#just sharing my own experiences and thoughts
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Honeymoon 🌹
Paring: Heeseung X male!reader
Genre: Fluff & Smut
Cw: heavy nsfw ;) cum inside, belly bulge, unprotected sex etc
Summary: You want to ride that crazy cow ride, so hee offers you a free ride.
Read at your own risk.
Word: 2.5k
Lack of massive perfect words, pardon me if it overdoes [words]
Getting married to Heeseung after knowing each other for quite some time was a great experience. He was lovely, is a gentleman, loves to take care of you, and he's also a grandma's boy. You've never seen him cursing or doing dirty stuff like normal adults do; instead, he was soft toward you, as if you were his diamond. Or maybe he never showed up?
He decided to take you to his home for your Honey Moon together since he wanted to show you where he was growing up.
You agreed without any second thought; before the next thing you know, you're already standing under the hot sunlight, shining through your hat. The wind, the fresh air, and the summer felt so ascending.
"This is amazing, hee!" You said as you breathed in the cold breeze to your lungs. This is better than city life 360°.
"I know you would like it, Bob. Now let's go to my grandparents's house; we're going to stay there for a few days." He uttered as a soft smile spread over his face, signing in relief as you loved his idea of coming here.
Arriving at the destination, Heeseung's grandparents immediately came out and greeted both of you with a warm welcome. Not only do they support you, but they also love you as if you're their grandchild and treat you like everyone else.
They help to move your luggage and stuff, even though you insist they should not; however, it won't work for them. They also prepared your shared room with Heeseung with a lot of decorations that fit your personality, which show how much they're dragged into your background.
Thanking them is not enough; you want to pay back for all their hard work by showing your gratitude. Again, they won't let you, as they said your presence was more than enough for them. You were touched by their words, as you're on the edge of a crying river, but Heeseung was there to comfort you, or else you would look so ugly in front of them. They're so sweet.
During the day, after spending a night at Heeseung's grandparent's house, they suggested your husband take you somewhere nice for your honeymoon because Heeseung is an outside person. He knew a lot of places, and he was born here too, so don't question him.
Your husband thought for a while before making up his mind by taking you to the racetrack, where people love going there for horse riding, competition, bets for money, and many more thrilling events.
Your eyes filled with sparks when he recommended Racetrack for your date. You immediately said yes in an aggressive, cute manner. He was giggling at your reaction, smiling from ear to ear as he adored you even more.
"Okay, then let's go!"
At the racetrack.
Heeseung brought two tickets for both of you for the show of horse racing. The horse racing was epic; you've never seen such a thing like this before since you're a city boy.
Now you've realized that this is better than any sports you've watched, and you prefer watching this instead of football because, why not? This is so addictive; riding at a fast pace, reaching for the goal, definitely gives the rollercoaster feeling.
The show comes to an end with a winner, the one you're rooting for as You scream in victory and celebrate the moment with other people. Your lover was standing there beside you, a bit jealous that you forgot about him; however, he just shrugged it off and formed a delightful smile. Seeing you're happy makes him happy too, putting jealousy back away.
---
Making your way back home, out of the venue, your eyes suddenly lay on a carnival event. It's a crazy cow ride, where many people come to challenge a bull machine that moves at a wild speed. You release your hand from your husband's grip before running to see. I left Heeseung all alone once again as he scoff in upset with your childish behavior.
"Love! Love, can I ride that?? It's so cool." You said your eyes turned into stars watching the kids ride that crazy machine. Heeseung narrowed his eyebrow and took a closer look as he shook his head as a sign of no.
"Awwae, why not? I want to ride that, please." You beg, with your puppy eyes, for your husband's permission, but still, he's disagreeing. As he intertwined your hand, taking you home.
"Nope bob! It's getting late now, and that thing looks dangerous. You don't want to end up at the hospital, don't you?" He responds, barely looking at you while he's talking, which upsets you even more.
"But come on, love, it was once. I swear, I rarely come to a place like this. Give your husband a chance, please." You left no choice but to try all your methods to melt his heart, but nothing seemed to work on him; he was already ignoring you.
You pout in disappointment; let it be as you let out a heavy sign as a result.
A few minutes later, he suddenly spoke.
"There's something you can ride at home; stop sulking or I'll kiss your swollen lips." He finally broke his silence. In return, a joyful frown appears on your face, jumping in happiness.
"Really, but what kind? Like that machine one? There's another place nearby your grandparents house." You started to question him with a lot of questions. He answered with only one word.
"You'll see yourself, and it's also the real one." Heeseung replies, bending down to your level before whispering to your ear in a low, seductive tone. His hot breath hits your skin, giving you unexpected goosebumps.
"Tsk, I'll look forward to it then, but if you're lying to me, you're dead."
Walking into the room, you throw your body on the soft king bed size; you didn't even bother to get changed since you're too tired to do so. You nuzzle your face, dipping to the bed sheet, breathing in no space air, before you feel a warm hug pressed behind your back with his head brushing into the crooked of your neck.
"Hmm?" You hum in response, asking what he wanted, until something poked hard underneath your tailbone. You immediately open your eyes from your rest, knowing too well what exactly he wants.
"Hee?"
"Yea?"
"..."
"Sigh* yes, I want to start this with you, love." Heeseung said, his tone almost sounding guilty. You roll your eyes, lost in thought, asking him to leave your body. As you turn around, look at your surroundings.
"Bu-.. Y'know, are you thinking what I am thinking? This is your grandparents house." You utter, almost whisper, anxious at the idea that someone might catch both of you doing this couple stuff in the house, especially his grandparents.
Heeseung laughed under his throat, with a mix of excitement and humor. He moved closer to you as he cupped your face, looking at your endearment.
"Love! Once I closed this room's door, not even a single fly could interrupt us. This room is noisy. proof even if you're scream nobody gonna hear ya~" Heeseung mutters as his gaze grows darker at the thought of having you under him. You almost jaw-dropped upon hearing the dirty talk from your husband. This is probably just the beginning; what will come more once he gets full control of you?
"Wow, you're something darling, I have never seen you're like this before." You stutter. His eyes are burning, full of lust and desire, like a wolf wanted to breed its mate, dominant them until they're satisfied.
You move backwards using the strength in your arm until your back hits the headboard.
"I want to make sure, do you really want to have s- uh se-"
"Yes, I want to fuck you, mn! Don't be shy; this is our honeymoon after all, didn't it?" He smirked as his hand traced down on your skin in ecstasy. Your breath hitched at his touch; he was so good at this. Not even a day you'd thought one day you would have sex with him, since he's too good at hiding his wild side.
"Now do I have your permission, my love?" He licks his lip, patting like a puppy, as he feels like his bulge is getting more painful in these clothes.
You nod slowly and accept your fate. Heeseung is full of surprises. Even though you're now his husband, there are too many things he is hiding from you for real.
He began to take your clothes off piece by piece until you left with nothing but a naked body, which turned him on even more at your milky smooth skin. The heat in his body is getting out of control, begging to claim you sooner.
He soon ripped out his t-shirt and unbuckled his belt.Now both of your clothes are all over the floor, and your two naked bodies lie on the bed, ready for the real moment to start.
"One moment, mn." Heeseung stood up on his feet, went to close the door, and locked it as he found something in his bag. Then he pulled out a labricate.
Your mind went blank. Question yourself about how the hell he had that without your knowing. As you deep down in your mind, you remember the word he said—that he would take you to the crazy cow ride—but look at you and him now—very unholy.
Unexpectedly, He pulls your hip with both of his hands, making your head fall to the pillow. He positions himself in front of your entrance as he puts liquid on his huge cock and your hole.
"Hee hee, this is my first time!" You state it out of the blue, which makes him tilt his head in return. You expect a shock reaction from him; however, instead of confusion, a big grin spread across his face. He looks really happy right now after hearing that.
"Even better, love; don't worry, I'll be gentle."
You gulp down, ready for what is coming for you, with a mix of thrilling and nervous.
Without further ado, he put a tip inside you, and as a result, the two of you moan in unison. His head was big enough to spread your hole, rolling his hip to warm you up to get used to his massive size.
"Please put it in Heeseung; I want you." Your words slipped out of your mouth after you adjusted to the warm skin inside your asshole. His crotch was so big that you wanted them pulsing inside you to ruin your beautiful pink hole.
Heeseung didn't waste his time, pushing his shaft all inside in a swift motion. Once he's fully in, he begins to move slowly, still respecting your first-time experience.
His cock is not going to lie; feel too good for you to not grip on the bedsheets underneath. He's making your body tremble and shiver as a small belly bulge is visible on your skin, even though he's just pushing at a slow pace.
"Faster love! I want faster; I don't care anymore." You said this as you were still catching your breath at his slower speed. What will happen if he pounds on you like an animal?
"Your wish is my command, my little husband," he said, squeezing tight on your leg and throwing both of your legs on his shoulder. The next thing you know, he slams his crazy big cock inside you at rapid speed. Not even warning you.
Thumps thumps
The wet noise started to occur in the empty room, and with every pound he pushed in, his lower abdomen was always pressed against your butt cheeks, making you squirm in no time.
His cock spread your wall, almost tearing you into two, but as he continued to fuck you in, the painful feeling faded away, leaving only the arousal inside. Since this is your first time, naturally, your ass is clenching on his cock like a baby grip.
He cried out in gasps; your hole sent a shockwave to him. As he continues to grind his hip, jerking inside you, chasing for pleasure and climax,.
He increases his speed with every thrust once he gets full control and access to your body when your entrance gets used to his cock.
You catch out of your guard, and after he quickly changes his position, he puts you on top of his stomach, still buried inside of you, as he lay on the bed instead.
"You said you want to ride a crazy cow ride; go on~ ride me as you please, babe!" Your eyes went wide, realizing he's behind this. Your gaze softens, leaning down before you bite his bottom lip, kissing him in passionate tension. You no longer be mad at him because he's making you feel good right now. He returned your kiss, lurking his tongue inside your mouth with his wet saliva, eating you two in one at the same time.
"Fuck uhh," you quake, feeling a jolt send all over your body as your body signals your about to cum.
"Hee-ahh, narggg, I will cum on you. You want it?" You become more breathless with every thrust he pushes in, his finger still busy spreading your hole to take him all in.
"Don't hold back, love~ cum for me; now would you like it if I filled you in?" He's too close to the edges, hitting you in every sweet spot. He asked for your permission once again if he could spill his cum inside your hole. You nod aggressively without even answering him.
In the very last few final thrusts, his tip crushed on your G-spot, making you go insane for a sec, as your cum splashed out on his toned abs, unable to hold in.
"HOLY MOTHER FUCKER AHHH," your chest heaving in an error motion as you arch your back, throwing your face above the ceiling, to the sensitive pleasure he's pushing you in.
"Ah-... Ahhh, mn, I'm comming b-brace yourself." With another one last push, his cock started to twitching as the warm, hot seed filled you in. He let out a heavy moan, like vomit, as he reached his goal.
You collapse on his body while his cock falls out of your hole, like a river of cum dripping out of your entrance.
"That was one of the hell rides, mn? How do you feel, Mn? Am I hurting you?" He presses a kiss on your forehead as he holds on to your waist, supporting your weight on his.
You inhale and exhale, rolling your eyes to the back of your brain, still feeling it.
"I never know. Fuck feel this good."
"So you want another round, mn?"
"No, but I want you in."
"Like, what love?" He asked your unfinished question. You couldn't explain what your desire was to him, so you snaked your hand before grabbing his cock and pushing inside of you again.
"I love how you feel inside; please don't pull out." You responded embarrassed, covering your face in his chest. He snorted at your reaction and boldness, as he started to love this side of you.
"Anything you want, little one~ not to mention that I could be there forever if you insist."
🗣️ please mind my English! ><
🗣️Reblog and like is much appreciated ♥
🗣️ crd to all pics÷rs
#enhypen#enhypen x male reader#enha x male reader#enha x you#enha imagines#enha fluff#enhypen scenarios#kpop x male reader#lee heeseung#enhypen smut#enha smut#enha x reader#enha scenarios#lee heesung x reader#lee heesung smut#enhypen heeseung#heeseung x reader#heeseung smut#heeseung fluff#enhypen fanfiction#enha fanfic#enhypen hard thoughts#enhypen hard hours
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Wondering your thoughts on something.
There are these questions floating around like the one you reblogged, of the flavor 'can [identity] [do something that is seemingly contrary to the dictionary definition of identity]?'
Do you think there's ever value to engaging with these conversations?
I ask because I think at some point, for myself, I was wrestling with 'can someone be straight and be with a non-binary partner' and there are layers to a question like that:
1. Can I maintain the stability and comfort and safety of my label despite who I love
2. Can I respect the identity of the person I love without changing my label
3. Is there some value to changing my label or keeping it
4. If I don't change my label but I feel queer can I still belong to a supportive community
5. [Externalized gatekeeping bullshit]
And I know the easy answer is, who cares do whatever.
But when you're in it, that's not an answer that feels productive. Like if I could have just done whatever without consequences I would have, but the consequences of deviating from or refusing to deviate from a strict definition felt very material.
Actually engaging with a sort of reckoning for stuff like that feels helpful. Reaching out to the queer community, seeking others who have wrestled with that question and found success, seeking validation in being strange that goes beyond 'everyone can do anything forever', I see the value in it. That's the community we're supposed to be cultivating, no? That's part of the support part, isn't it? Sharing experiences?
But I also see the value in saying, 'you gotta figure this shit out on your own,' because sometimes you gotta do that. I did. And my answer changed over time. It's just a very lonely process. And when we go through it ourselves it's easy to say, I did it, you can/should too. But then aren't we sitting at the whole 'I paid student loans so how dare they forgive student loans' mentality? Aren't we supposed to be making things easier?
All this to ask, isn't it better to engage with these questions in good faith than to assume it's gatekeeping bullshit? For the people it might help? Is 'you're fine, figure it out for yourself, don't worry about other people' actually engaging it in good faith?
I guess to me the issue is less that I'm against self introspection or that I'm assuming it's gatekeeping bullshit as like. what do you mean, "can x do y?" ? they're already doing that.
"can lesbians use he/him pronouns?" "can aseuxals have sex?" "can transmascs use the word tranny?" "can bisexual women call themselves lesbians?" "can you be trans without dysphoria?" "can a straight person be in a relationship with a nonbinary person?"
like... yes. of course they can. who's going to stop them? all of those things are in fact already happening and have been happening for longer than you can imagine. and the world kept turning. go drink a lemonade about it or something.
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Happy birthday, darling @wolfpants! I’m bringing you a banner with Draco on it since you share a birthday with him, what a fun coincidence!
When deciding how to celebrate you and your writing, I knew I wanted to do an author’s reclist but wasn’t entirely sure how to go about it because every single fic in your catalogue is worth a rec of its own. So I took inspiration from an ask game - a list of categories I could fill with my rambling.
I hope you have a wonderful birthday full of nice things! ILY! 🤍
🤍 A fic I want to read again for the first time: Under Giant Mountains (Drarry, E, 34k)
I thought about it for a long time because I would give anything to experience all of them for the first time again but eventually, I landed on Under Giant Mountains. It feels a bit sacred to me and I think it’s because I relate to this Harry a lot; because it’s a gentle story about healing; because it made me cry but in that really good, cathartic way. I think it will do the same regardless of how many times I read it.
🤍 A fic I reread the most times: Pages of You (Drarry, E, 102k)
According to AO3 the fic I have visited the most is Pages of You, which is no surprise. Do I share how many times I clicked on that fic? Is it embarrassing? Probably. Oh well, here it is:
Look, it’s my comfort fic, okay? What can I say - an 80s coming-of-age story? Sign me the hell up. In all honesty, I don’t really have words to describe how this fic makes me feel - it’s like a safety net for my inner child maybe, or something similarly, horribly cheesy. It’s a book I want to own, have on my bookshelf, and return to it over and over again. Maybe one day it will be.
🤍 A fic that made me (re)consider a ship: Spellbound (Draco/Albus, E, 2k)
So here is the thing - I’m pretty faithful to my favourite ships and don’t often read outside of them, except when it’s a rarepair that catches my eye and then I’m happy to be persuaded. And Wolf is brilliant at that, honestly, they could talk me into anything. And so even when it comes to a ship I didn’t know I needed, like Draco/Albus for instance, I just know that in their hands, it’s gonna be layered and thought-provoking and just so, so delicious. Here is the proof: Spellbound, a Dead Dove fic that is just the perfect flavour of dirtyhotwrong. Yum.
🤍 A favourite rarepair fic: Galvanize (Scorpius/Ron, M, 1k)
Speaking of rarepairs. Wolf has a whole collection of kinkuary fics, which is a rarepair heaven, go forth and pick your poison. I’m gonna go with Galvanize, in support of Hot Ron Agenda ™. It’s an M-rated Scorpius/Ron fic and the dynamic here is unmatched - so innocent and yet. Gah!
🤍 A line from a fic that’s haunted me: Waiting for the Moon to Rise (Drarry with a hint of Bill, E, 9k)
This is hard because I can think of many (see QQR) but if I had to choose just one, it would have to be this masterpiece:
—his voice had been thick, Draco remembers that, because he’d been eating an apple stolen from the kitchens on their way outside. He kept trying to get Draco to eat it too, playfully pressing the bitten edges to his mouth, damp like a kiss, until Draco had pushed him off him with a laugh— “stop that, Potter, or I’ll shove it someplace where it’ll hurt ”—and all the while, his lips had tingled with sweetness, a phantom caress he would take to his bed later that night and think about with his hands while the rest of the Eighth Year boys would sleep and snore, none the wiser—
Which is of course from Waiting for the Moon to Rise, featuring an intimate friendship, lots of UST and Bill the matchmaker 😏
🤍 A fic that ripped my heart out (but it hurt so good): The Hollow (Remus/Draco, E, 12.5k)
Oh boy. We’ve all read The Hollow, right? Right. It’s one of those fics I think about so often it can’t be healthy and yet I can’t go anywhere near it again because I don’t think I would survive a second read. It’s so, so, so good. It’s so painful. It’s everything I want from the pairing. I never want to see it again. It carved itself into my heart and will stay there forever.
🤍 A fic that made me laugh: Romp and Circumstance (Drarry, E, 33k)
So. Many. Wolf’s banter in fics is unmatched but for the sake of this game I have to say one, so I’ll go with Romp and Circumstance - and as much as this fic is hilarious, it’s also so full of love and longing and romance. It’s so vibrant! A perfectly executed AU with characterizations that are just chef’s kiss!
🤍 A song I now associate with a fic: Everybody Hates a Tourist (Drarry, E, 52k)
I will always associate Common People by Pulp with Everybody Hates a Tourist. I remember sitting in a beach cafe last year and the song started playing and immediately transferred me into the holiday vibes of the fic. I’m obsessed with both Harry and Draco in this story: with who they are, separately, and eventually together. Their characters are written so brilliantly here; they’re both given space to grow into themselves, into what they want out of life and their getting together feels like the most natural thing in the world.
🤍 A fic that’s between me and my AO3 history: Seat You Higher than the Stars (Ron/Harry, E, 1,8k)
Ha! I have no secrets or shame. Nothing is just between me and AO3, I’m an open book and will shout about it, and especially about this fic I thought was fitting (pun intended) for this category - just look at the tags: emotional vulnerability and fisting (elmo fire emoji). This is Seat you Higher than the Stars, a Ronarry fic that has got to be one of my favourite things ever written. It’s so tender and beautiful!
🤍 A fic that feels like a warm blanket: Thickets (Drarry, E, 17k)
That is *exactly* how reading Thickets feels. Oh, this fic. So gentle and mature, full of soft, quiet pining and second chances. It’s so atmospheric and nostalgic. Layered with complicated grief and vowed with humor and warmth, this fic is simply stunning. It’s a getting back together story that feels like a deep exhale. It’s melancholic and hopeful and it has one of my favourite characters of all time - a portrait of Young Draco to perfectly illustrate just how far current Draco has come.
🤍 A fic I want to be made into a film: Led by Light of a Star Sweetly Gleaming (Sirius/Remus, E, 53k)
My Wolfstar-loving heart could not forget this story - in a way a prequel to Pages of You but also a standalone fic set in the '60s. Wolf’s worldbuilding and attention to detail really shine here - it would make such a stunning film! But it’s not just that, it’s the characters, too, where the magic lies: completely in awe of each other and unbearably lovely. “You’ve no idea how much I want to worship you.” will be forever my favourite thing Sirius has ever said.
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Simverse Magazine welcomes you 🎙️💌
Hello, everyone! I want to share with you an idea I have been working on for some time.
Some of you already know, some of you don't, but I'm coming to you with the intention of creating a kind of magazine about life in the sims - about life in the sims universe and your characters in it.
If you like to play gameplay, tell stories, or create art, or are interested in building, or make lookbooks, this is all about you!
More details below 👇
The magazine will be published in an electronic flipbook format at the end of each month.
To give you a better idea, I've highlighted a few sections:
Fancy look - all about fashion and style, about models and lookbooks. If you are a creator you can offer your cc, or if you like to make lookbooks you can make one for the magazine and I'll mentioned you!
You can also choose how the page with your lookbook will look like or I will do it for you)
examples
Frame code - something similar to the Fancy look, but in this case, cc does not matter - it is creativity and your characters or edits, or any visual experience that comes to the fore.
Maybe it's a portrait, or a rendering, or a game photo. Just send me a picture and I will publish it with you as the author.
examples
Life as it is - all about the life of your sims. If there are any events that happened in your game that you can tell us about, or if your original characters have their own hobbies or adventures, you can tell us about them! I think this can be done in the form of an article. But you can also share your suggestions and we will discuss them.
Time to talk - an interview format in which we will talk to your character and ask a few questions.
Chili pepper news - news about events in the community within the sim universe: challenges, quests, events, anything that unites more than one simmer and their sims. for example: bachelorette show!
It can also be significant events that relate to your game and your universe.
Sleepless town - it's all about rumors, about the game, about its lore and its locals. if you like to explore the game and know a few interesting things or play as the original inhabitants or make makeovers, then this is for you
Time machine - a section created specifically for past eras and simmers playing in decades. Includes all other sections in own way.
Focus - dedicated to real events and the movement associated with them. This is an opportunity to highlight interesting topics or tell about your culture in the form of a sims. Whether in the form of an article or a poster. example: pride month
Comfy space - everything about construction, interiors and lookbooks for build/buy objects.
This is the entire list for now. If you have any thoughts, questions, or suggestions, don't hesitate to ask me about it.
If you have something to share, or have questions or suggestions, please send me a direct message. You can also send a request to my inbox, but please don't hesitate, I'll be happy to see you!
Terms of Use
Please don't claim as your own. I realize that this is not an original idea to make a magazine about sims. But SIMVERSE is really something I work on with interest and love.
Previously @auroragoth has already published a similar magazine before, and we have the same idea of what it could look like.
Thank to her for supporting me! ❤️
DNI: racists, homofobs, terfs and other shit
Please, don't use perma paywalled cc. I want this to be available to every simmer.
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A night at Delux
Modern Tommy Shelby
Master list
Author’s notes: This story is for you, in no particular order @zablife @runnning-outof-time @red-riding-wood @teenwolf-theoriginals @justrainandcoffee @brummiereader I’ve had the main idea in my mind for weeks after driving past a luxury restaurant daily, I think it’d still haunt me if I didn’t write this one down lol… anyways I decided to a few names of lovely mutuals. This is a small nod to you all for the amazing work you do and in an attempt to cheer you up or anyone who might need it at the moment. If for whatever reason you feel down, without inspiration, worried, or anything else, know that it will pass. This particular moment that feels like too much won’t last forever ✨I just hope/wish you get what you are looking for. And to anyone else going through anything hard right now, this is for you too!
Ps. Don’t panic the fandom isn’t falling down, I just felt the need to dedicate this story to lovely mutuals to spoil and cheer them up a bit 🤗
Last but not least, extra 🌟 to @blondie-22 for creating this gorgeous moodboard!! 💖
Word count: 3,245
Friday night had been quiet compared to today, it seems like everyone decided to go out on Saturday and go to that club, as if there wasn’t enough options in the city.
Y/N swallowed hard feeling worried, this was her second weekend working at the club and she wanted to give a good first impression and save as much money as possible.
Her other job as secretary paid for the rent and services, but she needed to have this second one on the weekends to support her grandmother and her medicines.
As the hostess, she was requested to wear a total black outfit, so she thought her little black dress was the right choice, it was fitting for her shape, it wasn’t too revealing or short and one of the girls, Red had suggested spraying some lidocaine on her feet to be able to stand all night in those heels. She quickly adapted well to the group of girls that worked there, they were all so nice to her and welcoming.
“Ready? I’ve an amazing list prepared.” Lee, one of the girls walked past her, ready to take her place at the DJ booth.
“Last week was hectic, I’ve a feeling this will be crazier.” Y/N expressed fiddling with the guest list for the night.
“Here, drink this.” Brummie, another of the girls came closer placing a glass next to Y/N. After a week, Y/N learned the reason for that nickname was her strong Brummie accent even after all the years she left the place.
“Go easy on the drinks, she makes them strong.” K chuckled. She was the first one to welcome Y/N into their little girls-gang as they called themselves. The only ladies working in a place owned by men.
“Doors opening in ten.” The manager advised, taking one more look at the place, waiters were ready. “Make tonight a good night everybody.”
Lee started playing the music then, experimenting with some new beats, she mixed a couple of the new hits. Lights down, Y/N took a deep breath, approaching the door.
“They better leave good tips tonight.” Red raised her eyebrows. She was in charge of promos, she was great at convincing people to order another round of shots, or if it was ladies night and they got 2x1 on special drinks.
“We’re in your hands Red.”
“I’ll do my best ladies.” She replied through the device they shared to communicate.
“Alright, it’s about time.” Y/N rolled her neck. “Lee, we’ve a party of six tonight, celebrating a bachelorette, could you include some anthems?”
“Absolutely darl.” Lee then turned up the volume of the music.
“If someone sees that baker, let me know?” Rose appeared then at the bar, she had been hiding in the office, she was in charge of detecting any potential trouble from the monitors.
“Sweetheart, everyone knows he’s not a baker.” Lee informed her, talking about Alfie.
“I haven’t seen him, so I wouldn’t know.” Y/N called from her place.
“Oh he’s just the most handsome man ever.” Rose swooned.
Y/N chuckled, the club would be the last place where she’d find love, she just knew that. Walking towards the door, the guard opened it for her.
She started searching for the name she was given in the guest list. A group of girls wearing exaggerated make up and deep cleavage plus the shortest skirts or dresses where the firsts ones to make it in. She was totally against it, but it was an unwritten rule to let people in, the more skin, the better.
But she wasn’t there to judge anyone, let the girls dress as they preferred, in the end she wasn’t the one getting wasted and dragged in the end of the night to throw up outside. She was there just for the money. Another table was filled by three men, they were older and dressed in button shirts with ripped jeans, as if it was an uniform for them.
Y/N thought how it was funny to try to guess their backgrounds, where they came from and with whom they might leave the club. She was just trying to make the time pass faster.
In no time, the club was packed, but outside there was still a bunch of people trying to make it.
People tried to give Y/N money to get in, some were even rude to her but the guards took charge into the matter and invited them to leave.
“I made a reservation, could you check again?” The young guy requested politely.
Y/N started reading the names again, but by the corner of her eye, she caught someone skipping the line. “Ah, excuse me? Sir?”
The man who was already by the door, turned around slowly, opening the zipper of his jacket. His death stare made Y/N feel a shiver running down her back.
“There’s a line you’ve to make and wait.” Three more men arrived and stared at her with amused expressions. “Name?”
The man blinked and rolled his tongue over his lower lip. “Shelby. But you won’t find my name there, love.” Y/N saw him stopping the three other men with his hand.
“Then you’ll have to wait in the queue.”
For an instant, his expression was so transparent and Y/N knew he was offended.
“I’m sorry, but I’m just following orders.” She apologized and shuddered under his intense blue irises.
“Oi!” One of them, the one with a mustache tried to step closer.
“Arthur, leave it, we’re going to follow this lovely lady’s order and wait.” He then turned to face her again. “Accept a sincere apology for trying to get in.” He then winked.
The well dressed men followed his instructions and stepped back. Then she focused on the next people on the guest list, guiding them inside.
Barely a minute went by when Lucas, the manager grabbed her by the arm, dragging her inside in a blunt movement that made her go alert.
“What’s wrong with you?!” Lucas snapped, spit flying from his mouth. “You left the Shelby brothers outside! The fucking owners of this place.”
Just as Lucas was explaining Y/N her mistake , Tommy walked behind her, with his brothers following his steps.
“That was a first Tommy.” John grinned. “The first woman who doesn’t let you walk in as the owner of the place, and you did nothing.”
John was definitely having fun at Tommy’s expense. Arthur couldn’t help the smirk on his lips, but he tried to hide it behind his hand.
“Yeah, yeah she was only doing her job.” Tommy tried to excuse the hostess.
There was something that took him by surprise and startled him.
“And you walked back to the queue like a dog with the tail between the legs.” John went off again.
Tommy dragged his eyes across the club, he needed to know more about her. So he walked towards the bar.
“The usual Mr. Shelby?” Brummie asked her boss from behind the bar, he always waited to be served at his table.
Slowly, he posed his eyes on her, considering his options. “Please.” He replied then, clearing his throat.
“Here you go, I’ll take the other drinks up in a second.”
“Thank you.” With a nod, he turned his back at her and slowly strolled across the club. Although he had security, he always checked his surroundings.
After a while, he found the manager. “Lucas, come here.” Patting him on the back, Tommy asked him about the hostess, she was just passing by in that very moment, but Tommy noticed the quick glance she threw at him.
“Again, I’m sorry it happened Mr. Shelby, she’s new but it won’t repeat.”
“No problem.” He added calmly. “What do you know about her?”
Lucas shook his head, he didn’t care about the staff personal life. “Not much, but I’ll investigate her.”
In that moment, Tommy’s eyes found her, arms linked with the girl in charge of the checking the credit cards records.
“Damn it, I made a huge mistake, I’m so so done.” Y/N cried in a low voice. Worry written all over her face.
“What did you do?” Rose squeezed her shoulder.
“I didn’t know it was him.” She babbled. “I asked Mr. Shelby and his brothers to wait in line for their turn to get a fucking table.” Y/N explained over the music.
Rose stared at her for a split second and then bursted into an incontrolable laugh. “No you didn’t!”
“I did Rose! I did… and now he’s going to fire me.”
But she kept laughing. Trying to take a deep breath she sent their chat group a message urging the other girls to meet in the back.
You’re not gonna believe what Y/N did, she’s a hero! - she announced proudly.
“I can’t imagine the face he put on, must’ve gone like a stone.” Rose pinched her arm playfully.
Lee programmed a couple of songs to play automatically, Brummie left the bartender in charge while she claimed a quick bathroom trip. Red rushed the guys on the table to pay her for their drinks and tip.
As the group gathered in the back, they we waiting eager to hear what had happened.
“Our newest friend here, made the boss wait in line to get a table.” Rose announced ceremonially, pointing at Y/N.
She wasn’t trying to make fun of her, just trying to have a moment to relax.
Y/N groaned mortified, she kept shaking her head. Overthinking of what would happen.
“Nice way to get the Shelby’s attention.” Red pointed at Y/N with a smile, enjoying the teasing.
“Can we ask for the CCTV footage?” K asked. “I want to see him in the line.”
“I was looking for you,” Isiah one of the blinders appeared suddenly, “ladies how are you doing? Y/N… Mr. Shelby wants to see you.”
A chorus of ohhh’s from the girls filled the space.
Then, the girls started cheering on her.
“There she goes.” K sighed.
“Do you think she’s in trouble?” Lee looked around the group.
“Well it depends…” Red crossed her arms. “Hopefully he’s in a good mood.”
“I doubt it to be honest.” Rose raised an eyebrow skeptically. “But maybe she knows how to tame the beast.”
“Oh oh, if there’s group meeting it means something happened?” Mia joined the girls, she asked permission to arrive later that day. She had some personal affair to attend.
K placed her hands on Mia’s shoulders. “You just missed the fun, but I’ll make a short version while we prepare some drinks.” They were both in charge of the bar.
“Last time we had an urgent meeting, Michael got arrested.” Mia remembered with a chuckle.
“Oh, this is better than that.” Red assured before going back to the crowded tables.
As Y/N followed Isiah, her heart was pounding, grabbing her phone she texted her friend, Heidi.
I think I messed up, BIG.
A quick answer appeared on her screen, in the background a themed photo illuminated the phone, beautiful shades of green reminded her of nature and hope, it was made by a really talented friend.
What happened?! Are you OK?
Yeah. No… I confused the owner of the club and asked him to wait outside and make the line!
Her phone buzzed again.
No way! Tell me how it goes.
If I don’t reply back he probably let me blind. Carries a peaky cap with a razor blade.
Y/N took a deep breath and checked her phone again.
Don’t worry, I’m sure it will be fine. Her friend encouraged back.
She just prayed to not mess it up again and start babbling, arriving at the private area where the Shelby’s were she quickly tried to fix her short hair and bangs.
“Good evening,” her voice was shaking, her legs and her heart, everything! “I’d like to apologize for what happened earlier, I’m new and didn’t know any of you.”
Her eyes landed one more time on who seemed to be the leader, those icy eyes boring into the deepest part of her. His lips were pursed in a tight line.
“It’s okay, love. Don’t worry.” He couldn’t take his eyes off of her.
“Yeah, now me brother wants to find a way to speed the line up.” One of them explained, blowing his smoke towards the ceiling.
“John.” The man with the blue eyes warned. “Nevertheless, I’ve to thank you for keeping the line in check.”
His deep accent and the way he dragged each word gave her chills.
“Thank you, well that’s my job.”
“Here drink this.” Another of them, the one with a mustache offered her a glass. “To a very good job!”
The two youngest were whispering something and staring back at the leader.
“It’s alright, really.” Tommy assured her after seeing the fear in her eyes.
“Just make sure it doesn’t happen again.” The one he called John a moment ago suggested.
“Again I’m really sorry.”
“Y/N is it?” He rolled his tongue over his lips after saying her name. “It’s alright.”
“Just so you know, I’m John, so you don’t mistake me again.” He had a huge grin on his face. “This is Finn, Michael and Arthur.” He started pointing out at everybody. “And that’s Tommy.”
“I won’t forget your names.” She repeated them mentally. “Enjoy your night, I’ll bring you another round.”
Y/N excused herself and went back to work. He was wearing a simple white shirt with a jacket and black jeans, but somehow he made it look effortlessly good. She was trying to focus on the people in the guest list instead of those eyes that reminded her of the most beautiful sky.
She smiled at a couple that walked past her dancing to the beat of the music.
A table next to her exploded in shouts and claps as K and Mia arrived with their shots and sparklers.
From the second floor, Tommy was watching her every move, eyes following her everywhere, studying her moves and the way she approached clients.
Arthur waved his hand in front of Tommy’s eyes after he didn’t listened to what he said.
“Tom? What do you think?”
Finn nudged John’s arm, tilting his head towards Tommy.
Tommy took a long puff of his cigarette, pretending to be part of their conversation.
“Hmm?”
“Earth calling Tommy.” John teased. “He’s still waiting outside in the queue.”
Shooting John a death stare, he asked Arthur to repeat himself.
“Shall we call some women up?”
“Whatever.” He cleared his throat and stood up making his way through the club.
Talking to security, they informed him they kicked out a customer that got noisy and aggressive, but other than that, it was a quiet night. Everything seemed to be under control, the place was packed, everyone wanted to get in, live the experience and have the status only Delux could offer. He knew it was the best club in town, many club owners tried to copy his place, but they all failed, they tried to copy the details that made his club unique, it screamed luxury and good taste.
Eyeing Y/N across the club, Tommy decided to walk towards her, she was focused on the list before her eyes, swaying her hips to the beat of the music, pouting her lips murmuring the words… he could only imagine how would them feel against his, while his fingers tangled in her short hair.
Before he could reach her, she then turned her back at him to walk in the opposite direction, but abruptly, she changed her mind and turned around again, bumping into Tommy’s chest in the process.
“Mr. Shelby! I’m really sorry.” He could tell she was mortified, embarrassed.
“It’s alright, sweetheart.” Tommy reluctantly took a step back.
Y/N hoped her voice wouldn’t crack. “Do you need something?” Battling her lashes slowly at him. “Can I take you your drinks upstairs?”
He was startled by her overwhelming beauty, under some kind of spell by her voice and smile. It had been so long since he felt so captivated by someone… Shaking his head slowly to clear his mind, but she thought he was saying no to her.
Taking that as her cue to leave, Y/N started walking away. “Well if you need anything, let me know.”
“Actually I do.” Tommy managed to say, making Y/N turn to face him once more.
Everything happened in a blink, he grabbed her by her face and kissed Y/N, not able to resist the desire any longer. But when she answered the kiss with the same eagerness and placed her hand on the back of his neck to pull Tommy closer he lost it.
Guiding Y/N towards the wall, he trapped her between it and his body.
Kissing her hard, he tilted his head to the opposite side, relieved to feel her matching his desire. Feeling one of his hands, brushing down from her waist to her hip and then down her leg, she added some pressure on his shoulders.
“Someone can come.” Y/N warned him breathlessly, his lips barely away from hers, just what was really necessary for her to speak.
“I don’t fucking care, I own this place.” Tommy told her right before kissing her again with passion.
Squeezing the flesh of her thigh and he felt as if he had whiskey injected in his veins.
Y/N moved her head back slightly, that left Tommy with his mouth hanging open in an almost sensual kiss that had just slipped away from him. Opening his eyes after the failed mission, he found her bitting her lower lip playfully.
His blue irises darkened under the dim light.
“I really need get back to work or my boss might fire me.” Y/N explained before stealing one more quick peck on his lips and bending down to free herself from him, left Tommy leaning against the wall with his heart pumping so fast that it felt like he was having a heart attack.
He chuckled quietly at her statement.
Going back up, he stood looking down at the people at the club, his eyes scanning the place until he found that pretty little thing that with just one kiss, made him feel more than anyone else.
Feeling som eking of pressure on 5e back of her head, Y/N turned around and lifting her eyes, she found Tommy staring at her from the second floor. Raising his glass at her, he added a wink.
Y/N felt her cheeks blushing and smile quickly spread on her lips. Checking the clock, she walked towards the door it was about time to not let anyone else in.
“Your lipstick is smeared dear.” Mia pointed out.
“Damn it, really?” Worryingly she went back to the bar, to check her reflection on the mirror behind all the booze bottles.
As the girls started to ask her what had happened, she got another message on her phone.
Think you can send me back to the line twice and get away with it twice? Meet me in my office once you’re done. -Your boss.
She gasped. He oozed trouble from every angle, the one that won’t let you get up from bed after several rounds.
He was practically the bad boy your grandmother warned you about.
✨ thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed a little spiced story 🔥
Tag list: @lyarr24 @runnning-outof-time @cillmequick @datewithgianni @cloudofdisney
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#that’s what Cill said#modern tommy shelby imagine#modern!tommy shelby#tommy shelby imagine#tommy shelby x reader#tommy shelby fan fic#thomas shelby fanfiction#thomas shelby x reader#tommy shelby x y/n#tommy shelby x you#peaky blinders fan fiction#modern peaky blinders#arthur shelby imagine#john shelby imagine
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@nonbinarylocalcryptid has put this au in my head so here are some headcanons for Odysseus adopting Astyanax instead of killing him
When Odysseus finally gets home, Astyanax is ten and Telemachus is twenty, about to turn twenty one
Astyanax is incredibly furiously jealous of Telemachus. He doesn’t know who this guy is or why Odysseus is so obsessed with him. He isn’t used to having to share his dad’s attention
He tries to come up w ways of getting Odysseus to focus only on him but he’s never successful. Either he gets in trouble for doing smth bad or he tries to start a game and it gets turned into a whole family activity
He gives up after a few weeks and sulks by himself exploring the palace and city. Odysseus eventually finds him and they have some much needed one on one time. Astyanax is ecstatic
Telemachus is incredibly furiously jealous of Astyanax. He doesn’t know who this kid is or why Odysseus is so obsessed with him. He isn’t used to having to share his dad’s attention
Him and Odysseus are trying to make up for lost time and Astyanax keeps bursting in and being super annoying. He’s so glad every time Odysseus shoos him away. He desperately needs this one on one time
Astyanax isn’t sure abt Penelope. She’s very nice, makes an effort to connect to him, and Odysseus hasn’t stopped raving abt her for as long as he can remember. But hearing abt someone in a story is different from actually meeting them. She a total stranger. He warms up to her after a while but for the first month or so, he’s very shy and apprehensive around her
He doesn’t consider her his mom tho, only Odysseus’ wife. He used to think calypso was his mom (she would be the first woman he would be old enough to remember and they lived w her for most of his life) but now he’s content to not have a mom. He only needs his dad anyway
After about a year or so, both Astyanax and Telemachus begrudgingly accept that they’ll have to share Odysseus. They’re both not thrilled abt it but they’re not angry anymore either
Telemachus is a self sufficient adult at this point and spends a lot of time doing his own thing. He’ll go on trips, go hunting, attend his parents’ court, try to woo maidens, debate policy and philosophy w the advisors (which can get pretty complicated when his parents join; his dad especially loves having battles of wits), etc
Astyanax is a preteen and very curious abt what Telemachus is getting up to and what the adult life of a prince is like. He followed him secretly at first but quickly got found out. Telemachus thought it was kinda weird at first but then was a little flattered
He started letting Astyanax accompany him (to an extent. Long trips and wooing maidens are off limits lol). But he’ll take him to court, on quick trips, to his fighting lessons, to intellectual debates, etc.
Penelope isn’t so sure but Odysseus is adamant that learning by experience is just as valuable as structured lessons and they should just be happy that they’re finally getting along lol
The only part he has a problem w is the trips. He’s already anxious when Telemachus leaves on his own but when he takes Astyanax too… The thought of potentially losing both his sons, them taking years to return, or them being harassed by the gods eats him alive. It’s terrible to watch. He doesn’t eat, barely sleeps, doesn’t do any work. The only thing he does is sit by the door to the palace and wait for them to come back. Not even Penelope can soothe him
It’s worse when they go on a boat. Even if they’re only taking a one day trip to the city next over, he’s literally shaking w stress. Instead of sitting by the door, he’ll sit in Poseidon’s temple and do nothing but pray for their safe passage, not stopping at all for food or sleep
Telemachus has offered to leave Astyanax so he feels a bit better but he insists that he’s fine. It’s more important that the two of them bond, form good relations w their neighbors that will benefit them when they’re the king, and become more worldly. He’s fine. He swears it. He’s fine
Telemachus has taught Astyanax how to shoot a bow, how to track animals, how to identify plants, and how to basically do anything that doesn’t involve living on a boat lol
They’ll spar too. Astyanax is much better than Telemachus was at his age and Telemachus is a little jealous abt it. If he didn’t win anyway bc he’s bigger and stronger, he definitely would be angry
It’s weird tho bc he’ll be like “how did you learn that move? It was super advanced." And Astyanax will just casually be like “dad taught me after we fought a harpy.” And Telemachus is reminded that this kid has spent more time w his dad than he has. He never got to have his dad teach him how to fight but this other kid did. It’s not fair. He pushes it deep down and ignores it
Astyanax is aware of what happened to his biological family. Odysseus told him when he was eight. He was a teary mess, barely able to get the story out, but Astyanax wasn’t distraught like Odysseus expected. Astyanax was quiet for a long time, thinking, then went off on his own for a while but by the time it was night, he seemed to have moved pass it
He didn’t remember that family so he wasn’t very upset. He definitely thought it was messed up that he was taken in by the enemy that killed his whole family and destroyed his city but Odysseus was nice and it beat being killed too so he wasn’t complaining
Sometimes he’ll lay awake and wonder what his life would’ve been like if he had grown up in Troy tho. How his biological dad would’ve raised him. How different his life would’ve been if he hadn’t been constantly moving around and fighting for his life. As a kid, he can’t even begin to imagine what that would feel like bc he’s never known it. But by the time he’s grown, it’s different
Telemachus is on the throne now; Odysseus retired and just hangs around now. There are rumors that he's gone mad and even tho it's 100% false, he does nothing to stop the rumors bc he thinks it's funny and likes to mess w ppl
Astyanax is in his mid to late twenties now and he's feeling like he doesn't belong in Ithaca. He looks different from the rest of his family, he's got a much darker and complicated past than most of them, and every time they talk abt war in the court he can't help but get angry and closed off
Tho to Telemachus' credit he's a very fair king and does his best to avoid war and getting involved in other people's wars. That's how he lost his dad for so long and he's not making Ithaca go through smth like that again
Astyanax decides that he needs to see Troy. What's left of it, any new civilizations that replaced it, anything he can find. He's a little worried about the trip across the sea but figures if he did it once before, he can do it again
There's nothing when he gets there. Most of the wood has rotted and the ground is black and charred. He can walk the Greek camp based off the burnt fire pits, the tent peg holes in the earth, and the rotted outlines of the thick wall. The field in between the camp and Troy is littered with swords, spears, arrows, shields, and the occasional chariot wheel. Troy is a ghost town. The only thing left are the great walls. The inside is baren and empty
When he returns, he's furious. His "dad" destroyed his entire civilization. Except for him, no mercy was shown. It was a horrible, monstrous thing to do. (He's forgotten the memory of how much Odysseus cried telling him what he did)
He goes off on Odysseus. Odysseus is partly resigned (he knew this day was coming and he’s in the wrong) but he’s still a stubborn ass who resorts to violence instead of talking things out so the fight gets pretty explosive. It stays an argument but only just barely
They both have swords in their hands when Telemachus comes in. He tries to talk them down and pretends he doesn’t know what the fight is abt even tho the whole palace can hear them yelling
Astyanax asks for Odysseus to be executed, banished, or otherwise punished in someway. Telemachus won’t do it. Astyanax is furious that he’s not taking his side. Telemachus didn’t see what he saw. He didn’t lose his whole family and get kidnapped by the man who murdered them. He has no idea how it feels to have your whole world flipped on its head
Astyanax debates fighting both Odysseus and Telemachus but decides against it. He storms out, gets on a boat, and goes back to Troy. He wanders around there for a while until he finds a civilization to join
Years go by. Odysseus dies, Telemachus has his own kids and grandkids. His hair is starting to go gray. Then one day a messenger runs in announcing the approach of a foreign army
Telemachus runs out to see the threat and a fleet of twelve boats is abt to enter Ithaca’s harbor. At the prow of the biggest one is Astyanax, torch in hand. He’s going to burn Ithaca like they burnt Troy
The prophecy is fulfilled
#sry this started out cute w family fluff then got dark#odysseus#the odyssey#epic the musical#Astyanax#Telemachus#Penelope
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My 10 year Tumblr anniversary
June 2024 marks 10 years since I started this blog!
I originally began this blog as a way for me to follow discussions taking place on Tumblr about important topics in the LDS community, like racism or Ordain Women, which couldn't be discussed in mainstream LDS spaces.
I soon found the LGBTQ+ LDS community which called themselves queerstake. I would message them and make comments on their posts, and they gently encouraged me to write my own blog posts to share my thoughts with others. I resisted, thinking I had nothing of value to add to the conversation and no one would be interested in what I had to say. I finally wrote my first blog post in June 2016 and it was about meeting the Sistas in Zion and sharing that I'm gay and the kindness of their reaction. That post got exactly zero likes or comments, reaffirming my belief that I didn't have anything of interest to share. I didn't write another post until August and it got a few likes and that was enough, I wrote several more posts that month and haven't stopped.
I used to go to blogging sites to find blogs by queer Latter-day Saints. Their stories resonated with me and felt important. Usually they began with someone coming home from their mission, which they hoped would be rewarded by God removing their gayness, and being disappointed or surprised this didn't happen. They expressed a commitment to staying in the church, but as the months went by they more and more wrote about the hurt they experienced, the pain of church policies aimed at them, insensitive encounters with church members and leaders, and anger at things said in General Conference. Typically there would be entries for a few months and then the blog goes silent, no more entries.
I would think of not just how important these blogs were to me, but in some distant future they would be of interest to historians wanting to better understand what it was like to be a queer Mormon at a time of big changes in society and the LDS Church.
Most of those blogs were written by folks in their 20's and lasted just a few months to maybe up to 2 years. I thought perhaps writing as someone in their 40's would add to these voices, and for it to matter I needed to be authentic in sharing my thoughts, feelings and experiences, showing the good, bad, and ugly. I honestly was surprised and thrilled if I had a post reach 40 or 50 likes, and was unprepared for having a post in 2017 get clicked on more than a half-million times.
Since my viral post, I had a number of younger queer people following me, I still wanted to be honest and authentic and vulnerable, but I also wanted it to be a queer-positive space. I reblogged things from others, I posted lots of rainbow-themed posts so that visually it's clear this is a blog of a queer person.
I started getting many messages with questions, often anonymously which meant the only way I could respond was by posting my answer to my blog. I soon felt like I was the Dear Ann Landers of Queerstake and have posted about 2000 responses since 2017, which averages to about 150 such responses per year.
Because queer people usually don't grow up being taught about queer history and culture, I will occasionally make posts about such things, including about LDS queer history because as a queer Mormon, I can be proud of the LDS pioneer and pioqueer legacies.
The person who started this blog 10 years ago could never have imagined I would be out to everyone in my life, and once I was out that I would still be a member of the LDS Church and get to meet General Authorities, that I would have my words published in books, be a guest on podcasts, or serve in the leadership of an organization (Affirmation) for queer people. It's been a wild ride.
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As someone who's nonbinary, the thing that made me leave, the last straw, was this blog's response to David Tennant and Georgia Tennant's awareness and shown methods of support when it comes to trans and nonbinary rights, once one of their kids started to use they/them pronouns.
Georgia, as any parents should in this situation, started using they/them pronouns when talking about her child. She also got passionate about the subject at hand, did not only continue to show general support for the LGBTQ+ community over social media, but specifically informed about trans rights and nonbinary people, was loud and proud and adamant in sharing posts and sources, still is. That's her child. You can tell how fiercly protective she is.
The response of this David/Michael blog and the followers was that they just hope that Georgia is being genuine. That they just hope that George isn't exploiting her child. That this could go backwards, should her child change their mind. That they hope Georgia isn't pushing her child into a direction, because of how much attention she's drawing to them, because they're so young, are they sure they know who they are? And hopefully, her support isn't just for the views.
Yeah. I don't think I need to explain to you how problematic that dislike of Georgia disguised as concern for Wilfred was, but I explained it to that blog. I used my own experience of gender identity and support I wish I would have gotten, when I was young, as an example, and I was super friendly, not even on anon. The ask never got answered.
Then David started to wear the nb-pin, started speaking about supporting nonbinary folks, and you know what the response of the woman behind the blog was then? Still is? It's so nice to see David getting so emotional over trans rights and queer identity. He's officially wearing the pin for Wilfred, yes, but one can't help but think that he's actually also wearing it for himself.
Needless to say, I lost it a little. 😅
ALL OF THIS RIGHT HERE!! ALL OF IT! They will throw shade at her loving her child. One of them called it white woman activism and then praised David in the same sentence.
they also used the fact that apparently she was a producer on a "lesbophobic" movie (as a lesbian I never thought it was lesbophobic and nobody else has really thought so either) as a reason to minimise her support and love for the LGBTQ community, while David was a lead actor in that movie but we'll just keep quiet on that one right?
I'm sorry you had to deal with that anon, these people are ridiculous.
#david tennant#michael sheen#anna lundberg#good omens#doctor who#rpf#staged#georgia tennant#🌞nova#sheenant
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this may be a silly question
how do I become a girl when I am very much not one
oh! oh how do i phrase this in a way that's believable and succinct...
basically.. you can decide yourself!! if you want to be a girl.. you can just be a girl. contrary to what society demands, there isn't really a rulebook or guideline. you don't have to adhere to what society believes a girl is. being a girl is something in your heart and mind!!
i urge you to spend time with other trans people. learn about their experiences, share your own. there's a lot of different steps you can take to help you feel more girl, if you decide it's for you! i think one of the most common steps other trans people take (other than a change of wardrobe) is hormone replacement therapy. it's something that takes time and patience, but for many it's what helps them feel more comfortable. if you feel comfortable with what the effects of that is, it might be the sort of thing for you.
i'm just a silly girl online. so, i'm not sure how much help i could really bring to a conversation like this. but!! there was a time i too thought that i couldn't ever be a girl. i felt like my body and face weren't the right shape or my hair doesn't work right or i'd just not pass or whatever. but the truth is, girls can be any shape. boys can be any shape. when it comes to biology, some shapes are just more likely than others depending on how you're born. my little secret for self confidence is knowing that: 1. im a woman, 2. i love women. 3. i love myself!
basically.. well... believe in yourself!!! i know it can be tricky, but!! you can believe you're a girl and love yourself for it!!
#i don't know how helpful you may find this...#but!!! i feel like.. this sort of sums up the sort of exploring i've done in a few sentences..
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Let's say Mc having a nightmare so they are either screaming or crying in their sleep. So how would the Ro's react and feel during that? (dating stage)
(This is written under the assumption the MC and their RO have reached the stage of sharing a bed.)
S: S is a light sleeper, so with the first sign that the MC is experiencing discomfort, they switch on the bedside lamp to distinguish just how violent the terror might become. They don't want to risk you hitting your head. S has lots of experience dealing with these sorts of things. With a calm voice, they just begin talking to you, reassuring you whilst you sleep that you aren't alone and are safe with them.
On the outside, they are the picture of decorum. On the inside, however, their heart is breaking. It isn't fair. You deserve to rest from the thoughts plaguing you while awake. If only they could take your burdens from you and place them with their own.
Rain: Rain begins to panic. They see your crying face, and suddenly, everything S taught them about dealing with their night terrors if they were to occur goes out the window. They can't remember? Can they touch you? Are they supposed to wake you? Please, MC, please don't cry. They scoot closer to you, doing what they feel on instinct, and wrap you in their arms, placing your head on the chest. They don't know if it's the right thing to do, but they want you to know you aren't alone.
Taj: Pretty similarly to Rain, they panic. For a brief moment, they think there's someone in the room attacking you, and they reach for the knife they keep under their pillow. They pause when they turn and see you're alone but still in distress. Then it dawns on them; you're sleeping. Taking a deep breath to soothe their hammering heart, they turn over to carefully nudge their body so it's pressed against yours, sliding an arm under your head. "It's okay, Koel. I'm here."
Their brows crease in distress at the thought of you battling demons they can't fight.
N: N would do what they always do, be as intrusive as possible. They've done it before. When they wake to find you mumbling in your sleep, sweat running down your brow, they sigh. "Oh, dear. It seems I've let my guard down. Allow me, my dear." With that, the little magic they have left begins to explore your mind, weaving in a distraction; a nice thought, your favourite song, a kind word. When your features soften into something peaceful, they smile.
Umbra: Umbra is already awake when you begin twitching and mumbling in your sleep. They turn from looking out the window, their chest tightening at the sight. Umbra's first instinct is to think someone is magically weaselling their way into MC's dreams to consume their soul. They have heard of such creatures. "MC, wake up! Please, wake up! Please!" When you shoot awake, in more panic than before, Umbra's hesitancy surrounding touch evaporates as they embrace you tightly. Umbra is a little embarrassed once you explain what a night terror is. "I'm sorry, MC... How do I protect you from what isn't real? What do I do?"
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Sorry, but this is gonna be long.
I posted this on our-queer-experience, but I thought I'd share it here as well with a little more information. Basically, I fell down the alt-right rabbit hole during Trump's presidency. It was something like 2015-2016; correct me if I'm wrong, but that was a long time ago, and my memory is fuzzy. You know, when the whole "SJW gets owned" videos were popular.
Then around 2018, I was a radfem/TERF (gosh, this is embarrassing). But around 2019, I found this trans YouTuber, Samantha Lux, who pulled me out of that manhole. I was still unlearning the transphobia that was fed to me, but oh boy, is it similar to how right-wingers think. The whole 'us vs. them' mentality, the 'enemy is both strong and weak' type of thinking (acknowledging that trans people are a minority and don't matter, while at the same time claiming that trans people are everywhere and are dangerous, out to get you, and you should be wary of them).
This is so humiliating for me to admit, but I used to be a Nazi around 2015-2016. They had their stereotypes for a lot of minorities, one of them being Jewish people having big, hooked noses and other antisemitic shit. Just like them, TERFs had their own stereotypes for trans women and how to spot them, one of them being... you guessed it! Having big noses! To TERFs, having a big nose makes you a 'male.'
Right-wingers used to, and still are, calling Michelle Obama a man and making up conspiracy theories about how she might be trans. Exactly like them, TERFs would accuse any woman of color, especially Black women, of being a man for apparently not fitting Eurocentric beauty standards.
I read this TERF glossary someone posted on how to spot TERF dog whistles, and I've noticed that most of them originate from 4chan (and they still are using these dog whistles to this day despite where they started!). So this was my story. There's probably a lot more, but this is all I remember. Again, sorry this was long.
dw about it being long!! but thank you for sharing your story, I love hearing people talk about their pasts and how they came to be the person they are today, ESPECIALLY when it's a redemption arc :)
also, I love Samantha Lux!! she's an awesome YouTuber, and deserves literally the world (so do you, btw)
again, thank you for sharing your story!!
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Reporter! Reader x Prohero Izuku Midoriya
As the first rays of the morning sun peeked over the horizon, the city of Musutafu came alive with the bustling energy of its residents. Among them was y/n, an ambitious reporter for the city's leading news outlet. Today was a special day, one that had the potential to define y/n's career. It was the day of the much-anticipated interview with the Number One Pro Hero, Izuku Midoriya, also known as Deku.
Arriving at the agency, y/n couldn't help but feel a mix of excitement and nervousness. The towering building was a symbol of hope and safety, a testament to Deku's dedication and tireless efforts in protecting the city. With a deep breath, y/n walked through the revolving doors, greeted by a friendly receptionist who guided them to the top floor.
The elevator ride felt like an eternity, but finally, the doors opened to a spacious, sunlit office. There he was, Izuku Midoriya, standing by the window with a warm smile. His presence was as commanding as it was reassuring, his green eyes sparkling with a kindness that put y/nat ease.
"Welcome! It's a pleasure to meet you," Deku said, extending a hand.
"The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Midoriya," y/n replied, shaking his hand firmly.
"Please, call me Izuku," he insisted with a grin. "Shall we get started?"
The two sat down, and y/n began setting up the recording equipment. As the interview commenced, Izuku spoke passionately about his journey to becoming the Number One Hero, the challenges he faced, and the values that guided him. His words were not just inspiring but also deeply personal, revealing a side of him that few had seen.
"You've mentioned before that being a hero is not just about strength, but also about heart. Can you elaborate on that?" y/n asked.
Izuku's expression softened. "Being a hero means more than just defeating villains. It's about empathy, understanding, and the willingness to go above and beyond for others. It's about being a symbol of hope, someone people can rely on. Every decision I make is guided by the desire to protect and uplift those around me."
As the interview progressed, y/n found themselves captivated not just by Izuku's words, but by his genuine sincerity. It was clear that his heroism stemmed from a place of deep compassion and unwavering resolve.
After the formal questions were over, there was a moment of silence, a comfortable pause that allowed y/n to gather their thoughts. Izuku took this opportunity to turn the tables.
"You've asked me so many questions about being a hero. But I'm curious, what drives you in your work as a reporter?"
Caught off guard, y/n smiled. "I guess it's the stories. The chance to uncover truths, to share experiences that can inspire and inform. Much like you, I want to make a difference, in my own way."
Izuku nodded thoughtfully. "That's a noble pursuit. Our roles may be different, but our goals are very much aligned."
As the interview concluded and y/n began to pack up, Izuku extended an invitation. "If you're interested, maybe you could join me on a patrol sometime. See the world from a hero's perspective."
Y/n's heart skipped a beat. "I would love that. Thank you, Izuku."
With the promise of future adventures, y/n left the agency with a renewed sense of purpose and a story that would undoubtedly touch the hearts of many. Little did you know, this was just the beginning of an extraordinary journey alongside the world's greatest hero.
-Chiearsworld💋
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Character Study & Rewrite: Colin Bridgerton vs. Lord Debling
First of all, I want to say that I really enjoyed Bridgerton season 3, part I. However, that is mainly because I enjoyed the side plots more than the main plot. A main reason why I didn't enjoy the main plot as much is because I believe that Colin Bridgerton's character arc could have been dealt with better, especially since Penelope Featherington is a more established character than him in the previous seasons. This third season is the first season where we really get to see into Colin's mind and how he views the world and himself.
I know that Colin's character arc surrounds his struggles with finding his authentic identity and the costs of fitting in with the ton at the expense of sacrificing his own values when it comes to relationships. On the other hand, Lord Debling is a great foil to Colin because we see that Debling is content with who he is, despite how his "peculiarities" aren't accepted by the ton and how that extends to how the ton talk about him. Unfortunately, I don't think that the writers took advantage of their relationship dynamic other than to simply show that they both want Penelope's hand-in-marriage.
I believe that adding in scenes where we get to see Colin Bridgerton and Lord Debling interact with each other one-on-one or how they witness the other person interact with the ton would've have made the main plot much better. This would allow the audience to have a more transparent understanding of Colin's character arc and of his inner thoughts while also making Debling a formidable love rival for Penelope.
I know that this season has limited screentime and that the season is split in half with two different release dates so here is how I would have personally added into the existing scenes or rewrite the existing scenes in Bridgerton season 3, part 1.
Warning: There will be spoilers so if you haven't watched these episodes yet, don't read any further. I also haven't read any of the Bridgerton series and I didn't look so my personal characterization may be off from Book Colin.
Colin Bridgerton's Travels
Other than knowing that he slept around, we haven't gotten enough information about Colin's travels and what he ACTUALLY did in the 17 cities that he traveled. I know he talks about the contessa but even his "friend" group doesn't know the details so I think it would be great to have a flashback of what he actually did with her. Either the contessa he talks about was just a made-up story to fit in with the guys or he was a virgin when he slept with her and he doesn't want to share those details because that experience was very intimate for him in exploring how sex works.
I think that scene of Penelope reading Colin's notebook was excellent. However, instead of her reading his passage about sleeping around, I'd rather that she read a different passage that details his struggles of fitting in with the ton and how he thought that traveling to new places where he thought he could belong would help but it turns out that he couldn't fit in with these new people either.
Until he started learning the lessons of "charm" and other social behaviors that men around him typically adopt because it was better than being alone. I'd think the best origin story of where he starts to learn that charm can be taught would be in France, considering that that country is the one he tends to talk about most and because flirting is pretty common in France (though I admittedly don't have much knowledge on French culture).
That would explain why Colin's lessons for Penelope aren't on how to fit in; rather that she just needs to relax enough in order to stop fixating on what other people think of her and to be her authentic self. It tells us that Colin doesn't want Penelope to go through the same process he did because that require her to not be true to who she is, so he alters the lessons he's been taught (which is actually really good. Even though I know he's a writer, I can also totally see him as a teacher, teaching others about the lessons he's learned from life) These lessons also benefit Colin because it gives him a sense of purpose, something that he's been struggling to find his entire life.
After Penelope finishes reading it, have Colin flashback to his past travels so that the audience can see his interactions in person and how he slowly alters his behavior as he travels to each city. This serves to give Penelope and the audience further insight into his motivations and mindset.
I know that his travels were written in the story to develop Colin and show the audience how much he's grown from the past seasons. But in truth, Colin doesn’t need to have grown from his travels. This is a personal judgement, but it gives me the impression that in order to be in a relationship, one must be "developed" enough but that doesn’t need to be the case. Colin and Penelope can grow together, and I think that's beautiful.
Brothel Scenes
As much as I didn't like the brothel scenes, I know that they exist to showcase Colin "maturing" (and perhaps a bit for fanservice). Instead of omitting them altogether, here is how I would have rewritten the scenes. Have Colin feel pressured by his "friend" group to participate in a group orgy at the brothel. That way, we see the clear contrast of his friends having a good time compared to Colin, while also participating, is clearly shown to be uncomfortable or less active about it than his friends. Maybe he tells them that he'd rather have privacy, but his friends make fun of him for acting like a prude or somewhere along those lines where his romantic nature is made fun of or is seen as childish.
This way, it would be a full circle when Colin tells them off at the end of part I, stating in these exact words, "It is tiring, is it not? The necessity imposed on us to remain cavalier about the one thing in life that holds genuine meaning." I absolutely love this moment when Colin dares to speak up because this is the first time we see him be so honest in front of them and it's amazing to see.
Colin vs. Debling
I would absolutely love Debling to witness Colin's flirting scenes in episode 1 because I think that he would cringe (like the rest of us) because let's face it, the lines are so cheesy that it would be comedic gold to see Debling have the same reaction as the audience.
Before Colin realizes his feelings for Penelope, I'd want Debling to interact with Colin’s “friend group” and have them talk about their respective travels to show the vast difference between his and Colin's interactions with the ton as well as the contrast between their characters. I think it would give us a lot of insight into both Colin and Debling as people, seeing Colin observe Debling and admiring (and envy) his quiet confidence to be himself.
Meanwhile, have Debling encourage Colin to stray away from the herd. We've seen how observant Debling himself is when he notes to Penelope about his intuition that Penelope can make someone wither if she wants to. And he is spot-on. I could see him totally knowing that Colin is trying to fit in, but he doesn't make fun of him; rather giving him advice on how to not care for what others think. That way, Colin's lessons to Penelope and Debling's advice to Colin end up backfiring on both of them which would honestly be funny to see.
In their interactions, have Debling share to Colin his need for a practical match because he plans to go on a 3-year long travel. At the end of part I, when Colin tells Penelope that Debling may not be the best match for Penelope because of his need for a practical match, it showcases how observant and thoughtful Colin is rather than simply acting out of jealousy.
Have Debling ask Colin about Penelope to get to know her more so that we can see Colin talk about his past with Penelope. This would be a good place to provide flashbacks of past interactions with Penelope. Show us flashbacks where Colin took notice of Penelope or admired her when past!Colin was too oblivious to notice it as anything more than friendship but looking back it now, present!Colin views those moments differently in light of his growing romantic feelings for Penelope.
The Balloon Scene
I would have Debling (instead of Colin) be the one to lead the charge in saving the hot air balloon and shouting commands to get the others, Colin included, to join in, capturing Penelope’s attention and awe (and the other ladies of the ton).
When Colin sees how everyone flocks to Debling for his heroic rescue, I want to see him insecure afterwards about how he wished he could’ve led the charge for once instead of always being in the shadows and following another person's lead.
Most importantly, he sees how the ton can quickly change the target of their affections from Colin at the beginning of the season to Debling, the one that people didn't talk much fondly of, provides Colin with more motivation to not follow with society but to follow his own heart.
Conclusion
To summarize, I want Colin to not just be jealous of Debling being the object of Penelope's attention but to also envy Debling himself because he wants to be like him because I think that would give Colin and Debling more complexity to their characters. With more insight into Colin's character and his embracing his true self in part I, it's going to hurt even more when he discovers who Penelope truly is and how her actions impacted his family.
Anyway, I'm super excited to see part 2 of Bridgerton season 3, especially after seeing their trailer, and I am waiting ever expectantly for it. Thanks for reading my long, semi-organized ramble; I had fun writing it, and I hope you had as much fun reading it!
#bridgerton#colin bridgerton#lord debling#rewrite#bridgerton season 3#character analysis#character arcs#bridgerton s3#bridgerton netflix#polin#penelope featherington#bridgerton s3 spoilers#bridgerton analysis#bridgerton character analysis#bridgerton character arc#bridgerton rewrite
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Today's musings are on the complex and fascinating bonds between humans and how those are viewed in various cultures. In particular, I want to talk about found family and my personal experiences regarding the topic.
First, I want to set the stage as to what larger cultural norms are at play for me personally. I'm a US American, generally raised in the South (though there were childhood years spent in the Southwest and Inland Northwest as well) who has, as an adult, largely lived in New England and the Mid-Atlantic regions of the US.
My bio family is...well the politest terms would probably be "a dumpster fire of generational trauma, dysfunction, and toxicity." Those relationships are complex and fraught with issues for the most part. I was fortunate to mostly patch things up with my dad before he passed and after he sobered up and acknowledged a majority of his fuckups as a dad. I still talk with my bio brother, and we love each other, but we're not particularly close these days. I haven't talked with my bio mom for twenty years. The only other person from my bio family that I'm close to is a second cousin who is only a year older than me and who was a dear friend to me growing up. Always felt more like a sibling than a cousin, to be honest.
Despite the lack of supportive and healthy relationships with my bio family, I have a wonderful found family that I've been a part of for more than twenty years. And the thing about familial relationships (found or bio) is that they are layered and complex, and sometimes it's easier to use shorthand to refer to relationships rather than a whole long ass story on how you are connected or, in the case of bio family, disconnected.
My found family is largely made up of a group of women and their partners, plus some of our extended friends. Most are in the same age range, with some variation. And we all consider each other family. For the core group, we tend to refer to each other as sisters, because that is the easiest way to explain our relationship to others. One couple tends to get referred to as the parental units of the group though we do not call them mom and dad.
One of the key reasons we end up using familial terminology to refer to each other is cultural expectations. These folks are my next of kin. They are the ones who will visit me in the hospital should something happen. It's a hell of a lot easier and quicker to say "sister" when visiting someone at the hospital, especially if someone is in critical care and only family is allowed. It was also easier when one of us had to go pick up one of the kids from school or something to be listed as their Aunt. People understand those relationship terms and it's shorthand to help you get through social situations without having to give a longwinded explanation of your relationship that makes you feel like the guy from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia with his conspiracy board.
Is this the case with all found families? No. Found families, like bio families, come in a wide variety of configurations. But I bet in certain situations, people do use shorthand just to bypass the cultural bullshit or restrictions that come into play (e.g. visiting someone in ICU). But I wanted to share my experiences and thoughts. Because I am getting a bit tired of some of the "stop using family terms for found family" dialogue. It feels a bit like a slap in the face and someone telling me that my lived experience isn't valid or real.
Like all such discourse, it is nuanced. I agree that people shouldn't police others' interpretations of things (i.e. tell someone they can't ship someone because they are siblings in a found family). But that is a different issue. One more related to people being unable to see that their interpretation doesn't supersede anyone else's--that there is no one true way to see anything. It's all filtered through our own experiences and views.
Human relationships are complex and varied across the board, and languages don't always have words to express those connections fully. English is fairly limited when it comes to words describing relationships. Add in that certain cultures, in my case US American culture, often favor some relationships more than others, and you have a bit of a mess that can make describing your loved ones and family challenging. It would be lovely if we could all keep that in mind when discussing these things. There are many ways to live your life and many types of families, found or otherwise. Maybe someone's experience is beyond your ken, but that doesn't mean it's less valid or real.
#v's musings#found family#life is far more complicated than many are comfortable with#I do wish folks wouldn't police others interpretations of fandom or life#but in bitching about those folks can we focus on their inability to realize that their head-canon is not actual canon#rather than invalidating others' lived experiences as a way of undermining those head-canons#not trying to speak for everyone whose main family is a chosen one#just sharing my own experiences and thoughts#fandom discourse#also life discourse#long post is long#but sometimes it takes a bit to say what you really want to say
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[blows a kiss out to sea] for the Mighty Nein pirates arc
#I'm!! I have so many thoughts about why this arc is SO GOOD#But the short version is like#It is an arc about Fjord and identity and power and self and agency as he faces the truth of his patron and faces a rival warlock#But it is ALSO about Fjord grappling with those things bc he is ALSO processing grief and sadness and a search for direction and purpose#and grappling with disappointing disillusionment in how the world and people in your life (including maybe yourself) isn't what you thought#and about coming to resolve he has the agency and strength to not allow these things to deter him from purpose and place in the world.#And—this is why this is a PHENOMENAL arc—so is the rest of the Nein. Individually and as a group.#All of them are grappling with feelings of grief and sadness and disappointment and directionless and helplessness#just the grand malaise and relentless shapelessness of what living often is#They also as individuals and as a group together also find that resolve and strength to carry on and find self and purpose and direction#They all begin to process the very same things in their own lives and in their shared experience as The Nein. Simultaneously and together.#It's an arc about Fjord and self and agency in the face of disappointment and grief and disillusionment.#It's an arc about the Nein—individually and as a whole—and self and agency in the face of disappointment and grief and disillusionment.#It's SUCH a strong arc bc ALL of them are taking the same internal journey—structured around Fjord's very externalized version of it.#And it's got incredible vibes (pirate warlocks of a leviathan!) and some GREAT set pieces. And every NPC in the arc is iconic as is Twiggy.#Anyway. In my feelings about this arc. I said this is the short version and yet.#Critical Role things#CR meta
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Endouma is a terrible ship, and here is why.
‼️WARNING‼️: Post not only contains semi spoilers for KNY, but it also contains mentions of things like suicide, depression and noncon/sexual assault. If you are uncomfortable with those topics, please refrain from reading.
TLDR: Enmu and Douma are not compatible with each other because that ship is mostly built up on fetished MLM tropes, overly sexualized versions of the characters and the romanticization of SA.
(God, I feel like I have been posting nothing but hot takes on this account as of late. I promise I will go back to posting art, cosplays, and more just chill stuff after this.)
Enmu and Douma are not characters that should not be shipped together, for multiple reasons. Starting off, THEY ARE NOTHING ALIKE!!!! I don’t know where or how it was decided that they were alike, or that Enmu is “Douma 2.0”, but it makes no sense. While both are meant to be irredeemable monsters, Enmu was an irredeemable monster from the get go. From what we know about his backstory, he knew he was scamming people and targeting the weak and vulnerable for it. Douma’s backstory goes a bit more in depth and explains that he was put into the role of “all mighty god” as a child, which lead to the power of it going to his head as he grew up. Douma was still an impressionable child who was failed by the adults around him, and as he grew up he took on some of those same traits as the adults he was surrounded by. The bottom line is this: Douma, while a shitty person, still has some way to sympathize with him, Enmu does not, and thats just on the story side of things.
Enmu and Douma also share nothing in common personality wise. On face value, they may kinda act similar (i.e how they talk (sorta)) but it really just stops there. Enmu ultimately had a goal to kill Tanjiro and gain more blood from Muzan so he could climb the ranks of the demon hierarchy. He wanted to gain more power and to overthrow one of the upper moons for the sake of power. He doesn’t care how many people he has to torment, hurt or kill, as long as he has spot in power, he is happy, hell, he literally has vulnerable and even sick children do his dirty work! Enmu is a sick and twisted individual and he prides himself on that. Douma on the other hand put on the happy and up beat facade to hide that he knows he was failed. Douma is aware he was failed as a human, and so he decided to fail his followers by being the embodiment of false hope. He plays into the false icon lifestyle by pretending to be hopeful and happy around his followers and even the other demons to an extent. He doesn’t care so much about power, rather he cares more about control. Douma keeps up his false religion persona to keep control over his followers. He knows he’s failing them, but he doesn’t want to lose the control he has over them.
Now onto the elephant in the room: the mischaracterization I’ve seen of both of them in the Endouma ship. In both fanart and fanfics I’ve seen and read (well more so forced down my throat since thats all I’ve seen with Enmu in recent times) both Enmu and Douma are mischaracterized to high hell just so we as the reader/viewer will feel pity for them. I’ve seen more of this with Enmu, in that all the stuff that made him unique from the other KNY demons is stripped away so his “savior boyfriend” Douma can comfort him and coddle him. Now, writing an AU is one thing, but if you’re just going to make content of the ship with the characters as they are in the series, then their actual personalities should be honored or at the very least acknowledged.
Going more in depth about the mischaracterizing I’ve been seeing with Enmu, almost all (ALMOST all, not all in general) Endouma content I’ve seen have made him either a depressed and anxious baby that Douma is meant to coddle, or an overly fetishized hyper feminine man thats there simply for sexual reasons. It just goes against their roles in the story of KNY.
Going off of the hyper feminine man mischaracterization of Enmu I’ve seen in regards to the Endouma ship, having him be pretty much a “femboy” not only contradicts him as a character, but it also is pushing toxic heteronormativity on a queer relationship. Making Enmu essentially the “woman”, while putting toxic heteronormativity in a very much MLM ship, it also just boils him down to a sex object and nothing else. Now, I will not say that portraying Enmu as a very sexual and even gross character is wrong, because there were plenty of scenes in KNY of him that had very sexual and perverted undertones, but that is what they were, undertones. There is more to his character than just the sexual undertones he has (as I stated earlier when describing him), and by boiling him down to a “sex doll” for Douma just kind of shows that there wasn’t much of an understanding of his character while making the ship art or a fic. He is much more than a sex object.
Moving onto the mischaracterization I’ve seen of Douma, while not nearly as bad as Enmu, it still feels very off from his character. Making Douma someone who GENUINELY cares for another person is also very contradictory to how he acts in the series. He is someone who cares very little for anyone he comes to meet, whether it be his followers or other demons. Now you may be asking “but, Ink! Douma saw Daki and Gyutaro when they were on the verge of death and decided to save them!” Which is exactly what I am talking about. The only reason he “saved” them was to keep up his facade of a savior and to get himself “brownie points” (for lac of a better term) so his public appearance would look good. Because he cared very little for Daki and Gyutaro, it shows that he only cares about looking like a good person and nothing else. Portraying him as essentially “Enmu’s therapist” that coddles him and such just feels weird. Douma has no emotional connections to anyone, so why would he have an enmotional connection to a demon that is considered lower than him?
Now similar to what I said about Enmu earlier, Douma is also much more than a sex obsessed pervert. Douma being portrayed as basically a male nymphomaniac in the Endouma ship is a very strange way to portray his character. Yes, he may have been fine with letting women seek refuge in his temple, but again, it was to make him seem and look like a good person. We should all know, or at least have the understanding that Douma is literally a woman eater. The women he houses in his temple ultimately have the fate of being nothing more than food. Viewing his reason for taking in women as something sexually driven is a complete misunderstanding of his actions. This misunderstanding of Douma paired with the sexual misunderstanding of Enmu not only creates a toxic relationship, but it also fetishizes and sexualizes MLM pairings. This is something I’ve noticed more in Endouma art, but a lot of it that I have seen feels very fetish-y. I can’t go too in-depth about this aspect, as I am a queer woman, but the way the ship is portrayed in a lot of the art I have seen of it feels as though it is pandering to the appeal of yaoi obsessed straight girls. While yaoi has been a term used for decades to refer to MLM based pairings in media like anime and manga, over the past couple of years, its meaning has become more based around fetishizing MLM pairings rather than just being about MLM pairings.
I now want to bring up something that I’ve seen associated with Endouma (and also the Enmuzan ship, but that is a topic for another time) that really makes me uncomfortable, and that is noncon and the romanization sexual assault. I don’t want to talk too much about this topic, as it is not only triggering for me, but it should also be common sense that fetishizing sexual assault is wrong. Again, this is more so something I have seen in artwork, but it seems almost normalized for Douma to be portrayed forcing himself onto Enmu. Now, I know you are all probably saying “Ink, if you don’t like it/are triggered by it, then don’t interact with it”, but when its all that has been made in regards to newer Enmu content as of late, and how people are hyping it up, its kind of hard to avoid. It makes me truly question just how many people really missed the point of their characters, and only focused on things like Enmu being more androgynous, and Douma being tall and muscular. In a general sense, if a ship is built on, or is popular from fetishized and romanticized sexual assault, it shouldn’t be a ship.
Finally, I just want to mention that these characters have NEVER once interacted in canon. I know that hasn’t stopped people from shipping characters before, but it’s just something I want bring up. (As well as the fact that the Upper Moon’s hate the Lower Moons)
I want to end off this post by saying that all of this is by no means targeted at a specific person, nor am I trying to say that my opinion is correct. I am just stating my own opinions and just stating observations I have made after being in the KNY/Enmu fanbase for nearly 4 years now. People are allowed to ship characters together (within reason) however they like, but just be aware of how it will look on your own part, and what views it may look like you have.
#squidposting#inkposts#ink talks#enmu#demon slayer#Endouma#lotus dreams#Enmu X Douma#kny hot take#I will reiterate from my last paragraph that I am by no means trying to target any specific person#I am just sharing something I have noticed about the Endouma ship#and how it makes me a bit uncomfortable#if you like that ship it is completely fine#like I said I’m just sharing my own opinions and thoughts#as well as my own experience with content of that ship#I also wanted to provide my interpretations of both characters to also just kind of back up my opinions#so it wouldn’t look like I’m making baseless claims and such#again I am not targeting a specific person I am just stating opinions and observations I’ve made
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