#my god i hate coldplay so fucking much
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This is a visual representation of what Coldplay sounds like to me.
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south london forever
noel fielding x reader
notes:
you and noel spend an evening on the roof together (kinda)
inspired by the song by florence and the machine
The world moved so fast. A cliché, but so very true. It felt like only yesterday that you were sixteen, sitting atop the roof of your family home in the night's late hours, thoughts racing much too rapidly for sleep to even have crossed your mind. It was calming and provided a type of clarity that comes with the awareness of being the only one awake in the household, watching the slowness of a slumbering suburb. A few straggling cars making their way home; the irregularities in the flicker of the lamp post; an occasional cat bounding through the bushes.
"Can't sleep?"
The voice shook you back to reality; here, to your shared flat, in Shoreditch. So caught up in your nostalgia, you failed to notice your housemate (and good friend) standing before you. You were slouched back on the couch, a worn-out vintage thing, empty cup of tea resting on your lap, a blanket wrapped around your shoulders.
You shook your head, placing your cup on the coffee table and stretching your legs.
"Me neither."
"You've got a gig tomorrow, haven't you? Shouldn't you be getting your beauty sleep?"
"Nah. We canceled. Well... resheduled." He sat down beside you.
"Canceled, my arse." You stifled a chuckle; you knew full well Noel relished his time onstage with his best mate, especially when it was followed by a wild night on the town. Hell, he caroused with Amy Winehouse.
"No, really, we did. There's no gig tomorrow. We've got the next few weeks off in fact."
"What, did the BBC finally come to their senses?" When Noel didn't laugh, nay, respond, you grew concerned. "Oh shit... you're not actually canceled are you?"
"Oh no, no! Not that. Ju's just gotta go sort some family stuff out. And they're all in Leeds, so..." He trailed off. "Someone's not well, I think."
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Poor thing. I hope he's okay."
"He'll be right." Noel's upper body shifted to face you. "How about you?"
"What about me?"
"Are you okay, Y/n?"
You shrugged.
He sighed.
Silence. For a few moments.
Before he spoke once more.
"I've an idea." Noel stood up hastily, holding his hand out for you to take. "Well, come on then!"
You smiled softly as you took his grasp in yours, and suddenly, you were so very aware of him. The minimal contact between the two of you sent sparks up your spine - like that of your first teenage crush when he smiled at you in the schoolyard. Did Noel feel that way too? No! Of course, he didn't, you twat! You told yourself... even if you slighty... slighty... fancied him... you were just mates. Besides, you were pretty sure you saw him snog Courtney Love at that party last week. Didn't you?
"Where are we going?" You questioned, trying to distract yourself from your internal dialogue.
"Surprise." By this point, Noel had grabbed both your coats off the coat rack, and chucked you yours, along with a pair of boots. You donned them both, as did he, and then he took your hand once more and dragged you into the garage and into the car.
"Can I put the radio on?"
"Go for it. But make sure it's something good! I can't stand that poxy, popular shit." He reversed the vehicle, pulling out onto the road. "And no Coldplay! God, I fucking hate Coldplay!!"
You chuckled to yourself, as you fiddled with the buttons, switching channels until you struck aria gold; bingo! The Passenger by Iggy Pop. A perfect song for a midnight drive through the streets of Shoreditch.
"Fuck yeah!" Noel began to sing along to the lyrics, a happy camper. "We'll ride through the city tonight-"
"See the city's ripped backsides-" You joined in.
"We'll see the bright and hollow sky-"
"We'll see the stars shine so bright."
"The stars made for us tonight..." Noel's voice faded out, and he took his eyes off the road for a split second, grinning at you. You couldn't help but smile back, until he averted his gaze once more to the dark road ahead. There was little traffic out at this time... a few people on their way home from parties, work shifts, or concerts maybe?
"What are you gonna do without Julian here?" You asked, turning the volume of the radio down.
"Hmm. Work probably. Try write some jokes." His hand raked through his hair scrunching it between his fingers as he always did. "I dunno. Me and Ju are a power team; not sure if I'll be able to come up with much without him."
"Don't put too much pressure on yourself, Noel. But believe in yourself. You'll be able to."
"Thanks, Y/n."
Noel indicated left, and pulled into an empty car park, in front of the little sleeping art museum. It was strange to see it at this time; usually bustling with people, the building looked quaint... humble... as though the paintings and sculpture were all tucked away in their little beds.
"Besides, I think I hear a calling coming from the general direction of Camden."
You laughed, as you exited the car, shutting the door softly behind you.
"What? You'd be welcome to join me... but I'm guessing the atmosphere of good old Camden town isn't really your thing-"
"I'd love to." You cut him off.
"It's a date. Now, come with me." Noel grabbed you by the hand and ran towards the back of the building. There was little illumination, but Noel located a ladder within seconds, propping it up against the wall.
"Noel!"
"What?"
"We- We can't climb up there! We'll get caught! We-"
"Simmer down! We're not gonna get caught. The view from up here is well worth it." He began to scale the rungs, climbing higher and higher. "Now hurry up! Get your little arse up here! What have you got to lose?"
You rolled your eyes and gave in. "You know, I wish you weren't so profane!"
To which comment, he simply responded with a playful 'up yours' gesture.
"Proves my point!"
And then you climbed the rickety, wooden ladder.
Soon, the two of you were sitting on the roof of the museum, feasting your eyes upon the world around you. The lights twinkled, like thousands of artificial stars that had fallen to the earth, mimicking the sky above. The wind was cold on your neck, so you adjusted your collar and did up the buttons on your coat; Noel wrapped an arm around your shoulders, and once more, you withered under his touch.
"Look at those two, having a snog against that window," he pointed his free hand over to the left, and you spotted the loved-up couple. "Oh... wait actually..." Noel leaned over, his breath warm against your cheek, and whispered in your ear. "I think they may be shagging."
You burst out laughing, catching a glimpse of your companion's smirk. "They'd better be careful not to break that glass during their little session of lovemaking."
"Wouldn't that be a fun anecdote though, hey? 'Smashing couple smash gallery window!'"
As your laughter petered out, you sighed, meeting Noel's eyes. Even here, in near-complete darkness, you could make out their icy cerulean tinge. He had the most beautiful countenance too.
"...Noel?" You questioned.
"Yeah?"
"Do you ever just... feel not good enough. Like... when you're a child, you don't worry about the future, you have so much confidence, you think there's nothing you can't do... you're fearless. But then you grow up... and you realise... you'll never live up to expectations. You'll never be talented enough, or you'll never be successful, or... you'll never meet someone who loves you for you-"
"Is that how you feel? Like you're not good enough?" His voice was solemn, serious, having lost its usual comic, flirtatious quality.
You turned away from him, nodding slightly, your eyes glazing over, as your focus revolved inward. It's true. You bit your lip, in an attempt to hold back the sudden urge to weep. Every day, you play it like you're okay, but deep down, you know there's a dark void... a void of loneliness.
As if on cue, you feel Noel wrap his arms around you, pulling you into his embrace, his chin resting on your shoulder. He rocks you gently, rubbing your back in an attempt to comfort you.
"Shhhh. It's okay. You're okay."
"I'm sorry. I'm just scared this will be all I'll ever be."
"...then you are perfect. Exactly as you are."
"What does that mean?"
"It means..." His eyes met yours, and time seemed to stop in its tracks. "I fancy you."
And then he kissed you. He simply pulled away from the embrace and pressed his lips to yours. As if he'd done it a million times before. It was candid, raw... sincere. And then he pulled away, as though regretting letting his impulses get the better of him.
"Shit! I am so, so sorry! I shouldn't-"
But before he could utter another word, you gripped his shoulders, and pulled him towards you filling in the space between your lips, with a series of messy, breathless pecks, growing more intense with each touch. You had never imagined this would actually happen, and yet you'd waited for it forever. His hands gripped your skull, his black painted nails entangling in your hair.
"Your hair's so soft. But..." he mumbled. "Not as good as mine."
"Shut up, Noel."
You felt his lips curl into a smirk against the skin of your cheek. And you couldn't help but giggle, turning your head slightly to meet his touch. Your insides doubled over as his cheeky mouth lavished yours, tongues dancing in the most passionate, most intimate of first unions. And yet his arms held you close with such care, such devotion, such fondness, his thumb absentmindedly caressing your shoulder.
Slowly, the kiss began to soften, gradually petering out, until Noel's nose rested against your own, taking a moment to catch his breath.
"I fancy you too." You gently pulled away, meeting his gaze. Somehow, his face seemed even more beautiful than before; he was so very... pretty - the way his cheekbones jutted through his skin; the sharp, yet vast plane that sat atop the bridge of his nose; the lustre of his blue irises, so bright they almost seemed out of place, what with the sable blackness of his hair.
Noel smiled at you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear tenderly.
"I rate that an eight and a half." He exclaimed, fingers now raking through his own hair.
"Pardon?"
"The kiss. Solid eight and a half."
"I'm offended, Noel. Only an eight?"
"Ah-ah, don't forget the half!"
"Piss off."
"Well..." and back was that cheeky smirk plastered on his face. "I never said you couldn't try again, did I?"
"You'll have to catch me first." You swung your legs back and over the edge, feet skimming the ladder rungs, as you practically jumped from the roof and started running to the car.
Noel followed suit, chasing after you. "I think you forget-"
You could hear his footsteps getting closer and closer, and so you ran faster, giddy with nerves; he truly made you feel like a teenager again.
"I-" And he lunged forward, wrapping his arms tightly around you. "Used to play football."
"Yeah, but you gave it up to go to art college, you nonce!"
Noel released you from his grasp, keeping one arm around your waist, as you embraced his shoulders. You strolled back the rest of the way to the car, as you caught your breath.
"Imagine if your old chavvy football mates saw you today." You said, "All jazzed up in your silver boots strutting about the country in your chelsea boots and 70s heels."
"They'd be fucking jealous of me."
"Would they?"
"Yeah. Cause I just kissed a pretty girl on the roof." Noel leaned over and gave your cheek a quick peck. "And that you're in my company, not theirs."
"I don't think I'd be their type."
"Well then, they're just missing out aren't they?" He stifled a chuckle.
"Noel..."
"Hmm?"
"Nothing. I just like saying your name."
"Y/n... Y/n... Y/n! Y/n! Y/n!!! I like shouting your name," he continued. "Y/n! Y/n!!! Y/n!!!!!"
You giggled. "Shhh! Julian will hear you all the way in Leeds!"
Noel grabbed your shoulders and pulled you into his embrace.
"Ahhh. Come on, let's get back."
You piled into his car and drove back to the flat, windows down, screaming your lungs out to Bowie.
‘and we climbed on to the roof, the museum and someone made love in the glass. and i forgot my name...’
#noel fielding#noel fielding x reader#vince noir x reader#vince noir#the mighty boosh#mighty boosh#noel fieldings luxury comedy#great british bake off#noel is a dilf
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Hi hi hi <3
What are some of your favourite songs?
well hello, leena, beloved 💕 thank you for asking
look. tbh i'm not that into music. i don't listen to much and no matter how hard i try i can never seem to find any music from niche artists unless i steal a song from someone else's playlist. for me, listening to music is an activity which i do by itself bc i can't concentrate when music is playing in the background, so i don't do it often. fucking hell it's taking me a while to get to the point.
BASICALLY expect popular songs and artists <3 some specific songs i've been absolutely loving recently are 'Streets' and 'Kiss Me More' by Doja Cat, 'Alejandro' by Lady Gaga, 'God is a woman' by Ariana Grande, 'Locked out of Heaven' by Bruno Mars, 'GUY.exe' by Superfruit, 'Blinding Lights' by The Weeknd, 'Hymn for the Weekend' by Coldplay, and some Fall Out Boy songs. some i hate, some i love (partly due to nostalgia). i've suddenly gotten really into ariana despite never really vibing with her music before, and i really adore doja cat. i don't stan any music artists currently, though.
uh. this is the leap of faith. no one better judge me otherwise you are a fucking loser and i will eat your left arm. i was a BTS stan for four years. i still really like them, i just don't stan them anymore. it's really fucking weird that i would fall for them when i don't even like music all that much overall, but. it happened. there's crack in their songs, i guess. currently some of my favourites of theirs are 'Euphoria', 'Pied Piper', 'Run BTS', 'Run' (a different song from 'Run BTS' lol), 'Black Swan', 'Heartbeat', 'Spring Day', 'Tomorrow', 'Ddaeng', 'My Universe', and 'The Astronaut' by member Jin. i still retain my encyclopaedic knowledge of their discography despite unstanning them a while ago. there is no escape.
if you don't know anything about them just watch this video i guess. (jfc i retain the urge to convert people into armys despite no longer being one.)
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TASK 002: PLAYLIST.
full playlist below !!
1. what’s a song you can put on repeat & never get tired of ?
i know the end by phoebe bridgers — "somewhere in germany, but i can't place it. man, i hate this part of texas, close my eyes, fantasize, three clicks and i'm home. when i get back, i'll lay around, then i'll get up and lay back down, romanticize a quiet life, there's no place like my room."
2. a song that instantly lifts your mood when you’re sad
cuff it by beyoncé — "bet you you'll see far, bet you you'll see stars, bet you you'll elevate, bet you you'll meet god, 'cause i feel like falling in love. i'm in the mood to fuck something up, we gonna fuck up the night."
3. your favorite song from your all-time favorite artist
nobody by mitski — "venus, planet of love was destroyed by global warming, did its people want too much too? did its people want too much? and i don't want your pity, i just want somebody near me, guess i'm a coward, i just want to feel alright."
4. a song that inspires or motivates you
mama by indigo — "hey mama, now you can lean on me, i'll always be by your side, hey mama, because you gave selflessly to me, because you were my support; hey mama, now you can believe in your son, you can smile."
5. what’s a song that reminds you of someone ?
fourth of july by sufjan stevens — "did you get enough love, my little dove, why do you cry? / shall we look at the moon, my little loon, why do you cry? make the most of your life, while it is rife, while it is light. well you do enough talk, my little hawk, why do you cry?"
6. the song that gets you in the mood to party
drunk-dazed by indigo — "honestly, i'm scared my reflection in the mirror is unfamiliar, the pitiful truth behind this mask, but i never escape. i feel it, my head's in a daze, daze, daze, i'm addicted, i replay, play, play."
7. your guilty pleasure
...baby one more time by britney spears — my loneliness is killing me (and i), i must confess i still believe (still believe), when i'm not with you i lose my mind, give me a sign, hit me baby one more time.
8. a song that’s out of your typical music preference
about you by the 1975 — "there was something about you that now i can't remember, it's the same damn thing that made my heart surrender, and i'll miss you on a train, i'll miss you in the morning, i never know what to think about."
9. what do you listen to when you’re in love ?
#1: yellow by coldplay — "your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones turn into something beautiful, and you know, for you, i'd bleed myself dry. for you, i'd bleed myself dry ... look at the stars, look how they shine for you, and all the things you do."
10. do you have song you’ve listened to all your childhood ?
welcome to the black parade by my chemical romance — "a world that sends you reeling from decimated dreams, your misery and hate will kill us all. so paint it black and take it back, let's shout it loud and clear, defiant to the end, we hear the call to carry on."
11. is there a song your parent/sibling/friend/etc. introduced you to that you love ?
slipping through my fingers by abba — "do i really see what's in her mind? each time i think i'm close to knowing, she keeps on growing, slipping through my fingers all the time; sometimes i wish that i could freeze the picture, and save it from the funny tricks of time."
12. a song you didn’t expect to like
satellite by harry styles — "i go 'round and 'round, satellite; spinning out, waiting for you to pull me in, i can see you're lonely down there, don't you know that i'm right here?"
13. what song would be your ‘intro’ music ?
lullaby by got7 — "if i'm dreaming, don’t ever wake me up, i wanna hear your melody, the only thing I could need. 'cause if i had to live without you i'd be lost, and in this moment i want more."
14. what song best represents your outward look — or your attitude towards life ?
rose-colored boy by paramore — "you say "we gotta look on the bright side" i say "well, maybe if you wanna go blind" you say my eyes are getting too dark now, but boy, you ain't ever seen my mind. just let me cry a little bit longer i ain't gonna smile if i don't want to."
15. the song with your favorite lyrics
funeral by phoebe bridgers — "i have this dream where i'm screaming underwater, while my friends are waving from the shore ... jesus christ, i'm so blue all the time, and that's just how i feel, always have and i always will. and it's 4am again and i'm doing nothing again."
inner child by indigo — "i wish we would smile more, it will be okay because today's me is doing fine. yesterday's you, now it's all clear, i want to hug the many thorns in the budding rose. the smiling kid, the child who was always laughing brightly, when i see you like that, i can't help smiling."
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I posted 990 times in 2022
532 posts created (54%)
458 posts reblogged (46%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@rothsorange
@catb-fics
@doomed-syko
@pacifymebby
@hankmoonbeam
I tagged 169 of my posts in 2022
#car mccannt’s wip weekends - 3 posts
#omfg - 2 posts
#catfish and the bottlemen - 2 posts
#robert keating - 2 posts
#inhaler - 2 posts
#it was so good man - 1 post
#simply because of how much it’s been memed - 1 post
#we had this in our catfish gc - 1 post
#and idk i just feel very passionately about wonderwall of all songs - 1 post
#and if you think about it it’s actually oddly really romantic - 1 post
Longest Tag: 138 characters
#and sometimes if i’m going on a long journey or know i’m gonna be sat around for a long time doing nothing with no wifi i’ll use notes app
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
ATTENTION
it is my birthday :)
thank you for your attention <3
8 notes - Posted January 7, 2022
#4
lastly maybe something based of sparks by coldplay for bobby?
A/N: here’s a little bit of I guess a hurt/comfort drabble but the hurt is not shown, just mentioned lmao ik it’s not really based on the song per se but it is worked into it so I hope you still like it 🥺
You hadn’t spoken for 3 days at this point, and the guilt and anxiety was gnawing away at your nerves. What if you’d truly scared him off for good this time? What if you’d really fucked up and upset him, past the point of being fixed by an apology. You couldn’t believe you’d fallen out over something so stupid but that’s what unrequited love does to you, you supposed. You were still coming to terms with your feelings for Rob and figuring out the best way to tell him, which unfortunately left you snapping at him when he asked if you were okay and he said some hurtful things in retaliation, which clearly he felt bad about afterwards.
A knock on the door startled you out of your thoughts and you almost sloshed your coffee all over your lap as you rushed to answer it. You took a moment to compose yourself, seeing the obscured figure through the frosted glass and trying to figure out who it could be at 7 in the morning. Tall, looked they were holding a guitar, shifting nervously from foot to foot- wait, a guitar?
You yanked open the door then, and sure enough there was Bobby breathing a sigh of relief and letting his smoke go. “Thank god,” he said, a hint of a smile on his face “for a second there I was scared you weren’t gonna answer.”
“Why? You know me, I’m ranked number one in the world for fastest door opener.” You joked, thinking back to a conversation you’d had where he called you that. But the joke fell flat and didn’t do much to ease either of your nerves.
“Well I kinda thought I was the last person you wanted to see today.”
“And I thought you hated my guts.”
And that seemed to hit a nerve. He frowned in confusion before taking another drag of his cigarette.
“What? I- no, no, I don’t, why would I- look can we just talk? Well actually I wanted to play you a song I learnt yesterday. If you’ll let me. Or you can slam the door in my face and tell me to go away forever, I’ll understand.” Rob was stumbling over his words, blue eyes constantly flicking between yours and the floor. You smiled then.
“Go on then, I’d love to hear it.”
He promptly discarded his cigarette then and sat himself on the front step of your porch, patting the concrete for you to join him as he began to strum the opening chords. You thought you could vaguely make out the song, something by Coldplay, but you couldn’t say which one.
“You can sing along you know.” He smirked, not looking up from where his fingers met the frets.
“I don’t know the words Bobby!” You giggled, giving him a little nudge with your elbow but not enough so it would muck up his playing. He just shook his head and took a deep breath.
“Did I drive you away? I know what you’ll say. You say oh, sing one we know.”
And it was then you realised that this was his apology. This was his love confession.
“But I promise you this, I’ll always look out for you. Yeah that’s what I’ll do.”
The lyrics matched you both so well that you imagined him tediously skipping through spotify the night before, trying to find the perfect song to make it up to you. Not to mention how he must’ve spent hours just learning it non stop and it was all for you. Because he cares about you. You turned bright red as you reflected on how stupid you were to think for so long that he couldn’t love you the way you wanted him to, but here was the man of your dreams on your doorstep serenading you. Well, if that’s not how you want to be loved then you have to be crazy.
“I said ohhhhhh, I cry ohhhhhh...
yeah I saw sparks”
8 notes - Posted July 17, 2022
#3
I love the symphonic pictures EP so much too, it’s incredible how talented and creative they were even from that young age with all the layered instrumentation and everything…he’s amazing.
Anyway, do you k ow if the lyrics are published somewhere? I love Johnny’s singing but he doesn’t enunciate very well, especially on Bootstrap Paradox 😆
I love how you can really hear their influences too. Like when they said they like Beck for example i was like ?? ok cause i didn’t really know anything about him but then i heard Loser by chance on the radio one day and it all sort of clicked. I was like ”holy shit yeah this does sound like something symphonic pictures would make”
I haven’t been able to find official lyrics posted anywhere no, but i can sort of decipher some of them?
But it’s actually Dale singing on Bootstrap Paradox haha Bondy only sings on Feathers and Backwoods and Dale also sings Smile it’s Real :)
9 notes - Posted June 22, 2022
#2
What are your favourite things about Bondy?
UGH WHAT A QUESTION ANON WOW
okay okay SO MANY THINGS the fact he has so many hobbies other than music ?!?! He’s literally so talented it’s insane like if he were alive in the 1600s or whatever then historians would describe him as a very well educated man yk? Not to mention he’s just very knowledgeable on a range of subjects like not even just music but like other cultures and politics and all that kinda cool stuff. But also he balances being incredibly smart with being a man child and having the greatest comebacks and insults ever and just an insane sense of humour (and mega stoner™️)
I also love how he went to do music at uni but then decided it just straight up wasn’t for him and then (Not sure if he dropped out or finished the course anyway) went and started Symphonic Pictures to fill that void cause I’m at that point in life where everyone’s tryna shove Uni in your face and not really presenting you with other options but I always remember that the majority of my favourite musicians and people I look up to didn’t go to Uni and they’re doing fine so that’s quite a comfort and reassurance to me
ALSO LET’S NOT FORGET HOW MANY BANDS THIS MAN HAS BEEN IN CAUSE IT’S LIKE 7 OR SOMETHING INSANE
ALSO ALSO HE WAS PART OF ONE OF THE LAST BANDS TO LITERALLY SUPPORT OASIS BEFORE THEY SPLIT ?!,!!? THAT’S INSANE TO THINK ABT AND THE MAN WAS 19 A FEW DAYS AWAY FROM 20 AND HE ACHIEVED SO MUCH LIKE WOW
Sorry I get really rambly but generally if you ask me what my fave things about bondy are it’s always his character I instantly go to rather than “he‘s hot” 💀
12 notes - Posted March 12, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Do you think Van and Bondy ever had an actual physical knuckle-to-jaw fight?
Genuinely? I don’t think so, just hear me out 😭
I think they’re all immature to some degree, but definitely no way immature enough to start assaulting each other. I just cannot see Bondy getting annoyed to the point of actually punching one of his bandmates especially over something as small as whatever they’ve been arguing about. I can’t see Van striking out either tbh.
I will say though, in the worst worst case scenario, if they were to ever get physical with each i put my money on substances being involved because i just cannot imagine them in their sober state of minds to think fighting each other is the right thing to do. They had to be drunk or coked up or something.
13 notes - Posted May 21, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#Yikessss yeah this blog is definitely dying 💀
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sa-yo-na-ra
pairing - ash x eiji
genre - angst
warnings - violence, blood, major character death.
word count - 1k+
summary : based on an alternate universe where eiji died when he was shot.
(i was listening to yellow - coldplay while writing this so i'd recommend y'all to listen to that too !!)
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さよなら ( • goodbye )
ash gripped his pencil tight as he tried to write the foreign letters on the piece of paper eiji provided him; eiji's smaller hands on his as he guided him to write more easily.
"how do you say this word and what does it mean?"
ash asked, slightly tilting his head to the left as curiosity sparkled in his eyes to which eiji felt himself drowning in his gorgeous, jade orbs. at the sight of ash snapping his fingers in front of his face, eiji realized that he was day dreaming before quickly shaking his head, trying to get out of his head space to answer ash's question.
"oh, it's 'sa-yo-na-ra'. it means 'goodbye' " he smiled as ash furrowed his eyebrows, trying to pronounce the new word he had just learnt. after a few rough trials, he smiled brightly,
"sa-yo-na-ra!"
his proud smile made eiji feel warm and giddy inside. it made him want to pull him into his arms tightly, protecting him from the cruel world he lives in and never letting him go. he smiled up at the younger boy, praising him for his almost perfect pronunciation.
he pulled the discarded pencil and paper back towards him to scribble a few words in japanese and its english translation on it as something caught his eye.
"ASH LOOK OUT-"
numb. he felt numb all over. 'what's happening?' eiji thought as the sudden numbness turned into a harsh, piercing pain in his chest as he felt himself falling backwards. 'wh-why… does it hurt so much all of a sudden?'
out of pure instinct, he turned towards ash, his vision turning blurry as he struggled to breathe, squinting his eyes to try and make out ash's face. he brought his hand up to hold his chest, trying to lessen the pain as he felt a sticky liquid all over.
'oh,' he thought, staring at his blood-covered hand as he looked back up at ash.
"EIJI !! eiji look at me !! you're going to be fine just-"
'huh? what is ash saying?' he tried to focus his eyes on him but he could barely make out the specks of green or the splash of blonde. oh, how he loved that shade of green.
ash felt his hands shake uncontrollably at the sight of eiji bleeding out in front of him. he felt a sharp pang in his chest. 'please… not you too…' he thought as he cried, tears running down his cheeks as he tried to stop the bleeding.
he knew he wouldn't make it. he hated himself for knowing but there was just no way anyone could survive a direct bullet to the heart. ash felt his throat tightening painfully, choking on sobs as his tears fell on eiji's face while he could do nothing. nothing but watch the face of his best friend, no, lover- drain itself of all colour.
'why, why, WHY?! why would you push me out of the way?! why would you hurt yourself for me?! why would you take that damn bullet for me?!'
"a..ash…"
he looked up at eiji's face as he realized he had tucked himself to the crook of his neck, those beautiful green eyes eiji loved, now red from crying. he watched with pained eyes as eiji tried to lift his hand up, cupping ash's face softly as he whispered,
"for you, i'd do this all over again.."
ash pressed eiji's cold hand against his cheek, desperately trying to warm it back up, trying to bring back the shy, smiley boy who was just holding his hands, caring for him in a way no one had ever before. as eiji's hand started to grow limp, he felt his blood run cold.
eiji… he wasn't breathing anymore.
ash felt his mind blank out, his body moving in auto-pilot as he felt himself getting up on his feet, pulling out the smith & wesson revolver out of the waistband of his jeans as he walked out of the room.
catching sight of the man who shot eiji, who was now trying to run for his life; he lifted his arm up, aimed and pulled the trigger; shooting his lower back as he screamed out in pain, falling face first on the hard, wooden floor.
his whole world started to blur. 'you… you killed him… the one person who cared.. who gave me hope in this stupid place.. YOU KILLED HIM!'. ash couldn't think straight. all he could see was eiji's soft, innocent face smiling up at him as he shot the immobile man under him mercilessly.
ash's eyes were cold and lifeless, his mind was blank. he didn't care when sing tried to stop him, he didn't care when lao tried to shoot him, he couldn't care about anything anymore. 'why bother? eiji is… he's dead.'
he found himself walking back to the room where eiji was trying to teach him japanese. he felt his body drop to the floor with a loud thud, his knees landing right beside eiji's now motionless body as he felt his heart being ripped out of his chest.
'he didn't deserve it… it should have been me… why, why would you do that? for someone as unworthy as me?'
sing's heart ached for ash, never having seen the blonde in such a vulnerable situation before as he felt guilty. it was one of his men that killed eiji. he hadn't noticed his own eyes welling up with tears as he stared at ash's heartbreaking state, scared to approach him.
ash reached forward, slightly brushing eiji's hair off his face and cupping it ever so gently to look at him better, another wave of fresh tears crashing over him as he bit his quivering lip.
'i promised i'd protect you. i'm sorry i couldn't. god, i'm so fucking sorry. i'm just not meant to be happy and i'm so sorry i dragged you into my world. you deserved so much better than- than someone like me..' ash whispered softly as his voice cracked.
he regretted everything. he regretted getting close to him, regretted befriending him, regretted finding comfort in him. eiji was dead and he wasn't coming back and it broke him more than anything.
'i didn't even get to say i love you…'
#banana fish#ash lynx#asheiji#ash x eiji#anime / manga#banana fish manga#banana fish angst#anime angst#banana fish fandom#banana fish fanfiction#banana fish fanart#banana fish fic#banana fish max#banana fish ash#banana fish eiji#banana fish ending#banana fish au#alternate universe#banana fish art#banana fish anime#friends to lovers#friends to lovers au#requests open#reqs open#Spotify
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Heather.
Word Count: 2k
Category: Angst
Warning: Language? idk
Request: pls write an angst based on Heather by Conan gray i love ur writings sm
Summary: In which Harry is the Heather of his own story.
this won’t have a second part, let’s keep it sad 💀
thanks for requesting, anon! hope you like it and thank you sm🤍
// masterlist //
..
You were there for as long as Harry could remember, and that was so many years.
He was convinced that many scriptwriters and directors heard of your friendship’s story and that was how most rom-coms were made.
But the rom-coms had something that Harry was yet to have – the happy ending he kept wishing for.
It wasn’t your fault, really. Sure, you were a little oblivious but it was also a little unfair saying that was the only reason why Harry hadn’t gotten his happy ending because he knew that at the end of the day, it was him not making a move and admitting his feelings for you throughout all these years.
Harry remembered how for his 16th birthday, you had saved up to get him and yourself tickets to see Coldplay live.
He remembered how you cried as you hugged him after his X Factor audition as you all stood backstage.
He remembered how excited he was when he first introduced you to the rest of the boys when they were put in a band. Hell, you slept over with them at Robin’s for a couple of days.
He remembered how you flew out for the weekend when Zayn had left the band, knowing that Harry needed your presence.
He remembered how you were the first person he went to when he decided to make a debut solo record.
He remembered waking up to your singing in Jamaica, munching on honey toast as your face would light up the moment he came to view – “Good morning, H! I squeezed some fresh oranges for you.”
He also remembered how his face would heat up when he was just a kid whenever his family would mention that you and him were bound to end up together.
He remembered how his first heartbreak wasn’t from a relationship of his own, but it was when you got into one at 16. He hated it.
He remembered helping you with your dates, reacting to how you thought a new crush was, holding you as you cried.
Harry remembered how despite being in love with you since he was a teenager, he didn’t take a step towards having you more than a best friend.
And God, his journals were proof of that love; the love songs, all those ones about unrequited love, the short poems he wrote in the dead of the night.
He had cringed when he told you that he was seeing someone, only to have you become excited and genuinely happy for him.
If you could do it, why couldn’t he?
He was staying over at yours, a normal occurrence for when he was home. He could’ve as well just sold his house at that point.
“Have anything I can wear? This isn’t too comfortable.” He had asked you as the both of you lounged, watching a stand-up comedy.
“Yeah, just choose whatever you want.” You nonchalantly said, not caring if he went through your clothes – not like this was anything but normal for the both of you.
“Too lazy to move.” He mumbled, looking up at you from where he was; his head resting on your lap as you played with his hair.
The smile that came to your face was one Harry mirrored without knowing, staring at you as you continued to watch the show. “I’m not moving.” You stated.
He groaned, standing up, “Will you still play with my hair when I come back?”
At that, your eyes moved to him, “Yes, you baby.”
That was all the assurance he needed before he walked to your room and opened your wardrobe, going through your clothes without messing anything up; you liked your clothes neatly folded at all times.
Reaching one lilac sweater, Harry took it out before holding it over his upper body, finding that it would probably perfectly fit.
Taking off his own top and putting on yours, Harry’s breath instantly hitched in his throat, stomach tied up in knots.
It smelled like you.
It smelled like fresh vanilla detergent and the coconut scent he adored so much.
Running his hand slowly across his body, Harry turned to look at the mirror, eyes falling on the item that screamed your name louder than the beaded necklace you had made him months ago that decorated his neck – “Golden, because that’s what I think you are” you had said.
He gulped, fingertips grazing the material.
“Harry! You’re missing all the good bits!”
“Coming!” He shouted back, hoping you didn’t catch the crack in his voice.
After one final look, Harry had walked back to you, placing his head on your lap.
“Good choice.” You had commented softly.
“Yeah?” Harry almost whispered, “Feels comfortable. What material is that?”
“Just polyester,” you shrugged, “Hate how it looks better on you though.” You had joked, giving him a gentle tug to his hair.
Harry had giggled, closing his eyes as you scratched his scalp softly, “Thanks.”
After that day, it was like Harry claimed the sweater. He’d beeline to it the moment he stepped a foot in your house, frowning at you on some days when you told him that it was getting washed.
Days turned to weeks, and before Harry could do as much as blink, you were back from your work with a smile brighter than usual.
He was sitting on your couch that day, in the lilac sweater, a smile drawn to his face as soon as his saw yours, pausing the music that was playing from his laptop. “You look happy.”
And you were, because you had given his cheek a soundly smooch of greeting, unaware of Harry’s cheeks reddening.
You hummed with a nod, “I have a date tonight with, quite possibly, the cutest person I have ever met.”
He wasn’t expecting that.
Harry was not expecting that.
His smile faltered, only staring at you.
“They’re just,” you sighed, staring at the ceiling with a hand to your heart, “A dream, you know? Hey, wait! You know them!”
“I do?”
“Yeah,” you nodded eagerly, “Chelsea introduced them when we went to that pub 2 weeks ago, remember? Charlie?”
“Oh.”
And he did. He remembered how pretty Charlie was, how they seemed to keep conversations going and made sure everyone was listened to, how Charlie’s style stood out in the pub, how their jokes made everyone laugh – including him. He remembered how Charlie’s eyes lingered on you when you talked, how the both of you seemed dived into a conversation of common interests. He hated it.
Charlie really was a dream. Yeah, he hated that, too.
Harry had helped you decide on an outfit, his chest feeling as if it clenched around his heart to a point where his cage would combust.
He helped you with your hair, spraying the back of it for you because you had always complained about not reaching that part well.
Fuck, he even painted your nails that night – they were in lilac.
And he was there when Charlie picked you up, a genuine smile on their face that looked nothing like the petty one he wore.
“Do you need us to bring you anything, mate? We’re having Italian.” Charlie had offered.
Why did Charlie have to be kind and polite? What happened to the assholes they portrayed in rom-coms?
“No, thanks, Y/N made me lasagna earlier.” Harry had chuckled, watching you smile at the interaction.
“Go to sleep by 9, Mr.” You had joked as you left, Charlie’s hand on your back.
“You know it.” Harry had mumbled with a weak smile, giving you a nod.
By 7, Harry was almost sure he yanked all his hair out, despite the mirrors assuring him that he didn’t.
By 8, he tried to eat, but the nauseous feeling that ran through his body at the thought of you with someone else made him put the casserole back in the fridge.
By 9, Harry had called Mitch to break the news of your newest date, only to hang up so soon when Mitch was beginning to tell him how he still might have a chance.
By 10, he wrote a song. One full song.
By 11, he had the tune for it.
By 12, Harry watched you kiss someone who wasn’t him and he had no one to blame.
“How was it?” He managed to utter, watching you stand against the door with the widest smile.
“Perfect.”
That was the beginning of everything but what Harry wished upon a constellation for, because by the second month of you seeing Charlie, you had made it official.
Charlie was perfect in all aspects; hell, even Gemma liked them when she met them as the 4 of you had brunch one day.
But then Charlie was around your house more that Harry just wasn’t that comfortable to sleep over anymore.
He remembered how the three of you were watching a movie one night, Charlie having been wanting to get to know Harry more since he was “someone Y/N talks about and loves so much” – Charlie said that with no drop of pettiness, Harry wondered how they did it – when Harry just couldn’t take any more of you cuddling someone who wasn’t him and before you and Charlie could process it, Harry was out with an empty excuse – “I forgot my guitar at Mitch’s.”
His guitar was resting against the very couch he was sitting on.
But nothing prepared him for that one moment.
Charlie had invited him for the barbecue party they were hosting and if it weren’t for your puppy eyes, Harry would’ve been sulking in the comfort of his house and not in his car while he was on the way to oh-so-perfect Charlie’s.
He heard Lizzo playing the moment he got out of his car, and it was how he knew that it was your playlist playing.
He had brought cake with him, walking cautiously with the boxed dessert in his hands.
The door was opened, a few smiling people passing by him before he was met with yours, only as always, your face lit up once you saw him.
“You’re here!” You didn’t care that he was holding anything in his hands that restrained him from hugging you back because you threw your arms around him, leaving a kiss to his cheek, “Everyone’s been asking for you. Something about how it was weird seeing me without you.” You giggled.
“Partners in crime, eh?” He smiled at you, referring to the phrase you have been using with one another since school.
“You bet,” you wiggled your eyebrows, “Oh, shoot, sorry, didn’t notice you had this. Um, come, let’s put it in the kitchen.”
You were comfortable in Charlie’s house, Harry noticed. It was no surprise; he would’ve been more worried if you weren’t seen as you had been together for 6 months.
Placing the cake in the fridge, you and Harry then walked to where everyone was.
And that was when he saw it.
Charlie lied on a lounge chair, laughing and looking all attractive, in the very lilac, polyester sweater Harry had found comfort in.
He watched as you walked over, Charlie instantly putting a hand to your waist as they smiled up at you before you leaned down, pressing your lips against one another.
“Act natural, would you?” He heard Chelsea’s, a mutual friend, voice beside him.
“What?”
“If you can’t be happy for Y/N, try to act natural around them,” Chelsea sighed, her heart breaking for her friend as she looked at Harry who was yet to move his eyes from the couple, “Charlie’s great, you know?”
“Yeah,” he gave her a dry chuckle, “Yeah, I know.”
“Then why aren’t you happy that at least they’re not an asshole?”
“Just,” Harry looked at his friend, a defeated look on his face before the sound of you squealing gleefully grabbed his attention, watching as Charlie had their arms wrapped around you from behind, the both of you laughing as your friends all smiled in awe, “Just wish I were Charlie.”
#harry styles imagine#harry styles#harry styles angst#harry styles angst imagine#heather#harry styles angst one shot#harry styles one shot#bestfriend!harry
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I'm going through a little bit of heartbreak, do you think you could write me something happy?
I am so sorry about that anon, i hope you feel better soon. I woke up at 6 am and this is the first thing i saw so its better if its the first productivd thing i do today too 😊 I hope this chaotic drama Everlark drabble thingy makes you smile🤗
All of me
Loves all of you
Loves your curves and all your edges
As soon as Katniss recognizes the song, she lets out a loud, un-ladylike snort.
"Seriously, Peeta? The only thing you were in charge of for our wedding were the damn songs!"
"Hey! They strong armed me into picking this song. Said i can choose all the others of we dance to this," Peeta pouts and she laughs.
"Its a four minute long song!" Katniss protests and Peeta opens his mouth to say something bu then closes it and smirks like the Satan himself.
"How do you know how long the song is of you hate it as much as you claim?" Her new husband asks and she turns red in the face.
"I have my ways," she huffs but Peeta can see her lips twitching in a barely concealed smile.
"Those ways may not involve listening to said song?" He retorts and she buries her face in his shirt, shaking in silent laughter.
Peeta doesnt need to see since he knows she's red to the tips of her toes.
Oh angels sent from up above
"Yes!" Thd bride pulls away and fistbumps her left fist making the onlookers snort.
Realizing she got caught doing that she changes gears quickly.
"Oh um, Coldplay, i didnt know you were into coldplay..." she trails off, looking at Peeta as if he had to answer.
"Nope, i am not, i am into Demi Lovato," he says before belting.
"If i ever did that
I think I'll have a heart attaaaaaaaaa-aaaack" by the time he had reached the middle if the long 'attack' he was barely croaking and the guests were having laughing fits.
"At least I made your dad smile," he chuckles sheepishly and Katniss stares at her father who is looking mildly amused.
"Who the fuck gave you the idea you can sing, Mellark you're voice is a hazard to our hearing and glass objects!" Gale slurred, giving Peeta a too-hard-to-be-friendly shove.
"Leave him alone Gale, go back and shove your tongue down Madge's throat," Katniss snarks and Gale turns red.
"You messed with me, I'll mess with you," drunk Gale is a vengeful SOB.
Turning to the guests, he loudly says,
"I want to share some funny times where our beloved Catpiss and her husband Pita bread were caught making goo goo eyes at each other when she was just ten!"
Peeta cringes, knowing it was gonna be bad.
"He would trip all over himself when she came to the bakery and pretend to look busy with cheesbuns because we all know, Katniss loves 'em more than her husbands co-cock!" Gale yells and the newlyweds groan loudly.
"And he totally fantasized about smeaing her with melted cheese and gobbling her like a life sized cheesbun, i have evidence!" He yells and the guests gasp (but of course the loudest gasps were from the overdramatic Mrs Mellark and amused Mrs Everdeen) Even Prim was trying to stifle ber laughter as Gale's phone was passed around.
When it reaches the red faced couple, Peeta quickly snatches the phone and shows it to his wife.
It was a picture of them kissing with their faces and hands smeared with cheese.
"Oh for God's sake we were only trying to be cheesy!" Katniss yells and Peeta snorts at the accuracy of her comment.
"Lets not forget the cheese i licked off your-" his horny ass words were cut off by a knockout punch from an angry ass father.
"Anything else we should know?" Mr Everdeen asks, standing with a foot pressed to the unconscious blond's chest.
"I am...pregnant?" She asks and Prim mock faints.
"Are you asking or telling?" Her father demanded but before she could contemplate a suitable answer-
"Katniss!" A woman shrieks making her cringe as a loud wailing followed.
"He wouldnt stop crying," Delly says apologetically, handing a screaming toddler over while a four year old girl ran from under Delly's dress, heading straight for the incredulous Mr Everdeen.
"Hi, I am Willow Everdeen-Mellark, you must be my mama's papa," the girl says with a smile as Peeta comes back to his senses.
"Daddy!" The brunette girl squealed, literally jumping on Peeta's chest and hugging him tight because of course she was a daddy's girl.
"Someone explain what the fuck is going on!" bellows a white-haired man in fine clothing.
"Grandpa Snow," Katniss whispers as the man stalks towards the Everdeen-Mellarks.
"So you were screwing the brains out of my granddaughter, werent you?" The man asked Peeta and he swallowed.
"Oh boy, this is gonna be so memorable!" Gale slurs, pulling his phone out to record the confrontation.
#Anon ask#Hope you feel better soon#Everlark drabble#Toastbabies#Weddings and receptions#Just some mindless fun#Lemme know what you think#Lol#Everlark#Stella writes
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nico — a playlist made by me
listen, every time I listen to any of these songs I keep thinking of nico and his relationship with lewis so bear with me and let me explain why👇🏻
1. Unfucktheworld, Angela Olsen
The whole situation with lewis tired nico relentlessly so he needed a break to take care of himself.
It’s not just me for you I have to look out too
I have to save my life
I need some peace of mind
2. We own the sky, M83
nico dreamed all his life to race in f1 with lewis, and as a child everything seemed possible.
Each shade of blue
Is kept in our eyes
Keep blowing and lightning
Because we own the sky
But then things started to fall apart between them and there was no chance to go backwards.
Can’t we change our minds?
We kill what we build
3. The wolves (act i and ii), Bon Iver
(God this song fits both of them so well. it goes better with lewis’ perspective but humour me for this time.)
nico felt betrayed by lewis’ attitude and he was resentful. He hopesone day lewis will understand how much he hurt him.
Someday my pain will mark you
And when he will, nicowill take comfort in that, so he suggests lewis to just go ahead and finish him.
Solace my game
It stars you
Swing wide your crane, swing wide your crane
And run me through
nico reflects in hindsight how many moments they could have had but now it’s all vanished and Lewis won’t hear from him anymore.
What might have been lost (don’t bother me)
4. The great escape, Patrick Watson
The situation exhausted nico to his limits so he needed to escape, even if he loves racing so much.
Puts on a smile and breathes it in
And breathes it out, he says
Bye bye, bye to all of the noise
5. Many ways, Bombat Bicycle Club
nico doesn’t know if he is doing the right choice and can’t sleep because of it.
She said you’re stirring
Tossing, turning
But Vivian reassures him and says he is doing the right thing.
I’m sure your choice is right
Nonetheless, nico thinks he is a coward from running away and thinks there are other possibilities to make up for it.
I’ve always been a coward
Been a coward this day
There are many ways this way
6. See you soon, Coldplay
Nico has lost trust in himself and he scolds himself because he shouldn’t have fallen in love in the first place.
So you lost your trust
And you never should have
He tries to go on. He protects himself (with the bulletproof vest) from hurting again.
In a bulletproof vest
With the windows all closed
I’ll be doing my best
he watches Lewis from afar “in a telescope lens” and hopes they'll be friends again very soon.
And when all you want is friends
I’ll see you soon
7. Old friend, Mitski
Nico understands how childish was to make an insignificant thing like racing divide them.
We nearly drowned
For such a silly thing
And now that they have both someone better to take care of them they can go back being what they were, even if it means only friendship.
I’ll take coffee and talk about nothing baby
At blue diner I’ll take anything you want to give me, baby
8. Ran away, Coldplay
Another song about nico avoiding the situation with lewis.
I ran away from you
That’s all I ever do
People said to him not to mess up things, not to leave, that is stupid and won’t solve anything and yet he did it.
Everyone I know
Says I’m a fools to mess with you
And everyone I know
Says it’s such a stupid thing to do
9. Atmosphere, Joy Division
They try to talk but it’s impossible to rebuild what they lost.
Endless talking
Life rebuilding
Don’t walk away
Nico pleads lewis to stay even if he knows it’s hopeless
Don’t turn away in silence
Your confusion
My illusion
Worn like a mask of self hate
10. The Bourne identity, The Last Shadow Puppets
(okay this is the most Nico song ever written so bear with me for just a little longer)
Nico understands that his insecurities are ruining his relationship with lewis. He always feels smaller compared to lewis’ grandness and he masks his doubts with confidence, like he usually does when he answers journalists question. He creates another new person, but now this facade is cracking and it’s revealing his true self and he hates it.
He’s kind of my enemy
Whenever I’m on to something good you see
He always wanted in to spoil it for me
That’s because the relationship with lewis makes him do this. He doesn’t need to hide with him, so he keeps cracking and cracking.
Glass bottomed ego
Still afloat but can’t you see the cracking appearing in the base?
He always scolds himself for this and for the mistakes he makes. He beats himself up so much that nothing will be left in the end.
Let’s just have a buzz because by the time I’m done fucking beating myself up there will nothing left love
So he leaves. He doesn’t want Lewis to see him like this.
Yeah I’ll be leaving now, I’m making tracks
And I doubt that I’ll be coming back.
If you made it this far thank you for your attention. Hope you enjoyed the songs and the explanations as much as I did🤍
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dick winters and eugene roe for the character meme
OH HECK YEAH
Winters
favorite thing about them
i am literally obsessed with everything about him but if i had to pick a favorite thing it would be that he is actually very kind! he cares so much even if he doesn't always show it! it's cute!
least favorite thing about them
I don't think I dislike anything about him, he's my dream man
favorite line
He had so many great ones, but that bit on D-Day about promising God to live a peaceful life if he made it through the war....i fuck with that real hard
brOTP
Winters and Nixon! These two have such a great rapport, and I think Nix's friendship allows Dick to let loose a little! It's sweet :)
OTP
Dick and Melanie Davis, my OC. I ship these two real hard.
nOTP
Okay I don't think this is a thing anymore but back when I first joined the BoB fandom (in like 2014/2015) there was a subgroup that shipped Winters and Sobel and that shit had me fucked up I hated it so much
random headcanon
He's got a little sister, but he doesn't fall into the gross "protective older brother" stereotype who gets weird about her going on dates or whatever. I have this as part of my fic, actually.
unpopular opinion
I don't think I have one?
song i associate with them
The Good Ones by Gabby Barrett
favorite picture of them
This might seem like a weird choice since there are so many shots of him looking fine as hell (which he is) but this scene cracks me up every single time without fail because it's so laughably human and it's one of his most expressive moments.
this is getting long so Roe under the cut!
Roe
favorite thing about them
cliché but it's the voice and accent for me like hoo boy
least favorite thing about them
i know he's angsty but i really think he frowns too much but THATS IT I SWEAR I LOVE HIM
favorite line
My favorite and most underrated in my opinion is when after Hoobler shoots himself, Roe goes "Did you think it was a German leg, Hoob?" which I find so fucking funny like what??? sir??? this man is dying???
brOTP
There is the subtlest friendship between Winters and Roe and I am lowkey obsessed with it.
OTP
Roe and Lina Grace @vintagelavenderskies's OC. I haven't read the full fic but from what I know already I'm like, yeah I ship these two and when I read that fic I know I will SUFFER with their slow burn
nOTP
I don't think I have one for him
random headcanon
I feel like Roe is a good kisser. Is it the accent? The French? His mouth? I dunno, but the vibe is there.
unpopular opinion
I don't understand the appeal of Baberoe as a ship at all. I've watched this show probably twenty times and I do not get it.
song i associate with them
Another cliché but Fix You by Coldplay
favorite picture of them
This picture is too damn cute it should be illegal
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Antis losing it saying JM is Hybe's favorite and most protected. You mean most shit on, right? The one who gets the most hate and it continues. Guess y'all want him to kill himself. Guess you've never seen someone suffer from panic attacks, like JM has clear signs of. My mom was an alcoholic, not how JM acts. JM was not shown during CP thing tonight, he didn't even get his solo line & he was kept in the dark during Butter once again. Y'all desperately want JM gone, but Tae will leave if he does.
People love tossing in the idea of suicide like it’d automatically make their argument 10x stronger. Newsflash, I don’t care about your feelings, and I’m not here to be politically correct. I’d also never wish death on anyone. Except faceless vile anons. Fuck you guys. Jump in front of traffic. Jump off a bridge.
As for jimin, I’d never wish death on jimin. Really that’s crossing the line. I wouldn’t wish death on my worst enemy much less some dude I don’t even know. I’m only presenting things about Jimin that have been backed by video proof and numerous speculations. Whether he’s an alcoholic or not is none of my business. If he wants to drink the night away then by all means have fun. It’s his life.
And again with the excuses for Jimin. I’ve already shared my thoughts on this topic, so I won’t bother repeating myself. Yoongi experienced panic attacks too but you don’t see him using his mental health as an excuse to be rude and vile (God I think I’ve said that word more times on this blog than I’ve ever said in my entire life, buts it’s the perfect word to describe Jimin. That and the word disgusting).
Jimin and his fans need to GROW UP. At some point you all will learn to hold a 25 year old MAN accountable. Jimin doesn’t get a solo line in ONE song and all of a sudden it’s panic attacks and suicide warnings. Lmaoooo yet you all still hold Hoseok to the sunshine agenda and he had ZERO lines in Spring Day. Not to mention Hoseok, Jin, and Taehyung have HISTORICALLY had the least lines in BTS’s OT7 songs. But where was the sudden mass outcry for them huh? Speak into the mic anon otherwise miss me with the bullshit.
I’m glad Hoseok got the dance break in Butter. He did fantastic and it’s one of the highlights of the entire performance. I’m also glad My Universe was as jimin-less as possible. His vocals didn’t suit the song anyways :) Or does the whole “they choose their own lines agenda” not apply to Jimin? :) My Universe is also Coldplay’s song before it’s BTS’s song. You should respect their decisions and stop trying to insert Jimin into everything. Watch the ‘My Universe’ Documentary for yourself. Chris Martin himself distributed the lines out to the members.
In the first place, the only reason Jimin has more lines in their other songs isn’t because he can sing, it’s because their main producer pdogg is obsessed with screechy high notes and autotune. If pdogg had any say in the final production of My Universe, Jimin’s shitty vocals would’ve ruined the entire song.
I also don’t care about BTS disbanding so the whole “Tae will leave if he does” argument does nothing for me. I could honestly make a list of the members who would greatly benefit from going solo, but we’ll save that for another post. Here’s a hint though: Jimin isn’t one of them.
#bts#supop thoughts#park jimin#bts jimin#jimin#seokjin#taehyung#jungkook#hoseok#kim seokjin#jeon jungkook#jung hoseok#coldplay#my universe#pdogg
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Could you maybe recommend some good fics?
Okay mom, this is the list of the best things I’ve read ! And because I am incapable of choosing only a few, there is like 100 fics in there, it’s crazy. I’m a fucking mess, it’s a fucking mess, there are all amazing fics and I have no self-control so take it all 😂 (please appreciate it, I spent so loooong on it ! 😂)
For anyone reading this, here’s an important note I need to make before we start : this only comes from my opinion, with ships I like and my own preferences in themes. If one of your fics or a fic you liked is in there, well good for you because I loved it ! And if it’s not, it doesn’t mean that it’s bad or anything like that, just that I haven’t read it or that I missed it yesterday when me and my tired eyes went through the historic of the THOUSANDS of fics I’ve ever read in the fandom, it’s a fucking lot and I surely missed some.
Also, some fics are locked so if you don’t have an account, you won’t be able to see them.
I tried to organize it, I really tried, and for the sake of safety I’ll note the NSFW ones, if you go read, take care of yourself and read at your own caution, because I can read pretty much about anything doesn’t mean anyone can and have too so check the tags every time ! Take care of yourself and enjoy the ones you read ! 💙
Emotional fics
Like ribbons by heroics (Dan/Max, NSFW)
I will always be there for you, brother by someone_worth_racing_for (Nico/Carlos, NSFW)
And in the end I will seek you out amongst the stars by mandzilkos (Charles/Max)
Bitter/Sweet by Tianvette (Seb/Mark)
Night Bus by EverythingIsAJokeIncludingMe (Lando/Carlos)
Black Over Red (the death of a King) by onehonor
not magnificent by secondlifetime
toffee by simplyverstappen (Dan/Max, NSFW)
terrible sting, terrible storm by singlemalter (Lando/Carlos)
I got everything at my fingertips (How can I resist when it feels like this?) by komkommertijd (Dan/Max)
Holding together what can not be held by Quagswagging (NSFW)
The spleen of monte carlo (and how to deal with it) by altissimozucca (Charles/Max)
Interlude/infatuation by toro (sapoeysap) (Alex/George)
I’ve not hate (that’s how I know I lied to you) by GufettoGrigio (Lewis/Nico)
Phantom limb by Charona (Dan/Max, NSFW)
(Dis)closure by Charona (Nico/Kevin, NSFW)
Under Greece’s stars by Lily_Anna (Lewis/Nico)
Hate is a terrible feeling by scarletred
Fluff and/or funny fics
be still my foolish heart by jorgelorenzo (Carlos/Lando, NSFW)
That's What Friends Are For by KyoukayKanata (Carlos/Lando)
Some Boys Just Wanna Watch The World Burn by onehonor (Lando/Charles)
you ('cause you feel like home) by maxverstappens
amor (la leche style) by toro (sapoeysap) (Carlos/Lando)
Nico’s Greatest Achievement by F1_rabbit (Lando/Max)
Mystery Man by simplyverstappen (Lando/Carlos, Dan/Max)
There’s love in this life, there’s no obstacle by Pericardiaca (George/Alex)
Drowned in oxygen by scarletred (Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
We’ll Always Be Okay by Thatsrightmyhype (Max/Lando, NSFW)
Tying Cherry Stems in Knots by WhiteWolfCraft (Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
And they were quarantined by scarletred (Charles/Max)
50 Sentences of Carlos and Lando by palalabru (Lando/Carlos)
The Day Kevin Magnussen Attempted Murder (and Fernando learned not everyone likes to be babied) by Quagswagging
You Say We're Just Friends (But Friends Don't Know the Way You Taste) by WhiteWolfCraft (Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
it's not that hard to open eyes that close when they couldn't have by circuitricardoporno (Lando/Carlos)
An analysis of inappropriate behaviour between teammates, featuring Lando Norris and Carlos Sainz Junior by WhiteWolfCraft (Lando/Carlos)
Darling, we’re a paradox (but I think we’ll manage) by altissimozucca (Pierre/Daniil)
Far away truths by raikkonen (armario) (Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
Thank you, Anytime by sensibleshoes28 (Charles/Max)
Game Stops and Spanish Restaurants by Anna_banana (Lando/Carlos)
Catch you when you fall by maxverstappens (Dan/Max)
soulmates (or: max has a love-hate relationship with coldplay) by altissimozucca (Charles/Max)
your love I’m lost in by maxverstappens (Lando/Max, NSFW)
Last night you were in my room (and now my bedsheets smell like you) by LostInSpace and MerlinSpecter (Dan/Max)
Abu Dhabi 2035 by Charona (Dan/Max)
A Drink Too Many, Or Maybe Less by ColdWhiteLight (Kimi/Seb, NSFW)
Oh, Sandman, bring us a dream by bonotje (Lando/Max)
So happy Christmas (back on the bad list) by toro (sapoeysap) (Alex/George)
You’ll pull at my neck and we’ll break what can’t be broken by grwyish (Charles/Max)
Set alight my skin (and I’ll melt like ice) by Directionless_Foray (Lando/Carlos)
irish spring 5-in-1 by Anonymous (Pierre/Daniil)
Others
Like Magic by Rizz07 (de-ageing fic)
Even though you know we fly (Don't call me angel) by Alexa_Plays (George/Alex)
Have You Come Up A Name For Your Chassis? By Asahi_9L1314
Rule 63 by WhiteWolfCrack (George/Alex, NSFW, genderswap)
I took the stars from our eyes and then I made a map by Directionless_Foray (Lewis/Seb)
kiss me under the light of a thousand stars by altissimozucca
if you wanna come back, it’s alright by raikkonen (armario) (Pierre/Daniil, NSFW)
F1 Rarepair Drabbles by raikkonen (armario) (NSFW)
Fringe contender by redpaint (Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
www.tumblr.com by legolasass
Lady, I need my dog back now…and my Nico too by Anonymous (Lewis/Nico)
A moment you need me to stay by circuitricardoporno (Lando/Carlos/Isa, NSFW)
McLaren Unboxed | The Papaya Boys | #2020 by legolasass (Carlos/Lando)
The Performer by theinanitor (Jenson/Seb)
spotlight on me and i'm ready to break by Pericardiaca (NSFW)
The banterzone by groooovybaby
Lance stroll’s exclusive hallowe’en party by raikkonen (armario)
So, let’s dance (when we’re not supposed to be) by Directionless_Foray (Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
Long fics/series
Three Wishes For Verstappen by PoemAboutCitylights (Dan/Max)
Solar Flare by Tianvette (Jenson/Seb, NSFW)
Baby I'll Rule (Let Me Live That Fantasy) by komkommertijd (Dan/Max)
knife's edge by restless5oul (Charles/Max, NSFW)
In High School by Zig_Zag_F1 (Charles/Max, George/Alex, Carlos/Lando, NSFW)
Everyone’s shagging because I said so by Wellthisdidntgotoplan (serie, NSFW)
The Experiences of Blossoms by magic_one (serie)
New love old love by circuitricardoporno (serie, Alex/George/Lando, Lando/Carlos, NSFW)
Every colour illuminates by circuitricardoporno (serie, Lando/George, NSFW)
Bad baby by Directionless_Foray (serie, Charles/Seb, NSFW)
Max and Pierre by kakkakerssi (Pierre/Max, NSFW)
The five last fics of sirius (Alex/George/Lando, NSFW)
All Behind A Mask by JustAnotherF1Fangirl (Lando/Carlos)
Youtube AU by simplyverstappen (serie, NSFW)
Sons of the gods by EverythingIsAJokeIncludingMe
Falling and finding by Directionless_Foray (serie, Charles/Seb, NSFW)
Can’t go on without you by FadingDragon (Dan/Max)
Magic verse by simplyverstappen (serie, Dan/Max)
The higher we soar the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly by RosaNautica (Romain/Kevin, NSFW)
Ten Important Events In My Life by komkommertijd (serie)
Crowns by simplyverstappen (serie, NSFW)
Sebastian and Kimi raising the chaotic trio (aka a Highschool AU) by greeny1710 (serie, NSFW)
The Grid’s Apocrypha by singlemalter (serie, NSFW)
Quiet healing by Directionless_Foray (serie, Charles/Seb, NSFW)
Max and Lando by kakkakerssi (serie, NSFW)
Our families by greeny1710 (serie, NSFW)
French fics (of course I had to include that category)
Passer le temps by Jae_Universe
Dead Hearts by Laeana (serie)
10 façons de mourir by Laeana (serie)
Love is a seduction game by Laeana (serie)
Pffffiouuuuuu that is DONE ! So long 😂 MP/mom I hope you have enough to read for the next WEEKS !
All the writers mentioned above that have a tumblr are here and they deserve a fucking lot of recognition : @someone-worth-racing-for @onehonoramongstthieves @verstappened @nicorosberg @komkommertijd @bwoahtastic @havertzs @alphatoro @gufettogrigio @kyoukai-kanata @landonenorris @f1rabbit @shellhaeds @scharletred @palalabu @landolait @bottasvaltteri @sleepyverstappens @yxllowish @storm-in-my-teacup @rizz07 @redpaint @nxrrislandx @laeana @lilyanna13 and all the others that I didn’t find their tumblr account 😂
#THIS IS SO LONG AND I SPENT SO MANY HOURS ON IT OMFG#i ALMOST put one of my fics but i was like nah not yet i need to write a better thing#ANYWAY ALL THESE FICS ARE FREAKING AMAZING#some are my go-to when i’m bored#one of them i spent two hours looking for it and i yelled when i found it#i lived an adventure for that post really#also napsi you’ll never get bored with all of this#HAVE FUN READING ALL THAT EVERYONE#fic rec
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1169
Do you take lessons for anything?
No. I’ve done so in the past, but not at the moment.
Has something really heavy ever fallen on you?
Other than siblings or cousins from when we played together as kids, I don’t think so.
If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear?
I never wear makeup but whenever my friends have used my face as a practice stage (lol) they’ve usually just used natural or nude-ish colors, which I find look okay on me.
Does your shower have curtains or a glass door/wall?
It has a sliding door. I’m not sure what material it’s made out of, but I can tell you it’s at least not glass.
If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other?
Cooper does tend to bark and/or whine when he sees me giving more attention to Kimi, but not always. Kimi couldn’t give less of a crap, but this is also because he is 13.
Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in?
I used to not like being inside my bedroom, especially after the breakup. For a long time it was a place I only associated with crying and breakdowns, so when I was doing the arduous task of starting over I haaaaated staying there because it only hurled me right back to square one. But I’m happy to say that I eventually got better, had enough strength to change the narrative for my room, and now I like being here again :)
Do you remember the last question you were asked? What did you answer?
My mom just asked me to watch Cooper because he was having the zoomies.
Besides salt and butter, do you put anything on your popcorn?
Not a big fan of popcorn but if I had to pick a topping, I’d go with cheddar cheese.
Are you lonely?
I’ll feel it sometimes, but it only lasts for a moment or so.
What’s your favorite magazine to read?
Wow I haven’t read a magazine in years.
Do you like pineapple?
I hate it. In all forms. The pizza debate doesn’t even matter to me lmao, I just think pineapple downright sucks.
Have you ever seen fireflies?
They used to be common in our village when we first moved in, back when there were only like 3 houses in the neighborhood (we were one of the first to move in here). As more houses were built and the place got more occupied the fireflies gradually lessened until they disappeared altogether.
Have you ever trespassed?
I very vividly remember taking multiple trips to the school cemetery back in grade school (I went to Catholic school and ours had a cemetery below our chapel, where all our deceased nuns were housed...I really shouldn’t be talking about this at 10 PM...). I am 100% sure that was an off-limits area but we went there anyway because we were a naughty group of kids and because no one was guarding the area.
Do you tell your parents where you are going?
Yeah; if I live with them, they have the right to know. < Ooh, I’ve never even thought about it this way before but this is a very good point. I’ll second this, haha.
Do you agree with the notion that all people were created equal?
Yes.
Do you raise your hand or participate in class?
God never. I hid as much as I can and only recited if I was called on purpose.
Do you like visiting the mall? Why or why not?
I like the malls that we have. But then again, malls are the only decent public spaces we have - we don’t have public libraries, parks, playgrounds, etc. – so it’s not like I have a choice on where I can go if I want to go out.
Have you ever purposely hurt an animal?
Yeah I kill bugs when I see them. Soz, I have no feelings for them whatsoever.
Would you ever see a therapist?
I planned to finally do this last year but it just fell through haha and eventually I was able to care for myself too. Now that I’m doing a lot better for the most part, I feel like I’d have no clue what to talk about once faced with one.
Are you afraid of heights?
Only if I had to jump all the way down. But if I ever found myself staying at an extreme height simply to enjoy the view, or if I was ever in one of those towers where the top floor’s floor is made out of glass, I think I would enjoy that.
Are you afraid of the dark?
I always say I’m usually not afraid of the dark, and will only be if I was in a situation that was intended to scare me. I would definitely be afraid of the dark if I was in like an abandoned cave or a haunted house, but I would also find the darkness in my room comforting.
Are you a jealous person?
When I am it’s mostly been in a playful sense and rarely serious.
When is your birthday?
April 21st.
What are you listening to right now?
My very very old aircon doing its very very loud whirring thing. It’s become a running joke in the family because it is literally SO FUCKING LOUD hahahaha
Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing?
As a goody-goody, I can only ever do this to my mom; but yeah, she’s caught me many times.
Are you still friends with someone from kindergarten?
Sure, but I’m not ~close friends with any of them. Just chummy enough to like their photos on social media once in a while or greet them happy birthday. My oldest friend was from Grade 1.
What is the most important thing to you?
Being happy with myself and making sure I don’t miss out on life and opportunities.
Do you like whipped cream?
I can take it or leave it.
Are you close to your mother?
We get along but not close.
Are you close to your father?
I’m closer to him in the sense that I would be more comfortable around him, but we’re also not physically or emotionally close.
Do you walk around bare foot when you're at home? Or do you wear socks?
I am Asian hahaha what do you think?
Do you like chocolate popsicles?
Sure! One would sound lovely right now, actually.
Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume?
Both of the schools I’ve attended don’t have mascots.
Would you rather see the Great Wall of China or Big Ben?
Great Wall for sure. Sorry but I can’t see myself getting excited over a giant clock, and I’m sure there are other lovely spots in London I’d much rather visit.
Have you ever written a poem?
Always unsuccessfully. It’s never been my forte.
Would you ever be a tornado chaser?
That’s a thing? Uh...no way??
What is your favorite thing to eat with bbq sauce, if you even like that stuff?
Pizza. And anything, I guess. Barbecue sauce is the bomb.
Your parents tell you that this summer, you get to pick the vacation. Where do you plan to go?
Covid notwithstanding and budget permitting, probably New York City.
What do you think is a good theme for a prom?
I could not care less.
Have you ever had to do a class in summer school?
Thankfully, never.
Do you get nervous when you go to the doctor? About what?
You know, I’ve always thought going to the doctor was no sweat until I realized just how nervous I was when I had to book a telemedicine consultation once as part of my job (PR can make you do the most random, out of context things sometimes, I swear haha). I surprised even myself with the reaction I had when I found out I had to do it, and how I felt like declining the offer...I guess I was scared about the possibility of underlying health issues suddenly being unearthed. Your whole life can always get turned upside down in the blink of an eye with just one diagnosis.
Have you ever been to the rainforest?
I’m pretty sure the climate I live in is called tropical rainforest, so I guess yeah.
Have you ever created a website?
Not from scratch. I had always made it under an umbrella website, like Blogspot.
Ever thought about writing a book?
Sure, as a kid.
Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone?
No. Whenever I have dreams of that nature it’s always me or a loved one being killed, but never me doing the killing.
Do you ever make up stories in your head and wish they come true?
Yes.
Which is worse: stuffy nose or runny nose?
Stuffy. It sucks not being able to breathe freely.
Which is worse: Sick to your stomach or sore throat?
I super hate sore throat. I already get stomachaches frequently, so even though I know how sucky it can be I feel like the discomfort would be bigger with a sore throat.
Do you think your last relationship was a disaster?
The way it ended was, but it wouldn’t be fair to myself to invalidate the genuine happiness I felt when I was in it.
Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube?
Never.
Who do you think is the easiest to talk to?
Angela.
Would you consider yourself to be emo?
No.
Do you have a favourite metal band or do you not like metal?
Not really, no.
What is your current desktop picture?
It’s just one of the provided desktop photos on my Mac.
Thick or thin blanket?
Thick.
Who are your favorite bands?
Paramore, Coldplay, and Against Me!
How do you mark through your word search puzzles?
Depends on my mood. Sometimes I’ll strike through and sometimes I’ll go ahead and encircle the entire word altogether.
Have you ever sewn something?
I’ve done embroidery...does that count?
What did you eat for dinner last night?
We had breakfast for dinner, actually hahaha so my dad made an omelette, hotdogs, and tapa.
Ever been grounded? If so, for what?
Continued from last night. Yes, I was caught cursing all over Twitter when I was like 11 so my parents cut off my access to all my gadgets for a year or so. Which, in retrospect, is an acceptable consequence for my actions, but we’re also talking about a time when schools were starting to view the internet as a necessity in doing homework and research. I missed out on nearly all my homework for a while, and my mom didn’t buy it when I kept telling her I needed to do my research over the internet. At the same time, she kept demanding why my grades weren’t doing so well when she was the reason they kept being pulled down...so yep, not a very fun time.
Have you seen all of the Jaws movies?
No and I don’t really have the desire to. Doesn’t seem like my kind of movie.
When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer)
Maybe 2 or 3 years ago.
Have you ever drank Cherry Coke?
No, I don’t drink any soda.
Have you ever had a black eye?
Nope.
Have you ever eaten a bug?
Not to my recollection, but I would love to try cooked crickets and whatever bug can be prepared and eaten.
Do you like pranking people?
Never; the idea makes me cringe since I never know when it’s considered going too far. I’d rather watch people prank other people.
Did you ever take a cooking class in school?
Yeah, but we were required to take it. We also had some baking sessions, which to me was a lot more fun. I remember having to make macarons and rainbow cake which are both right up my alley, heehee.
Do you celebrate St. Patrick’s Day?
No, idk what that is. I just know people turn everything green on that day lol.
Do you use Skype?
I’ve never used Skype on my own. That’s where I used to talk to my dad for video calls maybe around a decade ago, whenever he was abroad; but I never had my own account. These days I alternate among Microsoft Teams, Google Meet, or Zoom.
Have you ever participated in local magazine cover girl searches?
I don’t think so, but I did join a few contests on some of those kid’s magazines we used to have...none of which I won.
Have you ever been called a skank/slut because of the way you dress?
No.
Is your ex sexually attractive to you still?
I haven’t seen her in 5 months, which helps...that said, I simply feel nothing. I’m neither sexually attracted nor not sexually attracted to her.
Describe the most romantic moment you’ve ever had.
I can think of one but I don’t see the point in still raising it, considering where I am in life right now.
Have you ever cheated on a test?
Yes, once. I hated it.
Have you ever been to couple’s counseling?
Nope.
How often does your employer ask you to work overtime?
A few times a week. Sometimes I’ll do it willingly as well just to get the task over with or to save myself some deliverables the next morning. I’m fine with OT-ing tbh; since I work from home, I feel like my time is a lot more flexible.
Did you often read for fun when you were a kid?
I read A LOOOOOT as a kid. I was a total bookworm. < Yeah, same. You could always find me bringing a book to school and reading during breaks, even though they technically didn’t allow us to bring any non-academic book. My spark for reading died when I was around 12, same time as when my depression started to kick in, and it never really came back.
When was the last time you were scared?
Someone from the media called me up yesterday VIA LANDLINE to ask a question about a press release I had sent out that day. I usually read up on the materials we have, but I honestly didn’t give a shit about that particular story and didn’t really make an effort to know more about it, so I found myself stumped when he dropped the question. I ended up stalling for a bit before I was able to stutter an answer, so that was scary, but at least he was nice. Also, I hate phone calls.
What’s your favorite song by Rihanna?
KISS IT KISS IT BETTER
Can you speak binary?
No, I never understood it.
Would you rather live somewhere that had hurricanes or tornadoes?
I already do, at least for hurricanes. I imagine I’d be terrified of tornadoes.
Have you ever had a pet that you disliked?
Nooooooo, never. I was never close to Arlee but I still did my best for her to like me, and always fed her whenever my sister would be in her dorm.
When was the last time you saw hail?
Never. Doesn’t happen all that often here, and when it does it’s always in the provinces.
What is on your mind right this second:
I want to spend my remaining time awake reading fanfic (I’m into them again, omg) but I also wanna finish surveys...so I’m doing my best to breeze through this so I can finally look for something to read hahahahaha.
Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)?
Cooper is Cooperino to me. Sometimes I’ll call him Cooperino Cappuccino. Kimi is Kimchi, Kimmerl, Kimberly, The Kimster, and sometimes Lolo, which is grandpa in Filipino heheh.
When was the last time you shaved your legs?
Like 3 or 4 days ago.
Do you ever try free samples at the store?
Nope.
Do you like boys with long hair?
Physical traits don’t matter much to me.
Do you like rootbeer?
I’ve never tried it but I don’t really want to either haha. It smells weird.
What is the best fast food place, in your opinion?
KFC or Taco Bell. Or Jollibee.
Do you have faith in yourself?
Starting to.
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FRUITS BASKET S2 EPISODE 7 RECAP AKA ‘TOP TIER FURUBA SHIT’
An accurate representation of me getting ready to talk about this episode.
My guys... this episode pretty much hit all the points for me in what I expect of a Fruits Basket episode... and more! I loveeee this episode. I gotta admit last week’s episode was a bit of a shoulder shrug for me cos it was mostly a set up for the beach ‘arc’ but this. episode. I have way too many screen caps, I don’t know how I’ll do this.
And we open up with a big ‘fuck no’. I love the flash forward just to prepare the audience for a whole lot of hurt. Excellent. *pours myself a glass of wine*
- Hiro: “Yeah, yeah, yeah, Mum, just don’t trip over, ok?” Sorry about that guys, I just found out my Mum’s pregnant
Everyone: Whaaaaa?!
Hiro’s nonchalance of it all had me dying 😂
I appreciate the ‘dog’ fan. Definitely accurate in more ways than one. Strike one.
Strike TWO. The fact he said that in front of not only Tohru but KISA AND HIRO is so gross. I’m not even joking. It’s just gross. Not a great joke at all. Poo poo.
STRIKE THREE. Akito... please come get your dog. It’s the only useful thing you can do rn anyway
Wow, Yuki. I actually teared up a little at his realisation. This whole episode should just be called ‘call 999 for these kids’.
Hiro’s mum just sounds like a Furuba fan tbh 😝😂 Also... are the zodiac members born in their animal forms? Or is it just in the first instance they are held by a parent of the opposite sex? Cos if it’s the first option, that’s pretty... messed up. But, theoretically hilarious at the same time!
Ohhhh... Tohru’s one of those people who like to push aside their own problems and focus on other people’s instead... Except, it’s not in an annoying and judge-y way at all. However, I am beginning to question whether she is actually that selfless and the real root of it is that Tohru needs a distraction from her own pain. Either way, it’s sad and I don’t think she’s doing it consciously at all which makes it even sadder.
Oh, Tohru.
Also, appreciation for Momiji being a human backpack at all times. And I love his cat eared hat! I want one! Our Outfit Appreciation Winner this week. 4 stars.
- Kisa/Hiro being a mini version of Kyoru was basically confirmed this episode and I am happy.
Such a gorgeous moment. Pretty much met the feelings and emotions I got from reading this moment in the manga AND MORE. It’s golden. And I love it. ...‘nuff said.
Oh look, Dad’s here too 🤣
*looks into the distance to a far off future...* ANYWAYS
- Kyo being so open and honest and vulnerable with Tohru to a point where he mistakenly already thinks he told Tohru all about his parents already is just... everything to me. Especially from someone like Kyo who’s constantly carrying all this baggage around. But jeez, we always forget that Tohru’s got baggage she’s carrying around too! Tohru and Kyo on surface level look like such opposites in every way but remove some layers and they are so similar, it’s uncanny! 😍🤡
I just love developing relationships. 🥰
- Kyoko definitely wanted to destroy that flowerpot 😈 We love her. We miss her.
He’s so in love with her, I can’t. I’m gonna cry. <3 Also, that expression feels like a very Kazuma expression, is it just me?
*spontaneously combusts*
But anyway... just cos we can’t have anything good for too long...
Tbh if I knew a Shigure, that’d be how I’d start every conversation.
I love Hatori. :) I mean he wouldn’t actually slice his gut open but it still means a lot to me that he said he would...
This go around of Fruits Basket has made me realise how much I relate to him and his position in the family. Every anime has a character that’s in their twenties and just... tired and I always relate best to them, shoutout to Keishin Ukai from Haikyuu.
Even though I hate Akito, I have an appreciation for the subtle shit the animators/designers do whenever they come onto screen. All of Akito’s actions have a kinda feather-lightness/almost ethereal feel to them and the way Akito is contrasted against not only the scenery but the other characters around them is... so gooood. I’ve already talked about how I love the emphasis on the presence of Akito in their first appearance in the anime but... I’ll still be talking about it cos it’s great. And I can’t wait to hear Colleen Clinkenbeard in this ep, but Maaya Sakamoto was stellar in this episode (fun fact: did you know she also played Haruhi in OHSHC?!?).
But yeah, I still hate Akito. Sorry.
- Kisa’s little sigh of relief that Tohru doesn’t have to meet Akito was already HEARTBREAKING but mixed with this moment....?!?!
...
I...
I just really need someone to explain to me how you could like Akito. Even after the ending of this whole series. Like...
I just don’t get it. I don’t...
Look, I’m gonna malfunction if I don’t move on.
Oh?
This is the start... of something new... it feels so right... to be here with you...
oooohhhh 🎶
👀
- Kinda sad that Kyo and Tohru had the house to themselves but there was so much weird and bad energy in the air that they couldn’t even really enjoy their pancakes :(
- That Akito and Shigure and Hatori (and partially Kureno) scene just really... disgusted me. To see someone have that much power in their touch and their words is... freaky and unsettling. And I love it cos it’s interesting but I also hate it soooo much. I have nothing more to say about it besides that really. I was more interested in the Shigure and Hatori moment afterwards...
That’s a nice way of putting it...
Maybe this was to be taken mostly as a joke, but do you think that Shigure actually wants Hatori to remind him how much of a shitbag he’s being? Most of my problem with Shigure (and why I actually liked 2001!Shigure but let’s not go there again) is that out of everyone in this series, he’s the most untouched. And yet he schemes and manipulates and seems to get everything he wants. AND what makes it even worse and annoying and spectacular, is that Shigure’s little nudges and pushes of the chess pieces which are the zodiac members aren’t so obvious to the extent that you could only blame him for it. It’s almost genius, if it weren’t so repulsive.
*sighs* I just really want him to either repent or feel some kind of guilt afterwards.
...Hence why I’m most interested in where he’s at after the end of this all.
All I want is a scene between him and Tohru, somewhat like this:
👀
...Ok, this moment made me like Shigure just by 5% more this episode. Still trying to figure out that Shigure/Akito relationship literally a decade later tho...
BACK TO SOME KINDA HAPPY(?) STUFF!
I love love love love love this moment between Yuki and Tohru. It was gorgeous!
I wish this scene were longer so I could make an AMV (if I really felt like it) with Coldplay’s ‘A Sky Full Of Stars’. The lyrics match the moment so much and I definitely cried.
Oh, Yuki...
It was such a beautiful way to end this episode. Wow.
And Yuki’s words to Tohru that ‘she’s just like the sky’ has so many meanings to it and I want to go into it but I’ll start really explicitly going into spoilers. So, I’ll just leave it as poetic cinema.
Perfect.
God, this was such a good episode, guys! I’d probably put this episode on the same level as the True Form episode. It gave us furuba shenanigans, it gave us kyoru, it gave us disgust and hurt and it gave us a moment of someone rising out of the ashes!
I love this anime. :) See you next week!
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lastly maybe something based of sparks by coldplay for bobby?
A/N: here’s a little bit of I guess a hurt/comfort drabble but the hurt is not shown, just mentioned lmao ik it’s not really based on the song per se but it is worked into it so I hope you still like it 🥺
You hadn’t spoken for 3 days at this point, and the guilt and anxiety was gnawing away at your nerves. What if you’d truly scared him off for good this time? What if you’d really fucked up and upset him, past the point of being fixed by an apology. You couldn’t believe you’d fallen out over something so stupid but that’s what unrequited love does to you, you supposed. You were still coming to terms with your feelings for Rob and figuring out the best way to tell him, which unfortunately left you snapping at him when he asked if you were okay and he said some hurtful things in retaliation, which clearly he felt bad about afterwards.
A knock on the door startled you out of your thoughts and you almost sloshed your coffee all over your lap as you rushed to answer it. You took a moment to compose yourself, seeing the obscured figure through the frosted glass and trying to figure out who it could be at 7 in the morning. Tall, looked they were holding a guitar, shifting nervously from foot to foot- wait, a guitar?
You yanked open the door then, and sure enough there was Bobby breathing a sigh of relief and letting his smoke go. “Thank god,” he said, a hint of a smile on his face “for a second there I was scared you weren’t gonna answer.”
“Why? You know me, I’m ranked number one in the world for fastest door opener.” You joked, thinking back to a conversation you’d had where he called you that. But the joke fell flat and didn’t do much to ease either of your nerves.
“Well I kinda thought I was the last person you wanted to see today.”
“And I thought you hated my guts.”
And that seemed to hit a nerve. He frowned in confusion before taking another drag of his cigarette.
“What? I- no, no, I don’t, why would I- look can we just talk? Well actually I wanted to play you a song I learnt yesterday. If you’ll let me. Or you can slam the door in my face and tell me to go away forever, I’ll understand.” Rob was stumbling over his words, blue eyes constantly flicking between yours and the floor. You smiled then.
“Go on then, I’d love to hear it.”
He promptly discarded his cigarette then and sat himself on the front step of your porch, patting the concrete for you to join him as he began to strum the opening chords. You thought you could vaguely make out the song, something by Coldplay, but you couldn’t say which one.
“You can sing along you know.” He smirked, not looking up from where his fingers met the frets.
“I don’t know the words Bobby!” You giggled, giving him a little nudge with your elbow but not enough so it would muck up his playing. He just shook his head and took a deep breath.
“Did I drive you away? I know what you’ll say. You say oh, sing one we know.”
And it was then you realised that this was his apology. This was his love confession.
“But I promise you this, I’ll always look out for you. Yeah that’s what I’ll do.”
The lyrics matched you both so well that you imagined him tediously skipping through spotify the night before, trying to find the perfect song to make it up to you. Not to mention how he must’ve spent hours just learning it non stop and it was all for you. Because he cares about you. You turned bright red as you reflected on how stupid you were to think for so long that he couldn’t love you the way you wanted him to, but here was the man of your dreams on your doorstep serenading you. Well, if that’s not how you want to be loved then you have to be crazy.
“I said ohhhhhh, I cry ohhhhhh...
yeah I saw sparks”
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Stuck in reverse - playlist
You can find it on Spotify here.
Okay, let’s talk about it!
Sam Smith – Fix you
I remember crying to the original song (by Coldplay) back in 2005. Whoo boy, lots of teenage feelings!
I’m not the biggest fan of Sam Smith’s music, but one day I was just driving home from work and this song began playing on the radio and by the end of it I could barely see the road.
// When you try your best, but you don’t succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can’t replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse? //
That one line – stuck in reverse – felt just so perfect for a story set in the universe where people invert themselves back and forth.
It became one of the three main songs that inspired me to write the whole damn thing, and also the only title in the story that is not a title of a song as well.
Chapter 1: Ben Platt – Ease my mind
This is one of the songs I have on my daily playlist, I just love it, and the lyrics are so fitting:
//Most days I wake up with a pit in my chest
There are thoughts that I can’t put to rest
There’s a worry that I can’t place
Most nights, I am restless and quiet won’t come
So I lay there and wait for the sun
There’s a trouble that won’t show its face
You came out of nowhere and you cut through all the noise
I make sense to the madness when I listen to your voice//
We learn more about the nightmares in the next chapters, but it all starts here. That melancholic vibe stuck with me for the rest of the story I guess.
Bonus song: Lewis Capaldi - Before you go
The combat scene in one song, or at least what I imagined was going through Reader’s mind at that point.
//I fell by the wayside like everyone else
I hate you, I hate you, I hate you but I was just kidding myself
Our every moment, I start to replace
‘Cause now that they’re gone, all I hear are the words that I needed to say
When you hurt under the surface
Like troubled water running cold
Well, time can heal but this won’t//
Have you ever felt that way? Trying to hide your broken heart under anger? I don’t know, it just resonated deeply.
The second part of the song kinda seeped into the next chapter:
//Was there something I could’ve said
To make your heart beat better?
If only I’d have known you had a storm to weather
//Would we be better off by now
If I’d have let my walls come down?
Maybe, I guess we’ll never know//
Chapter 2: Kaleo - I can’t go on without you
Another song from my daily playlists (side note – I saw Kaleo once live on a music festival and they were mind-blowing, you should really check out more of their work).
It worked with the story because of its desperate and painful mood.
Bonus: Calum Scott - Dancing on my own
Holy shit, I FELT this one. (Been there, done that). Of course I had to write it into Reader’s past. Actually, I wrote it first and then found the song, but it doesn’t matter, that’s the flashback scene right here:
//Somebody said you got a new friend
Does she love you better than I can?
And there’s a big black sky over my town
I know where you’re at, I bet she’s around
And yeah, I know it’s stupid
But I just gotta see it for myself
I’m in the corner, watching you kiss her,
I’m right over here, why can’t you see me?
And I’m giving it my all //
Chapter 3: Billie Eilish – Bad guy
No feels, pure bop. This song is so BADASS, I really needed to get that vibe into the undercover mission, I didn’t want Reader to be an emotional mess and nothing else, you know?
Bonus: Tones and I – Dance Monkey
I shit you not, I’ve had that one on repeat for the dance scene. There is something incredibly seductive in that beat, I just couldn’t get it out of my head.
Bonus: Kings of Leon – Closer
It just makes my heart clench and leaves me breathless.
Chapter 4: Ben Platt – Bad habit
Ah, that was the moment when I cursed at myself for using Ease my mind for chapter 1, but we already talked about it.
Even though this song is very emotional, it’s not that heartbreaking, you can hear a faint smile here and there and it just makes my heart sing.
And oh my god, those lyrics:
//You always said that I’d come back to you again
‘Cause everybody needs a friend, it’s true
Someone to quiet the voices in my head
Make ‘em sing to me instead, it’s you
Hate to say that I love you
Hate to say that I need you
Hate to say that I want you
But I do
Bad habit, I know
But I’m needin’ you right now
Can you help me out?
Can I lean on you?
Been one of those days
Sun don’t wanna come out
Can you help me out?
Can I lean on you?//
They just work with that plot, you know?
Bonus: Dodie – Sick of losing soulmates
Another song that just resonates with the story.
//What a strange being you are, God knows where I would be
If you hadn’t found me, sitting all alone in the dark
A dumb screenshot of youth
Watch how a cold broken teen
Will desperately lean on a superglued human of proof
What the hell would I be, without you (what the hell would I be)
Brave face talk so lightly, hide the truth (hide the truth)
'Cause I’m sick of losing soulmates, so where do we begin
I can finally see, you’re as fucked up as me
So how do we win?//
Chapter 5: Adele – Someone like you
The whole damn sunset scene + this song on repeat = feels
The pain in her voice? God, it just reduces me to a puddle of tears.
Reader could just sing it at some point to Neil almost word for word.
Bonus: Passenger – Let her go
Okay, the case of that one is quite funny, because I kinda needed to figure out how to get from point A to point B of the chapter, and I was browsing Spotify looking for „campfire songs” or something like that. Of course I’ve heard this one before, but I’ve never actually focused on the lyrics.
And oh boy, suddenly it all became clear.
Headcanon time – in my head, Wheeler and Neil are close friends, she treats him a bit like a younger brother, I just can imagine they know each other very well at that point. Of course she knows hows about his past. Of course she heard about Reader. And she thinks they are both silly babies and they should just kiss, right? That’s why she chooses that song.
Those lyrics – they fit Neil’s backstory so damn well.
//Only know you love her when you let her go
And you let her go//
And he was stupid enough to let her go. Because his timing was off.
Those lyrics are also perfect to make Reader think about his ex-girlfriend, because of course that is what you’re gonna it’s all about.
Bonus: Del Amitri – Tell her this
Ahh, there it is – the second out of three main songs for Stuck in Reverse.
I remember the moment I found out that Rob Pattinson sings and writes music, then I listened to some of the songs and my heart went whoooosh. So I just had to make Neil play a guitar, I just needed to find out what song would be The One.
Do you remember that flashback about them both watching a tv show on his couch? Here, you’re welcome.
I recently started rewatching Scrubs and when I got to that episode – ding, ding, ding!
This is the ultimate “hey, I fucked up, I shouldn’t have let you go, I’m an idiot and I love you.”
Chapter 6: Imagine Dragons – Next to me
I adore that song. It warms my heart. I think it fits Neil and Reader’s relationship.
And I needed all the fluffy feelings to switch the tone of the story to something lighter.
Bonus: Michelle Branch – Everywhere
This one is a silly bop, and it always puts me in a good mood. A nice song to listen to when you are happy, in love, and you are making breakfast.
Bonus: Ashlee Simpson – Pieces of me
This one (same as the one before) came to me from Zach Braff’s workout playlist, haha. I mean I almost forgot about it, but it makes me smile every time I hear it, and the lyrics work nicely:
//On a Monday I am waiting
Tuesday I am fading
And By Wednesday I can’t sleep
Then the phone rings I hear you
And the darkness is a clear view
Cause you’ve come to rescue me
Fall, with you I fall so fast
I can hardly catch my breath
I hope it lasts
It seems like I can finally
Rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
It’s as if you know me better
Than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me//
Bonus: Kaleo – I want more
Is there such a thing as a warm melancholy? Because that is a vibe I get from that song.
//Turn back, leave all you had
Forgive, I’ll forget
'Cause what we need is what we once had
Time won’t stand still
Just say you will
'Cause I need you there and now
If you leap, I’ll come falling too
Running deep 'til that rivers through
I don’t mind what you have to do
'Cause I won’t think less, less of you
Yes, I want more, more
Looking for more
I want more, more
'Cause I want more
Old grounds
Feels like the weight has been lifted away
So don’t you leave me there wanting more//
Chapter 7: Ben Platt – In case you don’t live forever
I mean it’s not my fault that Ben’s songs make me FEEL things, damn it.
The whole damn song = utter heartbreak when you think about Neil coming back to Reader before he goes back to Stalsk-12 to open that damn lock.
//I, I’ve carried this song in my mind
Listen, it’s echoing in me
But I haven’t helped you to hear it
We, we’ve only got so much time
I’m pretty sure it would kill me
If you didn’t know the pieces of me are pieces of you
I’ve waited way too long to say
Everything you mean to me
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you now
I love you more than you’ll ever wrap your head around
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you the truth
I’m everything that I am because of you//
Bonus: Charlene Soraia – Wherever you will go
Why am I doing this to you? Because we all like pain.
This one is for the scene on the deck:
//So lately, been wondering
Who will be there to take my place
When I’m gone you’ll need love to light the shadows on your face
If a great wave shall fall and fall upon us all
Then between the sand and stone, could you make it on your own
If I could, then I would
I’ll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low, I’ll go wherever you will go
And maybe, I’ll find out
A way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you through the darkest of your days
If a great wave shall fall and fall upon us all
Then I hope there’s someone out there who can bring me back to you//
Bonus: Rhys Lewis – No right to love you
No light, only pain and suffering.
//'Cause I have no right to love you
When I chose to walk away
I have no right to miss you
When I didn’t wanna stay
And I have no right to need you
And I knew what my heart was gonna lose
I have no right to love you
But I do, I still do
Yeah, I still do//
Bonus: Knox Brown x Gallant – Reignite
This song is just so incredible, it makes my palms sweat and my mind going places. Yep, it was on repeat.
Oh you know which scene this one is for.
Bonus: Freya Ridings – Lost without you
The last dialogue. On repeat. Because this song breaks my heart and leaves me a sobbing mess.
//Strangers rushin’ past
Just tryna get home
But you were the only
Safehaven that I’ve known
Hits me at full speed
Feel like I can’t breathe
And nobody knows
This pain inside me
My world is crumbling
I should never
Let you go
I think I’m lost without you//
(OI, SPOILERS)
Chapter 8: Florence + The Machine – Never let me go
I have only one thing to say:
Fuck you, Nolan.
Third out of three.
//And it’s over and I’m going under
But I’m not giving up
I’m just giving in
Oh, slipping underneath
So cold and so sweet
In the arms of the ocean, so sweet and so cold
And all this devotion, well, I never knew at all
And the questions I have for a sinner released
In the arms of the ocean deliver me
(Never let me go, never let me go
Never let me go, never let me go)//
Bonus: Sasha Sloan - Dancing with your ghost
Suffer with me.
//Yelling at the sky
Screaming at the world
Baby, why’d you go away?
I’m still your girl
Holding on too tight
Head up in the clouds
Heaven only knows
Where you are now
How do I love
How do I love again?
How do I trust
How do I trust again?
I stay up all night
Tell myself I’m alright
Baby, you’re just harder to see than most
I put the record on
Wait 'til I hear our song
Every night I’m dancing with your ghost
Every night I’m dancing with your ghost//
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