never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱

I hate when mfs come in the shop and don't speak to the goats. Say hi to Coco, bitch.

- Miss Call, probably

SPILLED.

Hoooo boy. It's finally finished. This only took me eight months to paint. T.T

Disco Elysium is soooo good y'all; I feel like I'll never give it the credit it deserves.

I'm not even sure it's finished, but I'm just going to set this down now, though.

Clip studio paint and a ton of downloaded watercolor and acrylic brushes.

Let me know if you want me to pull out any closeups or anything

heart of the sea

Eurydice to Orpheus • Nov. 2023

eurydice’s silence is resounding. you can put anything in that emptiness. —@finelythreadedsky

MY FAVORITE IDIOTS ON PLANET STUPID

Hints

retired 🩶

Loser! Simon who's unaware of just how big his cock is. It's so stupidly fat, and he doesn't even know. Clueless why you're pushing your face deeper and deeper into the sheets, saying shit like "s' just the base, love". There's plenty more to go.

He's always so horny too, a monster tenting through his slacks at just the sight of you. Immediately honking your ass, whining in your ear about how much he misses your hole around him. Moments later he'll be begging to put it in, "jus' the tip" he says. But no, poor guy can't help it :( bullying his weeping cockhead against your hole, he's so clumsy that it even slips out a few times :(

He's already too far gone though, thinking with the wrong head. Panting like a dumb mutt while his hips move mindlessly. Ends up just fucking your cheeks. Shoots his load everywhere on your back n apologizes about ruining your shirt. He'll do the laundry, if you let him clean you up with his tongue, promise :(

a/n: uhhhh m'back...? Kinda?? M' still pretty busy, darlings 😭 but have this as a consultation for being dead 😢 ehehe here you go @chnets . Remember to always drink water, and eat!!

Yours, truly,

–Dolly

Giovanni Battista Gaulli (1639-1709) “The Pietà (Mary Lamenting the Dead Boop)” (1667)

König & his demonic back shots are plaguing my thoughts 😣😣

Warnings: 18+, this is pure filth so like yeah🤨 König x female reader, p in v, just a short blurb ୨୧

Cause I know damn well this man would give the FILTHIEST back shots. Like you feel like your being resurrected every time he slams you onto his cock.

“Maus- oh fuuuuck…” He groaned, drilling into you with so much force the bed shook.

You were moaning and screaming into the pillow, your backside being held up completely by him. He manhandled you on his cock like a doll, mindlessly slamming into your cunt over and over like he was trying to fuck the demons right out of his body.

He reached down and circled your waist, holding you up with just one arm. With his free hand he rubbed at your clit, always making sure you feel good no matter how pussy-drunk he is. The man is just so big—it feels like he’s everywhere. If you didn’t know any better you’d assume he was reaching all the way down to your throat. The slight pain of him slamming into your cervix overwhelmed your senses and heightened the pleasure along with the feeling of him playing with your clit. You doubted either of you were making it there after this but you could have swore you saw a flash of heavens gates every time he plunged into you.

He spread your legs wider and angled his thrusts to meet that spongey spot inside you every time his pelvis met your ass with an audible slap ! Even the sound of the headboard slamming into the wall wasn’t enough to drown out both your noises. This was definitely gonna earn you a noise complaint—tho it was worth it for the mind blowing orgasm that washed over you when that coil in your stomach finally snapped.

You came all over his cock, leaving a sticky white ring around the base of it that he couldn’t keep his eyes off of every time he slid his thick cock in and out again. With a pathetic whimper you never thought you’d hear come out of a man of his size, he pressed into you as deep as your body would let him and came hard. 

So much of his seed was stuffed inside you that it began to flow out, dripping all over both of your thighs. Before you could complain, he collapsed on top of you, crushing you with his weight. It felt like being stuck under a city bus, but you just sighed and let him have this one.

I hate correcting customers who call me ma'am and miss and honey over the phone, because only about 30 percent of the time do they apologize and start calling me sir, while 70 percent of the time they double down assuming I was trans and continue misgendering me on purpose to show how little respect they have for me as a human being. "Thank you, MISS."

I'm a cis man, for the record.

Whenever I correct someone and they keep it up, I simply refuse service. "Oh, I'm sorry, we're completeley booked up the day you wanted. Yeah, no, we're booked up on your backup dates too. Looks like our next opening isn't until, hmm, mid-November. Oh, but it doesn't have enough beds for your party. We could probably fit you in around New Years, but you'd have to change rooms every day. You might wanna try [more expensive motel] a few blocks north of us, they might have vacancies. Have a good day."

I've been able to dodge what few complaints we've gotten so far because they all tell my boss that they just spoke to a very nasty woman, and she has no idea who they're talking about. "You must have dialed the wrong number, because I'm the only woman here, and I didn't talk to you." That PISSES THEM OFF, and she doesn't understand why they respond with "well we've been staying there for years, but we're never coming back." They think she's protecting me, an afab trans man, and are disgusted by it, but from her perspective they're just crazy people who are complaining about made up bullshit; it doesn't even cross her mind that they're talking about me. Why would it?

My boss is like 70 or 75, and was a Republican until 2016. It's never come up in conversation, but something tells me she wouldn't exactly be a trans ally. I'm in a weird position here, and it's hilarious.

Listen. I’m a simple faggot. I get called pretty boy and get so horny I almost pass out

Garesh: They ask me how I manage a cross-dimensional tavern and a busy schedule.

Garesh: Truth is, I don't. I have no control over them.

Garesh: This morning Aster asked to show me something so I went to see what was going on, and then Miss Call shot me in the throat with a nerf gun.

Words cannot describe how grateful I am to witness Death Family’s journey since day one.

Huge THANK YOU to Ama and SunMin for bringing Lullah and Chay to life, you’ve changed lives to many of us you have no idea <3

Hope to see you and your new shenanigans in the future <3