notice for ‘Peach Creek Salmon Watching’

Something is lost. We’ll see the lost and found momentarily.

Sign ups for a math tutor. I wonder if this is Edd. He’s Eddy’s math tutor in The Eds are Comin’.

And... school photos. The foreshadowing of the dreaded episode.

Edd continues to argue with Eddy hovering the detention slip right over Eddy.

Eddy has no respect for the teacher Edd states that the teacher had every right to be angry considering that the electrical rewiring will take weeks.

Edd respects authority. Because he has to. He respects his parents who don’t fully give that to him. Edd believes that if he is a good student for teachers or the principal they’ll look at him differently then how his parents think about Edd. That’s another reason why he may want to leave his friendship with Ed and Eddy behind.

I also like how in season 5 you get the vibe that the adults are there more. A teacher signed off on his detention slip. In seasons past they were free from adults, mostly. Here they’re surrounded and they have to stick to routine made for them.

I like this Eddy look. It’s the real Eddy for a second. He doesn’t like close proximity.

Eddy just smacks Edd right in the back. Uncalled for and I’m only assuming that Eddy is trying to have fun. He missed summer where he can just hang out with his friends and have no worries.

Although the Eds only played like kids in season 1-2. They did have their kids moments but the scams took over.

He pulls Edd into a forceful laugh trying to laugh it out.

Eddy knows that their friendship is dwindling. He’s trying to make it better. But he doesn’t know how seeing how he never had the best example of friendship. Depending if Bro had friends of his own it’s up to head canons how you think they got along.

Yeah, how is that not EddEddy?

He keeps talking about the incident in the science room. “You should have seen the look on your face, sockhead.”

Ed also joins in. He steals Eddy’s run!

Edd’s just looking at Ed as if he’s come from another planet. He’s really gotten out of the loop.

Edd and Eddy’s fights worry Ed.

Ed is the glue that keeps Edd and Eddy together! He’s scared of their friendship one day falling apart. They’re the only friends that Ed has. He’s making them all hug it out to remember the good times. Ed may always look happy but he’s struggling on the inside.

Here’s one of those screenshots where you have to guess what’s going on if you’ve never seen the show.

Ed looks really sassy.

“And did you see the look on Ed's face? I almost wet my eyebrow, guys! Chump here sure knows funny, boy!"

You get a pretty good vibe of the Eds rocky friendship.

No friendship is perfect. That’s a good lesson in this series.

Wait, what did Ed just call Eddy?

#ed edd n eddy #eene #Eddy Appreciation Month #Pick an Ed #eene season 5 #Ed #Edd #Eddy #eene friendship #eene analysis #character analysis #EddEddy #eene head canons #ed edd n eddy big picture show #every which way but ed #tight end ed #Nazz #Cool Hand Ed #Eddy's Brother

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janethepegasus · 6 years

Text

BMC Miraculous Ladybug AU RP Thing: RPG

An RP me and @pika-ace did relating to the BMC Miraculous Ladybug AU, where our main seven go through an RPG world thanks to an akuma named Queen Alexia.

(The main seven enter an empty warehouse, looking around for the Akuma) Leo: Okay, that weird queen lady has GOT to be here somewhere! (They look around until Owl spots a TV with an NES sitting on a box)

Owl: What's this? Hound: Ooooh retro!

(They approach the TV and it turned on by itself)

Leo: Ooooh. :o

(It showed static at first, but then it showed a title screen for an RPG game called "Miraculous Quest")

Swan: A game? Hound: I like the sound of this already :3c

(Suddenly, two hands emerge out of the screen and grabs the main seven)

Dasher: AHH!! Leo: Holy shit we're being Jumanji'd!!!

(The hands dragged them and into the TV) (Then there was a bright flash of light) (A couple of seconds later, the main seven, who are now their normal selves, stir) Jeremy: Owwww.....

Michael: Aw man...ow... Eric: *winces* Everyone alright?

Post: Yeah...!

Jordan: Shit...we changed back...? Why?

???: Because you're in my RPG game of course! :3

(They all look up to see the akuma, standing on a large rock over them)

Queen Alexia: And you seven are gonna go through the WHOLE thing! From beginning to end! >:3

Jeremy: Holy shit, we actually WERE Jumanji'd!

Queen Alexia: Well, not “Jumanji’d” but rather....you all became an RPG class! (They look over themselves and saw that Jeremy is a Fighter, Michael is an Archer, Eric is a Mage, Jordan is a Knight, Post is a healer, Lin is a Rouge/Thief, and Joe is a Mage)

Michael: ...I am strangely excited about this 8)c

Jeremy: Me too! 8)c

Jordan: *looks at his armor* I don't think we covered this during our game nights...

Post: I-I'm a healer...? M-Makes sense... :/

Joe: *to Eric* It seems you and I are...spell casters?

Eric: *to Joe* Seems like it...

Lin: I'm digging this hood and the black...I feel very edgy

Michael: But don't get TOO edgy Lin! X3c Queen Alexia: AAAAANYWAY, now that you all saw that you're in your RPG classes, let me explain a few rules...

Jeremy: Oh, I am READY for this! :D Michael: Same; I am ON BOARD!

Queen Alexia: First off, your Miraculous, they're not taken, yet, but you cannot use them at a lower level, you have to unlock the ability at a certain level! Wanna take a few guesses on what Level you unlock it? :3c

Post: uhh...10?

Queen Alexia: Nope! 35! :3c

Michael: WHAT?! D:< Jeremy: That's BS! >:(

Queen Alexia: Hey! I can't have rookie players in my game gain access to a powerful ability from the start! It would make things too easy! >:(

(Jeremy and Michael groan)

Queen Alexia: Second, you all have three lives! If you run out of HP, you loose a life! But if you loose all three lives, then you'll die both in game and in real life! >:)

(Everyone tenses) Post: Oh god...we've been sword art online'd too?!

Queen Alexia: Well not quite but, it'll seem that way if you loose your last life! ;)

Lin: In hindsight, we kinda asked for this when we asked Raven Claw to up his game...

Joe: Yes, now we ALL have to pay the price...

Queen Alexia: Also, all of you start at Level 1! So if you wanna beat the final boss, you gotta farm those EXP from battles! >:3

Michael: Oh, lovely >:(

Queen Alexia: Good luck! >:3 *disappears*

Jeremy: Welp, looks like we get to live the DnD cartoon

Post and Jordan: The what? :/c

Michael: The old cartoon based on Dungeons and Dragons.

Post: .....Never heard of it. :/c

Jeremy: We'll educate you later; right now, we better build up our EXP

Michael: Yeah! >:)

Eric: And how exactly do we do that? Jeremy: Beat the shit out of enemies of course!

Michael: Yeah! Beat em up and gain EXP! That's basically what makes an RPG.....an RPG!

Jordan: *looks completely lost* Uhhhh... Michael: You’ll get the hang of it

Joe: Well then, shall we start our quest? :)

Post: Y-Yeah! Jeremy: Onward!

(They begin their journey through the RPG land)

(Jeremy and Michael take the lead, being more experienced in RPGs)

(While the others are behind them) (After a couple of minutes, they encountered their first monster)

Jeremy: Ooooh boy, here we go!! Let's see what we can do!

(They get into position to fight)

Jordan: So how does this work exactly?! Michael: Just attack, like we usually do in the real world, dad, it's not hard!

Lin: Sooo....beat it up until it’s dead? :/c

Jeremy: Exactly!

Joe: Alright then, it may take some time to learn our new powers but we’ll manage!

Michael: I'll go first; my thing is pretty straight forward *gets his bow and arrows* Though I wish we took archery in gym class...

(He aims his arrow and releases it towards the monster)

(The arrow hits and the monster staggers a bit)

Michael: Woo! Did it on the first try! :D

Jeremy: Okay, I'll go next; I'm a fighter, soooo I guess I'll just punch him

(He approaches the monster and punches it)

(The monster staggers and Jeremy again and Jeremy leaps back to his position) Post: Heh, this is pretty easy! Jeremy: Well this IS a level one monster

Michael: Yeah, cause if we go into the later levels, they’ll get harder to beat!

Post: I'll go next but...I'm a Healer. Can I even attack?

Michael: Eeeeeehhhhh......kinda? :/

Jeremy: Give it a try, just...don't heal him

Post: O-Okay... (Post walks up to the monster and hits it with the stick end of his healing staff)

(The monster staggers again) Michael: There ya go!

Post: Yay! :D

Eric: Um, is there a reason this thing isn't fighting back? Jeremy: We all gotta take turns; once we all go, then he can go

Eric: .....Are you serious? -_-

Jeremy: Yep, that's how it works; be glad we're not in an MMO or else it'd be a free for all

Michael: Yeah!

Jordan: What the hell is an MMO?????! Michael: Later, dad, it's your turn, slash the monster or something!

Jordan: A-Alright then!

(Jordan gets out his sword and slashes at the monster)

(The monster staggers again, looking like it was gonna faint)

Jeremy: Almost there! Who's gonna take the finishing blow?

Joe: I will!

Joe: Now, if I'm a Mage then I suppose I can just... (He forms a spell in his hands and fires it at the monster)

(The monster falls and is defeated)

Michael: Woo! Victory!

Jeremy: Yeah!! :D

Post: So have we leveled up now? Michael: Oh, if only it were that easy

Post: Huh?

Jeremy: It takes a LOT of EXP to level up, and beating one monster isn't gonna be enough; we gotta beat up more.

Eric: .....Are you fucking serious? >:/

Michael: 'Fraid so, man.

(Eric sighs in annoyance)

Jeremy: Speaking of, we should probably look for GROUPS of monsters to fight to speed things up; Eric probably got barely any EXP since he didn't get to attack

Michael: Yeah, if we wanna best the final boss TOGETHER, we gotta be strong enough to both survive and win this thing!

Jordan: This is too much for my brain to handle...

Lin: You’ll get the hang of it eventually Tank! ;)

(They head on their way, fighting as many monsters as they can)

(They spent an hour or so fighting monsters and leveling up) (When they got to the entrance of a forest level, they were suddenly approached by a man in a long cloak) Magic Seller: Hello weary travelers!

Jeremy: Uh, hey

Magic Seller: Would you care to buy *quickly pulls out a potion* some of these??? :3c

Michael: *squints* What does it do?

Magic Seller: It makes you go fast *pause* Like Sonic the Bloody Hedgehog

Jeremy: Oh well in that case :D

(Jeremy takes the magic potion from the magic seller’s hands)

Eric: Are you sure about this? Michael: This is part of the game dude; you gotta get potions and junk

Jeremy: Yeah!

(They buy a few more potions)

Michael: Thanks for the potions man! :D Magic Seller: Ya welcome kid!

(They head on their way through the forest)

(They fought a few monsters as they went but all of the sudden, they felt the ground shake a little)

Jordan: What's that?!

(The shaking fades out and comes back, as if something big and heavy was coming towards them)

Jeremy: If Jurassic Park has taught us anything...that can't be a good sign...

(The stomping becomes louder and louder until a giant moving tree with large arms and a face comes into view)

Michael: Ooooh...goooood...

(The giant tree monster looks at them and roars loudly, then it starts charging towards them)

Joe: MOVE!!

(They run as fast as they can to get away from the tree monster)

(The monster chases them for a while, until it reaches out with one of its branches and grabs Eric)

Jordan: PEACH!!

(Everyone skids to a halt; Eric struggles and tries hitting it with magic, but they barely do anything, and the monster keeps his tight grip on him)

(Eric screams in pain as the monster tightens his hold on him)

(The monster roars and starts stomping away with Eric) Jeremy: Get back here, Treebeard!!

(They chase after the tree monster)

Post: Why aren't we doing the usual thing where it stays still and fights us?! Michael: This must be a cutscene or something!!

Jordan: A What?!

Jeremy: You know, like when those video scenes play in other games to move the story!

Jordan: *blinks* Oh, right.

Michael: Yeah; this must be a boss if he's getting a cutscene!

Lin: Then let’s follow him and beat that guy! >:)

Jordan: No need to tell me twice! >:(

(They chase after the monster)

(They eventually reach a forest clearing; the monster is waiting, and Eric is dangling from another tree, tied up with tree roots)

Jordan: Will!

Eric: Jordan!

(The monster roars at the six, getting ready for battle)

Post: Okay, NOW it's doing the thing.. Michael: Be careful, this is a boss, he's gonna be tough!

Jeremy: Yeah!

(They start fighting)

janethepegasus (They gave it all they got on their turn, while they try to dodge the monster’s attacks on its turn. This goes on for a couple of rounds) (Eventually, they were still holding on but Jordan had it rough, he was just a couple HP points away from losing his first life)

Eric: Jordan! Jeremy: Post, can you heal him on your next turn? Post: I....I don't have enough magic!!

Jeremy: Crap! He’s gonna loose his first life if he gets hit!

Michael: I...I guess we just hope the monster decides to hit one of us instead

Jeremy: I hope...

(They finish their turns and the monster takes its turn to attack)

(It raises its large arms and slams them down at Jordan)

Eric: NO!!!!

(It lands and the monster picks up Jordan, and then it throws him straight into the ground) (When Jordan landed, he looked like a bloody mess)

Eric: *struggling while tearing up* JORDAN!!! Michael: Holy fuck...!

(The monster finishes it’s turn and now it was their turn to attack)

Eric: *nearly crying* No...no, Jordan...! Joe: *angrily* You BASTARD!! (They take their turns, hitting the monster with their strongest attacks)

(Once their attacks hit on their turn, they managed to defeat the tree monster)

(The roots around Eric disappear and he falls to the ground, and everyone looks at Jordan's remains)

Jeremy: Holy fuck... (Eric manages to get up and race towards Jordan)

(Eric kneels next to him, tears falling and his hands shaking) Eric: Oh god...Jordan...no...please, please no...!

(Eric bursts into tears as he’s next to Jordan)

(Everyone else tears up at the sight, when Jordan's body starts to disappear)

Eric: *sobbing* No..! No no no no, please...Jordan...DON’T LEAVE ME!!!

(Jordan's body vanishes and a spotlight shines down from the sky; a few seconds later, Jordan is literally dropped right back into the world, falling on his face) Everyone: HUH?! Jordan: OW! FUCK, that hurt!!

Eric: *looks up* Jordan?!

(Jordan gets onto all fours and looks around at the scene) Jordan: Huh? Did we win?

Jeremy: Uhh....yeah we did.

Jordan: Oh... *sees everyone looking shocked* Uh, did I miss something? Eric: JORDAN!! *runs over and just about tackles him, tears running down his face*

Jordan: Woah! You okay there Peach?

Eric: You're alive...oh thank GOD you're alive!!

Jordan: Wh-What?? D-Did....Did I die?!

Michael: Y-Yeah...that tree just about made fertilizer out of you... Eric: I thought I'd lost you, I...god I was so scared, Jordan...!

Jordan: Oh Will.... *hugs Eric*

Post: But, how did you...oh...right...I forgot...

Lin: Oh yeah, the lifes thing....riiiiiight...

Michael: Wow...guess the adrenaline made us forget...

Jeremy: Yeah....

Joe: So that means Jordan has two lives left; now I see that we have to save as many as possible; three lives isn't a lot

Jeremy: Yeah, cause if we lost all three, we’re dead, like....for real.

Michael: And that was only the first boss...oh boy...

Post: Yeah...

(Eric and Jordan stand up, Eric still clinging to Jordan)

Jordan: You gonna be okay Peach...?

Eric: I...I think so...

Jordan: *wipes Eric's tears* Good...

Eric: Just...stay alive...please...

Jordan: I will, promise...

(Jordan kisses him on the forehead)

(Eric smiles)

Joe: Well then...shall we continue? Lin: Yeah, let's get out of this place...

(They walk forward and continue on their journey)

(They travel through many levels, slowly getting stronger as they go, but still having quite a few close calls as the fights get tougher)

(During one fight against a tough monster, Joe and Lin were trying their best not to get hit again, as they didn't want to loose their remaining HP with one hit)

Michael: Get ready!! (The monster roars and attacks Joe, and he falls down dead)

Everyone: JOE!!!!

Jordan: DAMMIT!! (They take their turns and attack as hard as they can, trying to end the fight quickly)

(As soon as the monster disappears, everyone rushes over to Joe)

Post: Dad!! Oh god dad, no!

Eric: Joe.....

(Joe's body disappears and he's then dropped back into the world)

(He falls on his back)

(Joe slowly gets up and looks around) Joe: Well, that was a bizarre experience... Post: DAD!

(Post hugs Joe tightly)

Lin: Well we made it THIS far without anyone losing a life; I'd call that progress

Jeremy: Yeah; hopefully we reach the final boss pretty soon...

Michael: What level are we on now? I think I've kinda been losing track, I think we're...in the twenties?

Joe: I believe so...

Eric: I guess we'll just have to keep going until the akuma tells us to stop

Jeremy: Yeah, pretty much.

(They get up and keep on going)

(They kept on going, fighting a lot of monsters as they went, getting stronger and managing to keep their lives. Until finally, the main seven reached Level 35, where they unlocked the ability to use their Miraculous)

Eric: FINALLY!!

Jeremy: Yeah! It took us a couple of hours just to get there!

Michael: Oh this'll make fighting WAY more fun! >:3

Lin: Hell yeah! >:3

Post: Onward! To the next fight! >:3

(They move on forward)

(They keep climbing the levels, their Miraculous abilities helping immensely in fights)

(Eventually, after many battles against monsters and bosses, they finally reached the final level, standing in front of the gates of a large castle)

Jordan: Oh thank god it's almost over... Eric: How are we doing on lives?

Jordan, Joe, and Lin: Two Michael and Jeremy: We got three!

Jeremy: How about you, Post?

Post: Um....I-I-I....i got one left.... :(

Michael: Oh fuck... Jordan: And...Will? How about you?

Eric: Two.

Jeremy: Okay...okay, so we just gotta watch Post's health more than anything

Michael: We don't wanna loose our precious baby! XS

Post: 'M not a baby... >:(

Jeremy: You are in our eyes! Michael: You precious cinnamon roll!

Joe: They're not wrong, son ;)

Post: T-True...

Jordan: Welp...let's go de-throne this Queen

Michael: Hell yeah, let's do this!

(They enter the final level and start slowly working their way up)

(Eventually, they managed to make their way to the top, where Queen Alexia is sitting on her throne)

Alexia: You finally made it...and with your whole party! Impressive!

Jeremy: Yeah, it was hard, but we fucking made it!

Michael: And now we're taking you down!! Alexia: Figures, the ones will ALL their lives are the ones running the show; you two have CLEARLY played RPGs before

Jeremy: Well DUH! >:(

Michael: Also, dropping our rookie friends into this with semi-perma-death? Not cool, lady! >:(

Queen Alexia: It's an RPG, they should've known better! ;)

Jeremy: Not everyone's a fan of RPGs, lady!! Michael: And not everyone are gamers!! Some people don't even know what RPGs are!!

Queen Alexia: *scoffs* Whatever. Anyway, you get the face the final boss to this game, me! So get ready cause i won't hold anything back! >:)

(They get into position and the fight begins)

(Both sides gave it all they got, landing powerful attacks) (However, during Alexia's turn, she tries a powerful attack at Jordan) (It hits and he's knocked out)

Eric: JORDAN!! Jeremy: It's okay, he's still got a little health left and two lives!

(Jordan struggles to get up)

Michael: Post! Give her a status spell! Stun her so we can get some extra hits in!

Post: O-Okay!

(Post hits Alexia with a stunning spell and she can't move for two turns)

Jeremy: Alright! Now we can get our extra hit! >:)

Jeremy: Don't hit her with the ultra big ones yet, we gotta save magic energy!

Eric: Right!

(They all hit her with decently powerful attacks and get a good chunk of her health down to almost red)

Michael: Almost there!

Jeremy: Alright, Post, you heal the party including yourself in case this somehow goes wrong! Michael: Everyone else, time for the big guns!

Lin: Hell yeah, let's do this! >:)

(They all use their Miraculous abilities and use their biggest spells and Alexia's health drops to zero)

All: YEAH!!!

(Alexia falls over and their levels skyrocket due to all the EXP) Michael: Ahhh that's the best feeling in the world! X3c

Jeremy: Hell yeah it does! X3c

(Eric walks up to Alexia's fallen form and gets her akuma) Eric: That was QUITE the payoff, I must say

Jordan: Yeah, it was rough going through the whole thing, but we did it!

Joe: That was a VERY satisfying journey...and I think we owe it all to you, Jeremy and Michael. Without your leadership and expertise...I don't think any of us would have made it out

Post: Yeah... Lin: Thanks for your knowledge of the genre Mikey! <3

Jordan: I didn't think you had in ya; you two may not know it, but you're born leaders

(Jeremy and Michael blush) Jeremy: Thanks guys

Michael: Never thought we'd be leading the victory charge through a giant RPG

Jeremy: Me neither. Yet here we are.

Eric: Perhaps during our next game night...we could play more RPGs, just without the threat of dying

Joe: Yes, i'm a bit interested in seeing more RPG worlds and see what they have in store for all of us.

Post: And working together like that was a lot of fun!

Lin: It was! <3

Jeremy: Hell yeah, that'd be awesome! Michael: It's a deal!

Jeremy: Next game night, more RPGs! <3

Michael: Yeah! Now let's get the hell out of here!

Eric: Right!

(Eric breaks the akuma and purifies it, and they're back in the warehouse)

Post: We're back! :D

Joe: Thank goodness

Michael: Yeah...

Jeremy: C'mon Michael; let's go home and try to narrow down which RPG we'll play first at the next game night! :Dc

Michael: Yeah! We gotta pick a GOOD one to play! :Dc

Eric: We're looking forward to it :)

Jeremy: Great! <3

#bmc miraculous ladybug au #bmc au #squip #jeremy heere #michael mell #Jordan Ellis #joe iconis #post the Squip #lin manuel miranda #rpg

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callunavulgari · 6 years

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TOP 25 FICS OF 2017

1. A Somaal Universe by @kaikamahine | Steven Universe | 7.5k

Connie flips over the next card. “'Most likely to -’” She reads out loud, and then dissolves into laughter and has to start over, propping the card up on her bump. “'Most likely to freak out when you go into labor and break the speed limit getting to the hospital?’”

“Pearl,” Amethyst and Jasper say in unison.

Heather Says: It was really difficult to choose between this and Favor For Your Four-Chambered Heart as favorite Elizabeth fic for the year, but in the end this one won out because it was one of the first fics this year that made me well and truly happy.

2. The home front by aesc | Stargate Atlantis | 10k

“This had better be the Sheppard residence,” Rodney says, brilliant, agitated life and volume against a monotonous day and Dave’s subdued welcome, “because I’ve been driving around for hours and if I ever find the woman who did the voice on my GPS system I’m going to personally amputate her vocal cords.”

Heather Says: I read this in the pool, precariously balanced on the top step with my body angled weirdly so that I wasn’t holding my phone over the water. I started it before I got in the pool, of course, but I couldn’t put it on hold long enough to swim, so I finished it in the water.

3. Junk Cheap by DevilDoll | Stargate Atlantis | 13.5k

If you were thinking you’d love to read an AU where Rodney is a college professor and John owns a junk shop, this is the story for you.

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4. Unidentified by fiercelydreamed | Stargate Atlantis | 30k

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Heather Says: I’m not typically one for the amnesia trope. I’ve found some good fic for it, but most of the time either the angst or the second-hand embarrassment gets me too hard and I end up exiting out of the fic. This fic was intricate and engaging and introduces a Rodney just off-center from the Rodney that we know.

5. Black Helicopters at Dawn by whizzy | Stargate Atlantis | 240k

Screw the bet. Rodney was going to prove the existence of extraterrestrial intelligence. Oh, and incidentally, he might just catch the United States Air Force with their pants around their ankles.

Heather Says: This fic is long. And beautiful, and sad, and kind of a lot. Also if you’re like me you’ll have to find the third part of it on some weird, sort of sketchy website that hopefully didn’t give you viruses. Or if you’re really desperate you can ask me to send you a copy since I think I still have it somewhere.

6. Like a Lightning Strike by miss_aphelion | Hannibal | 71k

In a world where omegas are instant celebrities and treated like royalty, Will just wants to be left alone. So he keeps what he is a secret, managing to avoid the spotlight and the restrictions that come with it for nearly twenty years.

Then a case goes wrong, and his secrets start to unravel before the entire world—and even more worrying, it happens in front of Hannibal, the alpha that was already fascinated with him before he knew what he was.

Heather Says: Okay, so remember how I said I wasn’t crazy about the amnesia trope? I am really not crazy about the A/B/O trope. Done well enough it’s intriguing, but I read a really awful one way back in the day that basically scarred me for life. That said, this fic came along and hooked me hard. It hasn’t been updated since April, which is disappointing, but it’s well worth the read, even unfinished.

7. Lord, Save Me from Your Followers by anamatics | Supergirl | 27k

Kara, perhaps out of a want for thoroughness in her story, perhaps out of a Millennial-born urge to creep on a the social media of a woman she finds intriguing, discovers that Lena Luthor has a pretty active following on Instagram one afternoon not long after their first meeting. She debates it, just for a moment, before following Lena.

Heather Says: Don’t watch Supergirl? That’s fine! Technically I’ve only seen a couple episodes myself! Read this anyway! This fic has that perfect realness to it that I’ve only found in a very select group of fics and it has cute girls kissing to boot.

8. hood & glove by @fahye | Yuri On Ice | 12k

“I don’t mess with the fae,” Otabek says.

"I'm not asking you to mess with them," JJ flat-out lies.

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9. With Fire in Their Eyes by @asukaskerian | Yuri On Ice | 8k

He lands butterfly-light in a swirl of hair and glittering gauze, and the ceiling crashes to the rink all around him.

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Not applause. Screams. The light is wrong because a fourth of the ceiling projectors are missing. The sky is dark. No stars. Something gleams behind the broken sky. And moves. Something he can't -- won't -- something.

Something that's looking at him.

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10. What We Pretend We Can’t See by @gyzym | Harry Potter | 131 k

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12. Slithering by @astolat | Harry Potter | 27k

Draco found the nest down in the Manor’s cellars, while he was clearing them out.

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14. the king of oak by @picqueries | Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them | 38k

The first thing Percival Graves does after being released back into the world is buy a new wand. He's at Greymalkin's for ten minutes and the only wand that works for him is raw aspen, whiter than bone and so rough that Graves gives himself a splinter conjuring a storm of birds. The wand—dragon heartstring, a most unusual wand for an American wizard, according to a flustered Greymalkin—feels wild, and Graves empties half his wallet on the counter and keeps his hand on his new wand all the way home.

The second thing he does is quit his job, because honestly.

("Grindelwald did his research before he put on your face," Seraphina says reasonably. "And it's not like you're open with your personal life. He has us all fooled."

"He wore scorpion stickpins!" Graves shoots back, somewhat less reasonably.

Seraphina looks at Graves, his pressed creases, his immaculate shirt, the red ruby cufflinks he's wearing to hide the starved brittleness of his wrists. "I'm sorry," she says. It is not enough to make him stay.)

The third thing he does is get jumped by Credence Barebone in an alley.

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18. where the weeds take root by @beenghosting | Supernatural | 30k

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19. Heart and Home by lc2l | Les Mis | 97k

In an alternate Paris, werewolves occupy the majority of the ruling classes, making and adjusting policy to suit their interests. The punishments for a human attacking a werewolf can be brutal, unless they have the protection of a wolf pack.

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20. World Ain’t Ready by idiopathicsmile | Les Mis | 185k

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Heather Says: The thing about high school AUs that no one ever tells you is that as you grow up, one of two things happens. Either the high school AU in question triggers a massive influx of nostalgia that basically cripples you emotionally or it has you cringing away from the screen, groping blindly until you can ex out of the tab. I’m happy to say that this one is more of the former.

21. despite what you’ve been told by @caseyvalhalla | Yuri On Ice | 14k

When Victor falls, he goes down hard.

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Heather Says: This fic soothed my soul during a particular rough patch this year. There are dates and misunderstandings and some pretty intense UST and it’s just wonderful all around.

23. Watercast by @fishwrites | Voltron | 113k

Shiro has been a Galra prisoner for over a year; with his flight feathers clipped and unable to fly. Desperate to escape, he jumps overboard while being transported to the capitol on a Galran ship. Lance is a merman who saves him from drowning. Keith thinks Shiro is about to become mermaid dinner. Hunk just wants Lance to stop going to the surface all the time, dammit!

Heather Says: When the most recent chapter of this came out, I ended up going back and rereading it, because I was on the beach, and it seemed like a really good time to read about mermen and flying bird people and I am just. So excited for this fic all over again.

24. Fifteen Men in September by ballantine | Black Sails | 34k

Fifteen men on the dead man’s chest Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum! Drink and the devil had done for the rest Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!

A Black Sails origin story for the song.

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25. Patience on a Monument by betts | Game of Thrones | 21k

Having a Jaime in your life means living in a soap opera, except you can’t DVR it to watch later, and the main character sometimes ends up in your guest bedroom for an undisclosed period of time because he has a woefully codependent relationship with his sister.

Heather Says: It’s. So. Good.

#stargate atlantis #steven universe #voltron #harry potter #game of thrones #les mis #yuri on ice #fantastic beasts and where to find them #dishonored #witcher 3 #supernatural #supergirl #hannibal #heather says what #2017 #memes #new year's memes #long post #fuck yeah recs!

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actuallylorelaigilmore · 6 years

Text

the ultimate citation list for Schneider of ODAAT, volume 1

A reference collection of quotes and details, organized chronologically, for the first 26 episodes of One Day At A Time. Used to create this character guide.

“Can you believe it's only been 10 months since you moved in? I remember 'cause I got my five year sober chip and your mom baked me that cake. I enjoyed watching you guys eat it." 1x01

"You're 40 and you look stupid." “I'll have you know, I was invited to several Pride parades." 1x01

Uses a “very expensive” Damascus steel hammer. 1x01

"I've been doing some outreach down at the rec center, talking to at-risk youth. You guys wanna start takin' bets? Actually, scratch that. I'm addicted to gambling.” 1x01

"Love isn't even real. It's just something your nanny says sometimes to your dad." 1x02

"Hey, I may have money in the bank and two living parents, and four living stepmothers but there is a hole in here. We never had family meals. I ate alone in front of the TV. Oh, don't get me wrong. It was a massive TV. Sometimes my nanny would join me, but only if I agreed to watch telenovelas. This one time, Rosa got jealous of the housekeeper 'cause she was makin' a move on her man, so she threatened to throw live scorpions on her while she slept. Rosa was my nanny. Ex-nanny. Now, stepmother." 1x03

[Lydia and Pen fighting] “It's startin' to feel kinda like home in here.” 1x03

Schneider cooks fancy hipster food. "Nutted quinoa, wilted broccolini with radish micro-greens, and venison carpaccio on a bed of nettles. Grab a cedar plank and dig in." 1x04

"Always interesting to be the sober one at a dinner party." 1x05

"I immigrated here illegally. I'm a Canadian. But yeah, born in the 'Couve, overstayed my student visa, forced to live in the shadows of Pepperdine University. Anyway, it's fine now. My lawyers made it all okay." 1x05

Uses sheet masks, knows about chauffeurs, butlers, estates. 1x06

“The kids barely touched my black olive tapenade.” “Thanks for helping out, but maybe next time pick a food a kid would wanna eat or has heard of.” “Yeah, and maybe next time, don't hand out masks with my face on them.” 1x07

"The members of my college band have finally put aside our differences and we're reuniting to play at the fair this afternoon. My band, Full Sail, plays yacht rock. These guys were like family. I used to show up at their dorm rooms unannounced and just hang out for hours and hours and hours." 1x07

"We were setting up for the show and our keytarist threw a decorative anchor at me. This is why Full Sail broke up in the first place. Too many passionate personalities." 1x07

Has a magnifying glass in his costume trunk. 1x07

"I know nothing about my grandparents and I never will. And they live in Pasadena!" (but he goes to 'the depot' in Pasadena) 1x09

"I have never seen such un-professionalism. This is why I don't work!" 1x09

"I need to find a new place to get my eyebrows threaded." 1x10

Has a safe. 1x10

"Well, Father believed it's best to have this kinda discussion in a car because you don't have to make eye contact. Plus, you're traveling in the same direction, which fosters intimacy. So we're in the Bentley with our chauffeur, Paco. Father said it's time to have the talk. We came to the next stoplight. He hopped out, Paco told me everything." 1x10

"I didn't get the period talk till I was 12. Paco just called it 'Shark Week.'" 1x10

"When I was a kid, there was an adult section in the back of the video store. Behind the beads. I'd always chicken out and just rent a Jane Fonda workout tape. Still worked. Still works." 1x10

"You'd be surprised how many of my hookups started with 'Ugh!' ...When I was 15, I told Father I wanted to be a professional tap dancer. He laughed. It was that lack of support that contributed to my drinking and drug problem. Oh, do you find that amusing? Because 15-year-old Schneider's drinking peach schnapps out of an unused tap shoe right now." 1x11

"You have a girl over here and you were offering to have sex with me?" - "Yes, Penelope. That's the kind of friend I am." 1x11

"My dad never came to my games. All he ever did was put me through rehab six times and buy me this building." 2x01

"Maroon 5 is the best." 2x01

"Okay, I decided to take a break from dating. See, I realized that women were just another one of my addictions, like alcohol, drugs, gambling, cigarettes, snow globes. The point is, I've broken the cycle of addiction with spinning. Five hours a day, every single day. I have to do it! Plus, it's the perfect substitute for dating, 'cause it burns a lot of energy and also numbs my junk!" 2x02

“Snow globes? Is this one of our family?” 2x02

"I come over, tell him to do stuff to me, he does it, I go home. You should get one." "I think what Nikki was kinda dancing around is that you don't always have to have a relationship with a capital "R." Sometimes all you need is what the great poets of the Renaissance called a junk buddy." "Exactly. You don't even have to like them." 2x03

"See, the great thing about having a green card is you get to live here without having to do all the stuff Americans have to, like vote or serve jury duty or become obese."

"Okay, but at least you vote in Canadian elections." "Mmm. No. Even in Canada, nothing ever changes. Clean air, sensible gun control, free health care. The system's rigged." 2x04

Can picture himself “doing it” with Elizabeth Warren, was Stephen Hawking for Halloween. 2x04

"You have to pay taxes with a green card? I just texted my accountant, and he said 'cause I'm in the highest income bracket, I don't have to pay taxes." 2x04

Keeps on hand: panic room, gas mask, water purification pills, MREs, enough cash to get to Cape Verde by boat. Followed Max on Instagram. Would be honored to be Penelope's maid of honor. 2x05

"I'm very patriotic. Look in that basket. There's a bald eagle thong." 2x06

All Elena's video game equipment belongs to him. 2x06

"Penelope, tell my third stepmother I loved her! Not the second one, though. She was kind of a jerk." 2x06

"Hummer limo's downstairs. My third stepmother used to take me to the racetrack to spy on Father. For the longest time, I thought she was saying, 'Your father is with Rebecca, that horse!' It's like I'm back at the racetrack with my stepmom. What's next? Throw a mint julep in his face?” 2x07

"I love Cuba! I've been there four times. Property manager, job's just temporary. My father owns the building. I'm really a musician. Play a lot of rap-rock-ska. I'm like a male Gwen Stefani. When you're hiring a nanny, make sure she's not too hot. That's how I met my fifth mom. I had four nannies and look at the results." 2x08

Did not speak a word of Spanish when he first met them, is interested in single moms. 2x08

"If you joined an adult kickball team after saying you were too busy to join mine, you are on a long road to forgiveness." 2x09

"Your idea of stress is when your chest-waxer goes out of town." "Roberto is the only one who doesn't make it sting!" 2x09

"I shouldn't have to need these either, but I do. To see. So it's Fourth of July, 2011. I'd been sober for a while, so I thought I'd celebrate with a beer. Woke up three days later in an alley. Then the bowling ball hit me. I was in the gutter for a long time. It's really slippery without the shoes. That was the day I truly accepted that I can't have alcohol or drugs, ever. Not a beer, not a glass of wine, not even six hits of acid at a Grateful Dead show, no matter how well it makes me dance. I kinda get where you're coming from. There's something I want that I can't have for the rest of my life." 2x09

He and Pen are best friends. Also considers Max his bestie. Wants to Netflix and chill with them both, together. 2x09

"My abuelita used to put Vicodin in her coffee. And her lemonade and her sandwiches. Maybe she had a problem. As my father said to me on my ninth birthday, 'You don't need me anymore.' I use my garage for pickling and sea horse breeding." 2x10

Loves puns. "This is Elena Alvarez, my handyman mentee. Or handy-manatee." "The toilet is a cruel mistress. She is flush with complications." 2x10

"Herb and Sherb McGurb. Her real name is Sheryl, but she gets a kick out of Sherb." 2x10

"Bonsai's for dorks. This is penjing. The gentle Chinese art of tray scenery. Now that you're working for me, I finally have some leisure time." "Oh, look, there's little people. Wait, is that my family?" "Could be any Cuban family." 2x10

"I may only look two or three years older than you, but I have the wisdom of that ancient bonsai!" 2x10

"Always take the lemonade. That's Handyman 101! So you watched Jeopardy with them and then what? Well, now we know what your problem is! You fixed their toilet, but you didn't fix their souls. Elena, growing up, I had everything. But I was always alone. I don't want my tenants to feel that way, so I do more than just fix stuff. Apartment 306, macrame with Mrs. Watson. 201, lose at chess to Mr. Roth. 402, listen to all their Cuban nonsense. That's the job. That's what takes four hours. That's the difference between being a handyman and a super." 2x10

Has heard 'you're fired' a lot. 2x10

"After a grueling 30 minutes of thought, Nikki, will you be my starter wife? You're on the rebound. That's the best time to get married. You don't have time to think. So you were never thinking about me? My emotions? My feelings? You used me, Nikki, Finn's mom! And not in the way I like! And that's not all, Sister Barbara. We knew each other. Biblically. And while we were doing it, she took the Lord's name in vain. A lot!" 2x11

"Last night, I was testing the pH of the water in my seahorse ranch and, as I looked at those vomiting little guys, I realized I suck at tests. All tests. Drug, sobriety, vision, IQ, smog. You name it, I fail it!" 2x12

"Have you ever been arrested?” “Does public nudity at a hockey game count?” “There is, uh, no mention of a public nudity charge in your file.” “Oh, you just go to YouTube and type in 'Zam-boner.'" 2x12

"Yeah, they didn't specifically ask if I got drunk and tried to ride a moose, so after that I was golden." 2x12

"How important is having kids to you?" "Never really thought about it." 2x12

"I'll have you know I babysat my babysitter's kids while she was babysitting my dad, so, yeah, I got a little experience under my belt. Oh, it's my cousin Gordy. He still thinks I'm full-on Canadian. All right, good news is Gordo bought it. Bad news is I'm judging a poutine festival in Saskatoon next week." 2x12

"You're the single greatest mother I know." "Thank you. That means a lot coming from a guy with five moms." 2x12

"Fuzzy Afghan she likes, picture of the Pope, picture of a different Pope, picture of your dad, picture of the family, picture of me with the family, picture of me by a waterfall. I'm just gonna keep talking 'cause I'm not good in crisis situations." 2x13

"It's so crazy how we're both immigrants. I mean, I would never compare my story to yours, but the parallels are spooky. You were 18, I was 18. You left your family behind. I left four step-families, a maid, a butler, a chauffeur, and a horse groomer who really got me. But Father was expanding his business to the US and so I had to go. I remember, at the airport, I was crying. But Father put his arm around me and he said, 'Son, only losers cry.' So that was a long flight. You don't know how dirty a dirty look can get until you're crying for a whole plane ride and you're not a baby. I really didn't wanna be in America. So I drank. And I recreated the snowy plains of Canada with cocaine. I'm told I attended classes at Pepperdine University, but I will have to take that on faith. So, I'm in a detox center in El Segundo. This was my fourth rehab. My re-re-re-rehab. I thought I'd been doing a kickass job keeping my drug stuff a secret from all the tenants and then you showed up in my room at that clinic. You brought me sopa de pollo and said it's Cuban penicillin. You told me, 'You eat this, you get some sleep, and tomorrow, you try again.' And then you tucked me in and kissed me good night on my forehead. Forehead kisses are wildly underrated. Just something really comforting about 'em. Then again, it might just be you. Dad never did that. Or my horse groomer. After I got out of rehab, I started hanging around your apartment a lot more, 'cause it helped. Back then, it must have felt like you had this annoying, intrusive guy over. Not like now. 'Cause now you're my family. Don't worry. I haven't legally changed my last name to Alvarez. My lawyer said it was a whole thing, so... Anyway, Pen said no crying, so I'm not gonna. Actually, for once, I agree with Father. Only losers cry. And we're not losing anybody today. Let's hit that oath ceremony soon, okay?" 2x13

#schneider #reference #odaat #one day at a time

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twistednuns · 5 years

Text

June 2019

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.”

A (very) sunny day in London. Seeing a seal in the Thames, right under the Tower Bridge. Walking through St. James’s Park, eating ice-cream. Taking a beautiful picture of Laura in Covent Garden. Finally getting out of the underground. A tiny rainbow reflection in the sky over Greenwich.

Playing badminton in the evening with Frank. Sitting by the river, making new friends (duckies).

Micha. Meeting in Thalkirchen after I had just seen a half dead mouse. Walking along the river, finding a nice spot across from the zoo with a bunch of musical hippies playing the drums on the other bank. We got drunk on Toro Loco and Grasovka in ice hockey cups until he kissed me in the middle of a sentence. It took quite a while until I noticed I was just kissing my first man with a tongue piercing. At some point I re-erected a knocked over portable toilet (does drunk me have superhuman powers?) and we walked to the subway together. Such a gentle weirdo.

Making breakfast for someone other than me. Sharing an apple. Eating out of the same bowl.

IKEA has veggie hot dogs now. Excellent. I also got a new cutting board. And that’s ALL I got. I’m virtually patting myself on the shoulder right now.

Christoph and Lauren’s wedding was pretty chill. We squeezed into a car, went up a very steep hill to attend the ceremony and spent the rest of the day around a camp fire drinking gin and tonics or dancing to very bad music. I loved getting to know Michael’s boyfriend of 4 years. I always received gay vibes from him… good to know that my gaydar isn’t broken.

Taking polaroid pictures in the beautiful afternoon light. I also loved Christian’s outtakes of the theme music quiz. One of them honestly looks as if I’d just won a beauty pageant - we have a host, two ladies with jealous side glances and me, all excited, open mouth, in front of the mic, waiting for her tiara…

Spending a few hours in my mum’s garden. Doing dangerous yoga exercises in the grass. Walking barefoot. Marveling at the lush roses everywhere. Watching a blackbird taking a bath under the cherry tree. Very entertaining.

I want to learn Spanish and this video gives me hope - apparently I can heavily rely on my French vocabulary.

Why the men I like usually look the same.

Hanging out with Martina, Tobi and Diego the dog at the Thalkirchen campsite. Watching the rafts go by (horrible music), driving them home with their car right before the apocalyptic thunderstorm.

The perfect dessert: berries or peaches with fresh cream. The perfect dinner: Truffle pasta.

The concept of eclecticism.

Spending the afternoon with Franzi at Maria Einsiedel. Meeting baby Elise for the first time. Hopping into the Eiskanal, turning my body into a freezer for five minutes. Eating tiny lemon ice-cream and galia melon.

Meeting Catrin and Andreas at Brillengalerie in Altheim. Really good cappuccino (he’s an optician AND a latte artist). I loved trying on those gorgeous glasses and talking to Catrin about the Latte Art championships and rude customers.

Our trip to the Bavarian Forest to make a cake tree for the wedding. We visited Lena’s uncle who turned a tree trunk into a three-tiered cake stand with his chainsaw. We helped. I really want to get a chainsaw license now.

Once again: roses. They are incredibly lush this year. I don’t know why exactly but climate change seems to have one tiny upside.

Drawing. Portrait practice. Filling my sketchbook from idee. Polychromos coloured pencils.

Using Instagram’s story feature for the first time. I love editing pictures and adding gifs and colours. Immature and tacky but fun.

Looking trough old analogue pictures. Finding lots of my dad looking like the perfect Millennial. 90s fashion really IS back. I still loathe fanny packs though.

I found someone who’s coming to India with me!! I’m going to travel with Bibi this summer. So excited!

Unfortunately: the Solitaire app on my phone. Unhealthy obsession. You know you’ve got a problem when you’re getting REALLY good…

The smell of dill pickles reminds evokes vivid memories of my grandma. She used to make them herself, in heavy stoneware next to the wash room in the cellar.

Spending the evening with Bibi at Kulturdachgarten (having Ginger Spritz as a sundowner in the late afternoon sun), eating Israeli mezze at NANA in Haidhausen and seeing Rocketman at Rio cinema. My colleague works there so we got discount tickets and free ice-cream. Taron Egerton is a fabulous actor. If I had to describe the film in one word it’d be flamboyant. Also, I’d have loved to be the costume designer for this.

Iglo veggie love frozen meals. With Hela curry ketchup. Nom.

Extremely cute new rockery plants (who will have to do with regular potting soil I’m afraid).

Meeting Andre at Thalkirchen. Spending the evening on an Isar gravel bank, drinking the beer Martina brought from Croatia. Joining the… eh, what’s the Mile High Club for people who prefer water to air travel? Catching the last train home. Taking dinky photobooth pictures because we still had ten minutes to spare. That fake photo strip makes me happy instantly whenever I look at it.

Getting better at asking for what I want.

The character Moe in the Netflix series Trinkets. To me, she’s so much more attractive than Tabitha. And I love her attitude. And her hookup in episode seven. What a pretty man.

Manu making me realise how much I look like my dad. “At least jawwise!”

Spending the evening with Tom. Pre-theatre Spritz, Melancholia at Kammerspiele, Isar-beer near Müllersches Volksbad. Talking about our insights and issues.

It’s fascinating to see the lupin in front of my balcony door open it’s blossoms gradually from bottom to top. This plant has such an interesting structure and geometry.

Salad season. Somehow I only like salads in the summer but then I eat them passionately. With strawberries, Black Forest tofu, peaches, blueberries, mangoes, olives. Those nice, firm Roma tomatoes you only get during the summer months. I made a huge bowl of Tabouleh the other day and had it for breakfast, lunch an dinner.

Going home in the morning, smelling of another person.

Booking flights to India. 5 weeks. I’ve never been gone for so long and then I chose India of all places… I feel a mild panic attack coming but I’m also super excited.

Artificial cherry flavour.

A day trip with Lexi. She brought crisps and a fun Mexican dice game which we played on the train. Spending the whole afternoon soaking in the warm water at Therme Bad Aibling. Discovering the amazing acoustics in the various domes. Making a new duckie friend. Weird mirror selfies with hairdryers. Dinner at a Bavarian restaurant in Rosenheim. Teaching le Sash some obscure Bavarian words.

The word obscure, come to think of it. Uncanny is a close second.

Jupiter being so bright in the night sky. I always notice it first as soon as it’s dark.

Librarians are secretly the funnest people alive.

So many things, really. I’m feeling quite happy at the moment. My only problem is that I keep gaining weight. Somehow enjoying myself is adverse to the strict regime I need in order to stay perfectly healthy.

Random things: Schweppes Fruity citrus and orange lemonade. Tomato sandwiches with fresh basil on olive ciabatta. That squirrel running over the garage roof in the morning. Dreaming of ferry rides through US rivers. And intercourse with a panther. The Garner Ambre Soleil natural bronzer spray with coconut oil. Nice colour, good smell, minimal chipmunk effect. And of course me regular Garnier sun oil. It’s the bottled essence of summer.

Filling in for someone in the Natural 20s pub quiz team. Being invited to a pen and paper round with feline characters only. Meeting Sophia who, I realised later, played Rosencrantz (or Guildenstern?) at Entity Theatre’s production of Hamlet last year.

My complete and utter obsession with Phil Collins’ version of You Can’t Hurry Love. I think it’s going to be my next karaoke song.

A desire and drive to be creative. Making collages out of dried leftover paint. Drawing on the window panes. Getting out gouache, pastel chalks, oil pastels, those weird 3-in-1 coloured pencils which create such a nice texture. Drawing first thing in the morning. Spending hours drawing owls for the coffee roasters. Using coloured pencils to draw portraits of all the cool girls of Instagram.

Oh, speaking of art. I don’t want to jinx it but I might get the chance to write a book soon! I met an editor who works at a publishing house for lifestyle books and needs someone to make a book about portrait drawing/painting for her. So. Excited. They’re also looking for a trainee in the graphic design department. I really hope I get to collaborate with them in one way or another.

Cute summer outfits. Good colour combinations. Accessorizing. Wearing pretty clothes with a creative twist. Actually putting some thought into putting together an outfit can be a lot of fun. After all it’s just another way of making a collage.

Polarized sunglasses providing me with the bluest skies and rainbow-tinted tram windows.

The Croatian man who sat down next to a visibly pregnant Bavarian woman on the subway and started telling her about his daughter Persephone and the abduction myth connected with her. I keep reading and hearing about Demeter and Persephone lately, for example about Baubo and the vulva presentations / Demeter worship.

Carmen Rohrbach’s Unterwegs sein ist mein Leben. I was very impressed by how much she has seen and experienced. How much she knows about nature and animals. I mean, she’s a biologist, too. Reading this book made my days a little more special because it gave me a sense of how much more there is to discover on this planet.

Eating vegan ice-cream (pumpkin seed and ginger-turmeric) with Micha. Sitting on the balustrade in front of the Art Academy. Staring into these insanely pretty blue eyes all the time. Looking for the toilets, roaming through the hallways. I love the architecture of that building.

A ladybug escaping the subway train through an open door. Freedom!

I love how the characters resemble each other so much in the different generations in the TV-series Dark. Uncanny. And they feature very nice colour contrasts, too. I guess I like their production designer / cinematographer.

Late-night Isar strolls. Drinking red wine, lying down, watching the stars surrounded by fireflies! (which are quite rare where I live so I was lucky - the strangest thing is that I had drawn a firefly into my sketchbook earlier that day, feels like I manifested it)

Tollwood gin and tonics, forgetting to go home, ending up in a gay club at 3am. Nice Thursday.

Making up for the lack of sleep on Friday afternoon. Waking up late. Releasing my inner Julia Child at 2am by making sushi rolls, taboulé and Bergsteigerbrot, something like super tasty vegan granola bars with lots of nuts and honey.

A little bike tour with Frank along the river. Pseudo-meditating on a log, eating some snacks I brought. Floating with the current. His alliterations (“further fodder for future followers”).

#personal #present perfect #things i love #june #2019 #june 2019

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pinksweatergettingbetter · 7 years

Text

aight

lets ends this

i love that he's still trying to cheer her up with her terrible crossover idea

phoenix is such a sweetie

“...so we may put this dead lawyer walking out of his misery”

hear hear

just kill me already

“she's now slain two high level clergymen...”

one of which was a confirmed rebel but HEY whatever ITS NOT LIEK YOU KILL THEM IN GENERAL ANYWAY

who gives a fuck this trial is janked

“bahlgilpo’kon hell- the realm of eternal agony”

wow eternal agony is the bottom hell??? thats like the first hell in dante’s hells; youre soft as runny shit kooraheenism.

“there she will suffer the endless punishment of ja’gar by the galuun of Puhlmo’ten.”

SUBTITLES PLEASE

he was killed during the rite but they only found his body like two days later?!?!

what the fuck!?

...and wait a fucking second, he wasnt there when we were fucking investigating BULLSHIT

BUUULLLLLSSSHHHIIIIIIT!!!

two consecutive murders constitutes a serial killer??

every time sadmad sighs and shakes his head i lose a year of my life

Rayfa’s voice is so fucking unfitting; she’s got the voice of a 30 year old woman and she’s supposed to be a whiny-ass 14 year old

do these people know anything about casting??

is it really that hard to get a 14 year old to say a few lines? i was voice acting (not professionally obvs) when i was 14. i sucked, but i was doing it, and there’ve been younger kids working on real shows.

anyway

welp looks like this mcfuck is using a fake name

someone get on that

I'm sorry you’re surrounded by such incompetence, Rayfa. and i mean that. i like you now, youre kinda funny.

phoenix: plus, yesterday, someone told me how the divination seance used to work

phoenix fucking sucks at keeping secrets jesus christ holy fuck just SHUT UP ABOUT THE REBELS YOU MORON

if he says let it go and move on again I'm going to fucking scream

“haha! the police overlooked the clergy tattoo on the back of his neck!”

directly below the stab wound. the clergy tattoo. that has significance in their country.

Why do the Kooraheen Police suck so much ass? They can’t catch a running suspect, and apparently they’re all blind.

HOW DOES THE JUDGE NOT FUCKING KNOW A RELIGIOUS SYMBOL FROM HIS OWN FUCKING RELIGION?!?!?

[insert nahyuta eats (peach emoji)ass joke]

“aren't they utterly different shapes?”

...a... peach... and an upside down peach?!

nahyuta

im gonna blow your mind

this is called a handstand, here, do it with me

lazy ass parents naming their kid “real name”

fuck this joke country

this is some ‘who's on first’ bullshit

RAYFA LUSTS FOR BLOOD

yeah it was freezing on that mountain, of course your estimate was wrong.

i knew this was coming...

hebLINDED HER WITH SCIENCE

BEEP BA BOO BA

“this article is small in size but huge in importance!”

just like my d––

How... did this work? They did a great job of hiding that wound...

also no blood at the “scene of the crime”

yeah not suspicious at all

once again the prosecution blames the detective for something they couldn’t have helped :/

GUARD YOUR ASSHOLE EMA, GUARD YOUR ASSHOLE

HOLY SHIT

INSERT REFERENCE TO ABOVE PEACH JOKE

loud ass clock inside a secret hideout? good one, rebels. super well done.

ahhhh

now that is clever. i like that

although, considering the length of that statue’s beak, he should’ve been impaled right through his body, so.....

you were close, SOJ

glad to see more clever twists though.

game ruins everything with blatant hints

there are other cases where they can tell when two weapons have been used on the same wound

why cant they tell now?

stone sharp enough to cut skin??

your hideout is fucking death trap

good going rebels

youre using serial killer wrong... again

thats a lie, nobody likes swiss cheese

LAY OFF CHEESE YOU PIECE OF SHIT

ILL RIP YOUR ASS OUT

“what you said is total bullshit!! heres what happened; this, this this. and since I said it ,its true! without any proof!!! SO THERE”

phoenix: VALID POINT!

sadmad: bullshit excuse

judge: sounds legit, overruled!

“jeez just toss me an Axe if its that bad...”

“plotting your escapee from this sacred hall?”

yeah well just run out

“you would pin a crime upon the dead, who you know tell no tales?”

did you just forget the whole

soul pool thing or

are you just stupid

aw baby here we go

stop saying 30% you dont know shit

oh my god

whoa whats he doing with the magatama

“wait... i think i saw something just now...”

what, phoenix

what did you see, hmm?

“the power of prayer! yes... it uh... helps you... install listening devices in your secrets base uuhhhhhh...ITS NOT WEIRD

“She has a way of putting me at ease...”

(weeps) my babies

(sigh) its the wife, get on with it

“long years of ascetic training have sharpened my ears”

god the training is more useful to Athena than it is Maya. this is depressing.

make like a mollusc and clam up??? who says that???????

boy you sure fuckin suck at this Mr. Inmee

judging by that KAAHHH Tahrust should have a deep voice, and DD had a deeper male voice blip... why aren't they using it? they've already implemented singing blips and tutting blips, did they forget about the extra deep blips?

or are those reserved for demons?

he is a ghost...

...how far along is behleeb anyway? either I'm blind or the sprite artist forgot to give her a baby bump.

hey yeah! she's barely pregnant! her character art shows that! so its not so much of a stretch that she could be running around killing rebels. Plus, she hasn’t been pregnant for two years...

...of course, its not her, it’s rUHEEL NAYMUH, but still. she’s not far along enough to be inconvenienced by her child.

potato potahto tomahto egg salad!!

stop praying at me, nahyuta.

dont you fucking dare...

dont you even fucking dare

THEY DARED

I SWEAR TO FUCK

i swear to fuck

so. youre gonna blame maya. for the actions. of YOUR OWN GODDESS.

WHO’S GREAT AND POWERFUL AND MYSTICAL AND WISE AND PERFECT.... UNLESS SHE’S BEING CHANNELED BY A DIRTY FOREIGNER?

i just i cannot express how angry this makes me. it doesn’t make any fucking sense and it’s complete and utter hypocrisy. it’s even worse than before; before they were suggesting that the person dressed as Lady Kee’ra was killing rebels in her name, if it wasn’t outright her. Now they’re suggesting it was LITERALLY HER, and remember, these people are UBER RELIGIOUS, and they still have a problem with THEIR IMMORTAL GODDESS IN THE FLESH exacting her divine punishment against people THAT ARE HARMING THEIR COMMUNITY ANYWAY???

yes, vigilantism is dangerous. but it gets a little more fucking complicated when you suggest that it’s the legit actions of an ACTUAL GODDESS.

and even if this is the corrupt government just trying to cover up deaths (which it is) why didn’t they just step in and go “Yeah, another Lady Kee’ra murder. All hail the marvellous goddesses. er diarrhoea kooraheen.”

it would be a lot easier and a lot less messy than taking a kid to court. why do they even want Maya out of the way, anyway? She didn’t know any of the rebels, and she posed no threat to their corrupt government. Yeah, Zealot’s dead, but they literally could have just hired another crazy assassin.

Unless there’s a REAL GOOD FUCKIN REASON for all of this, I call bullshit, bullshit bULLSHIT

i think it’s time to let your head go and move on to another room sadmad

at the same time

...plus they legit just forgot their own lore.

maya can’t summon Kee’ra if she doesn’t know what she looks like.

that was so easy i didnt have to even press on statements; thats how easy that contradiction is. thats how easy it is to remember something stated five minutes ago, and how easy it is to remember how your own religion works. you fuckhats.

oh hey i just realized Tahrust really does call Behleeb his “lovely wife”

aw. how nice. if only they didnt decide to scapegoat maya.

doesn't matter your intentions; you die if you scapegoat maya. you die by my blade.

you ok pal. is an alarm clock really the source of an evil laugh.

“indeed! we leave the alarm switched off at all times!”

why would you even have a clock with an alarm on it in a secret base anyway?? and how did phoenix manage to play it in the hideout if the alarm was switched off?

“those distinctive taiko drums”

fuckin’ finally

ive been waiting for that stupid watch to come back for AAAGEES

of course there was a reason maya would mention traditional japanese instruments...

y’know it’s funny that he would even make that fuckup in the first place. if he’s a plumed punisher fan, he should know how the theme song goes. his wife was at least a big fan, meaning he’d probably have heard the opening enough times to know that Taiko drums weren’t part of it. Furthermore, if he was banking on the fact that the two themes sound similar to pass off the deception, then it was a huge mistake on his part to define the sound as Taiko drums; thats just a needless detail that could get him caught out, which it did.

and if he just didn’t know, well... again, useless detail. always bad. always be vague if you wanna get away with shit.

ah... at least in death, Raheel Namer didn’t have to suffer the Plumed Punisher theme song.

i love that phoenix refers to the show by it’s full title. that’s adorable.

now what’s really confusing me is that that Photo of the fam is stated to have been taken during the Feast of whatever. Which is the same time-frame as Reely Real Name’s death. He’s alive in the photo, Behleeb is in the photo, and the Judge and his family are nowhere to be found. But all those things were huge parts of the case, and they couldn’t have eaten before or after because of the whole ‘you can only eat Ghingil for three hours on that one special day’.

am I missing something or going nuts??

that said I'm so glad i can finally present this photo. it’s been gnawing at me as much as the watch thing.

“trademark topknot”

OH PLEASE JUST LET IT END

ffjglk dlg ljlgkd hey Tahrust do me a solid and just tell them how you died ok

please i have a family

i have stomach ulcers

off-brand logic

i totally forgot that was in this game too

wow.

“hmm, there’s really nothing to suggest a murder other than the red water in the spring, which only Maya would see and probably not question (considering this isn’t her religion and she doesn’t fuckin know how that shit works) and said spring probably empties somewhere, since it would be swampy otherwise. let’s see... i can KILL MYSELF TO GIVE THE RED WATER A REASON FOR EXISTING or do literally anything else... WELP, BETTER FUCKIN KILL MYSELF. ALL HAIL THE REBELS!”

...well at least he saved maya from contracted a blood disease.

tahrust must be pissed that his death came to naught when his own rebel pals gave the secret key to a guy who sold them out in five seconds.

never gets to meet his child... never gets to see the revolution come to fruition... never gets to live happily with his family... all because he couldn’t think of any other solution to protecting that shitty hovel behind a rock.

kinda tragic.

wish i was less angry

“there was no weapon at the inner sanctum...”

did everyone just forget the giant bloody murder statue???

pohl’fuckya sadmad

babe... oh no... don’t give yourself up like this

thats sad

dont

i feel the sad now

shit

“abbot inmee!! summon a physician at once!!’

HES DEAD

WAY TO RUIN THE MOMENT WITH UNINTENTIONAL COMEDY DUMBASS

“but murder sanctioned by the crown is still murder”

what’s murder sanctioned by a goddess? apparently you guys are ok with that one. oh unless it’s a goddess being channeled by a foreigner.

soerry im bitter about that one moving on now

he lunged at you from behind the stone slab?? nice trajectory moron

hang on a second he put reereenaymee’s body in the plaza before prayer time... with the dagger still in him??

HOW DID NOBODY NOTICE THE FUCKING DAGGER

“you need not frame the accused for your crime”

for once Sadmad says something smart

honestly... suicide really wasn’t the answer. even if it was to protect your wife there were,,,,, so many other options

for example, realname’s last moments, as we saw, made it look like he was killed in the Plaza of devotion. You could have so easily made it look like he was murdered there, by some rando, during the rite. The kooraheen police fucking suck at their job, so it wouldn’t matter. but no; you had to die, and blame Maya.... because she was foreign. A foreigner who came to you for guidance and shelter.

STOP AGREEING WITH ME SADMAD, I DONT LIKE YOU

“You must use your law powers to make sure no more innocent people suffer under this shitty law!!

...like Maya did!! .......because of me!!

i love that the excuse is like “there’s no way she could prove it was self defence in this government...” to make it all tear-jerking and point out how horrible and corrupt their legal system is...

...and yet, if we remember Reunion and Turnabout, which also included channeling and self defence... It was EQUALLY impossible for Maya to be cleared of the crime on self-defence charges!!

pot calling the kettle black, japanifornia!

“lol sorry for almost getting you killed cause i couldn't think of a better plan than kill myself”

yea thanks tahrust, coo-al

“I ask that you look after my wife”

er she’s... going to jail... she’s... been outed as a rebel... you do get that right

fuck you Tahrust, you made her cry

“now you can watch over me from the world beyond”

he cant actually, since they retconned spirits being conscious in the afterlife. good going, capcom.

oh man that cutscene was goofy. except for the crying

fuck you Tahrust

Maya: :D hOW y'all doin?!

also according to maya Tahrust didnt leave any regrets behind which means that he totally gives no fucks that his dumbass plan endangered Maya’s life and made his wife cry. Dick.

He doesn't even regret missing the birth of his fuckin child. Ass.

Sadmad: I owe a debt to you, one that I will return––

Me: Eat a rotten egg.

Sadmad: Wha-–

Me: Go on, master of putrescence. Eat a whole rotten egg. Consume it shell and all. You heard me. Insert the egg into your mouth and chomp down. Times ticking, I’m waiting.

i forgot about the stupid butterflies

“So I was thinking, Nick, the legal system here is really stacked agains the defence! It’s really unfair!”

YA DONT SAY

listen to this happy music playing as everyone is forced to come to terms with all this sad ass shit. also it appears we just forgot about that tiny matter of the government literally putting hits out. Rayfas dad. is doing this. Nobody gonna address that?? No? Ok

Maya: QUIT BEINA LIL BITCH

wait what

what is this new sprite

eurhg i dont like it put it away

thats not maya thats a husk of evil

wow. rayfa didnt even know why maya was here training. the bullshit continues to flow...

Maya: deciding what is true and what is false for your people...

the actual truth and lies, right? RIGHT? MAYA???

ergh this is so... corny? schlocky? it feels forced

“Sorry for almost getting you killed anyway VIVE LA REVOLUTION”

Yay! It’s vore man!! i kinda missed his stretchy face.

oh well that

thats just a really anticlimactic reveal of Dhurke

like tada! there he is! and he's gone! whatever; he's just been talked about in hushed whispers for the last case or w/e!

awww the bailiff thinks he can catch a running rebel!! so cute~

“The Steel Samurai vs Dhurke the Rebel!”

MAYA. THE LAST FIVE MINUTES WERE DEVOTED TO EXPLAINING THAT THE REBELS ARE THE GOOD GUYS. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM???

i love that they keep hammering in that “maya has stayed maya”

see guys??? dont you just feel the magic of the trilogy??? ITS THERE GUYS WE SWEAR

Welp, thats it for that case. Now back to America, to visit Athena and BK, and hopefully to read a more enjoyable storyline...

#sulking over SOJ #soj spoilers #soj spoilers obvs]

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biofunmy · 5 years

Text

Jewish Summer Camp With Campfires, Crafts and No Lights Out

As if on cue, the first camper I meet is a guy named Josh: a nice, 27-year-old Jewish boy with kind eyes, a subtle smile and the same name as my husband, another nice Jewish boy, back home.

“Do you know where Malbec is?” asks this Josh, Josh Blake, rolling his eyes, and then his suitcase, over a wide dirt path flanked by rickety cabins that have been renamed for the weekend. (Malbec and Cabernet, for the men; Pinot Grigio and Rosé for the women; Raisins for all.) “I don’t want to walk all the way over there, if it’s back there …” he says, sounding not unlike Woody Allen.

I don’t blame him. The camp is desert-hot and dusty. And he’s ultimately here, he later admits over bagels, because his parents paid the all-inclusive $525 for him to be. They met on this very land, albeit half a mile away. “Talk about pressure!” he says, laughing.

Ilana Rosenberg, 31, sitting nearby, agrees. “My mother said, ‘Have fun! Go meet your Jewish husband!’ My sister was like, ‘Mom, she could find a Jewish wife, too, you know’.”

American Jewish University owns these 2,800 acres in Southern California’s Simi Valley, which is home to rolling hills and herds of cows, the university’s Brandeis-Bardin Campus and Camp Alonim. Over the next three nights and four days, this 66-year-old summer camp for Jewish kids has been commandeered by a new kind of summer camp — Trybal Gatherings, for Jewish adults.

Trybal Gatherings was founded by Carine Warsawski, 34, a buoyant, Boston-bred M.B.A., with the goal of fostering lasting community among Jews in their 20s and 30s, and, ahem, a few in their 40s.

She held her first Gathering at Camp Eisner in the Berkshires in 2017, roping in mostly friends of friends. Over Labor Day weekend, it sold out, with 125 campers and a wait-list dozens’ deep. Last year, she added Wisconsin; next summer Atlanta, and has plans to expand from Seattle to Austin to Toronto.

Whereas traditions like Birthright Israel offer free trips to the homeland, Ms. Warsawski’s aim is to offer an immersive, low-commitment experience closer to home — one rooted not in Zionism or religious doctrine, but in the shared nostalgia of a Jewish-American rite of passage, complete with archery and horseback riding, and a roster that reads like it’s from the Old Testament. (At one point, I’d forgotten my name-necklace. “That’s O.K.!” someone joked. “It’s probably either Sarah or Rachel.”)

There are two main differences between Jewish kids’ camp and Jewish adults’ camp: No bedtime, and booze, lots of it. Kiddie-pools brimming with hard seltzer at Bubbe’s Beer Garden. Bottles of cheap wine at supper. Compostable flutes of bubbly at Arts & Crafts.

Also, adult campers have careers, though no one talks about them. Web developers and screenwriters, wedding planners and wardrobe stylists. And yes, a few doctors and lawyers. The majority came solo; others hand-in-hand and interfaith or happily married in matching outfits, like Emily and Rachel Leavitt — my Secret Santa, er, Mystery Moses.

It’s a mix of die-hard camp people reliving their glory days, once-homesick campers redoing their awkward years, and first-timers wondering what all the fuss is about. “My parents were immigrants from Iran! They didn’t know about camp!” says Baha Aghajani, 30. Neither did Saraf Shmutz, 39, who moved from Tel Aviv to San Diego. “My summers were ‘go play soccer and bug off.’”

As a writer who hasn’t been back to her camp, Young Judaea, in New Hampshire, in 25 years, I signed up to learn what’s moving Jews to opt for uncomfortable bunk beds and kosher-style mess halls, in lieu of a real vacation.

Trybal isn’t the only over-21 camp cropping up these days. Nor is it the only Jewish one. Camp Nai Nai Nai, which also operates on both coasts, and attracts a post-college, more conservative crowd. And “55+” Orthodox Jews have been davening at summer retreats for decades at places like Isabella Freedman where campers crochet kippahs and take day trips to Tanglewood, in the Berkshires.

Trybal is arguably the only camp, though, that starts the day with an “Abe Weissman Workout,” a calisthenics routine straight out of “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.” (Tomato juice refreshers included, but no rompers.)

It’s also, explains Ms. Warsawski, “a place for people who are more -ish than Jew.” Like Molly Shapiro, 28, of Berkeley. ““This is my jam!” she says. “Synagogues today aren’t really designed for us. We want something less traditional, more affordable, more fun. I mean, playing cornhole isn’t Jewish, but we’re playing cornhole together!”

Togetherness is what Trybal is all about. The schedule is packed from early morning to midnight with get-to-know-you-games and group activities like partner massage and mah-jongg, pickling and pool time.

The next morning, I pass up dreamcatcher-making for challah baking. “Oh yeah, this is what I’m here for,” says Abel Horwitz, a young Robert Downey Jr., kneading dough we’ll later braid and adorn with toppings beyond the traditional sesame. Rainbow sprinkles. Peaches. Jalapeños. “Will 20 loaves be enough for all 60 of us tonight,” some Jews worry.

Next, it’s a tossup between the relationship workshop and the ropes course. I decide I like humans more than heights and head over to hear what the visiting Rabbi Sherre Hirsch, has to say. She reads a passage from the 20th-century philosopher Emmanuel Levinas and tells us to partner up. A 26-year-old named Sam and I stare into each other’s faces for a full five minutes. “Sit with the discomfort,” the rabbi urges. Reluctantly, I do. I smile. He winks. I wiggle, examining his wrinkle-free forehead and bushy eyebrows bound to grow bushier in old age, until my awkwardness turns to calm. I’m overwhelmed by a deep feeling of curiosity and compassion for this man, for myself, for humanity.

“That was a good reminder,” Ms. Aghajani says afterward. “To give people more of a chance. To not swipe so fast.”

After a grilled cheese buffet, there’s solar art and yoga and Slip-n-Slide kickball. I head for the hammocks, where a guy with long red hair is lounging in a tie-dyed Helvetica T-shirt that reads “Falafel & Sabich & Hummus & Schwarma.” It’s his third Trybal. He is the camp guitarist, and a rocket scientist in real life.

“I come to be a kid again,” Jeremy Hollander, 34, says. He pauses. “And to, you know, be with my people.” In real life, he doesn’t bring up the fact he’s Jewish. “‘Hollander’ isn’t ‘Schwartzenbaum’. People see me and usually think I’m Scottish or something.” He feels safer that way. Especially today, he says, with rising anti-Semitism. “The flame is being fanned. You never know who has what opinions. Here, I can let my hair down.” (Although, technically, it’s in a ponytail.)

“The only one thing I have to worry about at camp,” he says, “is when am I going to squeeze in a shower?”

Still, before sundown, we all emerge from our bunks neat and clean and dressed in white. “Can you believe I got this for $2.99 at Saks Off Fifth!” exclaims Lauren Katz, a volunteer staffer wearing lace. (We can’t.)

Picture time. “Say Cheese!” the camp photographer instructs. “But we’re lactose intolerant!” someone cries from the crowd.

We gather in a stone-lined grove, to sing and sway and cheek-kiss “Shabbat Shalom,” before making our way to the dining hall for a sit-down dinner of roast chicken. And, of course, plenty of challah.

It’s all so familiar to me. The tunes are different, but the Hebrew words are the same. The trees are eucalyptus, not pine, and Mr. Hollander is not the longhaired, tie-dye-clad musician from my old camp, and yet — he could be.

I agree with what he said earlier. There is something easy and assuring about spending a summer weekend like I used to (albeit for eight whole weeks): with my people. Or, at least with people who remind me of my people. New friends bonded by old memories.

Trybal is like a modern millennial shtetl, where gesundheits fly. And “Hava Nagila” plays at a Hawaiian luau. And campfire stories include, “How I Became a ‘Nice Jewish Guys’ Calendar Model.”

It’s an alternate, insular world where I find myself running through a field, streaked in war paint, chanting: “We have spirit, because we’re Blues! We have spirit because we’re Jews!”

It’s a universe where conversation flows from the Netflix show “Shtisel” to the lack of Jews in Santa Barbara to the universal disdain for online dating (despite the fact that Trybal is sponsored by JSwipe), to whether Ms. Rosenberg indeed met her future husband.

“We’ll see,” she says, smiling. She did make-out at Arts & Crafts with the Trybal barista: a boy she barely remembers being at her bat mitzvah.

On the last night, I slip quietly out of the luau, where the D.J. is rocking “Lean On Me.” I leave the Leavitt ladies in their twin Hawaiian shirts and my Rosé bunkmates dancing the macarena. Mr. Shmutz and the Cabernets are making reunion plans. Mr. Blake is flirting with one of his crushes.

I have an early flight to catch. Back to my husband and kids and, in a way, the future. In the morning, I’ll miss the friendship bracelets and the compliment circle and, like a true last day of camp: tears. For a moment I have FOMO. And then I realize, it’s fine. Sometimes an Irish goodbye is just as good as a Jewish one.

Rachel Levin is a contributor to the Travel section and the author, with Wise Sons Deli, of “EAT SOMETHING,” to be published in March, by Chronicle Books.

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