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phantomphangphucker · 11 days

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Phic Phight - Ghosts And Cold Turkey Is A Bad Mix

@darthfrodophantom @datawyrms @kalifa100 @lovelyunknown @nat-space-obsessed @duchi-nesten

Jazz has a boyfriend. Jazz has a boyfriend who has NOT met her family. Jazz has a boyfriend who has not met her family and knows absolutely NOTHING about her families career path. Jazz has a boyfriend who was about to have A Bad Time. Danny, Elle, and Dan were going to make sure of that in every way remotely possible… short of world ending calamity.

Alright, so Jazz probably should have actually talked to Bassel about her family, preferably before he had decided that he absolutely had to finally met her family. It was spring break so she couldn’t exactly push it off till later, or long enough to explain anything really, so he was officially going in ‘cold turkey’. Had she mentioned that her family was weird? Of course, that was unavoidable. But she’s fairly certain he thought that ‘weird’ meant being really into fishing or made crochet baby dolls, not everything ghosts. And now that they’re on the road she’s fairly certain that telling the driver that ghosts are ‘the family business’ is a bad idea; it would not be good if he were to drive off of the road in shock.

Bassel chuckling, “so am I going to get regaled with stories about weird birds they’ve seen bird watching or the last obscure B list bird horror flic?”.

Jazz laughing awkwardly, “you have not idea. No idea at all…”.

Unfortunately Jazz was unaware of one simple fact, it wasn’t just her and her plus one who was coming to visit for the break….

Jack beams as a clawed hand crams itself through the seam in the Fenton Ghost Portal™, turning his head to the stairs, “Danny! Your kid’s are here!”.

“AWESOME! WE’RE MAKING COOKIES TO PACIFY THE GREMLIN! SEND ‘EM UP!”.

Sweet! Cookies! Yum. Jack turning back to the portal as the doors slam open loudly and threateningly, Jack chuckling to himself, that man was always such a drama queen. Watching the tall full ghost step through the now open portal, a little sister sitting perched on his shoulders. The little missy waving wildly at her grandpa, “hiyya gramps!”.

The flaming-haired full ghost scoffing, “Yeah yeah, whatever”.

Jack grinning and jumping up, moving to hug the two, the elder of the two stiffening and just ‘putting up with’ the hugging, “glad you kiddos could make it!”, ruffling the littler one’s hair, “there’s cookies”.

“Hell yeah!”, and she’s off like a rocket, flying up the stairs.

Jack eyes the full ghost, “beat any other ghosts down lately?”.

The man snorts, “obviously. Not that any of them were much of a fight”, grinning meanly, all fang, “the gorffens were deliciously squishie though”. Jack laughing as the two large men head upstairs.

Danny’s grinning his head off watching Elle devouring at least fifth-teen ghost-shaped cookies. Waving at Dan as he comes up behind Jack, “there’s pure ecto-cookies too, Mr. Can’t Eat Mortal Realm Food”. The full ghost scowls and flips him off but absolutely takes a couple of the overly green person-shaped cookies. Ha. The human cookies were ghost shaped and the ghost cookies were human shaped.

“Whatever, mom”.

Danny absolutely scowls at that, chucking a cookie at the ghost. While Maddie hums, eyeing them all, “Jazz will be coming by too”.

“Oh? When?”

“Any moment now, I believe”.

“I am in pj’s!”.

Dan snorts, “you look like a dumbass no matter what you’re wearing”. That gets him immediately blasted in the face with a small ecto-beam, the ghost only grinning viscously in response; Danny zipping up through the ceiling to get changed. Mom seriously couldn’t have told him sooner? Gosh! He had a new ugly ass sweater with a stupid ghost joke on it to show off!

The knots in Jazz’s stomach could kill her if they became ghosts right about now, as Bassel pulls them up into her drive way. He nearly rams into the house actually, having been staring at the ops centre on the roof, “uh, okay, spaceship on the roof is slightly more out there than I was expecting?”, looking to her, “and do they run their business from their house? Hence the sign?”.

Jazz laughs awkwardly, “they have permits for it… that they got after building it”.

He shrugs, “I can admire the guts”, and patting her on the shoulder, “and stop being so nervous, I’m a great guy! I’m sure they’ll love me. Plus you’ve said they’re pretty easy to please”.

“Oh I’m not worried about their reaction to you, rather your reaction to them. I have mentioned they’re weird right? And that my dad’s taller than ninety-one percent of the human population?”.

“… you did not mention the height, damn that’s impressive, he’s the one with the personality of a puppy, right?”.

She gives him a supportive back pat before they get out and head to the front door, “yes, and thank everything for that. His hugs are crushing though”.

“I bet”.

The door pops open without her having to knock, meaning Danny’s up, “sup Jazz and- oh shit, you brought company. Fuck. Two seconds”, and slams the door in her face.

Bassel quirking an eyebrow, “what? Is he still in pj’s or something? That was a really ugly sweater. Pink? and green? Together? Ew”, chuckling a little, “and did it say ‘boo’ onto others as you would have others ‘boo’ unto you? Why was there an image of a ghost aggressively holding out a loaf of garlic bread?”.

She snorts, even if she’s honestly confused, “oh no, he always makes sure to wear something really unpleasant to look at when he knows I’m visiting. I believe it’s born from a sick, though harmless, degree of sadism”, frowning, “though I’m not sure why he just rudely slammed the door in our faces”.

And then she hears the cackle, the loud deep malicious cackle, officially realising that she… might have fucked up. Just a little bit. Sighing and facepalming, “oh no”. The couple standing there as seemingly a shouting match goes on inside.

“GET CHANGED YOU DIPSHIT!”

“YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! MOM!”.

“I WILL END YOU!”.

“GO AHEAD AND TRY!”.

“Are they gonna want these cookies or?”.

“DON’T YOU DARE! Yes, gumdrop, leave them some. HEY DROP THAT! DROP THAT NOW!”… “EW!”.

“HA!”.

“DAN!-”.

Then the door jerks open very aggressively, and Jazz and Bassel stare up at the giant of a man with too sharp eyes and a feral unkind grin, “so you bagged someone, eh? Need someone to beat him through the wringer?”, and moves to grab Bassel’s arm; who thankfully has the common sense to pull away while staring almost disturbed at the man.

Jazz grabbing Dan’s wrist and holding him, glaring at the semi-reformed mass murderer/genocidal, parricidal, infanticidal, amicicidal, omnicidal, deicidal, ecocidal, mundicidal, psychopath. “Don’t even think about, Dan”.

“Aw but Jazzy-”.

She points a finger in his face, “no. Bad. No trying to physically fight my boyfriend”.

Then Dan’s head gets yanked back, Danny grasping the man’s ponytail, “get back in here, you shit”. The door closing again.

Jazz turns and winces at Bassel’s freaked out expression, “alright so, I didn’t know Dan was going to be here. I would have absolutely said no, if I’d known that”.

“Should I be worried?”; he looked extremely worried.

Jazz grimacing, “he’s… on parole, for, well, for murder so, yes”, grabbing Bassel’s wrist, “well we’re here now, just, don’t go anywhere with him alone. He’s also a prankster”.

Bassel almost squawking, “Murder?!?!”, as she drags him through the threshold into the Fenton household.

They get smacked with the noise immediately, she still doesn’t get how her parents managed to make a semi-sound barrier for inside the house that worked even when doors or windows were open… even if it didn’t always work well with ghosts or half ghosts. Danny is ramming cookies into Dan’s face while standing on his shoulders and snarling, Dan attempting to yank him off. Elle is bouncing around on all fours playing with cujo, who’s vibrating with excitement literally. Dad is laughing, head on the table, and slamming a fist on it repeatedly; a chair falls over. And Mom’s set the stove on fire and is smacking it leisurely with that fire-proof ghost net; the Fenton Flamo-Containo she thinks.

Jazz rolling up her sleeves, sighing, and moving over to her mom, “what did you burn, mom?”; and starts properly smothering the flames… the flames have faces and eyeballs.

This was a mistake. This entire trip was a mistake. Her poor boyfriend.

Bassel blinks, gives himself a fortifying shake, and swallows, “hi? Um, I’m Bassel?”.

The smallest one is on him in a second, it’s freaky. Her chirping up at him, “why did you say that like a question? Are you a question? If I question you will you become a sentient question mark?”.

What? Her eyes are way too big and her skin is smooth. It’s… very strange. Then she’s being picked up by the smaller boy- the teenager, that he didn’t even hear approach. “Elle-”. That was strangely chastising to hear from a teen. “-no giving people existential crises”.

“Are question edible?”.

The teen quirks an eyebrow, “I mean probably? if you write them on a piece of paper?”.

“If I write them on apples and pelt doctors with them do you think they’ll anwser my questions without poking me?”

“Eh fuck it, give it a go. Tell me if it works”. Then the teen looks up to Bassel, “sup, I’m Danny, the little brother”.

Bassel nods awkwardly, this kid… was seriously off. His skin was too smooth too, eyes not right and dangerous, his hair seemed… darker than black. The hell is he looking at? “Uh. Bassel? I already said that though. Um, I’m guessing the girls the youngest sibling?”.

She pops out around Danny’s leg, “I’m the granddaughter actually”. Danny snorting, “grand-gremlin is more like it”. She bites the teen… does she have fangs???

Bassel blinks harshly, pointing at the… murderer, “his kid? I take it?”. And now that he’s looking, what the hell is up with how similar they all look???

Dan barks out a laugh, shaking his face off like a dog so hard pieces of green? cookie physically stab into the walls and cupboards, “that shit stain is moms kid, not mine! Holy shit!”.

Danny snapping his head to Dan and pointing aggressively at him, “you”, shrugging and changing tones so fast Bassel nearly gets whiplash, “would have absolute nightmare kids and I would cry if your dumbass is the one to make a grandpa of me. Fuck you”.

Bassel is… very confused.

Mrs. Fenton shouting, “and I don’t want to be a great-grandma! Thank you very much!”, and coming over, Jazz looking to be scowling down at the stove, “hello, I’m doctor Maddie Fenton, feel free to just call me Maddie though”, swatting him on the arm, “none of that Mrs. or Dr. stuff”.

Danny pouting at her, “hey, why does Val still have to call you Mrs then?”.

“Because you two are still teens mister”.

The teen only pouts more…. His eyes look far too glass-like, like he’s a doll. Bassel kind of wants to be no where near him. Eyeing Jazz’s mom, the… hazmat is extremely concerning, maybe he should have asked more about what her parents did for a living? or their hobbies? “You have a doctorate?”.

The woman grinning, “that’s right! Primarily in ecto-ology and clinical laboratory science. but also criminology and medical science. My husband, Jack has doctorates in ecto-ology and clinical laboratory science as well, public health, chemistry, and practical theology”, turning away to eye Jazz, “the Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”.

“For the millionth time, mom, I’m still not studying ecto-ology; spectral psychology is completely different and that isn’t even my primary field of study”.

Bassel blinks, okay he knew she said her parents were smart but damn. But… ecto-ology? Really? A pseudoscience? Taking that in conjunction with practical theology made some sense, many religions believed in sprits after all, but with medical degrees? With actual scientific degrees? He’d thought Jazz’s spectral psych was a bit odd, especially with the rumours she talked to ghosts which he brushed off, but at least it made sense since she wanted to be a therapist. Many people can use religion and the belief in spirits to help heal after all. “Ecto-ology huh? As your primary? Interesting choice”.

Then Jazz’s dad is on him in an instant, not inhumanely like Danny had been but to see someone so massive move so fast was jarring, “oh! Did Jazzypants not tell you!”, slapping a hand to his chest proudly, “the Fenton’s are a family of ghost hunters!”.

What.

Maddie eyes her daughter, “Jazz”. While Dan out right cackles evilly and Danny wheezes, hands on his knees, “Jazz you dumbass!”.

Bassel blinks harshly, “ghost… hunters?”, o-kay that was… a lot weirder than he expected. Her parents believed… in ghosts and claimed to ‘hunt’ them. No wonder his girlfriend wanted to study psychology, her parents were delusional.

Jazz can tell that her boyfriend absolutely thinks her parents are insane now. Danny eyeing the guy before wheezing more tells her he’s noticed too, walking over to her and patting her on the arm, “he doesn’t believe in ghosts, does he”.

She sighs, “I… don’t think so”.

“HA!”. Oh Dan was just eating this up.

Elle running over with cujo, holding the pup up at Bassel’s face, he looks like he barely resists recoiling, “pet the ghost pup and believe”.

“Why is he green?”.

“Because he’s dead! Dummy!”.

“What”. Then cujo is in his arms, his face is horrified, but he does cautiously pat cujo’s belly. Him stiffening and staring as the dog floats up and starts walking on the ceiling; Elle giggling.

Danny slinking over to the guy while Maddie tries to swat the dog off the ceiling, “yeah, welcome to Amity, famously the most haunted city in the world. And yes, your girlfriend’s parents are the leading ghost scientist of the entire world and sell ghost weapons to the government and general public”, doing jazz hands, “surprise!”.

Bassel hasn’t even made it past the entry way, Jazz feels like an ass for letting him go into this blind. Her shoving Danny away, “don’t be mean”, eyeing Bassel, who’s wide-eyed, “yeah sorry? I did tell you they were weird”.

Bassel eyes Dan standing on the table to pin a fucking green floating dog to the ceiling. Maddie’s holding a strange taser, that has green electricity, threatening the dog; Danny’s dangling off of her arm shrieking about leaving his pup alone and how if anyone’s going to get tased it should be him. Looking back to Jazz, “by weird you mean insane? I’d question the ghosts thing but there’s a floating green dog on the ceiling. Hell, I’m almost questioning my own sanity”.

Jack laughs, rubbing his neck, “oh yeah! We get that a lot! But hey! People stop calling you crazy once they get attacked by a talking five foot tall hornet or a town gets sucked into another dimension!”.

Jazz huffing, “you guys just will not let me live down that stupid hornet, will you”.

Danny shouting, “technically it was a shapeshifting old man! Not a hornet!”, as he runs out of the room with cujo in tow.

Maddie following with the taser, “Danny! he needs to be punished when he does that!”.

“No! Never! Kiss my dead ass!”.

Bassel blinking, “your… brother swears a lot, and wait did he claim to be Dan’s mom? What? I’m sitting down”.

Jazz wincing, “don’t sit on the orange chair, it screams sometimes”. He squeaks an ‘okay’ and sits on the purple couch rubbing his temples; Jazz plopping down beside him.

Dan shouting, “Is anyone gonna eat the ecto-wienies!?!”, from the kitchen.

Jazz scowling to herself before shouting back, “Dan don’t! I dont want Bassel passing out!”.

“That’s the point!”.

She throws her hands up dramatically in fur-station, at least her dad rushes off to stop Dan from consuming screaming hot dogs while their guest adjusts to his new reality.

Bassel groaning, “and why would I pass out?”.

… “They scream too. It’s… pretty freaky to see someone eating squirming screaming hotdogs if you’re not prepared for it”.

“And why do your parents have hotdogs that do that and how even?”.

Jazz shakes her head, “they might have studied clinical laboratory science but they absolutely do not practice good lab safety or sample safety. Things get contaminated accidentally a lot”.

“And that… makes hotdogs able to move and scream?”.

“That about sums it up, yeah”.

“What the actual fuck, babe”.

Then Dan pops over, arms crossed, “thanks Jazz, now gramps has confiscated all my food”.

Jazz pointing at him as he flops down on the same couch as them hard enough to make the couch bounce, “good and could you sit down any harder?”.

“I was aiming to knock you two love birds off”.

“Zone you are such a jerk”.

“I aim to displease”.

Bassel makes an aggressive motion with his hands, not looking at either of them, “okay what the fuck. First how did that not break the couch? Two how is a teen boy mom? And what is wrong with this town and house?”.

Dan snorts and Jazz knows she’s going to hate what comes out his mouth, him eyeing her, “should I tell him there’s a portal to the afterlife in the basement, or should you?”. She slaps him immediately, wincing from the definite sprained wrist she just gave herself; stupid full ghost jerk. He sticks his tongue out at her and she wants to slap him again; at least his tongue isn't forked at the moment.

Jack pops back in carrying Elle by the waist, her arms and legs dangling down as she giggles, “you good, Jazzy?”.

Dan chuckling, “no. She regrets not warning a certain someone”, putting a hand to his chest, “I fully support that fucking chaotic choice”.

Jazz scowling, “you just enjoy seeing people suffer”.

“Hey, if I’m not allowed to kill folks anymore I gotta get my kicks somewhere? Or would you rather I start skinning animals and leaving their flesh hanging from trees?”. Dan gets bashed off the couch by a baseball bat wielding Danny. “Ow! Seriously mom?”.

“Threaten to skin animals for the lols again and I’ll sic Sam on you”.

Dan puts his hands up, “I’ll pass, you kill joy”.

“Good”.

Bassel gags and makes a face at Jazz, gesturing his hands at Dan as Danny smacks him with the baseball bat again, “what”.

“He’s… got a twisted sense of humour?”.

“Not that!”, Bassel shaking his head, “well yes that, what is wrong with that man. But I mean the mom thing?”.

Jazz eyeballs the full ghost, “Dan’s a tough subject, let’s just say a lot of really nasty things happened to him and at least one psychotic break. And he calls Danny ‘mom’ mostly to annoy him”.

“Oh that’s a lot less weird-”.

“Danny kinda is his mom though”.

Basel groans.

Elle pops her head over the couch, somehow escaping Jack’s grasp, “Danny’s uncle is a mad scientist who has no issue dabbling in super evil human experimentation, Dan and me were tots made from Danny via fucked up science and suffering! Hooray for causing mass confusion!”.

Bassel glancing from the small girl to his girlfriend, “seriously?”.

Jazz sighing, “yeah, sorry. Technically that man’s mine and Danny’s god father, not uncle, but Danny likes to bug the man. Vlad… needs so much therapy”.

Danny shouting, “at least he’s got a cat now! Even if he did name her after mom”; while Dan snags the baseball bat and pops Danny on the head with it. Danny bites the baseball bat.

Bassel shakes his head, “so you weren’t kidding about being somewhat related to one of the richest men on the planet, and he’s basically a crazy super villain; great”.

Jack rubs his neck, “unfortunately yeah, I kinda blew up a proto-portal in his face and he didn’t take that well”.

Jazz puts her hands on her hips, leaning forwards a little, “dad, you guys didn’t visit him in hospital even once, for seven years. Of course he didn’t take that well”.

Danny popping out from behind Jack, “he still complains about that, by the by. I dumped get well soon cards on him last time he was whining about it. Asked him if that made up for it, he shouted no and shot me in the foot”.

Jazz shaking her head, “I still don’t get how you two ever get along”.

“Hey, arch enemies gotta have some bonding time sometimes. Plus, he’s got the good liquor and will absolutely try to bribe me with expensive gifts”.

“And I keep telling you that’s unhealthy and you’re only encouraging him”.

Dan chuckling, “let him, who knows, maybe I’ll get another gremlin sibling”.

Basically everyone, even Bassel, shouting, “NO!”.

Maddie getting back towards the kitchen, and bring out what remains of the ghost-shaped cookies, “cookie?”, offering them to Bassel.

… “are they going to start screaming?”.

Maddie blushing immediately, Jazz covering her mouth and laughing, “no. No. Only things that were once alive tend to do that. Baked goods are fine”, eyeing the cookies, “and they’re not green so they’re safe for human consumption”.

He takes a cookie and munches it very cautiously, “and the green ones?”.

Jazz grimacing, “definitely not safe for human consumption”.

Elle nodding, still behind the couch, “those are for us Phantom’s”. Meaning that now Jazz knows Bassel’s basically going to have to deal with finding out her brother and said brothers kids are all varying degrees of dead.

Bassel eyeing the small child, “do I even want to know?”.

Elle gives a cheery, “nope!”.

Oh okay, maybe her, and thusly Bassel, can dodge that whole situation. Jazz absolutely glares daggers at Dan to say nothing. The man grins evilly but remains silent, thank zone for that.

Bassel taking a breath and slapping his legs before standing up, “okay. Alright. You lot are stranger than I expected but I really like Jazz so I’ll deal”.

Maddie looks relieved but Jack booms, “awesome! You seem like a good guy!”, and smacks Bassel so hard on the back that he gets smacked into the floor and knocked out. Dan’s bending over wheeze laughing, Elle’s floated up into the air curled up and laughing, Danny’s run over to try and help the man while also laughing, and Jazz is shaking a finger at her dad angrily.

Maddie sighs, face in a hand, “Jack”; while Danny’s hoisting Bassel up and back onto the couch, smacking his cheeks to get him to come ‘round.

When Bassel comes to he nearly screams, that Danny boy’s face is inches from his own and he’s crouched on Bassel’s chest. How much did this kid weigh??? And damn were his eyes still extremely creepy. At least he’s clued in what was wrong with him, he was uncanny, like he wasn’t quite human but close enough that it was very wrong in that base instinctual way. The teen grins, it’s like his teeth don’t fit in his mouth and the smile is just a hair too wide. “Cool, you’re awake. Was starting to wonder. Dad smacked you into the floor by accident, if you don’t brace yourself when he goes in for back pats then you’ll wind up on the floor”, titling his head owlishly, “lesson learned?”.

Bassel nodding at the kid that hasn’t moved his face out of Bassel’s, “um, yeah?”, frowning, “your guy’s dad is freakishly strong, you know that?”. The boy just shrugs before hopping off Bassel’s chest, letting him sit up and rub his head a little. “Do your parents always wear the hazmats?”.

Danny chuckles, “yup, and they will still claim they are stylish”, rolling his wrist, “they try to get me and Jazz in ‘em all the time. But hey, I’ll stick to wearing that kinda bullshit when I’m dead”.

Jazz’s head pops out of the kitchen entryway, “oh good, you’re up. You up for pie? There’s eight for some reason”.

“Are… they all the same kind?”.

“Sadly, yes”.

Even he can admit that was sad, variety was nice. But Danny pouts at her, “hey, I’m not about to discourage my personal wannabe poacher just because he doesn’t have a single creative bone in his entire metal mecha suit”. What the hell was any of that supposed to mean? This kid was probably one of the most confusing people Bassel’s ever met, Elle being a close second.

“You could at least try to convince him to try lime cream instead of him shoving lemon cream at you three times a year”.

Bassel holds up a hand, “how old are these pies?”. His girlfriend blinks like that hadn’t even crossed her mind… she might be too used to this level of strange perhaps.

Danny waving him off, “oh I helped him find a solid anniversary gift for his girlfriend, which fine was extremely explosive but eh, so he went a little pie happy. They’re two days old”.

“Oh alright, I’ll have some then”; two days wasn’t even weird. That many pies was odd and how he got them was bizarre, but not as bad as a dog walking on the ceiling or Dan-the-psycho talking about skinning animals like it was funny. Him and Danny joining everyone in the kitchen proper finally. The stove is charred from top to bottom, fires were clearly common. The fridge… was glowing? The toaster looks like it’s definitely some kind of project and not safe to use at all. The table is clean at least, besides the cookie crumbs and excessive amount of pies.

Said pie is extremely good, like professional good. Bassel blinking at it, “damn that’s good”.

Danny chirping, like actually chirping, “I know right?”; how does a human mouth make that sound???

“Then why isn’t… Dan eating any?”; maybe evil or not…

Dan flips Bassel off, grabs a slice and proceeds to hurl it at him; Bassel barely ducking in time while Jazz, Maddie, and Danny all shout, ‘NO!’. Elle is giggling though and Bassel would bet money that’s encouraging the man. Danny smashes an entire pie right in Dan’s face in retaliation, Elle smashing a slice on Danny’s head; it just devolves into a full on pie food fight from there.

Jazz crouch walking to avoid splatter while Maddie shoos the three outside with a broom, Jack following while shouting about getting the hose. Jazz putting a hand on his arm, “you good”.

“What twenty something starts a food fight!”, shaking his head, “better than throwing a knife at me I guess”.

“He usually only throws knives at Danny”.

She said that like it was normal! And not at all disturbing or something to be worried about! “He actually throws knives at people!”.

She winces like she just now realised that wasn’t okay, “right. Don’t worry about it, he might make a lot of threats or do threatening stuff but he’s heavily against going back into solitary confinement”, her huffing, “which I still think was cruel, deprivation chambers are one hundred percent a form of torture and no one deserves that”.

“What kind of jail has a freaking deprivation chamber, oh my god”. No wonder that man seemed like he had the socialization skills of a very threatening murderous brick wall.

The two stand up and they can see the three ‘Phantom’s -he’s still confused on that one but too scared to ask- getting hosed off in the front yard by Maddie; Jack’s helping by physically holding Dan up in the air and laughing. What??? Bassel blinks, “no one should be able to lift that beast of a man up like that”.

And then there’s an explosion, Bassel jerking around and Jazz just turning causally to watch purple smoke leak out from what’s labeled as a lab door. Her grabbing him with a quick, “nope”, and dragging him outside.

“What was that?”.

“Don’t know, but I’m not taking the chance that whatever their latest project is is noxious”, then shouting at her mom, “mom! Something blew up in the lab and it’s leaking purple gas!”.

Bassel very strictly remembers her not long ago mentioning that her parents weren’t big on lab safety, noxious though? These people were completely nuts. His nice, level headed, kind, smart, cautious Jazz came from this??? Yes she could be a little neurotic, especially about food and sharps saftey which he absolutely understood now, and she was a little… spooky sometimes. But still! He still didn’t believe her hair was really that orange without her dying it, even if he’d never seen proof of her doing so. And she always had on some black tourmaline or turquoise that she claimed was ‘protection’, he just thought she was being a little spiritual, now it seemed more like this ghost thing.

Danny shakes his wet hair off like a feral dog, “that’s probably my lunch!”.

Jazz throwing her hands up, “why is it leaking purple gas!”. Bassel muttering, “I think it exploding is more concerning than that”. Jazz shaking her head at him, “Danny’s favourite local restaurant has highly explosive trade marked sauce”.

“What!?!”. How was that even legal?

Danny pointing a finger at Jazz’s face as he moves to head inside to… ‘rescue’ his food, “hey, you haven’t had real food till you’ve had a Mighty Meaty Mega Nasty Melt and Phantomized Fries”, shrugging, “and I was trying to make blackened ecto-wine infused bread, for sandwiches”.

Jazz makes a face at the boys retreating back, “ew”.

Bassel blinking, “did, did this restaurant really name a menu item ‘Nasty Melt’?”. He’s revising his previous opinion, this entire town was nuts; not just these people.

Elle, very wet, bounds over, “yup! It’s called the Nasty Burger, used to be Tasty burger but someone vandalized it and there was a vote to just keep the N”, grinning, “I think it’s funny, the sauce is to die for”.

Jazz cringing, “oh no not the death jokes, at least spare my boyfriend those, ugh”. The little girl sticks her tongue out and pouts a little before running back inside at the pies. Jazz going wide-eyed and following with a shout, “oh no you better not! Mom just got you cleaned up! You put that pie down missy!”.

Bassel cautiously sticking his head in, cautious of both fumes and pie, to stare at his girlfriend holding a literal child at gun point while the child menacingly holds a pie over her own head. “um, why are you threatening a child with a gun”.

She brushes him off like this isn’t messed up, “it’s fine, there’s no normal guns in this household”. What does that even mean? Ghost guns? Is that what this is? Is that why it’s slightly glowing green!

Then Dan scares the crap out of him, speaking up from directly behind him, “I wouldn’t worry about it, she’s a terrible shot anyway. She could put a gun directly against someone’s temple and still hit a cars side mirror instead”.

“I’ve gotten better!”.

“No you have not, you managed to shoot a fire hydrant and set it on fire last time; I was impressed”.

“Shut up, Dan”.

“No I don’t think I will”.

At least Danny, who somehow got behind Elle, takes the pie from the girl and wags a finger at her, “repeat chaos isn’t chaos, it’s a pattern”.

“What if I cut off one of my hands, put it in the pie, then smack her with it? Then it would be a pie high five, not a food fight”.

Danny blinks, “I’m stealing that idea for the next time the Lunch Lady throws flaming stoves at me”.

Bassel… Bassel is not questioning that. “Kid, your mind must be a very strange place”. Sure little kids always said odd stuff, things adults wouldn’t even dream of, but this was a special brand of odd.

Dan shoving his way past Bassel, nearly knocking the guy over and giving him some major hebejebes, to go pat Elle on the head in amusement. Maddie steadying him, “you okay? And at least she’s not as bad as Danny used to be”, crossing her arms and shaking her head, “he thought blackbird pie meant to actually find birds and bake a pie with them. It was incredibly disgusting, especially because he didn’t know how to use an oven yet so he maxed out its temp for three hours”.

Oh okay, so Danny was just like that too. What was that about apples and trees? “That… probably could have gone even worse”. The teen, then kid, could have burned the house down!

The woman grumbled, “at least he’s never sucked the house into the mirror dimension, unlike someone”, as she heads in to help Jazz, Danny, Dan, and Elle actually clean up the pie mess. Jack shouting, “I said I was sorry about that!”. Danny shouting back, “at least no one’s pulled a Technus and walked the house into the ocean!”; while Bassel is wondering how the heck the eldest Fenton heard his wife’s grumbling from the other side of the yard.

There was something seriously physically off with all these people. Including Jazz. He’s feeling very distinctly reminded of a lot of things he’s just sort of brushed off or thought nothing of about her before. He used to think a lot about how vibrant her eyes were, or that her teeth were a touch sharp; nothing like the ‘Phantom’s but still. She was amazing at lock picking and could handle ‘practice’ patients others couldn’t; even if she would also ‘force’ therapy on random people sometimes. And eyeing her parents, they’re the same. Intense eyes, oddly pale almost glassy skin, teeth that feel like they’re sharp but aren’t; it’s not uncanny the way those three ‘Phantom’s were, but it’s still odd.

Dan was the worst though, easily, when the man brushed past him it felt like being cornered by massive wolf or mountain lion. If Bassel had ran into that man randomly on the street there’s no way he’d think he was anything close to human. Danny and Elle at least seemed humanish, almost human; Dan just seemed like he was playing pretend.

Bassel shakes himself off before stepping back into the chaotic Fenton household, “am I going to get pie thrown at me again?”.

Danny looks at him, “nope”, then glares at Elle, “or someone’s losing her Switch privileges”; the girl gasps in horror.

See that? That was normal. Normal punishment, normal reaction to a punishment. Perfectly normal. … Then the girl threatens to ‘liquify herself in protest’; goodbye normal, it was nice while it lasted. Either way he moves to help clean up pie a little, speaking back up, “so your bread fine?”.

“It ate itself and imploded, so no”. What. The boy grins cheerily, right too many teeth, “which means it must have tasted good, meaning I’m on to something”.

“I? Guess?”. He’s honestly just trying not to stare at the teens teeth.

…

They somehow do actually make it to the living room to watch a movie. It actually is a weird B list bird horror flic, which feels too normal now and that frankly concerns him. He’s not sure he wants the get used to this level of insanity. He loves Jazz but he is fully intending to potentially never step foot in this building again after this. How was he going to survive here for a week??? Blinking, oh right, elbowing Jazz and whispering, “hey, all the luggage is still in the car right?”. Then Dan scares the crap outta him again, “don’t bother whispering, I can still hear you”. Jazz grabs a random round thing from the floor to smack the man with for that.

Jazz leaning against Bassel again, “the longer we leave it in the car the longer it’ll take to get contaminated or destroyed, I told you not to bring your expensive computer ‘just in case you had time’ for a reason”.

Considering the amount of mess and literal exploding/imploding -again, what???- bread, he could understand that sentiment; oh and the actual guns apparently just lying around. He is very glad he listened to her, that laptop was never setting an inch of its metal casing in this building. He winces, “yeah, thanks for that”. She pats him fondly.

Danny straightens out so fast that it aggressively startles Bassel. “Oh! Think I should invite Val?”, eyeing Jazz smugly, “since someone brought their little lover”.

Jazz scowls at him, “Danny, I think Basel having to put up with my very weird family including the two weirdest members, is more than enough without adding in your trigger happy girlfriend with serious anger management issues. Especially because I know for a fact she won’t agree to leave all her weapons at home”.

Danny looks offended, putting a hand to his chest and paying no mind to the bird-related massacre happening on screen, “I’ll have you know she doesn’t even sleep unarmed, she hasn’t been unarmed since she was fourteen”.

“Exactly”.

You know what? Bassel thinks that actually makes sense. Danny was too strange to date someone remotely normal. “I’m not even surprised, you’re a little too freaky to date someone who’s just, you know, an average person. So sure, date an aspiring cop or whatever”.

Danny snaps and finger guns at him, “think more like nanobot powered teenage ghost hunter with a jet sled”.

What. Bassel blinking, “so somehow you’re the more normal one in the relationship. This girl’s in therapy right”. Jazz actually laughs at that.

Danny screws up his face, “Ancients you sound like Jazz”, looking at her, “he sounds like you”, looking back to Bassel, “and eh, my personality has more sparkles and explosions”, tilting his head, “besides, how am I freaky, besides the gremlin energy and general chaos anyways”.

Dan snorting, “and the fact that you think dumpster chic is a good thing”.

“As if you don’t wear the same”.

“Excuse you, I lift all my clothing off of the finest of corpses”.

Bassel, and Danny for that matter, gag; Danny’s seems more mock dramatic gag though. Bassel shaking his head, “add in the fact that if someone told me you were actually a doll pretending to be human, I’d believe them”.

That gets him multiple odd looks, including from Jazz. No one bothers to pause the movie even though everyone’s attention is now on him as she quirks an eyebrow at him, “what do you mean by that? Sure my little brother can move too quietly or too quickly, and his still too skinny and pale, but I wouldn’t call him possibly inhuman looking”.

Danny points at his face, “I’m pretty sure if I looked legit freaky Dash would mock me relentlessly for it”.

Bassel is baffled, are these people just… used to him so much they don’t notice? And Dan’s just looking to the side snickering meanly, Bassel almost gets the feeling the man knows what he’s talking about. Bassel looking at each of them, “you’re telling me you guys don’t notice his skin looks like weirdly glassy play dough? Or his eyes are too big? That his teeth don’t fit in his face? He’s weighs less than a bag of potatoes!”. They all look very confused and turn to stare at Danny, who shrinks down a little awkwardly; Dan’s laughing is full on guffaws now, head tilted over the back of the chair that apparently sometimes screams. When Elle points at her own face and grins too wide, Bassel nods, “yes, you too. Less than, your uh, dad but still”, gesturing at everyone, “honestly all of you have hair that’s too strongly coloured, overly vibrant eyes, and no skin texture”, scratching his head, “I thought my girl just had a spot on skin care routine and impressive hair colouring technique that she refused to share”. Jazz fiddles with her orange hair a little, making him feel a little guilty. Bassel coughing, “not that I dislike that”. Dan barks out another loud laugh.

Jazz eventually hurling another random Bassel doesn’t know what at the man, “stop laughing! Us looking weird to normal people isn’t funny! You jerk!”.

Oh okay. So they don’t know. That was weird? Does no one in town comment on it? Does no one even notice it? Was everyone in this town that strange??? Or was everyone in town strange looking themselves?

Dan huffing another laugh, “oh it very much is! Especially because I already knew and did in fact tell you morons”, waving a hand around leisurely, “not my fault you shits thought I was just being an ass”. Bassel guesses it makes sense that the strangest and most startling looking -and feeling, frankly- one would be the one to notice.

Danny looks offended, “and how do you know this? The fuck Dan”.

The man scowls meanly, it’s very mocking, “oh I don’t know, maybe because I spent ten years travelling the globe randomly killing people? Maybe that’s it? I’m the only fucker here who’s done enough travelling to tell people find this face”, gesturing at his face and smirking, “alarming, and not just because I was usually either threatening to kill or trying to kill them”.

“What? you walked around with that face?”.

“Eh I got bored of the other one sometimes”.

Bassel is choosing to ignore part of this conversation, otherwise he’s not going to get over his girlfriend being related to what’s sounds like more ‘mass murderer’ than ‘single murderer’. Not to mention that he doesn’t want to know what is meant by the murderer having different ‘faces’. He doesn’t want to know if this man’s a real life leather face.

Elle pouts, “I travel a lot, no one tells me I look weird?”.

“Sis, you’re a kid, all little brats look fucking weird”.

The little girl giggles, earning a fond but very quick look from the large man. At least it seemed like he actually liked his family maybe.

Danny gestures at nothing and scowls at Dan, “Dan, you’re a six foot eleven wall of muscle with a face that’s default setting is evil smirk, of course people think you look scary!”.

“Oh people found me disturbing when I was wearing your skin too, mom”.

“Fuck you”.

Bassel forces himself not to ask how that’s even possible. ‘Wearing the skin’ of someone who still has their skin is impossible and not to mention the size difference, it wouldn’t fit; why is he even thinking about the logistics of this?!? Ew!

Jack scratches his head, “while I can’t say I see, I doubt you’re making stuff up”, looking at Maddie, “all the ecto you think?”.

The mother nods to herself, tapping her chin, “there’s not much else it could be, especially if our oddness is merely tamer versions of Danny’s and the grandkids”.

Bassel is lost, looking to Jazz and quirking an eyebrow. She cringes, “Danny has a very intense version of ecto-contamination”. She says that like it’s not extremely weird and concerning.

Danny chuckling, “if by that you mean I’m fucking half dead then yeah”.

Jazz swats him, “Danny! For zones sake!”.

“Hey!”, Danny sticks his arms out nearly smacking multiple people, “if I’m that freaky looking then there really isn’t a point, Jazz!”.

“I hate that you’re right!”, Jazz huffing while Bassel is officially realising that everyone just shouts at each other in this house, regardless of if they’re happy or mad or excited. Her turning to him, “my brother’s a bit dead”.

Bassel absolutely squawks at that, “what”. And then suddenly the kid’s glowing and his eyes are green, the actual hell? Elle leaning forward, sticking her tongue out and pointing at her face, also with green eyes and glowing. Bassel cautiously and slowly eyeing Dan, his eyes flash blood red and yup, glowing.

Okay. Alright. He’s in a room full of glowing people, what is he supposed to do with this? He officially thinks that anyone who has ever found out someone else wasn’t quite human in a movie was way too damn calm about it!

Jazz winces a little, she can tell her boyfriend has absolutely no idea how to react to his girlfriend's glowing family members, so she pats his shoulder, “is it weird? Yes. Am I glad my brother is only partially dead? Absolutely. Don’t worry about it?”.

He blinks owlishly at her, clearly freaked out, “it’s kinda hard not to worry about my sister having dead family members kicking around and her whole family including her being contaminated by ghost stuff enough to alter their appearances”.

Then Danny goes and opens his stupid mouth, holding up a still glowing finger, “technically, Dan’s the only one that’s totally dead. Me and Elle are still alive-ish”.

Bassel blinks again and asks something that Jazz really wishes he didn’t, “and why’s he the dead one?”, in a squeaky voice; the movie is absolutely long forgotten at this point.

Dan’s smirk is flat out evil and before anyone can stop him he responds, “oh only because I got my human shit torn out and disemboweled it. Ate half my uncle and flew off into the sunset”.

Bassel leans so far away he nearly falls off the couch, “what. The. Fuck”. While everyone else, even Elle, chastisingly shouts, “DAN FENTON!”, at the smirking full ghost. The tact on that jerk! The only tact he had was evil tact, that sought chaos and destruction!

“OoOooOOoOO, full name, I’m So HuRt. I’m So UtTeRlY aPoLoGeTiC. Truly”. The ass doesn’t mean a damn word of that and he wants them to know it. He smirks, “if we want to play that game I can just show him what I really look like”.

Danny standing up and pointing at Dan, “do that and I’m souping you”. Dan puts an offended hand to his chest and scowls deeply.

Bassel sputters, “I am never asking you people questions again, oh my god”.

Jazz can’t even blame him, even if she knows he eventually will ask more questions about, well, their everything. It was hard not to after all. She rubs his arm, “you really shouldn’t think about it too hard or worry, yes we’re used to it and know the admittedly weird science behind it”, cringing, “even if apparently only one of us was aware none of us looked normal”.

He blinks harshly, swallowing, “uh huh. You guys have a bathroom, right. Because I definitely need to decompress by staring into the mirror for a concerning length of time”.

Not good. Jazz wincing and getting up, “I’ll show you”, then pausing and eyeing Danny, “is the bathroom actually clean”.

Danny tilts his head and grimaces, also not good, “maybe don’t open the lower left cupboard”.

“Right”. Damn it, Danny. Pulling Bassel along as they head upstairs, “okay so listen to him and don’t get curious. He might have spilled something and not cleaned it so it’s gotten moldy. Or he shoved goddamn bandaging under there. Or there’s a ghost trapped in the cabinet”.

“I… kind of hate that I’m hoping it’s the first one”.

“Well considering it’s Danny, it’s probably the second. He gets injured a lot and has a non-existent biohazard safety mindset”, gesturing at the open bathroom, “anyway, here”.

… “is Danny why the shower floor looks bloodstained, wait never mind I don’t want to know”.

She gives him a supportive shoulder pat as he goes in and close the door almost hard. This… this has not gone well. At least he hasn’t ran out screaming? Yet anyways.

She heads back down stairs, pointing at Dan, “I’m blaming you, because it is your fault”, pointing at Danny, “and yours, because you somewhat made him”.

“Hey! He made himself!”.

“And he is you so my point still stands”.

“Jazz!”.

Jazz doesn’t really care that being reminded of that fact bothers her little brother, him and his off shoots have basically been terrorising her boyfriend. He should be bothered! “I am gonna be so mad at you if he decides this is too much”. At least everyone winces apologetically, except Dan who just glances away which was the closest he usually came to a ‘sorry’.

Jack rubs his neck, “sorry, Jazzy-pants. Want us to bring your guy’s stuff in?”.

She scowls, she’s not going to effectively trap her boyfriend here by doing that, “considering I don’t even know if he wants to stay here now, no dad”. Her dad winces further, good.

She sighs, flopping back down on the couch, “let’s just rewind and finish the movie. Like normal people”. Dan snorts at her and she glares bloody murder at him.

Okay. So. His girlfriend’s family are not ‘weird’, rather they are actually insane and physically impossible. Which is extremely not okay. But he likes Jazz, a whole lot actually. A ton even. She was odd but not insane or too physically impossible; and she didn’t live here, he wouldn’t have to see these people -especially Dan- often. A handful of times a year at best right now. Hell she might be annoyed enough to ban that Dan guy from being within ten feet of him; Bassel would not complain about that. Her parents at least seemed harmless, over enthusiastic and strange but acceptable. However he knew for a fact that him liking or not liking her parents didn’t mean much, she’s made it clear that she doesn’t think too highly about their opinions. Her brother though, he knows she loved that kid, sometimes she made it sound like she was more his parent than their parents were. Said brother was half freaking dead. Because apparently ghosts are a real thing and can just walk around the living like it’s nothing… and also apparently being half alive was a remotely possible thing. Also Danny, a teen, has kids. Two kids. One who’s clearly older than him and committed a likely extremely disturbing amount of murder.

Well…

They’re not Jazz’s kids. So he, maybe? won’t have to deal with them much. Jazz seemed surprised they were even here after all. Alright. Okay. He can deal with this.

That’s frankly a lie.

But he can at least manage and pretend he’s cool. Then, when they go back to uni he can have a mild freak out in his dorm room and their relationship can go back to sort of normal. He is absolutely going to ask about her ‘ecto-contamination’? later though, and if those stories about her ‘communing with ghosts’ were actually true and was she just talking to her brother or was she also talking to other ghosts.

Pushing himself off of the sink he’s been leaning on and slapping his cheeks, “you got this, man”. His reflection does not copy him.

What the actual hell is wrong with this place? Besides the apparent portal to the afterlife in the goddamn lab. How did these people break a mirrors ability to mirror? Shaking his head and pulling out his phone, okay he’s looking these people up, like he goddamn should have already.

…

Okay yeah they just are fully public with the ghost hunting thing huh? That must have been fun to grow up with. Jazz did say she tried to separate herself as much as possible from them as a teen, this is absolutely why. And apparently her brother saved an entire species of gorillas? By… climbing in one’s cage… so he’s just always been crazy and reckless, got it; but hey, at least the gorillas aren’t extinct now.

Bassel’s not surprised that looking up Elle gets him nothing, she’s a young child after all, but Dan? For a supposed murderer there isn’t even a single result about him. No wiki article, no victim impact statements, no mugshot, no public court files, no morally questionable serial killer podcasts, nothing. Weird. But he’s absolutely not asking the man about that, because he doesn’t know what kind of nightmarish response he’s going to get. Considering his age -aka, being literally older than his freaking parent- it might be some sort of time travel thing, which he mildly hates the entire notion of, especially since he’s not going to claim he knows what’s possible or not now.

After all, his reflection is still just ‘standing’ there staring at him while he’s been pacing back and forth staring at his phone. He’s not googling his girlfriend of course, that would be creepy, but what about the ‘Phantom’ thing? That… that gets a lot of results. Freaky ones.

…

So…

Apparently…

This town has a goddamn dead superhero? That’s a freaking colour inversion of Danny with green eyes and also named Danny? Which there is no way that’s ’just a coincidence’. So Jazz’s brother is kind of dead, has an ‘arch enemy’, and is almost definitely some kind of dead superhero. Cool. That’s… that’s not completely insane at all. He officially feels like he’s in a knock off marvel movie with a secret identity reveal and everything.

And oh hey! Girl in red on a jet sled, Danny’s girlfriend, also definitely a superhero. Cool. This is Hell.

… Based on all the photos and videos of full blown super powered fights this town might actually be part of hell or an afterlife full of apparently violent dead people. No wonder Jazz was leery of him so much as visiting her home town, nonetheless her parents. A google of the stats shows that these ‘ghost attacks’ happen multiple times a day and it looks like they sometimes did a concerning amount of damage. Also the mayor is that Vlad guy? The evil uncle god father arch enemy guy. Why? How even? … It was probably mind control. Oh he kind of hates this.

Also though, how the heck was this town and this whole ghosts and a death dimension situation, not known about world wide?!? If it’s some kind of government suppression of information he’s going to scream; not actually scream just… internally scream. You’d think this would be something that’s in national news, an actual real life superhero and villains, another dimension, the afterlife… Okay perhaps being super public about an after life could cause some issues among religious groups.

Then his reflection growls at him.

Nope.

He’s not dealing with that.

He’s out of the bathroom in two seconds flat, practically rushing down the stairs, wheezing. Everyone, but Dan, is on the couch again apparently finishing the bird movie; Dan is just outright nowhere to be seen which he is a-okay with. “My reflection growled at me”. Jazz buries her head in her hands, this was obviously not how she wanted this first meeting to go; it wasn’t how he wanted it to go either, but he didn’t know it going this absurdly was even possible. Meanwhile Maddie and Danny shout, “JACK!”, clearly thinking the mirror is his fault. Wasn’t something about him going to the mirror dimension mentioned earlier? or is he just starting to come up with his own crazy possibilities.

The large man runs his neck, laughing, “whoops! Must have grabbed the wrong mirror!”.

“Wrong? Mirror?”. Damn right, he said he was done asking these people to explain literally anything.

Bassel eyeballing Jazz’s dad as he gets up and begins to move upstairs, “ah yeah, Danny-boy head-butted the old one so it had to be replaced, musta got the new mirror and the dimensional mirror mixed up!”.

Why is this kid head-butting mirrors and why does this family just have a ‘dimensional mirror’? Ugh, Bassel’s poor head. Jazz apparently has these same questions, or one of them at least, as well as the willingness to ask it. “Little brother? Why were head-butting the mirror? Young Blood isn’t trying to give you another nervous breakdown, is he?”; Bassel can practically feel the worry in her voice.

Danny scowls dramatically, “I’m fine, Jazz. No need to psycho babble me, Ancients. Skulker just decided that tooth brushing time was good head shooting time, I confiscated his right arm for that and he didn’t get it back for three days”, the kid looks proud of himself, “he hasn’t attacked me in the bathroom since”.

Bassel blinks, slightly horrified, Danny what? stole some… ghosts arm? as punishment? “Uh, I’m pretty sure a supposed superhero teen is not supposed to go around stealing people’s limbs”. Jazz groans very loudly and very tiredly.

Danny laughs, “oh! You looked me up huh? Don’t worry, I only took his mecha bodysuits arm, not his actual real arm”.

That’s… stranger but better. Then Elle pipes up, “even if he had it wouldn’t matter! See-”.

“NO!”.

Bassel is not going to ask why Danny just grabbed both of her wrists and glared at her. He has absolutely learned that if someone, or everyone, shouts ‘NO’ at someone else then he absolutely did not want to know why. Instead he watches his girlfriend get up and smile very awkwardly at him, he’s unpleasantly aware of the fact that her teeth were probably whiter than they should be, “you okay? Are we good?”.

“Absolutely not, but yes, yes we’re alright. I am absolutely not visiting here frequently though. And if Dan ever shows up anywhere near my dorm I’m hitting him with a frying pan immediately”.

She actually chuckles at that, “that’s fair, I tried to shoot him when we first met and tried to hit him with the creep stick the second time”. He’s not going to ask what a creep stick is, but he’s glad she had the sense to hit someone who’s clearly dangerous. “But call if he does do something that stupid, which he shouldn’t if he knows what’s good for him. He will only laugh if you hit him with a frying pan”.

Maddie shaking her head and getting up, “I’ve done that a time or two, he has a habit of trying to sneak food or add poisons just to see if he can get away with it”. Bassel doesn’t have words to express how concerning that is. “And I’m sorry this hasn’t been the best impression, it’s also unfortunately not the worst either though”. Oh. This could be worse? How? Blowing up the house? Hospitalising him? Probably!

Elle sticks a star sticker on him, “congratulations! For passing the weirdness tolerance test!”, looking back at Danny, “am I allowed to try and bite him now?”.

“No, you little shit”, Danny grumbling, “teething preteens are the worst”.

Wasn’t teething supposed to be something babies did? He wants to ask but nope, he’s not going there.

Then Jack’s voice startles him a good bit, “Your reflection must have been staring at you for a while there, buckeroo! Had to really shake it to get him to go away”.

Man was Jack ever a loud guy. Bassel chuckling awkwardly, “yeah I was a little preoccupied and choosing to ignore the insane broken mirror”.

Dan has apparently come back, “ha! You’re lucky your reflection didn’t try to reach through the mirror and strangle you”.

Bassel is not asking. Bassel is not asking. Bassel is not asking. But note to self, do not ignore sentient reflections that move of their own accord. Jazz even shakes her head, “okay that wasn’t the smartest decision you could have made, but I get it”, and she gestures at the couch, “want to finish the movie? Then we can get our stuff in?”.

He sighs, tired, “yeah, yeah, that’s… that’s good”. Just let everything else be normal, or as normal as it can be with the literal walking dead being in the room. Elle grabs him and Jazz before dragging them to the couch, the child is way too strong.

Jazz can practically feel the relief in her bones when they make it through the rest of the movie without anymore incidents, everyone getting up and Jack grabbing a scowling disgruntled Dan to help bring stuff inside. Dan grumbling, “I feel the need to point out that Danny is just as strong as me even if he looks like a damn beanpole”.

Danny shouting, “you mean I’m stronger than you! And hey! I’m lean!”, after them.

Bassel quirking an eyebrow at Jazz, her shaking her head with a small smile, “ectoplasmic energy counts for more than physical appearances with ghosts, my little brother might still be a child and thusly hasn’t hit his growth spurt yet, but he can absolutely take his kid down a peg or two”. And he absolutely loved to pester Dan about that fact, while Dan loved to pester Danny about still being ‘puny’.

Dan growls from the garage doorway, “You lot would be dead otherwise and you know it”.

Jazz rolls her eyes, “maybe at one point but we’ve grown on you, don’t lie mister”. The full ghost only grumbles incoherently in response.

Of course her dad tries to open the trunk before Bassel can unlock it, resulting in him picking the car up, Dan having to catch the car when the trunk opens taking dad’s grip with it. Dan chuckling, “normally I’m the one who’s into picking up vehicles”.

Dad chuckling himself, “yeah and you usually throw them when you pick them up!”.

Bassel shakes his head as the full ghost sets his car on the ground fully, “do not throw my car, do all of you just have super strength”.

Jazz facepalms when her dad tilts his head like a puppy, “little cars like these aren’t that heavy though? I could have lifted this back in my college years even”. Bassel looks baffled when she glances at him.

Jazz sighing at her dad, “Dad, your parents were ghost hunters too, you’ve probably been contaminated your whole life, like me and Danny”.

“Oh right! Ha! I forgot about that! Silly me!”.

Bassel shakes his head in disbelief but takes a few of his things instead of letting the two much larger men carry everything. Jazz makes zero attempt to help Dan with any of it, her sticking her tongue out him instead. He snickers at her, “really taking the higher road here, aunty”.

“Like you’re one to talk”.

“The high road and I are incapable of coexistence”.

“Exactly”.

At least it seems like Bassel is fondly amused with their bantering, instead of disturbed, as they move from the garage and up to her old room/the spare room. Her eyeing her mom while the three men set things down in the room, “so where are Elle and Dan staying?”.

Dan scoffing from inside the room, “you say that like I sleep at all”. She studiously ignores him.

Her mom humming, “why don’t you ask Elle? Because I’m not sure”. And Elle pops out from behind Maddie, “we’re not. Grandma Pandora’s supposed to give me some sword fighting lessons!”, pouting, “and I gotta practice if I ever want to beat pops someday”.

Danny can be heard shouting, “like that’ll ever happen!”, from somewhere; and the little missy is off like a rocket after her dad probably to tackle him.

Dan growling, “if you try to make me organize your guys shit I’m going to intentionally remove every screw, battery, and third paper from everything I can get my claws on”, before Jack laughs and pushes the ghost out of the room. Dan eyeing Jazz, “and if you’ll remember, I’m not ‘allowed’ to be out past sunset”.

Ah right, she did actually forget about that. “Serves you right”. As he heads down and back to the living room he sticks his tongue out at her, it absolute is forked this time.

Bassel popping his head out of the room, “you want your studies and research notes left on the night stand? And remind me why we’re staying inside this strange house instead of a hotel, there’s… mold with eyes I think, in the corner”. Her wincing, “because the hotel has mandatory waivers and doesn’t allow Fenton’s”, then nodding up at him, “yeah my stuff’s fine there, don’t put anything in the drawers, sometimes stuff just vanishes inside for an unknown reason”. Based on him ducking back in immediately, he had in fact put some stuff inside a drawer and the sigh of relief and her dads light hearted laughter tells her that whatever it was was still there. At least some things were going right.

And then it promptly goes horribly wrong as soon as Bassel comes out to go back downstairs with her. A massive black star speckled ghost phasing their way down through the goddamn ceiling, Bassel going stalk stiff while Jazz dashes up the steps with him in her grasp and ducks both of them into the bathroom. Bassel sticking his head out of the bathroom while crouching just like her and whispering, “was that thing a freaking ghost? What the hell, babe”.

Her basically hissing at him, “yes, and a very powerful one”. Bassel grumbling, “I think today hates us”. She whole heartedly agrees.

Meanwhile the ghost is shouting, “PHANTOM! I request your aid!”, and from her and Bassel’s bathroom vantage point it looks like the ghost just got punched in their masked face -based on them being pushed back out of the kitchen entry way with a hand to their face- by Dan, who stomps out snarling, all fang but thankfully still human-looking, “wrong one, you sleepy ass”.

Starry sleep ghost… starry sleep ghost… ah right! Their name was Nocturne right? Her little brother did try to get her to remember the names of the more important ghosts after all. “Nocturne?”.

Oh she shouldn’t have said anything. The ghost looks to her and ‘brightens up’ in that cruel looking way many ghosts do, them promptly stretching and looming their body up and head over her and Bassel, “ah, young Phantom’s brethren. Do you know as to where I can find the one that will not attempt to eat beings of ancient malevolence?”. Bassel is shaking and she’s worried he’s going to pass out.

Dan rams a clawed hand into the ghosts body, “I’m true malevolence, mother fucker. Get back here”.

Thankfully Danny -in his ghost form unfortunately- pops in before Dan can do something stupid, “Dan! Leave the freaking god of sleep alone! Oh my Ancients!”. Him pointing at Nocturne’s face as the ghost moves down to him completely ignoring Jazz and Bassel now, “what the zone, Nocturne? You can’t just bust into my lair core whenever you feel like it just because I don’t get enough damn sleep”.

The ghost holds up a finger, “ah but that is hardly the reason for my arrival, I have seemed to ‘fucked up’, as you would say, to an unfortunate degree”.

Danny sighs and sags his entire body, floating in the air, “ugh, what did you do?”.

“I acquired-”.

Danny interrupting immediately, “You mean stole”.

“I acquired some eternal gardenia from FungalLung, they have now beset my domain with pink dew and blood blossom seeds”.

“Why the actual crap would you steal from that split personality psycho? There’s a reason no one goes near that kids garden”.

“I had a need for such things, as someone-”.

“Oh no, no blame game bullshit outta you, shit ass”.

“Our king needs to be-”.

“Needs to be allowed to have a bit of goddamn fun and some breaks, that’s what he needs. Now play guide, you reckless starry blanket”, Danny eyeing Dan, “Dan. Let. Go”.

Dan flinching and doing as he’s more or less commanded to. Scoffing, crossing his arms, and moving back into the kitchen with a tense, “whatever”.

Bassel wheezes when the ghost and her brother disappear through the floor, Jazz standing up fully and pulling him along with, “great. Just great. Love it. What next? An invasion?”.

Elle hums, “I mean, I could ask mythic grandma if she’s up for one”.

Jazz and Maddie both pointing at her aggressively with matching, “absolutely not”’s. Making the girl giggle. Jazz looking back to Bassel, “I promise you’re okay and not about to get attacked. Are you feeling okay?”.

“I am ten seconds away from wanting to lay on the carpet and scream cry into it, and I am positive I need a shock blanket”.

At least she doesn’t even have to ask her mom to get one for her to rush off and do so, Jazz and Maddie herding him into the spare room wrapped up in a Fenton ghost proof shock blanket in record time. Jazz nodding softly at her moms apologetic look and gesturing for her to leave them be, dad following his wife out with an exaggerated wince.

She shuffles up next to him and rubs his arm from over the blanket, effectively side hugging him, “okay so you’ve properly seen your first ghost, and they were unfortunately one of the non-human ones; but, Nocturne is quite safe actually, more a neutral being than malicious”.

He nods a little.

“They do tend to harass my brother a lot since they care a lot about sleep and he doesn’t get nearly enough of it”, shaking her head and laughing lightly a little, “and yes, what Danny said is true, they are for all accounts and purposes the god of sleep”, sighing, “nearly every god worshiped through out history is real and, yes, a ghost”.

He swallows, pulling the blanket around himself more, “that’s… kind of insane and a lot”.

Jazz nods more so to herself, she had a hard time swallowing that herself as a teen, “I know. I still find it a bit baffling myself and it is extremely strange actually meeting any of them”.

“At… at least you actually seem weirded out. Everything… else doesn’t seem to be, uh, strange, to you”.

“I’m used to it, more than I’d really like to be. I definitely wi- would prefer if my family was more normal, even marginally. And I’d rather my brother not be wrapped up in all this the way he is. Even Dan and Elle often feel that way, even if they wouldn’t exist if he wasn’t involved so heavily in everything”.

“That’s, concerning, actually”.

Jazz pats his arm some, “they haven’t had the best existences”.

Dan then startles her, voice coming through the door, “and there’s the simple fact that everyone would be better off if I never existed”.

Jazz sighing to herself and looking to the door, “Dan that’s not true”.

“And that’s crap and you know it, don’t bullshit me Jazz”; it sounds like he’s stomped off. She’s… going to have to talk to him later.

Bassel shivers, “he’s got a lot of… issues, huh”.

Jazz sighing and nodding, closing her eyes, “if people tell you you’re a monster enough that becomes all that you are and healing becomes nearly impossible”, shaking her head and looking at him, he’s watching her intently, “Elle and Danny are good for him but his emotions don’t work like they’re supposed to because of what happened to him. He’s also partly being pissy because Danny genuinely scolded him. Anyone exerting their power over him tends to rile him up, whether he wants it to or not”.

“Part of him being a, uh, ghost?”.

She nods, “yup. Though I doubt talking about Dan is great for you right now”.

Bassel looks away and stares forwards, “no, probably not”, shaking his head and readjusting into the blanket, “… that, ghost, called your brother a king, didn’t they”.

Jazz shrugs, “he tires not to let it get to his head”.

He shakes himself a little, shaking his head slowly side to side, “yeah no, I’m not pushing. Though is that why he feels like death, the pressure of death at least, when he looks all black and white”.

“I… if he feels like that I’ve never noticed, sorry. But I was living with him when that change happened so it very well might have happened slowly, over time”.

“I guess that makes sense, it almost felt hard to breathe when his voice got… thick? at Dan”.

Jazz blinks, nodding immediately, “ah that’s actually a specific power he has. He mostly just uses it to get across that he’s not playing around, that he’s being serious”.

“Effective”.

Jazz nods slowly, letting him just breathe for a bit. She guesses she can understand how her brother can be a bit much, and it was definitely for the best that Bassel found out before a ghost crashed the party that her brother was a ghost himself. Then he speaks up again, “you’re entirely alive, right? I know you have a lot of spooky rumours that follow you and, like I said, you do look off. So, you’re not a ghost, right?”.

Jazz is tempted to laugh, instead she just shakes her head, “no, not even a little bit”.

“Good. That’s good”.

She just hums, nodding to herself. Waiting for him to work through his own head. Hearing about ghosts and seeing one were very different things, and an Ancient was hard to run into no matter what Danny said. She swears it’s like he forgets that he is in the same sort of classification as them. But at least it seems like Bassel’s handling it better than many do, better than most non-Amity Parkers at least. And then her dad goes and bangs the door open, nearly making Bassel fling himself off of the bed, “I made hot chocolate!”.

“Dad! He’s trying to wind down! Not get the zone scared out of him!”.

Her dad wincing, “ah sorry, Jazzy”, holding up the two cups, “hot chocolate?”, and tilts his head to the side.

Jazz sighs, side eyeing Bassel to make sure he isn’t going to freak out further before getting up and grabbing the cups, “I know you mean well, dad, but you’re still a very loud, very large, presence”.

He rubs his neck and laughs awkwardly, tilting sideways enough to look at Bassel. Giving her boyfriend a thumbs up, “you kids get settled, no funny business”.

“Oh my zone!”, she shoves him out with a foot, barely managing not to spill, and kicks her door shut. At least she manages to give Bassel the hot chocolate gently, “that man, I swear”.

Bassel genuinely laughs though, staring at the hot chocolate in his hands, “that was so utterly normal dad behaviour though, it’s grounding actually”.

Huh. Guess he actually did a good job. “Then I owe him an apology”. She makes her sip on the hot chocolate -that’s already been adequately cooled, thanks dad genuinely- loud, purely to encourage Bassel to drink his.

He notices the cooled temp too, “he waited till it was cool but not too cool, huh?”.

“Yeah. He’s a bit of a fool and reckless but he cares a lot and has a good heart that’s as big as he is”.

Bassel humming and they sit in silence for a bit until, “is your brother going to be okay? I know I called him a superhero and google seems to say he is but…”.

“Oh superhero is very accurate by human standards, but by ghosts he’s basically normal. Behaviour wise at least. Most of the time”, shaking her head, “he’ll be fine, even if it sounds like he might wind up with a case of Blood Blossom poisoning again”.

“Let me guess, ghost poison?”.

“Yup”.

“That’s absurd”, and he sips at his hot chocolate some, “he’s not going to vomit on the floor is he?”.

Okay she can’t help but laugh at that, shaking her head, “no, no, more coughing fits, aches and pains, and muscle spasms. That’s only because he’s alive enough to not be fully affected”.

“Hence why this powerful ghost came for his help?”.

Jazz nodding, “hence why a powerful ghost came for his help”, tilting her head, “though if I remember right pink dew is a psychedelic, so he also might be high when he gets back”.

“Oh god, I don’t think that kid should ever do drugs. Being near your entire family is like being on drugs”, sticking his arms out of the blanket and gesturing the mug around, “if I woke up in the morning and was told this was all one big fever dream, I’d believe it”.

“That’s understandable. Which is why the rest of the world considers this town a hoax”.

“Yeah I was wondering about that”, he downs a considerable amount of his drink, “you’d think the whole world would know about this. But I guess that would cause an uproar”.

Jazz sighing, almost annoyed, “yeah, the government does try to keep a lid on everything”.

“God damn it. Seriously? Ugh. I hate that I called ‘government cover up’ as the why”.

“There’s more to it but the rest is a lot weirder to the point where even I don’t want to think about it. It’s actually in the category of too weird”. Her little brother mind wiping an entire planet after fighting a reality controlling clown that turned roads into rollercoasters and made him fight a fire breathing clown and a lava pit full of rubber ducks, was so many steps past extremely strange.

Bassel full body cringing, “then I definitely don’t want to know. I do want to know if the stories about you communing with ghosts in your dorm are true though, and if your dorms is ‘contaminated’”, looking down at the cup, “and we should thank your dad for this. It was pretty good”.

Jazz blushes a little, “they’re true, even ghosts need therapy and I don’t need my license to give it to them. Sometimes it is just Danny though, and I’m good about keeping on top of decontamination, so don’t worry about that”, then eyeing him, he still seemed a little out of it and shocky but he was definitely better and really there was no normalising or rationalizing her family, “we’ll go down and thank him if you’re alright”.

He nods down at the cup and to himself, then looking at her with a nod and shaking smile, “I’m going to be digesting all of this for days at least, but I’m okay, babe. I absolutely hope today was the weirdest day of this week visit though”.

Jazz hums, standing up and offering him her mug-free hand, “well Dan will avoid Danny for at least a full day and Pandora will keep Elle busy for at least three; so there won’t be their chaos for a little while. As for literal gods showing up, that happens so seldom that I genuinely believe that Johnny’s Shadow might’ve snagged us some bad luck on the way into town”.

“Johnny’s Shadow?”.

Oh maybe she shouldn’t have brought that guy up. Wincing, “um, Shadow is basically Johnny’s pet or familiar? And Johnny is a ghost I may have dated? Once? He wasn’t genuine about it, and I was a dumb teenager who feel for his stupid motorbike and bad boy vibes”.

He actually snickers at her, before laughing fully and having to put the mug to the side to avoid spilling it, “I! Can not believe how stereotypical! That is!”, shaking his head and wheezing, eyeing her, “straight laced, honor role daughter falls for a motorcycle riding bad boy who’s all charm and bad intentions”.

She smacks his arm, “don’t be mean”, she doesn’t mean it at all though, “and Danny actually dated his girlfriend, she was trying to make Johnny jealous”.

“So what I’m getting here is ghosts are seriously just goddamn people, some are just very extra”.

“That’s one way to put it, yeah. Or they’re more like animals”.

Bassel blinks as they shuffle out of the room, “oh thats right, the green dog, where’d he? go?”.

Jazz snorts, “Danny sent him back to, well, the other side as it were; since mom was trying to taser him”. He was always so protective of that dog, even if said dog caused so many issues.

“That did seem a bit excessive”.

“Oh absolutely not, that dog is an actual menace”.

“I’m just going to take your word for it”.

They pop into the kitchen, she’s not surprised both Dan and Elle are gone. “Thanks for the hot chocolate, dad”. Bassel nodding, “yeah, it was really good, thank you”.

Her dad gives a goofy thumbs up, “glad you liked it!”. And she thinks everything might just be okay.

Bassel’s not really sure what to do about all of this. What he does know is that he’s better off not thinking about it and not trying to actually figure out what to do about all of this. He knows Jack Fenton cares a lot, makes good hot chocolate, he’s loud and big, and sure he’s a little off and too strong but he actually is like a puppy. Maddie Fenton was a lot softer, a lot more aware that her family was odd, more socially adept, but she was also more threatening and quick to fight; strange and off as well but she came off as more normal than her husband. Danny was… a nightmare, full stop, he’s a little worried what kind of friends the teen had that could put up with him. He was borderline actually insane, but from what Bassel saw on his google trip he also was a genuinely good kid. Bassel’s fairly certain that even if the world turned against him he’d still fight to save it; that took a level of sheer determination and heart that Bassel probably didn’t have himself. Elle was just a weird kid with too lax and strange of a parent, she might stand a chance at being almost normal someday. Maybe. Dan was an utter psycho though, he honestly can not think of a redeeming quality for that one. Doesn’t even want to try. Because excusing a murderer was not a line he feels like toeing. Jazz says Dan wouldn’t hurt any of them and does love them, but he’s not sold on that; it seemed more likely that she just didn't want to admit that the man was simply an awful unkind corrupt person.

And Jazz?

Well, his opinion honestly hasn’t changed. She’s still awesome, beautiful, caring, neurotic, a worrier, and slightly strange. He wants to think she’d be the same, though maybe less strange, even if she had a perfectly normal and average family. He wasn’t about to let odd family break them up, even if it was the kind of odd normally reserved for tv shows and the weird comics you find at truck stops that are filled with plot holes and questionable narrative direction. Either way he’s sticking around, so long as he can actually physically survive a week in this place.

Him watching as Danny, covered in some kind of clear goo or slime, kicks open the lab door with blown out pupils and a gnarly rash on half his face. “I! Never want to see! Another! Fucking! Person with me damn mushroom eyes again! I feel! Disgusting! Bleh!”, sticks out his tongue and then faceplants onto the floor groaning; the slime stuff splatters around a bit.

Bassel blinks, “um, should someone drag him up to the bathroom or something?”. Then the kid sprouts another set of goddamn arms and hands out of his back and proceeds to dragging himself across the floor and up the stairs with them. “Never mind, what the hell. I never want to see that again”.

Jazz sighs, rinsing out their cups, “he’s definitely high, don’t touch the goo trail”, moving to get the biohazards mop and bucket, “Danny can be a bit of a jerk with the body horror stuff but he usually reserves it for people he knows can handle it”.

“That’s… good. Dear god”.

And then… Danny??? runs up the lab stairs, “did anyone see a body of mine”.

Jazz throws the mop at him and yelps, “what the Zone! Danny?”, making faces at him and pointing at the stairs that still has a slime trial on it, “I have some serious questions”.

He blinks at her, “rogue duplicate”, and runs towards the stairs.

Jazz throws up her hands, “why would you use a power you suck at to deal with drug flowers!”.

“Because I didn’t want to personally deal with blood blossoms!”, the kid slips on the slime and smashes his face into the stairs, “fuck!”, then scramble crawls up the steps.

Bassel grabs the mop back up, ignores that it’s a weirdly hot pink colour, and hands it off to his girlfriend, “so that was a thing that happened”.

Jack starts wheeze laughing, sitting down at the kitchen table, “I hope his duplicate at least had fun!”.

Maddie grinning at the man, “I’m sure it did, Jack hon”.

Everyone, including Bassel, ignores the strange thumping going on upstairs as well as the… arm that comes hurling down the steps and dissolves into green goo against a wall. Staying here was going to give him some extremely unique and unfortunate nightmares, wasn’t it? At least now he gets why his girlfriend had such an easy time writing behavioural papers, she had multiple subject studies. He might even be able to bang out a paper or two on human adaptability after this. He absolutely was not doing any papers on people growing arms out of their backs though, that would get him sent on a grippy sock vacation.

Danny pops back in looking disgusted, “it’s dealt with”.

Maddie eyeing him cautiously, “is the hall way intact?”.

The boy sags and gives a truly crushed, “no”.

At this point, Bassel thinks that’s frankly expected. He also thinks that this household is cursed. At least Jack bounds up the stairs to start fixing the hallway and Bassel legitimately doesn’t care to check out the damage. Truly. Instead he’s just going to sit down with his girlfriend and, like her, mildly regret him coming and going into this ‘cold turkey’. Next time she warns him about something, he’s going to demand an explanation instead of brushing her worries off.

End.

Promtps: Jazz brings a date home for the first time. She didn’t exactly brief them on her family’s whole ghost thing. Antics ensue. All the Fentons are a bit more ghostly than they know The Phantom Clan (Dan, Dani, and Danny) is awake and about to make it everyone's problem Jazz has a reputation at college for being spooky, it doesn't help that she communes with ghosts. Uncanny valley is strong with Danny, most Amity Parkers don't realize it, but any time anyone from out of town sees him, they're in for a spook. Nocturne fucked up BIG TIME and now needs help from the ghost kid.

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scarletsaphire · 25 days

Text

Danny missed last gym class through no fault of his own, which is normally fine. It’s just that now they’re putting the self defense moves to work, and Danny’s been paired with Valerie. Great; guess he’ll be getting his ass kicked by her twice in one day.

@phicphight fic 3! This one is for @tourettesdog and @lovelyunknown! Prompts used are at the end.

"Mrs. Tetslaff. Mrs. Tetslaff please you don't have to do this," Danny begged.

"Shut it, Fenton," she said, not even sparing him a glance. "Partners are final, no swaps. Besides, being with Gray will do you some good. Maybe if she tosses you around enough, you'll put some effort forward in my class." She chuckled, before turning back to the rest of the class and bringing the whistle to her lips.

Danny made his way back to Sam and Tucker's side as she finished announcing the rest of the pairings. "As if I don't already get my ass handed to me by Val enough. Now I get to experience it in class too."

"If it makes you feel any better," Tucker replied. "I'm also going to get absolutely destroyed."

"Damn right you are," Sam nodded. The two of them had been made partners, probably because Mrs. Tetslaff knew that she wouldn't hold back. Tucker knew it too.

"That does make me feel a bit better," Danny admitted. "At least I won't be suffering alone."

"Okay everybody!" Mrs. Tetslaff's voice cut through their conversation. "Gather with your partners; I'll be coming around to monitor you all, but other than that, its a free for all. Use whatever moves you remember from our self defense class yesterday."

Danny nodded along with the rest of the class before making his way over to where Valerie was standing on the side of the gym. He held up his hand in a not quite wave as he approached, which Valerie returned.

"Hi."

This conversation was going just as well as he thought it would.

"Do you want to start on the offensive?" Valerie asked.

"Uh, yeah. Sure. I can do that. Unless you want to go first?" Danny asked.

"I've been taking karate since I was five. I don't need the practice. You do," Valerie replied. "Besides, even if you do manage to land a good hit, I can probably handle it a lot better than you can, and I don't want you using a bruise to try and get out of this."

Danny hesitated. He could handle this just fine; he'd tussled with plenty of bigger threats before, even without his ghost powers. Hell, he tussled with Val every night, albeit with the aforementioned ghost powers, when the red-gray of her suit blended in with the regular gray clouds and night sky. He wasn't worried about getting hurt.

What he was worried about was the fact that he didn't remember a single thing from his last gym class. Dash had locked him in the locker right before, and then Johnny and Shadow showed up, and they were always time consuming to deal with. Even if dealing with them this time looked a whole lot more like buying them a milkshake.

Either way, by the time he'd managed to make it back to the school, the class had been almost completely over, and the only thing he managed to see was Sam suplexing Tucker onto the mat, which, according to Tucker, hadn't even been a move they were supposed to be practicing. This meant that Danny was yet again stuck in the predicament he was in every single time he had to do anything in this Ancient's forsaken class: how much could he actually, realistically do?

The answer was always a resounding not much. He could normally fake it pretty well, but when he didn't know what he was supposed to know? It became a whole hell of a lot harder.

"Actually..." Danny started slowly.

"You forgot, didn't you?"

Danny rubbed at the back of his neck.

Valerie rolled her eyes, and the faintest hint of a smile played across her face. "I guess that means I'm going first."

"I guess so."

"Okay, I'm going to do this slowly, so try and pay attention." Valerie made her way directly in front of him. "Hold your hands up like this." Danny copied Valerie's pose, one very different than he'd seen her take during the night. Probably because she didn't have any guns. "You ready?"

Danny gave one nod. He’d barely finished moving his head before Valerie was lunging towards him, fists flying towards his face. It was a conscious effort to not turn intangible, which meant that he didn’t have the brainwidth to try and clock the hit, or dodge out of the way, or do anything that didn’t result in a fist to the face.

It was good to know Valerie hit hard , even without her suit.

Danny stumbled backwards, blinking stars out of his vision, hand coming up to his nose that he knew was bleeding. It wasn't broken, at least.

"Oh shit," he heard Valerie say, and in an instant she was by his side. "I did not mean to hit you that hard I swear."

Danny waved her off with his free hand. "Yeah, well, I'm the one who stood there like an idiot." He removed his hand from his face, looking down at it. Yeah, he was definitely bleeding. "I'll be fine."

He looked to her when Valerie didn't give an answer, and was surprised to see her staring down at his hand in shock. "Valerie?" he asked tentatively. Still no answer. "It was an accident, you didn't mean to-"

He was cut off by Valerie grabbing his wrist and dragging him towards the doors of the gym. "Wh- Val! What the hell?" he asked.

"We need to have a talk. Now." Her voice was steely, a tone he couldn't remember her ever using with him. At least, not with human him. It was enough to shut up any future protests, and he allowed himself to be dragged along obediently.

They kept going even after they were out in the hallway, down a few doors until they got to a storage closet that Danny knew was mostly empty. Valerie pulled the door open and shoved him inside, slamming the door behind her.

Danny had absolutely no idea what was happening.

"I think you have some explaining to do," Valerie said with her arms crossed and her foot tapping a hasty rhythm on the tiled floors.

"I'd love to, I really would, but I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about," Danny asked, raising his hands in mock surrender.

"Oh? Then how are you gonna explain that?" She titled her head towards Danny's bloody hand.

"You punched me in the face!" Danny answered. "Nose bleeds happen when people get punched in the face!"

By her sharp inhale, it was clear that wasn't the answer Valerie was looking for. "It's green Danny."

"Oh." Danny brought his hand back around in front of him, squinting at the now dried blood stain. It looked more like a red-gray than a green-gray to him, but then again, there wasn't much difference between shades of gray. "I didn't know that."

"How do you not know that your blood is green?"

"Frankly, I didn't know my blood was red until I was like. Eight years old. So this isn't the first time this has happened!"

Valerie took a deep breath and brought her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose. Uh-oh. Danny's natural defense was getting on her nerves. That never ended well. "Ok, your idiocy aside, why the hell is your blood green?"

"That. Is a very good question!"

Danny ran through every possible excuse he could think of. Some of them might've worked if it was literally anybody else who had figured this out, but Valerie wasn't just some random student who would believe "Fenton Weirdness" as a catch all excuse. She had experience with ghosts, and ectoplasm, and more importantly, was also exposed to the same technology Danny would normally blame this on.

"Would you believe me if I said I snorted ectoplasm before class?"

"Not when you say it like that."

"Well, crap."

TourettesDog - Danny is red-green colorblind. This never caused him much trouble before the accident, but now, well… It would have been nice to know beforehand that his blood was the wrong color. LovelyUnknown - Danny's identity is found out in the funniest way possible.

#danny phantom #danny phantom fanfiction #danny fenton #valerie gray #phic phight #identity reveal #team human #phic phight team human

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dp-marvel94 · 1 year

Text

Reveal via Clones

Summary: Maddie and Jack walk in on fives clones waiting for Danny in his room.

Word Count: 2,164

Also on AO3

For @lovelyunknown, @brokeitwiththepowerofmathamatics.

Note: Losely set in my "Life and Death is All Perspective" (ie all the clones come back as full ghosts) Series. My last story for phic phight! Prompts Below: Maddie finds damning evidence in Danny's room. by LovelyUnknown Good Dad Jack identity reveal by Hazama_d20 I saw that first prompt and thought "What more damning evidence than a bunch of clones?" 😂 My original idea was a lot more cracky than what I actually ended up writing. But I'm a serious angst writer so that figures. Enjoy!

Maddie had made up her mind. Tonight was the night. She and Jack were going to talk to Danny about everything. His failing grades, skipping school, missing curfew, getting into fights.

Ignoring the problem hadn’t worked. Punishing Danny, hoping he would change his behavior, hadn��t work. Talking to Danny, reassuring him that he could tell them anything, even that hadn’t worked. Instead, Danny took to avoiding them.

But the mother had had enough. She was getting answers out of her son tonight. Even if they had to wait in his bedroom all night for him to come home. Her son wouldn’t suffer alone in silence anymore.

As the couple approached Danny’s room, voices rang out through the door.

“Oh! What’s this?” A curious voice with a bit of a lisp asked.

“Ezekial, be careful with that.” A different voice, smoothly sophisticated, gently rebuked.

A crash. “Oops.”

The adults froze at the noise, exchanging worried looks. Jack reached for the door knob.

“That was Danny’s favorite model rocket.” A third spoke, words with a disappointed note.

Maddie’s hand rested on the other adult’s arm, stopping him with a nod of her head.

“Let’s pick it up.” A deeper male voice. “Maybe we can fix it?”

“There’s some glue in the desk.” The third speaker.

Who were these people in Danny’s room? Friends from school?

“Maybe we should wait until Danny gets back.” A pre-teen girl’s voice spoke up, sounding a bit unsure. “I don’t know how this is supposed to go together.”

The woman’s eyes widened. There was something odd about the other voices, compared to the girl who just spoke….

“I think I remember.” The third said. “This one wasn’t really that hard to put together. It was one of his first.”

The eye-roll was almost audible. “Not all of us received memories from our progenitor, Damian.”

Progenitor? What was he talking about?

“That wasn’t my fault, Neil.” A teasing point, presumably from this Damian.

“I’m pretty sure it was.” The girl quipped.

“None of us knew overshadowing could do that.” Another audible eye-roll.

Overshadowing…. Something only a ghost could do and… A hint of dread settled in Maddie’s stomach. That is what she had been picking up on; every voice but the girl’s had a strange echo….

“Memory stealer.” The lisping voice teased.

“It’s just copying!” Damian, the object of teasing, argued. “Pro, come on. You’ve gotta defend me. You know I’m your favorite sibling.”

“Nah, Ellie’s my favorite.” The deeper voice joked, the smile audible.

“Yes!” The girl cheered.

Maddie didn’t understand. The echoes… these were a bunch of ghosts? Of sibling ghosts? How could ghosts even have siblings?

Then again, it wouldn’t be the first time ghosts surprised them. Phantom did, again and again showing that he genuinely wanted to help, hence their truce. Phantom wasn’t a bad ghost but, this group, joking with each other in…

“I’m your favorite brother, at least.”

“Nah, that’s Danny.” The deeper voiced speaker again teased. “Speaking of, when is he getting back?”

In their boy’s room. Ghost might not have been as bad as she and Jack previously thought. But these were five strangers! Ghosts they’d never even heard before, waiting for their baby in his bedroom.

With that thought, the mother pulled her ectogun out of her belt. She and Jack met eyes, the man doing the same. A silent count to three and…

The knob was turned, door kicked open. “Eat Fenton Bazzoa, ghosts!”

Maddie’s eyes quickly took in the scene. Four ghosts. One wearing a white cloak, red eyes and green skin. Phantom or… no, somehow she knew (maybe it was the way he held himself or maybe something else) this was a look-alike. Another Phantom look-alike, though all of four feet tall. And a towering ghost, covered in scars.

The woman set her sights on the big one, finger hovering over the trigger. She didn’t want to shot but she was prepared if-

“Mads!” Jack gasped in surprise beside her, his weapon lowering. “Look.”

“Jack!” Her eyes darted to the object of his interest. “What-” She cut herself off, eyes widening.

The fifth occupant of the room, the pre-teen girl…. She was human, staring at them with wide, frightened eyes. That wasn’t the surprise. But…

The jet black hair and…. those eyes, crystal blue, exactly identical to…

“Danny?” Maddie asked.

Her head shook. No, she wasn’t Danny, obviously, but…

“Who are you?” Jack asked, voice as numbly shocked as the woman felt.

“Clones of your son.” The Phantom look-alike’s eyes widened, mouth snapping shut as soon as the words left his mouth.

Maddie blinked, her own gun dropping at the surprise. “Excuse me.”

The ghost’s eyes panickedly flickered among the others. “We are all…. Clones of your son, Danny Fenton?” His chests turned green, in a blush(?). “We were created by your college friend, Vlad Masters. He wishes to kill Jack Fenton, blaming you for the accident which killed him and for stealing Madeline from him. He has planned to marry you, Maddie, and claim your son as his heir and apprentice.”

Neither parent reacted, numb with shock. The other ghosts and the girl also stared, jaws dropped and eyes wide with disbelief.

The lack of response seemed to just encourage the ramble. “Danny proved quite, understandably, hostile to this plan, refusing to betray his father. Despite his efforts, Vlad could not achieve his goal of acquiring Danny as a son. Therefore he decided to create his own version of the boy, one who would be amenable to his plans, hence…” He motioned awkwardly. “All of us.”

Maddie… hadn’t registered half of that. Yet her spinning minds caught on one thought. “But…. you’re all ghosts?” The words came out surprisingly quiet.

“We all died before becoming stabilized.” The Phantom (Danny?!) look-alike raised one brow, before motioning to the girl. “Except for Danielle, of course. Besides, Danny himself is half-”

Something in the statement roused the other Phantom look-alike, an elbow to the side cutting off the word. “Dude! You can’t tell them everything!”

The taller’s mouth snapped shut, visibility embarrassed. “I may have committed an error….”

“I’ll say!” The shorter raised his arms. “I thought you were the smart one, Daniel.”

The other look-alike, apparently named Daniel (?!), blinked skeptically. “Why would you think that?”

“You always use long words and…. It’s like you don’t even know what an apostrophe is.”

“Damian, I know what an apostrophe is.”

The shorter, Damian, placed his hands on his hips, an eyebrow raised challengingly. “Then use one.”

“I don’t think I will.” Daniel’s nose turned up. “You are not the boss of me.”

Maddie watched the argument like it was a tennis match. They were… arguing. Like normal siblings. Like… normal kids.

“Mads…” Jack’s uncertain voice beside her. The woman half-tuned out the ensuing argument, turning a tentative eye to him. “Mads. I think he… Daniel’s… telling the truth.” The next words came out more confident. “And if he is, then…”

The man put down the bazooka, uncertainty still in his eyes but no doubt, the action completely deliberate. He stood, shoulders back as if steeling himself. Then, he calmly stepped forward.

The kids froze, chatter cutting off. All eyes widened with fear.

Jack put his arms out, hand up disarmingly. His gaze fixed on the largest ghost “You’re a big one. Regular chip off the ole block.” A step forward, his expression strangely soft compared to his normal boisterousness. “What’s your name, son?”

The ghost shifted nervously, frantic eyes flickering from each of the other clones to Maddie and finally to Jack. He swallowed. “Um. It’s Prometheus, sir.”

“Prometheus.” The adult tested out the name. “That sounds greek. Isn’t it?”

“It’s uhh…. A long story.” The ghost, Prometheus, rubbed the back of his neck. (And didn’t the gesture look achingly familiar). “And everyone calls me Pro.”

“It’s a good name.” Jack chuckled. “And look at you! Swimmin’ in my end of the gene pool. Those spare hazmats we made for Danny and Jazz definitely won’t go to waste now!”

Pro did not respond, trading a vaguely panicked look with the girl. But the tension didn’t deter the man from continuing. He turned to the Phantom look-alike. “And you’re Daniel. Sharing a name with our Danno, I see.”

“Well. Yes, that is true…” A nervous swallow.

“Mads picked out the name. I wasn’t the biggest fan but she let me pick out Jazzy’s name.” He shrugged. Then, taking in the embarrassed face. (Maddie’s heart ached… it reminded her of a four year old Danny, caught stealing from the cookie jar). “You’re as green as an unripe tomato.” A kind chuckle. “Don’t feel embarrassed, kiddo. You’re not the first Fenton man to panic and say something he shouldn’t. And you probably won’t be the last.”

Daniel traded a look with his shorter look-alike, a silent conversation passing through. (Jazz and Danny had done the same, even this morning. These two… they all really were siblings, weren’t they?). Both relaxed ever so slightly.

“You’re taking this well.” The shortest said cautiously.

“I’m sure it’ll hit me later.” Jack laughed. “And your name was Damain, right?”

The ghost boy, Damian, nodded, puffing out his chest slightly. “I picked that out myself.”

“It’s a good one too. And…” His eyes flickered up, over Damian’s shoulder. “And who’s the quiet one over there?”

The short ghost floated to the side, the cloaked one drifting forward. “He’s Ezekial.” Damian answered.

“Zeke.” The thin figure lisped, spelling out the name with his fingers.

“Zeke.” Jack smiled. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Cautiously, Zeke floated forward, just two feet in front of the man. A tentative hand reached forward. Jack offered, letting the thin fingers brush his for a hand shake. “You are… kinder than I thought.”

Something in the man’s expression cracked. “Oh kiddo…” With gentle squeeze off the fingers, he removed his hand, the motion deliberate, unlike the falling of his shoulders.

Jack turned, finally smiling at the girl. “And you’re Danielle.”

“Ellie.” She shifted nervously. “Sorry for barging into your house.”

“Non-sense, princess.” He waved her off. “You, all of you are….” Maddie saw it, in the moment their eyes met. He was seconds from pulling this kid, all of these kids into his arms. “You're all….” That word, on the tip of his tongue….

“Family.” Maddie could hardly believe the word coming from her mouth. But… “You’re family.”

She knew it was true, like the way her heart ached and her hand shook, the ectogun…. Ectogun…. She should holster that. The weapon returned to her belt, eyes fixed back on the children.

The faces looking back at her… she saw Danny in them, herself and Jack’s features, despite the ghostly glow and…. The woman felt seconds from crying. That ghostly glow… meaning they, most of them, had died. Her own flesh and blood passed away, gone before she even knew about them, much less held them.

No. Not gone.

Maddie stepped forward. “How many clones…” She swallowed. “How many of you are there?”

Ellie’s brow furrowed, eyes on each sibling. “Well, there’s the five of us. And… how many does Percy count as?”

Suddenly a green swirling portal opened. Just when Maddie thought her world couldn’t be turned anymore on its head….

A ghost with four arms floated through. “I heard someone say my name.” The opening closed, leaving a sixth similar-looking figure floating in the room.

“Percy!” The quiet, cloaked ghost exclaimed. “How many do you count as?” The words, again slow and lisping.

One of his hands tapped the new ghost, Percy’s chin. “One or…” The three eyes (he had three eyes?!) blinked, brow furrowed in thought. “Twenty-six. Depending on how I feel.”

Maddie just blinked at the sight, a hand going to her forehead. “We have so much to talk about when Danny gets home….”

Still…. The woman looked over the group of kids, five(?) ghosts and one human. The girl, human and seemingly healthy was a relief. But the others… even if they were ghosts, they were her children. That was as clear as the siblinghood in-between them, an undeniable truth her heart spoke.

Though, something niggled in her mind. Their apparent relationships with Danny. Their origin, created by Vlad. That sounded insane but… her stomach turned. With his obvious obsession with her, his strange interest in Danny, and questionable behavior, it made a sick kind of sense.

But that comment, about Vlad having… died? And Danny…. Daniel had been about to say something about him.

Her mind was flailing for connections, that familiar ache welling in her chest. That familiar spectral appearance. Phantom look-alikes, she’d thought when she’d first seen Daniel and Damian. There was a resemblance to Danny too. Almost… almost as if….

Just then, Phantom phased through the window. “Sorry that took so long.” A bright white ring of light flared from his middle as soon as he landed, passing over him. “What did I… miss?”

The light disappeared, revealing….

“Danny?!?!!?”

Note: So that's the story. :) I'm uncertain if this will remain canon to the "Life and Death is All Perspective" Series. I'd always pictured Danny choosing to tell his parent about all his clones but this is fun too. So we'll see.

Also, I can't believe that I finally wrote the "Jack and Maddie meet Ellie" story, despite hinting at it a bunch of times in other phics. And this is freaking it. 🤣🤣🤣

#danny phantom #my fic #phic phight 2023 #phic phight #DP Clones #Danny Phantom Clones #Life and Death is All Perspective

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jeysecretive · 5 months

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GIFT DAY

I've been swamped with things to do, so now I'll continue giving out gifts (Christmas presents already lol) , wish everyone a good time!

POST 2 🎁

@lefatfacedone ⬇️

(He saw Amy carrying mistletoe hehehehe)

@okkks-blog ⬇️

@impulseowlll ⬇️

He's feeding mints to a Christmas gremlin. (Yeah, I was drawing the same poses, but fantasy said lol)

@anjiedear ⬇️

@flametiger77 ⬇️

@moderator-monnie ⬇️

Somebody's about to get hurt now

@xedgehxg ⬇️

@eggnetmotobug ⬇️

@richdinero45 ⬇️

@lovelyunknown ⬇️

smol guy lil guy

#sonic characters #sonic the hedgehog #sonic #my art #sonic the hedghog fanart #shadow the hedgehog #shadow #amy rose #knuckles the echidna

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niyana-the-ambiguous-mobian · 26 days

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@lovelyunknown

AYO, WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO WIN THE BOOP BATTLE? THERE ARE OTHER COMPETITORS /lh

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skarlettskwrl · 1 year

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A broken tether, A new path forged.

For: @q-gorgeous @tourettesdog @kawaiijohn @lovelyunknown @modordracena

Summary: Jack and Maddie discover their mistakes regarding their son and need to make it right. Also on AO3: A broken tether, A new path forged.

Danny sneezed. He didn't know why; it was mid-spring. So, must it be allergies? But was it, though? He shrugged it off. He was glad to be enjoying his time with Sam and Tuck. Ghost sightings had been at an all-time low. Zero. Even the lower ghostly fauna, like blobs and spites, have been strangely absent. He knows he should be worried, but it's honestly pretty nice. This afternoon was in the low seventies. He kicked a rock down the road. He, Sam and Tucker were on the way from the local bowling alley.

Danny tuned back into their light-hearted conversation. His friends were laughing at a joke he’d missed. But he chuckled as well, not wanting to be left out. Sam smiled.

“I don’t get it, Danny. How is your aim with a bowling ball soo baaad.” Tuck teased. He scoffed, but Tucker continued, “I mean, you have perfectly good aim as Phantom. How does a bowling ball change things?” Danny kicked the rock with a little more force down the road. Danny shot Him an incredulous stare.

“You’re one to talk. Mister gutter balls. At least my rolls actually hit some pins.” Danny teased in turn. “And I have to pull my throws. It’s hard to gauge sometimes.” He grumbled under his breath. Tucker conceded, then turned to Sam, who was smirking at their exchange.

“Why are you so good at like every sport ever!” Tucker whined. Sam closed the distance. Sam laughed.

“You could be too, if you too if you didn’t have this aversion to touching grass.” Her tone was pretty condescending. Danny shoved his hands in his pockets.

He turned to them and cut in. “If you could be one of my rouge galleries for a day, who would it be and why?” Danny had succeeded because his friends’ argument ceased as they both contemplated.

“Technus, the way can manipulate tech is sick. It’s honestly wasted on him, with how he uses flawed software. His hardware is top-notch.” Tuck pumps his arm for emphasis.

“Hey, how do you think Technus could actually build or design hardware without possessing some base machine first? Like building something from scratch?” Danny thinks he’s only seen the tech ghost possess and modify. Was it just an innate thing? Or actual understanding?

Danny’s thoughts were cut off when he was hit with a strong sense of wrongness. He felt phantom hands brush along his limbs. Someone was touching him.

His tether.

They were moving him.

Defiling him.

Sam grabbed Danny’s shoulder. He barely felt it. His breaths were coming in greedy gulps now.

“Danny, what’s wrong?”

“So- Some-one’s found it. I need- ” Danny trailed off in heavy gasps. He broke out of Sam’s grasp. Danny stumbled down the sidewalk a few paces. Then he remember it he could shift.

He did, and God, it was soo much worse. Everywhere! It was fucking everywhere! He could feel it with his whole being. Their fucking hands! They were rubbing something all over him. It was also appearing on his skin, red and sticky.

It fucking burned!

He shot off in the direction his core was urging him to go with increasing franticness.

Earlier that day at Fenton Works.

Maddie was finishing folding and putting away clothes. She and Jack’s latest efforts to keep ghosts out of Amity had been working. They had been planting Sanguinem Germinabunt, more commonly knowns as Blood Blossoms. More so around their house because it housed the portal, and other places the ghosts most frequented.

Maddie wasn’t stupid she knew their anti-ecto blast doors weren’t perfect. No matter what changes they made, ghosts always slipped through. Though the blossoms seem to be the most effective method so far. They had seen neither hides nor hairs of any ghost, especially that dratted Phantom.

She put more socks in his drawer. Danny had been short of breath and sneezing quite a lot. She should book an appointment. That’s when she saw a small composition notebook, well worn. It looked like a diary of sorts. Curious, flipped it open. She immediately felt guilty and closed it again. But, this might give her a glimpse at what’s been wrong with Danny.

They’d been so close. It was only about 18 months that the changes presented themselves. No, she needed to do this! She flipped it open.

And started reading.

Maddie sat on the edge of her late son’s bed, shell-shocked.

That’s how her husband, Jack found her. He asked what’s her what was the matter, and she wordlessly handed him the notebook. He took it from her and began reading. He sat down next to her.

A tear rolled down Jack’s cheek. He hugged Maddie for comfort. Maddie broke down and cried in his shoulder.

They sat like that for a while. The silence was thick in the air.

Jack gently uncoupled from Maddie. He stood up. “Madds, we gotta make this right.” Maddie looked up at him, her face completely desolate.

“Too little too late, Jack.” Maddie’s voice was strained with the effort of holding off more ugly sobs.

Jack left her to retrieve something from the storage room just down the hall. She guessed this based on the rustling.

Her husband soon returned with one of his ancestors, much like the one detailing blood blossom use and cultivation.

Jack quickly started flipping to an entry he obviously remembers from a prior reading.

How to set a ghost free. A permanent exorcism. They knew the rough location. Now they just need to prepare.

Maddie would give her boy a proper send-off.

“It should be right around here,” Maddie grunted as she hacked through the foliage. They had to abandon the GAV to continue on foot. This neck of the woods was too tight for it. Jack was carrying most of the supplies they’d need.

They finally got to the edge of a clearing. It was just like the journal description. There at the other end, was the large oak tree. At the base was a large patch of grave bloom hugging its shade. A flower that only grows near corpses as they emit ecto-radiation as the body breaks down.

It was still an abnormally large patch. More akin to a mass grave than the single one they know is there.

“Jack fluid, I think we found it.” Jack unhooked the canister of fluid and began dousing the patch. It was a concoction that leached ectoplasm from the grave blooms and the ground purifying the area. The delicate blooms quickly wilted and blackened. That was the first step.

Once the ectoplasm had been thoroughly cleaned, it was time to start digging. It didn’t take long. Maddie saw the melted glove first. She chokes at the sight and backs up into who catches her as her knees give out.

“I guess I was holding out some hope. But seeing it now…” She breaks down in a fit of sobs again. Jack sets them both and gives Maddie a few minutes.

“Come on, we need to finish this.” He helps her up to her feet.

Soon they unearth the rest of him.

The body was very well preserved despite the damage from the cause of death. Most of the skin was charred black. There were green Lichtenberg figures all over the corpse, even after all this time, still positively radiating ecto energy, looking recent. It explained that large patch of grave blooms.

They set him down and prepare the paste. It was a special blood blossom mixture, highly flammable. They soon coated the body with the blood blossom paste. It was meant to weaken the ghost’s foothold over the corpse.

Now it was time for the final step.

That’s when they feel static and cold. Phantom arrived. Their son’s remnant. But he was wrong. His eyes were solid green. His skin and suit were fracturing. He was covered in the paste as well, a red vapour wafting off of him.

“What the fuck did you do to my body?!” The scream was layered with shifting, creaking, groaning, and shattering ice.

A tear rolled down Maddie’s cheek as she dropped the lit match.

Danny saw as the match landed on his corpse. He could do nothing as it ignited. It burned hot with a blue flame. He felt his outer shell fracture further before mimicking his body by erupting into a ghostly green fire.

He was too weak to fly, let alone walk, so he crawled. He needed… need to get… to get to his body.

He crawled at an agonizingly slow pace. He didn’t know why.

Danny couldn’t move. He had too little energy. Even just simply existing now was taxing.

Crack

He whimpered and keened it was all too much. His mom walked over and gather him up in her lap. He renewed weakened struggles trying to get away, back to his body. He needed… needed-

Dark started to encroach on the edges of his vision. He felt his mom cart her finger through his hair like when he was small. It was comforting. But there was something he needed to do, right? He thinks it was important. Why had he been so angry before?

He was scared, confused, and in so much pain. Why was Mom’s smile so soft? His Dad sat beside him, squeezing his hand.

The pain was fading. He was pretty sure that was probably a bad thing.

“It’s all right, Danny-boy. Now you can find peace now.” His Dad’s voice was unnaturally quiet, it carried a soft, sombre quality to it.

“We’re so sorry we hadn’t noticed the extent of your suffering sooner.” Mom choked on the start of more sobs. “Oh God, we did this to you! Our invention did this!”

Dad wrapped his arm around Mom, holding her and Danny closer to himself. He didn’t understand. What was going on?

“But we’re making it right now.” Danny tried to ask what was happening, but his voice was too weak, and they couldn’t pick up what he said.

Mom shushed him, “It will be all over soon.” It clicked into place slower than he wanted, the thick brain fog nearly stopping his thoughts.

He was dying.

For real this time.

Crack

His vision faded, but he could still hear and feel his parents. This was not what he expected when they found out. At least this was a mostly peaceful end. He was not fading on an exam table. He saw no hatred in their eyes before his vision left him. They loved him. He smiled.

Crack

Another crack filled with love.

There was an odd tingling warmth that was comfy. But it was fading like the rest of his senses. Danny was really tired. Maybe, he’d take a nice nap. Yeah, one of those sounded nice.

Danny’s core soon couldn’t support the ectoplasmic matrix it was housed in. Danny was losing the feeling of his parents, but he knew they were still there. It started with his fingers and toes working up to his wrists and ankles. It accelerated once it passed his elbows and knees. Soon he was nothing but his core, tiny and fragile.

Then there was the final crack, and with it, the tether snapped.

The elder Fenton’s sat and held each other. They had done it. Their boy was now at peace. The clearing was mostly intact, sans the scorched and overturned soil.

Maddie had taken it upon herself to plant more blood blossoms to leach any remaining ectoplasm from the soil.

They gathered Danny’s ashes and the dust of his crystallized matrix, placing it in a nice urn they’d gotten on the way here. Black with silver etching. Simple and elegant. The two parents left the former grave site of their son with no fanfare.

They had to get their story straight. There were funeral arrangements to be set. Now Danny would get the funeral he deserved. No longer a tortured soul left to linger. He was at peace at least they could give him this final kindness.

He groans, he tried to hang on to the last dregs of unconsciousness. But it’s futile. He cracks one eye open. All he was met with were green swirls and floating purple doors.

Where was this? Who was he? He hyperventilated. What was his name?! He didn’t know own his name!

“Your name is Janus.” Janus? whirled around. There was a strange new blue-skinned ghost in purple hooded purple robes.

“That’s my name? I know you?” Janus (?) took a hesitant step toward the ghost. The ghost nodded.

“Yes, quite. I am Clockwork, Elder Spirit of time. And you, young Janus, are my charge, the current Spirit of Space. You and I will be working together for the foreseeable future.” They smiled warmly, and it was familiar. Janus approached Clockwork less apprehensive. Now that he had a name for both the ghost and for himself.

Janus felt it in his core, it told him the ghost was honest. This ghost was family, his parent.

He winced.

“Why does my core hurt so much?” Janus rubbed at his sternum.

Clockworks hummed, “A tether violently shredded, a core shattered. It left its mark, leaving you as you are now. Fractured, a blank slate.” Clockwork held out their hand. “You need rest, then you must train. Come.”

Janus frowned as Clockwork didn’t elaborate. He took Clockwork’s hand anyway. Janus felt something slot into place in his core.

His body shifted and changed, endless boneless limbs spouted and sinking. Heads countless with everchanging features rolled in and out of the galaxies dancing across his inky skin. Countless eyes blinked all around his form, swimming soothingly along the constantly altering maws along his skin.

Janus felt the loving ticks of his father ripple through his liquid from the contact.

He was beautiful, perfect.

Right.

He trusted and loved Clockwork with everything he was. What came before didn’t matter. All that mattered was the path he and his father forged forward.

#phic phight 2023 #ghost team #blood blossoms #danny phantom

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shadofiredragon · 1 year

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Rules: Make a new post and post your latest line from your WIP and tag as many people as there are words.

I’m FINALLY DOING A TAG GAME?! WHAAA?? Thanks for the tag (and the patience) @000marie198!!!

From LND: He slouched into the lumpy cushion, watching his brother's chest rise and fall in peaceful motions.

(No I will NOT elaborate!)

And now the reason why I procrastinate participating in these games… who the Shell do I tag..? *quickly skims through Tumblr*

Uh, don’t even know if any of you HAVE WIPS- but TOO BAD I NEED PEOPLE TO TAG-!

He @whitecatindisguise (cuz you’re the only other person I’ve actually interacted with on here)

AND ON TO FOLLOWERS-!

slouched @lovelyunknown, into @intoxi-tooned, the @helligmagivoktensworld, lumpy @sairacrystaline, cushion @blobcumulus, watching @kyrjavia, his @jswgamer, brother’s @maxthedrawingperson, chest @lonelyrosemary

Well- that’s embarrassing. I think I ran out. SO ON TO PEOPLE WHO REBLOGGED LND-!!

rise @starrjoy, and @sparklyloverjudge, fall @lucky-oni

(See? This is why I don’t usually do these things… On to the likes of LND!)

in @idk-what-to-call-the-blog, peaceful @staar-sr, motions @sn0wfall-29.

#tag game #FINALLY DONE #Another reason I don’t do these-#it just takes SO MUCH TIME #Everyone I tagged-#I have no idea if you even HAVE your own written WIPS #But if you do- please have fun with this!#and let it remind you to not give up on those ideas!#alright #I’m tired #IM OUT #legends never die

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lovelyunknown · 1 year

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What's this? An intro post?

Hi! I am Em, also known as LovelyUnknown! I use they/she pronouns.

So what do ya do?

I do a fanfiction. I am LovelyUnknown on AO3 and will post here when I publish.

What fandoms do you write for?

Well, I don't have any specialties, but I do have a few that I consistently write for: Gravity Falls (specifically the Transcendence AU), Danny Phantom, Miraculous Ladybug, My Hero Academia, Sonic the Hedgehog (specifically IDW and Movie stuff), and The Dragon Prince. (Expect reblogs that deal with these fandoms, I love my friends stuff.)

Anything else we gotta know?

I have a side blog where I talk about anything outside of fandom. (Be warned that I will post about my religion and philosophy there, so feel free to ignore it.)

My ask box is open to anyone for anything! I love talking to other people on this app.

This is a safe space for minorities of all kinds, if you disrespect my friends, you will be blocked. Don't be an asshole.

#LovelyUnknown.talk #< new personal tag #im actually learning

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marinaiguess · 1 year

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Hey...

You're cool as shit!

oi wtf don't make me emotional 😭

thank you so much ❤️ YOU are COOL!!!!!!

#lovelyunknown #asks answered #wholesome wednesday fr fr #im not even sonic or tails looooooool

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elizabeths-dumbassery · 1 year

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I've finished my research for the character analysis on Whisper the Wolf and wanted to put down some things before its finished

I still need to slap it together and edit it but the entire thing will be simplified into sections with one main post containing all parts. There will be a total of 5.

Introduction to the character

History of character

Characterization in franchise media

How their characteristics resemble real life

What they tell us about the world we live in and the world they live in and how we can relate to it

I'm very excited for this, thanks to @lovelyunknown for absolutely cheering at every corner xD

I don't know if I'll post em all at once or release the sections each day during the span of a week. Either way I'll try my best to do Whisper justice, especially since the next issue comes out while I'm writing the analysis

God I hope this doesn't flop I spent so much research on it :,D

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ghostboidanny · 2 years

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This is OUR hero

Ao3 link

Danny Phantom’s secret identity is a very well kept secret. Not by Danny Fenton, even though he might believe that. Oh no, that boy is awful at keeping secrets. What with yelling “going ghost” in public places and using ghost abilities constantly. But the people of Amity Park … the people are excellent at keeping his secret for him. And they do not like any outsiders trying to hurt their little hero.

A 5+1 story where different Amity Parkers finds out Danny Phantom and Danny Fenton is one and the same and can't do anything to help him. And then one time they can help him.

Prompts by @kinglazrus @ave-aria @q-gorgeous @hauntedchilis @mystyrust LovelyUnknown @apinklion01 @warvikwrites @datawyrms

Chapter 1: Danny sucks at keeping his identity secret for 11000 words

1. Mr Lancer

Lancer was counting his students, all of them huddled in the gym, the buzz of a ghost shield overhead. Most students were shaking, a few were even crying. Ghosts had been attacking Amity for a few months now, the attacks slowly becoming more and more serious. And it hadn’t been until this week that the school finally implemented an evacuation plan. The shield had been installed just days prior.

While he went his rounds, he did his best to comfort students. Offering a kind word here or a pat on the back there. It didn't do much in the great scheme of things but it was something. The only thing he really could do.

None of his schooling had ever prepared him for ghosts, after all.

He reached the last student on his list and his heart sank. One was missing. Daniel Fenton. And all of a sudden he remembered that the boy had requested to go to the bathroom a few minutes before the ghost alarm went off. Was he trapped out there somewhere, hurt and afraid? Before his mind could summon up too many awful images, he came to a decision. He had to find Daniel and bring him safely back here.

"Ms Tetslaff" he called out, gaining her and a few of the students’ attention. "Daniel Fenton is missing so I'll go search for him."

She opened her mouth, as if she wanted to protest, but quickly closed it again. Maybe she realized it would be pointless by the expression on his face. Lancer would find his student and bring him back safely, no matter what anyone said. However, two students did put up a protest. Samantha Manson and Tucker Foley. When they heard his proclamation they hurried over to him.

“Mr Lancer, there’s no need to go search for Danny”, Samantha started. “Since he’s terrified of ghosts he’s really good at hiding whenever one shows up.”

“Yeah!” Tucker agreed. “Even if you go searching for him you most likely won't find him. And his parents are ghosts hunters, he knows how to take care of himself. No need to look for him.”

They did make some good points, in that Lancer had never once been able to find Daniel in the past during a ghost attack. He truly must be good at hiding. Still, he needed to make sure the boy was hiding inside the ghost shield instead. No matter how good he may be, the ghosts only needed to be lucky once and it would be over.

“I’m afraid I can’t let that stop me”, Lancer said. “As your teacher it is my responsibility to keep you safe while in school. Now don’t you worry, I’ll find Mr Fenton and bring him here safely.”

The two children looked at each other, grimacing, but didn’t continue protesting. It was strange, Lancer thought, how the two of them didn’t seem more worried about their friend. But that was something to consider later, after he had found Daniel.

He walked to the open door leading out of the gym and paused there for a second. Green and shimmering the ghost shield stood just before him, and once he stepped through it ghosts would be able to attack him. At least he couldn’t see any down the corridor outside. Not that it meant much when it came to ghosts. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, he forced himself to step through the shield. Since he wasn’t immediately attacked he relaxed a bit, but he still had to keep his guard up while searching for Daniel.

Lancer crept through the empty hallways, peering into classrooms and bathrooms, trying to find any sign of his missing student. Occasionally he would call out Daniel's name, softly, so as to make sure nothing else overheard.

And as he walked the signs of battle were becoming clearer. Overturned trash cans. Papers strewn about. Dents in lockers. And the sound of fighting.

Lancer swallowed, his heart racing in his chest. He wanted to keep a wide berth of the battle, but what if Daniel was caught in the middle of it? What if he needed help? He just … had to check. Then he could run away again.

Closer and closer to the battle he walked until he stood outside the broken doors to the cafeteria. He kept close to the wall and poked his head around the doorway just enough to peek inside.

The cafeteria was a mess. Overturned and broken tables were scattered about. Plates in pieces all over the floor. A few windows had been smashed in. And there was a hole in the floor. He cursed silently. That would cost a lot to repair.

But what really caught his attention was the two ghosts in the room. He immediately recognized Phantom. He was floating in mid air, holding his signature thermos in one hand. On the ground before him stood another ghost, the Lunch Lady, if Lancer remembered correctly. She looked like one at least.

“Meet your cutlery doom!” The Lunch Lady yelled and sent a barge of cutlery towards Phantom, who just barely managed to dodge them in time. But by the end of the barge, the Lunch Lady barely seemed able to fly, her aura dimmed to almost nothing.

“Really cutting to the chase, huh?” Phantom yelled back, a smirk on his lips. “Well, soup can I!” He pointed the thermos at her and turned it on. The other ghost was trapped in the blue beam and was sucked in with an angry scream. He capped the thermos and the silence that followed almost seemed to echo in Lancer’s ears.

"That will be at least a day in the thermos," the ghost boy muttered. He looked around the cafeteria and grimaced. Lancer ducked behind the door to not be seen. "Oof, that's a lot of damage."

The ghost landed, wobbling a bit on his feet. He cursed and pressed a hand against his side. When he pulled it back it was green with ectoplasm. Seemed like he hadn’t managed to dodge all the cutlery after all. "Damn it. This will need stitches."

He sighed and walked over to the server counters, ceramic crunching beneath his feet. He pulled out a bunch of paper towels. Then, a white ring appeared around his waist. Lancer tensed, fearing it was some sort of attack. While Phantom fought off other ghosts, he had done some violent things in the past. The Fentons’ always warned everyone who would listen that even seemingly friendly ghosts only acted that way to manipulate people. They said that all ghosts were malicious and evil in their nature. Lancer found it hard to believe with this particular ghost, but better safe than sorry.

The ring split in two, one traveling up his body and the other down. And wherever the rings passed Phantom … changed. Instead of a black and white body suit, a white t-shirt and blue jeans appeared. Instead of white hair, it turned black. Instead of Phantom, there stood his missing student Daniel Fenton.

Lancer’s mouth dropped open, his eyes bugging out of his skull. His student … was Phantom? His student … was dead?

There was suddenly a lump in his throat and he had to swallow heavily to keep the tears down. Daniel was dead. How? When? Suddenly far too many things about Daniel’s concerning behavior made far too much sense. The way he always disappeared whenever ghosts appeared. The missing homework and assignments, the constant tardiness, falling asleep in class, the grades that had plummeted a few months ago. All of it had started right around when Phantom first started to appear. His student had been dead for months and he hadn't noticed.

The sound of Daniel cursing brought him out of his mind. He peered back into the cafeteria and saw that Daniel had pulled his t-shirt up to study the slash across the ribs, at the same place Phantom had been wounded. Except now he was bleeding red instead of green. A very human color. But on the other hand, Daniel looked very human overall right now. That white ring must have been some sort of shapeshifting power, making him appear human. That would explain why no one had ever figured out they were the same. Though now when he knew, the similarities between ghost and boy were glaring.

“Yeah, this will absolutely need stitches”, Daniel said, sighing as if it was a minor annoyance instead of a serious wound. “Damn it, no way I’ll get it done before school resumes again. I really don’t need Mr Lancer to give me another detention.”

Lancer’s stomach flipped. He had been giving Daniel an awful lot of detention, in hope that it would make the boy change his ways. He had been so clever and hard working at the beginning of the year and it had pained Lancer to see his grades slip. He’d thought that some pushing would turn the trend around. Shame and guilt bubbled up in him. Phantom had been seen fighting ghosts at all hours of the day and night. And on top of all the ghost fights, ghost hunters kept coming after him. His own parents kept hunting him. And Lancer had only made his life harder.

There had to be something he could do to help Daniel. He was just a kid and way in over his head. But as Lancer looked around the wrecked cafeteria and thought back to all the battles he’d seen the boy fight, he had the sour realization that there wasn’t much he could do. He had no idea how to fight ghosts. He didn’t know anything about first aid besides putting a bandaid over a cut. The Great Gatsby, he couldn't even go to the CPS about the abuse Daniel’s parents were subjecting him to, not without outing him as a ghost. There was nothing he could do.

Nothing he could do except …

Lancer snuck back through the school to the gym. The shield had automatically deactivated once the ghosts disappeared and the other teachers had started to corral the students back to their classrooms. He caught sight of Samantha and Tucker whispering to each other. When they saw him they eyed him warily and he did his best to keep his face neutral. At least it seemed Daniel had two loyal friends to help him.

In hindsight it was obvious they were Phantom’s mysterious human helpers that many an Amity Parker had theorized existed but couldn’t confirm. They constantly had an excuse ready as to why Daniel was missing and more than one time they too had been absent during ghost fights, presumably to help their friend fight. It left a sour feeling in Lancer’s stomach to know three teenagers were this city’s first line of defense, but he also had to accept there was nothing he could do about that.

Lancer didn’t say anything to either of them, just collected his class and led them back to the classroom. The students were so used to ghost fights by now, that it only took a couple of minutes before they had calmed down enough that he could continue the lesson.

A few minutes later, the door to the classroom opened and Daniel stuck his head in, a resigned expression on his face. Lancer suppressed a grimace, feeling his shame bubble up again. He nodded at the boy, not stopping his lecture, and felt even more ashamed at how confused but relieved Daniel looked when he wasn’t given detention. He slunk back to his seat, between Tucker and Samantha, who finally relaxed now when their friend had returned safely.

Yes, there wasn’t much Lancer could do to help. Not up against supernatural beings that could tear buildings apart with their bare hands. Not when his student was the only one that could stand up against them.

But at the very least he could make school a little bit easier for him. That, and keep the boys secret safe.

2. The A-listers

“I’m telling you!” Wes yelled and Dash sighed, already annoyed despite the other boy barely having started talking. Next to him Paulina rolled her eyes and started examining her nails, perfect as always. Star and Kwan followed their lead, acting annoyed but indifferent. “Danny Fenton is Phantom! Just listen to the names! Danny Fenton, Danny Phantom, it’s practically the same. And they look the same too, except for the color change!”

Paulina gasped, affronted. She marched up to Wes and pointed one long nail at his nose. Wes immediately shut up, carefully taking a step back. “My darling perfect Phantom doesn't look anything like that little freak Fenton!”

Dash snorted. “Yeah and no way Fentoenail would have the guts to fight anything, let alone a ghost! He screams and runs away when someone as much as mentions ghosts. I wail on him all the time and I tell you, he’s a coward and a weakling. He’s nothing like Phantom.”

Wes swallowed, but that fanatic glow was still shining in his eyes. “I’m telling you, Fenton is Phantom and I’ll prove it to you! I’ll prove it to everyone!”

Dash cracked his knuckles and Wes covered. “If you weren’t a sports bro I’d give you a wailing for saying such things about Phantom. Phantom is a hero, the best hero ever! And I won’t have you compare him to Fentino. Now, scram.”

Wes gave them all a sour look, but did as commanded. He hurried away from them, probably looking for his next victim to ambush with his theory. Paulina snorted, an undignified sound she only made when no one but the A-listers were around, and leaned against Dash.

“What a loser. I can’t believe I almost let him be an A-lister. His whole obsession over Fenton and Phantom is so creepy! Those two are as different as two people can be. Last week he tried to prove it by saying that Phantom only ever appears where Fenton is, which is crazy! Phantom is seen all over town. Like here at school, by the Nasty Burger, the mall and arcade, the old observatory…” her voice grew weaker and weaker until eventually she stopped talking altogether. Dash gave her a confused look. Paulina was frowning, which she almost never did as she claimed it would give her wrinkles.

He had to shake her to break her out of whatever stupe she’d fallen in. She startled and then chuckled, though it sounded forced. “Anyhow, it’s crazy! If nothing else you can’t be dead and alive at the same time.”

“Don’t you remember a few weeks ago?” Star suddenly said, voice serious. She was tapping her finger against her chin in thought. “When we all suddenly got ghost powers for a short while? None of us were dead.”

“T-that doesn't mean anything. It was just a freak one time thing … thing! Don’t say you believe Wes now, Star?”

Star immediately raised her hands and shook her hands. “Of course not! I’m just saying being human and being a ghost at the same time maybe isn’t such an impossible thing. But no way Fenton and Phantom are the same.”

“That’s right!” Paulina said, voice hard as steel. “Let’s forget this foolish thing and just go to class.”

“Yeah, come on”, Dash said. But when he sat in class that day, he kept stealing glances of Fenton, wondering. And based on the way Paulina and the other A-listers did the same, he was sure none of them had forgotten it either.

👻👻👻

The subject wasn’t breached again until a few days later, when the four of them were hanging out together at Paulina’s house. Paulina and Star were doing each other’s nails while they were chatting about what had happened at school and different ghost fights that day. It was in the middle of talking about how handsome Phantom had looked while fighting the technology ghost that Paulina paused.

“Do … do you guys remember what Wes said?” she asked, her voice uncharacteristically weak.

“Wes says a lot of things”, Kwan said.

“The things he said about … Fenton being Phantom”, Paulina clarified. The other A-listers immediately straightened up, staring at her.

“Lina, you don’t believe him, do you?” Star asked.

“No!” she immediately protested, then paused. “Maybe…” when the others all opened their mouths to protest she held up her hands, silencing them. “It's just … the more I think about it the more Wes is right about some things. Like Phantom and Fenton always appearing close to each other. And like Star said, there was that one time we all had ghost powers, and we weren’t dead. So maybe … Fenton is Phantom?”

Kwan shook his head. “But surely his parents would have noticed? They’re ghost hunters! If Fenton is Phantom surely they wouldn’t be constantly hunting him?”

“Lots of parents hurt their kids for less than that”, Dash muttered and Kwan leaned over to put a hand on his shoulder. They all looked at him in sympathy and he shuffled in discomfort. He didn’t want their pity. “Just saying.”

“I know I was the one to say we had ghost powers without being ghosts so technically Danny could have ghost powers”, Star piped up, breaking the tension. “But I was just saying stuff, I didn’t actually believe it.”

“Yeah, but it makes too much sense and Wes has a lot of evidence”, Paulina said. She groaned and was about to bury her hands in her hair before she remembered the wet nail polish and stopped with a jerk.

“Maybe … we can get some evidence”, Star said, looking contemplative.

“What kind of evidence?” Kwan said at the same time as Dash said: “How?”

She bit her lip. “Well … if Fenton really is Phantom, we should be able to catch him in the act. So what if we trap Fenton in something that he can only escape with ghost powers and then film him to see what he does? Dash stuffs him in lockers all the time so we could do that, no one would even think it strange. And then we make sure his friends can’t come save him and put up a camera to film what happens. And boom, we have proof.”

“Star!” Paulina said with a squeal. “You’re a genius! Let's do it. Either we find Fenton really is Phantom or we can put this silly thing behind us forever.”

👻👻👻

It took a couple of days to get it all together and to get an opportunity to corner Fenton alone. The boy seemed to disappear the moment everyone’s back was turned to him and then he’d reappear a bit later without anyone seeing him return. Not to mention that Phantom did show up whenever Fenton was missing. The A-listers were starting to feel more confident about their plan, but also more scared about it. They needed proof, definite proof, one way or the other to finally be able to put this all behind them.

And a week after their talk at Paulina’s house, the plan was in motion. Fenton was alone in the corridor, his friends nowhere to be seen, so Dash marched up to him.

“Fentonio!” He yelled and Fenton startled, jumping high in the air. He swirled around and for a moment Dash could have sworn his eyes were green, then he blinked and they were blue - as they always were.

“H-hello Dash”, Fenton stammered out and backed away as Dash stalked closer. He backed all the way into the lockers and looked like he wanted to back right through them too if he could. “Can we not do this today?”

Dash smirked, though beneath it there was a touch of unease. If Fenton really was Phantom he was about to beat up his hero. “What? Have somewhere to be, freak?”

“Kinda, yeah, not that you would understand.”

“Are you messing with me?” He cracked his knuckles and Fenton cringed at the sound. “You’ll regret that.”

“Now, let's just calm down and let me go for today. I really am in a rush. You can wail on me twice as hard tomorrow if you want.”

“Ha! No way!” He grabbed Fenton by the front of his shirt and lifted him up by it until the shorter boy was forced to stand on his tiptoes or he’d be strangled. “I’m not letting you get away from me today. Into the locker you go.”

“Dash! No wait!” Fenton protested and tried to wriggle out of his grip, but Dash only hauled him up by his arm. He pulled Fenton forward to have room to access the locker behind him - Kwan’s locker to be precise. They had all cleared enough space in their lockers to room the boy so that Dash could put him in whichever was closest. All to make sure he couldn't escape.

He opened it and then pushed Fenton inside, not caring for his loud protests and kicking legs. Though a part of him wondered at Fenton’s restraint. Because if he was Phantom, then he’d seen him kick through metal and brick walls. He could have easily kicked Dash with enough force to break free. Dash certainly would have.

The locker closed, cutting off Fenton’s voice. The moment it closed his friends rushed out from where they’d been hiding around the corner. Opposite the locker they quickly set up a small camera to film whatever would occur. Hopefully, it was small enough that Fenton wouldn’t notice it if he was Phantom.

Once the other A-listers were done they all hurried away from the scene, going to the football field to wait. Dash and Kwan threw a football between each other while Star and Paulina practiced some light cheerleading moves. They waited about an hour before returning to the lockers.

The camera was still there and the girls quickly took it down. Kwan and Dash on the other hand walked over to the locker and opened it. It was empty. Now, that didn’t have to mean anything by itself. Any number of people could have walked by and heard Fenton, therefore helping him out. But it still made Dash’s stomach tingle with excitement and a bit of fear.

The four of them hurried out of school and back to Paulina’s place. Once they had all settled in place so they could see the small screen of the camera, she let it play. They could see themselves standing around the camera before hurrying away. Then, for several minutes nothing happened. Dash started to wiggle in place, feeling inpatient, but Paulina snapped at him to sit still.

Then, as the five minute mark of the video passed, there was a bright flash of light from inside the locker. It blinded the camera for a moment. Once the light died down, a translucent head stuck out through the locker. A moment later the whole body followed suit. Except, they weren’t staring at Fenton, but at Phantom.

Their town’s ghostly superhero landed on his feet in the corridor and stretched out his back with a series of cracks. “Man”, he said, and they startled at his echoing voice. “Those locker’s don’t get any bigger.” He looked at something above the camera and groaned. “Oh no! I’m already late for the meet up with Tucker and Sam. Damn that Dash! Of all days to stick me in a locker he has to choose the day when I have to go to the Far Frozen for an appointment.”

With another groan, he jumped into the air and stayed there, floating, before turning invisible and disappearing.

The video continued playing, showing an empty corridor, but none of the A-listers moved to turn it off. They looked at each other, mouth agape, then turned back to the camera where Phantom … Fenton had disappeared.

“Did that just happen?” Paulina whispered, almost afraid to raise her voice. Afraid of what, she didn’t know.

“Yeah”, Dash breathed, as he felt the same fear. Fenton was Phantom. Wes was right.

They looked at each other for a few more seconds before Star jerked forward, scooping up the camera. Before either of them could protest - not that any of them would - she was deleting the video. Dash shivered, that thing was dangerous. No one else could be allowed to see it. And as they looked at each other, they all silently decided to not say a word.

👻👻👻

The next day at school Dash didn’t search Fenton out to wail at him like he usually did. In fact, he didn’t try to bully any of his usual targets. There was a heavy, sour feeling in his stomach. Phantom was a hero … Fenton was a hero. He had been beating a hero up. And Fenton had never retaliated, despite having the strength to literally throw buses with the same ease Dash threw footballs.

He and the other A-listers were all subdued, and kept glancing at each other. None of them had spoken about yesterday and none could do that now either. Saying it out loud meant acknowledging it. Meant having to face their guilt for all the things they’ve done to their hero.

But then, Wes went up to them. “You have to see this! Once you have, I know you will believe me about Fenton being Phantom.”

Before any of them could say anything, he’d pulled out two photographs. One was of Danny Fenton, the other of Danny Phantom. Both were obviously taken without the boy noticing the photographer, though the Phantom one was much blurrier. Despite that, it was unmistakable now when they knew. The boys in the photographs looked exactly the same except for the color of their hair and eyes. Because they were the same.

Dash and Paulina looked at each other, then at Kwan and Star. Without any of them saying anything they all came to the same decision.

“How dare you compare Fenton to Phantom!” Paulina screeched. “Phantom is perfect in every way and there is no way I’d date that loser Fenton. If you don’t stop this I’ll ruin your social standing - more than you’ve already ruined it yourself, anyhow.”

“Oh lay off, Wes”, Dash said with his best irritated grunt. “Fentonnail looks nothing like Phantom. Phantom is a hero, Fenton is a nobody.” He snatched the photographs from Wes before he could react and crumbled them, not caring for Wes’ protests. “You better stop doing this shit right now or I’ll give you the wailing of a lifetime! “

Star started counting up all sorts of differences between Fenton and Phantom while Kwan stepped up next to Dash to flex his muscles. Wes pailed. “O-okay, fine don’t believe me! One day I’ll prove you wrong!”

Wes turned tail and practically ran away from them, muttering the whole time. Dash relaxed and he could hear someone else sigh. He turned towards the others, sharing a shaky grin with them. None of them had been able to speak about what they saw that day, and none of them really knew how to act around Fenton now that they knew. But this they could do. They could keep their hero’s secret and make his life a little bit easier. It was the least they could do for the many times Fen- Phan- … Danny had saved their lives.

3. Valerie

Valerie ducked beneath a missile fired by Skulker. It hit the tree behind her instead, blowing it to smithereens. Pieces of bark and wood rained down over her. She growled and fired up one of her guns, shooting back. It missed and Skulker gave her a cocky grin, which only made her angrier.

“Need a hand?” a new, far too familiar voice asked from her right. Phantom. The ghost she hated above any other - next to the ghost dog. He had destroyed her life! Val swung her gun around in his direction and fired. Unfortunately, the bastard dodged the shot. At least it made him back away from her, his hands held up in surrender.

“Welp!” Skulker yelled. “Finally you come out to play! I thought I would have to hunt you down. I, the ghost zone's greatest hunter, will defeat you today and take your pelt to hang on my wall!”

“Ugh, that will never not be disgusting”, Phantom said with a shudder. And though Valerie didn’t say anything, silently she agreed. Burning hatred for Phantom or not, when she finally took the ghost down, it would be swiftly. Even though ghosts didn’t feel any pain or other emotions, it would be wrong to drag out the final blow. “Give it up, Skulker, the only thing you can hunt is your own tail!”

“How dare you!” Skulker roared and sent another missile Phantom’s way. He dodged and instead it blew up another tree. In retaliation, Phantom charged up an ecto blast of his own, which hit Skulker’s missile launcher, blowing it to shreds. He growled, even more enraged now. “I will have your head for that!”

“You have to catch me first!” Phantom yelled back, as infuriatingly smug as always. God, Valerie wanted to shoot that look off his face, but out of the two of them, Skulker was the more dangerous enemy to the citizens of Amity Park. She had to focus on him. But once he was gone …

Skulker also seemed to find it infuriating, as he roared and activated several weapons on his suit at the same time. Valerie enjoyed Phantom’s ‘oh shit’ look for a second before the weapons fired. They all flew straight towards Phantom, but they also left Skulker vulnerable.

Valerie used the chance she had been given and fired a series of blasts at Skulker. They hit several more weapons, disabling them, and left a sizable dent in Skulker’s chestplate. Behind her she heard the sound of explosions followed by Phantom screaming out in pain, but didn’t bother turning around. He either made it or he didn’t, either way it didn’t matter to her.

“Stay out of this, little huntress”, Skulker growled and fired a net at her. It caught her board. A moment later electricity coursed through it, and though she was spared, it disabled the board. Her heart jumped into her throat as the board went into free fall.

Luckily, they hadn’t been far above the ground and she could jump into the soft grass. Rolling to diminish the force of impact even more, she only gained bruises from the fall. But as she got up on her knees, another net fell over her. Her arms got tangled and she growled in frustration as she couldn't get free.

Skulker floated down to her with a cruel smirk on his metallic face. He had a gun trained right at her. “Say goodbye.”

“Goodbye”, Phantom said, landing before Valerie and blasting Skulker away. The ghost boy was covered in soot and in several places his suit had been torn, green ectoplasm dripping from wounds. He was favoring one leg over the other.

Blast after blast Phantom sent Skulker’s way, making him take step after step backwards under the immense force. Then, there was a sudden chill in the air and Valerie knew what was about to happen. Ice spread rapidly from Phantom’s feet, covering the grass and reaching Skulker in a matter of seconds. It climbed up Skulker’s body, freezing him in place all the way up to his chest.

Now when the immediate threat was over, Valerie concentrated on cutting herself free of the net. She summoned an ecto knife from her suit and it easily cut through the net. Meanwhile, she could hear Skulker swearing, then the sound of metal tearing. Skulker’s voice abruptly became high pitched and tiny, telling her that Phantom had managed to pull the head off to reach the tiny ghost inside.

“I will get my revenge for this, welp!” Skulker was yelling. “One day I will have your pelt on my wall!

“Yeah, yeah”, Phantom said with a sigh. “Save it for someone who cares.” And then the sound of Phantom's signature thermos activating could be heard, as well as Skulker’s enraged screams. Then silence.

Which meant Valerie now only had seconds to spare before Phantom disappeared. She tore the net off her and summoned an ecto weapon. In front of her, Phantom was panting lightly in a mockery of breath, his hands pressed against his side. Green ectoplasm was leaking through his fingers sluggishly. With a groan he slowly rose into the air.

Valerie grinned in triumph. Phantom’s wounds made him much slower than usual. Rather than disappearing in the blink of an eye, he seemed to have trouble staying afloat at all. He made a pitiful sight. Unfortunately for Phantom, she had no sympathy for ghostly pests.

Taking aim right at his back, Valerie fired. The shot hit bullseye. With a scream, Phantom fell to the ground, a burn on his back already leaking more ectoplasm. He hit the ground with a thud and didn’t get up again.

“Ha! I finally got you!” She yelled and sprang to her feet, hurrying over to Phantom. He might still get away if she didn't hurry and catch him immediately. But as she neared Phantom’s prone form, a white light appeared at his waist. She slowed, fearing this was some new sort of attack, and looked on in wary confusion as the light became a ring around his waist. A ring that split into two, one traveling up his body towards his head and the other towards his feet.

Everywhere the rings traveled, Phantom’s body changed. A white t-shirt and jeans replaced the black and white jumpsuit. Sneakers replaced white boots. And black hair replaced white. Valerie’s heart dropped into her stomach.

That … that was Danny Fenton, who she would recognize anywhere.

Frozen in place, she could only stare at the boy who had replaced the ghost. Danny Fenton and Danny Phantom. Boy and ghost. Friend and enemy. They were one and the same. And she had just shot him in the back.

That last thought finally unfroze her limbs, sending her scrambling forwards. She threw herself to her knees at his side and pulled his shirt up. At his back, right where she’d shot Phantom, was a burn mark, bleeding red.

I shot him, I shot Danny, she thought, feeling as if she was about to throw up. Memories of Dani rose to her mind unbridled. Dani, the halfa. Dani who she and Phantom had saved together, and who had looked so much like Phantom. Hadn’t they called each other cousins? She should have seen it earlier. They were both halfas. And she had just shot him.

Tears blurred her eyesight and she deactivated her helmet to viciously wipe at them. She had no right to cry. Not until she had helped Danny. At least she always carried a first aid bag with her, in case she or any civilian got hurt. She pulled it out, throwing things out wildly until she found the burn cream. She slathered it thickly over Danny’s back and even unconscious his breath hitched in pain.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry”, she repeated, almost like a mantra, as she treated the wound. Once she had covered it in gauze she turned him around, remembering that he’d had more wounds from the fights. The sight of his face made a fresh wave of tears fall down her face. How could she not have seen it before? Danny and Phantom looked exactly alike except for the color change.

Sniffing, she pulled his shirt up and started to clean out the cuts and burns she found all over his chest. Feeling across the ribs, she also feared that a couple of them might be broken, but there was nothing she could do about that. Past observations always showed that Phantom had completely healed from any wounds between battles, so she could only hope that Danny had the same ability to heal even in human form.

The thought to take him to the hospital briefly passed through her mind before she discarded it. If she didn’t want to go to the hospital because she didn’t want to answer any questions about how she got injured, she imagined Danny would want to go to a hospital even less.

Soon enough all wounds she could find had been bandaged. A few had looked deep enough that they might need stitches, which she couldn't do here, out in the open and exposed. She let herself fall backwards into a sitting position, staring at her bloodied hands. Tears landed on them, creating small clean spots.

Danny was Phantom and she had just shot him in the back. She could have killed him. Oh god, what was she going to do now? There was no way he’d forgive her for this! And she wasn't sure she even deserved it. She’d hunted him for months! She’d hurt him countless times!

Was a part of her even more angry now than before? Yes. Danny had dated her despite being Phantom at the time. And he had still played a role in destroying her life, though now she couldn't help but think about all the times he’d tried to explain that the damned dog hadn’t been his.

She … she needed time to think, to process. And before she’d done that she couldn't talk to Danny about this. Not until she knew how she felt.

Looking over his unconscious form, she grimaced. She couldn't leave him like this either.

Slowly, she got back on her feet and walked over to her hoverboard. With her knife she cut the net off and once she’d done that it came back to life. Stepping onto it, she willed it to shift to become bigger; big enough for two people, one sitting down and other lying in their lap. She floated over to Danny and pulled him into her arms. He groaned in pain and she stiffened, afraid he was waking up, but after a few seconds he remained unmoving.

At least it was dark outside, meaning no one would see her flying slowly through Amity towards Fentonworks. Danny remained unconscious the whole way and if it hadn't been for the steady rise and fall of his chest, she would be freaking out. She still was of course, but at least he was alive - kinda. To her relief she discovered that his bedroom window was open upon arrival. Small mercies. She floated through the window and over to his bed. There, she gently laid him down and pulled the covers over him.

She hesitated for a moment, looking down on his unconscious form. His brow was furrowed and sometimes while taking a deep breath, he would grimace as in pain. She pushed his black hair out of his face, smoothing it down, and leaned in to whisper.

“I truly am sorry, Danny. And … once I’m ready I’ll tell you that when you’re awake too.” And with those last words she turned her back on him and disappeared back through the window, her mind whirling.

4. Maddie

Maddie had Phantom in her sights. While she much preferred close range weapons, she knew how to use all of the weapons she and her husband created together. And considering how elusive this one ghost had shown itself prone to be, sometimes subterfuge was necessary. Which is why she was currently hiding behind a couple of bushes late at night, her gun trained right at the ghost.

It was floating on its back a couple of meters in the air, right in the middle of the park. Its ectoplasm green eyes were trained on the cloudless night sky above, trailing them across the stars visible. It reminded her a bit of her son, Danny. He used to always sneak out on cloudless nights to catch a peak of the stars. There had been many times she’d caught him red handed and sent him off to bed. But it had always been with an exaggerated fondness. Her little astronaut, dreaming of the stars. Not like now, when she found him sneaking in and out of the house constantly, cloudless sky or not, and refusing to tell her why.

With a shake of her head, she forced all thoughts of Danny away. She couldn’t allow herself distractions right now. Phantom was before her, not her son, and this might be her one chance to take it down.

She aimed right at the ghost’s back and squeezed the trigger. The shot went off, loud in the still night, and Phantom started to turn towards it, eyes opened wide in faked alarm. Its sudden movement made the shot miss dead center, but it hit the ghost on the shoulder. With a cry meant to imitate a human's cry of pain in an attempt to manipulate her, the ghost dropped from the sky. It landed with a heavy thud on the ground, hand clutching its shoulder. Green ectoplasm was slowly trickling from the wound.

Maddie jumped out of her cover, gun aimed at the ghost’s head. Now she had the opportunity to take it out once and for all. The ghost paled when it caught sight of her.

“M-mom?” It said, its voice perfectly replicating how Danny sounded when afraid. Maddie froze in place, breath caught in her lungs. In that moment Phantom looked eerily like her son. Hurt and bleeding because of her.

A moment later, she shook the nostalgia off. This was not her son. This was a ghost. An imprint of post-human consciousness. It was just trying to imitate her son to manipulate her. Enraged, she raised her gun to fire at it again, but in that moment it turned invisible. Swearing silently, she turned on the special layer in her goggles that made her able to see ghosts even when invisible. But Phantom was still nowhere to be seen. It must have turned intangible and slid into the ground. The ghost was gone.

“Damn it, I was so close!” she swore and her shoulders slumped in defeat. She had allowed herself a moment of weakness, had fallen for its manipulation, and it had allowed it to escape.

Defeated, she decided to call it a night and return home. No way the ghost would allow itself to be caught off guard again anytime soon. But Maddie could be patient. She’d get it next time.

👻👻👻

The next morning Maddie went about her morning routine as she always did. Putting on the coffee, taking a shower, getting dressed and starting on breakfast. Then, once it became clear Danny wasn’t getting up by himself - like usual - she went to wake him up.

Knocking on the door didn't result in any answer but that was normal. She opened the door and walked inside, seeing Danny sleeping on his side. The room was a mess, like normal, and she sighed. But there was one thing in particular that caught her eye. She frowned and walked closer, noticing the corner of a first aid bag sticking out from under the bed. She pulled it out and her heart started beating a bit quicker at just how much of the bandages had been used up.

She and Jack had been concerned for months since Danny had been drawing away from them, staying out late, sneaking out at all hours of the day. And sometimes he’d be injured. But no matter how many times they tried to ask him about it, he refused to answer. They were worried he’d gotten into some sort of trouble, maybe a gang, maybe the bullying had just become worse. Whatever it was, it must be bad to have transformed their happy child into the miserable teenager he now was.

Maddie reached out to shake Danny’s shoulder but jumped back in surprise when Danny woke up with a loud cry. His hand flew to the shoulder she had touched, his whole face scrunching up in pain. As she watched he slowly sat up in bed, winching. He was injured.

“Danny!” she exclaimed, worry lacing thick in her stomach. “You’re hurt! Let me help you!”

She reached out towards him again but stopped when he flinched away from her, a look of fear on his face. Hurt joined the worry in her stomach, making her feel sick. He didn’t trust her, he seemed afraid of her.

“I’m fine!” Danny said in a high pitched voice, clearly lying. “Perfectly peachy.”

“Danny”, she said in her disappointed mom voice. He grimaced but only insisted again that he was fine. Maddie sighed. “If you don’t want to tell me you don’t have to, but just … please try to be more careful in the future?”

The look he gave her was sour, so much so that she wanted to reprimand him for it, but he was obviously in pain right now so she’d let it slide. “I’ll try.” Under his breath, so quiet she barely heard him, he said, “I’ll dodge next time.”

“Well, go get gleaned up and come down for breakfast. And better hurry with it or you’ll be late for school.” Danny nodded and she left his room to give him privacy. Though she couldn’t help worrying about his wound.

How had he gotten hurt? And so bad he needed bandages? Why did he not want to talk to her or Jack about it? It just didn’t make any sense!

She sat down at the dinner table, taking a deep sip from her cup. As she did, unbridled the memory of last night popped into her head. You shot Phantom in that same shoulder, a voice whispered in the back of her head. She frowned and shook her head to dispel the thought. What did it matter if Phantom got hurt in the same shoulder as Danny? That had nothing to do with each other. Must be her mind playing tricks on her since Phantom calling her mom had thrown her off her game.

👻👻👻

The next clue she didn’t see in person, but on the news. Lance Thunder was reporting on the most recent ghost fight. It’s a rerun from earlier that day, or she and Jack would already be on the way to the scene to fight the ghost themselves.

It was a fight between Phantom and that technology ghost that causes so many problems for the city. In both property damage and in the amount of blackouts it has caused. As usual, Phantom arrived only moments after the ghost appeared. Maddie and Jack had built more and more sophisticated systems for detecting ghosts and had made the Fenton Assault VehicleTM faster and yet they always appear minutes after Phantom. Even the other ghost hunter, the Red Huntress, was usually faster than them. Though at least the GIW were the slowest of them all to appear. Still, it was infuriating that a ghost was better at ghost hunting than them.

As usual, Phantom was also very quick at dealing with the ghost. Jack and Maddie didn’t get there until the fight was already over. Lance Thunder catching the fight on camera was pure luck, as usually he too is too late to the scene. Apparently he and his crew had already been nearby to film something else when the ghosts appeared.

At least it gave Maddie a chance to observe the ghosts, to try and gauge any weaknesses from the footage.

The fight was fast and Phantom threw around its usual infuriating quips. Within ten minutes the ghost was defeated, though she couldn’t really tell how Phantom had defeated the technology ghost. One minute they had been exchanging blows, the technology ghost seeming to have the upper hand, and the next all the electronics it was using had just stopped working. But she guessed it was too much to ask for a ghost - non-sentient as they were - to have any sort of finesse while controlling items.

Phantom had come out victorious, though with a big gash across its shin, dripping ectoplasm in a steady stream down on the ground. As usual, within moments of it having sucked the other ghost into its stolen Fenton thermos, Phantom disappeared. When she and Jack had appeared at the scene moments later, it was gone without a trace.

Truly infuriating that, Phantom’s ability to go up in smoke. None of the other ghosts shared that ability and they couldn’t figure out how it did it.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the front door opening. She turned around and saw Danny walk into the house. She smiled at him but didn’t get one in return. Instead Danny frowned at her before looking away.

Not letting that deter her, she started up a conversation. “How was school, darling?”

“Good”, Danny mumbled, not meeting her eyes.

“You didn’t get another detention, did you?” she asked, her tone sharper. He’d gotten far too many of those lately and despite the number of groundings they had given him, nothing seemed to help.

“No, not today. Everything was fine.” He still wasn’t looking at her though and before she could say anything else he turned and walked towards the kitchen, probably to get a snack. As he walked, she noticed that he was limping. Her heart sank into her stomach. He was injured again. But, considering how he responded every time she asked about his health, she knew he would deny being hurt if she brought it up.

Sighing, she watched him limp away before turning to the TV again. It was showing the best moments from the fight, including the moment Phantom floated victorious over its fallen opponent. Her eye caught on its injured leg. The same leg Danny had been favoring.

Another injury shared between Danny and Phantom. But no … no, it was just a coincidence. A ghost couldn't be human and a human couldn't be a ghost. It was literally impossible, as ectoplasm couldn't coexist with living material. If she so much as mentioned such a possibility to any other ghost hunter they’d laugh in her face. The time the students of Casper High momentarily gained ghost powers had been a fluke. A one time thing caused by a ghost infecting them with ectoplasm. It would have eventually killed the students if they hadn’t been cured. If Danny was Phantom he would have to be dead and her son was not dead.

Danny could not be Phantom.

But despite that thought, she couldn’t help but notice a very worrisome pattern. Almost obsessively, she started to watch all new battles Phantom engaged in. Not to find a weakness - even if she told Jack that was why she was doing it, as she was not ready to admit even to him what she had started to suspect deep down - but to see where and how he - it - had been wounded. Then she would compare it with Danny.

The picture it painted was damning. The small wounds - tiny cuts and bruises - she could not find on her son’s body. But the big ones? The big ones were there. Danny would limp when Phantom injured a leg. He’d wince when she hugged him if Phantom got a hit to the ribs. He’d shy away from shoulder pats if Phantom had taken a blast to them.

Danny kept getting injured in the same places Phantom got injured.

Maddie didn’t know what to think. Her mind felt scrambled, as if someone had put her brain through a mixer. She didn’t know what to do, especially since Danny refused to talk to her, would barely even look at her.

She just … had to know.

👻👻👻

It was the middle of the night when Maddie peeked into Danny’s room. She sighed soundlessly at finding him in bed, sleeping, for once. At least he was here, safe, right now.

She sneaked into the room on silent feet, tiptoeing over dirty clothes, schoolbooks and a random plate lying on his floor. Right up to his bed she sneaked. Danny was lying on his stomach, something she knew he usually never did. But she also remembered Phantom earlier that evening getting knocked back first into the ground with such force it created quite a sizable crater. If her earlier observations held true, Danny was sleeping on his stomach because he had hurt his back.

Usually, she would have confirmed the latest injury already, while he was awake. It was quite easy to sneak in a pat down disguised as a motherly pat on the back. But this last week Danny had started to avoid all touch, from both her and Jack. She had a sinking feeling it was because all her touches had hurt him lately.

But it left her with no choice, even if it made her feel creepy. She had to check if he was injured while he was asleep.

Inch by inch she peeled back the comforter to expose Danny’s pajama clad body. Halfway through the motion, she froze, as Danny mumbled something and shifted. After a few seconds though, he stilled again. At least she could pretend she was putting the comforter back if he woke and noticed her here.

Eventually, the comforter was pulled back far enough and she left it to pool by Danny’s hips. She grabbed hold of the bottom of the pajama shirt and was about to pull it up when Danny shifted in his sleep again. A whine left his lips and then something that sounded like a choked off sob.

Once again, Danny settled down after a few seconds and she started to pull the shirt up. A white bandage came into sight, wrapped around Danny’s back. She pulled the shirt up further and saw that the bandage extended across his whole ribcage. In one place at the dead center of his back, the bandages even had a dark spot. Blood. Sighing warily, she started to pull his shirt back again, now when she had confirmed that Danny once again was injured in the same place as Phantom had been that day.

Before she could though, Danny started to whimper and then to speak. Frozen in place, she could only listen and hope she hadn’t woken him.

“No”, he mumbled, so quiet she could barely hear him over the beating of her own heart. “P-please no… don’t hurt me.”

Maddie felt like crying. She didn’t know why Danny kept getting hurt, but she suspected Phantom had somehow created a bond between itself and her son. Maybe the ghost transferred the wound to her son. Either way, she hated herself for failing to protect Danny. She should probably wake him up, free him from his terrible nightmare. But she hesitated. If she listened in, maybe Danny would reveal what was troubling him. Considering he was so tight lipped while awake it might be her only chance to figure it out.

“P-please, I’m still your son”, Danny begged and Maddie’s blood froze to ice in her veins. What? “I p-promise, I’m still Danny. No! Don’t hurt me, mom! I’m still Danny!”

It felt like a ghost had reached intangibly through her chest and ripped her lungs out. She just couldn't seem to breathe properly. Tears started dripping down her face. Danny, her baby boy, was afraid of her. She had never before felt more like a huge failure of a parent. Her dad had raised her with the idea that fearing and respecting him was more important than trust and love and she had promised herself to do better. And yet here she was, listening to her son having a nightmare about her hurting him.

She just… had no idea what could have caused her son to have so little trust in her. To fear her.

"Mom, no! I'm still human! I'm only half ghost! P-please don't dissect me! I'm still me!"

She gasped, horror freezing the blood in her veins into ice. Half ghost. What did that mean? It was impossible to be half ghost. Except … those kids did have ghost powers for a while. And ever since Danny got into that accident with the portal she and Jack had known he was a bit ecto contaminated. A human could have some ectoplasm in them.

And … The memory arose of Phantom floating on his back, admiring the stars. So much like Danny lying on his back on the roof, admiring the stars. Phantom spotting her and calling her mom, looking and sounding so much like Danny that she’d frozen in place.

Phantom getting injured in the shoulder, Danny having a wound on his shoulder too. She looked down at his back and the huge bandage that covered it. Hadn’t she snuck in here tonight because she wanted to confirm if Phantom’s latest injury had been transferred to Danny or not? Had she not started to see more and more connections between the ghost and her son?

Half ghost, half human. Phantom wasn't transferring it’s- his injuries to Danny. Phantom was Danny.

It must have been the portal accident. There was no other explanation. Her baby had died - half died? - and she hadn't known. And Danny hadn’t trusted her enough to tell her. Instead, he feared her. Feared what she would do to him if she found out. Dissect rang through her head and she had to bite back a sob. Worst thing was that she couldn't even deny that Danny hadn’t had anything to fear. If she just a few hours earlier had gotten her hands on Phantom she would have dissected i- him. She had told Danny to his face that she wanted to dissect him.

She was the worst mother ever. And now she was too much of a coward to even reach out and wake Danny from his nightmare. Because … what if he woke up and was still afraid of her? What if he woke up and got more afraid than he’d been while having a nightmare?

Suddenly, she couldn't stand to be in here any longer, listening to her son having a nightmare about her hurting him. Gently as she could in her hurry to get out of here, she pulled his pajama top back into place and placed his comforter over his body again. Then she snuck out of the room, closing the door behind her.

She couldn't return to her and Jack’s bedroom. He was sleeping peacefully in there, unaware that her whole life had been turned on its head in a matter of seconds. Instead she stumbled down the stairs into the living room and curled up on the couch. She pulled a blanket over her, trying to stop the chills that made her whole body shake. Or maybe it was the sobs that made her shake.

Maddie didn’t know what to do. Her son was afraid of her. She knew she had to do something to make him not afraid of her again, but she didn't know what or how. If she just outright asked him about this she feared it would just make him spiral, make him more afraid of her.

And Jack! She had to tell him, but how? They had been abusing their son, she knew it would absolutely crush him to find out. Jack loved his children, he would hate himself for hurting them.

Well, one thing was clear at least. She would stop hunting Phantom. She would never again make a weapon that could hurt her son, never again make any indication that she even wanted to hurt him. She would make herself into a person Danny could trust again, until he felt safe enough to tell her himself. And if he didn’t trust her … then she would accept that too.

5. Literally just … so many people

“I’m going ghost!” could be heard echoing through the mall and the dozen of people who had hidden away behind the counter in the food mall peered over said counter as a flash of bright white light almost blinded them. In front of them were Danny Fenton, the ghost hunters’ son. There was a bright white ring around his waist. The ring split into two and one traveled up his body, the other down. Wherever they went they transformed the boy, turning him into Danny Phantom, the resident town hero.

The boy? Ghost? The ghost boy jumped into the air and flew towards the other ghost in the mall, a huge ghost bunny. Meanwhile, the people behind the counter slowly slid back down under cover. They all looked at each other in shock.

“Danny Phantom is … alive? And he’s Danny Fenton, the son of our ghost hunters?” One brave soul said, the others nodded numbly. “We … we can’t tell anyone about this ever, can we?” They all shock their heads in silent agreement. “Alright … let's try and forget that ever happened.”

So when the fight ended and Danny Phantom turned into Danny Fenton with another bright flash, the people behind the counter stayed huddled there for another few minutes until the boy had left. Silently, they climbed out of their hiding place and went about their day. Though the next time each person who had been present saw their hero, they yelled an encouraging word or two at him. The painfully young boy looked at them in surprise before a happy grin spread over his face.

👻👻👻

Lance Thunder was smoothing down his hair, anxiously looking towards the ghost current wreaking havoc a couple of meters from them. It was that technology ghost. Tetanus or something. He glanced at the camera. “Are we live yet?”

“Not yet, we’re having some technological problems”, his camera man reported back and fiddled with the settings on the camera he carried.

“Alright, let me know when we start, I always embarrass myself in front of the camera because you never warn me. I swear, sometimes I wonder if you want to em-”

“I’m going ghost!” The loud yell interrupted Lance mid sentence and he turned, annoyed, to see who it was. It was Daniel Fenton, those dreadful ghost hunters’ son. He stood in an alley a few meters from them, his back to them. His arms were raised above his head and with a bright flash a white ring appeared around his waist. It moved across his body, revealing a black and white hazmat suit. In just a few seconds Danny Phantom, town hero, had taken the boy’s place.

A second later, Phantom was flying towards the ghost in the distance, yelling out a taunt and hitting it in the face. Lance was left staring in shock over what he’d just seen. The ghost hunters’ son was a ghost. Their hero was a teenager who was hunted by his own parents. And the whole town, Lance included, had at least at one point been hostile towards him. A teenager. A child.

Abruptly, he remembered the camera. The cameraman’s mouth had also fallen open in shock. “Please tell me you didn't catch that on live video”, Lance all but begged.

The cameraman shook himself and then the same fear Lance felt entered his eyes. He turned towards the camera and examined it for an agonizing few seconds before breathing out in relief. “No, we’re still having problems connecting to the network.”

Lance sagged against the brick wall he was hiding behind. “Thank God! There’s no way his parents wouldn’t have found out if it’d been sent live and I don’t want to be the one responsible for Phantom getting dissected - or is it vivisected? - by them.” He sent a hard glare at his cameraman. “We keep quiet about this, you hear me?”

“Loud and clear!” the cameraman squeaked.

A moment later the camera finally came to life and Lance Thunder smoothed his hair into place with a big smile, starting his reporting. No mention of Phantom being alive was made that day.

👻👻👻

Police officer Jason Bergstrom sighed and massaged his temples. “Sir”, he called out as his captain walked past his station. The older man paused, and even before Jason had said anything, his face was morphing into an expression of exasperation. “Another traffic camera caught Fenton transforming on tape.”

The captain sighed. “God damn it. Yo, Carl!” he called out and the other police officer looked up from his computer. “He got caught again.”

Carl groaned and reluctantly got up from his seat to walk over to the wall. There hung a small whiteboard. On the top it said “days since our last incident” and beneath it was a big three. Carl erased the three and wrote down a zero instead. More police officers had noticed the comotion and a few bills of money exchanged hands. Most just looked exhausted though.

The captain turned back to Jason. “Any signs of injuries?”

“Not what I could tell, but the video is dark and from far away. At least he wasn’t limping or showing any obvious signs of injury. Doesn't say much, considering how good he appears to be at hiding injuries.”

“Alright, well you know what to do.”

Jason nodded and turned back to the computer to delete the footage. When he became a police officer he had not imagined he’d be spending most of his day looking over the city’s video footage. Not for any signs of crime - those were rare outside of ghost related ones - but for any camera that might have caught the resident ghost hunters' son on tape transforming into the town's ghostly superhero.

“Are you sure there isn’t anything more we can do for the boy?” Carl asked.

“We’ve been over this already”, the captain said. “Ghosts don’t have any legal rights, meaning if we went to the government with our concerns they’d take the boy away for experimentation. The only thing we can do is send child protective services the Fentons’ way, but considering they keep returning without any incidents to report despite we all knowing that house is one huge OSHA violation, the kid must be overshadowing the workers to turn them away. So unless you wanna be the one responsible for a 14 year old boy getting tortured there isn’t much we can do besides this.”

Carl sagged in place, and some of the other officers did too. It was a topic that often came up for debate in the department. Especially after big battles when the boy was obviously injured or when his parents had been spotted shooting at him. And each time the captain reminded them that they did not have the law at their side in this case.

All Jason and the others could do was delete any evidence they had to keep it out of the government's hands and try to make the boy’s life a little bit easier without having him find out they were doing anything at all. Credible deniability and all that. Still, it rankled on them all.

#dp #danny fenton #danny phantom #mr lancer #valerie gray #maddie fenton #dash baxter #paulina sanchez #identity reveal #violence cw #injury cw #phic phight #phic phight 2022 #indrel writes

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phantomphangphucker · 24 days

Text

Phic Phight - The Little Toaster Who Could, Is An Asshole

@lovelyunknown @princessfanonanona @fangirlwriting-stories @fentoaster @axion-labs @turtlesnails @littlebadger

Toaster powers go! Terrorise the half-dead teen that hates toast! He deserves it! According to Wes at least.

Wes glares at Danny, Danny stares back in unbridled glee.

Wes flips him off, Danny flips him off right back… before doing double finger guns and sticking out his tongue.

Wes slams down the notebook he’d been using in an attempt to ‘write down’ his ‘proof’, not that written shit counted for shit with any of this shit, pointing aggressively at Danny; Danny points at himself too just very mockingly.

“Would you two stop making all my staff laugh? They have jobs to do and you’re half way to me just kicking you out”.

Wes rounds on the manager or owner lady, “but he is dead! He threw eggs at me! Invisible eggs!”.

Danny’s grin from the front doorway is a bit manic, “where would I even get invisible eggs! Huh Wes! Ever think about that one!”.

“Fuck you!”.

“Fuck yourself!”.

“You dated a damn harpy!”.

“Are you saying I unalived my own eggs!”.

“Why are you censoring yourself!”.

“Because you’re a weak little baby boy bitch!”.

“We are the SAME AGE!”.

“Say that to time daddy’s face! I dare you!”.

The owner lady throws her hands up, snapping, “out! Get out!”, at Wes.

Wes looks afronted, because he is, “what? Just me?!”, gesturing at Danny aggressively, “him????”.

She sighs, “he’s not actually inside my store, you are. Out”. She’s thankfully when Wes actually leaves, even if the teen hurls his ‘research’ at the Fenton boy first and runs after the Fenton kid when said Fenton starts sticking the notebook in his mouth and shaking his head back and forth like a feral dog.

There was something very wrong with both of those boys. Something very very wrong. The Fenton boy was definitely not dead though, that would be far too normal for a Fenton so unhinged.

Wes grabs the end of his notebook, Danny does not stop shaking his head though, resulting in Wes’s lanky ass getting flung and smacked around. Danny intentionally makes his mouth frothy for added rabies effect. Making Wes have to shake off, and pull a tooth out of, his notebook once he does successfully rip it out of Danny’s mouth. “Your existence is a crime and affront to god”.

Danny open mouth grins cheerily, “I thought I already established that the day I was reborn into death”.

Wes immediately writes that ‘quote’ down in his book.

Danny stares judgingly, “are you writing all my word weavy bullshit down? Really? That’s kinda sad, man”.

Wes scowls back, “that’s the thirty-second different way you’ve described being dead, one day that will add up and people won’t be able to deny me”.

“You’re gonna be great for my Wikipedia article one day, when you work for me as my maid”.

“Fuck you”.

“It’s still easier for you to fuck yourself you know”.

Wes tackles him, “oh how I wish someone else had to see you and your bullshit!”.

Danny scowls with feeling, slapping Wes a couple of times as they roll around on the ground getting muddy as fuck since it was raining out, “why would you say that! The curs-ed word! Banishment to the sinner! Boo!”.

“BOO YOURSELF!”.

“HOW DARE YOU! THAT’S MY LINE!”.

“YOU STARTED IT, I’LL FINISH IT!”.

“YOU CAN’T FINISH THE EXISTENCE OF A PHRASE YOU DIPSHIT!”.

“JUST LIKE YOU COULDN'T FINISH OFF YOURSELF PROPERLY!”.

Danny snarls, “I’m going to break you like a toothpick”, and pins Wes down using more arms than humanly possible.

Wes wishes he had his camera.

Wes does not have his camera.

At least Danny’s stupid ass ain’t heavy enough to break his ribs. “You weigh less than a bag of potatoes, go ahead and try”.

Now if Wes was a ghost, and thus could just reform a torn off limb, Danny would actually break his arm. But Wes is human and thus can’t do that. Meaning Danny can’t do that to him. Oh the woes of being morally in the right. If Wes were Vlad and a billionaire then Danny’d just burn down his house in recompense. Is he mentally using the word wildly wrong? Mostly likely, shut up Jazz.

Besides, Vlad would take the arson as a compliment and praise him.

Wes huffs, tired, “are you going to clean me off or not?”. Danny smirks and turns the teen intangible, all the muck falling through the teen… as well as all of his clothing except his underwear. Danny running off immediately while sticking his tongue out and cackling; all while Wes is scrambling up off the ground, wadding his re-soaked muddy clothes up, and hurling them after Danny.

They nail Danny in the head, making the stupid half-ghost face-plant into a streetlight. Wes shouting, “HA!”.

But Danny scrambles up himself, grabs the clothing, and holds them above his head, “mine now bitch! THE SPOILS OF WAR BELONG TO THE VICTOR!”.

Leaving Wes huffing, panting, by himself, slowly realizing that now he has to walk home muddy and practically naked… “Zone DAMN IT PHANTOM!”.

Danny, in distance, can be heard shouting, “GET WRECKED!”, by more than a handful of people. Everyone and their mother knowing that means the Fenton and Weston kids had gone at it again.

Danny floats down through the rarely used ‘attic’ grinning to himself, he felt like he accomplished a lot today. Looking around for an empty box, he is absolutely packaging up Wes’s clothes -without washing them- and mailing them through the post back to him. They were gonna be rank when the guy opened it up. Ha! What fun!

Transforming back as he finds a suitable box and some packing tape; dropping the clothing in unceremoniously with a feral grin.

Unfortunately it looks like today’s tomfuckery wasn’t quite done with him, as a voice he’s never heard (he thinks) shouts, “oh what the freshy fruity fuck!”.

Danny jumping up and spinning around, right, fuck, Wes saying a stupid wish. Fucking asshole! He should know better! And of course Danny would have been too distracted tormenting Wes to have noticed his ghost sense going off. Ancients end him entirely.

Thing is though? There’s no one. Like, actually no one, “what the?”. Oh is someone spying on him again? Someone who’s not Vlad?

And whom probably doesn’t have positive-ish motives for it?

That would be his luck after all.

The voice pipes back up again, “how the Hell do I! Me! Find this massive crap out! Are you always so pissy wissy with your shitty shit!”.

Danny starts pushing stuff around to figure out where the Zone the Voice is coming from.

It’s…

It’s a fucking toaster???

A TOASTER?????

The toaster seems disgruntled, the toaster flings itself at Danny’s face.

Danny promptly swats it into a wall.

Why is a toaster talking to him? How is a toaster talking to him? It attacked him! Sure that last part wasn’t super weird since Technus assaulted him with random appliances all the time, but still.

“Oh cool, a wall, as if being a toaster wasn’t hard enough”.

“Why are you talking?! How!”.

The toaster flops from side to side in a weird version of walking at Danny vaguely aggressively, “oh you know, only your happy pappy toasterifying me for the fuckin’ lolly lols or some somersault shit”, it uses its cord to throw a picture frame vaguely in Danny’s direction. Apparently the toaster had some pent up rage.

Fair.

So did Danny.

Danny side steps the picture frame, “and when did he do this? How even? You are like a whole ass person in there?”.

The toaster seems infuriated, slapping its cord around, “of course I am, numbnuts! I wasn’t born as no tinker toy bullshit! Who the fuck would give birth to a toaster!”, the toaster spits toast at him.

Danny is highly offended. He really hates toast.

Like if the universe had created one true evil it would be in the form of toast and only toast. Always toast. “Don’t spit toast at me! You absolute heathen!”.

“I’ll spit what I diddly darn wanna! Fuck you! I’m your upperclassman any ways, Fenton! So deally wheelly!”.

Oh ancients his dad turned one of his classmates into a fucking toaster. A toaster that’s spitting more roasted toast at him likely out of spite. Danny impales a piece into the wall with an ice spear.

The toaster snares, “don’t abuse my creations!”.

“Like Hell I won’t! Fuck toast!”, Danny tries tackling the toaster, it uses its cord to grab on to a lamp and effectively flee from Danny’s would be constrictive grasp. Danny shouting, “do you want to be detoasted or not!”.

“Oh it’s too late for that, you douchey canoey! Your poopy poppy sold that ‘ish to a Cullen Family wannabe actor with rich sauce for flavouring!”

Fucking Vlad! Ancients. Danny swears that, the sometimes vaguely evil, ‘mentor’/‘uncle’ of his gets into more weird shit than Danny did. And Danny’s the one who more or less infected an entire town with death, so that’s a feat and a half. Danny grinning, “I know that cash money bitch, I can take you there if you!”, another piece of toast is fired off, “just!”, more toast spit, “stop!”, again! Toast!, “assaulting!”, more toast, “me!”, you guessed it! Toast, “with!”, annnnnnd TOAST, “toast!”.

The toaster growls, it sounds like the metal shit inside it is clanging around violently, but Danny does manage to tackle it and walk through the attic wall all while holding it at arms length like it’s a bomb.

More than a couple people see the Fenton boy just… walking down the street screaming shrieking practically incoherently at a toaster he’s holding as far away from himself as possible; the toaster is firing toast haphazardly into the air and shaking wildly every so often… as if there’s some kind of demonic possession fuelled conversation going on.

Absolutely no one approaches to ask. And that was only partly because a random construction worker got thrown by the toaster cord at one point.

One person did shout, “watcha got there?!?”, at the teen though. Who had just responded with, “A SMOOTHIE! AN ANGRY TOAST SMOOTHIE!”.

Wes saw a video of it, Wes cackled meanly. He might have had an embarrassing walk home but at least he had a new phone background photo.

Danny hurls the toaster at the door in lieu of knocking, at least his coordination does not suck and he catches the toaster as it bounces back at him. The toaster shrieking, “I will bake you like a crispy spaghetti bolognese!”.

“Are you a fucking toaster or an oven!”.

“I’m a McHeaty McMaddy bitch either way!”.

Vlad opens the door with, “‘Maddie’?”, he is clearly extremely confused.

Danny grumbling, figures, “of course you heard the ‘maddy’ part and no not mom, this thing just speaks like a fucking lunatic”, and practically shoves the toaster at Vlad’s chest, “here, I… I need your help. I have a sentient toaster, that knows I’m vaguely dead-ish, ‘cause I do not look out for fucking toasters when transforming and shit”.

The toaster vibrates against Vlad’s chest and fancy suit, “then you’re a stupidy stopidy bibidy bopidy fool!”. Vlad looks offended.

Fucking good, honestly. Danny huffing and continuing like he hadn’t been interrupted, “and apparently Jack toasterified this toaster that used to not be a toaster and instead be a person, and apparently mailed a ‘Cullen Family actor wannabe with rich sauce for flavouring’ -which must be you- the invention dad did this with because he no longer, and I quote, ‘trusty-wustied him selfie-welfie’. Please tell me you have more tolerance for toaster spit than I do”.

Vlad sighs heavily, it’s both fond and annoyed. The man lets him and the toaster in at least.

Of course then the toaster instantly flees from his grasp. Like a dick.

Both him and Vlad just watch the thing fling itself around the mansion with its cord and ‘feet’. Vlad blinking, “this is somehow the strangest thing I’ve ever had to help you with”.

“I know right?”.

…”why is it a toaster?”, the toaster attempts to toast some of Vlad‘s paperwork, it unfortunately works. “I’ll admit to not believing that odd letter Jack sent about making a teenage toaster, I regret that decision deeply”.

“That’s fair”.

They both have to rush to put out the fire the toaster’s started, Danny shouting, “there is something seriously wrong with you!”.

“I’VE BEEN A TOASTER FOR A YEAR! HOW WOULD YOU FUCKY WHUCKY FEELY ABOUT THAT!”.

Danny nods acceptingly while chasing the thing, “I’d cry”. It’s true. He would.

Vlad actually laughs while helping with the chase, “yes the horror of being something that near exclusively creates your one true hate and fear”.

“Says the alcoholic!”.

“I thought you liked drinking with me?”.

Danny stops and shrugs at the man, “I mean yeah, but you kinda got a bit of an issue that we should probably sort out some day”, eyeing the toaster sucking in one of the portraits Vlad had done of them together. Vlad was going to kill this toaster at this rate, and fuck Danny might let him. “Preferably not now though, Sweet Ancients”.

Vlad hits the toaster with a broom, “bad! No! You spit that out right now!”.

“It’s not a cat, Vlad”.

“Well then it should not behave like one”.

The toaster escapes from the broom, knocking over a fancy glass top table shaped like a jaguar.

Danny grumbling and slipping on some glass, “at least it can’t vomit a painting up like a fucking hairball!”.

“I would absolutely make you clean that up, consider it a lesson on responsibility”.

“I do enough chores at home, Vladdie!”.

“And how many times have I offered to come and help?”.

“And how many times have I told you the labs too dangerous?”. Danny glares at the toaster as it bounces up and down on a fancy keurig, “hey! Leave the superior appliance alone!”. The coffee machine blows up.

“Die coffeefee!”

Oh yeah, fuck this toaster majorly. It spits more toast at Danny as if hearing his mental insult.

Vlad rolls up his sleeves, hands glowing some and stalking ominous after the feral machine. Danny throwing a pillow at him and at the toaster, a couple cat toys going sailing as well; one goes right into the toaster even. “Don’t actually kill it! That’s a person! Unfortunately!”.

“Y’all couldn’t killy billy me even if ya tried anyway!”.

“Do you want to die!”.

Vlad frowns at Danny, “somethings do, in fact, deserve to die. This is one of them”.

“No!”.

Ah say hello to the one thing neither of them can ever actually agree upon. Meanwhile the fucking toaster jingles, cat toy must have had a bell on it then.

Maddie the cat comes out of nowhere and bodily tackles the toaster, batting at it wildly.

She desires her toy. It has her toy. It will now be her toy!

The toaster shrieks and waddles away on its ‘feet’ rapidly, Maddie the cat smacking the ground after it trying to attack its cord, butt wiggling and paws flailing.

Vlad looks incredibly proud, “atta girl, Maddie”. Hell, even Danny’s incredibly proud, what a good cat. Fluffy and ferocious.

Vlad absolutely punts the toaster into the corner of wall mounted oil candle when it tries to shoot Maddie the cat with toast. Snarling, “I will end you”. Unfortunately he’s not quick enough with the ecto-blast to even singe the thing. It was one fast toaster.

Danny putting his hands on his knees and wheezing, toaster assaulting the chandelier, “how, how are we, getting the runaround, by a, by a fucking, toaster?”.

Vlad huffing with his hands on his hips, “when is anything your father messes with easy to resolve?”.

“Never?”.

“That’s what I thought”.

“Fuck, you”.

“I love you too Daniel”.

“Ancients you are, a weird uncle”.

“And you’re a weird godson”.

Which was probably the only reason this mentorship shit even worked at all. Both of them were way too fucking weird. Everything around them was always way too fucking weird.

Case and point?

The toaster managed to unhook the chandelier, which has now crashed down to the ground in a hail of tiny expensive diamonds.

But Maddie the cat is on a mission. A mission that shall not be deterred by any mess or wonton destruction. She bites the toasters cord and flings it around wildly like it’s a mouse she’s playing with.

A mouse she will keep playing with until it dies and stops moving.

She flings it up in the air and catches it by the cord again, regardless of the toaster trying to avoid that. “MAKE THE BATTY’S CATTY STOP!”.

“No”.

“Naw”.

To be fair, it was kind of hilarious. And Vlad and Danny were telekinetically moving anything sharp out of Maddie the cat’s way so she wouldn’t get hurt while she had her fun.

“Maybe I like being a toaster! Ever think about that!”

Both Vlad and Danny give simultaneous deadpanned, “why?”’s.

Maddie the cat flops herself on the toaster body, its cord still in her mouth, as she purrs happily and swishes her tail around lazily. She doesn’t look like she has any intention of releasing the toaster.

So the two halfa’s walk over and stare down at the toaster. The toaster pipes up dejectedly, “okay maybe that was a lie. I am angry and touch starved”.

“Fuckin’ mood”.

“That I can understand, to a degree”.

Danny and Vlad eye each other before both chuckling fondly.

“…help?”.

Maddie the cat purrs loudly.

Vlad smirks down at the thing, “oh I don’t know about that, Maddie looks quite content were she is”.

“I concur”.

Vlad blinks and grins wide, “glad to see your vocabularies improved”.

“You hired me a tutor, how couldn’t it?”.

“Money well spent, then”.

“HELLO! You CUCKY DUCKY’S gonna HELP!”.

Vlad makes a face, “I think you’d benefit from a tutor as well”, straightening his suit, and huffing, “but very well, I suppose”.

Danny chuckling, “I’ll keep an eye on murder mittens and her prey”. More so for Maddie the cat’s well being and not the toaster from Satan’s asshole’s well being.

…

Vlad gets the thing Jack mailed him, he never threw out anything Daniel’s parents sent him, in case he one day needed to use it to prove their neglect to outright abuse in a court of law. Someday CPS was going to have a field day with the case of a lifetime and then some.

Danny glances at the… rubber duck? As Vlad comes back over. “What?”.

Vlad rubs his forehead, “I was confused as well. It actually gets worse, some how”. Vlad bops the things on the head, causing it to inflate into a twenty foot tall rubber duck.

The toaster snarls, “damn you, ducky fucky! Damn you!”.

Danny picks Maddie the cat up off of the toaster while making ‘I’m watching you’ motions with his free hand at the toaster.

The toaster, knowing it’s beat and fearing the cat, does not move.

Vlad picks up the massive duck and drops it on the toaster, it absorbs the toaster and promptly spits a teenager out of its beak. The teenager landing on his back in a crumbled heap.

Danny blinks, “what the fuck dad? I have way too many questions”. The teen coughs up a jingly ball cat toy and Maddie the cat launches herself out of Danny’s arm at the ball as it rolls away; fluffy legs trying to carry her faster than she can go.

The teen stands up, hunched over with his limbs all spread apart like he’s attempting to take a fighting pose while also being extremely grossed out.

Danny blinks, “sooooo, you gonna tell anyone?”. Vlad sighs in exasperation.

The teen slowly looks to Danny, who gives him a hopeful look. “Fucking why? I got turned into a toaster, accosted two deady teddy’s, beat up by a cat, and vomited out of a duck. Ain’t no one believing shit dick all”.

Danny chuckles, “that’s fair. Wes tries but everyone thinks he’s crazy and he ain’t claiming shit that weird”.

The teen raises an eyebrow at him, still having not moved any other part of him a single inch, “ya got another fucker who found out and is now trying to exposey woosey you? Ha! You suck”.

“Fuck you”.

Vlad ruffles Danny’s hair, “and my offer to sue the boy into silence or provide hush money still stands”.

“I’m kinda having fun with it honestly”.

“I’ve noticed, and support you terrorizing him entirely”.

The teen spits out a toast on to the floor, looks down and stares at it, then does it again. More toast flopping onto the floor, “huh. Yeah no. Fuck this shit I’m out”, and waddles back and forth out the front door like he still can’t move his legs.

…

Danny sighs slowly, “dad is so going to have to write an apology letter to that kid”.

Vlad rolls his eyes, “that man couldn’t be bothered to send me a single generic ‘get well soon’ card, you know he won’t do that”.

“Ugh”.

Danny absolutely has to get Jazz to write the apology letter, because Danny’s still to miffed about the toast assault to not come off as incredibly snide. Danny also collects as many toasts from Vlad’s place as he could and promptly dumped them on Wes in his sleep; he also finally mailed the box of muddy clothes.

The teen, meanwhile, absolutely spits toast at Jack the next time he sees the elder Fenton, it is absolutely caught on video. Said teen also turned out to be on the football team, which in typical Casper-high fashion, accepted him back on the team immediately. The Raven’s opponents were not prepared for the feral ex-toaster or his toast-related cruelty. Dash also later high-fived Danny, in the face, with a slice of toast as ‘gift’; Danny bit him without hesitation.

End.

PRompts: Danny's identity is found out in the funniest way possible. "Whatch'a got there?" "A smoothie" An unexpected person finds out Danny’s identity. (By unexpected I mean less his parents or Mr Lancer and more like, Star. Or Aunt Alicia. The more out there the better.) "I..I need your help." BadgerCereal Maybe Danny had been having a bit too much fun taunting Wes and even transforming in front of him. It was definitely coming back to bite him now…To be fair though, no one knew Desiree was right there. Maddie (the cat) saves the day Anything Badger Cereal (Vlad and Danny platonic father/son , mentor/apprentice )

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