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#i was talking abt them to my family a minute ago
blackhairedjjun · 12 days
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it's you that i'd lie with. - c.yj
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pairing: choi yeonjun x gn reader | genre / tropes: angst, apocalypse au (no literally), the end of the world but make it slice of life, non-idol au, best friends to lovers, last-minute getting together (and i really mean last minute!!) | word count: 923 | warnings: implied death, natural disasters, mentioned existential crises, kissing, brief food mentions
part of my 300 followers event (event masterlist)
prompt - LAST: believing it to be their last chance to confess their feelings for the receiver, the sender tells them that they love them. (requested by @beomnoullitheorem - "I don't mind any kind of ending as I love both happy and sad endings, so I'm leaving it all upto you and I'm gonna love any of your work be it having any kind of ending!")
author's notes: hi noulli! unfortunately i don't have a copy of the stuff we talked abt for this prompt since i answered your asks privately, but i tried to remember what we said as best as i can! also i was in a very "wow i wanna kiss him sooooo bad" mood when i wrote this so uh. yeah sldkfskldjf. also the title is from "as the world caves in" by matt maltese!
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“do you really think the world will end today, y/n? like what the reporters said?”
you cast a glance up at the cloudless sky, its color a gradient of deep blue to pale yellow. meteor showers fall constantly like rain made of light. “well... if it isn’t ending, it’s putting on a hell of a show.”
yeonjun lets out a soft giggle and pulls you closer in his arms. you sigh happily and rest your head on his chest; his heartbeat is a bit faster than usual, though it is his last day on earth after all. you’ve always been touchy-feely with your best friend, but you’ve never been this close.
as soon as the news reports announced the end of the world a few weeks ago, the two of you instantly knew that you wanted to spend your last day here, at the open-air rooftop restaurant where you first met. you spent the next few weeks saying goodbye to your friends and family, checking a few things off your bucket list, and just... making peace with your life. today you and yeonjun claimed a table overlooking the deserted city below, though there wasn’t any competition anyway 一 the cooks and waitstaff had abandoned the place to spend their last day with their loved ones.
you lift your head up from yeonjun’s embrace to take in one last look at the sky, beautiful yet terrifying, a canvas of light and shadow. you wonder what everyone else is doing: maybe they too are looking at the sky, or maybe they can’t see it at all from the makeshift underground shelters they’ve gone to. maybe some are watching it alone, maybe others are watching it with a loved one, just like you.
just then you feel soft lips on the crown of your head, and you look up to see yeonjun pulling away from his brief kiss. he’s gazing at you with those warm brown eyes, and you can’t help the heat spreading across your cheeks.
“you’re quiet,” he says.
“so are you, jjunie.”
“it’s just... a lot.”
“i know.”
perhaps your brain is making you see things because this is the last time you’ll ever see him, but this is the most beautiful yeonjun has ever looked. strands of black hair fall over his eyes, and as you lift a hand to brush them aside you feel an ache in your heart.
“i was supposed to take you here again for your birthday, y’know,” he says with a small smile.
“really? you didn’t think i’d be sick of it here?”
“nah, you love it here. you’re always ordering their cheesecake.”
you laugh. “i mean, no one makes it like they d一”
just then the earth begins to shake and the whole building sways. yeonjun grabs onto you as you’re both thrown onto the ground. you bury your head in your friend’s chest and grip onto his hoodie; his own grip around your waist tightens and he curls around you. the table topples and nearly lands on your head, only for yeonjun to grab you and roll you away from the spot.
the ground beneath you rumbles, and you can hear the crashing of plates and bottles from the restaurant kitchen. tables and chairs are knocked over. you screw your eyes shut, yet the world doesn’t stop spinning...
and then an alarm starts blaring in the distance, and it’s over as soon as it started. you remain lying on the floor clinging to yeonjun, your knuckles trembling from your grip on his hoodie. he doesn’t move either, holding on to you so tightly as if you might slip away if he let go.
then you feel it again 一 that feather-light kiss on the crown of your head, lingering for longer this time. then another one, further down on your forehead. yeonjun pulls away to look at you, tears pooling in the corners of his eyes, and the ache in your heart gnaws at you even more.
“y/n, i...”
words leave him and the next thing you know, his lips are on yours. he tastes as sweet as you’ve imagined, and you wrap your arms around him to kiss him deeper. the world is spinning again, but for a completely different reason 一 with your body flush against his and his mouth moving roughly against yours, you feel as if every piece of you has been set alight.
you let out a sigh against his lips as he breaks away. he pants slightly, still holding you close, his eyes wide. 
“i love you.”
yeonjun is still breathless when he says it. had he said it on any other day, your mind would be full of questions: how long? since when? why are you telling me only now? what happens to us next?
but you don’t have time for questions. instead you lean towards him, meeting those beautiful eyes of his, and whisper, “i love you too.”
you leave a gentle peck on his lips, then another, then it’s his turn to kiss you back. next thing you know his hands are tangled in your hair and you melt into him completely, this new kiss slower than the first yet more desperate. in your last moments you’re going to love him the way you should have when you still had time.
neither of you notice the way the sky darkens to a complete black. the ground shakes again and you hold on to each other.
his warmth is the last thing you ever feel.
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celaenaeiln · 7 months
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lol hi its me 12 am anon so uh tldr is that i hung out with my friend and we got drunk and we made out or smth but more importantly they made w fuckin list of dick grayson things i started talking abt while drunk
- “bad idea right?” but its dick grayson and his exes
- bruce technically gave dick a family but dick’s the one who like truly made it feel like a family when it comes down to it he’ll fuck up bruce for his siblings
- that one “5 man band” trope and how he can fit as the leader and the heart
- into a specific (blank) to lovers? dick grayson’s got you covered
- the “barney from how i met your mother basketball hoop scene” and “eleanor from the good place mom she never had” but make it dick and bruce (teenage or adult idc i’d love both)
- nightwing could 100% be the figurehead of the dceu (like im talking spiderman level) if dc would do something [this was timed . i talked abt this for like 30 minutes all on its own]
i am . so embarrassed. also i dont know if we made out before or after the rant and i dont know which is more embarrassing .
what. what. "more importan-" NO! NO ARE YOU KIDDING ME THAT IS NOT MORE IMPORTANTLY OH MY GOD!!!
MY MIND IS LITERALLY BREAKING RIGHT NOW!
WHAT HAPPENED AFTER THAT? Do you like her? Did she say anything?! I-
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WAIT DOES THAT MEAN DICK GRAYSON LITERALLY GOT YOU TWO TOGETHER?!
NO WAIT!! SHE KISSED BACK. SHE KISSED BACK!
oh my god i'm reeling.
Have you guys talked about it yet?
I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS
I LITERALLY CAN'T THINK OF DICK GRAYSON RIGHT NOW AFTER THAT BOMB YOU DROPPED ON ME BUT FINE
"Bad idea right" was literally written for Dick Grayson!
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Nightwing (1996) Issue #133
"Bad idea right?"
Actually every single Olivia Rodrigo's songs feels like Dick wrote it.
Like the sour album? Every time I listen to it I imagine that Dick just wrote the album because he was so mad at bruce after being fired from Robin lol.
"bruce technically gave dick a family but dick’s the one who like truly made it feel like a family when it comes down to it he’ll fuck up bruce for his siblings"
That's true too!
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Batman (2011) Issue #11
"The truth is, I didn't save you from some dark fate, those years ago. You saved me from one."
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Batman (2011) Issue #11
"And you still are saving me, every day."
Bruce gave Dick security but Dick gave Bruce a life. He gave Bruce the ability to become human, to be happy.
Take Gotham War for example,
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Batman (2016) Issue #138
Bruce tells Jason he's saving Jason from himself and Jason in turn asks Bruce who's going to save Bruce from himself.
Cut immediately to -
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Batman (2016) Issue #138
Dick.
Dick has always been there to pull Bruce out of his darkest days when he tries or is willing but Bruce giving up on Dick's ability to do so is symbolic of him giving up on himself. It's the height of Bruce's irredeemability.
Even after Jason died, Bruce indirectly called Dick to come join him but at this point his back up personality is too far gone for him to recover.
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Batman: The Return
Dick literally is the reason Bruce stays connects to the batfamily. In a good way.
He has no reservations about keeping Bruce in check.
"that one “5 man band” trope and how he can fit as the leader and the heart"
5 man band trope: one leads, one contrasts, one thinks, one fights, and one keeps all of the above from killing one another
DAMN RIGHT
He's the leader.
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Batman: Gotham Nights (2020) Issue #12
And the one that keeps them all together
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Batman: Gotham Nights (2020) Issue #12
Dick is the defacto leader when Bruce is gone or lost it.
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Batman (2016) Issue #137
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Batman (2016) Issue #704
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Batman (2016) Issue #704
"Selina doesn't run Gotham. You do. While I'm away."
And the family's protector.
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Batman (2016) Issue #137
"into a specific (blank) to lovers? dick grayson’s got you covered"
Yup!
Canonical:
Childhood partner to lovers - Raya Vestri
Friends to lovers - Barbara Gordon
Enemies to lovers - Shawn Tsang
Psuedo-family to lovers - Helena Wayne (they actually married in Earth 2)
Crime fighting partner to lovers - Helena Bertenelli
Kiss at first sight to lovers - Koriand'r
Pseudo-therapist to lover - Bea Bennet
Landlord to lovers - Bridget Clancy
Teammates to lovers - Zatanna
X to lovers - literally him and everyone
He's just so shippable that way. Not gonna lie, literally all of his relationships Dick and his lover have been great together.
the “barney from how i met your mother basketball hoop scene” and “eleanor from the good place mom she never had” but make it dick and bruce (teenage or adult idc i’d love both)
youtube
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The New Teen Titans Issue #50
Man this hits hard. I've never seen how I met your mother but the parallels in the basketball hoop scene and Dick's talk with Bruce are uncanny.
The thing I think is weird about Dick and Bruce's relationship is that it's steeped in insecurities for each other. Dick feels hurt and betrayed and lost as to why Bruce would take in a new robin so suddenly and Bruce's tenure as Dick's robin is riddled with insecurities about him not being a good enough partner.
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Batman and Robin Eternal Issue #6
However it's because of these insecurities that I believe they are close.
The difference between Barney and his dad, from what I gather from the clip, is that his dad never acted like one to Barney.
But with Dick and Bruce? Bruce was a good dad to Dick. But he was a terrible partner. Bruce treated Dick like an equal while still fielding reservations about his age and dealing with his own insecurities. Bruce knows that what he's doing is not right but at the same time Dick is far too competent. His intelligence, his athletic skills, his compassion, and his fearlessness were light years beyond anyone Bruce had ever met and Bruce acklnowledges this.
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Batman and Robin, The Boy Wonder Issue #2
"The GAS was supposed to knock his OUT. His brain out to be sailing past the MOON, right now. What's this brat MADE out of?"
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Batman: The Widening Gyre Issue #1
Bruce's biggest problem with Dick is literally that he talks to much.
Dick is equal in every way to Batman and even exceeds him in some ways when he was Robin itself. So Bruce pushes the responsibilities of Batman's partner on to Dick while treating his as his son, mother, therapist, and partner. And Dick steps up to that. Soon they fall into a rhythm where Dick is Bruce's one for all human interaction. So imagine when you have a constant thing with someone that you're comfortable with and they suddenly start holding back from you. They begin talking about how you're too young to handle adult responsibilities. How you shouldn't be facing that burden. Now you're confused. Those responsibilities they are criticizing you for are the very ones that depended on you for. So now you start doubting yourself and trying harder and harder to make them see that you can handle the job. While you're struggling with confusion, they're struggling with guilt.
That is Bruce and Dick's relationship. Bruce grew a conscious after 10 years and Dick can't understand it. So there comes the self-blame and strife.
What Dick doesn't understand his Bruce feels guilty of his over reliance on Dick. Dick's self-blame has come to such a point that now even when Bruce in full honesty rants about how proud he is of Dick, Dick holds reservations because if Bruce was really proud then he would dump all the responsibilities on him right?
It's really messed up.
"nightwing could 100% be the figurehead of the dceu (like im talking spiderman level) if dc would do something [this was timed . i talked abt this for like 30 minutes all on its own]"
LOL
I think the Dawn of DC does have Dick be the figurehead or at least he will be in the future. We're just getting the beginning now.
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Nightwing (2016) Issue #100
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Nightwing (2016) Issue #100
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Nightwing (2016) Issue #100
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Nightwing (2016) Issue #100
"We want you to lead."
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Justice League (2011) Issue #51
It comes full circle.
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billsjum6ie · 6 months
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Tom with a daughter who’s literally his twin in the 2000s. Like this is present day and everyone talks abt how she is his reincarnation of him in the 2000s. he prob had her young if he passed on his old style to her but regardless the similarities are uncanny 😜 Thank uu
(Oh my god, that actually sounds so cute. I hope you like it! )
" She really is a younger you ! "
Dad!Tom
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He is really proud, if I'm honest
He's always flexing how much of an inspiration he is for his daughter, especially if he had her in a young age
Probably mentions this with every chance he gets, actually
Jokes aside tho, he'd be so pleased and happy with himself
The band had plenty of free time after their last show, so they decided to go over to Tom's house, drink some beers ( a dirty martini for Bill, please ) and watch some football. Before the match started, they were chatting about all kinds of things and , since Halloween was nearby , the talk switched to costumes pretty fast.
" I really liked your last year's costume, Bill. "
Georg said, taking a sip of his beer. Bill laughed, sitting back on the couch, throwing his one arm over the back.
"The Ariel one? I think so too! It was one of my best. "
He answered, taking a sip of his drink as well. He shrugged his shoulders.
" I don't think I've ever had a bad costume, to be honest. "
He added, making Tom roll his eyes.
" Of course you'd say that. "
Bill turned to look at him, a small smirk on his lips.
" it's not bad to speak the truth once in a while, you know. "
He answered, before turning to the TV again.
" my favorite costume is the one my daughter had when she was 10. "
Tom continued and everyone's attention was on him. It was Bill's turn to roll his eyes.
" of course, what else would it be? "
He commented, laughing a bit.
" I mean, why not? It was the time when she started experimenting with her style and all!"
Tom said before standing up. Gustav groaned.
" Here comes the photo album. "
He said, changing the channel.
" Hey! I was watching that! "
Bill said, annoyed, but Gustav chose to ignore him. Not many minutes had passed when Tom was back, a huge photo album in his hands.
" look! "
He said while sitting on the couch and opening it on his legs. The other three wanted to seem annoyed, since they've seen these pictures a million times before, but couldn't resist looking. Their smiles gave them away. They were actually so happy with Tom and his family. When he found the right picture, he pointed at it.
" I think it's obvious who was her inspiration for this look. "
He said, making everyone slightly laugh. It was a picture of his daughter, 3 years ago. She had on an oversized t-shirt and some jeans that were huge on her. They were basically touching the ground, while she was wearing some white sneakers. A beanie could be seen under her hat, that was almost covering her eyes entirely. In her hand she was holding a pumpkin bucket that said " Trick or treat! ". She had a small white guitar strapped on her body and from some videos they've seen ( a million times, again ) , they remembered the way she was walking like a penguin. But Tom couldn't help himself but remind them that.
" I remember that night as if it was yesterday. We were talking about her costume and what she wants to be and she just went " I want to look like you ". I didn't really think this through until she showed me a picture that she found in one of my photo albums of me from the early 00s."
He had a sweet smile on his face as he turned to look at the other three.
" of course we immediately went shopping and I got her exactly what she needed ! I remembered pretty well the whole preparation and on Halloween she was just a little me from the 00s walking around, like a penguin! "
He pointed at them.
" you guys liked that too, just admit it! "
He said, laughing, making everyone nodd.
" we actually did. It was so sweet! "
Bill said before they continued looking at the rest of the pictures.
From that one costume till today, his daughter started experimenting regarding her style
Slowly she became a mini 00s Tom overall, from her baggy clothes, to her taste in music and the obsession and love for playing the guitar, that slowly started to appear when she watched videos of her father on stage
Tom was always so supportive and happy with this change, even though it was something he never expected to happen, since times had changed and he thought his daughter would want to be part of every new fashion trend
But he always reminded her to not act the way he did when he was younger
Sometimes these conversations happened when they were joking around
Other times though, they were taken pretty seriously
" you know I love the way you found yourself in this style right? "
He once said while they were sitting on the couch, watching a movie. His daughter turned to him, nodding.
" of course. I remember how happiness was written all over your face when I first mentioned that I wanted to try this! "
She said,making them both laugh.
" yeah, that's one of my favorite moments of my life. It's really important to me, that you're so inspired by me. But you should be careful. "
His daughter immediately grew serious as she stopped the movie and turned to look at Tom.
" what do you mean, dad? "
She asked, and Tom sighed, leaving the bowl of popcorn on the table in front of them.
" I love the way you dress like me, and decided to learn to play the guitar, but never, ever act the way I did. "
He turned to her, his eyes looking right at hers.
" I wanted to live the life of a Rockstar. Smoking and drinking from a young age, having sex like there's no tomorrow, with different girls every time. I'm sure you've heard all of those stories already. "
The girl nodded, sitting back on the couch.
" Always take care of yourself and others. I know this may sound fun to a young person but it doesn't always have good outcomes. So please, be careful. And if anyone ever tries to give you a hard time, always come to me so we can fix things together. Okay? "
He said, but before she could answer.
" and if you ever try any of the things I mentioned, don't be scared to tell me. I won't be mad. Alright? "
His daughter gave him a smile and a nodd.
" I promise you dad, I'll be careful. "
Tom smiled back, hugging his daughter and giving her a slight kiss on the cheek.
" that's my girl. "
Let's just say he's always there for her (just wanted to add this here)
Other than that, the guys always point out how she is his " reincarnation " from the early 00s, just to see him beam with happiness
They always compliment the way he's teaching her stuff and how she grows up the right way with Tom as her father
And of course Tom always tries to act casual but in the end he fails
The boys were once again over at Tom's house. They were talking about the new album and what has to follow on the tour for its promotion, when their talk is interrupted by Tom's daughter who comes out of her room, ready to go for a walk.
" Dad, I'm leaving! "
Tom turned to look at her. As always, she was wearing an oversized white t-shirt and a grey sweatshirt jacket that went down to her knees. Her blue jeans were sagging and covering her white sneakers, while her head was covered by a beanie and a hat. Just like that Halloween costume.
" be careful ! Text me when you arrive at your friend's house okay? "
She turned to him and smiled, putting one earphone on.
" I will. Hope you have fun with the preparations! "
And with that, she was out the door.
" wow. She really is a younger you! "
Bill said, smiling at the door. Tom smiled too, looking back at the guys. His smile giving away how hard he was trying to hold back his bragging. Bill rolled his eyes.
" don't be so cocky! "
Tom just laughed at this, before giving his answer.
" yeah, she is. She even mentioned that she wants to get her hair done as a birthday present. "
Tom said, scribbling down at the piece of paper in front of him.
" which hairstyle did she choose? "
Georg asked, even though they all knew the answer. And Tom's smile gave it away before his lips did.
" dreadlocks. "
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rotdistressxox · 13 days
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DARLINGGGGG GUESS WHOS BACK FROM THE PYSCHE WARD!!
im currently brainrotting over agito as you can see..can you write how you think he would meet reader and how their relationship would develop into romance with him? like actually i sat at work for like 15 minutes trying to think how but i actually cannot cook anything up.
(Also I'm seeing the ghost stuff and I'm interested...gonna have to do research for dis one☝️)
sorry if i keep sending you silly asks😞
—🪡 anon
JOIN US WE HAVE SEXY POPES WHO DOUBLE AS FRONTMEN AND FREAKY GHOULS. Listen to them, I highly recommend listening to the meliora and prequelle album before delving any deeper. Watch some YouTube videos abt the lore. PLUS THEY HAVE LITTLE EPISODES <3
Time for some more Cakemaster 9000
Phew, this took a while
Kanoh Agito: How does he fall for you?
• Like what I mentioned in one of the headcanons, you work for Katahara. While Agito doesn't directly work for him apart from beint his representative fighter, he's technically his family AND The Fang.
• However, you two hardly see eachother when on the job. BUT-
• You two visit the same coffee shop. He loves his morning Latte, and you love (insert your favorite Cafe drink here)
• When you first started working, you were surprised to see the Kanoh Agito at a small coffee shop.
• He usually greets and addresses you formally, not interested in any small talk.
• "Sheesh, what a stick in the mud" It's not that he was trying to be rude, but he did come off a little condescending when he greeted you. (He has tone issues)
• One day you woke up late and didn't have time to stop and get your usual.
• He notices your absence. "They can't be sick, they showed no signs of it two days ago"
• Long story short, he picks up your order and goes looking for you. Once he finds you, he stiffly hands it to you. "You were late I presume. I picked this up for you"
• Everyone in the room was shocked. The cold hearted Fang buying someone a drink? You smiled warmly and looked into his eyes "Thank you, this was very kind of you"
• His breathing hitched, and he felt speechless. Was he....flustered? "Don't let it happen again, you work for the Chairman afterall"
• You obviously didn't let it happen again....buuuttt it was super sweet how he seemed to care about you enough to get you something.
• To return the favor, you arrived earlier and got him his Latte. Listen, he was speechless before, now he was in shock. He didn't show it though. In his lifetime no one had ever bought him anything or returned a favor. There was a first time for everything.
• You saw through his attempt to hide the baffled expression on his face. It was kinda- cute.
• "Why have you done this?" "Why not? I'm just repaying you" "I-" "Shush, just take the drink, it's burning my hand"
• He has to get there before you now to ensure that he sees you. He's a bit friendlier with the greetings, too. Don't expect a smile though, just a softer glance in your direction.
• When he was around you, he didn't feel like he needed to be The Fang of Metsudo. You didn't hold him to any higher standard when you chatted, you didn't bother holding back a few curses. He felt as if his soul was on Earth instead of hanging in the balance.
• On one of your off days, the two of you get coffee and sit down for once. Finally having a slower paced discussion. It lasted a few hours, you did most of the talking while he had a response to almost anything. There was a lot he didn't know about pop culture.
• Coffee dates became your thing, even though it wasn't technically a date. More like two friends hanging out. Discussions got into deeper topics like pasts and whatnot.
• Agito decided that he could trust you, so he opened up about the Human Gu Ritual. He didn't know what trauma was, so you explained to him that his feelings and memories about that time in his life would be very traumatic.
• "I'm glad you could tell me that, but are you okay? If I had something like that on my chest I'd cry" "I'm quite alright, I'm not fazed in the slightest but I had no idea the caliber of the topic. I hope I didn't ruin the conversation"
• You tapped your cheek and sighed. "Have you ever been hugged before?" Agito thought for a second. The embracing gesture? The only physical contact he's hand was a pat on the shoulder or when he's fighting.
• "No, I don't think I have" "Well today's your lucky day, bring it in"
• He froze as you wrapped your arms around his waist, pulling him into you. His heartbeat raced as he thought of what to do. "Just tell me if you don't like it" you squeezed him gently. He awkwardly put his hand behind your back and rested it there.
• You let go after a few seconds, but he didn't want you to. "How was it?" You smiled.
• "I'm not sure" He smoothed out his suit, trying to relax himself after what just happened.
• A few days passed and you haven't seen him anywhere. He wasn't at work or at the coffee shop. You start to worry. Did you drive him away? Was the hug too much? Oh god was he dead?
• All the while Agito was keeping an eye on you from afar. Not letting you see him, but he could see you. He felt very fragile after that day, he almost felt ashamed. He wasn't good at managing his emotions. And what happened moved him in a way that frightened him.
• He summons the courage to talk to Katahara Metsudo about how he felt. He was the only parental figure he had in a sense.
• "You are a grown man. Is this really a difficult concept to grasp?" Katahara looked out the window of his office. "I'm inexperienced, these feelings are foreign to me"
• 'He's not referring to himself as we and us anymore, this must be serious' Katahara turned around. "To put it simply" he laughed "Tell (Reader) everything you told me"
• "I have a strong regard for you" Agito came clean. You know how I said there was a first time for everything? Well he had a hint of red on his cheeks. This beast of a man, blushing? Utterly adorable
• "So you're saying you love me?" That's the word. Love. He nodded. "Well. Say it then. There's nothing holding you back"
• He pauses for a moment, he's not exactly fond of eye contact. But this was for (Reader)
• "I love you"
• You wrap your arms around his waist again. "That's all I needed to hear"
• His lips curled into a smile as he looked down at you. You parted from the hug and tilted your head to the side. "Wanna go out to a restaurant sometime?"
• "Are you asking me out on...what is it that they call it...a date?" "Yes" you stated bluntly. Beating around the bush or teasing wouldn't get far in this situation.
• "We can talk about plans later, I have important matters to attend to" he look your hand and grazed his lips on you knuckles. Planting a small kiss on it.
• "Now where did you learn that?" "It's a romantic gesture they do on television" you bite your lip from calling him a dork.
• "I'll meet with you later about this date. Until we see eachother again" He leaves, and you're alone again.
• Man, you're already falling for him. It's not like you'd hate dating him. But you didn't want to be head over heels just yet. You looked at your knuckles and sighed "Ah what the hell, being love isn't that bad"
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soldier-poet-king · 1 month
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Will my suffering never cease
- went to good Friday evening service even tho it's not a day of obligation, didn't go yesterday evening to Maundy Thursday for a variety of reasons
- priest manages to fit homophobia and transphobia into his sermon. Not even gay marriage. Just unions, that let ppl share taxes and have hospital visiting rights. And big bad scary surgery. Like. Completely unrelated to the matter at hand. Says SO LITTLE abt the Passion, managed to talk for 10 minutes without really saying ANYTHING. Takes Pilate's 'what is truth' and instead of engaging in the long philosophical and theological discussion around that question, decides to use it as a rallying cry against wokeism and a godless progressive society.
- my two ex best friends were there. Ran into them. + One's husband, who I introduced her to a decade ago. Like I'm mostly over that, no longer shitty and resentful, fully know that it was partially my fault and born from my own terribleness at 19 and undiagnosed untreated mental illness. Still uhhh hurts tho??? As a reminder?
- music bad. Ok I'm petty. I'll give the trads (1) point. I don't like guitar mass. I will NOT agree with the trads in assigning moral weight to my aesthetic preference. It's simply a preference, which does not make any musical form inherently superior to the others. But the triduum really lends itself to Latin hymns and chants, in my heart. My other fave church music is traditional Black spirituals. I would greatly prefer either. But just. If it sounds like an acoustic version of a pop love song. I just. I can't. I KNOW I'm the weird about Jesus romantically girlie. But I am not vibin with this folks
Literally would have simply Walked Out. Hit da bricks during the homily. But was with my family so 1) cannot out myself 2) did not have house keys on me, so I was suck regardless
Anyway I said I wasn't going to do fun things today but I'm so upset and cranky and I did chores all day, I am going to catch up on dungeon meshi. Marcille is my best favourite cringefail girl I'm obsessed with her and surely the wlw neurotic fussy mage who loves her friends will not betray me like this
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petefromarma · 2 months
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Dont get me wrong but that course of events you laid out sounds like a mostly good thing? Gabe saying anything even kinda resembling an apology is already better than the Absolutely Nothing I was expecting
i’m putting this under a cut as it’s long
yeah i mean i do think them donating to a relief org would be the absolute best thing possible bc like as of rn nothing abt this is materially helping palestinians. it’s all just noise which honestly i probably shouldn’t be contributing to bc i always knew this was going to happen and i’ve always known what pete and gabe are like. i’ve also always known what the other three are like but pete and gabe are the only ones who have done and said things prior to this incident (other than being silent) irt palestine that warranted outright criticism. anyway my main problem rn is w gabe’s statement.
the reason i’m unimpressed w it is bc i feel like it’s smth either he or an intern paraphrased in like two minutes (again, always knew this was going to be the response if any), and doesn’t address what the majority of the problem was imo, which was that he was parroting blood libel propaganda put out by the israeli govt re oct 7th. i haven’t gone and looked at the post myself recently, only seen screenshots of his comments, so idk if he took that part down, but that to me is the greatest issue. i never had a problem w him mourning the civilian casualties/hostages of oct 7th.
like addressing the discontent at all IS a good thing but i don’t believe his comment covers anything that he actually needed to apologize for and i’ve already seen teenage westerners who clearly learned abt palestine for the first time like. five months ago. trying to speak on this situation with authority that is not earned and not deserved.
and i’d like to be clear and say that i don’t believe all or even most blunders re saying something ignorant online require a full apology; i think that in most cases, deleting whatever was said is enough. i don’t think pile ons or bullying are conducive to rehabilitation or a change in behavior. however, to me, this is a special situation in which i believe a full retraction is necessary bc as i said before, he was spreading israeli govt propaganda.
none of what he said was new to me either. i know he’s the descendant of holocaust survivors, and more than that, i know his family had to flee europe and later uruguay. i know that like many jewish families do, his parents kept a box in their home in nyc filled with their passports and valuables in case they needed to get out of the country in a hurry; he needs to realize that this and so much worse is the reality that palestinins are living every single day.
the israeli govt preys upon and exploits the generational trauma of jewish individuals/families/communities in order to sow fear, terrorize palestinians, and further the colonization of palestinian land; i have complete understanding of how he’s been radicalized to this point, but it doesn’t excuse what he’s said and done and i think the only real way of fixing this is putting his money where his mouth is and making a public donation. again i’m not demanding anything of him, i’m not saying this will or won’t happen, i’m just saying what i think SHOULD be done and what would be the most effective from a harm reduction standpoint. can he come back from being radicalized to the point he was/is? i don’t know. i’d like to think so. all i know is that that statement didn’t address what i think it should have addressed IF it was supposed to be considered at all meaningful and i think the way ppl have been reacting to it is inappropriate.
anyway, sidebar bc i’m going to attempt to stop talking about this after this post and go back to focusing on initiatives that actually benefit ppl in palestine rn, but i think fans (who are not palestinian) who were shocked by this were living in a fantasy world and i think the way those fans esp those on twt have reacted toward meredith has been abhorrent. as i said a lot of this has just been noise rather than any action that is meaningful in any way and i think that while we should be realistic abt what we are going to get from them we should also be able to acknowledge where any actions of theirs are lacking.
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ashtray-girl · 1 year
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Sorry if i'm bothering you but i really wanted to rant abt Johnny and Moz and hear some of your thoughts about these two certain topics that i can't get out of my head:  
I find it incredibly weird that Johnny and Morrissey (as far as we know) never became friends again or never tried to reconcile their relationship after the breakup - like how do you go from being best friends and hanging out with each other 24/7 to "We haven’t known each other for 35 years - which is many lifetimes ago." as Morrissey said on that letter. The strangest part to me is that, since the break up and to this day both Johnny and Moz never hesitate to mention again and again how much their relationship meant to them in the band and how much they loved each other during that period of their lives - i mean the way they describe each other and the words that they use come straight up from a romance novel. Also the fact that Morrissey continued to write songs abt how much Johnny meant to him and like Johnny getting that swallow tattoo on his neck and other weird stuff like why care to mention each other so much and make everything so dramatic when you - as you claim - haven't known each other for a lifetime? And idk on a personal level if it would be me in their situation i would at some point try to fix whatever we had if we obv meant that much to each other after all these years.
In all honestly when i read abt Marrissey Johnny sometimes just comes off as someone who suffered (and maybe still does) from internalised homophobia, when you read the way Moz talks abt him in his lyrics it definitely gives off that vibe "Though she needs you More than she loves you " , "Love is natural and real But not for such as you and I" or "I am born to hang but not to have kids and to never be wed - no, to someone whom I don't even love" and that interview when Moz said that "That perhaps Johnny Marr was in fact madly in love with me, but didn't feel he could act on that - or that he didn't have the courage to ever take it any further?'" And i don't want to seem like i'm trying to bash Angie or anything but i find they way the got married pretty weird and almost rushed in way like would they even get married if Joe Moss hadn't insisted that they do? Even Andy thought it was weird "They got married in some evangelical church. It was pretty bizarre. There were only about 10 of us there, including the crew. The ceremony only lasted about 15 minutes. I was a witness. Afterwards they hired a function room in the hotel and we had champagne and a buffet. It was a nice day, but it was just weird. It didn't seem real. You know what it's like in America - everything's plastic and phoney. It just didn't seem like a proper wedding. No relatives were there."
Anyway sorry for the long rant!! I just wanted to say that i absolutely love your Marrissey ramblings, Have a nice day :)
Hi anon! don't worry you're not bothering me at all, i'm always down to talk abt marrissey haha i'll just have to reply w/2 separate parts bc there's so much i want to say lmao 1. i've been chatting to @loathsome-tonight abt this (comparing notes, so to speak) and both of us agree that the "no-contact" situation after The Smiths' breakup is essentially bullshit, and for quite a few reasons: - first of all, there's proof they were exchanging notes around the time Morrissey was recording Viva Hate - when Johnny Rogan first published his book Morrissey and Marr: The Severed Alliance Morrissey predictably wanted no part in it, and Johnny only got involved bc he felt pressured by the author getting a bit too close to his friends and family. however, once the book came out Johnny apparently felt compelled to call Morrissey and reassure him abt the extent and the reasons of his involvement - when Morrissey released The Last of the Famous International Playboys, Johnny apparently sent him a note to congratulate him on its success - if you've read Morrissey's Autobio, you'll know he sent Johnny a letter in 1992, to which Johnny replied telling him he was sorry for everything that happened and taking "full responsibility". they then met each other and went for a drive on the moors - after that meeting, their relationship seemed to improve. in a 1993 interview for Select, Johnny said: "the relationship between me and Morrissey is the best in the group, of the four of us. i still see him now. i called him last night. last time i saw him was a couple of days before he went to do his recent album. we let a bored media get the better of us, but there's always been a certain telepathy between us even when we didn't see each other. we played a game with the press and they played with us, but it's not true life. no, we're friends." - then, the trial happened. and that's when things went south again between them. being interviewed with Bernard Sumner for The Face in july 1996, and being asked if he and Morrissey were still friends, Johnny said: "not... (pregnant pause) not particularly... [...] if i'm too glib then people think i'm being disrespectful and if i'm too serious they think there's a reconciliation on the cards. i just don't have any feelings about it." except a month earlier, once again being interviewed with Bernard Sumner (for the NME this time) he was playing quite a different tune. asked if he was still in contact with Morrissey, he said: "occasionally. last time we met it was a really nice experience. it was really good to see him, especially since a... a feud that didn't really exist had become public property. and because of the relationship we had it was time to resolve it in private and do something ourselves because it was really quite a serious situation. i was tired of being involved in other people's games and i wanted to do something for us. [...] i know it's interesting for other people, but it's kinda private. i certainly don't wish him - or anyone i've worked with - ill. life's too short." whatever happened between them at that time, it seems like 1996 was quite a turbulent year for their relationship... - years after (seemingly) going their separate ways, in 2008, they met once again. this time in person, in a pub in Manchester. apparently they even talked abt a potential Smiths' reunion, but Johnny already had other engagements with The Cribs, so nothing was done abt it - in recent years, Johnny also mentioned exchanging emails with Morrissey so even tho i highly doubt they're still in contact now, there was definitely a time when they were on speaking terms, even after The Smiths broke up. however, it seems like their relationship was quite volatile and hot and cold, with them being fine one moment and being snarky the next. personally, i've found it surprising how none of the biographers/journos that wrote abt them directly challenged them on this, bc ultimately it's very easily disprovable.
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watermelonsugacry · 11 months
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OK I HAVE SO MANY THINGS I WANNA TALK 2 U ABOUT SO HERE IS ME RANTING AND PUTTING QUESTIONS:
I lovehe relationship yn has w the tomlinsons😫 like how she has a secrete handshake with the twins and how lottie is like her little sister and LOUIS IS LITERALLY A DREAM FRIENDSHIP
I have this thing where i like to think that yn was a big fan of paramore, and she also wrote some hits like only exeption (it just screams her and also it reminds me of how she would feel abt harry)
I also see her writing 'girl crush' when harry and taylor were dating and then saling it in 2014 but idk thats just me
And am i the only one who sees a PERFERT friendship between her and jennifer lawrence??
OK NOW I GOT SOME QUESTIONS SO HOPE THEY'RE NOT TOO MUCH
Whats the readers networth? Like i know that shes rich but how rich🤔
On a scale of 1-10 how famous is she? Like comparing to a big celebrity like Beyonce is she just as famous or..?
Whats her favorite colour?
Who is more clingy, harry or her?
Besides harry and louis who is her bestfriend that she hangs out w the most
What are some celebrities that got a crush on her and who has made that public
The weeknd has a song 'the party & after party' and it kind of sounds that hes describing a girl like yn "with your louis v bag, tats on your arms, high heels shoes make you 6 feet tall.." so are there some speculations ab this from the fans?
AND LAST is the reader the teaser in the relationship or does harry like to make fun of her more? ( srry if theres any mistakes)
IM ALWAYS DOWN FOR THIS LOVIE 💚
same!! they're family 🥰
funny enough, i actually picture a lot of paramore's music to be the music that yn would make with her band when she was in high school!
in the 1d!yn universe, she wrote Girl Crush!! (I remember talking about it a while ago on here but I forgot what year she wrote & sold it lol)
I don't know much about jennifer lawrence but thats an interesting pair 👀
I'll base it off of ariana grande's net worth at 240 million. But we all know that no number can amount to her actual worth 💅
I'd say that on a scale of 1-10, she's about an 8. She's a household name and an absolute force to be reckoned with. She's the type of famous that she forgets that she is and she'll record herself reacting to tiktoks lying down in bed, make-up free, and just lose her mind laughing. Or there was another time when she took herself out on a brunch date bc Harry went out to play golf that morning. Two girls approached her table and politely greeted her, said how much they loved her and had tickets to see her show that night. But before they could leave, YN invited them to sit with her and spent the rest of the morning eating and chatting with them.
Her favorite color is lavender 💜
Harry is the more clingy of the two! He's always the one who lays himself on top of her when she's about to get out of bed. When they arrive at the stadium he's going to perform at, her hand is constantly intertwined with his. When she's doing some last-minute rehearsals and sound checks, he's sitting at the edge of the room as he watches her work while still giving her her space. Or when she's in her home studio, he insists that she sits in his lap as she works because he's missed her all day, promising that he won't be a distraction to her (even though he totally is). And don't get it twisted, she can be clingy too sometimes; she's just better at hiding it.
Her other good friends that she hangs out with whenever she can are: Abel (the weeknd), Perrie Edwards, and Alisha Davies (an old friend from Doncaster turned choreographer).
oh my gosh where do I even begin?! There's a couple that initially come to mind: Matt Healy, Alex Turner, and Taron Egerton. For some reason, I can hear Matt say in an interview: "YN YLN is totally fit. Yeah, she's a fucking babe she is."
OOO definitely! Fans from both fan bases had speculated that they might have dated in 2017 (they didn't) bc that's when they hung out in public for the first time. Some people still speculate that Abel might have a crush on her til this day.
I'd say they share the teasing role. She throws playful jabs at him left and right, but she's the one who helped coax out that side of him. While they tease one another behind closed doors ALL the time, their favorite time to make fun of each other is at each other's shows.
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HELLO. ITS BEEN A MINUTE!!!
soooo basically i cant sleep. and so i figured id come to you and ask you to tell me abt your ocs (again)
pretty pleaseeeeeeee <3
HELLO YEAH IT HAS
okay okay im kinda tired right now but i have a new idea for a story and thats what im gonna be talking about :3 yada yada eight great knights gifted powers from the gods, those powers are then passed down through generations so each generation has its own pair of eight knights, the eight families as descendants of the original great knights are held in high regard
a few generations ago the eighth knight at the time sorta. dissapeared (fucked off to live a life of freedom and raise their family without putting any pressure on their future kids) so since then that family has been. lost. like as far as anyone knows the power has still been passed down but. well. yeah im tired and my brain is jumbled suishsuskajsjsj but the gist of it is theres supposed to be eight knights protecting each generation but for the past few generations theres only been seven
the other characters i currently have nothing for BUT!!! mavi/mavis (they/it/xe) is the current inheritor of the eight knights power. agender aroace icon, constantly looks like it took a year long nap in the forest and just clawed xer way out, smug bastard. i adore them and thats all i can say rn because. again, jumbled brain. OH YEAH ALSO THEY HAVE WINGS
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bloopdydooooo · 12 days
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i'm asking you abt your version of hamlet but you have to ask me about wtnv ghosts OR kris dreemurr, deal?
for this, i will ask you about both.
(it got too long i hid it under the read more)
ANYWAYS i had a breakthrough like. ten minutes ago cause i was thinking about how i'd put a spin on hamlet. cause i was talking w my director for romeo & juliet a while back and he said how important it is in shakespeare to have something that makes your production just a little special a little unique so people will keep coming to see it. if it's the same plays over and over presented w the same contexts and worlds and everything, no one will want to see it. (i mean i would but i'm. uh. abnormal). and i've been agonizing over what my spin on hamlet would be, were i to direct it (an idea which has taken control of my brain and will not let me go. this has become my dream in life and i'm literally an actor not a director). point is i found it.
i was thinking about Shitty College Kids hamlet and then i was suddenly struck w the passing thought of crime family. and then it kept coming back. and i think i might be a genius. hear me out:
hamlet's family, the royal family of denmark, is actually a crime family. gertrude may be the one who technically runs the show but really she's a mob wife she doesn't exactly make use of her power, instead letting her husband do it. her husband claudius, who has hamlet sr. killed and then marries his sister in law (the kind of wild bullshit i can imagine happening in a mafia movie, of which i have watched none (but will for research)) so he can take control of the family business. it adds a darker, grittier level to basically everything in the play; taking them from high society – royalty, even – to a shady crime family, and fits perfectly with my vision of the play: i crave violence in hamlet, and i think he deserves some blood and gore. its enrichment for him. with a modern take we can give him a gun to kill polonius with, shooting him through something more significant than a curtain (i wouldn't do a mirror obviously but hamlet (2009) i fucking love you for that) and the stakes are all heightened when bullets get involved. plus it really pushes the whole bit where hamlet is sent off to england (and would, i guess, be someone else's territory?), because in this everyone would know he was going to his death. there would be no naivety, no shock horror when he says he was sent to his doom, just people standing by and watching as this kid is sentenced to death. 5.2 is a knife fight, quick and dirty and scrappy – none of the class of a rapier duel – and it raises the stakes a lot. there are rules and regulations in swordfighting, not so much in a rage fueled knife fight. hamlet, in the end, stabs his uncle with either his or laertes' blade but im thinking his. there is no poison it is just a brutal, bloody slaughter. it gives me the darkness and violence i've been hungering for but were harder to push for in the context of a castle, of high society. they still have the power, the influence, but they're taken to a place where i can have all the grit my heart desires without it feeling out of place.
it also makes relationships between characters so much more interesting. hamlet, for example, is still a scholar, a highly emotional college kid who talks in flowery prose and has a passion for theater, but now he's supposed to be inheriting the Family Business and not a kingdom, where all his gayboy bullshit wouldn't be very out of place. it pushes him further as an outsider, as someone that people would turn against, would throw to the wolves. who does that make horatio? hamlet's friend from school, maybe tangentially related to the family but only really through hamlet? how about ophelia? daughter of the councilor to the 'king', is she actually someone that they would want hamlet to marry? and what to make of laertes, who seems to abandon denmark for france? he comes back and is almost instantly accepted back into the inner circle despite having requested leave and happily departed, is claudius gunning for him to take hamlet's place as next in line? rosencrantz and guildenstern? clearly hamlet's friends from within the business they're also at his university, did they follow him there or did they all happen to find themselves in the same place? we're there greased palms to get them in? what about hamlet? and gertrude! the family line ascends through her, it must or claudius wouldn't need to marry her to get the power, but she shows no real desire to exercise it, even when her son is in danger. what's her deal, what's her story? she must have one, she's a fascinating person.
tl;dr the version of hamlet i've been craving is apparently a mob boss au. and you know what? it's awesome.
also. consider the costuming opportunities. they are infinite, and they are fabulous.
i have so many more thoughts but sadly it is 3am and they will not all form properly so i will leave it at this
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icharchivist · 3 months
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hiii icha!!! i'm ~finally~ going through the greatest journey, so here's ask #1 of... well, at least two. this covers chs 1-9 bc I thought it might be easier to chunk my thoughts this way! it's been 3 years since I've gotten into a3... let's call this my incredible stamina and patience and not. that i'm bad at doing things.
anyways. i knew vaguely that guy was like, kind of emotionaless but the moment i saw [ALL SYSTEMS ONLINE] i gasped like hello!!! robots!!! android in his case to be specific... this makes a clockwork heart make even more sense. izumi and citron actually explicitly bring this up--that luke & s's friendship reminds citron of him and guy. particularly the stuff about having different statuses. i think it's interesting that this is what citron highlights, rather than the fact that like, s is a homunculus and guy is an android, and both of them have their own struggles in understanding humans and human emotions. but the fact that citron isolates the status as the biggest divide between them rather than the android thing is SUCH a good encapsulation of like. how citron feels about guy i presume as well as the themes of a clockwork heart itself. since that play is reflective of tsuzuru's feelings regarding mizuno, it's not really their differences that hamper their actual sense of like friendship in a perfect world? it's the larger society and culture that forces them apart. which i imagine is a large part of what makes citron and guy's relationship strange--guy is his attendant. thinking on it now, S was created by luke... I wonder if, in a similar way guy was (or at least feels as if he's been) created For citron. that'd make things feel complicated. i also have to wonder if guy's Actually a robot... like shutdown switch, sure, but other than that he seems like he could be human just fine.
let's see, what else happened... OH RIGHT!!! i started talking abt guy and completely forgot that i nailed it in terms of calling citron a runaway prince!!! it was quite obvious at this point, really... but I'm glad I was right, anyways! I'm really glad we're getting this story, because we get to see a bit more muted and serious side of citron, which has always been there, but never really at the forefront, I feel? and like. it's really good. citron introduces guy as his attendant with a pleasant smile and doesn't betray any kind of tears at the thought of his upcoming coronation. he gets chikage to spirit him away under the guise of his fun little wishes. he tells masumi to let him have a 10 minute romantic walk with izumi so he can just have 1-on-1 time to confide with her. literally he didn't flirt one bit.
...and while I, you know, don't think masumi has to "allow" anything, it is sweet that masumi's like. o..... kay. and accepts citron's request. but it makes a lot of sense--right now, he's seeing citron leave, like he was going to leave not so long ago. only while his situation seemed hopeless, citron's just Is hopeless. i mean, not entirely, but a dad is different than a country's government, as izumi says. she also mentions, when guy first shows up, that citron, unlike masumi, seems like he's accepted the situation.... but in one like his, can he do anything except for accept it?
speaking of characters i feel like tsuzuru in particular is going through it a little. especially with that clockwork heart competition and the repetition of the manzai (where citron says “You are the best partner, Tsuzuru”) it's like... citron's cheered up tsuzuru quite a few times? and now he's like, gone, and tsuzuru's got to work through a script on a tight deadline without really knowing what to do. spring is family and i think not having citron around is gonna hit everyone really really really hard, but it's gonna hit spring the most. (side note: i think someone, maybe tsuzuru, was like, let's give citron an even BIGGER part as the king in alex in wonderland!! my funny answer for why citron left was that he was protesting against this indignity)
the voice acting's been so great, of course. you can literally hear citrons voice tremble in joy and sadness when he’s telling guy that theatre is fun. and then he implies guy can't feel, and judging by what guy himself states, he at least believes that to be true. that human emotions are beyond him. to which i want to say... GET HOMARE AT THIS GUY!!!!! and then i remembered... wait, despite the focus on spring, this is winter troupe!! we ARE throwing homare at this guy!!! I'm really excited for winter drama as always, you know.
speaking of winter drama, it was SO NICE to get that payoff from nocturnality!! tasuku visiting azuma's old house with him was just so dearly attentive... i love him. azuma having to ask "we’re…. Friends…?" was so real of him though. YEAH, YOU ARE. YOU GUYS JUST MADE MARRIAGE VOWS!!! and even though azuma wore himself out from that experience, I'm glad he was able to find that present from his brother. i really liked how like. feminine the present was, too. very suitable for azuma. also very heartbreaking bc here, from his brother, it's just a sweet comment on the fact that he thinks its nice for azuma to have his hair long, and the reason azuma keeps it long nowadays is because of his brother, in a way... it was good that tasuku carried him back, and good that he went, even if he got so worn out. I'm glad guy got to act and also glad azuma realized just how passionate he is about acting.
back to main plot stuff, citron tells izumi, “for reasons I cannot say, I was forced to sneak out of the country on my own. I could not tell even Guy of this.” this, to me, says that there's stuff regarding zafra that citron knows and guy doesn't. whatever this is, I have to imagine it's why citron forces guy to stay behind. I think he also wants him to experience the magic of Mankai. because he cares about guy, and wants him to be treated well--and citron probably doesn't think that having guy serve as his attendant means he's being treated well.
also THE CHARM!!! "...It is a very special gift that I received from someone." <- that's what he said in the new years new beginnings event to omi... I wonder if guy made that for him? my longshot theory is that guy maybe like, has fragmented memories of some kind? and that's some of what's impacting his relationship with citron. though idk if they'd do something like that since hisoka's got all that amnesia stuff going on with him already... we'll see. (maybe I'm just too affected by citron saying “Please, Izumi… Do not forget me.”) but speaking of treasured things it's genuinely so sweet that citron joined mankai and was like. oh. this. this is worth all the remaining time i have left before my coronation. there's no other experience I'd rank above this one.
other notes: the "your crown, king" from itaru is so good. localization for a3 stays winning! speaking of itaru i love how chikage comes back after citron's disappearance and itaru immediatley clocks that something's up. probably chikage didn't want to hide it, but I think some of it is that chikage's just not as good of a liar anymore.
also if one needs to know the language for zafra… both chikage and hisoka are pretty good at that kind of thing. they're also the type of people who could break into a palace if necessary. just saying!! i'm so excited for what's next...
OMG HIIIII IT'S BEEN A WHILE!!! NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN!!
It's always a pleasure to see your in depth thought <333 and of course it may take some time, but, like, as long as you're having fun it's what really matters, don't you think!
under cut
AND HELL YEAAAAH here's to the reveal. and i'm so glad you immediately connected it back to Clockwork Heart becayse yes!!! yes!!! this is why Citron was so involved into it and this is why he framed it the way he did. All he could think about was Guy in this specific scenario!! And yeah the focus on class especially is an interesting framing from Citron on that regard. I hope you'll like where this is going!
AND HELL YEAAAAHHH!! Three years of hearing you say "i think he's a runaway prince" and just nodding along like hahaha whaaaat craaazyy…… but yeah it was pretty obvious, but i'm so glad you picked it up as quickly as you did. And you're right, while this side of Citron has always been abit present, we really end up seeing him drop the charade for a bit now. Like it really shows how his whole carefree act was, well, a bit of an act, and now that he's actively trying to set pieces on a board to disappear from the company you really see how calculating he can be and how he can weaponize the way he presents himself to get his way. I find it soo interesting. Citron is a fascinating character.
felt about Masumi also, and, yeah, at this point literally everyone in the Spring Troupe except Tsuzuru and Sakuya tried to leave the company lmao, but it was nice to see Masumi in particular react to that considering he's the one who almost left a couple chapters beforehand. It's interesting, as you point out, how Masumi and Citron's situation end up working as parallel to one another, with different stakes and obligations that still make them different enough, while also both chapter still feed on one another.
god yeah for Tsuzuru. Like i think Tsuzuru is always kinda worn thin by his troupen but like, a good way, in a very "big brother who's watching over his loveable but hyperactive little brothers and he doesn't have a minute to think about how much he loves them because NO STOP CHEWING THE TABLE--". And Citron in particular was always keeping him on his toes so Tsuzuru never really had a moment to pause and realize that he's going to miss him a lot and that while Citron was always stiring him along on other things, Citron was always there to cheer him up and find ways for him to work through his issues. It's really effective with Citron leaving, to see how Tsuzuru has to come to term with all of this all of the sudden.
the voice acting is always on point but god yeah. Citron sounds so heartbroken about leaving stuff…. DLKJFDKLFJDLKF IMMEDIATELY GOING "HOMARE CAN FIX IT" until then remembering Guy is a Winter character is so funny though. They ARE going to throw Homare at this guy. That's the price for being a Winter chapter BABYYYYY. We love winter drama in here so i can't wait to see your reactions once it starts happening <3
TASUAZU SCENE TASUAZU SCENE!!! oh my god i cried so hard the first time i read through this part it broke me. yes, the pay off from Nocturnality is UNREAL. this was really the moment i thought "ok so basically you can't read Winter chapters without having read their events more than any other troupes holy shit." And i just… i love how Azuma kept it together during this scene because he's so used to live with his grief, and Tasuku was there in case Azuma broke, but Azuma was sure he wasn't going to. But finding the gift was just a renewal of this grief. Azuma kept his hair long because he thought to himself that maybe his brother would come back if he did, and in a way, a piece of his brother did come back on the way he took care of his hair. It was a new thing adding to his grief and Tasuku was there to help him through it and it was so emotional i just. god i love them. And yeah, seeing Tasuku carry Azuma back home, and Azuma being able to see just how much he loves theater afterward, was just so heartfelt. I also love that like… Tasuku was never great with words, and as a result in the early days he was bad at giving proper support, but now it's not like he got better with words, but he shows his support in little, other ways. and it's just so sweet to see it unfold there.
As for what you point out with the main plot, all i can say is tee hee :) but i love your reasoning so far, you always have good takes.
AND THE CHARM. YEAH. THE PAY OFF TO THAT. i still can't believe just how hard the events build for this chapter like holy shit. Loving your thoughts so far though :3c But god yes Citron thinking Mankai is worth all of the time he had left just makes me want to cry too. He really ended up finding a sweet family there.
"You dropped this" "your crown, king" is still the greatest, most surreal dialogue in a3 i'll never recover. We lost so much the day we lost the a3 english server. I do think Chikage didn't want to hide it, i think also Chikage is lowering his guard around them enough they can clock he's lying, but also i think Itaru became very good at reading Chikage as well - from one liar to the other. So all of this combined, and Itaru knowing the type of person Citron is (like, Itaru had a few serious convo with Citron in the past already - like when his ankle got twisted and only Citron noticed and tried to really talk him into relying on them -- it was one of the rare time Citron's mask dropped and i think Itaru is smart enough to figure out that now that Citron's princely mask is on, that Citron is up to something and stuff).
AND HELP. Yeah we can rely on Chikage and Hisoka now, which makes Spring/Winter combo very useful on this one. Our shady people who will help us with our runaway prince situation <333
As for the rest, i'm leaving it up to you to discover! can't wait to see your reactions when you get there, but it was already a fantastic read!
as always thank you so much for sharing your thoughts <3333
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chronologer · 8 months
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🤥🌈🔥❤️📏👻for the oc ask game! Any oc, I’d love to hear about them!
hehehehe >:3 it’s oc posting time!!! i have many more ocs now and i am v happy to talk abt them, so ty for the opportunity!! i’ve been swamped with stuff so sorry this took like….. over two months haha! <3333
so first a little rundown of four of my new ocs!!!!!!
first i’ve got reynie!! (he/him)
reynie got reincarnated into a book he had read when he was younger but also not really???
the book that he thinks he got reincarnated in was a story about these two siblings discovering this hidden magical world after staying with their distant relatives over the summer
and he got reincarnated as their older brother but again. not really. i’ll get into it later.
but for now he’s desperate not to ruin things bc of his presence
i’ve been on a bit of an isekai/reincarnation kick lately so this is largely inspired by those concepts haha
then there’s the boy (he/him, but eventually she/her(?) <— i decided to trans her gender like… ten minutes ago so my thoughts abt this r kinda incoherent rn,,, but she finds out she’s a she/her over the course of the story, but i’ll use he/him to refer to her sometimes to indicate that those moments are specifically before her big gender realization)
she’s a sad, depressed, overworked high school student who is so lonely she unintentionally ends up creating a ghost/god/cryptid/monster/???????
then the monster is. v angry abt being created then abandoned. so she gets terrorized by them.
she doesn’t have a name bc i honestly just couldn’t think of one haha. calling her ‘the boy’ for now bc it’s what she thinks she is,, but her lack of a name parallels the monster’s lack of a name too so it all works out in the end 👍
and the monster (she/her at first but then eventually they/them <— they were created to essentially be a mirror of the boy’s innermost desires n stuff, so she’s a she/her at first, but then they like…. slowly branch out from that and become their own person and get their own pronouns (?) or smth?? idk.)
they’re the monster that the boy accidentally created. and even though the boy didn’t realize she created the monster, the monster is still angry so they’ve hatched this whole plot to torment her
and plot twist!! they gets attached and the two become weirdly codependent n overall just have. kind of a weird thing going on.
is it platonic? is it romantic? is it familial? idk but it’s definitely kinda fucked up!!
and finally there’s labyrinth (no pronouns??? idk……. they/them for now)
they’re also from a world where there is secretly supernatural shenanigans, but labyrinth has magic powers so they get recruited to go to this boarding school in like… massachusetts or smth, but they couldn’t care less.
as in it literally could not care less. it is physically impossible for them to care about anything bc they are like. two steps away from being fully catatonic at all times. and is also almost completely incapable of forming new memories
yeah they’re like totally dissociating at all times.
(it’s bc they have so much grief over the past that they cannot let go of it and cannot participate in the present)
but they gets better with the help of their very good roomie daniel. yeah 👍
also doesn’t have a name. also bc i didn’t wanna think of one. but smth smth it emphasizes their disconnect to the world and their life, blah blah blah plays into the themes n narratives smth along those lines.
tbh im not supppperrr happy w how i’ve characterized labyrinth??? so i might end up changing everything abt their personality. idk.
so now…. onto the ask game!
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reynie is pretty decent at lying, largely out of necessity. he’s trying to hide his knowledge of the plot as much as possible, so once he figures out he’s in a book he starts lying as much as possible so people don’t find out that he knows the future. and he gets away w it, not bc he’s like… a master of lying, but moreso bc his family has no reason to think that he’s lying so they don’t suspect him of anything.
the boy is,,,… okay at lying... she’s good at the things that matter to her, but she’s bad at lying to anyone who knows her well enough, or when taking to certain topics. but also she lies all the time sooo idk.
the monster is the Liar™. biggest liar in the world and also the greatest. if there was a lying contest, they would win it. they are the most gaslighting lying faker of all time. but also tbh it’s lowkey kinda omnipotent and sometimes changes reality so the lie is no longer a lie??? still loves lying tho, especially to the boy to like. psychologically torture her.
labyrinth doesn’t lie. like. at all. tbh they really don’t understand the concept of lying. well, they do, but they don’t really see the need for it?? idk how to explain it. ig they’re not really present enough to lie. sure, that makes sense if you squint really hard. 👍
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tbh it depends on what time they are in each of the stories and all bc they r all very different at the end of each of their stories than at the beginning.
for reynie…. hmmm….. he’d probably tell his younger self to not ignore the crippling migraines that he gets and also pay wayyyyy more attention to his dreams. like… get a dream journal or smth. (it’s bc he can see the future in them) also he’d definitely just tell his younger self a complete list of everything that goes wrong and how to fix it
(although this would inevitably end up making other things go wrong and probably worse but reynie would be too obsessed with fixing things to realize this fact)
the boy would probably tell her younger self to not apply to the fancy boarding school bc it’ll murder his health. or maybe she would tell him to apply bc it led to the monster being created??? tbh i think she regrets every decision she made that led her to the monster but after all’s said and done she wouldn’t change any of it. She’d probably tell her younger self that it’ll all work out in the end.
wait actually nvm all that she’d tell him what snacks to buy at the grocery store for the best price-to-flavor ratio. yeah. 👍
the monster would… uhhhh… kinda be the same ig???? idk they might try to speed the whole love-hate-overall-just-weird thing they have with the boy along by telling their younger self that the boy’s actually lowkey kinda funkalicious. groovy mcgroovical. coolio. and that they should maybe not psychologically torture her and pretend to be a ghost n all. or not. they’re whimsical like that.
labyrinth would only give their younger self advice after they start actually moving on from the past and become more present, but it wouldn’t really do anything bc younger labyrinth would not hear any of the advice at all. so it really doesn’t matter what the advice is bc both labyrinths know it wouldn’t change anything. i think they’d just hang out together and braid their past self’s hair :]
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hahahhahahhahahahhahhah self destructive tendencies…… hahah hahaaha where do i begin….
reynie….. martyr complex + imposter syndrome + hates being vulnerable so will never reveal anything to anyone ever + huge perfectionist riddled by anxiety so he’s terrified of changing the plot (and doesn’t realize that his very existence has changed things) + has no regard for his own health and safety. overall just really self destructive, especially later on when he realizes that he no longer knows the plot of the story bc he’s inadvertently changed too much, making him,,,, kinda unhinged????
the boy’s mentally ill af!!!! she has crippling anxiety abt everything, which that and combined with her fear of being vulnerable causes her to be very lonely and have no support system to help. she will not reach out for help even if she needs it, which is lowkey the root of all her problems, especially the monster, since they were literally created bc the boy wanted a friend/support system so bad she ended up accidentally making one. also,,, super duper closeted and repressed.
the monster is just kinda of a huge asshole tbh which gets in the way of them forming any genuine human connections. they also hold grudges for ages and ages even when said grudges are completely unjustified, so they get so focused on revenge that it’s difficult for them to grow past it. plus they’ve got a god complex but they kinda are one??? so it’s maybe a bit justified.
labyrinth is literally so overwhelmed by their own grief over the past that they are physically unable to interact with the present most of the time. they can’t even remember their dad’s name most of the time bc they cannot process the present and their current life. they’ve got a lot of trauma and unresolved issues but they’re subconsciously repressing it and refusing to move forward which…. really screws them up…..
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had to search up what all the love languages were bc i forgor lol
i’m not super sure abt any these?????? so they’re all liable to change at any given moment lol
reynie likes to do acts of service/give affirmations, and he likes to receive quality time (not that he’ll ever ask for it…)
the boy likes both giving and receiving physical touch and quality time
the monster likes giving gifts and quality time, and is above having human desires like a preferred love language to receive (it’s quality time and words of affirmation.)
uhhhh it’s kinda hard to know labyrinth’s love language??? i think they like giving gifts, and receiving… quality time??? i don’t think they care abt receiving tbh….
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reynie’s pretty educated. in his past life he went to college, and in his current life he’s a high school student again, although he’s mainly just cruisin’. he was pursuing more advanced education outside of school, reteaching himself what he learned in college through self-study, but then he found out abt how he got reincarnated into a book and the existence of the supernatural, which caused most of those plans to be put on hold.
the boy goes to some fancy schmancy boarding school for smarty farty kids, although she’s not doing great there, although that’s more of an executive disfunction/the school’s way of teaching isn’t the way that works for the boy/unrealized neurodivergence/etc. type of thing. but she’s still getting a funky education.
the monster’s is super educated but that’s cause they’re omnipotent and omnipresent, so they literally do know everything (at least most of the time [when they feel like it]). they also go to the same school of the boy, but it’s not to be educated, it’s to screw with her.
labyrinth is…. okay???? they do well on tests n all that bc of,,,,, reasons??? but they actually know anything. they’re currently going to the magic boarding school in massachusetts or whatever.
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ok so tbh…. they all live in worlds were ghosts are real (or could be real in the case of the boy and the monster) so tldr; yes.
reynie, once he learns abt the supernatural, absolutely believes in ghosts, although that’s largely bc he knows for sure that they exist cause they were in the book. i’m actually planning on having him become a ghost hunter later on, bc he’s going to go on a road trip to do supernatural stuff for plot reasons, and he’ll do ghost hunting stuff for cash (this entire part of his storyline was created when i finally got phasmaphobia a while back haha)
the boy and the monster,,,, uh technically the monster is a ghost??? kind of…. it’s like if god were a ghost but also a building and the boy’s future n past self,,,… it’s complicated. but the monster also gaslights the boy into thinking that they’re the ghost of some dead student from the 60s. the boy definitely believes in ghosts tho, while the monster doesn’t, or at the very least they know that ghosts aren’t naturallly occurring in the world.
labyrinth believes in ghosts, but only bc they were taught abt them in their magic massachusetts school. that’s abt it. they were told ghosts were real, n just kinda went along w it.
thanks for reading and thanks for the ask!!!! i’ll probably end up making some more posts that explain these ocs more, and introduce some of my other ones sometime soon!!!!!!! hopefully…… i also want to draw my ocs soon too but my brain just won’t let me :( sigh….
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notcolleen · 1 year
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tw for very rambling suicidal ideation behind this, i promise i am safe 👌 (but blunt talk about death and rambles abt cats and mentions of pokémon 👌)
[[MORE]]
but i have not been this actively suicidal for extended amount of time probably ever, yet i say that knowing that i will stay alive indefinitely……..just really really really sad all the time 😌 (so please know that too and allow me to write this out lol)
it’s just a very overwhelming sense of staying alive out of obligation and that’s not exactly what dbt would call a Life Worth Living
but i am obligated to my cat first and foremost (as ridiculous as that might sound to some but i know others will understand lol) and to my family as well, and the guilt of leaving them overwhelms me even though i know logically i wouldn’t be alive to feel it….like i look at phoebe (the cat in question for those who don’t know) and i see a wonderful animal who didn’t sign up to be taken in by a severely depressed human — she deserves unconditional care and love and that is what i agreed to when i adopted her so that is why i am obligated to stay alive as long as she is alive
plus on a more practical level, when my ideation gets to the point of “okay let’s try to find an equally loving home for her ! maybe even someone who has more space and more time and more emotional bandwidth !” im like wow that would be pretty obvious to anyone that knows you that something is wrong lmao and also i get so sad at the thought of not having her in my life……..which contradicts the “i actually want to be dead” ideation and brings on my next unwavering reason to stay around……which is my extreme fear of death and the unknown
like…….that’s terrifying and idk how it’s just basically accepted that we as humans exist and then stop existing? and that’s it? like a hs classmate of mine just passed away less than a week ago and i can’t stop thinking about it, i selfishly can’t stop thinking how unfair it is that i am sitting here, literally abusing my body every minute of the day and not taking care of any part of my self and yet my health is essentially perfect?? yet she was genuinely one of the nicest ppl in this horrible town and breast cancer took her life and if that doesn’t prove that this life has no logic at all idk what does
and it’s terrifying bc i can’t comprehend what happens after bc in my mind there just can’t logically be any after but there also can’t logically be nothing so it’s just….overwhelming blankness
so now i wake up every day and i cry on my walk to work because i have the same compulsive thoughts about dying at the same spots on the same walk bc my brain is dumb and repeats everything
but also keep thinking about how that would affect the kids i work with, who tell me they love me every day and hug me even though they’re not supposed to and tell me i’m they’re favorite teacher when they’re not supposed to but it’s really only because i’m the only one that knows pokémon enough to print out the coloring sheets they want so it’s conditional love but i don’t even care bc it’s real to them and to me
but then i cry more bc i love them too but i still want to die and they would move on quickly but it would still be something in their life that they certainly dont deserve and wouldn’t understand
so i go to work and i pretend to be a good, caring person and it’s exhausting bc i am not, so i get home and it’s like a switch is flipped and i am an entirely different person with no moral compass and no desire to connect with anyone or be around anyone or do anything…..like at this point i have alienated everyone in my life and can’t see myself getting to a place where i can build connections again, my only social interactions rn are work and i get frustrated that i have to make the same small talk with my coworkers every day, i get frustrated that i have to partake in social niceties or that im expected to go to holiday parties and have lunches with these people who don’t actually know me and i don’t actually know them??
i did have thanksgiving with my family tonight and i know i have so much love for them, and i felt safe there for that time……but there was still this underlying emptiness to everything and even conversations with them, the people i am closest with and really the only ones i talk to anymore, felt surface level in a way that frustrates me and i can’t articulate it accurately but it’s exhausting and i am tired
and i was getting more anxious as i was getting ready to leave my parents bc the time alone after being with family is the hardest for me and my dad turned to my sister…..who had just had another fight with her husband….and said “just so you know, you can stay here tonight, you’re always welcome to stay here” and i started crying on my way home because that’s what i needed to hear tonight but he wouldn’t know that bc i can’t vocalize my emotions like a functional adult and go out of my way to make it seem like i’m doing better than i am so that my mom doesn’t worry
i know i need more help in terms of my mental health (also not in denial abt how bad my eating disorder is rn but that’s another issue that i’m not going to write another novel about rn) but idk what that looks like in my life rn and it’s hard when my depression is this bad because i keep coming back to “yeah i need more help but also it’s all pointless anymore lol” so i just go through my days completed detached and telling myself that any way i can cope is okay bc instagram told me 💖✨if all u did was survive today that is okay✨💖 but really it’s just me enabling apathy and destructive behaviors and moving targets of “i’ll do better once xyz”
idk how to end this post other than to say again that i am safe, just obviously not in a good place mentally but very much able to keep myself alive (i’ve been jaded by too many “instagram cares” messages after posting lol) (i know this is tumblr) (still jaded)
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van-ecks · 1 year
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Ummmm I really wanna know more about your WIP 90s romance but horse divorce is calling my name.... Am I allowed the greed of asking about both? 👀
you absolutely are allowed and i'm so glad you asked 👀
i'll get to horse divorce first bc i have more written for this than the ronance one so far but basically i saw a tweet ages ago (i can't remember the account for the life of me bc i just saw it in passing) about steve not being able to pronounce hors-d'oeuvres and saying 'horse divorce' instead which ??? i really disagreed with because that boy probably grew up listening to his rich mother yelling at caterers about hors-d'ouevres and probably had to attend events and shit just to save face so he definitely would know how to pronounce it imo. but eddie on the other hand... the boy has never seen or heard of hors-d'oeuvres in his life
so it kinda blossomed into this idea of a oneshot of established steddie and steve's parents show their faces for the first time in ages because they have some event to attend and they want steve to go with them so they can allude people to believe they're a solid, loving family unit just to save face and give off a good impression to all those rich fancy assholes that will be there. so steve (rightfully) gets annoyed abt it and eddie (bless him) offers to go with him 'as friends' even tho it's way out of his comfort zone to be around all those snobby rich people that would typically look down on him but he wants to be there for his boyfriend for moral support so he can suck it up for one night for steve's sake
so anyway they get to this function and eddie's looking at this fancy menu and cant pronounce half the shit that's on there and steve's just so enamoured with him because he's clearly making so much effort and he just says 'fuck it' and kisses him in front of everyone and ofc his parents are horrified
snippet:
So instead he ducks a hand underneath the table and realises just how anxious Eddie is when he rests his hand on his thigh and feels his leg bouncing, clearly jittery and nervous. His fingers dig into Eddie's thigh gently, comfortingly, and within ten seconds he feels the tense muscles under his hand relax, sees Eddie's tongue go back into his mouth from where it's poking out between his lips, sees the crease between his brows start to flatten and ease out.
"Steve?" Eddie whispers after a minute or so, finally tearing nervous eyes away from the menu to lean in close, lowering his voice so only Steve can hear. "What the fuck is a horse divorce?"
For a moment, Steve doesn't have a fucking clue what Eddie's talking about until he jabs a finger at the elegant cursive printed across the menu in his hands.
Steve's eyes lift from the menu to Eddie's face, his expression soft and entirely enamoured when he realises what Eddie had been trying to say. 
"What?" Eddie asks, eyes immediately widening in panic. He's been on edge since he got here and it makes Steve's heart ache with adoration, even more so now when he can see the cogs turning in his boyfriend's beautiful head as he tries to figure out what dumb thing he said. "Why are you looking at me like that? What did I do?"
"Hors-d'oeuvres." 
Eddie blinks owlishly. "Whore what?"
aaaaand for the 90s ronance fic, i literally have only written two sentences for it so i don't really have a snippet to share for this but the basic premise is running with maya's idea of a stobin spin-off where they move to nyc and just go to loads of clubs and have fun and then they run into nancy in a queer club with a couple of her emerson friends and it's like that one spider-man meme where nancy, robin and steve are all pointing at each other bc gay
but i'm planning to turn this into a multichap if i ever get round to finishing it and it's v ronance centric and explores a lot of lgbt history in the nineties and has grungy robin being a bit freer and more accepting of herself and nancy having really grown into herself outside of her comphet relationships and it's just been super exciting to plan out (and hopefully will be just as exciting to write!)
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whoreadsnowadays · 2 years
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BRO— OKAY. the shatter hcs got me thinking. and at this point it's pretty obvious i live on angst. so yeah, here goes.
so i'm mostly thinking of what if lil bro does survive. because yknow, getting fucking stabbed through the chest is not something you can just walk away from, let alone without some serious physical and mental consequences. and things like that take a long time to go away, if they ever do.
So the little guy will definetely be dealing with some messed up stuff as he recovers. phantom pain, nightmares, the whole package. this wasn't any less traumatizing for him than it was for his family.
he probably keeps to himself about a lot of it because, while he knows he can and should rely on his family, he can see how much this fucked them up and doesn't want to worry them more than they already are.
(also he can probably tell after what happened they wouldn't want him to go back topside, but he doesn't want to be left behind. which could lead to a scenario where he pretends he's fine enough to go, turns out obviously he wasn't ready yet either physically or emotionally and cue the hurt/comfort but that's another deal for another day)
When it gets to the farmhouse arc, he's obviously devastated about Leo.
Everyone's worried about him, and with good reason, but they end up sort of forgetting that Lil bro is still dealing with his own aftermath, even Lil bro himself. He's still dealing with everything, and the added trauma from Leo's recent window adventures definetely doesn't help, but if he was keeping this to himself before it's ten times worse now.
He has to be okay, the others need him to be okay, in Lil bro's mind he's convinced himself he has to be strong for his big brother.
and besides, it's been so long since what happened to him, he should be fine by now.
At some point it becomes too much, and the lil guy falls with a fever from the stress, or maybe Leo finds him when he's in the middle of one of his pain flare-ups, or even a good ol' emotional breakdown.
Then, this might just be me being petty, but to hell with whoever decided to have Splinter tell his son that his pain wasn't real was a good idea, we're gonna wrap this up in a nice little bow when Leo, while still stuck in his own frustration, sees Lil bro struggling with that same mentality, and realizing that he would never be as harsh with his brother as he's being with himself (and can't stand the thought of his baby brother being as harsh with himself either), finally learns that it's okay for him to take the time he needs to heal, that recovery is hard but as long as he leans on the people that care about him he'll be okay.
Leo then goes to Lil bro and gives him that exact same Big Brother Wisdom speech as if he himself didn't just figure it out like ten minutes ago, it still works just as well because at the end of the day, Lil bro still trusts his big bro Leo more than anyone and if he says they'll be okay, then he believes him. and, well, maybe sharing their struggles and understanding each other will make both their recoveries just that little bit easier on their shoulders.
WOW alright that was longer than I meant it to be but they make me FEEL things okay-- -G
I love waking up to this shit <3<3
BUT YEAH YEA YEA YEA YEA THIS THIS THIS!!!!! THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABT. Lil bro pushing aside his pain and trauma bc he doesn't want to bring it up and make his family relive what happened, and Leo doing the same thing and getting over it when he sees Lil bro doing it too and it breaks his heart enough that he's like "that's not how he should be dealing with this. That's not how I should be dealing with this.." AND THEN THEY HAVE A HEARTFELT TALK WHERE LEO IS LIKE "listen.. I need you to know you can talk to me about stuff okay? And the others too. What you went through was messed up, and you shouldn't have to go through this alone. And before you say it, I am taking my own advice from now on" AND THEY WORK ON OPENING UP TOGETHER..... gimme a minute I have to explode
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quenthel · 2 years
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a few weeks ago my dad was giving me a lift somewhere and he kept talking abt this one thing that happened when i was very very small
so one time i got very sick and since i was incredibly quiet even as a kid nobody really noticed until i couldn't breathe so my family called my dad (who was at work) and he had to beg his boss to let him go so he drove home and I was literally dying and he yelled at my uncle and grandpa (ppl who can drive) why they didnt do anything before taking my mom n me to the hospital and then to another bigger hospital bc it turns out i was legit very very close to dying since my lungs were filled with water (it was some kind of lung inflammation) and i was hospitalized for weeks. My dad got me a duck plushie that we still have somewhere back then and I have some scars from where they pushed tubes in me lmao but I do not remember any of this.
Like most of this story I knew already but my dad specifically talked abt how my uncle and grandpa would have let me die easily bc they are selfish shitheads and that while he was driving me to the hospital (with me laying on his chest as he drove) he was thinking abt how if I do die he is going to kill both of them (which is just soo????) Also he talked abt how he had to stop driving home bc he has to cry so badly and he cried for almost an hour in his car parked somewhere on the side of the road. And he talked abt how my mom did not cry and she just comforted him while he was full on sobbing going into hysterics. And he talked about how my other grandma who never did anything for us showed up this one time bc she kept giving lifts to my mom while my dad was at work.
And honestly I think it really says something about how my grandpa grandma and my uncle reacted bc they just simply did not gave a shit and didnt help while they literally live 5 minutes away from us still. Anyway this is the story of how I almost died when i was like 4
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