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itstokkii · 9 months

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Reconciliation

In which Alfred confesses twice and Soojin is at a loss each time

Word Count: 2.7k words

“Hey, South…?” Soojin heard the familiar voice of Alfred F Jones as she turned to her hotel room. He sounded a little…serious. But this late at night? She sighed. The Opening Ceremony already took most of her energy out of her after socializing with an overwhelming amount of countries she either did or barely knew. “What is it, Alfred?” Soojin turned to look at him. He looked nervous, eyes darting around at the hotel decor before looking at her.

“Could you…walk with me for a little?” He seemed to find a framed photograph of Rose of Sharon flowers quite amusing. Soojin weighed her options. It wasn’t like she did anything bad, and she didn’t really take him as the type to attack her while nobody was around. Even if he did, she had about two thousand years of military training. She could quickly pin him to the ground, or cause him to lose consciousness, or break his arm. Whichever came first.

As they were walking, Alfred began his whole spiel about how proud he was of Soojin, and how quickly the country was able to rise from its ashes and open themselves to the world stage(“what better way to do that than host the Summer Olympics, am I right?”), and that he’s glad to have helped make the Miracle happen.

She tuned him out in her head. Ever since the War, she had become a sort of... spectacle for the other nations to watch. Every single meeting or gala she attended always involved Alfred sneaking up out of nowhere, introducing her to every single country and holding her by the waist as he went on and on about how the South was well on its way to become a successful nation, with his help of course.

The War. She can’t help but think back to her older brother. How is he doing now? She thought. She had missed her brother and wanted him to be there for the Olympics, but that would be impossible now given North Korea’s boycott.

All of a sudden, Alfred stopped walking. Soojin followed suit, only to find that they were outside. The sky was an inky black, with few stars illuminating the sky due to the many city lights overwhelming it. Though it may have seemed like a long time, to Soojin it felt like Korea’s urban development and economy all happened in the blink of an eye.

“Soojin? Soojin, are you listening?” The wave of his hand in front of her eyes snapped her out of her thoughts. Soojin looked up at him. “You kinda zoned out for a while there.”

She cleared her throat at a lazy attempt to save face. “Why did you stop walking?”

“Oh, yeah, that,” he sniffed a nearby bush of flowers, voice wavering, “I…wanted to tell you something.”

She stared up at him expectantly. “Well? What is it?”

There was a short silence. Heart pounding, he took a deep breath. “I…like you.”

She didn’t know what to think. Her first option was denial. There was no way he liked her, romantically, when there were probably tons of other people that were more likely to date him.

“That’s normal,” she said, “…Friends like each other. That’s what friends do.” She used the word friends sparingly. If someone asked her about her relationship to Alfred, she wouldn’t know how to respond. Friends? They had genuine conversations together, talking about their siblings and childhoods as they tried to pass the time. But she wouldn't consider herself very close to Alfred. He'd always assert and impose conditions onto agreements or deals or anything else. Whatever was offered came with a hefty price.

There were times where she absolutely loathed him. She couldn't pretend to enjoy his presence at a time where he was showing her off at galas as his "success story" while her people and their livelihoods suffered at the hands of the military dictatorship he set up.

So if she had to answer honestly, she would probably say no. Not a friend, but an acquaintance.

Or that’s what she told herself to help her sleep at night.

Alfred's voice pulled her out of her contemplations.

"Not like how I like you."

He sounded like a middle schooler confessing to one of their classmates.

She hated it. She hated how he could say things that would make her heart swell with all the happy feelings in the world, things of hopes and dreams and now love. She hated how he talked about her right in front of her like she was a commodity, a tale to springboard his own reputation as a protector of the world. She hated how he never gave her a moment of peace, even when he wasn't in the country. She hated how the government and its politicians all reminded her of Alfred as they promised reform and justice and peace, while destroying the foundations of those ideals. She hated his laugh, the sound haunting her when she was in world meetings. She hated that smile of his. She hated Alfred.

Soojin hated Alfred F Jones.

His ego was a giant beast, and she didn't feel like feeding it any longer, especially if she accepted his confession.

She took a deep breath and looked at him. She could see right through him. It looked like he was trying to keep his composure, but on the inside he was falling apart. Every second of silence felt like death to him. She almost felt bad for what she was about to say.

"I appreciate that you feel that way towards me, but I must reject. I apologize for not being able to reciprocate your feelings in kind."

His face scrunched up in confusion, and it looked...painful. "What? Why?"

"I already told you." She was about to leave as he grabbed her wrist.

"No, why? Why can't you like me back? Why can't we do this?"

"I don't want to be your "success story" as much as I already am now! You use my pain for what? Praise towards you alone? You might think you're out there playing world police and fighting dictatorships around the world, but you created one right here in my own home! The reason our Miracle happened was because we managed to finally turn things around after 3 decades of suffering! You already have enough control here! Isn't that enough for you?" She sighed, out of breath from pouring out 40 years of her inner turmoil out on him.

They were right. The truth really does set you free.

Soojin looks up at him. His eyes are cast downwards, staring intently at the sidewalk. She's a little shocked. This is the first time she's ever seen him this quiet before. Giving him what little sympathy she had left for him, she quietly leaves to allow him to ponder his own thoughts.

And so he did, toying at the hem of his shirt as the past 4 decades flashed through his head.

So much has happened since then. World Cup. Asian Games. Gangnam Style. K-beauty. K-Fashion. K-Dramas.

Since the end of the Miracle on the Han River, South Korea skyrocketed into international fame, largely due to soft power. Kpop had bursted in popularity, with EXO-Ls, ONCEs, and ARMYs all over Asia, Europe, and America.

America...

Alfred.

Their relationship was...thawing to say the least. Every diplomatic mission involved congratulating Soojin on something new she had accomplished.

He made it a habit to make Soojin watch a new kdrama with him whenever he visited her.

Slowly, she found herself laughing alongside him at the comedy scenes.

Was she beginning to...enjoy his presence?

...No, that couldn't be it.

"Yeah it is!" Taiwan whisper-yelled as she sipped her frappe. "You like when he's around!" Soojin, Mei, and Hyungsoo were eating lunch at a busy cafe, a week left until the Pyeongchang Winter Olympics started.

"Soojin, please don't tell me you like him. There's no way you like him of all people, right?!" Hyungsoo shook her violently in desperation. "Please, I'm not as antisocial as everyone thinks! I know a few guys, just please not him...!"

"O-oppa, stop! I'm trying to figure it out myself, okay?" She squeezed his arms to get him to stop. "You know, I can't help it. I hated when he would come over, but now I count the days until the next time he comes! I used to hate him but now-now I don't know!"

As her lackluster attempt at defending herself was over, something vibrated in her purse. Soojin checked her phone to see a text from none other than Alfred F Jones.

Alfie: Let's hang out after the opening ceremony's after party!

Before she was about to ask him why he wanted to hang out with her all of a sudden, Hyungsoo shrieked. "Alfie?" You entered his contact name as Alfie?"

Mei's ears perked up at the nickname. "Aww, isn't that cute!"

"It is not!" Hyungsoo snapped.

"Yes it is!"

"Anyway," Soojin broke up the fight. "He asked me if I wanted to hang out with him after the ceremony."

"Say yes!" Taiwan yelled.

임수진: okay!

The three of them stared intently at the checkmark and the three dots following after. He was typing a response.

Alfie: what about your hotel room?

"WHAT?" Hyungsoo screeched. He then realized he was in a busy cafe. "what?" The Korea twins reserved a shared hotel room together–further symbolism of the two nations becoming one for the year's Olympics. If Alfred were to...hang with her...in their shared room...

"Come on, Hyungsoo! They clearly have some issues they need to work out! Please?" Mei squeezed his shoulders.

"No."

"Please? Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?"

Hyungsoo pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "No."

"Ok, how about I post those sexy pics of your abs on my instagram then-" Taiwan pulled out her phone.

"Okay fine! ...But don't...do the do, you know? Don't get all hot and heavy... I mean don't have–"

"I won't, oppa!" Soojin's face erupted into a bright red. She focused on texting to distract her from what her brother said.

임수진: sure!

Alfie: alright, its a date!

The three looked at each other after reading that last message.

Taiwan wiggled her eyebrows.

As much as South Korea considered herself a "social" person, she forgot how exhausting it was to host events and have to greet and make small talk with about a hundred nations. She was more than ready to pass out on her bed.

Her "date" didn't make that easy.

She was busy talking to Turkey and France as a hand wrapped around her waist, and she smelled a flurry of cologne.

His cologne.

She sighed. "Is it time already, Alfred?"

"Wow, how'd you guess? Probably because you know me so well after all these years, huh?" His chipper voice hammered against her eardrums. "Anyway, let's go! Your room, right?"

A question had never sounded louder.

Sadik spit out his sparkling water and Francis gave...one of those smiles.

"Ohonhonhonhonhon...have fun you two~"

Soojin was sure she'd die on the spot if she was human.

"Alfred, please," she sighed as they both walked down the hall, "don't say it like that, especially out loud..."

His face flushed red. "Hehe. Sorry about that, guess I got way too excited!"

Now to ask him the important things. "Why did you want to hang out with me anyway? You know how tight my schedule is," Soojin stopped at the door of her room. Well, more like her and her brother's room. All the countries had their flags on their room doors, but on Soojin's and Hyungsoo's room door was the unified flag of Korea, a white flag with the Korean Peninsula in blue.

His eyes darted around the room as if he was making up a lie(he was, she could tell). "Uh.. I wanted to congratulate you?"

Soojin scoffed. "You did that already–about twelve times if I counted that right. Now, the real reason, if you don't mind?"

"Well... I wanted to apologize."

Well. This was new.

"Apologize? For what, exactly?"

He mustered the strength to look into her eyes and steeled his nerves. "For everything. For separating you from your brother and making you two fight. For starting a military dictatorship that terrorized your people. For all that my military has done to you. And for continuously wronging you again and again, seeing you as my strategic location and nothing else, thinking I was doing the right thing..."

Soojin was shocked. She knew he was capable of a multitude of things, but she had never once seen him apologize to anyone. And he sounded so serious too, there was no way he was being ingenuine. As soon as she believed she got over the shock, he apologized for one more thing.

"And... I'm sorry for expecting you to love me back way back then. Back in '88, and now, as I ask for your heart again."

Ah....

Taiwan was right.

Why else would what he said shoot straight through her heart?

Alfred nervously chuckled. "Y-you know, you don't have to answer right away. This is about you, not me. I'm willing to wait however long it takes for you to give me your answer."

She clutches a pillow and breathes into it, burying her face into the white plush. Her stomach burst into a thousand butterflies, and a million thoughts were spinning through her head. She did like him...a little. But she wanted to make sure, and she didn’t think it would be smart to immediately brush everything over and accept his confession.

"Alfred, I... Over the years, I've enjoyed your presence a lot. I'm glad you took the time to apologize for your actions. It's a first, actually," she chuckled nervously, "to hear you genuinely apologize for something. I truly do appreciate it." Looking up to see him shifting his weight from foot to foot, Soojin decided to make it quick.

"However, I don't think I can accept your feelings right away. That would be like rewarding you for the bare minimum. I like what we have now, so let's keep that, if you don't mind...?"

"Oh...alright." If Alfred had puppy ears, she could see them droop down. "If that's what you want," he smiled bitterly.

There was an uncomfortable silence. Soojin stared at her pillow. Alfred wiped his tears on his sleeve and looked around the room. After about a few minutes, he mustered a smile and asked her something, staring at the colorful box holding the latest game console in the corner of the room. They still needed to hang out, after all.

If not lovers, then friends. He'll be okay with that.

"Wanna smash?"

Soojin smiled.

It was two in the morning when North Korea bid Vietnam, Taiwan, and Hong Kong goodnight to head to his room after an exhausting after party. He was deep in his thoughts.

How could Soojin betray me like this? I thought cohosting meant it was a partnered effort! She knows I hate hosting events alone! Oh well, I knew about it anyway...

He made a turn in the hallway and noticed the flag that marked his bedroom. He smiled as he noticed the unified Korean flag on the door. Maybe in a distant future...?

He opened the door to see them playing video games and eating chips.

"What...are you doing??" He asked, incredulously confused.

"Playing Super Smash Brothers," Alfred said through a mouthful of chips.

"Wanna join?" Soojin handed him a third controller. He looked at her, eyes sparkling and crumbs dusting her mouth as she smiled at him.

Chuckling, he took the controller, mirroring her smile, and connected to the screen. He thought back to the lunch outing with his sister and Taiwan.

If they did get together during the time they were alone, he supposed he didn't mind.

And if they didn't? Well, he'd understand. If he was Soojin, he'd reject Alfred as well, considering the damage the American brought upon the both of them. He didn't take her for someone that would immediately forget, even after she made amends with someone.

But he had a feeling that she would come to terms with how she feels soon enough, whatever that would be.

This is my first fanfiction, so please go easy on me!! Its kind of like brain vomit but cleaned up a little

but also please let me know what you think!!!

#hetalia #aph south korea #nyo south korea #im soo jin #aph america #alfred f jones #amekor #kimchiburger #the only part of this not historically accurate is the smash i think #aph taiwan #aph north korea #im hyung soo #tokki writes

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