#im going to write fanfic that is so indulgent | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stillsimpinforfanfiction · 2 years

Text

What can be Cradled but Never Held? Chapter 1

Paul Dano!Riddler x f!Reader NSFW Slowburn

18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Word Count: 3882

Warnings (not all in this chapter): Umm tbh everything at one point or another, this is Riddler we're talking about. Assault, murder/death, blood, harassment and sexual assault attempt (not by Eddie), abuse mention, neglect mention, sex/masturbation, mental illness (I'll try to depict this as well as I can), weapons, torture, kidnapping, BDSM themes, and more! lol

Summary: After meeting the girl of his dreams, Eddie is confounded in his new feelings. When he is supposed to be focusing on his Riddler agenda, as he had planned for the last two years, but finds himself thinking about you day and night instead, what will he do? Should he let you go and move on, force you to stay with him and learn to accept him as the Riddler, or stop his plans altogether?

A/N: Hey guys, I've been working on this one for a while, and have quite a few chapters ready already. Idk when I'll post them though since I may go back and tweak things depending on how the plot progresses. Also, I've never seen/read any other batman besides the newest one and was just obsessed with Dano's Riddler. So, I apologize if this isn't entirely canon, especially since I imagine I will have to write after the events of the first movie before the sequel is out. Any tips (good or bad) would be great. Thank you!

Despite loving your old town, getting to see your best friend in-person every day, and having a good connection with many of the locals, you decided that taking up a job in the city Gotham a few hours away would be good for you. The "good" parts, of course, being that it paid about 1.5 times the amount your last job did, and you had secured a decent apartment with lower than average rent. So even though you would be leaving behind your old life in a way, you could still talk to your friend online and visit every now and then, especially with the bank you were about to be pulling in.

You took up a position as a clinical lab tech at a prestigious animal hospital in the city. The job had its perks as you occasionally got to see cute animals going by and knew that your work was going to a great cause: saving animals. I mean, what could be controversial about that? The best part, though, was getting to work in a lab where no direct customer consultation was usually required as it was done through the veterinarians. I.e, you didn't have to deal with customer service drama. Everything seemed to fit into place almost too perfectly and you moved to Gotham with a naive but optimistic view about starting your new life.

The first few weeks were nerve-wracking but exciting. Getting used to your new job was difficult, and finding places for everything to fit in your apartment was as easy as a blood cell trying to flow through a blocked artery, but you managed, for now. After finally having being moved in all the way and having a good handle on your job, you decided to explore the city, albeit not venturing very far the first time.

After work one night, you walked to a nearby cafe, about 5 blocks from your apartment, to get something not hand-cooked by you for once. As you walk in, you can tell the diner is much larger than can be seen from the front window and had a retro-urban vibe to it that felt very comforting. Considering it was as late as it was, the only other patron was a man sitting at the bar with his head in a book and illuminated by one of the few dim lights left on.

As you drew closer, you could hear some faint sounds coming from the back, indicating that the place was definitely still open and you didn't just enter into a closed restaurant accidentally. Still a little wary, you decide to sit a few seats away from the man, but still at the bar in the best position for a waiter to hopefully notice you and get your order soon.

Trying not to look awkward, you scroll through your phone absentmindedly but definitely see in your peripheral vision the man sneaking glances at you over the top of his book. One time he glanced, you look up at him and smile which makes him immediately look back at his book with tinted red cheeks. Cute, you thought.

"Do you have any suggestions on what tastes good here?" you ask, setting your phone down on the counter to give a more direct presence.

"Oh, um....I really like their pumpkin pie" he stammers out sheepishly. You nod, giving your thanks and letting him get back to reading.

After a few minutes, a waitress finally notices you and scrambles out, apologizing for not hearing you come in and asks for your order.

"Oh, it's okay, I just got here! And could I get a burger, fries, coke, and....a slice of pumpkin pie?" you smile to the man at the last part. The waitress smiles and heads to the back as you give your thanks and go back to reading whatever smut you had pulled up on your phone.

After a few minutes, the waitress sets down your food and you thank her. Deciding to pay then, you try not to become feral when you finally can gobble the food down from your hunger. You're about halfway through your meal when you glance to the man again, this time focusing on the book he's reading.

"Is that Into the Wild?" you ask enthusiastically, although rhetorically since you would recognize the cover anywhere.

"Ah, um, yes...you know it?" The man peers surprisedly at you through his clear-rimmed glasses.

"Yes- I mean- well, it's one of my favorites. Jon Krakauer is...an incredible writer. Is this your first time reading it?" You blurt out, a little too excited at the opportunity to share your passion for the book.

"It is. I've never read from him before, although I have to agree this is an incredible story so far. Especially knowing it's true." He exclaimed, his knee slightly bobbing on the footrest of the bar stool.

"I know right!? It makes it so much more thrilling knowing that you really can just...slip away from society. Makes you wonder why we decided to make this corporate world at all huh..." trailing off, you go back to eating the rest of your food, finally starting on the slice of pie.

The man hadn't responded to you after that, but you could feel his stare on you like a hawk the whole time. In normal circumstances, it would be creepy, but for some reason, you didn't feel like it was with him, more just that he struggled with social cues, which hey, you could definitely relate to that. After the first bite, you closed your eyes from how good the pie tasted, savoring the flavor before swallowing and looking at him again.

"You were right, this really is good, wow" you beamed at him. He smiled back shyly and attempted to push down a cowlick in the middle of his head to clear the air.

"I'm y/n by the way, what is your name?" you pushed further, leaning your head on your hand and tilting it as you stared back.

"It's-uh...it's Edward" he paused long before telling you, almost like he was deciding whether to say it or not.

"Well it's nice to meet you, Edward. You'll have to let me know how you like the book if we happen to see each other again."

"Yeah that...that sounds good" he smiles again, watching you grab your things and head back out into the night.

Little did you know, that interaction would completely change both of your lives forever.

It had been a few days since that night and work was starting to take its toll on you already. The higher pay wasn't just due to the prestigious level the animal hospital operated at, you discovered, it also came with many more duties than your previous job where you shared much more of the work. There were more tests that the lab ran compared to others within hundreds of miles, and that meant that you had to deal with tests being shipped and people travelling with their pets from all over. You also had to learn how to operate the new machines that were capable of such tests and interpret the data intervals for each kind, and so on. In other words, every time it seemed like you were getting used to your job, you found out something you were doing wrong.

Trying to relieve your pent-up stress, you took to driving before heading home after work. Both to explore the city more and to clear your head before getting into your comfort mode; you didn't want to bring that negative energy home. You had found quite a few odd but interesting places you planned to check out on the weekends, but your favorite spot was actually out of the city up a large hill to a long-forgotten park. Whilst kind of creepy at night, it had an amazing view that overlooked the city and reminded you much more of your old rural town, being able to hear crickets and see the stars rather than honking and air pollution. At some point, coming to this spot became ritual for you after work and you would destress in the cool breeze.

This night, however, the park didn't seem to be cutting it after a particularly bad day at work. See, your manager had gotten switched with one from another lab within the hospital and the new manager was...forward, to put it nicely. From the get-go, he had asked you in private if you had a boyfriend, to which you of course lied and said yes. This did little to dissuade him, however, and he had still taken to you in a way that was entirely unprofessional.

At one point, while preparing a specimen, he came up behind you and grabbed your hands, using his fingers to show you how to prepare it in a way you were quite literally already doing before his unwelcome presence. After declaring that you would prefer vocal instruction to physical in the future, he just laughed at you dismissively and continued his provocations.

Every time another lab tech or delivery person came in, he of course completely stopped his actions and put on the most charismatic persona equivalent to a devious politician. It ground your gears, knowing damn well that he had plenty of other work he should have been doing rather than bothering you.

Sighing, you tried to let the negative stress go but found it unbearably difficult and decided some food would help. Returning to the same diner you met Edward at, you were surprised to see it packed much more than last time, with about half the booths filled and only a few seats left at the bar. It was a Friday night, you supposed.

Despite your previous defeated thoughts, you perked up a bit at seeing Edward in the same spot he was before, with an open stool next to him. This time, however, he had a computer on his lap rather than a book, which he was currently typing away at almost in a frenzy.

You sit at the stool next to him, waiting to see if he notices you and smiling down at whatever it was he was so preoccupied with. You could only get a slight view with the now-glaring dining lights reflecting off the screen, but it looked like some sort of coding.

"Hey Edward! It's y/n, do you remember me? How have you been?" you ask, hoping you aren't bothering him too much.

"Yeah, I do. I've been fine" he forces out, not even looking up from the furious typing he quickly resumed with.

"That's good! Well did you end up finishing the book? I'd love to know what you thought of it" you try harder, hoping your first, much more friendly, encounter with him wasn't abnormal behavior for him.

"I did. Look, I'm not trying to be rude but I'm just really busy right now" he finally looks up at you, clearly annoyed with having to stop whatever he was working on twice now.

"Oh, okay, sorry" you mutter, feeling humiliated. Opting for a booth far from the bar instead, you head over and spend the rest of your time there looking out the window as you eat, feeling even more down than when you walked in.

The next time you enter the diner, you feel extraordinarily depressed, even compared to last time, and are solely going because you didn't have the motivation to cook. This time, the diner is mostly empty with only a few patrons in now, and, of course, Edward in his normal seat. You head for the same booth as last time and, after ordering, put your head down to cry silently despite telling yourself you wouldn't do so in public.

Edward obviously noticed this and felt his heart drop for some reason, which he knew was silly. The last time you had been here, he had been dealing with covering up some of the traces that he left when getting intel for his Riddler plan. Normally, he would do this from the safety of his own home, but, by the gift of Hades himself, his apartment's internet had decided to go out and his hotspot wasn't working. Thus, his best solution at the time was to just use a VPN and go to the closest place with free wifi: here.

Of all the days for him to get to see you again, of course, this was the day it happened to work out. His frustration with everything going on at work, the internet issue, and having to cover up his mistakes in the first place, made him quite agitated already. So when you innocently tried striking up a conversation with him like when you met, he regrettably took out the stress on you more than he meant to, instantly feeling terrible at your dejected expression and decision to leave.

As atrocious as it was, he took that opportunity to hack your own phone that night, once his own work was finished. It was easy, since you didn't have a vpn on and were the last to connect to the wifi. He didn't want to be too invasive, though, so he decided to simply find out your name and do a background check anyone could do, rather than snooping through your photos or messages like a total creep.

From this, he had found your previous work history, family, and university which all seemed pretty normal. You also didn't have any social media accounts, at least, none tied to your name, which he was surprised by. Really, all he could find on his "normal and not at all creepy" background search was a few newspaper mentions of you with honor roll, awards, etc. However, he decided to look a little deeper, just out of curiosity as to what you were suddenly doing in Gotham, and found that you worked for Tariel Animal Clinics, a corporation that he had the unfortunate experience with digging into, as they were infamous for money laundering off the ingenuine business of some of their patrons.

This immediately sent a red flag through his brain, completely disheartened that you, who seemed so sweet and rejecting of society, based on the little he had talked to you anyway, could be involved with this dark scheme. He couldn't say he was surprised, of course, considering this was Gotham, but it still sucked.

He thought about it, your background, the fact that this job was so similar to your last one, and wondered, did you know? Maybe you were just a naive outsider not prepared for the horrors of this city and not aware of the evil corporation you were working for.

Regardless of the self-preserving voice in his head telling him not to have hope, he couldn't help but keep that spark alight that his suspicion was true. But first, he had to be sure. He'd talk to you next time you were there.

Well, unfortunately, you didn't look any more elated than the last time he saw you, which was already not a high standard. In fact, you were crying, and that made him want to stop his investigating right then and there just to comfort you, which scared him. But maybe he could do both, he thought, starting to head over to you.

Once he was only a few steps away, your head perked up from the sound and he stopped in his tracks, seeing your eyes red and puffy made him want to cry, too.

"Hey...y/n...I am so sorry about how dismissive I was last time you were here. I had something urgent I needed to do but I could have been much nicer about how I communicated that, can I sit with you?" Edward gestured to the other side of the booth you were draping your arms across.

"Hi Edward...yeah, you can. And it's okay, I totally understand. I shouldn't have been so pushy." You apologized back, wiping your eyes and straightening out your shirt to look more presentable across from him.

"No no no, please don't be sorry, this was on me but....are you okay? I don't mean to pry but you seem quite down. Did something happen?"

"Ha...yeah I guess. It's a lot of things, really, but I don't want to dump it all on you and ruin your night" you said, watching the headlights of passing cars through the window.

"Please, by all means, it's the least I can do to listen" he half smiled, rubbing his thumbs nervously in his closed hands.

Sighing, you took a drink of your water before starting.

"Well, I'm new to Gotham and I guess altogether I just wasn't ready for the city life like I thought I would be, you know? Where I grew up, I only had a few friends and even in my college town there wasn't much to do so I usually kept to myself. But I could always go outside whenever I wanted and it was mostly safe. Here, though, it seems like crime happens around every corner and I'm constantly on edge about getting mugged or raped or killed or god knows what else. I guess I just really miss my friends and I hate how cold and lonely this city feels-" your sentence is choked off with a sob as the tears you fought to control came back down your face.

Edward immediately reaches out on instinct to comfort you, a sensation which was foreign to him, and realizes what he's doing. Right before going to touch your shoulder, he stops to gauge your reaction that it's okay. You answer silently, leaning into his hand and feeling the heat of his palm warm your skin through the fabric of your shirt. He tries to rub you reassuringly, but his labored breathing gave away his inexpertise in even the most subliminal touching.

"I'm so sorry y/n. In a way I understand since I've always lived in Gotham, but I've also never known anything else so I can't imagine how difficult that transition is. How come you decided to leave everything and move here?" He questioned softly with his head lowered to meet your eyes.

"Well, I moved for work. It's essentially the same job I had as before but it pays much better and I guess I just wanted to make that sacrifice so I could save up, if that makes sense." You mumble, trying hard to keep the tears at bay once again.

"Yeah, it does. Do you mind me asking what you do?" he asked, despite already knowing the answer. He wanted to lead the conversation towards determining whether you were someone even worthy of the comfort he had already given.

"Oh, I'm a clinical lab technician at an animal hospital. I essentially just run different tests on specimen samples to help vets determine the health complications of animals." He nodded his head, acknowledging this like it was news.

"What got you interested in that kind of job? Do you like the new one more than the last?" He found that the previous job you had worked had no shady fraudulence, at least as far as he could find, which meant pretty much guaranteed.

"Well, it's complicated. The job itself I like because I love being in a lab setting and knowing that my work is used to save animals lives gives me...some sort of purpose that I can do good in this world. And I do like that my new job has more tech and tests for me to use is exciting but..." you trailed off, not sure you wanted to share this yet.

"But?" Edward pushed. Given what you had just said, it was safe for him to assume you definitely did not know about what was going on at the company. Which was both relieving for his sake and worrisome for yours.

"It's just that um...I got a new manager. The first one I liked and she really helped with my introduction to the lab but the new one is...a bit unprincipled." He watched as you bit your bottom lip, not making eye contact with him anymore. This news hit him like a freight train as he felt...protective. He definitely shouldn't, he barely even knew you yet.

"In what ways?" He almost whispered, trying to look up into your eyes with his head lowered down, worrying about your change in demeanor.

"He's been quite...forward with showcasing his advances towards me...." screw the formalities, you were just going to be blunt, you decided "multiple times he has grabbed me, made perverted comments towards me, and is incredibly condescending whenever I make the simplest mistakes. I would go to HR about it or something but he's from higher up in the company and I think if I did that I'd just end up getting fired. I can't lose this position, not after everything I gave up."

"That's so terrible, y/n, I'm sorry you're having to deal with that, I truly am." After giving your shoulder a squeeze, Edward drew his hand back and stared at you for a moment. Outwardly, he looked nonchalant but inside he was attempting to quell the burning anger he had for your despicable manager and everything this city is that has made you feel so downtrodden. He had to breathe deeply through his nose to calm down the side of him about to start the Riddler attacks.

In this time, you stared at him, seeing his jaw tighten slightly which you imagined had to do with anger in some way. Realizing you had made this whole conversation quite negative since the beginning, you decided that it was time to try something positive.

"Do you know the East Gotham Library downtown?"

"Huh? Oh uh...yeah I've been, why?" His trail of thought about how he was going to take out every corrupt person in this city was quickly stunted.

"I saw they were going to have a book sale this Saturday and wanted to go see if they have anything good, would you like to go with me? As friends, I mean?" you held your hand in your palm, your hair locks falling freely onto the table in a way that he wished he could picture and save forever.

Then, the weight of what you just asked him set in. Holy shit. You asked to hang out. Granted, it was as friends but he couldn't believe it. Someone as alluring as you was asking...him...the weird loner guy...to be friends? His face turned red against his wishes as he nodded a little too vigorously.

"YEAH! I mean yeah, I would absolutely love that" he stammered out

"Okay great! Would you like to meet up here around 1? I can pick you up if you'd like to go together"

"Yes, I would...I would love that" Edward was still fumbling over his words.

"Alright, well give me your number" Tossing your phone over to him, you saw his fingers effortlessly glide over the buttons despite his obvious nervousness.

"I'll see you then, Eddie, thank you for talking with me!" you beamed down at him as you grabbed your things, leaving the awestruck man sitting in the booth, still contemplating how this was even happening.

#okay andddd first one is up #this is prob the shittiest writing youll ever read if u even make it this far and i apologize for that #tbh this is 100% self indulgent but im tryna keep reader...somewhat general?#idk i mean like not superrrr specific things but she also needs a personality so ig its somewhere in the middle #anyway sorry for the fic sorry if u tried reading it im gonna go #eddie nashton #edward nashton smut #edward nashton slowburn #riddler #riddler fanfic #riddler x y/n #riddler x you #riddler x reader #paul danos riddler #the batman #eventual smut #slowburn #nsft #SoundCloud

33 notes · View notes

fumblingmusings · 10 months

Text

Not me finally reading Lovely As You Are and thoroughly enjoying every romantic conversation and kiss and dream like tone and getting to the final chapter and thoroughly enjoying Alfred knocking Ivan the fuck out and being like vindication for Ludwig fuck yeah only to end the fic and be genuinely hollowed out like a melon scoop because

Hi, I'm Abbie and I never learned to fuckin read

It is well and truly my

moment.

Anyway, 10 out 10 fic to blast through at 11pm. Just... read the tags, yeah? It is quite heavy.

#the author writes like hemmingway in that the dialogue has little markers or tags and everyone speaks as of dreaming and #ever so slightly insane #which i love in fics #like yes give me the melodrama give me the romantic monologues give me arthur musing how he would mourn alfred if he died in a fight whilst #alfred listens and indulges and holds him and bounces him around in a swimming pool like R U KIDDING ME #these guys are all mad good for them love a mad whirlwind romance im sure it will end GReaT 😭😭😭😭#i should start a tag #midnight fanfic musings for when I'm sleep deprived and read something that made me go brrrrrrrrrr #op

5 notes · View notes

strawberrycamel · 1 year

Text

starting to understand (and love) the whole "who cares if its perfect, just write whatever the hell you want. at the end of the day you're writing for YOU"

#i am so much less stressed writing things now #also im talking about fanfics specifically #and finally starting to understand the whole 'self-indulgent' thing #i definitely wrote stuff i enjoyed before/stuff for me but i was def more stressed about 'doing it right'#now when i get stressed writing something for fun i just go 'what would make me happy to put here' and then i do that #obv if its a gift for someone else/im trying to improve my writing then this might not apply as much but #yeah

3 notes · View notes

24-guy · 3 months

Text

Saw AU one-shot in the works. >:)

#j is talking again #im writing it similarly to a saw movie so opening kill - trap plot and external plot taking turns around each other - reveal of the killer #because special interest meets current hyperfixation go brrr #saw is the special interest and npmd is the current hyperfixation... if you couldnt tell #it will be my most self indulgent fanfic and i doubt many will enjoy it in comparison to my other stuff since... you know...#more blood and guts than my usual fluff and angst but like #fanfic is subjective and indulgent at its core #and i write for myself #yes ill somehow work michie into it trust me trust me trust me #they're my favourites how could i not do it #:DDDDDDD #i have MANY ideas and thoughts and everything okay

1 note · View note

villruu · 4 months

Text

i don't think yall truly understand how obsessed i am right now with Marble Hornets.

#I started writing fics for Sonic but Marble Hornets and the creepypasta related fandom were like THE fanfics for me #vrill talks #i love marble hornets SO MUCH #i am going crazy right neow #the ending fucked me up and im just [scratches wall of my enclosure]#i am so so so NOT normal over brian & tim relationship during the Masked and Hooded state #yall dont fucking understand how much it is making me go crazy #i wrote in less than a hour more than 1.5K of only Masky and Hoody surviving on the small companionship theyd had on each other while on th #run its so self indulgent and i want to write MORE #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #[EXPLODES]

1 note · View note

anakin-pilled · 5 months

Text

𝘨𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘰𝘶𝘴 - anakin skywalker x fem! reader (part two)

pairing: anakin skywalker x fem! reader

wordcount: 4.7k

warnings: no use of y/n

rating: rating: 18+ (my blog is 18+ only)

author's note: thank you so much to everyone who liked and reblogged the first chapter! it meant so much to me. i cant believe i managed to push out two chapters in a week!! this chapter might seem slow, but only because im still new to writing fanfics and im trying to find the right groove of things, but please be patient as i hope to fasten the pace and tension with the new few chapters. as always, proofread but please let me know if you see any mistakes and feel free to nicely provide any criticism or suggestions (pls). i really want to keep everything as canon compliant to the star wars universe (minus the timeline, that's unspecified), but i decided to take some creative liberties for minor cultural and geographic details. i get most of my information from wookiepedia or the star wars reddit, so if you have any questions about anything, i'm happy to send any links. okay im gonna stop yapping now. taglist at the bottom! creds to saradika for the header!

You couldn’t bear another moment of dinner with Anakin. Something about him set your nerves on fire and left you completely unsettled–in a good way, a way that you’ve rarely felt before. But it was a way that you didn’t know how to deal with, and this deeply troubled you. How were you going to spend the next ten rotations with him? It sounded like a disaster waiting to happen. You doubted Anakin would do anything wrong. No, you would be the one to do something wrong. Totally embarrassing yourself in front of him or unintentionally acting off-putting just because you found him too attractive.

Dammit, you were thinking like a schoolgirl with a crush.

After retreating to your quarters, you began to pace around your room. You had to get yourself out of this situation. Avoidance was always your favorite escape plan. It made life simpler when you avoided anything that made you uncomfortable or anxious. You weren’t exactly sure how you would avoid the 6’2 hunk of a Jedi. Asking Gido to remove him was out of the question. You couldn’t have Anakin removed, especially after the Chancellor had been kind enough to request one of the Jedi’s best members. You were being immature and you knew it. It hadn’t even been a full day and this man already made you so nervous that you felt like going haywire.

You gave yourself a small facepalm. “What am I going to do?” you whispered to yourself. You needed to put distance between you and Anakin. That way you would stay as unaffected as possible. Plus, it’s not like anything could happen between you two. Anakin was a Jedi, and you knew that the Jedi had some unorthodox rules surrounding relationships. However (a small and delusional) part of you already imagined a future between the two of you. You already imagined your lips on his. A man that captivating only came around every few millennia. Well, that was hyperbolic of you to think. Even you, a celebrity with access to Coruscant’s rich and famous upper echelon, never came across a man like Anakin. When was the last time you even got fucked or had one good Holodrama kiss? Dating is hard when you’re a celebrity. You meet people with the wrong intentions–cocky men who care more about having you as some sort of trophy or are afraid of looking beneath you just because you’re more rich than them. Plus, aside from the shitty dating pool, you were simply too busy with your career to indulge in relationships and sex. It honestly quite was ironic considering many of your songs revolved around love.

The more you thought, the more you felt trapped in your room. An intrusive thought popped into your head, but you quickly brushed away the thought before it got you in trouble. But then the thought appeared again, and you couldn’t help but entertain what your brain was saying.

Her presence is suffocating is the first thing Anakin thought as you left the room. As a trained Jedi, Anakin mastered the practice of shielding others' thoughts and emotions from affecting him. But you were being so loud through the Force. Anakin felt the same nervous energy he felt earlier in the day when he first met you. Except this time, he felt it ten times worse.

Anakin knew he was being quiet during dinner. But it was hard to focus with your energy screaming in his ears! So, he focused on trying to enjoy his meal instead. You were nice, Anakin would give you that. But he felt if he talked to you, while also trying to stave off your energy from his, he would overwhelm himself. It was all too distracting–a feeling that Anakin rarely felt.

Anakin then proceeded toward his assigned room, ready to prepare for the night. Luckily, he didn’t have to stay on guard the entire night as there was no threat direct threat to you in Coruscant. Sleep slowly became a stranger to Anakin in the past few months, so he welcomed the guest room’s luxurious, canopy bed with an unrefined flop. He lay there for a while, though he didn’t know how for long as he just stared at the window in front of him and thought.

Anakin suddenly heard a crash! noise coming from the living room. He quickly jumped into action and ran towards the sound. What if an intruder was trying to harm you? Anakin wouldn’t let them get near you. Though he would protect you, a pang of annoyance ran through Anakin’s head. How could anyone gain access to your apartment? He went through your security details with Gido and made sure that all access points were being guarded by either a security guard or a droid. Anakin hoped this wouldn’t become another Padme situation–he wasn’t in the mood for a high-speed speeder chase tonight. Better yet, why didn’t he sense anything? Were you distracting him so much that his senses were dull? Anakin couldn’t have that happening if you were both to survive the next ten rotations together.

As Anakin reached your living room and investigated the sound, he saw what object made the sound he heard. His eyes first laid sight on a broken flower vase. The turquoise vase was shattered into a million pieces on the floor. Anakin then looked at the figure next to the broken pottery and there you were, dressed in a dark robe, halfway to the entrance of your apartment. A look of shock, then brief fear and then embarrassment, went through your eyes when you saw Anakin standing before you with his arms crossed over his chest and his eyebrows raised.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Anakin questioned you with a glare. His voice had a deep edge to it. He was relieved that there was no intruder, but he wondered what you were doing. If he didn’t know any better, Anakin would say that it looked like you were in the middle of trying to leave your apartment. Except, Anakin did know better so he knew that was exactly what you were trying to do. The dark robes were a telltale sign of this–it disguised your figure and the hood covered a majority of your face.

You cleared your throat before putting on a tight-lipped smile, “Oh, I was just trying to night walk in the gardens before going to bed.”

“The gardens? I thought they were closed for renovations. That’s what Gido told me.” There was a slight smirk on Anakin’s face as he replied. He knew he had you.

“Not for me. I have special access…you know, the building manager is a fan of mine. Perks of being famous.” You felt slimy using that as an excuse, but it was better than letting the Jedi know your true intentions.

“Really?” Anakin admired you for doubling down on your lie, but once again, he could sense your energy through the force. You were hesitant, like you weren’t fully convinced of what you were saying either. Anakin continued, “Then why are you wearing such a thick robe? The weather has been warm lately, even at night. Don’t you think that you would sweat too much?”

You chuckled nervously before saying, “I sweat all the time.” You quickly shook your head. Kriff that’s not what I meant! you cursed in your head. “I mean I’m used to sweating during practice and performances so it does not bother me too much. I felt chilly which is why I decided to wear my robe on my walk. Please excuse me for disturbing you, General. I must have been in such a rush that I accidentally knocked over this vase. I assure you that I did not intend to raise any alarm.”

“It looks like you were sneaking out to me. Is that why you feel so tense right now? You know, we Jedi can sense emotion. I can sense that you’re not being truthful. There’s no lying to me, pop star.” Anakin replied smoothly.

You shook your head. It looks like your plan of trying to put distance between you and Anakin wasn’t going to work after all. You should have known–how could you outsmart a Jedi? It was easy to sneak out with your regular security staff, but Anakin was different.

“I apologize. You’re right. I wasn’t going to take a walk in the gardens. I thought I could visit the night market on level 3204, the Alderaan district. I just needed to clear my head. I didn’t tell because I didn’t think there would be an issue since I was going to keep my identity hidden.” Anakin noted how your apology sounded genuine.

“Level 3204. Isn’t that a bit far from you? I never suspected that you would stray anywhere past the 5000th level,” said Anakin. When people on Coruscant managed to achieve enough wealth to live on the 5000th level of Coruscant, it was very rare that they ventured anywhere below. The only people that ventured below were those dealing in shady business. That’s not to say that the 3000th level was necessarily bad–he knew that the lower levels were a mixture of the classes ranging from middle-class families to criminals. Anakin had been to almost all the levels of Corscant while on Jedi business. He had seen the most impoverished slums, where crime was rampant and everyone fended for themselves. Yet, he had also seen the richest that Coruscant had to offer–elegant restaurants, opulent theaters, and people dressed in the most expensive fabrics. It always amazed Anakin how in the capital city of the Republic, one of the richest planets in the galaxy, could house such a dichotomy.

You took offense to Anakin’s words. What did he know about you? Sure, you were wealthy and privileged, but that didn’t mean you had to confine yourself to a small circle of society. You enjoyed visiting what Coruscant had to offer–the different cultures, species, etc. It may have been unconventional for someone of your status, but your parents raised you with humility. Anything you earned in this life could be taken away from you at any moment, so you tried your best to explore and enjoy everything while you still could.

Now you weren’t thinking about this annoyingly handsome face or soft curls. You were thinking about how he pissed you off. Just another person making assumptions about who I am. Your eyes narrowed before dignifying Anakin with a response, “And where is it that I belong? Please enlighten me. What? Do you think just because I am rich, I wouldn’t dare mingle with anyone in a lower class than me?”

“That’s not how I intended my words to come across.”

“How did you mean for your words to come across?” Anakin felt your energy shift. You were no longer hesitant or nervous.

“What I mean is that it is unorthodox for celebrities to venture anywhere below Coruscant’s surface. It’s not exactly the most celebrity-friendly place. I would know as I’ve to the 3000th level several times before,” Anakin explained.

“Well, I’m an unorthodox person then. I’ll let you know that I enjoy the night market in the Alderaan district, it has good food and honest people. Now, you can either accompany me or stay here and make more assumptions about me. Whatever you choose, I will still be attending the night market. Feel free to tell Gido.” You turned around and continued walking toward your front door before you were stopped by Anakin.

“Kriff. You’re not going to make this easy, huh? Fine. I’m going with you to the market because it’s my duty to protect you, but don’t try anything.”

You first discovered this night market in Coruscant’s Alderaan district only a few months into your arrival on the planet. Your fame had not skyrocketed yet, so you could easily travel between Coruscant’s levels without being chased by HoloNet reporters or crazy fans. You stumbled upon the market one night while lost on level 3204. It was a serendipitous moment for you. The night market operated every night and was primarily inhabited by Alderaanian expats, however, there were a few stalls run by species from exotic planets who sold even more exotic goods and foods. At the time you discovered it, you were feeling homesick and lonely. Your home planet of Bar’leth was nothing like Coruscant. Though Bar’leth had some metropolitan cities, it also had greenery and fauna. And the population wasn’t nearly as dense as Coruscant! You grew up in Bar’leth’s capital city, but you could still name your neighbors and there was a sense of community. Coruscant had none of these features. The night market was more than just a market, it reminded you of a tiny piece of home in the most bustling place in all of the galaxy.

The familiar smell of grilled bantha skewers and roasted pormork flooded your senses. The area was decorated with a mixture of bright, fluorescent neon lighting and the warm, cozy light from twinkle lights from the vendor’s stalls. Light music played in the background from a live band playing in a corner somewhere. Though the market was mainly filled with adults, the occasional child and their family were seen. You and Anakin walked at a comfortable place in the middle of the road. Neither of you was talking, just observing the scene around you. You observed how people interacted with each other and made up life stories for them in your head. Anakin observed for any potential danger.

“I’m sorry for snapping on you earlier. I hate when people make assumptions about who I am. It’s a sensitive spot for me. You know, with my name always in the tabloids,” it was you who decided to speak first.

Anakin listened before responding, “Maybe I was wrong to make those assumptions about you.” He still thought it was odd that you wanted to venture so below the surface, but if there was one thing that Anakin understood, it was your disdain for assumptions. As the Chosen One, everyone made assumptions about Anakin—assumptions he should act or think. And somehow, Anakin always failed to live up to people’s assumptions of him. There were very few people in his life who accepted him the way he was. This was another point of contention in his life.

Instead of letting this event take place in a silent awkwardness like dinner, you decided to make an effort to keep the conversation going. Anakin didn’t directly apologize, but you took his words to be a positive sign. “I know it must be a shock to you that I wanted to visit this market. And you were partially right to judge, who would suspect that I stray far from my life on the surface? The truth is, no one would expect that from me which is exactly why I do what I do. Not even Gido knows that I come down here.”

“What makes this specific place worth sneaking out for? Aren’t there any other places you would rather be than down here?” Anakin asked this question sincerely. He was curious about you. While he was no stranger to Coruscant’s rich elite, the people he met were confined the the political sector. He knew how politicians acted and their thought processes, but he knew nothing about the other type of elite—the celebrities, like you.

“It reminds me of home, and the simple days I used to live before the glitz and glamour. There was a farmer’s market on Bar’leth I frequented with my family. There was local produce, lots of gourmet food, and trinkets of all kinds. I stumbled upon this market by happenstance one day and I never stopped visiting it ever since,” you explain truthfully. You loved the life you lived now and you were extremely grateful for it. But nothing could compare to your old life when you could enjoy the simple pleasures of life without any care in the world. Nowadays life barely gives you a chance to breathe since you were always working on something–whether it is new music, media appearances, or special performances. “You know, you’re actually the first person I have told about this place. You better keep it a secret, or else.” Anakin could tell you were joking by the smile on your face. He returned your joke with a small smile of his own.

You continued the conversation by asking Anakin a question of his own, “Don’t you have a special place that you like to visit when life gets too hectic?”

Anakin’s automatic response was to give you a generic answer. Before he could give you that generic answer, he changed his mind. He knew that was too guarded, but he couldn’t help himself. Anakin had been hurt too many times now–hurt by life, by his actions, and by the actions of others. Opening up was a recipe for disaster, especially when Anakin knew how passionately he felt about almost everything in his life. The only person Anakin managed to completely open up to was Padme, but even she was off-put sometimes by the level of passion and truthfulness he displayed. She never verbally admitted it, but Anakin could tell. Though you two didn’t know each other very well and have had minimal conversation so far, something about your energy invited Anakin to open up. Your energy in the force was serene. However, it wasn’t the type of serenity that Anakin felt whenever he was at the Temple. At the Temple, it was so peaceful, it was almost like it was devoid of any energy–it perfectly balanced all the energies of all the Jedi order and created a feeling of equilibrium. Your energy was serene in a way that reminded Anakin of his mother–comforting and warm. He could feel it radiating off your person. Ever since Anakin left with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, he could never sense that same energy in anyone else. Not even Padme, whose energy was more dynamic and loud. Thus, Anakin decided to be honest with his answer.

“There is a place that I like to escape to sometimes. It is located in a secluded corner of the Jedi temple and only accessible through the garden wing. I used to go there all the time as a Youngling and then a Padawan. It has the best view of Coruscant since it faces the intersection where the old Republic Theater house and Senate offices meet. On clear days, you can watch the sunset from there.” Anakin didn’t know that the Senate offices were in that direction until a few years after he moved to Coruscant. Once he found out Padme had stepped down as queen and became Naboo’s senator, he would stare at that intersection as a way to feel closer to Padme during their years apart. Despite the breakup, the spot still comforted Anakin because it served as a reminder of how far he had come. He was no longer a lovesick fool and rambunctious Padawan, but a mature and fully-fledged Jedi Knight. Through the transitional nature of life, that spot would always be there for Anakin.

It was your turn to nod and listen to Anakin.

“How was it like…growing up in the Temple?,” you hesitated, not wanting to overstep any boundaries with Anakin. You remember how the tone of his voice earlier when you questioned him about Tatooine.

“Growing up in the temple was…different. When I first arrived, I didn’t realize I would be living in a religious organization. There’s a lot about the Jedi that was very different from the life I lived on Tatooine. Though I can’t complain too much, I had a permanent roof over my head and food on my plate every day. And, there was practically no sand at all. The best part,” Anakin finished.

“I imagine it’s like one big family, no?”

Anakin sucked his teeth in response before continuing, “Since I arrived at the Temple later than the normal age, I didn’t grow up with my crèche. We had lessons together every now and then, but if there was anybody I considered like family to be in the Temple, it would be my former master Obi-Wan, and my Padawan Ashoka. She’s actually a fan—I promised her I would try to get an autograph.” Anakin looked sheepish at the mention of the autograph.

“Remind me before you leave. I’ll make sure to sign something. Should I sign her lightsaber?” You made sure to make a serious face while looking at Anakin. Then, you let out a giggle. “I’m only kidding about the last part. Come on, let’s get something sweet.” Your pace picked up before leading Anakin in another direction.

You stopped by a stall owned by an older Twi’lek lady who sold homemade rishi honeystix. The honeystix quickly became your favorite item at the market because of its’ sweet flavor and crispy batter. They were similar to a childhood favorite snack of yours, except the rishi honeystix was fried, not baked.

“Can I have two honeystix please?” you asked the owner. She nodded yes before you handed her over the credits, adding some extra for a tip. The owner quickly prepared the dessert before handing it to you and sending a warm smile to both.

“Enjoy the sweet treat! I love seeing young couples like you visit the market,” she stated with a look of adoration on her face.

You and Anakin straightened your postures and sent a sheepish smile to the owner.

“Oh, we’re not-” “She’s not my-” You both said at the same time.

The owner giggled out an apology before turning her back on the both of you and preoccupied herself with preparing more food.

Her comment affected you more than you would have liked to admit. You couldn’t say you wished you were dating Anakin, you hard knew him after all. But the idea of someone mistaking you to be in a relationship with someone as attractive as Anakin made you feel a funny feeling. You felt a moment of giddy before telling yourself to calm down.

You led Anakin toward an old fountain that sat in the middle of the market. “Ever tried these before? They’re the best! I don’t come here too often anymore, but whenever I do, I make an effort to buy these.” You then handed Anakin his dessert.

“I don’t think I have had these before. The Jedi diet consists of the Temple’s cantina food and whatever rations we have for off-world assignments. Though I try to explore new foods when I have the chance,” Anakin stated. He picked up the dessert and observed it. Anakin didn’t have much of a sweet tooth, but he was intrigued by its flavor. A sweet aroma wafted off the dessert and even Anakin felt tempted to try it.

You were looking toward the distance as Anakin inspected the dessert. You were about to take a bit of your honeystix when you made eye contact with a small figure in the distance. As your eyes focused on the figure, you realized you were looking at a young Rodian child. Their gaze shifted from your eyes to the dessert in hand. Despite the Alderaanian district being one of the more wealthy districts in the lower levels, many families still lived in borderline poverty. You smiled at the child in reassurance before getting up from the fountain and slowly making your way towards them.

Anakin looked up at the sound of your figure getting up and was about to ask you where you were going before he saw you walk to a child and kneel before them. He couldn’t hear what you were saying, but he saw you hand over your honeystix to the child. You hugged the child goodbye, but not before handing them a few extra credits. The child’s purple eyes widened and a bright smile appeared on their face. They gave you another hug before retreating to wherever they came from.

You got back up from the ground and walked back toward the fountain without saying anything to Anakin. You continued like nothing happened and asked Anakin, “Did you enjoy it?”

He ignored your question. “What was that about?” He was referring to the instance in which you gave away your dessert to a child.

“I saw the little one looking at my food, so I decided to go over there and offer it to them. I could tell she was hungry. It’s alright, I can always buy myself another.”

Anakin always believed that you could tell a lot about a society or individuals based on the way they treated children. He hated Tatooine and regarded it as one of the lowest civilized planets in the entire galaxy–for many reasons, of course, but the primary reason is that those on Tatooine had no issue trafficking children into slavery and treating them as chattel. He wished that more people displayed kindness toward him as a child. Anakin’s only crime was being born into the world, but aside from that, he was innocent and deserved to be treated with dignity and humanity. You were kind. It seemed like a bare minimum requirement to be astonished at, but with the type of people Anakin has had the displeasure of meeting, kindness was a trait he rarely witnessed outside of the Temple walls.

You stared at Anakin as if you were waiting for him to say something, but he simply observed your face without saying anything. A timid look washed over your face before you turned your head to the side and blew a piece of hair out of your face.

“Well, I think it’s time we head back.”

Being with Anakin was different than you expected. At first, you were overwhelmed by his presence–caught off guard by the fact he looked like a literal god from one of those classical paintings located in one of Corucant’s largest art galleries. You’ve always had a soft spot for pretty boys. Plus, you also had a penchant for romanticizing almost every interaction and person in your life. Not always in the romantic sense though. From brief strangers to friends, you tried to put a positive spin on everyone you encountered. There was no way of telling if fate was real, but you liked to believe so. Anakin was no exception to these rules.

You were so close to successfully sneaking out of your apartment, without being detected, until you accidentally bumped into that stupid vase. Anakin came running out while you scrambled to make it look like you hadn’t been caught in the middle of doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing. You knew that if Anakin found out that you were leaving the building, he would either force you to say or contact your manager. So, you lied and tried to convince him you weren’t sneaking out. Of course, he saw through you and you gave up without a fight, until he made that stupid comment. Lying was never your strong suit anyway and it wasn’t worth the hassle anyway. So, Anakin joined you on your night adventure.

Though you were initially anxious, once to got to the market, you felt your head clear. This was your comfort place, and it soothed your racing heart and clouded mind. Once you were past that anxiousness, you found that Anakin had a calming presence, once you got over your initial nerves. Anakin was observational, though it was expected of him to be so. However, it felt like he was really listening to you and clinging to what you said. He looked pensive as you described why you liked the night market so much. You wanted to make conversation with him, you didn’t feel forced to. Maybe it was the nature of the predicament you were both and the fact that he would be your bodyguard for the next week and a half, but you felt drawn to him. You wanted to know more about who the “Hero with No Fear.” You feared that if you got to know him anymore, then you might fall for him. Except, you had to stop yourself before it went any deeper than that. Once again, you reminded yourself that Anakin was a Jedi. Off-limits. So, as you settled into bed, you promised that you would actually keep your distance. There was no use in getting attached to him. The Jedi belonged to no one.

taglist: @angie2274 @bunnylovesani @0709fullofstars @js-favnanadoongi @payton-dixonreader it wasn't letting me tag u ):

#kendra's works !!!#star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars fandom #sw fanfic #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #anakin x you #tcw anakin #anakin x y/n #the clone wars #darth vader #darth vader x reader #hayden christensen

94 notes · View notes

a-random-weeb · 8 months

Text

BSD men x reader sick headcannons

im sick as well as my friend so fml I'm writing this

Warnings: le sick, this is kind of self indulgent in a way but at the same time your sick so... you have the right while your sick.

Autre warnings: this is my first fic, it's probably gonna suck ;-;

also soup is the food of the gods in this for some reason

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dazai:

•he bursts out laughing at first, making fun of you (in a friendly way)

•Once he's done with his laughing fit, he does (try to) take care of you

•ok he's not the worst at taking care of people, but I feel like the worst part would be him making fun of you

•he won't let you go to work/school (if you're a student like in highschool pretend you're older), just because he's laughing at you, doesn't mean he doesn't care.

•he'd cuddle you, then end up getting sick, then you take care if him and cuddle him, then you get sick and so on until one of you realizes you can't cuddle (aka you, and he complains. This is the same for Nikolai)

•he pisses you off, but he loves you

"how did you get sick?!" He laughs as he hands you a bowl of soup, as you lie in the silky sheets of your shared bed with the worst cold of your life. You shoot him a glare as you take the soup in your shaking hands, making sure not to drop it.

"I already told you, my coworker got me sick!" You begin to eat your soup, frustrated and pissed. He plants a kiss on your forehead

"I'll call your work and tell them you're taking the day off!" He skips to the other room. You lie there, thankful for your lovely boyfriend.

(I don't simp for dazai so it was hard to write for him. This is my first fanfic EVER, be quiet. I only put dazai at the top for a friend.)

˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖˚♡˚˖♡︎˖

Chuuya:

•He's easy to anger, so when you get sick, he knows you probably did something stupid to get yourself sick.

•Unlike Dazai, he's a good cook, but still he makes you soup, and angrily holds it out to you.

•he takes care of you, but acts angry the whole time. I say acts, but he really is angry, but he also cares about you. But is still angry.

•he's not Bakugou level angry, he's still calm(ish)

•he does verbally abuse you the whole time though.

•But it's not actually abuse. I feel like he just calls you dumbass and idiot.

•he's very forceful with everything he does ("eat! Or I'll force feed you!") ←(this is my fav head cannon for him, he would)

•He cuddles you, but somehow this man does not get sick, until he does, then you take care of him, but he doesn't let you touch him while taking care of him so the same thing that happened with dazai doesn't happen with you. There will be no cycle.

•He also buys you a lot of expensive medicine

•you piss him off, but so does everything

"You idiot! How the hell did you get yourself sick?!" He hands the bowl soup to you.

"I was playing in the rain with a cat." You give him an innocent look as he shoots you a glare.

"Why?! You knew it would get you sick!"

"but... there was puddles... and a cat who liked water..."

Chuuya facepalms. "Seriously?!" He sighs, calming himself down. He sits next to you on the bed as you eat your soup. He's rich, and I feel like you begged him to buy a tv for he bedroom. You guys watch my hero academia. Even though I said he cuddles you while sick, I don't think he'd actually unless you cling to him, then he'll let you sometimes. But he just sits on the other side of the bed as you watch anime together, and pass out in eachothers presence.

(I cringed at this one, it wasn't as good as I hoped. I made him a tiny bit ooc too ;-; idk I feel like it's good for a first time.)

✧.𖥔 ݁ ˖𖦹⭒°｡⋆✧˖°.✧˖°.✧˖.𖥔 ݁ ˖𖦹⭒°｡⋆°.✧˖°.✧˖°..𖥔 ݁ ˖𖦹⭒°｡⋆

Kunikida:

•He's nicer than the rest of them

•He's the only decently normal one of the boys.

•he makes you soup and blah blah blah

•He doesn't cuddle you, he has common sense

•You don't want to get him sick either, so....

•He buys you medicine, he knows the best kinds

(I couldn't think of a scenario. Sorry)

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

Akutagawa:

•Has no idea what to do

•He thinks you're gonna die so he makes this whole dramatic speech

•All you have is a common cold 😭

•after he figures out you're not gonna die, he asks what he can do

•He goes to the store to buy you medicine

•He doesn't know what else to do

•you tell him it's fine and all you need is a few days off of work

•He feels too bad, so he goes on one of those weird websites

•Next thing you know he comes in a skateboard and circling around you, chanting these weird, demonic words 😭

•"Wa bubu shaaaaaa qut epeu turu!"

"Aku wth are you doing?!"

"Curing your sick"

𓍢ִ໋✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚♡✧˖°~∆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚𓍢ִ໋✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚♡✧˖°~∆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚𓍢ִ໋

I too lazy to write for anyone else, this is a quick drabble and my first fanfic. I hope you liked it!

#Chuuya x reader #Dazai x reader #Bsd fluff #Kunikida x reader #Bsd x reader #Le sick #I am sickkkk whyyyyyy #doppo kunikida #Chuuya Nakahara #bsd skk #headcannons #bsd akutagawa #akutagawa ryuunosuke #Bungou stray dogs #Akutagawa x reader #BSD fluff

127 notes · View notes

klutzyroses · 1 year

Note

Hii Im sorry if im late but i just wanted to ask if you can write a little story fanfic on Mc drunk but nothing very explicit just like maybe when she isn’t drunk she’s composed and stoic but when she is maybe trying to flirt with everyone. If thats to much can you do Sebastian,Mozart and Comte? Thank you.

The only late one here would be me, I'm afraid.

IkeVamp: Drunk Flirty SO

How do they handle a stoic s/o who is very flirtatious when drunk?

Suitors: Mozart, Comte, Sebastian

Mozart

Yes, because that is exactly what he needs in his life right now.

The pianist is a jealous man. That is a known fact, a fact that Y/N should know very well. And he never expects the solemn, often withdrawn young woman to be anything but.

That is why the man is completely blindsided when just a glass of wine in her system is enough to completely unwind her into the brazen minx she is hiding underneath.

And Jean seems to be the man on the receiving end of her temporary collapse in judgment.

The poor man in question is at a complete loss at how to deal with the seductive woman before him, cooing obscene things at him.

It isn't until she starts murmuring about kisses that the musician peels her off the soldier and handles her out into the hallway, quietly seething as he guides her to bed. He glares down at the beauty with her hair fallen around her like a halo as she lay on the bed, looking tempting as ever.

However, he summons all his will and instead leans into her ear, his voice like a lullaby, stern as his words may be.

"When you are sober, you and I are going to have a very serious discussion."

Comte

Oh dear...Oh cherie.

He is quite used to the quiet, reserved maiden who carried herself with such dignity and elegance.

So seeing that same maiden become a sloe eyed vixen currently leveling sultry looks towards Leonardo is quite the...surprise.

Not a particularly welcome one either, if he was being honest.

Especially since Leonardo himself isn't making much of an effort to rebuff the woman's scandalous advances. He seems to be having the time of his life actually, fully indulging the usually stoic woman's whims.

Well, at least he was until Comte's edged, layered smile has him chuckling and finally getting Y/N to settle down enough for Comte to take her without issue. He opts to keep her with him, if they are out in public, then she will not be leaving his side until they get home.

Even as they return to the mansion, he makes sure she gets to her room unharmed. As she meets his gaze with her own lascivious, suggestive look, he can't help but caress her cheek tenderly before resting his finger under her chin.

"Not tonight but perhaps soon, ma cherie. Very soon."

Sebastian

Sighhhh...he can feel a headache coming on...

Watching Y/N go from a quiet, composed young lady to...well, whatever this was.

Having had just a little too much to drink, she was now leaning flirtatiously on the arm of (The very amused) Arthur, her gleaming eyes glazed over and unfocused as she murmurs suggestive words to the mystery author.

The butler eventually has to pull her away because he fears she may start disrobing any moment now. And that is not something he believes he can stomach.

He steers her all the way to her room, ignoring her attempts to seduce him before he lays her down on the bed.

He makes sure she is laying down comfortably, lest she finds some way to hurt herself.

He tucks her in and takes it upon himself to remain at her side until she is asleep, having to withstand her bedroom eyes until she is out cold. Which thankfully for him doesn't take too long as she lulls into a deep slumber. A gloved hand gently moves the hair out of her pretty face as she remains asleep.

"You are such a handful. You're lucky I'm able to hold myself back as well as I do."

🌸

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp mozart #ikevamp comte #ikevamp sebastian #ikemen vampire headcanons #ikevamp headcanons

148 notes · View notes

chaoticedward · 1 year

Note

so likeeee what’s your opinion on freedom fries(soldier x spy)?? imo i love them very very very much and im so starved of any content of them that just seeing them next to each other i go “GAYYYY?????” so i will gladly appreciate any content of them if you don’t mind!!!

ANON YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE HOW HAPPY I AM THAT YOU ASKED THAT; my thoughts on this ship are long as hell so its under the cut but tldr i love them so much

i ADORE freedom fries with my entire heart!!! i think they dynamic between these two is just so hilarious like it would never ever ever work in theory but in practice these two idiots compliment each other's personalities so well. its not even like "book smarts x street smarts" which is what im usually into its like. "complete lunatic x extremely fancy gentleman with 0 patience for idiocy" but somehow soldier slipped through the cracks. theres just something that draws spy to him. im not sure what it is and i dont think spy knows what it is either but he is just so so infatuated with solly

i think that maybe spy has this internal need to "protect" soldier from his own stupidity (man can and will get himself hurt, i mean thats just canon) and i think he'd get really mad and say "dont you ever do that again!!!!" to solly a lot when he does stupid stuff, but solly just smiles in response and spy melts into his arms and everything is okay.

ofc i think solly cares a lot too but hes def a little nervous!! he really doesnt want to screw things up and probably tries to prove that he can be a gentleman every now and then (ending in horrible failure, which then ends with the two laughing and kissing) but usually he is just absolutely himself around spy and spy just adores him and his unpredictability

i actually have a whole tf2 fanfic thats abt 115,000 words long (im a huge writer) where freedom fries takes place for a little bit (but things dont work out since the Spy is a Spy, and soldier and engineer have some history) but i REALLY want to write another fic where they do work out because i essentially only included them in the story becuase i. simply wanted to indulge my love for this ship fskjfs if i ever do any freedom fries drabbles ill post them with art!

PLS PLS PLS if you have any freedom fries ideas or headcanons send them in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will very gladly draw them!!!!

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 soldier #tf2 spy #spy x soldier #freedom fries #asks #my art

399 notes · View notes

sluckythewizard · 1 month

Text

BUT IM NOT A WRITER. something strange possessed me to write my first proper fanfic in maybe a decade. be niceys to me but also grill me so i can get stronger. this one is a stupidly self indulgent bit between Soda and Emizel, a day or so after emizel was sired. CW for gore descriptions, but thats about it i think. image below is a snippet of the start. the rest of the whole dang thing will be under the cut. ive never posted fanfic ever in my life. read my tags for secret behind da scenes commentary

"Oh shit… I think hes dead…" It was another night, another patrol, another fight, and another win, for Emizel and Soda.

Under moonlight, under street light, under interwoven wires above, the two stood here in a quiet and damp alleyway. The air was drenched with the smell of a previous rain, and the puddles of said storm remain huddled in corners and pot holes.

One splashed as soda found himself stepping forwards into one. The residual adrenaline of the fight had left his body shaking, his heart still pounding, his wounds still throbbing. They had still won; or more-so, Emizel had won. A particularly nasty blow to the side had Soda reduced to the side lines for most of the fight, left to watch as his newly vampiric comrade had absolutely eviscerated the competition.

Emizel had only been turned a day ago, but it was impossible not to notice how it had changed him. He already acted so goddamn confident, so on top of the world, and this newfound power, newfound speed and strength, only built upon his insane ego.

The Fangs that they encountered here on this night stood no fucking chance. Emizel was too quick, too strong, and he easily chased off the rivals. It was only now, as the final unfortunate opponent had turned to flee, a clean clock in the jaw sent the human tumbling to the ground with a dull thump, and it did not move afterward.

Soda shifts his shoe out of the puddle, the cold seeping into his sock being one of the few things keeping his mind in his body in the moment. Is the guy breathing?

A low laugh bleeds from Emizel as he stretches his arms, licking his sharpened teeth as he stares off in the direction the remaining Fangs went. Soda knew that look on his face, the look of a tiger pondering on its next kill, he knew well that Emizel wanted to chase them.

But the guy on the ground.. It was one punch to the face, and the wicked crack sound that came from it had planted a seeding dread within Sodas chest.

As he steps forward, around the puddle, the resulting sound made Emizels attention click back over to Soda, the snap of his gaze making Soda flinch.

The two lock eyes, and Soda weakly gestures to the limp body on the floor. "The uh.. I think.. Is that guy dead?" He finally asks, having a hard time keeping contact with Emizels intensely red eyes.

Emizel turns his attention to said body, tilting his head as he goes to kick at the thing, turning it over. "Man no way hes dead, I punched him once." He mutters.

"Well, yeah, but his head almost twisted all the way around when you did.." Soda steps up to stand beside Emizel, the two boys standing with their hands in their pockets, down at this unfortunate, limp body.

"Should we hide it?" Soda asks, glancing back over at Emizel, who had.. An odd look on his face. He was clearly pondering something, but Soda could only guess whatever was going on in that brilliant head of his. He knew and trusted that Emizel was smart. If anyone could figure out what to do about this, it would be him.

But the lack of an answer had anxiety chewing at the back of Sodas rib cage, and after a second, he speaks up again, compelled to fill what he perceived as a tense silence. "Like.. I dunno, I've never uh... killed a guy..." He shrugs, prompting Emizel to let out a big sigh.

"He's not dead man, just out fuckin cold." Emizel kneels down next to the body, putting an ear up to its chest, and pondering on that for a moment. An uncertainty twists his expression, as he decides to instead place a hand on the victims throat, checking for a pulse. A moment passes, and seemingly finding nothing, he pulls back.

"Uh... Okay, so he might be dead."

Something about the confirmation from Emizel made a shiver run up Sodas spine. That, or maybe it was just the breeze agitating the cold water in his shoe.

"Huh… Damn.." Was all that Soda could really get to leave his mouth. Which was hardly a splash compared to the torrent that was slowly churning in his head. They just killed a guy. Or, Emizel just killed a guy. And it was so easy. They had to hide the body now, right? That was the usual progression here? Getting caught for murder was way more extreme than getting caught for breaking mailboxes with soda cans. It was so, so disturbingly easy. It really was just one punch. It's not like the Fangs are weak by any means, so just one punch? And this guy is dead? Forever?

Or, perhaps by human means, their rivals were fairly tough. But Emizel was on a whole other level. No mortal could stand up to him now...

"Hey, are you okay?"

The question had pulled Soda back from his head, his gaze flicking back over to Emizel, who was looking up at him with those eerie, piercing red eyes. Soda felt another shiver.

"Uh, ieah man, I'm all good." Soda nods, swallowing down whatever anxiety was bubbling up in his throat.

But Emizel didn't seem satisfied by his answer, standing back up and staring down his human comrade. Soda couldn't meet his eyes, his gaze instead traveling downward, and pausing on Emizels red, cut-up shirt. There was something off about the color, the way it seemed darker in some spots, brighter in others.. Wait, wasn't Emizel wearing a white shirt before all this?

The vampire boy seems to pick up on Sodas expression, following his eyes down to his shirt. "Oh, yeah! While you were on the floor, the knife guy got me a little" He says, a stupidly simple smile on his face. Soda was about to let out a laugh at how unbothered his friend seemed by it, but it gets caught in his throat when Emizel goes to pull his shirt up.

The sound of the bloodied fabric peeling away from skin made Sodas own skin crawl, but that wasn't nearly as bad as the sight of the intense gash running from his collar bone, down to his stomach.

"Oh, fuck dude!" Soda gasps, but Emizel laughs it off. Even despite knowing Emizel well, Soda was still surprised by just how much Emizel could shrug off. "Shit, doesn't that hurt, dude?"

"Oh yeah this fucking hurts!" he says with a laugh, his smile big and toothy and proud as he presents this egregious wound. Swollen and angry, pulsing with a slow heartbeat, and still oozing with thick, dark blood.

The sight of the split flesh, and the glints of bone beneath the dark, dark red all tugged at Sodas gag reflex, and yet he couldn't pull his eyes away. So Emizel's just been walking and talking so normally this whole time with his chest just cleaved wide open? Soda felt just as impressed as he felt horrified.

It wasn't until Emizel reaches down to poke at the abhorrent wound that Soda snaps out of it. Watching his friend press his fingers into the bloodied flesh, and slowly pulling it apart, allowing more ichor to seep from the gash, it was too much to watch at this point.

Soda reaches up to put a hand on Emizels wrist, the vampire boy stopping, and looking up at his friend.

Soda found himself freezing again when he locks eyes with Emizel. He was going to say something now, right? "U-uhm.." Is all he really chokes out, giving Emizels wrist a gentle tug. "D-do you. Uh. I suppose a hospital Isn't a place you can go anymore..?"

Emizel just smirks at that, letting Soda pull his hand away from the wound. "Oh, yeah no, but it's fine. I mean, I don't think it's gonna kill me" He shrugs. It was so, so impressive just how unphased Emizel was by all this. Fuck he's actually so cool.

"Well yeah man but it's like, still a bleeding hole. Like you're soaked in blood dude, I'm pretty sure that even a vampire needs that stuff on like, the inside." Soda rubs the back of his head, still unnerved by the sight of it all. "Vampires have like, super healing, don't they?"

"Oh yeah like, regeneration powers. I know I heal faster sometimes but I dunno how to just, activate it on command.." Emizel hums, his eyes narrowing down at his own injury, as if trying to will it into mending. Soda looks away, unable to watch that vile gash ooze any longer.

"I dunno man, how do they do it in like, video games?" Soda tosses the question out, trying to click together some sort of solution in his own head.

"Uhhh.. Huh, video games.." Emizel repeats to himself, chewing on the thought while idly poking at the laceration; until an idea audibly flickers to life in his head. "Oh, I just gotta refill my blood meter. Or whatever."

"Oooh yeah, blood meter!" Soda perks up, "Of course, see this is why you're the brains, man" Soda smiles, glancing back over to his cool friend, but immediately needing to look away again when the sight of that egregious gash tugs bile back into his throat.

While Soda averts his eyes, Emizels eyes wander back over to the body, and that classic 'Emizel has a bad idea' smile creeps across his face.

"Well, if this guys dead, I'm sure he's not gonna need all that blood.." He grins, kneeling down next to the body again.

The word 'wait' had hardly gotten the chance to crawl from Sodas mouth, before Emizel lifts up the arm of the unfortunate body, pulling the sleeve back, and immediately sinking his teeth into the exposed wrist.

The sound and the sight of blood gushing around Emizels teeth made Soda cringe, his hand impulsively coming up to aide his own wrist. An empathetic phantom pain made his wrist ache, his imagination simulating the feeling of shark teeth cutting into skin, sinking deep into the flesh, and clacking against bone. That was a lot of blood, that was streaming down the arm of this fodder.

A low growl bleeds from Emizel as he adjusts his teeth, cutting into more flesh, opening the wound further, and allowing a pulsing torrent of red to stream down his chin, onto his coat. It was an annoying thing, to clean blood out of clothing. Most of the Demons deemed it easier to just let the stains remain. But the night that Emizels throat was torn open, and liters upon liters were granted freedom from his human form, the unbelievable mess had practically changed half the color of Emizels iconic coat.

That was the first time Soda had ever seen that much blood from one person. And well. This would probably be the second.

The sight was unnerving, but it was impossible to look away. The alley was quiet, save for the distant bustle of a distant city, which made the noisy squish and squelch of teeth gnawing on flesh all the more apparent and nauseating.

Emizel had become a monster for sure, and watching it feed on something was… thrilling, in a way. It reminded Soda of feeding a pet spider, or lizard. A mouse for a snake.

It's a heavy thing to witness, the end of a human life. The fear of death is a primal thing, and Soda was no different from any other living thing. He figured everyone else feared death just as much as he does. Well, maybe except for Emizel, of course.

It made sense. Emizel was such a cocky and noisy kind of guy, but hes always had the power to back it up. Even when he lost, or seemed at his lowest, Soda still saw this sort of fire in him, one that Soda admired.

Of course Emizel would be the one to become something like a vampire. Something that Soda had always figured was just a fantasy creature thing. He wondered; if vampires were real, what else was real? Werewolves? Zombies? Unicorns? Are there real demons? Like from hell? Is hell real? Is he going to hell?

The sudden ttteeeeaaaaarrrr of flesh rips soda from his wandering thoughts. Emizel was tugging his head away from the arm of his kill, his teeth clamped down into the chewed meat, and pulling it apart. Soda had seldom seen so much of the inside of a human arm, and the sight of spilling threads and squirming veins was hardly something he ever wanted to stomach again.

"Oh fuck, dude, hey-" Soda steps forward, raising a hand, but the way Emizel snaps his head back over to him, twisting to an unnatural degree, Soda cant help jolting back.

Reddened teeth glint menacingly in the low light, a threatening growl thundering from its clenched, dripping jaws. Emizels eyes were focused, yet wild, glowing with whatever light they could reflect.

Sodas eyes were wide, and his body was frozen in the thick, electric tension within the air. It was like staring down an angry dog.. Suddenly a light bulb in his head flickers to life. It was kind of like an angry dog, right? One hunched over a meal it didn't want to give up. Memories of old encounters and unfortunate dog bites resurface in Sodas head, and with that experience, and with those lessons learned, he gathers the courage to react.

He shuts his eyes, keeping them closed for a few seconds, as he slowly pulls back his arm, and slowly steps back. It was an eye contact thing, wasn't it? Eye contact makes dogs angry, right? That was how you dealt with an angry dog? As he pulls back, and takes in a breath for composure, he finally dares to peek at the angry vampire before him again.

Its snarling had died down, but its eyes were still trained intently on Soda. After a tense, and agonizingly, slow pause... It blinks back, lowering its head back down to its meal, but keeping its anxious stare on this potential threat.

A relieved sigh falls from soda as the tension finally melts. He didnt realize he was holding in so much of his breath. "O-okay, man.. It's yours, you uh.. Earned it.." Soda mutters, stepping back further, until he was standing in a sufficiently dry enough space to sit down in. Now that he wasn't standing, he was finally taking into mind just how much his hands were shaking.

It's odd. Soda couldn't really describe this feeling thrumming in his chest as something like fear.. Nausea? For sure. Disturbed and rattled? Oh absolutely. This was certainly a sight he would have a hard time scrubbing from his eyelids when he sleeps tonight. But he wasn't scared. The memory of the night that Emizel was sired still coated the inside of his mind like an unwashable film. Even in that moment, when the unnatural teeth from the unnatural maw of an unnatural thing hovered over his throat, he couldn't say with confidence that he was scared.

Emizel really is his best friend in the world. And he knows with his whole heart that Emizel feels the same. He knew and trusted that his best friend would never hurt him. Not too badly at least. He loves Emizel, and would give anything to support him.

Like a mouse to a snake.

This really is an incredible power that his comrade had come across, and Soda especially felt a sort of pride in his friend. He felt it was worth it to help him feed it.

The bile in his throat had made its point, and Soda agreed, that watching someone die, and get torn apart and drained might be too much for him. Despite how much he hated the Fangs, the end of any human life seemed like such a jarring thing. To have such an intense fear finally get confronted. Would he go to hell?

Maybe he couldn't just feed people to his friend. So an alternative could be donated blood, right? Soda wouldn't mind giving up something like blood. His body makes it for free, after all. Maybe some other Demons would agree to give up some blood too. But they shouldn't have to take on such a burden. Soda wouldn't mind being the only one. The only one. The only one.

His hand comes up to rub at his neck, as his imagination conjures up what it might feel like to have teeth sink into his flesh. He's been stabbed before, is that sort of what it would feel like? Would he have to get stitches? He didn't really want to get stitches, so maybe there could be a more effective way to get the blood out of him. And there was so much vital stuff in his neck too. There's' a vein that's safe to cut into somewhere, right? He would have to look that up later.

A STARTLING RINGING;

Splits the moment,

Prompting both Soda and Emizel to jolt in shock,

As the phone in Emizels pocket rings away.

Acting as if nothing abnormal had taken place, Emizel pulls out his phone, and answers it.

"Heyy, Johnny! Yeah we chased em off, I don't think those bastards will be infesting this street again anytime soon. Yeah, ieah we'll be heading back soon. Oh fuck yeah dude, save us some!"

Emizel covers the speaker of his Nokia, turning back to Soda with a big smile on his violently bloodied face. "They got some pizza waiting for us back home, dude!" he whispers out to him.

Soda does his best to crack a smile, and to suppress the look of unease that probably stained his face, as he stares at the literal murder scene that's been splattered about in front of him.

"Oh, yeah, hell yeah man.." He swallows down the bile again. "What kind of uh.. Soda did they get?"

Emizel ponders that, before turning back to the phone to ask Sodas question.

"Sprite and a big pack of that one strawberry mountain dew" Emizel tosses the answer back over to Soda, who gives a nod, and thumbs up.

Mountain dew is so neat, Soda really liked all the wacky flavors those guys come up with. The thought of going home and opening a can of soda was certainly a comfort. After witnessing all this blood and gore and viscera, Soda absolutely needed to get back home and get a nice cold glass of something bright red .

As Sodas mind wanders off to soda, Emizel wraps up the conversation on the phone, before hanging up, and standing up.

The movement had pulled Sodas mind back into the moment, enough for him to timidly voice a concern he's had since the start of this debacle.

"Uh, hey, so.. The body, should we… Uh.." He gestures vaguely to it, and Emizel grants it a nonchalant glance.

"Eh, I can toss it into a dumpster or something, I dunno. I'm sure its fine. I'll handle it."

The vampire boy goes to pick up the corpse, the wound in its mangled arm no longer even dripping with blood, the flesh pale from the absolute absence of red in its veins.

"Go ahead and meet me by that one mailbox, the one with the bullet hole in it." Emizel casually instructs, tossing the drained body over his shoulder. "I'll catch up."

"Uh, yeah, okay.." Soda musters up a nod, and the strength to rise back up to his feet, wincing as that bruise on his side makes itself loudly known again. He still felt anxious, but even despite it all, he knew he could trust Emizel to take care of things. He always does. "Just stay safe man, I'll see you there." Soda assures with a smile, and Emizel matches it, tossing him a wink. And then suddenly- -He's gone! If Soda had blinked he would've missed it, but he was fortunate enough to just barely catch the glimpse of Emizel darting off at an inhuman speed, probably looking for a place to dump the body. Right, he would take care of it. Emizel always makes sure his crew is taken care of. Well... Guess all that's left for Soda is for him to walk back to that meeting spot. He looks around the alley for a moment, taking in the sight of that enormous pool of blood in the middle of the concrete. Or whatever the floor of this alley is made from. He ponders on the present moment a little longer than he meant to, the shock of it all leaving him aimless for just a few, soothing moments of just, decompression. The night is quiet, vast, and cold, but the stresses of just the past 5 hours had left his body radiating with fiery aches and pains, so the chill of the occasional clawing breeze was welcomed. Except for when said breeze agitated the cold water still soaked into his sock. He should step in another puddle on his way back to even it out. The smell of rain still rested heavy in the air, heralding another storm on the horizon. There was that, and then, well, there was also the blood. The stench of it felt far too intense to just ignore it, the metallic miasma making itself maliciously unmistakable. Maybe the impending storm will wash this mess away... He looked forward to putting this unfortunate night behind him. With one last rattled, but deep breath, he stuffs his hands in his pockets, and turns away, strolling back over to the mailbox that Emizel had described.

He couldn't wait to get home and drink some soda with his friends.

#NO TAGS ON THIS ONE BC WELL. IM SHY. IM TAKING A BIG LEAP JUST BY ALLOWING U TO REBLOG THIS. IF IT BREAKS CONTAINMENT THATS UR FAULT.#i unfortunately suffer from the disease of 'i hate everything i write the day after i write it' BUT IM GETTING TREATED #I WILL NOT BE HAUNTED BY THIS WEAKNESS FOREVER. AND HEY LOOK THIS IS THE FIRST ACTUAL FIC BIT IVE EVER FINISHED..#ITS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!! AND BY JOBE I WILL BE PROUD EVEN IF I HATE IT.#i dont always need to be the one who likes my art bc i know Someone out there will always enjoy it.#and to that someone i say: omg thankyou i LOOOOVEE YOUUUUUU!!!!!#JUST DELETED A WHOLE RAMBLE I JUST HAD ABT NERVOUS DISCLAIMERS FOR MY ART BUT I DONT NEED EM!!#GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT. ANYWAY. so emizel and soda huh #THEYRE SO CUTE TOGEEHTERRRR TEEHEHEHEHEEEE they are the homies that kiss eachother goodnight like CMON #but uhh so hey your bestest friend in da world just got turned into a freaky creature thing that eats ppl #ieah yknowthe guy that u care about alot that u had to watch get bled out by another freaky creature thing in an alleyway #yeaaah and you were super hurt and weak and stupid and u couldnt do jack nor shit to help him #what was i talking about again. RIGHT so hes even cooler now bc he cant die n hes super strong n his arms can be knives. sometimes.#but also he can eat people now. and sometimes he cant stop himself from eating people. and thats kinda scary. but in a cool way.#but also in a disturbing way. but also in an interesting way?but also in a freaky way.the feelings ARE MIXED!!!ATLEAST I THINK THEY WOULD B #okay again i havnt listened to the suckening ina bit. so its been a minute since i absorbed their personalities. i could be misreading or #misremembering or misconstruing or mischaracterizing or WHATEVER. i think the confusion carries its intended effect #LOSING MY TRAIN O THOUGHT. anyway i love soda n emizel i hope they get locked in a saw trap together or somethign. for enrichment.#TALOS GRANT ME THE STRENGHT TO POST MY CREATIONS ON LINE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGHHH!!!!!!!

21 notes · View notes

rickyschicky · 10 months

Text

🌌Void🌌

A Ricky x Fem!Reader (Angst/Fluff)

Summary: You have been having an extremely hard time for a few weeks, but today was just the one day that topped them all... So Ricky had to step in before he lost you to yourself.

Warnings/Mentions: Depression, Drug usage (prescribed medications), self-deprecation, LOTS OF CRYING, Pet names (Squirt, Honey, Sweetie, Maomao, and Darling), very small amount of violence?

Hello everyone! I finally have completed my very first ZB1 fanfic and have truly become an official writer of Zumblr! This work has a lot of my emotions or feelings into it and was very self-indulgent when thought of. As many of my previous followers may have noticed, I’ve changed my user to “rickyschicky.” Yes, I’m going to mainly be writing about ZB1 from now on, but no I’ll still write for other groups/idols. But they most likely will be my ult biases or Idols that have a special place in my heart. This fic is coming out a lot later than I originally wanted it to due to a lot of personal things happening in my life. Now that this is released, I’ll be working on a proper pin that has a proper about me, rules for the blog, rules for asks and even an anon list for those who wish to SECRETLY stick around! Im very excited to have my fresh start, so perceive me well, pretty please! Feedback is always appreciated, and if you see mistakes don’t be afraid to send me a DM!

Cup. Pop. Gulp.

This routine was normal for you, a dreaded ritual if anything. If you didn’t do this every morning and night, you know your life would be in shambles and unlivable. Curling into your favorite (F/C) blanket, you let out a sigh of emptiness as your feet mindlessly kick around in it.

Managing depression, sucks.

Mindlessly watching whatever was playing on the tv, the heart inside of your chest sunk deeper and deeper. Yet anything you put on couldn’t entertain you, not even rewatching your favorite shows. You can’t decide what’s worse; not remembering how many days it’s been since this started, not eating or hydrating enough, or the fact that you have shut all your friends out with your boyfriend being the very next one. You hear your best friend’s custom ringtone blare though your phone speakers at least twice a day, but you couldn’t help but sigh and say, “not today, (F/N)”. Everything from blaring sounds to the soft fabric currently on your fingertips felt like it was hardly there. Your body feels like over-used putty, numb and worn out from so much usage. It’s impossible though, it has felt like you haven’t moved from this spot in months. Who knows the actual time you even were here on the couch of you and your lover’s shared house.

It’s pitiful how you couldn’t even jump from surprise when Ricky touches your head softly, “I’m home, squirt. I’m sorry I was out late, I wanted to finish getting a certain verse right.’ Only humming in response, you sit up and turn the tv down in an attempt to listen to him. By all means it wasn’t because you weren’t interested, it's far from that. It’s just hard to control your fuzzy mind and have it focus on something emotional at this moment in time. He didn’t like the lack-of response he received, gracefully walking over and sitting next to your cocooned form.

“(Y/N), honey. Please look at me.” You tear your gaze from the random spot you decided to zone out on and look into his gentle, cat shaped eyes. They were full of concern and distress. You almost hated how he could easily read you like an open book just by the way you act or look.

“Sweetie don’t start crying, I am far from mad at you. I just want you to talk to me, tell me what you feel.” Ricky takes no time in using his large thumb to brush away the tears that unknowingly fell from your lash line. He lets his long arms wrap around your figure, pulling you into his comforting lap.

The first thought you could even think of through the numerous tears was ‘why am I like this?’. Feeling disgusted with yourself, you choke out a sob harder and limply lay your head on his shoulder. You take your medicine day and night as prescribed, so why are you still feeling like a hollow doll that’s incapable of nothing? Even in the love of your life’s arms, you couldn’t feel an ounce of happiness.

Ricky sensed this, pulling your chin up and bringing you into a sweet and gentle kiss as he whispers soft praises of how strong you are. “Hey hey hey, don’t work yourself up too much (Y/N). We both know we will feel like shit, and I’ll call Hanbin to let him know I can’t come in to practice because you are just sooo sad.” He gives a cute pout, tickling your sides in mockery. Through your tears, you let out a huff that quickly turns into a squeal. You quickly throw your fists up and start lightly punching him in his wide shoulders and chest in an attempt to get his fingers away from your sensitive sides.

“The last thing I need is for you yelled at by mother, Shen Ricky.” You scold, feeling a breath of life flow through your veins. It was hard to be upset when he acts silly or in this case: say something utterly stupid and cute. He chuckles, noticing how you were starting to change right before his eyes. He knew he had to continue before you slip back.

“Well, I can always bring you to practice?”

“Ricky, WakeOne literally won’t let me, even if you beg.”

You sit in silence before just snorting at his antics. You shimmy out of the blanket and take care to put it around you and him, straddling his lap so you can lay your head on his collarbone right under his chin. Soon your body melts as you go limp once more. Ricky quickly accepted this new position by wrapping his arms around your lower back snugly, giving many annoying kisses to your temples and forehead. He felt you changing again and wanted to halt the process. Deciding this was too annoying right now, you attempt to pull the blanket above your head. Not liking this, your boyfriend quickly grabs the blanket with his teeth and starts tugging on it playfully, tickling your sides ferociously.

“What are you, a dog?”

“Actually, I’m a cat.”

You don’t waste a second to jab your hand in his side, hearing him whimper for you to let up and be gentle. He sighs, giving up and letting you hide under the soft fabric, rocking your curled up form that was on his lap. After being together for a while, he knew your limits and when to stop. You just wanted someone to physically be there for you today, so that’s what he will do. Slowly moving the blanket off the top of your head, he gently clears his throat to sing for you in his mother tongue. You voiced to him before you loved hearing him sing so comfortably in his first language and even encouraged him to teach you a few songs in Chinese.

Not soon after you were about to pull the blanket over your head, you heard his deep, breathy voice fill your ears. Stopping your current action, you tuck your hair behind your ears so you could hear him clearly (even if you couldn’t understand a single thing coming from his lips), and let your head lay heavy on his shoulder. Sure, Ricky could be a total annoying brat when he wanted to be, but times like this are when you are the most thankful for him. You felt at one of your lowest points and instead of running or simply saying, ‘suck it up’, he stuck around and tried to learn how to take care of you and cheer you up. He took his time learning your needs, favorite activities and foods, and even points of his personality you enjoyed the most. You were his rose, freshly bloomed and bright red with an addicting scent. His romance, the one that made his heart fall in his stomach and bounce of his rib cage with a simple stare and gentle laugh. If he could, you would be carried everywhere in his pocket wherever he traveled. Ricky truly loved you, just for who you are.

Not a second after he finished the song, you were wiping tears. You didn’t know what tears they really were at this point. You felt numb, but you at least felt something now compared to earlier. Sitting up carefully, you rub your raw puffy eyes to attempt to see him. Blinking rapidly, you saw he had a gentle smile on, your second favorite smile. Nothing could beat his largest, brightest smile he gives when he is bursting with happiness. Leaning over, you connect your sore lips with his thick, plush ones. Ricky’s chest rumbled smoothly under your hands that were propping you up, humming with the small show of affection.

“That’s my girl, so pretty even when she is the saddest soul on the planet.” He coos, large hands once again cupping your jaw tenderly. His eyes were sparkling, looking like the softest pieces of boba you have laid your own eyes on. Everything that exuded him at this moment spoke of love and truth. You lay your smaller hands ontop of his, enjoying the warmth of them.

“Maomao, let’s go to bed...I’m just really tired after today.” You confess, guilt laced in your voice. His thumb brushed your lip to hush you, smiling sweetly.

“There is nothing wrong with that, my darling. Let’s get some good rest and wake up to a new day. Together.” Your boyfriend promises, gently moving his hands to securely hold your thighs as he stands up and starts walking to your shared bedroom. He lays you down like royalty on the bed, swinging you in properly and tucks you in. By the time you were able to focus your eyes, he vanished from the room.

After a few minutes, you hear a familiar rattle come down the hallway as he slips in the room once again. He kneels by the bed a water in hand, and a yellow tinted bottle with a white cap on top. Sleepily, you grab the bottle and twist it open, smiling when you see the water bottle already opened and offered towards you.

Cup. Pop. Gulp.

Managing depression, sucks.

But Ricky makes it suck a lot less.

81 notes · View notes