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kneelingshadowsalome · 8 months

Note

Do you think König would watch corn/look at or think about other women if together? Maybe if he was deployed for a long time? 😪

I just meant to answer this ask with a few sentences on how König gives up porn after meeting you but... things got out of hand (again)

CW: Um. Toxic König being shameless with pictures of you. Reader leaves a paused porn stream lying around to teach König a lesson (and suffers the consequences.) Dirty talk & fluffy smut.

Our toxic King has watched porn, yes. He actually had a crippling porn addiction during his late teenage years. He was a bit of a loner due to bullying, found the internet, and the rest is history (this giant’s hormones were through the roof.)

And you know how it is when there’s a lot of spare time in the army... Even now when he’s older and working for KorTac, there are moments of dullness and boredom at the base, moments when nothing else helps to relieve the tension and anxiety.

But... after he met you, König started to get this odd feeling everytime he opened the stream. He feels a bit dirty, almost like he’s…. cheating on you. He can’t quite bring himself to watch it, let alone enjoy it, and so he closes the tab and has a frustrated fap with no other stimulation but his thoughts.

He thinks about the last time you two met and especially the blowjob you gave him. It's actually even better, remembering how you kneeled in front of him, watching up with compliance and slight terror in your big, wet, shy eyes. You always have that look when you take him in... It's enough to make his cock wet even know.

He especially replays the moment when he came in your mouth and how demurely you swallowed every last drop, how bashful and happy you looked when he praised you about it right after. Of course he wants to make sure you do such things to him again, even if it is a bit cruel of him to have his lady on her knees. It sends a distant sting to his heart to remember how you took both the king-sized cock and the generous load in your warm little mouth... And it also sends him to another thigh-ripping, heart-pounding orgasm just to recall your helpless little whimpers and eager tries to please him.

At some point, he starts to use pictures of you as fapping material, whether it be pics you’ve sent him, pics he’s taken of you, pics on your social media… And you would think it’s your bikini pics this guy is after, but no. Mostly, it’s the decent pictures, the ones where you're smiling and looking at the camera with innocent, bright eyes, the ones where you're clearly having fun with a friend or smiling on the brink of happy tears while petting a kitten. Your old thirst trap selfies from a birthday party are his favourite porn from now on. He's been a fool, not realizing you had tons of pictures online... He could've treated himself to them before he even picked you flowers.

You of course have no idea that he’s doing dirty things like that. Neither do you know König has stopped watching porn because pictures of you being cute get him off just as well or even better than pornography.

But things get interesting when you find some old files on his computer. And who cares if you’re snooping around a little bit: König is always snooping around your stuff, the little – big – gremlin. To your shock, you find hours and hours of material, neatly organized into folders labeled in German. They’re from a time before streaming services were a thing, but still, you’re feeling so very hurt.

Annoyed, you want to give him a lesson and deliberately leave a tab open on your own laptop one day, knowing he will come home soon. It’s just to make him realize how it makes you feel that he watches porn (well, he hasn’t watched those videos since he was a young pup, but you don’t know that).

When König comes home, you act like you’re busy in the kitchen. The paused video of a cute girl getting some attention from two muscular men is waiting for him, still on the screen of your laptop left purposely sitting on the table, as if forgotten.

König is quite loud when he comes in, almost barges in, takes off his shoes as quickly as he can, gives you a pitched yell that he’s home… Your heart is hammering in your chest, the heavy footsteps announce that König is eager to see you, but they end in an abrupt silence when he's stopped by the sight of what’s on your screen.

One, two, three…

You count the seconds in your head before König storms in the kitchen.

To your anxious thrill, the uproar is even worse than you thought. He marches to you, visibly shocked, demanding to know what it is on your screen.

You’ve been watching two naked men while he's been away?

Why...? Why would you even want to watch something like that?? The material is nasty, this sweet girl looks like she's being bullied by two rather big men! He didn’t even know you watched… watched porn.

The argument is quite brief in the end. You throw the accusations right back at him, and he just blinks. It turns out König hasn’t watched porn since he met you (other than those few times during which he got oddly uncomfortable), and he hasn’t watched those old videos in over ten years.

He never answers your questions on why does he want to watch all those "sweet girls" being bullied by "dirty men". He simply marches to his computer and deletes everything while you watch and bite your lip in silence.

Then he goes to your laptop and sets all kinds of sites on block. Huffing and puffing as he does that, you can see how frustrated he is that you’ve watched other men and their cocks.

The rest of the evening König looks at you like he doesn’t even know you anymore, both intrigued and suspicious. You know you’ve insulted his tender masculine sensibilities. But come evening, he teases you about it in bed, asking if one big man is not enough for you. That he didn’t even know his girl was so naughty and needy.

Don't you know that his cock alone could break you? A sweet girl like you could never handle two men... let alone two big cocks.

König has never talked so dirty, and you’re left hot and sweaty and embarrassed, thinking how stupid it is that porn is ruining your already red flagged relationship while also giving you the hottest sex yet. How stupid it is, considering neither of you have even watched those videos in reality.

And it’s not enough for König to ban websites and ensure his "naughty girl" doesn't come across any disturbing material.

You now have to repay him by sending some cute pictures of you wearing nothing but your underwear. Actually, he would prefer it that you wore nothing but your smile.

You will send the pictures to him at certain times of the day when he’s away, no exceptions. He will give you further insturctions on the dates. And you better be smiling on those pictures – one of those smiles you have when you see a cute stray cat or when it's your birthday.

Oh, and by the way: you really should change your social media accounts to private. Any pervert could be going through your photos at any given time.

#answered #yandere könig #könig smut #fluffy nasty könig drabbles #silliness level 100/10 #male yandere

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tennant-davids · 2 years

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Using Neural Filters to colour correct

i’ve had a couple of people ask about how i’ve coloured the pocket dimension scenes so i thought i’d just do a run-through tutorial kind of thing to show it, rather than going through it with everyone separately.

so this is a tutorial for how i made this:

from this:

follow along under the cut:

so just some things to point out before we move on which are essential and could get in the way of this working for you:

you will need adobe photoshop cc - v.22 or above. any versions older than this won’t work. you can find what version you currently have by opening photoshop, clicking ‘help’ on the top toolbar, and selecting ‘about photoshop’. my current version is 23.2.2.

you should know how to make a gif from frames, use timeline and work with the gif as a smart object. if you don’t know what i mean, i’ve tried to explain it briefly below.

using neural filters is resource heavy so expect photoshop to be slow in processing/exporting/saving anything you use them on. it might be worth having other programs closed while you use it if your computer has a lower or mid-range spec.

and so...

1. make your gif to do this, import your frames, crop, set frame speed etc however you normally would. if you usually make gifs with the animation bar set to ‘frame animation’, you will need to change this so that you can create a smart object. you will need to press the button with the video timeline symbol on your animation bar:

then you should select all your layers (not frames as you shouldn’t see them anymore) and right-click > convert to smart object:

you should leave your animation in timeline mode, but the purpose of the smart object is so you can add smart filters. this is especially good for things like sharpening, any effects you want to add, and of course... neural filters.

2. brighten the image and convert to black and white contrary to what we’re trying to achieve here, you should change the image to black and white and brighten it up so that you have as smooth and plain a base for the filters to apply to.

i do this by adding a black and white adjustment layer, and clicking ‘auto’ on the properties tab:

you should then add a ‘levels’ adjustment layer and drag the right tab along until it meets the beginning of the histogram. you should also move the left tab along a little bit for some contrast - how far depends on how you want your gif to look:

following this, select the smart object and two adjustment layers > right-click > convert to smart object. you don’t have to do this but i find it helps and it reduces the number of layers you have to work with.

my gif now looks like this:

3. adding the neural filter now your image is about to change in a huge way. click on filter on the top toolbar and select ‘neural filters’:

from here, you will see this screen and a bunch of current filters and beta filters on the right-hand side. you may have to download them to get them to work. for this, we’re using ‘colorize’ so at least make sure you have that one downloaded and ready to use:

when you turn the ‘colorize’ filter on, after processing (this can take a few seconds), your image now looks like this:

(note: this gif is an exception in how well it turned out first time - the filter has applied evenly minus a couple of issues i’ll go over below. how successful it will be depends on how much movement is in the clip, or how many colours it will need to find, and it sometimes gets confused with dark and light tones. you’ll find most of the time that the gifs will have patches that aren’t coloured, or will have incorrect colour correction that you’ll need to go in frame-by-frame and patch in by hand. the filter does do a lot of heavy lifting though.)

you can then play around with the saturation (i usually reduce it to -10) and the colours similarly to how you would in ‘colour balance’, however it has a more all-over even tone:

the last thing you need to do is select ‘smart filter’ on this drop-down menu:

if you don’t change it to smart filter, the filter will only apply to the frame you can currently see and won’t apply to the whole animation.

my gif now looks like this:

this might be enough for you in which case great news! you get to stop here, apply whatever sharpening and colouring you want, and save as normal!

however, i’m a perfectionist to a fault so i need to do a few more things first...

(note: it’s always worth doing the next step even if you’re happy with the finished product here, just in case you missed a spot)

4. check the filter has applied throughout the whole gif you’ll see that you now have a much more even base to work from and colour your gif as normal, however neural filters aren’t perfect and do leave funny little glitches throughout your gif sometimes. in order to check this, i usually scrub through to see if there are any issues. in this gif, i spotted two.

in these two areas - on the moving gif - i can see the colouring flickering. the filter hasn’t applied the right colour on every frame, or simply hasn’t coloured it at all:

this gif isn’t the worst offender for this, but if you look closely you’ll see it. so...

5. make a new layer and fill in the flickering areas press the ‘new layer’ button:

and now use the ink dropper tool to pick up the colour you want to use, and paint over the area where the colour is flickering - e.g. i used the dropper to pick up the colour from the desert in the background and painted over that area. i also picked up some of the colour from the sky and coloured over the flickering by the storm. i used these brush settings:

when you’ve painted on the colour you want, and as much as you want, set the layer to ‘color’. i also change the opacity to 80% to let some of what’s underneath still come through a little bit, but do what’s best for you and your gif:

my gif now looks like this, with less noticeable flickering:

7. brighten, colour and sharpen however you normally do idk if you have an existing psd or just experiment with adjustment layers, but your gif is now ready to start colouring however you normally would. the neural filter is basically acting as a reset to give you a blank canvas in which to gif as normal. for this gif i started with a ‘hue and saturation’ adjustment layer to change the green background to a more dirt/sand colour as it’s meant to be the desert, and then just played around with my usual combination of adjustments until i came up with the final product! i then sharpen using filter > sharpen > smart sharpen and it should be done.

8. export (save for web) you all know how to do this by now, but be aware that these will load slowly. gifs aren’t the fastest things to save on a good day but with the neural filter applied, they’re particularly slow. this is why i said to do work on the gifs one at a time - don’t have photoshop doing more than it needs to do or it might slow down to a halt.

so after all that, this is the final version of my gif:

tips and tricks

avoid making gifs of moments with a lot of movement - this could be the subject of the gif moving, the background, the wind blowing something around etc. while normal colouring can tolerate these changes, the filter isn’t yet clever enough to work it out and it makes the gifs unsalvageable because you can’t paint over the flickering accurately enough - e.g.:

(p.s. if anyone knows how to get the filter to work on this specific scene you have to tell me lmao it’s been driving me mad...)

try and keep the gifs short - i haven’t made one above 55 frames, i think. that is still quite a lot but it is a challenge to ensure the filter can cope with it. shorter gifs would probably mean a cleaner result.

you have to set the gif to black and white first - the colorize filter is designed to bring black and white photos/videos to life. i tried it over the blue filter directly and it was successful but i had more consistent luck when starting in black and white.

make sure you brighten the gif significantly before applying the filter - it really helps to give a cleaner canvas for the filter to apply to, but it’s not essential if you really don’t want to.

if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ASK. i’m by no means an expert and this is just what i’ve observed from using this feature and the workarounds i’ve found working for me so far, but happy to try and help where i can and happy to take suggestions too! <3

#malex #roswell new mexico #gif tutorial #photoshop tutorial #ps help #allresources #completeresources #itsphotoshop #*laurengifs #*tutorial #this is so long #but i hope it's helpful #i think needing the newer versions of ps is probably what's going to get in the way most but just in case it doesn't... ta-daaa #1k

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muav99 · 8 months

Text

Shower sex drabble-

Unedited~

Boyfriend hyunjin x reader, PinV, rough shower sex, choking kink, degrading kink

You wait in bed late at night waiting for Hyunjin to make it back from practice.

Its been a long day for both of you

You sit slumped over staring at your bright computer screen, you notice its 12:45am. well….he’s later then usual.

You close out your college homework tab exhausted. Deciding to destress you click on Youtube

First recommended to you is Hyunjin’s play with fire video.

Well that’s just convenient isn’t it…

You click on the video eager to watch, this one never gets old.

The way he moves, the way he rocks and sways

You feel your cheeks burning and butterflies in your stomach. He really knows how to affect you. And he’s not even there.

The video has you in a trance, your eyes glued to the screen, your thighs pressed together now a little too eager for him to return home.

You reach slowly under your pillow for your vibrator and…..

“Hello my love” his signature smile greeting you at the door

He opens it fully and places his bags down, clearly exhausted

You slowly retreat your hand and close your laptop in a hurry

He collapses into the bed next to you

Now look up at you he sighs in relief

“Long day?” You ask

“Long day” he replies

“Im sorry baby” you stroke his arms and trace circles on his exposed skin

He closes his eyes content

“What were you watching?” He asks still eyes closed

You gulp a little nervous now. But you shouldn’t be. Right?

“Just you my love” you answer sweetly

“Oh i see, so you missed me?”

“More then you know” you reply, and he cocks his eyebrow and makes that silly face you love

“What?” You laugh

“Nothin” he says quietly

“Im going to take a shower, care to join?”

“Sure baby” cause why would you ever decline?

“You wanna make sure he relaxes tho. Don’t get any ideas y/n.” You mumble to yourself

“What?” He turns his head sitting up now

“Nothin”

He giggles and grabs your hand

“Come on”

The shower feels so nice on your skin, warm, inviting. Its just what you needed.

Starting to relax you breathe in and out taking in the moment

Hyunjin’s wetting his hair

What a sight to see. Gosh he’s so sexy. But nows not the time for that

He moves closer to you and grips your hips, his hands roaming your body

Maybe it is then…

“Hyun” you start

He shushes you and puts his finger on your lips and drags your lip down teasingly

Oh…..

Your cheeks get red and you begin to squirm a bit, flustered

“Its okay honey relax” he whispers into your ear

He grips your breasts massaging them in circles

You moan out lightly

“I wanna hear you” he says

He pulls your body against him completely and you feel his hard on

He grinds against you slowly, kissing down your neck making bites and sucking, leaving marks

“Please, can i just put it in baby” he whines against your skin grinding harder

“You wont have to do anything i’ll make you feel good”

You whimper and he reaches his hand down teasingly and starts to touch you

You sigh

“Yes hyunjin”

“That easy?” He chuckles

He lines himself up with you and slowly glides in

You both grip each other in pleasure

He unexpectedly pushes you against the wall

“Hyun wha….oh my god” You moan

He thrusts hard into you, your body pressed against the shower wall

Slapping noises, hot water and steam fill the room

He grips your hips for control and grinds into you speeding up

You’re both moaning and screaming

“You’re doing so gooood” he says into your ear

“Hyu…..hyun……hyunjinnn” you moan being rocked into the wall faster

He grips your neck and starts to lightly choke you

You’re seeing stars

His other hand reaches for your clit and begins rubbing circles into you

The pace speeds up if possible, he’s so rough

It almost hurts being shoved back and forth into the wall but you dont care

“Ohohhhhhh baby” he moans

You both are moving your hips desperately awaiting your high

“You little slut grinding into me”

“You like when I fuck you like this”

“You little whore watching me…..my whore”

The profanities that come out his mouth baffle you. But you wont lie it turns you on more

Screaming, you grab his hand touching your clit and desperately quicken the pace

You both grip each other tight reaching your high

“Cum for me” he whispers into your neck biting down on you lightly

“Oh hyun…..jin”

“More, more” he whines

The sex is feral at this point

“Cum for me”

“Yes”

You both cum and he takes his hand off your neck turning you around

He kisses your nose, your cheek, your forehead and brings you in close resting his forehead on yours

“I love you”

“I love you too” you reply

So sorry this took so long but I hope you enjoyed! 🫶

#smut #skz scenarios #skz fanfic #felix smut #skz smut #straykids smut #felix x reader #hyunjin #hyunjin smut #skz felix #hyunjin x reader

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dollsonmain · 6 months

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Today I should rest and spend time with myself but there's too much to do.

I need to look for insurance some more, shower, catch up on chores, get ready to go get groceries/make the list....

Yesterday I remembered something.

So, I get up really early in the morning in the hopes of getting a little time to myself with the quiet.

On weekdays That Guy gets up at 4 and so do I. I make sure I'm up and out of bed, downstairs, drinking my coffee before he gets out of the shower so he doesn't come kneel down and try to stick his dick in my face every morning.

He leaves at 5.

Then, if I'm lucky, Son will stay in bed until 6 but he usually gets up at 5 because That Guy stomps and slams and insists on having a conversation or giving me a lecture first thing in the morning when I'm not even awake, yet.

This morning it was "Our son doesn't know some specific information which is not available to him and he's disrespecting me by not having this information that doesn't exist can you figure it out but don't tell him you're figuring it out behind his back because I want him to do it even though he can't." Again.

Son leaves at 7.

On the weekends I often wake up around 5 or 5:30 and try to sneak out of bed

Usually, Son is already awake and he gets up as soon as he hears me moving around in the house. He starts immediately with noise videos, noisy apps, transcribing music, etc. and he talks the whole time. Louder, and louder, and louder with the occasional "Dad's asleep, still, watch your volume [because I'd like him to stay that way]" from me.

Often That Guy is woken up by me getting out of bed and also gets up because he's suddenly Alone and that's unacceptable.

Yesterday, I was up and trying to work on something on the computer, Son got up and started in but I've gotten pretty good at both engaging with him and continuing to work, then That Guy got up and demanded my full attention constantly.

I snapped at him a bit saying I was busy and leave me alone, which I feel bad about, but if I'm sitting in front of a screen, typing, with multiple resource tabs open, actively researching and processing information, I don't need a play-by-play of every fart, the fact the house is cold like every winter, and what he's eating/drinking, and are you still working are you still working are you still working I want to play video games and you have to watch.

...

It reminded me of a time at my grandma's house when my aunt and I were still young. My aunt is 5 years younger than I am, so we are close in age.

Grandma put us to bed in her bed, which was a queen, and my aunt kept scooting over so she was basically on top of me. I told her to move and give me space, but she wouldn't.

I got up and went to the other side of the bed repeatedly in the night and every time she'd scoot over on top of me again.

Eventually I took a blanket into the living room to sleep on the couch, and she followed me there, too.

In the morning I complained to grandma and she said I was being mean and my aunt just wanted to cuddle and be close to me.

What I needed didn't matter.

That persists. It doesn't matter that I need time to myself. I'm expected [by That Guy] to pay attention to Son at all times and to pay attention to That Guy at all times.

The only time I get truly to myself is very early in the morning if I'm lucky enough the boys stay in bed, or for about an hour at night because I go to bed earlier than everyone else on purpose.

This is why I call Monday my recovery day, but I don't get Monday, either. Monday is groceries day.

Even if I try going down to the basement, That Guy starts stomping around overhead as hard as he can, just to remind me he's up here, he's Alone, I'm not doing what he wants me to do, and he's bored.

It doesn't matter how much I beg the people around to please, please just get off of me.

It's very frustrating.

Anyway, that's all part of why I'm so hard focused on the basement right now, I guess.

Desperately trying to regain control of literally anything, trying to find a quiet place where I can breathe, trying to feel human again.

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cakeinthevoid · 7 months

Text

You Called

Whumptober No. 6: “Do or die, you’ll never make me; Because the world will never take my heart.”

Recording | Made to Watch | “It should have been me.” (1, kind of 2)

Content: Transformation whump, forced transformation, removed(??) whump, werewolf whumpee

as soon as I thought I could write short pieces my brain went nope! and also my brain went nope! for all of whumptober so i'm defo not completing it this year. it was fun while it lasted :))

“Kuza, you’re gonna want to see this.”

Detective Kuza sighed. He really didn’t.

“Bring it over, then,” he muttered.

“Stop being lazy and come over here,” Smriti snapped. She had worked alongside the detective long enough to stop tolerating his dramatic apathy.

Kuza kicked his feet out, pushing his chair back with enough force for it to roll across the room and stop about a meter from Smriti’s desk.

“You called?” He drawled.

His partner ignored him, simply pressing a key to play a video on her monitor.

The frame nearly took up the whole screen, leaving room on the right for what looked like a computer terminal on a separate window.

Kuza turned to Smriti. “Is this the—“

“Shh,” She shushed him, despite the lack of audio.

He turned back in time to see a figure drag in a box nearly his size into the room. Otherwise the room looked bare. Concrete. Grey.

The figure left hurriedly as soon as they got the box in the centre of the room.

Now that the camera could focus on the box, Kuza could make out a serial number on its edge: LW1X—9K23.

Shit. Smriti was right.

There was a few frames of the box in the room where he wasn’t sure if it was still playing. Everything was still.

And then the box burst open from the inside. A blur of motion, and the huge wooden crate was in pieces on the floor.

The creature bounced around the room, wall to wall before slowing down and pacing in a circle on all fours.

Even in his wolf form, Kuza recognized him.

Avery Muton. One of his closest friends who was currently living in Kuza’s sister’s guest room. Still recovering, weeks later.

He didn’t react. He just watched the tape play. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Smriti trying to glean something from his face.

Back on the screen, Avery was howling. Then something got his attention; he started sniffing the air. With his head turned upward, Kuza saw a thick metal collar gleaming on his throat.

Kuza’s eyes went to the other tab on the screen; white code and numbers started to appear, scrolling down. That was Smriti’s area of expertise.

He could still read though, so when ACTIVATED came up in all caps, he looked back to the main screen in dreadful anticipation.

Avery crumpled and twisted in pain, fangs bared. Kuza found himself grateful there was no audio. The camera became fuzzy for a few moments as his distress increased, and then Kuza came to a dreadful realization, watching Avery paw at his head and snout.

They were trying to force a transformation.

“Do you know what date this was recorded?”

Smriti scrolled up in the terminal. “If I understood the cipher correctly, this was October 6th of this year. Or that could just be the date it was uploaded to the folder,” she admitted.

Kuza moved to stop the playback, but Smriti stopped him.

“There’s more—“

“Were they successful?”

“What?”

“Did they change it into a human?”

“Technically no, but—“

“Then I don’t need to see it,” he snapped coldly.

Smriti continued. “Technically no,” she emphasized, “but look,” she gestured to the screen.

Avery had stopped writhing around. He lay on the floor, panting heavily, ears twitching.

He flinched at something. Then he struggled to his feet, swaying and trembling. He took a step forward and fell against the wall. He put a paw against the wall, as if he was going to pull himself up.

Then he started to try and do exactly that; Avery tried to stand on his hind legs and failed miserably, face planting on the concrete. He looked painfully disoriented, jaw opening and closing, his body shuddering—

“What am I supposed to be seeing?” He asked coldly.

“You can’t see the difference?”

Kuza side-eyed her, unimpressed.

“He’s in there,” she said simply. “Partial success,” she read from the bottom of the terminal.

Good lord that actually explains so much, Kuza thought to himself amid the horror. He needed to let his sister know—if she didn’t already. Avery actually spoke with her.

“Save it to the case file,” he said tonelessly. He rolled back to his desk.

He had work to do.

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bf-skz · 1 year

Text

24 to 25 days of SKZMAS | December 5th - Jisung

pairing: Han Jisung x Reader

genre: mutual pining

synopsis: Jisung and his crush work desk by desk at the marketing department of JY Publishing. Jisung is completely unaware of the mutual attraction but seems like only these two are oblivious to the sparks between them. They migth need a Christmas miracle to realize their romance is not hopeless after all.

warnings: light cursing, slow burn

words: 800

5th day of SKZMAS

December 5th

Jisung thinks he is pretty lucky.

He has a cool flat, fun friends and a job he actually likes quite a lot. He was always interested in marketing; luring people in and sweet-talking them to the point where they feel exceptional and ready to spend their money comes to him so easily. It’s fun to come up with new ideas to keep the customers on your toes, and the holiday season is the perfect time for that. With the seasonal plan ready, though, he is left to sit in the office and pretend he is working hard.

“You are not as sneaky as you think you are.”

Jisung jumps a little as Minho walks up behind him, the older one chuckling to himself. Jisung knows it’s pointless but he quickly closes the webshop tabs on his browser.

“You didn’t see a thing!” Jisung tells him and lifts his hands as a sign of being innocent. “I know nothing about funky rainbow Christmas trees!”

“Sure you don’t.” Minho says, rolling his eyes but he cannot bite his smile back. “Just came to tell you I can’t have lunch with you today. I have this extra report to hand in by 3pm.”

“What?” Jisung whines, throwing his head back. “Why? Can’t you just pass it on to Changbin?”

“I need it for my evaluation.” Minho sighs. “And Changbin has his hands full, too. As we all do.” he says, and oh, Jisung doesn’t like that tone.

“M-me too! I have a lot to plan out and uh, stuff.”

“That’s fine, Sungie. You don’t have to lie to me.” Minho tells him, patting his shoulder, as if he was saying once again, I am the bigger man. Damnit.

Soon, Minho leaves and Jisung is all alone, without any of his webshop tabs or the satisfaction that sneaking around gives him. All alone, except for…

“Hey!” you poke his arm. “Look at this turkey shaped hat. It makes a sound and dances!” you say, playing the video on your computer. “Christmas wishlist material for sure.”

“Oh my gosh, that's so fucking cool.” Jisung says with a grin, and his eyes may linger on your excited face for a second longer than necessary. “Send me the link. I'm so buying that for you for the Christmas party.”

“Only if you wear the matching Santa hat.” you giggle, sending Jisung the email with a little heart in the subject. Subtle hints could go far, you read it in one of Hyunjin’s articles. Though the boy is not known for his subtlety. “Have you seen that they are looking for volunteers to organize and decorate?”

“Oh, yeah? That's fun. I hope they get enough booze to go around all night, that's the only part of that party that's worth it.” Jisung says, nodding along wisely. “I'll talk to Felix. He's obsessed, I'm sure he's gonna be on the committee again.”

“Oh yeah!” you say with an excited hum. “We could also volunteer!” your eyes light up suddenly. “We could just fuck around in the office without doing any work!”

Jisung thinks about it for a second before slowly turning to you. “That… is a bloody genius idea!” he grins widely, bouncing in his chair. “Fuck, you are so smart! I could kiss you-” he starts but after a second of shocked silence, he bursts out in high-pitched giggles. “I mean, haha, you rock!”

Your eyes widen and you blush to a deep red color. God… could you imagine kissing the Han Jisung? Cause you sure can, uh-oh. “Y-yeah! Hahaha you are even more awesome babe- I mean, bro.”

“T-thanks! You're, uhm, you're just so great…” Jisung says, watching you in awe and wow, you have beautiful lips…

“Hey, guys!”

Jisung almost falls off his chair as Felix greets you cheerfully.

“Holy- bro, where did you even come from?”

“I was eavesdropping right around the corner.” he deadpans before giggling like a little kid at, well, Christmas. “You both are going to love being on the organizing committee!”

“Wow, you really were listening in on us!” you cheer with a tight smile. “How much did you hear?”

“Just this.” Felix says without missing a beat, and he smiles at you angelically. “I'll add your names to the list then. Toodles!”

Jisung only dares to breathe again once Felix is gone. The little guy can be terrifying sometimes…

“Guess we are the elves this year.” he says, taking a glance at you sheepishly.

“Better order a hat then.” you smile at him sweetly. “Like this one. It even includes the ears!” you say with an excited gasp as you turn back to your computer screen.

“Yeah. Let's get matching ones.” he says softly, not taking his eyes off you. Maybe this Christmas he will be… braver than last year.

to be continued...

#han jisung #jisung #stray kids #skz #jisung au #han au #stray kids au #skz au #jisung fic #skz fic #24 to 25 days of skzmas #skzmas #mymercury #yourandromeda #bf-skz #jisung x reader

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ghostpuffers · 2 years

Text

PORN☆ pt.2

Summary: Steve loves a porn star who happens to move in next door and show him how she makes her money

Warnings:smut,swearing

Authors note: even this is set in the 1990s let's pretend they have computers and phones cause it's part of the story

Steve looked out his window to see a moving truck next door. He suddenly remember his old neighbors had moved out a few weeks ago and put the house up for sale.he walked downstairs to greet his new neighbor. He walked outside side and to the house next door and knocked on it. He expected an old couple or a family of three but his jaw almost dropped when you open the door in a revealing crop top paired with booty shorts and knee high socks. He recognized you bit he couldn't think why."Hello?" You questioned th e man standing in front of you."oh uhh hi sorry I'm your neighbor i-i just wanted to say hey!" Steve stuttered snapping out of his thoughts." Ok... well hi I guess my name's y/n" you said sticking out your hand in front of you. Steve hesitated before gripping your hand and shaking it aggressively. " umm I gotta go I have homework to do bye!" He says quickly walking away back to his house running inside, upstairs, and into his room slamming his door shut

Grabbing his laptop to start his home work the recent tab was open again and thats when it hit him. He recognized his neighbor to be his favorite pornstar. His face heated up as he tryed to come to his senses ultimately deciding to take a shower. He walked back downstairs not bothering to close his laptop leaving the tab open. He walked into the bathroom taking off his shirt and tossing it asdid when all of a sudden he hears a knock at the front door.

He opened the door to see you standing awkwardly on his porch as you scanned his chest. " umm sorry to b-bother you I can come b-back if this is a bad time." You stuttered. He looked confused until he realized he was still shirtless and his abs on full display to you."oh n-no of course not please come in." He blushed pulling you inside and shutting the door behind you."whatcha need?" He asks leaning on his kitchen counter. "Umm I just wanted to hang out cause I'm new here and I dont have many friends" you say looking at the floor. "Of course I gotta take a shower so you can chill in my room for a sec"He offers. "Sure where's your room?" You and happy to stay." it's upstairs, first door on the left."He looks up and you two make eye contact for a moment. You break the tension."great I'll be waiting." You turn and walk upstairs. He let's out a breath he didn't know he was holding and walks back into the bathroom turning on the water.

You walked into his room freezing as you notice a familiar site open on the screen of Steve computer. It was you, your video you made this morning was something he was watching. You looked a little more to find he was your top subscriber and had watched all of your videos. You had a quickly developed a crush on him but this made a wetness pool in your underwear. You closed the laptop setting it on his desk. You hear the shower turn off and the bathroom door open. Steve walked upstairs and into his room to see you on The bed relaxed."hey sorry I took a while." He said grabbing the matching shirt to the bottoms he was wearing. You took the moment jumping up and taking the shirt from his hands." Don't bother" you let out right before crashing your lips into his. Steve was shocked for a moment before kissing back and grabbing the back of your neck deepening the kiss.

"You wanna see how I make my money?"you whispered making him blush as he realized you saw the tab.biy he didn't care taking the chance."fuck yes" he practically moaned at the thought.he tore of your shirt almost ripping it and pulled down your and underwear shorts as you unzipped his pants. He pushed you onto his bed reconnecting the kiss his tounge searching your mouth. He trailed it down kissing your neck to your stomach all the way down kissing your inner thigh starring up at you before diving into your pussy."mmmh" you did your natural porn star moan.sucking and licking until you felt the pressure in your stomach to be too much.steve was running and grinding frantically against the mattress to get any friction.you were about to cum when you felt a loss of pleasure realizing Steve had taken his hands and face away."I wanna cum with you" he admits taking his pants and boxers to reveal He dick wet with precum. He entered you letting out a long quiet moan.

Quickening his pace hitting your g spot with every thrust. slamming into you. "Fuck you feel better than I ever imagined" he moaned his head tilting back." Omg I'm gonna c-cum Steve please fuck me harder!" You begged as Steve began to speed out pulling away till only the tip was in you and slamming back into you." Same baby girl cum with me" He replied quickening his pace." One, two, three!" You both letting out a string of cuss words as you feel him filling you up as you coat his dick with your liquids.

Ridding out your highs and eventually coming to a stop. He pulled out falling onto the bed next to you. You kiss him and he wraps an arm around your waist.

"That's so much better than your videos" he laughed. "I'm glad you enjoyed it whenever you need some help just knock on my door." You get up but Steve pulls you back down. "Why don't you stay the night your already here." Fine I guess I can stay" you fall back onto the bed and snuggle up next to Steve. "Goodnight." He says falling asleep."goodnight".

#steve harrrington smut #steve harrington #stranger things smut #smut

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cyberneticlagomorph · 2 years

Text

The cuffs are off now, but the strips of spell-tape around your wrists remain so you couldn't cast a spell or shapeshift even if you wanted.

The adhesive is giving you a rash.

"OK but," your voice is strangled, nasal as you shove wads of fast food place napkins up your nostrils to staunch the bleeding. "What does this have to do with me?"

Everything smells like fries.

The new girl-Agent, Beth, points at the computer screen again.

A single tab is opened to a conspiracy theorist forum called "redstring.board".

A thread about a game called "Ursumbra" and questions about publicity stunts, linked to videos showcasing more creatures like the one you were mistaken for.

Not all of them are rabbits.

"We're giving you a chance to prove your innocence." Says Beth.

"No, you're forcing me to do your dirty work." You reply, leaning forward to keep the blood in your nose from sliding down the back of your throat.

You're gonna throw up a huge clot later, you can FEEL it.

"Same difference." Grumbles the previous Agent, who's being about as useful as the P in pterodactyl.

His name is unimportant, or would be if he'd actually given it to you… so you're just gonna call him Beef (in your head) for now.

"I don't see why I should care, you guys seemed perfectly happy to kick my shit in and pin everything on me five minutes ago." You gesture to your ruined face.

Beef scowls but doesn't speak, Beth offers you a smile that is probably meant to be sympathetic or apologetic or some other -etic you don't know about but just comes off as patronizing.

"Well, you did maim an officer." She says, as if biting off a finger is anywhere near the same ballpark as what you just went through.

The officer in question had it coming, but that's a different story entirely.

Beth leans forward, hands on the table, until you're both eye to eye.

"Even if this specific charge doesn't stick, your file is practically a phone book… I'm sure we could find something to pin on you, no matter how small." Her head tilts, pastel green hair tumbling to one side, "It would be in your best interest to cooperate with us."

Your eyes narrow and you open your mouth to say something intensely vulgar but your jaw goes slack and your body numb.

Beth smiles again, all perfect white teeth and eyes the color of mint chip ice cream.

Complete with little brown flecks.

She's so pretty

And so close.

Too close.

You feel cornered.

Somehow Even More than you did when you were fully restrained.

Something behind this woman's eyes makes you feel sick and scared, and oh so very Very small.

Mesmer.

She's a fucking MESMER.

You can feel the fingers of her magic pluck at your heartstrings and apprehension, quite literally playing you like a fiddle.

Your heartbeats thunder in your ears as you seem to fall headlong into those deep green pools.

Human Mesmers are dangerous in ways that Fae and vampire Mesmers aren't.

They don't have the same kind of restrictions or restraint, they find loopholes that were never meant to be used.

"My partner and I are gonna step outside for a bit and give you time to rethink our offer, ok?" Beth's voice sounds so far away but it feels like she's unscrewed your skull and poured every bit of herself into you.

It hurts.

Your brain feels like it's trembling.

Boiling alive in its own juices.

You can feel yourself nodding and smiling against your will, your body nothing but her puppet now.

And then she blinks, and you're free.

The breath you weren't aware you were holding comes rushing back into you and you go as limp as a rag doll as the two Tower agents leave the room.

Exhaustion pulls you under.

You rest your cheek on the table, and feel the coolness of the metal seep into your aching bones.

Your breathing slows, your eyelids finally slip closed, and by the time the overhead lights start to flicker and dim you're already crying.

You just want to go home.

They leave you there for what feels like hours.

The silence soaks up your thoughts and spits them back at you.

Until there's nothing but a loop of your own fears feeding back into themselves over and over again.

Until you panic.

By the time the Agents come back, you're wild eyed and wrapped around their fingers.

It's not the threats that get you, it's the confinement.

The silence.

The solitude.

You can handle all the physical pain in the world, but the second you're alone with yourself you start to fucking unravel like a cheap sweater.

If they found something else to pin on you, then every day would be like this.

The silence, the solitude.

Just give in.

Swallow your pride and just

Give

Beth sits at the table, loudly eating an order of fries.

Your stomach doesn't growl so much as it convulses as if it's trying to eat itself.

You haven't had anything to eat or drink since they brought you in and you can't even remember when that was.

"So," Beth begins, speaking with her mouth full just to taunt you. She can see the madness in your eyes and it DELIGHTS her, "It's a deal then?"

#ic #action post #police brutality #mind control #injury #ask to tag

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fazeruined · 5 months

Text

Oh boy, I know I haven't been very active but I think I just got some sweet sweet vanni mask headcanons brewing in my mind (and by brewing I mean they just popped up and I have to write them NOW)

So, Helpi tells Cassie they were leaving the V.A.N.N.I Network zone right before going so far down from the PizzaPlex to find Gregory Mimic. That presents the fact that the V.A.N.N.I Network is limited and has end 'edges'. Thinking about it, it's unlikely the V.A.N.N.I Network zone has much if at all coverage outside/beyond the PizzaPlex.

But that doesn't mean the vanni mask is useless after Cassie escapes that place despite everything.

For one, she can keep contact with Helpi (his means to talk to her without the mask were only functional within the V.A.N.N.I Network zone.) While he was part in her downfall, it was mostly due to the Mimic's influence, and going out of the network zone seems to have pulled Helpi out of that.)

Cassie can also use it as a form of escapism, using the mask to imagine herself able to visit the still open and uncorrupted PizzaPlex and see all her robot friends whole and happy, and even her family working there. Like when she was little-- like how it should have always been.

There is no 'AR World' outside the PizzaPlex. The outside world looks normal even with the mask on.

But that's where a couple new features came to light.

Without the network zone, the vanni mask appears to work like a detector of Fazbear products and technology, able to clue Cassie of other Fazbear devices and their locations through the outside world, especially those with some sort of circuitry in their components.

Things like some of their toys, equipment... computers, games, Fazbear cams, Fazbear walky-talkies, Fazwatches, animatronics, parts, softwares, hardwares...

There's quite some things Cassie can do with that kind of information, like being able to locate places selling Fazbear products, and other Fazbear locations following a gathering of Fazbear products detected in the same location (lol unplanned brand-promoting,) in an scenario where Ruined Roxy and/or the other ruined robots are with Cassie, she can use this feature to find parts necessary to help fix them, and even finding and/or keeping tabs on people who use/carry Fazbear products.

And after Cassie gets handy enough with this new feature, she could tap and even hack into detected products-- letting her passively spy on the users of said products, access users' information stored within said products, or even remotely interact with the products themselves. Think of it like those real, creepy cases of hackers who got access to nannycams-- yikes. Fortunately Cassie would be far more interested in detecting parts to help fix her friends.

Unless you're one of a certain group of people.

In case of Fazbear animatronics, Cassie can access their optical/audio receptors (see/hear through their eyes/ears,) remotely access their features (powering them on or off, randomly activating their functions-- while invasive, at most it's just useful for trolling; imagine Glamrock Freddy's chest hatch randomly opening and closing like a kid repeatedly pushing the button for the garage door.)

It's also possible for Cassie to start a remote communication with these animatronics directly in their 'brain', and even send them files and data for them to look over (like videos.) In addition to this, she can send them 'instructions' that get added to their regular internal routines, making them compelled to follow said instructions (but they can choose not to since they're not being taken over like in an actual hack attempt, based on how developed their AI is, and if they don't like whatever instructions they're being given,) despite it not being in their usual behavior-- Cassie usually uses this to instruct service bots into leaving Fazbear parts in locations she can grab them for her broken robot friends (listen they're broken AND broke af they can't pay for that!)

And since the vanni mask itself is considered a security tool (it's also called the Security Mask, and said to be a security tool by a special class of Fazbear techs, after all,) rarely its infiltration into Fazbear products rarely go noticed or even if noticed it doesn't necessarily gets taken as a threat or attack by the system-- though that depends on what Cassie does in that instance. Animatronics (especially those with more complex AI,) will always notice the shift, but not necessarily take it as a threat either, more so as a "Huh. That's a thing." Though, again, that depends on what Cassie does with that connection.

Alternatively, she can send a distress signal that nearby animatronics can pick up from-- very useful if Cassie is in danger!

And to sever whatever connection/communication she's made, all she has to do is take her mask off-- "bye chat," pretty much.

#;shattered dreams;; hc #v; stars over a new sunrise;; fnaf sb ruin escaped end 1 #v; black stars over the horizon;; fnaf sb ruin escaped end 2 #v; its a brand new day;; fnaf sb ruin sitcom end #so much fun possibilities to explore with this teehee

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originalhybridloverfics-backup · 6 months

Text

Healing and Scars - The Huntress Returns

Summary: Helena returns for revenge against her father, Chaos is left in the wake of her actions.

Oliver entered the foundry.

John, who was looking at an article about the man who killed Andy on Felicity’s computers, quickly closed the tab and glanced over his shoulder at him. “Hey. Where you been?”

“Oh, I thought I’d give myself a rare morning in,” said Oliver.

John looked at him in amusement, doubting his words. Oliver was not one to take it easy.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Oliver defended. “The club is opening, finally. McKenna and I are going on date number six tonight, which is... It’s significant. And, uh, I don’t know. It seemed like a good day to give the bad guys a rest.”

“Well, it’s the bad girls that I’m worried about.” John turned back to the computer screen and opened a video tab.

“Helena.” Oliver said, recognizing the woman in the video.

“Yes, or as I like to call her, your psycho ex-girlfriend,” said John, playing the footage. “This was taken at Alley Cats, the strip joint. The police report lists the stiff’s name as Gus Sabatoni.”

“That’s Bertinelli’s lawyer. Why would she come back to Starling City just for him? It’s not like he did a good job,” said Oliver, turning away, trying to understand Helena’s reasoning. “Her father’s serving consecutive life sentences without parole.”

“Come on, Oliver, we both knew this was just a matter of time.” John stood, taking a step toward him. “You tried to help her, you couldn’t. Now the only question is, how long before she drops the dime on you, me, this whole operation?”

“Ok. I want you to get in touch with the contacts in the Bratva. Talk to anyone on the street, figure out where Helena is, why she’s back.” said Oliver and turned to leave.

“Ok. But Oliver–”

“Dig,” Oliver turned back around, cutting him off. “If she’s here, she’s here for a reason. If that’s not Frank Bertinelli, we need to know what she has planned.”

“Ok.” said John, watching Oliver’s retreating back.

John just knew this was going to become so much more complicated.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver entered his family home, the sound of his sister’s laughter reaching his ears. “Speedy?” he called out.

“Oh, we’re in here.” Thea’s voice called out to him.

Oliver followed the sound of her voice to the sitting room and was greeted by the sight of her sitting on one of the two couches in the room with Helena. He was instantly alert.

“Look who’s back.” Thea smiled. “She was just telling me about your guy's first date at Russo’s.”

Helena looked over her shoulder at him. “Hello, Oliver.”

“Oh, Ollie, I kind of have this pseudo friend that’s looking for a job. I was wondering if the club’s still hiring?” Thea asked.

“Yes.” Oliver answered her immediately. “Of course. Talk to Tommy. As a matter of fact, you can go upstairs and call Tommy right now,” he said urgently. He needed Thea away from Helena.

“Great.” Thea grinned, getting up from the couch. “You rock.”

Oliver kept his expression of politeness until Thea walked past him and out of the room.

Helena stood to face Oliver.

“Where you been?” Oliver asked, closing the distance between them. His tone accusing.

“Um... Barcelona. Monaco, Budapest.” Helena listed off. “I just needed to forget who I was. And how much I missed you.”

“Do you mean like you missed Gus Sabatoni?” Oliver confronted her. He refused to fall for her attempt to persuade him. “I thought you were done with your father’s organization, Helena. Because he’s serving consecutive life sentences in Iron Heights prison. You got your revenge.”

“He just cut a deal with the Justice Department to testify against the East Coast family. In 48 hours, Witness Protection will give him a new name, a new life, and he’ll be off the grid forever. Untraceable!” Helena stressed, the thought of her father getting off easy for his crimes, eating her alive.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Oliver told her, and he was, but he couldn’t help her. He couldn’t be part of her revenge crusade. It wasn’t justice, no matter how hard she tried to convince herself it was.

“My father doesn’t deserve a second chance-- a second life,” said Helena passionately. “And I can’t. I can’t take on a phalanx of U.S. marshals. Not without help.”

“No.” said Oliver, refusing. “It’s murder. It’s not justice.”

“Oh, there you are,” Moira greeted Oliver, stepping into the room. “I have a question about your opening tonight.” She paused, seeing Helena, surprise filtering across her features. “Hello.”

Helena moved to stand next to Oliver. “Hi.”

Moira put on a pleasant smile. “Oliver, who’s your friend?”

“Oh! Mom, this is Helena.” Oliver introduced, forcing a smile of politeness. “Helena, this is my mother.”

“Hi.” Helena smiled. “Nice to meet you.”

“Helena was just leaving.” Oliver told his mother, placing a hand on Helena’s back.

“Yes.” Helena agreed with a force smile. “I have a family engagement.”

“Excuse us for a minute.” Oliver told his mother and started to guide Helena out, wanting to get her away from his family.

“Of course,” said Moira as they moved past her. Women that Oliver slept with popping up out of the blue was nothing new.

Helena stopped at the edge of the room, leaning into Oliver. “I guess I will just have to be more persuasive. Fortunately... You have a family, too.” Her words brushed across his skin before she kissed his cheek and let herself out.

Oliver was left standing there tense, his mother standing a few feet behind him, waiting. Every cell in his body told him to go after Helena to make sure she wasn’t capable of following through with her threat.

Helena was pushing him, trying to get a rise out of him, and it was working.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver stood talking to John by the bar. Employees moving about, getting it ready for tonight’s opening. “She was in my house.” his voice was low so not to be overheard. “She made a not so veiled threat. I want extra security around my mother and sister.”

John had his phone out. “Way ahead of you, man.” he put it to his ear.

“Thank you,” said Oliver.

“It’s my job.” John replied, moving past him.

“For not saying, “I told you so.”” Oliver turned to lean against the bar.

“Night’s young,” said John, walking away.

Tommy appeared behind the bar, emerging from the back room with a case of alcohol.

“Where you been?” Oliver turned to him, hands on the bar. “The club opens in four hours.”

“I’ve been dealing with the vendors.” Tommy turned his back to him, unloading the crate.

“No, you haven’t. Tommy... We need to talk.” Oliver waited till Tommy turned to face him before continuing. “I’m sorry, all right. But I kept this a secret to protect the people that are closest to me.”

Oliver hated that Tommy was shutting him out, turning his back on him without even trying to understand him or why he had to do the things he did.

“Do you think that’s what I care about?” Tommy asked. “What, that my feelings are hurt? You’re a murder. A killer,” Tommy stressed, taking Oliver back. “You were my best friend in life, but now it’s like I don’t even know you.”

“You’re right,” said Oliver, recovering from Tommy’s view of him. “I’ve changed. Listen, buddy, now I can explain to you. I can explain to you how and why-- “

“What’d be the point? I wouldn’t believe a word of it, anyway.” Tommy said dismissively and walked away, leaving Oliver alone at the bar.

Oliver felt the urge to go after Tommy, but feared it was only going to make things worse.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver and Tommy’s club was packed, the dance floor crowded with people drinking and dancing.

“To Verdant.” Moira raised a glass. She was on the upper floor with Thea, Oliver, and McKenna. “I know I haven’t always been supportive of this venture, but I have to admit, this nightclub is quite an accomplishment. I’m proud of you. Your father would be, too.”

“Thank you,” Oliver appreciated her words, taking a drink from his glass.

“Yeah, congratulations, Ollie.” said Thea. “The club doesn’t totally suck.”

“Thanks, Speedy.” Oliver set his champagne glass down. “Thank you very much, all of you, for coming.”

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Tommy leaned against the bar, watching the dancing crowd with a drink in his hand, frowning. His mood sour. It was always sour these days wherever he and Oliver were in the same building, let alone the same room.

With how things were, he wasn’t sure how they were supposed to work together. He wasn’t even sure if they were friends anymore. It was a hard pill to swallow because their relationship had been more than friendship. It was a brotherhood. They were family.

“Oh! There you are.” Laurel appeared before him, excited and happy. “This place is amazing. I’m so proud of you and Ollie.”

Tommy forced a smile, sipping from his glass. “Thanks.”

“Is everything ok?” asked Laurel.

“I’m great.” Tommy lies. He didn’t want to talk about it. Especially not with Laurel, of all people. For one, she knew nothing of Ollie’s secret.

“Well, breakfast was a disaster.” Laurel informed him.

“Breakfast?” Tommy repeated, uncertain what she was talking about.

“With my parents?” Laurel clarified.

“Right. That was this morning.” Said Tommy, apologetically, realizing he had forgotten all about it.. “Uh... Sorry.”

“Are you sure everything’s ok?” asked Laurel concerned, usually Tommy was attentive, more focused on her. “Because you seem completely off.”

“I’m fine.” Tommy assured, taking her by the hands. “I promise.”

“Tommy!” Said Thea, stopping in front of them. “Tommy. Did you call Roy yet?”

“I left him a message. He starts tomorrow.” Tommy said, and Thea smiled. “Which reminds me, I have to go check in with the office. Excuse me.” he turned and headed for the stairs, needing to get away. He wasn’t in the mood to socialize with anyone.

“Hey, Tommy,” said a female voice.

Helena.

Tommy paused on the first step, giving her his attention.

“Remember me?” she asked with a smile and recognition shown in his eyes.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver headed down the stairs, spotting McKenna dancing in the crowd, smiling invitingly.

“Sorry to bother you, Mr. Queen.” a bartender approached him.

“Your timing is perfect.” Oliver assured him in relief. “I can’t dance.”

The server passed him a folded piece of paper. “They said it was urgent.”

Oliver opened the note.

Meet me downstairs. Now. - Dig.

He frowned. Certain there was a problem if Dig was asking him to meet him downstairs.

“You ok?” McKenna asked him, appearing in front of him.

Oliver looked up. “Yeah. We ran out of Cristal.”

“Oh.” said McKenna.

“I’ll be right back,” Oliver told her.

McKenna patted his shoulder. “Ok.” and returned to her dancing. Hoping he would join her soon.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

“Dig?” Oliver walked down the steps and stopped cold. Helena had Tommy bent over a table, his arm wrenched behind his back. “Let him go. He has nothing to do with this.”

“I told you. Oliver, I warned you.” Helena fisted Tommy’s hair in one hand and bent his wrist in the other at an awkward angle.

Tommy’s face was pinched uncomfortably. He was hurting, but trying not to give Helena the satisfaction of his pain.

“Helena! This isn’t you.” Oliver said, attempting to placate her. Trying to dissuade her from hurting Tommy further.

A cold fist wrapped around his heart. This is what he feared. The people he loved caught in the crossfire, being used as a weapon against him.

“My father is a mobster and a murderer. It is not like you haven’t killed men like that before!” Helena reminded him harshly.

“And I tried to teach you to obtain your objective without killing!” Oliver argued. There was another way. Why couldn’t she just accept that? She didn’t have to be this person.

“By applying leverage. By exploiting someone’s weakness.” she wrench on Tommy’s hand.

Despite his efforts, Tommy screamed out, gasping in pain.

“There is a whole club full of leverage above our heads right now. Please. Oliver, don’t make me do something that both of us will regret.” Helena gritted out.

There was a desperation in her eyes than he liked. A desperate person was more dangerous than they appeared.

“Ok! Ok. You win,” Oliver conceded. All he had to do was look in her dark eyes and he could she her words weren’t a threat but a promise. “I’ll help you. Let him go.” Anger filled his eyes at her reluctance to let Tommy go, voice rising with his own threat. “Let...Him...Go!”

Helena finally released Tommy, taking a couple of steps back, her eyes distrusting.

Tommy groaned and gasped, gripping his injured hand to his chest, doubled over in pain. It somehow hurt worse now that he was free than when she had her hands on him, manipulating his limb to a painful degree.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

“Don’t say it,” Oliver told John, pacing the Foundry floor. He didn’t need an ‘I told you so’.

“Ok. Then let’s talk about Helena.” John sat on the edge of Felicity’s station. “Oliver, if you didn’t still have feelings for this girl, you would have thought of a different solution than letting her extort you into killing someone.”

“So, what do you want me to do? You want me to kill her?” Oliver shook his head. He didn’t have a choice here.

“I think you would have a long time ago if she looked like me instead of the T-Mobile girl. She’s a stone-cold killer, Oliver.” Digg stressed.

“She’s not evil. She’s been lost since her father killed her fiancé in cold blood. And are you going to sit there and tell me that you don’t know what it’s like to want revenge? What would you do? Hmm? If Floyd Lawton was standing right there?” he pointed to the entrance.

“Nothing that will involve blackmailing you into hunting him down,” said John. There were lines he was not willing to cross. He knew that with absolute certainty.

“You’re right. Ok?” Oliver admitted. “I can’t kill her. And I can’t take her to the police and risk her exposing all of this. But at least, if I’m involved, I can contain her, all right?” Oliver reasoned. “I can minimize the collateral damage.”

“Sorry, am I... interrupting something?” Helena announced her presence, coming in through the back entrance, past the stairs.

“We were just... talking about you,” said Oliver, turning to face her.

Helena looked at Digg. “And here I thought you didn’t care much for me.”

John met her eyes head on. “Still don’t.”

“I haven’t been able to locate the safe house where the FBI is keeping your father.” Oliver said as Helena’s eyes returned to him.

“I can help with that.” Felicity walked in from the same entrance as Helena did. “I’ve been dying to hack into the FBI security system.”

“Get out.” Oliver said sharply, holding his hand out for her to stop as Digg moved to intercept, not wanting her near Helena. “Get out. This is a private thing, Felicity. Please.”

Helena’s eyes turned to her, scrutinizing her closely.

“Oh. Ok.” Felicity paused, feeling a little insulted about being kicked out. Perhaps she wasn’t a part of the team as much as she believed herself to be. She turned back the way she came. “See ya, I guess…”

“How many girlfriends do you have, exactly?” Helena asked Oliver once Felicity was gone.

“Like I said... We don’t know where the safe house is.” Oliver told her, ignoring her comment, hoping she would forget about Felicity altogether. “What we do know is that the Marshall service is taking your father to a hearing at the Justice Department tonight. There’s a problem...Helena. There are two vans. And one of them’s a decoy.”

“Well, it’s a good thing there’s two of us, then.” said Helena.

“It’s not too late to call this off.” Oliver told her. He knew she wouldn’t back down, but he had to try.

“I think you know me better than that,” said Helena. “I don’t take prisoners.”

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Felicity tried to immerse herself in her work, but she couldn’t help thinking about being kicked out of the foundry.

Admittedly, she hadn’t been working with Oliver and Digg long, but she had started to feel like she was actually part of the team and not just the IT help.

She thought they were building a friendship, but maybe she was wrong.

And who was that woman in the foundry? Felicity hadn’t liked the way the other woman looked at her. Almost like she was the dirt beneath her shoe.

She thought back to Oliver's sharp tone and the worried look on Digg’s face.

Maybe she was taking this too personal. Maybe earlier it hadn’t been about her, but whoever the model looking brunette was.

Felicity used her spoon to stir her ice cream a little. She gave her head a shake, telling herself to let it go and just enjoy her night in.

It was easier said than done.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver and Helena were parked over a dark area, waiting for their targets.

“Just your father,” said Oliver, hating that he was doing this but seeing no other way. “Anyone else gets hurt and I’ll put an arrow in you.”

Helena nodded, pressing her lips into a tight smirk. “That’s sweet. Now I know how you charmed your cop girlfriend.”

Oliver clenched his jaw.

They pulled the visors down on their helmets, hiding their identities, dressed in their leathers.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Helena and Oliver followed behind the two vans. When the vans took different routes, they split up.

Oliver followed the van into the tunnel, winding his way around traffic. He threw a star dagger, taking out the tire, followed by a second one to the back door as it skidded to a stop. The door popped open. It was empty.

Oliver turned his bike around to catch up with Helena.

However, he was too late. When he reached the other tunnel. She was cornered by the cops. Lance was making demands of who the Arrow was while McKenna was placing her in cuffs, reading her rights.

“Damn it,” Oliver cursed under his breath.

Helena met his eyes but said nothing. He turned his bike around, speeding off.

Nothing about this was good.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver broke into the police department, creating a diversion, helping Helena escape. He couldn’t risk her revealing his secret.

She had proven he could not trust her. The only thing that mattered to her was her own agenda. Vengeance above all.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

“Thanks for the save.” Helena told him, in an empty area.

“I couldn’t risk you telling the police about me,” Oliver told her.

“Is that the only reason?” Helena asked him.

Oliver said nothing.

“Why can’t you just admit... That you still have feelings for me, too?” asked Helena.

That might have been true earlier, but that was before she hurt someone he cared about. Now he just wanted her gone.

Oliver pulled an envelope from his jacket, zipping it back up. He held the white envelope out to her.

“What is it?” asked Helena, looking away from him, not liking the way he was looking at her.

“A plane ticket to Rome, and a passport so you can start a new life somewhere else,” Oliver informed her, and she looked back at him with a glare. “The police know you’re tracking your father, Helena. You’ll never find him. So get out of my city.”

Helena snatched the envelope from him, watching as Oliver turned, getting on his bike, driving off without looking back.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver knocked on McKenna’s door, blinking when she opened it dressed in a silk robe, her hair still damp from a shower.

“I’m sorry. I should have called.” Oliver apologized.

“No, it’s--it’s ok. Come on in.” McKenna stepped aside, opening the door wider.

“Are you sure?” asked Oliver, holding his jacket.

“Yeah, yeah,” she answered.

Oliver stepped inside. “Thank you.

McKenna closed the door behind her and turned to face him. “I’m surprised, but I’m happy.”

“Yeah?” asked Oliver, uncertain.

“Yeah. Everything ok?” McKenna asked.

“I had a really rough night. I just wasn’t anticipating, with my work and the club, I feel like I’m letting everybody down.” Oliver answered. “My family and Tommy and... You. I feel like I’m letting you down.”

“You’re being too hard on yourself,” said McKenna with understanding. “We both have demanding jobs.”

“That’s no excuse for hurting the people closest to you,” Oliver responds.

“No, but when you believe in what you do, you find a way to make it work.” McKenna reasoned.

“How?” Oliver asked, sounding lost.

”Well…” McKenna twisted the towel dry her hair in her hands. “The first thing you do is you find yourself someone you never have to apologize to.” She smiled up at him.

Oliver smiled, taking her hand and leaning in for a kiss. She met him halfway. It was simple and sweet. Thye pulled back, smiling at one another.

A beat passed between them before they reached for each other, their lips meeting again in a more heated kiss, arms band around one another.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver lowered McKenna to her bed, covering her with his large body, their mouths moving together as he pushed the robe down her shoulder, limbs tangling together in their passion.

The sound of their moans drowning out the buzz from Oliver’s cell in his jacket that was forgotten on the floor.

Felicity’s picture flashing on the screen.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Felicity had her back to the door as she spoke into her office phone. “Hey, it’s me. I was multitasking and intercepted a police report. A local sporting goods store just got robbed of one high-powered crossbow. Now... Could be a crazy coincidence or your psycho ex-girlfriend-- Dig’s words, not mine–”

Digg had called her and told her all about Helena and once having the full story Felicity could understand why Oliver had been short with her earlier, it made getting all but kicked out less personal.

“is still in town. I’ll let you know if I learn anything more.” She started to turn to hang the phone up. “In the meantime, just…” she paused, Helena stood in the doorway with her crossbow. “watch your back.”

“Hi.” Helena smirked. “I don’t think we had a chance to be properly introduced this morning.”

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver burst into Felicity’s office. “Felicity?”

“Oliver.” Felicity’s voice shook with a tremor.

Oliver spotted her panda flats poking out from her desk. He moved quickly and found her tied up behind her desk.

“Oliver... I’m here.” She said.

Oliver quickly pulled out a knife, cutting the fabric that kept her ankles together, doing the same with the one around her wrist behind her back. “You ok?” he helped her sit up. “Hey, hey. You ok?” his hand touched her cheek, eyes filled with concern.

Felicity nodded, the touch of his hand warm and gentle against her skin, calming her racing heart in a way she was aware his presence could.

The sound of rushing footsteps had Oliver jumping to his feet, ready to throw the knife in his hand.

Digg stood in the doorway with his gun drawn. “I got your call. What happened?”

“Helena.” Oliver answered, pulling Felicity to her feet.

“She wanted the address to the safe house where her father’s being kept. She made me hack the FBI database.” Felicity looked apologetically up at Oliver. “Sorry, Oliver.”

“Hey.” Oliver placed his hand on her shoulder. “It’s not your fault.”

Felicity knew his words were true, but it didn’t make her feel any less guilty.

Oliver moved toward the door as Digg moved further into the room.

“Oliver, what are you going to do?” John asked him.

“What I should have done in the first place.” Oliver ground out through a clenched jaw. One looked at Felicity, and his eyes filled with anger.

Helena crossed the last line she was going to cross.

Felicity looked at John after Oliver’s departure, still shaken, uncertain of Oliver’s reaction.

“Are you ok?” John asked her.

“I could use a drink to calm my nerves.” She answered honestly.

“C’mon,” John took her by the arm, leading her out.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver made his way toward the top floor of the safe house and intercepted Helena, who was taking out officers, not caring who she was hurting.

He fire at Helena. She dodged his arrow and grabbed up a fallen gun and aimed. Oliver used the wall as a shield taking cover.

Helena continued her pursuit of her father, following back outside.

Oliver followed. “Helena!”

Helena whipped around, aiming a handgun at him.

Oliver inched closer, bow drawn and pointed.

Helena walked closer. “You won’t shoot me. You’re not a murderer. Remember?”

“But you are,” Oliver growled out. “And if I let you go, that blood will be on my hands. I’m sorry.”

Oliver fired his arrow. Helena dropped the gun, catching the arrow before it could pierce her.

Oliver lowered his bow as Helena exhaled.

“I practiced that move. I had a feeling I might need it someday.” She looked at him with hurt and betrayal. “You would have killed me.”

In the next moment, they were engaging in a grappling match, trying to best one another. Ultimately, Oliver got the upper hand.

Oliver tossed her to the ground. “Enough!” he aimed his bow, knocking an arrow back.

McKenna came through the back door, gun drawn on Oliver. “Freeze!” she came down the porch steps. “Put it down. Turn around. Slowly.”

Oliver slowly lowered his weapon, placing it on the ground.

Helena cocked her gun, aiming it at McKenna.

“No!” Oliver shouted. He moved to stop her, but was too late.

McKenna hit the ground, and Helena started running.

Oliver knelt at McKenna’s side. She was bleeding and unconscious, her body bent at an awkward angle.

“McKenna?” he breathed.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver paused in the hospital hallway, his emotions getting the better of him. He took a moment to compose himself before opening her room door and knocking on the doorjamb.

McKenna, who was looking out the window from her bed, turned her head toward him. She was hooked up to an IV and a heart monitor.

“Hey.” Oliver greeted softly.

“Hey.” McKenna returned.

“How you feeling?” Oliver asked, walking to her bedside.

“Uh, numb,” she answered, trying to move but finding it very difficult.

“Hey, don’t-- don’t move.” Oliver stopped her.

“Ok.” said McKenna.

“I met your doctor.” Oliver told her, taking a seat beside the bed. “He’s a nice guy.”

“Hmm.” McKenna hummed.

“He says you’re lucky to be alive,” said Oliver.

“Yeah. He also said I have a shattered femur, and it’s going to take at least a year to rehab. I loved being a cop,” she said sadly with loss.

“Oh, come on. McKenna.” Oliver took her hand in his. “You’re still a cop. You have one more surgery, go home–”

“I’m not going home,” Said McKenna, interrupting him.

“What?” Oliver asked.

“I’m moving to Coast City to live with my sister. They have the best physical therapy facility in the country there.” She informed him.

“I’ll visit.” Oliver assured her. “Hey, I’m a billionaire, right?”

“Yeah.” McKenna smiled, but there was sadness to it.

“I’ll move to Coast City.” Oliver continued.

McKenna chuckled. “That’s very sweet, but... Your club just opened. And your work is here.”

“Don’t worry about me. It’s my responsibility to worry about you,” said Oliver.

“Just stop, ok? Listen, you know how I feel about you.” McKenna said sadly. “Please don’t make this harder than it already is.”

“Ok.” Oliver said.

A tear slid out of McKenna’s eye, and she smiled.

“Ok. It’s, uh, it’s whatever you need,” Oliver told her, pushing down his own feelings, sighing quietly to himself as he tightened his hand around McKenna’s. She appreciated his understanding.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

“Hey,”

Felicity looked up at the soft tone to see Oliver standing in front of her office doorway.

“I would have come by sooner but..” he trailed off.

“It’s okay. I understand,” Felicity assured him. “How’s McKenna?”

“She’s moving to Coast City to live with her sister.” Oliver pulled a chair up next to Felicity, much like he had that first day he walked into her cubicle with a bullet ridden laptop.

“I’m sorry.” Felicity said sympathetically. She reached her hand out, squeezing his arm in support.

“No,” Oliver shook his head. “I’m sorry. Helena-”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Felicity said firmly. “You have nothing to apologize for what happened with Helena and I.”

“But-”

“No buts. We all have that one crazy ex, I mean, there was this one guy from college. He wasn’t my ex, but he was definitely on the crazy side.” Felicity shook her head. She was getting off topic. “My point being. Helena’s actions are not your own. It wasn’t your fault, so don’t blame yourself. I don’t.”

Oliver could see the truth and her eyes and he felt relief that she didn’t blame him and while he still blame himself, he appreciated that she didn’t.

“I won’t let her hurt you again,” Oliver promised, and Felicity smiled softly, her hand moving down to squeeze his in thanks.

“I know.”

The belief in her voice touch something deep inside his chest. He felt a protectiveness come over him that rival the protectiveness he had for his family.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Oliver was sitting alone in the club when Tommy approached him.

“Hey. I, uh, heard about McKenna. You ok?” Tommy asked.

“Not really.” Oliver answered honestly.

“Look, I know that I have been a jerk lately,” said Tommy. He didn’t want to be walking eggshells around his friend. “I just couldn’t understand how you could keep such a huge secret from me. But I-- I never considered the toll it must take on you.”

“Lying to the people that are closest to me. It’s the hardest part.” Oliver confessed.

“I get that,” said Tommy.

Oliver exhaled deeply. “ I was wrong... to think that I could have it both ways; that I could do what I do and still have a normal life. With anyone.”

“Except if you’re alone, you’re never going to be happy,” said Tommy.

“Maybe not.” Oliver agreed. “But me being happy isn’t what’s important right now.”

Tommy wasn’t sure what to say to that, but believing his friend was wrong to a degree.

No one deserved to be alone.

#olicity fic #olicity fanfic #olicity #oliverxfelicity #oliver queen #felicity smoak #fanfic #fanfic: healing and scars #arrow #arrow fic

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gravitycoil · 10 months

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dream of 06/29/23

oh just remembered my dream I was on my computer I don't remember what I was doing exactly but I started to notice tabs opening on their own, my mouse moving on its own and I'm like oh no what the hell is happening then it started to open random videos and would full screen itself and I panicked and was like oh fuck someone is ratting me and I obviously know someone's fucking with me now and I open a notepad to try and communicate with them and I say "Whoever's ratted me, show yourself" and he types back something like "I'm sorry but I need your data. I'm not supposed to reveal myself like this but I'm new" he then shows me that he has my passwords and emails and shit and I'm like well... I can't do shit about this but to maybe get evidence that I was getting ratted I took pictures of his face, the info he gathered on me and our full conversation on my phone. I then realize he's probably watching me because I have a webcam and so I block it. I'm like desperately trying to change my passwords as well but I couldn't for whatever reason and the guy ends up showing himself by accident so I see his face and all I remember is that he had a black mask around his mouth and that it was extremely dark in the room he was in. He tells me it's nothing personal and he wants me to forgive him but I'm like fueled with hate right now but I don't tell him that I'm just like. ok... and I don't remember anything other than that

dream shift

Was on my computer again but this time I had a shitty laptop that was half broken open with semi exposed motherboard and the fan didn't work so it overheated a lot and sounded like someone screaming while it was on but I was on it and was playing sadx and I was playing through amys story but someone made a fan made sa3 mod and I was about to install it and play it but it was so beefy like way too much for my laptop to handle but I was desperate and hopeful that it worked and the moment I got it to run smoke started coming out of the laptop shjddfngf and I was panicking to myself and trying to close it down but I couldn't it was also weird cause it wasn't lagging at all it was just eating my resources hard and I just force my laptop to turn off via power button but it was too hot to press so I burnt myself to shut it off. It was also burning my legs due to the shitty fan and I just toss the laptop off of me and I'm like flabbergasted. I turn to my friend who was in my room with me and we had to do something I have no idea what it was but we had to put water in this giant tub container and mix it with soap for something and I was like "Ok we need to dump this-" and before I could finish my sentence my friend just no hesitation just pours it all on my carpet and I don't scream or anything but I'm somehow not surprised at all and I just grit my teeth finishing my sentence "dump this down the bathroom sink" and my friend was like "Well you should've told me" and I could feel the vein in my head pop and I was like panicking cause if my mom came in and saw the horror of like 7 gallons of water mixed with unknown substances + soap I'd get in trouble so I hurriedly get like a bunch of towels and I force my friend to help me and we place them all down but ofc if there was a bunch of towels on the ground that's sus so I take a blanket and cover it all I also needed to put constant pressure on the towels so they could soak up the water and for whatever reason I had this perfect cut square slab of wood that I placed on it and made my friend sit on the wood and my mom comes in doesn't suspect anything and leaves and I'm like Jesus Christ... it was a very weird and specific dream

dream shift

Was inside some long ass room where you had to make it to the other end while being chased by someone I remember it being really tense and scary at times because I would give up half way and just hide hoping I wasn't found but during the first half of the room you could take your time but once you were towards the middle that's when you started to get chased and it wasn't just that you were getting chased it was that once you got to the end you just have to HOPE you pull the right lever to get out and I lost twice in a row and I was like okay, how about you try it to one of my friends and he makes it out first try and I'm like ok... what the fuck. Do eventually I pull the right one and get out and now I'm like. out of bounds of where I'm supposed to go next like I'm standing on the void and there's like random debug objects around the void as well I know I'm not supposed to be there and I walk forward carefully as to not accidentally fall into blue hell but I make it to this sonic bounce pad looking thing and step on it and it propels me upward back into bounds and I just remember being really confused but I look around and I'm inside pokemon xy and I'm like oh yeah this is normal and I go into a random encounter and it was shiny and I was like FUCK I don't have anything for this so we stared at each other for a long ass time I don't even know what Pokemon it was it was some sort of fusion between Electabuzz and Beartic and it was giant and a legendary it's shiny was one of those barely noticable ones but I was still excited cause it was a random encounter and full odds. I don't remember what it's name was but it has like 4 arms and could float I think it was pure electric type. Anyways that's it that's all I remember

#post #beyond the tomb

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thegirlwiththestrangereality · 1 year

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Cumming, going, gone

I love pleasure. Always have. Since I was a kid I would find myself craving the high of my thighs rubbing up against each other and feeling the pressure build. When I was younger I couldn't put words to it but I would do it anytime I felt it. I remember doing it in my classroom, I remember doing it in my nana's living room. Often I didn't care who was around. I would try to not be obvious about it but honestly I did not give a damn. If I wanted to feel my "orgasm" I would feel it.

Growing up I would watch tv shows and movies and love seeing the actors kiss. I wasn't allowed to watch movies with sex scenes, I would always have to close my eyes when I was around my parents if it was a movie we were all watching. I didn't get to freely watch movies, they were always vetted by my mom. I wasn't allowed to read books with sex scenes. Nothing. I lived an incredibly sheltered life. Even despite this, I still knew I loved what I came to know as sex.

My mom would buy my dad playboy magazines from the liquor store. I didn't know what they were other than it had a beautiful woman on the cover but I knew they were behind the counter so it must be special. I would take the bus when I was in third/fourth grade so I had approximately 20-30 minutes by myself when my mom would leave for work and I had to walk to the bus stop. So I went looking for this magazine in their room. I found them in my parents closet on the top shelf. I found several of them actually. But I struck gold with the Kim Kardashian edition. Now that I think about it, this probably explains my previous obsession with her. LOL I took the magazines down, flipped through them, stared at these beautiful sexy women and would cross my legs and feel this beautiful sensation. I also admired the playboy bunnies Holly, Kendra, and Bridgett. I had to look up Bridgett's name, she was most definitely my least favorite.

I remember seeing them and thinking how stunningly beautiful they were. I knew I wanted to be that sexy. I knew I wanted to be in a magazine like that. Big tits, small waist, with beautiful hair and makeup. I wanted to be worshiped. And there is when my love of women began. haha I had a friend who lived in the apartments under me who was my age and we went to school together, her name was Shay. She was a funny spunky black girl. One day I went over to her house and her parents weren't home, and she went to a website and showed me porn. Holy crap I hit the jackpot. It was a funny video of someone getting caught having sex but just being able to see someone have sex, I lost it. I didn't even care that I was next to her, I rubbed my thighs together and released. I thought of that moment over and over again. I even asked her to do it when her parents were home and she said we couldn't. lol I guess a part of me didn't know what was wrong with it. or maybe my craving didn't give a shit who was around or who knew.

Fast forward a couple years, I got on my home computer and saw a website titled youporn.com in the search history. I didn't know what it was, but I kneeeeew I had to look it up. I went to my nintendo Wii internet tab, typed in the title and saw hundreds of videos of people having sex. It was amazing. The only problem was, Wii wasn't good for internet like computers so all I was really able to do was hover over the videos and watch the snips and see if it was something worth watching. But that would get the job done and I would tighten my legs and hump and hump until I could feel myself explode. I had opened pandora's box.

Once I got to middle school, there would be about an hour between the time I got home and my papa got home. I would hop on his computer and go to youporn and watch beautiful women. I would always see them rubbing their vagina's and not know what they were rubbing. I would try rubbing the top where their hair was and I didn't feel anything. I would try rubbing my ,what I now know is the clitoris, and didn't really feel anything. But when I rubbed my legs together I knew exactly where it was. And so I would hump and hump sometimes several times per week and have a great time.

As I reflect on my journey I see how this false portrayal of sex negatively impacted my understanding of sex. I thought good sex was all about the man. Pleasing him, with good oral technique, deep throating, ball fondling, titty fucking. I thought it was being submissive and being dominated. I thought it was aggressive and rough. I thought it was cumming on my face and spitting in my mouth. And yet, when I think of my relationship with sex now, I think only some of those things are true. I do love giving oral, but I don't like to be forced down. I like sucking balls, but I love eating ass more. I love to be submissive, but only when I want to. I like it aggressive, but it needs to be followed up with tender loving. I still love name calling, I loved to be called a bitch and a slut and a whore. I don't let just anyone cum on my face and I don't like spit in my mouth unless it's a quick small amount.

I had my first official orgasm when I was 17. I was having sex with my high school boyfriend and I was on top. I came and I came and it was amazing. Up until the point I had not known what a real orgasm was but whalah, she was amazing. To this day, almost all of my orgasms have come from being on top during sex. All but one.

What I discovered is a thick long cock would get me to orgasm when I was on top much easier than a small thinner one. And that began my journey into being a size queen. haha I was able to give myself an orgasm with my clit when I was probably 18ish, possibly 19. To this day I have never given myself an orgasm in front of someone watching me or on the phone. The closest I've gotten is cumming with Roman next to me while he sleeps.

As I write this a part of my soul feels sad but I am not sure why. Sad for the little girl who felt she had to hide this part of her. Sad she had a misunderstanding of what sex was and meant. Sad she looked for pleasure in partners who could never give it to her. It was a journey but now I guess I want a partner who wants to explore sex at the speed I want to and the pace I want to have it.

I feel Roman wants sex less frequently than I do. And when this happens I feel unwanted, ugly, fat, forgotten. But then I remember none of these are true and Roman simply doesn't have the energy center I have so readily accessible. I don't know what the correct answer is if there even is one. All I know is when I see this man I want to do nasty nasty things lol I love sex, i love the exploration of sex. I love challenging all the ideas of what taboo is. I love watching gay porn. I love watching men jack off and hearing them moan. I love watching trans porn. Women with tits and a cock is hot. Like wow, you can offer me all the things that turn me on, that's amazing lol

It amazes me how us humans shun these parts of us. Keep them barried away as if they don't exist and yet porn consistently shows all that God craves. God craves the soft, and the hard. God craves the gentle and the domineering. God craves the woman and the man. God craves the quiet and the loud. God craves the private and the public. God craves the pussy and the asshole. Because it is all a journey into the discovery of self. And perhaps I want to get lost in the rabbit hole all the time and that is why I love sex, I am after the destination rather than the journey. I guess I want several journeys so I can get to 100 destinations lol.

What can I say, my pussy loves to be loved. To any loser that I gave access to before me, you better thank your lucky stars because I would not have given you access to me if I had known how magical this pussy actually is. I know for a fact, this pussy is life changing. I would love to be a man just to be able to experience me from a cock's perspective haha

anywho, may your journey of sex be one of non-judgement. May it be full of love and acceptance and may you live out all your fantasies because that is something we all deserve. have a beautiful day friends. until next time.

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