#listen i know this is a weird ass ship but i thought about it in passing in november and havent been able ot think of anything else.
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YOTO: April
Ignatz/Dorothea. Canon divergence/“no I’m not dating your brother”.
Derdriu was the last place Ignatz thought he’d ever seen Dorothea Arnault.
It was a momentary glance, as he left a client’s business on behalf of his parents. The gold jingled in his pockets, hitting against his thigh. His eyes trained to the ground, he focused on the salty, sour scent of the nearby sea, the cool winter air, the sounds of merchants advertising their wares and people passing and—
The softest, sweet tone took to the air. He listened harder. He knew that voice.
“Dorothea?”
A pair of jade eyes looked back at him, pleading and overjoyed.
“Ignatz?”
—
Dorothea is as charming and bewitching as she was in the academy. And she eats—her manners impeccable and conduct befitting of a lady—like she hasn’t seen food in a month.
The restaurant is warm and bustling. After noticing the cut of the dress Dorothea wore and her pale complexion, Ignatz requested a table closest to the hearth and speedily ordered a pot of tea.
She is all graces and thank yous, gentle inclines of her head in which her bangs fall into her eyes and she continuously pushes it behind her ears to stay away from her lovely mouth.
She explains, between a delicate sip of her tea that she had helped with the dispersal of the Enbarr Opera House and the Mittelfrank Opera Company, her alma mater.
“I wanted to help people.” She murmurs. “But…”
“I understand.” Ignatz says as another bowl of bread arrives, and with it another refill of the teapot with hot water..
“My finances aren’t exactly liquid. I managed to find a way from Enbarr to here. Bern was kind enough to convey me, without her father’s knowing, but she couldn’t come with me.”
“Why the Alliance?” Ignatz finds himself asking.
Dorothea’s face takes on a grave countenance. “I love Edie… Loved. But I cannot stand by while she murders innocents.” She says softly. “And the Kingdom did not seem much better.“ She forces, what he expects was to be a chipper giggle, but it’s a defeated chuckle. “I’d probably freeze passing over the border.”
“So you came here.”
“I had the pleasure of taking tea with Claude once or twice, and unfortunately, Lorenz too. They made this place sound beautiful.”
“It is quite breathtaking.” He says, glancing out the far-off window. If he squints, he can catch a glimpse of the grey sea.
“I crossed the Bridge of Myrddin and came here. Most of my funds are gone, but…” She forces a smile. “I’m here.”
“Are you going to stay with Claude?”
“My housing situation is… it isn’t fixed.”
“Well then you must stay with us.”
“Us?”
Ignatz nods. “My family.” He explains. “My brother is studying beneath my father to inherit the business—the Victor Trading Company—and he sends me out on small jobs.” He makes himself sound brighter. “Like today. I had just finished a commission before crossing paths with you.”
“I couldn’t impose.”
“Dorothea,” Ignatz says firmly. She meets his gaze. He notices that she’s grown thinner, her face pale. “I must insist.”
She heaves a sigh, reaches across the table and pats his hand. He feels his face heat. “At least… At least let me ask.”
Ignatz smiles. “Whatever you please.” He agrees and encourages her to take the last sweet bun.
***
A plan is worked out over steaming cups of tea. It takes a little lying—but with Ignatz’s newfound confidence—it is nothing more than a bent truth.
With his cut from the commission, he puts Dorothea up in an inn for the evening—specifically the Kristen Cottage run by his best friend, Raphael. When the jovial brawler sees Dorothea and Ignatz he pulls her into a bear hug and twirls her around. His little sister, Maya, almost drops her dishes upon seeing the famed Mystical Songstress herself.
Raphael closes the tavern, insists that Ignatz stay for a drink while Maya helps Dorothea upstairs and tends to her. They talk, and when Dorothea returns, she relays her story to the Kirsten siblings. At the end, Raphael asks the crucial question:
“So, what happens now?”
“Well, Raphie, that’s where you come in.” She says. “I need work. Have you any need for entertainment? I can sing, dance, I’ll even help in the kitchen!”
“But what about…” Ignatz falls silent as Dorothea grabs his hand beneath the table.
“Of course we do!” Maya exclaims happily.
“My, Grandpa hasn’t approved—”
Maya turns back to Raphael—she’s tinier than him but just as loud. “Raph! A former opera star in our joint? That would drag! The! Customers! In!”
Dorothea smiles softly. “It would…” she says. “I remember all of my best roles!”
Maya turns to Dorothea, eyes wide. “R-Really? Oh, even as Marguerite?” She asks. “She’s my favourite one of your roles… The songs were all so sad, I cried buckets!”
“Well I hope you have a pail,” says Dorothea with a wink. “if Raphie has me, I’ll sing them all for you.”
“Please?” Maya whines.
Raphael gives in. “Alright, of course.” He says. “But we can only put you up for a while. It’s sorta packed in here tonight. You could stay with us, we’re downstairs in the basement.”
Dorothea’s eyes grew glassy. “It’s more than I could’ve ever hoped for. Thank you Raphael.”
As the night drew to a close, Ignatz begins to say his farewells, promising to check-in on them the following day. Dorothea, unexpectedly, throws her arms around his neck and hugs him tight.
“Thank you Ignatz. For everything.” She whispers softly.
He feels himself blush again and promises anything for her.
Over the course of the next few days, in between Dorothea working tirelessly as the new—and showstopping headliner for the Kirsten Cottage—and Ignatz’s own duties keeping up client communications and other duties, they met a few times in the warm tavern.
It was after close and Ignatz comes for a sole glass of wine. Dorothea sits beside him, humming softly under her breath.
“Do you still draw?”
His ears grow hot. Guiltily, he replies. “W-When I have a moment of privacy, yes. But those moments are few and far between.”
“That’s sad.”
He remains quiet. “It must be gratifying to do what you love as a career.”
“I mean, look where it got me.” Dorothea muses. “Getting into Enbarr during the military lockdown was a nightmare, and then to break up my family… It was hell.”
Ignatz inclines his head. “I’m sorry Dorothea. I should’ve been more prudent.”
“It’s fine.” She says before tapping her nails across the table. “But…”
He looks at her encouragingly. She leans closer, glancing towards the kitchen where the Kirsten siblings clean up for the night. “Somedays I wished I never sang at all.”
“Really?”
“Mmhm.” She nods. “It’s… I love it, but constantly singing over and over… It takes all the meaning out of it.”
“But you do what you love.” He asks, surprised.
“Yes, and I get tired of it.” Dorothea says before hastily adding, “but I’m eternally grateful to Raphael and his family for giving me the work… I just wish… I wish I weren’t so tired of singing.”
“You…” Ignatz murmurs before meeting her gaze. “And it isn’t like you can afford to take a break.”
“No.” She confirms. “Unless I make up a paycheque in another way.”
Silence falls between the two.
“I still… I can’t believe you don’t love singing anymore.”
“I do it so much, the joy is stripped from it.” She confesses quietly to him.
The words stalk him all the way home and up to his room where he gazes at his painting tools before succumbing to sleep.
***
Ignatz’s mother—Cressida—and his younger sister a year his junior named Celeste—are more shocked when he says he’s met someone.
Cressida’s eyes widen and she lowers her teacup very quickly. Ignatz has always known his mother to be refined and ladylike: calm, quiet, watchful. He feels her brown eyes—the only thing he got from her—on him as Celeste prods him.
“A lady friend?” She smirks, at the age of 19, and still as annoying as she was at seven. “When do I buy a new parasol and lace and welcome a sister?”
Quickly, he insists, “She’s an old friend from Garreg Mach.” Ignatz explains, watching Celeste’s mischievous look.
“Probably some baron’s daughter. You could do worse, I suppose, Brother.”
“She’s passing through Derdriu.”
“Where to?”
“Gloucester. She will be singing for the Count and his son.”
Cressida studies her son’s face. He’s gotten too good with lying; for years, he’d fidget with his hands or look away… A small tic that would render him guilty. “She is a singer?” She inquires.
“Formerly of the Mittelfrank Opera Company.”
Cressida looks intrigued. “Oh. I recall seeing the company when they were in Derdriu before the war and when you were at the Academy.”
“You would have missed her. She was one of my classmates.”
Cressida remains silent.
“So why’s she talking to you?” Celeste prods. “If she’s some big opera star…”
“She confessed that she always enjoyed my company.” He lies. “And I enjoyed hers, so we have spent a little time together.”
Celeste smirks, then murmurs under her breath, “here comes the bride…”
“Celeste.” Cressida says quietly. Celeste stops humming and turns back to her eggs which are now cold.
Her brown eyes fall on Ignatz, encouraging him to go on.
“I would like host her for a meal.“
“Very well.” Cressida agrees. “Your father and Atticus will be dining out tonight, so bring her around.”
Ignatz tenses. The plan was to have both his father and brother around. Without him, his mother will never offer accommodations, at least not without a push.
So Ignatz, for the first time in his life, pushes.
“Might she stay the night?” He asks, his face reddening. Celeste’s eyes go wide as if she’s about to snort at him. “I would like her to meet Father.”
Cressida narrows her gaze on him. “Why?”
“I think they would get along, Mother.”
Cressida pauses, sips her tea and then acquiesces. “Very well. Bring her to the manor at five and no later.”
***
If there was ever any doubt as to Dorothea’s charms, it was dispelled in the moment she met Cressida.
Ignatz had always known his mother—like his father—as hard-to-please, but Dorothea was the most satisfying creature to her ever. Even Atticus, who had always been her favourite, was quickly forgotten when Dorothea engaged her in conversation.
As Celeste serves the coffee, she murmurs to Ignatz, “Okay, maybe I doubt you, but never again.” She promises. “She’s gorgeous.”
Ignatz acquiesces. “She is. And she’s quite kind.”
Little lies and bent truths are shared that evening. Dorothea explains that she’s passing through to sing for Lorenz and his father—the name drop impresses Cressida—and then she details her roles, and as they sit in the drawing room, Cressida insists that Dorothea sing for her.
“Oh, that’s not necessary,” Ignatz insists, turning to his mother nervously. “We wouldn’t want to impose on our guest…”
“No,” Dorothea says gently. “I’d love to sing for you.”
Ignatz thinks back to the conversation in the tavern. How she began to loathe singing. But as she sings her bars and warms her voice up, Ignatz cannot help but long to paint her. Those jade eyes, that chestnut hair, the willowy frame and ruddy cheeks… She is an artist’s dream, walked off the canvas.
She sings beautifully for almost a half hour. Cressida is highly impressed and gives her ready approval, and even Celeste is shocked when Dorothea proves not only to be witty, beautiful and talented, but also kind.
Cressida insists that she will stay the night and tells Ignatz to set her up in the east wing of the house, prefacing that she may see the lovely sunrise that pales in comparison to her beauty. After they say goodnight, Ignatz offers her his arm and leads her up the staircase.
She reaches for his hand and smiles at him. She gives it a reassuring little squeeze, and he gives one back. As they reach the top of the stairs, Dorothea whispers to him:
“Will you show me your paintings?” She asks quietly. “I know art’s a personal thing… I don’t think I could ever show a half-finished song to someone else…”
“Y-Yes…” He finds himself taking her hand and leading her to his room. The moon streams into through the lone window of his sombre little room.
He turns to the closet and pulls from it a few sketches and his tiny easel which has a half-finished still-life of the view outside his window. Blushing and embarrassed, he practically throws them at Dorothea, hurriedly insisting that he knows they’re not good, that they’re nothing special.
“Ignatz…” Dorothea barely breathes. “These are beautiful.”
He looks up in shock. “B-But…” He scrambles for words. “I was so insensitive to your feelings about art!”
Dorothea smiles gently and touches his hand reassuringly. “Ignatz, I’m not me, and you’re not you.” She says gingerly. “We’re different people with different outlooks… You want to become a painter, right?”
He nods sheepishly.
“Then I hope, with all my heart, that you can become one someday.” She turns her eyes back on a sketch of Saint Cethleann. “You’d be a wonderful artist. I’m certain you would be.”
Ignatz blushes softly and moves closer as she asks a question about the next sketch—of Saint Cichol, his wife and their daughter—and he explains the details. His hand brushes against hers, their fingers intertwining briefly—
“And who is this?”
Ignatz jolts at the deep voice, his blood running cold. His face goes red. In the doorway is his elder brother, Atticus. Dorothea glances his way and smiles softly, curtseys and introduces herself as the evening’s guest and her credentials.
Atticus studies Dorothea before making a comment beneath his breath about his “useless drawings” and leaving the two. Dorothea’s smile fades.
“He’s exactly the type of man I’d hate to be with at the opera…” She whispers to him. “And exactly the one who’d pay for a dinner with me.”
Ignatz’s stomach rolls with anxiety.
Dorothea steals a glimpse at his expression and laughs softly. “Don’t worry, I’m not dating your brother.” She promises.
“Thank the goddess…” Ignatz whispers.
She hugs him. “Thank you. Thank you so much.”
He hugs her back and smiles. “Anything for you.”
He shows Dorothea her room, and upon returning to his, takes charcoal to paper and attempts to sketch the likeness of her face, falling asleep in his art before long.
***
Ignatz’s father, Augustus, makes quick decisions. It is, perhaps, what has kept him in business for so long, and flourishing for just as long. And that morning, when Ignatz nervously introduces the two, he immediately takes a liking to Dorothea.
She turns on the charms quickly, and as she’s about to collect her bags and return to the Kirsten’s Cottage, Augustus asks to see her in his study. She winks at Ignatz and he waits nervously outside, in the drawing room with Celeste as the plays the piano.
When Dorothea emerges, she wears a self-assured smile. Ignatz quickly gets up and meets her in the hallway.
“Your father says the garden is pretty. Will you show me?” She asks.
“Of course.” They go outside to the frosty garden and walk a few paces away from the windows.
“Well?”
“Your father… he asked that I shadow you. He thinks that we could be a good selling team.” Dorothea says. “What do you say, Iggy?”
“Iggy?”
“You needed a nickname. Your name, though it is handsome, is a bit imposing and long.” She says. “You okay with it? You can call me Thea, if you’d like?”
“No no,” He declines respectfully. “Your name is too beautiful to be shortened.”
She smiles softly. “You think so?”
He nods. “I do. And as for the partnership, I don’t think I could ask for a better match.”
Dorothea smiles, and then stands on the tips of her toes and pecks him on the cheek. Ignatz goes bright red.
Gazing at her, he smiles and confesses, “I don’t think I could either.”
***
In Imperial Year 1185, on the day of promised meeting, Ignatz Victor and Dorothea Arnault arrived at Garreg Mach Monastery together. The three years since their reunion in Derdriu had proved fruitful: Dorothea joined the Victor Trading Company as a sales agent, working alongside Ignatz. She easily used her wit and charms to seal deals with particularly hard-to-please clients. She’d also passed on that charm and confidence to Ignatz, which his former classmates noticed immediately.
In addition to his newfound confidence, Ignatz had gained a deeper reverence for his artistic side. After being found one night attempting to paint Dorothea’s likeness, she modelled for him. His parents, finally understanding the depth of his talent, allowed him time off—though minimal—to study and paint.
In their moments of peace, it was said that Dorothea and Ignatz would share their talents together—Dorothea, who had retired from the stage, would sing only for him, and Ignatz would happily draw anything she wished.
After the war, when Dorothea completed an opera—called the Crimson Flower, based upon her late, dear friend—Ignatz was the one to paint the posters and served as creative consultant. While not singing, Dorothea directed the opera to critical acclaim, and acted as a guardian to the new talent she selected for the show.
When the two had grown tired of the stage, they departed for new lands. Ignatz’s work, which grew in popularity thanks to the production and his own skills, was in demand and often peddled by Dorothea. It was often remarked, by friends and complete strangers, the couple were an odd, but well-suited match.
#year of the otp#FE3H#dorothea arnault#ignatz victor#ru writes#listen i know this is a weird ass ship but i thought about it in passing in november and havent been able ot think of anything else.#this isn’t an April fool’s joke I’m dead serious I think they could work and i may fuckindie on this hill#still crazy into dorovain though#Ignatz X Dorothea#god that’s so fucking weird#but fr dorothea throwing herself dramatically on a couch like ‘draw me like one of your derdriu girls Iggy!!’ And he’s just sobbing and#covered in charcoal bc he’s been drawing for hours and can’t get her nose right and he just wants to sleep#there’s potential i swear there is#also i may write the other idea i had which is essentially like. The above but in a uni au where they’re both broke#and dorothea is a struggling actress who only gets roles to play a dead body on crime shows and a dramatic soapy villain who dies on a soap#opera. Yes i am projecting about Aileen Ashby’s death on GH and stealing from my FWB au#anywyas i work in like. 7 hours bye.
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Chaos in Their Bones Ch. 4
Ongoing Series
Synopsis: All your life you’d listened to your friend, Usopp spin wild tales about pirates and adventure. Pirates weren’t a thing that came often to Syrup Village, but one straw hat pirate and his crew changed all that the day they arrived. Now, you aren’t so sure if your sleepy little village was always pirate-free or if no one had been paying attention.
Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader
Genre: friends to lovers, frenemies to lovers, slow burn (I hope y’all like aching) eventual smut
Words: 8.7+
A/N: This chapter is mostly filler from 1.04-1.05. This chapter also, once again has a POV from Zoro. I kept going through my options of what I could do to possibly give these two idiots more alone time and this was the result. The beginning, and introduction, of Sanji begins right at Chapter 5 and I already have too many ✨ideas ✨ that I know what to do with. Also, I did add in Zoro working out. It’s a brief mention, but I just found it weird he didn’t have any of those scenes (probably for damn good reason). As always, thank you guys for all the love and support. I hope you all continue to enjoy this story🖤 Much Love, Jenn
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Previous Next
“I don’t know, Doc. You’re starting to look a little pale.”
“And green.”
You’d been hugging the side of this particular railing since you’d sailed out of port. It was your first time ever on a ship and it wasn’t going too great. You’d heard about seasickness and even had sailors come asking for Naan’s Elfroot to chew to stem the tide while they were out at sea. You always thought they were being ridiculous. How bad could it be?
Well, if your dry heaving was any indication - pretty bad. Of course, Zoro just had to make it worse.
You glanced up from looking at the water that was gently tapping the side of the boat to the growing bane of your existence. One hand was tucked into the pocket of his jeans while the other rested on the hilt of his swords. He looked effortlessly cool as he watched you with - was that a smirk?
He’d changed into a yellow shirt with fine detailing of gray lines running horizontally and vertically, which matched perfectly with his gray pants.
Zoro was more of a fashionista than he’d let on.
“It’s just the reflection of your hair,” you shot back at him.
You could feel the next wave of nausea thrashing around in your stomach and you prayed you could keep it down. You were going to lose more cool points if you hurled again. Zoro squinted over the sun's rays to regard your current state. He must have been able to tell you were 0.2 seconds from hurling because, instead of replying, he simply twirled his finger indicating for you to turn around.
You did as he instructed, but made sure to follow it up with a middle finger salute.
“Man, you two always like this? You just met.” Usopp asked.
Usopp tried doing the dotting friend routine by patting you a few times, awkwardly, on your back. It felt more like he was trying to get a burp out of you than soothe you.
“It’s because they like each other.”
Nami pranced out of the galley and chose violence. It only took both you and Zoro to register her words before you both shouted:
“I don’t like her.”
“I hate him!”
Nami wrapped her arms around herself as she looked you both over. A devious smile tilting the edges of her mouth and you had to look away before it turned into the shit eating grin you’d come to expect.
“I’m sure you both do,” she teased.
You wanted to prove to her that you meant it. Zoro would be the last person you would say you liked, like- like that. The man was literally the biggest pain in the ass you’d ever met.
“Usopp,” you croaked, “can you get my bag, please.”
“I’m on it, Doc.”
At the sound of his feet hitting the deck, a groan of discomfort resonated in your chest. How could anyone think that sailing was fun? This felt like the absolute worst.
When you first entered the Going Merry you couldn’t believe how beautiful it was. You’d heard Usopp tell you stories since he cleaned it everyday. It was as finely crafted as he’d described, and the white ashwood against the walnut was a stark contrast but complemented each other beautifully. There wasn’t another ship like the Going Merry and a one-of-a-kind ship should belong to someone as extraordinary as Luffy.
The minute you’d cast off into the giant blue you’d almost panicked. What if this was a mistake? You’d never been out in open water before nor had you ever left Syrup village. This could either be one of the greatest adventures of your life or a disaster. The only thing that kept you from flinging yourself over the side and swimming back was when you’d walked the stern and the glint of the sun shone down on the water.
The sun’s rays illuminated the water like light reflecting off a crystal glass. One minute it was the deepest blue. The color was solid enough that your reflection was easy to see and in a matter of seconds after a ray of light touched its water, it took on a cornflower hue that made the water translucent.
You’d been able to admire it for all of three seconds before you were embarrassing yourself over the port bow.
“I’m back, Doc,” Usopp spoke softly as he placed a soft hand on your shoulder. He lightly tapped the bag against your hands to try and coax you to grab it. “Do you need me to get you water or anything?”
“Water is not going to help. It’ll make it worse.”
You thought he was trying just to be his usual monotoned “Hi, I’m Zoro and I could care less,” self, but when you finally peeled your forehead off your forearm and looked at him he wasn’t even looking at either of you. He was curled up, like a lazy cat, against a couple of crates with his eyes closed and faced tilted towards the sun. With his hands infamously stuffed inside his pockets.
“It would?”
You nodded your head only once in recognition before you started searching through your bag. Your hands started scrambling inside it a soft, “No,no,” building into a frenzy before you stopped searching.
“I’m guessing your magic little root isn’t in there.”
Zoro was still sitting without a care while you felt like you wanted to throw yourself overboard.
“No. It isn’t.”
Mental note: Ask Luffy to stop at Irkhaven Isle to get supplies.
Suddenly, Zoro stood in one graceful motion and walked off towards the galley.
Ass.
You turned back to the Going Merry’s railing and held on tight. Your stomach felt like you’d swallowed glass and got punched, it was so empty. Another groan was building in your chest when a cold bottle touched the back of your arm.
The coolness to your skin sent a yelp of surprise from you, and sent you whirling to the presence beside you. Zoro was leaning back against the railing, looking as calm as ever, with a beer extended out between you.
“Isn’t it a little bit too early to be drinking?”
He rolled his eyes as he switched positions. He was now mimicking your current position against the rail but looked effortless and was still holding that damn beer out to you.
“It’s for you.”
“For me? Zoro, I don’t think now is the time to be drinking-“
“Just drink it,” he growled, an obvious annoyance replacing his earlier calm.
What hell, what was a beer going to do? At most, it would at least give your stomach something to actually throw up instead of dry heaving yourself into a six pack.
You reached out and took it from him. Zoro continued to watch you as you placed the bottle to your lips, waiting for you to take a sip.
“Could I get some privacy here?”
Zoro rolled his eyes but did as you asked looking off into the southside of the ship. You took that moment to take a long pull from the bottle. Surprisingly, it was damn good beer. You waited for the bitter aftertaste to kick in, but found it replaced with the tang of citrus. You immediately took another drink and another. It wasn’t until you were halfway to the middle of the bottle that you noticed the ship had been rocked a few times by the waves and yet…
You went to turn your attention back to Zoro and found him already staring at you.
I am not blushing.
You turned quickly to look back out at the ocean with both arms leaning over the railing as you took in the picturesque view. You couldn’t believe beer was making your sea sickness disappear. Out of your peripherals you waited for him to turn away from you. Unable to say it to his face as you played with the label that was peeling off from condensation.
Alcohol. It was brilliant. You were sure your body was still feeling sick, but the depressant in the beer wasn’t allowing those receptors to acknowledge it. Tilting the bottle at him you asked, “How’d you know this would work.”
“It’s how I survived all my boat trips. Old guy I’d met aboard my first ship when I was seventeen taught me that trick.”
“Is that why you have so much booze? Cause you have a weak stomach?”
Your question came off worse than you intended. You genuinely weren’t trying to insult him. He’d just helped you. Zoro has helped you.
“No. I just like to drink.”
His tone was void of all emotion. The little bit he’d given you quickly washed away and you wanted to kick yourself.
Foot meet mouth. Mouth meets foot.
You weren’t very good at this. The only friend you’d ever actually had was Usopp. The both of you know the tone of the other and every secret in between. You’d tried to make friends with the other kids in town, but holding up a frog as a friendship gift didn’t seem to go over too well. And on that wonderful trip down memory lane…
You straightened up and took a smaller sip from the beer before you leaned down to pick up your abandoned satchel.
“Thank you, Zoro.”
The both of you stared at the other until the silence was washed out by the squawking of seagulls and the rush of water. Even now in this weird game of chicken, you knew you would be the first to give. His dark eyes staring straight through you until you felt exposed. You tipped the bottle for good measure and turned on your heel to make your way inside the safety of the kitchen. Your hand clutching the bottle close as your brain tried to make sense of what happened.
Zoro helped you. He didn’t have too and for all intents and purposes you were surprised he didn’t just let you suffer, but he’d chosen not to. What did that even mean? He was just being friendly. It didn’t mean anything more than that.
Instead of dwelling on the question, you sat down in the corner booth and took another pull from the bottle.
——————-
After you finished your first bottle, you found another, and another until you’d ended up blissfully passed out in the booth. You were vaguely aware that Luffy and the crew had come into the galley at some point. The sound of Usopp and Luffy struggling to talk over the other was what forced you out of your nap.
“We all know who the Captain is.”
“It’s me.”
Two voices rang out as one with each ending in a high-pitch of surprise. It was his first day and already Usopp was trying to stir up mutiny on the ship. If you weren’t interested in staying unconscious you were positive you would’ve smiled.
“Just call me Captain Usopp.”
“We already know I’m the Captain.”
It didn’t surprise you they were still giving out declarations of who was Captain. You waited for it to become a campaign, like when Townsfolk ran for Mayor, but the sound of Nami’s laughter followed by - was that Zoro?! - ended both men’s rant.
“See, this is what it’s all about,” Luffy’s voice chimed in. “From now it’s going to be smooth sailing.”
He was his usual happy sounding self. You were willing to bet it was infectious, making everyone’s earlier laughter remain in the small creases by their eyes and the raise of their lips. Luffy was indeed a Captain and one of the best kind.
Enjoying the moment abruptly ended, however, when you caught the sound of a whistle outside. It grew more intense by the second. Whatever it was, was slicing through the air with a force that was audible. You weren’t sure why it took so long for your brain to register that it wasn’t a natural sound. It was rectified, however, when something violently slammed into the Going Merry and sent everything trembling.
Your back immediately shot up off the cushion of the booth. Eyes open wide as you stumble to your feet watching Nami and Zoro do the same.
“What in the hell was that?”
“Luffy opening his damn mouth,” Nami replied as you followed behind her.
You were wondering how Luffy’s mouth could have anything to do with the current sounds coming from outside. Your response died in your throat the minute you got out onto the deck. You followed them to the stern of the ship and finally saw what was waiting for you all was a very large, very metal, Marine vessel trailing behind you.
All the blood drained from your body and whatever buzz you’d had left over from earlier was now completely gone.
“It’s the marines! We’re under attack!”
Nami rushed to the wheel to begin to try evasive maneuvers to get you all out of the way of the oncoming cannonballs. Another shot rang out from the marine vessel and you waited to be struck by steaming metal and found yourself vaguely relieved when it crashed into the ocean a few feet from you.
“How did they find us?”
“Does it matter? They’re trying to blow us out of the water!”
What the hell were you supposed to do?
What in the hell could anyone do against being shot at by cannons and a marine vessel that was gaining on your small ship by the second. You could see three figures standing at the bow of the ship, eerily watching as if waiting for something - or someone - to appear.
Luffy grabbed the telescope and peered through the lens. You all waited for him to give an order and what he said next surprised everyone.
“Grandpa?”
“Grandpa!”
“Did you just call that guy grandpa?” Zoro asked, his eyes carefully watching Luffy as he glanced through the telescope back at the ship.
He didn’t answer right away. The sound of another shot being fired made all of you space out from one another. You could feel the tension singing through your nerves. The adrenaline was demanding you to move or do something else besides just hopelessly stand like a damn target. The fight or flight in you erupted to life with one key thought hoarding every inch of clarity besides one: run.
This time when the cannon came crashing down it came right at the edge of the stern. An eruption of water covering you in a fine mist of water. You didn’t get a chance to decide on what to do when another shot rang out.
“Hit the deck!”
Usopp’s scream was frantic enough you didn’t ask why, and did as he instructed and became one with the wood. Seconds later, the sound of speeding metal whizzed by you and smashed into the railing behind sending wood fragments everywhere.
You couldn’t stop the scream that tore its way from your lips as your body curled in on itself.
What the hell did I sign up for?
You could hear the sounds of feet clumsily finding their footing again as everyone began to get up. You wanted to stay where you were, but the sharp sound of Zoro calling you a coward resonated inside your chest.
You could do this. You could totally hundred-percent do this.
It was your turn to begin to get up from your place on the stern deck, and just as you moved to your knees someone offered their hand for you to take. Color you shocked when you looked up to find that hand was attached to Zoro. You must have been staring too long because he looked away, hand still out, and grumbled, “You going to keep staring at it or take it?”
Yup, and there was the Zoro you’d grown to know and loathe.
“It just burns you up inside to be so helpful, doesn’t it?”
Your voice oozed with sarcasm as you took his hand - maybe a bit too aggressively - and started to get up. Zoro saw your passive-aggressive hand smack and did you one better. He pulled you quickly to your feet, but that quickness came at the cost of your balance. Your feet couldn’t catch their footing back on the deck and you ended haphazardly colliding into his chest.
As fast as it happened, it was equally as fast that you both dislocated yourselves from each other.
“Is everybody okay?”
“I think so.”
“No. Not okay. Not even close to okay.”
“I second, Usopp,” you said.
You weren’t sure why you raised your hand. It could’ve been you just really needed them to know that no - no, this was definitely not okay.
Luffy took your concerns with a grain of salt, however, and ran over to the cannon - the only cannon - on deck. You’d only just meet him, but Luffy didn’t strike you as someone who held onto any ill will. So, you were surprised to see the determination burn in his eyes and the scowl to cross his face.
What did your grandpa do to you?
If you weren’t mortally in danger of drowning at any minute or being shredded in half by a cannonball, you might have asked.
“Usopp! Fire back at them!”
“Or how about we sail away as fast as we can?”
“I like that idea, actually,” you chimed in, a hand scratching the back of your neck. “That’s a solid plan if I ever heard one, Usopp.”
“Run from the marines?”
Luffy looked between the three of you. He couldn’t believe that Usopp, Nami, and you were apparently so quick to not want to put up much of a fight. You did enjoy not being a sea decoration.
“No. Never! Nami trim the…sail thing. Let’s sink their ship!”
“Wait, what? Are you crazy?”
You had to back up to stand next to Zoro as Luffy waved for Usopp to join him on the stern. The two of them grabbed a hold of the cannon to bring it towards an opening in the back.
“Let’s sink their ship.”
“Luffy, we don’t have time for this!” Nami interjected, but Luffy wasn’t listening. “They’re going to come up alongside us! If they do, we are finished.”
“Our odds keep sounding better and better,” you mumbled as you made your way over to Nami.
“You are our Navigator. Do something.”
Nami let out a groan before her whole demeanor changed. No longer was she trying to flee or get Luffy to see reason. Suddenly, she turned to Zoro and ordered him to go down and pull the sheet in. He didn’t waste a second before he brushed past you and down the stairs.
You waited for her to order you to do something, anything, but she must have known it would’ve been like explaining math to a baby. You didn’t even know what she’d even just asked Zoro to do. Apparently, neither did he.
“Which way is port?”
A heavy sigh left her as she shouted back, “It’s the left!”
“Have you ever loaded a cannon before?”
“Yeah, yeah I’ve loaded tons of them,” Usopp replied coolly.
You had to give Usopp props. He was literally the master of bullshit and could keep a straight face even though you both knew the only thing he loaded was his imagination.
“This is just a different model I’ve never seen before.”
“Usopp, you load the cannon in the barrel. Light it and then get the hell out of the way!”
Following Nami’s directions, Usopp rushed forward towards the barrel. You thought he was going to make it when the ball slipped out of his hand and landed with a heavy thud on the deck. You rushed forward to grab it before it rolled down the stairs, but didn’t notice Usopp rushing to join you in the hunt. What neither of you failed to notice was that the vibration from dropping the cannonball dislodged the others.
In a split second, you and Usopp collided into one another and when you stepped back to stand up your heel caught a ball. You had barely enough seconds to lean yourself forward as you slipped down the stairs, taking each stair with a thud just like the cannonballs.
Your knees slammed into the edge of one of the stairs, but the balls under your hips kept you slipping. You tried bending your knees to slow your descent only to have them successfully bump every step on the way down.
“Oh shit, Doc are you okay?” Usopp shouted down after you.
“I’m fantastic,” you grunted as you came to a stop before the last steps.
You weren’t trying to remove yourself from the stairs. You could feel the pain in your knees growing with each passing second. You were willing to bet when you stood up, that dull throb that was beginning to resonate under your skin would shoot out like lightning the minute you stood up. Unfortunately, you’d forgotten who was at the bottom of the stairs with you.
“Are you going to get up anytime soon or do you enjoy just laying there?”
You were ready to tell Zoro where he could shove his swords when a gruff voice you’d never heard cut over the chaos.
“Pirate vessel, by order of the marines, lower your sails and submit to my authority.”
You were willing to bet a million berries if that man wasn’t Luffy’s grandpa that wouldn’t even be an offer on any table. Ever. The sound of Zoro’s boots coming closer caused you to peel yourself up just enough before he - did he really just step over you?
“Oh, you asshole,” you seethed.
You scrambled to your feet to chase after him when you noticed another cannonball headed straight for the Merry. But where was the sound of the gunpowder? What felt even more unbelievable was what came after.
Sure, Luffy told you he’d eaten a Devil fruit. He’d told you his body was made of rubber but seeing was believing. You watched as Luffy began to inhale air and his body blew up like a…balloon. Luffy was becoming an actual balloon of skin until the cannonball landed in the center of his stomach. He took the entire impact and flung it back at the marine vessel. One minute, you could hear the return fire whistling through the air. The next, you watched as the crow’s nest above the mast exploded and seconds later it came crashing down.
Everything grew silent aboard the Merry as you all registered what you’d just witnessed. You were still staring at Luffy and back to the now very much on fire marine ship when Usopp’s surprised laughter cut through the silence.
“That was amazing! You just saved us!”
“You didn’t tell me you could do that.”
You could feel your own smile slide across your face as the adrenaline began to bleed away. The aftershocks of the thrill of battle - no matter how unsuccessful - left you feeling ready to do it all again. Or take a nap.
You were joining in on the laughter as you looked back at Nami, and at Usopp who was jumping in excitement with Luffy. You looked over at Zoro and found your earlier excitement drained from your body. Sure, you’d seen him smirk and look like the grumpy cat who ate the canary, but you’d never seen him smile.
Sometime during the battle the wind had tussled up his hair making him appear like he’d just woken from a nap. It made him softer, less broody, and the grin that lit up his face actually reached his eyes and scrunched his nose.
It was safer in the village.
You wanted to say the thought was because of what had just happened. Even as Luffy ordered Nami to get you out of the area, you knew it wasn’t because of the danger. Hell, as much as it was a mess of a first battle, the adrenaline of it all was demanding for a release. Maybe you’d be able to use that as an excuse for why your heart was beating so wildly as you watch Zoro run a hand through his hair.
The ship suddenly felt too constricting. It didn’t allow enough space between you and the swordsman who resided on this ship. You tried to shake your head clear of all those thoughts and turned to run after Luffy. You called his name as you carefully took the stairs down after him.
“Something wrong, Doc?”
“No, no,” you waved him off. “I just - I wanted to ask a favor.”
“You can ask me for anything.”
You weren’t sure if you would ever get over how genuine Luffy was. Every word he said to you he meant it. You could probably tell him you needed the sun, and whether physically attainable or not, you knew Luffy would try his absolute best to bring it to you.
Because Luffy was just that kind of Captain.
“Would it be a bother if we stopped at an island? I’m in need of some supplies.”
———————
Luffy didn’t hesitate to say yes to your request to stop at Irkhaven. It only took you all of four seconds to explain what it was, where it was, and why you needed to go before he sent you to Nami to give her the coordinates. While you’d never physically gone with Naan to harvest the ingredients you’d grown up using, she made sure to tell you often how to get there.
Just in case the day came she couldn’t.
What you hadn’t expected as you walked through fields of lavender was to have Zoro trailing behind you.
“How much longer are we going to be out here?”
“Until I have enough of everything to last us a while,” you called over your shoulder.
You didn’t need to look behind you to know Zoro was shooting daggers into the back of your skull. While he hadn’t been happy being volunteered to go with you onto the island, he hadn’t argued with Luffy either.
You stopped midway out of the lavender fields and took out your small knife to begin cutting gently through the stems. After you had a good enough bundle, you sheathed the knife back in its place on your satchel where you reached inside to grab a pre-cut piece of string.
You could still feel Zoro watching you, as you tied the lavender together in a tight bundle.
“I wasn’t aware picking flowers was life-saving medicine.”
This time you did look over at him. Zoro, the strong and proud pirate hunter. The demon, Luffy said was his nickname. Looking at Zoro now, even in an endless field of lavender, he resonated power. You held no doubt he had earned such an intimidating name through grit and blood-soaked swords.
He looked out of place next to you in a place meant for healing and you couldn’t help but wonder if it was more what he projected than who he was. While Luffy told you happily about the scary parts of Zoro (which Luffy by no means actually saw as scary) he’d also mentioned Zoro never went without a specific sword.
Remembering Luffy’s words, your eyes quickly darted down to the white-sheathed katana. If you had to put money on it, that was the one that held a deeper meaning to him. It was the one he clutched the tightest and his hand fell on absentmindedly.
Once you knew the bundle was secure, you playfully poked it in his direction.
“It does heal. It calms the mind and spirit. It creates restful sleep.”
“It stinks.”
“You are absolutely impossible,” you grumbled, your eyes rolling as you turned away from him.
You placed the bundle inside your satchel and started forward. You didn’t need to look back to know that Zoro would be behind you. This time you were leading him towards an eyeline of trees you’d spotted a few feet back. They looked promising to hold green chiretta.
“So, why did Luffy send you with me?”
You came out first from the field and onto a path that was being taken over by the vegetation.
“Because you don’t know how to protect yourself.”
“I can too.”
“A pot doesn’t count.”
You spun on your heels, satchel swinging, and caught it with your forearm just before it swung into your hip. You were pleased to see the unexpected action had caught him by surprise. Not the typical surprise that Usopp, or others, gave where it might be exaggerated or a gasp and step back. No, Zoro’s was the briefest flinch in the corner of his eyes. Blink and you would’ve missed it.
“Hey, that pot kicked ass.”
“You got lucky.”
“Okay, Mosshead, then what do you call this?”
You lightly tapped your cheek to indicate the very noticeable bruise that was just beginning to fade from his left cheek.
“I call that luck.”
You let out a huff as you turned and faced forward. Leading him towards where you needed to go and reminding yourself that you needed to focus on the task at hand. Not Zoro.
“You carry a knife with you but you don’t use it.”
He stated it as a fact. Not a question. Zoro already knew that it wasn’t used for self-defense.
“I use it to treat and clean infected wounds and forage for ingredients.”
“But not for self-defense.”
You found yourself whirling on him again and this time he was prepared. His hand resting on the edge of his sword and hand infamously tucked inside his pocket.
“I’m a doctor, Zoro. I follow Naan’s oath to never do harm to anyone-“
“And what if to help someone - yourself - it meant that you had to take a life to save theirs?”
He’d taken a step towards you. His whole body radiated with an intensity you hadn’t been prepared for. You could feel your muscles straining to stay in place; to not retreat. Zoro had closed what space you’d had between the two of you until all he’d left were a few measly inches.
“I try not to let it come to that.”
“You don’t always get to decide like that, it's not how the world works. You keep thinking like that and you’re going to be a liability.”
Your eyes narrowed in on him and you felt yourself get on your tippy toes without thinking. Your index finger pressed into his stupidly hard chest as you looked up at him.
“It is not a liability to give a shit about people, Zoro. To care about who they are with their own wants and dreams. What makes someone a liability is not knowing who is worth that effort and who isn’t.”
You dropped back down onto your heels and turned to stomp your way into the trees. What did he know? So, you weren’t exactly a swordsman or incredibly stretchy, and while Usopp wasn’t necessarily the bravest man on the planet he was a damn fine shot. Nami could kick ass and was the best navigator. What did you bring to the table?
No. You wouldn’t let him make you think that way.
You hadn’t realized you’d gone farther than intended into the forest of trees until you noticed not only the green chiterra growing all over the sides of them, but also what looked like gold cap mushrooms. One that you knew to be poisonous.
You put it in the back of your mind. You weren’t here to get things to harm people. That wasn’t who you were and you wouldn’t let this newfound journey, or anyone, change that. You unsheathed your knife from your satchel and started carefully scraping off the moss from the bark of the tree.
“I could train you.”
Those four words stopped you mid-scrap. It had been roughly a few minutes - only a few - since you’d both been silent. You expected the rest of your time out here collecting ingredients to go relatively dull with you both pouting in your respective corners. Out of everything you could’ve expected, those four words were most definitely not it.
“Huh?”
God, you really needed to get it together.
Zoro grunted out a, “Fuck me,” before he gave you his full attention.
“I said I could train you. If you want.”
Was it possible that Zoro, the demon pirate hunter, was nervous? You couldn’t believe it, and for that exact reason you didn’t think twice about it. However, you couldn’t pass up the chance to tease him. Just a little.
“Did Roronoa Zoro - the demon pirate hunter - just offer to teach me how to kick ass?”
This whole entire trip was turning into one unexpected thing after another. The last thing you would’ve thought you would earn from your teasing was a grimace, maybe a smirk if you were lucky. Instead, your words generated an actual smile from the demon himself and you were devastated.
“I thought you said you never heard of me?”
Oh, right. He was talking and he needed you to word back. Right. You could do that.
“Luffy,” your voice cracked on your captain's name and you pretended to cough to clear your throat. “Luffy was telling me about the first time you guys met. It was truly a riveting moment.”
“Okay, let’s back up,” you began, your fingers motioning like a wheel. You’d been sitting with Luffy at the table eating breakfast. What had come over you to ask about how he met Zoro was still currently pending investigation. Luckily for you, Luffy wasn’t going to question you on why you wanted to know. “Did you just say you met him tied up inside the marine yard?”
“He’d given himself up. Never told me exactly why he’d done that actually.”
Luffy was perplexed for all of a millisecond before he sank his teeth back into the dry meat in his hand.
“Oh, well I’m sure he was happy you let him down.”
“Actually, he told me to get lost.”
Yup, you were choking on a piece of toast. Luffy just stated it like it was useless information. Not that his first mate didn’t tell him to essentially fuck off during their first meeting.
“He told you to get lost?”
“Yeah, he did.”
“So, why did you even bother staying there? You could’ve just left.”
A smile began to grow on his lips. It wasn’t his usual radiant one that could rival the sun, but a thoughtful one. It told you the memory of meeting Zoro meant something special to Luffy, and it made you regard the interaction a little less harshly.
“I couldn’t just leave him there. Not when he has a dream to fulfill.”
While you were still debating on whether Luffy was a real person, there wasn’t any denying that he searched for the good in people. Whatever it was he’d seen in Zoro told Luffy he was a good guy.
“So,” you drawled out the o, “he told you to get lost and for some reason your brain heard those words as, ‘follow your dreams’.”
“He isn’t a bad guy, Doc. I know Zoro is more than just a pirate hunter with a scary nickname. He is someone with a dream, just like you, and I’m going to make sure he reaches it.”
Looking at Zoro now, you could see what Luffy saw in him. Sure, he was quick to anger and even more quick to say shit without thinking it through, but who wasn’t at times? You had experienced first hand the good that lived inside of him.
He’d helped you when he didn’t have to when you were sick. He shared a part of himself, a small part but still a part, to see who he was underneath all the attitude. While you weren’t in the business of hurting anyone, you debated on whether letting him train you would at least make you useful enough to save other members of your crew - maybe Zoro - if something came up.
You did hit someone with a pot and punch Zoro in his face. What could learning a few moves going to do?
“Alright, demon pirate hunter, I’ll consider it.”
—————————
He wanted to throttle Luffy.
The way you kept looking at him - saying his nickname - was stirring something foreign in his chest. He may not know exactly what it was but he didn’t have too. His body was telling him plainly he should take back his invitation to spend more time alone with you. You were only going to get in the way of his goal.
All of those made sense why he should retract his invitation and head back to the Merry. And yet…
“If it pumps up your ego, I’ll say it as many times as you like. For a price.”
You wiggled your eyebrows at him and it was so unexpected Zoro wanted to laugh. His offer to help train you had been in the back of his mind, but when he went to offer it, it’d gone rougher than he’d intended. He hadn’t meant to make you feel bad - to call you a liability. It wasn’t that he thought you would be an actual liability for Luffy.
You were a liability for him.
The way you were looking at him now, the smile on your face, gave him all the warning he needed to know you were a dangerous wildcard. He’d made a promise to Kuina and you felt like the one thing that could keep him from it.
Whatever the feelings you were stirring in him were something he needed to be wary of. Zoro wasn’t going to have any of it. He made a promise a long time ago and he wasn’t going to let you or anyone else get in the way of him keeping it.
He was so lost in thought that he wasn’t aware you’d gotten so close. It wasn’t until your fingers slid over his ear, placing something behind it, that he was jolted back into the present.
“Oh, shit I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to freak you out.”
Your voice was breathy and sweet with your wide eyes looking up at him with something dangerously close to reverence. Close like at the dinner table. Close like when he’d tumbled out of the well and landed on top of you. Zoro still had the way your body felt under him burned into his memory. One he’d tried to erase with the bottles of liquor that now sat empty inside his room.
His hand moved up to feel what you’d placed behind his ear, and his fingertips were greeted by the soft give of flowers.
“Did you seriously just put flowers in my hair?”
Your response was maddening. Zoro watched as you brought your hands up to join your shrug, as if he wasn’t standing there, flowers now pinched between his fingers.
“I think you look cute.”
Cute.
“Yeah. That’s not me.”
In a show that it wasn’t him, that you and your stupid flower giving were just another nuisance, he opened his fingers and let them fall to the ground. Zoro watched as your eyes that had been brimming with sunshine were darkened by clouds of sadness. Even your earlier giddy step was replaced by slouched shoulders that suddenly looked as if the world weighed heavily on them.
“Okay.”
Your reply was meek. If he wasn’t straining to hear it he would’ve missed it. You didn’t give him another glance or yell at him for being an ass. That was what he had expected; what he was still waiting for. Zoro had known you for a couple of days and within that time came to learn you were the most maddening person he’d ever met - second to Luffy. This? He didn’t like this. He liked it better when you fought back. When you told him what an asshole he was and when you touched him without thinking.
Zoro watched as you went back to gently maneuvering your knife under the bark; skilled hands that removed pieces of that weird-looking fungus. You pulled an empty glass from your bag and, with the same gentleness, pushed it past the lip of the bottle to hold it inside.
Cute.
That’s what she’d called him.
I am not cute. I’m the demon pirate hunter, Roronoa Zoro.
He could feel his jaw flexing at the thought. Cute. Zoro has been called many things in his life, but cute was never one of them. His hand clenched and unclenched on the Wado Ichimonji as if asking - begging - what he should do.
He couldn’t stay here much longer. Zoro didn’t know what to say and you obviously had no intention of speaking to him anytime soon.
“Fuck this,” he whispered as he stalked off back out of the trees.
He made it to the edge of the clearing where the sun fully broke free from the shade of leaves when you called to him.
“Try not to get lost, Zoro. We both know you’ve got shit directional
skills.”
He refused to admit he was happy to hear you say something. Even if that something was your usual shit-talking. Zoro grunted as a reply and quickly went back to walking out of the clearing when something - small and pure white - caught his eye out of his peripherals.
It was huddled against the bark of a tree. Its petals were open and stark against the darkness. It took him a moment to recognize those white petals. What he found amusing was how the flower always seemed to be carrying its own weight on its shoulders; the neck of it dropping down like it’d just received devastating news. Zoro didn’t know why he gently plucked it from its resting spot. He couldn’t explain why after that he turned to head back in your direction.
Zoro was trying to get away from you and here he was bringing a fucking flower back. You turned at his approach, your mouth already forming over some word. You never spoke what it was you wanted to say and you didn’t seem like you wanted to try either.
Zoro placed the snowdrop behind your ear. Perfectly placing it to where the hanging bulb hugged the top of your ear to hang against your hair.
“You left to go find flowers?”
Zoro shook his head. He stepped back just enough to see how it looked. He was a dumbass for doing this.
“No, I was going to head back to the ship-“
“Figures-“
“When I saw this snowdrop by itself,” Zoro continued over you. “It made me think of you.”
“That feels oddly specific.”
He didn’t like how you were looking at him. More accurately, he didn’t like how you looking at him was making him feel.
“It’s a snowdrop. They’re one of the most delicate flowers in the world.”
There it was. The darkening of those previous clouds now cracked to life with the spark of your anger. Zoro had to admit, he enjoyed getting you all riled up. What he wouldn’t tell you, is because they only grew at certain times and usually in the snow, it made them one of the most resilient flowers because they could grow under any conditions.
“Are you calling me delicate?”
A huff left him as his eyes rolled up into the treeline.
“I was trying to apologize earlier.”
“Oh.”
You’d started all that storm building just to deflate but also-
“You sure have a way with words,” he teased.
“My bedside manner is not the best, I’ll admit. I once told a dying man a joke about a pirate and marine having an entanglement. Naan said it probably wasn’t the most appropriate time.”
For some reason, Zoro could picture it. A man dying and you, being your nervous self, trying to make him laugh to ease his passing. The thought of it alone made a smile curl at his lips, and he tried to gently shake it away. To look at anything else but you.
“What do I gotta do to hear one of these world-famous Doc jokes?”
He waited until his face was neutral to look back at you. Both hands rested on his swords as he watched you fill the bottle to the brim and place it securely inside your satchel.
“For that kind of service? You have to be dying.”
“You’re a real pain in the ass, you know that?”
You were a pain in the ass. A pain in his ass. From the moment he met you until now and probably would continue to be. A pain that made him think of things outside of his goal. You made him think past his promise. Who was he if he didn’t keep it? He should’ve never offered to train you or willingly spend more time with you. He was going to have to take it back. It didn’t matter if it hurt your feelings or made you hate him. Maybe that’s what he needed to do to make you hate him-
“What are you doing?”
Zoro prayed that his face was devoid of any emotion. The panic that bloomed in his chest didn’t spread to where you could see. You’d placed your hand over your chest in a way Zoro knew too well.
“I,” it was the first time Zoro ever heard your full name. “Promise to be the biggest pain in your - Roronoa Zoro’s ass - from now until whenever.”
For the second time, his hand was clutching onto the Wado Ichimonji today. While you spoke, Zoro could swear he saw flashes of Kuina standing behind you. The look of disappointment growing on her face.
“You made a promise.”
Zoro couldn’t bring himself to speak. He couldn’t trust what he would say. So, he simply turned back on his heel and made a beeline back for the edge of the trees. This time when he reached it he didn’t stop. He had to get back to the safety of the ship where he could barricade himself from you behind wooden doors and booze because Zoro could really use a drink.
————————-
It has been two days inside the fog. Two days of Zoro avoiding you like you carried the plague back with you from Irkhaven.
When you’d made that promise it was only meant to be good fun. You replayed over in your mind to see if you’d said something wrong - done something wrong to warrant the sudden extreme cold shoulder.
Besides the time you’d been with Nami and Usopp, all of you shared thoughts about the naval battle that had happened and, who could forget, his very real vice-admiral of a grandpa. Who could launch cannonballs like paperweights. After that, Zoro didn’t come around you or close to you.
Sure, you would see him when he lounged on the deck napping like a cat in open spots. Hell, if Zoro wasn’t sleeping he was either drinking or training. You’d catch glimpses of him on the upper deck lifting weights with his arms and, sometimes, his mouth.
The first time you saw him lifting eighty pounds with his teeth, you had about a thousand questions racing through your mind. If you thought he would answer you if you spoke, you might have asked him.
You weren’t sure why it bothered you so much. It shouldn’t have even mattered whether he talked to you or not, but he’d offered to train you. Why bother asking to do something that required his time if he wasn’t willing to give it? These sorts of questions had been your own personal plague since he’d begun to give you the cold shoulder.
You’d been sitting with your legs hanging out of the side of where the cannonball had blown an unfortunate hole through the Merry’s railing. It killed you to see her so broken; her intricate leafling design ruined all because of what felt like a family spat. Letting out a sigh, you pulled your legs out from over the side with a hand holding onto the rail so you didn’t fall into the sea.
Once you were securely standing without fear of going overboard, you wrapped the leather cord that secured the pages of your journal around it. You were just finishing up tucking it in when Usopp began to shout, “I see something.”
How anyone could see anything in this mess was beyond you, but then again Luffy was at the front of the Merry using his nose to guide you guys out of the fog so…yeah. Stranger things could and did happen.
It was enough to garner your attention and bring you walking up to join the rest of the crew that had assembled.
“I see nothing,” you stated.
“I don’t know how anyone could see anything in this soup,” Nami agreed as she stirred the ship in the direction Luffy called.
“You guys don’t see the red lights? How can you not see them?”
“Because, Usopp, I don't have eyes like an Eagle.”
You could feel the happiness your comment brought him as he continued to point in the direction of said light.
“Just keep your eyes posted right here in the center and you’ll see it, Doc.
“3 degrees starboard, Nami and keep it straight.”
“I really wish you wouldn’t sit up there Luffy,” you called up to where he sat, legs wide, on the Merry’s headpiece. “What happens if you slip?”
“You're his crew mate. Not his mother. He doesn’t need you coddling him.”
You turned to find Zoro standing a few feet behind Usopp. He wasn’t looking at you but he’d just spoken to you. His first words in two days and it didn’t surprise you in the least they were his usual asshole tone.
“Oh, so he can speak. What a shocker.”
Zoro side-eyed you but still refused to acknowledge your presence. The soft bruise that was there two days ago at Irkhaven was all but a faded memory. You were tempted to make it a fresh one.
“Okay you two let’s focus on-“ Usopp stopped mid-sentence as his eyes scanned over something in the distance. “What’s a baratie?”
You looked where he was and finally saw it. Red neon was bleeding its way into the fog. It was enough to make you forget about Zoro, your lack of clean clothes, or what had happened the last couple of days. It was land. You were finally going to actually put your feet down on something solid that wasn’t just the Merry.
Nami stirred the Merry in and easily parked it at the next available dock. Immediately, people rushed out to begin tying the ship's ropes to posts to secure it in place.
“Is it just me or does this look like a restaurant?”
You meant your question to be open-ended. To allow anyone to answer in case what you were seeing was in fact a floating restaurant in the middle of the ocean. However, you were leaning against the rail next to Nami, with whom you pressed arm and arm.
“I think it is.”
You were all still staring over the railing when Luffy asked excitedly, “Do you guys know what this means?”
“We stock up on supplies and keep going so the marines can’t find us?”
“We head back to Syrup village where it’s safe?”
“No - let’s go eat!”
You felt the blood drain from your face. You didn’t have much in the way of something to wear at an establishment like this. You were willing to bet you couldn’t just walk in wearing - or smelling - like you all did. You were getting ready to tell Luffy you’d hang back on the ship when you felt a hand gently wrap itself in yours.
Glancing down at your interwoven hands and back up, you found Nami, her lips together in a soft smile, as she gave you a light tug to follow her.
“Come on. You can borrow some of my clothes.”
You let out a raspberry, your hand squeezing hers briefly in relief.
“Nami, you are a lifesaver.”
“That fish better have a bar.”
You weren’t going to say it out loud, but you agreed with Zoro. You were going to need the blissful ignorance of alcohol to make it through a dinner where you possibly ended up sitting next to him.
---------------
As always, thank you so much for reading. Comments and reblogs are welcome.
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Tag list under the cut. PSA. I have been struggling to add those who have asked. Tumblr is being a real douche and allowing me to tag some and not others. Please let me know if I need to follow you or anything like that to tag you. I want everyone who asked to be tagged to be included. Your name might also have been in here twice that because I am struggling.
@thegreatesttttttttt@katiemrty@sorasolarium@ponyboys-sunsets@flowersgirl02@spilled-coffee-cup@instabull@charleslec-airlines@dixonsbugaboo@amanda08319@moony-artemis@iloveautumn1@yoheyyosup@ghostyycat7@csmbrainrot @selmasemlan
@scarletrosesposts @yeetedandoboi @snixx2088 @blobfishyy @sourairi @nerdiestmothman21 @lynnieereads @zerosmilesahead @swthxrry @lovestruck-art @throwmethroughawindow @heyitz-julia @sabrinadelreyy @illusory-segurity @naomihatake @mrs--imperfect @shabzy1644 @fckwritersblock @glaciuswduo @meri-soni-meri-tamanna @fangeekkk @tfamidoingwithmylife @zaphira-san @kieth-reblogging @alotofrandomfangirling @emelia07 @hyrdr0citi @kagatinkita @sarcastic-sourwolf @ponyboys-sunsets @yoong1c0re @humblereaper21 @frankenstein852 @asteroidshowers @lflores2008 @yunho-leeknow @zaphira-san
@hwabae8 @sseleniaa @skzoolove94 @hopefulrascalstatesmantoad @kaykay0315 @geminidas @carlitosainzz @shuujin @sweetstella @blossomedfloweroflove @shiiiii-okayyyy
#Chaos in Their Bones#ongoing series#one piece live action#opla zoro#roronoa zoro#one piece zoro#zoro#zoro x reader#zoro roronoa x reader#roronoa zoro x reader#roronoa zoro x you#one piece#one piece x reader#op zoro#opla zoro x reader#opla fanfiction#one piece fanfiction#frenemies to lovers#slow burn#friends to lovers#mutual pining#reader is referred to as Doc
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Yautja x reader
Part two
Woooo another one baby
Again I suck ass at writing so this is gonna be yet another bucket of paint thrown at a wall and just hope to god it comes out coherent
OK ANYWAY
• you were originally abducted by another alien race. It started out just living your life going to work and coming home rinse, wash and repeat. But you started getting weird little signs that something wasn’t normal. Weird feelings in your head that turned into dizziness that lead to a particularly aggressive fainting spell in your own home.
• you woke up in a metal room. At first you were scared you had been drugged and kidnapped- not far from the truth but you thought it had at worst been traffickers not whatever the hell that thing was staring at you through the glass like door. It was slender small and gray with big eyes.
•you found out that they weren’t actually hostile and just wanted some info on you and some dna. They said they would bring you back home once they were done. But the universe had other plans. The ship was attacked and you among a few of the crew were taken hostage and thrown into cages. You had collars fashioned around your necks and were treated like pets. Or product.
•the ship landed on a strange planet with two suns. It felt arid but off behind the ship was a massive rainforest like place. And in front in a small distance was a city.
•taken into the city you were all being sold off. You tried to fight against the chain and you even bit the giant armored lizard fuck who dared to grab your chin to get a closer look. The kinder aliens who took you to begin with had give you a translator behind your ear. You were able to figure some things out. Like their species; the yautja and the planet.
•you were the last one who had yet to be sold. One yautja in particular came up and asked about you. He was about 7ft, leaner and had darker tones in his scales. Mostly muddied grays and black. The seller went and took off the chain. You still had the collar like mechanism however. As soon as he did you ran. You dodged between people and headed to the forest. They had tried to chase you down and even activated the collars shocking abilities but you kept going. Even after blood ran down your torso from the electric prongs digging into you.
It had been about a day and a half before you made it to an area that looked like a small calm village. There were some homes in the trees and some on the clearing. A cool river that ran maybe a hundred meters or so off to the side. And just up the hill past that river was a small cave. You didn’t know if these people were kind or trust worthy so you didn’t approach. Instead opting to stay in the cave. You fashioned yourself a blade with a very sharp obsidian like black stone, some wood for the handle and a vine to keep it together.
•it did okay. You were able to get small things down on the ground and even found a potato like root you could cook up and eat. The fires you made to cook needed to be small though. You didn’t want to alert anyone that you were there. Although you had a suspicion that they already knew.
•you took up wood carving to pass the time, making animals from your home planet. You went down to the river once and forgot your carving of a deer. When you went to retrieve it, a little yautja had already gotten to it and was inspecting it. It made a rapid little clicky noise and ran back to the village with what looked like excitement. Scared you ran back to your cave.
•unbeknownst to you there was a popular fairytale in the village. They told stories of humans to scare the little ones into behaving at night. And when the little one found the deer carving it certainly made the stories seem more vibrant. The kids made rumors about a big bad scary ooman in the forest. You- would sometimes sit behind rocks/trees and carve away while listening to them.
•they had concluded that the creature was a deer thanks to their parents. Buuut their imaginations went wild. Deer were now giant carnivores who impaled victims on their antlers and wore the corpses like rotting trophies. You giggled at that one. But suddenly everything went silent. Peeking between the two large stones that concealed you the oldest of the young ones was pointing in your direction. You abandoned your carving and very quickly but still quietly headed back to your cave.
•the found your carving. This time it was a fruit bat. Fruit bats can get pretty big on earth. Some with wing spans up to five feet! But they were so cute. They loved fruit and looked like puppies in your eyes. But the kids had once again made wild tales. Tales of giant fire breathing monsters. “Huh..” you sort of muttered under your breath. That one is actually pretty close to home. Not literally but it made you think about the tales of dragons on earth and how maybeeee that’s partially how they got started.
•you started leaving carvings more often. It made you happy to see them play with them and come up with fantastical tales. You would hide and carve and listen as they played. What you didn’t know was high up in the trees above you, was a certain masked individual watching your every move.
•your collar had been outfitted with a tracker. And it was just chance that you went right to the village the one who sought to buy you lived at. When you made it to the tree line they decided to not bother with the chasing. He paid and decided to hunt you. Maybe not kill you but he enjoyed the idea of toying with you. But once he saw you carving he stepped back. He watched. And he watched the children. He watched longer than he intended too.
•a month of this went by. The children now had maybe ten of your little carvings. All of different animals. Deer, bats, dogs, cats, horses, rams, weasels, giraffes, and all sorts. You were currently carving a T-Rex. You were in your cave carving it due to the heavy rain. Wondering where you should leave it for them to find you settled on the same place as the last two, perched on a big roundish but flat stone that was right on shore and in the middle of plain site. You figured you’d just leave it there again. When you placed it on the stone off to your left you heard a little shreek. The Rain was no more than a fine mist but rhe river water was sweeping away the little one. It wasn’t too strong but the rain didn’t help when it made the river just a bit deeper. You ran after the little one and dove in.
•Bringing the small but heavy child back to shore you sat him down. He was fine but startled. Wether it was from the river or you- the mysterious human in the hill everyone jokes about was anyones guess. When he just continued to ogle at you in silence you sighed. Being back and next to the stone you left the dinosaur on you picked it up and handed it to him. Then, hearing a noise in the tree line- you assumed it was his parents and bolted up the hill back to your cave.
•a couple days later you were awoken to some noises outside the cave. Afraid you grabbed your knife and jumped out. The poor little yautja that caused the commotion stumbled back and landed on his butt. Dropping the knife you squatted down to help him. He reached his chubby little hands out. In them was a little basket of fruit :)
•you were tired. So tired. Turns out whatever that fruit was made you extremely sleepy. So, after the little yautja left and the fruit was eaten you decided to take a nap. When you woke up it was dark. You felt around and concluded you were in a pile of furs. Wait- why was it so comfortable? The things you got to make your bed had been crude and hard, soft enough to sleep but not comfort. This was soft and plush. Sitting up quickly you realized you weren’t in your cave anymore.
Looking out the window, you were in the village. Oh boy.
Should I continue this? Is it baD
Please tell me how I could improve this I haven’t written anything since I was like 14 and making fuckin edgy ass creepypasta x reader fanfics on quiz quotev lmAO
#yautja#yautja x reader#predator x reader#yautja x human#predator x human#predator x you#yautja x you#predators
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Jonathan’s line about Steve in vol 2 was so…. I don’t know. I mean yeah it straight up confirms that Nancy and Jonathan make fun of Steve behind his back, and like I get that I have never been in Nancy’s situation so obviously it seems more mortifying to me, but I would have felt so guilty in her place. I can’t imagine not shutting Jonathan up if he started shit talking about Steve. Like Steve would have been straight up unmentionable if I was Nancy. Idk.
I get that Duffers don’t treat their characters emotional lives seriously, but like. That’s why Robin being kind to Nancy in s5 despite Nancy’s uh.. well frankly appalling attitude towards Robin, makes zero sense to me. I really wanted Nancy to struggle being in Steve’s group. Not in the “she deserves it bhahaha” way, but like… Steve dumped his friends for her (which was good for him), and her expecting to get the same treatment and meeting Robin instead? Who actively dislikes her and for a good reason? Who is smart and cool and kind? That’s way more interesting than people kissing Nancy’s ass the whole season, while she is actively putting Max’s life in danger. Like, yeah in high school she is the chief editor of the newspaper, and at home she is the eldest sister, and with Jon she makes fun of Steve, and now none of these people are here, but Steve is here and so is his bestie. And Steve is as kind as always, but Robin dislikes her, and it is not just prejudice
Nancy Wheeler you wild girl! She has no guilt lmao She's like yeah steve was dumb and annoying and didn't enable my investigation, and jon goes yep, what an idiot. All while Steve is just like. bumpin around making friends with little nerds haha. Minding his own business blaming himself for the end of their relationship. You're right, it's kinda bonkers because even if we take the stance that Nancy didn't cheat (which I believe she did) like. she still had him as her second choice and as soon as he pushed back a bit and didn't give her the kind of support she wasn't telling him she needed (until talking about exposing the lab in the library where anyone could hear) she jumped ship and ran to Jonathan. Why would she want to talk about Steve? Why wouldn't she want to try to forget he ever existed as anything other than Mike's friend Dustin's older friend? Is that not weird for her?
(i think you might mean s4? but i can work with s5 too haha) It's so much more compelling to me to have Nancy and Robin at odds with each other because Robin is like a little guard chihuahua holding a grudge for Steve. She holds grudges so well let her do it more!! like jesus give him someone in his corner! And also for herself! She got so nervous and tried to explain and defend herself, and Nancy only really started to listen once they got into the hospital. Nancy has a not great plan that puts one of the kids in danger, one of the kids Steve is close to. (Max wrote him a letter!!) I think Robin would really see Steve's people as her people, even if she wasn't personally close to them she'd still feel comfortable around the younger teens because Steve is? Let robin be critical of this plan. Let her call it out or something. Give Nancy someone to push against, it's no fun if there's no resistance! I want Nancy to be the one wanting friendship with Robin, and Robin not being receptive to it. Nancy not having a relationship handed to her would be refreshing and I want to see how she'd try to win Robin's friendship.
Let Robin not want to work with Nancy because she's heard the rumours about how her and Steve ended, even though he only mentioned that he wasn't a good boyfriend ans wasn't what she needed so it didn't work out. Robin saw that one week Steve and Nancy had a fight, and a day later she was ditching with Jonathan? yeah something is fishy there to even the most socially oblivious person. Let Robin know Steve well enough that she knew he at least thought he was telling the truth but that there must have been more. Let Robin decide she was going to do the most cliche best friend thing and not be very nice to the ex that broke her bestie's heart.
ooooh anon what you're saying is so interesting because, yeah. Steve dumped Tommy and Carol for Nancy, and that was good for him, and then Nancy got with Jonathan who doesn't really have any friends in Hawkins. So she's always been her boyfriend's main person of similar age they're close to. But now Steve's got Robin. Who is funny and kind and weird and loyal and smart and sarcastic. Who is obsessed with Steve and who Steve is also obsessed with. And that, from a s5 stancy pov, is so interesting because now Nancy is now competing (in her mind) for her boyfriend/potential bf's attention with his best friend. Like Jonathan was focused on his family, obviously (and this caused strain for them too) but it's not the same socially as a best friend taking priority. Steve would still hold those relationships, because they're good for him and good for the others, and there's zero reason for him to abandon them this time.
I think Nancy would hate it. Like Steve would obviously give her tonnes of attention, but with him having actual close friendships not just with Robin but Dustin and Max (at least) too, she'd still feel like she was bartering for time with him. That is suuuuch a fun potential dynamic between nancy and steve and also nancy and steve's friends.
#findaanswers#Anonymous#I think an interesting thing about Nancy is she absolutely HATES when her romo partner doesn't back up her crazy schemes#we see it in s2 and s3 it's so interesting to me but I don't really see it talked about.#Nancy wheeler I wanna study you like a bug#stranger things#stranger things meta#nancy wheeler#steve harrington#robin buckley#stobin#sorta? yeah I talk about them enough it counts#stancy#I guess. more fail stancy than not but also just potential dynamic#finda's rambles
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I would like to request a Elf King!Kyle x Human!Princess!Reader. Reader is Cartman's sister and forbids Kyle from liking her.
Thank you <33
Those are super cute Tbh
I have so many Elf King Kyle x human princess reader requests I decided I’d do one post about it
It’s probably gonna take me a sec to write it but I will gladly <333
Elf King Kyle x Human Princess Reader
• When Elf King Kyle saw you, mans was HEAD OVER HEELS, it was love at first sight and he doesn’t even really believe in that
• When you guys first met on business for a peace treaty between the elves and the humans y'all ended up getting distracted and becoming friends
• He really tried being intimidated but it didn't work at all considering his face was a shade of red and he was sweating the whole time. I mean you were in a similar state so it wasn't as bad for Kyle as it probably would've been
• After a while of talking he found out that honestly, you were only on Cartmans side because he was your brother. And even you had to admit, the man was an annoying shit that sometimes you couldn't deal with
• Y'all ended up bonding over your similar feelings towards your brother
• Ofc your meeting ended up being cut short when your brother kept sending messenger after messenger to come get you because he was bored of waiting for you
• When you got back and he heard from his messengers you best believe he started gagging and said that he'd handle the affairs with the elf kingdom now. He can't have his sister having a crush on Kyle!! That's soooooo gross
• He definitely told Kyle that he's forbidden to see the human princess (you) and that it's not allowed for anyone to have crushes on you because he has the stick of truth and its super weird for him. Why it's weird for him specifically no one will ever know
• Obviously that didn't stop Kyle, why would he listen to him?? It's Cartman after all
• This started secret meetings between you guys, it honestly wasn't that hard to sneak out considering your brother snores like a fucking leaf blower
• The elves caught wind of this because duh, it's their kingdom they should know what's happening in it
• So one night before you left the elf kingdom after one of you and Kyle's secret meetings, some elves kidnapped you
• They didn't hurt you in any way it was almost kinda funny because of how bad of a job they did. They tried blindfolding you... but used really really thin fabric you could see out of
• Anyways, for the most part they just questioned you a lot. They kept asking if you had a crush on the king and in general, were shipping you guys
• To be honest, the elves loved you and just wanted a chance to talk to you. At some point they untied you and took off the blindfold so you guys just had a normal conversation
• They really wanted to get to know the girl that their king was so smitten with, that he would talk about her any and EVERY chance he got
• Cartman was definitely pissed when you got home, how he knew you were gone was beyond you. He kept grumbling about how you "smelled of stupid elves" which was really weird
• Yeah no, turns out he just got one of the humans to spy on you and tell him what they saw. Gee, thanks man :rolling eyes:
• Anyways, the secret meetings continued because who the hell was gonna stop you? Definitely not your brother, and y'alls mom thought it was cute so she wasn't gonna try either
• Soon enough, the meetings started turning into unspoken dates before you guys eventually made it official
• Both of you were so obvious it was almost stupid how neither of y'all realized until your individual knights told you
• Stan is definitely Kyle's wing man, no doubt
• Butters and Kenny are probably yours, which is utter chaos but that's for another time
• Honestly, your brother wasn't happy about this but the elves would totally beat his ass for you so he wasn't gonna say anything about it for once
• Kyle (not so) jokingly calls you his elf queen and it's super sweet
My lil Cartman shimeji was staring at me as I wrote this, he's so dang cute <3333
anyways ignore spelling mistakes, shhhh they are not thereeee
#h harleybaby needs help#harley’s anons <33#south park x reader#south park x reader headcanons#south park x y/n#kyle broflovski x y/n#kyle x reader#kyle broflovski x reader#elf king kyle broflovski x reader#stick of truth x reader#harley’s requests!
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“DMTMYHB” [Incorrect Quotes]
A/N: Happy (late) NEW YEARS! So, I know I've been AWOL for a while, but rest assured, the next chapter of “Didn’t mean to make your heart Blue” is still in development, and work has as per fuckin' usual demanded a lot of my time. So, in absence of a new chapter, I decided to fuck around some with the Incorrect Quotes generator. Ended up with some good stuff, especially surrounding Buggy, Reader/Cross Hair, and Shanks' younger selves.
Keep in mind, not everything’s canon/non-canon, it’s just for funzies.
Enjoy!
———
[Reader], to Buggy: “My life is in the hands of an idiot!”
Buggy, motioning to himself and Shanks: “No no no no no, TWO idiots!”
———
Arlong, negotiating with [Reader] while holding Buggy’s head above water: “We have the clown. Give us ten thousand berries and he will be returned to you unharmed.”
Buggy: “Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand berries?”
[Reader]:
Buggy: “MAKE IT ONE MILLION—“
[Reader]: “BUGGY STOP!”
———
[Reader]: “Buggy, keep an eye on Shanks today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.”
Buggy: “Sure, I’d love to see Shanks get punched.”
[Reader]: “Try again.”
Buggy, sighing: “I will stop Shanks from getting punched.”
———
Buggy: “Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night.”
Shanks: “You were flirting with [Reader].”
Buggy: “So what? She’s my partner.”
Shanks: “You asked them if she was single.”
Buggy:
Shanks: “And then you cried when she said she wasn’t.”
———
[Reader]: “Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million berries?”
Buggy: “You stab me, and then when my leg pops back, we buy a big-ass ship!"
Shanks: “You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.”
Buggy: “Good thinking.”
Gol D. Rogers, listening from the sidelines: *increasing concern for his apprentices*
———
[Reader]: “Arlong, my old arch enemy.”
Buggy: “... I thought I was your arch enemy?”
[Reader]: “I have a life outside of you, Buggy.”
Buggy: 😢😢
———
Luffy: “Can you keep a secret?”
[Reader]: “Do you know anything about my life?”
Luffy: “No I do not. Good point.”
———
[Reader]: “Are you sure this is the right direction?”
Buggy: “Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!”
Shanks: “In that case, we're definitely lost.”
———
[Reader]: “You have to apologize to Shanks.”
Buggy: “Fine.”
Buggy: “'Unfuck you' or whatever.”
———
Shanks: “Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?”
Buggy: “I'm a knife.”
[Reader], from across the room: “He’s the little spoon.”
———
[Reader]: “While I’m gone, Buggy, you’re in charge.”
Buggy: “Yes!!!”
[Reader], whispering: “Shanks, you’re secretly in charge.”
Shanks: “Obviously.”
———
[Reader]: “We need a distraction.”
Shanks: “Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?”
Buggy, whispering: “My time has come.”
———
Buggy: “HELP! I TOLD [READER] I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK!”
Shanks, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: “And you thought I could help?”
———
[Reader]: "What do you think Buggy will do for a distraction?"
Shanks: "He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do."
*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*
Shanks: "... or he could do that"
#buggy the clown#buggy one piece#buggy x reader#buggy the clown x reader#one piece live action#one piece x reader#buggy the clown fanfiction#buggy x you#buggy x female reader#one piece#Shanks#red haired shanks#buggy x shanks#DMTMYHB#Didn't mean to make your heart Blue
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Heya! If it’s possible can you write some fluff headcanons of reader x Pomni/Ragatha/Gangle (non poly). You don’t have to do all 3 if that isn’t really your thing. (Sorry if this sounds weird I’m new with requests lol)
Pairings; Pomni/reader, Ragatha/reader, Gangle/reader
Warnings; Cursing, Delusional, suic thoughts
Romantic.
Pomni
, Really nothing will change, If you had read my last post of the ragatha and pomni x reader.
, Pomni enjoy's spending time with you daily, And gives you flowers that she finds outside the circus while searching for an exit.
, She likes to sit at the lakes shore with you at night to get her mind off of escaping digital purgatory
, She WILL chomp on Jax's arm or legs if he tripped you. Rabid dog mode.
, Pomni thinks about a lot of things you both will do in the future, And if she will get separated from you if you both escape. She fears that to the point it makes her not wanna escape, But still is determined to leave and marry you in the future if she can ever find you.
Ragatha
, Once again, I dont think anything will change.
, You both have tea parties in her rooms often to chat about things and hopes for the future.
, If you are the type to cook, She'd eat all your food no matter how ass it tasted.
, Would probably feel like those worn out dolls you'd find in a closet.
, She'd try to lift you up but fail immediately because shes a doll and your not, Unless your a doll aswell.
, She likes to cuddle daily when shes stressed.
, Very supportive and sweet!!
Gangle
, She'd be a very clingy lover.
, She vents to you alot, Like how shes so tired of the bullying and being stuck in a digital hell and how she wants to die for it.
, She likes to watch anime or draw with you, And if you dont know how, she'd gladly teach you!!
, She likes to listen to you rant about your own original characters if your the artistic type of person.
, She'll snap at jax if she ever catches him saying something harmful or doing something to you. Yelling, And probably death threats too.
, Secretly writes and draws ship art of you two.
🎭 🧸 🎪
#digital circus#tadc x reader#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tdi x reader#tadc pomni#tadc jax#tadc gangle#tadc ragatha#x reader#gangle x reader#ragatha x reader#ccaramel candys stuff#pomni x reader
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Led Zeppelin - Whole Lotta Love - Earl's Court 05-24-1975 Part 17
youtube
Okay, listen up people, Zep-heads, Jimbert shippers especially, because this video is un-fucking-believable in so many ways, and all of them good ways and I have a lot to say about it, mmkay? To start out, we have the boys coming out to do an encore, and Robert just...reclines on the platform thingy like the decadent demigod he is and eats whatever he's eating while Bonzo, the most laddish member of the group, in a fluffy robe, no less, declares that he finds football to be "a load of bollocks". Robert, almost certainly the most effeminate member of the group (I guess one might be able to argue that Jimmy - with his delicate features and willowy physique and soft speaking voice - might be a little more effeminate, but that's neither here nor there, the point still stands, and that point is that Robert is a pretty pretty princess), stands right up to defend the sport that he's so passionate about (side note: anyone know why he says "soccer" and not "football"? Because I can't think of another British person who calls it that. The first few times I heard him use it, it was during interviews with American interviewers and/or for American TV shows or publications, so I thought it was just for clarity so they know he's not talking about American football, but this is a concert in Britain with, I'm assuming, a mostly British audience. Anyone know why he calls it that?).
The song kicks off with Robert and Jimmy doing, as I referred to a few days ago on a post featuring a gif from this performance, "backwards humping", or, "the bisexual secret handshake". They are so shameless in their weird ass public courtship display that you might just miss seeing Jonesy's beautiful smile in the background (and if you do, take that video back a few seconds and freaking look at that gorgeous smile. You'll thank me later).
When we get to the first chorus, Robert freaking throws one arm around Jimmy's shoulder, pulling him close to share the microphone, and I shit you not, Jimmy's foot pops. And if that weren't enough, Robert pulls away for a second just to look at Jimmy's face and smile, only to pull him in closer again. Get a room, you dorks. Then when the second chorus comes around, they have the stupidest lovesick smiles on their faces, which are so close together they can probably taste each other's breath. Then Jimmy sort of pushes off with this shoulder nudge and one of them (Jimmy, I think? I sounds like Robert, but Robert's already in the middle of a drawn out vocal, so I think it's Jimmy) gives this soft little grunt/sigh/suspiciously sexual sounding noise. They spend a moment doing a short rendition of (I think?) James Brown's "sex machine" (worth noting/remembering here that Led Zeppelin have their own tribute to James Brown in "The Crunge", a song that gives off all the bisexual energy that's considered safe for human consumption), and then...then...
...we get to the theremin segment. The motherfucking theremin segment. The climax, if you will, of this entire performance. The part where Jimmy and Robert have hardcore sex right there on stage, right there in front of their audience, at least half of whom is probably male, and the vast majority of whom at least claim to be heterosexual, since this is the 1970s and there's very real consequences in store if you're a dude who goes around telling people out loud that one of the main reasons you go to Led Zeppelin concerts is to see and hear obscenely beautiful men fuck each other's brains out. Or even admit that you're aware that's just what's going on on that stage. Yes, this is the part where Jimmy does incredible things with his hands and long slender little fingers that make Robert moan and scream like a particularly horny banshee. Look, there's no getting around it. Even before I shipped it, I had to acknowledge (if in kind of a jokey-jokey way) that, wow, Jimmy is really dedicated to seeing how much and how hard he can make Robert cum. And Robert, in turn, is doing everything he can to let Jimmy know just how much and how hard he's cumming. Which is very much, and very hard. Some things to note are the way Robert not only mimics the sounds that the theremin is making, but also some of Jimmy's gestures, like when Jimmy puts both hands up in the air and then we see Robert doing the same. Meanwhile, the rhythm section are doing their thing, John Paul Jones' bassline providing the sort of bow-chicka-wow-wow type soundtrack to this auditory gay porn. Also, around 5:45, you can hear the bass do something that sounds an awful lot like "Achilles' Last Stand", which at this point hasn't been written yet, but that particular riff has been and will be used in concerts for quite a while before ending up in said homoerotic epic.
What really, really gets me about this performance, though, is what happens at around the six minute point, when Jimmy goes to grab his guitar back from offstage and Robert just has this look on his face. He's saying "ooh, ooh," slowly sauntering in Jimmy's direction, looking straight at him, his eyes filled with what can only be described as pure lust. This part isn't for the audience. Most of the audience can't see Robert's face with the direction he's facing, and those that can are too far away to be able to see it. He's not faking this. He's not pretending to be horny or desperate to be provocative, not in the look he's giving Jimmy, anyway. I'm not sure if the look in his eyes here is one that can be faked. Oh no. He feels it.
And then Robert gets back to singing, "Feel a little lonely, in the middle of the night. I need you darlin', to make things alright." And who is he looking directly at as he sings this? Just take a wild guess.
tl;dr: Robert and Jimmy are about as subtle as a rainbow fireworks display spelling out "WE'RE BISEXUAL DISASTERS IN LOVE"
#Youtube#led zeppelin#robert plant#jimmy page#john bonham#john paul jones#i have thoughts about stuff#just a couple weeks ago i didn't ship it and now i can't not see/hear it everywhere. go figure.#jimbert
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The Walking Dead: Daryl Dixon | S1E1 Thoughts
Okay I am gonna list all my positive and negative thoughts regarding each episode (I know no one asked but I feel like this is the only thing I am somewhat “qualified” to talk about ad nauseam on here).
⚠️ SPOILERS AHEAD ⚠️ do not read below the cut unless you’re okay with spoilers
Positive Thoughts
Norman’s acting is so good like?? Listen we all know he’s not Laurence Olivier and he doesn’t claim to be but goddamnit he nails the subtleties of Daryl’s expressions and conveys his emotions really well I think! I’m very impressed
Daryl hot
Obviously the cinematography, setting, and aesthetics are really cool. It’s both gritty but pretty!! I love the gothic architecture and how OLD everything looks, which is only exacerbated by the apocalyptic feel
Everyone in the cast is so good in terms of acting (well, I mean… Laurent is certainly there but he’s a child so we’ll be lenient)
Daryl hot
The walkers are great as usual. I love the burners. Really interesting! I’m kind of wondering if the “experiments” the people on the ship refer to relate to the burners? Maybe they’re making them like that idk.
I love the religious imagery. We have had cults and stuff in TWDU before but I don’t think we’ve had this Catholic vibe going on. I’m a sucker for anything nun related because I have a weird infatuation with them, so I’m all for it.
DARYL BATHTUB SCENE??? They put that in for the girls and the gays and we are LIVING for it
Daryl hot
Daryl is so reminiscent of early seasons TWD era with his witty lines and snark remarks. I feel like we don’t get to see this side of Daryl very often anymore, but now that he has his own show and is THE main character, we get to see those sides that have been neglected again. I also love how much he sort of scoffs at the nuns and their religion. Atheist Daryl we love to see it
It’s cool seeing people in France dealing with the same things our characters have dealt with since the beginning. It’s interesting to see these new parts of the world in this universe for sure
Daryl hot
I honestly just love thinking about how when Daryl gets home he is gonna have such a crazy ass story to tell everyone! It’s gonna be so cute to see him telling all the kids about how heroic he is and ugh yessss
Daryl deserves his own show. He deserves to be THE main character. People who said he can’t lead a show? Nah. Reconsider
I also love that Daryl MIGHT potentially save the world. Cool asf. And if anyone from the original series should save the world, I think it’s him.
Daryl hot
Negative Thoughts:
Okay. I have some very petty/subjective critiques. I realize a lot of you guys probably disagree with me but that’s okay! Don’t read my negative thoughts if you aren’t prepared to be annoyed with me lol. Once again, a lot of these are super petty/nitpicky
First thing that bothers me is that Daryl says he is from the Commonwealth. No. He is from Alexandria, thank you very much. Well, at least he should be. He should’ve been living at Alexandria imo but the finale didn’t really make it explicitly clear where he was living in that year time jump. Basically I just hate the Commonwealth because I have zero attachment to it and it’s just a stupid ass place that I wanna forget about
Daryl seeing Carol in his haze 🙄 … just annoys me solely because Carol annoys me. They could’ve just shown Judith because that would’ve made more sense to me. But don’t get me started, I don’t even want Carol in season 2. Anyway.
Laurent isn’t terrible but he’s kind of annoying in that “I’m so smart I know everything” way. Just very annoying smart kid at school who everyone hated vibes. Plus I just don’t think it’s realistic that he would be THAT smart just from being raised in a convent of nuns
I also fail to understand what they’re doing with Laurent. Is he just some kid that the nuns think is the messiah or is he ACTUALLY the messiah? Like are they gonna throw in a whole other supernatural religious element? Because Laurent conveniently knows Judith’s line from the finale “you deserve a happy ending too.” Right down to the letter. I find it cheesy as hell because I’m so tired of these blatant in your face parallels that are trying to be clever, which always involve children too like we get it children are basically the duck tape of TWDU. Don’t know what to do for this plot? Throw some kids in there!
Neither Positive nor Negative Thoughts:
I don’t trust the nuns. I think they’re gonna use Daryl to get what they want and they don’t really care about getting him home. Worse, I think it could be possible that Isabelle won’t let him get home. She already tried to keep him from using the radio. I’m not saying I hate her character or anything (I actually like her so far… as long as she stays friendly and not… overly friendly), I just think she’s way too invested in this “messiah” stuff to actually care about Daryl so I fear she will take advantage of him. We shall see.
Ok, those are pretty much all of my thoughts!
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I need everyone to look me in the eye and explain to me with no bullshit why they think that Diavolo x Doppio is proship. Abusive and/or toxic? Potentially- still not proship. And I swear to God if your only reasoning for this is that they're alters in the same body and/or in the same system I need you to sit down right in front of me, better yet lay down and listen to me very carefully.
Being in the same body/system does not equate to being related in any way. I've seen people say that "Doppio and Diavolo are brothers!" No they're not. They're two alters in a system. Similarly, I've seen other people say that - and this is even stranger because where they got this from I have no clue- Diavolo is also Doppio's dad like he's Trish's. No, he's not. They're alters in a system. Even if we go based on canon and throw fanon and headcannons out the window, their relationship outside of being the Boss and his right-hand man is never specified. Literally all we have to go on is that Doppio is comforted by Diavolo's presence and that Diavolo refers to him almost exclusively with words of endearment. This could be platonic, sure. Familial? Possible, but highly unlikely.
I'm not saying that alters in a system can't be related. The alters that our brains cook up can be anything, and familial relationships between alters is a thing. But specifically in the case of Diavolo and Doppio, this is never stated. Therefore, while you are allowed to headcanon them as such, do not force that headcanon onto others when it's not true in the source media.
And if you think that DiaDop is proship because it's an in-system relationship, buddy do I have news for you. Alters have in-system relationships all the time. I, myself, am in an in-system relationship with the Sheila E in our system. Another friend of ours has an in-system relationship in their system. System friends that I knew before that we don't talk to anymore had in-system relationships, and I've seen other systems online talk about their own in-system relationships.
If your only problem with DiaDop is that they're in the same body/system, I can only assume you're a singlet and to that I say:
Fuck off. If you don't know enough about how systems work, you don't get to make that decision. Especially if the decision in question is accusing a harmless ship of being incestuous or pedophilic. Which- by the way- they're both adults! It would be a different story if one of them were underage even in the same system, but they are both grown ass adults! Even with the changes in their body between them fronting, Doppio is described to be a young adult!
And lastly, if your only other reason for accusing DiaDop of being proship is because you don't like it and have some need to justify that dislike? I think you need to do some introspection. I mean this in the best possible way, but if you feel like you have to justify your discomfort for something as small as a pairing of fictional characters, you might want to look in the mirror and ask yourself why that's the case. Especially if you're going to the lengths of accusing that fictional pairing of being proship.
This whole next bit is gonna be my personal thoughts- but might I just add that the whole thing of Doppio's comfort in Diavolo's presence or on "calls" with him and Diavolo calling him "My Sweet Doppio" and other such things really feels to me like implied romance. Especially in the only Jojo part (other than SBR) with canonical queer representation (SquaTizi and Sorlato), it's a bit hard to ignore, in my opinion!
Anyway, I've seen people be weird about DiaDop for a while now and I was just gonna hold my tongue, but the more I thought about why they would think that the more I realized that it's all singlets who just don't understands systems and assume they can talk for all of us. It pissed me off, so here I am.
If there's any reason to call DiaDop proship that I haven't debunked, please enlighten me. But otherwise? Shut up.
#jjba#jojo's bizarre adventure#jojo no kimyou na bouken#jojo part 5#golden wind#vento aureo#jjba part 5#jjba golden wind#jjba vento auero#jojo diavolo#diavolo jjba#diavolo#diavolo jojo#jjba diavolo#doppio jojo#doppio#jjba doppio#vinegar doppio#diavolo x doppio#diadop#doppio x diavolo
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modern-ish things I would like to show dishonored characters
I got inspired by this lovely post by @dogg-teethh and kinda made my own thing but with dishonored protagonists and some side characters so, low and behold
Daud
blues music in general, he would enjoy brooding while listening, and Fleetwood Mac
thriller movies, can't abide the mysteries so would be glued to the screen until the very end. would get mad if it ends on unexplainable cliffhanger
radio dramas, something to fill the silence while doing paperwork
antidepressants, no comments
rope bondage, but not in a sexual way (yeah, I've seen it in ff and thought, yep, seems like his thing)
Corvo
90s fashion, a bit awkward but appealing somehow?
David Bowie, that's so specific? complex and diverse but funky
takeout food, he doesn't really cook, has terrible eating behavior and just plainly starvs when there no food around, so that would be helpful
absurdism, whole "acceptance without humility" thing? i dunno
Lord of the Rings, a small hero with a great burden and greater stakes, it would resonate
Emily
punk rock, 80s pop, industrial and Corvo would also show her "Rebel Rebel", she would vibe with it
Satoshi Kon's movies, great female characters and a bit of insanity
comics, variety of styles and stories to tell! she did enjoy drawing while she was younger, maybe it would inspire her to pick a pencil again
asian cuisine, a lot of different flavours, I wonder how she would like it
marine biology, so much info about whales and other weird ocean creatures, again little Emily would be so happy
headphones, she would feel even cooler while jumping from one roof to another and kicking asses
Billie
airplanes, speed, freedom and views! you are already a captain of the ship, time to tame the sky!
anarchism, yeah, fuck the government!
family therapy, grab your old man by the hand and fucking go, you need it, it wouldn't be easy but please
Killing Eve
heavy metal music and jazz, Emily and Corvo approve. Daud, well, tolerates, it's a bit too much for him
Outsider
video games, all kinds of it!
DnD, especially GM role, you don't have to be a god to feel a little bit like one, and he also has this dramatic side it would def suite him
sci-fi and horror genres
techno, ambient and modern classical music
programming and hacking, he's a nosy young man, he'd like to know all your secrets, and it's just fun ehehe
Delilah
big fashion shows for stylish and powerful lady
therapy, again, no comments
expensive cars that people own and don't drive
Florence + the Machine and MARINA
iPad, Apple pencil and some software for drawing digitally
social media
#dishonored#dishonored 2#daud#corvo attano#emily kaldwin#billie lurk#the outsider#delilah copperspoon#if you have something else in mind please share it would be so interesting to see what others think!#corvo and daud predictably were the easy ones#then emily and the outsider were alright#and in the end i struggled with billie and delilah#but i was adamant on including them all so yeah#a good half of these things might be too specific#i don't have access to my drawing tablet so i entertain myself by writing silly little posts
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Percy Jackson/Heroes of Olympus thoughts
The only things I liked about Rick Riordan books(though to be fair I stopped reading once we got to the Roman versions part, lost interest):
Artemis and her bad ass team of immortal huntresses
Luke Castellan( Luke and his mom deserved so much fucking better than what they got. And honestly I would have chosen his side of the war. The gods suck! But I wouldn't have listened to Kronos either)
Zoë Nightshade(Her death hurt so much!)
Nico and Bianca Di Abngelo(but I hate what they mean for Hades and Persephone's relationship. No way in HELL would Hades cheat!)
Rachel Elizabeth Dare( so ship her with Percy. Hate how she ended up in the books and I over all hate book Annabeth). She was so badass! She threw a hairbrush at Luke/Kronos and lived! A normal human running with demigods and was an artist!!! Loved her. I hate hate! What they did to her in the books.
Hades! I love love Hades in the books. His whole story with Nico and Bianca made me so sad. But at the same time HE WOULD NEVER CHEAT ON PERSEPHONE FOR ANYTHING!!!
Hestia, she was so adorable and cool! I loved her!
Calypso(again I stopped reading after the first Roman gods version book. I lost interest so this is all my knowledge of her and ships) her whole storyline with Percy and her island made so fucking sad. And I wanted Percy to stay with her so bad! I know he wouldn't but god the pain!
Thalia Grace(you can just tell that Titans Curse and The Battle of the Labyrinth were my favorite books out of the whole series) she's badass and than becomes a badass Huntress of Artemis.
Daedalus(I had a weird crush on him in the book. Not gonna lie) his over all story was my favorite of The Battle of the Labyrinth. So tragic and sad. I just really love his character.
Percy Jackson. He was a loveable idiot. Gave me so many Ariel vibes. Hated him with Annabeth soooo much. Would ship him with basically anyone else! Anyone! But while reading the books I hard core shipped him with Rachel very badly.
And those were the only things I liked about the books. Over all the books quickly made me lose interest. Especially when the Roman god versions came in. Plus too many characters I didn't care about to keep track of. The gods besides the ones I listed all fucking sucked. What happened to the kids and teens were so unfair and the way the mythology is written is so messed up at times.
(Don't like don't read. Post hate and I'll block you)
#anti rick riordan#books#my thoughts#feminist#feminism#Don't like don't read. Post hate and I'll block you#greek mythology#mythology#anti percabeth#anti annabeth chase
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20 Questions for Fic Writers [DRUNK EDITION]
Okay so…
I was tagged by @yourfavoritefridge and answered all of these questions while very drunk last night and for reasons I’ve decided to just give you those answers.
{Obviously I wasn’t sober enough to format it with links and stuff so I have done a little after the fact but I’ll just mark all my sober updates with these fancy ass brackets, but for the most part, I left my drunk answers unaltered and did not elaborate. ENJOY!}
1.) How many works do you have on ao3?
28 [Holy shit]
{technically 29 now}
2.) What's your ao3 word count?
380,7555 [feels fake] {and not a number…}
{also it’s 380,918 now}
3.) What fandoms do you write for?
Apart from the first fic [which we will talk about in Q19] Star Wars
4.) What are your top five fics by kudos?
Haunted Heart {293 kudos | Anakin falls for the charming ghost haunting his house} {when I tell you I thought this fic would have less hits than it has kudos when I first posted it…}
Bound and Broken {252 kudos | Satine helps Obi-Wan through his trauma following the events of Kadavo }
I’ll Fall For You If… {241 kudos | Bartender Anakin helps widower Obi-Wan set up his dating profile}
Go Fuck Yourself Obi-Wan [WHAT THE FUCK!? I love you freaks] {239 kudos | When a young padawan Kenobi finds himself in the future, Obi-Wan gets to know himself on a… deeper level}
Your Highness {237 kudos | Obi-Wan and Satine during the year on the run. The beginning of a long running series}
5.) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Not recently, and I’m trying really hard not to feel bad about it. MORE WHEN YOURE SOBER
6.) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Bound and Broken or Haunted Heart
HonorableM: Curiosity Killed the Commander & Homecoming
7.) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
The Resolute Theater Presents
8.) Do you get hate on fics?
Not really? I’ve gotten the errant comment here and there, there has been a lot of asks about getting back to EIYWT which… ANSWER WHEN YOURE SOBER
9.) Do you write smut? If so what kind?
I love this question.
It’s the weirdest question.
I know a few other mutuals have pointed it out, and I want to be clear, I don’t mean it in a bad way, but this is a weird question in a way that I LOVE.
YES.
Yes, I write smut.
It’s pretty much all I write…
But WHAT KIND???
Oh fuck.
I write the kind of smut that will make you squirm in your seat and chew your lip as tears stream down your flushed cheeks.
I will make you feel things, and then I WILL MAKE YOU FEEL THINGS
{I’m fine. This is fine}
10.) Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
Have not.
Have considered X-Files x Star Wars but I think that’s more of an AU than a crossover
[in case anyone is interested]
11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I’m aware of!
12.) Have you ever had a fic translated?
I don’t think so, but I mean— That would be incredible
13.) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
ANSWER WHEN YOURE SOBER
14.) What's your all time favorite ship?
ALL TIME!?
I don’t fucking know, ANSWER SOBER
15.) What's a WIP you'd like to finish, but doubt you ever will?
This question makes me itchy. SKIP
16.) What are your writing strengths?
I think I'm still finding them. And I mean that in the best way.
I think maybe my strength is that I’m learning to just write the way I write?
I’m finding a way to tell the stories I’ve always heard in my mind and to my absoltute fucking astonishment — there are people who like the stories in my head…
I’m learning to ignore everything I ever learned about writing. I’m learning to just listen to that weird rhythm that has always been in my head and just TELL THE FUCKING STORY [sometimes literally] {gods I hate myself}
I don’t know.
I think…
I think I’m a good story teller.
I think I can tell a complete story, both short and long.
I think I’ve always been able to do this — usually out loud, I’m very good at giving speeches and entertaining people but I’ve always been good at telling stories. Nothing frustrates me more than a poorly told drunken shenanigan, or a wedding speech with bad story structure…
Okay this is getting pretentious
READ THIS WHEN YOURE SOBER
ANYWAY
Yeah… even though I’ve written stories with open endings, stories that could have a follow up, stories that leave you wanting more — they’re all still complete stories. You don’t NEED to know more, you can imagine the rest yourself.
And isn’t that the best part?
17.) What are your writing weaknesses?
I’m sure I have a lot.
I choose not to think about them…
…
That’s not true but if I think about it too might I’ll tear myself apart so I’m gonna say that I’m a terrible speller and MOVE ON
18.) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
I am not at all confident enough for this.
Fictional or not.
I mean, I’m totally into it! I’ll read it all day!
I’m not confident enough to write it [myself]
19.) First fandom you wrote for?
WOLF 359!!!
YOU GUYS!
THIS AUDIODRAMA WILL BREAK YOUR HEART
AND THE FIRST THING I EVER WROTE WAS A THREESOME WITH A FUCKING CENTIENT SPACESTATION AND TWO OF HER CREW AND I AM STILL VERY PROUd oh fuck I just realized caps lock was still on I’m gonna… yeah okay.
^^^READ SOBER
{the fic in question}
20.) Favorite fic you've ever written?
Fuck me,
Um.
Probably Haunted Heart. {I still think about this fic on a daily basis…}
BUT
Can I shout out another fic I’m really proud of?
A Very Strange Time in My Life {a really short, really weird first person story loosely inspired by Fight Club}
{well folks… I hope you enjoyed this weird look into my drunk brain!}
#the things i do for internet approval#honestly#20 questions#writer questions#drunk answers#ask game
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Seven Nights At Soma's
In which in a sci-fi AU, you're the new communications officer at the Beach, one of Hatter's luxury space cruises. As part of your training, every day you receive tapes from an old employee explaining the ins and outs of the ship. However, it's not long until things start to sound... off.
Disclaimer: I mention several canon AiB characters in this, but rest assured that they aren't based on anyone's portrayal of them, only on my own interpretation.
Day 1: Slate 1 - 15/09/2023
Good morning! Or good evening, or good night. I’m not sure when you’re hearing this tape but I hope you decided to listen to it first thing after you woke up, mainly because it’s gonna help you get through the day.
First off, let me give you the obligatory greeting (I’m reading this from a card I’ve got right here, so don’t mind me if I sound too weird):
Welcome to the Beach! Combining classic elegance and cutting-edge innovation, our space cruises offer the latest in comfort, gastronomy, innovation, entertainment and onboard experience. Our new and improved spaceships are also pushing the boundaries of sustainable tourism, by employing robotic assistants as personnel so as to focus on environmental well-being and minimising waste…
Sorry, sorry, I had to cut that short because I’m starting to laugh. Assistants, more like ASS-istants, am I right? Haha, yeah, it’s a funny word.
Anyways, yeah, I’m supposed to give you a rundown on your new job, although it isn’t precisely new, is it? Hatter told me he was thinking of filling the vacancy with someone who already worked here, but since I’m the vacancy, I’m not sure whether he ended up doing that or he simply hired someone new. Still, I figured you’d need some help, so I made you these tapes. Seven, one per day, which would cover the amount of time we need to get out of the Milky Way and into another galaxy, and after that you’ll literally be on your own. Well, I’ve only just recorded the one, so maybe I’m here saying it’s gonna be seven but it ends up being three, I don’t know. I guess we’ll see! Man, I’m more excited about this than you probably are, haha.
As I told you before, I’m the guy you’re replacing. I was actually the ship doctor, but the previous communications officer left, so I had to replace him. Doing both jobs and only getting paid for one, which is pretty rough, but hey, we gotta do what we gotta do. You know how in the Barbie movie, Ken’s job was ‘beach’? Well, mine is doctor and comms officer, haha. I was actually friends with the guy that left, and I imagine I must’ve spent so much time hanging out with him that Hatter thought some knowledge passed on to me. I have to say, this ship mostly runs itself, so I didn’t have much trouble. And you won’t either!
Anyways, yeah, let’s talk about the elephant in the room and get it over with. You’re on a cruise where the vast majority of personnel are robots. It’s more efficient that way; as I said in the presentation, ‘environmental well-being and minimising waste’. There’s so many I’m not even sure I know all their names, but to be honest, they’re not gonna bother you much. So, how about instead we run over some of the people you’ll be working with?
First off, since you’re a comms officer, you’ll sadly have to keep in touch with Chishiya, who’s in charge of logistics. He’s, excuse my French, a huge ass bitch. Yeah, that’ll make more sense when you meet him, but mark my words, you’re gonna hate the guy. I did, so it makes sense that you will too. I don’t wanna keep talking about him, so let’s move on.
Oh, these aren't employees but I figure you could say hello to them since they're pretty nice. Arisu and Usagi are this couple who've been together for what seems like forever and they're so cute. You can feel the love radiating from them, it's like they were made for each other. They are so, so sweet; talking to them always brightened up my day. Sometimes I got claustrophobic here, and when that happened I usually went to them to cheer up. They… I don't know, this might sound stupid, but they reminded me that there's more things to life other than a job.
You also have Kuina, who is an absolute sweetheart. She’s head of security, but she’s always super willing to help out if you need anything and she isn’t busy. Fortunately for her, this is a pretty tranquil ship; problems rarely arise here, at least the violent types. There hasn’t been any fights breaking out in… months? Probably even longer, yeah. Between you and me, I think the passengers are scared of doing something illegal in the presence of robots. They think they’re gonna bug out or something and accidentally kill them. Boy, Five Nights At Freddy’s really did a number on you all, huh? But yeah, Kuina. She trains once every three days, which means you'll get to see her. I recommend you go talk to her, but be careful not to bother her while she's training! Talking to her impacted me a lot, made me consider a lot of things about my life, plus, she’s very welcoming and one of the best people here. A literal ray of sunshine.
Oh, God, it sounds like I have a crush, doesn’t it? Haha, no, no, it’s not like that. Well… no, not really. Now you’ve got me flustered, though. I guess I’m ending the tape here, then. I’ll see you tomorrow!
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For the ask game: Butters! I can't decide on which questions so... all of them! (Or how ever many you feel like answering.)
oh this should be fun-
My first interpretation of them
Honestly I just felt bad for him. I basically knew him as the kid who got grounded all the time and he seemed sweet enough, he was actually one of my faves from the beginning haha
2. When I think I started to truly like him
Honestly the Fun With Veal episode. And in the Butters’ Bottom Bitch episode where he just kept going ‘do you know what I am saying?’ I just thought it was funny lol
3. A song that reminds me of them
(Kinda a joint one) but You and Me (But Mostly Me) from Book of Mormon is SO Butters and Cartman. Also The Weight of Us by Sanders Bohlke.
4. How many people I ship them with
I don’t really do ships lol, I liked him and Charlotte tho, they seemed cute.
5. My favorite ship of them
Probably him and Charlotte
6. My least favorite ship of them
Him and Cartman. Absolutely him and Cartman.
7. A quote of them I remember
“I’d rather be a crying little pussy than a faggy goth kid anyway.”
8, My favorite outfit on them
Professor Chaos or his Stick of Truth costume
9. My least favorite outfit on them
The bear suit Paris Hilton made him wear in Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset. I felt awful for him
10. Describe the character in one sentence
Sunshine boy with horrible family members
11. What’s the first thing I think fo when I think of this character?
His accent. I dunno, I just have a knack for remembering stuff like that lol-I could honestly just listen to his voice all day, it’s soothing for me
12. Sexuality hdc!
I’m torn between him being pan and being straight lol, but I do think he’s on the ace spectrum.
13. My favorite friendship they have
Him and Kenny. Definitely
14. Best storyline they had
Butters’ Very Own Episode. I felt bad for him but it’s one of my favorite episodes
15. Worst storyline they had
Probably in the earlier seasons when he was just used as Kenny’s counterpart for the shows punching bag. Idk, it just felt like he didn’t really have any character or personality back then
16. A childhood headcanon
He lived on a farm for a little bit when he was a baby. They moved from Hawaii to say Oklahoma, then to South Park when he was three. Hence the accent. He also had a pet chick up until he was 7 or so named Toast. His parents made him give the chick away tho
17. What do you think their first word was?
Probably just mama or something. I do have a headcanon he still calls his mom (or his unofficial mother figure) mama sometimes.
18. How do I think he was as a kid?
He was probably really hyper. He subdued when he got older tho because his parents kept grounding him for accidentally breaking stuff when he would run around
19. The most random ship I’ve seen with this character
Butters x Craig. Like ???? They never interacted in the show lol-
20. A weird headcanon
Butters has a huge sweet tooth and if there’s candy or sweets in his vicinity he’ll devour it in an instant and likely suffer from a bellyache later
21. When do I think they were at his happiest?
Probably when he moved out and went to college tbh. He was just happy to get away from his toxic ass family. Or when his grandma finally dies.
22. When do I think he was at his lowest?
I do headcanon that when he’s in middle school he finally snaps. He becomes angry and kinda becomes a bully because he doesn’t feel like he has anyone who cares about him, it’s probably only for a few days at most but he just snaps at everyone, makes fun of everything everyone does, but after a few days Kenny (and maybe Cartman or Kyle) kinda confronts him and he ends up apologizing and trying to find someone to talk to.
23. Future headcanon
I wanna imagine that he lives on a farm, he has a bunch of chickens and goats (his favs) and some cows, pigs, even ducks. He gets a pet dog (a Border Collie) named Waffles. He kinda owns a petting zoo of sorts where younger kids just stop by and he educated them about animals and stuff. He also owns a bakery. He names it ‘Buttery Bliss’ or something
24. What do you think i’d a secret they’ve never told anyone?
Probably the thing with his sphincter and how he has to wear diapers in school sometimes. He probably only told AWESOM-O because he thought it was just a robot. But after that he didn’t tell anyone because he would definitely get made fun of :(
25. When do I think he’s acted the most ooc
Probably in The Worldwide Privacy Tour. Kyle even said ‘this is really out of character for you, Butters.’ so probably that lol, or in Going Native. I mean he literally wanted to kill a bunch of innocent people
26. When do I think they were being “themselves” the most?
Honestly? Probably when he was singing the Loo Loo Loo song, it kinda just showed his cuter side. Or in Cartman Sucks when his parents sent him to the Pray teh Gay Away camp because he was just so oblivious to where he was but still stood up for himself and his friends in the end
27. If they could meet a certain character from a different show/movie/book, who would be the most fun for them to meet?
Hello kitty. This kid would be in HEAVEN if Hello kitty was real. Either Hello kitty or Tails the Fox. Him and Tails are pretty similar. Plus fluffy fox meets sunshine boy, they’d get along-or just him in the pokémon world. Yes.
28. The most unnecessary thing they ever did?
Probably when he was trying to get the Hawaiian tourists killed in war
29. How do I think they’d be as a parent?
Honestly? He spoils the shit out of his kids. He’s a huge pushover, but not to the point where his kids become spoiled brats. He probably exposes them to animals early so he could get them to know what’s good and what isn’t when on the farm. He supports his children, but he’s probably a very sheltering parent if that makes sense. Has no idea what he’s doing at first but eventually gets the hang of it. He loves playing make believe with them, would totally play dress up and such.
30. The funniest scene they ever had?
When he’s Professor Chaos and trying to be all menacing and Dougie has to keep telling him the Simpsons already did his idea and he’s just like ‘aw hamburgers :(‘
Hope this is good!
#south park#butters stotch#leopold ‘butters’ stotch#butters leopold stotch#butters stotch headcanons#south park headcanons#character ask game#skipper speaks#headcanons
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Ooc:
AM I YAPPIN ABT YOUNG NEIL HEADCANNONS INSTEAD OF WORKING OR SLEEPING?! YEAHH LETS FUCKIN GOOOOOOOOOOOO
If you fucking know me or see my ACC (and my other blog accs) yk I love the OG ships like jophen/ startech (joseph x stephen) mobillce (mobile x wallace) and maybe a few other non-cannon ships like kimona (Kim x romona) and...fuck idk the ship name for hollie x roxie or Kim x Lisa but yeah those too. For neil, personally, I'm a nordegrim shipper :)) Sorry, neilphen fans :((
Since I imagine he's still on collage I assume he's taking sonthing/ changed courses into somthing more...movie thing? Idk. Mainly working with cameras, screen writing, anything movie based or whatever
Since for Joe I made him Hispanic, other scott as Chinese, I don't really know what to do for the quirky silly little guy like neil. Gimme some ideas if y'all ever see this
Has attachment issues. Or fear of being left alone or not included
He has eczema that flairs up during the winter. Sometimes, he cries silently because of how itchy he is and doesn't like the cream the doctors told him to use because it's a weird texture he isn't comfortable with
Whenever stephen is back home from work, they usually sit down and watch movies together or during dinner. Young neil yaps about a movie, and stephen replies with a dry and simple "mhm, " "yeah", "that's cool -" and sometimes the occasional questions. Neil doesn't mind since he knows stephen is tired
He sometimes steals money from stephen but not all the time. He pays stephen back quickly by making some dinner (that he fucked up)
Favorite games have to be anything RPG based and zelda. Maybe he also got into the virtual world hype like UB funkies, webkinz, neopets, or club penguin (mainly UB funkies)
If he dose have a job I imagine he'd work at the second cup just to hang out with Stacy more, maybe a comic book store, or at no account video with Kim so he can watch more movies for free
I imagine his interest related friends has to be hollie (bc I see hollie also being a cinaphile), Joseph (because he wants to learn how to operate cameras and stuff and make it look cool by editing) and Jimmy (fellow zelda and starwars fan)
He has acne/ acne scars and back acne (I think that's the term) and he always picks/scratches at it
Speaking of picking. He always picks at his fingers and sometimes peels off a good chunk to the point it is bleeding bad, so he has bandaids on his hands and fingers most of the time. He doesn't mind which sorta bandaid. He likes the colorful ones that have like a character on it, but he worries if he might be too distracting for him when he's in class
I love how ironic it is for him to wear a heart on his sleeve sorta shirt even though he doesn't really show his feelings that often. He has the same ass stare all the time, and I think it's silly. So I just imagine he would say whatever is in his head without second thought, or he would mumble it if he thinks it's weird. So whenever he talks about his feelings, like how he feels about the whole "band abandoning him" situation, he actually means It and doesn't really hide it at all.
Steph (Neil's older sister) got him a pair of headphones bc thier parents were always fighting and a Walkman so he can listen to some music. He still uses those headphones to this day even though their broken in half, the sound quality is terrible and the ear puff thingy is crumbling
Whenever he goes out to the mall or out with anyone, he either has his hands in his pocket or out, bc someone has to grab onto his wrist so he wouldn't stop and stare at things (it's mainly Stephen and Kim who has to grip onto his wrist and drag him along. He dont mind tho :/ meanwhile stacy just holds onto his hand and stares with him)
Whenever stephen has a day off and he sees neil playing video games, he asks neil if he finishes his homework. If neil says no, stephen takes away his Gameboy color, keep it in his room and tell him to do his homework. If yes then stephen would just shrug it off, ruffle his hair up and say "ight, cool"
Neil was probably the first to find out that stephen was gay when stephen brought Joseph over (make of that as you will)
He writes movie reviews online and hopes people will see em but his writing skills are ass and he just describes whatever he can and think "yeah that's good enough"
Stephen treats neil like family since well, steph (Neil's older sister) isn't in contact with him that much. And because of the name similarities, neil just treats stephen like steph
His "stuffy" are those hot rubber water bottles (I forgor the name but you pour hot water into them and they help you with cramps and aches and shit-) with a wool sleeve wrapped around it
Since this rp acc is a bit related to the stephen acc. He likes bone crusher a lot! Since he mainly stays home, he has a new buddy to talk to and hang out with. But he leaves all the chores to stephen like cleaning out the litter box or something
Ever since he found out stephen had a cat he was pissed that stephen named the cat "bone crusher" not Link, Skull Kid,Meowth,Litten or Shinx or somthing cool like that but he continues to call bone crusher, bone crusher.
He has a bike and takes it to his college campus. He has the gear for it, too. Helmet, knee pads, elbow pads, and gloves. Stephen said if he doesn't wear em he'll get into an accident, and that scared neil
Idk why, but i imagine him being the type to collect... something! Maybe anything to fill up his already messy room!
He's a maximalist (I think that's how you spell it), as you can see from his room
OUGHHH, I CAN'T CHOOSE BETWEEN MAKING NEIL A DEMI BOY OR MAKING NEIL TRANS FTM AJXJWJXKWKXKWKKXKS
I imagine he has those window markers to doodle on his window or to doodle out ideas for another screen play
I imagine him and Stacy are pretty much on the platonic and cute relationship wise. Holding hands, cuddling all that sorta stuff and stacy likes to listen to Neil's rambles about movies and how good/bad they are
Neil likes it whenever he receives gifts :DDD and tries to pay back by acts of service or something idk. Even if it's his birthday or Christmas he makes sure he owes everybody a equal amount. For example (*COUGH COUGH* DS SITUATION) he's gotta pay back stephen by taking care of bone crusher for a day maybe, doing Stephen's chores and stuff
Not a neil headcannon but I imagine stacy trying to watch the movies neil recommend her so she can catch up and talk to neil abt it and I think it's really cute and sweet :DDD
Yk damn well he's got a BIG ASS forehead underneath all that hair. Justin Bieber lookin ah. No wonder why young neil is Canadian/j
Also not a neil headcannon. But I imagine everyone calling stephen, STEVEN (IDK HOW STEPHENS NAME IS PRONOUNCED. IS IT STEVEN OR STEPH-EM WJKDWKDJWN) that includes neil but Joseph calls stephen by his last name (stills) (joseph just calls everyone by thier last names to seem fancy and shit expect for Neil's. He just calls neil, kid or just neil because he doesn't know to how to read Neil's last name nor say it so...he just calls neil, neil)
Bases around one headcannon I saw. I forgor what acc and where it came from (I'll go ahead and credit them if I find it it) but since neil had like parents who always fought or is strict as hell he perfected the ways of walking around the house quiet af and accidentally scars ppl bc of this
#nordegrim#stephen stills#headcannons#young neil#ooc#scott pilgrim the anime#scott pilgrim vs the world#scott pilgrim takes off#scott pilgrim#scott pilgrim young neil#scott pilgrim headcanons#cringe ah#im writing this at 10pm i should go to sleep now :/#...bojack horsemens neil mcbeal the navy seal :)))#i cant just say NEILS NAME WITHOUT THINKUNG OF THE NEIL FROM BOJACKNWJZJWKDKKW
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