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nimue-hidden-lake · 5 days

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The MASSIVE Izuann Ramble

More like an analysis but details....

This is an essay about the two I once wrote in a server. I adjusted it a little to make it more suitable to be a a massive essay. This is a long one so sit back and read at your own leisure. I will also reference my own longfic a lot so if curious or wanting more context, I recommend reading it.

I will start by laying down the tropes Izuann follows + a bit of writing development (as in how I changed it before the longfic):

This is just an intro. Here are the relationship charts I made. Apologies for the outdated songs. If it isn't JPop I only know like 5 songs.

Tropes used:

Enemies To Lovers

Childhood Friends (but they have no idea until like later into the story)

So uh can you say it is also Friends To Lovers? Probably... Maybe... I let you be the judge of that.

So the childhood friends thing was only added after I decided to go beyond a Love/Hate dynamic and actually allow this relationship to develop. Originally I intended for those to go the 'I hate you but I also love you' route but you can imagine how terrible of an idea that is. Sure, it is fun writing them argue but that can't be where this stands. Or else one would ask "Why the hell are you two dating!?" I needed more. So I thought of a few more plot points to work on and based the first longfic around those points. This allowed the two to develop and actually get to a healthy relationship.

I debated what approach to take so I think I will just go with a chronological approach here. Meaning we are first going to childhood, some noteworthy stuff to know in between and then jump 10+ years into the future and get to the main story and thus how this dynamic even develops. Thus I will jump in between my own chapters. I am referencing this longfic here. It is fully written by me if you’re wondering.

Well, kind of. I must first introduce some basics for Nyeli aka Patch. Because he plays an important role throughout this, even in the context of the relationship. As for how a chibi cat-human hybrid exists... For now, don't worry about that. Just accept that he does.

So Nyeli's original name is Patch. Patch has been a name given by Izumi when he was a kid. He found Patch one day inside a cardboard box and took him home, thinking his Mom would not mind. Spoiler, she does. So much so that she made sure to put Patch back out as a stray during a trip overseas and lying to her son about his friend running away which leads to a misunderstanding between Patch and Izumi later down the line. Ann is the one finding Patch and taking him instead, naming him 'Nyeli' which is the new name he goes by.

One could say the name 'Patch' is symbolic- Him helping fix not just his own relationship with Izumi but also his with Ann. Because there is a massive one between the two. Though one could argue that it is subconscious. As for why the name Patch...

That was how he and Patch had met. The name choice was odd for a Japanese kid yet Izumi didn’t know what else to name him. It was a word he had heard in a kid’s show he had been watching at the time and he just loved the sound of it. It was a character’s name most likely and he loved it. Nothing classic Japanese, a unique name for his new friend. He didn’t know what it meant at the time and honestly, the kid had not even cared. Kids do not sweat details after all.

Ok now really with everything out of the way I am getting into the actual relationship... Yeah, long intro here as well but as an overview.

The two technically first meet when they are kids. Izumi's parents both had jobs overseas and took their kid with them of course. They allowed him to roam free for a while yet one could imagine that he has had a hard time due to the language barrier. In fact, he didn't even understand Ann when first meeting them.

That was in a literal sense of course. He had never any idea what she was telling him, not daring to speak after having introduced himself and her being unable to pronounce it. This resulted in her calling him ‘Izuzu’, having given up midway through to pronounce his name. And it became somewhat terrifying to speak when she started talking in this alien language. He didn’t understand her, at all, and didn’t dare to ask. Could he even? Would she understand him? It was like communicating with an alien, another species altogether.

[...]

As for how he met her… He didn’t know. She just walked up to him, greeted him and started to drag him into one game after the other without consent whatsoever. She just took him away and started introducing him to games, or so he assumed. At first he was debating if he should participate yet this girl made sure he stayed one way or another. And to make matters more complicated Patch wanted to stay as well, having fun with whatever the girl came up with.

Little Izumi tried to explain the consequences, what Mama might say if something happened to either of them yet the kitty had been too occupied with the game, being unable to reason with. So, it was two against one in the end and as a kid he let himself drag into whatever game the little girl came up with.

Simply put, it was a relationship what one would expect between kids - Just playing games and having fun. Well, even if it took a while for Izumi.

The three would play games together, whatever Ann came up with, even if it was dangerous. There the two would showcase their contrasts to another - Izumi was a hesitant kid due to not knowing what his mother will say (she will play a role here, I think you can already tell in what way).

‘Look at your hands! What if you infected yourself with some incurable disease!? Do you want to die!? That’s it! Up to your room! You will stay there! I will hire someone to look after you too!’

It would be something she would say and he hated to make Mama worry. She was just looking out, nothing more. So there was no need to make her worry whatsoever.

Ann was a carefree kid from the get go, not even caring if they scraped their knee or something. Heck, Ann may recall Izumi being a bit of a crybaby due to seeing him panic so often.

He had watched her eagerly up until when she suddenly tripped, face plastered onto the hard ground. Out of worry he got up, running over to her and shaking her for some time. At first the girl didn’t want to get up it seems, him almost tearing up as a result. Did she— She didn’t, right? No way! She can’t! She shouldn’t—

But he would hold those tears in when suddenly seeing her head lift up, a bump right in front of it. But instead of crying like he would have she was only laughing it off while rubbing it.

(from the oneshot Play Date, not in the main story)

One is overly careful, one might argue trapped, and the other is going through life without a care in the world. It is one reason why the two could not even recognize another, given that they had done 180s essentially. At least at first glance. But both got along just fine despite being unable to literally understand another. This continued until...

Those were the days Izumi looked back on, more fondly than he liked to admit. The time was short lived as one of his parents had spotted the two, seeing what ‘barbaric game’ he was playing with this girl before being dragged away. It was the last time he ever saw her, unable to tell her what happened. Not like he could talk to her or anything but at least try to say goodbye. Because the rest of the time he had been stuck at home, supervised by one of his parents with a fair scolding. He made them worry and while he believed to understand that they cared it always left a sour taste in his mouth.

Long story short Izumom saw the two, didn't like it and thus removed her son from there. All while also making sure to get rid of Patch as well while at it, having both out of the picture. I went with a headcanon that his parents are overly controlling and would keep their son almost on a leash as well as making decisions for him instead of asking him (it is at least hinted at in PORTRAIT, at least from the bits I read... Take it with a grain of salt as I have not read a fan translation yet). For now we focus on the Mom but know that the father is not innocent either. I had to explain how Izumi is described as 'kind' but then does shit like kidnapping or being overly controlling at points. Thus I went with the explanation that he just doesn't know any better as his mother normalized this behavior, doing it to him and thus aiming to make him dependent on her. This is important later down the line to know when summarizing the last big plotpoint.

How did that go on Ann's side? Well, not so well as later down the line they saw it as the first 'betrayal'. They are used to people disappearing out of their life, Izumi having turned into the norm. They didn't know his mother was behind this so they understood it as 'He is tried of me and doesn't want to play with me.' When Ann even looks back on everything, they notice that they were all alone anyway.

Back then… What was it all like back then? It was hard for Ann to pinpoint down. Ever since when little they would describe themselves as a ‘misfit’ in one way or another. Maybe as a kid they didn’t let it get to them is all. After all, life seemed easier at the early stages. Worry about the little things in life, focus on playing and just enjoy the time. It was how they lived in the end: Enjoy the moment. Nothing more, nothing less. It may be the inexperience and temporary ignorance, making them not think about such details. That’s why when still a little child, they could ignore these things altogether.

Sure, almost everyone looked at them weirdly and made fun of them, but back then they could just laugh it off. ‘ Haha, that’s funny~ ’ they would always tell the other kids when they were making a joke at little Ann’s expense… Solely because they did not understand the severity of their words. And it was unlikely that the other kids had understood. Besides, they were too busy being all over the place and playing all sorts of games. Pretend, catch, hide and seek, climbing trees, soccer, drawing nonsense on concrete with chalk— There was no time to think about it. They were having fun. But when thinking back, it was never in a set group like the other kids. They just bounced around,like some ball being thrown. And yet, they did not understand it. It might be because of their lack of understanding when it came to the world. They were so naive that they managed to live a life in ignorance. And maybe that would have been a life for the better.

They wouldn’t mind being alone then if it was just that. Not like there was anyone, really. Even as a kid, when they thought that they had found someone to play with for some time, the boy just vanished— Or rather Izumi vanished. Someone they noticed they had grown close to, at least a little. Sure, he was a bit of a crybaby and seemed to be overwhelmed with Ann at points— Heck, he barely talked (unaware at the time that he could not communicate with them in the same language) but they somehow managed to communicate something. So they had to be close, right? Or so this little, naive kid chose to believe at first.

It was a fun few weeks, sure, but one day he just stopped showing up. What did they think about it back then? Well, it felt like a blow in their face back then once having come to that realization. ‘ Did I scare him? Or was he just bored of me? Or did he never like me to begin with? ’ It hit harder than they would like to admit. They never wanted to admit it. Luckily other kids approached them shortly after and invited them over for a game of jump rope and they accepted. They thought it was forgotten ever since yet it was the first of many blows.

And it only got worse from there. The treatment they received from others back in the day when growing older led them into isolation. Friends came and went, them even being backstabbed despite being promised that they would never leave them. This led them to believe that no relationship, unless family, is eternal. This is also why they have a hard time communicating. The language barrier is an excuse rather than a thing (like they will be talking when under the influence but regular Ann is very hesitant bonding properly with others and for a long while would not call anyone their friend). They are scared to create meaningful bonds, believing they will be shoved aside anyway. And again, while Izumi is not the sole reason for it, he may as well have kickstarted this.

To finish off the childhood section I should note... "Ok how do none of the two notice they are the kids on the playground!?"

In Ann's case it is simple - They forgot for a good while and stopped bothering with it. And the face had slipped their mind until seeing it again.

As for Izumi... Well, the girl looked as follows:

And the girl, she didn’t look like one at all to begin with. At least not like one he usually saw around or what Mama had told him what a girl would be like. If it wasn’t for her voice little Izumi would think that she was a guy actually. Short, brown, messy hair, shorts, a shirt way too big for her and a pair of trainers. No dress, no accessories, not even make up. And she was not scared too from what he saw. She sometimes fell over and scraped her knee but laughed it off rather than crying over it. She loved climbing trees, playing ball or just running around and circles for the heck of it. No dolls, no stuffies. She even got herself dirty and she was never, ever bothered by it. She was odd, to say the least, yet he was jealous all the same.

And even in future he would describe 'the little girl' as the opposite of Ann - Lively, reckless, upbeat, ready to have fun and approach others. Heck, he even sometimes may have imagined what the girl turned out to be nowadays... Not imagining that this would be Ann at first glance (hint at a childhood crush? Maybe... Leave that up to interpretation here).

Ok, this covers just the childhood basics (I am almost an hour in holy-). Next I will move on to the development in the present. Because give it over a decade and the two would meet each other again... Without knowing it at first that is.

“S… Sorry… I…Here to…” They continued stuttering yet he interrupted them from one moment to the next, having raised his own voice: “Speak up, would you!? And how about you try to speak in full sentences! This is pathetic to listen to!”

Hearing this made them nearly grumble. Something rubbed them the wrong way. What the hell was this guy thinking? This was as bad as they heard so far. And it has not even been a minute! Oh great…

They felt one of their hands forming a fist yet they tried to not to let it get to them. Maybe it was just a… Terrible first impression.

“Uhm… I… Can’t talk… Much Japanese…” They responded, very slowly, trying to keep their composure the best way they possibly can.

At most they only got one of his eyebrows rising, him then scoffing: “Talk? Don’t you mean ‘speak’?” It wouldn’t be something they would usually take offense to but the way he said it, so mockingly… It made their blood boil, almost literally. Especially once he took a closer look, to say the least. He then added however: “Wait… You’re not from here, are you?”

“Yeah.” They nodded yet with somewhat visible annoyance. Yet he decided to ignore it or had not noticed.

“Ok fine, I won’t pick on your poor choice of words.”Oh how generous… “But quit the stuttering, will you? It’s annoying.”

Wha— Less stuttering? Less stuttering!? How!? They had to think about their words here! This guy is an inconsiderate shithead alright!? They made on attempt in hiding it at that point, being beyond furious at that point. “Ugh… If so, how about English?”

Though they would not even wait for an answer, adding: “Hah, no. Whatever. Picking up! You!”

“Huh? Picking me u—” He was about to repeat though would then come to a realization. “Hey, you’re that ‘Wolff’ person, aren’t you?”

They nodded, though somewhat forcefully. “Yeah. I’m Anja–Sophie Wolff. And I—”

“I didn’t ask for your name, did I?”

“Well… No, but—”

A sudden glare from the dimwit in front of them. “I’ve got a bone to pick with you then! Do you know how long I waited here!? Did you even try looking!?”

A grumble escaped their very own lips, more audible than before. They then glared back, massively annoyed. They are getting more and more pissed at this point. Not furious, pissed.

“If you wanna walk and sweat, please. I’ll drive with not you.”

They said it sharp and bluntly, not even resisting by then. No, he is not as bad as they said… He’s worse than they said! That Arschloch!

Needless to say, their 'welcome back' greeting ended in disaster. The two start arguing pretty much right away and do not hide that they hate each other's guts. For a while, them arguing is the norm whenever they come across another. Izumi finds a way to belittle Ann whenever he can (may it be their way of speaking, their clothes or 'not doing their job properly' (they are just pissing him off with the last one)) . Meanwhile they shoot insults at him and cannot stand how he is looking down at them, insulting them in his own way. They are just busy hating each other... Right?

“See what I mean? They’re totally got something going on.”

“I don’t know about that… Secchan is about to try something horrible on Ann–Chan…”

“No no no. You don’t understand! They’re so into it! They won’t notice us!”

A quick sigh from the soft sounding voice. “I mean… I guess the image would be funny. Hmm…”

[...]

“Haha, it’s all good. Are you done flirting now?” This employee then joked, only to be met with two sharp glares at once.

“We’re not flirting you idiot!” The model yelled in pure anger. What the hell was this guy’s deal? The two were clearly fighting over here! How can anyone even think this is flirting, let alone joke about it!?

[...]

“Uh… Just don’t kill each other while I’m gone…” Ritsu threw in, though still half asleep, making it impossible to tell if he was being serious or not.

“Oh, and don’t do that at work!” The employee of course had to say. “If you know what I mean~ Do it while we’re all go–”

“Shut up we won’t!” The two arguing said in perfect sync, the only thing they may agree on for their entire life.

Basically a listing of the oldest clichées in the book - Other characters pointing it out (as in "Yep, they're gonna bang") and even them talking in sync without noticing. Are they really hating each other or are they just saying that? Is it really that shallow or is there more going on? Well, ask Leo Tsukinaga! ... No, seriously...

And whenever they screamed Leo couldn’t help but grow curious. It was a few times he even got inspired and started scribbling, their voices serving as his background noise. It was insightful sometimes and some of his latest compositions were based on just them quarreling. Others might be annoyed but he finds it funny and it also makes him somewhat happy. In his eyes, Sena finally found someone who he can be on such open terms with. Even if the relationship is bad, being so honest with each other takes a lot. One might call it naivety but to Leo this was just common sense. If you butt heads so much, you had to be close! Only those close can be so open with one another. There was more going on than everyone would realize! It is simple logic in the composer’s point of view, a logic so flawed for many but to him it made somewhat sense. And besides, one of the employees does not seem to disagree with him either from what he heard! Maybe it was some kind of sixth sense at the time but the way the two argued was different from the tension building up between the members of Knights sometimes. It was such an honest clash of emotions, he couldn’t help but translate their screams and cries into notes, a piece of music, a memory of the moment. It helped him understand it all the better if he were completely honest and that is how he drew the following conclusions.

Basically and also with the things I established ahead... No, this is not a simple hatred. Things are more complicated yet they do not notice that at first. Some people might even argue that the two have something going on yet both get defensive about this. "I hate him/them!" basically and that is how things go for a good while. Though that is changing over time...

I will summarize the plot a little here: Long story short Nyeli is also there and Izumi acts as if he hates Nyeli, thinking it is for the better anyway. Ann at first believes it is Izumi being a shithead as always.

They think not much of it and when Ritsu makes an observation how conflicted Nyeli actually feels about Izumi, portraying him as a 'Black Knight' in his drawings, Ann dismisses it at first. For a while they are blind and prejudiced towards Izumi after all, thinking he is an asshole by default. They are also in disbelief when Sora tells them about 'Izumi's kind color' later on. How can he be kind!? A guy who does not hesitate to be just blunt with his words and talk down on others!? Who treats Nyeli like literal garbage!? They are confused about that, by a great deal.

What convinces them is essentially a nightmare, one could argue it was something they kind of started to pick up on yet didn't want to admit to. At first it manifested in their fear of loneliness. Add that others say that he isn't so bad they start to observe closer to see what others mean. They say nothing, just watch Izumi from time to time interacting with others. And while they are still convinced that he can be a bit annoying they start to slowly catch on.

Then again, it might only answer why the cat didn’t hate that jerk completely and portrayed him in one of the images. But that was it. They were not much closer to anything else… ‘ Taking pity on the lowest of the low ’, the line haunted them even now. It was all so weird, they didn’t get it. The more they dug up about Izumi, the more confusing of a person he became to them. An Arschloch , they would still not deny that. But at the same time he was… Also not one? Ugh, this was confusing. More than it should have been. It made their head hurt… It led to nothing.

Same goes to the issue with Nyeli, Ritsu having noted that Nyeli behaves very differently when it comes to Izumi as a whole - It's not exactly hate but Nyeli is shallow, almost empty even. He doesn't 'hate' Izumi, that much they learn to admit. The situation isn't that black and white in the end.

As for Izumi during all of this, he is still not fond of Ann.

When it comes to the definition of a brat, there was no one Izumi knew any better than Ann themselves. This little shit felt entitled to everything. Even the smallest thing. They dared to talk back, they dared to raise their voice, they dared to not listen to him. Then again, these would usually just be inconveniences at most and he wouldn't pay much attention to it. They are just a brat who’d need to be disciplined, yet he didn’t have the energy to do that. It was not his job to set them straight. And usually, it would stay just there. An inconvenience, an annoyance… But that’s about it. However, Izumi had taken note of everything happening to him whenever just around Ann. He knew the rage building up had slowly become personal.

At first he just saw them as a nuisance: A mess of a person who cannot do anything right. And he was ready to call them out on that. The way they dress is a mess, they may work a lot yet manage to mess up the fundamental basics (either by accident or on purpose, with him Izumi felt like it was completely on purpose at points) and them trying to speak was a slog to get through. Stuff which shouldn’t be anything personal to him, especially since Ann seems to try for the most part.

Yeah, nothing to add here. So imagine his annoyance when they try to approach Izumi directly about something regarding Nyeli... They literally chase him down the hall even, not allowing him to escape. In the end he is forced to talk to them regarding Nyeli.

“Fine.... You want to know what me and the cat’s deal is? I’ll tell you.” He responded, trying to stick with his annoyed act. “Will you stop pestering me if I tell you?”

When hearing his response they lifted their head up, a little in surprise. Yeah, he didn’t believe it either. He was listening to their request. Yet they nodded despite this sudden shock.

“And you keep your mouth shut while I’m talking. Ask questions afterwards. Did I make myself clear?”

So basically Izumi tells Ann about how he knew Nyeli and of his true name, Patch, and both stories do not add up. Nyeli looked more as if he was placed as a stray but Izumi claims the kitty ran away from home, insisting on it even. Having this not add up they decide to initiate that the two fix their misunderstanding by forcing them to sit down and bond... This goes horrible at first, who is surprised? NO ONE! Heck, even Izumi is not sure what to say and Nyeli is refusing at first as well. It isn't until having been suggested the 'get to know him again' approach that Izumi manages to break the ice and bond with Nyeli again, reaching a point where one can leave the two alone after a while. While the effort came from the two mainly Ann initiated it at least, allowing the two to bond again.

One issue resolved, another one approaching. Or rather two. This connection now leads to Izumi and Ann hanging out more as well, thanks to Nyeli. And maybe they start growing more fond of another yet none would admit it. Well, Ann says nothing, but Izumi...

"You've got time this Saturday, don't you? Of course you do! Meet me in front of this building at exactly 10 am! And not a second later! If you do, I will make sure that you won't hear the end of it! Be on time!"

Before Ann could even agree Izumi had just dashed right out of their office, feeling that his own face had to be the spitting image of embarrassment. What had he been saying just now? Why was he saying nonsense like that!? 'Meet me in front of this building at 10 am'!? What was he doing!? Inviting that klutz to a date!? No, that wasn't it! The idea would never cross his mind! Then again… What would he even do with them around? He didn't even give them a choice, nor a response. Would they even show up!?

Totally not liking them, not at all. Either way, it is during that time where he comes to some ugly truth again, by this conversation...

“You sounding like Mami— I mean my Mom.” Ann added, unimpressed by this argument yet he decided to ignore it… At first yet he turned back soon enough when hearing one word… He didn’t know but it had just caught his attention right then and there.

“What? Did your Mom pick the meals for you or something?” He asked, almost mocking though that was to mask his curiosity which was met with a sheepish grin.

“Uh… She can cook so… No complaints for meals, heh…”

“Are you serious? And you want to live alone. I can’t believe your parents made you do that…”

“Made?” They suddenly tilted their head all of a sudden, confused. “No one made me go.”

Hearing that made the male nearly drop onto the table, staring at them wide eyed. “No one… Made you go? Then why are you here?” This was news to him, almost unbelievable. Their mother did not choose for them? Was that even possible!? It sounded so… Surreal.

“Because I want to.” They responded quickly, plain and simple. “Well… Guess we’re here so may as well reveal stuff.”

“Wh… What are you—”

“I like Japan. And stuff from Japan! Want to see it so I went. Uni exchange programm stuff! Plus Germany can be stinky~”

Basically learning that they are doing this of their own choice. Why is this important? Well, as said before, keep in mind that I established that Izumi heavily depends on his mother and does more of what she tells him to, what he needs to be. So hearing that Ann gets a choice... It gets to him yet he has no idea why at first until he thinks about it... And when noticing that everything just comes crashing down on him and he is so confused that he cannot focus on anything. Knowing no one to turn to he picks Ann yet he himself isn't sure why, and just breaks down. He expects to be shooed away yet they do not do that. Instead they let him inside their home and both talk about what is going on.

Basically the idea is that Izumi is too confused to continue, wanting to reevaluate what he wants, not what his Mom told him to be. This leads to a temporary retirement from idol activities, 1-2 months, with the agreements with Knights. To catch a break from everything he even considers moving out of the dorms.

“Now what? Heading to Florenz?” They continued asking, somewhat curious and interested. He didn’t understand why, it was still somewhat irritating. But he didn’t hate it. Not anymore.

“It’s an option.” Izumi admitted with a sigh, though it didn’t sit completely right with him, oddly enough. “But the chance of me drowning myself in work there is high. And that’s not exactly the plan, is it?”

“Haha, yeah. Get it. I drown in work too.” They said, stating the absolute obvious. It only made his eyes roll.

“Oh no, I thought the papers on your desk were just for show.” He added with obvious sarcasm, making them nearly glare at him.

“Hey, not funny!”

“I wasn’t being funny.”

What this leads to is essentially him temporarily moving in with Ann after they offered.

“Then mine could do!” They suddenly suggested, sounding almost a little too eager for his liking. But he couldn’t comment on it, more surprised if anything to hear that of all things. He even looked at them, not hiding this thought whatsoever.

“Come again?”

“My place!” Ann repeated, sounding as if they just had a genius idea here. “Not minding at all!”

“Your… Place? That mess? You really expect me to—”

“You don’t have to!” They suddenly huffed with a pout. “Just trying to help. But search or the streets. Hmph!”

Basically the idea is to get a place where he could be away for a while and had no risk to get into too much work also plot but ssh. So the two start living together for a short while (have fun ina crowded one room apartment)

Happy e- No, no. So wrong. No happy end. Because this is where things boil down yet are also the turning point. Basically the childhood thing is found out there, Ann finding out by coincidence by throwing a box over and seeing a picture of Izumi as a kid... Then it all comes back to them and they drop his nickname, 'Izuzu'. And that is where he also notices... Ann is that 'little girl' he remembered.

Thus the first day is awkward, Ann giving Izumi the silent treatment. They insist that it's fine but it clearly isn't. He is somewhat overcome with guilt and tries to apologize yet they tell him not to, saying that this is what they are used to. No need to wo-

“That…” He finally began speaking yet again, them looking right at Izumi to see what his response would be. Ann didn’t expect much, even now, so his next words surprised them. “Sounds pathetic.”

It was as if he was verbally punching them right in the guts and it nearly made them furious… Though for different reasons, something they couldn’t exactly put into words. “Pathetic?”

“Oh you heard me right. So you’re saying that for whatever reason I don’t need to apologize? Because you’re used to this? Is that what I’m hearing?”

They nodded. “Yeah, it’s–”

“Are you serious!? Did I listen to some sorry loner all this time!?” He seemed upset, not an unusual sight for Ann. And yet, this time it had a different undertone, to say the least. “Then why bother with this all to begin with!? You make no sense… Unless you got some savior complex going on.”

[...]

“So, I assume that you need someone to push you around. And since you pushed me around to make up with Patch, I suppose I will push you around a little now!” He continued, determination somewhat written over his face. “So quit saying stuff like that! I’m not gonna leave you by yourself if I can help it!”

Yeah, he's not gonna listen to this. Ann is in disbelief, not believing their ears at that point. They first think that it's a lie but...

They can tell at the same time that it is not, if that makes sense. Or maybe they are hopeful at this moment. Not like he gives them a choice anyway...

“In fact, I guess we have some catching up to do. Are you free tomorrow?”

“Eh? Me!?” They repeated in shock. It has been years since they were asked that. Ok no, technically it was not too long ago, given Izumi dragged them out that one weekend but it didn’t change that this was a surprise. Being asked if they were free, just like that… Such a simple question shouldn’t make them want to jump up in joy or nearly break out crying but it was too much to handle. It has been a while since anyone asked this of them, anyone who is not family at least. And they were perhaps a little too happy hearing it. “Uni lectures in the morning but… Not a work day I—”

“Hah, guess something like that takes priority. So good enough. Now go to bed!” Izumi suddenly insisted. “The moment you get back here it’ll just be the two of us!”

“Wha— Hah!? Said who!?”

“I said so!” He countered with a sudden grin on his face. “Now hop to it. I don’t wanna drag you around in the afternoon.”

So for a while things become peaceful and not much is going on. Essentially it is all bonding primarily, either between the two or Izumi and Nyeli doing something together. Almost done, great.

First we need to get the confession out of the way... But honestly that boils down to the following - Knights notices that Izumi has grown closer to Ann and even talks about them differently, even seeing them as a 'woman' (the they/them he used before was to indicate that he didn't see them as much actually. She/Her is fine since this Ann doesn't correct anyone about pronouns, even if they themself refuse to identify). At first he tries to deny it but...

When thinking back on some things… Was there a chance? The two were kinda on dates before after all. And ever since seeing more of her, let alone living with her… Things go smoother. He kind of liked it actually, growing fond of her. At first he thought it was just because she was the little girl from years ago and it might play a factor. He would lie if he said it didn’t. But… Even before that… To some degree… Ugh, that’s a headache to think about. Did he seriously start to see her that way now? He wouldn’t know when, he just hated it that Naru–Chan’s outrageous claim could hold some weight. Ugh, not like these feelings would be returned though.

He cannot deny it. And Ann cannot escape it either. Nyeli asks them if they are in love with 'brothnya' (basically Izumi), they do not exactly answer the question. All they say is that 'there is no way that he will like me'. Then that random employee asks them as well.

That had his attention a little. It wasn’t a flatout ‘no’ after all. Hoho~ “Did you just say maybe?”

“Ah— That— Who knows, that’s all!”

“Maybe. So you’re considering it. Of course you are. You seem to actually enjoy being around Sena after all.”

“Never thought I’d see the day…”

“Oh, you should read up on your tropes then.”

“Life isn’t tropey!” She would argue either way. “Anything but tropey!”

“Hey, I’m just throwing it out there. You two just gave off the vibe you know.”

“How!?”

“I already said how. Anyway, anyway… Embrace it! Enjoy your existence as a couple! If none of the higher ups find out, you are in the clear~”

One of her eyelids seemed to twitch at the suggestion yet the redness did not disappear. “W… We… Not…”

“Haha, discuss it first. I’m sure you two will be juuust fine~”

“What—”

“Enough from me though. I have somewhere to be. Won’t be here for a while actually. So… Best of luck! Go get him girl!”

The conversations make the two think yet also say nothing for a few days to another... Until it escalates...

And thus they were silent yet again, finishing up their meals respectively before putting their bowls and chopsticks (or a fork in Ann’s case) down, first facing the table before both turned their heads up to face one another all of a sudden, staring at each other… Wait, she’s red too!? What is the meaning of that!? But old habits die hard because before they knew it they would start yelling at each other again, Ann starting.

“You brought it up!? Meaning!?”

“What do you mean ‘meaning’!? I’m not trying to say anything by that!”

“Then why say that!?”

“Because you’re silent all week!”

“You too! You wanna date suddenly!?”

“Hah!? D… Don’t be ridiculous! It’s nothing like that! I’m not desperate!” Despite being aware he was still denying it verbally… Great… “You point it out so what are you trying to say!? That you want to date me!?”

“Hah!? I… No! Not desperate!” Ann denied however, flushed red.

“Yeah right! Sounds like to me you fell for me you know!”

“Me!? You fell!” She countered, as if confident in that statement but also not really. It was rather odd, to say the least. and yet the indication was all too obvious.

“Hah! I won’t admit it if you don’t!”

“Ok fine! I may fell in love! With you!”

“There we go! Because I think so do I!”

It leads to a confession though and things become official! Happy e-

“Why hello there~ Are you my little Izumi’s roommate~?” The voice was an older one, feminine and sounding ever so sweet. Even after having not heard it clearly for a good few months he would never be able to forget this voice, given he had heard the one all his life. He couldn’t move, unable to say anything and the words wouldn’t leave him. Well, he wasn’t talking to anyone at the moment yet his throat felt dry, somewhat. He knew who this was, better than anyone…

“G… Good morning?” He heard Ann stutter, as if she was overwhelmed by this sudden entrance. Well, who wouldn’t be? It came out of literal nowhere! “Uhm.. By Izumi… Miss, you mean—”

“Hm? Oh right, you don’t know who I am. Silly me, I usually don’t bother with no names~” The woman responded, not stopping with her ever so sweet tone, despite her words. “You should’ve seen my face around already though, shouldn’t you? I was in every fashion magazine known to man~”

“I.. Uhm… Do not read—”

“Then start sweetie. How can you run around in some old rags like that~? No sense for fashion at all, haha~”

Yeah uh... I hope you still remember me mentioning Izumom... She's here, at the end. There's a point to this. Let me introduce you to her as the story puts it!

Sena Kimiko, a woman in her 40s at most. Even then, no one would probably suspect that to be the case at all. She looked very young for her age after all, a standard for the model industry. There was not a single wrinkle in her face and she never had any bags under them either. No scars nor beauty marks. Her face was never tarnished, it was as if she had been blessed with natural beauty. All combined with sparkling, dark blue eyes and long, wavy yet slightly thick silver hair. Her hair especially seemed flawless; no sign of bed hair nor any mess. It was always so clean, in tip top shape, healthy and shining.

Her body was also something else– A slim figure with a respectable waist and chest. Not too big yet not too small either. Her measurements were just right. Any outfit of her choice will be a perfect fit no matter what. Most would be jealous of it, even other models. She is desired in the industry, her pride lying in her modeling. She is the ideal doll and she is more than aware. She doesn’t shy away from it and makes sure to let everyone know. A woman who sees herself above everyone else, who made something out of herself and her natural beauty. She looks down on just about anyone yet feels like she has every right to do so. After all, she had already proven that she is superior to everyone else.

This is the type of woman Kimiko was and it might be an understatement to say that she fully embraced it. She never knew shame and never saw herself in the wrong. She usually knows better, especially when it comes to her own son. After all, if it were not for her, he would have never started making it as an idol and model. And she truly believes that her son is meant to become a legendary idol like she is… It was his path, wasn’t it? There was no other way, someone who inherited her beauty was always meant to show it off and become a perfect doll, just like she is!

Basically Kimiko has heard that her son is on a hiatus. As she is worried she figured out where he lives now and pays him a visit, just to see how he's doing. She is overbearing and goes to treat him like a little boy. Also she is not exactly holding her tongue either in regards to Ann. But she is just a worried Mo-

No, she ain't. She makes her intentions clear.

“But even then… Are you sure?”

Huh? “Sure of what Mama?” What was she—

“You see… Papa and Mama are worried sick about you Izumi. The last thing we expected from you was to go on a hiatus and disappear from the public eye.”

“Ah— I… I’m sorry for not telling you in advance! You two seem busy lately so—”

“No, it’s fine. Thank you for being so considerate. However, do you really want to stay with her?”

He only looked at his mother, shocked yet irritated. What is she—

“You can always come home, you know, even if only for a short while. After all, we will help you sort things out.”

“I…”

“After all… Mama and Papa know you better than some random, little, barbaric girl. We know what’s best for you.”

She also catches on that the two are dating and needless to say, Kimiko hates it. Yet of course she doesn't say it outright, not towards Izumi at first at least. But she is trying to rig something. And she shows up too much at that home, even uninvited.

And her reaction to Nyeli... Not too good.

Because the moment she had turned her eyes lost all of their life, oddly enough, and her pupils were as dead as they could be. It was all happening so fast, from one moment to the next, yet the next audible thing was a sudden scream from her lips, so loud that it made Nyeli curl his ears so he didn’t have to hear it and close his eyes, tearing up already. He even held them with his nubs, trying to keep them in place. It was probably unbearable for him, not even soft pats could get the cat to calm down.

It left all of them in a shock, Ann staring at the woman in utter disbelief, mouth gaping open. What was her deal now? What!? How!? Why!? This woman… The nerve…

“M… Mama!? What’s gotten into you!?” It was a little forced and stuttery but Izumi managed to ask it in the end, the question which had been in their mind right away. Would she answer it though? Of course not. At this very moment it was as if her own son did not exist, or was not present at the very least.

Instead she stomped over while dashing, getting as close as possible while eyeing Nyeli, even circling around somewhat. Kimiko’s head was moving around like an automatic door, swaying side to side in an unnatural motion. All while her face was devoid of any sort of emotion, her dark blue eyes lacking emotion especially. She didn’t quit it either, eyeing Nyeli as if Ann had been holding a tiny monster in their hands, a creature of some sorts. It took minutes before she backed off, though still looking down at the cat with her gaze. “The brute? What is that doing here?” She asked, no shame, hesitation nor emotion. She was cold, very cold, and direct. No sugarcoating it whatsoever… Brute? Brute!? Did she just call Nyeli a brute!?

Kimiko is basically feeling threatened that she is losing control here, something she makes very obvious. And while Izumi is in denial Ann shows that they despise this woman down to the core.

Their conversation alone together with Kimiko even leads to this line:

“Wenn du mich fragst… Schlampen sollten ihren Mund zum Schwanzlutschen benutzen und ihre Schnauze halten. Mach dich nützlich. Du siehst zumindest so aus, als ob dich Männer ficken wollen.”

Basically Ann calls Kimiko a slut who only has a mouth good for sucking dick and she is only useful for being fucked by guys. Yeah, this is meant to be very vulgar.

The consequences come down and Kimiko is actually close to taking Izumi with her, no questions asked. Though that does not happen because by then Izumi starts to finally realize what his mother is trying, what she wants to push him into. Not to mention that he learns that Nyeli disappearing was her fault and no one else's. This is just a short summary because the conflict is longer but read the longfic I save you that much trouble. What you have to know is that he stands up to his mother and throws her out himself, deciding to no longer listen to her.

Sometime after that Izumi resumes his idol activities yet also secretly dating Ann... 'Secretly' as Knights know too, the bunch caught on asap, yet they keep it a secret in public as well of course. But they are nosy... Arashi especially, she is having a field day here.

Why did I just go through the longfic, somewhat? Because it is essentially the get together story as well as the foundation of everything following up I write with them now. Basically I wanted to outline shortly how these two go from hating each other to being a thing. And I think knowing the entire story adds to how they got where they are now, how it all had gone down. Of course the story covers more than the simple romance but it plays a factor here. I wanted to outline the time where the hatred starts to change and how the two are so close.

With that analysis done... I have more thoughts! Yes, still not done, but close. This is literally just the longfic’s plot.

So, what is next and some other stuff I think about a lot / will write out in near future…

So firstly, of course the constant lingering fear for a while. Sure, the two overcame quite a bit but here's the deal... That doesn't mean that they are free from worries.

Izumi has to constantly worry that his mother just shows up, especially now. Also him having a hint of insecurity maybe, given how he and Ann started out that it is not enough and he could lose them in turn (I wrote a Hanahaki oneshot for a reason, outlining the fear that maybe he doesn't love them or something like that). He doesn't show it a lot of course, not wanting to come off as weak.

Ann themself is constantly in a battle as well, never seeing themself as good enough. Their fear of being left like that is there for some time, either for being a nuisance or for someone better. They believe that they cannot find a reason for him to stay; he will leave eventually.

This leads into a plotpoint for Part II (yes there will be a second longfic... I am insane, I know) where Ann tries to exhaust themself to the bone to write a movie script themself, even driving insane from it. They want to 'prove their worth'.

"I… I was scared… That you would… Leave me if I… I failed and… I can't do much else so I… I…"

"Stop with that. No, seriously, stop. So what if you can't write that script?"

"A… Am I tha–"

"Let me finish! Because I am happy for you to get this chance and show your skills off. But here's the thing… You're more than your writing, alright? You've already proven that. And those guys who take it at face value? Screw them. Those who really care will see you for you, no matter who. So even if you hadn't gotten this chance, we would not be disappointed. And by we I mean your parents, Patch, that guy you call your 'brother', Kuma–Kun, the rest of Knights and… Me too. So stop putting yourself down like that, will you?"

They are told that this is bs of course and they are more than a script.

They sure still got some things to work through of course!

Enough about insecurities!

As for some more fun stuff, or rather calmer... More light hearted stuff to keep in mind or I shall list

Bickering is still here and there of course. Nothing changing there, yet they no longer insult another

Nagging is not uncommon though. Ann is not known for healthy habits so Izumi sure nags a lot there, having to force them to be healthier sometimes. He will also scold them should he catch them up at midnight when in Florenz. Oh yes, he is phoning them up just to yell "GET THE FUCK TO BED!"

They fluster at each other. Ann is a little clingy and touchy (mostly wholesome, though depending on the mood it can be a little more than that), catching Izumi off guard. He sometimes even tries to resist their begging for a hug or other things, solely to not 'spoil them'. He's just embarrassed yet cracks eventually. Of course this is in private, sometimes within the office as well, yet in public it doesn't go too far. As for how he catches them off guard... When he suddenly puts on the charm he literally makes them unable to function, sometimes even running with a beet red face because it is too much for them to handle. No, really, their brain just stops working altogether.

Secret relationship because of what would happen if fans found out an idol is dating someone, that they are unavailable. Some people find out yet keep it a secret as well.

Who is more jealous? Uh... Hard to say, I think it is more circumstantial, maybe even who it is.

A world is shattered when Izumi hears Ann is a fan of Jun Sazanami... I jest not really after they explain that they just like his performance as an idol, being a fan of his like they would be for a musician (if that makes sense) yet it sure led to an interesting conversation.

And that is all! For now. Izuann has necome a bigger beast than anticipated and yeah, I might enjoy the two way too much from a writing perspective. Even if I do not show it lately but I think a longfic of 80k+ words is all the proof needed. And a second one is in the works (currently at the roadmap).

I hope this was fun to read through! Even if it was more of an analysis than a ramble...

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kymsys · 1 month

Text

'It was late spring, the first time all year that the sunshine had any real strength behind it. Satoru was wittering on about something inane as always — Tentomon or something equally ridiculous.

There was nothing special about the moment. Not really. Except for the fact that Satoru had shrugged off his jacket in the heat. It was draped around his shoulders just so, exposing the long column of his throat, pale after a long winter. Really, there was nothing special about the moment. But when Suguru looked at the boy silhouetted against the spring sky, bright and blue and boundless and beautiful — just like his eyes, Suguru thought — his heart skipped a beat all the same. With all the sight afforded to him, Satoru never missed a thing. So it was risky, what Suguru did. Later, when he was looking at his new phone wallpaper under the cover of darkness, grinning like an idiot, he'd wonder how he ever got away with it. Yet, if Suguru's yearning to capture that perfectly ordinary moment forever was stronger than all reason, perhaps it was stronger than the Six Eyes, too. After all, not even Satoru could stop time.' - by my beloved @fushiglow ♥

(( also glo says: FUN FACT! Tentomon is voiced by Suguru's VA — ergo it's Satoru's favourite Digimon, obviously )) ---------------------------------------------------------

freshly added headcanons: • gojo at some point randomly barged into sugurus room and put glowy stickers all over his ceiling • suguru has gojo as his phone wallpaper, but keeps it a secret • suguru is a hamasaki ayumi fan • the cinnamoroll phone charm is from gojo who spent almost an eternity getting that out of a gatcha machine for him • they were happy

#look what glo did #pls all go check out glos writing #so basically i made a small little sketch of gojo and the glo came up with this whole ass cute story around it #AND I LOVED IT SO MUCH THAT I HAD TO DRAW IT #and here we are #i love them so much #i feel very normal about them #gojo satoru #geto suguru #jujutsu kaisen #satosugu #stsg #jjk #kymsys art

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onlyoneofyouu · 1 year

Text

youtube

this wasn't supposed to make me cry.

#THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY #NOT MAKING ME HAVE TEARS IN THE CORNERS OF MY EYES #i can't believe i've been with txt for two years already now #it feels unreal #it's too soon to be two years already #it was just yesterday when my bestie S made me listen to eternally and i was too stunned to speak #and then fairy of shampoo became our song #and can't you see me was there for me when i needed that during the pandemic #it was past winter when M sent me that edit of nine with antiromantic #it was last summer that loser=lover come out and i sang it with my friends in the car at sunset #it was a few months ago when i saw act:lovesick and almost cried because eternally had a choreo #it was only last semester when i started listening to crown and run away on the way to uni to feel less alone when i wasn't feeling well #and when i started listening to blue hour while on the train going home with the sunset smiling like an idiot #PUTTING WISHLIST IN THE VIDEO WAS WHAT BROKE ME. UNFAIR. UNCALLED FOR.#i'm so grateful for txt and their music to be part if my life #*sighs*#this wasn't supposed to be a rant but i guess it happened #tubatu my beloved ❤#txt #jothingz #Youtube

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strongheartneteyam · 11 months

Text

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!human!reader/female!dreamwalker!reader

Neteyam is aged up.

Chapter 2

Synopsis: Reader is unhappy with her human life. She works for the lab as a cook. She's a Dreamwalker and she spends every free day she gets walking through Pandora's forests. In one of those days, Neteyam sees her but she doesn't notice him. He falls in love, seeing how happy she is amidst nature. Neteyam finds out she's actually a human in an Avatar, so, he finds a way to go where her real body is. He hates to admit it but, seeing her in her human body, he realizes he still loves her. After watching her, he notices how she's always happier when she's in her Avatar, so, he develops a deeper connection to her. However, he becomes obsessive. Reader has only heard about him, the famous son of Jake Sully and future Olo'eyktan, praised for his great achievements as a young Omatikaya. After getting reader's attention, Neteyam asks her to choose to live forever in her Avatar, becoming his mate and making tsaheylu with him, gaining a new home as a fresh member of his tribe. Reader is scared and torn, since, even though she's intensely attracted to him and only truly enjoys life when she's Dreamwalking, she doesn't really know him and she's afraid of dying when trying to go past Eywa's eye. But Neteyam just won't give up on her that easily.

This is Reader's Avatar ♡

CW: angst, reader hates her life, neteyam is like her "secret admirer" but he eventually becomes obsessed, so, it gives off some creepy vibes, possessive neteyam, forbidden love, neteyam is REALLY protective over her, neteyam isn't really fond of humans (hates them) and only makes an exception for reader, TRIGGER WARNING for a few depression symptoms (such as reader holding back tears and looking miserable really often), stalking, obsessive behavior & possessiveness

•

Finally, this fanfic is out!! lots of people seemed to love the tiny sneak peek I posted so... I hope you guys will love the fanfic itself too hehe I'm so relieved I could finally post it ooof My environment is the worst EVER rn & i haven't had any motivation or focus to write lately BUT i seem to be getting out of that damned writer's block I was in (ITS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD UGH HATE IT TO DEATH)

Not proofread. My life is a hurricane, so, we don't work with proofread stories here. Hope you find it in your hearts to forgive me, my angels :')

na'vi words:

yawne - beloved

tsaheylu - the neurological bond the na'vi make with their mate, through their tendrils, at the end of their long braid.

Chapter 1

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

I love your touch, cold as ice

And I love every single tear you cry

I just love the way you're losing your life

Oh, my baby, how beautiful you are

Oh, my darling, completely torn apart

Gone With The Sin (HIM)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Neteyam would look at you every moment he could. He didn't have that much free time since he was the Olo'eyktan's son and had so many responsibilities weighting on his shoulders. But he would always make any sacrifice he needed to make to find time to see you. Even if it meant using the few hours he had to himself to contemplate you. His sad, gloomy-eyed, beautiful girl. You were not actually his yet, but, he was determined to make that change.

Neteyam saw you holding back tears way too damn often, so, he was always deeply worried about you, and, that was one of the reasons why he was always creeping around, high up in branches of trees located in Hell's Gate, watching over you, almost every day, ready to help you, defend you from any danger, to say "screw it" to how out of the blue it would be if he - a stranger, a male na'vi stranger - just came up to you and said "hey, I've been watching you for a while, and… I'm so, so in love with you. Please, leave this damn idiotic human life you live and let Eywa help you be transferred to your Avatar body for good, just like she helped my father. You're so insanely pretty like this - and I have never felt attracted to any female of your demon kind before, so, believe me when I talk about your beauty - but you look even prettier when you're in your Avatar form. Let me make you my mate, let me make you the future Olo'eyktan's mate. I can give you a far better life than the one you have now"

He knew he was just a weird alien boy (as the humans would probably say), stalking you, always up in the highest tree branches he could find and reach, watching a girl while she cooks - as it was your job - like a hunter watching their prey. But he meant no harm. On the contrary, he meant to take care of you, to save you from it all. Because he wasn't blind. Neteyam saw how unhappy you looked while peeling potatoes (he knew what they were because his dad who was once human told him and his siblings about how delicious that vegetable from Earth tasted, especially when it was made as French fries) to cook on the high-tech stove the humans used to prepare their meals in and prepare mashed potatoes to those damn lab guys who invaded his Planet and did nothing but harm.

Neteyam thought it to be unnecessary. His future mate could easily prepare the same potatoes in a bonfire he would light up for you in the Omatikaya forest. He knew they would taste even better roasted in the natural fire than just plainly cooked in that energy fueled cooking device the humans used. He could give you a life so incredibly better than the one you had right now, it pained him to see his yawne working so hard to feed every damn scientist in that cold, air-conditioned lab while not being as appreciated and thanked by them as you deserved to be. You could be preparing food to feed his children instead, the sons and daughters he would give you, if only you accepted becoming his forever mate.

He hated the humans. They didn't know how to lead a proper life. But you were different.

Neteyam knew how breathtaking you looked in a na'vi like body because the first time he saw you, you were in your Avatar body - as you were a Dreamwalker - and that's when he fell in love with you. But he learned to love your human body too. He could never hate you, even in your human form. You were the only human he did not despise.

The day Neteyam first saw you, he was out in the forest to hunt and gather food, collecting bladder polyps, lionberry seeds and trying to kill a hexapede, so, he could bring all of it home and him and his family could eat a nutritious dinner.

That's when he heard a squeaky, funny laugh. It was a female voice, he recognized. Neteyam followed that sound just like he was a sailor and the girl whose laugh he heard was a mermaid, bewitching his senses and drawing him closer.

When he saw you, it was like his heart was going to explode in a thousand pieces, so fast it was beating inside his rigid ribcage, so strongly the blood was being pumped through his arteries. He knew he had to make you his mate, to have you forever.

Neteyam had always been a practical and rational young man, he had to be. He was the eldest son and had to look after his 3 younger siblings and not show a single sign of weakness when his father would scold him in a harsh tone, whenever any of his siblings - specially his younger brother, Lo'ak -, got into trouble and somehow, Neteyam ended up having to take responsibility over their actions. "But that girl… that beautiful, ethereal girl… she makes me believe in things I've never even considered before. I know it sounds stupid to say that about a girl I just met, only some minutes ago but I don't care", he thought. Only he and Eywa herself knew the raw, powerful feeling he was experiencing at that moment. He just wanted to let go for a while. To not force himself to be all brains, zero heart for once, just once. And you were gifting him the opportunity to do just that. Your beauty was so enchanting, it could leave any creature in awe.

His father had once told him about Christianity, one of the most popular religions back on the glory days of the Planet Earth, and, of course he didn't follow those beliefs, his spirituality was completely based on Eywa, the Great Mother, the spirit and moving energy of Pandora, but, if the beings called "angels" his father talked about were real, Neteyam was utterly sure that they could only look like you.

You were perfect. Every curve of your body, every bioluminescent freckle, every pattern of your stripes, your long dark braided hair falling like water on your flawless back, as you kept smiling and touching every single flower you could see, playing in a foolish way, just like a child. He felt a primal urge coming from his guts to make tsaheylu with you right there, right at that moment.

So many thoughts roamed through Neteyam's mind: "I need her… right here, right now. She's… ugh… I've never felt anything like this before… What's going on with your stupid mind, Neteyam?! You can't just choose any girl to be your mate, you'll be the next Olo'eyktan, remember?! The best choice would be a girl who has a calling to be Tsahìk. Maybe your parents will try to arrange a marriage, to find the perfect match for you. Damn! Who am I trying to fool? She is the only perfect match for me…"

Neteyam started to watch you go about the forest every chance he got.

When he found out you were actually a Dreamwalker, a human in a body created in a laboratory, a hybrid of demon and na'vi, a freak... It was like his world was falling apart, piece by tiny piece crashing on the floor. How did he not notice your fifth finger before?! Was he that much under your spell, that blinded by how beautiful and charming you were?, he asked himself.

So, he told himself he was going to find a way to at least see what your true form looked like. He hissed at the thoughts and feelings you had caused him the whole way to Hell's Gate, where the laboratory was and where he knew all the humans that stayed in Pandora and had an Avatar stayed.

When Neteyam saw you in your human body, he got hit by something as strong as lightning. The moment he sniffed your sweet scent (the smell you had in your Avatar had notes of your original human scent, as your DNA was used to build that body), the moment he recognized that melodious voice… The expression in those eyes, that smile, that laughter… it was you. His yawne.

He didn't understand how that was possible, what he was feeling. Nevertheless, he realized he still loved you. His heart still beat fast for you. It didn't matter which physical form you took. Na'vi or human. You were you. And he loved you. Madly.

His people had a great contempt towards the ones who Dreamwalked. They were "demons in false bodies", like his grandma and his mother always said. And Neteyam himself felt the same. Worse, he had felt disgusted by the love and desire you made him feel, back when he watched you wandering around the Omatikaya lands, when you would jump like a little kid, so happy playing with the bioluminescent, neon plants of the forest.

But, still, that feeling lingered inside him. The attachment, the deep affection, the devotion… He could not comprehend it.

All Neteyam could grasp was that he hated all humans, but you were the only exception.

Even though you were originally human, you had a na'vi heart. He just knew that. As crazy and impossible as it sounded, he figured out it was true. And that blew his mind. That sorrowful girl he was seeing cooking in a small technological kitchen was not the same one he had seen at the forest. But it was, at the same time. It apparently made no sense, but it actually did. You were not where you belonged. You did not belong imprisoned among those four walls that the other humans kept you in. That you were keeping yourself in. You belonged free amidst the Pandoran trees. You did not belong in those big human clothes. You belonged in a comfortable loincloth and a big leaf necklace covering your beautiful breasts, letting the wind hit your skin.

You seemed out of place in that environment you were currently in. And that made Neteyam feel something so overpowering. He knew it was useless to try and fight it. He was not even sure if he even wanted to fight it anymore. That feeling was good. It felt just like what he felt when he thought you were a na'vi girl. He even felt attracted to you, even though he still thought you looked much prettier in your Avatar body.

He was fully aware you were one of the demons. But you were not like the rest of them. You were special. He could tell that. He could tell you'd be a hundred per cent happier if he could convince you to become na'vi. And that's exactly what he was planning to do. He still did not know how, but he would find a way.

༊⁀➷

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jo6hny · 3 months

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Neighbor - Hazel Callahan

Pairing: College! Hazel Callahan x College! Reader

Contains: fluff, kissing, slight angst, everyone knows you like each other besides the both of you, drunk hazel, reader being an idiot, hazel being an idiot, sylvie and isabel mentioned.

Word Count: 2.7k

Summary: A very drunk Hazel Callahan stumbles upon your dorm room thinking it was hers. What happens when your crush and next door dorm neighbor wriggles her way onto your bed?

A/N: This was written for the anon that requested it! I hope you like it <33 also, sorry if the description of college is inaccurate, i’m not american !! Requests are open!

Knock Knock.

The sound of the knock interrupts your reading. Curious, you get out of bed to see who it is. The comfort of your bed and the book in hand long forgotten as you made your way to your door. You rarely get visitors and your roommate, Sylvie, barely ever knocks. She’d usually just barge right in regardless of what you were doing.

“Hi neighbor.” The brunette greets you on the other side of the door with a smile and a small tupperware dish on her hands. It was Hazel, the girl who occupied the dorm room right across yours. She looked good today. Scratch that, she looked good everyday. There was just something about Hazel Callahan that was charming and adorable.

“Oh, hi Haze.” You smile, greeting her back. “What you got there?”

Hazel extended the dish towards you and said, “This is for you! There were some leftover brownies from the bake sale yesterday and I thought I’d give you some. I would hate for my beloved neighbor to starve.”

Your smile grew wider at your neighbor’s gesture. If you weren’t so blinded by hunger, you would have thought that she’d given these to you because she liked you. Not that she did, though. Hazel seemed to be friendly with everyone. And, well, she always seemed to deflect your advances.

“Aw Hazel,” You cooed, taking the dish from her. It felt hefty, the dish didn’t just contain a few pieces of brownies, it had a lot. Your heart swelled at the gesture.“Thank you so much! I’ll give you something back, I swear.”

Hazel shook her head at this.

“You don’t have to. You always do nice things for me, anyway.” She gave you a dimpled smile. Well, that is true. But it was a two way thing between you and her. Always watching out for each other, especially whenever there were inspections.

You couldn’t exactly pinpoint how you two became close, or well, acquainted. But you knew it was because of Sylvie. She and Hazel were best friends, have been since highschool. Sylvie always told you about their “fight club” back then and how it was a women empowerment thing that saved their school from…football players? The details weren’t exactly clear, especially with how fast your roommate talked. Anyway, you meet Hazel through Sylvie. They’d always hang out at your dorm or Hazel’s dorm, whichever was available. You didn’t mind when they were at yours, they usually just geeked out about weapons and bands and all that shit. Plus, Hazel was easy on the eyes. You could look at her all day if you were being honest. Her hair was dark and soft and always so fragrant. You imagined what it was like to run your hair through her locks, how it’d feel between your fingers. And her eyes were to die for. They were like opals in the sense that they shifted colors ever so often. Most of the time they were blue, but there were times when they’d look silver or green. All of these traits (and more) were what made her so enchanting.

“Well, no worries, Haze. We look out for each other.” You reply, putting a hand on her forearm. It wasn’t obvious, but Hazel’s breath picked up when you touched her. Because unbeknownst to you, she actually did return your feelings. The tension between the two of you was apparent to everyone except the two of you. Sylvie knows it, Hazel’s roommate Isabel did too. Basically everyone on campus did.

“So…” You trailed off. Hazel was too distracted by your touch, her mind was elsewhere. “Um, are you going to that frat party later?”

The blue eyed girl snaps out of her trance at your question and nods.

“Oh, yeah! I’m going with Isabel and Sylvie. Are you?”

“I can’t.” You sigh, slightly disappointed. This was supposed to be an opportunity for you to spend time with Hazel (and Sylvie and Isabel, of course).

“Oh.” Hazel said dejectedly. You picked up on your neighbor’s tone at your reply.

“Sorry, Haze.” You apologize, squeezing her forearm. This caused the brunette to short circuit again. “I have to finish reading this book for my lit class.”

“That’s-That’s okay.” She replied, feeling uncool at the way she stuttered.

“Maybe we can hang out another time?” You said, hinting at a date with her.

Hazel nods at your suggestion. “Yeah! We can bring Sylvie and Isabel too.”

A frown forms on your face at her suggestion which you quickly wipe off and replace with a smile.

“Yep. Sure.” You said, not feeling too enthusiastic. Was there something wrong with you? Did she not like you? You didn’t get why Hazel kept rejecting you.

“I’ll see you, then.” She replies, walking back to her dorm room across from yours.

Back at the comfort of her room, Hazel slaps the palm of her hand on her forehead. It only just registered to her that you wanted to hang out with her without Sylvie and Isabel.

“Stupid.” She muttered, letting herself dramatically fall onto her bed. The brunette groans at her inability to take cues. It’s not that she didn’t want to be with you, it’s just that she had a hard time taking in what you say sometimes. It was hard for her to discern things especially when you were in front of her. Hazel sometimes wished that she were normal. Normal enough to notice the little things. If she were, you two would have gone out by now. The brunette groans again at the thought and buries her head in her pillow.

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Finally onto the last chapter of your book, you decide to rest a bit before moving forward. Closing your eyes, you ease into your mattress a bit and let your head fall onto your soft pillow. A few more minutes you would fall asleep, the book forgotten. Sylvie seemed to have found herself back into your shared room as you heard the door being pried open. Weird though, she didn’t seem to make any noise as she entered. Usually she’d announce her entrance and make herself known. Oh well, maybe she had too much to drink. Back to resting.

“Mmph.” A voice that wasn’t your roommate’s grunted across the room from you, the voice wasn’t Sylvie’s. This alarmed you and your head was filled with thoughts of danger. Your mind recalled all of the instructional videos you watched on self defense and you were counting on your brain to remember all the necessary steps when it came to it.

Taking a careful peek, you notice that the stranger had made themselves comfortable in Sylvie’s bed. They were facing the wall so all you could see was the back of their head. The person had dark brown hair which flowed down to the base of their neck and they had a boyish cut.

“Oh my head hurts so bad.” The stranger groaned. Recognizing her voice, you realize that Hazel was the intruder. She turns and wriggles around the bed which also helps you confirm her identity.

“Hazel!” You exclaim, trying to get her attention. She must’ve thought that she was in her dorm room. The brunette didn’t seem to register your voice and continued wriggling around the bed.

Slowly, you approach her and look at the situation fully. Alcohol reeked through her clothes and there she was in all her drunken glory sprawled all over Sylvie’s bed. Hazel Callahan, your biggest crush, was in your dorm room. The two of you were as close as neighbors could get but you’ve never been alone with each other. You weren’t sure what to do. Should you wake her up? She seemed out of it, though. You’d assumed that Hazel was the type of person you’d need to drag around back to her own room because of how hard it would be to wake her. Plus, she may not look like it, but Hazel had some serious weight on her. The memory of seeing Hazel in a tank top with her toned arms flashed in your mind and you had to physically shake the thought off before you could get any more flustered. Deciding against taking Hazel back, you took it upon yourself to gather a bottle of water and some meds (which you keep just in case) to her.

“Hazel,” You nudge her softly. This caused her to stir a little. “What are you doing here, bub? You got the wrong room.”

“What?” She replied, opening one eye and scanning the room. “Oh you’re right. This isn’t my bed.”

Hazel starts to stand and get off the bed much to your disappointment and relief. What she does next surprises you, though. The brunette then decides to plop herself down on your bed and make herself comfortable.

“This is better.” She mumbles, pulling the comforter up to her chin.

“Oh, that’s not…” You say unironically. Racking your brain on the best possible move, you ultimately decide to just let the blue eyed girl be. There was no harm in letting her sleep for the night in your bed, right?

Wrong. Hazel kept pulling you into bed with her until you lost your footing and gently crashed on top of her. Your neighbor quickly used this to her advantage and wrapped her arms around you, securing you in her hold.

“Hazel, buddy, wake up.” You whisper, trying to get yourself out of her tight (but comfortable) grip. If you had it your way, you would reciprocate the cuddle but she was drunk and she wouldn’t remember any of this in the morning.

With your free hand, you continuously poke the brunette until she got irritated and opened one of her eyes to look at you. At this, she smiled and uttered your name.

“Hi, pretty. What’re you doing in my room?” She muttered, patting your hair.

“It’s not your room, Haze.” You whisper, trying to hide the blush that was forming on your cheeks. Your body felt warm.

“‘M pretty sure it is.” She mumbled, closing her eye again. Hazel seemed comfortable like this. Like she’d imagine doing this before. It had you thinking about whether or not she thought about you too.

Ridding your head of the thoughts, you decide to give in. There was no waking your neighbor up and you were pretty tired too. Sighing, you relax your body and try to sleep all the while racking your brain on what to tell Hazel tomorrow.

You’re awoken by a groan from your intruder neighbor last night. Hazel must be awake. Taking a look, you realized that you were now facing your wall and Hazel’s arm was wrapped around you as she nuzzled her nose into your neck from behind. The thought of your position made the blood on your cheeks warm up.

“What?” You hear her mumble. Hazel rids her nose off your neck and sees that you were on the receiving end of her hug. You could feel her physically freeze at the sight. Deciding to break the ice, you faced Hazel and gave her a smile.

“Hi.” You whisper, scared that if your voice was louder you’d freak her out more.

“H-hello.” She whispered back, unsure of what her eyeballs were seeing. At that, your neighbor rubs at her eyelids to make sure you weren’t an illusion.

“You okay?” You ask as you sit up. You reach over your dresser and hand her the water bottle and meds from last night. “Here, drink this. It’ll get rid of the headache.”

Reluctantly, she sits up and takes it from you. Hazel looked lost, like she couldn’t believe what was happening in front of her eyes. Still, she took the meds and ingested it. Her head was killing her and she wasn’t going to reject being saved by an angel.

“Is this real?” She asks as she finally speaks her thoughts out loud.

This earns a giggle from you and Hazel’s heart picks up at the sight and the sound of your laughter. God, you were so pretty. Especially with you on her bed, well, it was your bed but that’s besides the point.

“I’m pretty sure it is, Haze.” You reply, fidgeting with the blanket on your bed.

“Did we?” She trails off, her eyes wide. Hazel clasps her hand over her mouth in an attempt to cover up her gasp.

“Oh, no! No, Haze. Nothing bad happened, don’t worry.” You reply, putting a reassuring hand on her lap. “You just got lost is all. Got the wrong dorm and you thought my bed was yours. You were pretty drunk.”

“Oh, alright.” She replied, seemingly disappointed. Hazel wasn’t very good at masking her emotions and you could tell that she felt bad about something.

“If it matters to you, I wasn’t mad or anything. You can stumble here drunkenly all you want.” You reassure her. The last thing you wanted was to scare your crush off because she found herself on your bed after a seemingly wild night.

“And I didn’t say anything weird?” She asked warily. Hazel didn’t trust herself whenever she was intoxicated. She didn’t have a filter whenever she drank and she was scared out of her mind that she yapped on to you about her feelings.

You shake your head at her question. “No, you’re all good. Though you did call me pretty.”

Hazel’s cheeks turned a slight shade of pink.

“It’s true.” She said. Ah, maybe she was still a bit drunk. Hazel mentally facepalmed at how she just openly admitted her admiration of you. This wasn’t how she imagined it going. In her head, Hazel confesses to you after a big life changing moment. Not this, not after drunkenly stumbling into your room.

“I think you’re pretty too, Haze.” You whisper, leaning in closer. This is it. You were going to kiss and confess your feelings. Happily ever after. The thought made your heart race.

Hazel jumps at your action; her eyes were wide with surprise. Did you read it wrong? Oh god, you just made her uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry.” You blurt out, hands wailing all over the place. “I didn’t mean to, I thought we were flirting. I’m so sorry, Hazel.”

Hazel does a double take at what you said. The wires in her brain were all flaring up and her eyebrows furrowed.

“You were flirting with me?” Hazel asks, confusion taking over her senses. She never thought that you’d be into her. Well, maybe you were. She wasn’t good at seeing signs. Sometimes it felt like you were flirting but her brain tries to push it off. She didn’t really see why you would want to be with her, to be honest. Some of the trauma from highschool carried on til this day and it’s something she has trouble with.

“I have been for the past six months, thanks for noticing.” You mutter, breaking eye contact with the brunette. All your confidence disappeared. You felt dumb for ever thinking that Hazel would feel the same about you. She didn’t even know you were flirting.

“I’m sorry.” She says as she hesitantly takes your hand. “I didn’t know. Well, a part of me did. It’s just that I’m bad at this.”

“No, Haze. I’m sorry too. I should have been direct with you, to be honest.” You interlock your fingers together and squeeze her hand.

“For what it’s worth, I do like you.” She replies. Your breath hitches and your mouth is agape ever so slightly. Hazel Callahan just confessed to you.

“Oh my god.” You exclaim, freaking out. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to return the feelings. I just wanted to let you know.” Sweet Hazel, again, wasn't reading between the lines. But you didn’t let this bother you.

Taking her face in your hands, you decide to plant a kiss on her soft lips. Your neighbor was surprised at this but eventually melted into the kiss. It was everything you dreamt of. Hazel’s lips were soft and gentle. She kissed you with such yearning, like she’d dreamt about this moment too.

“Dummy.” You say, exasperated. “I like you too.”

Hazel smiles and the dimples on her cheek peeks out. Suddenly everything was quiet in her mind and the only thing she could think of was you. The brunette took your hand and kissed it, a declaration of her love and her loyalty. She couldn’t believe it. This moment was bigger to her than anything ever before. You were the quiet in her mind and the roar of her heart.

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