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#i think its so sweet and lovely when people do that but then when i want to do it i'm like ..... ok chill out cherry x
polarisjisung · 2 days
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MOTORBIKES & MELATONIN
synopsis: sleep doesn't find you in the comfort of your own home or under the covers tucked safely into your bed— sleep finds you in the warmth of park jisung's arms
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wc: 1.1k
pairings: jisung × fem!reader, established relationship
genre: fluff
warnings: insomnia + mentions of using sleeping pills/supplement use of the word drug (literally once), speeding (follow the speed limit 🙏)
notes: emosung brainrot is in full swing (though there's not a lot of emosung mentioned) mostly self indulgent so probably not my best work since I was all up in my head but 🤷‍♀️
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you're laying on your bed, aimlessly bouncing the soft tennis ball in your hand against the empty space of the wall just above your headboard. sleep never came easy to you and tonight is no different.
you'd tried it all, counting sheep, drinking warm milk, even meditation but nothing ever worked. instead you spent nights tossing and turning restlessly despite being tucked into the warm covers of your bed, chasing sleep.
just as you reach for the purple bottle that lays next to your bed, ready to pour half the jar of supplements into your hand and gulp them down with a glass of water, you hear it.
your perfect form of melatonin and serotonin mixed in one— your drug, your purpose.
the rumble is distinct. it comes with the soft vibration beneath your feet and the deep reverberation in your ears. the roaring of the v twin engine has you shooting up into a seated position as realisation washes over you
there's a dim red glow cast across your room by the break lights as you grab the loose fit leather jacket that rests over the back of your study chair. the woody oriental cologne still lingers through its material as you place it over your shoulders and run out of the front door.
there he is, helmet gripped loosely in his left hand, his right arm open and ready to welcome you into his embrace.
jisung's black hair flows in the wind, his forehead on show— paired with the soft smile he flashes you, you can't help but think he looks perfect.
"didn't even give me a chance to sneak into your room" he sulks taking you in between his arms, giving you a quick spin as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead
"can't blame a girl for wanting to see her boyfriend" you sigh, taking in his warmth with a smile
"yeah?" he pulls back to get a better view of your face, "miss me that much angel?"
"you know it sung"
his laugh is deep yet gentle, eyes sparkling at the sight of you
"well I'm here now"
jisung takes a quick step around you, his touch feather light as he gathers your open hair into a low ponytail, reaching for the hair tie on his wrist to tie it back
"too tight?" he says, voice full of worry and concern— when you shake your head he smiles, placing his helmet over your head
you wonder how people could ever think jisung was anything but the sweet, kind and warm hearted lover you knew, who wouldn't dare let you move an inch to do something he could do for you, like how he gently takes ahold of you in his arms and places you onto the seat of his bike, eventually taking your arms and wrapping them around his waist
"hold on tight" he whispers in that caring tone of his, that's reserved solely for you, ready to whisk you away for the night and you do just that, gripping his waist securely, but not before lifting his visor and pressing a quick kiss to his temple
jisung drives off, wordlessly but with a smile that speaks volumes
there's a warmth that radiates from jisung's body, the only thing keeping you from freezing as the wind rushes past you, blowing with harsh whistles, tyres screeching against the ground as he takes sharp turns through the streets leading towards the countryside
you'd snuck out before, driven way too far over the speed limit, done countless things that would define your reckless youth and yet nothing had your veins coursing with quite so much adrenaline as this, driving way too far, way too fast, with jisung, the person you loved way too much
like always, you find yourself in jisung's lap, god forbid he let you sit on the grass, wet from the fresh morning dew that rests over it, warm hues of orange and light pinks taking over the sky as you hold one another close, the wind still blowing strong gusts your way, your hair blowing in your face until jisung decides to take it between his fingers and hold it back in his palm
"I like this" you whisper, just loud enough that jisung hears it, his lip rising just enough for his teeth to come on show
"I like you" he responds, watching the warm glow of the sun reaching over the horizon through your eyes
"you do?" you smile, wider than you previously had been, it's a smile that reaches your eyes and jisung's unwavering gaze grows brighter at the realisation
"you're my girl, of course I do"
this time it's his turn to press a quick kiss to your forehead, but jisung's greedy, especially so when it comes to you and he can't help but want more, honey brown eyes resting on your lips
"give me a kiss and I think I'll love you forever" you can't help but giggle at the tickling feeling of jisung's hair against your neck as he pouts up at you
"yeah? didn't know my boyfriend needed kisses to do that" you tease with a roll of your eyes
"didn't know your what?" he asks, and you know exactly what jisung's doing, so you whisper the answer with nothing more than a shy smile straight into his ear
"my boyfriend"
"present" jisungs hand is raised and his voice is confident when he looks at you again, it's like he's begging you to tug at his shirt and crash your lips against his, and who were you to say no to him
"you're so cute" you let out between kisses, the bridge of your nose resting against jisung's, who now wears a look of faux offence
"yeah?" he asks, hoping you'll change your mind, though you don't let up, reaching out to ruffle his black hair "only for you"
somewhere between the late hours of the night and the early hours of dawn, between the quietus of your bedroom and the roar of his engine, between gazing up at the stars and watching the sunrise by the harbour— jisung hears your soft snores replace the quiet whispers of awe you once breathed out.
despite it all, jisung's smile remains all the same, radiant, warm and masked by the matte black helmet resting atop his head
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kindestofkings · 13 hours
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espresso
lando norris x reader
dets: an international pop star and a f1 driver could never be secretly dating right? right?
authors note: this is kinda chaotic but its been still in my drafts since that damn espresso song came out, how is it so good?
faceclaim: sabrina carpenter
yourusername
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liked by ynfan1 and others
yourusername me laughing at all y'all trying to figure out who my hot songs are about LOOLLLLLL you'll know when I want you to know MWAH xx
melbourne tonight :)))
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ynfan1 you are so unhinged I LOVE
charli_xcx just tell them its me !
yourusername you're right sorry wifey xx
ynfan2 wait are they still around??
ynfanupdates wait whats happening in melbourne tonight ???
ynfan3 she's so secretive, I didn't even know she was dating anyone
landonorris
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liked by martingarrix and others
landonorris tralia mate
view all other comments
danielricciardo looking fresh mate
landonorris thanks babe xx f1fan1 landos longest relationship right here f1fan2 bahahah for real man is chronically single
oscarpiastri 👍👍
f1fan1 best of luck this weekend !
yourusername just posted to their close friends!
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[caption: baby just had a great weekend at the office <3]
replies:
maxfewtrell disgustingly sweet
↳ jealousy is a disease, better get checked out xx
alexalbon ugh you two make me sick
↳ oh yeah and yourself and lily aren't worse 😐
yourusername
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liked by martingarrix and others
yourusername missing tour hours, should we do it again??
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ynfan1 PLEASE COME BACK
oliviarodrigo you never rest queen
yourusername lol duty calls ynfan1 huh? hasn't she been off for ages ? ynfan3 singers can have other responsibilities you do know that right
ynfan2 I just want to know who you're dating..
ynfanupdates
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liked by ynfan1 and others
ynfanupdates yourusername out in monaco tonight !
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ynfan1 huh wonder what has her in monaco? she's there alot recently
ynfan2 looooveee the orange
landofan1
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liked by landoupdates and others
landofan1 firstly tell how is a man so hot?? also look at how much he's vibing to yourusername's feather remix??
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landofan1 I could take him (not in a fight)
ynfan1 he is just like me fr
f1fan1 no WAY whats he doing playing yn? 👀
ynfan1 I mean she is one of the biggest pop singers in the world rn f1fan1 orrrrrrrr ynfan2 haha you wish
yourusername oooh whos he ?
landofan1 bahaahahha girl, you are everything I want my popstars to be
yourusername
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liked by chapellroan and others
yourusername pookie is away (again) so heres some pics of me looking hot for pookie, and pookie only <3
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ynfan1 what boyfriend would ever leave you??
yourusername I know right?? poor me !
chapellroan need a sub ?
yourusername I don't know what you're abbreviating but yes. yes please.
reneerapp god DAMN
(liked by yourusername)
f1fan1 hmmmmmmhmmm away? and theres a grand prix this weekend
lando.jpg
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liked by ynfan1 and others
lando.jpg returning the favour x Race weekend was gud
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landofan1 people died.
oscarpiastri such a poser
lando.jpg my lady loves it 🤷 landofan1 IS HE IN A RELATIONSHIP landofan2 since when wtf
f1fan1 I don't even care how delusional I am, he'd be so hot for yourusername
ynfan1 Ikr but they don't even follow each other :((
yourusername just posted to their story!
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[caption: pookie has returned <3]
replies:
landonorris I don't know how I feel about pookie...
↳ but POOKIE I love it (and you)
↳ landonorris ugh okay fine (love you too)
charli_xcx this soft launch is mean, and I know who it is
↳ hehehhe lol its SO fun tho
f1fan1 is that papaya ?
yourusername just followed landonorris!
landonorris just followed yourusername!
yourusername
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liked by landonorris
yourusername need a pick me up ?
Espresso 4/11 @ 8pm ET,
Music Video 4/12 @ 10:00am ET
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ynfan1 woooo queen is back
ynfan2 LOVE the vibe of this
landofan1 is that the JOLLY ???
landofan2 do we think lando is in the video?? cause thats defo him!
landonorris uber rating ?
yourusername 4 stars out of 5 ! missing star is because you kept making me laugh during filming landonorris always knew being so funny was a double edged sword. georgerussell sorry just confirming, do you think YOU are the funny one? ynfan1 what a random friendship, but so cute
f1fan1 finally followed each other, my delusions don't feel so crazy
landofan1 I would loveee if they became friends
landonorris just added to their close friends!
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[caption: we just hard launched via music video and people are thinking FRIEnDshIP ?]
replies:
yourusername babyyyy they're so stupid
↳ told you it's crazy you're dating me..
↳ yourusername UGH no enough of that
danielricardio the landonorizz lore is to deep I'm afraid..
lilyme cons of dating a hottie
yourusername
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liked by landonorris and others
yourusername guys this is my POOKIE! I just hardlaunched my muse, y'all should be blessed !
(last pic is not mine but like look at how he looks at me teehee...)
tagged: landonorris
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landonorris love of my life fuck
ynfan1 damn y'all are in love love aren't you
fan1 this is crazy to me lando and THE pop it girl??
yourusername me and THE lando norris who is a professional hottie and my pookie xx landofan1 ugh im obsessed with you two
ynfan1 you're telling me you've been dating another celebrity for at least 3 years and we've seen ZERO pap pics?
f1fan1 for real tho we would've seen her at a grand prix, theres thousands of cameras landofan1 yeah seems suss yourusername ugh guys !!! why are you making me spell everything out for you landonorris time to cook darling
mclaren finally the parents are insta official
yourusername get hyped to see me at a gp wigless xxx
ynfan1 you wear wigs??
yourusername have you worn wigs?? landonorris will you wear wigs??? ynfan1 omfg I get it now
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landonorris
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liked by yourusername and others
landonorris meet my three year pr relationship x
tagged: yourusername
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yourusername yes sorry guys the warming climate is all our fault !! just so fucking hot we cant help it eek
oscarpiastri you two are so unbearable already please go back to being a secret landonorris after 3 years of norizz jokes, I thinkkkk no !
landofan1 THREE yEaRs ???
mclaren wearing papaya off season? oh shes a keeper
ynfan1 heheh admin gets it
danielricciardo rip norizz it was fun while it lasted..
landonorris fun for WHO??
[finished]
hehe im working lateeee, cause I procrastinated doing assignments all day xx
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sreidisms · 12 hours
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Stress Release
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Sub!Spencer Reid x Dom!GN!Reader
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Summary: Spencer needs you to take care of him after a rough couple of days at his new job.
Genre: smut
Word Count: 861
Warnings: pegging, reader is GN but uses a strap-on so?? afab implied, slight cum play, slight overstimulation if you squint, many many pet names (sweet boy, love, sweetheart, darling, baby).
A/N: I needed something to get my creative juices going because I've been in the worst writing slump of my life, so enjoy this quick little blurb of the cutest, subbiest Spence <3
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Spencer was splayed out on your shared bed, his previously-gelled hair tousled and spread out on the fresh sheets like a halo around his head, however juxtaposing the current situation he was in - it was far from holy as your strap-on was gliding in and out of him with lewd ease.
The excuse from your boyfriend was that he needed the stress fucked out of him - maybe not put as crudely as that, but you knew what words were floating through his head. Paperwork, cases, and meeting people had been too much for the new agent, and he just wanted you to fuck him dumb for a while, for positive psychological purposes only obviously.
“How’s that feeling, sweet boy?” you cooed, pressing his knees further back to get the right angle to hit that lovely spot deep inside his abdomen.
“Mmm … g-great,” he mumbled, licking his lips and letting his mouth fall open once again.
“That’s good, Spence. Keep your legs like this, please, love.” Your hands moved to hold his slender and naked waist, thus providing you with the perfect leverage to smoothly thrust the thick dildo into his tight hole.
Pegging had been a recent addition to your sex life and you had been surprised when Spencer brought it up one day, timidly explaining how he had stumbled upon it online and wanted to try it out; little did he know, you had been dreaming about that scenario for months. With gentle steps and a good amount of research, it soon became a favourite activity for the both of you.
Spencer didn’t know why he liked it so much. It was probably a mix of being able to let go for once in his life and let someone else do the taking care of, he reflected. And besides, it was nice to not have to think about the logistics of something for a change.
For you? Oh, you loved watching your bright and loquacious genius be reduced to whines and pants every once in a while. It wasn’t a secret that he overworked himself and so you wanted to allow him the space to lay back when needed.
Now, one of your hands had found its way to your boyfriend’s throbbing cock, setting a relentless pace, up and down to give him more relief.
“O-Oh fuck,” he whined as he grasped your arm with a tight grip. “Don’t … stop, d-don’t …” His sentence was cut off when your thumb stroked the underside of his tip, forcing out a guttural moan and a harsh thud as his head hit the mattress again.
You hushed him. “You don’t have to worry, darling. Just relax, I’m here to make you feel good.” He nodded frantically, sucking his lower lip with his teeth to stifle the noises that were begging to escape his mouth.
As much as it was embarrassing, you were sure that your neighbours on the floor beneath your apartment could hear the never-ending squeak of the bed frame grinding against the linoleum, but you couldn’t care less in that moment. Your mind was set on bringing the highest of pleasures to your boyfriend as you skilfully hit his prostate over and over, each push of your hips punctuated with a moan from Spencer.
“P-Please …”
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” you asked worriedly, quickly cupping his cheek with the hand that was resting on his waist. “Are you close?”
“Uh huh … please, please l-let me …” The sentence died at the back of his throat.
“Go ahead, you’ve been such a good boy, you deserve this.”
You stopped your actions for a second and swiftly pulled him closer to you from his legs, accidentally ramming the tip of your strap-on painfully hard against his sweet spot. It wasn’t your intention but cum gently dribbled down his flushed dick as he panted.
In an effort to not leave him with a ruined orgasm, you planted your fists on the bed, Spencer’s angelic face between them, and you hiked your knees up onto the edge of the bed before picking up the pace once more and driving the fake cock deep inside him.
“O-Oh …” The man was too far gone drowning in pleasure to have the energy to make noise, eyes screwed shut and fingers fisting the sheets.
“There we go,” you purred. The feeling of more cum being fucked out of him spread across both of your stomachs, creating the most delicious mess you could imagine.
You eventually took pity on him and slowed down your hips and teasingly pressed on his legs to spread them further, pulling back to see his weeping length softening against his porcelain skin.
“You did so well, Spence.” You took your pointer finger and spread the viscous liquid across his tummy, and then slowly traced it to the head of his cock. His hips bucked forward and he hissed.
“D-Don’t … sensitive.”
You giggled and leaned down to give him a soft kiss. “Sorry, baby, you’re so easy to tease.”
Spencer’s eyes opened to meet your loving expression and he smiled in return. “I love you.”
“I love you too, always.”
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I hope you enjoyed this! I promise I'll get to writing all the suggestions in my inbox eventually, it means so much to me that people show interest :) thank you
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blueseint · 2 days
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one thing i love about sz/sz is the clear distinction of themes and the way both of them view each other and just mixing it all. I can enjoy my fair share of possessive zoro when it comes to zs but it's more about thinking about how his devotion towards the rest of the crew (pre relationship) fuels his feelings towards sanji and the need to make sure he knows how important he is for him, how he would follow him anywhere sanji wants. Zoro would do anything as long as it made sanji happy imo (it can totally turn a little bit weird, we are talking about ZOSAN of all people. Zoro would definitely say some insane shit like cutting his chest open and giving sanji his own heart in case he is hungry or something like that)
And don't get me started with sanji's need to make sure zoro feels loved all the time, not just with food, but through quality time (no matter how little it is, his free time would definitely be reserved for zoro) he would think his actions are his way of saying "i understand how lonely you must have felt" after kuina and his years as a pirate hunter which later on turns into a "i want to give you a piece of what zeff and the rest of the baratie staff gave me". Sanji would be SO sweet with zoro once in a established relationship, and zoro would feel a kind of love he never knew existed, and that realization alone is enough for him to bow to never let anything bad happen to sanji, not because he thinks sanji is weak but simply because its what he deserves. Seeing sanji happy makes zoro happier
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Text
Mistakes and regrets
☆ Pairing: Loki x Reader
☆ Synopsis: Loki is a prisoner that sees his way out through pretending to date you, but when he finds true love he doesn't know how to deal with the guilt of making a very similar damage to the one that had been done to him when he was used for what originally were selfish reasons.
☆ Word Count: 10.5k, I think that's my longest fic yet, and written in the shortest time lapse, not sure what that says about my mental stability rn.
☆ Notes: As I proofread I noticed this could be interpreted as generational trauma, sort of... given I made Loki sort of mirror what Odin did to him. But I wasn't trying to be deep, I just felt like shit during the week and used this to cope. The fic might be cringy as a result, I am honestly not sure.
☆ Warnings: Depression and guilt are the focus points of this storyline. Loki starts is kinda toxic his behavior here isn't meant to be romanticized or intended to be extrapolated to real life, I just wanted to explore a narrative surrounding poor decisions and the dealing of its consequences. The reader is kinda a Mary Sue of sweetness but I just wanted to hammer in Loki feeling bad and guilty. I don't know if this is a trigger but I touch the vault scene of Loki and Odin and Odin being forgiven is also handled, Idk if that's trigger warning worthy but I know most of the fandom hates him.
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“You’re not making it any for me brother.” Thor spoke through the glass.
“I want my freedom, brother.” Loki sighed, sitting down on the uncomfortable bench. “Don’t think of me as ungrateful, but as much as I appreciate not being executed, I can’t exactly call this a life.”
“Director Fury insisted, I’ve tried explaining to him that New York was a complicated situation. But he wants to be sure you are not a threat to Earth– uh, Midgard.”
“You've surely adapted well to living here” Loki rolled his eyes. “Pathetic.”
“Cooperate with me, I brother” Thor begged. “I want to help you, but I need you to help me first.”
“I’m not sure what I am expected to do from here” Loki huffed annoyed.
Thor sighed and gave his little brother a sympathetic look. Loki was frustrated, and he couldn’t blame him. He would be too if he got brainwashed, had all his anger, sense of betrayal and resentment exploited to torture an innocent planet, and still be the one to pay for said crimes… Sure he wouldn’t be all jokes and laughs.
“I’ve been negotiating a way to test your stability and get your freedom” Thor smiled hoping to cheer up his brother. And he made Loki look up. “It’d be a bit uncomfortable at first. But I know you can prove yourself. You’d have to wear cuffs or a while, but you’d be free to walk around with me and the others on trips to the city.”
“Hooray…” Loki rolled his eyes.
“Please brother, I’m trying, I just need you to be patient.” Thor spoke sadly as he made his way out. “I hate this as much as you do.”
“Do you?” Loki said. “As far as I know, you’re not the one in a crystal cell.”
“Alright, almost as much as you do.” Thor joked softly and Loki did chuckle weakly.
He agreed that Thor had been furious. But it all happened so fast.
Thor had managed to land a fatal blow on Thanos’ chest and soon Steve, Natasha, and Bruce had arrived to back him up and retrieve the Infinity gauntlet. They opened a portal to bring back Tony, Doctor Strange, and the Spider Ling… And surprisingly a weird group of space travelers.
When Thor realized they could travel to anywhere in the universe they opened a portal to rescue the Asgardian ship. There were a lot of severe wounds but surprisingly Thanos had failed, he underestimated the strength of Asgard, and most people could be saved.
“Thor!” Valkyrie screamed and rushed to hug the king.
“Valkyrie! You are alright! Thank goodness!” Thor smiled in relief and hugged his friend.
“Thor you have to come quick!” Valkyrie urged him. “It’s Loki!”
Thor’s heart sank, his heart couldn’t stand burying the only family member he had left. Thor had lost his parents… he had seen his whole planet die. But not his baby brother. Not Loki. Not again.
“Please… not now… Let’s treat the wounded ones first…” Thor spoke with a knot on his throat. “I want to focus on saving lives first.”
“Thor, you don’t get it! He’s alive!” Valkyrie scolded him. “But he’s in a critical state! We need to take him to a safe place to treat him.”
A tear streamed down the new king’s face, and he felt as if he had finally put down a enormous boulder he had been holding onto. He didn’t lose Loki.
“Take me to him!” Thor urged them.
Valkyrie took Thor to a damaged room in the ship that had been used as an improvised infirmary. In the corner laid a figure Thor knew too well being treated by healers.
“Brother!” Thor said. “Oh Gods… You’re alive…”
“You can’t get rid of me that easily thunder brain… ugh…!” Loki joked weakly as he groaned in pain. The healers begged him not to move as they tried stabilizing his condition. His neck had been nearly obliterated.
It was a miracle Loki hadn’t died and that the healers had managed to find him on time.
“We couldn’t abandon him” one of the healers spoke politely to her king. “After all, it was because of you and prince Loki that Lady Valkyrie managed to evacuate the survivors. We apologize for not finding you, my king.”
“It’s no problem at all” Thor laughed in an uncharacteristically quiet manner. He was breathless. “Thank you for saving my brother’s life.”
The lady healer let out a sheepish giggle and bowed. Loki rolled his eyes, earning a lecture from the healers that were still treating him. King or not, Thor still had that charm that seemed to make most people swoon.
The reunion was interrupted by a group of soldiers that broke in with a logo on their uniforms that made Thor’s blood boil when they pointed their weapons at Loki. SHEILD.
They picked up the stretcher where Loki was laying in and took him away to lock him up.
Apparently, the news travel fast, but SHIELD travels faster, and hearing Loki was alive was enough to mobilize and capture the injured God and lock him in a crystal prison cell in a SHIELD base. If Loki had a coin for every time that happened… he’d have two.
He couldn’t say Thor didn’t do anything about it. He could hear the thunders and enraged screams from his brother, demanding for an explanation and Loki’s immediate liberation.
“I demand my brother is released immediately!” Thor yelled.
“You should consider yourself grateful we’re allowing your witches to go and heal that world-level threat! He would be better off dead!”
“Don’t you dare speak of my brother like that! Me and all of my people would’ve died if it wasn’t for him!”
Loki wasn’t sure if he was amused or if he felt bad.
It did stroke his ego being called “Asgard’s hero” in the middle of the yelling. It shouldn’t have surprised him that Nick Fury was just as loud as Thor when angry. He couldn’t complain much. It made it much easier to hear what was going on, which was good, he was too weakened to use his magic to spy on them.
The healers tending to his neck sure seemed awkward overhearing the fight. It must have been uncomfortable to be doing your job in a high security cell. So, he tried entertaining the healers as he could. Although all he got was a lecture when his magic drained his energy, and they needed him awake to monitor him.
Soon he got better, he but wasn’t allowed to be out of his cell. It was a bit nostalgic, in some dark and twisted way. It even made him want to fix his old horned helmet, even if Thor would call him a cow for wearing it.
And when things couldn’t get worse… he met you.
“It’s lunch time” a voice said in a weirdly friendly tone before you head popped by the entrance as you balanced a tray of food on your head in an attempt to amuse Loki. He wondered if there were buffoons in Midgard, but you always tried to draw a laugh from him… Tried.
“Tough crowd, eh?”
Loki couldn’t not be baffled by the way you talked to him. Although he couldn’t decide if that was because you surely knew his reputation as Midgard’s terrorist or because you always talked in a friendly and goofy tone in a maximum-security prison in a super-secret spy agency. You also seemed to be awfully young to be here, but you couldn’t be much older than the girl Barton took as his protégée.
“What’s on the menu today?” Loki asked in a more formal tone.
“Why the hurry?” you asked, “don’t tell me you got somewhere else to be.”
“You think you are a lot funnier than you really are” Loki rolled his eyes. “And it’s not very nice to make fun of someone’s disgrace.”
“I hear you think I’m at least a little bit funny” you smiled as you kept balancing the tray of food on your head.
“Please don’t drop my food, I’d like to have at least something to eat” he rolled his eyes.
You tripped on your feet, and he saw the tray falling down, you caught it last second with your shins, and gave him a little sheepish grin.
“Alright, alright, I’m impressed” Loki groaned. “Can I eat now please? Or is having you torment me part of some attempt to break me?”
“Why are you so moody?” you asked. “More than usual, I mean.”
“I’m starving, and you humans eat way too little” Loki finally admitted. “But that is still better than nothing… Please.”
You stopped playing around and you looked at him as you got the tray into his cell.
“Sorry, I didn’t know you were eating so little.” You admitted.
“I barely have energy to cast small illusions, which would serve to entertain myself.” Loki complained as he sat to eat and you sat by the table and looked at him, you didn’t seem afraid, curious at most. You watched him eat and took his dirty plates by the end.
You weirded him out.
You always did something along the same lines; you came to bring him food, teased him a little and then left when you were gone. Although this time you had asked more questions about him. And you seemed more pensive while he ate.
And later that day he got a surprise. Usually, he just saw you to deal with you while he ate. But today you returned with a brown paper bag on your hands and a backpack, you never carried personal objects with you.
“What now?” he groaned.
You said nothing but opened the door to pass him food and slid the bag inside. Loki opened his end and grabbed the bag, it was warm, and it had a strong smell inside, he reached and pulled out a weird soft cushion with a white cover.
“Bur…ger? What this?” he asked as he read the yellow letters.
“It’s food” you smiled. “Cafeteria is closed until dinner, so I thought bringing you something else might boost your mood.”
“This looks like junk” he snarled, making you laugh.
“It’s something like that.”
Loki looked inside the bag and looked at you.
“There’s no fork.”
“You eat it with your hands” you smiled and pretended to grab a burger and bite it. “Like a sandwich.”
“What’s a sandwich?” Loki asked, making you laugh again.
Loki tried to take a bit, imitating your gesture, but you stopped with a squeaky laugh.
“Unwrap it first!” you laughed. “The white thing paper is not edible.”
Usually Loki would’ve argued more. But he had been really hungry, so he agreed.
“The taste is agreeable enough.”
“Try the fries!” you said eagerly.
“These yellow sticks?” he asked pulling out one fry from the bag, and you giggle once again, he was learning you were quite easy to amuse.
“Yes, the yellow sticks, they’re potatoes with salt and soaked in hot oil to cook them” you smiled.
“That sounds unhealthy” he said, but he surely didn’t pass up the extra meal, and while he’d never admit it, but it was tasty.
“It is on the long run” you agreed. “But you don’t eat these every day. It’s more like… something you eat when you particularly crave it. Like a treat.”
“What’s on your bag?” Loki asked, a lot more agreeable now with a full stomach.
“Ah, you said you didn’t have much to do” you said and passed him bag. “It’s a portable DVD player and old movies.”
“I understood the word portable from that whole sentence” Loki said in an obvious tone.
He wasn’t new to technology, but unlike Earth, Asgard only used technology for practical purposes like travel and fighting. Never for entertainment.
“You can watch recorded over produced plays on the screen” you said adapting to what Loki might be familiar with. “Fury said you can’t have access to internet, so I thought since I don’t use this anymore it’d keep you entertained while Thor negotiates your freedom. And if you need something else, I could surely get it for you.”
Loki was trying to process it all while he followed your instructions to set up the devices you brought him. Now he’d finally give some use to the electricity plugins on his cell.
“Why are you so nice to me?” Loki asked.
“I don’t know” you shrugged. “You seem like you could use some kindness.”
“I’m a charity case?” Loki asked, not sure if he was thankful or offended.
“You wish. If I was charitable, I would’ve brought a fancy brand of fast food, and you’re a good junkyard to bring my old stuff” you snarled, making Loki laugh, for real this time.
Your cheeks flushed and were soon surrounded in a clod of silver mist. And when it disappeared you had vanished already.
Now that… Loki didn’t see coming. He had heard of your kind when he took control of some of SHIELD agents, humans with supernatural abilities. You were a mutant, and for the looks of it, one with teleportation powers. Now it made sense why someone seemingly so ordinary was in a place like this, flirting with a prisoner.
Interesting.
The next few days you kept bringing him food as usual, but two things had changed. One, the portions were bigger now, Loki now got to eat to a point where he was satisfied. Two, you joked around a lot less, in fact, you simply brought the food and stayed nearby in silence, and Loki had caught you staring at him with rosy cheeks.
So, you did fancy him… Truly interesting. And quite flattering too, he at least had to agree you were quite appealing to stare at.
“I watched one of your… Dee Bee Dees…” Loki started the conversation while he ate. “The one with the funny doctor…”
“That… doesn’t narrow it down much” you finally spoke. “Sarcastic asshole with a wounded leg?”
“He is sarcastic, but he treats patients with joy and laughter and goes against the rules. Like the pair of legs at the entrance” Loki specified. “It was a sweet story… I did feel bad for him when he lost his… you know.”
“Ah, yeah…” you said sadly.
For a few more days, the routine kept like that, you seemed a lot shyer than before and now Loki was the one pursuing your attention and with an arsenal of movies you had watched he always had a way to start conversation.
When he was sure he had properly understood your interest in him, he made his move.
While Loki wasn’t as flashy as Thor, he never had much trouble swooning anyone of his interest, with years of etiquette lessons and nourishing his mind with the most exquisite novels and books Asgard had to offer he knew how to charm anyone he desired.
And soon enough he was courting you. He recited for you the collection of the most exquisite verses he had memorized and casted his illusions of roses and butterflies for you to enjoy a romantic set up.
Soon Fury had two people demanding for his liberation. And since Loki had been in his best behavior Fury didn’t have an excuse to keep Loki locked up and while he had a tracker on his ankle and Asgardian magic bracelets capable of suppressing his magic.
You were there when they let Loki out and he made sure to hug you first. The more in love he seemed, the sooner he’d be truly free. You melted against his embrace and wrapped your arms around him in a warm hug.
Loki felt a light tug on his chest. He couldn’t remember the last time someone out of his parents and Thor been so eager and happy to hug him.
“I had been dreaming of this…” you spoke softly. “And your hugs are even cozier than I imagined.”
That felt like a dagger to his heart. Why were you so sweet?
“Alright, Bambi, if you try something your little sweetheart will let us know right away, got it?” Tony warned him.
You wrapped your arms around Loki’s bicep pressing yourself against him.
“He’s gonna be perfect” you defended him. “And if I’m wrong you can lock me up as well for helping a criminal out.”
Second dagger. What kind of idiot were you trusting him so blindly? Could you really not see he just wanted his freedom?
Loki finally had a proper room, or something like that. He would be staying in the Avengers Compound when the Helicarrier landed… until then there was a room where he, Thor, and basically everyone stayed.
Your bed the one right above Loki’s. Loki sighed. Just a few more days. Loki laid down and saw you looking down at him, peeking from your bed with big sparkling eyes.
“Yes?” Loki said in his best sweet loving tone.
“S-Sorry…” you mumbled as your cheeks got red. “I’m just really happy you’re here.”
“Aww, young love…” Kate cooed.
“SHUT UP! I’M OLDER THAN YOU!” you screeched and threw a pillow right at her face, making Loki smiled softly.
“You’re both babies…” Yelena grinned.
“Shut up, you hag!” you and Kate argued.
“You’re all babies…” Bucky corrected.
“DON’T STICK YOUR NOSE, YOU FOSSIL!” the three of you argued.
“I’m… not gonna join this argument being 1,500 years old” Thor laughed and soon eased the mood in all laughter again.
Meanwhile Loki wouldn’t stop thinking what you said to him. “I’m happy you’re here.” Third stab… How could you be so happy and attached to him so easily and quickly?
The next few days he had resigned to adapt to train with you. He had been a warrior all his life, but being a soldier was too boring for him. It was a lot of training, gym workouts, more training, and meetings. He saw you nodding off during the latter. Where did you pull the energy to play and joke around with him when you went to bring food to him while he had been locked up?
You yawned and rested against his shoulder as you dozed off during lunch once. You were so warm and trusted him more than he deserved. You seemed awfully comfortable around him.
Every spare moment you had was dedicated to him, you were awfully cuddly and touchy. Loki wasn’t used to this in the slightest. At first playing along seemed impossible. But your kisses were so gentle and tender, more often than not he found his eyes fluttering close and his hands wrapping around your waist in a loving way. Even sharing a room with a lot of people seemed more fun if he got to study your reactions.
“Take that!” you screamed as you and Kate smacked each other with pillows, but when a stray pillow hit Natasha in the back of the head, it was war.
Everyone was throwing and hitting each other with pillows until someone pushed you to Loki’s arms who had stayed out of the war as just a bystander. No one seemed to be paying much attention to him, but now you were.
Your face was beet red, and you were blabbering apologies if you had hurt him, (which, you hadn’t). But Loki simply smiled and grabbed your sides and started squeezing them, causing you to squeal and burst out laughing.
Oh, of course you were ticklish, he should’ve known. Hel, you irradiated this aura that just screamed “tickle me!” And as the God of Mischief, he was drawn to ticklish little things such as yourself, to make sure he could exploit every ticklish little inch of your giggly body. It had always been a pretty harmless way to ease his need to cause mayhem.
Soon the entire room was in fits of laughter since Loki had unintentionally inspired a tickle war.
“H-Hohohohoney! Pleahahahahase!” you begged Loki, “thahahahahat tickles!”
“So? I hope it doesn’t bother you, my dear” Loki purred in your ear as his fingers traveled up and down your ribs, causing you to screech. “I think I’d like to play with my pretty little toy some more…”
“Nohohohoho! Please! Hehehehehe! S-Stop it!” you giggled until you had proofed to reappear at the top bunk bed, right by the time someone else had surrendered and called truce.
Thor. His stomach was sore from laughing and he needed a break. But the big Asgardian was confident enough to not be affected by being the one to surrender in such harmless play fight.
“I’m nostalgic” Thor laughed. “Reminds me of the sleep overs with Fandral, Volstagg, Hogun and Sif.”
“I wouldn’t know, I was never invited.” Loki said.
“WHAT?!” you gasped and threw a pillow at Thor’s head in Loki’s defense. “JERK! TO YOUR OWN BROTHER!”
“What do you mean?” Thor asked. “You rejected us every time.”
“What are you talking about? You never invited me, brother” Loki explained. “By the time I had found out, you were all locked in your chambers.”
“Sif and the guys always said you said no” Thor said. “That’s why I always made smaller sleepovers with just you and me. I thought you hated big groups.”
Loki never thought Thor had been clueless, if anything he thought it had been him who rejected him, it never occurred to him it was the rest that orchestrated Loki’s exclusion. It made sense in retrospect, they were more Thor’s friends, not Loki’s.
“I enjoy time to myself,” Loki agreed. “But I’ve never been against big events. I always thought it was you who didn’t want me near your friends…”
“Of course not, brother…”
“Don’t feel bad, Loki” Yelena said in a tone that eased the mood. “Nat used to have sleepover with friends and ban me from her room the whole night. But we’re sisters, adopted or not.”
“I said I was sorry, and I was 11 you resentful crybaby!” Natasha argued with a laugh.
You noticed that had hit a sensitive spot-on Loki and went to sit behind Loki to give him a hug from behind. And it was unexpectedly comforting, he sighed as you kissed his cheek. Growing more and more used to your doting affection, you were also rather good to read his mood by now.
It just made him feel more guilty, so he tried changing the subject.
“You poof around when tickled, hm?” Loki chuckled. “Noted.”
“Not just when I’m tickled, when I get worked up by almost anything…” you explained. “I can’t always control it.”
“I see… so, I get you all worked up…” Loki flirted, making you jolt and squeak with a red face. “Heh… I’m flattered.”
“What about you?” you asked when you calmed down, resting your chin on his shoulder. “Does something like that happen to you?”
“Mmm… my magic is also very tied to my feelings is mostly surges of magic when I’m pissed off.” Loki shrugged. “In a way, the source of my magic abilities come from my control of how I feel. Which is why Thor could never learn sorcery… he couldn’t ever keep calm and focus enough.”
It felt a bit of a cheap answer, his guilt told him you were always vulnerable with him. There was another thing…
Alright, now that no one was paying attention to you two.
“When I was little, I used to have a lot of nightmares, and my mother stayed with me and taught me this spell… it allows you to invite someone else to your dreams, to put it simply. She taught me that spell to help me with the bad dreams… And sometimes I still cast it involuntarily while I sleep. It’s… what’s the word? Automatic, at this point.”
“You haven’t used it since we met” you pointed out.
“There’s these preventing that” Loki wiggled the magic cuffs on his wrists, and you shrank sheepishly. “Maybe one day I’ll have you sleep visiting… who knows…”
You smiled too eagerly at the idea… it was painful to see the adoration in your eyes.
The next night you were chatting happily, you laid on the floor with your feet hanging on Loki’s bed. Surprisingly he didn’t mind too much, he found himself much more engaged on the conversation. He simply rested his hand on your shin, caressing it with his thumb.
But at some point during the chat his hand brushed by your ankle, something that should’ve caught his attention way sooner. A location tracker like his. He brushed his fingers along the band, and you jolted, quickly making a bad excuse before rushing out. A terrible liar dating the god of lies. How ironic.
“I didn’t know… I thought I was the only one with one of these…” Loki pointed to his tracker.
“All mutants and non-SHIELD affiliated have one” Tony explained with a yawn. “Basically, if you have superpowers, you have two options, be an agent or an avenger.”
“Or locked up” Loki concluded, and the way no one answered, confirming his suspicion.
“You’re gonna be joining us, right, brother?” Thor smiled.
“Do I have a choice?”
Loki chuckled, he had been thinking about this prior to this information, the fear of actually losing his brother when Thor was ready to leave him forever in Sakaar had been too great.
But what about you? You didn’t strike him the superhero style, a were a fragile and sensitive little thing, and he couldn’t picture you in the battlefield, but being a soldier was clearly taking a huge toll on you. You seemed perpetually exhausted living like this.
“Has my darling decided yet?” Loki asked, he didn’t plan on the pet names, but it felt weirdly natural as it rolled off his tongue. It felt right.
“Not before meeting you, we had tried, but I’d say with you two together… things have changed for the better.” Steve assured him. “It’s a relief though, you two would be great assets in the future, and the life at the compound is bit freer and more independent.”
For some reason, Loki smiled at the sound of that.
“It’s gonna be for the best” Bruce smiled. “Fury can be quite severe, and the soldier life isn’t for everyone…”
Loki couldn’t see you long term here, you’d be overworking yourself for a lifestyle too demanding and that you didn’t even like. It would be for the best to be an Avenger… at least that’d give you some more freedom.
By then, the mood had died down and everyone went to bed, turning off the lights way before you arrived. A few more minutes passed… and nothing. Loki considered going to find you when you opened the door, guiding your way with your phone’s flashlight. You had a messy damp ponytail, and baggy pajamas. You arrived and sat by Loki’s bed and immediately collapsed right beside him, invading his bed. He was ready to climb and use yours when you he felt a tug on his shirt.
“Let me stay with you…” you mumbled with your eyes closed, it seemed you still had some consciousness.
Loki nodded and laid down beside you, wrapping his arm over you, and tucking you under the bedsheets. He had to keep appearances. Yeah… Of course.
He studied you for a while. Your hair was soft, and it smelled like wild berries, shampoo he had started using as well because it smelled so nice. Your skin was soft and smooth, it was addictive to trace his fingers along your body. He traced circles along your side.
“Nooo… thahahat tickles…” you giggled and shifted in your half-asleep state, making something stir within Loki. “You can tickle me all you want in the morning, okay baby…?”
“Ohoho! Is that so?” Loki chuckled. “That’s dangerous thing to offer to the God of Mischief don’t you think?”
“’s okay… I trust you…” you yawned snuggling against his chest.
“Y-You do…?”
“You’d never do anything to hurt me…” you assured him, even with your brain fighting with all it’s might to not succumb to exhaustion.
Once his eyes adapted to the darkness, he stared at your face. Your features were gentle, with a pureness that only a heart that hadn’t been corrupted with cruelness and malice would have. It made him feel weak.
“I love you” you mumbled, kissing his lips before finally falling asleep with the most peaceful smile he had ever seen on anyone that was this close to him.
“I… I love you too…” he whispered and kissed the top of your head.
Now Loki genuinely wanted to stab himself through the chest, he deserved nothing less.
The next morning was the last time he’d be in the Helicarrier for a long time if he could help it. Both of you got the trackers removed and he was officially free. The magic cuffs were taken off of Loki and he immediately summoned a huge illusion that had a radius of a few kilometers as he stretched and showed off.
A huge double rainbow, oh how he had missed using his magic like this. He noticed your eyes sparkling in admiration.
Thor helped him unpack and you two were assigned neighbor bedrooms so the lovey dovey couple could stay close. You seemed ecstatic, you set your room and invited him to see it.
It was very much what he expected from you. Cozy and cute, just being inside made him want to lay down on your bed and sleep. And of course you had a pile of stuffed animals. He laid back on your bed, sinking in the mattress and fluffy covers.
Adorable.
“Honey bunny, I’m gonna go to the city alone today… don’t follow me” you warned him and proofed away before reappearing for a second. “And don’t snoop around my stuff! Love ya!”
And you disappeared in a gust of silvery white mist. Loki napped on your bed for a while, but… he couldn’t resist, he was curious by nature. He walked by your desk and saw the mirror of had a bunch of photos of him stuck to the board, he wasn’t smiling in any of them, and most had been taken him by surprise. Loki would’ve thought it weird, but the two of you were dating. And you only did what was normal for someone in a relationship. He smiled softly at how purely infatuated you were.
“Loki!” you called for him, so you had returned. He went to find you.
You had smiled so brightly as you jumped to his arms and showered his face in loving smooches.
“I missed you!” you smiled between kisses.
“You just left an hour or so…” he chuckled.
“It’s still too much time away from you!” you snuggled with him. “I missed this pretty face.”
“Heh…” he chuckled.
“I bought us something.” You smiled and handed him a golden bracelet with a round item on the middle. You kept the silver one. “It’s a distance touch bracelet.”
You touched your bracelet, and he felt his buzzing. Oh. He knew this couldn’t have been cheap. And you still didn’t hesitate to get it for him.
“Now you can feel me close, even if I vanish, or if we can’t be with each other.” You giggled.
His heart fluttered. How could there be someone so overly sweet? To him, of all people.
“Thank you…” he smiled.
Days passed and Loki’s sanity was evaporating in thin air. Guilt was eating him alive.
You were in truly, madly, and hopelessly in love with him. You wanted nothing but the best for him and you always showered him with love, affection and the sweetest kisses he had ever tasted. And worst of it all, he was falling in love with you. He deserved no love from you, but he had it… And it filled his heart with a warmth he didn’t deserve. Oh, you poor lovely thing, if you only knew how cruel his intentions had been to start your relationship.
He did what you wanted now, trying to make up for it. He didn’t want you to feel like you did all the job in a relationship anymore. Soon the photos were more couple y, of kisses and hugs, Loki took photos of you more as well. He invited you to read and nap with him.
He tickled you lots, and making you giggle in his arms as he held you close. He hugged you tight, trying to squeeze in all the love he had develop for the kind soul that had been nothing but sweet to him. In a wordless pray for your forgiveness.
He did everything that occurred to him would make you happy.
“No way! You’re ticklish?!” you gasped with an ear-to-ear grin.
“Terribly so, I can’t stand being ticked in between my ribs” he smiled as he rested his chin on your head, with you sitting on his lap. “My magic acts up on its own if I get overwhelmed, like you.”
“Really?” you giggled and caressed his sides. “Can I try?”
“For a kiss…” he smiled and puckered his lips for a smooch, which you complied with a huge grin. “I adore you… Fine, you got one minute to tickle my ribs.”
“Just one minute?” you whined with that lovely smile of yours.
“Thirty seconds?” he smiled.
“Eh?!” you whined. “One minute!”
“See how convincing I am?” he grinned.
“Oh, you—” you said and turned around to start poking and prodding his ribs, Loki couldn’t help but burst out laughing.
“Ack! Hehehehe!” he whined, you were too good at this, he was laughing his heart out. “S-Stohohohop! Hehehehe! I-It’s been a minute! Hahaha! S-Stop!”
“I’m not done with you, you pretty tease!” you giggled and kept prodding between his ribs.
“Oh yeheheah?!” he laughed and skittered his fingers along your belly.
You were squealing and giggling in the blink of an eye. But you didn’t stop tickling him.
“Hehehehe! Hic! G-Give up!” you giggled and squirmed as you prodded his sides.
“You give up! Hahahahaha!” he giggled squeezed your tummy and skittered his fingers along your armpits.
“Ack! Noohohohoho!” you whine and squeezed above his kneecaps, making him jump and ergo you fell off his lap and onto the couch.
“You’re in trouble…” he grinned and his fingers, poked, drilled, kneaded and scratch over every sensitive spot on your body, and it didn’t matter if you gave up. He didn’t stop until you were breathless.
Only then he stopped and held you in his arms.
“Remind me to not tickle you again, you’re sadistic” you smiled.
“You know it, darling…” he smiled and kissed the top of your head. “Did you have fun?”
“Mhm…” you smiled and leaned against him. “I love you.”
You were beyond ecstatic. You melted under all of his affection and more time he spent with you, the more he couldn’t deny his feelings for you.
He did it everything he could to make you happy. But nothing he did alleviated his guilt. He could only imagine the amount of heartache you would feel if you found out he had only used you to try looking better adjusted and be free, and that he had pretended to fall in love.
He couldn’t eat, he couldn’t sleep. He was going insane. He walked around the compound like a ghost during the night. He did a stop to throw up in the toilet.
“You’re awake,” you surprised him despite your gentle tone. “Is something bothering you?”
“N-No, love. I just wasn’t feeling very tired.” He assured you. “Don’t worry. Go back to sleep.”
You placed your hands on his hips and leaned closer to him the way you did whenever you were going to kiss him. But you took a little sniff—probably smelling his bad breath—you stopped and smiled at him with kindness.
“Mmm… Insomnia, hm?” you smiled and pulled him to the kitchen. “I know just the cure.”
You heated up water and prepared him a tea with honey. The warmth of the drink ran through him as the sweet drink got rid of the bad taste, and he sighed a tear streaming down his face.
“What’s wrong?” you asked, cupping his face.
“I’ve done so many awful things… And…” he spoke softly. “I don’t know how to fix them… I don’t deserve any forgiveness…”
“Oh Loki…” you hugged him. “No one blames you… you didn’t mean it… I’ve seen your pretty heart, and you deserve all the love in the world… Gosh, if I could take all the pain, you’re feeling for myself, I would.”
“Please don’t say that…” he begged. He couldn’t handle anymore guilt, but he didn’t know how to tell you the truth.
You gently guided him to your bedroom and tucked him in your bed, wrapping your arms around him in a protective way.
“Forgive me love... Please forgive me…” he begged between mutters. “I take it all back… please… Please don’t hate me… please…”
“Shh…” you whispered, running your fingers through his hair. “It’s all gonna be okay… I’m always gonna be here for you.”
               Between the warm tea, his exhaustion, the previous sleepless nights, your comfortable bed, and your loving touch… his body gave up on him and he fell asleep.
Everything was dark, and cold, covered in ice and a cruel wind. Loki had a good tolerance to cold, but he was freezing.
“Monster…” a voice echoed so loudly it made Loki’s ears ring. It was his own voice and it came from everywhere around him.
“Traitorous rat…”
“Murderer…”
“Beast…”
“Liar…”
“Frost giant…”
“Monster…”
“Manipulator…”
“Liar…”
“We finally had someone’s trust…”
“Of course, you just play around with others!”
Loki was completely surrounded by copies of himself, all at least twice his size, blue skin, Jotun attire, and eyes red like blood. True frost giants.
Loki simply took every blow and insult. He deserved them.
“Loki…?” a different voice called. “Is this what you meant by inviting someone to your dreams?”
No please… you couldn’t be here.
“Darling… wake up… please don’t be here…” Loki begged you. “Please…”
“I’m not leaving you here on your own…” you spoke and kneeled beside him.
Loki felt his body change, every muscle vanished leaving him as practically skin and bones. Small. Weak.
“Loki… what’s going on?! What’s happening to you?!”
Loki tried to shapeshift back to his natural look, but he had no control of his own body. At this point in life, he should be desensitized to nightmares where his magic didn’t obey him… but…
“Please… leave me here…” he spoke as he could, but he could barely hear himself.
“Don’t say that... What’s… what can I do for you?”
There was something about dreams, and especially Loki’s dreams, that always seemed to be extra dramatic. It must have been so confusing to be in one as an outsider.
Loki’s body changed again, he grew twice his usual size, and his body was blue and muscled. Exactly the body of a Jotun.
“STOP BEING SO GOOD TO ME! CAN’T YOU SEE I DON’T LOVE YOU?!”
“What?!”
What?! No! That wasn’t true…
Loki tried to take it back, but he was in autopilot. He was in the passenger seat of his own mind.
“I DON’T LOVE YOU! ARE YOU THAT GULLIBE TO THINK I’D FALL IN LOVE WITH A MORTAL?! I HAVE BEEN USING YOU!”
“No… no, you're not… You wouldn’t…”
“I JUST NEEDED A COVER, TO SEEM WELL ADJUSTED ENOUGH TO NOT BE A PRISONER! AND YOU WERE ANNOYING ENOUGH TO BARGE IN DEFENSE OF ME! I’V BEEN PLAYING WITH YOU FROM DAY ONE! DON’T YOU SEE YOU ARE JUST A TOY?! YOU’RE PATHETIC!”
The look on your face was heartbreaking. You looked crushed.
“I HAVE BEEN THINKING OF A WAY TO GET RID OF YOU! I CAN’T SLEEP AND I WANT TO THROW UP THINKING I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH YOU YET ANOTHER DAY!”
You curled up on the floor and Loki lifted you but your collar’s shirt.
“GET IT INSIDE YOUR HEAD! I COULD NEVER LOVE A MORTAL AS UNNERVING AS YOU!” Loki screamed at you before slamming you against the floor.
“NO!” Loki sat up with a gasp and his body drenched in sweat. He looked around and saw you curled up on the bed, your back facing him. “Love?! Thank goodness… I’m so— Love, w-what’s wrong…?”
You were stiff and you had a hand on the back of your head. Loki shifted and stretched a bit and saw your face. Your eyes were full of tears, yet he had never seen you with such a cold expression in your face.
“My love… and what’s wrong?” Loki placed a hand over your arm, and you slapped it.
“Why did you say that?” you asked him.
“I d-don’t know… I wasn’t… I didn’t…” Loki stuttered. “My dreams are like that…”
“No. I mean, what you said was really specific. Why…?”
“I don’t—I don’t know why I—”
“Tell me the truth, Loki.” You ordered him. “Did you, or did you not pretend to love me for your freedom?”
Loki stayed quiet. He didn’t have the courage to tell you the truth, but he didn’t have the heart to keep lying to you. With that confirmation tears started falling down your cheeks again.
“Y-Yes but I—that was before…”
“Get out…” you spoke.
“What? No, darling, listen… I…”
“I don’t want to hear you.”
“Please love… let me explain…” he tried holding you.
That made you snap. You started hitting him, being a human it was impossible for you to harm him, but not once in his life had he felt more pain.
“DON’T TOUCH ME! DON’T TALK TO ME!”
“Darling please…”
“I DON’T WANNA SEE YOU EVER AGAIN! GET OUT OF MY ROOM AND GET OUT OF MY LIFE!”
He had no strength to fight you, he was defenseless as you kicked him out of your room, slamming the door on his face.
There were a few faces popping out of their door to try seeing what had happened and that quickly retreated back to their rooms. Loki had no choice but to go inside of his own bedroom.
The next morning, he nearly tripped on his way out with a box by is door. It was full of books, quills, a coat, photos of you together. And… the silver bracelet that matched his own. It tore his heart to shreds. He didn’t feel as guilty anymore. But remorse and the memory of how brokenhearted you looked was even more sadistic. He heard you crying often from across the wall.
A few days later the others started giving him dirty looks. Knowing you and considering that this didn’t happen right away he assumed they had found out after heavy interrogation and now everyone knew he had used you. Even Thor seemed upset, not angry, but he had this… disappointment in his eyes.
“I hate dealing with moving companies” Tony sighed as they all sat for dinner. “But Fury wants to have our little Houdini enlisted by the end of the week. It’s a shame… The kiddos enjoyed being around each other.”
“Tell me about it” Clint sighed. “Kate is devastated.”
“Speaking of devastated…” Natasha said as she stood up, and Loki would’ve sworn she was shooting daggers at him with that glare. “See if I can be more convincing about eating something, otherwise Fury will have a corpse enlisting.”
You were moving out? To become a SHIELD agent? But you hated being a soldier. Had he hurt you so bad that you preferred that lifestyle and ruin your life forever… than being around him?
This all felt awfully familiar. Loki excused himself and went to his room and lock himself inside. He closed his eyes, and part of him wished that they’d never open again.
“Am I cursed?” Loki asked, choked up by the last bit of hope.
“No.” Odin responded the worst thing he could've said him. A curse would've been better.
Loki placed the casket down, weakly, it suddenly felt like a very... very heavy thing to carry. And the weight stayed there, right on his chest even after the casket had been placed back at the pedestal.
“Then what am I?” Loki asked softly, afraid of the answer.
“You're my son.” Odin answered, and Loki doubted his own magic since he couldn't detect dishonesty in his father's words.
Clearly that was a lie. So why didn’t his magic detect that? Loki felt rage spiral out of control like a boiling pot.
“What more than that?” Loki growled, still trying to keep his composure as he walked towards his father that was by the stairs at the other side of the corridor. “The Casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day, was it?”
Odin looked him in the eye. Unable to deny it any longer. It had been to many years with that secret. As Loki walked closer, Odin just started at him in silence as Loki reached the stairs.
“No.” Odin finally said. “In the aftermath of the battle, I went into the Temple, and I found a baby. Small for a giant's offspring— abandoned, suffering, left to die. Laufey's son.”
That felt like a dagger piercing the young prince’s heart. Out of all the things he was insecure about, it turned out he WAS an outsider. Out of all the things he could’ve been, he HAD to be a Jotun, a monster. Out of all the Jotun’s in existence, he was the son of the worst of them all. And out of all the reasons he could’ve been adopted for, was because even his own biological family didn’t want him… and his adopted family never told him any of this.
“Laufey's son...?” Loki finally managed to gasp out, he was choking up on his own tears. “Why? You were knee-deep in Jotun blood. Why would you take me?”
“You were an innocent child.” Odin said, sounding more exhausted by the second.
“No!” Loki begged his father, knowing that Odin was a strategic warrior. There was always a meaning behind his actions. “You took me for a purpose, what was it?”
But Odin didn’t answer. The physical toll of delaying his Odin sleep to prepare Thor to rule, preventing a war, the emotional toll of having to banish Thor and now… having his youngest child doubt his love for him because of his foolish decision of not telling him the truth earlier were overwhelming him.
The All-King saw with pain how the little child that once smiled at him with love when he picked him in his arms after the battle now saw him with fear, pain, and resentment.
“TELL ME!” Loki demanded loudly, no longer capable of remaining calm.
“I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day, bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace... through you.” Odin confessed.
That was the final blow to Loki’s poor heart.
“What…?”
A tool. All he had been adopted for was as an instrument of peace between Asgard and a race that everyone saw as blood-thirsty monsters.
“But those plans no longer matter.” Odin clarified.
“So, I am no more than another stolen relic, locked up… here, until you might have use of me.” Loki inquired in pain.
“Why do you twist my words?” Odin asked softly.
“You could have told me what I was from the beginning.” Loki urged, desperate to makes sense of what easily was the worst day of his life. “Why didn't you?!”
“You are my son. I wanted only to protect you from the truth.” Odin said softly, in a fruitless attempt to calm his poor child’s heart.
“Wh— B-Because I-I-I am the monster parents tell their children about at night?!” Loki asked, flooded by all the scary stories about the frost giants growing up. All those times he and Thor played heroes as kids fighting those monsters.
“Don't...” Odin begged as his strength slowly abandoned him.
But Loki couldn’t listen anymore. The grief was too great, and the feeling of betrayal didn’t allow him to trust Odin anymore.
“It all makes sense now! Why you favored Thor all these years.” Loki yelled as he started walking up the stairs to yell at Odin as the All-Father slowly lost his strength and started passing out on the stairs. “Because no matter how much you claim to “love” me, you could never have a Frost Giant sitting on the Throne of Asgard!”
Odin kept trying until his last second of consciousness to beg his son for help, forgiveness… anything. But he had been too weakened to dedicate his young boy some kind of love or reassurance as he fell prey to the Odin sleep, he had delaying for so long.
Now Loki encountered a similar dilemma. He had been stupid, dishonest, and selfish to someone who offered him nothing but unconditional love. He betrayed your trust and there was no way now that Loki could prove that despite his original intentions his love wasn’t any less real.
He laid down on his bed, with his arm draped dramatically over his eyes.
“Troubled, my son?” a voice spoke making Loki sit up.
“Father” Loki smiled softly. “I ruined it. I had the most beautiful love in my life… and I was stupid and lost it because of my own selfishness.”
“That sounds familiar” Odin chuckled. “You truly are my son, after all.”
“You had always been will always be my father…” Loki said the words he had denied for several years. “I never understand your reasons. Cruel as they were…”
“Not holding back against your old father, hm?” Odin laughed.
“Sorry…” Loki smiled softly.
“My original reasons were foolish, selfish, and even cruel as you rightfully… but I always hoped to do what would be best for the 9 Realms” he spoke. “But that didn’t mean the love I had for you wasn’t any less real. You are my son, regardless of the kind of blood that coursed through your veins.”
Loki smiled softly; it was weird. He knew Odin would have never say all that. But now, after growing up so much, he understood it wasn’t because he didn’t feel it, he had always been too proud and formal, too much of a king. And while imperfect, it was still his father.
“That’s why you never caught me lying when I called you my son or said that I loved you.” Odin spoke. “In my heart, you’ve always been my son.”
“I know, father” Loki smiled. “I’m sorry it took me so long to understand it.”
“I’m sorry I never told you before… I feared you wouldn’t take it well…”
“Me? I would never” Loki joked softly.
“We always loved you as our own” a female voice added making Loki turned around.
“Mother.” Loki spoke breathless. “I know… I know… I knew, I was just too scared I could’ve been wrong, and you didn’t…”
“You were too much of a charming kid not to love you” Frigga said compassionately. “Your little human surely thinks so too.”
Ah… that… Loki wasn’t so sure.
“I ruined it, I deserve nothing but the hatred and disgust I’ve earned from my darling.” Loki huffed out. “I manipulated, lied, and destroyed the trust of my love.”
“Dear, there’s nothing final in these matters…” Frigga smiled softly. “If that loved blossomed once, you may rescue it and nourish it again. But first… you need to apologize.”
“I don’t think I’m wanted anywhere near hearing range.” Loki explained.
“Do you think the love between your mother, and I always had a perfect relationship?” Odin smiled.
“Your father was too temperamental for that” Frigga intervened with a smile and both parents looked at each other with love. “But when you truly love someone and you make a mistake, you swallow your pride and make up for your wrongdoings.”
Loki smiled softly, he remembered it well. When Odin’s temper got the best of him because of the stress of being a king, Odin made sure to make up for Frigga know how truly sorry he was, and Frigga who already knew her husband’s temper was an expert on not letting her affect her, knowing it was never personal. She had truly been blessed with infinite patience given she dealt with three men with bad tempers and yet her kindness and loving nature knew no end. It was not rare to see Odin gifting Frigga fancy gifts and spend long hours apologizing and dedicating the day to her. It wasn’t the perfect arrangement, but no relationship was.
Loki chuckled softly.
“Thanks…” he smiled and both parents tended a hand to him with a smile. “I know what I have to do.”
Ready to say goodbye, Loki placed his hands on top of Odin and Frigga’s, and with that, the figure of his parents faded under a green light as Loki’s palms stopped glowing. Loki let out a little laugh as he wiped his tears.
His illusions had never been so benevolent towards himself, they were either torturous or for a fake sense of gloating and dissociation. But your compassion had changed him forever. He could use them for closure and to guide him with the stuff he knew but needed to hear. And… you deserved that at least.
He got up and went outside and went to a trip. It took him around an hour to get to the city and a couple more hours to get his several stops get several gifts. A lovely white bouquet of flowers, a box of your favorite chocolates, a necklace with a cute silver heart shaped locket and got it printed with a small photo, a copy of a photo he had carried from one of your first “dates” you got where you were giving him a small kiss in the cheek and cupped the other one, a symbol of your shared love.
On his way back, Loki held the original photo close to his chest and sighed. He prayed this would work as he was on his way to see you. He knocked on your door and hid his gifts behind himself, not even remembering he could’ve concealed them with his magic from how nervous he was.
His chest tightened as you opened the door, your eyes and nose were red, and your cheeks were stained with tears. Oh Norns… He had hurt you really bad.
“Love… Please… let me explain” Loki spoke softly.
“What do you need to explain, Loki?” you asked and sniffled, practically murdering him when you called him Loki instead of one of your lovely cheesy pet names. “That I was just a toy for you to play with and pretend that you loved me, so you’d be a free man? I got that quite clearly.”
You were ready to slam the door on his face, but he reached his leg to stop you. He nearly dropped one of your gifts. You looked at him confused, eying him up and down before sighing in defeat, opening the door he walked inside of your little room. He saw the little night table covered with used tissues and the bed’s decorative cushions were all over the place. It broke his heart.
“What do you want, Loki?” you asked tiredly as you sat on the bed, placing a cushion on your lap and against your chest.
“My darling, I was the biggest, most cruel and inconsiderate imbecile of all 9 Realms” he said, kneeling before you as he handed you the bouquet of flowers. You gently placed the flowers on your lap, still looking at him.
“It is true, that I was looking to just find a relationship to pretend I had adapted to living on earth” he spoke. “It was a selfish, shallow, and dishonest reason to make you mine… But I did it. It was heartless and there’s no excuse or reason for you to forgive that. But I beg of you to stay here… never speak to me again if you need, but don’t settle to a life of misery just to avoid me. I will happily accept being locked up in a dungeon for a hundred years, so you don’t see the likes of me again…”
He handed you the chocolate, and your gaze softened for a second as you saw the chocolate, he remembered which ones you liked the most. You opened your mouth to speak, but a gentle squeeze to your hands let you know Loki still wanted to speak.
He had caused all of this for not telling you the truth, and now he wanted to fully bare his soul to you now.
“You offered me boundless kindness, patience despite my flaws, understanding to my pain and sins of the past, laughter like I hadn’t enjoyed before, you fed with the most delicious and warm foods I had ever eaten, you showed me the concept of dates and you bared me completely vulnerable to your touch and heart and you bared yourself completely to me without fear of me…” Loki continued, as tears streamed down his face, drowning in regret. “And all I did was play with you and betray the trust your selfless heart gave me without asking for anything in return.”
He placed his forehead on your knees and sobbed, completely ashamed of what he had done to you. He didn’t deserve your forgiveness, but he felt like he’d die without you. And he’ deserve it.
“I don’t care” you finally spoke, and he looked up, he saw the tears streaming down your face. “You’re the God of Mischief and Lies, there are countless stories of how you lied and manipulated to get away with anything you wanted… I should’ve expected I’d be just that.”
“No— No, darling!” Loki held your hands and pressed his lips against your knuckles. “No, my sweet, you— I was selfish. I wanted a cover up, yes, but what I found was love, I found the butterflies in my stomach you always speak of. I found the warm of your hands lingering on my skin after our dates. I found myself awake during the night sighing over those lovely eyes I’ve now so cruelly filled with tears…” Loki spoke softly.
You were shaking in your place as you did your best not to cry and interrupt him. He brushed his finger along your cheek as in appreciation of your effort.
“None of what you heard that night was true in my heart…” he assured you “I never felt so disgusted I wanted to vomit; it was guilt that was killing me from the inside… knowing I was hurting such a beautiful flower.”
He handed you the heart locket and you opened it, seeing the photo made you sob as silently as you could.
“I was selfish and a liar. I don’t blame you if you don’t believe me and want nothing to do with me again. But please know that my heart beats for and because of you only.” He spoke. “I fell hopelessly and irredeemably in love with you. I swear that on my life.”
You looked at him and smiled, as you wrapped your arms around his neck and sobbed now freely and unrestrained. Time seemed to stop for Loki as he hugged you back, taking in your scent and caressing you. Tears fell down his face and he held you, afraid you’d disappear if he let go of you.
You forgave him. He didn’t think he’d ever be so lucky to find a kind soul that would forgive even his worst mistake. But he found it, you were kind enough to do so. Your wrapped your arms around him in a warm hug and Loki was able to let all the pain and guilt go… He couldn’t undo his mistakes, but he could be better, and he wanted to be his best self for you.
“Thank you… Norns, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” he repeated over and over between whispers and tears as he held you tight.
You sat up straight and cupped his face and laughed softly as you still cried happy tears.
“You’re gonna have to buy me a new box of tissues, you booger” you joked softly with a sniffle, and pressed your forehead to his and grabbed a tissue to blow your nose.
“I’ll give you the entire world if you so desire, my love” he spoke with a gentle smile. “Just say the word.”
“I don’t need the world” you smiled and kissed his cheek. “I have everything I need right here.”
“What did I do to deserve you?” he chuckled softly as he grabbed a tissue to wipe his tears and blow his nose. “I’m a disaster and somehow I still found the most precious little dove all for myself.”
You held him tightly in a hug… in silence for a few minutes before you spoke again.
“Did you think I was annoying when we first met?” you asked with a stern look on your face. “I want the truth.”
“Truthfully… you were a nightmare…” Loki admitted in a soft playful tone.
“HEY!” you whined and dug your fingers into the crevices of his ribs making him burst out laughing. “I said honest, not mean!”
“Ehehehe! Lohohohohove, let me finish!” he giggled, letting you have this, it was the least he could do. “P-Please, s-stohohohop that! Not there!”
You smiled and went to tickle his belly. Oh, you had really not liked that.
“Plehehehehehease, dahahaharling! I surrender!” he laughed and did his best to not squirm.
“Fine… what is it?” you asked, as you sat sideways on his lap, already happily cuddling with him.
Thank whatever superior force that was out there… Oh, you’re a wonderful blessing.
“You’re a nightmare turned into a dream” he clarified and he didn’t even bother fighting the urge to squeeze you tightly.
“You have 3 seconds to explain how that’s a compliment o I’ll tickle you until you puncture a lung.”
“Ihihi— I mean like, when you start having a bad dream… but it turns around as the most wonderful of dreams, those that you still think about after waking up.” Loki said, and as those words he was sure he had fried his brain because he didn’t make any sense.
But that was enough for you.
“You’re lucky you’re cute.” You grumbled.
“C’mon… don’t be mad at me for being foolish and wrong” he smiled as he squeezed you tight. “Surely you thought I was insufferable at first as well, we’re so different after all.”
You smiled and shook your head.
“I love my pretty prince” you smiled and picked a tissue yourself to clean your face. “Flaws, differences, and all.”
“Do you, now?” he grinned cheekily. “I sure am a lucky one to be called yours.”
“A Loki one” you giggled, and Loki made a scowl of disgust. “Sorry! I thought it too late when I said it and— hehehe!”
“Oh, that was awful— C’mere… you!”
“W-What?! NO! NOHOHOHOHO! LOHOHOHOKI, STOP IHIHIHIT!”
As he made you laugh and held you against him, he couldn’t doubt how fortunate he was to be so undoubtedly yours.
| MASTERPOST |
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sunkissed-zegras · 7 hours
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Omg omg omg I just thought about uconn wbb team with their manager on live moments. Can we get a headcannon or fic for this?
I like to think that despite being the manager, she is best friends with the team and tends to be with them (they totally didn’t pull her from her work cuz she works so much noooooo, not at all)
(^ this could also possible be why people are suspicious of she has something going on with one of the team members cuz she’s almost ALWAYS with them even outside of school and it’s to a point where ppl are like “um🤨 she’s around y’all a lot to JUST be a manager.”Just food for thought👀)
BUT IN THIS CASE, as i mentioned before we can’t expect manager-baby to be in tiktok’s and other videos and just (somehow) not being pulled into their live shenanigans.
BUT this is where people see a. just how done the manager is with the girls and b. THEIR PERSONALITY
I guarentee the girls always say how the manager is like “she’s very witty/sarcastic/a smartass/sweet/hyper.” and ppl at first are like “??? you mean that manager with a mean ass death stare?? no way.” And this is where the live moments come through.
You can really see how much she cherishes the team and her bond with them, and no matter how much they may bicker and tease eachother. They love one another.
There’s 100% a tiktok compilation of the manager being sassy/a smartass in lives you cannot convince me otherwise. Also I think manager has a MEAN ass side eye.
Along the sweetness you can also see how much they fuckin bicker.
“KK, you’re delulu with or without a man involved.”
KK: “Okay you’re off the live.” *shifts camera*
—-
“Paige you have the confidence of a much taller woman.”
Paige: “Bro I’m LITERALLY taller than you.”
“That’s what makes it more embarrassing.”
——-
Also, THE TEAM PULLS OUT MANAGERS SOFT SIDE!!!! Manager may be strict but is very sweet and loving. I also personally headcannon that they’re one of those people that call their friends pet names like “baby” “babes” “darling” “love” “sugar” “pumpkin” etc. on instinct cuz of their sweet nature. And it’s not like they’re TRYING to fluster people, it’s just what they do. Manager loves platonic love!!!! They’re also the girls safe place.
Manager can’t help but melt when it comes to the team because she just cares for them so much and they just easily take away her tough guy mask.
Also more rare clips of manager lowkey (high key) flirting with the team, which is something she tends to do off camera but sometimes slips out when the cameras rolling. (There’s 100% someone on the team that calls the manager their wife. The “yall argue like a married couple.” people)
-🐹
yes, nonnie!! manager is really close with the team because she's known them for so long and she spends sooo much time with them, it's kinda bound to happen
at first i feel like people would not like manager just because she's the friendilest (AT FIRST!!!!) but when they begin to make tik toks/do lives with her, everyone falls in love with her!!!!!!!
she's very much the glue of the team and like, she has a dynamic with everyone on the team. her and nika are like BEST friends, kk and her have a little/older sister dynamic, paige and her have an old married couple dynamic, so on and so forth. every loves a good dynamic so everyone just falls in love with her!!
oh my god, YES. she becomes a staple in UConn "fandom" bc like, she's just so iconic like??? there's like a million compilations of manager side eyeing people bc its sooo funny
the whole petname thing is SO real, thats also why people start to believe that she's dating one of the players😭😭 ALSO, when she meets fans and stuff, she will call them petnames (again cus it's like normal for her) and again people just fall in love w her
there are more random manager headcanons coming soon promise 🫶🏼
SEND MORE THOUGHTS, I LOVE READING THEMMMMM!!!!!!
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So I Spied Another Day...
You know it was a good show when you can’t decide whether your heart is so full from all the love and joy, or so empty because it's over.
Really do buckle up, because this is a long one.
So the show went a little like this. They played the Spies pro-shoot on a giant movie screen, but any time a song started, the audio changed to the instrumental track, the video typically faded to simple background graphics, and the cast came out to perform the number live in concert style. There were also a series of audience participation prompts up on the movie screen, such as standing to deliver a line in unison, giving Lauren a standing ovation for the Pay Attention! Reprise, enthusiastically booing Dr. Baron von Nazi and the still infuriatingly catchy Not So Bad (for anyone who’s curious, in addition to encouraging boos and yelled disagreements with von Nazi, they also cut the audience participation bit from the song).
The energy in the room was so electric and full of joy and warmth. People shouted out iconic lines, went wild for everyone’s entrances, and absolutely lost their damn minds over Curtwen at pretty much every opportunity. And the cast were clearly having just as much fun. Doing This has always been my favorite, and there was something so sweet about them singing it again all these years later. We finally got Joey performing Spies Are Forever (Evil Reprise) again and it was just as chilling and beautiful as you’d expect. And One Step Ahead was just on a whole new level. I don’t want to give anything away, but the details in that performance were INCREDIBLE.
It was simply so special seeing most of the original gang come back while also bringing some new friends along. Shout out to Mariah for coming out at the top of the show so ready to play, setting the tone for the whole evening. Shout out to James for putting his comedy chops on full display (LET JAMES BE FUNNY MORE) and dancing the hell out of One More Shot (another favorite number). And shoutout to Carlos Alazraqui (taking over the roles of Sergio and Vladimir Poopin) and Tommy Link for coming into this crazy part of our world with such enthusiasm and silliness. Brian deserves a medal for agreeing to once again play the most cringe-worthy character in all of Pulp-StarCanWrecked history, and for sounding so fucking good while doing it. Tessa was having a blast in full unhinged glory and I gladly worship at her altar. Lauren is maybe the funniest person alive and deserved her standing ovation, prompted or not. Seeing Joe Walker perform live has been Item Number One on my fandom bucket list since I moved to LA a couple of years ago, and I still can’t quite believe I managed it. I’d wondered if he’d be rusty, but honestly he sounded great; it was like no time had passed. Mary Kate still has one of my all-time favorite voices and her Tatiana remains forever engaging. Joey showed up dressed to slay as a gay evil genius Bond-movie supervillain and proceeded to thoroughly deliver on that promise. And Curt… every time I watch Spies I am increasingly blown away by what he does with this arrogant, broken mess of a character. He clearly loves Agent Mega as much as any of us, and to see a performance refined and powered by such clear and thoughtful passion is just a huge treat.
(And while he wasn’t in the cast, I can’t not mention Corey. Between his roles as director and co-writer, so much of what Spies is comes directly from him and we don’t appreciate that nearly enough. And shout out to Esther Fallick for her wonderful work as Susan and the Informant. She might not have been there in person, but her incredible performance was with us the whole time.)
I know this is preaching to the choir, but Spies Are Forever really is such a special show. It’s a story about recovery, and devastating as it can be, I think there’s also something deeply healing about it at its core. For one thing, I know it played a huge role in mending my relationship with my asexuality. I will forever be grateful to it for existing, to TCB, Talkfine, and the original cast for creating it, and to those same people for maintaining its legacy with the amount of love and care it deserves. It was a privilege to be in the room as so many people came to celebrate this miraculous little musical. There were a couple of minor tech glitches (I wonder if they’ll even include the “big one”—the projector jumping over most of the staircase scene before getting fixed—in the digital ticket version), but nothing that could even begin to damper the magic of the night.
We all know that spies never die (except for Owen and the Informant, oops). And at times like this concert, I think this special little show with its short run in 2016 will prove to be just as immortal.
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I just had some Isastegi Cider that my local store had in it's wine section for a while. It was pretty good but very different from the local hard ciders i've had, dry or sweet. Is Cider a popular drink in the Basque Country? Or is this "American has Basque Cider, thinks all Basque people love cider"?
Kaixo anon!
Omg, of course! Cider is one important piece in our culture! In fact, until the 19th century cider was the only everyday drink for most Basques here in the coastal regions of EH because wine - produced in the plains - had to travel through the mountains via very bad roads, which made its transport slow and dangerous, which made wine so expensive only wealthy people could afford it.
Basque sailors would bring cider in their ships - water would have gone off - in their voyages to Greenland and Canada to hunt whales. And fun fact, Astigarraga (Gipuzkoa) is known as the cider capital of the world because it features a museum devoted to Basque cider and cider-making, there's one cider house for every 230 people and every 0.5km2, the highest ratios in the world.
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Basque cider - in Euskara sagardo or apple wine - is flat and has no sugar added. It's made just with Basque apple varieties. It's a bit more sour than any other given cider, but in return it's more aromatic and light golden.
Cider is still an everyday drink - mostly with meals - in many Basque homes, but the cider season (from January to April) is when the cider from the latest harvest can be tasted and it's like a social event in EH, mostly in Gipuzkoa. And it's not something new! There are some theories that defend our traditional instrument txalaparta - known to be heard from miles away in certain conditions - was born as a call to cider season!
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We call this time of the year txotx season! And what's txotx? Well, cider is kept in huuuuuge barrels called kupelak, like these:
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Each one holds a different kind of cider: sweeter, drier, depending on the varieties used. When you go to a Basque cider house, one of the servers there will randomly shout: txotx!! and open one of these kupelak. People will stand up quickly with their glasses, ready to taste the cider and go back to eat; then, sometime later, txotx! Another kupela is open and another cider is available to taste!
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Cider has to do txinparta, some sorte of "be broken", this is, the liquid has to be served from a certain distance and height, rebound first on the side of the glass and then onto the bottom, so all flavors and smells can truly be enjoyed. If you're drinking from a bottle, the same applies: it'll taste as it should when served from a height and after the rebounds on the glass. Not too cold, though! Just around 10-12ºC, and NO ICE.
Last year, EH produced around 12 million litres of cider, and its production increases every year.
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elred001 · 3 days
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(This may be uncomfortable for some people. Please be very careful and proceed with discretion. Hugs and kisses for everyone)
I really don't think you guys understand how obsessed I am with BuckTommy. A month ago I had no more than 100 9-1-1 bookmarks in ao3 and now I'm over 350, all the new ones being about them.
I'm autistic, I have ADHD, I'm asexual and coming to that realization was one of the most precious and liberating moments of my life. Lists are everything to me, they are the definers of my life. I have a hard time understanding social subtleties and metaphorical language, and my biggest drawback that autism brought me was my incompetence to regulate and understand emotions. Mine or others. So I had this huge list of what emotional attraction and/or interest is supposed to feel like, and how my body is supposed to react around those I'm attracted to or like or love, so it was such a mess and an absolute pain that every time someone touched me intimately it felt like ants were running across my skin and biting into my flesh. And I cried a lot about it, and I screamed and I had fits of anger that I didn't understand at all and my parents hugged me to calm me down but that only made it worse because, tact. Touch. Awful. I made myself do things I hated because I thought it was normal and I hated myself for feeling bad about it. Those were hard times.
A couple years ago I went on a sexualities research binge and went down an ADHD rabbit hole trying to learn everything I could because I was so tired of feeling that way, and that's when I found out.
Learning about asexuality felt like magic, it felt like freedom. It felt like crying after years of putting up with it all. It felt like relief. It all made sense and the world opened up to me, and I felt like I was meeting myself for the first time. It was beautiful.
Of course, then came the moments of panic because, how was I going to tell my mom that I am asexual? Or, am I even asexual or do I just want attention? And then the famous "so how do I know I love someone romantically if I don't really want anything physical with them?"
Where am I going with all this? Well, I'm obsessed with the way the series and Oliver have portrayed the realization. The idea that discovering something completely new, and it's actually not as new as you thought, brings more than just fear. Bring freedom. Bring understanding. Brings an "Oh" moment that feels down to your bones and penetrates your soul, and you can never come back from that moment because everything feels like you finally woke up and the whole world opened its arms to you.
And it's something sweet. It is something very delicate, soft, hopeful and so, so precious. And Buck, Evan, is experiencing it all for the first time with a man who is soft to him, sweet, considerate. He is learning about himself from someone kind, so he has the opportunity to have his "Oh" moment and feel freedom, because that freedom is being given to him by someone who knows what it's like to feel imprisoned. So nothing is rushed. So everything is calm and full of understanding. So Evan can feel emotions. And feel good throughout the entire process.
So yes, I am obsessed with them both and I love them and I want them so much that they last a long time and that Tommy stays.
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ctallena · 3 days
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hii!! don't be shy posting anythin, that's cool when new people appear who write south park stuff! 🤍 can i request (f!reader) picnic headcannons with kenny, stanley and kyle? it can be platonic or romantic(sure, aged up), idc
sure!! thank u sm for being my first headcannons req anon !! 🤍 ill try my best with these bc i never was on a picnic so i have to use my imagination on how it works.. also i made this romantic, theyre like 17-18 here
⋆ PICNIC WITH MAIN 3 :
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✩ — STAN !
this guy was so flattered when u asked him to go do a picnic with u
he was so excited he couldnt sleep
brought cookies and dr pepper...
its because he was walking around the store for like 30 minutes in denial of what would you like to eat 😭😭
like.. will u like it? what if youre picky? mostly everyone likes cookies so cookies it is
butttttt he brought money to the picnic too in case you need something
he picks a nice outfit for himself!!
and by that i dont mean a suit or anything like that... its just a tee that you once said you liked and his fav baggy jeans
so nervous before meeting u for the picnic. mostly bc of the food. what if youre not happy with the food he brought☹️
he brought a picnic blanket too tho!!
he tries to settle it himself but its sort of windy and he drops the blanket...
it flies away
but dw luckily he got it!!
he tries to settle it ahain but DONT trust him with that bc its gonna fly away again so help him pls😭
once its all settled he tries to make it romantic somehow?? he doesnt know how to be romantic without it being corny tho😕
so he just passes u everything u ask for!!
totally did not put the picnic basket next to himself on purpose..
with stan its mostly just giggles and stuff. he will hold your hand or hug you there and there but he enjoys just talking with you like he would with a best friend, if you know what i mean??
he kisses your cheek and thanks you for all the effort you put in everything <3
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✩ — KYLE !
he suggests the picnic 🤗
kyle is the most organized one of them all
before the picnic he knows what to bring and what food you like
like what??? how did he know that?? did he put cameras around ur house or smth
or maybe ur parents just like him a lot so they told him stuff..
keeps checking if he has everything
he also brings you a flower!!
hes a gentleman😭
somehow manages to settle the blanket himself??
he also picked the perfect time of the day so it would be sunset
puts sm effort in to show you how much he loves you!! hes so sweet
brought like a backup hoodie for you just in case youre cold😕
he doesn't really like touching you in public, so expect a hug and a kiss from him only after it gets darker after the sunset
or if he thinks no one is watching
ike definitely wanted to go with you two
kyle said no
he wants it to be a moment just for you and him
ike still comes along with sheila "on accident" but for like a few minutes bc kyle begged them to leave you two alone😭
HE WAS SO EMBARRASSED THAT HIS MOM CAME TOO💔
he apologizes to you
its not like hes embarrassed bc of sheila, its just the fact that his MOM came, if u get what i mean
what more can i say?
besides that its all perfect !!
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✩ — KENNY !
you suggest the picnic
he thought abt it before and wanted to ask you too but money... 😕
he immediately said yes and saved money just for that occasion
he knows what food u like
its because usually when you two hang out he randomly asks you stuff like "whats your fav food?" in that case
and he remembers every answer u give him🤗🤗
he brought food and you brought the blanket
he actually made sure to bring enough for the two of you
thats so sweet😕
he doesnt gaf abt public, he will show his love to you everywhere
so he has his arm wrapped around you most of the time
and also kisses your shoulder or cheek sometimes !!
he would do the rizz thing with "hey you have something there" while pointing at ur chest and then he would grab ur chin so u look at him and he kisses u
its just a joke tho😭
thats not a great way to flirt in his opinion
he would also chuckle before kissing u !!
sweeeeeeeet
after the picnic he offers to walk you to your home <3
he also holds your hand while walking
when youre about to leave he hugs you and thanks you for everything too🤗
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fill my requests up guys!!
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svtoose · 3 hours
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Benefits and More ft. Choi Seungcheol
pairing: seungcheol x gn!reader
word count: 600
A + F : angsty with some fluff at the end
warnings: friends w benefits, college au, some cursing, miscommunications
a/n : as coups' real wife, my first story had to be my husband obvi
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ··
You've spent countless nights with him, but it ends there. No sweet morning cuddles, no day-time dates, just nights.
It started last year as something playful, something meant to take your mind off of things, but slowly it became the opposite.
You and Seungcheol had been close friends and classmates for a long time when the attraction became overbearing. You guys mutually decided to become friends with benefits, considering that neither of you had time for a relationship because of college. School was demanding and it would be hard to care for someone else.
Once a week, sometimes more, you'd meet each other at one of your dorms and hook up then part ways. It was only a rare occurrence that you would spend the night together.
Tonight was one of those nights. Seungcheol came over about an hour and a half ago since your roommate was out. He lays on his stomach, head facing away from me as he sleeps in nothing but boxers. You sit beside him, quite tense, propped up on a pillow and wearing an old and ragged t-shirt. Your eyes drift toward him as you reconsider the agreement for the tenth time this week. You feel the adoration swim through my stomach as he snuggles into your pillow, his fluffy hair making a mess of itself. You know you shouldn't feel this way. Love was never part of the picture.
Cheol doesn't know it yet, but you've caught feelings. How could you not fall in love with him? He's so sweet and kind, he cares so much for other people. The scenario you guys are in makes him seem like a total f*ck boy but that couldn't be farther from the truth. He's actually such a kind person.
But It doesn't help that he decided to sleep over. No touching, no speaking, nothing after the deed is done. It upsets you every time even though you know this is what you signed up for.
"Are you gonna sleep?" The boy next to you asks in a raspy voice. He's still in the same position he was in before, eyes closed, facing the wall.
"I thought you were sleeping." You say softly. This is when he sits up. He lays his back against the headboard and continues to speak.
"I know there's something bothering you." He tells you, reading into your soul like he always does.
You shrug your shoulders, not wanting to admit to anything right now.
"What's bugging you, y/n ? You don't have to be afraid to tell me. Just because we get together doesn't mean you can't talk to me." He continued.
You know in a few minutes he'll regret saying that.
"I don't know, I just... What are we doing? How'd we ever think this was a good idea. I've never felt such, such yearning." Your sentence drags out as you contemplate kicking Seungcheol out before he gets a chance to respond. Did you really just admit your feelings?.
He leaves you speechless when he suddenly grabs your hand, keeping it warm in his. He's now intensely looking at your intertwined fingers as he continues to speak. Your heart is beating so quickly as you wait for his response. The seconds start feeling like hours.
"I wish you would've let me." He whispers it so quietly that you almost don't catch it.
He's doing that thing again when he talks so cryptically.
"Let you what?"
"Its my fault, though." He goes to say.
"What are you talking about?"  You ask
"From the start ... I wanted more from us. You were just so intent on it being this way, friends with benefits and nothing else, so I took what I could get. All I wanted was to be with you so I agreed." He tells you.
'Is this true? Is it my fault that things are this way?' You think to yourself
"Well, I thought you wanted the same thing. I only realized now that it wouldn't be enough." You whisper.
He next does something that surprises me. He flips over, hovering over you with is arms and knees on either of your sides. His weight is barely pressing against you as his hands delicately cup your cheeks.
"Does that mean what I think it means?" He asks, looking ethereally excited
"Do you think it means I'm in love with you?" You reply, a sudden confidence boost blooming from his actions.
Without even answering, he smiles and brings his lips to yours.
You've done this hundreds of times but this kiss is different. The warmth that engulfs us is entirely new.
It's love, it's passion. It's finally complete.
You pull away, smiling at each other.
"No more of just this, baby." He says
"How 'bout a date instead?" You ask, smiling fondly at your new lover.
"You got it." He laughs
You smile sincerely at him as you lay back in bed together. His arms around wrapped around you give you a squeeze as he gives his final kiss of the night, and endearing peck on the forehead.
"Sleep tight, sweetheart." You hear Seungcheol say before you're off to sleep.
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foxgloveprincess · 1 day
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Pairing: Cole Turner x Female Reader, Curtis Everett x Female Reader [Second Person Narrator]
Summary: You always try to be your best at your job.
Word Count: 919
Attic Wives Anonymous Masterlist
Warnings: Dark, Dubious Consent (Sex Toys, mild Overstimulation), Manhandling, Clueless Reader, Cages, Pet Names (pup, lamb, etc.). Minors do not interact (18+).
A/N: Time to meet the contractor/handyman and his business partner, the toy maker. It’s a side story for A.W.A. that I just wanted to peek into. Don’t know if there’ll be any more parts to this. But Enjoy!
I love feedback, so go ahead and reblog if you want. However, I give no permission to copy, translate, rewrite or post my work on any third party website or app. Seeing my work posted anywhere beside my blog, my library blog, or my AO3 account (FoxglovePrincess) means it’s been stolen/plagiarized.
I don’t do tag lists, so follow @foxglovefics to sign up for notifications on my fics. 
This is unBeta’d, so all mistakes are my own.
Please DO NOT click ‘Keep Reading’ if you are not 18+ years of age or if you are uncomfortable with the pairing, themes, dynamics, or warnings. You are responsible for your own media consumption. Thank you!
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Things you now knew were stupid: answering a sketchy ad on the side of the road for a job in product testing. Apparently not your brightest idea. As Jeanne would say, you’re a dumb bitch. At least you were cute. 
It hadn’t seemed that bad. Cole and Curtis were pleasant, though they made you well aware of your deficient resume. You didn’t have marketable skills. It was something people said a lot. 
But that didn’t stop them from hiring you. They wanted you to start right away. And the benefits? They said they’d be comprehensive. 
What they didn’t mention was what exactly that meant. You were just happy they’d chosen you. With job after job firing you for ‘incompetence’, they’d seen your potential. Had said so, in exactly those words. You’d been on cloud nine, smiling wide. 
Before they opened the door to your office and had you test the first product. 
“Just turn your head toward the camera,” Cole coaxes, his sweet words dripping over you like honey. 
Your feverish body slumps over. The machine between your legs continuing its torturous thrusts and vibrations. 
A warm hand falls to your lower back, the other tilting your head up to meet stormy blue eyes. 
“She’s had enough,” Curtis says. With a flick of a switch, the machine beneath you turns off. 
“Come on, man,” Cole whines, “just a little longer. She’s so fucking adorable when she breaks like this.”
“We don’t want to break her.” 
Bundled into strong arms, you’re pulled off the toy and laid out on a nearby cushion. Your limbs melt into the plush fabric, twitching from overstimulation. Not an ounce of strength to move of your own volition. That’s all been fucked out of you. 
“It’s half the fun,” Cole mutters under his breath, starting a routine of cleaning off the toy. Though he complains, he won’t go against his partner outright. They work too well together for that. 
A quiet moment passes, Cole cleaning up and Curtis rummaging through some drawers. He produces a blanket a few moments later and carefully wraps you in it. You hum and lean close to his gentle touch. 
“By the way, Ari’s got me making a tail for his girl,” Cole says, joining Curtis in putting you away. He tilts your chin up with a finger. “How do you feel about that?”
You blink slowly and let incomprehensible mumbles fall past your lips. Mostly in the affirmative, not quite understanding how they’ll make you a tail. Isn’t that something animals are born with? Or sometimes like your cousin Courtney? Your brow furrows as you try to think.
You shiver and grip at the quilt over your shoulders, tucking it closer to your face.  For one night you wish they’d let you sleep here. Not that you’d complain about your normal accommodations. They could always fire you, and then where would you be?
“Don’t go falling asleep on us now or you’ll forget your form,” Cole reminds. He tucks a pen and paper into your unsteady grip and presses a kiss to your forehead. 
You blink to clear your eyes and look at the short form. Five questions and a comment box. 
“Do you need help?” Curtis asks, a hand on the cushion by your head, close enough to touch. 
Despite the urge to stretch into his touch and accept his generosity, you shake your head. It’s your job, you’ll do it yourself. Dragging your body from the cushion, you sit up and place the paper on your leg. Scrawl the product description on the top line. All five questions stare up at you, a scale of 1 to 5 beneath. 
Is the product enticing to potential customers? 
Is the product innovative?
Does the product seem high quality?
Is the product different from other products?
Does the product fulfill our customer’s needs and wants?
Though sluggish, your brain processes each question and makes a thoughtful rating for Cole’s new machine. The comment box proves more difficult. Words harder to scrawl while your hand lacks its usual strength and dexterity. But you jot down a few notes—about the vibration and the fit, you think? 
A yawn cracks your jaw and you stand on wobbly legs. Holding onto different bits of furniture about the room, you hobble to place the paper in its usual basket. They’ll look at it at the end of the month and determine what to do with it. 
Legs like jelly, you steady yourself a moment too long. Your bosses preparing your next task. You glance over and sigh. Still trying to perfect that thing. They’ve been working on it since you started working for them. 
“Come on, pup,” Curtis beckons, voice gruff, holding the door open. “Time for some shuteye.” 
You nod and bend your knees, ducking into the small metal cage. They finally got the cushion on the bottom thick enough that you don’t feel the bars digging into your side as you lay down. And they added some personal touches—a few pillows, your favorite blankets, a stuffed animal—to ensure the space still allows comfort to fit a full-grown human. 
Another yawn breaks free of your lips. Your head falls to the pillow and you let your eyes flutter shut. 
Fingers caress your cheek through the bars. You peek open your eyes to see Cole, a soft look of satisfaction on his face. 
“Time for a little nap, little lamb,” he whispers, “then there’s a few more things we need to test.”
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oceanwithouthermoon · 3 months
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i always feel bad when i see how the point of a lot of saiki's personality traits flew right over the heads of a lot of fans due to him being an unreliable narrator and a tsundere lol.. so a lot of things he says are immediately proved to be untrue and often just him putting up a front, but some people dont pick up on it..
like i see a lot of "haha saiki would never want to watch a romance movie" guys there is an entire chapter (170) dedicated to him being like "i much prefer mysteries to romance stories.." and then immediately becoming absolutely enamored with a romance story.. he was lying, guys, LMAO
less specific ones include:
"i hate children, they annoy me" *goes out of his way to help kids, comfort them, be kind to them, etc.*
"i only use my powers for self gain/my own convenience." "anyway my mama told me to never use my powers selfishly so i always use them to help people and i try my best not to use them for personal gain<3"
"those guys are so annoying, i would never hang out with them willingly." "yeah it took them about two sentences to convince me to go with them. their thoughts seemed like they really wanted me to go, so i did. i didnt want them to be upset. not that i care about them or anything."
(sorry i post about this kind of thing a lot, i just giggle a lot at how the entire manga is so easily misinterpreted and thousands of people have watched the show but didnt pick up on the main characters most defining character traits and frequent bits.. i think there needs to be a masterlist or something disproving all the extremely common misconceptions about saiki k lol)
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craycraybluejay · 28 days
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yes i am an adult male who loves high school dramas this is because i literally never experienced normal coming of age drama like ever and am disconnected from the collective experience of having a relatable peer group forever hope that helps
#i JUST want to experience high school#without like. my whole shitty life thing having gone on#i want to go to high school and have stupid drama and sexuality crises and worries about grades#not... That#i never had that im never going to have that#can i get (one) permission to go a little crazy if i survive into a university#fuck everyone befriend and be-enemy everyone get all up in peoples stupid mind numbingly low stakes drama#i want that sweet golden experience where the worst thing ill ever fear is annoying my classmates#or accidentally spilling something on someone at a dance#i deserve it i deserve to have had a childhood and a young adulthood and a life#i deserve to have dealt with unserious issues to prepare me for bigger ones#rather than serious danger that leaves me permanently severed from normal people and life#and makes me incapable of reacting proportionally or finding it in me to care about less serious problems#like yes it sucks your mom is going to miss college graduation#but i thank my lucky stars that you are not dying or being abused or starved or beaten or exploited#i literally dont know how to take things seriously a lot of the time like im not able to even if i try#because to me the mildest real problem is someone purposefully isolating you and ruining your health#the MILDEST#i try to care ab simple stuff i really do i just CANT#and it sucks so much trying to be a good friend and kind feeling like i cant do enough#the loud thought 'i wish that hapoened to me/i wish i worried about that/i wish the people i love only had that as a problem'#i get so envious. like thank fucking god your parents divorced like normal adults when it should be over#thank fucking god that 'friend' cut you off when they were actively insulting you and betraying your trust#thank the fucking universe that shitty partner dumped you before you fkn hurt yourself over them#yk?#and its a 'mean/cold' way to think about it but i just dont have the capacity to think or feel the little picture#i can imagine my friends subjected to such horror even tho i dont want to
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bandtrees · 4 months
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two conversations i want to have about "dead dove do not eat"
it's annoying how people treat it as a genre or descriptor in and of itself when it hypothetically should have no ties to "problematic" or "dark", it literally just means "what you see is what you get with these tags" - which is a concept that can encompass any kind of writing. in an ideal world dead dove is not a Type of fic, it is literally just a neutral descriptor, and i think it's very annoying how it got largely co-opted by proshippers who think it's shorthand for Dark And Twisted Porn™ and treat it as some kind of genre in and of itself
it just sounds incredibly lame. what's wrong with just saying "yeah heed the tags this is serious" instead of assuming everyone knows about a nonsense vaguely-artsy meme phrase. can we not just use our words
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cathalbravecog · 8 months
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i'm the antonymph of the internet
#how many tributes to this song will i make in my life#MANY ! it literally changed my life and means a lot to me. i love antonymph and vylet pony's music is worth checking out - please do.#unsupervised internet access as a queer neurodivergent kid anthem !!#i chose to do misty since we all know i like drawing her in experimental pieces and putting her in outfits. she also has art in a gir hoodi#from the clash team in treasure trove!! :D#this is also experimental/stylistic as well!! had fun!! nice to just draw something in one day and not worry. leaves me tired but...#haven't done a nice piece like so in one day in a while!!! i'm very proud :] it's a fun one#anyways... both a little tribute to the song and misty as a character#ihave so many thoughts about misty even if i dont talk publicly on them. shes a very interesting character to me and i care about her so#much. i compared her to fluttershy in the past - and realized that if i liked ttcc as a kid she would've been my favorite.#fluttershy on her own meant a lot to me as a child. including mlp itself as it's one of the core things that got me into drawing art online#a lot of my analysis on misty and headcanons at least on the more emotional scale do come from a bit of projecting but...it makes it more#fun to me when i can put myself into the shoes of a character like her who i already relate to. rrghh too bad im scared to talk about her#too much in nuanced detail in public since some people are... not so nice about her. though i know the tumblr audience is nice and unders#standing!!#anyways from me just having fun being me#i let misty have a little bit of fun... something i think she would possibly enjoy? i do see her as someone who gets nostalgic#and is stuck in more childish things and matters. she wants to play ip dip with you...its very sweet to me. letting myself and her be#confident through a song that means so much to me is kind of powerful to me. i had a lot of fun making this drawing.#anyways. love this song. love ttcc. love mity /p. be swag and be self indulgent and have fun. you can do anything u want forevah#toontown#toontown corporate clash#antonymph#guz art#rainmaker
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