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datrb · 4 months

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2023 art review!

Even if this year wasn't the biggest on art, due to my physical condition (especially in last couple of months), it would still be nice to look back on what i did as an artist throughout it!

This is gonna be a fun ride...

So, let's dive straight into it, shall we?

Continuation under the cut

January

2023 started on a high note, with me just having finished the King piece, and moving on to the next big thing, being an AvA3/5 double piece.

Sadly, during the process i messed up big time which led to me being unable to finish the piece the way i wanted to, rendering this project an eternal WIP. However, i still cherish the idea and do wish to either redraw, or complete it.

February

Doing 2 big projects one after another did end up affecting my overall drive, so i spent majority of that month just making sketches.

First one is a little redraw/redesign of my old character - Derek, whom i used for a roleplay with my friends like 3 or 4 years ago, and second one is Deach, a character from my fantasy setting.

Also, back then i joined a new fandom, people in which have reminded me of my admiration for SCP, after which me and my friends proceeded to make OCs for it. Was a fun time! (Also this access card was sold by me as a YCH, sadly i couldn't really find buyers, so yikes)

March

By march is slowly started recovering from january's disappointement and was a bit more productive already. One of my friends really helped with it too.

A musician friend of mine reached out to me, asking to develop a design for a villain character in the plot he was working on. After listening to the theme song i couldn't resist. This ended up being one of my favorite designs so far, and i adore its look in neon.

In the meantime, i kept working on my fantasy setting, refining more minor details of designs and stories, yet having to reserve only to making sketches as i was too busy with college and other projects. Characters you see on screen are Ian and Lanfor respectfully. One is a strong yet troubled mage and other is a great Emperor, and even better person.

April

I'd say april was one of the most productive months of this year, mostly because i managed to snatch some time for myself and my setting, which allowed me to complete two full pieces and achieve some extreme progress with my story.

This piece is an illustration to a scene i wrote for two of the characters, Lanfor and Emile, called "Night Visitor". This was a scene of a reunion of two old friends. A bittersweet, yet a lovely work. Love both the written one as well as the illustration.

This one was more of a... Proof of concept. Needed to test out the expresiveness of the design for one or a relatively new characters - Covlar. Was originally a simple sketch on paper, but i couldn't resist the urge of making it into a complete illustration. I then proceeded to make a few notes for this scene. Both want to write it properly and avoid it at all cost... Best to avoid it, for my own sanity.

May

May was a bit of trainwreck, because i got a brand new laptop, which took me quite some time to get used to and even more time to reassure myself that it is in fact alright for me to draw on this suspicioiusly thin piece of tech.

Ironically enough, the only vomplete piece i drew that month was drawn on my old laptop. This screenshot redraw was to made to honour the premiere of AvA6 ep.1. Sadly, i did it a bit late because fo technical issues, but i still had a ton of fun doing it.

June

June was... Chaotic, to say the least. Mostly because i finally got comfortable with the new laptop and could now draw a lot more freely due to it being a lot more compact than the original one, which worked almost like a PC. Besides, i got a ton more free time because semester finals ended up being a breeze.

Ended up making a ton sketches and doodles, that i didn't actually plan to finish, but still enjoyed a ton. Here are some of them

Then, ofc, the memes and the gand redesign, because AvA6 just had to break all of my portrayals. But, i mean, after AvM s3 my original designs did become a bit dated.

The biggest pride and saddest of failures was this picnic piece, however. I still plan on finishing it, but it is hard doing so, when i have changed quite a bit of my artstyle by now.

July

July was quite lazy. Semester ended and i spent that entire month out of the city. It was a great time, very peaceul indeed.

And again, that musician friend from before came into clutch, asking me to develop another design for his other project. And again a villain. He said he really liked how i draw bastard type of characters.

August

Well this is where fun began. End of summer break means i have just this much time to actually draw something i would never have time to draw normally.

For me to draw something to commemorate a new episode is almost like a tradition at this point. And, given how long it's been since i made anything that would require effort, no wonder i have chosen arguably the most complex piece to pull off energy-wise. Yet i did and now i simply adore this piece, even if it did render me disabled. (I crunched through all of this piece, pulling off 40+ hours of work in just 4 days, so naturaly it ended up worsening my condition by a lot)

Then i also proceeded to do all of these tiny side projects, like Victim ask, which i couldn't last long at due to my condition, and working on a design for my favourite streamer. (Which i cannot show as the work is not complete an it's best if i avoid spoilers)

September and October

These two months i spent being unable to draw at all via a doctor's advice. Arguably, these two were the hardest months for me to handle.

I assume you can imagine how hard it is to suddenly stop being able to do what you love, regardless of how much you wish to do it.

Novemer

*Nervous laughter* I... actually still wasn't allowed to use my hand, but that didn't stop me and i ended up making an entire series of sketches to celebrate AvA6 ep2.

"Small in big quantity will sure be less exhausting than a single big thing" - (C) Me, proably

I will admit, i still adore all of these sketches and each of them deserves to become a fully fledged piece in it's own right, but i really better keep them as they are. For my own safety.

December

As you way have expected, this month will stay without a single thing from me. It's not because i don't want to, but because i can't. And, given the circumstance, it better stay that way.

Afterword

I finally got my diagnosis and soon enough i will start active treatment for my condition. It would be a shame to make this worse than it already is with impulses like those that happened in november, so i am making this post as a way to draw a line for myself.

It is still kinda crazy to realize that there are quite a few people interested in what i make, so i will make sure to take my recovery as responcible as possible, and then come back to you with even more art in the upcoming year! Let's be positive about it.

#alan becker #animation vs animator #ava #illustration #ava fanart #animation vs minecraft #avm #artists on tumblr #2023 art #yearly art summary #oc art #original character #digital art #No character tags because there are too many of them

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squeakygeeky · 10 months

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Language Learning Check-In: June

Assuming I keep up with this I guess I'll make this a monthly thing. I've loved languages for a long time, but this was the first time in a while where I felt like it was my main hobby. I'm currently very into the idea of 'comprehensible input' which is where things are simplified enough and with enough context that you can understand what's going on, even if you can't understand most of the words, and you naturally start picking up both grammar and vocabulary from exposure. I finally quit Duolingo cold turkey.

Thai: I started seriously studying Thai at the end of last month, starting with learning the alphabet and then immediately abandoning that to do pure listening comprehension only. I've been averaging 2hrs a day, a pace I can probably stick to for the next two months since I can watch videos during work, but not after that. This is not counting time spent watching BL since in that case I'm focusing mainly on reading subtitles, although I'm sure it helps a little. The videos I'm watching have the format of two teachers asking each other basic questions ('Is this a fruit? Do you like to eat this?') with lots of repetition, hand gestures, and doodles to illustrate.

I feel like I've been learning so much but all I can quantify is the hours spent since it's not like I'm making vocab lists or taking tests, I'm just absorbing like a sponge. My favorite part is that it's pretty chill to be a sponge so it's still possible when I'm tired, and until this past week or so I was struggling a lot with my energy levels. I don't really have any fun language facts to share other than that sky blue is its own distinct color category, there's no overall blue in Thai.

Spanish: I'm actually part of an insanely multilingual friend group now and there are a lot of Spanish speakers. This includes the friend I've been calling 'Kdrama Friend' who is actually a Spaniard, although her mother tongue is Catalan, not Castilian. Then there's my Guatemalan neighbor of the Mysterious Doormat Beverage (left on my doormat, not consisting of doormats), and a few other women. Kdrama Friend can translate (and so can some of the others, they mostly speak more English than I speak Spanish) but it's a lot less awkward when she doesn't have to. I do struggle to follow group conversations a lot of times though, so I've been meaning to seriously work on my conversational skills and now I've actually started.

It's easier than with Thai in the sense that I don't have to have visual input, I can understand intermediate to advanced podcasts like the Duolingo podcast and even native podcasts, but it's harder in the sense that I don't feel any progress since my level was already pretty high and I'm just picking up the occasional new word. We'll see how I do at tomorrow's baby shower. To be honest I think a lot of my problems with conversation are more psychological than linguistic and exist even when I'm speaking English, I can just cope better then.

I found a podcast on fashion history which I was able to follow because I'm actually really interested in that. It's the whole comprehensible input thing, I know perfectly well what a toile is and have used them, but someone at my Spanish level who didn't know how to sew clothes might have been lost.

Working on Spanish doesn't feel that exciting but it's useful and important to me for heritage reasons. If you've ever read the Josefina American Girl books, that's exactly one side of my family and my grandma grew up speaking Spanish, but my dad's Spanish is almost nonexistent and I just learned in school.

Vietnamese: You all know I love this language and I've wanted to learn it for a while, but there aren't great resources for it and while I can absolutely pick up certain words and phrases, it still kind of...doesn't sound like a language a lot of the time. Thai already feels more understandable. I think the alphabet similarity is actually hurting me because if I look at a word the way it would sound with English pronunciation interferes too much, and there aren't any videos simple enough to feel comprehensible without any translation. So this is on the back burner.

Korean: Dropped for now, although I did find some comprehensible input videos in case I decide to try learning it later.

My problem is that I now want to learn all the languages, right now, and that is not how it works. Anyway, feel free to ask me about languages any time.

#i haven't even gotten to my filipino friend who briefly taught english on a remote island in siberia #or the time kdrama friend 'translated' for our nepali friend at the doctors but she was just repeating everything in simpler english #its multilingual chaos over here #squeakygeeky learns thai

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heavenfell-au · 2 years

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Man, feels so bad that for the past two years, I’ve been struggling with pain in my arms. Did I tell you guys that I went to the chiropractor in... June ? For the second time and he just found the underlying issue which was MY TENDON OUT OF ITS FUCKING SOCKET ???? For two years I had this pain and no fucking doctor or specialist figured that shit out.

Now I’m dealing with a very stubborn tendinitis, now that my cervicals are doing much better thanks to my life savior the chiropractor, I’m sitting here upset at myself for being unable to work as much as I want, if at all... I’m so slow because of that arm that doesn’t want to get better. It just feels like I’m letting everyone down and myself because I can’t provide more content...

So huh yeah. Things are somewhat better and somewhat not. I still manage to make a bit of progress, like 20 pages are already done so I don’t have to panic too much when it comes to updates. I just wish I could draw illustrations or even doodles.

Anyways, that was a very exhausted skeleton with a very painful arm ranting about their boring life. How’s yours ?

#mun speaks #ramble #more like whining like a little b-

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misscaptainbear · 1 year

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A while back I wrote a blog on how I'd make a soulslike using retro hardware, I'm gonna repost it here :D

I suffer from an affliction many programmers and game developers can sympathize with: We tend to have so, so many ideas and nowhere near enough time to execute them. I'm toying with the idea of making a blog talking about random ass concepts of the above variety, while merging design, programming, and rendering topics. If anyone wants to implement this scatterbrained mess, may god have mercy on their souls. At the very least, I hope it's a fun read.

This idea came from a remark from a designer friend of mine while we were discussing the soulslike games, something to the effect of "Y'know what? Souls games have the gameplay of a Playstation 2 game with better graphics". He was more right than he thought, having said that a year or two before the release of the Bloodborne PS1 Demake, (shoutout to @b0tster!!!) which I will always take the opportunity to share.

But, both the above planted a brain worm that I couldn't shake; what might happen if you pushed it even further? Is a soulslike game even possible on earlier hardware? Say, the SNES?

What is a Soulslike?

Obviously seminal genres mean different things to different people, so I'm going to oversimplify here as a way to define the goals for this thought experiment. I think genres are composed of tropes, so I’ll list a few important ones here that I think any soulslike game would require.

Combat that rewards skill, rhythm, and spatial understanding

Complex world maps that allow progress to unlock shortcuts or alternate routes

Misanthropic lore that puts the players struggle into a larger context

Core game loop of attempting to progress to a checkpoint, either failing, returning, or unlocking the next stepping stone.

What can the SNES do?

Not much, honestly. That’s kind of the fun of the thought experiment. It’s specifically designed for 2D sprite-based games. For example, the background rendering hardware takes a map of tiles and the locations they map to, and draws them on screen using a palette.

There are some additional tricks that aren’t apparent in the system. You can set the hardware to several modes, Mode 7 being the most infamous and directly related to what we’re talking about today. Simply put, it allows the linear transformations of the background [1]. By changing settings for every scanline, it also allows affine transformations, like those in camera projection transformations [2]. This allows for a crude simulation of a 3d plane, similar to Mario Kart or Pilot Wings.

Mode 7 in F-Zero

In addition to background layers, the SNES hardware is also designed to support drawing sprites to the screen. These are also drawn from a table using a palette, and given several attributes, like position and priority [3].

Pixel data and palette data combine to form the final sprite

The SNES can show up to 128 sprites on screen. Those sprites can have up to 15 colors + transparent, and they can be up to 64x64 pixels. There can only be 32 sprites shown on a horizontal scanline at a time.

What Does our Souls Game Look Like?

Since I think it’s important to retain the three dimensionality of both the combat and the world exploration, I feel the game should at least attempt to break out of the 2d hardware a little. Another important part of the games is the situational awareness that the third-person camera affords.

I find that concept of a screenshot really help communicate the intent of what the game might look like.

As far as tone and mood, obviously it should be dark and brooding. For fun and just to pick something, I’ve settled on a biblical, angels-and-demons theme, set in a world destroyed by their war. More on the lore later. The souls games do a really good job at dividing the game into iconic, recognizable sections. Castle corridors, dripping caves, haunted moors, and barren wastelands are all on the table. Here’s some concept doodles illustrating some of the locations.

How the Hell do we Render These?

So, the SNES doesn't have native 3D support, but we’re circling around the concept of a 3D game - we’re in trouble, right? Well, only sort of.

Before 3D acceleration hardware (e.g graphics cards) became common, games such as Wolfenstein 3D and Ultima Underworld made do with limited processors, rendering the game directly using software. We’re going to adapt the concepts they used for those games - and we know these things are totally possible, because we’re able to see them in action with SNES Doom [4]. However, this uses the Super FX chip, and I’d like to avoid (hypothetically) using that if possible, so we’ll focus on techniques that aren’t reliant on rendering lots of polygons.

StarFox uses shaded polygons and on occasion texture mapped polygons, but requires the use of the Super FX chip on the cartridge.

We’ll start by talking about the techniques used in Wolfenstein 3D and Super 3D Noah’s Ark [5]. They use a grid-based raycasting renderer. The algorithm for drawing the screen is fairly simple, as follows [6].

Consider a map that is a grid of either floor or wall blocks. For each horizontal pixel in the game, shoot out a ray line into the world, and calculate how far it travels before hitting a wall. Save that distance number and also where along the wall it hits.

Next, draw a vertical strip of pixels, the height of which is a multiple of the distance the ray for that column traveled. For example, a far away wall should draw a short vertical bar of pixels, and a nearby wall would draw taller.

You can enhance this by using which wall was hit to look up which texture should be drawn, and by changing the color to draw based on the distance, giving a fog or fade to black looking effect.

Intersection calculations only need to be done on grid boundaries

This technique is possible on the SNES as demonstrated with Super 3D Noah’s Ark, but it also produces uninteresting, repetitive square maps. With just a little bit of adjustment, I think we can tweak it to still be performant, and to display more interesting maps.

First, let’s add a conceptual height to each box. This is a value that adds to the vertical strip of pixels in addition to the distance-height scaling mentioned previously. However, it’s important to only consider this for the upper half of the screen, and to clip the vertical strip when it touches the “ground plane”.

This would stretch the pixels vertically by 2, but I don’t think it’s a big deal for this sort of aesthetic.

This technique works fine as long as the player can’t get above or below the pseudo-polygons enough to look at them obliquely, but since our player and camera are going to be glued to a constant height, this is not a problem.

The other issue is that of the grid. As mentioned, this produces uniformly similar maps that are uninteresting, and since souls games are sustained by complex map design, we need to break that grid.

Doom uses a technique called Binary Space Partitioning, where the walls to render are pre-calculated per each room (‘sector’), and the walls of the room the player is standing in are drawn first. Then, any doors or windows that link this room to another are filled in recursively, as long as the camera has a view of them [7]. The drawback of this technique is that it is both memory intensive (having to store the pre-calculate sectors and connections), and it is computationally intensive, requiring the use of the Super FX chip onboard the cartridge.

We’re going to use a lower-fidelity version of this approach. Consider a room that can be represented as a list of lines that forms a convex polygon. Each line can either be a wall or a portal to another room.

We’ll assume we know what room the player is in, and the direction they’re facing. To draw a room, we cast a whisker ray from the left-most pixel of the virtual camera, and iterate all of the room’s lines to find an intersection. Do this again for the right-most pixel. This gives us the bound indices, and the lines between those bounds are the only ones to raycast against in order to draw them to the screen. In fact, the line the previous ray hit and the immediate left and right lines are the only ones needed to test for each new collision.

As we iterate the vertical bars, I would also go from the edges of the screen inward - drawing the right and left most pixels first, and ending at the center of the screen. This will become apparent why in a moment.

Portals present a unique case. If we cast a ray that intersects a portal, we re-cast a whisker ray using that new room as the list of lines. If we draw from the screen edge, inward, we can pause this side of the image and wait until the other side “finds” the same portal as we do, and cast another whisker ray on the other side to re-establish the bounds to iterate. Note that this will work if and only if the portals are a single line flanked by two walls, enforcing the case where a portal strictly connects only two sectors. Also, limiting this portal depth to only one would be prudent. Drawing the fog-color for the portals in connecting rooms would probably look fine.

Disclaimer: Since I haven’t actually done the legwork of implementing this on hardware, I have no idea exactly how (non) performant this would be. My guess is that it’d probably be possible on hardware with some compromises, maybe having to sacrifice texture mapping, fog effects, or walls having different heights. Possibly all three. We would probably also consider halving the vertical and horizontal resolution of the 3D effects, which would speed up rendering significantly. For the sake of having fun graphics in the mockups, I’m just going to assume we get to keep those features, and can render at full resolution, and proceed onward.

From there we can start to have some fun. It’s nigh impossible to draw things like round cylinders and spheres, so I’d recommend the tried-and-true method of using camera-facing sprites to enhance low-poly graphics. Things like the caps of castle towers and roofs of huts, can be added with this method. Other world objects like the player, enemies, trees, and items will also be drawn to the screen this way. (Note: All of the mockups of the game in this blog were rendered in Unity, but strictly followed the rules of the SNES and the limitations described above)

Note that the tree and spire sprites are rendered in world-space, and are therefore much lower resolution. The player sprite would be rendered in screen-space using the hardware supported sprites, allowing it to be much higher resolution.

We can also pull some other interesting tricks. For the floor, we can render out a tilemap using the Mode 7 technique described above. For an exterior, we can scroll the background tiles to line up forming a horizon skybox. For interior scenes, like for castles and caves, we can mirror the floor technique to create a ‘ceiling’. We will have to keep the wall heights all the same for this perspective trickery to work, however.

The pixel art for the player sprite turned out really good and took a while, so you’re going to be seeing it a lot.

Combat Design

To figure out our design needs here, we’re going to start with how Soulslike games play, and work back from there.

First, to pay off the player’s timing skills, they have long windup and cooldown animations when attacks happen - both for the player and the enemies. This presents a problem for our imaginary console; long animations means lots of frames, and as depicted in the mockups above, we also have a relatively large player sprite (78 px by 88 px). To mitigate these limitations, we’re again going to have to cut back and approach it strategically.

There’s probably a more optimal division, but this was by hand.

For the animations, to store them, we can use a lower bit depth for the images than the SNES natively uses. The console hardware natively uses a 4 bits per pixel, giving 15 colors + alpha. If we reduce the color down to use at most 8 colors per sprite, we can use 3 bits per pixel, and convert when writing to the sprite memory. This does potentially waste the other 8 colors of that sprites palette, but this can be recycled as a different sprites palette. In fact, this can also give us more palettes to work with. Heck, if we were to push it to 4 colors per sprite (2 bits per pixel), we could get 4x the sprites in ROM with 4x the palettes. However, this might result in bad looking graphics, so all the sprites in the example mockups use at most 7 colors + alpha.

There are also some more tricks that can give us more visuals for our memory. We could write tools that identify exact and very close sub-sprites (8 px by 8 px tiles), and simply reuse those when drawing new images to the screen. Again, having fewer colors means these are more likely to occur. This is similar to how the wide array of animations were implemented in Aladdin [9] and by hand in a smaller scale for the NES game Micro Mages [10]. I haven’t found anything confirming this, but I suspect it’s also how large sprite games like Street Fighter 2 manage to fit on the console.

Giving the match algorithm a threshold rather than requiring a perfect match would probably look good enough, too.

Combat design would also have to contribute to saving resources. We would limit the player to fighting one, rarely two enemies at a given time for a location. Fortunately, the structure of the souls games readily lends itself to this, which would reinforce the deadliness of each encounter. We would also probably have to limit the total number of enemies in the game, to further save on memory. To mitigate the feeling of reuse, the enemy’s AI would have to be a primary focus of the programming for the game, so that each would feel like a unique and difficult challenge every time they were encountered.

The other aspect of souls games that needs to be respected is the 3-dimensionality of the combat. Dodging, ducking, and simply moving allows the player to gain tactical advantage. Calculating 3D collisions can be extremely computationally expensive, but I think it can be done in such a way that can easily run on hardware.

The first advantage we have is that we’re likely fighting only 1 or two enemies, so our sword/spear/axe need only check if it’s colliding with those, and nothing else. We can express the collision test as a single point, defined as 3 numbers representing the x, y, and z elements, and the collider as a axis-aligned rectangle defined by 2 points, each with an x, y, and z.

But wait! Players and enemies in dark souls can’t jump! We can probably reduce the collider hitbox to be expressed as a x and z width and depth, and then a 2d point with a height. And - what if the hitbox is assumed to be square? Then we can remove the depth, leaving us with a 4 byte definition for a box. This might make the collision test inefficient, though, so we might end up wanting to keep the 6 byte hitbox.

So, when the player swings a sword, we look up the pre-authored 3D position of the sword based on the frame of animation, and position it in a world space relative to the enemy hitbox, using as much integer math and cosine table lookups as possible. Then, we test to see if that point is inside the hitbox. If it is, we can tell the player that a hit has occurred, play reaction animations on both the player and the enemy, and deal damage. Since the most expensive part is the transformations, testing multiple points along the swing of the sword to simulate continuous collision detection might be a good idea that would be fairly performant.

A poor man’s continuous collision detection.

From there, we can add in crouching and rolling to the hitbox by lowering the height at runtime, and iframes by marking the player as invulnerable. If we end up using the 6 byte hitbox, we could even implement a jump, raising the lower-bound corner of the hitbox.

This gives us a relatively expressive combat system - low swings that must be dodged (or jumped), high swings that must be crouched under, and other shapes like slanted or vertical swings that must be identified and moved away from accordingly.

The hard part is making tools to author all the different points to that the weapon would be at.

Controls

Right-bumper and Left-bumper to rotate the camera around the player

D Pad to move the player relative to the screen

A to interact, and heavy attack

B to light attack

Y to duck, Y + D Pad to roll

X to use equipped item

Start to open the in-game menu

Select to change equipped item

Asset Production

In the era before cgi became cost effective, creating 3d-looking assets was a huge undertaking, especially for large animated sprites. The toolchains for assets were usually custom for each game, and professional tools weren’t widespread, cheap, or accessible.

If I were tasked with directing a game like this, I think my asset pipeline would be very inspired by Doom and Mortal Kombat. Since there would need to be multiple angles of each animation, I would set up an array of cameras around a subject, and then pose them, and take many pictures at the same time to capture the view from each angle.

For humanoid characters, I would probably recommend actual humans with costuming, much like as mentioned previously, Mortal Kombat. The player character could equip armor sets and have their appearance change, but only the entire costume, not each piece individually. This would also allow simple recoloring of the armor by using different palettes, giving even more variation.

Finish him!

For the non-humanoid monsters and possibly even for some of the 2d planar sprites, like trees, I would actually turn to terrain- and miniatures. For Doom, they actually sculpted some of the monsters in clay around wire armatures, and then posed them and captured them on a turntable to digitize them from every angle. However (I haven’t found a source for this) I suspect it wasn’t wildly successful, because about half of the monsters are either drawn from hand or kit-bashed out of other digitized monster parts. Either way, this would give the game non-human demonic characters with flailing limbs and bizarre forms, and provide really detailed props like trees and wells and bushes.

I didn’t have time or the motivation to do the above for this blog post, but this is a really cool way to create assets for old games that might actually be possible. Theoretically, one could also 3D render these back in the day with a Silicon Graphics workstation - much like how Donkey Kong Country was made [11], but that’s not quite as fun, is it.

Lore and Gallery

Look, we all get carried away. Here’s a big lore dump for this imaginary game, both that which would take place before the game, and the events that take place during the game. Peppered in are some mockup screenshots of the game. Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing and imagining it!

Eternal War

In the second age, the Divine War began between the Demona of the Underrealm and the Angels On High. Generations of humanity were born and died not knowing if it would ever end. The cycle churned the earth to mud and tore at the gristle of the world, devastating cities, corrupting rivers, grinding down the very mountains that clawed the darkened skies. The godly strength wielded by both sides gutted the world, cutting dungeons deep into the earth, and raising holy strongholds that pierced the continent like barbs.

Caught in the middle, humanity cowered in the fields and beneath their thatched roofs, praying for the mercy of a quick death at best. None believed the conflict could end; it simply was.

Annihilation

None alive know what tipped the scales of balance, but gradually the Demona gained ground. At the Gilded Keep, during the final battle, the Archangel Cassalia sacrificed herself with a dark magick, annihilating the keep and the surrounding armies. The 6 Demona Kings, greedy and impatient in their impending victory, fell to the fiery inferno. However, the other Archangels, the final bastion of Angels, and scores of the Demona legions were destroyed as well.

Men peeked tentatively from their shelters, finding only the battered armor of Angels and mangled corpses of the damned, and cautiously took their first steps into the light of a new era. Crops were planted in earnest, and the sun swept golden hills glowed with new, if wan, light.

Vitality

Centuries after the end of the war, rumors of the return of demon kings or archangels are still exchanged in taverns after too much ale. Humanity struggles and people are starving, but there are more born every year that survive the winters. Occasionally, Demona are sighted skirting towns and haunting roads, feasting on the unwary travelers flesh, but for the most part all is peaceful, if uneasy.

Enlightenment

You are an experienced fighter of demons, and you’ve been summoned to Tarnis, a village near the ruins of the Gilded Keep. You’ve agreed to come after the village scraped together enough gold to convince you to come help. As you arrive, you hear tales of a Demona Prince, a rarer and more devious variant that has a propensity for organizing larger covens and commanding minions.

You delve deep into the ruins of the keep, protecting yourself from the local fauna, ancient Angelic traps, and the occasional lowly demon, until you reach a sanctum far below the loam outside.

You behold the golden body of an Angel - the first seen in living human memory. She has clearly been tortured, and the tormentor, the Demona Prince Z’lek moves quickly to eviscerate your intrusion. Blade flashes against bone and claw, and the creature falls twitching and writhing in it’s own ichor.

You free the Angel, who names herself Ailas, and she tells of the rebirth of the six Demon Kings. She begs of you to slay these reanimated carcasses, and promises the eternal ecstasies of divinity in exchange for your devotion to her.

King Hunting

Your travels take you to flooded tombs in fetid swamps, to barren desert temples, to deep underground where the air ripples with the heat of the planet’s womb and the ground glows beneath your feet.

Veritas

You limp back to the Gilded Keep, clinging at wounds that refuse to close. Pushing open the door to the throne room, you see Ailas atop her restored place, resplendent and bared in gold. She offers a hand to you, and asks one final question - will you join her? Or will you fight and slay her to take the throne for yourself, and for humanity?

Further Reading

[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FVN_Ze7bzw

[2] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7gWmdgXPgk

[3] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57ibhDU2SAI

[4] https://doom.fandom.com/wiki/Super_NES

[5] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_3D_Noah%27s_Ark

[6] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhMMK3QLxSM

[7] https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=822&v=HQYsFshbkYw&feature=youtu.be

[8] https://twobithistory.org/2019/11/06/doom-bsp.html

[9] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOnUITJqRQQ

[10] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWQ0591PAxM

[11] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTBnzCb6jMM

#soulslike #soulsborn #dark souls #retro games #retro inspired #snes #gamedev #indie dev #game design

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ckurashima-acmwo-capstone · 5 months

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Progress Report #9

Since the previous post has rushed over a lot of the process due to my lack of updating the blog, I will use this report to go more into depth on the processes while introducing new things that I have done today below. For the section illustrations, I wanted to follow what I initially had in mind from my Mood Board. The one I struggled the most in representing is originality. I wanted to emulate that idea of merging existing things and making it their own piece of work. I initially drafted the cone-like structure next to the light bulbs, but realized that it would fit much better in representing variety. I then decided to follow the lightbulb idea and merge it with what I had from my page background illustration.

For my page background, I wanted to emulate the idea of doodling and sketching. After experimenting with different style and color, I decided to follow my first sketch and play around with the shapes from the second and fourth. Exporting the image as a Wix page background was my main struggle for this step. The required image size needed to fill up the whole page was not clear. I have tried researching and found minimal results from my attempts. I then decided to do a trial by error to see the image boundaries.

Similar to my intentions with my page background, I wanted my pattern to be doodle-like. I decided to do my third sketch that emulates thick brush strokes. Unlike the previous obstacles, I did not have any struggles other than image sizes when importing it on Wix and through mobile.

What I have done today was designing my website logo and thumbnail. I followed my concepts from the previous works I have made and experimented with the initials with my title. At first, my title was "Artistic Vision", which I have decided to change it to "Artistic Reflection". I felt that reflection fits with what my website is all about; a source of information that introduces art portfolios in a different light. After playing around with the initials, I've chosen the highlighted one from my sketch. The design follows the doodle style I am going for. I then created it through Adobe Illustrator and designed a thumbnail page for it.

Now that I have had some time to breathe, I feel like I'm closer to the finish line than I had initially thought. I'm not planning on adding new pages since adding more stuff could distract myself from polishing what I have right now. For some reason, the containers and sections that I have made to be adjacent keeps on leaving tiny gaps whenever I come back to the editing after a break or two. I also want to make sure the website is functioning well. I have already published the website and tested out the link on my own computer. For now, I will keep an eye on small errors or mistakes until the end of the semester.

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akacatkat · 11 months

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I don't have a fun little illustration to go with this month so I'm using this cute little doodle by the wonderful urumin <3

Past me, I did not sleep enough this month. Matter of fact I ruined my sleep schedule a little bit. I've failed you, but I'll do better.

Every month goes by so fast, but May feels like it particularly went by fast without me realizing/remembering all the things I did this month. I think a lot of it really was just recovering from a stack of deadlines that unfortunately happened all at once. May felt a little aimless I suppose. A good bit burned out and tired as well. There were a lot of non-illustration/design stuff that was personally a bit difficult, mostly admin tasks that I couldn't get my brain to focus on to start. This month I finished up two full illustrations and applied a bit of motion to one. After Effects is not my strongest suit but I must admit I did refresh/learn a good few things from doing it. I'm tempted to play more with motion in the future, to what extent? I'm unsure. My computer as is does not enjoy running AE all that much. I might do a mini write up on the little motion project I did. (I'm behind on a lot of write ups I've been wanting to do. I should get on that.)

For June, I want to work at a nice pace on my zine piece. I want to steadily make progress on the design work I have on hand as well. I want to work harder to find a better balance to a lot of the things I do since I'm very intense and will do a bit too much than I'm actually capable of. I might not have a big threshold for things, but I should honor that a bit more and be more kind. Going over board every time really just results in me being out of commission for a good while.

In June I want to either take a solid week break or a solid week to study something or learn something new as well (a full week is a bit long, maybe just five days).

#monthly look back #May look back #acat chats #perhaps I have adhd I need to look into that

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reidak-artcreature · 1 year

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Coral & the Cook annual redraw

Redrawing the same piece every year since 2019 to see my progress.

2019

The sketch that started it all. It was a mindless doodle made in class back in november 2019. I'd just started drawing again, and it shows. Proportions and anatomy weren't a thing for me back then. And those eyes are going to haunt my dreams forever.

I did forget completely about this after drawing it. Just two nameless character concepts that would never be drawn again.

2020

2020 came and I discovered Mermay. Somehow I remembered the sketch and I decided to make a full color illustration with the concept.

I did improve a lot in those few months. Hands are not as bad as they could have been. Well, hand is not as bad as it could have been. Mermaid is completely missing an arm. Dude's eyes got better, but anatomy is pretty wonky still. I didn't give any thought to the clothes, I just wanted to cover the parts I wasn't to sure about. Background is just a mess, and someone should have taken the airbrush away from me.

Characters started getting a bit of backstory, but not too much. Just that the dude found an injured mermaid mermaid. Still no names.

2021

Decided to make it into an annual thing to redraw that piece. Coral got her name and got warmer colors. Dude got a name I forgot next day and became a pirate and a cook.

This time I started using references, none for the background though. I went a lot more expermental with the lighting, and it doesn't look too bad. Clothes still exist almost only to cover the parts I wasn't too sure about, but they are getting better. Anatomy and proportions have gotten a lot better too, Coral has at least one arm now.

Backgrond is lineless because it looked weird with the lineart. It still looks weird. Specially because the world seems to end behind the isle? Where the heck is the horizon?

2022

Sebastian finally got his name! And another complete change of outfit. Coral ended up being a clownfish. It wasn't on purpose to make the little mermaid that gets lost into a clownfish, but the colors fit her.

Decided to change the pose a bit, and, being the resposible artist that I am, I didn't use the clothing to hide the parts I wasn't sure about. That was past me. I used a rock.

Anatomy got a bit better. Specially faces and torso. But those hands are horrible. Coral's are almost non existant. The world doesn't end after the island thankfully. The rocks are quite funny looking, and the sky is not too bad for the first time doing something like that.

I abslutely hate Sebastian's color scheme. I just placed random stuff and hoped it worked. I also was too scared to do propper lighting for some reason.

2023

#mermay #art #digital art #ocs #illustration #-Coral #-Sebastian #fantasy #art progress

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junicane · 1 year

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I posted 1,610 times in 2022

23 posts created (1%)

1,587 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@hiveswap

@theminecraftbee

@daggryet

@bdoubleowo

@sajdd

I tagged 1,029 of my posts in 2022

Only 36% of my posts had no tags

#fanart - 455 posts

#dsmp - 231 posts

#hermitcraft - 129 posts

#homestuck - 128 posts

#tommyinnit - 122 posts

#grian - 104 posts

#wilbur soot - 76 posts

#meme - 65 posts

#goodtimeswithscar - 51 posts

#vid - 47 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#i lost two of my top ten fics after some fandom drama (unrelated to the fics the authors just didn’t want to be associated with the fandom)

My Top Posts in 2022:

I can’t wait to actually finish this project, it’s taking much longer than I expected it to but hopefully I’ll speed up a bit! Anyway here’s the first 3/12 osmp designs from the colour palette/expression meme project. The reason it’s taking so long is that I’m also doing full character pages with half-body illustrations in my more complete style (like this):

Progress on the sneeg one is going… interestingly. By which I mean I had to ditch the portrait orientation and go landscape to make a coherent composition. I guess I could split the cast in half and do half vertical half horizontal?

See the full post

7 notes - Posted January 16, 2022

@shuchelle here is the doodle my friend! from the spotify ask game here is Grian + song #56 (Mama's Gun- Glass Animals)

11 notes - Posted December 3, 2022

he’s learning <3

...i miss him :(

12 notes - Posted October 15, 2022

Can we go back to freaking out wondering why grian changed his skin to look raggedy and tired? That was fun we should do that

14 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

hello love!!! grian + song #56 pls !!!!

ououghouu all these lyrics are giving me desert duo so hard but Chelle you have to look away there are spoilers and I know you haven't finished Third Life yet cover your EYES. i made a separate doodle to tide you over until you can actually look at the drawing i made for the prompt, i’ll tag you <3

Grian + song #56 (Mama's Gun- Glass Animals)

"You murdered him."/ My heart strings broke and it was me

15 notes - Posted December 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #I like the things I drew this year #Even if they didn’t get notes I like how they came out and that matters a lot more to me #I barely drew anything at all in 2021 so it’s a very hopeful feeling to be back in the groove

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sofiapagen-archive · 1 year

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Blog 3.14.23

It's nuts to believe that it was almost 2 years ago that I had to sever a relationship with someone I deeply respected, and drew two pieces reflecting that event.

Due a myriad of other issues, in November of that same year that I started to go to therapy and really dedicate myself to the one project that matters most: myself. BLOGGING BELOW~~

One could call it cringy, embarrassing, to create and post things like this image below. I captioned it "Uhhhh 5 min doodle. :) I am a beam of unstoppable light". I said it and I tried my best to mean it, but I knew I was trying so hard to undo, well, all the 25+ years of trauma and non-productive lines of thinking. I still felt shame. But I published it anyway.

So embarrassing! Right? Horrible paper, horrible picture. 0 notes. WHICH BY THE WAY, this number doesn't show how many people Saw this image, only how many people chose to interact with it (this is why I much prefer Youtube for statistics). These numbers used to crush my heart. But in this case, it was SUCH A RELIEF! Somehow we think these numbers reflect our worth. I tested the waters so many times to see if I could rely on my art for income. And of course, I couldn't. Even when I ventured into making NSFW art, I knew our current economic system isn't a fair field, and I'd be sacrificing a very important skill just to survive. Like using a crystal needle to thread barbed wire.

If you have thought to yourself "why can't I art?? Everyone arts!!! all the time!!! art, art, art, everything around me is art!", then that's when I suggest that you take a step back and see what else in your life needs taking care of besides what you are making and publishing online. Take your time. Maslow's hierarchy of needs and all that.

I couldn't rely on Art to improve on my financial needs, so I applied for a full-time job that could cover that. Everything is a work in progress, but aspects need a sturdy enough foundation to allow for the next step to flourish. So like I said, take your time. It takes courage to let goals go for a while and prioritize others. It takes trust, and faith. I for one play the long game. Good luck to you, so you can as well.

PS: one can witness the growth I've gone through from looking at my vent art illustrations; they have more and more explicitly communicated to the viewer what my thoughts and ideas are. 👀

2012 ☝️ Wanted to play cool as if moving to America totally wasn't super difficult.

2017 ☝️ Hiding the fact I felt conscious about my age

2020 ☝️ I thought if I made this thought pretty, I wouldn't be judged

2021 ☝️ I couldn't bring myself to finish this, and also censored the things I wanted to say.

2022 ☝️A DIRECT QUOTE... INCREDIBLE!

2023 ☝️ Pretty badass, you have got to admit. 😎

That's it, thanks for reading!

#not art #for all the reblog and all that i hope you have a good rest of your day #thanks everyone

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jasperygrace · 2 years

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February 2022 Mid Monthly Report

Hello hello, everyone!

It is once again time for the Mid-Monthly Report. This month we will talk about how storyboarding for Project : Desert is going as well as discuss some thoughts as we start wrapping up Act 1.

If you are interested in learning more about Project : Desert, do consider checking out the Masterlist or my Artstation for more info.

So without further ado, let's begin!

Project Progress

Storyboarding

I just recently finished up the thumbnails for Chapter 3, and I think I'm getting a hang of the whole process now. Still a lot I have to learn, but it's a learning process. On that note, I'd like to show you a few boards that I've got so far!

(I apologize if the images look a little crusty-- my printer likes to mess with the quality of scans)

So I've mentioned this in a previous report before, but I figure now would be a good time to explain the type of media that Project : Desert is. Pro:Des is planned to be a light novel; it will feature both full page illustrations as well as smaller illustrations among the text itself. Comic sequences as seen with the first image are very few-- I only have three instances of them actually planned, at the start of Chapter 1, the end of Chapter 2, and the climax (which isn't for awhile yet). Otherwise, it will be illustrations similar to the other two images featured.

I'm a little bit behind on storyboarding as it stands, but I'm getting caught up finally. Since I'm done with the big comic sequences, I'll probably be increasing how many chapters I storyboard for in a month. We'll aim for 3 chapters a month, that way we can get caught up to where I am in writing.

Act 1

As of writing this, I'm finishing up Chapter Nine, and I have two more chapters until I complete Act 1. It's kind of crazy to think about to be honest (I think I say that every time I reach a goal, haha).

I'm thinking of doing a brief plot synopsis about what's happened up to this point when I do finish Act 1. Mostly spoiler free, of course, but I do want to keep y'all in the loop about what's happening within the story space, and I thought some brief summaries would be a fun way to do it. Oh, maybe I can make them these short comics with the characters drawn as doodle bugs. To make sure spoilers stay contained, I will probably only be discussing the synopsis here in the Mid-Monthly Report rather than make them their own posts, but if you'd like to see them outside the MMR, then do let me know :^)

Goals

Here were my goals from January:

Write three chapters by February 15th [done]

Finish thumbnails for Chapters Two & Three by February 15th [done]

Complete secret project by February 15th [almost done, more details later]

February Goals:

Write three chapters/ complete Act 1 by March 15th

Storyboard for Chapters 4, 5, & 6 by March 15th

Decide on new illustration set and have thumbnails for it done by March 15th

Complete secret project by March 1st

That sums up my report for this month!... ... or does it? If you've read this far, you probably noticed that "secret project" that's being mentioned in my goals. I can't say much about it right now, but it's something I'm very excited to be able to present to you once it's completed. I'm hoping for it to be a new outlet to express my creativity as well as a way to share Project : Desert on a wider scope.

I hope you will look forward to when that time comes, and as always, thank you for reading and I hope you will support me in my future endeavors!

#writeblr #dev blog #monthly report #Mid Month Report #Project : Desert #jasper.txt #jasper's archive #MMR2022

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m-i-r · 3 years

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NaLu 2020 hints compilation -Part 2-

You can find part one here

So now that the year's pretty much come to its end (finally) and there's no new content to add (unless Mashima gets really generous on us in the final stretch, but I doubt xD), I decided to make a part two with all the new stuff that we got since part one~

Just like part 1, let's start with twitter doodles:

Mashima has now participated in NaLu day for the third year in a row! And this time he has drawn us two doodles, one is set in some AU where Natsu's smart enough to be Lucy's tutor (lol), and the other one's more IC but it's left for the fans to color~ I believe that the first one was inspired by the FT x QQ collab that was going on in the FT game around that time.It's cute to see Lucy blush so intensely at tutor!Natsu, she truly has it bad for this dork in each and every universe. xD This also makes me wonder if Natsu could’ve been smart if he was raised by his human parents normally. His older brother's kind of a genius after all, so the right genes are there lol.

As for the second doodle, I absolutely love how close and comfortable they are w/ e/o, and the way Natsu's precious scarf is intentionally put around Lucy too is adorable♥

Now, onto Live Autograph Session hints!

Mashima was asked to draw NaLu twice during this session:

And he told us throughout it that's he aware of NaLu's popularity and likes them himself. He also said that they're fun to draw, and are being drawn in a "more than friends" fashion in the manga rn (which he likes). He also eluded that you need to read 100YQ to see their development. Hopefully he lives up to his promises lol.

Now onto the manga!

On the bright side: They finally reunited and their daughter even got canonized in a sense!

On the not-so-bright side: They're separated again and Mashima's still not developing Natsu orz

But let's take it step by step:

In chapter 61, we got this lovely moment where Lucy’s more worried about Natsu than herself.

Her special and unique feelings for this dork are made more and more apparent. She's the only character who's truly, canonically in love with him.

In chapter 62, we got another moment:

This one I believe is easy to connect to the moment from the movie "Dragon Cry". (In it Natsu partly becomes a dragon, but the transformation isn't complete and it's reversed. At the end though, Natsu asks Lucy what he looks like to her - feeling obviously conflicted at not being completely human - but Lucy responds that he just looks like Natsu to her. That immediately relieves him (which is better illustrated in Mashima's sketches for the movie) and he later passes out in her arms.)

In this moment, Natsu’s flat out called a dragon and a demon, but it doesn't even make him flinch, because it's no longer a subject that he's conflicted about (like in the movie), and that's all thanks to Lucy - which is why I believe she’s the only one illustrated despite him generally talking about friends and people who believe in him. Lucy has a particular, special and deep impact on Natsu, and I believe he’ll be made to realize it more and more as the sequel progresses.

In chapter 63, Natsu and Lucy are finally reunited, and the cover illustrates their reunion:

I think it's important to note that while they're not the only ones that got "reunited", their reunion took the spotlight, and Juvia's face says it all heh.

In chapter 64, we got some classic NaLu shenanigans:

I liked seeing Natsu seriously set out to help his smol waifu get back to normal.

The boy even stopped himself from childishly taking advantage of her situation (which he obviously wanted to do for a sec) in favor of helping her lol lol:

and we got to see Lucy wearing his coat in the end:

In chapter 65, we went back to Edolas!

And we saw that Edolas!NaLu are now married and w/ a baby:

Nasha's officially canon! She's not exactly the Nasha that we wanted, but she's the only Nasha that we have for the time being (but she’s absolutely precious nonetheless). XD We even got to know where and how she was made lol:

But what I feel is most important:

1) Ashley assured Lucy that since her relationship with Dragion progressed and is doing well, hers and Natsu's will too:

And what’s even more important to remember is that while Ashley’s the one who’s saying those words, Mashima is the one who’s writing them.

2) Natsu taking a huge liking to Nasha, he even wanted to take her back to Earthland with him:

He may not know how babies are made yet, but he sure seems receptive to the idea of having one already lol. Would be fitting if that’s how the sequel ended, no? (after all the necessary... explanations and realizations ofc)

And last, but not least... Well actually it *is* the least likeable one in here but I think it’s important to mention it:

Chapter 71, Natsu’s pseudo-harem:

Now this one explains a lot about how Mashima perceives Natsu’s character. I remember him once saying that he wanted Natsu to have a love triangle w/ Lucy and Lisanna, but to avoid fandom drama he scratched that idea and made Natsu uninterested in romance instead... Now I see that he took that decision so seriously, Natsu can only feel friendship now lol. But I guess establishing/acknowledging something is the first step towards changing/developing it? This proves to us that Lucy had the right idea about Natsu all those chapters ago. And it explains NaLu’s stagnation even more: Natsu’s completely clueless in the romantic department, while as Lucy’s in love but aware of Natsu’s clueless-ness so she has no courage to start anything, as she’s not the “offensive” type anyways.

So all the cards are on the table now, but the waiting game for what seriously moves things forward continues... Will it be something that makes Lucy more open and offensive? Or will it be something that finally teaches Natsu how human reproduction works the meaning and beauty of romance? We’ll see. Now that Gruvia and JErza’s developments are pretty much complete, I think NaLu’s turn is not that far off.

Hopefully 2021 will be good to them and doesn’t give us any more questionable moments lol

#NaLu

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windmaedchen-fairytail · 3 years

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Art Progress

Here is a step-by-step of my drawing process. I use Krita on a Microsoft Surface Book 2 and I made myself a template for these illustrations using the same colours and brushes to complete. I feel that settling for a “style” like this helps me to focus on drawing rather than wasting time thinking about HOW I wanna draw. And from there, one can always break the mold. :D

Step 1 - Base Sketch

Doodling the base pose with a pencil brush, just to get the general gist down. This is very small, actually, so I am unable to add details at this point. xD And who cares about anatomy or perspective, curves and balance are all that matter. Unless I have a distinct reference, then I use that as orientation.

In this case I just needed to find a composition that would show the paper dolls closer the viewer but still leave enough room for the two Dreyars to be fully visible, too.

Step 2 - Sketch

Same brush. I just enlarge the base sketch and draw on top (new layer). Ideally perspective and proportions should be considered here, because obviously it just get’s harder and more frustrating trying to correct things later on. But when you hit your limit, proceed rather than dwell on your weaknesses. Nothing against learning and pushing yourself, but before your throw the towel out of frustration, continue. ;)

I had NO references, so the perspective is super wonky. I don’t mind such minor inaccuracies, as long as it’s not super distracting from the content.

Step 3 - Pre-line Sketch

This is the step for references. I often take pictures of my own hand (or draw from life if I can) to get them right or I’d stare at pictures of whatever body part I have trouble with (arms, shoulders, muscles, you name it). I did throw my blanket around and copied from that, I opened some screenshots of young Makarov for his hair, face and clothes, I read up on Shikigami, thought about Ivan’s hair etc...

Step 4 - Lines

The FUN PART. If your pre-line sketch is fine (and it should be as fine as possible), go ahead and line this thing! I don’t like having to make up things at this stage anymore and want to keep adjustments at a minimum but if it really is necessary, one can still play around with head size/angle, eyes, hands etc. But still, the better the pre-lines the easier and more fun the rest of the image!

Step 5 - Shading/Details (lined)

I wanted to imitate Mashima’s way of shading using just fine lines but I am way more messy with it. The lines aren’t parallel and slim down before edges, I have thick and heavy lines, too. Knowing your light source is helpful so the shading is not all over the place, but I like keeping everything as simple as possible and do sometimes just use the shading to show that something isn’t flat. Depending on the complexity of the image, I will add greys in another step to add depth.

Step 6 - Flat Shading

The paper dolls were dark very early on, because it’s a good way to show something is closer to the viewer. But I still needed more focus on them (in hindsight, maybe even a blur would have helped?) so I used a flat coloured layer with opacity turned down to suggest a top light above the characters heads in an otherwise dark room. It sets foreground and background apart a bit better, giving another circle around the floating dolls, like a frame, that draws attention to them.

If needed I can use several such layers, for separate objects or more levels of shading.

And that’s it!

When I find a good way to colour these illustrations, I will share a progress as well. But what I coloured so far did not meet my personal standards at all, so I’d rather not dwell on those and move on. xD

#fairy tail #ivan dreyar #makarov dreyar #my art

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natrogersfics · 3 years

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After All - Chapter 3/5

Cover art by @faith2nyc Read on AO3

The hustle and bustle of the aquarium is magnified in the underwater tunnel as locals and tourists alike take in the scenery. But as Steve watches Isabel stare at the glass panels above them with fascination thick on her face and an exclamation of wow! slipping from her lips every now and then, he notes that the ruckus is not nearly enough to drown out his daughter’s infectious excitement. She’d been intrigued the second they walked into the first exhibit and saw a school of colorful fish swim by, all but demanding to be let out of her stroller, and ever since, getting her to walk in stride with him and Natasha instead of an entire full step ahead has been a lost cause.

As Isabel stops by one of the windows to admire an idling turtle, he steals a glance at Natasha to see a smile on her face as she watches Isabel wave at her newfound friend. To say that he was surprised when she offered him a beer last night would be an understatement. While they’ve certainly warmed up to each other in the last few days, Isabel's always been there to serve as a buffer between them, making sure that their conversations never progress longer than the time it takes for her to knock something over or cry for attention. Which is why, when Natasha had been so candid and open about her recent struggles at work with him last night, he was downright stunned. Still, the way they had smoothly transitioned into talking about life and their newfound perspective on it was reminiscent of the times they’d meet up after work to shoot the breeze at Dalton’s. Regardless of what he was going through then, he always left their self-designated booth those nights feeling better, and last night was no different. It’s something he has dearly missed.

It was that camaraderie that made him act on the impulse of asking her to tag along today. And though he’d all but goaded her into saying yes, he was still a bit nervous on his way to her flat this morning. It had been ages since the three of them had gone out together, and most of those instances had been to Christine’s office for Isabel’s checkups. But thus far, he’s glad that their rapport picked up right where it left last night, slipping effortlessly into conversation, catching each other up on mundane things like what their friends back at The Daily are up to and how Natasha’s yet to find a Thai restaurant that compares to their favorite one in the East Village. Further, while he’s certainly had fun discovering new aspects of Isabel’s personality these last few days, he has to admit that it’s nice having someone who shares his amusement to her reactions.

“Did you know that she loved fish this much?” he asks, keeping his eyes on Isabel as she begins to move once again.

“I had an inkling,” Natasha says, pushing the empty stroller. “You know those illustrations of sea creatures you made for her? I had them bound into a book before we moved so they wouldn’t get destroyed, and added it to the rotation when she started showing interest in picture books.” She nods towards Isabel, whose head keeps moving from side to side as she decides which exhibit to focus on next. She chuckles. “But I didn’t think she’d be beside herself like this.”

The corners of his mouth twitch into a smile. “She likes those?”

“They’re her favorite,” Natasha says, nodding in confirmation when he turns to look at her, surprised. “Of course, I try to mix it up every now and then, so her knowledge isn’t just limited to sea animals” – she pauses as they both laugh – “but given a choice? She’d pick that book in a heartbeat, every single time.”

“When we were at the Gardens the other day, the first urn she picked out on the fountain was the dolphin,” he says, slipping his hands into his pockets and no longer trying to contain his smile.

“Well, I did have the dolphin placed on the cover,” she says.

He looks at her, raising an eyebrow at the smile she seems to be biting back. “Because… dolphins are your favorite?”

“Not particularly,” she says. “But I do distinctly remember catching you doodling it during a section meeting.” She smirks at the sheepish expression that makes it onto his face. “Consider it a pre-emptive strike for when there’s a question about who she got her short attention span from.”

“She’s barely two,” he says emphatically, “of course her attention span is short!” When Natasha only shrugs, he scoffs in disbelief. “And excuse me, you’re the one who pretends to take notes on your iPad when really you’re playing Scrabble with Darcy.”

She gasps at his retort, but it’s quickly replaced by a chuckle. “Only when Sitwell’s talking!”

“That’s still an indictment of your attention span,” he counters, causing her to raise an eyebrow in challenge. “I’m just saying-”

“Dada!”

Isabel’s distressed voice interrupts him, but before he and Natasha can search for her, Isabel already has her arms around his leg and her face in the material of his jeans. “Izzie?” he says, scooping her into his arms just as Natasha comes around to them. “What’s wrong?”

“Are you hurt?” Natasha asks, checking Isabel’s arms and legs.

Isabel shakes her head, pointing towards the window to the right. “Shark!”

He and Natasha look over, and sure enough, a large tiger shark looms by the panel, its teeth bared. “Oh, fig,” he says, making sure to keep his amusement out of his tone even as he and Natasha trade yet another fascinated look. “You don’t have to be afraid. We’re inside, it can’t get to you.”

“No,” Isabel says, “home!”

The way Isabel’s arms tighten around his neck causes him to freeze, and he tries to rack his brain for a solution to calm her down. But then Natasha reaches over, patting Isabel’s hair gently. “But fig,” she chimes in, “we haven’t seen the penguins like in Happy Feet, yet.”

Isabel lifts her head from his shoulder, looking to him and then to Natasha. “Pen-gins?”

“Yeah!” Natasha says with a level of excitement he’s only ever heard her use when speaking to their daughter. “How ‘bout it, huh? Can you let Daddy put you down so we can go visit the penguins?”

Isabel smiles, nodding her head. “Okay.”

“Nice save,” he tells Natasha as he takes the stroller from her and she takes Isabel’s hand, leading them towards the hall labeled Polar Adventure.

“You pick up a thing or two after a while,” Natasha says, winking. “You’ll see.”

While he’s gone to see the penguins at Central Park before, he has to admit that the Penguin Point experience really is something special. From the simulated North Pole ambiance, complete with manufactured ice shelves and snowflakes, to the plexiglass bubble that allows visitors to come practically nose-to-beak with the Gentoos, it’s no wonder that Isabel’s been propelled over the moon. Her freight over the shark long forgotten as she and Natasha sit on the ledge of the enclosure to see the penguins wobble by. To the side, their guide dutifully informs them about the speed at which these flightless birds can swim, though he can’t say he’s paying much attention. Ever since he had seen the way Natasha had expertly diverted Isabel’s worries, he can’t seem to peel his eyes away from them, observing their interactions carefully and smiling at the unquestionable love and affection between them.

There’s never been a doubt in his mind about what a great mother Natasha is. He’s seen it firsthand, witnessed how easily she had tackled motherhood from the moment Isabel was born like it was something she was always meant to do. In many ways, he knows that she’s attuned to their daughter in a manner only she can be, instead it’s not something he feels a shred of envy over. He couldn’t be happier or more thankful that she happens to be the mother of his child, and from where he stands, that sentiment is only fortified when he sees Natasha point at the penguins jumping into the water, and Isabel, who’s sitting in her lap, claps her hands in elation.

The sight brings a warmth to his chest, and as he begins to make his way over to them, Natasha looks up, grinning softly, and he smiles back without so much as a second thought as she alerts Isabel of his presence. Isabel turns towards him, her eyes alight. “Having fun?” he asks, bending down.

“Pen-gins, Dada!” Isabel all but shrieks, pointing to the enclosure behind them.

“I’ve never seen her this excited,” Natasha whispers over Isabel’s head as she continues to babble on. “I think she might actually pass out.”

“Good thing I thought to bring the stroller,” he deadpans, chuckling at the way her eyes narrow at him. “Izzie, can we take a picture for grandma?”

Isabel nods, and as he reaches for his phone, Natasha begins to move. “Mama, no!” Isabel says, latching onto Natasha’s arm before she can stand.

“Daddy’s going to take your picture, babe,” Natasha explains.

“You don’t have to move,” he says. “Let’s get a couple shots of the both of you.”

“Are you sure?” she asks, her tone skeptical as she tilts her head to the side. “It’s for your mom...”

“I’m sure she won’t mind,” he says, taking a step back to widen the angle when Natasha goes to sit back with Isabel, pulling her into her lap once more. “Okay, in three, two, one… say cheese!”

“Cheese!” Natasha and Isabel say in unison, the both of them beaming from ear to ear, and he mirrors their expressions as he snaps a few shots of them.

“Why don’t I take some of you two?” Natasha suggests, and with a nod, he switches places with her, handing her his phone as he goes. “Look at momma, Iz! Good girl, now smile!” She moves to the left to shift the angle, and he and Isabel pivot accordingly to get the penguins behind them into the frame. “Okay, now funny face! Perfect!” She giggles from behind the screen. “Sarah’s going to love these.”

He chuckles, accepting his phone back from her to see a picture of Isabel with her tongue out and him cross-eyed. “They’ll be on her fridge in no time.”

“Excuse me?” They look up at the question to see their guide standing before them, a genial smile on his face. “Would you like me to take a photo of the three of you?”

His head whips from their guide to Natasha. “If that’s okay with you?”

“That would be great, actually,” Natasha says, stealing a glance at the nametag on the left side of the man’s vest. “Thank you, Heimdall.” She turns back to him and Isabel, smiling as he moves to make space for her on the ledge. “Let’s make sure she’s looking at the camera. I don’t want to hear it from Nick and Melinda.”

“Nor do I want to hear it from my ma,” he volleys back as she sits down, laughing as she shakes her head.

“Okay,” Heimdall says, holding up the camera before gesturing to them with his free hand. “Move a little closer, yeah?” He and Natasha do as they’re told, scooting closer to one another until their legs are touching, and he shifts Isabel to sit on both of them. “Brilliant! Now everybody lean in… and say penguin!”

“Penguin!” he and Natasha say at the same time Isabel yells cheese, sending them both into a fit of laughter.

When Heimdall gives them a thumbs up, Natasha turns to Isabel, shaking her head fondly. “Such a little rebel.”

“And whom does she take after?” Heimdall asks, only to chuckle when he and Natasha point fingers at one another. “In any case, you lot make a beautiful family.”

He smiles politely as Heimdall passes his phone back. “Thank you.”

“Think she has enough penguin things?” Natasha asks hours later as they sit at a café across the aquarium.

He chuckles over the lip of his coffee mug, setting it down on the table as he looks to the highchair where Isabel is working on her penguin activity book with a penguin scarf around her neck. “Oh, I don’t know,” he says, “maybe ask me again later when she puts on her penguin pajamas.”

“Hey, consider yourself lucky that I was able to negotiate the pajamas in exchange for the stuffed, jumbo penguin,” she says. “We’d probably have to get it its own Oyster card just to get it home.”

“Gift shops or death traps for the wallets of desperate parents?” he muses. “You decide.”

She smirks in agreement. “So…” she trails, propping an elbow on the table to rest her chin on a closed fist. “Christmas Eve. What’re you up to?”

“Not much, really,” he admits. “The hotel I’m staying at said they have something going on in the lounge for a bit, but I’m probably just going to turn in since I promised everyone that I’d wrap their gifts for” – he nods silently towards Isabel – “you know who in time for Christmas morning at yours.”

“They do know she’s coming home with you, right?” she asks. “They could’ve just given it to her there.”

“Believe me, if they listened to me at all, I wouldn’t be so worried about getting sauce on one of the few shirts I have for this trip,” he says, eliciting a laugh from her.

“Point taken,” she says. “But I ask because when I realized Izzie and I weren’t going to make it back for Christmas, I decided to invite some people over to my place for Christmas Eve.” She shrugs. “If you don’t have anything set in stone, you’re welcome to join us.”

“Natasha,” he says, averting his gaze to his hands. “Thank you, that’s very kind of you, but I don’t want to intrude on you and your friends.”

“Hard to be an intruder when you’re being invited,” she counters, sighing when he remains silent. “Steve.” He looks up at her at that, catching her disarming smile. “Look, I know in the past we’ve made a mess of things-”

“Natasha,” he repeats, shaking his head. “Consider that water over the dam.”

“Okay, yeah,” she says. “But now that we’ve put that out there, maybe we can look forward? I mean, I wish I could say that this is the only time a monkey wrench is going to get thrown into our perfectly planned schedules, but I sincerely doubt it. We’re going to be in each other’s lives, Steve. Might as well get used to it.” She eyes Isabel before looking back at him. “Besides, I think she’d really like having her Dad there.”

He scoffs. “When nine out of ten times her answer is no, I’d say the odds aren’t great.”

“Only one way to find out,” she says, tapping Isabel’s arm. “Izzie, you want Daddy to come to Christmas Eve, right?”

Isabel moves her arm out of Natasha’s reach as she continues to color over a penguin with a purple crayon. “M’busy!”

He and Natasha scoff, and she turns to him with a sheepish expression. “Technically that isn’t a no.”

He rolls his eyes at that before letting out a sigh when Natasha raises a brow in challenge. Immediately, his mind conjures a million different reasons to refuse. Spending a day together is one thing, and while he had been the first one to color outside the lines of their custody agreement by asking to spend Christmas with them in the first place, something about this invitation feels different. Meeting the new people in Natasha’s life, when these relationships have no bearing on how well the two of them function as co-parents, seems like a weightier, riskier choice. But then his mother’s words come to mind: like it or not, you and Natasha are forever bonded by the beautiful baby girl you two brought into this world. That makes you family, and families spend Christmas together.

When it comes down to it, with their family being as unorthodox as it is, it was always going to be more complicated to navigate than the average unit. But if Natasha, one of the most pragmatic people he knows and who he trusts to make difficult decisions, is willing to extend an olive branch, who is he to turn it down.

“Okay,” he says, smiling at the way Natasha’s eyes light up when she gets her way. “But then you’re coming cookie decorating with us in Soho tomorrow.”

“Do we get to take the cookies home?” she asks, to which he nods. “Fine, but since you’re keeping me from laundry, we’re dropping by Selfridges after this.”

He smirks. “Deal.”

Christmas carols play softly in the background in Hela’s Cookie Boutique, but Natasha’s only half listening, too distracted by watching Steve and Isabel decorate sugar cookies with the exact same focused expression on their faces. Isabel turns to Steve, bringing a finger up to his face and giggling when he licks the red icing off, and as she catches the exchange, she smiles. Seeing Steve and Isabel interact up close now that their daughter is more engaging has been an experience she didn’t think she’d find so endearing. Of course, she knew Isabel adored him and that the feeling was absolutely and unabashedly mutual, but to see that affection unfold before her very eyes has made her heart unexpectedly expand in her chest.

Perhaps adding to her giddiness is the fact that this sight is also quite comical. With the class geared toward families, miniature workstations had been set up for the children, and as soon as Isabel had seen them, talking her into sitting elsewhere became downright impossible. Despite the smaller than usual seats, though, she notes that she fits just fine. The same could not be said, however, for Steve right next to her. She lets her gaze fall to him, taking her bottom lip between her teeth to keep from smiling. Hunched in his seat, Steve sticks out like a sore thumb, his broad frame looking even more immense as they’re surrounded by other children. Though she had offered to move stations, he’d refused – too willingly beholden to Isabel’s whims to care about his own comfort.

“I should be mad at you for unleashing our daughter in what is essentially a sugar factory,” she says, prompting Steve to turn to her as she snaps a picture of Isabel. “But I have to admit, she does look darn cute in a baker’s hat!”

He chuckles. “Doesn’t the little shoulder shimmy she does along to the music just kill you?”

“So much so I almost forget how hard it’s going to be to give her a bath later,” she says a little too sweetly, eyeing the sticky mess caked onto their daughter’s arms as Isabel puts more icing than her cookie could possibly hold and finding herself infinitely thankful for the aprons they were provided with.

“Tell you what,” he says. “I’ll give her a bath tonight if you promise that my mother will never see those pictures.”

“Not that I would ever let Sarah know that her son is a traitor who took her granddaughter to another bakery for cookie decorating,” she says, putting her phone away. “But since you offered, feel free to take over bath duty anytime you want.”

He narrows his eyes at her, shaking his head when she does not even bother to hide her smile. “That’s fine,” he says, nodding towards the cookie she’s working on. “When she starts to yell at me, I’ll just show her a picture of your lumpy cookie to distract her.”

“We’re not all aiming to make art out of cookies, Michelangelo,” she teases, making him roll his eyes when she points to his immaculately decorated Santa cookie. “Plus, it’s a lot harder to smooth out this icing than it looks!”

“That’s why you never go for the snowflake. There’s not enough surface area,” he says, reaching over for a fresh cookie, this time shaped like a stocking, before scooping out some blue icing with his spatula. “Here, look. All you have to do is lay the icing down and glide the spatula back and forth like so. It’s all in the wrist.”

“Like this?” she asks, trying to mimic his actions, only to glare at him when he fails miserably at holding back his chuckle when the icing still does not lay smoothly on her cookie. “Excuse me for not being raised in a bakery like some people, okay?”

“I’m sorry,” he says through a wide smile. “Grab a new cookie and some icing and I’ll show you.” She does as instructed, barely hiding her surprise when he crouches down behind her seat, his arms all but wrapping around her as he puts a hand over the one she has clutching the spatula. “Just lay the icing” – he begins to guide her hand, first adding some pressure to flatten the blob of icing before gently moving their hands down the cookie – “and glide.” By the time the spatula reaches the edge of the Christmas tree, there’s not a single peak on the icing, and he turns to her, smirking. “Now was that so hard?”

“Guess not,” she says, craning her neck to look at him. “Thanks.”

He grins. “No problem.”

With their proximity, she feels his words just as much as she hears them, but the thought is fleeting, fading as quickly as it had come when she finds herself caught in his smile and the way his eyes look impossibly brighter in this moment. How long they stay staring at each other, she does not know – seconds, maybe a minute. It’s when they hear a squeal from across the table that he looks away, and when she follows his line of sight, her eyes widen when she sees that Isabel’s gotten hold of a piping bag.

“Izzie, no!” Steve says as they both rush out of their seats.

In spite of Steve’s warning, Isabel squeezes down, and she watches in horror as icing bursts out of the bag and onto Isabel’s face. She cringes as Isabel turns to look at her, icing flowing from her chin and down to her neck. “Uh oh.”

With a shake of her head, she laughs. “Uh oh is right, Little Miss.” She steps forward to reach for the baby bag, sighing in relief when she sees it already in Steve’s grip as he hands her a bunch of wet wipes. “Thank you,” she says, before looking at Isabel. “Say, thank you, Daddy.”

“Thank you, Dada?” Isabel says, smiling through the mess on her face as they all burst into laughter.

“Okay, new plan,” Steve says after they work in tandem to get as much icing off Isabel as they can without soap and water. He points to the tray of bare cookies before turning to her. “You lay down the base icing, I will smooth it out, and Miss Sticky over there can be on sprinkles duty.”

She laughs. “You do know she’s just going to throw too many sprinkles on it, right?”

“Ah, but that’s the beauty of giving her already iced cookies,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows. “There’s only so many sprinkles that can stick before the rest just falls off.”

When his expression turns smug, she can only roll her eyes.

The sun’s only begun to sink low into the horizon, casting a halo of warm light across the city, when a chilly breeze blows by, prompting Steve to adjust his scarf to rest more snuggly around his neck. While stopping at a park seems like a ridiculous idea in late December, the decision was strategic. As the saying goes, hell hath no fury like a toddler hyped on sugar, and he and Natasha weren’t about to tempt fate by not providing Isabel with an opportunity to expend all the energy provided by an afternoon spent consuming ludicrous amounts of icing. While Isabel explores the surroundings on the patch of grass before them, he and Natasha sit on the nearby bench, a pile of rocks and weeds that their daughter has discovered and given to them for safe keeping only growing by the minute between them. He looks at Natasha, who’s busy admiring the scenery, to see the box of their leftover cookies resting on her lap, and instantly, the sight brings a smile to his face. Growing up in his mother’s bakery, the smell of butter and sugar in the air always had a way of evoking good feelings in him – a clear sign that wonderful things, usually in the form of a sweet treat, were to come. Today, though, as the three of them laughed and decorated cookies, he finds that those good feelings are akin to glee. The sound of Isabel’s laughter ringing melodiously in the air catches their attention, and when they turn, they can only chuckle when they see her begin to follow a hapless duck a few feet away. He shakes his head. “Why do I feel like we should be helping that duck?” “Because you know what your daughter is like when she’s only running on sugar and no afternoon nap,” Natasha says matter-of-factly, shooting him a knowing look. “Also, that duck’s never gonna see her again anyway. We, on the other hand, have to take her home and deal with the inevitable crash from her sugar high.” She crosses her arms over her chest. “Believe me, the duck can take one for the team right now.” “She was a bit of a menace the other night when I let her have a cupcake after dinner,” he says, nodding in concession. “But, hell, if she isn’t so easy to love.” “Confusing, isn’t it?” she asks, to which he hums in agreement. “One minute, you want to pull your hair out because she’s acting like you’re torturing her when really you’re just trying to put her shoes on-” “But then the next she’s hugging you and telling you she loves you?” he finishes with a smirk. “Exactly!” she says, throwing her head back in laughter. “But like you said, she’s just the sweetest thing ever. Really intuitive, too. You’d think at her age, she wouldn’t understand when you’re having a bad day, but then just when you’re feeling really down, you get a random hug from her…” She sighs, looking off to where Isabel is. “And suddenly everything doesn’t seem so bad.” He follows Natasha’s line of sight, smiling when he sees that Isabel’s turned her attention to some flowers, before turning back to her. “We made a pretty good kid, didn’t we?” Her green eyes are brimming with pride as she looks at him. “Yeah,” she says, “we did.” He does not respond with words. Instead, he just holds her gaze as they share a smile, because truly, what else is there to say. If there’s anything these last few days have proven, it’s that when it comes down to it, Isabel is a reminder that despite everything that’s gone on between them in the last few years, all the hurt that they’ve unintentionally caused one another and the distance they’ve placed between them – physically or otherwise – they’ve always made a great team. And though the thought comes unbidden in his mind, he finds himself wondering how different things could have been if he had worked up the courage to tell her how he felt back then. But more importantly, for the first time in so long, he allows himself to question whether or not he was wrong to hold back. Before he can give the thought any more consideration, though, Isabel makes their way to them, climbing into Natasha’s lap. “Hey, you,” Natasha says, looking away from him to wrap her arms around Isabel and kiss the top of her head. “Tired?” Isabel shakes her head, resting her cheek against Natasha’s chest. “No.” “If you say so,” Natasha says, chuckling under her breath. “Do you want to grab dinner?” he asks. “I saw a Thai restaurant across the street. We could see if their Pad Thai compares to the one in the Village.” “I would love to, but despite what this one says, she’s probably going to pass out soon,” Natasha says, and as if to prove her point, Isabel’s eyelids begin to flutter. “But how about you just come over to mine?” she then adds, her smile almost shy. “I don’t have Pad Thai, but I can whip us up some pasta.” “You cook now?” he says, his brows all but shooting into his hairline. The glare she sends his way is sharp, but it lasts only a second as she begins to laugh. “I’m not sure I appreciate the disbelief on your face.” “No, I believe you…” he trails, grinning when she raises a brow at him. “I just remember having to put out a bacon-related fire in your apartment once upon a time.” “You accidentally leave the burner on while you go to answer the door one time and some people never let you forget it,” she says, rolling her eyes before she joins him in snickering. When their laughter tapers, she tilts her head to the side. “So, what do you say?” “I say to see is to believe,” he says, dissolving into laughter once more when she picks up one of the stones in the pile between them and chucks it at him. “I’m kidding! I’m kidding! I’d be honored to taste your cooking… and not have to put it out afterwards.” She scoffs, but he can only really beam at the expression of mock hurt she makes. “You know what, Rogers.” With Isabel slumbering peacefully in her car seat, their cab ride back to Natasha’s flat is steeped in comfortable silence. London after dark is breathtaking, but even as the stunning view passes him by, he finds that he can only focus on how felicitous this – the three of them coming back from a day well spent – all feels. He steals a glance at Natasha on the other side, her face lit only by the streetlights, but even so, the little smile on her lips as she looks out her window brings a smile to his own. As if sensing his stare, she turns, her smile only widening when she catches him looking, and he can’t help but wonder if today has felt as good for her as it has for him. His lips part to ask the question, but before he can, the cab rattles as the driver runs over a bump. Like a reflex, he reaches out to make sure Isabel stays in place, his hand colliding with Natasha’s as she, too, does the same. They both nod at the cabbie’s subsequent apology, and the rest of the way, he does not bother to utter a word about how their hands remain atop of one another’s, nor does he ask questions when their fingers somehow wind up intertwined – but, and perhaps more saliently, neither does she.

When they arrive back at Natasha’s flat, he lifts Isabel to him, paying the driver as Natasha collects the car seat and Isabel’s bag and they walk up the stairs to her front door. It’s only when they’ve made their way inside her foyer and she’s taking her keys out of the lock that he realizes her lights were already on when they entered. “Were you expecting someone?” he asks, turning to her. “Not that I remember,” she says, mirroring his concerned expression as she takes in her already lit foyer. As if on cue, they hear the sound of her cupboard being pushed shut, and hurriedly, she begins to make her way towards the sound. “Natasha, wait!” he says, his voice thick with worry as he follows her with lengthened strides. “There might be a-” “What are you doing here?” he hears Natasha ask as she enters her kitchen. Confused, he follows her, stopping by the doorway when he sees her arms around a man, his hair dark as night and his frame towering over hers. “I haven’t seen you in days!” “Had to pull another double shift,” the man says, his voice smooth as silk. “Luckily, my colleague was nice enough to relieve me a couple hours early, so I stopped by the supermarket and did some food shopping.” “You’re a lifesaver,” Natasha says, and he catches himself looking towards her kitchen island where an array of fruits and vegetables are sitting along with a six-pack of Stella and a bottle of Beluga – her favorite vodka. “Oh, Loki, this is Steve.” At the sound of his name, he looks up just as Natasha and the man – Loki, he reminds himself – turns to him. Loki smiles, moving around the island to extend a hand to him. “Pleasure to meet you, Steve.” “Likewise,” he says, shifting Isabel to free his other hand before shaking Loki’s. “I’m sorry, I-” His words are cut off when Isabel stirs, letting out a little whine. “Shh, it’s okay, sweetheart. We’re back home.” Isabel lifts her head off his shoulder, her forehead wrinkling as she grimaces, and quickly, he rubs her back soothingly. She turns in his arms, and when her eyes land on Loki, it’s almost on instinct that he holds her closer to him. “It’s okay, fig. It’s just momma’s-” “Yo-ki?” Isabel says, her eyes lighting up with recognition. Before he knows it, she’s squirming in his arms, signaling to be let down. He obliges, staring dumbfoundedly as Loki bends down and Isabel runs into his open arms. “Yo-ki!” “Hello, love,” Loki says, laughing and picking Isabel up as he stands. “I missed you! Did you have a marvelous time today?” “Indeed she did,” Natasha says, and his head whips towards her to see her walk towards Isabel and Loki to tap Isabel’s nose. “I was actually about to make some-” “Actually, Natasha,” he interrupts, his eyes going from Loki, to Isabel, and then to her. And though he does not remember reaching for it, he holds up his phone. “Something just came up with the gallery. I’m going to have to pass on dinner.” “Oh, okay…” she says, blinking in surprise. “Something major?” “No, um… just a misunderstanding,” he says before shaking his head. “You have that thing tomorrow at three, right? I’ll be back before then to pick up Izzie.” “Right, yeah…” she looks at Isabel, lifting her out of Loki’s arms to place her down. “Say bye to Daddy, Iz.” As Isabel walks towards him, he bends down to give her a hug. “Bye, fig. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” “Dada, no!” Isabel says, stepping away from him. “Stay.” “But it’s almost your bedtime, sweetheart,” he says, rubbing his hands up and down her arms consolingly. “Daddy will be back tomorrow, okay? I promise.” Isabel’s bottom lip begins to quiver, but before the waterworks can begin, Natasha bends down next to them. “Izzie, baby, why don’t you show Loki the cookies you decorated, huh?” “My goodness, you decorated some cookies?” he hears Loki say, and he’s relieved when Isabel turns towards Loki, a smile forming on her face as she nods. The second Isabel begins to walk towards Loki, he gets up, turning away from the kitchen and making his way towards the front door. It’s only when he has one hand already on the knob that he hears Natasha call out to him, and he turns back to see her standing a few feet away, her eyes wide as she stares at him. “Steve…” she says, her eyebrows furrowing. “Is everything okay?” “Yeah,” he says, lifting a shoulder in a shrug. “You have nothing to worry about.” He nods curtly. “I’ll be back for Izzie tomorrow.”

He does not wait for her reply as he twists the knob and walks out, shutting the door behind him before all but running down the stairs. His footfalls are heavy on the concrete, but he does not dare look back as he makes his way down the block, ferociously trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his gut and the ache slowly but surely burning through his chest.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5

#Romanogers #After All #A Little Favor #Steve Rogers #Natasha Romanoff #AU #fanfic #natrogers #natrogersfics

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