can't stop thinking about those skeleton lesbians (pt 1)

my father told me he read it, but he hasn't read it. that's okay. my friends keep picking the words out of my throat.

someone once told me that the more trigger warnings that go on a book, the better it is. i didn't mean to write something with so many conditional phrases - i was writing about what i felt while being a human. sometimes you are a person and sometimes you are a statistic. sometimes it is falling upwards and sometimes it's sliding back down again.

my father tells me that it will be difficult to get people to read it. i didn't like the idea of a singular genre. i'm not going to lie to you - it is actually a difficult book to get through. i change the rules in it. it's not poetry or prose explicitly. it's neither false nor reality. i give you the tools to "solve" the book, but i let you do the thinking. my father says people don't care to think. i don't know about that - i think we just, like, enjoy reading.

the thing is - i was tired of stories about survival where someone with depression goes to therapy and wakes up okay. i didn't live like that. i was tired of books about violence, where the gore of what i experience was splashed in glitter to lick off the page. like, i was a person, you know? i had a life and a job and a family. and in books, i watched my story get ripped up so people could explore the viscera of my body. so they could feel good. my brother once called it inspiration pornography. we had walked out of a suicide-prevention seminar, both of us disgusted while the increasingly-elated presenter kept listing methods-of. i remember the look on my brother's face. like i would tear that man apart given the right time and place.

my father says that kids these days. he warns me against writing about things that are too-serious. he says that they don't want it. i don't listen. he does make me take out a scene from the book where i go to church after having sex with a woman. it used to be the 7th scene in the book. i don't think he's read further than that, it rocked him too hard to continue.

it's a book about being queer. it's a book about being raised catholic. it doesn't have monsterfucking, i'm sorry. it's just about, like.

at some point you have to choose to stay here. and then you do have to stay here, which takes practice. this is about forming the habit. this is about what happens after you've already started doing the work. because, like. you keep going. you have to. and it's like. very imperfect.

i should make a post on instagram. i should make this announcement less bittersweet. but like -- i'm giving it you, specifically, because i think you know why i had to write it. you and me. this little community.

body's a bad monster. here's the link if you're interested in ordering.

King of Pentacles

imagine being obsessed with drawing your crush haha couldn't be me 💕

i really needed this to exist so i imagine the transgender mcr community could use it as well. happy pride month

[ID: text in the style of the black parade album cover. it says "hormone replacement therapy" in the blue, white, and pink of the trans flag. end ID.] (Credit to @friendlyneighborhooddisasterbi for the ID)

Sometimes... the world can be a little too much.

Kanaya things. I love pasta did you know

do you know that one barbie movie where seven rainbow fairies are sitting on thrones, being robbed of their power by the movie villain laverna? my point is; the LiB on five thrones all next to each other !!! maybe max at their feet idk 👀

none of them know how to sit in a chair

Garden Date 💖💐🌼

Midzel hourssssssss 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

I don’t draw them often but WHEN I DO!! world better be ready

THE CUTESITS

home is where the heart is (and yours is gone)

Something about Holly painting is itching my brain. There is no right or wrong when it comes to it, it's all about perspective and self expression.

They would constantly be looking at Sheo for confirmation and he would be there like "You're doing great" without any further explanation, cause he just wants to see how far their own creativity takes them.

Guys...i don't think this is the worst thing i have drawn yet

Thought you've seen the last of Cateeva? I hope not! because at some point in my hiatus I thought about them in their first year

Ep.08.02- Slumber Party Mayorssacre