Does it matter?

Photos: 1. Blossoms on I think the plum tree, taken on film; 2. Jake Oettinger grappling with Miro Heiskanen while Jason Robertson and Roope Hintz look on; 3. Flowers and shadows at midnight.

Thinking about Loki and Mobius again

Cool dice and stargazer

(Also the vampire one made me wheeze laugh so hard I snorted XD I was like nah I ain't saying that one about anyone 💀)

Everyone has diagnosed me as "Cool Dice" It makes me wonder if I should post a picture of my neat socks collection.

Also... Stargazer is so VISERALLY accurate, I'm surprised not many people got it sooner.

I was a Honor Roll straight A kid who didn't need to study or learn any life skills because schoolwork just came naturally to me and a lot of the subjects in school, like reading, science and art... and the basic academics were my special interests at the time so I did well.

When I went to college, I think I got my first Cs in classes that I genuinely loved and thought I was to be good at. Like Theatre, Photography and Psychology. and then I cried cus I thought I was dumb and not good at things that I loved.

No, I wasn't, I just didn't study and no one told me like that's what you HAD to do in college.

So like when... I tell Neurotypicals that I'm actually Autistic. They look at me so strange like... "But you did good in school!"

Yeah. And then I flounder later in adult life cause fundamentals weren't explained to me and quickly forgotten about.

I remember fighting with my English Teacher in highschool a lot because i said that "as long as the sentence makes sense in the context of the story, grammar isn't nessasary"

Which is probably something you see in my writing that I struggle with, and it's typically why I take so long because I keep trying to change the tense of verbage use to keep it consistent and second guess myself as if my fanfic is an academic paper to be graded. A horrible habit I know.

I'm also mildly dyslexic and horrible at spelling and cheated on all my spelling tests in Fifth grade and don't know how to spell to this day.

Spellcheck has been my friend, but since they integrated AI into it, lately spellcheck has not been picking up on my common misspelled words and usually recommend me different damn words then what I want....

buuuut...

Yeah. Sorry for dumping

Anyway. I have a lot of cool socks.

Something something so many horror movies base around high schoolers, I think there is a cool potential for a movie that the horror is a representation of the capitalist hellscape awaiting those teetering on the verge of adulthood. Or perhaps the horror itself is falling into completely separate paths from those you have spent the majority of your days with, in the same building, in the same structure of classes and homework and activities together, slowly everyone gets picked off and away, a group, a class, a whole generation whittled down until you realize you are alone with your horrors not because you have survived but because that was how it was always going to be. At its core much of horror can be boiled down to a gross aberration of the norm, a disruption of what “should be” or what always has been, or what one expects it to be. And no group is primed more in these concepts than teenagers, rung through their institutional learning, filled with hope or dread over their future, and inexperienced in the uniquely adult isolation that comes with legal independence in an individualized American culture.

Anyways, what if the real monster was the 20s you enter along the way?

is gale actually the worst guy alive or do people just have personal issues that give them a complex whenever someone else is a master of their craft and confident about it 🤔 hmmmmmmm

i think we need to address this @nmscord blog spamming the main nms tag (#no man's sky) into oblivion. this thing has to be run by some bot due to the constant posting.

it is the literal definition of a spambot.

at first i tried blocking this spambot but that somehow broke the tag??? the latest posts section was just empty, save for only 1 or 2 posts when there should've been a lot more. It goes for pc and mobile, you can try it yourself by blocking nmscord and then looking back at #no man's sky.

this annoying spambot is literally breaking the tag.

We must mass report this thing, i've already done it.

if we don't, it'll just keep on ruining the entire tag for everyone. so report it right now please.

if you can do that, then reblogging this post would just be as helpful.

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to be like frank here, redemption is an ever going cycle. when youve been the problem, the toxic ex, the abuser, you have to know you will have to apologize for that for the rest of your life. you will always have to live with the guilt and conscience of knowing how you hurt that person, or mutliple people. and you have to constantly CHOOSE to not repeat that behavior, and its not easy.

when you meet a new friend the topic of who you used to be will come up eventually, and if you have changed youll be honest with who you were. you cant run from it. you cant try to round the corners and make it seem like the other persons fault, or like it wasnt as bad as it was. its really really scary. because everytime you open up about it, its not just the wound of guilt but its also the fear that theyre going to look inside and not like what theyll see.

but you have to keep moving on and you have to keep being honest. and you have to remember that everyone is applicaple for redemption, you just have to work for it and admitting you were wrong with no buts is the first step.

I'm going to need people to realize that throwing a hissy fit over somebody gently or casually rejecting your offer to help them is going to make them SO MUCH LESS inclined to accept it in the future. And making it a point that they should have anyways, often through guilt trips, is going to motivate them even more to avoid you.

Especially if it's over something so fucking small like carrying something for somebody even though you know they can do it themselves and they're clearly not struggling.

"I'm just trying to be nice. 😤" If you're going to be like that then I have some bad news for you, you're not a nice person. You're larping one. "Being nice" to get some sort of mental or spiritual high out of it and throwing a fit when you're denied that isn't what it actually means to "be nice."

I'm not sorry but since fucking when were you entitled to using someone else to regulate yourself? Even through "nice" gestures like helping them with something? Especially if the only reason you're doing it is because you're bored?

"I don't handle it well." You can die of it for all I care once you've taken it to that point.

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About Show's voice

Honestly it's a good thing I go to Jrock one only for news, otherwise I'd be arguing every damn day. I go back to comments on A9's and Kiryu's hiatus in case sb heard sth more, cause some of those fans do live in Japan, but when I see stupidity I can't deal.

I saw people claiming that Show isn't a good vocalist, that that takes from their songs lately and that there was more passion in older songs etc etc. Let's talk music shall we? When you don't like a singer doesn't make them bad. It makes them not YOUR taste.

When A9 started their career Show's singing style wasn't "correct". There was more to his voice that couldn't be heard, cause of the way he was breathing while singing (many jrockers sing "with the nose" as you might have noticed or run out of breath easily and it takes practice to learn to sing while holding breath in the stomach and not the chest). However, at that time was also when Show's voice depth was showing better. Songs like Velvet are proof of that. All that changed later on, though. By the time songs like Gemini, Hana etc came to life, you could hear his voice was coming out smoother, it had highs and lows, nice turns etc.. PSC gave them a chance to a vocal instructor which believe it or not, not many companies in the vkei scene were willing to pay for. As long as the dudes were hot and were bringing people in, the companies didn't bother. Hell most bands never had a manager, it was usually the leader that took up all that work, while also perhaps composing or writing lyrics and designing, learning only through experience and asking around.

In recent years Show's voice seems to have changed again but in a different way (the flatness that comment I speak of, mentioned). After they left PSC, things remained the same for a few years but then it came. I notice the same change in Ryoga's voice (Razor, ex. BORN). Ryoga is one of the few vocalists that brings up what is going on in the scene regarding vocals and has been open about his troubles with his voice the last few years. Screaming fucks a voice up unless done right. Ruki's (the Gazette) screams seem to be less painful because he changed his technique. Still harmful but not as much as Ryoga's. Ryoga is one of those who goes to extremes though and has said that he will keep screaming until his voice dies. He needs a better instructor though and lots of resting cause he also deals with the second big voice killer in their scene and which applies to Show more too, since he doesn't scream much, the repeated lives. Vkei artists play way too many shows around the year, and not with breaks in between. They could be performing one afternoon, then run straight to a hotel, get their things, move to the next one and have only a few hours of sleep until the next show (I know every band in the world does that but to the extent they do it, there, is a bit too much. Also that + lacking guidance on how to deal with your voice shows us why so many vkei vocalists had to deal with vocal issues and losing their voice completely). Show has been doing that way too much, since he also belongs to a band that had many gigs and even though 2020 forced everyone sit their ass down and take a break, it already had done its damage.

It's not just a matter of passion to keep your voice healthy and tension up. Unlike other instruments like strings, drums etc, the voice is more delicate and even the things you consume can fuck it up. A guitarist won't lose his ability to play guitar if he smokes. A vocalist who smokes though will affect his breathing and vocal tone. If you want proof of why Show's voice could be sounding like that now, you can try singing one of their difficult songs. Try Gemini. The breathing in this song is crazy to me. If you like singing and know your breathing, try singing that song. Keep the highs high, no falsettos. If you aren't exhausted after that, either your diaphragm is a badass, or you do have better technique (most vocalists who've been doing this professionally can probably pull it off easily but it still is tiring). Imagine this song sang every day among other songs, for more than 1 year, shows that last 2 hours.

Show is a good vocalist, his voice simply isn't for everyone (no vocalist will ever be for everyone) and especially now that it's in a "weaker" state than what most people are probably used to.

i have a love hate relationship with studying artists bc i dont like the fact that just bc theyre dead and long gone we can comb through every inch of their personal life just to get one step closer to discovering their intentions when creating a certain piece. but on the other hand you really cant effectively analyze art without understanding the context and more often than not the context includes extremely personal details you wouldnt tell anyone but your closest friends and family. i hate that theres this expectation that your art HAS to mean something personal to you otherwise theres no point to it. isnt it enough that you look at it and create your own meaning?

The way yall assume the worst about vegans is absolutely tiring. Yeah dude i totally care about inserting my hands into your life and morphing you into the way i think you should be. I totally feel like i need to exert that energy towards you and that you dont have the criticial thinking ability to think about veganism and consider if you truly can or cant. I totally totally care about that dude. Goddamn. Just. so so much.

okay so I am quitting my job after a horrible day yesterday and I so didn't want to come in to my shift today because there was a huge thunderstorm and my intuition was telling me not to

But I was like oh it's courtesy and I don't want to make anyone stay, also I'll be with someone else so it'll be better etc etc

And the person I was supposed to work with called in sick :))) so now I'm by myself managing 3 middle aged men as a brand new staff

Like we literally have a deadlock on the door because they can do Very Real Bodily Damage to you and they really just threw me to the wolves

top 5 things people should know about sex

sex doesn't ever have to involve penetration or even genitalia if you don't want it to.

the lack of an orgasm isn't necessarily a sign that the sex was bad, and the presence of one isn't a guarantee that the sex was good or even wanted.

wanting or needing any kind of aides during sex - vibrators, other toys, more lube, pillows to prop up parts of your body, etc - is totally fine and doesn't mean that anyone isn't "good enough" as they are.

there's no guaranteed trick to make yourself a better sexual partner except for subjecting yourself to the mortifying ordeal of being known and just talking to your partner(s).

statistically speaking whatever you think is weird about your own body or sexual proclivities is probably pretty average.