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sessakag · 19 days

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Hi! I'm really curious about your writing process because you're writing so many stories simultaneously which i think is really impressive. 💖 Do you already know what's gonna happen in the story such as the ending? Do you outline the plot before starting a story or is the plot decided as the story goes? Do you also forget what happened in the previous chapters so as that you have to reread them before writing the next chapter?

My writing process can be summed up in one word: chaos.

Absolute chaos, no joke. I am always all over the place, bouncing from one fic to another, files everywhere, folders everywhere, docs everywhere, like omg, its so disorganized on my side of the fic but its like a disorganization I can navigate quite easily most of the time😅and yes, I write a lot of stories simultaneously, but its on a bigger scale than folks see, lol. I've been working on 8 unpublished stories at once alongside Prey and Butterfly for the last month or so🤔my brain is just always going, and it switches from one thing to other, sometimes within minutes, sometimes days, sometimes hours, and then I get super fixated on whatever has my attention at the moment and the words just come pouring out of my brain😅I do take breaks when my hands and wrist start to ache, though that only makes me think of more stuff to write about.

I usually have a very clear vision for my fics, they're like movies or tv shows that I live through and experience inside my head, but the majority of the decisions on how to get to point A to B are made on the fly and I do not constrain myself if the story takes me somewhere other than the "clear vision" lol. I'm allergic to following guidelines. I just can't write like that, I have to like, feel the story as I write and if I can't experience the feeling of it then I go a different route, planned or not. it's hard to explain it without sounding like a crazy lady😅but yeah, I'm all feels and instinct with my stories, not much deliberate structure, though I have tried that before, and I was bored to tears and started dreading writing. Prey is a prime example of this. I planned on writing it one way, Prey!Naruto told me no🤭

I know how just about every single one of my fics are going to end already. I may not know how I'll get there, or what will happen in between, but I do know for a fact how they will conclude(unless the story demands a different end, but it's not likely to happen I don't think). I've already written the end for Butterfly, Monster, A Cure For Love, Prey, Dirty Little Secret, most of my unpublished fics and partially finished Secrets but I'm iffy on that one since I'm torn in two directions on how to conclude it. Once I get to the sequel I should have a better feel for it. But yeah, the end of these stories are already ready, they're just waiting for me to get there😂probably one of the reasons why I linger so much on fics so much🤔I already know they end and wanna have fun until the party's over🤭

I do forget things sometimes and need to re-read my stories, though for the most part, my fics are like movies I've seen a million times and I remember them just fine. I mostly re-read to pick up the momentum I had before I left, or to "get back in character" with the characters in the fic. Like if I've been writing Prey for an extended period of time, and then want to go to a fic where Naruto is more in line with his canon self, I'll have to re-read the story to put that hat back on, or listen to music that's less idgaf trap rap and more Naruto OST🤭but forgetting what happened in the previous chapters nah, not really. Not unless I'm having an episode or something, lol. Then Idk wtf is going on🤭

Anywho, hope this answered all your questions, but feel free to ask more!

#ask #answer #writing process #chaos queen #writing #fanfiction #naruhina #naruto uzumaki #hinata hyuga #can this nonsense even be called a process?#idk #lol #whatev #😂

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otomiyaa · 3 months

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Ginnyyyy 😞

So like, I'm not very ticklish all over, my sides are like 5/10 but I'm ticklish enough elsewhere. And I'm very good at holding back reactions, so all my friends just think I'm not ticklish 😔

The thing is, my thighs are so incredibly ticklish, I'm talking like 12/10, but it's not really a "normal" spot cause like you're not really just gonna grab a girl's thighs and tickle them, are you?

I'm guessing they're ticklish cause whenever anyone accidentally pressed on them I feel incredibly squirmy and like my whole face screws up and I just firmly grab whoever's hand it is, so I think they assume I was uncomfortable 🤨

I've never really been tickled there, so I'm just assuming they're ticklish and not just like, sensitive, but I'm curious as to what it's gonna feel like 😖

Um... Do you have any advice on how I can ask one of my friends to try and tickle my thighs? It's so awkward ahhhhhh 😭😭

Even though I feel incredibly awkward I'm the kind of person who's got the neutral expression all the time and speaks very nonchalantly so I can imagine whoever I ask is gonna be either very shocked or very teasing.

Sigh, do you even think this is worth it?

Ty for your time I'm so sorry 😭

Aaaahh, any advice, apart from... directly asking them? (what I would never dare to do but it is the best choice).

Hmmm, if you don't want to go the embarrassing route of simply asking them to tickle your thighs, then maybe:

Bring up the topic first. How? Maybe you can tickle your friend, are they ticklish? Try to be bratty? Provoke them?

If they try to tickle you, react like a non-ticklish person would react which might frustrate them. Then admit that you have found out recently that your thighs might be ticklish, and maybe your friend would like to try? That way the tickle fights can be fair again 😎

If it can't be brought up naturally because your friend doesn't try to tickle you / already knows you're barely ticklish on your sides etc. or if you are not a good ler (like me, hi), you can try to bring it up casually by for example referring to a YT video or an article you saw recently. Example below. Then say you kinda need your friend's help in confirming your tickle spots (OR SOMETHING).

Or back to the simple yet most embarrassing way, tell your friend the truth without stories around it: you've noticed your thighs get all tingly and are curious if maybe this is your tickle spot, and you'll need your friend's help to confirm it 😈

Sorry if that all sounds too fictional, I am a trash fic writer after all....

#tickling #tickle stories #tickle community

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twilightprince101 · 3 months

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I finished playing through all of Echo. Here are my abbreviated thoughts on each route, in the order I played them as well

TJ -- The most horrifying route. Kinda silly to say this in retrospect considering what happens in all the other routes, but seeing the slow decline in isolation to all the other shit going on, I was genuinely shook by the end. And I feel like I still am.

Carl -- The most gratifying/wholesome route. Felt weird going into this after TJ's since that formed my impressions of what this was gonna be, but it makes sense in retrospect. Carl's whole portrayal of anxiety and the conclusion he comes to, it's not something I see that often and it was a very pleasant ending.

Flynn -- The route that made me fall in love with Flynn as a character. Holy shit, this lizard rules. He acts like he doesn't care but he cares so so so much. Though Carl will always be best boy, Flynn will be my favorite character in the game. He deserves so much more. I now know to not be afraid of my sleep paralysis demon anymore :)

Leo -- The most cathartic route, and my favorite. I deliberately held off on doing this for a while, kinda fitting into that thematic thing of Chase not addressing his problems. But the choice that you need to make at the end and seeing the shit that happens, the realization that things will never go back to how they were. It is painful and it hurts but I know it is for the best. Absolutely some of the best that Echo has to offer.

Jenna -- A nice sendoff. While I really liked Jenna as a character, I feel her route is kinda low for me on the enjoyment scale since the actual horror aspect never feels fully present, just tension. There are no doubt some absolutely horrifying moments (never before have I been so terrified of a walk cycle), but this route feels like it needs to be experienced last, which kinda makes it weirder to enjoy in isolation. It's the bow that ties everything up nicely, but it's hard to enjoy a bow without it being tied to something else. But overall, still a way to go.

If you're curious about any of this stuff, check out Echo. It deserves its spot as a cornerstone of furry literature. Just make sure to heed those content warnings tho

#echo #echo vn #echo project #twi talks #echo chase #echo leo #echo tj #echo jenna #echo carl #echo flynn #fuck leo all my homies hate leo #leo sucks. his route is great.

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stoopid-turtle · 7 months

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made-up thoughts about dd's gender presentation

Okay, the gender post! Honestly, dd's gender presentation is something I think about a lot (ok, I just think about everything dd-related a lot), so here's a post about it. A couple disclaimers on the way down though.

Gender is weird

Um, so gender is complicated and deep. I'm not gonna delve into that too much. Just know I'm not saying much about dd's gender identity, because that's too speculative for me and I don't tend to analyze how people might feel their gender inside.

So this is all about gender expression or performance. The way he presents himself to the world. This includes stuff like clothing, ways of talking, makeup, mannerisms, etc. Anything we can see when we watch him.

For those more into the advanced gender convo, yes yes, gender is a social construct and there's nothing inherent about, say, a tuxedo that makes it a "man's" outfit. Fully onboard with that. But for simplicity's sake, let's shortcut to acting as if we buy into how society genders random stuff so as to recognize that a tux is "male-coded" by just about every society in the present day. Everybody swims in these waters, and they perform their gender with the understanding of how their society assigns these arbitrary gender assignments, so let's just deal with that for this convo. /obligatory gender theorist disclaimer

East vs West

I'm in the US, and I fully recognize that there are different norms for gender in Eastern cultures. A lot of the things that read as "feminine" to Western eyes is more neutral in the East, such as long hair or makeup. (I've read a fantastic tumblr post that went into this in-depth but, alas, I can't find it now. You will notice throughout this post that I am extraordinarily bad at refinding things)

On top of that, idols, in specific, often have quite feminine stylings to Western standards. In the East, the vibe I get is that idols are seen as more androgynous (though still threatening to some forms of masculinity).

I can only speak from my own very westernized perspective, so take it with as much salt as you want. I reserve the right to change my mind about everything later, anyway.

Basically, I have 3 main points here, starting with:

1. DD's early styling was more femme than he would ordinarily gravitate to

There's a moment I think about a lot. This one, specifically, set a month and a half after UNIQ's debut. The band is on a Chinese talk show and the host enthuses about them.

(also, baby DD rapping Love the Way You Lie is just....well, it's a thing that happened) (some US context: Love The Way You Lie was an Issue Song pointedly about domestic violence with Rihanna - an artist who had been a victim of a highly publicized dv assault - as the chorus singer and Eminem - a rapper with a history of misogynist lyrics (with a song about murdering his ex-gf) - doing the rap. It had a weirdly sexy music video with that lotr guy and was also a thing that happened)

DD is 17 years old here--a baby--and he's, frankly, adorable. He notes that he's been training for 4 years (I'm so curious about what idol training looks like, tbh), which wows the host.

But the part that I think about a lot is when the host expounds at length about how beautiful and like a girl dd is. DD has a girl's hairstyle (i've had that exact hairstyle at multiple points in my life), and the host says at various points that he's "more beautiful than girls", that girls will envy him, that he is very very pretty, that if she were a man, she would fall in love with him. The basic upshot here is that much is made of his feminine looks, and I get the vibe that his styling is more femme than typical, even for an idol.

At the same time, I think about this moment of dd in a dance competition in 2011, before his debut. DD's main passion has always been dancing, and he went into hiphop dancing, as shown here. He also attempted breakdancing while younger, though an early injury apparently kept him from going that route (I swear I've heard this somewhere, but can't find where. Link me if you know).

DD was interested in the more macho-types of street dances. Hiphop isn't as dominated by men as breaking is, but it's still has more of a masculine culture than jazz or, you know, waacking.

I think a lot about a kid who wanted to spend his life dancing, who went through idol training to debut as the femme maknae of a group. It was a weird fit for him, and I think his movement away from that initial look reflects that.

At the same time, I want to go back to something I find significant about his talk show appearance.

When asked who is most popular among girls, everybody (dd included) points to dd. (A bandmate also jokes that dd is most popular among men). A 17-year-old kid who just debuted a little over a month ago with a femme style is already getting fawned over by fans and older female hosts. However weird it could be, it's gotta be a huge ego-boost at a formative time to get the positive feedback to that look.

I think (and putting on my speculation hat here) that this is important for dd's performance of gender as he gets older.

Which brings me to the next main point:

2. DD enjoyed his more feminine idol look bc he knew it made him attractive

I suspect dd came to some acceptance of the more femme styling (once he moved away from the white peony look) primarily because it got him so much fawning.

I imagine idol training goes into how to create a public persona for oneself, especially given how much idols are supposed to reveal of themselves. Letting fans feel that they're getting an intimate look at the real person, while still maintaining the privacy of their actual personal life, is a skill, and I expect it's second-nature to dd at this point given how long he's been in the industry.

This isn't to say that dd's fake or that the dd we see publicly isn't "really" him. But it is a carefully presented version of him that intentionally keeps his private life private.

There's really 2 periods where we probably see the most authentic, unfiltered dd: the early UNIQ days, when he was still getting the hang of the ent industry (though that's complicated in that he was also young and under pressure to perform a certain way and had not developed the skills/experience/cache to set limits, hence him doing a lot more cutesy stuff that he refuses to do as he gets older); and the bts footage for CQL, as he did not expect those to be so widely seen. Even the unscripted stuff like DDU and SDC allows for some intentional presentation of himself in a way the more candid bts moments did not.

That's a bit of a digression, actually, but it's important because I think this public persona, especially the idol persona, is more femme than dd would normally style himself (as in, how he would style himself if he weren't an entertainer). The result of this is that we see some contexts, such as the CQL fanmeetings where dd wears women's outfits, where that idol style is intentionally deployed. Part of the point of fanmeetings is fanservice, and dd's feminine presentation, linked as it is to his idol image, is wholly about pleasing the fans.

There's reason to believe that dd was never too much into those stylings because he intrinsically enjoyed them. He's said multiple times in interviews that he prefers going without makeup. This isn't too telling because, hey, makeup can be uncomfortable to wear. Especially stage makeup.

But there's an interesting compilation of interview clips where dd reveals his complete lack of even any interest in makeup, referring curious interviewers to talk to his makeup artist and explicitly associating makeup with women (I have looked everywhere for this. I swear I saw this compilation on YouTube but now I can't find it. This is unfortunate bc this particular video really made me think about dd's gender presentation). And of course, his attempt to do someone else's makeup was...adorable. This is not a guy who wears makeup for the joy of it. He wears it because it's part of his job.

This isn't to say that dd looks down on it. Not at all. We only have to look at his defensiveness of the idol look to gg during the bts to see this. I don't think he's at all bothered by makeup. He just accepts it as part of his career.

(I have a completely made-up story in my head about how gg's preference for no-makeup dd was a major romantic thing bc it's gg liking the real dd, not the idol persona that everybody else fawns over. And how, once dd realized that gg was paying him a compliment, it gave him big feels. This story is definitely not real)

This all is gonna lead me to my last main point:

3. DD's probably okay taking on a more masculine style now bc it fits more how he would naturally dress himself

Like millions of other people, I really dig the idol look. When I was doing my initial dive into turtledom and read about some of the Chinese censorship of idols in recent years, I was initially put out because...idol!dd!

(Ok, as a queer person, I also have big solidarity feels and stuff, but that's a whole digression)

But then I began obsessively watching browsing dd stuff on YouTube and I came around to thinking that while I love and miss idol!dd, I don't know that dd is too shook up over it.

In my view, dd sees that type of styling as a role to put on for certain performances. Now that it's out of style, so to say, he switches to something else. It goes along with some other career transitions he's making, such as focusing more on film. I think this may just let him go with a more "natural" styling (basically, how he would style himself if he weren't a celebrity).

(I do think he likes dyeing his hair fashion colors, but that's not necessarily gendered. He's had plenty of dyed hair looks that are still masc)

When I think of things like that...well, I still personally miss idol!dd because that look really works for me. But I'm not bothered on his behalf because I don't know that he feels particularly constrained by the idol crackdown (at least with regards to no longer being able to present with an idol style; there are other aspects of the politics that may feel constraining, but that's a whole other digression). If anything, it provides a good reason for him to move away from idol-dom in his career (which he'd have to do at some point as he ages).

To wrap this up, I've felt horrendously guilty that the first photo on this tumblr wasn't even of dd or gg, so i'm gonna end this with a photo of idol!dd. I'm not gonna say it's my favorite look, because it's just cruel to make me pick a single favorite. But this is one I think is pretty.

#bjyx #yizhan #i am once again wordy af #lemme tell you dd's thoughts on gender #maybe #okay i'm just guessing #only dd (and gg) really know #his tiny fake ponytail just works for me

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lastwave · 9 months

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Hello, if you have the energy, time and will, would you expand on the recent post you made on how people in fandom talk about the skills and how harry feels about them? Like, what kind of things people say are hurtful/inaccurate/uncomfortable, in relation to disco elysium?

I do not mean to pressure you to educate me on this topic, as it is not the responsibility of the affected to educate unknowing people just because they are affected, of course. I just have not found many sources discussing the microaggression regarding the way some people talk about the skillset in disco elysium and the way that they might differ from the general microsaggression about psychosis and systems.

I ask this because I am curious about the way other people experience the world (though I know I will not always get my curiosity sated and this might be a selfish reason) and I want to know what not to do or say in talks about the skillset or in depictions of the skillset in art or writing. I want to be able to discuss and use the skillset as a game mechanic, narrative device and characters in a way that minimizes harm to marginalized groups. I also know that venting or talking about frustrations can sometimes help make one feel better, (but I also know that that depends on the person, problem and the relationship between the venter and the person listening) so maybe this can help relieve some feelings? Those are my intentions with this ask.

I apologize if my careful wording is too overly careful or if this question in other ways causes you unnecessary strife. I just try to be a careful person when it comes to these topics. If you'd rather only respond to me personally instead of the ask, feel free to message me. Whatever way you wanna handle this, if it be publicly as a post, a private message or if you do not feel like you want to answer at all.

Whatever you choose, I wish you the best day that you can have today. Kind regards, Chromatophorium

hiii thank u for asking!

im gonna preface the system bit with whether or not harry & his skills are a system is never explicitly stated, so take this all with a grain of salt

the rest is under the readmore so i don't clog up peoples dashboards

so what gets me is a lot of works imply the skills are less as people than Harry. i understand where the assumption comes from tho, because a lot of media likes to purport the idea of an "original" alter, which isn't how the disorder works. harry is the current host, and he identifies with the body, but the host isn't any more or less person than the other alters.

& we know the skills have independent thought from harry and their own, even if some (or a lot) of them share similar goals (see electrochemistry and volition, two very different personalities w/ different thoughts on how to go about things, but share a goal of keeping the system experiencing joy, though echem has considerably worse coping mechanisms). hell, they even have different political affiliations (see different routes) and a method of coming to a consensus on information (thought cabinet.)

and, as implied in the name, the skills have different talents from harry. *harry's* talent is connecting with people. i interpret the red checks with other skills as trying to let another alter front. i know ive had moments where i've had to let a way more socially adept alter take over. this would be a slightly different conversation if he was implied to be polyfragmented, but hes not soo.

that's why im less inclined to believe theyre a delusion or supernatural thing (shivers excluded, shes definitely supernatural), bc on the most part the skills just act like people, and all display signs of did/osdd (amnesia, distinct personalities, dissociation, etc.) if u want i can make a separate post going into individual skills and how i think they fit how certain alters form, but thats off topic

ANYWAY. it irks me when people boil the skills down to "this is the one that wants good things and this is the one that wants silly things and this is the one that wants bad things" bc it really falls easily into the negative stereotypes applied to systems & by extension psychotic people

#morris #hugh txt #disco elysium

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thievinghippo · 10 months

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OKAY SO I HAVE MADE IT TO THE HALSIN ROMANCE SCENE

Specifically gonna talk about it behind the cut, including a couple of pictures for anyone curious what it looks like with a small race (3.5 out of 5 stars)

There will be so many romance scene spoilers behind the cut. Don't click if you don't want to remain unspoiled!

First off, I did not go the bear fucker route. Yes, my gal is a ranger, but for the first time? She wanted Halsin and Halsin only

With one big exception, my dwarf stayed a dwarf, which made me very happy. Here's how the first kiss looked

He's kneeling! That made me very happy. I kinda expected to have Penilyn standing on an invisible box like so many of the DA:I scenes, where I had to headcanon that Blackwall lifted Bethroot up

Lips are actually pressing together!

Still a dwarf! But we're pushing the boundaries a bit. Legs must be wrapped around his waist

No picture of when he goes down on Penny, cause I don't want to get flagged lol! But that was another moment where I was kinda brought out of the scene cause he's on his knees but my dude. In order to reach her private area for a snack, you need to get much lower to the ground

Am I the only one who thinks fucking naked against a tree is probably really uncomfortable? Luckily Halsin must think so too because he brought them down to the ground next

Kinda feels dwarfy here! I think I'm going to have to watch a human or elf scene and see the differences

But after all that? Their beautiful night together? He leaves her on the bedroll alone. This will be fixed in post (aka fic)

Back to act 3. I'm on vacation for the rest of the week, so I'm hoping to finish in the next couple of days. Then I will figure out everything that I missed!

#hippo plays bg3 #penilyn copperfoot #halsin

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mimzalot · 1 year

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started streaming Golden Wildfire! gonna reflect on the route as it unfolds, courtesy of your resident Claude enthusiast.

CURRENTLY PLAYING: Chapter 4

[document version]

if Three Houses glossed over the sort of wild situation that Claude has to survive every day in Garreg Mach then this route has started with a bang by opening with conflict at the Fodlan-Almyran border. bold move! and I certainly am endlessly curious about this impending intrigue - in fact I have spent the last four years (four years!) since Three Houses musing about Claude’s relationship to his home nations, and the nations’ relationships to one another, and what that conflict means for Claude and everybody else.

do I trust the writers with it? not really. am I gonna try and play it in good faith anyway? evidently. so let’s get into it~ 🏹

right off the bat I can tell there’s stuff in this route that’s gonna make me uncomfortable, sometimes in the fascinating and deliberate way, and sometimes in the “oh I feel like an accomplice to/victim of a hate-crime” way. this is not really a surprise when it comes to Fire Emblem but it deserves a mention regardless, as I think Golden Wildfire’s going to be a rollercoaster that will frustrate me as much as it intrigues me. I’ll have the additional challenge of having to articulate how I feel about it off the dome, as a biracial POC playing to a mixed-bag stream audience. so, in short: occasional yikes are inevitable.

but such is the price I pay for Claude. ahh Claude, my beloved. when first I played Three Houses I was drawn to the game by him, not expecting him to be everything I enjoyed in a character. other than just being generally *chefs kiss* impeccable, he also conveyed some nuanced mixed-race experiences rarely expressed in a lot of media I’ve engaged with. that he sprouted from a game that frequently overshoots its own political intrigue and bungles character resolutions like FE3H surprised me, but I was happy to pluck the fluff and dirt off my darlings and make the best of what had been provided -- a bizarrely relatable, endlessly complex nice young man having a terrible, no good, very bad time.

I already got a whiff of this from playing Scarlet Blaze first, and it’s vindicating to see Three Hopes elaborate on something I’ve been clawing at walls trying to convey since the first game: Claude is light-hearted, but his situation is not. it always blew my mind to hear people say that Claude was the “good vibes house leader” in 3H only to play the game and find a character that would flippantly laugh about threats on his life, occasionally mention that he exists at the hostile junction of two warring nations, and ultimately find himself in the impossible position of an anti-war leader operating during a war. across two nations. both warring. yes, yes, he’s quite a funny guy, but his circumstances are abysmal, and a big part of that agony comes from the role he occupies -- that which he is saddled with, and that which he takes upon himself.

this was not a position easily occupied, and I was delighted to find that Claude was intelligently portrayed as a character whose ideals had to bend to the demands of leadership, resulting in morally-grey decisiveness, diplomatic juggling, and one of my favourite things to explore in fiction: the pragmatic, sometimes paradoxical pursuit of “non-violence” during war, and as a solution to war.

already in Three Hopes (I played SB first) I sense they’re leaning a little harder on showing Claude’s struggle with this, including some hints at the unbearably high bar he sets for himself. he doesn’t wear accountability like Dimitri or Edelgard in 3H - it’s always a little more cavalier, something you have to read between the lines to spot and understand. but this game is a tad more forthright with it, pulling back the disguise of “Master Tactician” to plainly show Claude in a perpetual state of, well... this:

and nothing exacerbates this like the situation they’ve started the game with. it’s dramatic irony that makes the first three chapters really sting: we know by now that Claude is Almyran, and are placed in an uncomfortable position of puttering around the camp listening to the people Claude calls his friends talking at length about the brutish Almyrans invading at Fodlan’s Throat.

this is technically good set-up. Claude is here to fix a problem, and this is our first experience of the problem -- lacking communication and education means that neither side knows who they’re fighting, or why, just that they have to. with the Church of Seiros already positioned as a questionable but overbearing presence in ch. 2 (“Why are we being sent here to fight? Church school said so.”) it begs to reason that showing the consequences of Fodlan’s intensely insulated culture starts with these uncomfortable scenes. they are, after all, born from the fear of not knowing. Claude as an antithesis to ignorance-based conflict makes a habit of overcoming fear by knowing everything.

so there are some pretty ick conversations happening around camp, and that’d honestly be something I’d be fine to reckon with as a narrative choice -- if not for the visceral discomfort and sharp drop in faith that came in the form of Shahid’s introductory scene.

let’s get this out the way: I did not spend four years mopping my tears about all these Lords and Royals to see Shahid and not immediately think “bratty king? I can fix him, and/or make him worse.” especially as a foil to Claude, it’s interesting to see a foolish heir working towards the throne in a way that Khalid, and perhaps even the King of Almyra, would oppose. I’m bracing myself for his justifications, for his humanity, because he occupies an interesting political position and he’s the first family of Claude’s that we’ve seen on screen. and yes, he could just be shallowly evil, but that wouldn’t be anywhere near as fun as it being complicated and ugly, the way all the other Lords and Leaders are afforded.

alas, it is difficult to have faith that GW is gearing up to say something interesting when they introduce such a caricature of the ‘evil desert guy’ that I feel like I’m watching a Disney movie. especially when a scene shows a narrow-eyed, ashy-but-darker-skinned ‘evil’ sibling in contrast with our bright-eyed, lighter-skinned mixed-Fodlanian Claude. it’s these sort of artistic choices that threaten to undercut the same cross-cultural intrigue that this route is constructing.

the Three Hopes sprites are a bit awkward, proportionally (shout out to Margrave Gautier’s bizarrely wide mouth) but it’s a long and yucky history with depicting MENA people that makes this particularly egregious. I’m Samoan so not personally affected by this, but it is nevertheless going to take an active effort to just try to look past the way his character is drawn. I spare a wince of sympathy for my viewers that are more personally affected: it sucks, and it’s such a simple fix that it becomes even more frustrating.

he does look slightly less like a hate crime in the animated cut scenes though. “the only one who can beat me is me!” type rizz.

I actually like that his features might deviate from the typical proportions of most of our main cast, the way Hubert’ or Lorenz’s do. it is a shame to have it pushed just into the realm of caricature when there is something workable there.

nevertheless, 3H optics have betrayed themselves before (shout out, woman-enjoyers). so again, I’m going to try and brute-force past this icky design choice and try and find my bliss, which is thus: sibling drama, please, I beg. I love the garbage mish-mash of family dysfunction and political drama that happens in royal families, and it was high time that we saw a glimpse at what Claude’s other side is going through. I swear the British monarchy convinced people that wild dysfunction is reserved only for the English, but where there is power there is corruption, and where there is hereditary power struggle, by jove do you get problems -- it’s just a matter of flavour.

all that to say: I am hoping that we will be compensated for that abysmal talk-sprite with enough royal family intrigue to write home about. I would like to see Almyran politics that are just as complex as everywhere else, but culturally diverse and interesting without leaning lazily on the same fear-mongering racist rhetoric that Claude’s entire character exists to debunk. that’s my hope. my three hope. ha ha. look I’m not holding out hope for a diamond, I just kinda want a gem-shaped rock that I can polish up myself.

anyway, new spite-induced meow meow aside, let’s get back to Claude. my god! his life fucking sucks!

thinkin about this scene just before the timeskip where Claude expresses his thanks to House Goneril, and apologises for not being of more assistance. it makes my skin crawl knowing that Claude is not just thanking Holst but saying sorry to him after all the micro-and-macro aggressions he’s been weathering, but it makes a lot of sense; Claude is representing House Riegan and his grandfather, not Khalid of Almyra, and not even Claude himself. and what that shows is an important feature of diplomacy: the ability to make connections, and say what needs to be said in order to maintain good relations with his new allies.

better than that, it shows how damn good Claude is at it, despite having every reason in the world not to be. he is, in this moment, House Riegan. and with foresight, this is an interview, and this humble apology operates twofold as a promise, setting the tone for his eventual leadership and securing House Goneril as an ally.

if Claude were more selfish, more proud, more emotional or less wise, he wouldn’t be able to say things like that. it is the humility that makes people underestimate him, but it’s also what makes him so pivotal in creating and maintaining peaceful circumstances. sometimes, peace-keeping means pacifying the people in power. and especially for Claude operating in the alliance, managing expectations is key for a leader. he’s clever, this is strategic, and I’m excited to see Claude juggle the egos and roles of all the nobles around him.

but it’s tough, right? this is a situation that rewards Claude for not behaving like a human ought to. I like to imagine the way his smile falters when the Almyrans are spoken of like barbarians, agitation ticking along in the back of his mind while he forces himself to speak the niceties that will benefit everyone in the long-run. he’s only seventeen. we hear a lot about noble obligation, but there is no greater pragmatic noble obligation in Leicester than managing the other nobles, and Claude has that skill in spades -- hard won, but effective, with an eventual payoff to make all that juggling worthwhile. sometimes. maybe.

speaking of noble obligations, good lord that bit where Lorenz snaps that they must execute Tomas and Claude has to remind him that dead men don’t talk... I’ll inevitably end up talking plenty about Lorenz as the game goes on because he is a fascinating foil, so remind me later to talk about the things that make Lorenz a good noble, bad leader, and eventual good ally later.

and on the topic of fascinating foils...

man. I was not expecting Shez.

for those unaware, my read of Claude in 3H was that he mostly saw Byleth as a curiosity pre-timeskip, then brought them on as a means to an end post-timeskip. room for interpretation about how they develop after that, but generally most of my Byleth and Claude interactions boiled down to this thinly-veiled hostility and how it evolved into apologetic manipulation and mutual care.

Shez is different, right off the bat. I can see Claude working them over, but there’s something very new about the vibes of Claude approaching a peer he finds suspect. it has the same echo of how he treated Byleth, and even Marianne, but there’s a difference that I can’t quite put my finger on, and I suspect it comes from Shez just being a much more talkative character, plus the dramatic irony of vaguely knowing where Shez’s story might be heading. they’re not harbouring the goddess, nor a cursed beast, but a secret third thing :’l (and god I’m so excited to see what’s up with Shez, they’ve been impressing me as a protag since I started this game, I don’t think I’ve liked a FE avatar this much since Robin)

the way I characterised Shez has him coming off a little arrogant and brash, compared to my previous Shez, who seemed mostly daft and down-to-earth and is currently committing girlboss crimes in Adrestia in an alt timeline. I’m so used to overlooking the avatar character that I hardly realised just how much potential Shez holds in this route, as a sellsword brought onto the squad of the guy that wants to avoid bloodshed. honestly I’m pretty astounded by the raw fire of intrigue it’s set alight in my brain. Shez thrived under Edelgard because they always had work. and now they’re struggling under Claude, and we’re seeing just how vile the war machine is that it will make peace an inconvenience to the merc economy.

just before I finished the stream, I played the opening scene of the timeskip: where Shez is struggling to make ends meet by being a mercenary in a peaceful alliance. therein lies the intrigue of this pair-up. Claude wants peace. Shez needs to fight to live. so how do we reconcile this?

already it seems that Claude mmmiiight have just deliberately forced scarcity on Shez in order to easily manipulate them into a) not moving into a different nation when Claude still doesn’t know what’s up with him and b) taking up his first offer of becoming a commander, which is exactly the morally dubious pragmatism that I love to see in my Alliance leader - but who’s to say? it’s not as if it’s the same method he used to flush out Bergliez’s army in the SB route, forcing their hand by starving their troops with hopes they’d choose surrender...

guess we’ll find out next time, eh? but oh, is my spotlight shining on these funny little guys.

and quickfire round: Nader’s still lookin’ handsome, love that Claude’s opinion of Shez rises every time I side-eye the church, and Arval continues to enthrall my entire brain.

and. yeah. that’s a majority of my first impressions of the GW route. not even all of them but this is like an entire essay and I’m only just past the prologue. tl;dr more of the same Claude goodness, something new and tense in Almyra lore, and then something new and unexpected in Shez. and we’ll see where the rest takes us.

thanks for reading, all the best!

my streams | my twitter | ask to join the discord server

#golden wildfire #three hopes #fire emblem warriors: three hopes #claude von riegan #mimzameta #mimzamine

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thesarahshay · 1 year

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A Dorothy Sayers Primer

I initially wrote this for any Shipwrecked fans who loved Honeymoon Homicide and are now curious about Dorothy L. Sayers (the author Sinead named Tracey's fictional detective after) or Busman's Honeymoon (the Sayers novel that the script was inspired by), but it works for anyone who's curious about the Lord Peter Wimsey series! Here's some info to get you started.

For Shipwrecked fans: Busman's Honeymoon is the final book Sayers wrote in the Lord Peter Wimsey series, so unfortunately you can't start there (trust me, it'd be like watching the musical episode of Buffy first). Lucky for you, the whole series is delightful!

The elevator pitch: Lord Peter Wimsey, a wealthy and amusing English aristocrat, solves murders in 1920s and '30s London with his friend Chief Inspector Parker of Scotland Yard and his faithful valet Bunter. Why you should read it: Highlights of the series include Lord Peter's nonstop literary references (guy was basically an old-timey meme factory) and the fact that, more often than not, the books are about some bigger concept in addition to having a nice tricky mystery to solve. Topics Sayers tackled include everything from the place of women in society to the way countries fail their veterans.

There are three possible ways to read them, depending on your preference.

Read the series in chronological order. The best way, IMO! The first book is Whose Body and it's delightful, but I have heard some people say they found the earlier books harder to get into until after they had read the Harriet books, hence method #2. Admittedly, she develops Peter's character a lot over the course of the series, so the Peter we initially meet has a lot of growing to do.

Read the Harriet Vane books first. About a third of the way through the series, Lord Peter meets a mystery novelist named Harriet Vane, and their relationship is covered over four of the seven books that follow: Strong Poison (book 5), Have His Carcase (book 7), Gaudy Night (book 10), and Busman's Honeymoon (book 11). It is entirely possible to read just these four and feel you've gotten a complete arc.

Read the first book, and if you're not entirely sold, skip ahead to Strong Poison. I was talked into method #2 so I can't knock it, but I usually recommend #3 for people who aren't totally sold on the premise. At least give Whose Body a try, but if you're not feeling it and/or just want to get to the relationship stuff, read the Harriet books and then go back and fill in the gaps as you like.

There you go, more information than you possibly could have wanted! Now you can choose your method and get over to your local library to get started (btw, If you plan to go the audiobook route, I recommend seeking out the versions read by Ian Carmichael). EXTRA INFORMATION (aka I'm sorry I'm like this)

Content warning: It's the 1920s, so there's gonna be some racism, classism, fatphobia, and sexism. But if you've read Agatha Christie, this is mild by comparison. There are a few slurs and references to stereotypes, but when Sayers writes an actual minority character they're complex, sympathetic human beings. For my fellow Jews, be warned that the victim in Whose Body is Jewish, but it's not a hate crime and the Jewish characters are all cool.

Other works by Sayers: This primer is focused on the Wimsey books because they were her main writing output, and everything else she did kind of requires a caveat or is in a very different vein: she wrote some plays and nonfiction, primarily about Christianity, and a translation of Dante's The Divine Comedy which I understand is very well regarded. Her only other novels were all co-written with other authors, and in my opinion don't feel particularly Sayersesque. If you read all the Wimsey books and collections and want more, The Documents in the Case is decent. I haven't read most of the rest: I am a fan, not an expert!

A full list of the novels and short story collections in order (because I'm a completist, sorry not sorry):

Whose Body (1923) Clouds of Witness (1926) Unnatural Death (1927) * Lord Peter Views the Body (1928) [collection] The Unpleasantness at the Bellona Club (1928) Strong Poison (1930) Five Red Herrings (1931) Have His Carcase (1932) Murder Must Advertise (1933) * Hangman's Holiday (1933) [collection] The Nine Tailors (1934) Gaudy Night (1935) Busman's Honeymoon (1937) * In the Teeth of the Evidence (1939) [collection] Posthumous: Lord Peter (1972) [collection of all the Lord Peter short stories] Thrones, Dominations (1998) [novel by Jill Paton-Walsh**, using an incomplete manuscript Sayers started for a twelfth Lord Peter book; questionably canon, but worth reading] The Complete Stories (2002) [collection of all Sayers' short stories]

*The collections are listed in publication order, but the stories therein happen at different periods of Peter's life and can be read any time.

**Paton-Walsh wrote three more Wimsey novels after completing Thrones, Dominations, but they should be viewed purely as fanfic (I personally do not care for them).

#Dorothy L. Sayers #Lord Peter #Lord Peter Wimsey #Shipwrecked Comedy #Honeymoon Homicide #thank you for indulging me #I am a massive Dorothy Sayers fan and it pains me every day that she's so little-known #if you read all these books and still think Agatha Christie is the Queen of Mystery I will pay you $5

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k20spock · 7 months

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hey. hi bestie unfortunately due to the fact that i am very sensitive to horror i will not be experiencing slay the princess myself but if you want to tell me about it. i want to listen. for some reason hearing someone talk about horror does nothing to me its just the experiencing that kills me and I Want To Know. what do u have to tell me. i am so fucking curious

Hi bestie I am sorry in advance for how long this is gonna be.

So, slay the princess is a visual novel and it starts out with you, the protagonist (who from seeing his hands and hearing descriptions from the princess is some sort of bird person), being tasked by a narrator to go to a cabin in the woods and slay a princess that is being kept in the basement of said cabin. The narrator describes the scenes, tells you what to do, can be interacted with, and has a limited amount of control over both the environment and you. However, he can be resisted.

As you make your way to the cabin, you find out you have a “voice in your head” called the voice of the hero. They are a distinct entity from you and can talk to you and the narrator. They’re supportive of whatever you choose to do, but have their own opinions on matters.

You get to the cabin, and you have a lot of options. Slaying her right away, trying to save her, betraying her, leaving her in the basement without doing anything. You can even choose not to go into the cabin at all.

Talking to the princess doesn’t get you a ton more information. Her personality is different depending on if you meet her first with a weapon or not, and she does not remember her own name, how long she’s been down here, who put her here, or why she’s here. She claims not to know how to destroy the world and says she doesn’t want to anyway.

Whatever you end up doing (unless you get the joke good ending), you will die. If you slay the princess and hesitate, she kills you too, If you save her, the narrator takes over your body and tries to get you to kill her and she kills you in self defense. If you successfully kill the princess without dying, the narrator traps you in the cabin and puts it in a void while insisting you’re happy and this is what’s best for the world and everyone. You can only get out by killing yourself.

After your death, however it happens, you go on to chapter two. Which chapter two you get depends on what you did in chapter one. There are ten different chapter twos and in each of them, the form of the cabin and the princess has changed. You are presented with the exact same scenario, the narrator tells you to slay the princess. However, you, the voice of the hero, and a new voice that appears (depending on what you did in chapter one again) all remember that you’ve been here before and what happened last time. If you try to yell the narrator that, he doesn’t know what you’re talking about and insists it’s the first time you’ve been here.

Once again, you proceed to the cabin and whatever happens is dramatically different depending on which chapter two you have. The Princess can be anything, a skeleton made of knives, an evil catgirl, five princesses stuck together, a wild animal, or a typical damsel in distress. Sometimes, you can make choices in chapter two that lead to a chapter three which again comes with a new voice and a new more fucked up princess. If you’re curious about any routes in particular lemme know I’m not gonna elaborate here because we’ll be here forever. However, in every single one, a mirror appears in the cabin and the narrator insists he can’t see it and it isn’t there. Trying to interact with it makes it disappear.

Once you reach the end of chapter two (or three if you get it), the outside world will be replaced with a textured void vaguely resembling the area outside the cabin normally. The narrator disappears and a collection of hands will show up to take the princess. After this happens, the same mirror from earlier will show up and you have to look into it. Looking into the mirror and seeing yourself makes the voices go away, they are extremely frightened of it. You can comfort or mock them before you look.

After you’ve looked in the mirror, you’re able to talk to what took the princess, which appears as just a collection of hands speaking through the body of whichever princess you just met. You can talk to her, but you don’t get a ton out of her, whatever she is is very clearly weakened. you do learn that she is something called the shifting mound, she says you two are alike and are both weakened, and the princess is a being that changes based on how you perceive her. The shifting mound needs to gather more perspectives to find herself, and asks you to help her by bringing her more versions of the princess to become part of her. You can’t really refuse, trying to insist on waiting forever will just make her go oh ok bet and crash the game. So she makes you forget what just happened until you meet again and restarts the loop. Something that makes me insane is no matter what happened before this point the shifting mound will tell you “she asks to tell you to remember her. You won’t”. No matter what happened or how good or bad it was she wants to remember. Augh.

So you have to repeat the whole sequence four times, and you’re locked out of doing the exact same thing you did last time so you get different versions of the princess. You get to talk to the shifting mound between each run and learn a little more.

Finally, after you’ve run through five routes, you come face to face with the mirror again, only this time you don’t see yourself. You see the narrator, and can finally properly talk to him after all this time. Talking to him breaks the glass in the mirror until he’s gone because he isn’t meant to be perceived like this.

Talking to him gets you pretty much all of your answers. You and the princess/shifting mound were once the same thing, a god encompassing the totality of existence. You were split into two components, the long quiet (you), a god of stability, and the shifting mound, a god of change. However, the tear was imperfect, leaving pieces of you in each other.

The person who created the narrator wanted to rid the world of death (and therefore, change). It’s implied their world was on the brink of ruin. So they created this construct, a closed off space of reality, and tucked a piece of themself into the construct to guide you into slaying the princess and, in their eyes, saving the world.

If you refute him by telling him about how death is good and necessary, he’ll harshly tell you that you wouldn’t know, because you’ve never really died. All that really happened all the previous times you’ve died was that your consciousness just shifted to a different part of the construct. The narrator, however, is dead. He died before the story started. He is just the echo of his dead creator (it’s ambiguous where the creator and the narrator begin and end). He had to be dead because the princess changes based on people’s perceptions, and he’s so frightened by what she is he would have made her unstoppable. But an echo can’t perceive things the way people can. But there was no way to account for what you would do. Ultimately your will overrides his.

You’ll eventually run out of questions, and the mirror shatters completely, taking the narrator with it. You then witness the shifting mound awakening to her true self.

She’ll try to convince you to join her, to rediscover your godly self and become absolute reality together. If you resist long enough, each of the vessels you met on your journey will begin speaking to you, trying to convince you of the meaning they bring into the world with change and destruction.

Ultimately, you have a few choices. You can join the shifting mound in godhood, or you can keep resisting her. If you do that, at this point, the voice of the hero will rejoin you, though he says the rest of the voices are too mixed up to make it. The hero tells you he can take you to her heart, the cabin as it first appeared and the princess as you first met her. If you do that, you can slay her once and for all and create a new world without change or death, you can let her slay you and restart the loop, or you can choose to leave together as mortals, abandoning godhood and taking whatever comes next together. All of these options kick you in the teeth in their own ways.

so. uh. yeah. princess game. I’m really normal about it.

#asks #if you want me to elaborate on anything just ask

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rhythmmortis · 7 months

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imstill thinking. i want to know so much. Which is ur favorite trio. Ur favorite kh game. Favorite kh world. Whats ur favorite kh headcanon. Thoughts on axel

fave trio: this one is hard but im gonna have to go with wayfinder trio because aqua and terra my beloveds....... the autism duo........ (and also ventus is there and he's cool but i am more focused on aqua and terra because i have so many fucking thoughts about them. where did they come from. how long have they been training and how much do they know about keyblades and history since they were presumably studying. what specifically made them be chosen. i am so excited for their future in the series because AOUGHHH). since i think the series might be headed towards a shift in the 'light good darkness bad' mindset where light might serve as a slightly antagonistic role (what with the whole keykids fighting over light and whatever the fuck is up with MoM, also i think it would just be cool), i think aqua and terra and ven are kinda the perfect trio to explore that with. there's also them ACTUALLY dealing with the aftermath of bbs (since we never really got that!! and i wanna see how their dynamic actually is, how do they deal with the fallout of those events like terra killing eraqus, aqua not trusting ven, ven still technically being pure of heart?) and how aqua is gonna handle basically being the successor the eraqus (especially since aqua BECOMING a master and not terra was part of why shit fell apart. theres drama to be had (even though in bbs xehanort does call terra 'master terra', its just to trick him into trusting him more yes BUT xehanort is still a master. to our knowledge all it takes to name a master is another master seeing them pass some sort of arbitrary test and saying they are. yes xehanort is evil but he is still a master. making terra technically one too. and i wonder how he would feel about that title still, as its everything he wanted but thats how he got it)). i have so many thoughts on them all but it's very chaotic and disorganised so i will move on fkhfdkjh

fave kh game: bbs i love you so so so so much my beloved wonderful game!!! ive talked about this a bit before but bbs is very accessible for me to play since you can choose your own moves and commands so you have a good degree of customisation with how you play, you can choose if your finishers have QTEs (since my hands are kinda shit, i cant really do QTEs or input heavy things, so being able to choose if i want to or not is amazing), command board is actually quite fun and a fun way to level up commands without having to go into combat so you can take a break but still enjoy it, i enjoy the movement options and how varied they are between characters, and its easy to move between commands on the command deck (im looking at you ddd. why do i have to use the goddamn D-PAD). aside from actual gameplay, while the story is a bit clunky at times and theres DEFINITELY room for improvement, i still find it quite endearing and theres some REALLY fucking good moments in there i still think about so often. the fact that terra's final fight is a fight we as the player know he cant win but he fights regardless. and then sprouts a stupid little cape like its from a tissue dispenser for the sake of continuity. terra's voice genuinely cracking slightly when he's crying after he kills eraqus. aqua calling vanitas a freak. the extra chapters in the bbs novel that add so much depth to vanitas and ventus (which isnt in the game but its still so good regardless). the entirety of the secret chapter in aquas route. the vanitas remnant fight (you find what's left of this sad kid, beat him up, and steal his keyblade). good fucking game

fave kh world: for some goddamn reason this is also bbs worlds. what the fuck is wrong with me. it's either land of departure (which we literally know basically NOTHING about and i am so curious about it) or the realm of darkness SPECIFICALLY in the secret chapter.

(^one of many insane ramblings i sent to my friend after playing bbs again and again) when you first start the secret chapter, you're put in a place right after that scene on the bridge thing in the realm of darkness where aqua gets surrounded by the darksides. if you turn around, you can still see it slightly but you physically cannot go back. you can never go back. and being able to see it gives me this really weird feeling like im being watched or followed, and who's to say that she isn't!! the darkness is always lurking!! after that message i also mentioned that while enemies can drop potions and stuff, its never a guarantee and you are constantly fighting for even the smallest chance of surviving, if that can even be called surviving. your most valuable item that you have (if you have any left) are the ice creams that can trigger command style changes. disney world, the place you get them, is one of the brightest, happiest worlds, and once youre in the realm of darkness, you cannot get any more. you're essentially trading fleeting memories of a happier time as a desperate attempt to stay afloat (you can tell im a kh fan because im essentially thinking about A SECOND TRAGIC ICE CREAM). its a futile and tragic experience which, while 0.2 also has the realm of darkness, the secret episode has such a specific feeling to it i cannot stop thinking about

fave kh headcanon: this one is actually pretty hard because there's so many and i have been losing my mind over other things recently BUT. theres so many headcanons about physical appearance that i love (brown eyes for ALL please put those blue things away, freckles for sora, namine, terra, and a few others, XEMNAS WITH CURLY/WAVY HAIR which is from one panel in the days manga where he's just slightly distorted by water but like. its a good fucking idea, giving characters their normal skin tone back. im looking at you ssbu sora v kh1 sora. they took my boy's melanin (which isnt really a headcanon and more of a genuine anger at the whitewashing), scar headcanons for kairi and sora from where they died, etc). current favourite headcanon is either: aqua using more strategic fighting styles (with teleporation being a BIG part of her bbs moveset, like her unique teleport dodge, her ultimate finisher being teleport spike, and a unique command style being ghost drive) and that either playing into either her feeling detached from everything like a ghost (ghost drive) after being stuck in the realm of darkness for a decade or since these moves leave after images, maybe her developing a fear of isolation (or HERSELF especially given mirror aqua in 0.2), kairi also training with terra because i want her to fight like a fucking TANK instead of being more magic focused. i want her to kill (and if we get a rikai teamup, i think mage riku and tank kairi is such a fun idea), OR the current headcanon/connection of xion to the cavern of rememberance (i talked about it in the tags in this post), but i know theres so many ive had over the years that i genuinely cannot think of right now fkhfdkjh

thoughts on axel: the organisation's assassain. they chose HIM to be the babysitter. and then those kids said 'i could make him feel emotions after a decade of feeling detached from everything' and they did!! they gave him a heart!! but i LOVE thinking about axel during com and i think its the closest we'll probably see of his actual job as an assassain. he AIR FRIED A MAN (and i think in the manga he used his chakrams to physically attack instead). he 'betrayed' larxene and marluxia so easily. he wasn't afraid to go through namine to fight marluxia (that scene where marluxia uses her as a human shield, you can actually visibly see namine shaking in fear and rewatching some com scenes to get gif footage REALLY made me remember that its literally just Kingdom Hearts: Namine's No Good Very Bad Day) but he had NO hesitation. he ordered repliku to STRANGLE zexion. needless to say, this is all treated very casually for him that it makes me think what he mustve done during his time in the organisation to get the status as an assassain. he treats murder as an 'icky job', but on the flipside, when we see him actually care about something, it's just that same drive and motivation but used for his own personal goals (tracking down xion, following roxas in the kh2 prologue which is terrifying without context), but MAN. seeing him from a detached perspective without context is like 'holy shit this guy is scary' and then you play days or read the manga and anything else with him and you realise he's so sillies. wonderful guy 10/10

#kh #YIPPEE I LOVE GETTING ASKS THANK YOU AND I LIKE TALKING TO YOU WAHOO :D #apologies that this is far longer than i anticipated it seems i think about aqua or the realm of darkness or bbs #and black out and wake up to several paragraphs in front of me #long post

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citrus-cactus · 1 year

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Oof.

So, here’s a big ol’ braindump of thoughts now that I’ve finished the Digimon Survive Wrathful route…

(MAJOR SPOILERS under the cut!!)

So I’ll admit, the only thing I knew for sure going into this route was something bad happens to Saki and something something Aoi something something Plutomon. That’s it. I did NOT expect Aoi and Labramon to become one entity (Plutomon) and that Plutomon would speak with Aoi’s voice. That was INCREDIBLY rough (not to mention the fact that she could not ultimately be reasoned with, that she leaves your party early in the route and goes through this incredibly destructive thought process as a way to process her trauma. That the remaining kids would eventually say—multiple times— “That’s not Aoi. Aoi is gone. That’s a monster.”

Aoi’s journey to becoming Plutomon was interesting (and heartbreaking… wow, everything from the Library on was just so rough). What really surprised me was how much Aoi/Plutomon talked about harmony and togetherness (the irony!! The Wrathful and Harmony routes seem so wrapped up in each other). Kaito’s position as the character with the most significant connection to Aoi was also a huge surprise. He was the real MVP of the Wrathful route, and his self-awareness (having full understanding that if Miu had died instead of Saki, he would be going through the exact same thing) was giving me multiple head-exploding moments. I have not played Harmony. I know, roughly, what happens (about the same for that route as I did going into Wrathful), so like… yeah. I kind of know what happens to Kaito, and those parallels are powerful. It stings, even without me experiencing it first-hand. I am curious if there is a similar connection between Kaito and Aoi in Harmonious, and if Aoi ever admits she understands what Kaito is going through. I really can’t bring myself to play that route though. Wrathful was rough, but somehow I picture Harmonious being so much worse. I’m gonna read full spoilers for that one, and then move on to Truthful.

The other thing I found interesting from a story-telling perspective was just the choice of making Aoi the final boss, and what became her very… toxic maternity, I guess I’ll call it? The absolutism by which she wanted to rule, saying it was in everyone’s best interest to be absorbed, being “benevolent” to Takuma and co. by giving them warnings about opposing her (treating them as misbehaving children, essentially), and finally tricking them so they would weaken the Master for her so she could finally absorb him completely… just, whoa. I can’t say I’ve ever seen a piece of media that has gone there, and showed the whole journey of that sort of “my-way-or-the-highway” thinking from a character who is not only very sympathetic and relatable, but suffers so much from low self-esteem and the expectations placed on her—and is, ultimately, a high-school girl. I can kind of understand why this route is some people’s favorite. It’s dark, surprising, and challenging, and it gives me a lot to think about…but it’s just. Too sad. When Aoi stopped appearing on the start screen, it kind of broke me. To say nothing of Labramon. The fact that we only get Plutomon’s assurance (who always speaks in a distorted version of Aoi’s voice) that Labramon agrees with Aoi’s methods, when Aoi never really confided these thoughts to her partner… I wonder.

I am beside myself to unlock Anubismon on the next playthrough. I have to see these two get the happy ending they deserve.

Also, WHAT HAPPENED TO GARURUMON??!?! He just disappears. I can guess, but… AAAAAAUGH!

And in this route, it all comes back to Saki. What Saki thought (or didn’t think) what Saki felt (or didn’t feel), and Aoi spiraling over what she could have done to prevent Saki’s death (while somewhat disregarding Saki’s agency in the matter, interpreting Saki letting go of her hand as a REJECTION of Aoi, and not as an accident or a choice made in order to save Aoi’s life). Absolutely obsessed with the mythological themes surrounding these two: the pull between life and death, the fact that Floramon evolves into Ceresmon (goddess of grain, Earth and life) and Aoi becomes Plutomon (god of the Underworld). The liminal seasons (spring and autumn) represented by the flowers we see in the game (cherry blossoms and red spider lilies), and within the Professor’s own name (Aki=autumn, Haru=spring). Life beginning. Life ending. I was obsessed with these themes just from playing the Moral route and getting vague spoilers that Plutomon was associated with Aoi. This route both solidified my thoughts about them and made me reconsider some assumptions I had made before I played it!

The other interesting thing (I told you there was a lot to think about!) is how thematic the Wrathful route is to the choice you make at the branch. If I’m remembering correctly, the trigger for the Wrathful ending is “I want to stay with Agumon.” Between what happens to Aoi and Labramon (becoming one), what Plutomon’s ultimate goal is (merging all human and kemonogami consciousness into herself, so they can ALL “become one”), and the epilogue (where Takuma and co., alongside their partners, are essentially freedom fighters in a world where both humans and kemonogami coexist, NOT PEACEFULLY, I might add)… yeah. Much like Moral emphasizes getting everyone remaining out alive, Wrathful’s narrative really embraces “together with your partner” in every sense, through all permutations of what is and could have been.

OOF.

#digimon survive #digimon survive spoilers #the cactus speaks #the cactus plays digimon survive

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overthinkingtaleblr · 8 months

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∇ - P.I.E

Ik Toast and Ghost are headcannoned alot to be in their 30s but I am curious about Spooker and Colin (and yes I did all 4 because I couldn't choose)

∇ - old age/aging headcanon

Thank you very much! This is not something i think about often, so this was fun to consider!

I do actually have birth years for 3/4th of these guys! Ghost was born in 1981, Toast was born either early 1980 or late 1979, and Spooker is younger than Toast but older than Ghost, so he’s in the middle. Colon is the youngest of them, though, and his birth year can be as late as 1985, maybe even later. This means in 2013 Ghost was 32, Toast was 34, and Spooker was 33. I don’t remember what year Colon joined the team, but he’d also be creeping into his 30s. Personally, my age headcanons comes solely from a one-off line Ghost had about being in middle school in the 1990s and basing everyone else’s age off of Ghost, but he’s. Not the most trustworthy with his memories. So I’m not gonna demand people see my age headcanon as fact lol. (It also means the whole team is in their 40s now, which is trippy)

Anyways, none of them are anywhere near old age yet, imo, but… I will say that Ghost and Toast, more specifically Toast, probably didn’t sit still long enough to make it past their 60s. In my headcanons, Peewee, Ghost Sr., and Toast Sr. All died at a pretty young age, and Toast’s biggest example in the world is his daredevil grandmother, so neither of them are really raised to consider getting older. Ghost especially is kind of presented like a martyr when things start to go awry, meaning at the first sign of shit hitting the fan, he’s most likely to take a self-sacrificing route like a moron. Spooker ages a bit slower than the others, because he’s pretty dead, so he might be able to outlive Colon too… and Chris would be the best grandpa in the world, he’s going to have so many stories and presents and he’s going to be so happy and i love it for him.

Ask Game Here!

#taleblr #johnny ghost #johnny toast #taleblr headcanons #taleblr pie #fred spooker soup #chris colon ghostie #Chris ghostie #fred soup #spooker soup #colon ghostie #anon ask #ask game

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skeletondoggy · 4 months

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okay writing down my SMTV:V (world's funniest abbreviation btw) thoughts here before I forget. Full spoilers for the original SMT V you've been warned.

OKAY. SO. FIRST OFF WOW I am so so glad they are taking another stab at an alternative scenario instead of just doing either a base Maniax version or the route stuff Redux did. I really appreciate the first game's scenario (as controversial it is) and I wanna talk about what the director said about The Bull and The Snake.

SMT V vanilla is, to me (and friend's I've discussed it with) a game about bonds, the destruction of set standards, and most importantly Being Forced To Go Against Your Own Ideals. The way SMT V twists and distorts alignments and breaks them down is EXTREMELY interesting, but more importantly I think it's important that they don't necessarily Reflect What's Given.

Time and time again the game lets you know this is not the Nahobino's choice. This is a choice of an auxiliary force, and even at the end things don't really land on where they might have. The protagonist is an unwilling figured dragged along in the plans of others to the very, very end. A character that nothing works out for, because they have a fate they must choose.

This is also reflected in Tao's character as well and her lack of agency near the end. While joining Naho is her choice she's...kinda a victim of it all. A saint chosen by Bethel who is used as a martyr figure who then only comes back later, to reveal that she is going to disappear. Everything that makes Tao herself is taken from her, as she becomes a function in the wheel of life and not her own.

The Naho and Tao as figures have the power and fate to change the world, but never for themselves or their own ideals. Never for a better tomorrow, and even when that's chosen they must reckon with a broken throne. Even when Naho desires a normal, peaceful life without divinity in the true route he cannot get it. He is trapped. With Tao as the throne, and him as the lone overseer of all.

This is the bull! It's easy to see, how the horned king sits atop with nothing to share, nothing to love. And this where I'm really interested with Vengeance. Especially considering (guess who) LILITH! Because, in an interesting twist, LUCIFER actually represents the snake who offered knowledge to people in the context of SMT V!

Assuming the other figures within the group will follow suit, I think this is going to be a story about lashing out at the set systems and the snake represents a place of dis-empowerment. A place of rejection, and one where I think many characters are gonna see themselves way, way more active.

In the trailer, Tao says this very interesting line. "You're not along, if you want revenge I'll help you get it." We're then shown a shot of her with Sahori, which means this line is being said there or is probably from another part of the game. But IMMEDIATELY I think it's a very very very big deal to talk about!

Tao as a character is someone who's set into a complacent position through Bethel (and tbh the game too a little), so a self declaration like this could mean a lot of things! On top of this, we see her WELL and alive during the Lahmu section (with Atsuda replacing Lahmus place? Hello?)

Miyazu as well seems to be more directly bitter in the trailer (pleaseee let Khonsu stuff be in the main story lol) which indicates a more direct active role as well! Both her and Tao are very much characters who've been hurt or exposed as weak in the systems that they're trapped in. And fucking hell I'm curious what they're gonna do.

The Bull is a representation of given power, but a lack of control. Thus thematically, I like to think this may mean the snake represents gained power through one's own control. SMT V is a game about the people and their struggles, the way the universe has dealt them unfortunate hands, and how they must brunt this fate even if it is to make them miserable and they never "win". So perhaps this is a story of victory, or clawing for victory as hard as one may.

oh also i think yoko and lilith are def a naho pair lol THANKS FOR READING

#SORRY REALLY LONG WINDED LMAO #PROBABLY COULD'VE COLLECTED MY THOUGHTS BETTER ON VANILLA BUT YOU GET ME #IM EXCITED YAY! YAY! YAYY!

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