#i still really want a faithful adaptation of God Loves Man Kills but fuck it this is still good!
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Bastion's more than just an easter egg in Forge's photographs
He's holding Magneto hostage and recreating scenes from Reservoir Dogs and loving every second of it
Xavier is coming back to Earth
Bastion's working with Mister Sinister, master geneticist and lover of unholy and powerful abominations
WE'RE GETTING ONSLAUGHT, LADS
#i still really want a faithful adaptation of God Loves Man Kills but fuck it this is still good!#sloot watches#.x men#x men 97 spoilers#x men 97 episode 7#also i would prefer if Remy stayed dead. im so sick of status quo reversions and that would make 3 death turnarounds#Xavier. Now Magneto. If they bring Remy back via time travel shenanigans it would just nullify a lot of the power in Rogue's grief#Like at least with Madelyne being brought back im fine bc the Phoenix is just a Get Out of Permadeath card for her and Jean
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SP 1999 EPISODE 1 LIVEBLOG
Opening titles slap pretty hard
Starting with a flashback, nice
IS THAT MARGUERITE AND ARMAND'S PARENTS? DID THEY SOMEHOW MANAGE TO MAKE ST CYR EVEN WORSE THAN BEFORE? WHAT THE FUCKKKK
"Learn from this!" Sir this is going to bite you so hard in the ass its unreal, and you deserve it
Why are they putting down newspaper lmao
Oh that's why okay
Is he a league member that theyve captured? Are the French actually semi-competent in this adaptation?
YOU DO NOT IMPLY THAT CHAUVELIN HAS BEEN RIPPING OFF TOENAILS AND THEN CUT TO THE NEXT SCENE WHATS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE
HERE COME THE LEAGUE LETS GOOOO
*does a gay little run that pisses you off*
Emilia fox will you marry me
OH MY GOD IT WAS ARMAND DOING THE GAY LITTLE RUN, BBC ARE FUELING MY GAY LITTLE ARMAND THOUGHTS
Excuse me bbc it has been almost 10 minutes and I have seen no Marguerite at all, you are depriving me of my wife
FUCKING HELL THATS FULL ON TORTURE THIS IS DARK
Richard E Grant you smooth mfer
They weren't joking that man really has no toenails left jesus
Forget my earlier comment, the French are still incompetent I guess
Oooooo chavvy wants to go to englandddd
Does this mean we get Marguerite soon? Please say we do
NOOOOOO DONT ARREST ARMAND LEAVE MY SON ALONE
DAMN ARMANDS GOT BITCHES
At least they're letting him get dressed before they arrest him
Awwwww he saved her, that's my boy
GET YOUR HANDS OFF THAT LITERAL CHILD YOU GROWN ASS SOLDIER FFS
Mr No Toenails is so gonna die
"Don't trust her" STOP BEING SO FUCKING OMINOUS BEFORE YOU DIE
MARGUERITE!!!!!!!!! Ough she's so gorgeous I want to dieeeeee
Oh fuck he totally took the guys words as "Don't trust Marguerite" goddammit
OH YEAH PERCY HOW DARE YOUR WIFE WHO YOU MARRIED WANT TO DANCE WITH YOU WHAT A TERRIBLE INSULT
Suzanne and Andrew <333333333
Percy Blakeney making sex jokes is something I never knew I needed
Marguerite St Just I would die for you
The only version of the pimpernel poem that rivals the musical in campiness
Chauvelin has no rizz, no matter how hard he may try
NOT PERCY SPILLING WINE ON CHAUVVYS CRAVAT
Percy basically just said "the cravat is the powerhouse of the cell"
Man's just wrote a dissertation on cravats
Ooooooooo the Prince is sassy
WHO JUST SLAPPED MY WIFE WHO DO I HAVE TO KILL
ANGELE ST CYR? OH FUCK THE GIRLS ARE GONNA BE FIGHTINGGGGG
Not this guy challenging percy to a duel while his voice sounds halfway to cracking through the whole speech
I could watch Richard E Grant's Percy all day oh my god
The guy they're about to guillotine looks like a sad puppy
Sleebpy Marguerite
They are literally so close to actual communication and talking through their issues that it HURTS, STOP BEING IDIOTS AND GET OVER YOURSELVES SO YOU CAN STOP BEING MISERABLEEEEEEEE
Ah here comes the Armand blackmail
Oooooo they're letting the marriage issues out at parties
HERE COME THE CHAMBERTIN JOKES
They're being so mean to him and its amazing
HOLY SHIT THEY HAVE HER TELL PERCY ABOUT ARMAND AS PERCY AND NOT THE PIMPERNEL! GO BBC YOU DO THAT FUNKY FAITHFUL ADAPTATION STUFF WE LOVE TO SEE IT
ST JUST BACKSTORY HAND IT OVER I CRAVE ITTTTTTT
PERCY YOU FUCKING LOSER HELP YOUR WIFE UGH YOURE SO MEAN TO HER
(I know he's going to do something but still I wish he could just tell her)
You go babygirl rip that letter from your husband up
Chauvvy with the hair down and morning hair <3
Get Chambertin's ass, Margot
MARGUERITE NO DONT TELL HIM THE HIDING PLACEEEE
Is she figuring it out? Did the injury give Percy away to her omg
SHES GOING TO THE STUDY BOYS SHES GONNA FIGURE HIM OUT
SECRET PIMPERNEL COMPARTMENT LETS GOOO
And that's where the episode ends!
So far I'm loving the show, following the book pretty comprehensively, and has managed to get plenty of the plot into a single episode, can't wait to see more
#sky liveblogs#sky watches sp1999#the scarlet pimpernel#richard e. grant#elizabeth mcgovern#martin shaw#the scarlet pimpernel 1999
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Dracula Daily Day 86
IT’S THE BIG ONE
Dr. Seward’s Diary
Renfield nooooo I’m so upset
Dracula how dare you beat my boy like this I’m in PAIN
AND NOW YOU GO AND BLAME HIM FOR THIS? LIKE HE DID IT TO HIMSELF???
Dr. Abe this is so not an accident what are you talking about
Arthur and Quincey heard the plot needed them and who are they to refuse?
Can we save his life because he’s a human and a good bean and not just because he has information? Like please?
HE’S ALIVE!!!
“What’s wrong with my face?” I’m DISTRAUGHT
DON’T DIE
“I must go back to death - or worse” DRACULA HOW COULD YOU
The way Renfield capitalizes He like Dracula is a god, or on a level with God is so telling without saying much at all
Ugh this poor thing has been a victim this entire time. And Jack just looks at him like a science experiment.
“I don’t care for the pale people” AAAHH MINA
Everything hurts and I’m dying
He tried to SAVE her BABY RENFIELD AAGHGH.
Oh cool we’ve gotten what we wanted so we’re just ditching im I guess.
Quincey I love you but I think saving her from becoming a vampire is more important than silly Victorian propriety
DRACULA GET AWAY FROM HERRRR.
It’s truly disgusting how many adaptations saw this scene with Dracula drinking from Mina and decided “romantic? Sexy? Soulmates???”
BUT THE SUITOR SQUAD GOT THIS FUCK OUTTA HERE
Noooo Mina ;~;
This part is destroying me
Jonathan seeing his wife distress and immediately going “I’m going to kill the fucker” is glorious
Mina and Jonathan are relationship goals
“I much touch him or kiss him no more” “aww hell no” Jonathan is the most ride or die ever. Given the choice between Mina or God and he chooses Mina I LOVE this sweet boy
NOOO THE RECORDS. But it’s okay, Mina’s the best and saved everything
RENFIEEEEELDDDDD
PTERODACTYL SCREECH
BABYYYY NOOOOO
Quincey and his bats, man.
I’m so upset
The story of Dracula slipping in to attack Mina is just as horrifying the second time around
“A little refreshment” ewww
“What have I done to deserve such a fate” NOTHING MINA YOU’RE PERFECT AND WE’RE PRIVILEGED TO HAVE YOU HERE
And there goes Jonathan’s hair
Jonathan Harker’s Journal
Jonathan stressing makes me stressed
God’s not helping you, your friends are helping you
RENFIEEEEEELLLLLLLD
He tried to save Mina and this is what he gets
This attendant sucks at his job and now my SWEET BOY IS DEAD.
Nothing should have been kept from Mina in the first place dammit
“I shall die!” MINAAAA.
Van Helsing’s right for once, that’s not actually going to help anything.
Yes, lockpicking, much better than breaking in.
At least Mina doesn’t have fangs yet, that’s a good sign
Way to go Van Helsing, you made Mina cry again.
And then you burned her head. You’re handling this extremely poorly, man.
Poor Mina :( Girl just wants to live her life
“She shall not go into that unknown and terrible land alone” AWWWW. JONATHAN YOU ARE THE SWEETEST.
This is so romantic it’s melting my black dead heart
“I have written this in the train” Just like the beginning of the book, that’s a beautiful callback.
“The place smells so vilely” perhaps that’s because you just lit a cigar, Art (yes, I know it’s Vamp Stink)
Dr. Seward’s Diary
It always seems like a long wait when we’re waiting for Arthur and Quincey.
Jonathan babyyyy
Yeah, Jack, you’ve got nothing on Jonathan I’m sorry
So, if Dracula was a scholar, are we… condemning the seeking of knowledge over faith? Is that what’s happening here?
The zoophagous patient had a NAME, dammit
Jonathan is out for BLOOD. And not in the vampire way
There’s Dracula, it’s battle time!
Jonathan where the HELL did you get a kukri
Damn. SO close.
All this and Mina’s still trying to put on a brave face
Can we stop talking about Mina’s purity because that’s giving off some really icky Madonna-whore stuff
These two love each other so freaking much
Stoker’s letting his boys cry again you love to see it
I am also in tears by the way if you even care
Jonathan Harker’s Journal
I too thought today would never end
“My poor wronged darling” awww
It’s okay, guys, Quincey’s here to protect you :’)
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Tagged by @elmindredaniq to say my 9 favorite films which thank you hon!
Okay so the problem with me and movies is that whenever someone asks me about my favorites I suddenly forget every movie to ever exist and also I can't really categorize any movie in like really "favorite" category but I'll show and tell y'all some movies that are very dear to me.
1. the half of it
Okay so this movie is such a comfort to me? Like it's about this blossoming friendship between a local himbo and a lesbian and there is a sapphic love story in the background and it's so soft and tender and gentle. The thing is I love friendships and I think we focus so little on them and this one just scratched the itch, like noone gets the final girl at the end but he does chase after that fucking friend after his lesbian best friend because he loves her. Platonically, and idk just the way he tried to get along with her father and the way she tried to support his dreams and just platonic soulmates do things to me. And the cinematography is stunning. And like I said we do get a wlw storyline, like what can I girl want more?
2. Spiderman into the spiderverse.
It's fun, it's comfort, the art is fucking amazing, the story too, the leap of faith moment? Fucking legendary, i will never not be in awe of it. The son-father relationship? The found family?THE SOUNDTRACKS AND MOTIFS WITHIN IT I'm just grrrr brain go brrrr.
3. Pride & Prejudice.
I will never not love this movie, it's just so *screams*, the touches, mr darcy, how fucking joyful it is, how gentle, also I just love pride and prejudice and I'm sorry to every other adaptation but in my mind this is the one and it has nothing to do with my crush on Keira Knightley, not even a little (it does but shhh)
4. Jennifer's Body.
First of all my queer awaking, like this movie said, yes YOU DO LIKE GIRLS, like the kiss scene has done things to me and I have never been the same. I love this movie, it's for the girlies about that girlies and man get eaten, what more one could want?
5. 10 things I hate about you
C'mon it's a classic. We all love it, honestly Pat IS our pretty boi™ and the only men ever and Kat is so snarky and bitchy as she deserves, also it's just such a fun watch.
6. The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
It's campy, it's horny, it's loud, it's out there, it's fun and it's queer. Like definitely a comfort watch. Do I think there are some questionable things™ in it? Yes but i don't care, I love it, it's my queer comfort film and you could pry it off of ny dead cold hands.
7. I Killed My Mother
Listen, this movie shaped me. Like nothing understood my relationship with my mother when I was younger as this movie and sure some other movies that did have came out since then but by God was it the culprit of my younger self angst. I will never forget some lines from this movie, it's deeply ingraved in my brain. It also has a queer side story.
8. Whisper of the heart.
It's definitely a comfort watch, definitely even more so since I'm a writer myself. Like this movie is just so fucking kind if it comes to art and the love story God, my standards for love have risen since I watched it. I mean all Ghibli movies are good but by god this one is just making me feel things.
9. Love and Leashes.
Listen, this movie is just, I want to eat it. Sometimes still all I can think about is the pulling wax scene and the scene where she fucking steps over him in her heels, like I'm just so *AAAaaaaaaaaa* about it.
Honorary mentions; Tangled, How to Train Your Dragon, Kill Your Darlings, Kiki's Delivery Service
And my polish little precious queer movie that I treasure very much since I am polish and queer: Hiacynt
So yeah, probably if I thought a little longer the list would be different and longer and stuff but that's it.
I'm tagging @daltoneering @rainbowcolored7 @bestiesincrime @mortimerlatrice and @kin-kinn but like no pressure if you don't want to do it 🥰
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I've always wondered this, but what do you think the Cullen's political viewpoints would be, given their individual backgrounds? if vampires don't change after they turn, then surely they would all be extremely racist (especially Jasper). would this not come up at some point? they aren't like the Volturi because the Volturi are too old to care, but the Cullens are young enough that they have been brought up with opinions on stuff like sexism, racism, homophobia and the like.
Oh fuck.
You get an early answer because otherwise I'll just chicken out and delete this one, pretend I never saw it.
UMMM.
Since I'm guessing you meant American political viewpoints, we need a disclaimer. I am not American, and not too knowledgeable about your politics. Not just in the sense that I don't follow the day-to-day drama, but as I am not an American citizen there are several things I don't know, can't know because I've never lived in your country and therefore can't know what the effects of living in a country ruled by American policies is like. What I do know is based off of the news in the foreign section, social media (by which I mean tumblr posts), and Trevor Noah's Daily Show.
I am an outsider looking in.
Which is really rather appropriate, since the Cullens are too.
The Cullens go to high school and college, Carlisle works, they pay taxes, they own real estate, and submerge themselves in American culture. Esme, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, and Bella are young enough that this is in many ways their world, and apart from timeouts they've more or less spent their entire lives, human and vampire, integrated into American society.
Not fully integrated, mind you, they do what they need to to fit in and get to school or, in Carlisle’s case, to work. They go no further. No extra-curriculars for the kids, no book clubs for Esme, no game nights for Carlisle. They walk parallel to humans, not among us.
In addition to this they're obscenely rich, which puts them another thousand miles from the experiences of your average American. They won't deal with the health system, which means healthcare is a non-issue, they're not going to need welfare or other social programs, unemployment is another non-issue. Name your issue, and the Cullens don't have personal stake in it. Even the climate crisis won't be a problem for them the way it will for us.
What I'm trying to say is, American political issues are a concept to them, not a lived reality. Just like they are for me. So hey, you made a great choice of blog to ask.
I'll also add here that you say the Volturi are too old to care, and I agree- from an ancient's point of view, racism is a matter of "which ethnicity are we hating today?", and it all looks rather arbitrary after a while. Same with every other issue - after a while it all just blends together into "what are the humans fighting over today? Which Christian denomination is the correct one? Huh. Good for them, I guess."
I can't put it any better than this post did, really. The Volturi are real people, humans are nerds and tumblr having Loki discourse. Aro thinks it's delightful and knows entirely too much about Watergate (and let's be real, Loki discourse as well), but the point I wanted to get at is that politics really don't matter to vampires.
And I don't think they matter to the Cullens either.
So, moving on to the next point while regretting I didn't put headlines in this post, I'll just state that I don't think vampires' minds are frozen. Their brains are unable to develop further, and they can never forget anything, but... well, this isn't the post for that, but in order for this to be true of vampires they would barely be sentient. They would not be able to process new impressions, to learn new things, nor to have an independent thought process. Yes, we see vampires in-universe (namely, Edward, who romanticizes himself and vampires) believe they're frozen and can never change, but there is no indication that this is a widespread belief, or even true. Quite the contrary - Carlisle went from a preacher's son who wanted to burn all the demons to living in Demon Capital for decades and then becoming a doctor and making a whole family of demons. Clearly, the guy has had a change in attitude over the years. Jasper, in his years as a newborn army general, slowly grew disenchanted with his life and developed depression. James initially meant to kill Victoria and hunted her across the earth, then became fascinated and changed his mind about it.
Had these people been incapable of change, Carlisle would still be hating demons, Jasper would be in Maria's army, and James would still be hunting Victoria.
It goes to follow, then, that they are able to adapt to new things.
The question is, would they?
Here I finally answer your question.
So, we have these people who don't really have any kind of stake in politics, who keep up to date all the same (or are forcibly kept up to date because high school) and are generally opinionated people.
Where do they then fall, politically?
(And this is where you might want to stop reading, anon, because I'm about to eviscerate these people.)
Alice votes for whoever's gonna win. She also makes a fortune off of betting each election. Trump's 1 to 10 victory in 2016 was a great day to be Alice. MAGA!
The actual policies involved are completely irrelevant, she does this because it's fun. Election means she gets to throw parties. Color coded parties for the Republican and Democratic primaries, and US-themed parties for Election Night! (Foreigner moment right here: I at first wrote "Election wake" before realizing that's not what y'all murricans call it.)
Alice loves politics. Doesn't know the issues, but she sure loves politics.
Bella votes Democrat. She actually knows about the issues, and cares about them. This girl is a Democrat through and through.
Carlisle doesn't vote. I can't imagine it feels right. Outside of faked papers he's not a US citizen, this is meddling in human affairs that he knows don't concern him.
More, this guy has never lived in a democracy.
In life, Carlisle lived under an absolute monarchy that, upon civil war, became an absolute theocracy. From there he learned that vampires live under a total dictatorship.
For the first 150 years of his life, democracy was that funky thing the Athenians did in history books thousands of years ago, no more relevant to him than the Ancient Egyptian monarchy is to me. Then the Americans, and later other European countries started doing this.
Good for them.
There's this mistake often made by those who view history from a... for lack of a better term, a solipsistic standpoint. A belief that the present day is the culmination of all of history. “My society is the best society, the most reasonable society; all the others had it backwards. Thank god we’re living in this enlightened age!”
The faith in our current system of government is one such belief. We (pardon me if this doesn’t apply to everybody reading this post) have grown up in democracies, being told this is the ultimate form of rule, and perhaps that is true - but remember the kings who have told their subjects they had were divine and the best possible ruler based on that. Remember also that most modern democracies haven’t actually been democracies for very long at all, America is the longest standing at some 230 years (not long at all in the grand scope of things) and they have a fracturing two-party system to show for it.
Every society, ever, has been told they’re the greatest, and their system of government the most just. Democracy is only the latest hit.
This is relevant to Carlisle because he’s immortal and decidedly not modern. Democracy has not been installed in him the way it was the rest of the Cullens, Jasper included. To him- well, it’s just not his world. He has no stakes in our human politics, and as he is older than every current democracy and has seen quite a few of them fall, he’s not going to internalize the democratic form of rule the way a modern human has.
I think the concept of voting is foreign to him.
It requires a level of participation in human society that he’s simply not at. He does the bare minimum to appear human so he do the work he loves, but nothing more, and I find that telling.
As it is I think he'd be iffy about his family doing it. He won’t stop them, but in voting they’re... well it’s kind of cheating. They’re not really citizens, none of this will affect them, and by voting they’re drowning out the votes of real human voters. He does not approve.
Edward votes Democrat. He's... well he’s the kind of guy who will oil a girl’s bedroom window so he can more easily watch her sleep without being discovered, justifying it to himself as being okay because if she were to tell him to get lost he’d stop immediately. Same guy is so sure that he’d leave and never return again if she wanted him to, except this is the man who returned to Forks to hang around his singer, knowing there was a significant chance he might kill her. To say nothing of his Madonna/Whore complex, or of the fact that he tried to pimp out his wife twice, and was willing to forcibly abort her child.
This guy is very much in love with chivalry, with being an enlightened and feminist man who supports and respects women, while not understanding the entire point of feminism, which is female liberation.
He votes Democrat because he’s such an enlightened feminist who cares about women’s rights.
Emmett doesn’t care to vote, but if he has to he votes Republican. The guy is from the 1930′s, and has major would-be-the-uncle-who-cracks-racist-jokes-if-he-was-older vibes.
Esme doesn’t vote, that would require getting out of the house.
More, I just... can’t see it. I can’t see her being one to read up on politics and The Issues, period, but if she has to then I doubt she’d be able to decide.
Jasper doesn’t vote. Alice can have her fun, he does not care.
There’s also the whole can of worms regarding the last time he went to bat for American politics.
I imagine he stays out of this.
Renesmée doesn't vote. She has no stock in the human affairs. Who would she vote for, on what grounds? When Bella tries to pull her to the urns, she points out that she's three years old.
Rosalie, guys, I’m sorry, but that girl is definitely gonna vote Republican. Perhaps not right now as it’s become the Trump party of insanity, but the Mitt Romney type of Republicans? Oh yes.
And for the record, yes I imagine she does vote. To step back from politics would be another way she was relinquishing her humanity, and that’s not allowed to happen. So, yes, she goes to the urns, less for the sake of the politics involved and more because like this, she’s still a part of society in some way.
Now, onto why I think she’s Republican, I think it’s both fiscal and social.
This girl was the daughter of a banker who somehow profited off of the Depression, and who then became part of a family with no material needs that would soon become billionaires thanks to Alice. Poverty to Rosalie is a non-issue, as it is I imagine she views it as a much lesser issue than what she’s had to deal with. The humans can pull themselves up by their bootstraps, Rosalie’s infertility is forever.
Rosalie’s empathy is strongest when she’s able to project onto others, and she won’t be able to project onto the less fortunate at all.
Then there’s the fact that the Republican party is all about traditional family values, and pro-life.
Rosalie, a woman from the 1930′s who idolizes her human life and who‘d love nothing more than to get to live out this fantasy, is down for that. And as of Breaking Dawn she’s vocally pro-life, so there’s that.
This all being said I don’t think Rosalie cares to sit down and fully understand these politics she’s voting for, the possible impact they’ll have- that’s not important. What’s important is what voting does for her.
TL;DR: I bet anon regrets asking.
#long post#twilight#twilight vampires#twilight meta#twilight renaissance#politics#history#twilight history#carlisle cullen#alice cullen#bella swan#renesmée cullen#jasper hale#rosalie hale#emmett cullen
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Me and Em have now played House of Ashes so here’s how things went :D
Em: *sees Naram-Sin’s temple* haha, cock mouth
Guard: *is rude to Kurum*
Me: don’t be so fucking rude! *stabs him*
Em: I’m a General, I’m faithful to my King *murders the Gutian woman*
Us @ Balathu and Kurum: enemies to lovers speed run
Vampires: and we said no~
Em: *playing Eric as a sentimental romantic who just wants to salvage his marriage to Rachel*
Me: *determined to destroy their marriage*
Me: awww, Salim leaves so many nice notes to tell Zain that he loves him ^^
Em: you get wholesomeness while my guys are just making yo mama jokes >:I
Us: Joey is pure and must be protected at all costs
Joey: *dies*
Us: *surprised pikachu face*
Me, with Em at gun point: I could shoot you like in the Man of Medan prologue :)
Em: please don’t ;-;
Eric: *running around screaming for Rachel*
Us: dude now is not the time
Salim: *falls into the temple’s mouth*
Em: haha, he fell down the cock mouth
Me: wow, all this time and he was still prepared for a random phallus
Us: *immediately looking for shinies the moment we’re in control*
Nick: Jason!
Me in the Heavy Rain voice: JASON!
Em as Eric: I just want them to be in love
Me as Rachel: divorce, divorce, divorce
Dar: is this thing working?
Me: this man can’t even use a radio, how did he even become a captain?
Clarice: *standing there*
Us: hm, don’t like that camera angle
Clarice: *gets yoinked*
Us: DON’T LIKE THAT
Jason: Nick, you’re choking him!
Me: *hammers the QTE*
Merwin: *dies*
Me: oopsie
Me: I am not uncovering that thing, I refuse
Game: *creature gets out from under the truck anyway*
Me: I stand by my decision
Em: why do we have so much rope?
Me: we’ve got 50ft of it, like in DnD
Em: it is just like DnD
Me: doesn’t gas go off?
Em: meh, improvise, adapt and overcome
Em: I saw a picture of Rachel falling down a long triangular shaft!
Me: ...sounds like you found the cock after all
Em: pfft
Eric: I want you back Rache
Me: dude I’ve told you it’s over like five times today, get over it
Em: look, this is the closest I’ll ever get to romancing Ashley Tisdale, just let me have this
Dar @ Eric: I’m going to ruin this entire guy’s day
Me: cut the rope!
Em: NO, I REFUSE!
Me: do it, do it, do it!
Eric: *gets shot and impaled*
Me: fuckin f my dude
Clarice: *saves Rachel*
Me: hi ma’am are you romanceable?
Kurum: *steps into the frame behind Clarice and Rachel*
Me: SANDALS MAN!
Em: *dying of laughter while I try to explain what I just saw*
Me: *not paying attention because I was playing with blue tac*
Rachel *misses the QTE while crossing the chasm*
Me: FUCK!
Rachel: *is fine*
Me: oh thank fuck, anyway semper fi, we’re not abandoning Clarice
Clarice: *falls and dies*
Me: *surprised pikachu face*
Dar: there are no vampires
Me: this guy is the luckiest dumb fucker walking
Vampires: *breaking into the temple*
Me: GIVE ME THE BIG GUN!
Jason: we need to fall back!
Me: GIVE ME THE BIG GUN!
Rachel: *gets on the machine gun*
Me: YESSSSS!!!!
Me: SHARPAY EVANS SAID NO CALL BACKS!!!!
*way too many hsm jokes in general including renditions of we’re all in this together*
Me: I guess Dar is our new Eric
Dar: *dies*
Me: oh wow, he really was our new Eric!
Us @ Jason and Salim: enemies to lovers 2.0
Nick: we need to talk about us
Em: is this really the time?
Jason: *says something dumb*
Me: Jason really is this game’s repressed gay, huh?
Em: yep, canon, 100%
Em: this is literally just Alien and I hate it
Em: this is when the xenomorph jumps out, wtf I hate this
Me: that’s it, that’s the plot twist
Balathu: *is still alive*
Salim: *kills him*
Me, who is controlling Salim: oh hey look, I killed your prologue character again!
Em: god damnit
Me: I like all of our characters, but we agree that if it comes down to it, we save Salim and Jason over everyone else?
Em: oh definitely
Em: I like Nick and Rachel, but Salim and Jason are Best Boys
The board in the Star Chamber: *bugged so neither of us can interact with it*
Em: I WANT THE SHINY >:(
Salim: *gets separated from everyone else*
Me: save me!
Em: hmmmmm but should I?
Me: *murdering the shit out of another vampire*
Me: forget Buffy the Vampire Slayer, it’s Salim the Vampire Slayer now!
Me: *saves Jason from getting speared*
Me: you’re welcome!
Em: wait was that a QTE?
Salim: Oorah...? *starts laughing* OORAH!
Us: *dying of love*
Clarice: *returns as a vampire*
Me: curse you, consequence of my own incompetence!
Jason: improvise, adapt and overcome!
Me: just like you said Em!!
Eclipse: *happens*
Us: oh shit, here we go again
Kurum: *dies of a flare in the throat*
Me: guess it really was a cock mouth after all
Em: *dies*
Rachel, Nick and Salim: *all fighting for their lives*
Me: how you doing Em?
Em: I’m not doing anything
Me: what?
Jason: *starts to fight*
Em: oh now I am
Me: WAIT WHAT
Em: guess I would’ve been responsible for Jason and Eric
Me: and instead of giving you Nick or Rachel or Salim to make up for Eric, you just had to look after Jason, got it
Jason: Salim, wait
Us: now kiss!
Jason: *offers a handshake*
Us: goddamn it
Miller: this is just like Winterfold all over again
Us: *both silently googling with no input from one another*
Me: so according to google-
Em: I did the same thing lol
Em: are you going to try and destroy Eric and Rachel’s marriage again next time we play?
Me: yeah but I’ll do my best to keep him alive when I play him
Me: I’ll cut the rope, that’ll really be the nail in the coffin
Us: *reading achievements and sees the Oorah one*
Me: oh man, Eric, Nick and Rachel should’ve been a throuple!
Em: YES
#the dark pictures anthology#house of ashes#salim othman#jason kolchek#nick kay#rachel king#eric king#i should clarify that i don't hate eric at all#i just woke up and chose violence when it came to his marriage#and that became the running joke so far as his and rachel's relationship goes#his death was entirely an accident and if em had just cut the rope he'd have been fine#but yeah we had so much fun it was ridiculous
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I know you’re all waiting for the Achilles post, “when is the Achilles post going to drop” I am asked every moment of this benighted siege during which I speak only of 2004′s Troy
I’ll get to it
here’s the problem with King Priam.
Priam is Hector & Paris’s father, and the king of Troy. In the Iliad, he serves as a vehicle for a straightforward aesop. Priam is a kind man and a good king who honors the gods as he should. He loves his son Hector, who represents Troy’s strength, and overindulges his son Paris, who doesn’t represent anything but he’s a handsome lil scamp, you know?
When Paris brings Helen into Priam’s home, and Priam permits it, he violates the sanctity of Greek hospitality (bc Paris stole Helen from her husband while Paris was his guest). He is then forced to watch Hector (Troy’s strength) be destroyed and desecrated, and his city is ultimately sacked and burned. Priam himself is killed on Zeus’s own altar: because not even the gods will protect a king who fails to uphold the social order.
Moral of the story: don’t let your shitty son violate hospitality. He also gets a really moving scene with Achilles when he goes to reclaim Hector’s body.
This is a functional story, but it doesn’t fuck. “oh, be a responsible steward, don’t let your son kidnap other men’s wives” like whatever. I’m down for changing it up.
Troy’s take on Priam is that he is a doddering fool who is totally down to fight a war because his fuckboy son thinks he’s in love and ~what could be more worthy than a war for love~, who relies on goofy bird-signs from fake-ass “gods” instead of listening to Hector when Hector tells the priest to sit the hell down, man, a soldier with experience should make the decisions.
and that...could work...
like, if you consciously commit to a version of this story in which the gods are fake, which Troy seems to be doing
but Troy is unable to commit to it. It repeatedly shies away from condemning Priam’s devotion to the gods. It simultaneously wants us to respect his convictions, while also showing at every turn that his convictions are wrong. it wants us to find it poignant that he, a faithful man, is murdered in the temple of Zeus, but it also wants us to side against him whenever he listens to his priests.
it wants to have its cake and eat it. It wants both “it is admirable that this man is pious” and “this man’s piety is foolish and misguided” to be true.
it’s the most visible sign of Troy’s dysfunctional relationship with the Greek gods. obviously in the Iliad, they are literally characters who are walking around and doing stuff and talking to the humans. maybe a spicy take, but I think cutting that is fine. it’d be really hard to execute in a way that didn’t come off as silly to modern audiences. there are a few directions you could take it from there: I think the most interesting is to imbue your story with an element of magic realism, or to have symbolic omens throughout the movie that portend the movements of fate. I think removing the gods’ influence from the story entirely kind of raises the question of, like, why are you adapting the Iliad then, there are plenty of other stories where you could just do a swords-and-sandals war movie. but like, okay, you can do that too.
but if you’re telling a version of the Iliad in which the gods just aren’t real - when Priam has no concrete reason to believe that his bird signs mean anything - you are inviting modern audiences to think he’s an idiot for ignoring the advice of his son and greatest general.
and that’s fine!
you can make Priam an idiot!
I don’t even think it undercuts the big scene with Achilles, which even in Troy is almost good! like if he was playing against anyone but Brad Pitt’s execrable and incoherent Achilles, it would have had real pathos! idiots still love their sons!
but if you’re making Priam an idiot, you gotta commit. you can’t have everything that happens in the movie lead me to believe that he’s an idiot, and then ask me to mourn him like he’s a wise and admirable man.
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Hellsing Ch. 70-76
I guess anything I say here is a spoiler, so yeah, this is “Heart of Dreams”, “Relics”, “Heart of Iron”, and the arc “Finest Hour”. Oh, and “Lunatic Dawn”. Gotta lotta ground to cover. Treacherous ground.
Not a whole lot to say about Anderson’s death. He tried to become a monster using one of the Holy Nails from the True Cross, and then Alucard defeated him anyway, once Seras gave him a little help and a reason to go on living. Alucard was pretty upset about Anderson’s demise, but Anderson says a few soothing words, and reminds him that Al only became a vampire because he couldn’t stand being a human, so it doesn’t make a lot of sense for him to cry now.
So yeah, as determined as Anderson was to kill Alucard, he’s a pretty good sport about losing this fight, and he seems to genuinely pity the man. He wonders how long Alucard will go on living with his regrets, and Al replies “Until my expansive future shatters my expansive past.” So, if we want to take that literally, I guess he’s trying to find redemption by being a good guy to make up for his years as a bad guy. Well, he’s been a vampire for 523 years, and a servant of Hellsing for 101 of those years, so I guess maybe he figures if he trucks along for another 321 years that’d balance the scales?
And maybe I’m finally starting to appreciate some of the complexities of Alucard’s character. The Team Four Star Abridged series spent some time on his desire for redemption, but I couldn’t tell if it was based on the original material or something they came up with for their own version. For instance, the Abridged!Alucard rejected the forgiveness offered by God himself, but later Anderson spoke of his desire for redemption and Alucard didn’t dispute that. It seemed contradictory to me at the time, but the manga does seem to support that. As Vlad Tepes, he refused to ask God for anything, preferring instead to fight and drive himself and his followers to the limits of endurance and decency as proof of their faith.
I find that idea heretical, because it suggests that a person can “earn” God’s favor, or God’s forgiveness, or a place in heaven. Arguably, Anderson tried to do the same thing, but I think he was coming more from a place of doing zealous deeds out of gratitude for the Lord’s grace, rather than trying to earn anything he didn’t already have.
The difference with Alucard is that he seemed to be really wrongheaded about his faith, trying to use violence to become a good person. Then it didn’t work, and he became a vampire, devoted entirely to his own selfish desires, and I guess he’s spent the 20th Century realizing that he’s back where he started, trying to fight his way to redemption, only now he has centuries of red in his ledger instead of mere decades.
Oh, anyway, while this is going on, Integra takes a sword and stands it upright so it looks like a cross to mark Anderson’s death. It’s like this quiet sign of respect. I’m not sure whose sword that is, but it looks like the one Alucard was using in his Dracula persona.
Anyway, fuck all that, because Walter finally shows up and stomps the ashes of Anderson just as everyone was having their final farewell with the guy. Rude.
Young Walter just looks kind of stupid to me. Why is he still wearing the monocle? He’s trying to be 14 and 69 at the same time and failing at both.
Seras asks what Millennium did to him, but Walter makes it clear that this isn’t some brainwashing trope. He’s doing this of his own free will.
He also doesn’t consider himself loyal to Millennium. They turned him into a vampire, but he’s doing this for himself, and he’s only cooperating with them because their goals are in alignment.
Yumiko Takagi tries to kill Walter for... Was she mad at him for stomping on Anderson’s remains? I mean, Alucard’s the one who actually killed Anderson, so shouldn’t she be mad at that guy?
It doesn’t matter, because Walt just slices her into pieces with his magic filaments. Now Heinkel Wolfe wants revenge, because she was her long-time partner in assassin stuff. The TFS Abridged series implied that they were lovers, too, which seemed authentic at the time, but I’m not sure there’s any confirmation to be found in the manga itself.
But before she can take the shot, the Captain shows up and shoots Heinkel in the face. Like, through one cheek and out the other, and the only thing saving her from serious injury was that she happened to have her mouth open at the time.
Side note: I caught myself referring to Heinkel as “him”, which frustrates me because I’ve known she was a woman for like five years now. When I first watched the OVA, I was confused, becuase I could tell it was a female voice actor, but maybe that just meant he was really young, like with Schrodinger. But the Hellsing Wiki set me straight, or so I thought. I didn’t think I’d still be making this mistake.
On the other hand, Yumiko sometimes looks a lot like Goemon from Lupin III, so her wearing a nun’s habit isn’t as heteronormative as it might seem. I’m getting off-track.
You’d think this would be leading up to some big double-team on the Hellsing group, now that the Iscariots are out of the picture, but the Captain’s only stopping Heinkel so Walter can have a clear shot at Alucard. That’s the sole reason Walter turned traitor, you see. He wants to fight Alucard and win, and for the last 55 years they’ve been on the same side.
But is that all it is? I never got to read or watch “Hellsing: The Dawn”, the prequel manga Kouta Hirano created after Hellsing. I’ve heard that it never got finished, but also an anime adaptation was released with the home video release of Hellsing Ultimate Episode VIII. All I really know about it was that there was this time where Alucard and Walter were fighting the Nazis, and the Captain showed up, and Alucard ran away because he didn’t think he could beat that dude. Presumably, he left Walter to fend for himself? But all three of them survived until 1999, so I’m not sure what the outcome of that was. I always wondered if Walter held a grudge over that. But maybe I’m reaching.
There’s also a suggestion of professional jealousy. Walter was a rockstar vampire hunter in his youth, but he’s been overshadowed by Alucard, who is--let’s face it-- a living legend. This would be doubly true in the 90′s, when Integra reawakened Alucard, and Walter having to step back even further from the spotlight. The only way for him to reclaim his former glory would be to challenge the greatest of all vampires and win. He’d go down in history as a traitor, but at least he’d be cemented as the absolute best.
Or... or, you can go with the TFS version, where Walter hints at his motives, only for Alucard to take the wind out of his sails and announce “because you wanna fuck me!” And I love that theory more than any other explanation, because it just brings everything together a lot more neatly. I guess you don’t need Walter to have had a crush on Alucard for 55 years, but it’s a lot more compelling than revenge or professional jealousy. Those things have weight, sure, but they work better as distractions, the things Walter might admit to because they hide the deeper reason that he can’t bring himself to say out loud.
And it’s not entirely rejected by the manga. Alucard remarks on how much more beautiful Walter looked in his old age, compared to this treasonous knockoff vampire look he’s sporting now. The last time he spoke this way, it was when he flirted with Queen Elizabeth II. The next time he does it, it’ll be with Sir Integra when she’s in her early 50′s.
Speaking of QE2, she’s safe and sound, because the Secret Service evacuated her to a fortified location in Dover before Millennium attacked. If things get really hairy, they’re prepared to send her to Canada, and if London can’t be secured, they’ll nuke the whole city, though the Queen is certain that Integra and Alucard will win the day. The vampires acting as Millennium agents outside of London are being contained and destroyed, so things seem to be getting under some semblance of control.
However, the Royal Order of Protestant Knights, also known as the “Round Table” is down to just three surviving members. Integra’s in London, but here we have Rob Walsh and Hugh Irons, reflecting on the death of their fellow Round Tabler, Penwood.
This whole scene struck me as a complete non sequitur when I first saw it in the anime. Walter’s betrayal seemed to sudden and poorly explained that it felt like the author was just winging it by this point, and now we have these two dudes struggling to provide some justification for the twist. But reading this manga in 2021, I find that it makes a lot more sense. We’ve already seen tons of Britons in rather lofty positions, all willing to sell out their principles for a chance to become a vampire. Walter is no different from any of them. It’s just more personal when he does it because we actually know the guy.
But as Walsh discusses the utter debacle of this Millennium invasion, he deduces what we’ve just learned back in London. There must have been a traitor in their ranks, because that’s the only way Millennium could have made it this far. I mean, they just flew a bunch of giant blimps full of rockets right into British airspace. That only worked because they had traitors sabotaging the U.K.’s defenses and communications, and Hellsing was especially vulnerable at the same time.
The only thing Walsh can’t figure out is who the traitor was, since it had to be someone at the Round Table, but they’re all dead now, except for Integra, Irons, and himself.
But Irons fills in the missing pieces. It doesn’t have to have been one of the Round Table’s members, but someone close to one of the members. Years ago, Irons warned Walter about Richard Hellsing. Irons knew that when Arthur died, Richard would try to make a play for the Hellsing estate. But when Irons’ fears came to pass, Walter wasn’t there. It’s like he wanted things to play out the way they did.
But why would Walter want events to play out that way? On her own, Integra had no choice but to unseal Alucard to defend herself, and she’s kept Alucard active ever since. And now, lo and behold, Walter reveals that he turned traitor just so he could take on Alucard. It’s like he arranged for all of this to happen years in advance. But how many years? Fifty-five, Irons wonders.
It’s never explicitly confirmed, but Irons’ reasoning makes too much sense to ignore. Earlier, the Major said that he decided back in ‘44 that Walter “Angel of Death” Dornez would have been a good “get” for his side. Now, Irons is suggesting that Walter might have agreed in the same year. So maybe Walter and the Major made a secret agreement even then. It’s possible that they might have done it later, but why not in 1944?
I mean, the whole backstory here is that Millennium is a continuation of a secret Nazi Vampire project that Walter and Alucard destroyed in 1944. Except they didn’t destroy it at all, which sure makes Walter and Al seem very bad at their jobs, unless Walter let them escape and covered it up.
Meanwhile, the Captain tosses a first aid kit to Heinkel, kind of like he’s saying that he doesn’t want to kill Heinkel, but he can’t let her interfere either. We’ll talk about the Captain later.
As for Alucard vs. Walter, Al wants to check with Integra before he goes through with it. He asks for orders, repeating his big speech from when he killed all those cops in Brazil. Yeah, Walter’s a traitor, but he’s been a close mentor and advisor to Integra for all these years. Does she really want Alucard to killerize his ass?
Yes, she does. If Walter stands against them, then he’s the enemy, and Integra has already ordered Alucard to destroy the enemy, no matter who (snif!) they may be. Integra doesn’t relish this command, but she refuses to compromise over sentimental feelings.
Man, fuck you, Walter.
Then the Major lands his airship near the battlefield and invites Integra to come aboard and fight all of his remaining guys. Alucard orders Seras to join her while he deals with Walter. I can appreciate Seras’ concern here, because the last time she watched Alucard fight alone, he took a flaming bayonet to the face. She probably doesn’t care for Integra and Alucard splitting up like this.
Before she goes, she thanks Walter for all of his support, which disarms Walter for just a moment. Man, fuck you, Walter. Seras is so nice and grateful and polite and cool and you just go right ahead with your 55-years-in-the-making Nazi Vampire Jilted Lover scheme. Fuck you, Walter. You don’t deserve to be in Seras’ life.
So the gals go on board the airship and Schrodinger’s there and Integra just shoots him right between the eyes without bothering to slow down. This is maybe my favorite Integra moment in this thing. I sort of wish Kouta Hirano had done a spin-off of Integra and Seras doing cool shit like this for 30 years.
Alucard taunts Walter with the fact that he no longer gets to be a part of Inegra or Seras’ lives anymore. It sounds kind of petty, but when you think about it, it’s a pretty sick burn. Walter may have been planning this for 55 years, but he still had to live that double life, and it’s not like he can just say he was faking it the entire time.
So they fight. Walter’s magic wire powers seem to be amplified, either because of his restored youth or maybe the boost offered by vampire powers, or maybe he’s always been this strong but now he no longer needs to hold back anymore. For instance, he can make mesh screens with his wires to deflect Alucard’s bullets. And when Alucard summons that dog creature he used to dispatch Luke Valentine....
... Walter just bisects it with a flick of the wrist. You really begin to see why he was “The Angel of Death” back in his heyday.
I never understood what this dog familiar was supposed to be. Walter refers to the Hound of the Baskervilles, but as far as I know that’s just a legend confined to the Sherlock Holmes novel of the same name. But apparently that concept was based upon “black dog” folklore of the same region. There’s a whole laundry list of “black dog” apparitions in Britain alone. Black Shuck, Padfoot, Hairy Jack, Bizarro Snoopy, and so on. So I’m not sure if Hirano is saying that Alucard was the source of these legends, or if they were all based on a single creature which Alucard eventually defeated and absorbed into himself.
Al tries to use the Jackal to kill Walter, but that’s kind of stupid, since Walter designed the gun in the first place. In the anime, I thought Walter somehow triggered a bomb he had planted inside it, but maybe he used his wires to make this happen. It doesn’t really matter, because we already saw that the Casull was useless against Walter’s defenses, and not because it had smaller ammunition.
Then Luke Valentine emerges from the black dog’s body. This part never made any sense to me, but I loved how the Major recognized him, but barely. “Oh yeah, it’s that guy from Volume 2! The guy with the brother.”
The doctor suggests that when the dog was killed, this allowed Luke to reassert himself from inside the dog. Something about a “control ratio”, whatever that is. Like, he was absorbed into the dog’s mass, but now that the dog is no longer conscious, he can think for himself again. Notably, only half of Luke actually makes it out . It’s like he’s half-Luke, half dead dog monster.
But before he can do anything else, Walter puts his wires into Luke and starts controlling him like a puppet, mostly so he can use the dog half to attack Alucard.
Alucard seems more impressed than threatened. Keep in mind, Walter was doing pretty damn well against him early on. You’ll notice Alucard’s missing his right arm along with one of his guns. This is better than Anderson managed to do. So why does Walter even need this Luke-dog puppet thing in the first place?
Well, it’s because Walter’s body is giving out on him. Earlier, when the Doctor was performing the procedure to turn Walter into a vampire, he spoke about how rushed the operation was. I mean, he had to finish the whole thing in one night, after all. And Walter’s a lot more powerful than Dandyman, whom the Doctor considered his finest artificial vampire work. So maybe Walter’s just too powerful for this, and he can’t sustain this form. The Luke-dog-thing is just to keep Alucard busy while he coughs up blood.
The Major sees this development, and likens Walter to a high stakes gambler who’s mortgaged everything for a single hand at a high stakes table. Walter’s risked everything just to tangle with Alucard, and it still isn’t enough.
Alucard does manage to finish off the dog-Luke thing, and this sets him up for Walter’s next attack, and then he goes to finish him off, so things seem to be going Walter’s way...
But Alucard used a decoy, disguising Luke’s severed torso as his own, all so he could sucker-punch Walter in the face. As it turns out, Walter’s physical breakdown is making him younger, which amuses Al to no end.
So Alucard follow suits and assumes the form he once used when they fought the Nazis in 1944. Yeah, say hello to “Girlycard”. I’m not sure why Alucard looked like a 14-year-old girl during World War II. I’ve heard this form described as a Japanese 14-year-old girl, and I can’t dispute it, but it also makes Girlycard seem even more random somehow.
I mean, I guess the idea here was for Walter and Alucard to be able to move inconspicuously through enemy territory. No one would suspect a couple of kids until it was too late. I’m imagining a similar scenario to the ones presented in “Cross Fire”. Heinkel and Yumi would play innocent bystanders, then whip out their guns and swords and go ham on the bad guys. Knowing Hirano’s style, maybe Girlycard and Young Walter operated the same way.
And this further supports the Walter-had-an-unrequited-crush-on-Alucard theory. He might have understood that Girlycard was a disguise. On an intellectual level he might have known, but maybe he still carried a torch, and told himself that there was some way that they could be together. Was he just in love with this disguise, or does he love the real thing? Alucard says that he told Walter the truth decades ago, and claims that this is the reason Walter turned traitor, so yeah, it sure feels like Walter couldn’t handle Alucard’s true nature, one way or another.
I mean, let’s assume that this isn’t just about Alucard not being a cute girl. Maybe Walter fell in love with Alucard in all his forms, whatever that means for his sexuality. The bigger issue is that Alucard’s a vampire, and he’s just fundamentally different from Walter, and maybe that was the problem all along. It’s interesting to think about, but the point here would be that there was some kind of problem, and Walter couldn’t let it go.
Meanwhile, Seras and Integra are busy looking like total BMFs. Just HBIC’s. What’s better than this? Two gals bein’ pals.
Hell yeah!
Bad ass!
The vampires on board this airship are happy to meet their doom, and Integra recalls what her father once told her about how vampires want to die on their own terms. Seras doesn’t get it, because if they want to die so badly, they could have just died in the war they were already in fifty-odd years ago.
So the Major gets on the PA system and explains to her that they want more than just a glorious death. They want bigger, better, more perfect battlefield, so as to make their deaths as meaningful as possible. That’s why I don’t understand that airship captain from a while back. Everyone else in Millennium seemed to understand that they weren’t necessarily fighting to win. Britain is prepared to nuke London if they have to, so it’s hard to imagine anyone in Millennium surviving past today, even if they won.
Anyway, as the Major explains all of this, the Captain appears before the gals. It looks like he’s here to stop them, or is he?
#2021hellsingliveblog#hellsing#alucard#seras victoria#walter c dornez#alexander anderson#heinkel wolfe#yumiko takagi#the major#the captain#warrant officer schrodinger#sir hugh irons#lt general rob walsh#luke valentine#really? luke valentine?
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Defending Jon Snow’s Honor
Re: "Jon Snow is Trash": Because if you accept the season eight depiction of Jon Snow as credible, then you might as well admit that Daenerys was mad all along.
Disclaimer: This is not a defense of Jon Snow's actions in season eight, but a refutation of his portrayal.
To begin, we must confront the elephant in the room: In season eight, the character of Daenerys Targaryen was butchered both literally and figuratively. It was such a brutal and heinous maiming of her character that by the end of the series, it was impossible to suspend disbelief and accept the inane and illogical choices of the writers.
But when you then turn around and insist that Jon Snow has always been "trash"—it's no different than the people who insist Daenerys has always been mad. The hit job on Jon Snow was, admittedly, a bit more subtle. But it was a hit job nonetheless. Do not let two talentless writers convince you that Jon Snow, at any point in season eight, acted within the bounds of his established character or even within in-universe show logic.
Because he didn't.
And no, I won't put any of this under a cut. Let the sheer length of this post serve as proof, itself, of just how dirty David Benioff and D.B. Weiss did Jon Snow.
The Real Jon Snow
While the writing on Game of Thrones suffered the further the story strayed from the books and from its original creator, George R.R. Martin, season seven—for all its faults and imperfections—still seemed to follow the natural progression of the story. Everyone still felt more or less in-character, particularly Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen.
So, that's where we'll start. To me, season seven Jon Snow is the rough culmination of exactly where I believe his story arc will lead—and it's a great season to help showcase his qualities.
Regardless of any personal preference for characters, in season seven, Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen are equals. She is a queen and he is a king.
When they meet, she appeals to her power and her claim by inheritance in order to convince Jon to bend the knee. Of course, it was never going to be that easy. Jon's a stubborn man and he has no reason to put his blind faith into well, anyone.
It is only upon revealing her true nature—her selflessness and willingness to use her power to help others—that Daenerys earns not only his respect, but his heart.
To say that "Jon Snow was always trash" is an insult to Daenerys and her judgment.
Dany's love for Khal Drogo was born of adaptation, to make the best of a situation she never asked for. Unlike Jorah Mormont, Jon's devotion to Daenerys had nothing to do with her looks. Unlike Daario Naharis, Jon's devotion to Daenerys had nothing to do with her power or status... and everything to do with who she is fundamentally. Jon Snow pledged to fight for Daenerys based on the content of her character rather than her beauty.
Further, Daario Naharis really stood face to face with Daenerys Targaryen, the Mhysa, and said "fuck the people". Meanwhile, it is Jon Snow's mysterious scars that prove he and Daenerys harbor similar ideologies—demonstrating that Jon is willing to stop at nothing for his people—even if it requires giving his own life.
Many have called Jon Snow "stupid" for exactly this, completely missing the point that there are qualities that deserve to be held in higher esteem than self-preservation or cleverness.
Compassion.
Self-sacrifice.
Humility.
Dignity.
Honesty.
When Jon Snow declares his loyalty to Daenerys in the Dragonpit in front of everyone—this is yet another moment people like to point to as "stupid", yet...
"I'm not going to swear an oath I can't uphold. When enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies."
Jon Snow's integrity is more important to him than lying just to save his own hide. After all, he tried that once before, and the only thing it resulted in was heartache and regret. Jon Snow more or less asserts that a life wherein he must pretend to be something he isn't—isn't a life worth living.
This is as profound a revelation as it is bold.
Whether or not you agree with his convictions... Jon Snow's moral foundation is as unyielding as Valyrian steel. It is no wonder that this was the man who ultimately won the heart of Daenerys Targaryen. A man whose favor cannot be bought or exploited.
One fundamental change in Jon Snow's character from page to screen, however, is his ambition. This emphasis on his reluctance in ruling becomes an unfortunate cornerstone of season eight. But if Jon Snow's book counterpart—the one who dreamt of becoming Lord of Winterfell, of conquering and leading men into glory—lacks this hesitation, and instead, takes leadership so seriously that he only celebrates becoming Lord Commander with one gulp of alcohol... then what impact could his ambition have on the story?
Upon learning that Jon is Rhaegar's son, it's easy to jump to the conclusion that he'll suddenly start vying for the Iron Throne. But if Jon Snow pledges himself to Queen Daenerys in the books, then we have every reason to believe his word is as good as gold. Jon is not a man who takes his oaths lightly. Nor is he a man who is easily manipulated.
Jon Snow deciding to swear fealty to anyone is momentous.
Take, for instance, Stannis Baratheon. Jon's 'father', Ned, pretty much died in support of Stannis' claim to the throne, so he approaches the boy and appeals to Jon's deepest desire—the first thing he can remember wanting—to become a Stark.
All he had to do was say the word, and he would be Jon Stark, and nevermore a Snow. All he had to do was pledge this king his fealty, and Winterfell was his. All he had to do ... was forswear his vows again. And this time it would not be a ruse. To claim his father's castle, he must turn against his father's gods.
This is not an easy decision for Jon Snow. He spends a great deal of time considering the offer from just about every angle one can. Admittedly, it's hard to showcase deep internal reflection on a television show, so we didn't really get to see that process for Jon on screen. But it's always been apparent that two men of privilege—David Benioff and D.B. Weiss—struggle in writing from the perspective of a bastard. Fundamentally, they cannot fully inhabit Jon as a result, because they've never experienced a lifetime of unprovoked contempt, resulting in an unfortunate lack of depth in Jon's translation from page to screen.
Even so, we do get some insight into the depth of Jon's character in season seven when Theon Greyjoy says to Jon:
"You've always known what was right. Even when we were all young and stupid, you always knew. Every step you take, it's always the right step."
In turn, Jon replies:
"It's not. It may seem that way from the outside, but I promise you, it's not true. I've done plenty of things that I regret."
So, by the time that Jon must decide whether or not to accept Stannis Baratheon's offer, he does so with the consideration of future regret. It is in a reflective moment that Jon decides that his greatest desires are not worth the moral expense.
And so, Jon refuses to betray his father's gods, and remains a Snow.
The Kinslaying Problem
Speaking of gods... Way back in his wildling heyday, Ygritte recounts the tale of Bael the Bard to Jon Snow, in which she reveals a curious detail:
"The gods hate kinslayers, even when they kill unknowing."
While you could make the case that this foreshadows Jon as a kinslayer regarding Daenerys... considering it was their kinship that drove a wedge right through their relationship in show canon, it's safe to say season eight Jon knew full well he was kin to Daenerys when he killed her. So what else could this quote mean?
The "kinslayer who kills unknowing" probably won't refer to Daenerys at all—but the mysterious figure known in the books as the Night's King, of whom all records have been destroyed, his very name forbidden.
But... Old Nan insists we do know his name. At least one of them:
"He was a Stark, the brother of the man who brought him down."
Keep in mind that it's Bran she tells, not Jon. And her words even echo the kinslaying element between these mysterious and legendary figures in and around the North.
Interestingly, one of the most prominent kinslayers in the story is the one who, in season eight, ultimately convinces Jon Snow to murder his queen. And somehow, it takes virtually no effort on Tyrion's part to persuade Jon Snow to commit not only regicide, but kinslaying (whatever happened to "The man that passes the sentence should swing the sword"?)
This may mean nothing in the show, but in the books it's reiterated over and over again we're told how accursed such an act is. And we have a pretty good example that it might be true. Rickard Karstark warned Robb Stark prior to his execution by the Young Wolf's hand:
"We are kin, Stark and Karstark. Old gods or new, it makes no matter. No man is so accursed as the kinslayer."
And we all know the fate that befell Robb Stark.
The Incest Problem
Speaking of kin... let's talk incest! While there's no question that on earth, discovering you've been copulating with your aunt might be a cause for surprise... In Westeros? It's not even considered incest. No, not even in the North, where we're given two examples of uncle-to-niece pairings:
"In Westeros incest is only applied if father lays with daughter, mother lays with son, or brother to sister, and the children of such unions are considered abominations. The views regarding marriages between an uncle and a niece (or an aunt to a nephew) might differ between the Faith and the old gods. In the north, Serena Stark had been wed to her half-uncle, Edric, while her sister Sansa Stark had been wed to her half-uncle Jonnel Stark."
In the original draft of the story, Jon was supposed to have a romantic relationship with Arya Stark—his cousin by blood, but who, for all he knows, is his sister. Seeds of this are still scattered in early chapters of ASOIAF, as illustrated by the sheer tenderness of their relationship in A Game of Thrones.
For years, Arya Stark was the only woman who treated Jon with respect. It's no wonder that his feelings for her have always bordered on romantic (and let me make a clear distinction here—I said romantic, not sexual).
Considering that it was George's original plan, it's pretty safe to guess that being a willing participant in an incestuous relationship is not necessarily out of character for Jon Snow, as was predetermined by the man who created him.
Jon Snow is a polarizing character for people who love Targaryens and hate Starks—and vice versa. Whether or not you like it, Jon Snow is a Targaryen. And thus, the Doctrine of Exceptionalism applies to him, which states:
"The Targaryens wed brother to sister as the Valyrians had always done, and as the gods had made them this way, it was not for men to judge."
While the show canon did next to nothing with Jon Snow's true Targaryen lineage—never forget that the entire reason David Benioff and D.B. Weiss were given the rights to Game of Thrones was that they could correctly answer the question "Who is Jon Snow's mother?"
An incestuous scandal was the best that the lackluster show writers could come up with. And to then accept that the only reason George R.R. Martin penned this central plot twist in his medieval fantasy story exclusively to create some modern-era incest drama is, frankly, insulting.
David Benioff and D.B. Weiss are creatively barren. As barren as... um, Daenerys apparently?
To further exploit the show's lack of logical reasoning—it turns out that, yes, according to show canon, Daenerys was barren the whole time. While Jon doubted the validity of Mirri Maz Duur's claims... he was wrong. And Daenerys was straightforward with him that their union would produce no offspring. And apparently, despite all the wasted dialogue used to foreshadow, she was right.
This means that even within the boundaries of the show's broken logic, the anti-incest angle never held water.
So... if season eight Jon Snow's rejection of Daenerys is what ultimately causes her to "snap", yet it's unlikely that book Jon Snow will feel the same strong aversion about their relation... will she "snap" at all?
The Execution Problem
When it comes to the 'old way', Ned Stark has taught his sons well, Jon Snow among them:
"We hold to the belief that the man who passes the sentence should swing the sword. If you would take a man's life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot bear to do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die."
When Jon encounters Ygritte, he can't bring himself to kill her despite the command to. She reminds him of his sister, Arya—the girl he loves the most in all the world. And so, he asks Ygritte to yield. Jon Snow, simply reminded of a girl he loves, cannot bring himself to kill Ygritte.
Later, we directly witness Jon applying Ned's logic to his execution of Janos Slynt. After advising Janos on how best to achieve a quick death, he says:
"If you have any last words, now is the time to speak them."
"Please, my lord. Mercy. I'll … I'll go, I will, I …"
No, thought Jon. You closed that door. Longclaw descended.
Like his father before him, Jon advised Janos to speak his last words. And upon hearing them, deemed him fit to die.
This is Jon Snow's execution style.
We see it repeated even in season six when he executes his murderers:
"If you have any last words, now is the time."
Patiently, he waits for each of his four murderers to speak before letting them hang.
This is Jon Snow's execution style.
Alternatively, we see another style of execution when it comes to Jon Snow's own murder, as carried out by Alliser Thorne. Let's just go ahead and refer to this style as dishonorable and cowardly (two qualities that we've now established that Jon Snow does not possess).
Jon Snow was led, unarmed, into a false sense of security—where he was then cornered and stabbed in the heart by his enemies, left lying in a pool of his own blood.
The change in Jon Snow's execution style to suddenly emulate the way in which he was murdered is a cold-blooded betrayal of Jon's character.
But back to Janos.
On the surface, Jon Snow made a snap decision to execute Janos Slynt for disobeying a command—though if we're being honest, it was more-so because Janos was an entitled and sniveling Lannister loyalist that couldn't be trusted, or, a clever political move to ensure Jon’s future safety as Lord Commander.
Jon then severed the man's head as he cried and begged for his life.
You expect us to believe that this man...
...would be bothered by the execution of attempted murderer and traitor, Varys? A man who openly suggested they collude and commit treason?
While the above gif looks a little more like the Jon Snow we know, it’s not. Especially considering the writers tried their hardest to make us believe Jon Snow is incapable of dishonesty and lying, even by omission, he neglects to tell Daenerys of Varys’ treasonous ways. He cannot lie to his siblings or to Daenerys about his Targaryen identity, yet he can omit a very troubling piece of information regarding one of the allies of the woman he loves and is pledged to. What?
Further, compare the execution below with the above gifs of Jon Snow's two executions. He even shows more satisfaction in the deaths of the lives he’s taken than Daenerys did. Varys surviving means Dany’s life will forever be at risk. Not only is Varys an oathbreaker, but he attempted regicide by poison. Having Jon Snow judge Daenerys for this action is a blatant double standard that makes zero logical sense.
And speaking of attempted murderers... Let's discuss Randyll Tarly.
Randyll Tarly is no stranger to Jon Snow. Sam told him all about his father way back in episode four of season one:
"You're almost a man now, but you're not worthy of my land and title. Tomorrow, you're going to take the black, forsake all claim to your inheritance and start north. If you do not, then we'll have a hunt, and somewhere in these woods your horse will stumble, and you'll be thrown from your saddle to die. Or so I'll tell your mother. Nothing would please me more."
So, you're going to tell me that Jon Snow is suddenly perturbed by the execution of a man who both threatened to murder his own son and who betrayed his liege lord?
To fight alongside the Lannisters, no less?
According to the books, this is what Jon Snow thinks of the Lannisters:
"It's death and destruction I want to bring down upon House Lannister, not scorn."
And in case you missed it, this is how Jon Snow punishes those who betray their liege lords:
Maybe you’re itching to argue that it’s Dany’s execution style that is the problem. That perhaps, 'death by fire is heinous and cruel! Beheading and hanging and punching someone to death are all "merciful" deaths!' Because, stupefyingly, that's a popular argument for those that (also stupefyingly) defend Randyll Tarly.
That argument might work if not for the fact that Jon instructed his men to launch flaming arrows at the Battle of Castle Black, thus using fire as a means to kill.
The Arya Stark Problem
We've already discussed Arya Stark a little bit in terms of her deep bond with Jon Snow... but in order to truly show how out-of-character their reunion was, we need to backtrack a little bit.
Upon gifting her Needle, Jon and Arya have this exchange in the books:
"And whatever you do..."
Arya knew what was coming next. They said it together.
"...don't ... tell ... Sansa!"
Not only do the pair have an understanding which excludes their sister or trusting her with sensitive information... when Arya is caught with Needle later on, this happens:
Arya chewed her lip and said nothing. She would not betray Jon, not even to their father.
And when Arya attempts to shed her identity at the House of Black and White, she can't bring herself to part with Needle, because:
Needle was Jon Snow's smile. The Many-Faced God can have the rest, she thought, but he can't have this.
Arya Stark refuses to part with the physical representation of Jon Snow's smile.
For the most anticipated reunion in the entire show, it fell flat. Don't get me wrong, it was exhilarating to see Jon Snow and Arya Stark embracing after being apart for a decade—and Kit Harington and Maisie Williams did their absolute best with the poor dialogue they were given.
But this was not the reunion of two characters who survived some of their toughest challenges by merely recalling the memory of the other. Jon and Arya shared a bond that nothing could tarnish—not even time. A bond that no one—not even their fellow family members—could penetrate.
The nerve of the writers making Arya Stark, one of the cleverest characters in the books despite her age, say that Sansa Stark is the smartest person she's ever met? No. For one, Arya Stark did not need to live as a bastard in order to empathize with them—which means that even as a little girl, she possessed wisdom that is years ahead of her elder sister's.
Much like Jon Snow, Arya Stark is not a character who is easily persuaded by the opinions of others. Which is why she and Jon are close at all—she never once believes the stigma attached to his bastardy, because it's so blatantly obvious to her that his character simply doesn't fit the rhetoric.
I'd be willing to bet that Jon's incredibly loyal sister would trust his judgment in pledging himself to Daenerys. And I won't for a minute believe that the girl who said to Gendry...
"I can be your family."
...would suddenly regress into intolerance, particularly not at someone else's behest.
I won't believe for a minute that the girl who said...
"The woman is important too!"
...would turn around and suggest that the woman who provided her armies, dragons, and resources to save the North should then be discarded afterward.
I won't believe for a minute that the girl who makes allies and friends everywhere she goes would turn around and argue that allies aren't important.
I won't believe for a minute that the girl who named her direwolf after the warrior queen Nymeria, the girl who said...
"He killed the slave?" That did not sound right. "He should have killed the masters!"
...wouldn't at least give the person she loves the most in all the world, Jon Snow, a few minutes to explain why he supports and believes in Daenerys.
Lastly, there is absolutely no reason to believe that Arya Stark would ever betray Jon Snow. It is an insult to one of the purest and tenderest relationships in the entire series to suggest otherwise.
The Winterfell Problem
Even on Jon Snow's AWOIAF Wiki page, he is described as "quick to sense a slight", as well as observant, "a trait he developed on account of being a bastard".
Yet, during the feast following the Night King's death... Jon Snow is suddenly portrayed as oblivious all in service to the plot to alienate Daenerys. Jon Snow's sudden disinterest in the woman he spent season seven so intently studying was both frustrating and compromising to his character traits.
After all, the most impressive leader Jon Snow has ever witnessed followed him into his homeland to save his men for nothing to gain (and in fact, to sacrifice her own men and resources), not just for the man she loves—but because it's the right thing to do.
The writers really expect us to believe that this man, who turned Janos Slynt's insubordination into an example of what happens to men who openly disrespect him and his orders...
...is going to suddenly sit idly by while his own people make a fool of him by disrespecting his chosen queen, and by extension, him.
Don't let the writers believe for an instant that he would stand for it.
Taking a step further back, what in seven hells was going on during that battle?
The betrayal to Jon Snow's character is the most glaring during episode three of season eight, in which the writers really decided to sideline the most talented and quick-thinking swordsman in their cast (next to Furdik—who, by the way, was also sidelined).
Jon Snow conveniently forgets virtually everything he learned from defending the Wall in season four and reclaiming Winterfell in season six. The King in the North who travels all the way to Dragonstone for not only dragonglass, but in hopes of gaining the help of the queen and her armies is really going to let one of those armies gallop head-first into the army of the undead with metal weapons? Jon Snow is the first character in the show to learn that regular weapons don't work against wights!
And while it may not be Jon Snow's fault that the trebuchets managed to make it to the front line of all places, he certainly would've pointed out the flaw in that decision. As well as the placement of the trenches—which physically severed the troops from the safety of the castle upon retreat. Retreat, if necessary, would be a priority for Jon Snow especially, as he, above everyone else, knows that every fallen man means one more undead soldier they must deal with.
And speaking of the trenches...
To add insult to injury, the writers really decided to add a shot of Jon Snow sitting idly next to the trenches on top of Rhaegal, a dragon that he was just using to light the dead on fire, as Melisandre struggled to light them with magic:
What? You mean this Jon Snow?
The Jon Snow that once used his quick-thinking to discover that fire kills wights... doesn't think to use dragonfire to light a trench on fire? Come on.
And since when has Jon Snow ever balked during battle? Of all the characters, he's one of the few who actually understands what the Night King is, how big his army is, what the odds are, and what it's like to be in the midst of not only battles—but ones that are going really poorly.
Yet at Winterfell—the place he fought so hard to reclaim and that he reluctantly went south to rally support for in order to protect it—he suddenly has no idea what to do? He's historically one of the most quick-witted and innovative fighters in the entire show, if not the most.
And speaking of battles...
"We find our true friends on the battlefield"
Whether or not you agree with the writers' choice to have Sam attempt to persuade Jon to commit treason against his queen... I just cannot accept that Jon Snow willingly turns away from his oldest friend in a moment like this:
Even in the most hopeless of situations, Jon Snow won't hesitate to save someone he loves. Like when he tried, against all odds, to save Rickon.
Even with complete strangers, Jon Snow has shown his gallantry.
As well as his aptitude for forgiveness.
Whether or not Samwell Tarly offended Jon, he would never leave him to die. Their principals may no longer converge the way they once did... but never forget that when, in the books, Chett suggests Thorne should kill Sam for being weak, Jon speaks up on Sam's behalf:
"Lords are gold and knights steel, but two links can't make a chain. You also need silver and iron and lead, tin and copper and bronze and all the rest, and those are farmers and smiths and merchants and the like. A chain needs all sorts of metals, and a land needs all sorts of people. You can't hammer tin into iron, no matter how hard you beat it, but that doesn't mean tin is useless."
The Night King Problem
Speaking of the battle for Winterfell... By denying Jon Snow the climax to his story arc—squaring off with the Night King—and instead, granting that honor to Arya Stark (who has no relation to anything happening north of the Wall in either book or show...) it disrupts the natural conclusions for both characters.
Jon Snow and the Night King had unfinished business—at least, that's what all those long and intense stare-downs seemed to indicate. Even in the books, the only POV chapters that mention the Night's King are Jon, Bran, and Sam.
Kit Harington was very gracious when trying to explain why he would've liked to get the killing blow:
"I was a bit pissed off, only because I wanted to kill the Night King! I think I felt like everyone else did, in that it had been set up for a long time, and then I didn't get to do it."
But even in all his graciousness, Kit points out that it's been set up for a long time. And you know what George R.R. Martin has to say about changing your plan mid-stream:
"If you planned your book that the butler did it and then you read on the internet that someone has figured out that the butler did it and then you suddenly change in mid-stream and it was the chambermaid who did it? Then you screw up the whole book because you've got this foreshadowing early on and you've got these little clues you've planted and now they're dead ends... and you have to introduce other clues and you're retconning. It's a mess."
Yet... The fact that Jon Snow vs. the Night King made sense was exactly why the writers chose not to do it!
"We hope to kind of avoid the expected and Jon Snow has always been the hero, the one who's been the savior. But it just didn't seem right to us for this moment."
Sure, Arya Stark killing the Night King "subverted expectations" (I'm so sick of typing those two words together at this point, but it's impossible not to do when trying to discuss season eight)... but at what cost? The cost of any emotional impact.
Just like virtually everything else in the last season.
(As an aside, if the writers really felt Arya Stark was the right person to land the killing blow, they should've had Jon lose the swordfight and before the Night King is able to finish him, his ride-or-die sister comes flying out of the darkness to save his life. The audience gets what they were promised and Arya still gets to be the hero in a way that not only makes sense, but fits her character…)
Of course, the showdown with the Night King was not the first major plot point that was teased over the course of the series to be ultimately robbed from Jon Snow.
Nor would it be the last...
The Prophecy Problem
To claim that Jon piercing Dany's heart with a quick sneak attack has any resemblance to the legend of Azor Ahai is a gross oversimplification. Let's take a look at what the legend actually says:
"He summoned his wife. 'Nissa Nissa,' he said to her, for that was her name, 'bare your breast, and know that I love you best of all that is in this world.' She did this thing, why I cannot say, and Azor Ahai thrust the smoking sword through her living heart. It is said that her cry of anguish and ecstasy left a crack across the face of the moon, but her blood and her soul and her strength and her courage all went into the steel."
Yes. Daenerys was stabbed in the heart. That is the only similarity her season eight murder bears to the above legend.
Where was the declaration of love? Where was the permission asked? Where was the consent given? There was no cry of anguish and ecstasy—there was a gasp and a gurgle. Dany's life was not given in exchange for anything, it was simply taken. There was no transference of courage or strength—just a quick and (troublingly) unimpactful "shock" death.
Of course, it's important to point out that Azor Ahai is never even mentioned in the show. And while The Prince that was Promised was mentioned (as late as season seven)... So far as show canon goes, this prophecy meant absolutely nothing in the end.
That makes two of us, Kit.
Jon Snow (and Kit Harington) Also Deserved Better
Aside from George R.R. Martin, the man who knows Jon Snow best, Kit Harington, was overcome with heartache, disbelief...
...and frustration upon reading the treacherous turn his character took in the season eight script.
David Benioff and D.B. Weiss completely neutered Jon Snow's character.
Figuratively and well, maybe literally? Year after year, they have shown themselves to be petty and spiteful with various cast and crew—from Kit Harington to Ian McElhinney to Alexander Siddig to George R.R. Martin, himself.
Remember that stupid dig at Jon Snow's penis size upon his resurrection? Just a dumb joke, right?
Or was it?
It was sure important enough for them to go on record with major publications and clarify that, no, it wasn't just a joke, but canon! Pay very close attention to how it's worded:
"He just had the look. The brooding intensity; the physical grace; the chip-on-the-shoulder quality that we always associate with extraordinarily short people.
There has to be some downside to being Kit Harington, right? It's impossible not to like him. Maddening. The one thing we can do is saddle his character with a tiny pecker."
This isn't about Jon Snow's penis. It's about taking Kit Harington down a peg. Not only did they give Jon Snow a canonically "small penis", they had to give Daenerys lines about how he's "too little for her", to poke fun at Kit's height. You know, because he's apparently "extraordinarily short".
Utterly juvenile.
Much like with Tyrion Lannister, Jon Snow's cleverness far exceeded that of the men who were in charge of writing him—and they failed to replicate it. And so, the further Jon Snow strayed from his creator, George R.R. Martin, the further his IQ dropped until, by season eight, he was reduced to a bumbling idiot shouting at dragons and saying little more than "muh queen". Why? Because if you're actually an idiot, you cannot write a clever person.
As for the books, Jon Snow's true fate remains to be seen. And for as much as I don't want to get my hopes up for a better ending, I cannot ignore that Jon Snow's foreshadowing just doesn't point to futility, and that if it does—George R.R. Martin sure put in a lot of work to convince us otherwise.
As the man, himself, recently said:
"People know an ending—but not the ending."
It is as much an insult to Jon Snow to have Daenerys descend into spontaneous madness as it was for the fans who loved her. Over the years, Jon has proven himself to be a great judge of character—and this was the man who assured Daenerys, in her most vulnerable moment, that she does deserve to be the queen of the Seven Kingdoms.
After all, there’s just no denying their similarities as characters:
"From the very beginning, Jon and Daenerys' stories have paralleled and contrasted each other, with both starting from a position of weakness and insubordination before ascending into leadership roles. Both had to maneuver their way through the difficulties of power while maintaining their sense of justice, and in doing so, had to face many hard decisions along the way. Both were mocked, attacked, and betrayed for doing the right thing. Both reached their low points and were figuratively reborn at the same time, both coming out stronger as a result."
-Brandon Jacobs
If you loved Jon Snow prior to season eight, you were never wrong or misled, nor was your judgment unsound. I hope that, somewhere in this post, there was at least one example that reminded you of why Jon Snow was able to win your heart in the first place. Writers who don't understand the most fundamental qualities of a character should not be given the power to rob you of your love for them.
I am willing to bet that like me, and like all of Jon Snow's fans... you know him better than the two men who were granted the honor of writing his television canon. An honor they proved in season eight that they never deserved.
Please do not grant these two incompetent writers and poor storytellers the power to turn you against one character while praising the other, especially when both were ruined beyond repair or recognition.
Forgiving Jon Snow as a character ≠ condoning what he did in season eight, just as forgiving Daenerys Targaryen ≠ condoning mass genocide.
Like Daenerys, Jon Snow deserved better.
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ok so i finally watched those last three episodes. i said buckle up it’s time to suffer and by the saints did i ever suffer. i just knew the darklina scenes were gonna be rough to watch. it was already rough reading the scenes as they were written in book one. i mean the darkling just shines with his intelligence in that chapter, doesn’t he? threaten the man she loves? well the other man she loves? check! tell her she betrayed you when the reality is you’ve been telling half truths all along and didn’t trust her to make her choices? check!
buddy this isn’t how you apologize. in the show itself it’s pretty much the same back and forth that leads nowhere. you lied to me! you ran off because my mother told you i’m not who i say i am without giving me a chance to explain! you’ve been lying or bending the truth since we met! YOU TURNED YOUR BACK ON YOUR COUNTRY!
by that point i was just like chill the fuck out man you’re about to decimate many many countrymen and you know it. i loved that the stop they made was all about him getting revenge on the man who attempted on alina’s life, that was very unhinged of him and i was HERE for that shit but everyone else in that port? every other woman and child and man on that port? not all of them played a hand and he just went ahead and had them slaughtered without batting an eye. and it’s not like he has some kind of safeguard for grishas does he? how does he know there’s no grisha wherever he’s expanding the fold? some could be in hiding because they fled, because they didn’t want to serve the king. oh well he doesn’t really care about those people does he? we all saw how he spoke about those deserters to arken.
also he could NOT handle alina’s harsh truths about how his own actions are harming grisha close to him even though he claims that every choice he’s made was to protect them and empower them. when she brought up genya i was like yes you better look down you motherfucker! you did this to her, you delivered to her abuser over and over.
we saw his backstory, some of it and he acted out of grief and rage. he toyed with magic he did not understand and of course he didn’t intend this but his reaction to the fold once it was all said and done was definitely foreshadowing what he was to become. i created something he said defiantly. you created something you don’t have control over. and now he’s done it again somehow, he’s got brand new creatures following him at the end.
i actually felt for young aleksander for losing the woman he loved but the arrogance and the recklessness he showed there is still the same arrogance he has now. he thinks he has thought his plan through but that’s just working off the assumption that no one opposes him ever otherwise he went ahead and put a target on grisha’s backs. he definitely put a target on alina’s back although i know that was never the plan. the fact that when he has a perfectly good remedy to the fold, a chance to actually fix his mistakes once and for all he turns its back and decides to make it ten times worse, chooses ruling via fear over hope is jusr a sign of how far he’s gone. and he didn’t waver once not even when alina was pleading with him that he could have made her his equal, that they could have stayed together and made ravka safe together if only he gave her a choice, he was still manipulative and lied to her face.
at this point i just don’t think his love for her outweighs his belief that he knows what’s best for ravka, what’s the best way to protect grisha. because he doesn’t care about anyone who isn’t grisha at all. he was persecuted like so many others. he won a war for a king centuries and that king turned on him. i’m sure he’s looking at the current one knowing that once grisha have exhausted their uses that king will turn on him too. the fold is just a different kind of war and if he wins that one for the king the darkling already knows what the outcome will be.
so to summarize this whole darkling commentary here i understand where he is coming from, i understand the fear and the rage and the desperation. it’s not working out for him though. he’s feared but he’s alone. for every ivan there’s a zoya. for every man who’s blindly loyal to him there’ll be someone rising up to oppose him eventually. and if it’s not his own people it’ll be non grisha folks. he has the second army working for him still, but he is alone. and that’s no one’s fault but his own because alina was willing to work with him.
speaking of alina i loved every second of her rising up to oppose him telling him she never needed him. she may have fallen in love with him but she never actually needed him to be powerful, she only needed to free herself of the restraints she’d put on her powers out of fear. i also thought that the way she freed herself of his control made more sense than it did in the books.
i have hope for darklina still despite all that’s happened despite how positively full of rage ans resentment she is because she still loves him, she still listened when he pleaded with her that they needed each other if they wanted to deal with the fold. of course there’s the slight issue of him lying directly and manipulating her to do his bidding and of course the fact that he took her power from her. the only thing that was her and he perverted it for his own gain. i think it just might take more than a year for her to forgive him i’m afraid. i don’t necessarily see a path to redemption right now but reconciliation? alina can be merciful, she can be forgiving. i think all it would really take is just one selfless act, one show of good faith. if he keeps pursuing her and mal and keep trying to rob her of her agency however i don’t see them ever having any kind of closure.
i don’t think i need to expand much more on my thoughts on malina. i’m not feeling what the show wants me to feel. i’m not seeing them as these soulmates that belong together. to me they’d be better of as best friends. the darkling didn’t make her strong he tried to steal her strength for his own use but mal doesn’t make her strong either, she relies too much on him. mal actually was pretty damn resourceful when left on his own. i unfortunately couldn’t say the same for alina. co-dependant love is not better than toxic love and darklina’s toxicity (most of it) comes from the lies and from the darkling repeatedly choosing for alina. he’s not brave enough to just tell her what he intends to do and let her decide whether to align herself with him so he lies and he deceives instead. not much he can do to undo it now but he could help actually destroy the fold if he wanted to. i don’t know if he’ll ever come around to it though.
the darkling visiting mal with the sole purpose to rub it in his face that alina and he are immortal and so eventually mal will die and then he could just swoop in was just peak comedy. the way he delivered that line too you’d think he was talking to an insect not another human being. it was brilliant. mal echoing that same line but ending it with “the past will do it for me” was pretty good, nice quip i’ll give mal that but also terribly ironic when you see the ending.
team crows remains the highlight for me. kaz and inej and their unspoken love for each other is just killing me. i can tell there are personal traumas there that i don’t know about (gotta read those damn books and quick) what with kaz not being able to help tend to her wounds and the fact that there were moments were i could see there was maybe a kiss about to happen or an embrace (at the end when kaz let alina go free and made a deal not to rat her out) and it just didn’t happen. there’s a story there about kaz and his distaste for being touched/touching others. jesper is just here to look pretty, shoot shit and be the most charming person in any crowd. i’m in love. also someone give him his goat back for the love of god.
nina and mathias were entertaining for sure. with all that banter and all these jabs i should have really seen them falling for one another coming. i felt like it was perhaps a bit rushed but i guess there’s nothing like almost freezing to death together to make you reconsider your views. you know the whole saving of lives thing can really bond you. the waffle date was adorable. was not expecting nina to just brand herself a traitor for him and she’s damn lucky fyedor came on that mission because i’m pretty sure ivan wouldn’t even have offered to keep her name out of the report. she and mathias ended their story both heartbroken and separated. i really hate that he thinks this was all intentional. really hope she’ll join the crows on their next con job. and i also cannot wait to see the look on heleen’s face when kaz buys inej’s freedom.
i was not at all expecting zoya to turn against the darkling. that’s what happens when you turned down one of your fuck buddies, aleksander they get bitter and then they leave you to be eaten alive by volcras. ok but in all seriousness she did the right thing and i hope she finds her family even if they’re not alive so she can say her goodbyes.
oh and completely unrelated but since i talked about heights of comedy before i really need more sassy! darkling in my life. he is everything. that quip about his speech. the way he said adorable like he was gagging on the word. him just letting david be his dorkiest self and raise his hand before speaking, that little put upon sigh. i love sassy! darkling almost as much as jealous and petty darkling which is saying a lot. just more of that. it humanizes him, i’m tired of villains who are forever stoic and stone face.
i think i about covered everyone and everything that happened in those remaining episodes. all in all shadow and bone is an amazing adaptation, really faithful to the first book. they made some changes to the characters which in turn changed some dynamics (alina actually admitted she wanted to be with the darkling. out loud. to his face. book!alina would never and book!darkling would never cry in front of her.) but it made for surprising viewing. it also made me become even more attached to some characters (the darkling let’s be real) which made me care more which is why i was livid when they started making a lot of terrible no good choices.
i was just really blown away by this show and the way the grishaverse was brought to life and above all major props to the actors who all just seemed to be born to play their respective roles.
#shadow and bone spoilers#sab spoilers#darklina#alina starkov#aleksander morozova#inej ghafa#nina zenik#mathias helvar#jesper fahey#kaz brekker#zoya nazyalensky
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I forgot to watch content all week so i wrote about games ive been playing
9/2/2021: The Truman Show
You should fear your fears but embrace them and use them to guide you into the unknown, to explore and experience what life has to offer. Fear stands between you and the fullest experience of life so you must pass through it to better yourself. Heed not the walls built about you and the chains made to hold you. Though the architects insist it will preserve your life, containment is anathema to life. Do not take in faith the benevolence of powers that be; instead trust those who would support and liberate you, guide you through fear and into life.
As best I can lay it out, I think this is the philosophy of the Truman show but there is so much more to read into it also. There is critique of systems of commodification and celebrity (i.e. capitalism) reducing human beings to a consumable good as well as encouragement to find and pursue your goals despite adversity and even sensibility which is also tied to the illusion of economic responsibility. You can’t put a camera inside a human head, you can never “know” them without being an active and intrinsic part of their life, but also there is need for reciprocation. If one half exists with ulterior motive then the entire relationship is rotten; sincere humanity is what creates real connections. Without such your world is fake. A world built around one person is a world where no one can truly live. All these actors have given up basically their entire lives for the sake of watching Truman have his life built around him by outside forces, have allowed themselves to be commodified and dehumanised for the good of one man, Christoph. The man at the top has delusions of grandeur and thinks only of his own bottom line, he cares not for his subjects but simply wants them to do as he tells them because it benefits him to commodify their lives and interactions. Even then he cannot stand to lose control and in seeking to demonstrate Truman’s “realness” he structures his life so thoroughly that eventually there’s no reality left, only a script and adverts. But the people watching still empathise with Truman because everyone in the working class understands what it is to be trapped because real life is our own Truman show and one day we must all pass through fear, step out of the dome and create a real life for ourselves outside of the system of commodification which consumes everyone’s life and removes all realness and sincerity and emotional catharsis from it.
I unreservedly love this film.
14/2/2021: Assorted Game Reviews
Horizon Zero Dawn (Unfinished due to technical issues, 45 hours inc. parts of Frozen Wilds):
This game is really cool and really fun. I think it is defined by its incredible setting which somehow creates a fresh feeling post-apocalyptic environment. Said environment creates intriguing alt-future lore and some very interesting environments to explore. I love the machine designs (especially tallnecks!) and was very sad to hear one of their contributing artists passed away recently but I’m glad their work lives on in this visually stunning game. I’m a sucker for Ubisoft-style open world games simply because it tickles a certain kind of itch and somehow this non-Ubisoft game has outdone Ubisoft on their own formula, which is hilarious, but also good for me as running around this world exploring and clearing map markers is engaging fun. Not least because of the combat. I have a minor criticism here that the combat feels slightly awkward on mouse and keyboard, the arrows never seem to go where I’m aiming, but aside from that the experience of fighting is a grand one. Enemies never lose their threat and I love the weak spot system the game employs which makes every tool useful in niche circumstance and rewards curiosity. It specifically manages this in a way that I feel the Witcher series could learn from if it ever returns; by making head on assault less viable and encouraging tactical hunting. I do feel this system makes hunting robots so fun that by contrast hunting humans becomes a chore however, though I noted this improves in the dlc with the addition of humans with elemental weaknesses limited in number as they are. I cannot speak for the story in entirety but what I encountered was pretty good, though I feel as if it was only just really getting going at the point where I could not continue. I find Aloy to be a compelling and well portrayed protagonist and though I can guess about her origin and the ultimate end of the alt-future apocalypse I still want to see how it plays out on screen, so will return to this as soon as I’ve fixed it.
Rimworld (122 hours. Familiar with but do not own Royalty Expansion):
Rimworld is one of those super special games that I don’t think I have a single problem with. Fair warning it can be brutal and is heavily dependent on RNG but this allows it to create truly unique and interesting scenarios on a constant basis. In the wider perspective it could be described as formulaic, with regular cycles of managing the settlement between raids and random events, but the devils in the details. Colonist traits, health and skills dictate how you play and sometimes you’ll be forced to adapt as some colonists simply refuse to perform some tasks. The depth of health particularly amuses me, in that each little part of someone’s body is modelled in a way. If you’re in a firefight you may take a single bullet which grazes your finger and you’re fine. Alternately it could pierce your human leather cowboy hat, your skull and kill you instantly and the game will tell you exactly what happened. The risk/reward element is addictive enough, and that’s without accounting for just how cool it is to see your colony slowly expand. Establishing more and more options for crafting is fun and shows off the full range of different items in the game which is fucking extensive. Between clothing, weapons, armour, sculpture and drugs to name only a few you have the opportunity to create many varied production lines either for your colonists or to trade for money and there is a lot of fun to be had here as well as it is quite satisfying to see psychoid you have grown personally become the cocaine your colonists snort to help them stay awake on limited sleep. From an archaeologist’s perspective it is especially cool to look back over your base and see the hints of how and why structures were built and remember the history of your limitations and development through structure. I think the lore of the universe is really cool too, a very 40k-esque kind of place except with far less order, somehow. But the universe does an excellent job of feeling alive and moving constantly on both a planetary and interstellar level. You can fully believe that while you build wooden shacks to shield yourself from terrifyingly low temperatures there are simultaneously rich pieces of shit living it up on the glitterworld that’s one system over. The music does an excellent job of creating the wild west frontier atmosphere the game cultivates to great effect. Ultimately, for just being a grid with a series of different numbers attached, this game does a fantastic job of creating a compelling, brutal and very real colony management experience. I dont think I can properly put into words the grandness and scope of this one. I didnt even mention the modding scene, which is expansive and tailors to basically any need you could have. The Rim is a terrifying place but theres so much fun to be had.
Factorio (86 hours, mostly 1.1):
Having completed a game of Factorio I can tell you reliably that this is one of the best games ever made, thoroughly addictive and fun. If you like numbers, logistics, TRAINS, its gonna be your thing. Not to mention its probably the only documented case of a game with no bugs (so far as official forums are concerned). Strictly speaking this games combat is not the most engrossing thing but good lord do you feel it when you acquire a flamethrower. The way each aspect of the game (production, research, logistics, combat, upgrades for everything therein) feeds into the next is a really well constructed balancing act such that you must experience the full game in order to complete it and I always appreciate this kind of design. I think its one of the best tenets of factory game design especially as its something present in Satisfactory too. Beyond all of this generalised good the game is also excellent in its intricacies, the architecture necessary to build a maximum efficiency base, the level of planning and organisation that can be employed is mind-blowing. Not to mention the mod community, factorion is already an extensive experience and some mad bastards have seen fit to complicate it further, hats off to them. This really is a great moment in gaming.
Destiny 2 (198 hours, all expansions, played some post Forsaken release, mostly Season of Arrivals onwards, spent roughly £20 on microtransactions):
This is a very interesting and enjoyable experience, but I must say it can be a bit controversial at times. What its does particularly well is moment to moment gameplay and design in all aspects. The game is stunning; between environments, cosmetics, shaders ships and ghosts there’s a vast range of incredible things to see, all rooted in the “pseudo-magi-science” aesthetic it’s got going on. The class design is excellent and you really do feel like you embody this rampaging madman / agile gunman / space wizard archetype, whichever you choose to play. The abilities, especially supers, are very satisfying. Everything has heft and power behind it which can be felt in all aspects of design; sound and animation is top notch. Movement is cool, you can feel how fast you move both on foot and in vehicles and the navigation has a little fun subtlety depending on your class jump, even if you can bounce unpredictably occasionally. But for the love of god why is the wall kick in there? It has only ever served to push me from a ledge into a bottomless pit. You're looking to remove antiquated content? Start there. Some guns are not so good to shoot but there’s such a great range of guns that are fun its like complaining about one drop in an ocean; and enemies are fun to shoot at, each faction distinct in meaningful ways and presenting an effective challenge. Speaking of oceans, that’s one way to describe the lore. I haven’t dived too deep but it keeps going down forever and everything I’ve read is intriguing. As a former Elder Scrolls lore nut this is something I could definitely sink my teeth into, though its much more of a pulpy sci-fi vibe than a pure nonsense vibe. I do think the game has a bit of a loot problem, primarily in regards to the conflict between high stats and looking good. This should never be a conflict, and yes you can apply ornaments to any purple gear but that’s not enough when I spend the entire time grinding power levels and thus must change armour and weapons on a constant basis to progress. This game needs a true transmog system and if not that, rethink how gear power level works. Perhaps rather than earning new instances of gear you always possess a version of it and the loot you acquire in missions just upgrades your instance to your current overall power level? This would serve to do away with the current upgrade system which I think is a needless additional grind. Perhaps it could be retained in using enhancement cores to empower gear as present but necessitating a whole upgrade module to keep your favourite weapon on hand is kind of painful honestly. There is also at present the issue of sunsetting gear, mildly controversial to say the least. If it’s necessary to streamline the game and make it function moving forward so be it but surely loot pools should be adjusted so you can actually get useful loot from older locations? And why sunset personal instances of gear which can be acquired at the regular power level anyway? I had to throw away my favourite bow and hunt down a new version of the exact same weapon for… what reason? I do think destination navigation leaves a little to be desired also. I get that having a physical hub world is meaningful but Destiny does not have a very extroverted community; I can count the times someone noticed me in the tower on one hand. And its not even like there’s fun activities to be found in the same sense as say Deep Rock Galactic, which really does take advantage of its hub. Perhaps for players who simply want to go about their business all of the vendors could be set into a menu system where just clicking an icon takes you to their menu from anywhere in the system rather than, per se, having to go through an entire loading screen (Which takes you to orbit and back) to reach a location which serves simply as the front for four menus. These are established player problems. As a dedicated PvE player I can say that this game is immensely fun in combat and growing in power does feel really good. It’s something I recommend getting into, there’s just some very large creases that need ironing which the Bungie should really take the time to address rather than pushing out new in game content every three months.
#the truman show#horizon zero dawn#rimworld#factorio#destiny 2#d2#film#movies#video games#i dont know what im doing#hzd#opinion
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LIVESTREAM WINNERS AND TOP POINT COMMENTS
THose of you who read the schedule already know this but the winners are:
HOLLIGAY INVOKES THE SPIRIT OF CLOSET GHOST
and
WE COOK FOR DINNER IN THE APOCALYPSE
Please join me for both! It’ should be a terrifying, thrilling time.
AND NOW, THOSE OF YOU WHO MADE ME FEEL THE WARMEST. Thank you to all who answered--I know this was super self indulgent and it means a lot to me that you took the time. So, literally 12 out of the 13 of you got at least one point (One person did not give any details, or even a quote) MAZEL.
Point allocations are below!!
One point winners:
4(?)ish years ago, you sent Jet a series of letters/cards/funeral lilies, from different Sailor Moon characters. The lilies were for Mako. One card was from Michiru, after Haruka's death. I have never been able to find them again, but I just loved the care you put into them--how they were all written specifically from the character, the fact that you even put tear stains and perfume on the cards. It was just so creative and touching, and it felt like the characters were real for an instant, mourning and living and giving you a peek at their lives. --- @kumeko (That was A Little Letter, and Mako’s was actually a separate thing for the same contest!)
“Before you get yourselves killed I want to go on record as saying this is the stupidest thing you’ve ever done.” Rei stood with her hands on her hips at the front of the garage- from that short story about Mina and Haruka strapping an engine to a shopping cart. You can really feel how rei must feel, the resigned exasperation mixed with genuine, but hidden, concern for Mina and haruka’s safety. I think i have said the exactsame thing before people i know do stupid shit. --- BeefSalad33 (oh ma, an oldie but, I think, a goodie)
OH MAN. I am always thinking nonstop about that piece where Minako confronts Seiya about bullying Haruka, specifically for the line where Mina spits out "you think she'll love you for this?" and UGH that LINE. it HAUNTS me, I want to BITE DOWN ON IT AND NEVER LET GO, I WANT TO PUT IT EVERYWHERE EVER BECAUSE IT HURTS SO GOOD, AND I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT SEIYA. --- @wouldntyoulichentoknow (I’m so glad that I’ve managed to make both you and jetty grit your teeth and care about Seiya at some point ahahah)
"*But flowers grow from death and decay, don’t they? That has always been true, you know that, Mako. You are a rose of perfect beauty, grown in the rich fertilizer of your loss.*
She threw the stress ball across the room, knocking over the cup on the sink, spilling the ice down the drain."
The contrast between reminding herself of how life works, and then still being bitter about it, and knowing what she is and being frustrated about it. It's a lot, when sorting out various issues- i have trauma, and that makes me better at empathizing with people, i'm adaptable long-term, and that means i can put up with some bullshit, that kind of thing, but that doesn't mean those are wholly good things. It's nice to see it put into words, and so plainly, and with such a strong reaction of it.
Roses can still grow wild, as pretentious as that sounds with how your passage resonates to me, but it's still nice to feel that. ---- @katrani (I’m so glad it resonates with you! I liked that line a lot! )
2 point answers:
Christmas Carol, Stave 1 - “You are a terrible person,” she jutted out her chin, feigning strength. “Fareeha deserved much better than you. But,” she took a deep breath. “I still hope she forgives you, someday. Someday, I hope you will deserve it.” It feels like cheating to use the most recent thing you’ve written, but nonetheless this section conveys so much about your take on Mercy, so quickly. She may be an idealist, the peacekeeper and builder, and she may want Pharah to have a relationship with her mother that’s not this disaster, but that doesn’t stop her from acknowledging that Ana’s been the primary factor in making it what it is and telling Ana that directly. I love how you write Mercy (and Tracer for that matter) as very warm characters who try to see the best in their situations but won’t gloss over the fact that sometimes, someone does have to be shot in the fucking face. “Good” doesn’t mean “hopelessly naive”, even with a pacifist, and I appreciate that you have characters who show that.
Bonus, and a fringe case as technically part of the Fushigi Yuigi hateblog: “She was still trying to get home, had been unable to get Tamahome to let her poison him, and then Nakago had hugged her into his chest until she had been forced to flatten him with a punch to the nads. She was tired, she was hungry, and she was trying to have a moonlight bath to consider her options and wash the stink of a man off of her.
And then, Tamahome, again.” - Haruka-gets-dumped-into-Fushigi-Yuugi-as-Yui was a delight that entire episode, but this post was one of the best. Is it really just narrativizing your frustrations with the many, many writing choices that were made here? Absolutely. But it’s a fun little bit of comedic pacing here, especially with the utter exhaustion of Haruka that this bullshit isn’t over yet. (“Fuck my life” to the moon wondering if Usagi could help and regretting how hard it would be to drown herself are close runners-up on that front.) --- Regalli
(Mercy is, in many ways, my attempt to write someone who is MOSTLY a pacifist that I can respect. It’s not easy for me! I often find pacifism to be cowardice, because so often in life the people I know who are pacifists are, well, not the folks in the street. So i thought, could you write someone who is very hesitant to kill, who believes that even Doomfist, even Reaper, even whoever, deserve care if they are hurt, who believes that a sword will not leave her hand free to uplift the fallen, and make her brave? And make her strong? And so was born, Mercy, who proved that, yeah that person, at least in my mind, can exist.)
I think one of my favorite passages from your writing is from "The Rest is Commentary". Particularly the part that starts with "I am a doer. " That entire paragraph is wonderfully written, with mix of beautifully descriptive language to describe *why* you don't trust words. It's slightly paradoxical, but it also fits with the rest of the essay (?) so well. And even beyond that, I love reading when you write about your faith. You are deeply devout woman, and a personal aspiration to me. When you write about your faith, it reminds me that there is work that needs to be done to live it, and not easy work either. But it is very much worth every bead of sweat, and every drop of blood. --- @shavedjudomonkey
(Thank you so much! I love that people have connected so much with my Jewish writing)
3 point answers:
From Requiem for the Great Consummation, I adore the word play with "compose." Ie, in the line, "Michiru folded her hands in her lap and composed herself." Why? I'm a musician. So, Michiru, with her music, holds a special place in my heart. (Why Ami gets the music attacks is beyond me. WTF?) I don't think the writers ever really understood what it takes to be a musician, and while fanfic writers often include Michiru's music, I've never really seen it done well. (I'm sure it has been. I just haven't seen it.) Music is all about structure. It has to feel free and soaring, but it can only be that because of the intense amounts of tension and structure underneath. A kite without a string plummets. When I reach for high, soaring notes, that's when I have to be most conscious of having a solid base. Making music Is constant tension. So, often when I see writers portray musicians, it's all "she never felt so free and untethered as when she sang/played the,violin/piano/whatever." And I think, "wow, really? She must have been Crap." So, back to compose/compose. This wordplay shows that tension. The "I have rehearsed this 5,000 times and am still working so hard I'm sweating standing still in this freezing auditorium so that it can look and sound completely free and easy." This is Michiru's entire life. She is composing herself. She is outlining complex rhythms and tensions and resolutions that even though you hear when the piece is played, you don't fully take in or understand, and all you consciously comprehend is 'wow, pretty.' Because that's how music works. Organs have keys that can't be heard by the human ear, and composers include them in their pieces. Why? We can't hear them! But we feel them. If you look at the score for an orchestral piece, it contains So. Many. Notes. So much going on. But when you listen, all you hear is that melodic theme. But if you take out anything underneath, things change and cam fall apart. Michiru lives her life like that. She creates herself, composes herself, and it looks elegant and free and easy, but it is so so very tightly controlled and rehearsed, and that particular wordplay showed off that side of Michiru's music, which is one I don't get to see explored much. --- @incorrecttact
(Thank you so much for this!! I am NOT a musician, but so much of Michiru and music speaks to me, the structure of it, the discipline, the way it allows you to express yourself while hiding behind something else. And yes! I think of that double meaning so much!)
I want you to know... that this was very, very difficult. I made a notepad and collected shit I'd pulled out from your work where I could find comments where I did such, and then I AGONIZED. Here is where I landed but know it's so close with other things god.
"Winston worked in earnest at his inventions, and Emily went back to teaching, and the two of them began to cook for each other again. Family dinners once a week resumed, grew with some of the new recruits that were being folded into their family. Pharah and Mercy’s daughter took them to the zoo, the park, out into the world. Dva had continued the game they had all been playing before Tracer died, their party picking up after the terrible and well-done loss of their beloved rogue. ***Life did not return, but it grew forward. It bloomed again.***" — A Clock's Fading Chime
I ended up choosing this one because I hate it a little when I read it. Not because it's not good but because it's SO PAINFUL. I love so much about the way you talk about love, and I think grief is all a part of that. We grieve because we loved. The idea of the grief period, especially for those in a close circle of a lost person, being like the cycle of the seasons where a flower may die but life blossoms in the soil it left behind is so evocative and perfect and everything leading up to that last line is the soil for which that line got to bloom. The slow, simple way life returns to them, that they adjust to the heavy rock in their pack (A piece of yours I revisited for this and a metaphor I will always carry with me) and start growing stronger together. And that they find it WITH EACH OTHER too just god, it kills me. But would I rather wish it wasn't necessary? YUP. FOR SURE. It hurts to think about someone who plays Lena's role dying in our own lives and trying to mend the rift between those left behind. But it brings all those possibilities and who may have gone already before to mind because it feels so grounded in the reality of what these experiences are like and shit it's just a great sampling of everything I love about your work. Beautiful prose, saying so much with so little, grounded in stuff that feels read, and ending on a banger, transfixing line. ---- @thoughtfulfangirling
(Thank you so much! I LOVED that whole series of fics around that, as it is in the way that I often like to toy with the nature of grief, and the way that we go on. Things aren’t ever the same, but we go on. And I’m so glad you gt into it too! It’s very self-indulgent for me, basically everything with OW, so I love when other poepl like it)
4 point answers:
Given that I am not Jewish, I hope this isn't overstepping my bounds, but your passover Seder speech really spoke to me this year. Specifically the bits about the relationship between cowardice and metaphorical bondage:
"This is a celebration of our freedom from bondage, but it is a also a reminder, a call that we must ensure we do not, in cowardice, return ourselves to bondage. "
Without explaining too much, and risking the kind of parasocial oversharing that you lamented the other day in a post, this particular push and pull has been at the forefront of my mind this year. The intense gravity that the familiar, the easy, the safe, can have, versus the genuine terror of pressing out into the unknown in search of something better.
Trying to change, and to do better, and to press on, is fucking terrifying, and hard. But, that is not an excuse. And I appreciated the reminder. --- @blastoise-m
(Not overstepping at all! I am so glad that it speaks to you, I really, really love this kind of writing, and I really should get back to doing more of my Jewish writing. My rabbi is leaving, because we apparently don’t have the money to have a rabbi! And he’s readying people to be lay leaders, and called on me to be someone who could give Divrei Torah (sort of like our sermons) because of my tendency to do stuff like this, and it’s very scary! But really exciting as that’s the kind of stuff that had me interested in being a rabbi, is picking this stuff apart and applying it to our own lives HI YOU ASKED FOR NONE OF THIS SORRY)
"There are no beautiful deaths in this world, and am sorry that you must know it. Rei never was allowed to say goodbye. I watched Haruka grow weaker and more ill every single day. We each have been jealous of the other, at turns, but I tell you this truth now: Our lives mean much more than our deaths. You and Seiya had a wonderful love story, and you raised a wonderful daughter, and unfortunately it is very often difficult to finish a story in a satisfying sort of way. It is not the end of your story, simply of hers. For you, it is a new chapter"
I think this is still one of my top 5 fav fics that you've ever written. I still think of it randomly once in a while. It's such a small moment but it sold me Usagi and Seiya in a way never would have expected. It's such a moment of growth for both Usagi and Muchiru. A small moment of connection for two people who are so different.
This is wrapped up in the entire MaS series, which I could never separate from this work let alone this quote. The entire series is a series about love and all its many permutations. About finding meaning in a world when you think your meaning has been taken away. About carrying on when you think there's no reason to do so. And I think this quote really encapsulates all of that.
This story, this entire series, is one the favorite things I've ever read and I'm so glad that you decided to share it. --- @madegeeky
(I truly and in all ways love how much you love this fic, it cheers em and makes me so happy every time I am reminded of it. And thank you for loving that line! I FEEL that line. It’s been true for every death that has come to me, so I love when it has meaning for others. )
The 5 point answer:
"God separated the sky and the sea, and that’s true, but there will always be the horizon where they blend."
I'm not much of a quote person. I'll often remember the feeling or the takeaway but rarely the words themselves. This, though, has stuck with me.
There is so much in this world, and so many people, who see everything as absolutes. Black and white. Good or bad. Right or wrong. And as I've grown and changed, that has come to bother me more and more.
This quote is such an elegant and accessible way to express how that oh-so-common point of view is a fallacy. And really it's just a lovely line that invokes both lovely imagery and feeling. ---- @seolh
I FORGOT I WROTE THIS, and like the completely arrogant piece of shit I am, when I read it was I was like, “Oh fuck, that’s a solid line.” And yes I am with you on getting older and relizing that the horizon line can be so fuzzy out there, sometimes, and this quote WEIRDLY came back to me when I needed it, a lot, and so thank you!
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the twins (and Zhao Yunlan)
Warning: spoilers for the drama adaptation of Guardian (2018), some references to the novel, more mediocre translations between Chinese and English, some psychoanalysis, and more music analysis
first, props to the kings that are Zhu Yilong and Bai Yu for such astounding portrayals of their characters! the fact that Zhu Yilong has to shift between two characters—one of whom is in love with Yunlan and the other who thrives on hatred—is just... wow. and Bai Yu? like speaking from Yunlan’s perspective, imagine someone who wears the same face as your lover but holds all the wrong beliefs, all the contradicting beliefs, how heartbreaking that must be :(
the twins certainly break my heart (broke and continue to shatter relentlessly, which means i need to read more fix-it fics) because there’s just so much potential for them both??? this is why i’m such a sucker for fics where the twins work together (i.e., they share the burden of the Black Cloaked Envoy); they are equals, they should have been equals. they lost their parents at a young age; it was literally just the two of them against the world, and then the writers had the audacity to tear them apart and not just tear them apart, but make them enemies smh
(i just want me some brotherly teasing and shenanigans, is that so much to ask for? i want the twins to look out for each other but also irritate each other to no end, but they’d also never think twice about protecting each other)
anyway. right. equals. in the novel, these two are born as twin ghost kings with the same powers and same level in powers [if i’m not mistaken], but it was ultimately only Xiao Wei who caught the attention of the god Kun Lun. the drama mimics this as well with the powers the two Dixingren have: Shen Wei can learn other Dixingren’s powers, Ye Zun can consume other Dixingren and thus use their powers. their abilities are probably purposefully meant to be quite similar; this is just one of many instances where the twins, when stripped of all context, are virtually identical. but when you add in context, then the difference is of course that Ye Zun devours for himself whereas Shen Wei learns more in order to protect others.
let’s look at how the way they interact with others provides more insight into their fundamental motivations. Professor Shen is polite, gentle, kind; Shen Wei has a near-obsession with the way he looks after Yunlan and the rest of the kids at the SID. (think about how after Ye Zun “devoured” Shen Wei and Shen Wei was mortally wounded when he saw Lin Jing... and his first instinct was to smile to provide reassurance and say how happy Yunlan would be if he knew Lin Jing hadn’t died.) Shen Wei lives to give and provide; he shares his life force with Yunlan to heal his eyesight, he does everything in his power to maintain the peace between Dixing and Haixing, he wants to uphold this hard-won peace because he knows what it’s like to lose everything, and he knows the cost of this peace and the treaty in place. his self-esteem is shot to hell—look at how many damn times he tries to sacrifice himself because he thinks he’s dispensable, because he believes this is all he’s good for. Shen Wei believes he HAS to provide for the people around them in order for them to stay. after all... wasn’t it his own fault, because he was too powerless, because he couldn’t do more, because he couldn’t give more, that he lost his younger brother and he lost Kun Lun?
now let’s shift gears to Ye Zun. Ye Zun focuses a lot on the desires of others in order to manipulate them (i.e., he asks Chief Zhao what he wants in one of the latter episodes, so that they may work together instead and is infuriated by the idea of a man who does not want anything). first, why this tactic? Ye Zun was captured by the Rebel Chieftain; his powers hadn’t awoken yet, so the only way he could be useful, could stay alive, was by pleasing the Chieftain. Ye Zun similarly feels he has to provide and again, like his brother, lives to provide and deliver. see? stripped of all context, both twins believe they need to give the people around them what they want in order to have meaning/live. second, in addition, Ye Zun knows first-hand what it’s like to be controlled and manipulated by others; he knows precisely what it feels like to have his mind, his thoughts, his feelings violated by someone else. it helps (?) that he also freaking devoured the Chieftain so that Ye Zun can literally use that mind control ability. he focuses on desires because he understands, perhaps too much, just how effective this manipulation tactic is.
what about the way they talk? (another shoutout to Zhu Yilong for his phenomenal delivery of their lines again! i dont think i can credit a VA because, if i’m not misremembering, this show didn’t use much dubbing if at all, at least for two leads) Shen Wei is rather soft-spoken, patient, quiet and Ye Zun... Ye Zun is the same. Ye Zun usually does his whisper-rasp thing which 1) makes me incredibly anxious 2) might be because he’s been trapped in a pillar for 10 thousand years and hasn’t exactly had a corporeal body with tangible vocal cords to use 3) more importantly, sounds placating. Ye Zun speaks to tantalize because he seeks to manipulate. but why else would he want to placate? he grew up as a slave; it’s been ingrained in him that he shouldn’t raise his voice, it’s a survival tactic to not piss off his enemies/people with more power. Shen Wei also speaks to placate, but he speaks with no ulterior motive; if he approaches a spooked animal, he wants to help it. if Ye Zun approaches a spooked animal, he wants to ruin it.
but wait, neither of them are always so placid you say, and well, of course, and Ye Zun definitely isn’t always so calm. Ye Zun has outbursts of excitement, anger (and you’ll find that the pissed off Envoy sounds very similar...); despite the mask he wears, Ye Zun is very childish. he wears his heart on his sleeve so to speak; he smiles when he’s delighted, frowns when he’s disappointed. he’s often more expressive than his brother even though Ye Zun tends to be the one who wears the literal mask when they appear in the same scenes. he never really grew up “normally” so to speak, which is why he’s so fucking furious that Shen Wei shared his life force with Yunlan. yet another grievance from the older brother! “it’s too boring!” Ye Zun complains, now that his brother is weakened and they aren’t equals anymore; it’s too boring, this game is too boring. Ye Zun is a child.
let’s also consider Ye Zun’s obsession with power. he went from slave to leader of the Rebels in a blink of an eye; what kind of freaking backlash must that have had on his psychological state? he’s hungry for power because it’s all he knows. “i am the master, you are the slave,” he taunts Shen Wei. “where is home? i’ve had no home since the day you abandoned me,” he tells Shen Wei.
“i’m your older brother,” Shen Wei reminds Ye Zun. “i never abandoned you,” Shen Wei explains softly to Ye Zun. if all Ye Zun knows is power (think survival of the fittest), then Shen Wei falls back on family, on love. he lost his blood family young, but then Kun Lun fell into his life and lit up his entire world. the Envoy protects his own people and Haixingren best as he can. Professor Shen has his students to look after. Shen Wei has Yunlan and the family at SID. Shen Wei didn’t grow up “normally” either, but he certainly grew up in a kinder world, and he definitely at least grew up knowing what it felt like to be loved.
Ye Zun: “I want to reform this world [...] This world is filthy.”
Ye Zun wants to destroy the world and recreate it; the “system” failed him. Shen Wei wants to protect the world by improving it; he knows the “system” isn’t perfect, but he also knows there are people living in the status quo and he has no right to strip them of that. Ye Zun sees the way his brother abandoned him, the way he himself was forced to survive; Shen Wei sees all the people he loves and needs to continue to protect.
now let’s turn to the respective relationships of the twins with Zhao Yunlan. i think i’ve mentioned this in my previous Guardian analysis textpost but one of the best things about WeiLan imo is that they’re both so fundamentally good. their ideals to uphold the peace and protect not just the people they love, but all people in need of protecting, are perfectly aligned. (this is also why i like WangXian from mdzs/the untamed)
Ye Zun, interestingly, comments that he and Yunlan are the same kind of person—someone who would stop at nothing for their goals. if Yunlan and Shen Wei match, then the younger twin is right. think of the Envoy’s solemn declaration that even the mountains would not stand in the way of him upholding his promise. WeiLan literally lose their lives for their shared goals.
Ye Zun also mocks his brother that Shen Wei will be just like him, alone. but this condemnation doesn’t stem from the younger twin; the root of this lies with Kun Lun. i didn’t get why in the novel Kun Lun supposes it might have been better to kill Shen Wei at first... it’s because Kun Lun condemns him to thousands of years of loneliness both in drama and in novel. in the drama, when young Shen Wei brings up a what-if, Kun Lun (Yunlan) interrupts him and tells him that Shen Wei would still make this same choice, would still bear this same heavy burden. it is a condemnation, but it is also further proof of this understanding that ties WeiLan together. it is a condemnation, and yet it completes the string of fate and their infinite, cyclical love story.
Kun Lun (Yunlan) asks Shen Wei to forgive him if he has to disappear without warning one day. ten thousand years later, Shen Wei leads his little brother away, sparing just a few minutes to smile at Yunlan and return that lollipop wrapper to him. Shen Wei then walks away because he has complete faith that Yunlan will not blame him or curse him for it, no matter how heartbroken he will be. Shen Wei could forgive Kun Lun; Yunlan easily forgives Shen Wei.
(there’s also the parallel of betting between the twins. Ye Zun bets Yunlan on who will die first—the people Yunlan wants to protect, or Ye Zun. Shen Wei bets on whether or not he and Yunlan will find each other again. the younger twin bets with hatred and on death, the older bets with love and on life.)
i’ve said before that Yunlan brings out the human in Shen Wei. Yunlan brings out the human because they inspire love in each other; they are in love with each other. but Ye Zun, the dear little brother, also brings out the human in Shen Wei because this is truly the only blood family he has left.
the last time we see Shen Wei’s glasses is before Ye Zun tortures his older brother; Shen Wei from then on is simply Shen Wei, no Professor, no Envoy. when he stands before them all, he is Ye Zun’s older brother, and he is Zhao Yunlan’s lover. when he blocks the blow, his theme begins to play—melancholic, calm, steady. his choice to protect Yunlan is fundamentally Shen Wei. ten thousand years prior, when the Envoy breaks the mask of the new leader of the Rebels, Shen Wei’s theme also plays. his little brother has been returned to him; Shen Wei is complete. his theme plays a final time when Shen Wei explains he never abandoned Ye Zun because again, his twin Ye Zun—like his lover Zhao Yunlan—completes Shen Wei as a character. Shen Wei is a character built entirely from love, from family. when he appears as a spirit to bring Ye Zun home, to offer family, Shen Wei is wearing the Envoy’s outfit of ten thousand years ago. the twins also complete a circle; the story begins with their wrongful separation, the story ends with their bittersweet reunion.
let’s continue with this music analysis! the Black Cloaked Envoy’s theme is 《万年不负》or “Have Not Failed/Disappointed for Ten Thousand Years”. he upholds his promise to Kun Lun/Yunlan to protect the peace between Haixing and Dixing for ten thousand years in the drama and five thousand years in the novel (he also protects the Great Seal in the novel that Kun Lun protected). Ye Zun’s theme is 《染灵》or “Dyed/Tainted Spirit”. Think about how dirty he believes this world to be, and how he proclaims “10 thousand years have passed. I can finally wipe off my disgrace!” (also how he’s a ghost king/hungry ghost in the novel from the Unclean Realm/Hell).
Here’s a quote from the novel: “我连魂魄都是黑的，唯独心尖上一点干干净净地放着你，血还是红的，用它护着你，我愿意。”
[Even my soul is black, only my heart where I’ve placed you is clean; there my blood is red, I’m willing to use it to protect you.]
i dont really remember the context of this quote but i think it’s the novel equivalent of where Shen Wei cuts his wrist for Yunlan. anyway it parallels the drama quote where Shen Wei says something like “my eyes are black, my hair is black, even my soul is black... but my blood is red.” it’s just another callback to the novel i think, that the twins are in fact twin ghost kings from the Unclean Realm. (and Kun Lun is a god. thinking about Xiao Wei curbing his bloodlust to become worthy of a god’s love and attention always makes me sob)
both pieces are commanding, lots of brass, but the Envoy’s is a quiet kind of commanding. an unnoticed protector, hovering just out of focus; perhaps a touch unsettling that he’s always there, but also a relief that his presence is a reliable constant. (think of when the SID first summons the envoy and he kind of melts out of the smoke like an unobtrusive shadow) Ye Zun’s is much louder; you cannot miss him, you will witness his triumph. consider how Ye Zun wears a gold mask and a white outfit, as if he were in the spotlight; the Envoy wears all black with only hints of silver. (perhaps the younger twin desperately wanted out from his brother’s long shadow.)
the scene at the Dixing bar near the end when Yunlan retrieves the lantern. Ye Zun, dressed as the Envoy, enters and wow for a moment you can see all the hope and love in Yunlan’s face ;-; it’s Ye Zun’s theme that accompanies this false Envoy... and it almost lulls you into a false sense of victory. but it’s not the victory that Shen Wei has returned; it’s Ye Zun’s victory that he’s, in a sense, taken over/overpowered and “dethroned” his brother at last. (huge props to Bai Yu again; god i can’t even imagine... the love of your life dying to protect you but wait here he is but no it’s your worst enemy but they share the same face UGH)
the piece that plays when Kun Lun is sucked back by the wormhole is 《诀焰》or “Farewell Flame”. i think it also plays when he’s gonna sacrifice himself to light the Lantern. it sounds triumphant... but at what cost?
and the final piece i want to mention here is 《默守》or “Silently Guarding” and it’s kind of a rearrangement of WeiLan’s theme of 《时间飞行》or “Flying Across Time”. it plays when Shen Wei leaves his amber pendant behind for Yunlan to open. i always assumed this piece was from Shen Wei’s perspective but thinking again... this pendant, this lollipop wrapper, this memory of Kun Lun are what has kept Shen Wei going for so long. Zhao Yunlan is the one who has protected Shen Wei for so long. they will always protect each other. their love is a fated one.
anyway, listen to the soundtrack! rewatch and cry! if you’ve gotten this far, thank you for reading~
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If you're still taking OC asks, maybe 4, 33, 37 for Mhairi and/or Fane? 👀
This. THIS. Is a breath of fresh air that I really needed with the way my week has been going, so guess what? You get BOTH of my children! 😭😭
4. how did they feel about being called “the herald of andraste”?
Fane detests the title from the moment it’s uttered. No matter where he goes, or who he’s speaking with, if he hears it fall from their lips he usually shuts it down immediately. Fane is not a man of faith, and he never has been. He trusts in his sword, the world around him, and the will to think freely. Religion to him is like another form of slavery, and as a dragon, he saw what happened to those that followed those who proclaimed to be gods. So, to be referenced as a herald of a prophet of one? Ohhh, no, no, nooo. Fane’s more a herald of doom when that title is uttered. Also, while it angers him, it also frightens him because it is pushing the temptation of power into his hands, which Fane, throughout the course of my fic, has a hard time resisting. He also has issues with identity (especially after he learns his heritage), so constantly being no more than an icon pushes Fane closer and closer to the edge of that is his crumbling mind.
Mhairi, while far more gentile than Fane, hates the title just as much, if not more. She’s simply more subdued about it. Whereas Fane has no religious faith, Mhairi has tons, but only with the Creators. Mhairi more or less believes everything that the Dalish have taught, so when that is threatened or treated as just ‘stories’, she becomes similiar to Fane. She snaps, she bites, but she does it in a more tactful way. She’ll throw vague information about the Maker and the Chantry’s history back at whoever called her people’s faith ‘meaningless’. She’ll poke where it hurts the most as retribution, but usually feels awful for it later. Even so, Mhairi does eventually relent a bit, but she will never address herself as the Herald of Andraste. She simply becomes numb to it from other people.
33. are they afraid of anything specifically?
Contrary to popular belief, Fane is afraid of things--many, in fact. However, the one thing he is absolutely terrified of is losing himself--through insanity or who is he. This kind of pieces together with the last question, but the more Fane is referred to as something different, or something that reacts adversely to his nature as a dragon, then he gets closer and closer and closer to losing himself in insanity. He’s terrified he’ll lose himself so completely that he’ll end up killing someone he loves, or that person having to kill him. Solas already had to do that once, and the pain it inflicted was great, so Fane does not want it to happen again. So, he keeps the fear close, keeps it at the forefront, all so he can fight off what or who is attempting to change him.
I’m just gonna say it: Mhairi is fragile with a capital F. She’s twenty-one. She knows next to nothing about the outside world. And she had a very, very traumatic incident with a templar when she just came into her magic. The memory haunts Fane to do this day as well; more or less a failure in his life. However, Mhairi walked away with a scar, as well as how it felt to be silenced that day. To be helpless, to be seen as worthless, and no more than a pest, to not have a voice. Mhairi is terrified, terrified, terrified of not having a voice to shout with, to laugh with, to debate with, to defend herself with. It’s one of the reasons, in the few stories I’ve popped her in, that Mhairi’s so talkative and energetic. She’s compensating, hiding the fear with a smile and a loud tone. She wants to be heard, even if its annoying, and any time there at templars on the field, she nearly crumbles until Fane--ohhh, yeah--until Fane closes in on them. It’s another reason why Fane is so protective with Mhairi when she and Cullen begin a relationship. He’s watching, he’s observing, and hang any kind of acceptance if Cullen were to ever do anything to harm her.
37. do they like their skyhold pajamas?
Plain and simple: Fane hates them. While Fane does wear constricting leather bindings to hide his scars, he doesn’t like restrictive clothing. Also, he’s a 6 foot product of love and devotion that made him have a build like an Elvhen (I always like to think the ancient elves were taller if not larger in some regards), and a fucking dragon that was almost as tall as half a mountain! Even if tailored, those things would not work for Fane. He’s a slender muscled type, but not lithe, by any means. He doesn’t like his body being pointed out either, so the pajamas would make him feel self conscious. (I mean, this boy bashes his head into a stone wall every time Solas smiles at him, so you think he’d be able to handle Solas smoothly commenting about his body? Fane would fucking dissolve, and then attempt to put on far too many layers to hide.) Fane’s more into wearing leather armor that seals his body, and doesn’t draw attention to his leather wrappings. With Solas, he’s a little more open, but only in private.
Mhairi, however, doesn’t mind them! She just opts out the boots, and even adds her own personal flair at times! (stitching to represent her people, a different, lighter color, or adding accessories to make it pop). Mhairi likes to be comfortable while still staying stylish, so as long as she can adapt things, then she’ll wear whatever! (except Orlesian fashion. No one wants to wear Orlesian fashion. I mean, seriously.)
Thank you for the ask! ❤️❤️❤️ (*will take this ounce of serotonin with her to work because she needs it*)
#oc asks#oc: fane lavellan#oc: mhairi lavellan#dragon age#asks#thank you for the ask!#last two days have been rough for me so this was nice <3#hopefully it'll help today go a bit smoother#i'm always up for answering questions about my children!
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Why do u ship valvert? Just out of curiosity (btw i love ur art)
this has been sitting in my drafts for months because it’s so hard to explain them without going into ridiculously long detail - especially when I tend to assume everyone’s base level of knowledge of them/les mis is the musical/2012 movie with hugh jackman when there’s so much more to them in the book - but GOD okay. tldr; I’m soft for redemption and forgiveness/healing dynamics, and also very much into enemies to friends to lovers and saving each other tropes
if your only knowledge of les mis is the musical/2012 movie I totally get being like… claire what….. but I promise they’re extremely good and it’s their lost potential that makes me so invested. javert and edgeworth are so so similar except edgeworth survived and got the character arc he deserved while javert………… didn’t, I shipped valvert before I shipped narumitsu and when I started playing aa I distinctly remember thinking to myself ‘wow it’s like valvert only happy’
okay so yes we have javert&edgeworth, both two extremely black and white-law abiding characters, completely or nearly commit suicide when their worldviews are shattered (‘prosecutor miles edgeworth chooses death’ was still intended to be taken literally at first I don’t CARE), and all that good good ‘person from my past came and fucked everything up for me’. tumblr sucks today and won’t let me post photos in here for some reason so I just have to type out the dialogue :/
good ol 1-3
edgeworth: Thanks to you, I am saddled with unnecessary… feelings. […] Yes. Unease… and uncertainty. phoenix: Aren’t those kind of necessary?edgeworth: They only serve to get in my way.
and 1-5
edgeworth: I’m tired, Mr. Wright. I feel as if… something inside me has died. […] I know the path I’ve walked. You don’t need to tell me. And the path I’ve walked… hasn’t been a just one. I can’t forgive myself for what I’ve done…
to
javert derailed (his final chapter):
“However things might stand,—and it was to this point that he reverted constantly,—one fact dominated everything else for him, and that was, that he had just committed a terrible infraction of the law. He had just shut his eyes on an escaped convict who had broken his ban. He had just seta galley-slave at large. He had just robbed the laws of a manwho belonged to them. That was what he had done. He nolonger understood himself. The very reasons for his actionescaped him; only their vertigo was left with him. Up to thatmoment he had lived with that blind faith which gloomyprobity engenders. This faith had quitted him, this probityhad deserted him. All that he had believed in melted away.Truths which he did not wish to recognize were besieginghim, inexorably. Henceforth, he must be a different man.He was suffering from the strange pains of a conscienceabruptly operated on for the cataract. He saw that which itwas repugnant to him to behold. He felt himself emptied,useless, put out of joint with his past life, turned out, dissolved. Authority was dead within him. He had no longerany reason for existing.”
and then because a binch is emo
A terrible situation! to be touched.To be granite and to doubt! to be the statue of Chastisement cast in one piece in the mould of the law, and suddenlyto become aware of the fact that one cherishes beneath one’sbreast of bronze something absurd and disobedient whichalmost resembles a heart!”
but something I can’t tell if people who are only familiar with the musical/2012 movie are aware of because I can’t separate the original novel’s context from the production is that…… valjean’s death is entirely avoidable too. he literally starves himself to death and it’s so FRUSTRATING because if he just had someone to help him! he would have lived! he should have lived!! fuck!!!
jean valjean is my original father and I love him so much, he breaks my heart everywhere and especially in the novel - he tries to do so much good but genuinely hates himself and believes he doesn’t deserve anything kind, I’m JUST. valjean you drag javert out of the river and help him learn what to do with that heart he just realized he has, javert you shove soup and bread on valjean and help him learn to respect himself a little bit
they have a bunch of little nuances that I’m weak for like book!javert being described as having a heart of wood (rather than a heart of stone like in the musical) and valjean being a gardener, the fact that they keep running into each other entirely by coincidence (a lot of adaptations make it seem like javert was really out there devoting his life to tracking down valjean when no. 90% of the time it’s entirely by chance), valjean faking his death one time by pretending to drown like he’s canon an amazing swimmer, them being basically the only two people alive who know the steps the other has taken/valjean not having to wear a mask.. they are……. the definition of ‘poetic cinema’ for me except their ending SUCKS
they very much would have tapped into valjean’s entire character of arc of redemptive love and how one act of mercy to someone who maybe doesn’t ‘deserve’ it can change their life for the better, and it just makes me melt. idk how to describe this either but I also love that they’re older characters too, there’s no time limit on becoming a better person or falling in love and they just…. hit that and it makes me soft, it kills me to know that instead they both die horrible lonely miserable (ha) pointless deaths, like YES I know what the book is called and no I don’t care!!
I’m extremely particular about how I ship them where it’s only after the river and for me personally it’s very easy to ship them....... ‘wrong’ I guess? but their potential and parallels gut me and I just want them alive to see more of what life can offer. their personalities fit together so weirdly well and I just love contrasting relationships like them
TLDR again; valjean saves javert from the seine > javert saves valjean from his own martydom > awkward weird old man friends helping each other grow into bro we are holding hands. their potential is so good and I just want them alive to explore it!!!
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watching Red Dragon and Silence back-to-back was definitely interesting
for one thing, it’s fascinating to see how much Ted Tally took from his original script for Red Dragon (especially in the conversations between the respective leads and Hannibal...and at one point Crawford says “Lecter said a lot of things,” which is of course Ardelia’s line to Clarice)
for another, while I’ve always considered Red Dragon a perfectly serviceable, even a pretty good, movie and adaptation--which it certainly is--the difference between it and Silence is astonishingly wide. to a lesser extent the same is true of the book (you all know that I think Clarice is simply a better character). yet the stark difference between the two films--“this is fine” vs. “this is phenomenal”--came into pretty sharp focus watching one right after the other.
my dad pointed out that Howard Shore’s score and the cinematography had a lot to do with the effectiveness of Silence, as did the pacing. a lot of the delivery in Red Dragon (especially coming from Ed Norton’s Will, which is disappointing because I know he’s a good actor) comes off as a little rushed and a little rote. yet the movie still dragged, for me, to the point that I committed the sin of fast-forwarding through some of Dolarhyde’s scenes even though Dolarhyde is, to me, by far the most compelling and sympathetic of the trilogy’s villains!
and frankly the performances, well...they don’t compare. with the exception of a few scenes, Ed Norton felt like he was playing a role. he’s barely angry when Will is supposed to be angry. he’s just strangely even-keel, one-note. (I notice they also pulled way back on making him an alcoholic.) even Anthony Hopkins’ spontaneity, if that’s the right word, as Lecter is diminished--the scene where he’s on the phone getting Will’s home address to me fell flat because the energy and effort weren’t there (no chewing gum, no cutesy “charming” accent...) and I can hardly blame the man: he wanted to play his probably favorite role one more time, but twelve years had passed. and Dolarhyde is fine; there’s nothing wrong with Ralph Fiennes, he can hold his own against anyone, but his character just doesn’t come off properly on screen for me--he didn’t in Manhunter, either.
I will say that I really like Harvey Keitel’s Crawford. I don’t think I like him better than Scott Glenn, but I like him as much as Glenn. Keitel is kind of the “cop” side of Crawford (vs. the “lawyer” side of Glenn’s). he wouldn’t, probably, have worked in Silence at all, but he’s good in Red Dragon. I also think Molly was cast perfectly...she’s not much of a character, though, and her big moment at the climax is given mostly to Will. (Speaking of: why can no adaptation of this story commit to scarring up Will’s face in the end???)
oh, and that dinner-and-a-show scene in the cell...who the fuck consented to give Lecter metal utensils? that took me right out of it and ruined my suspension of disbelief, because ain’t no way anybody giving that boy a fork.
Ted Tally is fantastic, I wish he’d written a faithful adaptation of the final book too--that said, for the love of God, the line in Hannibal’s letter to Will is “any rational society would either kill me or give me my books” and there was no need to change that. D<
all that to say...we popped in Silence, in theory, because it was Sir Tony’s birthday--as usual, however, by the 20-minute mark, I kind of forgot I was watching it for him, because it is utterly Jodie Foster’s film. don’t get me wrong, his performance is worthy of its hype and its awards. but you end up watching the movie for Clarice, and that’s as it should be. sure, she’s not as rich a character on screen as she is in the books, but the performance is still absolutely stellar and captivating and basically I spent every two minutes thinking “god I love her” over and over. that first scene between them in particular just crackles because they are both masters of their craft (acting that is) and they are both killing it and it’s a wonderful thing to behold. her delivery is never rushed and I don’t think it ever hits a false note.
I no longer picture Jodie when I read the books, not like I did when I first read them (no, bless him, do I picture Tony as Hannibal)--that said, I still think she owns that role on-screen. I’ll never understand how more people are not head-over-heels in love with Jodie’s Starling, because God, I am.
also this exchange...
Jack Crawford is helping your career. Apparently he likes you and you like him.
I never thought about it.
Do you think Jack Crawford wants you, sexually? True, he is much older, but do you think he visualises scenarios, exchanges, fucking you?
I almost laughed out loud last night, because...Hannibal’s got it bad, doesn’t he? “true, he is much older, but...”--he’s talking about himself, even if he’s not yet aware of it.
he’s becoming aware of it, of course. later...
Don't you feel eyes moving over your body, Clarice? And don't your eyes seek out the things you want?
not in a crude way, necessarily, but aren’t his own eyes doing that? he draws her, repeatedly, after all. and doesn’t he himself visualize scenarios and exchanges with this woman he’d like to know in private life (wink wink)? it’s no wonder Sir Tony, who had to memorize and deliver this script who knows how many times, shipped it in the early 90s!
a few small things I didn’t like as much as the book, though: Barney putting out the chair for Clarice (in the book it’s Hannibal’s idea, his way of being a courteous host...a sign of his esteem for this no-name young woman, esteem he’s never shown any other visitor in the asylum before) and almost everyone calling her “Clarice” instead of “Starling” (in the book Hannibal is p. much the only one, other than her parents, who calls her by her first name, which makes it more intimate and significant)
anyway...just some very disorganized observations and thoughts. also the rat-tail on Lecter was a sin for which someone must atone. that’s all!
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