something that keeps tripping me up in death note fandom is that, because the series has so many inconsistencies and holes, there are so many interpretations of the series, the characters, and I just can't keep it all straight in my head. lol. not to say I don't like it; I just struggle so much when I see two headcanons I like but they can't both work together.

So it really trips me up when it comes to headcanons of my own - I don't agree with things I wrote last month probably - and when world building for Riri...

aaand in the tags..

Is that the end of it? The Time War?

hes so fine i wish catholic people were real

i think uh gretchen and karen are gay and in love so here’s some of my headcanons about it :3

<3-before they got together, karen was incredibly clingy with gretchen and gretchen only (as i mentioned before, karen is just a very touchy person but gravitated toward gretchen)

<3-karen heard gretchen when she was singing “what’s wrong with me?” and went on a very long and heartfelt rant about how there’s nothing wrong with her

<3-that’s when gretch realised she had feelings for her best friend c:

<3-they literally share everything like if gretchen gets a coffee half of it will be drank by karen

<3-karen loses her things a lot so gretchen’s come to have extras always

<3-they make collaborative spotify playlists :3

<3-they’re always clinging to each other during sleepovers at regina’s and regina is a really big hater about it

<3-they had their first kiss after cady’s party

<3-gretchen was so upset about jason and karen was there for her the whole time

<3- “i dunno why you like him so much. you’re like…really nice and smart and pretty. but he’s so…not nice to you.” among other compliments

<3-gretchen could not believe that karen really felt that way about her

<3-she kinda just stared at karen for a few seconds

<3-they made out very passionately after that (gretchen kissed karen first even though she was terrified to)

<3-it took gretchen like a day after that to tell karen she actually liked her

<3-they were each other’s dates to the spring fling c: they weren’t official yet at that point

<3-when they started dating, karen asked gretchen, “does this make you or me the boyfriend?”

<3-gretchen calls karen “mama”, “(mi) amor”, or “kare-bear” if she’s feeling particularly corny and karen calls gretchen “gretch” always

<3-they have movie nights with regina, cady, aaron, janis, and damian and whenever someone picks a horror movie karen gets scared so easily that she just huddles up to gretchen the whole time

<3-gretchen absolutely loves karen’s big brown eyes like there might actually be nothing she loves more in the whole world

<3-karen loves biting gretchen like not in a sexual way she just thinks gretchen looks so edible she will bite her very softly all the time

<3-gretchen will absentmindedly do that thing with her thumb when she and karen are holding hands and it kinda drives karen crazy

<3-they do that cheesy couple thing where they rest their foreheads together like they’re about to kiss and everyone else hates it (affectionately)

<3-karen had feelings for gretchen for a while and made it painfully obvious but just never said anything

<3-gretchen is a lesbian (i’m kinda projecting with this one) jason was just her comphet fr

<3-karen is pan (this is semi canon/confirmed by avantika)

<3-gretchen has insomnia and often calls karen in the middle of the night just to hear her voice

<3-gretchen sometimes has panic attacks and karen is the only person who knows exactly how to calm her down

<3-gretchen picks at her cuticles and karen brings her colourful bandaids and holds her hands to prevent her from doing so

<3-gretchen gets quite jealous easily,, mostly due to being a very anxious and insecure person

okay . i’m done thank u for coming to my ted talk ^w^ (i have more please ask me about them if you want)

Zutaras are really the original self-insert, "we understand the story soooooo much better than everybody else" girlies and they just never moved on

babe would you still love me if we were superheroes and you were in danger and i went absolutely bonkers and crossed every moral boundary imaginable to protect you at literally any cost?

I'm not part of the good omens fandom like I enjoy the show but not to the extent that I feel the need to make fan content for it or go seeking out fan content which is frustrating rn because I don't know if the they're aware of the song Angel by first aid kit and I really hope they are

Shadow and Bone fans? Waiting patiently for season 2?? In the meantime, may I introduce you to Lockwood & Co., streaming on Netflix now!!

It baffles/saddens me that in TYOOL 2022, there continues to be no wlw fic about these two getting up in each others' business.

You guys. I only have so many hours in the day. I cannot spend it on fanfiction anymore. ;n; pls help, I'm dying.

It's been a minute......

Please don't be too mad and please checkout these fics and see if you recognise any? It would be really appreciated. Thank you so much and I'm sorry. I hope everyone is doing really well!

i wish i wouldn't do this to myself. why do i buy games on steam and then not play them for a while and then hate them and request a refund way outside of the refund time window

Ok I’m so sorry in advance to everyone, but y’all are about to get so many notifications from me.

I was just giving mutuals two boops to keep even numbers, but I’ve already forgotten if I’ve booped some people or not, and there’s boop badges…

So! I will try to only boop mutuals and my followers, but I am sorry for the notif spam.

I will get the boop badges though, rip to y’all >:3

GUYS I just got my first ever anon hate!! I've been on this webbed site for ten years and have never gotten anon hate but it's here!! I am being suicide baited over a 2-note post where I said I like fucked up edizzy (no reblogs, one of the notes is my SISTER!!) This is so exciting I feel like a celebrity

hi.

how’s everyone? 👀

If you're still doing the choose violence ask game: 2 (👀), 9, 10, 22 ?

I got such a rush from finally answering the first ask that I'm doing this for as long as people send me questions. So here we go again!

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

anon, I'm at work. I'm seeing this at work. :'D

Okay, serious face. Albus Dumbledore is probably my fave if I have to choose between him and Harry on this blog. I just have to figure out why he would never...

Bottom. Albus would never, I'm sorry. He won't. He can't. Like, maybe when he was having his whirlwind summer romance with Gellert, he bottomed every single time they fucked because he was so in love and this was his equal and his partner and so what if he was a little rough and distant sometimes in the bedroom, and always wanted to top and tug his hair and hiss out orders? This was The Man The Universe Had Crafted For Him, and he would absolutely bottom for him every time... and then the summer of 1899 ends. And Ariana dies. And Aberforth breaks Albus' nose. And Gellert fucks off to go be a fascist.

And Albus, alone and heartbroken, resolves to never trust someone that completely again, never love someone that same way, and never let anyone get into a position of power over him where they might be able to use his knowledge and talents for ill. That means physically, emotionally, spiritually, psychologically... carnally. So he has sex with plenty of other people, and even falls in love with a few of them, but he is in control at all times. He never bottoms again.

That's all I've got for that one.

9. worst part of canon

So the first answer that came to mind is posted here, but for fairness' sake I'll try to come up with another worst thing. (That's not related to ships, because I'm trying really hard not to be THAT violent on the violence ask game.)

I think... that if That Woman was going to introduce international schools, students and characters in the middle book of the series, she should have done more with them than having them vanish after Goblet of Fire, only to come back for either fake romantic tension and one line of exposition about the Hitler allegory Dark Lord of the Before-Times (Krum, Deathly Hallows) or to be married off to a Weasley for an aesop of It's Not About His Looks Now That They're Jacked Up (Fleur, Half-Blood Prince). I'm not saying Fleur and Viktor HAD to be best buddies forever with Harry, but it is weird that they have this unique bond that no other young students have had with each other in hundreds of years, they even lost one of their fellow champions, Dumbledore gives this very moving speech about remaining connected and not letting darkness and prejudice sever new ties, and then... nothing. No side adventures in France or wherever Durmstrang is, no communication from either side, nothing.

Feels like a huge letdown in hindsight.

10. worst part of fanon

Oh, no. That's not fair. There's just so many.

If I had to consolidate what I currently don't like about the HP fandom/fanon into a few lines, I think I would say that I hate the pureblood/Dark side apologism. I do believe in nuance in characters. I do believe redemption and/or walking different paths is an important theme in Harry Potter, and I think it's fascinating to explore that with any and every character you can think of, even characters I may not personally like. But I really, really hate the way the fandom has taken that and twisted it into this idea that we were sold a lie at the start: that the British magical government was fine the way it was, and so was the society around it; that Dark magic Isn't All That Bad, Really, and there are actually Good and non-prejudiced things about a few rich bitches passing down their knowledge and secrets and slurs for generations within the Family, and keeping the Family "Pure" is cool actually, and none of this has any relation to real life ideas about miscegenation and classism and racism and eugenics, what are you talking about?

It's just so worrying. As a minority, when I see people on tumblr/twitter/AO3 gleefully agreeing that we need to eat the rich and fix society and eradicate all the horrid -isms and -archys ruining all our lives, then watch them turn around and write a 200k epic where Dumbledore was the evil one for locking the Horcrux books away and championing marginalized members of society, Hermione is just uppity for wanting to make necessary changes to the darker parts of magical society that That Woman was literally pointing out for a reason, and Tom Riddle is only bad because he took the good segregationist pureblood ideas and added murder to them... and when that fic gets thousands of comments agreeing with them full stop with no examination of any of that... it makes me anxious, at a minimum. The same thing is happening now with Grindelwald now that he's actually a figure on the screen and not just some dude mentioned a few times in the book series: same apologism, same justification of atrocities, same good-guy-blame-games, same blorbofication even.

On the one hand... fiction doesn't always directly reflect or affect reality. On the other... this unironic pro-pureblood meta is a pervasive concept that has popped up in thousands of fics written by thousands of fanfic writers. It's happened for years, and it keeps happening, and I see very few fans speaking out against it or even acknowledging it as a problem. So that makes me ask myself, who actually is willing and able to examine the injustices of our society and build a better imaginary society through the lens of HP fanfiction, and who's okay with the prejudice in the HP world as long as it's coming from the faves they're attracted to?

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

Happily, this is a harder question to answer because I've been finding so many like minds in the past 5 years who go feral over the same 20 HP scenes as I do. ^^ But give me a sec, I'll think of something.

...

Okay. Got it.

In order to answer this question, I have to go back to the first time I, young teenager, avid reader, recent reader of the HP series once book 5 was out, realized that Harry and Dumbledore had a much deeper relationship than just headmaster and student. The thing that made me latch on to them and project like crazy, basically.

It's the scene in Goblet of Fire chapter 36 where Harry has been rescued from Fake Moody and he's in Dumbledore's office with Dumbledore and Sirius. Dumbledore asks Harry to relay everything that happened to him once he touched the Portkey in the maze—and immediately Sirius tries to protect Harry from having to relive it now, so soon after it's happened. And then this scene happens.

Dumbledore stopped talking. He sat down opposite Harry, behind his desk. He was looking at Harry, who avoided his eyes. Dumbledore was going to question him. He was going to make Harry relive everything. “I need to know what happened after you touched the Portkey in the maze, Harry,” said Dumbledore. “We can leave that till morning, can’t we, Dumbledore?” said Sirius harshly. He had put a hand on Harry’s shoulder. “Let him have a sleep. Let him rest.” Harry felt a rush of gratitude toward Sirius, but Dumbledore took no notice of Sirius’s words. He leaned forward toward Harry. Very unwillingly, Harry raised his head and looked into those blue eyes. “If I thought I could help you,” Dumbledore said gently, “by putting you into an enchanted sleep and allowing you to postpone the moment when you would have to think about what has happened tonight, I would do it. But I know better. Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it. You have shown bravery beyond anything I could have expected of you. I ask you to demonstrate your courage one more time. I ask you to tell us what happened.” The phoenix let out one soft, quavering note. It shivered in the air, and Harry felt as though a drop of hot liquid had slipped down his throat into his stomach, warming him, and strengthening him. He took a deep breath and began to tell them. As he spoke, visions of everything that had passed that night seemed to rise before his eyes; he saw the sparkling surface of the potion that had revived Voldemort; he saw the Death Eaters Apparating between the graves around them; he saw Cedric’s body, lying on the ground beside the cup. Once or twice, Sirius made a noise as though about to say something, his hand still tight on Harry’s shoulder, but Dumbledore raised his hand to stop him, and Harry was glad of this, because it was easier to keep going now he had started. It was even a relief; he felt almost as though something poisonous were being extracted from him. It was costing him every bit of determination he had to keep talking, yet he sensed that once he had finished, he would feel better.

This is one of the best scenes in the entire book, the entire series. It completely refutes the fanon Dumbledore who is often cold, cruel, inflexible and unrelenting in his quest for whatever the author wants him to be inflexible and cruel about at the time. It shows that Dumbledore, the real Albus Dumbledore, is one of the few people who understands what Harry needs and is able to provide it to him, even when others who also care for Harry would rather protect him or shield him from what he needs.

Kid me was particularly taken by how gentle Dumbledore is with Harry here. It made me look back and see how in some ways this scene, this closeness, is the culmination of all the times they've met and spoken before.

(You can imagine how painful it was reading Order of the Phoenix right after this.)

But yeah, that's probably one of my favorite scenes that other people ignore or haven't talked about/drawn/written about much. Which is ironic, because the scene right after that where Harry talks about Voldemort taking his blood and Dumbledore's eyes do the triumphant "lol Voldemort just fucked up" gleam is probably one of THE most talked-about scenes in the fandom (even though to this fucking day in 2023 people still don't realize what the gleam meant, when even That Woman has clarified what it meant in INTERVIEWS).

...And for me, safely at the end of the questions, that's all she wrote.

another non snz post I apologize but uh- just finished reading through the first 151 chapters of J/ujutsu K/aisen... (took me 6 hours of straight reading xD) and I am feeling supremely unwell about these characters/this story. I will be finishing the rest tomorrow once my 100 chapter limit resets. I won't ramble on but just wanted to say that um? I am feeling so many feelings about this! I am even more excited for season 2!! Didn't think that was possible!! And yes anyways just being so unchill about S/atoS/ugu over here <3333