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tojiscumdumpster · 3 months

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⠀ ⠀⠀ "unwanted" MATRIMONY

⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀byakuya kuchiki.

✧ summary to preserve the existence of y/n's clan, she is forced to wed the twenty-eighth head of the kuchiki clan—byakuya kuchiki.

✧ content warnings reader is described as a black woman who uses she/her pronouns. clanhead!reader x captain!byakuya. bleach verse au (no manga spoilers) byakuya is a noble, so they'll both be speaking as such. lowkey giving royalty au vibes. told in first POV — reader's. tropes included: arranged marriage, childhood rivals to lovers. usage of c*nt, missionary position, fingering, nipple play, praise and breeding kink, primal play, terms of endearment — blossom, my love, etc. plot with smut, fluff, and a touch of angst if you squint hard enough. lengthy, but the build up is worth it and necessary!

✧ author's note i don't have much to say, but here's to adding more bleach men to my roster. i knew i wanted to write for byakuya because that's my baby daddy, and now i finally have this idea i hope you guys enjoy. support me by reblogging, liking, and commenting your thoughts. i would greatly appreciate it. ♡ MINORS AND BLANK/AGELESS BLOGS - DO NOT INTERACT.

I must make my days do, lazing around in my private chambers as I am bound to a marriage I wanted no parts of. Especially not with Byakuya Kuchiki.

Lord Byakuya, as he prefers me to call him.

Because I am the current and possibly the final head of the L /N Clan, I am forced to complete my duties as such. Those duties entailed me following through with my grandparents final wish: get married and keep our family name alive.

Which I have no issue with fulfilling.

My dreams are filled with having children with a man that loves me. To extend our family and grow old together where our souls will find each other in another life.

However, I hadn’t planned my marriage to be an arrangement that I wasn’t aware of because of an agreement our grandfathers had prior to me being born.

It’s shocking, honestly. More so, ludicrous for them to think this was okay. But I just couldn’t deny my grandfather. Not when his palm was in mine, lacking its warmth that’s usually there due to his near passing.

I remember tears staining my cheeks and a smile gracing his when he made his final request for me.

That was two years ago. Now, I am married. Have been for almost a year and every day I dread my decision.

How could I possibly wed a man as cold as Byakuya Kuchiki? We barely speak. We sleep in separate chambers. The most we see each other is during dinner because it would be ridiculous to have the servants prepare us food at different times. But even so, the silence and tension always remains deafening.

And to make matters worse, we have yet to consummate our marriage.

This is something I cannot possibly do on my own. He may or may not be attracted to me, and I am convinced to assume the latter because he never utters a look in my direction.

It’s shameful how he treats me. The words he spoke to me the night of our ceremony is a constant memory I do my best to forget but cannot.

I’m officially married. Not the way I expected to be, but what other choice do I have? Grandfather has died and I made a promise to him to marry and bear children to keep the L /N Clan everlasting. Even if that meant being forced into marriage with my childhood rival.

As we sit side-by-side next to each other, bowing and thanking all of our guests for their blessings, I feel the coldness radiating off Byakuya. Of course, one of us has to be graceful and fake smiles while greeting everyone, so I am left to the task.

Byakuya? He doesn’t hide how dissatisfied he is with how this night is going.

To an extent, I understand. Forcing to wed after the loss of his wife, Hisana, is not ideal. Despite it being centuries since her soul has passed, I’m almost positive the heartbreak is still present.

Maybe tonight reminds him of her?

“Byakuya—what is the matter? Is everything alright?” I inquired. I turn to face him and await a response.

The squareness of his jawline catches my attention and I think how it was carved by the gods themselves. I’ve known Byakuya since we were both children, and seeing the fine man he has grown into today never ceases to amaze me.

His profile is… beautiful. I’m mesmerized by the softness of his pale complexion and how it contrasts with the darkness of his raven colored locks.

The further I stare at him, the more heat floods underneath my cheeks and my mouth watering at the sight of his beauty.

But when he finally speaks, all of the emotions I’ve felt have completely diminished.

“Do you feel no shame being forced into a marriage where your partner feels nothing for you?”

Since then, I’ve kept my distance from him. I remember the pain that pinged my chest when processing the words that left his mouth. I remember rushing to my chambers after the ceremony and crying until it felt like a million shards of glass were piercing them.

Yes, I feel ashamed. But I never expected Byakuya to be so direct with me. He’s certainly not the young boy I remember growing up with. Where we would make everything into a competition.

Our swordsmanship. Our knowledge. Our abilities. Whatever can be turned into a challenge for us, Byakuya and I competed.

That led him to be a captain of the Gotei Thirteen and twenty-eighth head of the Kuchiki Clan. And me, the twenty-third head of my family. I initially wanted to enter the Shin’ō Academy along with Byakuya, but I chose to stay with my family and oversee our medicine and agriculture.

However, even when he entered the academy, he always made time to see me because we were friends before any juvenile competition we made.

So why can he not see his wrongdoings in our marriage? Could he at least try for the sake of me fulfilling my duties?

All that keeps me company are movements of the servants coming in and out of my chambers, along with the river that flows past my view.

As always, dinner is silent.

Byakuya has returned to the manor after attending his captain duties, and this is the only time of day where I see him. He is stripped from his formal wear and has been dressed in a simple dark blue yukata that has specks of cherry blossoms scattered across the garment.

If I didn’t loathe him so much, I could take my time appreciating how handsome he looks while being in the comfort of his manor. His locks are released from the kenseikan he wears that symbolizes his nobility as the head of the Kuchiki Clan.

I occasionally steal glances at him while he eats, and yes, while I do despise being in this forced marriage just as he does, I can’t help but be captivated by him.

My lady parts wouldn’t allow me to deny the attraction.

As I watch my beloved husband, I think of all the sexual acts I would like for him to do to me. Please me in ways I could only imagine he can do. Make love to me and whisper in my ear how breathtaking I am.

When I look at Byakuya, I think of all the times I’ve spent time with Lady Kyōraku and she tells me how madly in love she is with Captain Kyōraku. How well he treats her, and even with his demands in his new position, they spend much quality time together.

She even graced my ears with a few details about a picnic session they recently had where it led to activities that typically aren't done out in public.

I wonder if my husband will ever be reckless enough to do an act as obscene as that.

Not likely.

I hate quiet, especially while we eat together. What is the purpose if no words will be spoken amongst each other? No eye contact. No going to bed together after we have finished. Why?

Why am I not able to be served dinner in my private chambers? Surely, I can make a request for this going forward.

Or… perhaps there is a different way for me to get him to speak.

I take a sip of my cremè sake before clearing my throat. “How did your day treat you, my lord?”

“It was fine,” he responds, flatly. Should I be shocked that he didn’t lift his chin when speaking to me?

“There is something I would like to discuss with you.”

“It can wait. I’m not up for discussion at the moment.” His dismissive tone has annoyance leaching onto my flesh, and I feel like I am on the verge of exploding.

“Perhaps it cannot. I would like to discuss something with you, my husband.” The authority in my voice grabs his attention and finally, he looks up at me and catches my hardened gaze.

He deeply sighs, sitting down his bowl of rice and chopsticks. “What is it?”

“Maybe we should… begin the process of annulment.”

His face remains calm. Expressionless, like I always remembered. Does he care enough to show a reaction to me asking for a cancellation of our marriage?

This shouldn’t be a difficult decision for him, so why is he taking his time to respond?

The longer I wait, the more his lack of response bothers me. It’s not similar to before, where the quiet was filled by the sounds of us eating and the servants coming in to check on us.

No, it’s the silence where if he does not speak, I will make the decision for him and walk out and permanently leave the manor.

I think of all the conversations I’ve had with Lady Rukia, his younger sister. And Renji, his lieutenant, about how I should be patient with Byaykuya. That, eventually, he will come around and warm up to me being his wife.

But how long?

How long would it take for us to share a chamber? For us to act like we’re in this agreement together? For him to look at me with the same attraction I have for him?

How long?

It possibly couldn’t be more than a year.

This is not the Byakuya Kuchiki I grew up with. No, I wasn’t in his life those five years he was wedded to Hisana due to my own family issues. Maybe I could’ve been there for him and witnessed his change that caused him to be so apathetic.

However, this cold man that sits before me… I don’t know who he is.

“Is there someone else you’re interested in?” He finally speaks, breaking me from my musings.

I draw my brows together, confused at his accusation. “Are you… insinuating that I am having an affair?”

“We’ve been wedded for a year. No acts of intimacy have been done between us. Now suddenly you—”

“Because of you!” My voice roars, interrupting whatever nonsense that he was about to spew.

I refuse to allow him to put the blame on me for the stillness in our marriage. I have tried, time after time, and all I am met with is a man that constantly rejects any type of advances I attempt to provide him.

So, I continue.

“I have given you a year, Byakuya,” I begin, standing over him. He looks up at me and again, his expression remains undetectable. “The day of our ceremony, I have accepted that I will be your lady, and on that night, I was prepared for consummation. But what did you do instead? Humiliate me in front of all our guests with your trivial question!”

My chest heaves an adrenaline I haven’t felt in a while. Maybe even never, however, leave it to Byakuya to rile me up this way.

“If you or anyone thinks I will bear children with a man that looks at me with utter disgust, then you all are sadly mistaken.” Are my last words to him before I rush out the supper room, tears threatening to fall, reminding me of the night we wedded.

I feel like such a fool. Disgrace descends upon me and my mind quickly goes to my grandfather and the words he spoke to me on his deathbed. Be strong, child, and fulfill your duties as the current head of the L /N Clan. Bear beautiful children with Young Byakuya and fall effortlessly in love.

Oh, grandfather. What am I to do? I can no longer stand to be in this marriage. Not like this.

Not with Byakuya.

By this time already, I had returned to my chambers and began preparing for bed. I allowed my emotions to get the best of me tonight, so some sleep will do me good.

But my suggestion of annulment will continue in the morning.

Just as I was moisturizing my body, a knock at the door interrupts my nightly routine and I immediately grow annoyed.

I know it isn’t one of the servants checking on me. They know when I don’t want to be bothered with. So that leaves the man that’s responsible for my current state of mind.

Ignore him, I say to myself. He’ll think I’m asleep and eventually leave. But no. He barges into my chambers, unannounced, and shuts the door behind him.

“Excuse me. I don’t recall giving you permission to en—”

“Do you think this is easy for me?” He asks, paying no mind to my protests. “Being… married to you.”

I turned my back to him and continued with the task I was doing before he interrupted. “Save me the boredom and keep it to yourself. No need to further remind—”

“For a year… I have been… fighting these emotions. These… feelings that have been forming in my chest at the thought of you being my lady.” His admission shocks me… but I remain quiet and stare at him intently through my mirror and allow him to finish. “Do you wish to know how I feel about you, Lady Y/N?”

My chest slowly heaves up and down and I hold eye contact with him. “How?” I breathed.

“You interfere with my routine. Daily… weekly… monthly. Just the thought of you has my mind spiraling.” He moves closer to me with every word he speaks. “A noble. A clan head such as myself, loses all sense of control with just a whiff of your scent. Your jasmine scent that drives me utterly insane. I simply cannot act with honor when I’m around you, so I purposely choose to ignore you.”

“But… why?” I questioned.

“Because you are you, my lady. You may think I don’t keep my eyes on you, but I do. All day… every day. I… watch you sit by the river and simply smile at the sight of nature. From a distance, I hear how kind you are when you speak to others. It’s… enchanting.”

I slowly release a breath and swallow a thick gulp. “So why is that you don’t speak to me? If I’m, as you stated, enchanting?”

“Speaking is not what I wish to do with you when we are alone,” he admits. Arousal rushed between my legs at the true meaning of his statement.

“It is hard for me to believe that you have an attraction toward me, Lord Byakuya.” As if my words triggered him, he takes long strides to close the distance between us.

“Perhaps it’s because you do not look at me the way you look at others. I, too, should be questioning your attraction toward me.”

I stand to meet with him, but fail miserably due his tall frame towering me. Still, I stand firm with my gaze. “Others such as who?”

“Shūhei Hisagi,” he deadpans.

“You’re being ridicu—”

“That smile… Your eyes… The look you give him… you have never looked at me that way before. He personally delivers the newsletter to our manor, which he doesn’t have to, but he does for you.”

“Are you… jealous? Of the small interactions I have with Hisagi a few times throughout the week?”

It is hard for me to believe that the honorable Byakuya Kuchiki himself is getting flared up over a platonic friendship between Hisagi and I.

Sure, there may be a chance he feels more for me than I know, judging by how his cheeks stain a light pink color when he delivers the newsletter.

But in no shape or form do I feel the same way, and I would never stoop as low as stepping out in my marriage. Even if my husband treats me like I am a fly on the wall.

Though, now, as he stands before me, slightly flustered, nostrils flaring, and a pinched expression—Byakuya is in fact—jealous.

I do not know how to feel about this, but I do know it is better than the distance I was getting before.

“Does this,” he grabs my hand to slip between us so I can feel his hardened erection, causing me to suck in a breath, “feel like I hold no attraction to you?”

“Byakuya,” I barely said above a hushed tone.

He presses his forward against mine, whispering, “Everyday… I curse myself for these feelings I have for you, to the point where I attempt to avoid you yet fail horribly because I can’t help but watch you from afar.” His hand gently runs up and down my arm, and this bit of contact burns warmth to my flesh.

“I feel wrong. Felt, wrong for having such feelings for you, knowing my late Hisana has passed away. I thought my heart went along with her illness, however, you returned to my life unexpectedly.”

I lick my lips before asking, “Are you saying you… love me, my lord?”

“I desire you, my lady. Crave you in ways that make me want to act animalistic.” His lips ghost over mine before he falls to my neck and inhales heavily. “I’ve always wanted to know what it is like to have you on my tongue. To hear you beg for me to give you more than what I am giving.”

“My lord… please.”

He shushes me. “Your beauty is beyond words. I have… never seen a rich, deep, golden brown complexion such as yours. You hold yourself with grace, but I know you’re a minx underneath these silk garments.”

He begins trailing faint kisses along my flesh until meeting with my face once more. I stare at him and take advantage of his ash-colored hues that resemble the sky on a cloudy day.

I don’t recall ever being this close in proximity to Byakuya. I’m enthralled by the smoothness of his skin and the color of his lips that reminds me of a thousand cherry blossoms.

I want to kiss him. I, too, also want to know what it feels like to have the taste of him on my tongue. Just—

“May I kiss you, Y/N?” The octave of his voice, slightly lower than usual, breathy with a touch of desperation… it does something to my core.

His cheeks flush red and my eyes widen at the sight of him. It feels like this is a fantasy, a moment I thought I would only see in my dreams. He is completely vulnerable, stipped down to where he forgets the formalities and calls my name. He is like this for me because of me.

When he is like this–I do not loathe him.

“You may.”

Byakuya gently presses his mouth against mine, our lips merely touching as if he is skeptical about what he is doing. He pulls back to look at me and I know desperation is shown on my face. And I know he feels the same.

How he engulfs my arm with his hand, applying immense pressure to show his desire for me tells me so.

My breaths are staggered. I’m thinking, what will he do next? Will he turn around and return to his chambers, regretting this moment ever happened? No. He does not.

He caresses my nose with his, breathing me in before meeting with my lips once more.

This time, he cuffs my face and deepens our kiss. My hands latched onto his wrist to hold him in place because I will not allow him to show any skepticism once again.

Byakuya takes his time exploring my mouth, but a touch of eagerness is shown when his tongue slips inside of me to get more. Heat hums throughout my body and I feel wetness pooling between my thighs due to the lack of under garments I am not wearing.

Is this what it feels like to kiss him? Is it normal for my limbs to grow weak? As if he read my thoughts, he sweeps me off the ground and wraps my legs around his waist. Our heads move side-to-side in unison while we devour each other’s grunts and moans.

We head in the direction to my futon and ever so lightly, he lays me down and pulls away from me.

“Strip for me.” His order is soft but filled with dominance I can’t be anything but submissive to.

I untie my silk robe, slowly until it falls off my shoulders and bares my body. His eyes… where I know Byakuya to be calm and collective during battle, right now a beast rages through him, and I am his prey that he is ready to feast on.

My legs spread, revealing my sex that is moist beyond measure. A growl forms in the pit of Byakuya’s stomach and it spreads chills down my spine.

He palms my breasts while gazing at me and I shudder from his touch. I could believe that this is in fact a dream, but it is not.

No longer than a second later, and he pinches my nipple between his fingers.

“My lord,” I softly cried, arching my back.

“You are art, Y/N.”

“Address me as your lady,” I demanded.

“Apologies, Lady Y/N.” He leans forward to press a quick kiss to my lips. “Is there anything else you would like for me to do?”

“Strip for me as well,” I instructed, teasingly.

His yukata drapes low on his hips and I am met with his slender build. Squared shoulders. A trimmed waist. And an abdomen where I would enjoy rubbing my wetness along that leads to what will bring me pleasure tonight.

He stands to completely remove his garments and my mouth floods at the sight of him. His groin, hard and veiny, drips liquid that I’m yearning to taste.

Byakuya, as expected, is well trimmed, but leaves just enough hair, perfect to my liking.

He’s much larger than I imagined. A size I need time adjusting to, that’s for certain.

“Am I up to your liking?” He quips.

I hum, tugging my bottom lip between my teeth. “Perhaps.”

The smallest chuckle, almost faint, escapes his mouth. “Perhaps…” He mocks, catching onto the lie that I uttered.

He kneels down before me and sucks my lower lip into his mouth while he widens my legs even further to bring pleasure to my cunt. Those slender fingers, so long and delicate, slip inside of me and I mewl at the slight intrusion. He massages my walls as if he is exploring, attempting to familiarize himself with how I pulsate around his fingers.

I break our kiss to moan his name, and my lord takes advantage of the opening to plunge his tongue in the back of my throat and sink deeper into my cunt.

I never expected Byakuya to be well equipped with his fingers this way. Those same fingers that are used for battle are currently being used to bring me to my release.

Soon, his lips find the valley of my breasts where he leaves bruises on my flesh with teeth. I whimper so pathetically, shocking myself at the sound that leaks from me.

He sucks on my nipples greedily, like a starved man that’s hungry for his lover, and this time, I let out a moan of his name.

“Byakuya…”

He looks at me through his lashes and firmly grips my breast. “Remember, my lady. Address me as your lord.”

“I am sorry, my lord. Please… I can no longer wait. I want to come.”

“Where is that fire that was present earlier? Begging?” I clench around his fingers at the sound of him taunting me.

He flickers his digits quicker inside of me, pulling such obscene noises from my cunt that mingles with my moans and his praises in my chambers.

Byakuya, this time, does not kiss me. No, instead, he ogles me and gently holds my chin in place where I am forced to watch him deliver me a release I’ve been waiting a year for.

There was a time where I thought he didn’t have an ounce of attraction to me, and now here he is, pleasing me in a way I haven’t been before.

“Oh, Lord Byakuya… I… I’m about to come. I feel a release coming,” I purred.

“But I have barely touched you, blossom.”

I latched onto his wrist and rolled my hips to meet his fingers thrusting inside of my cunt. “I—I know. I’ve been waiting for this… for so long.”

“You’ve fantasized about me bringing you pleasure?” I nod, causing a small smirk to form on his lips. “Tell me more, Lady Y/N. What else do you want? Would you like my shaft inside your tight cunt?”

“Yes.”

“Tell you how breathtaking you look while being filled with me?”

“Oh, yes. Yes, Lord Byakuya.”

The faintest, most gentle kiss is placed on the side of my mouth and I feel the tension at the bottom of my stomach unraveling.

“Are you prepared to bear my children? To have my come flooding your cunt until it drips out?” He ghosts over my ear. “Will you take me?”

“Bya… kuya…” My orgasm suddenly crept onto me and I’ve created a mess on his hand.

I throw my head back and moan to the gods above. I can’t stop shaking and he continues to pump his fingers inside of me.

For a year I thought this man loathed me, but tonight I am proved otherwise.

Lord Byakuya has described himself as a madman when he is around me, and it is shown when he doesn’t permit me the time to come down from my release before guiding his cock to my entrance.

I look between us, anticipating the moment he enters my body and wondering how I will take him.

He attempts to push himself inside, but is met with interference and clicks his tongue. Frustrated at the constriction of my cunt because his cock is aching to feel my walls.

“I see she is as stubborn as you are,” he taunts.

I slyly smirk at him. “Giving up—Ohh…”

Byakuya does not allow me to finish my retort before giving me one long thrust between my folds to completely stuff me. My brows knits together at the slight intrusion and hint of pain that’s mended by my wetness.

I’m… stretched. How could he fit? He’s so… big. Large. I feel his veins pleasurably grazing me when he slowly begins to pull in and out. My cunt molds around his cock like he’s all she knows and I gasp with every movement.

My thighs are pushed back so he could see all of me, to see how I’m swallowing him whole. He swears underneath his breath and seeing Byakuya so vulnerable like this has me pulsating.

“You… are amazing, my lady. This cunt of yours… It's perfect,” he declares. “For a year you have been keeping this from me?”

“More, my lord. Give me a bit more.”

“So desperate for my come, are you?”

I eagerly nod and grip his forearms to take his pounding. He wastes no time acquiescing to my request, increasing his thrusts to pull such lewd noises from me.

I’m almost embarrassed by the loudness of my dripping sex. I’m practically making a mess on my futon and I’m mortified that the servants will need to replace my sheets.

Again, his mouth and hands are back on my breast, sucking and circling my nipples until they ache. Byakuya alternates between the two to show equal amounts of love and I have never felt so overwhelmed.

He drives into me with so much passion while marking me with his teeth and alleviating the pain with his tongue.

“When I breed you, you will be completely mine, my love. You will be full of me, carrying my child,” he rasps, rutting into me with more force. “How many will you give me?”

I gasped. “As many as you want, Lord Byakuya. Just please… make me come again. I feel it approaching.”

“So come for me, blossom.”

His thrusts are harsher than before. The head of his cock repeatedly presses my sweet spot and I feel the spark of electricity tingling in my lower back. My breasts are still occupied by his mouth, but they move obnoxiously with the rhythm of his poundings.

I cry his name, scream to my lord how wonderful this feels and tears prick the corner of my eyes. His free hand that was on my breast moves to thumb my clit to aid with my near release.

Byakuya moans soon joins mine to tell me how my cunt squeezes his cock, nearly strangling. And if it were to lose circulation, I would be the cause. But does he not feel how he throbs inside of me?

How he hopes to breed me so we will be bound for life?

“You asked me earlier… if I love you. Would you still like to know?”

“Yes, Byakuya. Tell me… do you?”

“I do,” he simply answers. “Since the day I saw you staring at the river and smiling at the water flowing. How could I not love you?” He brushes his lips across mine and lowers his voice. “How could I not love you after having you like this? Having your beautiful body, every dip and curve bare underneath me?”

“Lord Byakuya… I’m coming.”

“And you sound beautiful when my name drips from your lips. Continue calling me your lord until I have filled you with my come.”

Over and over, he rocks into me at a frenzied pace, causing my orgasm to burst out of me. Tears stain my cheeks and arousal prickles my flesh from my overwhelming release. However, Byakuya does not let up until his thrusts are uncoordinated, indicating his own climax.

Coming together as lovers for the first time after our ceremony has me seeing stars in my chambers. His load… it’s heavy. Hot and sticky. It mingles with my own come and creates a mess between us.

Lord Byakuya, too, is a vocal lover. He comes down from his own release and whispers how ethereal I am. How he would never grow tired of pleasing me and filling my cunt.

But it’s the delicacy of him brushing my coils away from my face and placing soft kisses on my cheeks that causes my heart to skip a beat.

An hour has already passed, and we have been basking in each other’s presence. His embrace is comforting. It provides me with a warmth that was well needed to fill the coldness beside me when I slept alone at night for the past year.

“I’m sorry,” he says, breaking the silence.

I know the reason for his apology, but ask anyway. “For what, my lord?”

“For the discomfort I have provided you since our engagement. You didn’t deserve that… Before anything, you were a dear childhood companion of mine and I treated you horribly.”

His kind words move me. I place my palm against his cheek and look up at him. “We can discuss it some more later on. For now, I would like to enjoy your company. Is that okay?”

He kisses the top of my head and pulls me further into his arms. “Of course, my lady… Of course.”

thank you for reading. reblogs, comments, and likes are well appreciated. if you enjoy my work, please be sure to check our my masterlist for more. ෆ

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ju1cyfru1t · 9 months

Text

Y/N’s guide to a red-eared slider turtle mutant

( Rise! Leonardo x reader )

fluff :)

gn reader, romantic leaning but can be read as platonic

In which Leo stumbles across your documentation on himself.

Donnie’s version Mikey’s version Raph’s version

✧Subject of interest

Red-eared slider turtle mutant; humanoid turtle man

note: ears not visible, name is misleading.

✧ Diet:

Pizza, other Italian dishes???, chips, concrete; subject is not graceful as he claims.

✧ Likes:

Skateboarding, blue, being right (even if he is not), Jupiter Jim + J.J. Helmet, portals (⚠️DO NOT TRUST⚠️; ended up in New Jersey), stupid jokes (claims to be a coping mechanism; therapy?), to be pet and scratched???(subject purrs?), roblox, basketball, physical affection (any type; do more often. therapy???)

✧ Dislikes:

Criticism (reminder: set up appointment with Dr.Feelings?), when I’m BUSY, training?(specimens claim), sitting still (nts: will do so if watching Jupiter Jim or Lou Jitsu, or if rewarded), bitter tastes, snitches?

✧ Tail language

‼️have yet to interact with tail, turtle is too swift.

twitching rapidly: upset, annoyed, offended. possibly even embarrassed. (Typically partnered with whining) to prevent, compliment and give praise to the subject.

wagging: excited, happy, playful? (can be partnered with purring) to achieve, give the specimen full attention; review likes above.

still and loose: bored, tired, focused(?) be wary of subject when he is bored.

——————————————————————————

Leo couldn’t help the smug, cocky smile on his face. I mean, why wouldn’t you want to observe someone as amazing as him? He’ll definitely be bragging to his brothers later, and believe me, he will not shut up about it for at least a day or two.

Even if he didn’t show it, or even admit it out loud, your interest made him feel tingly and warm inside. You made him feel so loved, and like he was important and special.

He knew you would be mad if you knew he was looking through your stuff, but you’re the one who left your backpack in his room, just begging to be gone through! And when he found a file with HIS name on it, how could he resist? Again believe me, you will never hear the end of this.

And of course, he wouldn’t want you to have any misinformation…

——————————————————————————

✧Subject of interest

Red-eared slider turtle mutant; humanoid turtle man

note: ears not visible, name is misleading. That explains why you were staring at my head like that.

✧ Diet:

Pizza, other Italian dishes???, chips, concrete; subject is not graceful as he claims. First of all, not true, and second we both know Donnie tripped me!

✧ Likes:

Skateboarding, blue duh, being right (even if he is not) always, Jupiter Jim + J.J. Helmet, portals (⚠️DO NOT TRUST⚠️; ended up in New Jersey) I said I was sorry! Forgive and forget., stupid hilarious jokes (claims to be a coping mechanism; therapy?), to be pet and scratched???(subject purrs?) ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ, roblox, basketball, physical affection (any type; do more often. therapy???) Definitely do more, good note.

^ aren’t you forgetting someone on this list? ;)

✧ Dislikes:

Criticism (reminder: set up appointment with Dr.Feelings?) ＿|￣|○, when I’m BUSY being IGNORED, training?(specimens claim) I’m too good already ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ , sitting still (nts: will do so if watching Jupiter Jim or Lou Jitsu, or if rewarded), bitter tastes, snitches? Beware.

✧ Tail language

‼️have yet to interact with tail, turtle is too swift. Is this a threat???

twitching rapidly: upset, annoyed, offended. possibly even embarrassed. (Typically partnered with whining) Nuh uh to prevent, compliment and give praise to the subject. Another great note.

wagging: excited, happy, playful? (can be partnered with purring) to achieve, give the specimen full attention; review likes above. AMAZING note! 10/10

still and loose: bored, tired, focused(?) be wary of subject when he is bored. PUH-LEASE I SAID I WAS SORRY

Very, very nice observations, but they are still lacking. Please make sure to continue your research closely, I’m sure the ‘subject’ won’t complain at all.♡

——————————————————————————

Thank you for reading!!!! :D

Who’s next: Raph or Mikey??? 🤭🤭🤭

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siscon-stsg · 4 days

Note

hi, feral Satoru is jealous of his mom from his father and fucks her to remind her whom she belongs to <33

(CW: inc*st, toru is jellyyyyy. very jelly. a bit toxic actually. obsessed even!! nt* i guess? is it nt* or just cheating? idk. D*B/CON. mommy k*nk. whiney toru as always. is this ex*ibitio*ism? facef*ck*ng...literally; satoru mounts reader's face JKAJAK. ed*ing, tea*ing, overs*im, marking/hickeys, p*ssydrunk toru, creampie, implied br**ding k*nk, )

EDIT: SHIT I JUST REALIZED YOU SAID "FERAL" NAUURRR. Imma write one with feral Satoru for you baby, I'm sorry!! (this is why you don't write when you're tired bois)

ANON YOUR BRAIN ANON. YOU'RE SO----- are you a kenjaku kinnie? cuz all i see is one big brain i can make out with /jjk rizz/ ~BLOSSOM

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who loves you lots. probably way more than a son should love his mom but whatever, right? it's not like he's done anything weird yet! he's just be a tad more clingy than the usual man is to his mother but that's okay!

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who's always tried everything to get your attention on him him him, only him. he's your pretty boy, right? the only one you should look at and love cuz no one is going to be better than him anyway!

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who has the attention of all the clan, the girls and boys he could ask for. but none of them are you, his mama.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who hates when you have to attend clan matters that involve other men. he hates when you give attention to other men, period!

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who saw, one night, how is father was with you on the kitchen after dinner. his father rubbed your hip, mumbled something to you that made you chuckle bashfully, and gave you a cheeky little squeeze before leaving the room.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU whose temper flared and he realized this couldn't go on any longer, he wouldn't let him steal away his mama's attention anymore!

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who waits until you're asleep, then sneaks into your room at night.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who wakes you up with soft kissies and whispers. who caresses you with all the love and attention and praise he'd never give any other human being. he searches every soft spot, every place that gets you squirmy, hot and bothered before he's even slid his hands under your clothes.

“mamaaa, wake up,” he'd mumble, pressing slow kisses right under your ear that got you gasping. his hips made a faint rustling sound as he ground them against your clothed heat, already hard and staining his pjs. “i need youuu...!”

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who'd stroke his cock over your face, straddling your chest and cornering your head against the pillow. who'd rub the leaky tip all over your cheeks and lips, choking on his breath to not wake up his dad sleeping next to you.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who uses your face to get off. keeping a heavy but gentle hand on your scalp, rubbing his throbbing dick against you with slow sways of his hips.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who says: “m-mommy, isn't my cock the prettiest? much prettier than his?”

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who makes himself jealous just thinking about you and his dad being together, and gives you a few smack smack smack slaps on your cheek with his weeping cock that make him whimper more than you.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who makes you bury your moans in the pillow as he mounts you from behind.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who whimpers in your ear. his arms tremble as he holds you by the waist, snug and tight against his chest, hips moving in an excruciatingly slow pace.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who ends up edging and teasing himself, because he wants to fuck you so hard until you scream but his stupid dad is next to you. he steals glances now and then just to make sure he's still asleep, sometimes giving in and thrusting with enough force to make you jump on the bed a bit.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who growls from having to hold himself back, whose sweaty, toned chest presses against your arched back and makes you shiver.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who feels his ego rise to a thousand when you're melting like goo underneath him: drooling and eye-rolling on his cock that touches your sweet spots so good because it touches everything.

“y'r mine, mama, mine!” he mumbles, muffling his moans into the skin of your neck he sucks and nips on without a care in the world.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who doesn't think your relationship with his dad is even worth hiding the hickeys he's leaving on your skin. you'd be much better with him anyways!

“aww, mommy looks s'cute! you're drooling all over the pillow,” he'd tease into your ear. “y'won' wan' no one's cock 'ver again, right? right, mama? jus' me? me, me, me?”

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who quickens the pace just enough to where he can't stop moaning, and he has to bite your shoulder gently but consistently not to moan out loud.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who doesn't shut up as his orgasm approaches.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who's a babbling, incoherent mess, pussy-drunk so hard he doesn't even care if your squelching is too loud or if his pelvis makes too much noise when bashing against your ass.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU who cums so much it's a wet, creamy, liquid mess on the sheets. who stays glued to you, grinding his hips as he just keeps moaning into your ear, like his orgasm just wouldn't stop peaking.

“mommy so good... m-mommy's all mine... won't share, not my pussy...” he'd say, sneaking a hand underneath you to rub meaningfully at your tummy.

JEALOUS BABY!TORU whose breath hitches when he hears a faint, groggy grunt of your name from the other side of the bed.

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ingravinoveritas · 11 hours

Text

Just saw a post as well as a thread on Twitter about an incident that occurred at the stage door of Nye tonight and I am so sad and sickened to hear about this "fan's" behavior, both toward Michael and toward other fans. I've done many stage doors in the past (the most recent was going to see Ink on Broadway just before the pandemic) and seen a lot of entitled/unruly behavior from fans, but this woman and her mother barging into the bar, demanding a meet and greet, and then coming out and being horrific to other fans really takes the cake.

Michael works his ass off for endless hours to put on an amazing show every day/night. He gives 110% to every line, every step, every note in that musical number. Nye is a physically demanding play/role, and to get a show of that caliber from someone who is a master of his craft is more than anyone could ask for. Stage door--as lovely as it is, as fun as it can be--is not something he is required to do, especially when he's already feeling exhausted or under the weather. One thing the last several months have made clear is that Michael loves meeting fans--taking pictures, giving hugs, signing stuff, and just connecting with people. But the fact that this is not even the first time we've heard about fans going into the bar to bug him should be more than enough to give us all pause.

No one is entitled to Michael's time or attention. This particularly reminds me of an incident on Twitter a few years ago where one fan and their friends would not stop tagging Michael and demanding that he say something they wanted him to say. He'd been so incredibly giving and generous of his time with fans up until that point...and yet the second he drew a boundary, that fan and some others turned on him. Amazingly, that alone didn't put him off of engaging with the fandom entirely, but I have been in enough fandoms in my life to know that it is exactly behavior like this that will ruin things for everyone.

It also seems that Michael did come out following this incident tonight but had to leave, and he actually apologized to the nice fans who were still waiting (while apparently looking visibly upset himself). I know he apologized once before as well after a different fan went into the bar to get him, but we're beyond absurdity at this point. That Michael feels compelled to apologize for something that was not even his fault and especially after what that fan did absolutely breaks my heart, and is something that just should not be happening.

The run of Nye at the NT is nearly over, and I hope this won't put him off of doing stage door in the future (either for the remainder of this run or when it transfers to Cardiff), but I honestly would not blame him one bit if it did. What a loss it would be, though, both for the fans and for Michael...

#michael sheen #welsh seduction machine #nye the play #national theatre #why do people do this #also if anyone wonders why I'm almost hoping David doesn't do a stage door for Macbeth #this is why #i can't even with this nonsense #for this woman to then try and ruin it for other fans is especially disgusting #but i saw behavior like this in my old fandom #and it is a truly ugly thing #and Michael does not deserve this one bit #fandom woes #thoughts #discourse

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yawarakaizai · 7 months

Note

pmzai with an equally miserable s/o fem reader

ⵌ IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT

SENDER Reader (Fem) RECIPITENT PM Dazai Osamu (BSD) CONTENTS You sit and stare and wait for him to return to you. You've been bad and you've been good. There's nothing and no one that gives you purpose like he. NOTE reader+dazai are 17/18, implications of s/h, slight misogyny, death of parent, it's kind of angsty.. , soft couple, miserable couple, sui/cide mention+ideation COMPANY I'm Not Human At All

A/N ʚ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ɞ th is wa s har d to make b ecause i h ad sOOO OO m any ide as an d my playli st wa s feelin g good an d kept pla y ing song s th at g ave me diff fic ide as ;; th is is sad ,,, i do nt like sa d fics bu t ,,, this is kin d of a ven t? hehe FEE L FREE TO REQ UEST MOR E!

Your tender heart would care for an injured bunny rescued from a bear trap.

You'd nurse the animal as best you could yet it would always die.

Your father was a hunter. He earned your living costs by selling animal hide and what meat he'd have spare after covering what you'll need. Your mother died when you were a little girl.

You were as sweet as your mother.

Your father would tell stories of how She would gaze out on the winter sky and say to Herself, "My daughter will be as snow. Gentle and graceful, yet freezing to those who demand more of what perfect she is already."

When your Mother died, they put Her in a box full of pink carnations and orchids. Surely to counteract the smell of Her decaying corpse, to display Her flesh as something beautiful before her descent under soil to where Her bones will return and fertilise what surrounds.

Rural life in Japan was not for the weak. Which you were.

You picked up what your Mother left behind.

Tending to the chickens in their coops and shearing the sheep, you'd milk the cows and free the rabbits when Father wasn't looking.

Your hands plush with baby fat would clench around your rosary every night and pray like a good girl.

By the time you reached puberty, your features resembled your Mother more than ever before. Your figure changed and as did your father.

He'd sneer at the dress that fit you perfectly just two years ago. You'd become defiant and bold, a rebellious child.

" Father, but why? "

Your protests and argumentative nature would anger him. And now, you weren't a good girl.

Shouting battles always left you sobbing into thick pillows until your throat hurt.

It was at the age of fifteen did you find out what lies beneath your thin flesh and blue pulse.

You are made of bright crimson and spite.

At sixteen, you ran away.

It was impulsive. You forgot how and what happened. You don't want to remember.

Your calves ached and your feet blistered with pain from trudging up and down hills and farms.

You are a mixture of love and loss.

Everything is a blur, and sometimes you question whether running away was the wisest thing to do.

You had collapsed the moment you stepped foot into the city.

A sad, lost soul who ran away from her father.

You had been a..

" Very bad girl. "

The voice startled you enough for you to spill the batter all over your clean white apron.

" Osamu! " You cried out in disbelief, the boy laughing hysterically. " That isn't funny, knock it off. "

In a way, Dazai reminded you of those bunnies you'd rescue in your youth. He was caught and wounded by the claws of Life. And although you may cup his cheeks into your hands and tell him 'You're alive', he had already died before you were able to cradle him to your chest.

" I told you not to wake up early, Y/N! I should have known to not mention my fondness of crêpes to you. "

You felt untamed, wild hair brush against the bare of your neck before soft lips made contact with your jawline. A soft kiss pressing into what was cold. He was grateful to have you in his sad miserable life.

And even if you two were not perfect for each other, you'd both die to watch the world burn.

" I did it on my own accord. " You lied. " You did not. " He calls your bluff like air. You huff in surrender.

Setting down the metal bowl of paste, you turn to face him. You think of the horrors that his empty, black eye must have seen. His other eye, obscured by bandages, was a mystery to you. You respected him enough to not budge him about it.

" I wished to make you something special. "

You confess, certain he already knew your intention. Your boyfriend was simply smarter than many.

" I don't need anything. Coming home to you is enough, bella. '' His hand stretches to you like death.

Your eyes were not as bright as they were when you were little. They reflected the bad girl that you've become. The one that left her sickly impoverished father in treacherous conditions alone because her feelings were hurt.

" Belladonna. "

He'd pull you back into reality when he'd notice you slipping.

" 'samu. You've barely been coming home anymore, okay? Let me do this, just this once for you. " You snaked your arms around his waist and he mirrored your action, twirling you both out of the kitchen.

Dazai was inexplicable to you. He was a man your father wouldn't like. A man your Mother would hate. A man your younger self would despise.

You willingly moved into a shared apartment with the mafia executive after a few months of living in Yokohama. It was him to have picked you up from the streets. Sensing you were worth more than the muddied appearance you showed at that time.

Your one-time use turned into a second-time use, and your second-time use blossomed like a flower in Spring. You interested him.

You both intoxicated each other. Dazai was able to make you feel light. You felt weightless and as fragile as a butterfly. Weak, small and at his mercy.

" Then don't hide yourself away from the kitchen when I'm right here, love. "

By the time your spinning head focused on what was around you again, he had toppled you both onto the living room couch. He loomed over you, fully dressed in his mafia uniform, his stupid tie obscuring your vision until he tucked it between the buttons of his revere blouse.

" What would you do if I were to die? "

" Osamu. Stop that. "

You muttered.

You feel his life. The warmth of his body, the tender flow of blood heating his body as his finger traced patterns into your cheek. Your heart keeps beating.

" Answer me, Y/N. "

You didn't enjoy thinking of your partners demise. You wouldn't mind if you were to die.

The problem was, you didn't want to be alive for your boyfriends funeral, yet you didn't wish for your boyfriend to be alive for yours.

You loved each other to the point it became hate. Hate for how the other made living seem worth it.

Dazai had an eventful life. You did not.

You had no education whatsoever. According to the government, you did not exist. You had no birth certificate. You were no one. You lived hidden in this cramped apartment.

When Dazai was away, it was only you and your thoughts. Your thoughts were a dangerous thing.

" I think I would kill myself too. "

Your voice caught up on an unexpected crack. You were puzzled until your vision became glassy.

" Pretty baby. I'm sorry. " His apology was belated as you'd already begun to sniffle, he lowered his weight on you, turning to lay on his side as he pulled you in close, coaxing you into silence.

" Don't die, 'samu. Not here, not now. " Your sad little beg mused him.

Dazai was all you had left. You were most certain that if you were to part, you would die.

With Dazai, you were still inadequate. Without Dazai, you truly were nothing but a walking corpse.

He thinks that you are something weak and soft, with a fire raging in you that cried to be extinguished before it could spread.

You hush yourself to enjoy the feeling surrounding you. You feel Dazai's ribcage rise with each steady breath he takes. The beating of a heart is somewhere far deep in, and yours is jumping in your throat.

" Not now. " He repeated after you, and part of you wished to believe it.

There was something mystical about Osamu.

Something that warned you to not feed coal to the flame.

And that if you reached your hand in, you'd burn yourself on what was forbidden.

©yawarakaizai 2023 ﹒﹒ reblogs appreciated! requests open :3

#dazai x reader #pmzai #pm dazai x reader #bsd x reader #port mafia dazai x reader

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misguidedasgardian · 1 year

Text

The Winter Sun (22)

22. Rains of Fire

MASTERLIST

Summary: Your personal sacrifice is not enough to Aemond’s thirst

Pairing: Cregan Stark x Fem!Targaryen Reader, one sided Aemond Targaryen x Fem!Targaryen Reader

Warnings: Cursing, medieval and asoiaf customs, AGE GAP, Cregan is 12 years OLDER than reader), arranged marriage, incest, hinted non-con, involuntary imprisonment, non con adultery, kidnapping, a little choking, body shaming (Aemond is a c*nt, I imply Reader had chubbier hips from giving birth), death of characters, war and all that comes with it, might miss some warnings

+18, MINORS DNI

Wordcount: 3.1 k

Notes: Ufff this was hard to write. I know I have to update Dragons' mistress and the White Dragon, but I had to write this first, I was just taped to the computer writting this

Cregan hand’s shaked as he read the urgent words of his sister, his eyes filled with tears as he whined, like a wounded animal

His fist landed on the table on his tent.

He so childishly thought he could protect you, but not even an army of a thousand men could get between a dragon and his desire. He was marching to fight a war, and yet, it wasn’t enough

“How long until we reach Harrenhal?”, he asked his most trusted man, Jon, the second son of Lord Roderik

“Two weeks Lord”, he whispered shakily

“We need to pick up the pace “, he grunted, “my wife just…”, he looked at him and he straightened his posture, “she tried to take matters into her own hands”

“Is the Lady of Winterfell alright?”, he asked, fearfully, “is the heir…?”

“The heir is fine”, he said shortly, “but the Lady of Winterfell is in enemy hands”, he said shortly, "we need to reach Harrenhal as soon as we are able, and send a raven to Dragonstone for the old gods!”, he said quickly, “we are facing the largest dragon in the world!”

The man that was around his age left the tent in a hurry, and Cregan bit his bottom lip strongly, enduring the need to cry

You had been threatened and flied willingly to the enemy hands

He didn’t know Aemond in his entirety, but… he was a man, a dark man… with dark desires. He didn’t have to be a genius or a wizard to know what that man wanted to do to you

His wife, his beautiful, smart, sweet, loving wife who had fled her own home to marry him, to escape that monster, who trusted him to protect her and care for her and keep her safe.

He had failed

In a rage he threw everything he had atop his desk to the dirty ground

You threw yourself to the jaws of the dragon to spare him, he hasn't been fast enough, powerful enough, to protect you, his own wife.

And he could only pray to see you again

It had to be at night

You had manage to hide a small knife in a gartner around your thigh, but for it to work, Aemond needed to be impossibly close, and impossibly distracted and relaxed for it to work

The mere thought made your stomach turn, but it was the only way, and if it was at night, you had a better chance to escape in the night, with Vhaelar being so close

She was injured but you could hear her sing at nights, missing you, so it was clear she was ready to fly away if needed be.

You shook in anticipation, he had left to arrange some things, and left you alone to put on a very flamboyant dress and jewelry, like the one he gifted you in Winterfell. You whined, scared out of your mind, but you had to remind yourself that you were doing this for a reason, a good reason, for the survival of your family, your husband, your son, Sara, the North, all of them.

You were getting claustrophobic in this windowless room, it was beautiful decorated, yes, and the candles lit up the room and their scents prevented you from smelling the burn stone and wood and the moist of something that had never seen the sunlight, but they were there, you knew it, like ghosts

Sometimes in those hours he left you, you felt like you couldn’t breathe.

A shaky maid brought you water, wine, bread, cheeses and fruits to calm your needs, and left you without even looking at you. You knew it would be futile to try and talk to her. You knew what Aemond did, killing everyone in the castle, he probably filled it with people loyal to the Greens.

You were not proud to admit that you drank the full pitch of wine, out of nervousness, and by the time Aemond walked back into the room, you were tipsy, and on your nerves

Aemond didn’t take long to see that

“I’m sorry for leaving you for so long”, he seemed disgustingly pleased with himself, and amused by your tipsiness, “believe me when I say, I wouldn’t have left at all”

“You are here now”, you said, fighting to make it an even voice. He smiled darkly

“I am”, he took one step towards you, and you couldn’t help but take one step back, making him smile darkly

“You know why you came”, he said

“I know”, you whined, “but Aemond… I need to know…”, he was bored pretty quickly

“Get on the bed”, he commanded, and you whined

“Please”

“I don’t want to force you”, he said simply, clasping his hands together behind his back, “it will be better for the both of us if you surrender yourself to me”, he said simply, with the edge of his mouth turned upwards, in a sick little smile

“Aemond”, you whimpered.

Of course before you kill him, you wanted to see if you could convince him to retreat, but as you could see, there was no going back on his darkness

“Do it”, he only demanded. By your count, it was already nighttime, so this was it, this was the time to do it.

You walked towards him, turning off your brain and all your thoughts, and you kissed him roughly. He released his own hand and grabbed you almost tenderly, like he couldn’t believe this was happening. But then he kissed you back, taking control, his hands got rough, grabbing your arms, and then your sides, squeezing your flesh

“I‘m enjoying your initiative”, he whispered darkly and your lips left his, but he wasted no time in kissing you again, biting on your lips, making you cry out. When you realized what was about to happen, you needed to fight with yourself to tune yourself off. You needed to be in control if you were really going to go through with your plan.

So you needed to be in control.

He seemed to sense your urgency, so as he kissed you roughly he led you to the bed.

You fell on top of it hazardously, a mix of limbs and arms, but you were determined. You manage to be on top of him, and your took a sharp breath, the flimsy fabric of your dress already up your thighs

He looked up at you with wonder in his eye

This was it

And as you accommodated yourself on top of him, you looked down at his face, and he immediately could see that something was wrong, as you couldn’t hide your anger and your hate any longer, you took your hand under the skirt that was already hunched around your thighs, and uncovered the dagger

You were quick, taking both hands and raising the weapon over both your heads, Aemond opened his eye widely, his arms under your knees, he couldn’t do anything.

His heart was your aim, and as you were lowered the knife into him, he went in so slow you cursed yourself, that is what it felt like, but as you were lowering the knife with was like incredible speed, you were pulled backwards, as sharp nails grabbed you by your hairs and scalp

You whined in pain as you landed on the floor in what seemed to be slow motion, you tried to protect yourself from hitting the stone floor but your arm landed awkwardly, your leg twisted as well. You were not injured, but hurt. Something or someone kicked your hand, the knife flying over the other side of the room, and as you tried to stand, Aemond had done so, and right by your side, was a woman with long dark hairs, sharp green eyes and her face twisted in rage

Aemond could not believe what his eye was seeing

“Do you think she would’ve come freely if you hadn't threatened her?”, she asked bitterly, “she came here to kill you”

“Fuck you!”, you screamed, your nerves in the edge of your skin, you had failed, fatally

Aemond looked at the scene developing in front of him, his witch, Alys Rivers, the woman he had taken to bed to assert dominance, he could have never imagined she was the owner of a dark power, and then, the woman he truly wanted, on the floor crying in anger, married someone else and had his child, having tried to kill him after she pretended to wanted to be with him.

Even though Alys knew what his aim was -you-, she even helped him to get to you, and yet, she, as any person would be, was jealous of you, she believed she was the one Aemond should be with, should want, she could give him a child, she could give him everything you could, and more, she could give him dark powers.

Aemond soon was angry, he had lost control of the situation, he had let himself be blinded by you.

“It’s me who you should be with”, she said bitterly, looking at you still on the floor, pitifully, “it is me who had been faithfully by your side all these months, and it is me who can give you everything you want”

“Get out”, he said bluntly, taking Alys by surprise

“What?”, she snapped, still not impressed

“Get out”, he was fuming, Alys contained her anger, walking away from the room, closing the door with a surprising strength

“Aemond”, you called, scared of what you were seeing, he was very angry, enraged. He grabbed you by the neck, not squeezing but still you couldn’t breathe, he threw you on the bed and as you recuperated, he went to the door, opening it and barked orders to a soldier on the hallway that you couldn’t hear, and the he turned towards you, grabbing his own dagger from his belt

“Please!”, he threw himself on you, straddling your middle, making it hard for you to breathe but he immobilized you. “Please!”

“You are just a tricky little whore!”, he shouted, you had never seen it this angry, he was usually so contained within himself

“Aemond please don’t do this, please!”, he sliced the top of your dress and then he ripped it off with your own hands, at once you were completely naked underneath him, and then a shaky soldier entered the room, in his hands there was two thin, short chains

“No”, you whined with tears in your eyes, “NO!”, Aemond trapped one of your wrists no matter how hard you fought him, he was stronger than you in aspect, quicker, smarter…

He closed the other ends around the wooden frame of the bed.

And one you were immobilized in one arm, he went for the other , and he chained you to the bed like you were an animal

The guard left without even looking at you, but you could tell he looked troubled, but there was no time for you to concern yourself with such things, Aemond was looking down at you with a hunger in his eyes that scared you

“You are certainly looser that the last time I saw you”, he mocked, grabbing your chubby hips, you whined, motherhood certainly had taken a toll on you

“Fuck you”, you spit out

“But no matter”, he whispered, “it is still you”

“Please Aemond, it is not too late!”, you begged, “please don’t do this”

“Why can’t you see?”, he growled, “you had been mine all along, it was a mistake on my part to make you believe you had a choice”, you cried underneath him, once he realized you were tied up nicely and tightly, he separated himself from you to undo his breeches, he didn’t even undressed fully, he didn’t even get his clothes off

“Like I said, you are already married, so for now, you are my whore”, he growled, “But I will not forget what you tried to do, you tried to kill me, and your husband will pay the consequences”

“NO!”, you cried, twisting and turning underneath him, crying bitterly, “you promised”

“You have to understand, that my promise is no longer valid after you tried to stab me in the heart”

“You have no heart”, you cried, “please don’t do this”

“I could have been nice, and gentle”, he growled, “but you are more dragon than lamb, are you not?”, he teased, he released his cock, and you whimpered at the sight

“You are going to give me real children”, he whispered darkly, “dragon princes”, you only shook your head, but you had to look away as he pushed your legs open and placed himself between them

You couldn’t even look at him as you let him take you.

They weren’t advancing fast enough

Cregan thought bitterly, two weeks had passed since he receive the dark news from Winterfell, he knew Aemond had you in his power and he knew what he was capable off

They had already passed the Crossroads Inn and he knew it was a matter of a few kilometers until they could see the burn and cursed towers of Harrenhal

His army was great, he had met men in all the Northerner cities he went through on his journey South, he had a power of ten thousand men

He would siege the Castle, he knows it will take the lives of many men as Harrenhal was huge and completely defendable once you could take it, but if he could convince the Kinslayer to come and face him face to face, relying on his hate for him, he could take him in a hand to hand combat

But his plans were… mercilessly destroyed

They came at first light, storming his camp, an army of Baratheons and soldiers from the Royal army as well

The surprise factor did take them by surprise but only for a moment, as they retaliated fiercely, they were the winter wolves, the wildest army Westeros has ever seen.

The battle was brutal, mounted soldiers galloping through the tents and breaking havoc, hard tall men throwing them off their horses with axes of war hammers

Cregan, fueled by rage, cut enemy soldiers in half with the strength and power of Ice, his Valyrian sword, screaming in a rage, seeing red everywhere, the battle was soon pretty even, even though the wolves were being attacked by double the numbers

But Cregan had no space on his mind but for one thing

“KINSLAYER!”, he called, freezing everyone around him, and for his luck, or curse, Aemond answered the call, appearing through the soldiers and smoke, and destruction

“Stark”, he called back, soon they were in the middle of a circle, surrounded by men that had stopped the slaughter just to witness something that was going to be written in the storybooks

“Where is my wife?”, he asked, on guard, with his sword between his hands

“My whore is in Harrenhal, waiting for me in my bed”, he wanted to jump him, cut off his head, but he had to be smarter, he had to beat him.

“Release her, and I will march away”, he said firmly, Aemond only chuckled, his own sword on his hand, ready for the kill

“I will carve your heart out and present it to her as a wedding present”, he breathed out

“You will have to kill me first”, he threatened, putting himself in a position for attack

“After you are dead, I’m going to fly to that wasteland you call home, I’m going to take your widow in your bed, and I’ll give her my children”

“You are never going to touch her again!”, he growled

“I already did, make her bleed on my cock”, that was not true, but Cregan didn’t care as that was the last straw, with a war cry he threw himself towards Aemond, Ice on hand

The clash was brutal

Both blinded, one by power and lust, another for love and desperation. It was a fight for the ages, the single strength shown by both in their encounter made the hearts of everybody who was seeing it clench.

The battle around them also continued, each soldier inspired by their leader, soon Cregan and Aemond both got pushed around by the own fights going around them

“But don’t worry, I don’t care about that little brat, I’m going to leave it there”, Aemond teased, “lets see how long it takes your bastard sister to find him in the snow after I take her eyes”

“ARGH!”, Aemond's sword, that was not Valyrian steel, got split in two by the sheer force of Cregan and Ice, Aemond grabbed a shield from the ground, Cregan was stronger than him, but he was way faster and leaner. quicker on his feet, so he managed to dodge every heavy attack, slower by the size of the sword.

With a growl, and fighting against himself, Aemond retreated, taking advantage of his soldiers around him, Cregan tried to reach him, but his path was cut by Green soldiers

“FIGHT ME AEMOND!”, he screamed, “CRAVEN!”, but the silver haired man disappeared between his men, walking away from him.

The royal army with the Baratheons surrounded the Northmen, making them so tightly against one another they could barely move

Cregan could barely breathe, as he looked around in desperation, it was a sickening moment, in which for him, all hope was lost. Jon was by his side on a second

“My father is leading half the army to surround them, we are going to be fine!”, he managed to scream, Cregan had to believe him, but the sheer force of the attack was unbelievable, the worst part wasn't even… Cregan gasped loudly, as he watched frantically for the skies.

They had placed his camp on a valley, that was their first mistake, even though he had placed watchers on any high point around it, they had been clearly slain without anybody knowing, so they were in the worst place possible

It was moments that felt like hours, as the Northmen fought their way to make room, to recuperate ground, but they were having a hard time doing so, and that is when… all hell broke loose

“DRAGONFIRE!”, screamed another one

“COVER OUR LORD!”

“NO!”, it all happened so fast, Cregan remembered being pushed to the ground, in the reduced space, in the mayhem, in the midst of battle, someone hit him in the head, it could have been a foot, it could have been a shield of the pointless part of a spear, but he lost himself in the roar of battle.

More notes: THIS WAS INTENSE, I couldn't bring myself to write *that* scene, but still you get the picture... Don't hate me please, you know, or at least some of you know, that I'm a sucker for happy endings... hehe this isn't over yet!

taglist!

@severewobblerlightdragon @missusnora @stargaryenx @poppyreader @chainsawsangel @court-jester-stuff @batprincess1013 @eddiepicker

@lyannesworld @arujee @kamisunshine @mss-nthng @partypoison00 @grimistangel @elleclairez @may-machin @prettykinkysoul @justagurlwithships @champomiel

@laura-naruto-fan1998 @zoleea-exultant @devotedlythoughtfulanchor @zoleea-exultant @llleon666 @dark-night-sky-99 @bitchigoteverythingissues @harrypotteranna23-blog@esposadomd @ajanauia @phantomtea19 @let-love-bleeds-red @kishie8 @dreamingofyourmoons @esposadomd @sandronebabyy @kemillyfreitas @trifoliumviridi @dreamingofyourmoons @darling-jace @biblichorr @ivvypg @mendes-bae @borikenlove @tssf-imagines @praline357 @alitaar @prettykinkysoul @aelora-a @a-mexican-waffle @ateliefloresdaprimavera @alexa4040 @lrboyd @anditsmywholeheart @weaselyss @scarlettqueen190 @deeeeexx @cloudroomblog @dreaming-of-the-reality @yentroucnagol @crazymusicgirl104

#misguidedwinter #cregan stark x reader #cregan #cregan x reader #cregan x you #cregan stark #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x alys rivers #aemond x oc #aemond the kinslayer #aemond targaryen #dark!aemond x reader #dark!aemond targaryen x reader #targaryen!reader #hbo house of the dragon #house of the dragon #house targaryen #house stark

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yearningaces · 3 months

Note

werebear + nap

(and happy valentine's day!! hope you have a good time whether it is with loved ones or with yourself as company <3)

There are many benefits to being a park ranger.

Napping with a werebear wasn't one that was listed on the job description.

Oberon also wasn't a part of the job description, and yet here you were. In your watchtower, a fully shifted grizzly werebear breathing with deep rumbles while you lay on top of his warm back. Head resting on the thick scruff of his neck.

Oberon was thought to have been a wild bear that could be seen all over the park, but one glance from you seeing his burly nude form after a shift, and a few confused words later, you'd made a companion of the werebear. Said companion seemed to have been toeing the line of romantics the last few months as well.

He claimed to be some sort of guardian for the Forrest, and you couldn't really doubt him. His shifted form was somehow larger than a normal Grizzly, and even when humanoid he radiated a strange power and presence that demanded attention.

But here he was, laying on the rug of your watchtower because he stayed too late again, shifted when the moon rose, and instead of breaking the doorframe to leave, he'd decided an impromptu nap was in order.

You petted the softer fur around his surprisingly cute ears absentmindedly.

"Yre wke stl?" His baritone rumble was almost incoherent as he slowly roused to consciousness.

After a moment of deciphering his words, you responded, "Couldn't sleep."

"Why nt?" His head shifted to the side, muzzle still lazily dropped to the rug. His brown eye was open though, slowly focusing on you.

With a shrug you slip off of his back, sitting against the werebears massive hide. "Don't know."

Oberon watches you silently. After a moment, he raises his massive snout and curves his body to nuzzle his soft snout to your cheek, eyes closed, a soft noise rising from his chest. The werebear is careful in how he shifts his massive form, curling up around your smaller humanoid body, laying his head and a front paw across your lap. "Anythin' I can do?" His heavy accent ringing out far clearer in his sleepy state.

"No, no. This is nice. Maybe I'll fall asleep too." The change in position might do it, you can lean to the side into the crook of Oberon's shoulder and neck, or lean back against his side. But this is warmer, and cozier.

The werebear in question huffs lightly, nuzzling the side of his head and snout against your stomach affectionately before his own rumbling breaths even out, falling back to a blissful sleep.

This time, as your eyes grow heavy, you'd be soon to follow

#letters of yearning #x reader #gender neutral reader #monster boyfriend #monster x reader #Oberon the Werebear

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bleucaesura · 2 months

Text

STOLITZØ - TWO

“F*ck! Moxxie! Get off my a** already. Unless you want me over there on yours *wink* *wink*” Blitzø sassed into the phone as he sat in his van outside of Stolas’s.

“Ew! No! Satan’s sake, Sir! All I’m saying…” Moxxie started.

“I know what the f*ck you’re saying!” Blitzø cut Moxxie off. “See you tomorrow at work.”

Blitzø hung up the phone. He stared down at the screen.

What f*cking business is it of yours anyway, Mox? Just cuz you and Millie have the perfect f*cking marriage, don't project that sh*t like you know anything about me and my life.

Blitzø sighed, feeling a little guilty about his sh*tty thoughts towards Moxxie. Mox was a good guy. He really needed to cut the guy some f*cking slack.

Blitzø rubbed a hand down his face trying to wipe away his exhaustion. He wasn't ready for this sh*t. He looked at his phone and thought of canceling. Just dropping the grimoire on the front steps and leaving.

Just then a text came in from Loona

“Octavia’s mom is being a c*nt so she's coming over to hang. So don’t f*cking come home. Not that you do on the 🌚🍆💦. I don't want you f*cking embarrassing me”

Blitzø smiled to himself. What a sassy little b*tch his Loony was. She made him so proud.

“Huv fun! ❤️😘❤️😘” he responded. To which he got many middle fingers and eye rolls. Yup. That was his Loony. He beamed inside. Satan, he loved that pup.

He sighed and smooshed his cheek onto his steering wheel. Sulking, he looked across the van, out the passenger window to the looming doors of Stolas’s mansion.

Guess there's no backing out now.

Blitzø grabbed the grimoire, opened his door and practically fell out of his van - junk from inside tumbling after him. He walked around the van, then stood leaning against the passenger door, staring up at the mansion. His heart slamming against his chest.

Stop it you stupid f*ck. He said it was no big deal.

Blitzø felt like he couldn't breathe…

And you brushed it off like you always do. Pretended like it didn't hurt that he rejected you in front of everyone at that club.

It did hurt. But it doesn't matter. He's never cared for me as anything more than a f*ck-doll.

Then why did he come to Earth to save you? Why call you, comment on your photos, ask you how your day was, or laugh at your stupid f*cking jokes when it's not part of your contract? Maybe he does care? Even lo-

It doesn't matter! Everyone I’ve cared for or loved gets f*cked over, hurt, or dies!

Grow a pair you f*cking coward! Just TALK to the guy! Look what happened when you actually f*cking talked with Fizz. He doesn't hate or blame you anymore. You were f*cking honest and you got your best friend back after fifteen years!

That… That's different.

And Moxxie. You opened up to the little f*ck and you finally know he cares and won't leave just cuz you're a chuckle-f*cking idiot.

Mox is a tender little sh*t. He’ll forgive anyone. Except his dad I guess… But that dude is f*cked up. Anyway, Fizz and Mox have nothing to do with Stolas!

If you DON’T say anything to Stolas you could lose him and your ticket to the human world.

F*ck off. It’s not about the book. I’m not that f*cking petty.

Oh? You actually care? And yet he almost died and you weren't there.

Shut the f*ck up.

You almost lost him and you were still too selfish and scared to go see him in the hospital.

“I said, shut the f*ck up!”

Blitzø startled himself out of his panicked spiral when he realized he'd yelled aloud. He'd slid to the ground, knees to his chest, clutching the grimoire, tears streaming down his face. He was gasping for breath.

He quickly stood and brushed himself off. He looked up at Stolas’s mansion.

“F*ck it”

He wiped the tears from his face and eyes then stomped up the steps to the looming gilded doors. He hesitated a moment, remembering he was actually pretty early, then he lifted his fist to knock.

The door cracked open, Stolas’s tiny imp butler stepped back, and gestured for Blitzø to enter. When the butler gestured to Stolas’s study, Blitzø nodded politely and headed in that direction.

Blitzø liked to act like he was better than everyone, but in this place, he certainly didn't like being rude to any of the imps on Stolas’s staff. It felt demeaning. To both him and them. He felt ashamed to be served by them in any way.

Blitzø reached the study doors. Normally he would have just burst in. But today he couldn't breathe. He was nervous. His palms were sweaty. His heart was beating out of his chest.

Swallowing the lump in his throat., Blitzø decided to knock. He waited. He knocked again. Nothing.

He pushed one of the massive doors open a crack.

“Helloooo?” Blitzø called quietly into the study.

He dipped his head inside and called again. No one answered. He pushed the door open further and slipped inside.

Stolas’s desk was straight ahead in the center of the room. It looked like it filled the entire room with the golden rising staircase that led to a platform behind it. The waxing and waning of the moon was a repeated motif gilded across the desk and up the staircase.

What's with this bird and the moon?

Usually, Stolas was seated in the high-backed throne of a chair behind his desk. So it looked strange sitting there so tall, stark and empty.

I wonder where he is?

Blitzø had been in Stolas’s study before, though only briefly, so seeing it now, without Stolas’s room-filling presence felt overwhelming and awe-inspiring.

Busts and intricately framed portraits of the Goetia family lined the walls and door passage that lead into the study proper. Blitzø discovered the room itself was larger than his apartment and office put together.

F*cking rich-a** royals…

Books filled shelves floor-to-ceiling on either side. It was more books than Blitzø had seen in his entire life. Beautifully bound. Well cared for.

Stolas loves his books.

Blitzø thought back to the first time they'd met. The adorable little f*ck had been so excited about all his books. Showing them off like Blitzø actually gave a sh*t about anything he had to say then. Blitzø blushed thinking about how cute Stolas had been as a kid. And how much fun he'd ended up having that day, in spite of himself.

Blitzø smiled to himself as he reminisced and looked blankly up at the books. When he saw a shimmer of light on the spines of the books he turned to the far wall to find its source and he realized it wasn't a wall. It was a floor-to-ceiling stained glass window. It began at the top of the small, balcony? Platform? Blitzø wasn't sure what to call it. Another level of the room that sat behind Stolas’s desk that had two sets of stairs leading up to it that looked as if they were arms protecting Stolas’s desk. It seemed to serve as a platform to reach the crazy a** chandelier that hung in the middle of the room.

As Blitzø’s eyes trained up on the chandelier he almost stumbled and fell backward when he saw the chandelier led up to what he - at first - thought was the night sky. It took a moment for him to realize it was just a painted ceiling. Constellations and the deep blue of space. Blitzø crossed to Stolas’s desk in awe, transfixed, never looking away from the ceiling. He felt like he was falling into the beautiful void of space.

Is this what Stolas does? He said he studies the skies and their prophecies. He never said it was this beautiful.

Blitzø stood in wonder. He began to feel small.

He's so important. To be in charge of something this beautiful… So f*cking powerful.

Blitzø hugged the grimoire tightly to himself like a shield. Remembering Stolas’s rescue and his full demonic manifestation. Blitzø had thought he was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. But he'd been terrified at the same time. Not of the fact that Stolas could hurt - even kill - him easily with his power. No. It wasn't Stolas’s power he was afraid of. Blitzø was petrified of how Stolas had made him feel. Safe. Wanted. Worth saving.

How the f*ck could he care for scum like me? When he has all of this?

And then Stolas had rejected Blitzø in front of everyone.

He's ashamed of me. His dirty little f*ck doll…

Tears welled in his eyes. He fought them back as he tore his gaze from the ceiling and the infinite beauty and sorrow he'd found there.

Blitzø’s eyes slammed shut in pain as he remembered Stolas’s tail feathers passing by overhead. The gurney. The hospital. The crowd. The shouting.

“Stolas got hurt bad.” Millie’s words rang in his ears like an echo in a haunted well, beckoning him into its depths.

“He can get hurt?” Blitzø had heard himself say. He’d felt like the earth beneath his feet was sand slowly trying to pull him under. Nothing made sense anymore. Stolas is Goetia. Goetia don’t get hurt. Goetia are basically gods. Weren’t they?

What did I do? Stolas is really hurt. I should have been there. He called me. ME. And I blew him off. I could have rescheduled Loona’s appointment. The f*ck was I thinking?! Oh f*ck. F*ck f*ck f*ck!

Blitzø’s heart hammered in his chest. Remembering that day and every day Stolas had been in the hospital ripped at his heart.

Stop it. Satan f*cking dammit. Get your sh*t together you stupid f*ck. You decided to talk to him so you'll f*cking talk to him you f*cking p*ssy!

Blitzø pried his eyes open and took deep measured breaths trying to calm himself. Once he’d gained his composure, he released the death grip he hadn’t realized he’d had on the grimoire and took another quick look around the room to see if there was anywhere Stolas could be hiding. Or maybe reading and too involved to notice his surroundings.

Blitzø chuckled to himself remembering the times he’d scared Stolas because he’d been too beak deep in one of his books to notice Blitzø sneaking up on him.

But no. Stolas really wasn’t there.

Blitzø stood by Stolas’s desk wondering what to do. Stay there? Go look for him?

Then something caught his eye. A box.

The f*ck is that?

Blitzø looked about the room shiftily. He checked the door to make sure no one was coming. Once he was satisfied, he tiptoed around the desk to get a better look.

It felt strange being on this side of Stolas’s desk. In a strange way it made him feel both smaller in station and yet closer to Stolas.

Blitzø tossed the grimoire on the chair and heaved himself up onto it. For a moment he just sat there. Feeling smug.

So this is what it feels like.

Blitzø ran his palms along the edge of the desk, feeling the richness of it. He felt unworthy.

Sighing, he turned his attention to the box.

There, in the middle of the desk, sat a beautiful blue box. Blitzø reached for it but pulled back abruptly like he’d been stung.

Is that?

Blitzø’s heart began to race as he reached out a shaking hand and picked up the box. He traced the glowing sigil that adorned the lid.

Asmodeus…

Blitzø’s ears began to ring and the whole world dropped away as his vision tunneled on the box in his hands.

He could hear Verosika whispering in his ear, “I told you what this is.”

Blitzø gulped, hands shaking, cold sweat dripping down the back of his neck.

“You know what it does” Verosika purred with venom.

Blitzø slowly opened the box’s lid.

Please don’t let it be… Please, no…

Blitzø’s eyes stung with tears as he looked down at the Asmodeon crystal nestled inside the silken lined box. One of the Lust Demon Lord Asmodeus’s all-access passes to the human world. Usually reserved for his succu-b*tches to do their lust-sucking work on the humans. Stolas wouldn’t need something like this to traverse realms - Blitzø had seen that himself. That meant…

Verosika cackled “Oh you pathetic f*ck! You know what it means! He’s done with you! Throwing you away like the trash that you are!”

Blitzø shut the box, slamming it onto the desk.

No. No no no no no… This can’t be right. We have a deal…

Blitzø started shaking. He gathered himself onto the chair, trying to make himself as small as possible. He wrapped his tail tightly around himself and looked up at the ceiling as tears stung his eyes.

He doesn’t want me anymore. I can’t believe I ever thought… and now he’s just f*cking throwing me away.?

“No…” Blitzø whispered as he stared wide-eyed and unblinking at the ceiling; letting himself be swallowed by the void.

*****

#helluva boss #stolitz #blitzø #stolas #fanfic #vivzieverse #vivziepop #vivienne medrano #brandon rogers #helluva boss asmodeus #verosika mayday #helluva boss stolitz #stolitz fanfic #stolitz angst #helluva boss fanfiction

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pixiemage · 9 months

Text

I deal with ADHD on a daily basis, meaning I struggle with multiple (frustrating) things. There's one in particular that's been on my mind the most as of late: it's difficult for me to complete large tasks easily. For me, motivation, mental energy, and time are limited, and those rare moments where it all lines up so I can get shit done are often few and far between. This applies to both things I don't want to do, and things I do want to do. Even writing or cosplay construction or editing videos can become daunting tasks even though they're all fun and enjoyable hobbies of mine.

Recently, I've been trying to clean my room.

As anyone in my immediate family can tell you, this has been a big problem since I was young. My room starts clean, but then I put a few pairs of shoes by my bed, then don't have the energy to deal with the growing laundry pile, then can't find a place for the new mic stand I got for my birthday, then I start dumping jewelry on my bedside table at the end of the day when I'm tired, then - then - then. And then it builds to a disastrous tipping point and it has become this massive, incomprehensible task I have to tackle, and because my brain hates me, it's a frustrating and grueling process to even figure out where to begin.

But deadlines help (pressure helps) and I have found that working on it in the wee hours of the morning (from midnight to like 5am) is somehow a way to get my brain to focus on it. For some reason I work better then. Arguably, this isn't logical or useful every day because I need sleep and I have work, but I made MASSIVE progress two days ago by staying up way too late on a night when I finally found the drive to get shit done.

That's not really the point of this post though.

The point is that I've found that a majority of society (or maybe just the NT community in general) have a hard time seeing progress as worthwhile when completion is better.

"Did you finish your room?" "Not yet, but I dealt with that massive pile of crap on my couch! It's SO much better, and I can actually see the floor in front of my dresser now, and-" "That's not what I asked. Did you finish?" "Not yet." "The answer is no, then."

It doesn't matter how much I've done. It doesn't matter how proud I am of my partial progress. It doesn't matter that I fought tooth and nail to get to the point I'm at, because unfortunately, I haven't finished it all yet, so it's not good enough.

(And I know I have a deadline, and I know we have family coming over soon, and I know that being done is the goal, but the deadline isn't here yet. Give me time. I need time.)

I think we as a society need to award and praise ourselves more for the efforts we put in, whether we reached a finish line or not. I'm not saying we shouldn't strive for completion, because at the end of the day that's often the goal of any task. But we should also let ourselves be proud of how far we have come as long as we're doing our best. I don't see that often enough. I continuously struggle to reach that finish line, but hey, I came this far today! I didn't reach Toad so he could tell me my princess was in another castle (because god knows there's always another task), but I did hit that checkpoint, and since I've been struggling through this level for as long as I have, that's still worth celebrating in some small way. It's still worth all the coins I collected and the goons I defeated to get to this point.

Don't reprimand your kids because their hard work thus far doesn't quite live up to your standards. Applaud what they've done and then help them find the right next step so they're motivated to keep going.

It takes a lot of work to save a princess. The journey has a lot more monsters than just the dragon.

#ADHD #Actual ADHD #ADHD Experience #Executive Disfunction

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i4bellingham · 1 year

Note

So I read “misleading” tic abt Jude and I LOVE IT!!! I have kind of a similar request with Jude. Soo I was thinking, Jude, y/n, and some of the guys are out clubbing or out in a bit or somewhere crowded and then a guy approaches y/n and tries to get her to come with him, like pulling on her and grabbing her. And then Jude and some of the guys come and stoops him and it’s almost like a fight and Jude gets really protective. Then someone films it and it’s ALL over the internet ( you can ignore this I might have just gotten carried away)

PROTECTIVE : jude bellingham x reader

cw: a guy being a fucking creep 🤢, protective!jude, literally jude in this fic will not take a piss from anybody, cussing, shoving resulting to a near fight, will take place after world cup where the guys are out in a club to party and celebrate before returning to their own clubs, also protective!england nt bcs jude is their baby, the creep being socked. switches in povs !! + not proofread !!

The nightclub was mellow but overflowing with a bunch of attendees.

It definitely wasn’t your every evening scene but it was a place you’d visit on occasion and by on occasion, it means being dragged and pestered by your friends to go with them some time every once or thrice a month.

But even then, you'd never once experienced something that threatened your occasional visits to the clubs. Normally finding friends amidst the rowdy crowd and entertaining drunk yet very amusing discourse with said people.

Your nightclub trips weren't a scary experience, until now.

“A pretty girl alone in a place like this?” The overbearing scent of bergamot filled your senses, nearly enough to make you feel suffocated by the scent alone that overpowered the entire smell of the nightclub itself.

It was due to the proximity of the unknown guy beside you and you confirmed that when you turned your head to the right and seeing an unfamiliar face; a guy in his late 20’s you presume, a dark haired male with a pale complexion and with a salacious grin staring you down.

Taking notice of a palm's worth of space between the both of you, you automatically scooted away from him with a nervous chuckle, sounding awfully lot like you're having a coughing fit before your drinks are being slid across the marble counter by the bartender who, also got an eye out for look-out.

“Oh. I’m actually here with my boyfriend and his friends.” You emphasized, hugging yours and Jude’s drinks near to your chest before tipping your head a bit as you slowly walked away. “Uh... yeah, bye-”

“Let me take your drinks to your boyfriend and his friends...” The unknown guy tried to take the glasses from you, not even minding one bit but it was near your clothed chest before you're stepping away from the guy, an uncomfortable frown on your face.

You glanced at the bartender, seeing him occupied with another customer's rather large batch of orders before sighing out loud, plastering your fake, friendly smile at him. “No thanks, I got it.”

Now without bidding him any farewell, you successfully walked away and only then did you began to chastise yourself for taking the drinks alone, especially when Jude made it perfectly clear that he could've gone with you.

But you didn't let him, not when he’s got a few fans to entertain himself alongside his mates. The other guys were there with you upon arrival as well but they gradually left your table not even an hour after you got there. You were also hesitant to ask one of the guys' girlfriends to go with you even though you knew that they wouldn’t mind coming with to get the drinks with you. You were simply hesitant to do those and hence you went alone.

And look at where you've landed now.

With a deep sigh, you continued walking the path to your table. You can already see Sasha's blonde hair up ahead and Marcus’ tall frame when an arm suddenly was wrapped around your shoulders, nearly making you drop the drinks on the ground.

“Hi again!” The unknown guy cheers beside you, almost shoving his face against yours before he's gripping at your shoulders. “Thought you might rather prefer some other company. A friend of mine just bought more drinks and I think you could come and join us for some fun-”

You push the guy off of you, scrambling to get away from his grip that the drinks you tried so hard to keep drenched the front of your dress.

“Please just leave me alone.” You place the glasses on a nearby vacant table, wiping away the liquid that soaked the material of your dress with your palm. “You’re really really making me uncomfortable so I would appreciate it if you just leave me alone, please.”

“But I'm already being the kind lad here! Offered to carry your drinks, asked if you wanted to join me and my friends at our table and yet you keep on being a brat and refusing my offers-”

“You also touched me without my permission, overstepped in my personal boundary and made me feel disturbed.” Tears pricked at your eyes, as you stepped away, a palm out to keep the guy from coming closer. “Please just leave me alone-”

“What’s happenin’ here?”

A familiar weight settled on your waist, wrapped nice and snug before you're being hauled against Jude's chest with a protective arm around you.

Jude tilts his head to look at you, worry crossing in his eyes noticing your lack of verbal response and your refusal to meet his gaze.

“Love? What's wrong? What happened?” He gently asks you.

You shook your head against his chest, muttering a few simple words that was enough for Jude to hear.

“Let’s just go back to the table, Jude please...”

Jude’s jaw visibly tightens before he's glaring at the unknown guy, guiding you back to the table with his arms still around you.

The two of you nearly made it to the table when a grip on your wrist pulled you back and making you let out a surprised shriek as the unfamiliar guy wrenched you harshly against his hold, the tight grip sending a throbbing pain through the entirety of your hand.

And not even a second later after that, you were free from the unknown guy’s clasp before Jude’s shoving him to a nearby table, alerting the other guys from your booth because of the fallen glasswares.

“Keep your hands off her you bloke.” Teeth grinding and jaw clenched, Jude balls the guy’s collar in his fists with a harsh glare. “If I see you lay a single, dirty finger on her again, you just mighta go home with a broken hand before this night ends.”

Pickford rushes over and wraps an arm across Jude’s chest, pulling him away from the stunned guy before Wilson and Saka steps in to help their mate haul your trashing boyfriend away.

Jack and Mason stood before the guy, glaring and tensed as they stare the man down before Sterling is guiding two bouncers on the scene with Jesse on tow.

On the other hand, Declan and Henderson are ushering you back to the seats, noticing Trent and Marcus on the booth with the other girls present for the evening, worry creasing their faces.

You glance to where Jude and the three other guys were just a while ago, seeing them nowhere near the spot. You roam your eyes around the area before Declan speaks up beside you with a comforting pat on the shoulder.

“Don’t worry about Jude, they took him outside to get some air. They’ll probably be back in a few minutes or so just until Jude cool downs.” He tells you and you silently nod your head, still looking over the last spot where you saw Pickford, Saka and Wilson calm your boyfriend from bashing the creep’s head on the table.

Trent leaves his spot in the booth, making you sit down beside his girlfriend Hannah who immediately asks if you're okay. It then probe the others into asking you the same question, with the exemption of Tolami and Lucia who simply offered you a glass of water and with an encouraging pat on the hand, refraining themselves from overwhelming you as they kept the questions to themselves.

Your answers to their questions were short and concise and it didn't take them long to realize that you would probably want your space after what happened. They simply shared looks of both worry and sympathy and with a few shorts hugs being offered to you, they simply sat in silence and waited for the others to return.

The waiting time didn't take long because after sitting down for 10 minutes, Jack, Mason, Raheem and Jesse are walking back to the booth. The four of them asked if you were alright, Jack going as far as joking about socking the guy in the parking lot after your group leaves to which not only did Sasha reprimanded him for, he was also smacked by the other guys for finding his suggestion too much despite feeling absolutely enraged by what happened.

Jordan, Saka, Wilson and Jude came back after 20 minutes, your boyfriend immediately crouching down in front of you and taking your hands in his before he’s got his forehead planted on your thighs, a shaky breath leaving his lips.

“You guys were out for long. What happened?” Jesse asked with a questioning brow raised.

Wilson who was seated on the opposite side of the seating arrangement grumbled something in response.

“The guy went to the parking lot after he was escorted out of the club, we were there, Jude saw him and tackled him on the ground after hearing the maggot say some things.” Wilson sighs but there is an amused smile on his lips. “Landed a rather lousy punch on the guy’s face when Jordan had his punching hand pinned back.”

“Should have brought him in when the wanker went out, no?” Sterling comments. “Let’s just hope this doesn't reach the internet.”

Marcus nods his head. “The PR team's most definitely gonna be pissed if that were to happen...”

“Well the nutter's the one who started it.” Trent piques with an eye-roll. “Would’ve socked him on the face the moment I saw him.”

Henderson shakes his head, ignoring the scoff from Trent as he shares his comment. “That’s why we didn’t let you leave the booth.”

“You’d jump on the poor nutter.” Mason chimes in, earning a fit of laughter from almost everyone.

As you tune down the conversation happening, your eyes landed on Jude's knuckles beside your thighs. They weren't busted open but they were bruised, discoloration already forming around the skin of the knuckles he used to punch the guy with.

You ran your fingers through his hair, leaning down to whisper against his ear as he continued being crouched down, head on your lap.

“Jude? Are you alright, love?”

Jude nods his head with a hum.

“Can you sit down beside me please?” You pat the empty space beside you. “You’re gonna get leg cramps if you remain crouching down there.”

Jude doesn't say anything else but he does comply, silently sitting down beside you with his head hanging down low.

You place a hand on his thigh, pursing your lips as you observe his slouched figure nearly draping over you.

“What’s wrong, hmm?”

He doesn't speak for a while, eyes following the circles being traces on his lap before he’s clasping your palm against his, grip not too tight but enough for you to feel the strength of his hold on you.

“Are you alright?” Jude asks, turning his head to look at you better. “I’m sorry I couldn't be there to help you earlier. I feel so angry and upset that you had to go through that. No one, not especially a woman should ever go through something as traumatizing as that and it happened to you.”

He heaves a deep breath, leaning his head against the tall cushioned back rest of the booth. “I felt so angry at myself when I saw you were almost crying when I got to you. Realized it must've been a little while when the scrub has been buggin’ you ’n I wasn’t there to keep most of it from happening.”

Jude purses his lips, muttering two words underneath his breath as if he was afraid for everyone, for you to hear the fragility and hurt in his voice.

“I’m sorry.”

Gently, you take Jude’s hand and raising his bruised knuckles to your lips, softly kissing the discolored spot.

“That wasn’t your fault Jude. It was something that we all didn’t expect to happen so please don’t take the blame for what happened.” You told him, watching as he knits his brows, closing his eyes. “Just like what you said, nobody should ever experience something like that and we only have those kind of people to blame. But thank you, for protecting me and for standing up for me the way you did. I would have never known what I’d do if you didn’t came by and helped me-”

“Of course I’d protect you. Girlfriend or not I will always protect you...”

Jude leans in and plants a kiss on your temple, pulling a hand away from your touch to wrap at your waist.

“I’d go mad if something happened to you.”

“Mhm and that’s why you socked the guy on the face right?”

Jude chuckles, kissing your cheeks and playfully biting at the skin. “Could've done a better job at punching him but my arm was restrained.”

You were about to open your mouth to respond with something when Jude’s phone rang, interrupting whatever comment you had to yourself before he’s fishing the device from his pockets, eyes rolling seeing the name in the caller id.

　　　　　　　　　　ㅡ

　　　　　　　Incoming call...

　　　　　　　 PR manager

　　　　　　　　　　ㅡ

a/n: i am not entirely satisfied with the ending but will revise it whenever i can! also posting this because jude posted a selca on his ig story 😍

#☆ i4bellingham writes.#☆ jude bellingham #jude bellingham #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham fanfiction #jude bellingham x fem!reader

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