The Important of Letting Your Children Set Boundaries-

-and how little things you will forget next week will change how they view you forever.

Completely incomplete and half assed vent post.

TWs: Mildly and emotionally abusive parents. Attempts at/fantasies of violence (i was like 9 what was i actually gonna do). NOT SA but many CSA survivors had similar things done to them so could ring some rusty bells. My most vivid childhood memories of my dad are of him hurting me, and the clearest of those (ignoring eye drops) being two times he acted like he didn't know. I don't remember anything from those days, not the dates or my outfits or how we even ended up as we did, except that he hurt me and laughed and made fun of me for crying and avoiding him afterwards.

Two crystal clear memories, fuzzed only by the fact I was so young that I'm not even sure of a number. The first one was in my bedroom, and frankly I think my mum might have been there. He was straddling me on my bed and tickling my stomach and underarms. I was crying and screaming and I actually managed to cut open his face with my chewed-blunt nails. He pinned my arms above my head when I did, and kept tickling me with the spare hand. The cuts scarred. You can still see them on his nose if you're close enough. He tried to guilt me about it the next day - I hadn't realised I cut him, and he must have reopened them washing his face. I pointed out he was bleeding and he sneered at me and said "that's cause SOMEONE scratched me last night". I didn't speak to him for the rest of the day.

The second, I was a little bit older. Old enough to have a general idea of a boy's body - I remember I tried to kick him between the legs when he got me down. He laughed at me and said he knew what I was trying to do, and I would never get it. He straddled me again, and was tickling me again. He remembered to hold my hands above my head. My little sister had gotten 'paint brush pens' (not like poscas, but thick plastic brushes with paint inside them) and had left the orange one lying around. He saw it and covered my face in orange spots. I always had sensitive skin. I carried those dots, but red, for nearly a week. I remember when he finally let me up, I ran right downstairs and locked myself in the bathroom. I didn't come out until dinnertime. I remember when I ran past my mum, who had stood in the kitchen just listening to me scream and him laugh, she told me he was just carrying on. If your child tries or manages to actually damage you when you're carrying on, stop. If your child starts crying when you're carrying on, stop. I almost can't have any physical touch with my dad or any genuine conversation with my mum without remembering these times. Physical touch as a whole provokes some primal fear. In primary I snapped at my friends for it and struggled to keep them. I rarely spoke to my 'best friend'. She is and was very physical. I get in low key fights every other day in the big school because younger boys have one joke, to paw at older girls. You don't get used to it. You get pushed bit by bit to your edge. I almost sent one down a flight of stairs on Wednesday, swinging him about by his reaching arm. I react with the same anger to my mum's attempts at hugging the daughter she let go when she dismissed that child's panic. I react with the same anger to my dad's attempts at reconnecting with the masculine 4yo he killed.

‏‎i love you mom 💕 #iloveyoumom #iloveyoumom❤️ #iloveyoumommy #iloveyoumomma #iloveyoumomdad #iloveyoudad #iloveyoudady #motherisday #sunday8may #iloveyou #lovestory #ilovemymom #ilovemydad #ilovemyfamily #ilovemyparents #parents #bigfamily #familyiseverything #familytime #familyfirst ‎‏ https://www.instagram.com/p/CecCvu7gDiz/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

ilovemyparents so muchhh

I 💙 Luv’n Ma 👨‍👩‍👧 Precious Most 🥳🪅💀👼🏻😃

#MyPrecious #ILoveMyParents #MyFamily #MommyAndDaddy #Love #Ailem #AnnemVeBabam #Happy #Mutlu

Ilovemyparents

I love Hometown cha cha cha very much, but there's one thing, not about the show but rather audience reactions that irked me a little.

When Dusik calls it a "biological crisis" to set HER mind at ease because he believes she was uncomfortable over her kissing someone she didn't want to kiss, most people said that he was "friendzoning" her as if it were something negative. Maybe they were joking I'm not sure.

Can I just point out that:

A)You can have feelings for someone and not want to be in a relationship

B)He didn't initiate the kiss, nor does he KNOW he has feelings for her, which means him telling her that it's absurd, is pretty reasonable following how he doesn't KNOW all the things he's done is because he is indeed in love with her. In his mind, it's completely platonic. And as I saw someone on Twitter mention, the villagers themselves assumed they were nothing romantic despite being gossip hogs, insinuating that his nosiness isn't anything new (though the audience know better ahem)

Maybe it's because I've been in this position, as have so many other people, but even if he'd been aware of his feelings, he's not obligated to reveal it to the person he likes; him convincing her that he didn't like her was so relatable and realistic (lmao)

And since we as the audience KNOW that he's completely oblivious to his feelings, him trying to set her mind at ease saying it's a mistake between friends isn't anything negative at all.

(Except ofc it prolongs their love line, but we love slow burn after all!)

Anyway today's Hometown Cha Cha Cha day, jealous Dusik, I can't wait!

Custom graphite drawing ♥️ Paid work, delivered to Dindigul ✈️ . . Time taken : 5 days ⏳ Size : 12 * 16 inches 📏 . . How's this? Comment below 👇🏻 . . #krishna5art #artist #artpublishers #artistssupportingartists#portraitgift #artistoninstagram #portraitdrawings #custommade #handmadegifts #art #giftforlove #ilovemyparents #trend #perfectgiftidea #dindigul #howsthis #graphitedrawing #commentbelow #thankyou (at Tamilnadu,India) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRF66wcssa9/?utm_medium=tumblr

Cause of them I am... 🥰 Happy 38th Anniversary Daddy & Mommy #relationshipgoals #mrandmrssmith #longevity #countryboy #islandgirl #iSmile #ilovemyparents #solid #Whenyoumakeitlastforever #blacklove❤❤❤❤❤❤😘 @flyawaysky https://www.instagram.com/p/CB50o4mhGrm/?igshid=yntrt6mnsllu

My parents are in bad condition with their health...prayers, frands, for family healing? I know God's plan is more accurate than mine, everything happens for a reason. 🙏 Praise God through the struggles. 🙌🏼 And share the Lord's power with good times!👍🏼 ~ ArtworxLegacy aka Danai Willis Martinez 💙 #prayer #praying #jesuschrist #christ #christianity #strength #god #health #healing #family #friends #godswill #love #ilovemyparents #mom #dad #Danai https://www.instagram.com/p/CA9SE0WJbw7/?igshid=4ph13czyw3y5

Last weekend my parents forced me to go over to my aunts house since we haven’t seen her and her family in four years.

That was the day I learned why.

Aunt: Oh so what do you want to be when you’re older?

Me: interior design maybe.

Uncle: That’s a rubbish degree. My friends daughter did that and she hasn’t gotten a job despite moving to Spain and other places in Europe.

At this point I seriously felt like ripping off their heads..

Uncle: You should become a pharmacist because you’re a girl.

Aunt: Yeah or a nurse. Very nice career for a woman.

Me: I don’t like medical stuff.

Aunt: *gasps* Kids these days are so disrespectful and they only stick with what they want.

My mum then looks at me in sympathy and stands up.

My mum: My daughter can be whoever she wants and if you can’t accept that you truly aren’t good people.

My dad: See this is the reason why we don’t come here. All we hear is gossip about people who you’re friendly with and really you two are just as much as a mess as everyone else. We shall be leaving now.

So we went home. It took us one hour to get there. Let’s just say we aren’t going there ever again.

One of the greatest titles in the world is parent, and one of the biggest blessings in the world is to have parents to call mom and dad. ~Jim DeMint~ . . #goodmorning #goodmorningpost #morningmessage #morning #parents #morningmotivation #blessings #parentslove #parentsupport #nature #parentsarethebest #alchemy #pets #ilovemyparents #loveyoudad #angels #loveyoumom #ilovemyfamily #dad #familyfirst #god #godsplan #mom #realization #consciousness #jimdemint #titles #myparents https://www.instagram.com/p/Bv-zeKTB4Or/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=90p5eeopmrud

‏‎➡️This is the first artwork, yes, the first artwork for the greatest and most beautiful woman in the world. She is my mother, your mother, and all the mothers of the world. They are the only support in our lives, They are the only bond in our lives. They support us and stay together for the last breath of their age... They are the angels on earth.♥️♥️♥️ ➡️ Link product in bio👕 #iloveyoumom #iloveyoumom❤️ #iloveyoumommy #iloveyoumomma #iloveyoumomdad #iloveyoudad #iloveyoudady #motherisday #sunday8may #familytime #familyfirst #familyiseverything #iloveyou #lovestory #bigfamily #ilovemydad #ilovemyfamily #ilovemyparents #parents #lorynpowell #wattsthesafeword #urmomapparel #tshirt #tshirts #tshirtlovers #tshirtprinting #tshirtdesign #tshirtfeminina #tshirtshopping #shoppingonline ‎‏ https://www.instagram.com/p/CeZw3TdDM1f/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

it's the fate

🐻🐧happy kaisoo day🐻🐧⌚

I 💙 Luv’n Ma 👨‍👩‍👧 Precious Most 🥳🪅💀👼🏻😃

#MyPrecious #ILoveMyParents #MyFamily #MommyAndDaddy #Love #Ailem #AnnemVeBabam #Happy #Mutlu

There is never enough time i made this For  my Dad who  passed on  your light forever shines

Just gotta give a lil love to the people that burfed me. Even though they got their quirks. I love these mooks 💕 #parentsbelike #ilovemyparents https://www.instagram.com/p/CX4nfCrL6ir/?utm_medium=tumblr