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sparkles-rule-4eva · 2 days

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Alrighty! @number-one-shadisper-shipper and I binged the Knuckles series today, so time for thoughts! SPOILER ALERT.

I'll admit the show wasn't perfect. I've seen the negative reviews, and I kinda get where they come from. BUT! I did enjoy this show greatly! And I'm not here to complain. Time for some happy thoughts, y'all! 💙🤩

I think you need to have a love, not just tolerance, for the SCU in order to properly enjoy this show. I do have such, so I had a lot of fun with it.

There were definitely scenes from every episode that had me either squealing, laughing, crying, or flipping out. But my favorite was likely the first episode, because come on, we saw the Wachowski family! Most of them, anyway! While I missed Tom's presence, I was grateful for that comment from Maddie about him being "out of town," so he wasn't just gone for no reason.

The SECOND it showed our three space babies hanging out together in their room?! I SCREAMED. THE BOYS!!!!

Tails sitting on his bed tinkering with one of his gizmos, Sonic rocking out to music with an air guitar, and Knuckles exercising from one of the ceiling planks. IT'S THEM!!! They're just hanging out, doing their thing, looking oh so much like brothers. And Sonic's narration at the beginning was GOLD. 🤣💙

Even though we didn't get enough of Maddie being a parent, we definitely got a nice chunk for it only lasting part of an episode. Maddie called Knuckles "one of our kids" (that had me SCREECHING). The angry mama vibes were GOLDEN. 🤣 The way she made breakfast for them, the "Boys, breakfast is ready!" I love the normalcy of it! Can't wait to see more in the future! (Her calling to them with "boys" is somehow just the sweetest thing and I'm melting.)

The poor mailman being like "I just wanna go home, man" 🤣

We were right, fellas, Knuckles had no idea what being grounded meant. 🤣 Although the way Sonic piped up with "Oh, I definitely know what it means," has me suspecting that Sonic himself has gotten grounded a decent amount before. 😂

Knuckles trying to talk back, and Maddie going, "ExCUSE ME?!" then just making those tiny, terrifying noises and Sonic being like "Bro don't mess with Mom when she's mad" (okay, he didn't say "mom" and that made me sad, but the mom vibes were 110% there so I'm here for it). 😂 And since Knuckles snuck out and later Wade said, several times, "Aren't you grounded?" seems to confirm that this entire show is basically what Knuckles does when he's grounded. 🤣 Although ... his comment about not being able to be grounded because he had no home made me very sad. 😭

I did not have an issue with so much Wade screentime! Sure, he isn't my favorite SCU character, but I love what this show did with him! I'd already seen his moments in the movies (like nearly shooting Robotnik in the face with an actual handgun). I like how they gave him actual family issues; a dad who abandoned him and his family, a realistic sister, a mom. Bad family memories. Awkward reunions. They could've made it a joke, but they didn't, and I greatly appreciate that. Especially since I've witnessed firsthand how painful family separations can be. 😔

All the emotional talks Wade and Knuckles had caught me off guard in the best way! The way they talked about their different family issues, the way they talked of betrayal from friends, and being left alone, hit way harder than I was prepared for. Especially that talk they had at the burger place in the middle of the night? Oof. Good talk right there.

Also, even though they took a "show don't tell" take with it, I loved how Knuckles relaxed more and more throughout the show. In the beginning, he couldn't rest, he couldn't sit back and have a genuine good time. But the more he hung out with Wade and his family, the more he learned. He learned about music and found "his jam" (that was literally amazing btw). He watched movies with Mrs. Whipple and ate snacks in the hotel room in Reno and watched more movies. He had his teenager moments of rolling his eyes and rebelling, but he was so well portrayed here, I loved it. I felt for him.

Despite the bizarre nature of the episode "Flames of Disaster," (we were cracking up so hard) I'm trying to glean bits of the truth of Knuckles's story from the crazy musical play that Pachacamac put on in Wade's dream. I mean, "Longclaw" and her tribe were there, and ... what the heck was that giant demon thing?! Iblis?! Does our Knuckles Wachowski have an actual history with freaking Iblis?!?! 😱🔥

I was deeply intrigued by the two main antagonists, especially at the implication that G.U.N. did seem to exist before the events of the first movie?! Did it exist, get disbanded after the Maria incident, then get reformed?! My brain is exploding. 🤯 I was even more shocked that they apparently died? I guess I shouldn't be surprised, the Wachowski kids don't seem to have much qualms about getting rid of the baddies for good as the game versions do. That was a terrifying phenomenon, what happened with the two rings. 🫣

And then the Buyer getting crushed by the giant glass ball 👀

Although in those last two episodes, I admit I was freaking out and legitimately near tears at Wade's seemingly having to "betray" Knuckles. Before the reveal that all was in good communication, all I could think was how relaxed Knuckles finally seemed, chilling in the hotel room, being excited about whatever Wade wanted to "show" him, questioning whether it was a song, him declaring that he was going to bring his favorite hat, 🥹 all I could think was of their previous discussions about betrayal from friends and family, and when Knuckles called Wade "my friend" right before the elevator doors closed, I just about sobbed. I was like "please, don't let him be betrayed, don't let him have come all this way and relaxed so much only to get 'betrayed' once again by someone he's come to consider a friend." 😭 We heaved a HUGE sigh of relief when it revealed he was aware of the trap the whole time. 😪

Maternal instincts went nuts when he got so badly hurt in that final battle 😭 I literally reached for the screen several times and was right back to almost weeping 🥲 And someone tell me I wasn't the only one noticing the parallel in that scene with Wade standing in front of his unconscious body the way Tom did with Sonic in the first movie. That, PLUS Knuckles's epic comeback, and his retrieval of his own power?!?! EPIC!!!!

The ending was abrupt, sure, but the pure joy on Knuckles's face after everything as he jumped up to high five Wade was just too sweet. 🥹

So yes, even though I would have loved just a little more, a return to Green Hills, a reunion with Maddie, Sonic, and Tails, I adored this show. It was a wild ride, full of laughs, tears, excited screeching, etc. 💙💛❤️ I don't care what anyone says, nothing will make me hate it.

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marikosenwrites · 2 days

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karasuno boys - dating headcanons (pt. 1)!

a/n: sen here!! heyy obsessing over our haikyuu boys are we <3 yes i am i'm only on season two right now though, almost season three!! i'll be doing aoba jousai, nekoma, and fukuroudani gakuen! enjoy!

characters: hinata shouyou, kageyama tobio, tanaka ryuunosuke, sawamura daichi, sugawara koushi (suga-san🥹), tsukishima kei (TSUKKI🥹) [pt. 1], yamaguchi tadashi, takeda ittetsu (just me and one of my favorites), ukai keishin [and in that order] {pt.2}

pt. 1 || pt. 2

notes: in this au, kiyoko can't be married to tanaka...yeah. they're still in highschool, btw

gn!reader

↳ ❝ [ 日向翔陽 HINATA SHOUYOU ] ¡! ❞

-this cutie omg

-probably the first to confess

-gets all blushy when you're around at the start of the relationship

-you love ruffling his hair

-if you watch him practice until the end, he treats you to meat buns!! if he doesn't have enough money, he'll just share one with you

-kageyama is jealous omg and tsukishima is just like "the chibi got a girlfriend??"

-loves you so very much

-his love language HAS to be words of affirmation and physical affection

-you just can't help but return the affection

-if you don't know how to play volleyball, he's gonna teach you!!

-if you know- he's going to ask you to talk to him

-dates will be chaotic and affectionate

-often cooking dates!

-you love his family especially natsu

-also love them amusement park dates with him

-he's so fun loving and all

-kisses are very innocent, close to no spice at all except when he's feeling super annoyed or something

-loves cuddling with you when it's bedtime <33

-does NOT have a specific schedule rest assured

-calls you his dove (aww)

-you love calling him sunshine <333

-HE'S JUST SO BRIGHT

-I SWEAR

↳ ❝ [ 影山飛雄 KAGEYAMA TOBIO ] ¡! ❞

-a sweetheart actually

-he's so cold on the outside but lights up when you're there

-kisses have a little bit of spice

-he's too prideful to confess first ig so you make the move

-loves it when you come to his practice to support him

-at some point he has requested you to become a manager because sometimes ukai thinks you're a distraction for him so asks you to walk out for a bit to let kageyama concentrate

-you bet he has worried over it because he didn't know where you went

-ok onto the main shit

-dates are always somehow sport related (HOW DOES HE KEEP FINDING THEM)

-sometimes an outing or two when he's actually free and not busy with volleyball stuff

-you'd think he isn't clingy...WELL IT'S THE OPPOSITE ALRIGHT.

-he actually craves YOUR attention and YOURS ONLY

-i think you two would have a cat together (named it NOTHING after the other volleyball players you know :/)

-loves your cuddles too

-WAIT WAIT HEAR ME OUT

-YOU KNOW HE BUYS THEM DRINKS RIGHT

-HE WOULD BUY LIKE HUNDREDS FOR YOU IF YOU WANT

-aww the little (wait he's tall) guy

↳ ❝ [ 田中龍之介 TANAKA RYUUNOSUKE ] ¡! ❞

-the hot-headed guy just can't get enough of you

-you sometimes make fun of him for being almost bald-

-but he's okay with it because he loves you (as long as you dont do it that often)

-okay so firstly like kiyoko WHEN HE SEES YOU HE CONFESSES TO YOU ALMOST IMMEDIATELY

-one second he's dumbfounded by your beauty, the other he's confessing to you already

-like you reject him first few times

-AND THEN AND THEN YOU START TO FALL FOR HIM

-THEREFORE YOU ACCEPT WOOOOO

-it's uh "Y/N-SAN! I LIKE YOU CAN YOU GO OUT WITH ME?!!!" and then you're just like "ah- yeah. mhm."

-he's just like :o WHAT

-okay that's it for the confession

-dates are always what you want

-if it happens you want to make cake, go for an ice cream shop, an amusement park- whatever, you name it and he can afford it? YOU'RE GOING

-they're all so sweet...

-he's also needy at some point when you're dating

-so...MORE IN MY NSFW LATER

↳ ❝ [ 菅原孝史　SUGAWARA KOUSHI ] ¡! ❞

-i'm gonna bet 100 dollars that he's the one confessing

-STEP ONE: get you as his girlfriend

-firstly he's going to ask you to meet him during lunch in the morning

-second when you're both there he confesses

-to his surprise you accept to go out with him and one date turns into two, into three and ON

-STEP TWO: MORE DATES TO COMEEE

-always ice cream dates and baking dates

-always appears to get flour in his fluffy hair

-ALSO ALSO YOU LOVE PATTING HIS HAIR AT ALL TIMES IT'S LIKE COMFORTING YOURSELF

-sometimes picnics too <333

-STEP THREE: there is none for now but THERE WILL BE SOON. SOON ENOUGH.

-his way of giving you affection is by kissing you, cuddling, and giving you praises...

-do you have a praise kink (nvm forget i asked that)

-cuddling in bed is one of his favorite ways to go to sleep

-you stroking his back is too

-you guys are always the talk of the karasuno vb boys group when you guys get together for gatherings (the perfect couple?!?!?!?!)

↳ ❝ [ 澤村大地 SAWAMURA DAICHI ] ¡! ❞

-he's definitely the one to confess first being the big boy man he is <3

-literally will kiss you when you accept

-so taken aback you felt like you were going to faint

-his kisses are so gentle help

-ok maybe not sometimes but we all know when that is

-love playing with his ears mayybe?? i know there's nothing different with the rest, but i just feel like it's with daichi

-your first date is an amusement park one ✨✨

-p.s. you shared the cotton candy lmao-

-he literally walked you home and your parents invited him in for dinner

-they like him very much thank you

-relationship has been approved now your parents are urging him to marry you even though it's only one week into the relationship-

-now HE'S the one that pats your head every time he passes you in the hallway or whatsoever

-when you move in together LITERALLY EVERYTHING IS YOUR CHOICE NOW

-you can choose the flat, the decorations, the vibes, the furniture- EVERYTHING

-loves you that much yes

-the sweetest guy ever NO DEBATE

↳ ❝ [ 月島蛍 TSUKISHIMA KEI ] ¡! ❞

-SALTY SHIMA. THIS MAN IS SO SALTY

-i swear bro

-he has rizz though that's for sure

-he confesses to you first (it was during lunch you remember the day like it was yesterday)

-his kisses are half spicy (igg since tsukishima is that kinda person)

-the mean to the public and only kind to you kind of person <3

-dates are usually home dates (he's an introvert (i headcanon))

-perhaps if you can persuade him (it's a 50/50)

-first date was a movie date

-then you went home with him (you went to his house)

-and met his parents

-they liked you very much <33 now treat you like their daughter

-the next time you went on a date, you brought him to yours and he made a good impression but they don't love him as much as his parents do to you

-i will write the time skip arc for this because i am biased and you literally can't stop me (but tell me if you want more i'll reblog it with more hcs)

-you were so happy for him when he joined the sendai frogs

-cheered for him on every game (LIKE THE SHIRT AND THE SIGNS AND STUFF)

-facepalmed himself out of spite ya bet he got a scolding for that

-"KEI KEI KEI GANABTTE," that was you, screaming at the top of your lungs at your HUSBAND.

-"oi, tsukki, who's that?"

-tsukishima facepalmed himself, earning a glare from you, "my wife."

-"EHH?? TSUKKI HAS A WIFE??"

-lmao the most normal occurrence

-after that koganegawa would often come to you and ask for dirt on kei (screw him for facepalming)

-saltyshima (in the public) → sweetieshima (in front of you only)

©marikosenwrites 2024-25 all banners, dividers, and work. please do not steal. i own none of the HAIKYUU!!/ハイキュー！！ characters mentioned. reblogs, likes, and comments are welcomed. <3

#sen's works #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu fluff #hinata shoyo #kageyama tobio #sugawara koushi #sugawara daichi #tsukishima kei #hinata x reader #kageyama x reader #sugawara x reader #sawamura x reader #tsukishima x reader #marikosenwrites

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richeeduvie · 3 days

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pathetic little woo woo man Roman bullying his poor secretary into running messages and reading them aloud to baby throughout the workday like “I want to lick your palms” and “bark I love you ew”

"Oh, Jami-"

"I am so sorry. For what I'm about to do, this is something that I was order to commit to - in my professional opinion, it is highly unprofessional...but Mr. Roy's reason for doing this is because you aren't answering your messages. And I can just say I've done it, he'll ask you about it but you'll just-"

Kendall's eyes shift from left to right. His arms are down straight, fists closed - confusion on the curve of his brows and lips.

You close your eyes.

"I will take it how Roman wanted it delivered."

"...What is this?"

"Sorry, Mr. Roy. Maybe we I should do this-" Jamie pulls out their phone with a tight swallow. "We can do this somewhere more private."

"No. You're gonna do it here because what the fuck?"

"Kendall. It's alright."

Maybe Roman will find unarousing embarrassment at the idea of his big brother listening to the messages he wrote in smug confidence.

"Unless, maybe you shouldn't - it's Roman."

But you know you'll burn if Kendall listens. You'll get small, for some reason. Either way, you lose.

And Kendall doesn't budge. Jamie clears their throat.

"Alright...um - I guess I'll just relay them."

There's a scratch to the throat before it begins. You'll have to find this hot later on.

"Bawd bitch. Bawd business woma-this is multiple messages, not just one run-on statement. Sorry."

Jamie clears their throat again.

"Bawd bitch. Bawd business woman bitch. You're not important, you can be doing anything that makes you ignore me. But business, maybe. Answer the phone so I don't have to do this."

You see Jamie's hands clench. You do burn with Kendall in the room, but you think this gets at him more, this is the Roman you know - whether there's someone in the room or not.

You try not to smile because Kendall isn't.

"I could also just...dot, dot, dot. There's dots, sorry. I could also just come to you, but I'm fun. You bawdish baby. I love you, and I want responses when I tell you I want to lick your palms. I want to, by the way."

Jamie's voice trails off. You feel bad because you think they're more embarrassed than you.

"Then there's a dog emoji and drooling emoji. It ends with another I love you and him calling himself fun."

Kendall crosses his arms.

"That's unacceptable. That's...he can't fuck-fucking...Roman just can't fucking do that."

"Ken, it's okay-"

"No. It's not just about you, even though it is-it's wrong. Jamie, you can report this, this is harassment on your end."

"Mr. Roy-"

"No, this is not okay. It's not even a joke, if it was teasing, it'd be fine. It'd be a waste of time, but fine. This is...not it."

Kendall sputters, anger toned. You have to sigh, not because of that, but because you know Roman's smiling and twiddling his thumbs with every pathetic, perfect muscle a floor below.

#inbox #hc's #drabble #dog and bone!au #roman roy x reader

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strangegutz · 2 days

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Apologies if you've answered an ask like this before, but I've noticed that your drawing style and your dollmaking are very different, with your dolls being more stylized. Would you say that developing an art style for your dolls was easier/harder/different than finding a drawing style, and is there a reason you gravitate towards a 3D art style so different from your 2D one? I ask because I've always drawn in a semi-realistic style but want to make dolls, and I was wondering what it's like to make the jump. Personally, I feel like I struggle to unlearn/make myself get over the rules of proportions and anatomy in order to make more stylized stuff. Sorry for rambling a bit!

I'm wracking my brain trying to figure out a good way to answer the first part of your question, about developing the separate art styles- I might get back to you on that if I can think of anything later (particularly difficult bc theyre both styles ive had for a Long Time that have just evolved over time so it's hard to pinpoint feelings on the development)

As for why they're so different, it's mostly because most dolls you see are pretty realistic, to a degree. I think it's more fun, visually striking, and just all around easier on my brain to make them styled out of a bunch of cobbled together shapes- it tickles something in my brain, and it feels like I'm making something fresh. That being said, it's also my skill level, I couldn't make a 3D version of my usual 2D art style if I tried- drawing noses at all angles is hard enough, sculpting them? I'd explode.

Also with them having bendy wire for bodies, it feels more fitting to be extra stylized, rather than something realistic with rubberhose arms

I'll also add that I can/have drawn 2D work in my 3D style, but haven't in a while- it's easier to jump around to different styles on paper than it is with full on sculptures, haha

I do want to make dolls of a couple of my cowboy characters, it'll be interesting to compare the two styles side by side!

#i hope this is anything!#asks #strangetext #faq

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malk1ns · 2 years

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so yesterday @ticklefighthockey was using this prompt generator and doing mini outlines—it looked fun, so i'm copying! some of these are not screenshots because i was hitting the 'generate' button too fast but ended up wanting to keep them. beware for grimy, yucky plotpoints, including problems with consent!

this is a world in which there's something sacred in an alpha/omega bond; maybe something required by the league, maybe a stipulation from either sid or geno's parents to let them play? whatever it is, bonds in this world are only consummated/created via sex—that's the only way. and over time the consummation sex has become highly, highly ritualized, even for couples that are freely seeking to bond out of love. for sid and geno? the rigidity of the tradition is what gets them through their first time. part of the ritual involves a 'claiming' of the omega by the alpha—this is a world where gender roles are strictly enforced in the traditional rituals—the omega is asleep and overtaken by the alpha, and that's how it begins.

sid and geno are in this world's version of a queer relationship. there's homophobia here for sure, but it's milder, a lot better than it used to be at least, that's for sure. they've been taking it slow—the dynamics clash is no joke, and they're working through being there for each other through the pheromone surges and how to handle each other's ruts as their cycles sync up. so they've had sex—a lot of it—but they've never knotted inside the other one.

the first time they try it, once the knot is locked in, the one who's being knotted has some horrible flashback memory to a hazing incident when he was in juniors. the rookies had all been fed shots until their vision was blurry, and whoever tapped out of taking more first was held down and teased with a knotting toy, one of those heat aids that omegas buy if they don't feel like getting an alpha. they never actually locked the knot in, the other boys, but it got very, very close.

he'd forgotten, until now, that had happened to him. and now he's stuck until the other's knot goes down.

repressed religious society and knotting with crying during sex

this one is pretty simple. in a society where virginity is prized above an other value or trait, and sex ed is essentially nonexistent.

sid and geno get married. they're young—scandalously young by our standards, and even in this world they raise a few eyebrows. but they're desperately in love, and they don't want to wait, and so they get their blessings and are united.

the wedding night comes, and they're both so fumbling and eager. geno's nervous, and so so careful with sid, but neither of them know what they're doing, and it's confusing and scary and it hurts and geno doesn't know how to make it better, and it's overwhelming for them both, and they end up crying in each other's arms as they wait for geno's knot to go down. after all, when your first time is put on such a pedestal, the only real outcome can be disappointment.

alpha/alpha and free use with internalized shame

for this one i'd revisit my free use 'verse i did for a/b/o fest this year. two alphas (to be named later, i don't remember anyone's designations lol) are in a clandestine relationship. to the world they're just buddies, good friends, but in private one of them acts like an omega, and in this world that means he's 'available' at all times. this would be a deep dive into his internal monologue as he orders sex aids from the sketchy side of the internet, as he slips out of bed on the mornings of days off to prepare himself to act and feel like an omega. he loves it—they both love it—but there's some deep, deep shame and self-loathing that goes along with all of this.

rutsex and used as a reward with (optional) branding/marking

alphas are rare rare rare, and there are...stereotypes about them. some of them have a ring of truth, some of them don't. one of the most pervasive, though, is that if you're an omega going through heat, the best partner for you is an alpha who's in rut. they'll do everything they can to please you and make sure you're spent and satisfied by the end, and if it goes well they'll be utterly devoted to you from then on.

alphas aren't allowed to play in the NHL until they're 22, which is when they supposedly settle and are less 'feral'. so, geno may have made his way to the US (in this world he stays after the draft, alphas are valuable enough that no team would risk sending him away on the off chance someone steals them), and he might be the penguins' property, but he's not allowed to play. he can attend practice, and he's collecting a paycheck, but he's not on the roster. not yet.

sid, though, is allowed to play. he's an omega, after all.

the franchise is clearly banking on him and geno as The Future, so they pair them up during practice, and sid does his best to try and soothe geno's jealousy and discontent. they become friends, good friends even.

something else that the organization is banking on, something they don't share with sid or geno, is that if sid and geno spend enough time together, their cycles will sync up, sid will go into heat when geno's in rut, and they'll tie their superstars to each other and to the franchise.

and, well. sid's the Next One. doesn't he deserve to have a reward? a little treat on the side for when the spotlight gets too bright? he is the youngest player to hit 100 points, after all...

#my fic #my writing #i think i'll do more of these later! this was fun #grimy fic generator

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marblerose-rue · 7 months

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click for better quality!

must be fall

#my art #eye contact #tw eye contact #scopophobia #scopohobia tw #furry #sfw furry #oc #let me know if i need to tw tag this more or give me the proper tags if im not using the right one!!!#i do not remember my oc tag bc when i went to look NOTHING would pop up . so maybe i'll edit this later and see #I HAVENT DONE ART FOR [ME] IN A REALLY LONG TIME which is why ive been working up to posting this AHBDFKU #BUT YEAH i am really happy with this. im having a fun time switching between the first sketch and the final product #im also eating a bag of blue raspberry sour patch kids like my life depends on it theyre so good #my hair is also getting pretty long i think and im debating on just letting it grow out or buzzing it again or a Short haircut #we'll see i'll probs figure out by the time october is over #ive been stalling the last 30 minutes to post this LMAO

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kenobihater · 2 months

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of all the star wars movies, which of them do y'all 1) enjoy the most 2) consider the best quality and 3) think you've rewatched the most. add your answers in the reblogs or replies, i'm genuinely curious how much of an overlap there is within everyone's three answers. mine don't overlap at all! they're revenge of the sith, empire strikes back, and the force awakens :^)

#len speaks #star wars #revenge of the sith #empire strikes back #the force awakens #not tagging more films than that bc i cant b bothered. incoming tag ramble ahead bc i have sw brainrot rn and im making it everyones prob❤️#i rlly struggled 2 remember if id watched tfa or aotc more. i went w/ tfa bc it was formative to me as a teen and ive seen it probably 6ish #times? whereas aotc was the first sw movie i remember (specifically the scene of obiwan serving c*nt in the bar lmao) but i've only seen it #for sure 4.5 and maybe 5.5 times. the .5 is from when i got bored after obi-wan's scene ended and ran off to go play in the mud or smthn 😭#i'm sure tfa will eventually get surpassed in number of rewatches by aotc and rots bc i don't fw the direction of the ST but that's my #current ballpark estimate of my total number of rewatches #as an adult tho if i just wanna watch a star war i'll go with aotc bc it's fun and ends semihappily and i can turn my brain off for the #spinny lightsabers. it's great background noise or for if you're sick or whatever. rots on the other hand? i won't talk through that unless #i'm quoting it with my brother and i am LOCKED IN 100% entirely entranced by it all #i almost picked rogue one for the best quality answer but i think the character writing is weaker and the facial cgi is creepy. esb beats #it by a hair imho bc of that. the vader hallway scene goes hard tho!!!#also i'm not covering shows or games or books or anything else in this post - simply the films. might ask abt shows later but that might #also give me hives bc so many of the shows suck ass and i don't rlly want ppl extolling the virtues of t.bb in my notes 💀#and yes i do think one's enjoyment and one's opinion of quality are two things that often overlap. but sometimes you just like something #bad and that's awesome. like rots is the best of the prequels by a large margin and i adore the opening and characters and many of the #scenes but that doesn't mean it's the best star wars has to offer ykwim? it's my specialest most favoritest sw movie but that doesn't blind #me to the dialogue lmfaooo

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inkskinned · 2 years

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i turn 29 on july 1st. i feel like i make a lot of these notes to myself, to check in. hi, me, here's what's happening.

hi, me. hi, you, too, if you keep reading. here's some rules i have been following:

when a book is bad, i put the book down. i choose something i like instead. when i don't like a movie, i don't make myself watch until the end. i care less and less what people think about me and focus more on being a good friend.

for the 6 months or so, i've been asking people what they think should be my next book or tv show. i ask them where i should go on a walk next week. i ask them what food i should try next, what hobby. and then i write it down in front of them.

the truth is some stuff slips through the cracks. but most of the time? within two weeks, i get to send my favorite kind of text - so i tried the thing you were talking about and !

i have a new policy for split-second choices - it's better to try it. i have social anxiety. i have to talk myself into doing many things. i am constantly battling the desire to run away as far as my feet will take me. and then i stand up and i do the thing anyway. i make myself act and dance and sing. sometimes, yes, i know-immediately never again, i hate this. but most of the time - i just have fun with it.

i have a new mantra - nobody is scorekeeping. at the end of my life, there will be no grand reading of how many calories i'd been eating. no reviews on how many boring documentaries i forced myself through, no calculation on how many hours i endured an extremely dull educational podcast. and so what if i try karaoke and i don't actually nail it? so what if i stumble over my words while trying to make a public announcement? so what if i wear something too-showy to go to the grocery store? nobody there knows me, and: nobody's keeping score.

life doesn't resolve with a grade (i know, i was as shocked as everyone else when i realized it). i am not falling behind, because there's no curriculum to life that i should be following. there are no checkpoints; nobody is making sure i have a fully-furnished life resume. i am just here for as long as the earth will have me, and i get to decide what makes me happy.

i don't have a partner or a house or anything that is supposed to belong to people-my-age. i spend most of my time focusing on being kind, compassionate, ready to listen without restraint.

and honestly? i feel good. like actually. i kind of like it this way.

#the really ironic thing #is that the less i care what people think of me #the more friends i have #the more i get along with people easily #19 year old me would kill me for saying this bc she HATED when people said ''stop trying''#but it was that i wasn't trying to be their friend #i was trying NOT to be ME #i went from being like ''i think im too different for people to ever like me''#to a decade later being like #'' ah i'll be okay i get along with pretty much everyone ''#it was true about food too #i wasn't kind to my body and thought it could make me look a certain way #if i was pretty it would make up for the way i was internally very ugly #but im now in probably the best shape of my life #and i have pretty much kicked my eating disorder to the curb (goodbye die in a hole)#bc i spend SO much more time seeing the chance to work out as a FUN THING #bc i don't make myself ''follow the rules'' of working out -- i dance or jog or whatever my body wants to do instead #do you know how weird it is #to go from being a COMPLETELY alone kid like NOBODY will talk to you bc you're a social pariah #like bullied ALL THE TIME bc ur stupid and flighty and strange and too loud etc #to being like the exact same person but now people are like ..... ''ur smart and funny and charming and happy-go-lucky''#some of this does have to deal with the fact i got therapy and medication #and started being a better person and actually focusing on myself and the ways that i could improve #im gentler now. i don't crave attention in the same way. i don't mind things that used to destroy me #it DOES help that i finally got diagnosed with ADHD #anyway feelin things bc it's been 5 years of recovery <3

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aeb-art · 4 months

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soooo… i did another comic with geo (who of course belongs to @8um8le)! it ending up stretching the page quite a bit, so the rest is under the cut o7

and geo proceeded to win every single round of pool that night, the end, thank you for reading this far 🙇

i'm still not super confident in writing for geo, but i had too much fun with this to care ehehe 🥰 this is the year of indulgence, everyone!

edit: i just realized that I PUT THE CICUITS ON THE WRONG ARM! it's supposed to be on my right not my left, oh i'm so mad 😭💔

#2024 #stellar city #sc geo #sc ash #self insert #self ship #this is skipping foward a while in time from the new years comic damn i'll get to the inbetween later maybe idk #timeline would be nye kiss > stalling > actual confession > dates that are either confined to the mall or over video call > this #i think if it's not related to an event the security guards dress in civilian clothes to cause less of a scene if possible #shoutout to the furnace robot i'm in love with her also i decided that under her faceplate is a flamethrower i think that'd be fun #also i know realistically geo has clothes that aren't suits BUT the idea popped in my head of the mall toons having to fight him on his out #agrees to not wear a nice suit jacket and leave his shirt untucked on the condition that he can keep his gloves #like that's a ridiculous scenario but i lost it laughing #would you believe me if i said that's what made me do all of this #also the 'i won't let them ruin this' is also like… oh sweetheart how do you know YOU won't be the one to ruin it? lmao that'd be fun #i totally gave up on that last panel ngl i couldn't think of what to put on the signs lmao #okay i've rambled more than enough! everyone have a beautiful day/night xoxoxo love you mwah

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iknowwhereyousnoozeatnight · 2 months

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if ur still doing requests pls rem if not das all g

she’s chrysanthemum-coded to me <3

close-ups ig

#ask #death note #rem #very messy i apologize #was extra messy here because i was playing with a new brush and by that i mean a default brush that i've never touched before #i actually quite like it very fun i typically like brushes that are 100% or close to 100% opaque but this was fun i like how it layered #i think i'm gonna finalize my idea and perhaps render something fully for once because i feel up to it if flowers are involved #but i promise nothing #drew these left to right btw. there were also like 2 more but they were small and i gave up on them so wjatever #i like the last one the best i think i needed a bit to figure out how i wanted the petals to lay and i like that one the best #the silhouette feels good i like the shape the back i did start trying smth asymmetrical but rem is very symmetrical and i find the symmetr #paired with the wings feels very regal and powerful and almost cape-like as a silhouette which i am a fan of #if i did finish something i might add misa in which case i need to think of what flower she most resembles roses are too easy i need smth #else but i will decide that later bc i am writing this very late at night and now i'm gonna queue it up for tomorrow bc i am going somewher #so goodbye goodnight good day idk what time it is for you. so #WAIT I SHOULD DO RYUK TOO WAIT WAIT soon. soon. he will be a bug yes yessss wait wait if he's a bug i want misa to be butterfly themed #like maybe a beetle of some kind? no no no wasp? ant? i'll think abt it #light would prob be some sort of poisonous plant? idk if u have thoughts idk tell me i'm getting into this bc i'm deprived of springtime at #and it is making me silly :3 teehee anyway i will Think about this and get back to it soon enough #gooddbye bye bye sayonara you weeaboo shits idk. bye

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hawkeye-mrstrapper-pierce · 10 months

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after a long hiatus: Klinger & Mulcahy Version 2, Digital only. Bonus reference pic included below for fun

July 6, 2023

(version 1 where Klinger is different but Mulcahy is the same will be linked here)

#well so i usually sketch and/or ink out the drawing but just did digital for this one #this one is version 2 - which i call it that bc it's the later version of klinger of layer a billion as i tried to get better proportion.#whereas the 'version 1' was from far far earlier in the process #and i feel like the version 1 klinger suits the mulcahy Way WAY better as a pairing but klinger 2 as a standalone isn't so bad #but i'll post version 2 as well bc i like his bored expression in that (bored bc no kisses for klinger 🥺)#anyways i'll link them both #i think i'll try to redraw klinger after i have more practice. coming back from a LONG art hiatus and diving into this was fun but uhh well.#next time i'm doing 1 character at a time i think. at least until i remember how to set up my referrence station better so i can draw easier #hawkeye-mrstrapper-pierce #mash fanart #klinger #father mulcahy

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curiosityschild · 1 year

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Amphibiuary Days 11 + 15: Painted and 3D

A holdable friend

#amphibiuary2023 #hoo boy I put this one off for so long because I started it and was like #ehhhh this is not as fun as I was expecting lol #still had fun! just not my favorite thing to do #which is a good thing!#because I bought this at work a few years (!) ago and I keep having to stop myself from buying more ceramaic figures #every time we get more in because they are SO CUTE but I DON'T NEED THEM #and I think actually painting this one has cured me of that desire lol #this is a flattering angle and doesn't show his flaws lol #I put some of that snow texture paint on the back intending it to look like toad skin but it looks more like he is diseased #also! he lights up! but! when you turn the light on you can see all the poorly done brush strokes D: so the light will stay off :)#oh shoot I just remembered I meant to do a gloss top coat oh well I'll get to that later have a matte frogge

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magnifiico · 4 months

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if anyone is waiting for anything from me (be it an ooc response in IMs or some sort of beginning to an interaction), please know i'm not ignoring you or not disinterested! (ꈍ ‸ ꈍ✿)

i was sick all week last week and now we're diving headfirst into the holidays, so i've been a bit scatterbrained with remembering to reply to things — i guarantee it's me, not you ♡

ty for your patience; i'm stoked to explore dynamics together!

#˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ 《 ooc 》#i promise you i'm The Person who will read an IM and then think to myself “i'll reply to this in a sec!”#literally forget a second later #and then just forget the IM is there because there's no notification in my face anymore #that being said tho! i know i've had a few ooc discussions with some of you recently #about starting interactions that haven't kicked off the ground yet!#i PROMISE i'm HERE for those interactions and excited!#you have not been forgotten and we WILL do fun things together <3 #i appreciate everyone being patient in the meantime #also with the pjo show coming out tomorrow that's about to become my entire personality again #comfort content let's go u.u/#so i'll prolly be doing a lot more blog-hopping and giving my boy leo some extra love but!#none of that takes away from my eternal obsession with this man #and all of the dynamics i've discussed so far + any to look forward to in the future >w> stay tuned~

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mintjeru · 4 months

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in honor of us being blessed w/ more gaming leaks today: i've been contemplating his favorite dim sum dish for a while and finally decided on one >:D

cw for mentions of game leaks and food under the cut!

there are so many dim sum dishes to choose from so i basically had to hone in on one by ruling out categories

also i'm assigning him a fav dim sum dessert bc i feel like desserts deserve their own category ><

first of all, i intentionally did not consider larger dishes, such as salted fish fried rice, crispy soy sauce fried noodles, etc., bc technically you can get those at any chinese restaurant, not just a dim sum one

second, i'm excluding expensive dishes you'd typically only see at banquets, such as crab, lobster, etc., bc i'm trying to hc a dish he'd be able to order often when he goes out in a party of 4

third, since canto food is generally light and mild, i think he'd prefer this type of cuisine over food w/ strong spices or flavors. that isn't to say he can't handle or doesn't enjoy stronger tasting food, but i think milder dishes are what he'd go for if he wanted comfort food

now. since he has to stay in shape for his guard duty and performances, i don't think he'd like having fried food often. i think he'd prefer smth lighter so he wouldn't feel sluggish. this would exclude fried calamari, xo sauce stir fried cheung fun, fried pumpkin w/ salted egg yolk, etc.

i'm gonna rule out vegetable dishes too (sorry vegetables!!) bc even though they're good, they're typically not the highlight of dim sum

moving on to other dishes, i'm ruling out har gow and siu mai (don't come at me for this) bc of the fact that they're standard dim sum dishes. yes, they're yummy and are telling of the quality of the dim sum restaurant, but i don't think he'd say they're his Favorite dish out of all the options. i have nothing against har gow and siu mai ok, it's just that i don't think he'd pick one of those as his top favorite bc it's standard to order them every time you get dim sum anyway.

even after ruling all these dishes out, there are still a lot left at this point. so, to make my life easier and bc i felt like it, i decided to hc that gaming likes sweet food. you may ask why and my answer is 1. bc i can, 2. bc it would be gap moe of him to have an energetic, fiery personality while preferring gentle sweets, and 3. bc i can. again bc it's canto cuisine, it's mild sweetness he's looking for.

after deciding on this, the two dishes that came to mind were char siu bao and phoenix claws. it's really funny that i thought of char siu bao bc judging by the look of gaming's recently leaked specialty dish, it's steamed char siu bao.

additional hc: i think he really likes char siu bao, and if he had to pick he'd go for the steamed kind rather than the baked kind bc it's soft and fluffy. interestingly enough, i decided on this prior to the leaks about his specialty dish, the description of which says it's steamed. mhy and i are on the same wavelength fr.

that being said. i'm gonna rule out char siu bao specifically because it's food you can eat on the go. because the story blurb in gaming's drip marketing says he spends his leisure time at the dim sum restaurant, i think he'd want to order smth he doesn't usually get to eat and smth he can take his time enjoying.

in conclusion, i think his favorite dim sum dish would be phoenix claws, which fits those two criteria. it's sweet, a dish that you can only get at dim sum restaurants, and he can take his time savoring it.

as for his favorite dim sum dessert, i had an easier time deciding bc i decided on the steamed char siu bao preference hc beforehand. i'm gonna go with the steamed custard buns bc they have a gentle sweetness and are also soft and fluffy. do you see my vision here? it's all coming together.

thank you for coming to my ted talk, i love him a lot as you can see

#genshin gaming #i was tempted to hc a favorite tea for him but i don't think i can reason it out #it's more of a taste preference thing #also i had the fun idea of deciding his preferences for dishes like the steamed vs. baked char siu bao #or crispy noodles vs. flat stir fried rice noodles (idk how to romanize it so i'm describing it lol canto ppl you know what this is right)#maybe i'll do that later hehe #anyway. i've been thinking about him a lot and i'm super excited for him #his animations are gorgeous i really could go on and on about them #i also love how canto ppl are adopting him bc same he's my little guy and i'd defend him with my life #it's also extremely funny how ppl are saying he has the same or similar name as them or their relatives #i can also relate to that hahahaha

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fstbmp-a · 2 months

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This is probably the 20th time I've written this out (one for every day really) but. I know I said that by the end of the month I'd probably remake the blog, however

I think I'm putting the blog on an indefinite hiatus.

I know, that's the sentence that's said right before a blog ceases to exist forever, but something here just isn't clicking anymore. I'm not enjoying my time, despite my absolute best efforts. That something that made me enjoy my time here is gone and I can't replicate it just by brute forcing it anymore.

Maybe someday I'll be back, I do love this place, my characters, y'all's characters, etc. Though, for now, I think I need to stop lying to myself that I can just keep doing new things to suddenly bring back my interest for this place. It's not going to happen.

Thank y'all for all the fun we've had and, hey, maybe I'll be back sooner rather than later, maybe in a month, a week, etc. I could back down from this before the end of the week even. I just needed to put it out there that I think I'm burnt out here.

#my kingdom ;; ooc #awawawa... it's not fun writing this and i keep backing down from doing so #there's so many versions of this sitting in my drafts #i think i need to just hit Post Now instead of “waiting to see how i feel” because it always loops back around to. this.#so y'know. yeah. fuck it. maybe this whole thing will be for nothing and i'll be back in just a few days #but yeah i. i think i need to just go for a bit and see what that brings #feel free to hmu for my discord. i'll still be around. and like i said it's more than likely that i'll be back sooner than later #but so long and thanks for all the fish until then!

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skrunksthatwunk · 4 months

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yakuza: dead souls - american vibes, bigass guns, and why zombies are super weird to have in ryu ga gotoku thematically/ideologically speaking

so i've been playing dead souls recently (hell yeah hell yeah hell yeah) and although i'm having the time of my life with it, there was something about it that kinda felt off to me, and i think i've figured out what it was, but i'm gonna have to walk you through a bit of my thought process to get there.

my first instinct was that it felt... american? and upon further examination i think that boils down to a couple of things:

everyone suddenly has lots of guns and also way way bigger guns

high emphasis on individual heroism (this itself is quite typical for rgg, but it manifests differently here; more on that in a bit)

military/government incompetence, which must be solved by the right individuals having the biggest and bestest guns

[for the sake of transparency i will note that my experience with zombie media is pretty limited and skews american (and i myself am american), so that may create bias. however, the 'this feels american to me' instinct is a rare one for me even in genres where i have seen little/no non-american media, so i think the fact that it did occur to me is notable. what about dead souls triggered that response when little else has? that's why i examined it and, truthfully, i think there's merit in the idea itself.]

the first point is pretty self-explanatory. america's got more guns than it does people, and its gun worship is infamous. japan's ban on guns (aided by its being an island state) means there's far fewer guns in the country, as well as far fewer people with guns (and likely far fewer guns per gun owner, excepting arms dealers/smugglers) than somewhere without such a ban. obviously, there are guns anyway. due to their illegality they are clustered within the criminal population, which explains their presence within organized crime within the series. very few guns will be sitting around in the homes of otherwise law-abiding citizens.

and yet, when the zombie outbreak hits kamurocho, plenty of civilians suddenly have access to quite an arsenal. everyone has the knowledge they need to aim, fire, and reload smoothly and quickly; ammo is infinite for certain guns. characters we've never seen using firearms before suddenly have shotguns under their couches (looking at you, majima). it's not only very different from reality, it's very different from guns' place within the series up until this point, when they were limited weapons used primarily by the enemy.

and they're making a zombie shooter, so of course they would have to do this. it has to be unrealistic to be simultaneously in this setting and in this genre, in the same way that yakuza solving their problems with bareback fistfights instead of guns is itself both unrealistic and necessary to being the kinds of games rgg are.

my point is that this is a kind of focus on and valorization of gun ownership and competency unusual for the series and setting. further, it serves as an argument for why an armed, competent populace is crucial typical in american media.

which brings us to the third point (we'll get to 2 in a minute). guns are often marketed as self-defense weapons. the implication is that the government's defense of the individual (via law enforcement or the military, but particularly the former), are insufficient. this is objectively true. if someone pulls a gun on you at the gas station, will a cop manifest out of thin air to intercede? no. that's impossible. but if you have a gun, or if some bystander has a gun, you or they may be able to do something with that gun to stop the armed person. thus, there is an undeniable gap in the effective immediacy of such responses.

many gun advocates also point to the incompetence or insufficiency of law enforcement, even when they are present to stop an armed aggressor. the fact that law enforcement do not have a 100% success rate in protecting the citizenry is also objectively true.

so, when you are in danger, arming yourself increases your chances of being able to put down (or at least take armed action against) a present or potential threat. whether it is viewed it as a supplement to or a replacement for law enforcement, it is meant to make up for the shortcomings of the government's ability to completely protect all its citizens. it's a safety net for state failure.

back to dead souls. rgg has always centered political corruption in its stories, including politicians, the police, and sometimes even the military, though usually the former two. sometimes this is treated sympathetically (i.e. tanimura, a dirty cop, whose dirty-cop-ness allows him to work outside/against the law to help disadvantaged people, not unlike how kiryu views being a yakuza), and other times it's simply a matter of greed or lust for power (i.e. jingu).

however, something that's almost never touched on so clearly is government incompetence. when the government fails to help people or hurts them or does corrupt things, it's usually due to a competent, malicious bad apple who is removed from power by the end of the game. this implies holes in the system because it keeps happening all the time, but that's on a series-wide scale, a pattern ignored by the series in favor of the individual game solution of "this guy's gone now :) yay".

but in dead souls, the SDF's barracades fall, their men are killed, they are unable to help protect the people outside or inside the quarantine zone. they are weak in a way the government usually isn't in these games. and who is stronger than them? our individual good guys with guns. so we need to be armed because the government is weak and can't protect us. boom. america.

returning to point 2, i'd like to say that dead souls is not particularly more individualistic than any of the other games in the series (other than, perhaps, y7). rgg is an incredibly individualistic series, actually. its protagonists are usually men who defy, oppose, and skirt around the law as a way of helping others and doing what is truly right (with a few exceptions, like shinada and haruka). the romanticized view of the yakuza as a force for helping the community in the face of government incompetence is a real one, and one that tends to manifest itself most in kiryu and how the series treats him. it shows us yakuza who aren't willing to kill, yakuza who cry about honor and justice and humanity and brotherhood, yakuza who never dip their hands into less palatable crimes, or only do with intense regret (and only ever as part of their backstory). the beat-em-up style emphasizes this as well. i mean, what's more individualistic than a one-man army?

put more clearly, this series is about men defying legal and social laws and expectations to live in a way that feels right to them, and about making themselves strong enough to combat those who would get in their way. the individual is placed before the society in importance, (though generally in a way that benefits the community, because they are good guys who want to use that agency and power for good).

all of this is true in dead souls as well, technically. those who live on the outskirts of society are the ones who actually save the day, and the ones who go in there and save people rather than just walling them off and pretending like they don't exist. they have the guns, which are illegal and mark them as criminals, but this broken law is what gives them the power to save themselves when the government will not, and to save their community if they so choose.

where dead souls differs is in the nature of that strength.

rgg places a lot of emphasis on self-improvement, both of one's body and of one's character. do both of these, and you will be strong enough to back up your ambitions. what allows someone to carve their own path in life is the ability to put down ideological and physical resistance by having resolve and the ability to tiger drop whoever won't be swayed by your impassioned speeches. you make yourself a weapon. you make yourself strong. in dead souls, that strength comes from an external, material possession. strength is something you buy (or that you take from someone else). who is able to survive the apocalypse comes not from the heart, nor from rigorous training, but from who has the most, the biggest, and the most bestest guns. it's an intersection of capitalism, militarization, and individualism. simply, deeply american.

[when i was talking myself through this a few days ago, i spent a lot more time on the capitalism + individualism stuff, but i think i'll keep this moving. consider this aside the intermission]

dead souls also differs for a few other interlocking reasons. it can be described with this equation:

zombification of enemies + lethality of guns = loss of emphasis on redemption

if your best friend turned into a zombie, could you shoot them? or your child? or your lover? it's a common trope, but it's a damn good one. watching your family, your neighbors, your town, everyone turn into a husk of themselves, something that looks like them but cannot be reached, is deeply tragic. it's even more tragic when these husks are trying to kill you. unable to be reasoned with and unable to be cured, you must incapacitate them before someone innocent is hurt--or hurt, then themselves made dangerous; each loss adds to the number of threats surrounding you. your life is seen as more valuable than that of your zombified friend, not only because the zombie is attacking you and it's self defense, but because they are no longer a person to you. to be a zombie is to no longer be human; zombification is dehumanization.

and so in a series so focused on connection with one's community, on saving innocent civilians, often on saving kamurocho specifically, one would expect similar tropes to occur. even if one's friends aren't turned, perhaps the cashier at poppo you chat with sometimes is. it's the destruction of that community and of the members one has tertiary relationships with that i expect would occur most within a kamurocho zombie story, since they are likely unwilling to axe anyone more important than that, even if dead souls isn't canon. i'd especially expect to see that in the beginning, before the need to kill zombies rather than contain or redeem them becomes apparent.

this does not happen.

i cannot speak for the entire game, but i can speak of gameplay choices that affect this, and ones i think will not be subverted throughout, even if they are somewhat contradicted by plot events i am presently unaware of.

kamurocho is not a community to protect, nor is it filled with your fellows. it is a playground filled with infinitely respawning, infinitely mow-downable, infinitely disposable zombies. you are meant and encouraged to kill them by the thousands, and never to hesitate or consider whether they may be cured or who may be mourning them. who may be unable to identify their loved one because you were trying to reach a headshot goal from hasegawa. you are not meant to consider them as human, nor beings that were once human, nor beings that could be human again, in the eyes of the zombie shooter. they are merely bodies, targets, and obstacles.

the zombies are contrasted with the true humans, those barricading themselves within the quarantine zone or those living in ignorance outside it. humans are meant to be saved, zombies are meant to be killed. the player character is the only one who can truly help with either of these goals, because the other humans are cowardly, ignorant, or unarmed/helpless. you must be their savior. to be a savior is to eliminate zombies, who are less than human.

the black and white nature of this is also emphasized by another gameplay characteristic: the lack of street encounters. when you traverse the peaceful parts of kamurocho, you are never attacked. you are also never directly attacked by the humans within the quarantine zone. kamurocho feels very different without its muggers and hooligans, but it's because this is a zombie shooter, not a beat-em-up. in a normal rgg title, you'd subdue threats by punching, kicking, and throwing them. you'd use your body in (supposedly) nonlethal ways. dead souls does not have a combat system meant for civilians. you have your guns. you subdue threats by shooting them, preferably lethally. the game doesn't want you to do that to humans, so you never fight humans. this furthers the black and white divide between the salvation-worthy, noble humans and the death-worthy, worthless zombies. combat is only lethal, and only used against the inherent other.

this leads me to the part of dead souls i find most conflicting with the ethos of rgg broadly, and perhaps its greatest ideological/thematic failing.

because the enemy are incurable, dangerous, and inhuman, you must kill them to protect yourself and others, others who are still human. humanity is something that is lost or preserved, but never regained. once someone's gone, they're gone, and you not only must kill them, it is your duty and your right to kill them. you should kill them.

in dead souls, there is no redeeming the enemy.

and that's a big problem.

rgg is about a lot of things, but a key one is the ability of people to change for the better. its most memorable, beloved villains are those who see the light by the end and change their wicked ways (usually through some form of redemptive suicide, though that's another essay in itself). its pantheon of characters is full of those who come from questionable backgrounds struggling to be the best people they can be, to live as themselves authentically and compassionately. it's about the good and the love you can find in the moral and legal gray zones of life/society, and the potential/capacity for good all of us have, no matter how far we may have fallen. it is a hopeful series. it is a merciful series.

this is something bolstered by its gameplay. countless substories are resolved by punching a lesson into someone until they improve their behavior, either out of fear or genuine remorse/development. the games don't just discourage killing your enemies, they don't allow you to (yes, we've all seen the "kiryu hasn't killed anybody? umm. look at this heat action" stuff before, and while they've got a point, i believe it's the narrative's intent that none of this is actually lethal, based on how laxly it treats certain plot injuries (cough cough. y7 bartender) and the actual concept of taking a life, the gravity it is given by the text, particularly when it comes to characters crossing that threshold into someone who has killed. explicit killing is not an option open to you, even when you're being attacked by dozens and dozens of armed men. conflicts are resolved by simply beating up enough guys in this nonlethal manner.

but dead souls is a shooter. to avoid conflict with the series' moral qualms about letting its characters kill, the enemies cannot be human. furthermore, the zombie shooter genre can only fit within the series if its zombies are completely inhuman. this means their pasts as humans cannot be acknowledged, nor the possibility of a cure, nor the characters' own potential conflicts about killing them; or, at least, not in a way that impedes their or the player's ability to gun them down afterwards.

if you can't kill humans in your series, then it cannot be possible to save (in this case, rehumanize) zombies. this is especially true in a game where you are unable to fight humans, and thus human lives are universally more valuable than zombie lives. because if you kill a zombie that can be cured, you are, in a way, killing a human.

and so, in a series where you should always assume your enemies (and everyone, for that matter) are capable of reason, compassion, change, and redemption, and where they are always worth that effort, even if they reject it in the end, dead souls' enemies are irredeemable and only worth swift, stylish slaughter. there are only good guys and bad guys. good guys must be protected, lest they be turned irreversibly into bad guys. good guys are only protected by killing bad guys, and the only way to save good guys is to kill every last one of the bad guys. do not spare them, and do not ask whether or not it's right. only kill.

i love dead souls. it's a silly game. i like seeing daigo in decoy-drag and majima gleefully cartwheeling his way through zombies and ryuji with his giant gun arm prosthetic. it's fun. but when i was trying to figure out what felt off about it to me, one of the words that came to mind (besides american) was indulgent. that, too, felt odd, because i love indulgent media. i am not one to scorn decadent, hedonistic, beautiful high-calorie slop type media. if dead souls was just fan servicey, that wouldn't really bother me. i am a fan and boy do i feel serviced. it rocks. but i think my problem is in what dead souls is indulging.

i think dead souls indulges in the desire to cut loose, and to see these characters cut loose. thing is, they're cutting loose all over kamurocho, and all over the bodies of people they used to (at least in concept) care for. with lethal weapons. it is catharsis via bloodbath, not by pushing your body and mind to the limit in man to man combat, but by pulling a trigger before the other guy can hurt you, or even think about hurting you, for the crime of existing as the wrong kind of thing.

and i just don't think that's in line with rgg's beliefs.

yes, it's probably fair for dead souls' characters to kill zombies. i'm not against that. i'm also not against games letting you do purposeless violence. i spent a good amount of my elementary school years killing oblivion npcs for shits, like. that's not what bothers me about dead souls.

rgg as a series has always taken a hard stance in both its game design and narrative choices against killing and for the potential for redemption in its enemies. and i think the lengths to which it goes to promote that despite the probably-lethal moves you do and the improbability of a harmless do-gooder yakuza is one of the most endearing things about the games. so for this one entry to disregard that key theme for the sake of a genre shift that flopped super hard, well? i dunno. it feels weird i guess. it's out of place not just because it's a dramatic shift in gameplay and style and also zombies are only a thing here (and the supernatural/fantastical are thus only prominent here), but because of what those shifts imply.

so, uh. yeah. my pre-dead-souls thoughts that dead souls wasn't that out of pocket bc rgg's just kinda weird? turns out it was actually super weird to have a zombie shooter in there, but for way way deeper reasons than anyone gives it credit for.

(footnotes in tags)

#1) i deemphasized the physicality of shooting to emphasize my points about the viscerality and personal nature of rgg #brawls and the colder more detached nature of gun use relative to that but i do NOT mean that shooting has no physical component to it #obviously it takes a lot of skill to shoot quickly and accurately and lugging a bigass gun around kamurocho would tucker me out for sure #2) no i don't think all those things i said were american were usa-exclusive. it's a big world out there. i'm just saying those things #combined feel like a particularly american flavor of thing to me #3) there's probably more to be said about the connection between wanton killing and american styling or anti-immigration theming in zombie #stories or dead souls But i figured that was a bit too disconnected to the funny zombie game. this shit was a lot anyway y'know?#4) also i don't think most of this was intentional on the part of rgg studios. i genuinely think they just wanted to make a fun zombie #shooter and didnt really think about it all that hard. whenever you make smth there's gonna be implications you never considered. it happen #5) is it ballsy to write a giant essay on a game i'm like 1/4 the way through? yes. i've done smarter things. i'll revisit it when im done #if i'm wrong then i'll figure it out probably. but like. i don't think they'd set up the hasegawa objective stuff or have akiyama just #unflinchingly start shooting zombies and then later challenge that. we'll see but my hopes aren't high y'know? i know rgg #6) i should also clarify that violent catharsis is a) a part of all rgg games and b) cool as hell. it's the lethal bit that doesn't fit with #the series y'know?#rgg #ryu ga gotoku #yakuza #like a dragon #yakuza dead souls #dead souls #classic skrunk 4 hr middle of the night impulse essay hooorayy

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