xisuma is so funny conceptually. to Me. can you imagine spending hours working out in real actual life. have an electric guitar hobby. only to have everyone think your main character traits are pathetic and bitchless?? like.oh my god

it's been 84 years and like i'm still pissed/salty that peter used his moms connections when she was principal to plant drugs in sean's locker for the sole purpose to get him expelled and then lied about it and continued to be a sneak and then was only found out too late the after the fact. why was anyone surprised after what he pulled with many bc she didn't want him romantically so he posted her video online on his palm pilot like a pos!) he also got away with the whole thing with the street races like slap on the wrist when sean went down. peter pursued the race ok? he is just as guilty if not more guilty. a video apology? sean got beat like jail? i know he's not a rich guy but he didn't deserve that shit. ughhhh it makes me mad. sean like was supposed to graduate with his friends and be the first in his family to do so. it was important to him, and it's his fault that sean couldn't have that. it's peter's fault that sean had little options in town after that, so he had to leave all over again. sean is my favorite, he also was disrespectful and called him scum. (even tho s6 is my least favorite season for sean for a myriad of reasons AND I'm a semma shipper. whoever he was, wasn't sean ok?) peter is still worse. THE WOOOOORST. so basically f peter. this is my villain origin story. roses are red and violets are blue that storyline sucked, and peter stone also sucks. glad to be apart of this group.

my day was so awful that missing the bus to go home was just the last straw for me to break down crying

in my hater era

sometimes I wish I was a more interesting + charismatic person just so I could keep conversations going bc I like sharing space with other ppl but they routinely lose all interest and leave once I run out of things to say/start talking abt things that don't concern them :-(

UGH Why do so many songs I want to sing require a huge amount of charisma to pull off.

Are you French in the way Americans say they are Italian or Irish or are you actually French, because if it's the first one I'm sorry but you are actually not French and it's kinda a bit offensive of you (and of everyone who does it) to say so😭

First of all, no it's not. In any way whatsoever. No matter which way you swing it. God Europeans wanna be oppressed so fucking bad.

Second of all, hi, hello, you must be very new here because this is, like, day one orientation information, my name is Amélie, I am quite literally a card carrying can vote in elections if I so choose French citizen due to a French parent who has spent nearly every summer of her entire life in France, with my French family, who are the closest family members outside of my mom and my dad and my sister to the point where me and my sister and my French cousins almost view each other as siblings than cousins and French is literally my first language to the point where I was given an exception in my school's rules of "no freshmen taking AP classes" so that I could take AP French due to being French, which I mention quite often because I am and have the right to do so without getting the tone police on my case about my own life in my Frenchness on www.tumblr.com. So fuck you.

Third of all, it still wouldn't be offensive even if I wasn't a dual citizen closely tied to that part of my family and just had French relatives because it's not and the only people who think that are cunts. God Europeans wanna be oppressed so fucking bad! 😭

Wee Hour Sex Tho(ugh)ts cw

it really is like. tragic 2 be celibate when you don't want 2 be but also you're prohibitively socially phobic and living in the middle of (not-)fucking nowhere (with yr parent no less so it's just like. eternal child headspace. not actualized. definitely not sexy) and also you've been punting on the question of what ""post""-covid social interaction even looks like but you probably have to resolve that for yrself before you can do things that usually involve putting yr bare face on someone else's bare face

and also you can't really fuck somebody without like. having 2 be a person. which. see soc anx, above, but also like. wtf gender do i think i'm prepared to perform in bed. most options feel variously fake. really just want to like. lie down and be naked with somebody who wouldn't be put off by any of the possibilities so i could just. play around. feel it out (literally). also really i want to have known them for like. years already so i'd have any hope of not just performing Terrified Frozen Polite Eager-to-Please But-Too-Nervous-To-Be-Interesting-or-Admirable. blegh. basically just like. too many impossible criteria.

but unfortunately rubbing one out by yrself is just. not actually that fun. or like. i've been appreciating the distant second person (the only second person i've got!!) but. by myself i shd say bc maybe it is for you! but for me it's like. half the time my body doesn't even wake up properly unless there's somebody else there. also half the time i get lonely and/or sad afterwards when i'm by myself. need a buddy. :(

in conclusion yeah predictably i have been entertaining some glory hole fantasies but like. extremely obvious that for many reasons that scenario only actually fits the bill in fantasyland.

thought about amecan so much in the shower i literally threw up

Feeling like I want to give up again...

...What if I eventually picked up Vox...

one of the guys that runs a reaction channel i've been watching for ages just announced that they're ending the channel next year bc he got a job offer and he's getting married and he's thinking about his family and his future and like...

my son in christ you are 21

i literally want to fucking die

I haven't pre-ordered a game in... five years, at least? and am firmly against the practice overall. But that sad norse dad simulator... just hits different

v13.5 has given me the biggest love/hate relationship with rejuv that wasn't there when i first it played with v13 sorry

..."ok i'm gonna stop doomscrolling & focus on work"

except work today involves looking at cybersecurity guys' linkedin profiles to correct the bios they sent bc some asshole simply ran it through google translate instead of getting a proper translation into spanish or simply sending the original and asking us to do it...

and they keep posting the world's most rancid israel apologist / fanboy takes...... and the only pushback in their comments from other engineers is blatantly violently near cartoonishly antisemitic!