#i really don't want to make anyone uncomfortable
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So, Easy Beauty by Chloé Cooper-Jones is not by any means a straightforward tale of the specific traumas and experiences of being a disabled woman. In many ways, it's an examination of how holding onto those traumas too tightly can keep you not just from positive chances for connection and experience, but understanding when your choices and behaviours are hurting other people.
But. It does talk about the trauma. And specifically, this splinter I've spent months now slowly drawing out of my soul, because this never happened to me except for the version of it that did happen to me. In her case, it was a conversation with a friend in high school:
I approached him in the library of our school. He was studying for a geometry test. He saw me, closed his notebook, and smiled.
“I feel like,” he said, teasing me, “there might be something you want to talk to me about.”
I told him yes, there was, and I said that I wanted to go to the homecoming dance with him and would he take me.
“Of course,” he said. Relief flooded through me so quickly it turned my stomach. “But,” he continued, “there’s something very important I need to talk to you about first.”
He proceeded to tell me that our female friends had been pressuring him for weeks to ask me to the dance, not wanting me to feel left out.
“They love you,” he said, “but they pity you and their pity won't help you in the world.” I can, to this day, recall the exact even tone in his voice, his smile. He reached across the table and took my hand. “I want to tell you something as your friend,” he said. “I want to protect you. When you ask a man like me on a date, you put us in a bad position.” He was still smiling; I was having a cute delusion and was in need of his loving, if uncomfortable, correction.
“It’s just the truth,” Jim said. “No man will want to date you unless he, too, is desperate or ugly.”
What I've felt, since I was very young, was this sense not just that no one would ever love me, but that I was so pitiful, so unlovable, such a complete failure of femininity, that expressing interest in another person was tantamount to forcing them to pity-fuck me. And how could I do something that horrible to them?
Well, at least in the years since then, I've learned that actually people feel no compunction about rejecting me!
I have almost always felt like such a complete failure at femininity, to the point that discussions about the female experience feel hypnotically surreal, because these things never happen to me. Y'all get catcalled and hit on? I'm struggling to dredge up memories of experiencing that firsthand. I grew up with grownups always warning me about men who'd want me for sex but didn't actually love me, and now I'm like... being wanted for sex? What's that like? I have literally ten seconds of experience of my desire for someone else being something that excited and interested them.
This is my own personal neurosis, not a prescription for widespread behaviour. But I've always kind of hated when people talk about slowburn romances and stories with pining as "two idiots in love" because on a visceral level, it doesn't feel stupid to me to believe you're repulsive and nobody will ever want you. It has always felt like the natural and obvious conclusion to enter adulthood with.
Up until two weeks ago I've always been very careful to describe my feelings about my body as part of me being crazy--I hate the way I look, I don't like seeing or hearing recordings of myself, I think I'm not pretty. Because obviously that means I'm actively working to rid myself of those emotions and attitudes! I've got it handled! I've admitted that I have a problem!
And that's because I always had it locked away in my heart that if I tried to make a factual claim about being ugly, people would say "No you're not!" just to make me feel better, and then I would never ever know if anyone who found me attractive really meant it, or if they were just doing it out of pity.
That is crazy. That's holding onto the lesson of that fucking shitbag who found Chloé attractive and fuckable two months fucking later once he got over himself. That's sitting around waiting for someone to come climb up into my unfuckable tower and do all the work of establishing a relationship themselves. That's lesbian sheep behaviour.
It's only just begun to feel possible that I could begin to take steps to seek people out and express interest in them, instead of holding perfectly still and making someone else do all the heavy lifting to get to me, when I haven't even made it known I wanted them to.
But this doesn't get talked about as part of "the female experience". When men talk about women's experiences in the dating market, they absolutely never mean women like me. Why bother with the experiences of women they wouldn't want to fuck anyway? It's not like we're people or some shit like that.
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Hello, oh my, damn... so english isn't my first language and i wasn't sure how to phrase it better so don't worry, i totally understand being uncomfortable and I'm sorry 😅
I did enjoy your version very much and i also think that you should definitely go for a crow reader cause that is such a cute idea!
- accidentally proposing anon
No problem! And since you're interested here's some very quick ideas I had about crow reader before I go to work today!
Alastor
Nothing phases this man anymore. Niffty literally gifted him a crown of dead roaches. So when you flutter excitedly and present him with a string of shiny can tabs, you've been collecting he accepts it graciously.
"You're quite right dear, these are incredibly colorful. Yes, very shiny are you sure you don't want to keep this? Oh! You made it for me? Well, aren't you just precious."
He makes it into a necklace or even something to decorate his horns.
Vox
Valentino likes light, you like shiny things, both of you tend to like being around screens and bright colors.
Except you don't just like screens, it's anything colorful or shiny. Actually sometimes it's not even that, its just random odds and ends that caught your attention for some reason. He gets it sometimes, textures, patterns, things like that.
But you have everything from soda can tabs to random buttons to rocks of various shapes, sizes, and colors. You have different sticks and pieces of wood you found that for some reason you then had to have. Pieces of mismatched jewelry. It's cute but it also clutters up space and he eventually designates one room for your stuff and tells you to keep it condensed. You do, and swear it's organized, but it's all just a jumbled mess to him.
He's in his lair, observing all the many different cameras, looking for some wannabe actress who owed him money, when you bounce in, barely stifling excited squaking. He sighs fondly and turns to you, knowing he's not going to be able to concentrate until he sees what you want to show him.
It's a collection of your molted feathers, the best ones, sleek and iridescent, bound together with some colorful twine you found and attached to it is a miniature glass jar filled with colorful, shiny bits of plastic, metal, and rock, and corked shut and sealed with hot glue.
It makes a nice rattle sound when he shakes it and the feathers are nice to pet and run his fingers over and..."Did you make me a fidget toy? From....random stuff you found? That's, that's actually really cute, thanks Doll."
He downplays how much he uses it, but it's literally on his key ring, so you know it goes everywhere with him and if during long meetings his staff are subjected to the consistent background noise of little shiny bits rattling around in a jar, then that's their problem.
Lucifer
As you may have noticed Lucifer also tends to collect things he has no need for. But he might need it one day! Between the two of you it does get to be a bit of a problem, so you both agree to sort through and condense your piles.
It takes days cuz you guys keep stopping to show each other cool stuff you guys have. Then, several more days just to get through his numerous rubber ducks. Eventually it's down to a single room where your collections have merged. Each item carefully chosen and presented to one another like expensive jewelry or other such luxurious things. But it's a cool rock you found, a giant bronze spring, a box full of candy wrappers with clever sayings, and a scrapbook with various brightly colored pieces of cardboard from snacks, toys, shoes, literally anything, that caught your eye.
It's anyone's guess on who adds what, but you do both have to agree on it before it's added so you don't hoard things again.
That's the end, but maybe I'll go back and add Adam and some of the other characters later. I just wanted to get my initial ideas down before work.
#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel lucifer#vox x reader#lucifer x reader#alastor x reader
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Hi! If I may be so self indulgent and request something... 👉🏻👈🏻
Reader being a (for lack of better words) boring person. They're good at blending in within social circles but never standing out or having a circle or friend of their own. Good laughing at jokes but can't come up with good ones or even if they did, they don't have the courage to tell them outright. They're very much a chicken when it comes to expressing themselves as an individual because they're never comfortable enough around anyone. They are a chicken in general, to be honest. This essentially (and sadly) leaves them as an NPC in their own life. And they've accepted it, trying to come to terms with a life of extreme mediocrity. They're actively trying to push down any need of wanting more from life 99% of days.
However, when you're good at listening, you observe things much better and you learn things faster. And subconsciously, reader has been observing a lot of things about Velaris (including the IC). I'm not sure where this would lead but this is probably the only real skill they have; being a good observer and learner.
I leave the rest to you. I was thinking pairing them with Azriel (since he would probably understand her better) but I'm open to any modifications.
Also, just an afterthought, I've always wondered what job I would love to have in a fantasy world (and I don't know if this counts as an actual job) but something like observing the sky/stars to look for any forthcoming events sounds really cool. So I guess reader could do that since major events happen don't happen once in a hundred years or something which ultimately makes their job very boring. However, they love it because who wouldn't love spending their whole night star-gazing (potential date idea?? YESS).
Sorry this became way longer than I intended. I wouldn't judge if you chose not to write on it. Thanks & have a great day :)
Am I boring? | Azriel X boring F reader
A/N: Hiii! Tysm for your ask. I hope I captured what you were imagining right. 💖
summary: You’re a star mapper. And you’re boring with no hope of love. Or at least you believed that until Azriel came along.
1.2k words
warnings: no use of y/n, she/her pronouns, cussing??, romance?? That’s it?? I think?
The stars shined brighter tonight. Since you were a little girl, you had always been fascinated by them. How they sparkled. They were interesting, and beautiful- unlike you. Maybe that’s why you clung onto them.
You pulled a piece of parchment from your bag, and started mapping the stars. Rhysand, the highlord of the night court, had invited you to his court to observe and map stars from this part of the world. You accepted, wanting some change. Even if you knew it wouldn’t be much of a difference to you. The inner circle was more than nice to you, and you appreciated it.
Laughter bubbled from behind you. You currently sat with your telescope on the balcony of the House of Wind. This was your third week here. Rhysand had offered you a permanent place here in the night court, but you were yet to accept. You didn’t fit in. You were a background character. A random star mapper, a job would probably never be much of use to anyone. Except weird star fanatics. Aka you. You were sure he only offered you a place here because of pity.
The inner circle seemed to really like you, and whether that was because of your quiet and shy nature, or the fact you always listened and gave great advice, or the fact you always laughed to try and fit in even if you didn’t quite understand the joke, you didn’t know. The only one who seemed to see past your mask of people pleasing was the Shadowsinger.
Anytime you ‘laughed’ at Cassian’s jokes, he was always there, smirking with a known look at you. As if he knew you. As if he had known you your whole life. Azriel had seemed curious about you. It was uncomfortable. Nobody had ever been curious about you. Everyone always enjoyed someone that they could talk to about themselves for hours. But he was the one always interrupting the other members of the inner circle to question you, on you. And your own life. And sadly you didn’t have many answers other than, “oh I don’t know.”
It made you feel weird at how interested he seemed in you. It made you feel awkward. But you knew he would lose interest once he really discovered there wasn’t actually much to you. You were a bore.
“Those stars are named Arktos, Carynth, and Oristes. They shine above that mountain for a week once a year during the blood rite.” A voice said beside you. You flinched as you noticed Azriel sitting directly by you, his shadows swirling around you both. He was always appearing out of nowhere. He handed you a plate of cake.
“Courtesy of Elain. She baked dessert tonight.” Azriel said, lifting a bite of his cake to his mouth and chewing on it.
“Oh.” You responded, setting the plate down beside you. You quickly labeled the stars on your parchment. They were beautiful.
“Do you like cake?” He questioned.
You paused and stared blank at him.
“I’m not sure?” You responded, fiddling with your hands. “It’s okay, I guess.”
Azriel smiled at you knowingly. Loud laughter boomed from the room behind you two. He looked right at you with piercing amber eyes that seemed annoyed. As if he had noticed you flinching from the loud sounds.
“Come with me? Just trust me.” He whispered, grasping your hand gently with caution. It was sudden. And you weren’t sure. You didn’t know him much. How could you trust him? But something in your body and soul screamed yes. Why not? It was risky- but life was boring.
“Okay.” You responded, gasping as he pulled you close, his wings wrapping you close to him, and his shadows swarming around you both before all of a sudden you were now standing on a cliff. Oh gods. His hands were on your hips gently, his wings spread wide, letting you see the view.
You both stood on a cliff that overlooked a waterfall and river. The moon reflected in the water and the stars did too, creating a mirror effect. It was probably the most gorgeous sight you had ever seen.
“Its- it’s…” Your words fumbled, mouth open in shock. “Beautiful..” you whispered. His breath was hot against your ear.
“Very.” He whispered back. When you looked at him he wasn’t even looking at the view. His eyes were glued on you. And he was looking at you as if you were a goddess. Azriel’s eyes softened, with adoration. It scared you. Nobody had ever looked at you like that. With a blush you realized he was holding you like a lover. He smirked at you as if knowing you just realized it.
Azriel slowly let go and used his wing to guide you to turn around. Blankets and pillows were on the ground. Like a picnic but a nest. His shadows swirled excitedly around the set up. He guided you gently to the set up, helping you sit down before sitting beside you.
“Do you want your mapping materials? My shadows can retrieve them for you. I wasn’t sure if you’d want to just relax and enjoy this night or continue star mapping.” He murmured.
You thought for a second. This was odd. Was this a date? Or did he do this with all of his friends? Did you want to map or did you want to enjoy this night with him?
“No it’s okay.” You replied, eyes glued to the stars above. They were much clearer from this view then from the House of Wind. You guess the city lights blurred them out. But here? They were in their full glory.
“Why did you bring me here?” He seemed to pause before responding.
“My shadows told me you might be leaving soon. This is my attempt at convincing you to stay here. In the night court. With your mate.” Azriel confessed.
He watched your eyebrows furrow.
“Mate? I don’t have a mate-“ you panicked.
His wings cocooned you and his arm enveloped you. It was like he could sense your panic. He rocked you back and forth like a child. And it was comforting.
“I’m your mate. I’ve known since I’ve met you. I thought I would have more time to get to know you and the bond would snap for you, but then my shadows informed me of your soon departure.”
You swallowed, throat bobbing. You blinked a few times. “There isn’t anything about me to get to know.” You replied harshly. Azriel’s eyebrows furrowed with concern. Shadows swirled around you both, some tendrils caressing you.
“Don’t say that. I know it isn’t true. Everyday I learn something new about you. I don’t care what you say, you are the most interesting person I’ve ever met.” He said, words much louder and firmer now. He thinks you’re interesting?
“Stay. Stay with me. Let me get to know you. I don’t expect you to accept the bond anytime soon. But give me- give us a chance.” Azriel said, wings tightening around you both. His eyes bore into you, with a fierce and loving look in them. You couldn’t help but soften in his hold.
You realized then, you deserved love. And for once a belonging feeling overwhelmed your senses.
“I’ll stay.”
Hope you guys enjoyed 💗
#azriel#acosf#acotar#imagine#x reader#acotar 5#acotar fanfiction#acotar fic#azriel acotar#azriel fanfic#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x reader#azriel x you#azriel spymaster#acotar series#Azriel imagine#reader insert#azriel x reader fluff#fluff
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everyone calls people puritans when they don’t want to see raw sex on screen lately! I am wholly against censorship and believe that sex scenes have their place especially when they’re artistically done and maybe I’m a hypocrite westerner for not minding excessive violence, but sometimes it really does feel like the scenes are pointless. Unless it adds to the story I will just skip it and 90% of the time it doesn’t add to the story
righttt like i understand the viewpoint but honestly there's a reason aggressively long drawn out male gazey sex scenes were criticised in the first place and i feel that has more validity than ppl just being like. wahhh ur all loser virigin puritans who hate the human body or whatever when that's rarely the point anyone is making and if it is they can fuck off. like even just speaking on the amount of actors and especially actresses who said they felt uncomfortable shooting these scenes - even in 2024 with these intimacy coordinators or whatever - just makes my skin crawl lol! i think there's a way to tastefully and effectively confront sexuality in a narrative without making these long ass graphic usually women-focused sex scenes that barely serve the narrative and only serve to sell tickets to horny dudes. and i don't think that's puritan or anti-sex positive to say. but that's just me!
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Unknown Episode 12
This the end beautiful friends. And I wouldn't say the show is going out with a whimper, exactly, but it's certainly not with a bang. This will remain one of my all time favorite Taiwanese dramas, but I will definitely be remembering it as being so so excellent for 10 exquisite episodes that built to such a beautiful peak and then inexplicably blew it on the dismount.
We already talked about episode 11 and the sex scene blunder, as well as some of the other missed beats there. Episode 12 moved on from the immediate aftermath of Yuan and Qian getting together to give us a sense of what their lives will look like now that they are together. One thing I definitely appreciated is that they aren't hiding this from anyone--they are taking the no shame approach to the change in their relationship, and I love that. I don't know that I entirely bought how brazen they were being, though. Making out in the open office space where Qian's employees could see seemed a bit much even if they weren't brothers, and given that the show didn't portray any awkwardness or any of Qian's expected discomfort with this big shift in their relationship, it came across a little silly and dismissive of how serious a change this should be for them. I would have really enjoyed Yuan threatening Qian with kisses if it had been a more private moment. And I deeply hated the top/bottom discussion amongst the fujoshi coworkers, that was just in poor taste and out of step with the tone of the show (can we just ban bls from doing scenes like this already?).
This final episode also failed to meaningfully resolve Qian's health issue in favor of introducing a new plot: Lili's accidental pregnancy. I have mixed feelings about this development. On the one hand, it helps to reinforce a theme of this family's resilience and ensures they will have a family legacy, and it led to hands down my favorite scene in the episode, which was the family discussion where they were moving between the bedrooms as Qian learned of the pregnancy, promised not to attack San Pang, and then immediately attacked San Pang when he stopped hiding. That was comedy gold and the cast was so excellent in every beat of it. On the other hand, I don't love this plot direction for Lili and I don't think the show really did anything to reckon with what a monumental wrench it will throw into her life plans (note that this is another departure from the book, where Lili ends the story a successful jet setting model who is still single and living her ideal life traveling for work). Lili wants a career in fashion modeling and entertainment; how exactly does having a child at age 23 fit with those goals? The show didn't even bother to consider her future in the way this story was framed. I would have preferred a time skip to do this plot at a more appropriate time for her; as it was this just felt a little careless.
In the end I am glad we got to see the family accept each other's relationships and Qian and Yuan settling into living alone together in the home they love, but I do wish the final two episodes had lived up to the promise of the rest. It felt like the first 10 episodes built so beautifully to a monumental relationship change, and then the show just kinda shrugged their way through the actual change in favor of random new plots and a list of ill-fitting Taiwanese bl tropes. After everything they went through, all tension evaporated instantly, no one was uncomfortable with the relationship becoming romantic, and there was no real nuance in the family discussion about it. They simply didn’t finish the story they started and given they had such strong material to work with from the novel, I will never understand why.
That said, even with a lackluster ending I will always be grateful that we got this gem of a show. Despite its flaws, this story contains some of my all-time favorite characters and relationships. Hats off to the cast and crew for delivering one of my favorite dramas of the year. And I want to also thank the folks on here who made discussion of this show every week so fun. We are a tiny little fandom but the love and devotion to this show was so lovely, and I am extra grateful to those who stuck to the weekly pact for the final episodes so we could keep posting and talking about this story for a couple more weeks. I hope we find another show to love together very soon!
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You Will Be Okay
Astarion (Bg3) x reader
TW: Mentions of Self Harm. Do not read this if this will trigger you or make you uncomfortable. If you struggle with self-harm or suicidal thoughts, I strongly recommend you reach out to someone.
Over 2k words. Probably. I don't know how to get a word count in my notes app 😭
Not proof read
"I think I hate myself." It slipped out. Fuck. It slipped out, you didn't mean to say that. Not right now. Not when everything was going so well?
Astarion stood there, tensed up. "What?" His face was flickering between concern, and confusion, and... whatever else that was.
You weren't going to repeat it. You couldn't. You were already panicking from saying it once, you couldn't imagine saying it again. Much less having a conversation about this. "I need to go." You said, too loud for talking, but too quiet to be considered a yell.
"OH no you don't" He grabbed you by the wrist as you were turning out the door. "We need to talk about this."
"I can't. No... No. No no no no nonono I can't—I can't do this. I can't do this astarion not today not toda-" You were pulling away, but that only tightened his grip. He pulled you into a hug. And although it was a loose one, it still made you feel trapped.
"Okay. Compromise. You've shown me how important those are." You looked at him, still panicked, but you were willing to hear him out. "You can go. But!"
Of course there was a but.
"only if I come with you. And!"
Another condition?
"Only if we talk about it when we come back. We don't have to talk at all while we are out. I'd prefer it, but it isn't a necessity. I just need you to not be alone. Either way, someone needs to be with you. Whether it's me, or say... one of our other companions? If you don't want this to linger in the air? I'm sure anyone of them would be happy to accompany you for an outing."
He was being. Suprisingly considerate about this. Accommodating. But now was not the time. You needed out, now.
You pulled out of the hug, fast. Not that it wasn't appreciated, but it was starting to feel more suffocating. "Alright. Alright. Okay. Yes. Fine. Good. Great. Awesome!" You felt a touch on your hand again. "Okay. Hoooo" you let out a breath. Then took a few more deep ones. "I'll take Gale. Is that okay? I mean you can come too but I really, really don't want to talk about this and if you're there I know I'll want to and I really can't." Your words were getting faster the more that came out. You took another breath, "But I will when we get back. Okay?"
"Okay. Be safe, I'll be around. I love you" Astarion sqeezed your hand tight, and then let go. He followed you and Gale out of camp, grateful (for once) that you and him were close.
Once Astarion saw you and Gale off, he made his way back his tent. Considering you weren't feeling the best, he knew he had roughly an hour to prepare.
You hated yourself? Blasphemy. Well... not blasphemy. He had seen you, the faint scars in the most random of places. Places that would be too well protected to be done by an enemy. The scars and cuts—just deep enough to have been recent, the constant torn skin around your fingertips. So he supposed he should have already known, but he didnt know you still felt this way.
He had plenty of experience hating himself, but he didn't dwell on it like you did. He swallowed his hatred and turned to bad habits - habits you were helping him fix. Now it was his turn to help you.
He had begun by cleaning. It wasn't necessarily messy, but he had seen your belongings and how they had gotten out of order. Once everything was in its proper place, he started to plan how to tackle this.
It wasn't something to be taken lightly, and it wasn't something that would be solved in a day. This conversation was a start, but it certainly wouldn't be the end. What did he bring up? How much could you handle? Did he mention that he had his suspicions, or did he leave that alone? Gods, this was hard. You've seemed so put together on your journey that he thought this was resolved a long time ago. When was the last time you'd hurt yourself?
Nothing much got accomplished in that hour, not that he could without you there. And before he knew it, you were home.
You sat down on a cushion, not having the luxury of a chair at the moment, and looked into Astarion's eyes. You knew you had to be the one to start this conversation. You knew it, but that doesn't mean you had to like it.
"Thank you," Astarion raised an inquisitive eyebrow. "for giving me space."
He gave a light smile, "of course. You have done the same for me countless times, and I know how hard these things can be. I will never pressure you into an immediate conversation. But, my dear, we need to talk about this. You can't be hating yourself. You are wonderful. I know some simple words of praise won't wash this away, but I need you to know that you are good."
Astarion came to sit next to you, close enough where you could feel his presence, but not be overwhelmed.
Feelings were bubbling up. Everything was coming up. You could feel tears start to stream down your face, falling whenever your breath shook your entire body with force. "I just hate everything. I hate myself. So much. Astarion, you don't know what things were like for me before. I was pitiful. You wouldn't have even spared me a thought."
You inturupted yourself with near hysterical sobbing. The thought of not being with him was too much to bear with all your emotions. "Go on. It's safe. You are safe here" He placed his hand atop yours and gave it a squeeze, like earlier.
"I. Uhm. I used cut myself. A lot. I know you've seen the reminents of it. I just." You took a minute to catch your breath before continuing. "I just couldn't tell you. Because there wasn't even a good reason for it."
"I didn't like the way I felt. I didn't like the way I looked. The way I acted? I felt like such a burden to everyone. And now I'm such a burden to you? And I know you'll just say that I'm not, but I should have been able to resolve this on my own. If I'd had my way, you would have never found out and thought my scars were from some brave battle. It wasn't a brave battle. It was self loathing."
You took another crying break. How long was this going to go on? How much of your guts would you spill before you broke?
"And I still think of it. All the time. I still hate myself. I still feel the urge to destroy myself in the only way I know how. But I can't afford to. I'm trying so hard to stay put together for everyone here. I want you all to live. But I really don't want that for myself."
Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit shit, shit! Well now he knows everything. No turning back. Not that there was before, but your in too deep to even try and bury this.
He was sitting in front of you. You saw he was taking in everything you were saying at lighting speed, but you couldn't tell what he was thinking. He just kept rubbing circles into your palm, and handing you tissues at the appropriate moments.
You paused a bit too long for it to be considered normal in a conversation, so he urged you to continue. "Darling, I won't judge. It's okay, you can keep going."
You once again took some deep breaths. "I uhm... I tried to kill myself a while back? It didn't work, clearly, but the thought of it never truly went away. I uhm.
...
I still.. want to? And it's not that I'm unhappy, don't get me wrong! Every moment of joy has been genuine. But it's all being muffled by a blanket of sorrow and despair? That is dramatic oh hells. But yeah. I think uh. I think it's all out now?"
You sighed, both scared and relieved. You didn't want him to think that you didn't love him just because you didn't want to be here. You loved him so much it was probably one of the few things keeping you. Not that you would tell him. That is too much of a burden to put on one person.
So this is what you've been thinking. It explained a lot. The seemingly random guilty looks, and the distance whenever he tried to get closer. He had stopped pursuing you as a form of protection and deceit a while ago, but he had always thought that was the reason for your distance.
Now it was his turn for the big breaths. "My love." He drawled out the endearment. "It's okay. You're okay. We will get through this. You will get through this. Can I hug you?"
You nodded before he grasped you tightly.
"I'm right here. And I will be with you every step. Every setback you have. You can fall back on me"
He stroked through your hair once again, holding you tight into his chest, "Thank you for telling me. Now, this will be something that comes up every once in a while, okay? I know it won't be a comfortable topic but check-ins are necessary. I need to know how you're doing, because," He paused just enough for dramatic flair, "Whatever would we do without our fearless leader!"
It had managed to calm your tears, if only a little. Just what he had hoped for. The smallest laugh that escaped your breath was music to his ears, even between the hics and gasps as you recovered your breath.
"I just want you to know that I'm trying. I'm trying so hard. The feeling comes and goes. And right now is just a time where I need to be around people more. I need more support. But I'll be okay. So if you'll still have me..?"
Ugh, Idiot! Why would you say that last bit. He would never-
"I would never leave you over this darling! What do you take me for? If anything, this is just an excuse for me to constantly drape my arms around you. Whisper into your ear..."
He stands up and struts behind you. Wrapping his arms around you, he whispers, "tell you how much I care. How much I love you." And you smiled. Hells, you let out a laugh.
"See aren't I just amazing? Can make your mood with just a few words. I love you." He smirked, letting out the last bit of tense breath against your neck as he set his head on your shoulder. "I love you," he whispered again.
"I love you too, Astarion"
That day, he didn't let you go once. He stayed right by your side. You went out of your tent for dinner, and found that while you napped, Astarion told Gale to make your favorite. You don't often get nights of calm, but despite the rocky start, today was good.
Things were said, and things were learned, but everything would be okay.
You will be okay.
Author's Note: Please, once again, if you struggle with self harm or suicidal thoughts, reach out to someone. Things do get better, I promise you. There are many help lines and local resources, a quick search on Google will pull them all up.
If there is a way I can better phrase the trigger warning, please let me know. No one had any suggestions on my last one, so I'm going to assume that it was okay.
#bg3#bg3 tav#bg3 x reader#bg3 x tav#astarion#astarion ancunin#astarion x gn!tav#astarion x reader#astarion x tav#astarion x you#tw#tw self h4rm#tw s3lf harm#tw selfhate#x reader fanfiction#x reader
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I was listening to this song: https://youtu.be/NX8InjXV2OU?si=2uV0WVUnfmwh8sV-
And for some reason, my mind turned it into something from Serial Roommates + Dark Forced Family.
I started checking the tags, and found these posts that only gave me more inspiration.
https://www.tumblr.com/nunalastor/747262889398845440/lucifer-seethes-when-he-sees-guy-go-into-alastors?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/nunalastor/747942181663375360/dark-forced-family-serial-roommates-what-if?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/nunalastor/748601558208593920/serial-roommates-dark-forced-family-dark?source=share
https://www.tumblr.com/nunalastor/748694178013331456/guy-really-wanted-to-know-why-lucifer-disliked-him?source=share
So now it's everyone's problem.
Little girl, you've no idea what you've got yourself into
Fly for a night and think the world's made for you
Well, I've tried too hard to see all of my work come undone
Better grow some wings real fast
Lucifer was fine with how things were now. He and Charlie had restored their relationship, he was supporting her with the hotel, and even heaven began to get involved, to believe that redemption was possible...but, the method they used, who they sent to show their support...he didn't agree. Guy seemed to feel a little too comfortable visiting hell.
I see the way they look at you with tears in their eyes
Soon they'll start to dream of different lives
Well I won't let you tempt them
They are mine to protect
No use reminding them of the past
He watched as Guy approached everyone, talking about his own life before and after arriving in heaven, telling them about how everything would be okay when they were redeemed. His words seemed to give hope to the members of the hotel, but that also included the members of HIS family. There was no problem if it were only the new clients that were arriving after the failed extermination, but it was also targeting Husk, Niftty, Angel and Alastor. Alastor's eyes always glazed over when he heard Guy talk about old times, about a shared past.
You don't seem to quite understand what is at stake
This messed up little family that I had to make
If I could let them all go home, please know that I would
But it'd do more harm than good
Lucifer knew that Guy meant well, and he really wanted to support Charlie, but his family members were off limits. He knew even Charlie and Vaggie would agree with that. He could see how uncomfortable Vaggie was when Guy talked about how wonderful heaven was, and he shared the sentiment, they both came from there after all. And Charlie, he could see how she wanted to be happy and excited, but he could also see how much she wanted to hide her pain at the thought of her family members going to heaven, separating from her, abandoning her (again).
So why don't you fall?
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
Why don't you fall?
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
He tried to convince Guy to focus on the new members, but the stupid dog was determined to help everyone, especially Alastor. He had to do something. So he tried to scare him away.
Swear it's nothing personal
It's a necessary evil
Why don't you fall?
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
His first attempt was to whisper in the ears of those who were against heaven, those who lost someone important in the past exterminations. Without anyone noticing, he made sure to light a flame. The next time Guy left the hotel with Alastor, those sinners tried to attack the angel...he should have known that Alastor would protect him.
Some would say I'm quick to rage
And maybe they're right
But I can say, for once, I'm thinking clear tonight
Wendy, darling, you have picked the wrong girl to fight
I will protect what is mine
That attack on Guy, for some reason, only made him more determined to redeem Alastor and the members of the hotel. Guy insisted that everyone, even his attackers, deserved another chance. He said that Heaven had done enough damage with the exterminations, and now he could try to make up for it. Lucifer agreed, seriously, but not if it was his family members, they were his, Alastor was his.
A nasty little spark that must be smothered, snuffed out
Setting fires inside my house is just not allowed
If ending errant embers is what I must do
Then, darling, I'll be coming for you!
He couldn't take risks anymore. Guy went from being a nuisance to being a threat, and he couldn't allow that threat to continue hanging around his home.
So why don't you fall?
(Why don't you fall?)
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
Why don't you fall?
(Why don't you fall?)
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
His second attempt was a little more drastic. He made sure to keep Rosie and Alastor distracted. Somehow, subtly, he convinced Susan that Guy was a problem. Honestly, he didn't have to do much to convince her, she didn't like Guy either. And it wasn't difficult for her to convince some members of Cannibal Town that a winged dog would be a great addition to the menu.
Swear it's nothing personal
It's a necessary evil
Why don't you fall?
(Fall)
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
(Why don't you fall?)
He didn't know that Alastor had left a shadow to watch over Guy when he was away. When the cannibals tried to bite him, the shadow protected him. It did this without harming any members of Rosie's community, just keeping them away long enough until Alastor and Rosie arrived. Lucifer realized that Alastor genuinely cared about Guy...this was no longer a game.
(Music)
Lucifer remembered, vividly, how things were before. Like heaven abandoned him. How his wife left him. How Charlie walked away from him once. How Charlie couldn't stop crying for weeks over the loss of Sir Pentius, one of her own, a member of her family. He couldn't let it happen again. Charlie would never lose a member of her family again. He would never lose a member of his family again. They would not abandon him again.
Why don't you fall?!
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
Or did it slip your mind?
You need three things to fly
Let's see you try when I remove mine
His third attempt was more elaborate. First, he warned heaven, and Guy, that there were anti-redemption groups. Second, he approached those supposed members, whispered in their ears again, more insistent this time. Third, it made the Vees the faces of that movement. Velvette was difficult, but he managed to convince her when some of her best models, for some reason, showed interest in joining the hotel. Valentino was easy, just mentioning how much Angel was progressing along with the revelation that redemption was possible, was enough to send him into a fit of rage. He had an understanding with Vox, they wanted Guy to disappear. Vox also saw how comfortable Guy was in hell. Guy seemed to forget that there were three reasons why he was allowed to come to hell. One reason was Guy's own insistence on wanting to help. The second reason was that heaven authorized the visits. The third reason was that he, as king, authorized his stay. Lucifer has already revoked that permission.
Why don't you fall?!
Fall, little Wendy Bird, fall
I'm gonna clip your wings
Cut your strings
Babe you won't
Feel a thing
Now that you're feeling tall
Why don't you...
Fall?!
The attack took everyone by surprise, practically the entire front of the hotel was destroyed. Alastor was ready to protect the hotel, but Lucifer made sure that he, and everyone else, was knocked unconscious, but only after they saw those responsible. The faces of the Vees would be etched in the minds of his family members, and they would associate their unconsciousness with Velvette's potions or Valentino's drugs. He stayed out of it, as far as his family knew, he was at a meeting, no one saw him leave his family unconscious, and Vox's drones recorded the moment Vox pulled the trigger, the bullet passing straight through Guy's forehead, the only one conscious, who was close to Alastor, possibly trying to protect him from the attack. The cameras also showed him appearing in time to save the others. He just has to convince the sky that the attack was on the hotel and that Guy was collateral damage. Hopefully, if they send someone else to take Guy's place, they will understand that HIS family is off limits. Those who don't understand it, well, they will have to fall.
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Because I am his, and he is mine.
Idea, Y!Rook threatening a random lady that wouldn't leave Auron alone. Graphic but like Yandere so yeah- cracking heads, thinking of killing, possessiveness but its mutual.
Rook tighten the grip on the shovel as their eyes locked with Elizabeth. Rage was boiling in them, their skin felt like a fire and their head was pounding to the rhythm of their heart. They stalked her for a few months, needing to learn how their prey worked so this plan of theirs would go without a hitch.
It was funny, all this could have been avoided if that fuck lowlife bitch who doesn't even deserve a sliver of Auron's time...Just left him alone! At first Auron handled it well.
"It's nothing but a crush, dear. Don't worry yourself over it." Soothing his lover he gave the a kiss. That was months ago, Elizabeth just couldn't get the fucking hint he was happy. In the most loving and strong relationship anyone could DREAM of, the one she wished- no prayed for. Like some higher being would make Auron realize she was the better 'choice'.
Flowers, cloths, cologne, and alcohol was sent to him on different days. At first Rook scoffed at it, please like Auron would ever be swayed by things he could get at the drop of a hat! The gifts were given to co workers of Rook, Trish gave them the idea. It was good because some of the co workers really liked them, but when Elizabeth kept coming to the office unannounced to see Auron wearing his gifts.
She kept a poker face when she saw random people with her gifts to her 'one and only'. Elizabeth than thought just giving it personally, would work. Trish was cold to her after the first time, at first thought it was sweet but told her never do it again. But this stupid fucking bitch kept doing it, Rook wanted to take a pencil from their desk and slit her fucking throat and watch the blood pour out while giving her heart to Auron. Elizabeth even called Auron pet names that Rook was only privileged too, the fact they had to bite their tongue as the bitch tried to hang off his arm.
Strutting into the office like she owned it, everyone hated her, Auron was always trying to be professional. Auron and Rook had a date to talk about it, they both are obsessed with one another, Rook knows he'd never leave them. But the fucking fact she has the balls and the audacity to go up to their man, partner, and lover that only had eyes for them. Making him uncomfortable...In the limo Rook was on the side she was on. The silence setting in of the shit the bitch did seeping into Rook's memory and their thoughts.
"I want to crack her fucking head open for touching you." Slipped out in the most venomous hiss, Rook could let out. Auron gently lifted his right hand, stroking his lover's hair, who had their head on his shoulder and they were clutching his left arm.
"If she does something drastic we can deal with it." Softly spoken as he gives them a kiss. Both sides wanted her gone, but if Rook dealt with it first there will be a body that needs to be hidden. Auron just sees this lady as a distraction because shes up in his office when she can and he hasn't been alone with Rook at work for a minute. It was annoying him, so when he saw her once again in the office the next day he snapped.
"Get. Out." Iced shards disguised as words shot out into Elizabeth's heart. She shook her head gently as if trying to tell, Auron, what to do which mind you, isn't something you want to try because that will NOT work out well. Taking in a breath through his nose Auron felt the anger rising, causing him to get a headache, this lady just won't catch a fucking hint? "How many times have I fucking TOLD you to leave me alone politely?" The black haired women tried to speak but was cut off, "I will be having security escorting you out." Words made the woman's heart shatter.
Security came quickly escorting the woman gently as she was still in shock at what was told to her. But seemed to snap out of it when Rook walked by and greeted her quickly. Turning her head Elizabeth gasped as Rook was welcomed into Auron's office by him personally. And before the doors closed Rook showed off that his love was only theirs to have, as Auron wrapped a arm around them, giving them a kiss on the lips.
"YOU FUCKING SKANK!" She screamed as she got farther away from her crush. Is that why he didn't look her way? Because of that mediocre person? They weren't even pretty! Unlike her they wouldn't be accepted by the public! She's obviously the better choice! Elizabeth and Auron would have been a match made in heaven!...She bet that Rook had something above him for black mail. She just has to figure out what it is and free Auron! Then he'll see she was better than that fucking slut.
Months went by and Elizabeth had nothing on that 'Rook" Auron was forced to call them lovingly. But what she didn't know Rook was better at covering their tracks than her. Emails, interviews and old blogs gave Rook all the information they needed of Elizabeth Lovechild. She woke up around 7 am to get ready to go to her job by the office, she has a break between 2 and 3 pm, thats what she used her break for? Please Rook could drop anything and see Auron whenever they wished or if he wished.
A key detail stuck out to Rook, Elizabeth met Auron when she first moved to the City. Posting about a gentle red head that helped her to the train station after a man tried to grab her. Calling him her guardian angel and stuff, Rook really wanted to bash her delusional head in even more. This was because there was so many posts about Auron, how she would give him children, food, love, and support more than anyone could ever think of. How she would get rid of anyone that come between them, even breaking up with her boyfriend that couldn't even meet her standards that Auron reached so quickly.
Also how she figured out who Auron was after seeing him in an article about him being a rich bachelor. The obsession about him got bigger as she tried to learn where he goes for eating, enjoyment, and other things. Giving her followers posts how she was better than any of the toys he played with before her, they couldn't stay with him more than a night is because he was looking for her. Rook was giggling as they found that, Auron who was cuddling them asked what was going on.
"Hhmm nothing much just found Elizabeth's blog where she talks only about you. It's really fucking pathetic." Humming as they showed the pone to him he scrunched his nose in annoyance and kissed Rook's head. "I don't even remember that interaction where I first met her." Truthfully Auron forgot all about her, he's a busy man that needed everyone at a distance, he also doesn't remember crazy love sick girls that run after him. Rook giggled even more as they tossed their phone on the bed and turned to Auron, kissing his neck and getting a groan as they nipped at it.
"I know and I'm going to deal with it next week. She tried to get information on me but I have so, so much on her." Auron chuckled "If you want too, do it. I'll cover it dear." The permission they got made them fall even more deeper with Auron. The next day Rook had a off day, telling Auron they were going to go to Elizabeth to handle her he nodded.
"Be safe okay?" Seriousness was in the command he gave, Rook kissed his cheek "Of course love, she wouldn't even be able to touch me." Even when Rook said that Auron was a little paranoid to leave them to deal with it. So slipping a small tracker on them he set them off because sadly he had a meeting to go to. Now Rook knew Elizabeth was going to use this day to stalk them, she had nothing and she was getting skittish.
Walking pass her apartment Rook knew Elizabeth was following, she was sloppy making too many mistakes that Rook knew exactly where she was behind them. Rook went to the store, simply looking at things and at one point even a worker came up to them telling how there was a suspicious character following them. feigning surprise they used this to their advantage "Can I be let out the back so I can call someone to help me get home?" The worker nodded and rushed them to the back where they explained to the manager about the woman following Rook.
The manager even gave a shovel to Rook in case the woman got the hint they were running away. Rook, acting like the innocent helpless person thanked them and walked in the back alley's. They heard something fall and decided it was now time to act, whipping around they held the shovel to their chest.
"Is..is someone there?" Quivering their voice just right as Elizabeth came out around the corner. Wild eyes meet Rook's, like a wolf finally catching their prey but Rook was the apex predictor she forgot existed. The woman said nothing as they got closer to them, a knife flashing in her hand as she brought it in front of her.
"I'm going to get rid of you. Then Auron would finally only love me!" Shooting forward the stupid bitch didn't see Rook's shovel in their hand. Rook swung the shovel like a bat and connected with Elizabeth's arm that was holding the knife. A piercing scream was heard as the woman fell to the ground holding her broken arm. Looking up, her breath hitched as Rook showed their crazy smile then the giggling started as Rook raised the shovel again. Elizabeth tried to shield her head with her other arm which was broken as well. Another scream was heard, luckily it was a busy day as cars in the distance honked and roared loudly.
"Awe I thought you were gonna get rid of me?" Elizabeth growled at them as she shuffled backwards pathetically. "What would Auron think?" The woman froze, looking at Rook again "He already wants you gone and I want you dead." Elizabeth started shaking like a lamb as Rook go closer. The person still standing put the shovel to her throat and began "I know where you live, work, where your family lives, your friends, your blogs and the fact no one will come to save you." Elizabeth could have sworn horns came out of their head as they told her all the things she does in a day.
"Are you okay? I checked your location and you haven't moved I was so scared you...What the fuck are you doing here?" Cold words were pointed at Elizabeth like the knife she had for Rook earlier. Which Auron saw, and glared darkly at the woman who was bleeding.
"I could have you stripped of everything if I wished because Auron would do anything to make me happy. He's madly in love with me, you know? But you just couldn't fucking get it through that think skull of yours!" Resentment seeped through their words as their voice got louder and the shovel got more into her neck. Elizabeth couldn't even responded as she was trying to think of a way out, but her mind went blank as all the things about her was thrown into the air. Then there was a noise of a car pulling up and a door slamming shut, Auron was here! She had a big smile but it was ripped away when Auron checked over Rook.
"Did you try and hurt my partner?" Words meant blood as he stood high and tall before her. Elizabeth tried to speak but Rook beat her to it, "She followed me all day apparently, I was shopping and if a sweet worker didn't tell me she probably would have tried to hurt me in the store." Rook gripped the shovel tighter "I didn't want to hurt her, Auron..." Small tears began to fall and Auron's anger became more clear. Whipping out his other phone he made a call, telling a doctor on the other side to go to this location to treat someone and get the away from him or the body will need to be hidden.
"I'm going to tell you this once, because I had to repeat myself os many times with you and I honestly don't care what you do after I leave. Dont EVER come back." Elizabeth chocked on her siliva at those words. But...he loved her? W-
"Why? You may ask? Because if you do I will have you fucking tortured for thinking you could hurt my partner." The woman looked to his side where he was holding Rook, their eyes only on him as they smiled sweetly at his words. The person on his arms smiled at her after getting kiss from Auron, "See what I mean? Auron would do anything to make me happy." Sounds around them started to muffle in Elizabeth's ears as she looked down, everything was hitting her. Dreams, her heart, and her dignity was shattered by one person a person that didn't even deserve Auron.
Hatred filled her as she thought about everything that she could have being taken by one person. She didn't even care what she was screaming "Why? Why them? Their nothing and they deserve to fucking DI- ACK!" A hand was wrapped around her throat before she could finish. Auron tighten his grip as she gasped for breath, the the burning fury he had against this woman for insulting Rook was overriding his logic side for a second.
"Apologize." Commanding and firm the simple words made her do it quickly. The apology was a stutter of shallow breath, then Auron threw her on the ground, wiping a hand before escorting Rook to the car. Loud gasps filled the quiet alley way as Elizabeth tried to think of what to do, the car drove off and she felt desperate for someone to help her quickly. Her arms and neck hurt so much, she started to sob on the ground, she didn't care anymore just wailing like a wounded animal.
•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•
And with that I'm ending it here bc if I go any farther I'm gonna lose my marbles! This was suppose to be a small thing than it got like super fucking long </3
#red rants#yuurivoice#yuurivoice auron#red writes#holy shit did I cook here#also this was so long omg
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Kataang could have been developed more after The Invasion Kiss but on the other hand it is important that katara hugged him after the defeat and stood very proud next to him when he thanked everyone for participating. Then they were very chill sitting next to each other in the western air temple and even in sozins comet part 1 after their biggest fight so far they stood next to each other in their group hug and katara watched him training when zuko taught him how to redirect lightning. If aang was really such an incel or simp like people make him out she would try to avoid him at all costs but she didn't.
I agree with you, if Katara was at any point uncomfortable by Aang's advances...actually, the only two advances he has ever made at her, she would definitely distance herself from him, or, knowing Katara, would just talk to him. Of course even after the kiss at the invasion Katara is comfortable with Aang. It wasn’t even their first kiss, they canonically kissed in the cave of two lovers!
Don’t even get me started on the topic of people calling Aang an incel HOLY SHIT that is a different level of dumbassery, please. I don’t even know where it’s coming from. The way Aang kissed Katara in the invasion? Well let’s see, Sokka kissed Suki THE EXACT SAME WAY IN THE SERPENTS PASS AND NO ON EVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THAT. So please tell me, how the way Aang kissed Katara is any different from the way Sokka kissed Suki?
Plus people who call him an incel think he forced Katara to be with him, bothered her after she told him to stop multiple times. And please, what show are you people watching? Aang never lets Katara know he has feelings for her until the invasion episode!!! Where exactly is the forcing? Where exactly is Katara turning him down? Are you making stuff up?
The kiss in the cave was initiated by Katara, Aang didn't let her know of his feelings for her. If she knew he liked her, she wouldn’t be offended when Aang tells her he wouldn’t want to kiss her. She's offended because Aang makes her think he doesn't like her...why would that offend her if she herself didn't like him, and didn't want him to like her back?
The first time Aang EVER shows Katara he has feelings for her is halfway through the third season! And the only time Katara turns his advances down is in the last episode before the finale, after which we never even see them together. Aang totally backs off until she’s the one who kisses him in the finale.
The whole time Aang is pining for her secretly. He just has a crush on her, and even that is exaggerated by the haters. It's not like they don't have a relationship outside this crush. The crush is such a minor detail in their relationship. They have mutual respect, trust, they're each other's moral compass and biggest supporter. Aang's crush on Katara comes up in 13 episodes out of 61! I literally counted! And I counted every tiny thing like Aang blushing at Katara in City of Walls and Secrets, something that lasts 1 second. MOST of those crush moments are so tiny and have little to no impact, but even counting those, it only comes up to 13 episodes! And some of them don't even include Katara in them, like The Guru. So if the crush is not referenced or mentioned in 80% of the show, how exactly is Katara pressured or pursued constantly, to the point where she has to tell him to stop? Did the turning him down get lost somewhere between all the kisses on the cheek Katara gives him throughout the show?
Look, I would take all that criticism seriously, but literally anyone who ever said that is a ZK shipper. Which just makes it disingenuous, because they’re only saying all that stuff to prove their ship should've been canon...which in no way makes it canon anyway so what's the point for all this hate? I just don't get it for the life of me.
#atla#avatar: the last airbender#avatar the last airbender#avatar#aang#kataang#katara#pro kataang#anti zutara#anti-zutara
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All the time, I see Elriels say that it was Clotho, not Azriel, who gave the necklace to Gwyn. That Azriel didn't even think of Gwyn because he doesn't care about her like that, and we don't even know if Clotho actually gave Gwyn the necklace. So, apparently, there's nothing Gwynriel in the bonus chapter. That's not the point!
Was it Azriel who said to give the necklace to Gwyn? No. But that's not the important part! The important part of it all is that something sparked in his chest because Clotho said she'd give the necklace to Gwyn! The important part is that Azriel could see Gwyn's eyes light up with happiness and tucked that image away for safe keeping!
What makes the bonus chapter Gwynriel is not Azriel's actions, words, or thoughts, but his feelings!
To simplify / paraphrase, this is exactly what happened:
Az to Clotho - "Give Gwyn this necklace, will you?"
Clotho to Az - "A Solstice gift from you?"
Az to Clotho - "No! Don't say it's from me, say it's from Rhys."
Clotho to Az - "Why? If I say that, it's a lie"
Az to Clotho - (now uncomfortable because he realizes it would be weird to have Gwyn realize he wants her to have this jewelry). "I don't feel comfortable having her know it's from me so if you're not comfortable with my conditions, just give it to anyone you might think would appreciate it"
Clotho to Az - "Ok, I respect your request to give it to Gwyn and for you to remain anonymous. I'll just write it's from a friend. it's going to make her really happy."
Az thinking to himself: "Gwyn isn't really a friend....but I can't seem to stop myself from picturing her joy when she sees it, how bright her eyes will become." And that thought creates a spark in him, something he wasn't expecting.
Az did want the gift to go to Gwyn, that was his intention when he first spoke with Clotho yet he got uncomfortable when she drew attention to his actions so he backpedaled. It doesn't change that she was his first thought upon arriving there.
And when Clotho was the one who mentioned how happy it would make Gwyn, I'm not sure why anyone thinks she'd just keep the necklace after all that, haha.
But you're right, it's not about the gift itself but the difference in how Az felt giving the gift to each female. When giving it to Elain, he thought only of the description of the necklace. When giving it to Gwyn, he thought of her happiness.
You is amusing about the theory that Gwyn lured Az to give her the gift? How does that work when she can't even use it to her advantage since Az wanted to remain anonymous? What good is receiving a gift you manipulated receiving if you can't even use it as a way to get your foot in the door with the person?
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Hazbin Hotel Tickle Headcannons
Enjoy your food you heathens /aff
(Part one bc word count)
Charlie
-Switch energy 100%
-Loves to tease her lee but is very gentle
-Knows when to stop or give breaks
-Has established a safe word with all hotel members
-Favorite teases are complimenting her lee
-"Aww, look at that blush, that's adorable!"
-Main targets are Vaggie and Angel Dust
-Aftercare usually consists of cuddles and a snack
-Main lers are Vaggie, Lucifer and Angel Dust
-As the rest of the hotel gets used to her they sneak in a few tickles though
-Very giggly and blushy lee
-Very easy to make flustered
-Worst spot is her tummy
-Melt spot is her wrists
-Gentle scratches there will make her very giggly and very happy
Vaggie
-Ler-leaning switch
-Only tickles Charlie
-Not good at teasing, she'll end up flustering herself
-Favors gentle tickles than wrecking her lee
-But if Charlie wants it she's more than happy to wreck her princess
-Very good at aftercare, gets her lee water and snacks and will cuddle them as well if she's close enough
-Will only let Charlie tickle her
-Anybody else will die a slow and painful second death
-Not super ticklish
-Her wings are the only place that really gets her laughing
Alastor
-Likes to believe he's ler-leaning but he's just a 100% switch
-People would think the famous Radio Demon would be above tickling
-They would be mistaken
-Since Charlie has forbidden physically harming people, tickling is a nice substitute
-He also likes the bonding aspect (but would rather die twice than admit to that, he's the fucking Radio Demon)
-HUGE TEASE
-"You're never fully dressed without a smile, darling!"
-Has no knowledge of the word stop
-He stops when he's bored or when he sees his lee has had their fill
-Main targets are Husk and Rosie BUT he's a devious little bitch and will tickle anyone being annoying/without a smile
-Surprisingly good with aftercare, typically gets his lee a blanket and water and if he's close enough he'll pull them into his lap and let them fall asleep on him
-Main lers are Rosie and Lucifer (platonically of course my guy is THE aroace icon)
-Worst spots are his hips and upper ribs
-Melt spot is his ears
-Either static-y laughter or loses his filter completely depending on the ler and the spot being targeted
-His accent really comes out when he's being wrecked
-Don't forget he's from Louisiana guys that accent is HERE AND IT IS QUEER GODDAMMIT
Angel Dust
-The switchiest switch to ever switch
-Having six arms really comes in handy (pun 102% intended)
-Main targets are Husk, Cherri Bomb and Charlie
-Big fan of cheer-up tickles
-The biggest fucking tease there is
-Beware easily flustered lees this spider talks nonstop
-"Ooooo this seems like a baaaad spot"
-Does the whole "getcha getcha getcha" thing
-Very big on consent (for obvious reasons) and will ask his lee multiple times throughout a session if they're okay with it
-Asks before pinning someone or at least makes sure they're fine with it
-If he sees his lee is uncomfortable he immediately lets up and starts apologizing
-Aftercare is very important to him, he will snuggle his lee and get them water and a blanket
-Having multiple arms is a blessing and a curse
-His armpits are his death spot and he's got six of them
-Satan help this poor guy
-Not afraid to outright ask to be wrecked
-Sometimes flusters his ler accidentally with how forward he is
-Main lers are Husk and Cherri Bomb
-Favorite ler is Husk
-Absolutely melts when his pattern on his chest is tickled
Husk
-Ler-leaning switch
-Main target is Angel Dust but will attack Alastor every once in a while to take him down a peg or two
-Doesn't do baby-talk teasing (will fluster himself if he tries)
-BUT HE DOES KNOW HOW TO TEASE DON'T UNDERESTIMATE
-"Bad spot, eh? Maybe I should stay here for a bit. You don't mind, do ya?"
-Likes to give nicknames to his lee
-Usually very gentle but will not hesitate to wreck someone if they get on his nerves (or if they ask)
-Tickle hugs are his specialty
-Most definitely uses his wings and claws as tickle tools
-Aftercare with him usually consists of a glass of water and cuddles until his lee falls asleep
-Doesn't get lee moods too often but when he does they're BAD
-Main lers are Angel Dust and Alastor
-Purrs when he's tickled and hates it
-Isn't a big fan of being pinned down so his ler will usually trap him in a hug while tickling him
-Will deny being ticklish until he's out of breath
-Worst spot is the part of his back where his wings connect
-Absolutely melts when his ears are tickled
-His tail wags and his ears flick and twitch because he's happy
-The easiest lee to fluster
-Angel found out he was ticklish during a drunk cuddle session and he had a field day
-Would sooner dig a grave and lay in it than admit to liking it
Lucifer
-You're gonna sit here and tell me this man isn't a switch? LIES
-Deviously teasy ler
-Main target is Charlie but goes after Alastor just because he can
-Tickles Charlie whenever she's stressed or upset
-Tweaks his methods for each lee to better suit them
-Definitely uses his wings as tickle tools
-Loves to see his lee blush
-"Awe, don't hide that blush, cutie!"
-Likes to give nicknames to his lee just to fluster them more
-Loves the rib-counting game
-Aftercare is super sweet and cuddly, he'll pull his lee into his lap and play with their hair until they fall asleep
-Deathly ticklish
-His wings are his worst spots but his thighs are a very close second
-Accidentally shape-shifts sometimes while being wrecked
-Main ler is Alastor (the little shit)
-Blushes very easily and cannot take what he dishes out
-Pushes at his lers hands but doesn't actually try to get away
-Melt spot is right under his chin
-Compliment teases kill him
Rosie
-Ler-leaning switch
-Helps Alastor with his ler moods but is ler 99% of the time
-Main (and only) target is Alastor
-Holds the power to say the t-word whenever she pleases and uses this to her advantage as both ler and lee
-Nibbles on her lee's belly and pretends to eat them
-Loves to tease
-"Does this tickle? Hm? I don't hear a nooo~"
-Queen of raspberries
-Tickles Alastor when he's stressed or particularly obnoxious
-Doesn't really pin her lee (Alastor usually leans into it anyway)
-Aftercare is usually letting her lee curl up in her lap as she hums a lullaby while playing with their hair
-Isn't that ticklish but if you know her well enough you can get her to laugh
-Worst spot is her hips
-Alastor likes to drill his thumbs into her hips and she absolutely SHRIEKS
-Anywhere else either gets a smile or a small giggle out of her
-Doesn't really have a melt spot but her neck is her favorite
-Only lets Alastor tickle her
-Anyone else gets eaten
I'll do the Vees when I get a chance and maybe the angels too, I'm tired and have a fanfic request to cough up work on
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i can't lie, even though it isn't as outright like elsewhere, some of the PJSK fandom even here is oddly passive aggressive and holier-than-thou about their headcanons and interpretations and whatnot to the point where they will accept no other opinion due to believing their's is 100% "right." (despite the fact that there is no right and wrong when it comes to those things.)
heads up, publicly saying stuff like "i think it's really weird when other people think/headcanon/ship [insert something that they don't agree with but isn't even problematic]" serves no purpose other than make people who do think/headcanon/ship that which you personally dislike feel bad and unnecessarily guilty.
it brings absolutely no benefit to you, only making people who dare hold a different opinion to you feel a bit shit just for having the absolute nerve to headcanon something that Their Highness RandomTumblrUser personally doesn't like!!
it's completely alright to have dislikes and things that make you uncomfortable, of course- as long as you phrase it that way. "i personally don't really vibe with [XYZ]" note that this way, you're not, intentionally or unintentionally, putting others down for no reason.
it's when you claim that others are "wrong" for having opinions different to yours is when there's an issue and you're just fucking mean.
also, main-tagging your hate isn't something anyone else wants to see, thank you very much.
#not tagging this#i'm getting a wee bit tired of passive aggressive Tumblr posts making me feel shit for shipping or not shipping certain things thanks <3#ace's rants :(
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Hiiii!
I just wanted to butt in and say how much I love your hinny fanfics especially the once’s set in hbp. (I’m not going to say how many times I have reread them, it’s too embarrassing 🙈) The way you write them, the banter and chemistry!! Honestly sometimes it feels like I’m eavesdropping on someone else conversation because you make them seem so real. I love the pinning. :)
It’s fun to read about how tortured harry is and how he feels ‘normal’ and not under so much pressure when Ginny is around! I have a suggestion if you don’t mind (ignore this otherwise and accept my apology <3). I would love to read something you about Harry pinning over Ginny while she is with Dean and see his thoughts. The monster in his chest! I love reading about the early stages of their relationship it’s so cute! Or something like that
I hope you have a wonderful day and I hope you know that your writing is spectacular!!
Hi anon!
First of all, thank you so, so, so much for this! It literally made my day! The idea that anyone re-reads my fics makes me so happy, I can't even explain 🥺🥺🥺
And now I fear I must disappoint you 😭 I've tried writing this prompt three different ways, and I can't make it work… I very rarely explore Ginny's relationship with Dean until they're broken up and there's a reason for that (I hope you're ready for some less than complimentary takes about my two faves): Both Harry and Ginny use Dean as a coping mechanism.
Ginny stays with Dean way longer than she should, to an extent it's almost out of character for her. Why? In my opinion, because if she breaks up with Dean, she has to deal with something that's increasingly staring her in the face, the fact that Harry likes her, and despite all the work she's done on herself, she still wants to drop everything to be with him. It's an uncomfortable realisation for someone as independent as Ginny.
The sheer force of her feelings for Harry is a lot for her to accept, and it's easier for her to just stay with Dean who, while nice, inspires no such depth of emotion. It's not fair to Dean, but it's a self-preservation tactic that Ginny appears to be subconsciously committed to throughout HBP.
Now, onto the reason I'm struggling to write your lovely (and appreciated) request. Harry James Potter, number 1 avoider of emotions, actually finds the Dean relationship very convenient tbh. Do you know who doesn't have to deal with their ever-increasing feelings for their best friend's little sister? The guy whose best friend's little sister has a boyfriend.
There's a large section of HBP after Harry sees the Dinny kiss (and the chest monster is born), where Ginny lingers at the back of Harry's mind (and in his dreams) but he never really consciously dwells on his feelings for Ginny. Harry isn't ready to face it, and he doesn't have to because Ginny has a boyfriend.
It's only when Ginny and Dean break up that Harry starts to panic, not that Ginny won't reciprocate his feelings, only that Ron will be mad. It's one of the reasons I love hinny as a couple… on some level they both know. Even when neither of them want to haha.
Harry never views Dean as an obstacle in canon, because really he's not (sorry Dean, I still love you). I think he probably had very fleeting moments of envy (I wrote about Harry not liking Ginny wearing Dean's West Ham jumper 😅), but I don't think Harry believes for a moment that Dean is competition (I did write him having a little crisis of confidence about Dean post sectumsempra incident in FAIY, but that's really just Harry looking for ways to make himself feel bad because of his guilt). Dean is just a convenient reason for Harry not to deal with a messy emotional situation.
Really, is it any wonder Dean smashes that glass?
Anyway, apologies for the essay, I do really appreciate being sent prompts and I wish I could fulfil this one to your satisfaction! I hope someone with a slightly different hinny interpretation than me might be inspired by it ❤️❤️❤️
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Favor(e)ite Safe-Nomming Scenarios #1
Featuring Prey A & Prey B as tinies, and Pred as a giant/big monster creature.
Warning: a more cruel/sadistic pred in the alternative endings.
Pred has swallowed Prey A and is now keeping them inside their belly against their will. So Prey B comes up with a plan to rescue A without Pred noticing.
As Pred takes a nap, Prey B manages to carefully crawl inside their mouth and descend into their esophagus thanks to a rope securely tied outside of Pred's maw. When B lands in their stomach they reunite with Prey A and gtfo, climbing all the way up to the throat without waking up Pred.
Alternative Ending 1:
Pred awakes either while B is going down their throat or as they reach their stomach; as soon as they catch up on what's happening, they decide to wait for A and B to start climbing up, grinning mischievously.
When the Preys reach the end of the mouth on their way out, Pred cuts the rope extra-dramatically with their teeth and gulps them both down again satisfactorily, only to then go back to sleep. Their lips can be seen curl into a smile before they pass out.
Alternative Ending 2:
Pred wakes up unbeknownst to Prey A and B like in the previous ending, but this time the tinies think it's safer to travel back to the top one at the time. B lets A go first in case something goes wrong. "And it will".
Pred pretends to be asleep, eyelids closed and breathing purposely slowed down as A exits the maw and now waits for B. But their turn never comes, because Pred's big eyes open and they sever the rope with the most effortless tug.
Their voice resonates in the air, accompanied by a smug smirk of theirs as they stare at A.
"What now, then?"
#this is one of my fave g/t vore scenarios of all time#so i thought “why not write something about it?” ❤️#i love all endings btw because they're all equally unique and can take on their own different paths depending on how the rescue mission goe#also even tho it've written this pred ad cruel/a bit sadistic no actual harm is caused to Prey A and B#if you feel like some tags/extra warnings need to be added pls let me know btw!!#i really don't want to make anyone uncomfortable#favor(e)ite safe-nomming scenarios series#safe vore#g/t vore#cruel pred#sadistic pred#v.ore#v0re#non-fatal vore#does this count as writing?#my writing#monster pred
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god I wish I could look up ftm stuff without being hit by an absolute deluge of detrans/pregnancy shit in the tags. I viscerally hate both of those things to the point that I mostly just don't go looking anymore because it isn't worth it. would it be so damn hard to not put those things under the regular ftm tag.
I don't blame the people with those kinks for having them mind you, it just feels really inconsiderate to be throwing your "teehee I'm a confused girl" fantasy shit directly into the faces of anyone who searches ftm tags and might already be really fucking tired of hearing that from people who are completely serious.
#considering how much work it is in real life just to get people to stop treating me like Nonbinary Plus™ it's just. must we#why is everyone's first reaction to trans men apparently to find absolutely any excuse to not refer to them as men#I mean I know why it's because we let the terfs con everyone into their whole 'the only correct opinion about men is to hate them' tripe#but still it's annoying and disheartening like no wonder I've got perpetual imposter syndrome#even my fuckin mom after I came out was like 'oh yes you know I've always seen you as more gender neutral'#WELL THAT SUCKS FOR YOU BECAUSE I'M NOT#I HAVE A GENDER. NOT THE GENDER ANYONE APPARENTLY WANTS ME TO HAVE BUT I HAVE IT NONETHELESS#DON'T REALLY CARE ANYMORE THAT IT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE NOT BEING ABLE TO SHIT ON MEN AROUND ME#the really annoying thing is that the whole 'trans fetishization' thing (WHEN IT'S CONSENSUAL) can be hot just.#not in the way these people are doing it
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You know that time in the comics when the Doctor is so depressed, he shuts off the lights, turns on an interrogation spotlight, locks himself in the console room, and argues with a bunch of judgmental shadow-figures resembling his past incarnations?
And all the TARDIS' lights go out and her interior becomes a maze to keep his companions out of the console room, all from her psychic connection with the Doctor (“moodbleed”)?
And his companions are left wandering in circles for two days as the air goes “stale,” not knowing where he is but thinking the worst, while he hallucinates in a dark room?
...because I'm thinking again about the times this definitely happened when he was with the Ponds.
#when they find him- Rory (one good nurse™) asks neutral questions to check on his emotional state while respecting his space#Amy knows when he's locked himself alone long enough to call River (fortunately Amy talks to her daughter often)#River can calm the tardis and go directly to the Doctor. she sits with him and nods when he rants. she tells him hes loved.#eleventh doctor#11th doctor#doctor who#words by seaweed#(eleventh) doctor is neurodivergent tag#honestly same. I don't want anyone looking at me when im in that way because eyes are very uncomfortable lasers slicing my thoughts#so river doesn't look at him. she looks away and lets him look at her so he knows she's not looking at him. she also does active listening#the shadow-figures in this comic are beyond psychosis coded#emphasis: it isnt presented like some conference of past selves here (which the doctor can't just do anyway- see Power of the Doctor).#and the shadow figures dont have personalities anyway. the way theyre drawn is VERY psychosis coded (as is 11 this whole Si Spurrier run)#this is from Eleventh Doctor Year 2 Issue 3 (set between A Christmas Carol and The Impossible Astronaut) if anyone's wondering#note that he put on his comfort fez I love him#alice obiefune#poor Alice got drove up the wall from wandering in the dark for two days… I think Amy and Rory get to get used to it if they're together#eventually they work out a plan to calm the tardis enough to show them the comfy spot in the bunkbeds to wait and give him space#he joins them in their bunkbed for platonic snuggles. all in the same bunk. Rory doesnt mind. they make sure the doctor knows hes loved <3#I think- having been percieved as psychotic growing up- Amy would be conscious about making sure the doctor knows she still adores him#I really want this fic to exist
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