#i don't wanna be that guy anymore | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kindacreepy-kindaugly · 3 months

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Why do I still hate myself for not livin up to the person I used to pretend to be

#i don't wanna be that guy anymore #n it's not like anyone else wants me to be that either #except val maybe but fuck what he wants n also it was still never good enough for him anyway #or i guess it used to be. back home. long as i kept the act up at least.#wanted me to compensate w/ somethin else when i couldn't make him any more money i guess #but even when i put on my best damn performance to be what he wanted he found smth to pick apart #it's been easier than it used to resisting when i feel the pull again but....#i still feel like he was right about everythin. so now that i don't let him have me anymore i'm just a waste of space #still don't know if it's better this way or not #he wasn't always this fucking mean. i think he got worse here than he was back home.#i mean he was always an abusive piece of shit but. it wasn't impossible to keep him happy. just had to keep my head down n do what i'm told.#now if i seem too into it he'll just find a way to ruin it for me #he wants me to want him but not enjoy any of it. i'm supposed to hate every moment but still ask for more.#i don't fucking want that #so idk what it even is anymore that i think i'm supposed to be. i just know it's something else than this.#spdrvent

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cowardlykrow · 2 months

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Don't even look at each other before marriage

#You guys this took days to finish and i don't even know why OTL #now this was SUPPOSED to be a whole npmd main cast line up #but then i just... didn't wanna anymore haha so just these three :Bc #me realizing i wrote Save instead of Leave: :is big failure 😔😔😔#Hatchetfield #peter spankoffski #stephanie lauter #grace chasity #NPMD #nerdy prudes must die #starkid #taping my mouth closed to prevent the infinite complaints i have for this

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iero · 1 year

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Gun it while I’m holding on

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maddgical-boy · 11 months

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i feel like we don't talk about how much madd distorts your sense of identity, especially if you have a paraself that is meant to be the person you want to be and/or cannot currently be. when i look at myself in the mirror i almost don't recognize myself because That's Not Me that's just like. idk. some meat suit i need to be alive on earth??

#OK JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR BC TUMBLR HAS ISSUES WITH PISSING ON THE POOR HERE #when i say ''i feel like we don't talk about'' i mean as in ''i have not seen it mentioned'' and not like ''this is obviously universal''#no blanket statements are being made here. the blanket is for me and i am snug and cozy in it #maladaptive daydreaming #madd #it's like superman and bizarro except irl me is the bizarro one. i am bizarro jerry. i am kevin #especially if you're trans and your paraself is the gender you wanna be then it's like DAMN who am i anymore. some guy?? nah #mark stops daydreaming for a sec.txt

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zeherili-ankhein · 2 months

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I think I will start making Chhota Bheem incorrect quotes.

Because nobody else does...

#seriously i need more people on the chhota bheem fandom #where are all the people who watched chhota bheem as a kid??#do you not like it anymore?#or do you guys just don't wanna have a fully functioning fandom just because its a cartoon?#bheem bheem bheem chhota bheem chhota bheem #chhota bheem #desi people #desi teen #desi shit posting #desi humor #desi indian #desi tumblr #desi tag #being desi #desi life #desi #chhota bheem incorrect quotes

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dogboner · 24 days

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personal growth is crazy because it seems like nothing has changed until you're crying because you don't want to die. you learn something about yourself that ten years ago would have actually killed you, and now you're thinking about what you can do to heal and make peace with it. nothing may have changed to you, but to the person you were however long ago, you are the "it gets better"

#guy who's very proud of how well he's handling things rn lol #anyways personal time:#but idk man i kinda remembered smthn from my past n #like. if it wasn't for how much effort i've put into my mental health n coping skills #n my support network now #idk id be in a much worse place.#so i'm gonna forgive myself for not really sleeping last night #n having a hard time with my bpd feelings n emotions #because fuck man! i'm doin really good actually!#growth doesn't have to be oh man i'm never ever sad anymore #it's just. idk i don't cry because i Wanna die anymore #sometimes i have an intrusive thought of suicide #and it makes me cry because i DONT wanna die. and i know those thoughts are not good or needed #but i'm not gonna beat myself up for having them. i'm just gonna be patient n gentle w myself #n give myself time #n everything will be okay(:#bc it is okay! it's in the past and i'm safe now. and i wanna make other people feel safe too #growth starts w baby steps. n that's why it's so hard to recognize in yourself a lot of the time #it goes slooooooowly. for me at least lol.#mine #despite everything i am happy because i know my life now is one i love (: and one im actively trying to better for myself

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eff-plays · 1 month

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AA girlies want to choke on Astarion's dick and get slapped around by him because that's true love.

Spawn girlies want to wrap him in 7 layers of bubble wrap so he doesn't hurt himself thinking too hard.

Cool girlies flush him down the toilet and watch him swirl around in the bowl because he's finally where he belongs.

#yes i have opinions like any person but at this point i can't be fucked to articulate them anymore #i have opinions but i'm not dying on any hill anymore because frankly that guy is a bunch of pixels #and i'm tired of pretending he's important #if i wanna take a metaphorical piss on him then i will #cuz that's what fandom and fic is for #and if you have problems with people's fic you don't bully them or let them know you take that shit to your private chats and discords #and clown on them in the privacy of your own home where it won't reach them #*continues to write my tav/astarion fic*#bg3 #astarion discourse #astarion #followers don't worry i'm just goofing<3 you know me i'm a real goofball

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raiiny-bay · 3 months

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finished dhes & kel's character pages so here are the lil edits i made for both of em :-)

#myedits #kelly #dhestyn #ik i posted kel’s already but now i am posting both pictures together #i have read through the bios so many times atp that i don't even know if they make sense anymore #i cannot look at them again #i'm just gonna say they're good enough #i might change some stuff here & there but for now #i am over it lol #i'll probably do the rest of the characters eventually..........#maybe...........#but idk. i only really post the boys here so like. yea. yk.#plus i still have the mbz character page to do #which. that has like. so many characters on it. it's a daunting task #i hope the boys' pages are at least somewhat coherent. i tried to be concise & to the point. uh. idk if i was successful in that #but. n e way. i have a few edits & writing things i wanna work on so. character pages are moving to the back burner #i may or may not finally start writing the 90sAU #which btw ty guys for being so nice on that edit???? the comments & tags were all so sweet?????#i really liked that one so i'm glad y'all liked it too

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joyflameball · 3 months

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Why was Meatly surprised that Sammy so popular he's literally skinny canonically blonde shirtless has suspenders ties you up tries to kill you and is tragic what did you expect people to NOT wanna fuck him

#cassie rambles #like bro i'm literally a lesbian AND aroace and i can figure out why people were insane about him #bendy and the ink machine #like in 2017 you dropped into the world a guy who was built to be a tumblr sexyman #of course he was popular like this feels so fuckin obvious #have you seen one tumblr sexyman. tumblr loves their skinny white boys who wear suspenders #if you give tumblr a guy who is so clearly tumblr sexyman material they're gonna wanna fuck him #meatly people were so obviously gonna wanna fuck him. meatly.#sammy lawrence #meatly voice why is this guy who is so obviously fuckable so popular #I SAY THIS AS AN AROACE LESBIAN LIKE TO ME PERSONALLY SAMMY IS LESS FUCKABLE AND MORE SOGGY WET RAG #DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T SEE “OH YEAH OF COURSE PEOPLE WANNA FUCK HIM”#COME ON PEOPLE #it's five am #btw none of this is meant mean-spirited this is all in good fun #i am also a sammy fan (i just think he's really interesting and has thus far been shamefully underutilized)#(meatly don't fuck him up in the cage or i'm swallowing your teeth whole)#(meatly this isn't a joke anymore if you fuck sammy up for the third time i'm gonna come to your house and put your head in a toaster)

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aboutyoutoo · 1 month

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one of my friends from back home joined a drag king group and is always posting pictures of her at events and stuff with other cool lesbians/bi women and i'm so happy for her but also like. when's it gonna be my turn kshs......

#like don't get me wrong i have amazing friends at uni #but i have like no other gay/bi women in my circle #or like. one of my flatmates is bi (?) but longterm with a guy so i can't rlly relate.#and i just. ughhhh i wanna hang out with cool lesbians all the time #i know on here i do nothing but man-post akdjs #but outside of my rudolf-posting i'm so much more into women and don't touch irl men anymore and i neeeeed people that i can relate to. pls #and not just my flatmates that r always talking about the real life men that they're with ksdh...#personal

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koumeowkami · 6 months

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oh guys we are NOT surviving this

#I WANNA KMS SO BAD !!!!!! STOP THIS MADNESS RN !!!!!!#if you guys don't hear from me anymore you'll know why. i might need two weeks to recover #paralive

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peribytes · 10 months

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THE BITCH IS BACK, BABES !!

#NEVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE ANIMAL IS OUT OF HIS CAGE. THE ANIMAL IS FREE.#FUCK THAT PLACE. SHITHOLE OF A PLACE #i have a word or two for my doctor and it starts with F and Y #i got no help. zero. whatever they said i have already learned from the internet. lol.#also my anxiety was so bad in there i lost 4 pounds from a poor appetite.#and they gave me fuckin. lithium #my parents were SO MAD when i told them over the phone #anyway #i'm home and i couldn't be happier about it #just the thought of being trapped in that place makes me wanna vom <3 #oh yeah i was put in the detox unit instead of the one for mental disorders or whatever it is #my dad was very mad i was put in with the alcoholics and drug addicts but they were very nice people #i was able to come out of my shell and have conversations with them pretty easily #that is the ONLY positive thing i can say about my entrapment #i missed you guys so much. i really missed my family #god and now they're gonna call me tomorrow morning to talk about whateverthefuck #and i gotta call my doctor in a week #god i don't wanna talk to these people anymore. LEAVE ME ALONE

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watermelinoe · 6 months

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my niece once got upset w my dad bc he wouldn't buy her some overpriced drunk elephant skincare product. she was freaked out about getting wrinkles. at age eight. i wish her mom had never bought her that damn smartphone

#idk if my brother is dad of the year or anything but he didn't want her to have the smartphone so points for that #her mom bought it so she could track my niece whenever she's with her dad (my brother) and text her constantly #and considering she's so petty that she made my niece leave an easter gathering with a terminal family member early it's like #i'm sure she has her side of it and my brother was probably a dick somehow but girl you're punishing an eight year old about it #and i really don't think shit like ''ice age is for boys (so i won't watch it)'' came from my brother #i'm sure i'm biased bc it's my brother but genuinely i think she bought my niece that phone to spite him #and now she's just glued to it bc that's what smartphones are designed to do !!!!#you would really fuck up your own kid's attention span and self esteem just to get back at your ex???#and this isn't even the worst parenting move on her part but luckily that guy died and can't be around my niece anymore ever <3 #but i just worry about her. since i moved away i don't really get to see her.#and not to be narcissistic but i feel like it's good for her to see women w short hair no makeup comfy clothes etc.#i wanna be a good example for her #i told her she should just worry about washing with soap wearing sunscreen and drinking lots of water #i just can't relate at all. at her age all my friends were boys and i was into dinosaurs and pokemon and werewolves #a lot of girls... didn't really like me 😔 i remember being upset bc one girl called me a tomboy #anyway if u read all this. secret radioactive kiss just for u. mwah 💚

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cautiously0ptimistic · 1 year

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I received an anon a lil’ bit ago asking to download a female sim, and in true me fashion, I went overboard and made three instead.

Gotta give the people options, right~

I figured this was a great opportunity to express my gratitude for the kindness, generosity, and undying support this community has continually shown me over the years (especially recently), and though a sim dump isn’t much, hopefully it conveys my love and appreciation, even just a little.

DL on Mediafire (ad-free): Raven | Jessica | Bea

All credits go to the CC creators who helped bring these lovely ladies to life!

Each of their downloads includes a singular everyday outfit, and is roughly averaging around 500 mb+ each (I warned y’all that I have no self-control in CAS), so I would definitely consider the limits of your PC/laptop before hitting that download button.

Otherwise, there are no limitations as to what you can do with these sims. They are, by all intents and purposes, base sims, and I made them with the intention of being molded and shaped by every individual to fit their needs. However, if you like them how they are, that’s cool, too!

I can’t wait to see what you guys do with them! Feel free to tag me @cautiously0ptimistic so I can see whatever shenanigans they’re up to in your games! Happy simming!💛

#ts4 #ts4 sims #ts4 sim dump #sim dump #sim download #alpha sim dump #ts4 alpha #my sims #i tried my best to clean up my cc prior to this but i'm p sure some merged packages are still trapped in there #i apologize lol #but they're also just chock full of presets and sliders and alpha everything so #don't ever underestimate my ability to overdo it lmao #anyway #I hope you guys like them!#I don't often make new sims for leisure anymore #but i had a ton of fun making them #let me know if there are any issues with them #I have NOT updated for the infants patch so...do with that information what you will #might wanna run them through some batch fixes before you throw their cc in your game

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grey-has-rusted · 2 months

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what they don't tell you about life is that it's hard. woe is me

#ramblings #yes. i logged onto tumblr just to complain.#i have not been having a good time irl </3 #guys am i cooked? i wake up everyday with a heavy sorrow in my heart.#i am sad all the time even though i enjoy the wonders of life.#i laugh and smile and talk and learn. but im still sad.#it also doesn't help that i have psychotic tendencies and episodes #'go for a walk. that's a healthy coping mechanism' bro i can't even go outside bc i will get lost and walk for hours and almost-#unintentionally kill myself #it sucks. it all sucks and i say things that don't make sense either. apparently. allegedly.#i just want a functional brain. i would be so unstoppable if it weren't from my brain maybe i could actually function like a normal person #and hold down a job and be consistent with my hobbies and passions and actually maintain friendships #ong ive been so lonely too #i haven't bothered making friends anymore bc i know i won't be consistent and i dont wanna waste anyone's time #that's just really unfair #and i rely so heavily on videogames and fiction to get me through the day #bc it makes me feel less lonely. yeah i know i sound lame 💀#anyways- see y'all in another year when i remember tumblr exists

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archiephd · 1 month

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some of y'all care way too much about your constant accessibility to entertainment goddamn

#j.txt #people in real life: oh i can't watch these guys anymore :( sad. anyway this grilled cheese is so good. i should rewatch wonka #like. i get being upset but some of y'all rly wanna fuck up their lives cause they fucked up your..... friday night #sorry but who cares 😭#people are like read the room look at the state of the world!! and then say the most vile shit cause they can't watch a yt channel anymore #like i'm sorry but ??d??? don't you have more important things to scream online about. due to the state of the world #feeling very. out of touch out of time boomer style rn #like sorry but who cares!! coming from someone who cares a little and was kinda sad. Who Cares #ok i'm done. hopefully #was fully prepared yesterday to see the news and keep scrolling but goddamn #yeah this is about watcher entertainment lol

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