#i was just watching this very video last night
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ʟᴇᴛ'ꜱ ɢᴏ ᴘᴀɪɴᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏᴡɴ ᴏɴ ᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴀʏ ʜᴏᴍᴇ,
ᴛʜᴇ ʙʟɪɴᴋɪɴɢ ʟɪɢʜᴛꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ʙʀᴇᴀᴋɪɴɢ ʙᴏɴᴇꜱ
#tmnt 2007#casey jones#raphael hamato#rasey#thank you to everyone who voted the lyrics for the caption#I love doing little things like that it makes posting feel more like a community#also using this to try out an art signature for the first time…it’s took just over 3 years but#the turts day posts are doing very well and someone mentioned making a video so it seemed time to sign stuff#I watched 2007 last week and I bought the dvd from my friend#I really love this movie and it’s concepts and idk if it’s because they’re 20+ and I’m in my teweties#or because the Rasey content in this movie is the best canon rasey rep we have BUT I had to draw them#April definitely knows what’s up with these two but she’s not going to tell anyone#and I love what they have lmao#this was a play with lighting exorcise and I found some great music to listen to while I did it and i I#I just wish I had the energy and time to draw more of these guys fully rendered#this is meant to be when they first meet up for the night#you can decide who’s saying what and weather ralhs lifting the mask up or about to pull it down#oh oh also shout out to Helen who is a lovely catholic lady who saw me do this in public and was very supportive and understanding#also listen I know this is like the other 2007 one I did back in March but idc#there just isn’t enough of these guys I want them to f*ck on roof tops and fire escapes#and ride motorcycles obnoxiously out in public and beat people up in the most sadistic way possible#I want them to drink on Aprils couch together#I want them to offload their mental health issues to eachother in supportive healthy ways#I want them to do it in unhealthy ways where Casey shouts at ralh for making him think he was bedridden for 2 years#I want the#to talk about boring adult things and rediscover silly things they did as teens#idk i hate how aprils main role in the film is trying tk change whk casey is thats not a healthy relationship dont romanticise it
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Shitty comic transmigration, fake white lotus!SJ AU
There were servants, and silk, and sunlight.
"Good morning, Young Master Shen. Did you have a good rest?"
And there was this comic.
"...Mmh, yes. Thank you."
The comic told a tale of romance and triumph over lofty class disparity and illustrated, at one point, the bedroom of the main antagonist--the treasured son of a merchant so wealthy that his political clout sometimes outweighed that of the nation's Emperor's. That bedroom was the quintessential embodiment of that power, sculpted out of pale birch, marble, and imported ivory. It was dustless and glowed with the gentle warmth that only the magnificently wealthy could afford.
"Where would Young Master like to take breakfast today?"
Shen Yuan's attention lingered on the intricately pale room surrounding him, gaze filled not with covetousness but with mild exasperation.
"Right here is fine. Ming Fan?"
"Yes, Young Master?"
He managed to turn the twitch of his lips into a smile when the servant answered to the name. Alright. Alright.
"Wasn't there a super expensive tea gifted to us recently? I'll have that please."
He could deal with this.
//
Shen Yuan's general opinion on the comic was that it was a damn shame how it played out. He'd been ready to look past the uninspired and vague setting and all the tropey character executions because of one thing--that truly brilliant kernel of an idea at the very heart of the story.
What if the white lotus main character was acting all along?
What if, in the classic tale of the saintly poor underdog defeating evil aristocratic entitlement to secure his place on a royal throne, the underdog was every bit as manipulative and nasty as his antagonists?
Enter Shen Jiu, street rat and dreamer of grandeur far beyond his station. Enslaved at a young age, Xiao Jiu was one day suffering yet another very public and humiliating dressing down when Young Master Shen happened to be dining in town. Irked by the noise, Young Master Shen had in turn publicly humiliated Qiu Jianluo, Xiao Jiu's master, which Qiu Jianluo could do nothing but take given the difference in their stations. Of course, later that day, Qiu Jianluo took all his fury out on Xiao Jiu, a session of brutal torture that ultimately became the last straw. Xiao Jiu killed Qiu Jianluo, burned down the Qiu estate, and escaped to the Capital. He found grunt work for room and board at one of the Shen Empire's pig farms and for legal ease, took on the Shen surname.
Then he began scheming. His target was Young Master Shen, who by all accounts was careless with his privilege at best, destructive at worst. Shen Jiu may carry scars from Qiu Jianluo's whips, but he attributed them to Young Master Shen. How was it that some people could be born into nothing but wealth, comfort, and luxury, while others had to suffer the burden of their existence? Why did Young Master Shen get the banquet halls, the expensive robes, the handsome Crown Prince fiance while Shen Jiu got beaten, used, and thrown away?
Shen Jiu decided with the taking of his surname that he would usurp all that Young Master Shen had for himself. Why not? Had Young Master Shen done anything to deserve his privilege? Would anything Shen Jiu do make him undeserving of that same privilege, more undeserving than Young Master Shen?
That was the bit of the story that got Shen Yuan hooked.
The rest of the comic, unfortunately, was seemingly dedicated to undermining all the murky ethics and tangled potentiality of that single bit. After the reveal of Shen Jiu's true nature (in chapter three--that should've been Shen Yuan's first clue that the pacing was going to fail him), the narrative quickly devolved into recycled harem dynamics and tired romance tropes. Poor Shen Jiu was given nothing but a few ominous panels of him smirking past a veil of tears, and Young Master Shen was nothing more than an automaton set to rinse and repeat Humiliation Plot A, B, or C, and get humiliated in turn by a member of Shen Jiu's sparkly boy-harem following a timely rescue of Shen Jiu from that plot.
To say that Shen Yuan had been disappointed would be an understatement.
But that didn't mean Shen Yuan wanted to be transported into this story and take the place of Young Master Shen, way past the point in the story where he'd invoked Shen Jiu's ceaseless retribution. He had actually always rooted for Shen Jiu; as a fuerdai himself, Shen Yuan had been morbidly invested in Shen Jiu's plot to yank this Young Master Shen from his high horse and drag his body three times around the city walls to boot. It was far from sainthood but would it have been wrong? Shen Yuan wanted to know.
...He wanted to know a little less, now that it was his metaphorical corpse on the line. Or perhaps real corpse--there had been a line implying Young Master Shen's suicide at the end of the comic. Forgive Shen Yuan if he wasn't so keen on fulfilling the role of Shen Jiu's punching bag.
So what was he to do? Assuming the worst, Shen Jiu had the protagonist halo and Shen Yuan couldn't just be rid of him. Hug his thighs? No no, from what Shen Yuan knew of Shen Jiu's backstory, their dark protagonist was a hundred percent the type to take every advantage he could from Shen Yuan's capitulation. What Shen Jiu wanted wasn't just the riches, after all, but Young Master Shen's psychological destruction. The moment Shen Yuan started begging for mercy, Shen Jiu wouldn't let him stop.
That left only one option: play Shen Jiu's game all while not worsening Shen Jiu's resentment toward him until he could convince Shen Jiu that destroying Young Master Shen wasn't what he truly wanted. That had to be it, right? Yeah yeah, he may have to take some pain to absolve Shen Jiu's old and frankly warranted grudge (stupid cocky Young Master Shen--couldn't he have just bought and freed Xiao Jiu and called it a day?!), but surely at the end of it all, Shen Jiu's character arc was about building his own life back up from ashes and finding true emotional fulfillment? And romantic love? He had all those pretty-boys dancing around for his attention after all.
All Shen Yuan had to do was ensure Shen Jiu proceeded down that narrative path, and maybe squirrel away a rainy day fund he could take on the run, just in case his father's trade empire truly had to collapse. Shen Yuan hardly needed ivory and marble. A nice little house with all the necessities for life would do.
His mind made up, Shen Yuan stood with a self-affirming nod. Ming Fan immediately clapped his hands.
"Bring them in!"
Servants swarmed with five sets of luxurious designer robes, dripping in rich colors with jewelry in jade and precious metals to match. Shen Yuan blinked, and blinked some more.
Ming Fan, reading his hesitation as dissatisfaction, quickly explained, "that damn sewing house wasn't able to finish the vermillion one in time tonight, but they assure it will be ready in time for the imperial banquet. Would Young Master like me to go 'persuade' them to work faster? That vermillion truly was amazing on Young Master--"
"No, Ming Fan, these will be fine," Shen Yuan absently interrupted. He'd zoned out for the majority of Ming Fan's explanation as to what these outfits were even for, but Shen Yuan had enough context clues to guess he was prepping for a banquet. Hang on, a vermillion designer gown unfinished for some reason? Oh, this must be the banquet where--
Shen Yuan considered the options before him with a little more intent. He thought about color theory. And symbolism.
"The white one with the pale green," he decided. The servants holding the pieces he did not choose quickly filed out, leaving only the garment that Ming Fan was now lifting.
"Excellent choice, Young Master," Ming Fan gushed, smoothing a hand over the fabric and bringing jade piece after jade piece up against it. There was a jade-handle paper fan among the accessories and Shen Yuan picked it up, intrigued. "Young Master will look like a veritable--"
"White lotus?"
Ming Fan nodded enthusiastically, and Shen Yuan hid a chuckle behind the fan. Well. His end goal was Shen Jiu's absolution and happiness, but it didn't mean he couldn't have some fun with irony on the way there.
#snuck in some writing at work lol#get fucked capitalism#svsss#anyways this has shencest endgame written all over it but maybe just poly squad#I watched one of those ‘explains the whole comic’ YouTube videos last night#which very much inspired this and will be properly credited once I find it again lmfao#WRITING WRITING WRITING IT FEELS SO GOOD TO WRITE#my writing
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im hungover and im desperately craving garlic which is terrible because it is Not kind to my digestive system but i want it so badddd
#thunder rambles#im very talkative today cuz im just sitting on my couch watching the new dapg video while i recover from last night
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I'm pretty sure at this point the person that has appeared the most in my dreams/nightmares (apart from people I actually know/used to know in real life) is Jarvis Johnson. it happens a lot, he'll just randomly show up all the time. like last night he was in a (particularly gruesome and unpleasant) nightmare that I had. didn't make any sense but it was nice to get a break for a second :)
#I like when my brain does this#just. oh yeah this is pretty awful. here have A Guy You Like#it does help a little#and it does kinda make sense that he would show up a lot. I find him very calming#there's also been lots of dreams where I was friends with him. and many where I hug him. it's very weird because besides him this really#doesn't happen a lot with anyone else lol#like I've had maybe three dreams that (characters played by) John Larroquette showed up in. and I spend a stupid amount of time thinking#about him lol#anyway I like Jarvis he's great and I'm glad my brain seems to like him too haha#also. that nightmare last night was one of the more brutal ones (like. dozens of young people/teenagers getting killed by a teacher that I#haven't seen in 15 years and who wasn't even that bad. it was just really rough. so yeah getting like a tiny moment of aww hey what's he#doing here that makes no sense! is always nice :') and it's good because then I tend you remember that part a bit more than the rest.)#*to#unfortunately this makes watching his videos (especially sad boyz) a little weird sometimes. like. hey that's my friend. wait no he's not.#I've just dreamed that over a dozen times it's not actually real (unfortunately)#personal
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#gave into the hyperfixation. rewatched Highlander last night. unsurprisingly it really clicked with me this time. it’s a little funny to me#bc I’ve gone on record of saying I though lambert was horrible in it before. and now I love him! so I really enjoyed him! i understood what#he was doing perfectly. I liked that the movie looked like a music video half of the time. there was some baffling scene to scene editing#but that was probably due to a lack of coverage? just very jumpy. Clancy Brown looks cooler than anyone has ever had the right to in that#armor. and Sean Connery is terrific! goated perfomance I’m afraid! I like his death scene it inexplicably turns into evil dead#anyway. I like Highlander. neurodivergently. Christopher Lambert was my most watched actor of 2023
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Vashti, my aasimar bard, started with bagpipes as her instrument, because I thought that was interesting. But the group has become a lot more mobile since our first campaign, so I've quietly made the switch to flute, to keep it in the woodwind family but make it portable.
#what do I even tag this as#dnd#aasmiar#bard#oc don't steal#kat arts#original art#this was a sketch I started a couple weeks ago but you got chibi Odo and Kira instead#(which I don't regret it's just how inspiration went)#then I was very tired last night and had a glut of Cubs videos to watch so I just kinda zenned out and did that
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been getting back into mother 3 after All That and every time i see the sunflower field im like. whoa. that's so neat. i am Not overthinking it !
#i am just making this post to ramble about the sunflower thing again kjfhdg#it's almost been a whole year. i was in the middle of replaying mother 3 last june#i was at the sunflower field scene and decided to stop playing for the night#and that is the same night ''so long nerds'' was uploaded#not to be dramatic or cliche or whatever but. feels very ''on purpose'' ya know#destiny or whatever#the game was a huuuuuuge turning point for me in coping with life and death which i was. Very Bad at before!#and im sure you can tell i still am *(@&*(&*%(&^*#i havent been able to touch the game since but im getting better at it. been watching some videos n stuff about it#i still havent picked it back up tho. idk if i can sit through that cutscene again#i already kinda associated techno with sunflowers bc of the whole rising sun stuff. the staff being a sunflower#but the fact that i was in the middle of that part of mother 3 made that association so much worse#now they're just like. the death object for me. remembrance flowers. idk actual flower meanings but that's what they are to me now#idk if anyone remembers this post but like a week or two after his death my aunt tried growing a sunflower#it was unrelated to me and that whole thing. just another coincidence#she passed this week. so the sunflowers are really back on my mind rn#that's why i turned off the inbox was bc i really didnt know what to do after that#her whole side of the family died this past year#i hate to vent or whatever but i feel like if i dont mention it i'll explode so i've buried this under many other tags#congrats if you read this far i just wanted to have that out there i guess bc i've talked about her a lot#the cats are fine if you remember them. orangey has a home and my uncle is watching thomas#grief#grief cw#i dont remember what ppl tag that as#chat#i'll probably delete this later but im also gonna reblog all the cats n stuff again bc i just want ppl to see them
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Who cried on two separate occasions today over animatronic Disney dragons?
#🎃 cryptid sighting#1st time was watching the first video of a full ride-through I’ve ever seen of the original Journey into Imagination @ Epcot#I don’t think I’ve seen clear video of anything besides the Dreamfinder’s flying machine set so that was amazing#Dreamfinder & Figment have been big comfort characters since I was little so seeing the whole ride all the way through? Waterworks#(esp. seeing they had a whole set dedicated to the creepier/darker side of the imagination. That got me ok?)#And then … well … finding out about Murphy’s destruction at Disneyland’s Fantasmic last night (Saturday). :(#I’ve seen Murphy many times (and the show itself many more- back in the ‘dragon on a stick’ days) so that was heartbreaking seeing her go#I’m so glad all the cast are alright but damn Murphy lived up to her namesake of Murphy’s Law one last time#She went up in a literal blaze of glory. RIP Murphy you beautiful monstrosity#She was truly a remarkable piece of art#(Malificent dragons just can’t catch a break can they? Sheesh.)#To say it’s been an emotional roller coaster of a day for very unexpected reasons would be a massive understatement#Fire tw#< in case any of you go looking up Murphy.
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Just when I thought they weren’t doing much for King of Prism’s 7-year anniversary, cheering shows are returning with a bang. Huge marathon showings in Tokyo and Osaka, Junta Terashima greeting, special videos that are probably going to become lost media, the works. The postcard bonus is a reissue of some of the earliest promo art they ever released for King of Prism, which is kind of strange but also kind of meaningful I guess.
#king of prism#for a moment i wondered what took so long#until i remembered the azuna concert i watched last night#after all this time cheering at events is finally being allowed for the very first time since covid#the last time i ever saw a kinpri movie in theaters was just after cheering was outlawed#and it felt so sad#.....wow has it really been that long#anyway#king of prism is a series that actually has a lot of lost media#from various theater and prizoom videos that never made it to dvd#to what we couldn't save from prism rush#etc
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grandparents stop playing videos so fucking loud!!!!
#most of the time their hearing isn’t even that bad they’re just unaware of the fact that they’re being loud af#i was watching a very serious movie last night and in a quiet scene one of my grandparents was watching a video with very loud music like 😭
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First I watched Tango’s POV of him wrangling the warden and I was stressed and impressed and then the chaos was glorious.
Then I was Scar’s POV and he was like. Non stop chaos the entire time. At least it explained why he wasn’t home when Tango was around there.
And then this morning I watched BigB and WOW the subplot with Grian and Ren and Scott the therapist and everything. Straight out of a fanfic oh my god it was incredible.
Also I love that every episode is like. Episode things. And then surprise at the end there’s the warden!
#double life smp#I had thoughts when I was watching last night but I figured I should wait until all episodes released before saying anything here bc of the#the whole delaying all the episodes thing#side note I saw that the videos were delayed bc of a death and thought it was respectful and stuff#but then an hour or so after I saw that then my grandmother died#and then it was a rollercoaster of emotions and things to do and seeing family etc#that by the time I got home I was very glad that there were at least some episodes of double life to watch to distract me#bc I just wanted a distraction at that point#that’s when I watched tango and scar then went to bed
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my knowledge driving test is today and im so nervous :(
#i dont feel like im gonna pass#which is stupid because i can drive and i do it very safely#but like. its just that theres so much shit they want you to memorize that most people dont actually know/remember#and im just so nervous#ive done sooooo many practice tests and ive watched a billion videos#i read half the manual cause i couldnt get through all of it before bed last night#and im worried that because i didnt read through the whole thing im going to fail#my average for practice tests though is like a 90-95%#so like?? i should be fine??#ive known almost every answer to every question thats been thrown my way#and you can literally miss 8 questions and still pass#but god. i am so fucking scared right now#i think i would be less nervous and it would feel less high stakes if i wasnt getting my license so i could drive#me and my partner to a concert three hours away from where i live in like two weeks#so my parents dont have to drive us#i dont think i would care about potentially failing as much regularly because the time frame wouldnt really matter#but it is time sensitive so im afraid#im also worried that my partner is gonna be disappointed in me if i fail and cant get my license in time#but thats a whole other thing#aiilov-personal
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oh god i havent looked at youtube all day today have they massacred my boy
#im SO afraid to look#im not going to go looking for it. if i come across it natrually well then maybe i will watch it. but holy shit#torn absolutely TORN between refreshing everything or just going i am looking away i do not see it#because LAST YEAR. i had to sit thru like a whole 20 minute video and then he was only in it for like.#a single line of dialogue at the very end.#hmmmmmmmmm#nobody tell me. but also i kind of want you to tell me. hows my boy is he ok is he covered in blood#im gonna sit in my 2 hr halloween night car ride and daydream abt us carving pumpkins and dressing up together in the meantime#head in hands. muffled screaming#happy anniversary. btw.#🔪#it has now been.... 7 years. holy shit#well. technically 5. but he has been in my LIFE for 7 years so im counting it . he was one of those insta-crush characters.#but i disnt know self ship was a proper thing until later#or. i did bc ive been doing it for like. forever#but i had a few layers of self inflicted cringe and also i didnt rlly know there was a community for it.#IDK. IM RANBLING CAUSE IM NERVOUS#i miss him. but also. i dont like the direction the story is implied to be going#((i say the word “story” so very loosely. but still. i miss 2016 era so bad))
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sitting on the floor, surrounded by folded laundry, debating now what to watch and whether or not i want to try and read some fics or write some fics or if it is just a Floor Night
#i've been having nights where i just choose to spend the whole night on the floor instead of my very comfortable couch#i think they'll just become Floor Nights bc it. it's not every night#last time i watch stitch 2 and also ash's react videos#now i may watch ash's new heartstopper video and then into the spiderverse#though im also tempted to try and write some wilmon fluff bc the boys deserve happiness damnit#and i used to only ever write fluff ??? what happened here#now it's always so angsty ;;;#ALSO!!! im so amused bc my clothes match my nail polish skdfhsdkhf#this is irrelevant to everything but im amused by it nonetheless#shh ac
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I think they should be allowed to put, idk, crack cocaine in cat medicine. Get them hooked so they want it stuffed down their throats.
#third pill was a two person job#I’m glad her stress response is to go catatonic but that doesn’t stop her from spitting it out 50 times and needing to be burritoed#and while she doesn’t bite me the response to gag and twist away accidentally scratches my knuckles ow#i watched some YouTube video but my technique is just not working god#today my mom burritoed her and held her on her back so I could use both hands to pull her#I’m very afraid this will simply wreck any and all trust and love between us. she’s quite hesitant over me now already#she used to sleep in my bed every night and now she’ll barely sit in my lap#and last night I had a bizarre fish stress dream where all my previous dead fish were still on the tank and actively dying of dropsy#so i opened their food and found. a bunch of dead angelfish in it? so I tried to pour them into the tank to save them#and all the food got in the water and started to poison the fish ugh ah god#this blog is becoming my rant space#which is funny because I queue everything so I feel like it’s all broken up by shitposts#sick pet#not fish
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can't fucking believe vent is still down. where else am i gonna yell about being ill
#anyway it is Day Two and. i feel better in some ways but worse in others#had the worlds most disrupted night of sleep and now i'm coughing a lot more than yesterday and it sucks#but my throat feels less sore for sure. feels like my body is fighting this thing off super hard 💪💪💪💪 shame about the full body aching#and overall lack of energy. ooouugghhh and the lost voice of course. but this always fucking happens#i'm gonna have to pass on games night tonight if i'm still coughing a lot and/or still missing my voice#but aaaauugghhh the love of my friends will surely heal me like nothing else. unless they make me laugh and send me into a coughing fit#rambling#my god yeah thats one of the worst parts of being ill. cant watch anything that makes me laugh. im fucking dying of boredom here#sure there's other stuff to watch but no funnies and no video games when that's all i want rn. havent watched any more flapjack in DAYS#it's nowhere near as bad as covid so this is entirely unnecessary but i am once again getting thr urge to document my symptoms#with a god damn spreadsheet. but it's not as complex at all so eh.#i can't say too much about how much better i'm feeling just yet tbh bc i'm still back in bed hfkdhgkdh i can walk sure#but i need to go downstairs and make breakfast soon which is the REAL first hurdle#also the question of am i ready for toast again or do i need to stick to porridge just to be safe#not gonna lie. i didn't love the noodles i had yesterday so i'm wondering if i'll have the appetite for something else#i want a sandwich so fucking bad but i don't want to eat dry bread at the same time. aaauuggghhh#my sibling offered me a hot chocolate last night and i had to turn that down bc chocolate plus cold for me is a big no#but aaauugghhh a nice warm drink probably would’ve been rlly nice#i return once again to announce that got damn! i feel notivesbly better than i didn an hour ago and my voice is like 30% back!#which means that by tonight i might very well be at a functional enough level to hang out with friends after all#i can always dip if my energy levels tank again or whatever but like honestly hanging out with them is like. i need that#the last two days havent been great and i miss them and we have a lot to talk about so yeah i will do everything in my power#to be there tonight. but i will not force myself or push myself too far. bc i am the king of self care 💪💪💪#god sorry back again but. it continues to fascinate me how any kind of illness affects me in the same ways consistently regardless of what#kind of illness it is??? right now i have whats mainly a cough which is honestly rare for me when i get ill#it's usually more in the nose department and sometimes the throat but rarely the chest#and yet 9 out of 10 times i lose my voice. i Always struggle with low energy (altho thats a problem outside of being ill too jfdjgdhfhd)#have a hard time falling or staying asleep and i get nauseous if i sleep laying down enough#but also i am the king of hard and fast aka i get like 24 terrible hours and then recovery is super quick. i'll be back to 100% health in#less than a week. my poor fucking step dad has been in stage one for a WEEK it's really awful. but i have the power of youth on my side 💪
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