#it's killing me bc it's pain in the ass to match | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

faetreides · 24 days

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you nailed how i imagined modern!feyd to be (batshit crazy) but you think he‘d let cute hello kitty reader put like stickers and bows on his motorcycle and stuff lmao? would he be an ass and be mean about it or would he allow it because reader is all sad and mopey otherwise 😔🎀 (maybe brat reader? like how would mans handle that in the modern au because in the canon verse pissing him off is a bit too scary) and alsoooo i laughed my ass off when you wrote he would debone coryo like a fish because yuh that twink (he could do bad things to me) wouldn’t stand a chance fr

he would actually make coryo so concerned, like they’re both from well off families (feyd just does underground fighting bc for the #love of the game) but coryo will be like “these poor people are CRAZY.” coryo gives off the vibes of he’d tell someone to kill for him (especially when he gets older, or he wouldn’t get his hands dirty if he does it himself & he’s methodical), feyd is tearing out throats with his teeth. he’d tackle his uncle and start stabbing, he’d gnaw his own arm off just for fun like you can’t compete where you don’t compare tbh. (coryo’s still my bf tho <3)

anyway,

cw: 18+ mdni, typical feyd warnings, spanking/pain play type stuff

modern!feyd would only let you put stickers on his bike if they’re the ones that are like hello kitty holding a gun or something. it’s not like he’s afraid that the softer ones will undermine his masculinity or anything, feyd’s ripping into other men with no real regard for keeping their bodies intact, it’s just that the cutesy stickers go on his helmet. he’ll let you tie a ribbon around his bicep and film videos of him flexing and making it pop off. he would wear matching pjs with you, but he doesn’t want to get blood on them so he sticks to his trusty sweats. he’s the kind of person to wear black in the hot summer sun because he’s spiteful enough to not give a fuck about heatstroke, like it’s something he could fight lmao. gets a matching dear daniel x hello kitty tattoo with you i fear, or a my melody x kuromi one since that’s more your dynamic.

brat!reader with canon era feyd does scare me to death, but with modern!feyd it’s fun to think about…. to a degree. like if you keep it up, he’s pausing the match and dragging you inside the ring to spank you in front of everyone. open palm strikes with half of his strength, if he used all of it your ass might fall off. his rings add even more sting. you learn quickly to know when to pack it up and throw in the towel, because he will NEVER be the one to test out your devious little ideas and macinations out on. he’ll shove a vibrator up your pussy and take you for a long ride on his bike, ignoring the way you try to hump him as he points out the sights he thinks you’d be interest in. weirdly punishes you by fucking nice and slow when you want your shit rocked, he doesn’t even edge you or anything, he just gives it you so soft and sweet and holds your hips down so you can’t try to buck them.

in some ways, you being at his matches has helped his abilities. (you do have to come to his fights btw, if you’re not there expect the rumble of his engine to be heard outside of wherever you’re at. feyd will get his unlce to cancle the match if you’re not there, he’s ultimately a certain kind of performer and if the key audience member isn’t there??? what’s the point.) he has to keep an eye on you, which helps him multitask. he’ll be punching some fuckin’ loser into an unrecognizable pulp while, out of the corner of his eye, making sure that no one’s trying to drag you into any wagers or into their cars. he’s curious if you could cum just from watching one of his fights, from hearing the agonized whimpers of his opponent as feyd effortlessly conquers them. something about you must be sick, because the more ruthless he is in a fight, the higher you’re jumping on him and the more marks you’re sucking into his neck.

you’re so clumsy with it, always putting too much teeth into your hickeys. but that’s just the way he likes it, because you know he’s actively holding back from biting you so hard that’s nearly cannibalizing you. (side note: loves gorey horror, nothing too funny or artsy, he likes shit that cares more about the pure carnage than quips or wide camera shots. hannibal is too “fancy” for him, he always asks you to explain what the fuck they’re talking about.) definition of mauling you like a bear, fucking him is like meeting God if they were an eldritch horror and you were on the brink of death. it is NOT for the weak, his thick arms holding you in a headlock as he pistons his gigantic cock into your cervix. he makes you cum until pass out, then he makes you do it again to wake you up. really good at resetting your brain if you need him too.

modern!feyd who gives you the ultimate scary guard dog priviledge. you’re going about your business in a store and he’s practically vibrating behind you, foaming at the mouth and waiting for some mf to try it with you so he can berserk. but no one ever takes the bait, just one look at his deranged ass and they’re swiftly turning on their heels and high tailing it out of the apple store (you’re taking too long to pick what color imac you want.) copies whatever pictures you saw on pinterest, acting as your little prop. wrapping a tattooed hand around your throat, mirror selfies where he’s holding you over his shoulder by your ass, gross close ups of his long tongue wrapped around yours, insta stories directed at paul specficially bc he won’t stay out of your dms. asks his opponents for date ideas while he’s beating their ass 💀, made his uncle organize a remartch (even though feyd won) with the guy who limped over to your adorably clad in pink form and asked you to get boba (because he noticed feyd giving you your favorite before his fights).

pierced dick, would sharpen his teeth and make his tongue forked. face tattoos + whatever piercing’s more painful. big in body mods overalls like he sees himself as an extension of his motorcycle that he’s always illeggaly modding, fast and furious type specs that no court of law would deem road safe. but he always devotes part of his brain to making sure you’re safe when you ride along with him, reaching behind him and his black painted nails rubbing comforting little circles into your plush thighs. ambidextrous by choice and practice, for sure has a cauliflower ear. whenever you’re sad and pouting, he’s grabbing your chin in between his thumb an pointer finger and lifting your head up so he lovingly teases you about being a crybaby and so he can lick your tears away. (and he doesn’t even do it with sexual intent, feyd’s genuinely just trying to consume your sadness directly since word’s aren’t his strong suit.) could fall asleep in an ice bath, has done it before, dad type snoring like you wouldn’t believe.

loves it when you ride him in any kind of water, you have to pack extra strength sun screen if you’re going to be out in the sun though bc he WILL burn more often than not. still has your pussy gorilla glue gripping his length though, there’s no pain on earth that would put him out of comission & that’s a promise.

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the-moon-files · 6 months

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Linked Universe / GN!Reader - Random Headcanons abt the Chain :)

Part 1 (ur here!) / Part 2 / Part 3

Sun: Gender Neutral! Reader (you/they/them), Guide Reader

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

Stars: First, Sky, Four, Legend

Comets & Meteors: Content: None Known & Triggers: None Known.

U have a lot of Nicknames: Guide, Hero's Guide, Prince, Princey, Star, (more to be added?).

☆

First (Manga!Link):

Has "too good" of posture lol

It makes his back stiff and by the time he's in his bedroll he's confused about why it feels better, silly silly man

Just in general tenses his muscles too often, so whenever u offer to massage him, he nearly crumbles on the spot

(the others know exactly how amazing ur massages are, and are fully staring at him in jealousy lol)

Gets little rips and tears in his clothing all the time somehow??

Even tho he wont have a scratch acc on him after hours of battle???

mans could be flying around Skyloft with only clouds touching him and come back pouting telling you he ripped his scarf again :'(

Likes to be slightly in front of you most of the time, especially in new places/other Links' Hyrules

It just makes him feel better knowing he's both protecting you, and that you're watching his back

(Most Links feel at their best/most confident when your voice can be heard just over their shoulder, not that they don't love seeing ur face now too)

Sky (Skyward Sword Link):

Is slowly making everyone he knows a collection of wooden figurines

He usually carves when he's bored or stressed

so needless to say this mission of the Shadow (slow going, stressful at times like Twi getting hurt)

Has made him give u an army of little wooden figures (everyone else gets a small collection bc ur the first he gives one to)

Did i say give? Excuse me, i meant:

sneaks them as a little surprise into your belongings or clothing or other personal effects

This started bc after a week or two of him giving you wooden things you tried to reroute him to other ppl,

so Sky just made it his mission to see how many he can sneak instead onto you on any given day lmao

(Also he may or may not have daydreamed abt being able to carve u things and actually physically give them to you on his adventure before, so he's taking advantage of being able to now)

Has luscious hair at all times, little to no effort, Wars is so pissed abt it lol

Mf responded when asked what products he used (by poor Wars too) with, "wym?? With water??? And soap????"

Never ties his boot laces

You will all be gearing up for battle and go to stalk and stealth kill monsters and right before u get up on them u always have to look over at Sky's shoes and whisper at him to tie them

Is the most likely to plant face first into the ground or trip and fall on his ass from shoes untying

He just didnt need to with being in the clouds on his Loftwing all the time back on Skyloft and so he never rlly adapted to that even on the surface lol

He's also just miserable at doing a decent knot so you've taken to teaching him repeatedly how to tie them-

why didnt the knight academy help with this at all actually??

(Wind makes fun of him be hes a sailor and knows like 10+ knots)

Four (Four Swords/Minish Cap Link):

Loses his tools constantly

Well not really "lose" so much as "slightly misplace"

It drives him crazy, the Minish used to help him with it back in his Hyrule so he got out of the habit of putting things back where they belong

You've gotten to the point where you'll glance over wherever he's working so the next time he comes up to u complaining abt a lost hammer or smth u immediately just "should be over by the fire"

And ur right, 99.9% of the time its so funny

Bc Four's all like "wtf ive moved around so much since then i took all the other tools with me- MF. U WERE RIGHT."

Is rlly good at like color matching, comes in handy for new outfits

Also has aches and pains like in his hands and arms mostly

Bc of all the forge work, and absolutely treasures any massages u offer him

Likes to wear matching jewelry with you! Like earrings or piercings or necklaces etc

Also has good taste in jewelry and what looks good on everyone + you

Legend (Link to the Past, Link's Awakening etc):

Unfortunately the type of person to just shove things in his bag willy nilly

Its the horder tendencies, he just has a lot of stuffs so he gave up trying to organize it

Actually really good at styling hair, Legend would absolutely lie abt it if u asked but he can spend as much time on his hair as Warrior

Likes to experiment with new clothes, like skirts or bright colors, esp if they match some of his clothes already

U ran by some makeup one time in another Hyrule and he knew how to use it rlly well??

Lies abt random skills he has, or like thinks skills he already has can translate well,

like he's rode a horse before wym he can't drive Wild's motorcycle??

Or fly a Loftwing???

Well now its a challenge

Tbh most competitive over stupid things randomly out of all the Links besides Wild, Wind, Wars, and occasionally Hyrule + Sky + Time

Got challenged to try and go shield surfing with u once and thought that horse-riding skill would transfer and it did in fact Not.

Actually kinda scared the other Links watching u two spin out and crash ngl, what with doing an accidental backflip? Midair??

but u both were okay somehow???

Also weirdly lucky, u stg he's got some sort of ring or blessing for that

☆

IT ACCIDENTALLY POSTED I FUCKING HATE TUMBLR ITS DONE THIS TO ME MULTIPLE TIMES NOW 😭😭

All the Links WOULD HAVE been here if it werent for fucking tumblr

Ill post more parts soon if anyone is interested

Peace out,

🌙

#male reader #botw link x reader #loz link x reader #link x reader #linked universe x reader #lu x reader #lu x male reader #lu x masc reader #lu sky x reader #lu first x reader #lu legend x reader #lu four x reader

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wbswag · 10 days

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Things I want to talk about/touch upon/see people mention more but cannot compile individual coherent posts about:

1. The fact Pops’ daughter apparently had a “falling out” with Pops (over her marriage??) that caused her to completely abandon the yakuza and maybe also cut contact with Pops (the dude is suspicious guys)

2. The fact that in the Overhaul-LOV initial meeting, Chisaki had to have intentionally chosen not to kill Mr. Compress.

3. The idea that many of Chisaki’s thought processes at least partially stem from his time in AFO’s facility. And of course, Pops.

4. How much Chisaki seems to lack a proper reaction to any sort of pain (He was beat to a pulp by Mirio & Midoriya, exploded himself, & got his arms cut off and I’ve never heard him so much as yelp) while still complaining about how overhauling himself hurts?? Yet he doesn’t show it.

5. (Highway scene) How Chisaki only screamed once the realization he wouldn’t be able to ever wake up Pops sunk in (isn’t confirmed but. I’m convinced).

6. The fact that there’s absolutely no way Chisaki wasn’t negatively impacted by being raised in the Yakuza. It’s simply inherent.

7. The blatant disregard Pops had to have had for both Chisaki and Eri’s well-beings to have designated Chisaki as her caretaker.

8. The endless amounts of potential for Chisaki & Dabi/Touya dynamics post-war, platonic or otherwise. (Multiple fics with this premise in my WIPs, lol)

9. The fact Chisaki seems practically incapable of holding a grudge. Like, think about it; is there a character you can say Chisaki genuinely, wholeheartedly hates and wishes the worst upon. You know what—what IS his opinion on Shigaraki/the LOV these days??

10. Realizing that in the initial Overhaul-LOV meeting, Chisaki literally just tone-matched them. Look:

Mr Compress says all that, and then Chisaki later explains:

Which, once you break down what Mr Compress said/how he said it, and what Chisaki said/how he said it… blunt statement of facts. Mr Compress told Toga how faded out the Yakuza have become with no sugarcoating, and Chisaki took that and said. “Well. Yeah.” But then when Chisaki did the same thing (blunt but true & valid criticisms of the LOV/Shigaraki’s leading skills (bc let’s be real, he was an ass leader at the time in terms of actual planning and execution)), the LOV got pissed. He pointed out all the relevant flaws and mistakes in Shigaraki’s leadership and then said it’d be better if he was the leader because he actually has a plan, and they got pissed at the mere prospect of serving under somebody else. Do you realize how much the story would’ve been altered if the LOV didn’t decide to just start attacking Chisaki here?? 💀 Sorry I’m exceptionally passionate about this bc the fandom gaslit me for a while into believing Chisaki was the one starting shit here 😔 but then I read it (a long time after I'd watched it in the anime) and was like. "what. he didn't initiate literally any of this shit. and everything he's saying is true??"

There’s probably more I could add to this but it’s getting long enough lol.

#bnha #chisaki kai #kai chisaki #overhaul #mha #league of villains #shigaraki tomura #dabi #todoroki touya #shimura tenko #rambles #rant #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #shie hassaikai #bnha pops #bnha eri

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year

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WIBTA if I told my dad's girlfriend about his Tinder? He doesn't use it when they're dating, only when they argue.

i (21 NB, closeted as F) currently live alone with my dad (57 M) while I study in college. My dad has been dating this person (52 F) for about 10 years. They met through work and started dating when I was around 12. They say they get along well, but they argue often, and have broken up multiple times in the past. They do not live together because her family dislikes my dad, including his girlfriend's children (20 and 15 year olds). I also have a bad relationship with him. He does provide good quality food, supplies, and shelter, and does favors (according to him) like cooking or not nagging me for staying up late to study.

The reasons I don't like him is because we share next to no political opinions, he constantly engages in toxic behavior such as harassing people over tiktok where he spends most of his free time, and holds really misogynistic opinions, such as that women should not talk to men unless they intend to engage sexually or romantically with them. He is also very racist (which is bad bc part of my family is indigenous!!) homophobic (i am closeted to him, he doesnt even know i had a girlfriend while my mother does), transphobic, and ableist (he has joked about doing harm or killing autistic children I worked with, has called my half-sibling with an ID a black sheep "jokingly", and i suspect i am autistic myself, to top it off).... These all probably sound like valid reasons to hate him. I just state them to be clear that I do have a negative bias. The only reason I don't rebel is because I want to study without many disturbances and,. He is just a pain in the ass and stressful to be around, but not actively harmful. He also denies every claim I make about him when I do call him out, so i have to confirm with my brother or bystanders to know I'm not making these things up)

Ok so. facts: Every time he breaks up with his girlfriend, he vents it all to me while they stay apart for a few weeks because he doesn't have other people to vent to. So, whenever they break up, he installs Tinder, matches with random women (he does not look at their profiles and just accept everything until a match happens), then shows me their photos to make fun of them. He usually does nothing serious about those relationships, except the one time he held a long distance relationship with a woman in a different country for a few months in 2018 and he expected me to advise him on that while the original girlfriend was making efforts for them to get back together.

I have talked to the girlfriend about my own problems with him and she validates them too. She is a sweet woman, but really non-confrontational. She insists that the two of them get along well, that he does respect her and love her a lot when they're together and she does want to be with him long term, but struggles because her children and family really don't like my dad and avoid him when he visits. I really do not think she deserves such a prick and if she doesn't know he uses dating apps when they break up then... I think she should know, so she can choose what to do about him.

I really DO wanna tell her, but I am afraid of the consequences for her and me for snitching, and while I dislike my dad for well established reasons, I do still need to rely on him, which is why i don't intend to give this info away. I guess more than anything I just want validation in disliking him and whether making this move would be too far. I'm willing to wait until graduating next year to pull it off from a safer distance.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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sinnful-darling · 10 months

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how i think levi would handle someone raging and insulting him after he wins a match:

games included: cod + dbd + apex + siege

tws: toxic gamers are a tw of their own, slurs sent by said toxic gamers, levi is called a weaboo and otaku in a degrading way, kys is used (not by levi), rando wishes death on levi’s mom (he doesn’t have a mom), insults sent and received, at the end levi gets a lil toxic bc he’s fed up

COD WARZONE:

levi using proximity chat after having a godly KD ratio: gg guys!

some random person that was on the other team: kill yourself, i bet you hack and camped for that win. i hope your mom fucking dies, you piece of shit.

levi trying not to laugh as he cracks his knuckles: lolololol ur so mad bro. if u got better, maybe u wouldnt have lost. gg tho.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

DEAD BY DAYLIGHT

a survivor that levi hooked post-match: ur a hacker bro imagine not being able to hook survivors without hacking 😂

levi after hooking all of the survivors within five minutes in a dbd match: u mad? lol

the same survivor from before: lmao u fr think i’m mad u hooked me wen ik u hacked tht?

levi laughing his ass off: lolololol u just suck.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

APEX LEGENDS

some rando on the second to last team: worthless cocksucker. you are a waste of oxygen. enjoy your life never amounting to anything but a piece of shit no one likes. do your best to try and piss me off. i make 100k grim a year. work out everyday. and have a girlfriend. worthless fuck.

levi zeroing in on one comment in specific: u want me to degrade u ? lolololololol u a masochist or smth? lolololol

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

TOM CLANCY’S RAINBOW SIX SIEGE

a player levi no-scoped: i bet u hack you piece of shit. u look like i suck dick all day long and never brush ur teeth. i bet u smell like onion and cup ramen u weaboo otaku fuck.

levi fed up with shitty players insulting him: listen here you toe-eyed cabbage, i wasn’t born into this world so your fat ass could choke out low level insults to me. i hope you stub your toe in the dark and have to crawl around your bedroom at 3:47am in horrific pain after going to the kitchen for a midnight snack of cheese and crackers you absolute gormless minger

the player levi no-scoped in siege: sorry

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

some of these i had help with bc i have no idea what toxic gamers say. the last two are from screenshots my friend sent me when he looked it up for me.

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hausofmamadas · 21 days

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Plastic Gangster | Anatoly Givenchy Romanov

(He is modern man but don’t even think about trying to play tickle fuck with him bc he is serious man too)

The Gentleman, Episode 3 - Where’s My Weed At?

∴

So, remember how I actually despised this tiny, angry little mess of a man until I’d lain eye on his alter ego. Well comrades, this is that alter ego.

And what exactly is it about this scene that turned me around so drastically? where literally like if my body were a car, my brain’s grabbing the steering wheel and pistol whipping it, full 180 in the opposite direction as fast as Tam’s pitching that McLaren around the parking lot ?

OHHHH I don't know.... could it be the over-the-top, Boris-and-Natasha, his-and-hers Russian accents? Could it be the fact that they clearly do it against Eddie's explicit instructions? that he prob recited like a drill sergeant in the car no doubt, to avoid another I-just-killed-someone-E-I-E-I-O!!!!! on the way there ORRR could it be the fact that for whatever reason the shit seems to work? bc like somehow it does work, and in a way that Eddie's strategy was super .... not, at least in terms of getting them into the building.

Idk if Mama Mercy was so put off by the accents, she just wanted to get the sale over with, or if she heard the words, "Little Leopard Lady” and/or “FUCK. money” come out of ‘Anatoly's’ mouth, and decided that only someone with more money than God would say some edge-lord shit like that out loud. Whatever it is? It fucking works. Mercy caves. Okay and she was stone-walling tf out of Eddie who's wildly capable of doing pretty much anything and everything else except this. But for Anatoly it’s red carpet, the whole PIA pain-in-the-ass VIP treatment.

And I think the reason this success is so remarkable is bc at this point, the stakes are high, and yet the bar for Freddie is so low, it might as well be the core of the earth. Like he's managed to fuck things up so consistently and with such catastrophic results, if there was a drunk, coke-sniffing, constantly-crying version of the Tasmanian devil, Fredward would be Her, okay. But this is one thing he does correctly, the first thing in the entire show (this is ep 3 of 7, for reference), the first moment when he shows a modicum of value besides being hilarious for reasons that are usually-but-not-always accidental to the scooby gang as it were.

And honestly?? it kinda makes sense that, in this case, he comes thru in a way Eddie can't. Bc what the actual fuck has Fredward Horniman been doing all his life, if not bullshitting bouncers and promoters, charming them enough so they lift up those red, velvet ropes to exclusive (read: pretentious) underground clubs, boxing matches, raves, bath houses, key parties bc no one will convince me he and Tam don't love a good key party once in a while. No one will, it just won't happen like Freddie has CONMAN written all over him, doesn't he? Not necessarily like good? con-man? okay he's no Madoff, right but good enough that he can make you think for a split second, if you really tilt your head and squint your eyes, that this person must be telling the truth.

Bc only someone telling the truth would feel comfortable acting that fucking unbelievable.

Like who would look this woman in the face and say without an ounce of irony, “listen, in my life funny little lady, if you are not safe…. You are DED” I mean the only thing missing is him dragging his finger across his neck, all miming a guillotine. FREDDIE. FREDDIE FUCKING HORNIMAN, THATS WHO.

Beautifultropicalfish Edwina makes the mistake of trying to sell a believable story, a lie grounded in too much reality, when it's clear that the clientele for Mama Mercy prob consists of like eccentric arms-dealers and kooky billionaires ppl with some really sus, really weird, uniquely terrifying ‘hobbies’ that none of us ever want to know about but that will inevitably be the subject of a true-crime doc on HBO someday. Like this woman speaks to the most mind-blowingly ridiculous men on the daily.

And is Eddie over here with his sexy professor cardigan and sexy look-im-such-a-bookworm glasses, rolling up to negotiate on behalf of some white-collar-crime, new-money, C-suite, tech exec with ‘only’ a seven-figure salary, when really he needs to be coming at this with more of that oil tycoon, crimes-against-humanity, Fuck-You-Money energy that Freddie's serving.

Eddie also just can’t seem to suppress the Narc vibes that are seeping from his pores and tbh it’s actually what makes him such a great gangster but not a great con man. Bc Mercy sniffs him out p much every time he speaks, like so👆

Now, it's unclear if Freddie enacts Operation!BorisandNatasha in response to Eddie's evident flailing or if he planned to do it the entire time but either way, you cannot tell me he's not responsible for them being able to get into the chop shop to test drive that car. Bc again, it’s not enough to just walk into this place and act like you belong there. In this case, acting like you belong has to be: giving a ruthless, machete-wielding murderer a cute nickname like “little leopard lady,” claiming that she “laaaavs” when you call her that even tho she seems less than enthused, pitching a fit about wanting something less “poof-poof,” and “more sexier,” and spitting general bars like, “don’t play tickle fuck with me, lady” BC WHO TF SAYS SHIT LIKE THAT UNLESS YOU HAVE MORE MONEY THAN GOD AND HEAVEN AND ALL THE COSMOS

And bc it's not entirely clear whether or not Freddie decided to do this on the fly, I feel liek it’s one of those choose-your-own adventures situations. So I, for one, choose to believe that this was a plan deployed in the face of Eddie's plan not working, and for all of his flaws, Freddie is savvy enough to know how to bullshit someone to get his foot in the door. Bc I firmly believe he can be competent juuuuuuust long enough and lbr probly only long enough to do that.

I mean cmon look at Mercy👇you know she thinks he’s a lil funny

And as if the above display of uncharacteristic competence wasn’t enough, I’m more endeared to Freddie bc of how crazy he is about his wife. And why tf wouldn’t he be when she’s clearly way too cool for him which he seems to be vaguely aware of just casual busting out these moves ripped straight from from stunt choreography of like the fucking Italian Job or something and for like exactly no???????reason????whatsoever?????

Which brings me to the next point bc can we talk for a bajillion yrs about Tamzin is out-of-fucking-nowhere an incredible stunt!driver/renaissance!woman??? and they drop that on us and move on like I'm not asking a bajillion questions like whywhenandhow’d she learn to do this????

Like???? was she once, in her early 20s, engaged to an F1 racecar driver who taught her all the Ways of the Track before he tragically died in an accident, and in her grief, sought solace in a boy named Freddie, whomst she met at a race once, and then later married??? Was she a stunt double who worked on hollywood sets, appearing in some of the most critically lauded, well-known movies, before she settled down and married an aristocrat for his money, a boy named Freddie, whomst she met once at an afterparty, and then despite his lack of wealth bc she was in way too deep at that point and made the fatal mistake of actually falling in love later married??? Is she the long, lost daughter of legendary stunt performer, daredevil himself, Evel Kneivel who taught her everything she needed to know about her birthright before shipping her off to boarding school in the UK when she was just a lass, and then grew up and was charmed by a boy named Freddie, whomst she met when her all-girl’s high school or secondary school whatever tf they call it was paired up with his all-boys high school at a cotillion, and then later married???

I NEED ANSWERS, RICHIE. COUGH UP SOME ANSWERS, MAN. OR DON'T, BUT BRING TAM BACK, WE NEED MORE TAM IN S2, IT'S OFFICIALLY A MANDATE.

taglist: @drabbles-mc, @narcolini, @bellinitini, @ashlingiswriting, @when-did-this-become-difficult, @noctuabunda

#freddie horniman #the gentlemen #the gentlemen 2024 #freddie x tam #the gentlemen netflix #the way i did my own subs #bc i felt the netflix subs were not cartoonishly 'russian' enough skjfdksj #and i still feel like i didn't make them sufficiently cartoon russian to convey the ridiculousness of the accent this man is doing #but it's fine bc it just means you need to go (re)watch the show to get the full effect

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acefiree · 6 months

Text

𝗯𝗮𝘆! 𝗿𝗮𝗽𝗵𝗮𝗲𝗹 | breath mint

Raphael ✷ Grayson ( 16+ ) MASTERLIST

RAMBLES: about to ramble so you can skip this if you want! this is a chapter from my fic I wrote following the timeline of the movies, and since I'm going through and editing the book, I wanted to share some of my favorite parts from the fic on my tumblr, so spoilers??

anyyywhoo I'm also posting chaps that I was going to trash, but instead, I decided to make them into reader inserts and age up the characters. so if you see that and connect the dots, you get a cookie :)

this is about my OC and April meeting the brothers and it will forever be in my heart bc I wrote this when I was sixteen, so there will be major cringe ahead.

also, the characters are their respective age in this to match the movie.

this is not a reader insert! and, keep in mind I WAS A FETUS writing this so my choice of faceclaim was silly and it was like 2017 when I wrote this.

*cough* sabrina carpenter *cough*

TO EXPECT: ocs, 2014! movie, SFW, and a potty mouth character, cringes of my very first fic.

disclaimer: i do NOT own tmnt or the movie scenes, just my ocs and what i write for them :)

I WAS VERY TEMPTED to punch myself in the face for being so damn stupid.

Who in their right mind leaves a flash on when trying to take a discrete photo?

Grayson fucking O'Neil apparently.

All four figures immediately froze, the flash lighting up the dark rooftop for only a second. It was painfully obvious I had taken a picture. My hands began to sweat as my heart started to speed up. I could hear the shadow figures whispering again, and this time I had a really good feeling it wasn't about their previous victory.

"What was that?"

"It's a camera flash."

"We know it's a camera flash."

"Who's behind the camera flash?"

There was a light shove that came from my leg, and I knew it was April probably wondering what was going on. But I didn't dare move.

Maybe if I just pretended that I wasn't here, they wouldn't see me?

"By my calculations, it's two girls,"

Two?! How can he see us both?!

"Now we gotta kill them..."

I nearly let go of the ladder at that, my stomach churning. Shit. Were they really going to kill us over a freaking picture? Who in the hell are these guys? American assassins?

"What?!"

"With kindness!"

"Give them some flowers, earn their trust."

"I got this."

"Raph, no, no, no! She has glasses!"

I had started to climb down now, but it didn't look like I was going anywhere – April was blocking my path.

I had to bite my lip to keep myself from shouting at her. I wondered if a little kick to the face would make her move. I thought about it for a good second, though I refrained from doing so – but damn, did I want to.

I opened my mouth, ready to tell her to move her ass, but a hard heavy chain was suddenly around my midsection. My eyes widened in shock, and I glanced down. "What��" with a harsh jerk and a very loud squeal from my lips, I was suddenly air-born.

My body hit the roof with a harsh thump, and I rolled, somehow shielding my head and camera at the same time. Pain shot up my arm when I landed on my wrist, the limb catching the brunt of my fall. When I finally had control over my own body again, I weakly sat up and clenched my teeth, holding my now throbbing wrist to my chest.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! That fucking hurt you asshole!" I shouted into the dark, my pain causing my temper to flare which controlled my tongue. I swear I could hear a giggle come from the dark.

I didn't give a damn who these guys were, they didn't have to yank me around like that. Unable to stop the aggravated huff that left my lips, I allowed my gaze to drop down to my camera as I checked it over, only to let out a relieved breath when I saw it was perfectly fine.

Yea, but freakin' my wrist isn't.

My eyes drifted back to my wrist as more annoyed grumbles came from my lips. A burning sensation came from my joint as I rotated the limb. I didn't think it was broken, but knew I it was going to bruise. I was so focused on my arm that I didn't notice when April climbed up the ladder and ran over to me. She was quick to notice how I was nursing my arm and she grabbed it tenderly, facing the inner part of my wrist up. She cringed at the flamed skin.

Damn. This was definitely going to start bruising soon. I could already see a red tint forming just below the junction of my thumb that would soon turn purple.

"Are you okay?"

I so badly wanted to snap back a sarcastic remark, but when my gaze locked with hers, my words seemed to leave me. I eased my arm away, staring up at her. I could see the fear in her eyes and that made the situation more real.

I was just pulled through the air like a fucking rag doll, of course I'm not okay!

But I didn't say that.

"I think so—"

A harsh thump, followed by a rough grunt, suddenly came from behind me and a shaky breath slipped through April's lips as she tilted her head back, her eyes growing when her gaze locked onto someone, or something, behind me.

By the look on April's face, I really didn't want to turn to see what made her suddenly go pale. Something in my gut told me not to turn around, to just fall out and play dead – I wanted to ask who was standing there so I didn't have to look.

Then I remembered this asshole was the one that just yanked me from the ladder. It only took two seconds of me mentally preparing myself before I found enough courage to turn around and give this man a piece of my mind on how he shouldn't yank little people around, just so he could feel superior.

I quickly turned, but came to a jerking stop when my nose brushed against a...knee. My eyes crossed as I stared at the limb, and the first thing I noticed was how...green...it was green?

Momentarily forgetting my previous anger and my throbbing wrist, I shuffled back on my butt, my head tilting up to see who the large ass knee belonged to. My eyes bugged like a Looney Tunes character as I assessed the figure towering over me.

Holy fucking shit.

Green eyes clashed with Grey as a man-like turtle glared down at me. I had to blink a few times to make sure I wasn't seeing things. Upon seeing the look on my face, his lips curled back over his teeth into a snarl and I watched as his eyes scanned over my persons for a second, as if looking for something.

I instantly thought of my camera and instinctively grabbed it to my chest. That action had him narrowing his gaze on the device and that's when I knew what he wanted.

There were no words being said as me and my sister sat frozen in our spots. My sister looked about ready to piss herself, while I was trying my best to control my breathing and the pace of my heart. I suddenly felt warm and clammy and my heart was fluttering in an odd rhythm in my chest.

Time seemed non-existent as I took in this creature's appearance, noting the blood-red mask wrapped around the upper part of his head, kind of looking like a du-rag. The red fabric seemed like a good fashion choice, seeing that he had a very pissed-off look on his face at the moment. My gaze swept over the large turtle man, taking in all the gear he was wearing.

There was a thick leather strap stretched across, what I think was, his chest as it disappeared over the lip of his shell. And on his waist was an old-looking strap playing as a belt as it held up his odd-looking pants. My eyes then drifted to his arms, which were literally the size of my head. There was a red band tied around his bicep, stretching as the muscle moved.

This turtle man was ripped, and I honestly wanted to ask what type of steroids he took, because holy shit he was built like a miniature Hulk.

He rumbled lowly, his nostrils flaring as I snapped my eyes back to his own. I could tell he noticed my little observation, and he didn't hide the fact he didn't like it.

"Give me the camera,"

I had to pause at the sound of his voice, my face shifting gradually when I realized he could speak English. His voice was low and raspy like he was a heavy smoker and all his years of smoking finally caught up to him – I don't know what I was expecting the turtle man to sound like, but it definitely wasn't that.

April helped me stand, wrapping her arms around my waist protectively as we stared at him wide-eyed. I could feel her hands shaking against my waist, causing a spark of protectiveness to wash over me. There was a bead of sweat forming on my forehead as my knees wabbled.

"Ooh, look, he's doing his Batman voice," A voice snorted from behind the red-clad turtle, voice lowering to mock him.

"They're so hot, I can feel my shell tightening," A higher-pitched voice strained, prompting me to raise an eyebrow.

Excuse me?

I tried to shift my gaze around the red-clad turtle in front of me, wanting to see who was talking, but his big ass shell was blocking my view.

The red-banded turtle rolled his jaded eyes and turned to look back over his shoulder, or more like his shell. "We can hear you," He growled.

I tensed more as he turned back to us, his eyes locking me again in as he unsheathed something from both sides of his abdomen and I looked down.

Recognition flashed in my gaze as I stared at the familiar fork-like daggers.

So he was the one I saw that night? The shadow man? Holy shit! This is all starting to make sense—

I nearly jerked back when he placed one of the daggers under my chin, his jaw ticking as my breath quickened.

Jesus, what is his problem? My heart started to sporadically flutter faster as a twinge of fear settled in my stomach, afraid he might nick my skin with the sharp object.

He took a small step closer to me, having to slouch over drastically so he could get in my face. I could tell this was his way to intimidate me, and I would be lying if I said it wasn't working. His hot breath tickled my face, causing a light scrunch on my nose to form as I leaned back and tucked my chin toward my chest, promptly showing a double chin.

I was tempted to head-butt this turtle if he got any closer to me. Did this dude know anything about personal space? Because damn, he was so close, if I wanted to, I could boop him on the nose.

All witty remarks seemed to leave me as my brain was still trying to understand what I was seeing. So, panicking, I said the first thing that came to mind.

"Dude, you need a breath mint,"

As soon as the words left my mouth, Red's non-existent brows shot up in shock, as if my words had slapped him in the face. There was a loud boisterous laugh that came from behind him, which had the red turtle quickly recovering from his shock when he realized what I said.

He sharpened his harsh glare down at me, looking somewhat offended. "Wha—why I outta—" He lifted my chin higher with the dagger, "If you don't give me the camera, I'm gonna—"

"You're gonna what? Poke us to death with your little forks? Ooh, I'm shivering." I said before adding, "And by the way, you sound nothing like Batman – if anything, you sound constipated. Don't disrespect Bruce Wayne like that."

I don't know if it was the fall I took, or the amount of cake I ate tonight. But I found myself knocking my uninjured arm against his to move the dagger out of my space. I knew running my mouth was probably going to get me hurt, but this turtle was rude as hell. And that shit wasn't about to fly with me.

I could feel April's eyes glaring at me, most likely wishing I would shut up.

A loud snort came from behind the red turtle again, followed by a frenzy of giggles. If he was mad before, he was defiantly livid now. His face started to change, and if he could blush, I was certain his cheeks would be the color of his mask.

He cracked open his mouth to speak again, but a loud voice cut him off.

"Enough!" I stepped back and watched as another turtle flipped over us, landing on the other side of the rooftop – this one sporting a blue mask.

What's up with the multi-colored masks? Are they color-coded turtles or something? Was I missing the punch line?

My eyes flickered to the two weapons he gripped in his large hands tightly, and I instantly recognized them to be Katana's. He glanced down, his face stern as he assessed the three of us. I suddenly felt really small under his gaze, as if I were a child being scolded.

I watched as he twisted his wrists, expertly spinning his weapons before lifting his arms and sliding them onto the back of his shell, crossing them into a large 'X'.

"Back off, Raph." He ordered, looking over to the turtle in red.

So rude turt has a name? I thought before looking back at Blue.

The red turtle, Raph, let out an aggravated growl as he stepped back and moved away. "I only saw Batman once!—she made fun of my voice and said I needed a mint." He whispered the last part to himself, but I heard him perfectly.

"Ladies, hello. I apologize." The blue-clad turtle said coolly, effortlessly dropping from the edge in one step as he moved in front of us. "My colleague here forgot to say please – so would you please hand over the camera?"

At this point, he was standing but a few feet away. His eyes, which were the brightest blue I had ever seen, glanced down at the camera hanging from my neck before looking back up at my face, his mask shifting as he lifted a non-existent brow. This turtle seemed a lot calmer than the first, but that didn't make me trust him in the slightest.

The scenario good cop, bad cop coming to mind.

I instinctively grasped my sister's hand, tugging her closer to me as I backed away, refusing to give up my beloved camera in fear that they might smash it.

Blue started to take a few steps closer when he noticed us backing away, and I was quick to stop him by throwing my finger in his face. "Ah, Ah! No! You stay."

His face looked rather shocked for a moment at my boldness, and I was surprised when he actually came to a stop. He blinked a few times as if he couldn't believe I just told him to stay put like a dog. I took this as my chance to turn, pulling on April so we could find an escape—

My body jolted to a stop when we came face to face with another turtle – this one in orange.

Holy shit! Are they fucking multiplying?!

April gasped and sprung back, letting me go in the process. My arm flew up out of instinct, not expecting him to be so close. Just before I could make contact and hit him for being in my personal bubble, the Orange-clad turtle was quick to catch me by the wrist, shocking the literal hell out of me.

"Whoa, dudette! chill, it's just a mask. See? Don't freak out—right?" He used his other hand to take off his mask, dangling the fabric in my face with a boyish smile on his face.

One of my brows quirk of its own accord as I tensely glimpse at his massive hand that was wrapped around my small wrist, noting he only has three fucking fingers. He saw the look on my face, a sheepish grin morphing on his lips as he quickly let go.

At the rate my breathing was going, I began to feel a little lightheaded, my heart still fluttering in my chest as my legs became shakier. Oh no. I blinked a few times as the turtle in front of me became blurry. When I blinked again, the red turtle was suddenly standing by the orange one, both watching me with strange looks on their faces as I took a stumbling step back.

Shit, I don't feel good.

"Ray?" April's voice seemed far away, though I knew she was literally right behind me.

Just as I began to collapse, a pair of large hands caught me, and my body went limp.

"Oh, that went well."

"BREATHING STEADY. Blood pressure stabilizing." Someone said as a bright beam shined in my eyes.

My thoughts were jumbled the second I could make out multiple green faces hovering over me.

"Why are we still here playing doctor?" A deeper voice growled, sounding annoyed.

"Because, other than her injured wrist—which you caused—She might have a head injury."

"Uh, correction, she's a hot chick who may have a head injury. Which makes it our civic duty—"

"Would you knock it off."

I jerked away when a green hand was suddenly in my face, three fingers snapping. I blinked a few times as I squinted my eyes at the turtle. He was wearing a pair of goggles and was wearing a purple mask. When he noticed I was conscious enough, he quickly moved out of my space, allowing me to sit up.

"Tink, are you okay?"

I felt instant comfort from the nickname and glanced over to see my sister staring at me with concern, her hand lightly pressed against my knee. I nodded my eyes blinking a few more times as I noticed my vision was still impaired. My hands snap to my face, panic washing over me when I realize my glasses are gone.

The urge to pull a Velma and shout 'My glasses!' hit me as I started to look around for them. Before I could promptly start freaking the hell out, April tapped my shoulder and I felt instant relief when she pulled them out and placed them on my face for me. I gave her a grateful nod, adjusting them before I turned my attention to the four turtles watching us.

I can't believe I passed out.

I twisted my lips, rubbing my hurt wrist while my eyes drifted to each turtle, taking them in as I stood to my feet with the help of my sister.

"What are you?" April asked, also looking at them.

The blue-clad turtle glanced at the others before moving forward slightly. "Well, Miss, uh, we're ninjas." He leaned the top part of his body forward, resting his fist into the palm of his hand and bowing his head at us respectively.

I found myself actually wanting to smile at his actions.

The urge to smile quickly disappeared as soon as the red brute, who I remember being called Raph, spoke up, his eyes set in a hard glare as he stared at us "We're mutants."

The purple one, which I noticed was the tallest out of all of them, looked at us, his goggles gone and replaced with glasses. "Well, technically we're turtles."

"Oh, and we're teenagers! But we can still have...adult conversations." The Orange-clad turtle says, wiggling his fingers and winking at us.

I let out a sound of surprise, gaining their attention. "No, I am a teenager." I gestured to myself with both hands, my eyes wide as I looked back at them incredulously. "Like, honestly, you look like grown-ass men — I mean turtles..."

"You're a teenager?!" The orange banded one whispered in shocked wonder as he approached me, bending and placing his hands on his knees as he got in my face like he was analyzing a rare specimen. I took a step back and gave him a look as he muttered, "But...you're so tiny,"

I made a face at his words, "I'm not that short! I'm a pretty normal height for a girl..."

The purple-wielding turtle let out an amused snort, prompting us to look at him now. "Actually, you seem to be around 5'2 and the normal height for a human female is—"

"Can we please get back on topic guys? We don't have time to share facts and height charts." Blue interrupted us, making me turn to him with a lifted brow.

I promise, I tried to stop my eyes from rolling, I really did, but they had a mind of their own. "Bossy ass," I muttered under my breath.

His eyes snapped to me, and I instantly knew he heard what I said, causing me to shoot him an innocent smile in return.

April, who was still hung up on their existence stepped forward to butt in, "Wait, So, you're—ninja, mutant, turtle, teenagers?" she questioned, sounding slightly ridiculous with how she worded it.

My lips pursed and I shook my head, "That sounds silly—" I glanced at April disappointed, "Why not Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? It has a better ring to it."

"Agreed," The one in purple said, causing me to look back at him with a smile.

I glanced at all of them again, curiosity shining in my eyes as I began to wonder how this even happened. It's not every day you run into humanoid turtles who can speak perfect English. There has to be more to this.

My eyes stopped on Raph, catching the glare he was giving as he watched me look around at them. I lifted a brow, and his expression only grew more annoyed. "They're lookin' at us like we're freaks." He suddenly spat, pointing his fork dagger at me.

Seriously, what is this turtle's malfunction? He seemed to be the only one with a thorn in his side and it was starting to piss me off.

"I bet that's why you took our picture, wasn't it? To show your friends" He accused as he pointed at me again, a smug look mixing with his irritated one. "That is, if ya' have friends."

My mouth dropped in shock at his dig at my social life. Who did this turtle think he was? He was being such an ass, and for what?

"Look here 'Mr.Batman'—" I decreased my voice into a mocking tone, trying to mimic the baritone voice he did earlier, "When it comes to disrespect, I'm usually open-minded, but you've been a real ass tonight, so I'm about to be open-handed and smack the shit outta you!" I sass back before somewhat shouting, "Don't play with me!"

Crickets. There's a distinct pause as all four turtles look comically baffled at my little outburst. They were probably wondering how much damage a small girl like me could do to a six-foot mutant turtle, but I swear if he said another rude ass thing to me, they will all find out.

Suddenly, a very boyish laugh filled the tense atmosphere and I swung my gaze over to the orange-clad turtle, watching as he clutched his stomach from laughing so hard.

"Dudes I think I just fell in love – Raph she just put you in your place bro!"

The red-banded turtle shot the other one a sharp glare, his lip curling as he yanked his intense gaze back in my direction. I took a tiny step back as the hothead dropped down from the ledge he was perched on, his green eyes burning into my own. I noticed his scarred lip quirk into a smirk when he saw me step back. Something in his hand caught my attention, so I looked down and froze upon seeing my camera dangling in his grasp.

"Looking for this?" He taunted, his smirk growing as he observed the shocked expression on my face.

I quickly patted down my body, as if I wasn't looking at my camera. What the hell?! My mouth formed a tight line as he got closer to me, my head having to tilt back so I could stare him directly in the eyes.

Don't show fear, be the bad bitch you know you are.

"I swear, if you break my camera, I'll monkey jump your ass!"

He gave me a challenging look in return, "Bring it, Trouble," His gaze fell from my face and traveled over my body, sizing me up. "I can take ya."

I ignored the nickname as the annoyance I felt grew, "I don't know the anatomy of a mutant turtle, but I'm so close to kicking you in the balls if you don't back the fuck up!" I growled, jabbing a finger in his shell-covered chest.

It's been I while since I've gotten this upset, usually I was chill. But this turtle seemed like he really enjoyed pressing my buttons.

For a moment I could have sworn fear flashed in his eyes when I mentioned kicking him down under. And he seemed to close his stance a little. But before any more words could be shared between us, blue stepped in, moving Raph back.

"How many times do I have to tell you? We don't break things, we fix them. Donnie already wiped the camera, genius – Problem solved, moving on." The blue-clad turtle spoke, his eyes hardening on Raph who now seemed embarrassed by being scolded.

I snapped my head toward the purple turtle, assuming he was the one who messed with my stuff. "You did what?!" My voice squeaked, causing the purple banded turtle to jump and his glasses-covered eyes to round. "Please tell me you didn't wipe everything!"

My whole life was on that damn thing! He better not have erased the memory, I only took one picture!

The purple, Donnie, looked extremely uncomfortable and slightly panicked. He opened his mouth to speak, but the big brute cut him off before he could defend his actions.

"And who put you in charge?" Red rumbled, anger sparking in his green eyes as he turned to face blue.

Now Blue seemed pissed, his chest bumping into Raph's as he matched his aggression. "You know who did." His voice lowers and I find myself taking a small step back.

I had a feeling a fight was about to break out, and I didn't want to be caught in the middle of that.

These guys are really moody.

"Ooh, tension! It's been like thirty whole minutes since you guys had this argument." The orange one butted in with a smile on his face, not seeming fazed by the other turtle's aggressiveness.

"Leonardo, if we want to make it home before Master, we gotta hustle," Donnie spoke up, glancing at his wrist which had a cool-looking watch on it.

For a moment I pause, a sense of familiarity washing over my mind as I thought over that name.

"Leonardo?" I heard April whisper from beside me, causing me to look over at her with a questioning look.

Has she heard of that name before too?

The blue one, Leonardo, turned to me. I kept quiet as he stepped closer and held out my camera for me to take. "Do not say a word about this to anyone," he lowered himself to my height, and even though he was bent over, I still had to look up. "If you do, we will find you." His eyes swayed between me and April for a second, "April and Grayson O'Neil."

He was back to standing his full height; A serious superior look casting in his blue eyes. He turned his head to look at Raph, narrowing his eyes slightly. "We're on the move, Raphael."

"Raphael...?" I murmured this time, my brows pinched together. Where have I heard these damn names before?

A deep rumble followed after I said the name, which caused me to look up. It was Raphael. When we locked eyes, I could see his shoulders tense as he shot me a displeased look. I stared at him for a long moment, trying to read this strange being. He stared back and I could only assume he was doing the same with me.

I could tell he was the most guarded out of the other three, and I was quick to pick up on the fact he seemed insecure about what others thought about his appearance. I would have to remember not to stare if I wanted to stay on his good side. That is, if he even had one.

Like a splash of cold water to the face; Raphael moved away from us, before squaring his shoulders and placing his little bitty weapons back in their holster. He locked eyes with me once more and shot me a pointed glare, the toothpick in his mouth shifting.

Yep, this guy really doesn't like me...Wait, where did the toothpick come from?

"Yeahhh, we'll find you, O'Neil." The orange started doing weird hand gestures as he gradually backed away.

I quirked a brow at how odd and disturbing it sounded.

I jumped a little as he came back quickly, an awkward smile on his face, "I'm sorry, that came across super creepy, okay?" He chuckled nervously, "But we will find you though." He pointed at us, shooting a small wink.

He's weird. I giggled softly.

An award-winning smile broke out on his face as he heard my laugh, looking like a child in a candy shop. He waved me goodbye as he ran after the others who had begun to leave. Leonardo shot him a stern look when he finally caught up, muttering something to him under his breath.

April rushed after them, her phone now out and raised to snap more pictures as they disappeared into the night.

I rolled my eyes before joining her at the edge of the building, smirking to myself.

"It was like fire brah, did you see me back there? She's totally into me, I made her laugh!"

"Shut it, Mikey." I recognized that voice to be Raphaels.

I glanced over at April, my smile spreading somewhat in excitement.

I knew after tonight, that neither of our lives were ever going to be the same.

MASTERLIST

#bayverse tmnt #fanfic writing #bayverse raphael #teenage mutant ninja turtles #bayverse leo #bayverse donnie #bayverse mikey #tmnt bayverse #bayverse raph

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runawaymun · 1 month

Note

All your fic idea sound delightful but I’m very curious about the Magician Nephew x LOTR crossover and the Another MGME but it's just my OCs from my historical fiction novel!

Ask me about my not-yet-written-fics from this list

Okay, so:

,Magician's Nephew x LOTR crossover

It's so easy to make this work.

Jill and Diggory have magic rings that transport them to the wood between worlds. In theory, the wood contains portals to every world that has ever existed, or ever will exist, right?

So the events of the magician's nephew happen. They wake Jadis, get chased by her all the way back to the wood, and then they run for the nearest pool. And rather than it being home they run for the one that happens to be Middle Earth.

Jadis still grabs onto Digg's ankle.

(Debating on whether or not to include uncle andrew. It does involve them having to go back to England in between their trip to the dying world, and then for some reason back to the wood. Maybe the whole lampost situation happens still idk. I do just love the idea of Jadis and Uncle Andrew traipsing through Middle Earth).

I have not fully decided which age to put them in but there IS something immensely funny about Diggory and Jill wandering around Middle Earth with some magic rings.

And also for some reason Diggory and Jill end up with one ring color, and Jadis (and also potentially Uncle Andrew) wind up with the other ring color, and/or there just aren't enough rings and somebody ends up with all the green ones).

They wind up separated and traipsing around looking for each other and/or trying to separate Uncle Andrew and Jadis. I think it's best if maybe Uncle Andrew and Jadis have the green rings, but aren't willing to leave without also having the yellow ones.

Jill and Diggs wind up in Rivendell (obviously I MUST include Elrond) and give everyone a heart attack because they have a funny little yellow ring that absolutely rubs Vilya the wrong way and doesn't match any Music in middle earth. Meanwhile apparently according to them there are Some Very Dangerous People wandering around with another set of weird magic rings.

I want Jadis to decide that she absolutely wants to be queen of Middle Earth and to try very hard to launch a campaign for it.

Also want Jadis to find out that there are other magical objects and to try and collect them all like Pokemon, and to be a royal pain in EVERYONE'S (including Sauron's) ass.

Anyway that's it that's the idea.

MGME But It's Just My OCs From My Hisfic Novel

okay to make this make sense you gotta understand that within the actual history post the book I wrote, two of the main characters get killed.

(the book is set during the very last year of the nine years' war in Ireland, where Hugh O'Neill, High King of Ireland and Chieftain of Ulster fought against the colonizing English army. He had convinced Spain to help him (Catholics vs Protestants), but the Spanish pulled out and Baron Mountjoy (British occupation) essential starved the Irish out by burning all their crops, and eventually Hugh signed a treaty after one final stand in Ulster. Baron Mountjoy smashed the stone of kings, where all the High Kings of Ireland had been crowned for thousands of years, and formally began the occupation, moving British colonizers in to take over the farmland in Ulster and press the Irish into serfdom.

ANYWAY. So that's the background. Later Hugh and his ally Rory O'Donnell go to Spain to try and muster up some more help, but they wind up actually getting sick and dying during the trip.

So my OCs are Hugh's wife and daughter. (Hugh was, historically, a terrible husband and I am an absolute slut for messy toxic dynamics). The OC winds up with Rory in the end bc he was historically a Really Cool Guy.

So naturally, instead of them dying later I'm like 'haha what if they just got transported to Middle Earth'.

I have not thought this through very hard but I would obviously like the Classic 'they wind up in Rivendell' because again, Elrond, obviously obviously.

Mostly SOL but I could also see Rory and Hugh going "oh, there's another colonizer who wants to destroy the free people of THIS land??? Fuck him. We're absolutely joining that fight."

I could see this being set in the second age actually during the first founding of Rivendell (and so Rory and Hugh and up in TLA) but I could also see them at Pelennor in the TA, but unfortunately that means that my OC mom doesn't get to meet Cel :( And I want them to be friends. They would get along so well.

Elrond, of course, parents both OCs (even though one of them is a grown ass mom) because I want him to. Also he hisses at Hugh. Because he's trash.

Alternatively they could wind up sometime in the early third age and join the war against Angmar and then we still get Cel. I'm not picky.

This one is more vague and I mostly daydream about SOL situations of my OCs in Rivendell but there's definitely A Plot in there somewhere.

#not yet written fics ask game #the hisfic novel #the magician's nephew #thank you!!!!!

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streaminn · 11 months

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I'm back with some more songs to share. Totally unexpected isn't it? Guts by Thomston feels like it fits with the hermit enid au. I can't really think too much about it because it makes me sad that enid is all alone and while I love my favorites suffering, she already has enough emotional pain with her neglectful/emotionally abusive family. Enid needs to go through physical pain instead but not more abuse from her so called family. So the lyrics that I think match up are

"I wish I had the guts to walk away

The thought of you alone makes me afraid

You push me to my limit

You are always forgiven

I cut you off

And tie us back"

Somewhere In My Past by Divo Bayer is a pretty romantic one that would fit the pjo au. With this more fluffy version of the au, is enid still the reincarnation of the farmer girl who went off to war and wednesday fell for? If so, then it works out from either perspective. Like from Wednesday, she's aware that this is her soul mate that she's been waiting for and still remembers their time together. From enid, I think it would be her having a vague feeling of deja vu about wednesday despite never actually meeting her before. It's like an itch at the back of her mind where she swears she knows this person

"I met you just tonight

But I keep wondering why

It seems I've always known you all my life

I held you only once

But I keep wondering why

It seems I've held you forever"

I could keep adding what fits but then I would put the whole song.

Then there's Treading Water by Ta-ku and Wafia. It's a duet and they both sing in each verse it's kind of like a push and pull thing where the male singer is trying to save their relationship where the woman is thinking that she's just going to inevitably hurt her partner. I'm thinking maybe the demon baby au specifically when belle is killing enid and wednesday leaves to save her. Though I'm not sure the song fits any au in that it would cause problems or a rift to come between them. It would be more like oh this is something we need to work on together to overcome and strengthen our relationship. We know enid is important to wednesday so it's like she's trying to avoid getting too close so she doesn't hurt enid.

"It's like you never let me past skin deep

Don't trip up on the mess I always leave

I'm trying to make the best of what we've been

I'm no good for you I'm good for you"

You kinda need to listen to the song to get what I mean about the push and pull thing. It's a conversation. Not sure if I explained it right but I tried. Sorry if it's too long an ask and if you get tired of my song recommendations please let me know and I'll stop. Have a nice day.

for the pjo au yes!! enid is still very much the reincarnation of the farmer girl who gave wednesday her name

i can't say much unfortunately bc my ass is so no thoughts head empty rn 😥im sorry mate but im sure the songs are amazing like always

#song thoughts #au thoughts

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hananoami · 2 months

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[03/24] Deepspace Trials Progression

A little late to post, but I've successfully clear all three directional orbit stage 70s, unlocking their personal title soles Xavier's [Sands of Time], Zayne's [Dream's Finale], and Rafayel's [Scarlet Thorns]! Additional rewards for clearing the directional orbit - stage 70 are the following: 40 diamonds + 1 Empyrean Wish + 4000 gold. This stage did not have an achievement locked behind it, so no achievement points were gained from successfully clearing these stages.

Sundays are the best days for deepspace trial progression because all three directional orbits are available. I generally try to keep a record of the stages I've done that gave me difficulty to clear in case others might find my experience insightful for their own attempts. I apologize if my explanations are a bit confusing! Most of my notes are me rambling, but my inbox is always available if there are any questions. Feel free to leave a comment and I will try my best to help any way I can.

𝚇𝙰𝚅𝙸𝙴𝚁 (3/3) stage 73 to 75

stage 73

was such a pain in the ass trying to kill those frenzy mobs fast enough in order to get the dmg buff. you'll have to do it do it 3 times throughout the fight, with each round getting progressively more challenging. 1st round had 2 mobs with 3HP bars no shields + 1 frenzy mob 3hp no shield. round 2 had 1 tanky af wanderer with 3HP bars + 2 shields; then another tanky af frenzied wanderer with 3HP no shield. last round had the final 'boss' with 4HP bars + 4 shields. the frenzy wanderer had 3HP no shield. was there a stellactrum? idr, but i dont think there was? anyway, my advice for this stage is to group up the wanderers as close together so you can use [Active Skill] on cool down to burst damage faster. use [Resonance Skill] to break down wanderers with shields, and once those shields are broken use [Active Skill] to deal a burst of damage to a weakened wanderer. the targeting system in his game isn't the best. to avoid hitting a different wanderer i usually try to face the frenzy wanderer, standing as close as possible to focus target it in order to center all damage around that specific one. if defeated within the time limit you should get a notification about receiving an active damage buff. MC also emits a red glow.

stage 74

nothing worth noting. just go in and do some big deeps!

stage 75

the game sets x0 and x5 stages as more challenging than the others. this was pretty easy imo. 4 wanderers spawn at once with 3HP bars + 2 shields each. group them up, break shields, and burst damage them down.

𝚉𝙰𝚈𝙽𝙴 (1/3) stage 77 to 80

stage 77

nothing worth noting. just go in and do some big deeps!

stage 78

required 4 ruby and 1 pearl for protofield stellactrum bonus. i don't have [Neon Night] for the NT pair, but i do have his HC pair from the [Heartfelt] series. this stage was to stand near the sensor until it reached 100%!

stage 79

this also required 4 ruby and 1 pearl for protofield stellactrum bonus. was a kill all wanderers type of stage - 2 rounds. each had 2 wanderers with 3HP bars + 2 shields and 2 monsters with 3HP bars. it helped to group them all together in order to do AOE dmg. would recommend matching the stellactrum for the bonus bc it really helped here to break down their shields -- even if the memories are low leveled!

𝚁𝙰𝙵𝙰𝚈𝙴𝙻 (3/3) stage 70 to 73

Successfully cleared his directional orbit: fire stage 70! I do not have a clear vod for this fight, but I can provide screenshots of my team set up and their attributes.

Team 1 required 4 pearl + 1 ruby to match the protofield stellactrum. there were 5 mobs with 3 HP bars + 2 shields. using his [Resonance Skill] to group up the mobs really helped. blessed to have his myth cards.

Team 2 required 4 violet + 2 amber to match the protofield stellactrum. ngl i had so much trouble with this one. in my case it was more of a skill difference than a stat issue. what worked for me was to save my [Resonance Skill] to spam on cooldown and only use the [Active Skill] when the shields were completely broken for maximum dmg. also remembering to pick up his beacon when it drops [Passive Skill] with charged attacks and being able to move out of dmg areas/dodge in time to gain their [Support Skill] really helps.

#love and deepspace #deepspace trials #;orbit prog notes #;not me rambling into the void #;sakura snapshots #;achievement notes #;affinity notes

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stackslip · 5 months

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thematically, cody being the one who takes out roman at mania works for me–they're kind of two sides of the same coin. both sons of prestigious wrestling families, in a business obsessed with blood and has weird eugenics ideas about how being from x family or race makes you "good" at wrestling. both came to wwe early, but their paths diverged dramatically. cody was unhappy with his wwe booking and left, rebuilt himself from the bottom up, honed his skills in many different rings and helped start up wwe's largest rival before returning to an adoring crowd that would kill for his any word, following his dad in the all american everyman charmer role! roman was made face of wwe long before he had the experience or ability to really thrive in that role, and he had tremendous growing pains. the crowd hated him and no matter how much he busted his ass off, he was also handed these matches on a platter and nobody would let him forget it. but he also suffered immense personal tragedies that would be mocked by the audience, and finally he turned heel–having finally not only grown into that role but seized it and squeezed it. his character is desperate to be seen and acknowledged and loved, and now he is finally seen but nobody will love him. he's defined by his family–the storyline around his family–people who leave him one by one as he chokes them out with his abuse and desperation to be the center of their lives! cody built himself up, but he also just walked into wwe and the crowd immediately cheered him to the heavens! roman could never get it–his first real cheers were as a heel, and now they want him gone! cody helped jey and sami escape roman and continued rocking during raw, while roman is falling apart and growing more and more bitter and resentful and anxious. i kinda hope cody doesnt keep the title long tbh, or that he turns heel after mania, bc rn he only works to me bc roman exists as his foil within the company. the all american gimmick bores me to death, but the tragedy of two wrestling sons failed by their families and obsessed with capturing a legacy that has harmed both of them–that works for me!

#eli talks #wrestling #the polycule of roman's exes #bloodline wwe

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goblins-riddles-or-frocks · 2 years

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Hellsing Rewatch: Episode One Thoughts

Integra rolling up to Cheddar like “vampires are real, anyway I’m in charge now. fuck off :) ”

Does Alucard get any enrichment beyond walking around on his way to kill vampires? Integra needs to put his blood bags in a little puzzle box or something. Maybe give him a few chew toys. Gotta take care of your Dracula!

Thinking about the HC that Alucard’s organs are like. rotted. from the bit we see when he gets shot to ribbons.

“I had to shoot through you to pierce his heart”

Forever salty that the OVA doesn’t bother to include the brief time passing in universe where Seras gets acclimated to being in Hellsing and trained for a short while. In this they just drag her out of bed.

“And now I’m hearing voices, like some kind of telepathy.” Voices? Plural?? (according to @iscariot-feels Alucard likes to do impressions 😭)

WHY does the first episode have so many of the Gonzo-esque hissing sound effects? Who invited Gonzo here!

Forever wondering what the fuck the building is in Badrick that they’re fighting in. It’s fucking huge. Is it a hospital?? I think that’s the consensus

Why do the ghouls always have guns? Who is arming them? How do they even have the intelligence to aim and fire them?

ALWAYS drawing attention to Anderson throwing his bayonets down the stairs, around a corner, and THROUGH THE FLOOR

Just picturing Alucard telling Integra about Anderson in painstaking detail. Like “omg I met the hottest guy today 🥹” And then going on to give the same description to Walter bc of the Jackal having the exact same details as his glove

The way Anderson ALSO plays dead after Alucard shoots him in the head. Match made in hell 💖

Love the shot of the bats receding over a bloody moon right after Anderson attacks Alucard again. Does that mean his power’s waning? Were the bat familiars just like “fuck this shit, we want none of it” ???

Also really interesting that we do sometimes see Alucard with a pained expression when he’s wounded.

LMAO we get another bat shot right after Anderson decapitates him. They’re legit like “fuck this, fuck this BYE”

Again on my salt train about the Seras running from Anderson sequence not harkening back to Integra running from Richard at all. Because in the manga it really is similar!

“This is no time to lose your head, Police Girl” says the decapitated head :/

And of course then there’s the blood essay. This dramatic ass motherfucker. And again he doesn’t tell her that Anderson is right behind her.

“That girl belongs to me”

Anderson pinning down Integra. Leave room for jesus, sir.

“Maybe it was just a whim, but that doesn’t sound like me.” BITCH EVERYTHING YOU DO IS ON A WHIM

I FORGOT we get a glimpse of girlycard in the first episode’s credits

#hellsing #hellsing ultimate #i ramble sometimes #keeping it all in one post so I don’t spam the tag again 😅

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sardonic-sprite · 11 months

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Y'ALL I FEEL LIKE I'VE CRACKED A CODE

Ok ok ok so maybe I'm just dumb for not processing this before but let me celebrate and explain because I've never felt this excited about like "planning" shit before.

Ok SO everyone has heard of character arcs, right? And I think most people understand that the arc and growth of the main character is directly tied to the plot beats of the story and vice versa, yes?

Now here’s the thing, bc for me, it just like... it wasn't clicking, this whole thing about "lies" and "misbeliefs" and "aha moments" and just how they interrelate. Honestly, now that I finally get it I really don't know how I was so confused or why I'm so excited now, but I still am excited so I'm continuing on and hoping maybe this helps someone.

But anyway, what FINALLY clicked and what literally slingshotted me into figuring out my character arc (the literal most frustrating thing holding me back lately) was that character arc and showing growth connects to plot and moving the story in your character's attitude about what they're doing.

Let me explain.

There are a couple of points in the story where your MC makes a huge, plot-driving decision. These points are roughly Accepting the Call to Adventure, the Midpoint, and the Aha Moment. Now, I was getting messed up how these differed and how they related to the character arc, until I realized it's about the attitude.

Take your protagonist at the very opening of your story. They're going about their daily life. Here comes the Call to Adventure. They probably don't want to do it at first, do they? So then Something Happens and they decide they really don't have a choice, apparently. So they Accept the Call and begin the quest or training for the death battle or whatever. They go along until BOOM Something Else Happens, something that makes the quest or the death match personal. (This is the Midpoint) Now they're the one driving the car, that Something that Happened at the beginning no longer matters, they will finish the quest or battle now even without that motivation. Except... they fail. Miserably. Fall flat on their fucking face. And probably the villain is laughing. So your hero despairs. What went wrong? They had every reason to succeed, the motivation, the training... and then comes the Aha Moment. MC realizes that they were going about the quest or the battle all wrong. And why is that? Well because of the misbelief they've had since before the story began! They realize that that’s what was wrong the whole time, say "AHA!" and pick themselves up because now they know the right way to fight the battle or right path to take on their quest, and this time they succeed. The bad guy falls, everyone is happy, the end.

That's like every story ever, right? Close enough anyway. But that pesky misbelief isn't corrected until the very very end so why the fuck was your character doong anything close to right before then?

Because it was not the motivation holding them back it was the misbelief, the methodology.

Here's an example.

Let's take Big Hero 6. For now we're going to gloss past the mini arc where Tadashi takes Hiro from botfighter to engineer and start after the fire. Hiro is living his life, day to day, and it is absolutely miserable. He is totally lost in his grief, he believes there's no end to this pain.

Something Happens. Baymax wakes up and finds the lone microbot, follows it, and they discover the microbot factory and the Masked Man. Now the game has changed. Hiro really does not have a choice, he has to Do Something.

So what does he Do? Goes to the police, and that's useless. So he takes a little more initiative and sets up Baymax's first suit, going to investigate again. But he's half-assing stuff.

Now More Stuff Happens. Masked Man attacks Hiro personally, as well as his friends, and tries to kill them. They also think they realize who he is, and that it must now be TRUE that MM set the fire and indirectly killed Tadashi. It's. Fucking. Personal. Hiro WANTS to take this guy down.

So with actual fervor they track MM to the island, confront him, and... fail. Because. Well a lot of reasons, but we're talking about character arcs rn so essentially the crucial reason they fail is because Hiro wanted to take revenge, to cause more pain. The others weren't ok with that, so MM/Calahagn gets away and Hiro and Baymax fly off alone. Here is your angsty "darkest moment" scene. And then, right on its heels and facilitated by Baymax and Tadashi, is the Aha Moment. Hiro comes to realize that he failed not because he wasn't skilled or wasn't motivated, but because he was going about it wrong. His methods were off. He was acting under the belief that pain doesn't stop. But now he can see that yes, it can, healing can happen, you can get better. So he makes a new plan, a plan acting on the new belief, the truth, that people can heal and lessen pain, and this time he succeeds because he fixed his method by correcting his misbelief.

That was a lot, but you see how Hiro's growth is shown not just by his actions, but by his attitude surrounding those actions. For him and for almost every hero, there's a journey that goes from

I'm living my life and I will do nothing (at the beginning)

To Something Happened and I must do something (accepting the call)

To Something Else Happened and now it's personal, so I want to do this thing (midpoint)

To Oh my God I Was Doing it Wrong, now I'm going to Do It Right (aha)

I guess basically what I'm saying is that your character's MOTIVATION to Do The Thing can be and often is very different from the character's ATTITUDE about doing the thing. And either one can make for a compelling character arc.

Hopefully some amount of that made kind of sense. I mentally said it far better in the shower lmao, but this was a huge Aha Moment for me so I wanted to share it in hopes that maybe it helps some you.

#sprite said #sprite's novel #original writing #writing #character arcs #plot points #how they relate #motivation vs attitude #why is your character doing the thing #and how does your character feel about doing the thing #are both cool #idek what im saying anymore #but it still makes sense in my head #words

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