#idk how I’ll get through it
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the actual literal meaning of TARDIS (Time and Relative Dimension[s] in Space) is so funny cause it’s just…. a very succinct description of what the vehicle travels through? “hello i’m a human and this is my CAR (Concrete and Roads)” uh yeah i sure hope it do
#unrelated but i need to start writing otherstide cards for people#i’m about to go through a major life event but i kinda have some time to write letters in english and gallifreyan#i may do a little announcement about that at some point for anyone who wants a letter BUT first i need to know how much time i’ll have#but with my inbox complications getting addresses would be tricky and idk if ppl would be comfortable sharing them so…. ough. bah humbug#doctor who
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(this is a pls stop blaming juliette lewis for nat’s arc and death post <3)
#regardless of whether you loved the death or hated it YOU CAN STOP BLAMING JULIETTE NOW OKAY??#like even people who liked it overall but had qualms the party line is well I’m sure it was juliette leaving early so that’s why xyz#no! it was not! this was the plan <3 and idc if you hate love or nothing it I just think like making these excuses for things is weird#like do I get why some people might have assumed juliette might have left early sure yes but also idk like PEOPLE ARE FALLIBLE#showrunners are fallible! and that’s OKAY! they’re PEOPLE! and you CAN love every choice they make but jumping through hoops#to find *reasons* for the things you didn’t like is so interesting to me cause like…it’s okay!!! they can do a little thing you didn’t love!#you can even SAY you didn’t love it if you want and that’s okay too! or not! but stop blaming juliette lewis for whatever you didn’t like#also the rest of the article is an interesting read!#now I’ll do conjecture and tell you it is CONJECTURE for sure okay disclaimer#but after reading this article I think it is even possible Juliette’s anger with nats arc was partially BECAUSE she knew her death was soon#like maybe! who knows! not us! but I don’t even know how I became this hardcore juliette defender bc honestly I dosagree w her on a lot lol#but like I’ve seen people say oh she’s difficult and she made them do this and she’s a problem and she always does this#HELLO??? stop blaming women for shit baselessly??#(if you casually wondered if maybe she wanted to leave and didn’t say it like it was fact or use it to pin blame on her for stuff…#…this isn’t directed at you)#but some people got VICIOUS#juliette lewis#natalie scatorccio#yellowjackets
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oops all rock (springtime edition)
i’ll be able to draw digitally again soon! ;w; in the meantime i’ve been scribbling a lot on paper…
could not wait for Soon, so i resorted to coloring it using the markup tool in default iphone photos app (don’t do that ever again)
#my art#sos awl#debating whether to just dump my sketches from my soujourn to hell or save them to be transferred and finished as digital stuff#or like both idk. i don’t know how ppl feel about WIPs#i’m happy to post art again ;w; thank you everyone who welcomed me back i’m slowly getting through everything i missed while i was y’know#and thank you for the sweet messages while i was gone i am bbghkjh i need to calm myself and respond !!!! love#rock tumbling (sos)#story of seasons a wonderful life#bokumono#story of seasons#harvest moon#hm awl#harvest moon a wonderful life#bunny sighting 😳 i still have THOSE wips too#there’s certain things i wanna prioritize once i can use my tablet again and those are one of them#but i will also probably post new stuff alongside finishing old unfinished stuff….. i hope that is OK……#idk i’ll have to talk more later! right now i am nervous!!! i love you all!!!!#fanart#awl rock#bokujou monogatari#hm anwl#unfortunately this scum neet still has my entire heart so. most of the notebook is just him pulling goofy faces… sorry……..#also a lot of lumina and nami…. and molly…. they r really cool…#ceci is also cool and i’ve drawn a collage of her that i just. never posted#mostly drawing HMDS related stuff about the descendant characters#OK I’LL STOP TAGBLOGGING#i am once again back in DS for girl hell. i want to make a series of posts about differences in the English vs the Japanese version#and also fun secret things related to DS#this is all in the future i gotta finish all my unfinished stuff…. uuuu….#i love you all mmmmmwah (i cast sleepy time blanket and sleep forever)
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I can’t explain why, but this is my favorite hilson edit ever and I can/will watch it on loop for an uncountable amount of times
#hilson#house md#gregory house#james wilson#im very bummed about my laptop dying on me and possibly having to replace the motherboard#or put money aside to buy a new one in…who knows how long 🙃#so i was looking through my tiktok playlists since i can’t do my usual late night genealogy#and i saw my house folder and got hit with a burst of nostalgia#i had already saved this edit to my phone bc i loved it so much and would be devastated if it was deleted#idk maybe it’s the lake scene in the middle that pushes the brain buttons just right#but the whole vibe i get from it is immaculate and i wanted to share in an attempt to cheer myself up lol#maybe i’ll make a mega post of my fave fics too bc why not#it’s not like i can do my genealogy work 😞#hasan't#personal#video#not my video#tiktok#not my tiktok
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I have a mechs doodle request! can I have a jonny being a lil shit. talkin catlike behavior. sitting on the person who is least available to being sat on at the time, pushing things off tables for no reason, that kind of thing
This ask has been in my box for mmmm years. I am so very sorry haha
[ID: a drawing of Jonny d’Ville and Raphaella la Cognizi from the Mechanisms. Jonny is sleeping atop Raph, who is surprised by his presence and spills some liquid from a flask. \End ID
#I wanted to get through some of the really old asks in my box since there’s quite a lot#but it’s already getting late so idk how far I’ll get#the mechanisms#the mechs band#jonny dville#raphaella la cognizi#my art#ask box#I FORGOT JONNYS EYE MAKEUPPPPPPPPPP !#*cryinggggggggg
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the shorts :)
@even-if-in-another-time pspspsps this is for you new weekend plans just dropped <3
#shitpost#poll#idk how it will turn out#but worse case scenario I just go over it and stitch the words into place#maybe I’ll outline the bleached words anyway for fun#anyway I gotchu as the resident Does Things With Their Clothes Person#i forget exactly what you called me#but either way you can live vicariously through my sillies :3#i will follow the poll#whatever you all vote for I’ll bleach on the ass#these house shorts are getting an upgrade >:3
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why did my teachers think it was okay to give us like one single weekend to finish all of our midterm projects and study for our tests.
#slight vent#i have 3 projects and 3 tests#i’m halfway through my lit/history project and halfway through my psych project#and maybe a quarter done with my programming project#which is fucking insane btw cause how tf am i supposed to code a whole video game in like 3 days on top of everything else 😭😭😭#and some things he hasn’t taught us and just thinks that we should just be able to figure out like HELLO???/?///#I DONT HAVE TIME TO TEACH MYSELF NEW CODE#ITS THE MIDTERM/FINAL FOR THE CLASS??????#and once the weekend starts i’ll have no one to trouble shoot my stuff and fix my bugs so literally i’ll be hopeless so 😭😭😭#my calc teacher JUST finished teaching us everything we need for the midterm TODAY. THE MIDTERM IS ON WEDNESDAY. BRO.#my physics teacher doesn’t let us copy down any of our idk test questions or take our old assessments home to study#*old#so we get to look em over for like 20 mins and hand em back. which doesn’t exact fucking help me when i’m studying for the midterm.#WITH NO STUDY GUIDE.#my teachers even said that this years midterms are worse than previous years cause they’re all in a row instead of split by a weekend#we’ve had 2 delayed openings and 1 early dismissal this week which means we have less time to work on our midterm projects in class 😭😭😭😭#i’m so overwhelmed i’m gonna explode#by the time i finish these projects i’m not gonna have anymore energy/time to study for my tests. WHICH IS THE HARD SHIT BTW.
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sometimes I think about how Caine is canonically oblivious to the suffering that the humans trapped in the circus go through. Makes me wonder if he even understand the suffering if someone explained it to him because he’s just an AI, a robot with no soul and no understanding of how complex being human can be
#the amazing digital circus#hi tadc fandom as you can see I’m invested in how Caine is unaware of the suffering everyone goes through despite it being so obvious that-#Everyone wants to go home and to their human lives#does he understand why abstraction happens. He knows about it but does he know that the humans that have become abstracted have basically-#lost their minds because of the circus#and in the pilot he was making a fake exit for everyone and it makes me wonder a lot#the way he reacted when Pomni asked how to leave + him trying to make an exit but not finishing it becuz he supposedly didn’t know what-#to put on the other side on it. I kinda think he’s genuinely clueless on why everyone wants to leave so badly and just wants everyone to-#have fun at the circus but he’s a robot he doesn’t get it he’s confused but definitely trying his best to fulfill the constant request of-#an exit#Are you reading this? If you are. Hi.#How many tags does this have oh my god#anyways. Caine is canonically clueless on why everyone wants to go + oblivious to the pain. I think he’s genuinely unable to understand due#to being an AI but I could definitely be wrong since only the pilot is out so far#if I’m actually right then holy shit idk what I’ll do#danny speaks
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Im never gonna be normal about this i fucking knew it
#finished DE#it’s time to pace back and forth Thinking#I was already planning how to do a second run halfway through it is so over for me#im ggonna crew the drywall#CHEW#now I need to find the song that plays at the tribunal I’m so sad I didn’t have it turned on though the ending music also hits#wish I could just be pleased about it like a regular person or even just make a lot of fanart but no it’s time to#Feel like there’s three million bees in me#or ping pong balls maybe you get the idea#be prepared for me to make Something. idk what yet#dfugk man#can I even cook lunch rn.#all I wanna do is rotate these guys in the collage maker (GREAT btw) and run around and somehow achieve that at the same time#it was good though don’t get me wrong I’m just insane#I’ll think I’m probably not autistic just trying to be special and then shit like this happens like Yeah Man.#im gonna attempt to cook lunch I’m So strong
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starting to think maybe waking up with an anxiety stomachache every single morning and then needing to spend the entire day trying to get rid of said anxiety just to maybe have a few minutes in the evening of feeling relaxed before going to bed is perhaps not normal
#the first thing i do when i become conscious is check my phone to make sure nothing terrible happened to anyone i love while i slept#i never ever ever have plans and if anyone Else has plans i feel sick with anxiety until they’re back from them#if i have smth planned that week i feel completely tense and on edge until it happens#i didn’t used to be like this i hate hate hate it#i used to feel safe in my little house in the forest where i knew everyone in town and knew my way around with my eyes shut#it’s still the only place in the world i feel safe. that’s so unfair#my separation anxiety is ridiculous. if my mom goes to the store and doesn’t answer a text right away i start panicking#if my sister goes to a class or smth idk what to do with myself until she gets back#if i’m in the shower or have the fan on or headphones in suddenly i’ll think i hear someone shouting and i’ll have to quickly turn it off#ever since i moved here it’s been getting worse. i don’t feel safe here to begin with i feel so out of place it’s unreal#but then covid and trauma with my mother’s health and my uncle dying and multiple relatives getting sick and things happening to my friends#i know i have ptsd from very specific things that happened and i live on a hospital path so every day i hear sirens#and every time i do it fully triggers an anxiety attack in me for at least an hour. and my mom too#since being here my hometown burned and friends i thought would never grow apart did and my brother moved out#i know a lot of that is just Being In Your Low Twenties but also some of my worst trauma has happened in the last handful of years and now#now i’m just always scared. always uneasy. always worried. never fully relaxed. never feel fully safe. & idk how to be myself through that#i’m always paranoid and i never trust people irl anymore. ppl my mom or sister meet. i am so suspicious of them constantly.#if anything small changes at all i can’t handle it. my ability to deal with change has gone so downhill#in the last 5 years of being here i realised i was autistic which led to me unmasking a bit and that. comes with pros & cons doesn’t it#my own health has declined. my body changed a lot in ways i wasn’t prepared for and i had to get rid of most of my comfort clothes#sometimes i just wanna sit on the ground and cry about it and not have to also be the one that picks myself back up. y’know???#but at the very least i’d love to just wake up One Day w/o feeling sick with anxiety already. just one day i want to wake up feeling rested#i want to be myself again but can i start with not being scared? not being tired? i don’t know what to do anymore#i just watch my comfort videos and read my comfort fics and stay in my daydream world
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Honestly, considering the show/writers never acknowledged Daphne’s marital rape of her husband, and they only had a slight acknowledgment of Edwina’s feelings on Kate x Anthony, like I don’t think there will be a satisfactory resolution to Pen’s betrayal of the Bridgertons (Marina/Colin and Eloise/Theo) or of Eloise’s “friendship” with Cressida (and anything else she might do as “revenge”).
I think they’ll blow over the latter “I said I’d rather die than be her friend and I still mean it” and hugs all around or some other scene like that (which I know is simple and that’s my point). And Pen will apologize and confess that cause she’s so in love with Colin and she wanted to be noticed and she’ll be forgiven without much else from Colin. And maybe a little more for Eloise, if that.
(Spoiler’s for the books in case people care about that).
They forgive her for Whistledown in the books, Colin is worried more about her being revealed as Whistledown than her writing shit about him (tho nothing she writes is like Marina/Colin is not in the books. Daphne basically forgives her for anything she wrote about that but tbh she doesn’t seem to mind anyway). And, they like sorta acknowledge it as “wtf” thing, but it’s blown over quickly imo. “Oh well that’s nice dear” sorta reaction. And Eloise does have even more of a backbone than in the books but idk I just don’t see why and what people seem to want out of Bridgerton.
Eloise is going to somehow befriend and fall in love with Crane! You’re telling me the girl running around with Theo and “radicals” will suddenly fall for the guy boring the fuck out of Marina?
Like, I’m sorry but Bridgerton is pretty people hooking up with a regency background. They will not “do right” by most people’s standards of how the characters should act and how to apologize (Daphne and Simon make up after professing deep love in the rain! Anthony is shocked into confessing for real cause Kate fell of a horse! It’s for DRAMA, and then it’s resolved kinda easily?)
I’ve seen some more of nuanced takes against Pen, at least these people aren’t reducing her to a fat villain (cause when they did that I could not take them seriously 😒). And honestly a lot of it is fair, that’s good! The writers don’t care.
But now I keep seeing people hating Eloise to the point that they want a comeuppance that is not proportional to her “revenge”…and like… it won’t be as serious as y’all are making it to be. This “revenge”. Like please, the writers aren’t going to suddenly take this world seriously. See above and those are just 1 example for each season!
If they wanted to acknowledge all the hurt Pen put people through and make her work to become a better person, they could! I just don’t think they will because it’s 8 episodes per season and in this season they’re trying to find a way to get Colin and Pen together and Eloise and Pen as friends again by end of season. I don’t think they’ll extend a conflict into Ben’s season (I actually hope they don’t, I like Ben and Sophie’s story for the most part and while I love Anthony and Kate they shouldn’t be the focus either).
Idk what people expect I guess. if you’re watching it for Pen to be taken down a notch… might not be the season for you. If you’re hate watching I guess tag it with “anti” whatever and not the regular tags?
I’m sorry if you think she does not deserve an happy ending, I don’t necessarily disagree that she’s undeserving of some crow eating for what she’s done. However, I don’t think the writers care to make her go through that. And I don’t watch Bridgerton for brilliant character development that I think some of y’all want.
That being said I’m curious about how they’ll manage LW post Colin x Penelope marriage. In the books it basically disappears, and maybe they can use that to have a build up to Pen! However that means to me making their relationship last longer than as season and I do not want that for any of the couples.
#illy talks#I need to not go into tags but fine I’ll tag it#Bridgerton#sa cw#marital rape mention#rape mention#idk if I have a tag for that but I think I have it covered#I don’t write any analysis or meta cause I tend to be a centrist about everything and let the story play out#but I really relate to Pen’s wallflower ways so sorta defending her#but like also again the whole marketing of “Colin and Penelope’s story” sorta spoils it yknow she’s gonna be “rewarded”#and maybe she’ll get to have to work through her issues! I just don’t think they’ll have her do that cause it’s BRIDGERTON#she’s gonna “win” idk how else to say it (whether you believe she “deserves it” or not) in 8 episodes#hopefully the writers come up with a compelling story for her and Eloise and their friendship along with Pen/Colin romance but like y’all 😐#why are your expectations so high about a bodice ripper book turned tv show from the creator of Scandal and HTGAWM and Grey’s#like y’all know how it ends already…#again my fault for going in the tags#idk we’re getting four seasons minimum I just want to finish out with Ben and Sophie#if four is really all we get
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Not the stop clogging the Duke tag page getting ppl mad
#don’t clog the tag then idk what to tell u#I don’t even post that much on there it’s literally just the shit that bothers me scrolling through the Duke tag#it shouldn’t be that much#plus I’m being nice I’m not counting shit that’s wildly outta character equality#well I did once and the person was like but I DID mention Duke#it was a throwaway line about him teaching tim slang. let that sink in fr#and another person was like I post about Duke all the time#and I’ll admit my heart did hurt a lil#which actually all the time was like four posts so#but anyways I’m not looking at usernames#u used the Duke AND Oliver queen tags and all they did was ask questions about how crazy the rest of the fam is#questions as in two as one question each to start and end the hijinks#like I didn’t scroll through ur page and decide u were a Duke hater#I scrolled through the tag saw some bs and posted it#im not even saying ur racist I’m just saying don’t clog the tag#if Voltron was still big I’d be doing this for allura#and this is about Duke but Justice for Oliver in that post too#like being a non batfam dc fan is hard enough#at least Duke gets bat proximity#stanning CONNOR HAWKE? NATASHA IRONS? forget it 😭😭😭😭😭#oh in case I didn’t make it clear I finally did a draft dump from that blog 🤭
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It’s finally time for Magical Girl au yaaay! I’ve wanted to make one since I started watching Sailor Moon (& rewatched Magica Madoka) a couple months ago 🐙
I use the term Magical Girl loosely, but it doesn’t mean everyone has a skirt & highlighter color palette. Really it only means you get a cool outfit transformation & magic for fighting demons.
The breathing styles are like different forms of magical girls. Different divisions that Magical Girls train under I should say. (Aka if canon Slayer corps cared more about having strong highly trained members from the start instead of the final arc). The most popular/prevalent Breathing Styles have their own division (which is why Insect or Love doesn’t have one, since those were created recently and used only by one person)
There’s a bigger emphasis on teamwork (because that’s usually how the protagonists overpowers enemies that would definitely kill them otherwise) so just about every mission no matter your rank is with at least one other Slayer.
I also use “Division Leader” & “Hashira” often but don’t get them mixed up. Out of the Hashira, only about 4-5 have led their own divisions.
All Division Leaders are Hashira, but not all Hashira are Division Leaders if that makes sense.
Division Leader’s Estates are for housing (temporarily) and training of the lower ranks of their breathing style.
The non-Division Leader Hashira don’t have personal Estates. But because teamwork & friendship is important, they all share one Estate. Its the size of an average personal Estate, just split between the rest of the Hashira. It’s big enough for them to live comfortably without overcrowding each other
Out of the non-division leaders, Mitsuri, Uzui, Muichiro and Obanai share that estate. Shinobu stays with Kanae in the Butterfly Estate.
(The Kakushi are same as in canon)
Main divisions:
Magical Water Division, led by Giyuu & Sabito
Magical Wind Division, led by Sanemi
Magical Stone Division, led by Gyomei
Magical Flame Division, led by Kyojuro
Magical Flower Division, led by Kanae (yes she’s alive)
I know that Thunder Breathing was one of the original five, but I can’t find a suitable Leader or purpose for their Division. Zenitsu isn’t near powerful enough, Jigoro retired before the era of our current hashira. So I replaced their division slot with Flower because Kanae <3
As far as weapons go;
Every magical slayer has a sword and learns their respective breathing style, and each one of them has a specific ability/magic set.
I’m Introducing magic as a stand-in for the Pretty Guardians’ specialized attacks. (Like how Sailor Moon has ‘Moon Spiral Heart Attack’ that’s specialized to her usage only.)
In the au, Everyone has a Sword and their Breathing Style, but everyone’s magic abilities are different.
Sometimes you just need that extra slap to take out demons. This would definitely help when swords break mid fight. While magic alone isn’t enough to take out a demon, it can weaken them which could give slayers time to call for backup or retreat.
Also you pretty much sell your soul to become a Slayer
#kny#Magical Slayers ✨#did anyone get lost in that explanation ?#demon slayer#they beat the shit outta demons with the power of friendship & love#I mean that works in sailor moon at least why not here#demon slayers hold hands and Muzan crumbles instantly#not really idk how that fight would go in this au#SBDJHDKD nervous but I’m getting through this#I said it in my first post with this tag#& I’ll say it until someone agrees with me#Sabigiyuu have Uranus & Neptune relationship#they’re not just a pair they’re THE pair#giving away your soul for magic & revenge#that’s the Magica Madoka seeping into this au#you don’t even get a wish out of it#soul is infused with your brooch-like item#demons aim for that for the kill instead of the body#Ubuyashiki family 🤝 manipulation tactics to get traumatized vulnerable ppl to join the corps#I’ll get more into that later#more info on weapons & magic later#I’m not sure how close or far related am au has to be from the source material#a lil worried mine doesn’t hold much water but it makes me happy#f it I’m powering thru bc I’m excited about this au#kny au
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Last night I made a list of all the ways drinking has been negatively effecting me, my relationships, those around me, my body and mind, and my life as a whole recently.
There are 45 separate things listed on there so far
#it’s just .. idk how to go from a pint of vodka a night to nothing#if I try to taper or ween off I’ll just keep drinking too much#I can’t sleep without it anymore either even when I take like 300mg seroquel#literally need fuckin at least 8 drinks to even sleep anymore..#if I do get to sleep it will be like an hour before my sleep is disrupted#I’m fed up#and I don’t want to do this to myself anymore#but it’s so much easier said than done#I know if I continue on this path my body and mind will both continue to be damaged#and I know that if I don’t do something very soon I could end up drinking like this or worse for the rest of my life.#I want and deserve better than that#there is so much more to life than this#and I intend to experience as much of it as possible. without needing a substance to get through the day#ah#I don’t want to be like this anymore#but I really fear it’s too late to change or turn back#sorry lol a lot on my mind
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“I’ll be fine i just need to uhhhhhhh idk kill” but like…what if i did haha
#my stuff#dear diary and the several thousand mfs who can see it. Despite arguably good academic performance today feels like a bad day#bc i skipped lab to take a nap#and i feel lonely and incapable of connecting more than superficially with my classmates#like i can talk to them and i do and we get along well but i never…hang out w em#or at least not as much as they seem to without me#it’s not a malicious thing i think a huge part of it is groups of ppl living or working in the same space#and i’m in a different lab building than a lot of ppl#idk…struggling to find anything that sparks joy. unable to see the future with optimism#it’s just day after day of Job where i’ll beat myself up on weekends if i don’t do Even More Work#bc that’s the nature of grad school. always homework or literature review to do like i give a shit abt the latter#i don’t care what other people are doing i don’t wanna obsessively comb through journals to make sure i’m doing Brand New Shit#i want it to stop#i don’t want to read anymore. i don’t wanna have to worry about my job outside of work.#i want to cry and scream and#like i don’t wanna quit after i worked so hard to get here#i don’t wanna wuss out#but i’m always tired. i’m never rested or relaxed or truly enjoying myself#why is this only hard for me…how tf is everyone else able to read and remember and understand this much??#like yeah maybe i should be on adhd meds but those are fuckin spensive and a pain in the ass to get#i’m tired of being tough#i want to curl into a ball and be told it’s going to be okay and that i can rest and have it not be a lie or a half measure
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hi Princess
i hope you are doing well
please tell us a little about your new job with the doggies!
#here are a few pictures from today 🥰🫶#I have SO many pictures now it’s crazy#I should probably go through them cause I’m sure a lot of them are blurry but some are gems I must say#my favorite parts are probably when my yard is quiet and calm for a little bit (usually at night) and I sit down#and usually a bunch of them come rushing over to sit next to me#I can’t tell you how much I love it when a puppy lays on me or sits on my lap#it’s the best 🥰#there are definitely a few challenges to the job but I’m sure I’ll be able to deal#the hard part is it doesn’t give me enough hours and I don’t think it’ll be enough $$ either#so I’m gonna have to find another job which really really sucks#I’m already so exhausted with this one idk how I’m gonna juggle another one on top of it#but I need to figure out a way to get my own car and move out of my parents place#I love my parents so much but why can’t they just let me be me?#my friend literally said it sounds like they’re putting me on a leash and that’s EXACTLY what it feels like#not gonna get into it but it’s been rough lately#life hasn’t been the best so I’m sorry I’ve been so quiet lately#haven’t replied to anyone in awhile#but thankfully work has been good and I’ve been able to meet some amazing angels 🫶🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️#I just wish it paid better#also gotta figure out a way to wear my headset so it doesn’t trigger my migraines cause that’s been a struggle#really really REALLY hope one day I’m able to get my own puppy but at least for now I get to take care of other dogs 🥰🥰🥰🥰#ask#thanks for asking 🫶
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