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sanchoyo · 2 years

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tmm new liveblog part...2 !!! ep 7-12!!! got home sooner than expected so we are finishing TONIGHT!!!!! >:3c if u missed ep 1-6 liveblog its here!

obviously, spoilers...for this and the og series since I compare and contrast a bit at the end (I give my final thoughts at the end for the new anime overall, too!) ^^

EP 7

-OHHH the aliens new ship design looks Interesting. I see theyre just floating outside of Earth instead of some kinda inter-dimensional pocket area like they were in the original? Neat. the ship still looks super sparse, which, is weird imo. I get that on a meta level filling it w objects would take time and budget from the team doing this tho. but also I want to see their personal rooms or whatever. what do they eat. what do they do all day when they arent being menaces. -ik it happened in the original but its still very funny that deep blue basically grounded kish hahah. get grounded loser (affectionate) -ichigo's strawberry bento bag is so cute -ichigo BOOKING IT AND LEAPING A RAILING TO THANK AOYAMA FOR THE HANDKERCHIEF LMAO -and then her just awkwardly clutching his back for a full 30 seconds. I imagine he was like 'wtf' -masaya 'i cant figure out my feelings At All bc ive never Felt Them Before Now' aoyama and ichigo 'i feel SO Much So Intensely All The Time, loudly' momomiya are sO Fucking Cute I cant HANDLE anytime they speak to each other. glad aoyama initiated the next date!! -MINT LOSING HER MIND OVER ZAKURO IN UNIFORM. YES. THE GAYS. -cafe mew mews redesign is so cute -zakuro sucking ass at being a server but still being beloved by customers. gay icon -aoyama having an Ichigo Sense whenever shes nearby….I wonder if that has to do with the. U Know. her being a mew and him subconsciously reacting to her powers. am I thinking too hard abt this. maybe. -her goodluck charm is soo cute pls. -ichigo n aoyama smacking the shit out of wasps with sticks together. why was that so iconic -WHY DO the chimera anima ALWAYS fucking knock aoyama down. ik its prob bc theyre after ichigo who is Often Near Him but it makes me laugh every single time. get u a bf whos always a damsel (and also sometimes possessed by the big bad! he has the range) -aoyama lying to ichigo and saying he doesnt recognize her to make her feel ok…bc he sees shes distressed and not ready for him to know….king!!! i KNOW he knows. pls. be less cute u two

EP 8: -my god, showing ichigo's crush on aoyama then mints crush on zakuro directly after. really hammering it home. we GET IT they are IN LOVE. -lettuce scaring the shit out of some punks I am Losing My Mind. the fact dudes like that even walked in this ultragirly cafe…pls -supposedly environmentally minded cafe mew mew goes on a cruise, smth that is notoriously Bad for the Environment. lol -aoyama whipping out those environmental facts on the fly..once again I am saying autistic king. -PUDDINGS SIBLINGS!!! CUTIES. and they gave one of them a sort of personality. thats fun -and her lil sailor hat i am crying shes adorbs -not lettuce being infused with a porpoise and getting seasick awww…poor girl -wait are all the girls (sans ichigo) wearing each others colors in dresses…thats so CUTE I love their dresses -lettuce being SO good with puddings lil siblings further enforces my headcanon that shes a teacher as an adult. fuel for me personally -ichigo u got a MAN ON LAND. getting COZY with shirogane on a BOAT. the scandal. (really tho…dancing is fun! esp with nice music! its ok to have Fun queen. I feel like ryou rly didnt even Think abt what he was doing except trying to give his employee a nice lil time since shes not used to this kinda thing) -and also, he doesnt seem to have a sense of personal space with ANYONE, lol -the ocean turning BLOOD RED and the entire shipped being rocked from giant fish monsters. this is my literal nightmare. ur stuck on a boat, nowhere to GO. HELL NO. I will never be caught on a cruise ship. nightmare fuel -the amount of times mint/ichigo fall on each other or crash into each other. dare I say it again. ichimint can still win -PUDDING TART MEETING FINALLY. THEY ARE SUCH CHILDREN. -pudding holding that fish jaw open. her POWER -BRO THAT FISH SNATCHED A CHILD. -lettuce's dive then transformation sequence was def my fav so far. beautiful animation! -did …lettuce just see a glimpse of the alien's civilization going down?? Ohhh the lore..the plot thickens…when she got close to mew aqua too. hmmm!! thats a new mew aqua power! interesting! taking notes! -YESS MERMAID FORM GOOO -YESSS LETTUCE BEING THE FIRST TO FIND MEW AQUA. she looks SO good -PUDDING BROKE THAT FISHES JAW -of course it was regular orange juice…girl did u think he actually spiked it with like. magic. -ryou is such a nice boss sometimes. pls. im not even a huge ryou/lettuce shipper but theyre cute…

EP 9: -aoyama trying to deny ichigo was his gf when the friend gave him tickets but dude. ur friend never said who he thought ur gf was. u just immediately thought of ichigo. shes totally ur gf lol -did not expect to see seiji again. hm. nice surprise hes so involved with mints life ig, just. surprised -mint u absolutely cannot leave for america. what in the world. i feel bad tho bc the mew thing isnt gonna be forever and this would help but also. mint ur RICH rich. u can prob get any job or college u want bestie -ICHIGOS PJS NOOOO THEYRE SO CUTE. her heat shaped chair and strawberry pillow too!! -all the girls gawking at aoyama like hes a zoo animal. i do the SAME THING when my friends tell me they like someone LMAO theyre so real for this scene. nosy queens -then all of them GOSSPING PLSS LMAO -keiichiro side eyeing ryou while all the girls are looking at aoyama. he sus. rightfully so -THE GIRLS ARE SCHEMINGGGG. and it being zakuros plan. obsessed -THIS IS MY MOST FAVORITE THING EVER. THE BEST 4 WING WOMENS IN THE WORLD -MINTS MAN VOICE/CONSTRUCTION COSTUME PLS -nooo old ladies lettuce n pudding…. crying over this entire sequence -ZAKURO AND AOYAMAS ENGLISH. -god they are all such good friends to each other <3 -ive never been so pissed to see kishu. ever. AOYAMA WAS TRYING SO HARD TO WORK UP HIS NERVES AND BEIN SUCH A BRAVE BOY. i hope kishu drowns in the river theyre walking by -god damn aoyama damsel AGAIN its EVERY EPISODE WITH THIS BOY. and I eat it up every single time. pathetic wet boyfriend guy real -kish…u realize if ur trapping them together…theyre gonna bond?? -aoyama clearly not wanting ichigo to have to be a mew bc he doesnt want her to be hurt…oof :( but shes STRONG she can DO IT king just trust her -all the girls attacks look so clean and so nice -either the cafe is SUPER far away from wherever aoyama was going or hes the king of Slow Walking

EP 10: -god damn I love the aliens new ship design SO much. its a creature! -kish is officially ungrounded. good for him I GUESS. -ohh, the tokyo tower stuff! is the season finale going to be a 3 ep long thing?? Very Cool -god damn the tension between aoyama and ryou. lmao -does aoyama just always grab ichigo's wrist when hes nervous? I was joking shes his emotional support cat, but, like, she kinda is -ichigo did u just run off with his jacket LMAO -lord she didnt even kiss him and she turned into a cat -def prefer the old anime's version of cat ichigo. smth abt this new version looks…off?? uncanny?? -oh my god francis IS Back. im Shook. out of all the characters that u didnt need to bring back. u bring the fucked up pervert cat. im losing my mind -ichigo's regrets as shes sinking are so funny im sorry queen -wait her being at risk to stay a cat and becoming more catlike in that form wasnt a super big issue in the og, was it? it seems more dire and time sensitive in this version, in the original it felt a lot more jokey -ppl asking mew mews for help over the government is SOO real. me asf -zakuro on a motorcycle. amen to that brother -from aoyamas POV..ichigo ran off with his jacket, then…he finds it in he river….he must be thinking she just fucking chucked it away LMAO -like he for sure knows shes mew ichigo, though, and noticed the bell?? i mean being a superhero then turning into a cat is a big mental leap ig he'd have no reason to assume its her…the whole sequence is so funny -return of aoyamas dog! my god it acts like like my dog with my cat. being jealous. so real -aoyama sleeping ON THE COVERS and not under them. yeeeep, if anyone watching this didnt see the original this should be the point u realize hes a fucking alien for that one. what in the hell was that toe shot. -his littol jammies tho PLS. if ichigos cat form wasnt so…weirdly uncanny this would be a lot cuter. but also, ichigo, dont kiss him without consent? hello? u know how that feels. even if he does like u back! -the rest of the mews searching desperately, well aware that thousands could die. ichigo, having a crisis bc her crush is cuddling her lap in his sleep. the stakes have never been so high

EP 11: -the aliens posing for the helicopter camera HAHA -no way…mint and zakuro on a motorcycle together….the rituals...they are intricate….. -oh more alien lore -WHAT. did they change it from them being from earth originally??? they…said their HOME planet is no more than dust storms and heat (lava??) now….thats NOT EARTH??? ohhh. interesting. dont think I like that choice…bc them being originally from earth and humans being descended from db explained why the aliens look so humanoid!!!

-perhaps the concept of them being from another planet is a lie the trio was told? (I am def thinking too hard abt it. but also why would mew aqua let her see that? ? activity from a non-earth planet?? why does it suddenly have that power??? its MAGIC WATER.) -oh my god the underground/cave cities!!! fucking line up with my fanfic/headcanons!!! I am Living -PLSSS BABY ALIENS THEY ARE SO CUTE LITTOL PATAOTOES -I do wonder why their planet chose to send (3) children. like its assumed pie as the oldest is prob not older than 17-18? right? and kish is assumedly 15-16, tart is DEF puddings age….they took an entire ship! (that from the one room weve been seeing looks EMPTY, altho maybe thats their. um. special deep blue contacting room?? ?) I wonder how many ships they had to work with, is that the only one? were they entrusting 2 teens and a child with their only ship?? surely not right?? are a lot of the older ppl sick and cant make the trip/fight, or are they busy and too vital to go, so they send the younger ppl so like, child soldiers=less risk if they happen to fail and die?? its like…a Lot of responsibility, so im Wondering. i doubt we will ever get these Answers…but I want them. (and ik the meta answer is they need to be close to the mews age for pairing purposes lol) -so if im understanding correctly, the aliens plan is to kill all humans (who they consider to be ruining the planet, ofc) then…wait on DB? so they assume DB can fix whatever they fuck up with the planet? or the aliens just simply arent affected by the pollution, which they dont seem to be, but they need the planet clean..ish... to grow food, and have livestock, right? interesting. kind of do wonder in an au where the aliens Won, WOULD he have done that, like actually been able and willing to unfuck the pollution stuff? we never really got much insight to him except that he hates humans, so maybe he wouldve? -ohh the aliens going after civilians is SMART. divide n conquer yk. maybe theyve been reading the art of war -boy if u dont shut up with those percentages -kishu stop fueling mints crisis!! fuck off!! im also indecisive as a person so it felt PERSONAL -oh zakuro got CLOSE close to tell mint not to worry rn <3 -ryoukitty…..ryoukittykissy. pls. he just LAYS INTO HER after too. I love how they squabble. they are so funny. masago is my fav but ryouigo is also p good, honestly. I like it for the same reasons I like ichimint...(but ichimint is above ryouchigo bc better colors together, and gay. sorry ryou) -god ichigo dodging that lil birds nest while running was such a sweet little detail!!! and her saying she appreciates life more since becoming a mew and that she wouldnt have met her friends…I nEED A MOMENT IM EMO ABOUT THIS -and her running thru that office. so fun n cute -that one intense rock sounding song they have in the ost that plays as ichigo arrives?? Im obsessed -oh god i feel so bad even knowing whats going to happen. aoyama is gonna just be WAITING. pls no. the secondhand feelings I get from that are so bad. ive been there buddy, being stood up sucks </3

EP 12: -oh my god, in the og anime kish broke her phone, which is BAD, but this time, a chimera ATE IT??? THATS SO MUCH WORSE IMO. at least with the broken phone most companies have insurance, u could prob easily get a new one!! how do u explain a MONSTER ATE UR PHONE. -god damn kish still is a lil crazy huh. i love that and respect it. itd be boring if he was nice but up until now he rly hasnt been a Huge Menace. but some of the faces hes made so far this ep. Yeah! truly a ManYandere -YESSS THEY KEPT THE BIG OLE MOTHS DESIGN BASICALLY THE SAME. one of the most iconic chimeras for sure -im glad ichigos lesbian bffs told aoyama how bad things were, bc he is hyperfocused on Waiting And Thinking abt Ichigo he didnt check any social media or news outlets at all until now ig. most ppl do that while waiting around these days I think. -sorry ik its serious and im tense even knowing itll be fine but ryous voice coming out of masha made me laugh -'your modified bodies can withstand the pollution!' (that would kill everyone else) ok but would this premise not make for a fun fucked up apocalypse AU?? only the magical girls survive AU…. -ichIGO ATTACKING THE ALIENS DIRECTLY!!!! QUEEN YESS GOOO. GET THEIR ASSES -'GET CRAZY' -ICHIGO 2022 -HYPEST SEASON FINALE -mint making her choice to stay in japan bc of ichigo….ichimint win!!! -sorry, where did tart get BOMBS?? I miss the aliens old weapons, ngl -god the ost is SO good I keep saying it but the moment mint is rising up the tower and everyones covering her?? what kind of epic symphony… -LESBIAN ATTACK!!!!!!! SHE LAUNCHED HER INTO THE SKY!!!! i AM OBSESSED -mint being the first to use the mew aqua rod!!! im so happy for her!! and its BLUE!!!! oh it looks precious. theyre all gonna get to use it arent they!! at some point!! thats so great!!! -tho ichigos fun lil spin in the og series was my fav of course, this is still very pretty -the mew aqua rod being a …masha form… is not my fav new thing tho….I LIKED the implications of it being smth ancient from the og anime! oh well -w- I can still pull more from the og anime than this one for my fanfics hahah -aww, I like the strawberry rods new design! I still like the og more I think, but this one isnt bad or anything!! and the attack was amazing tbh -ryou almost had a heart attack. my headcanon of him greying before 20 is real. -ichilettuce pose near the end. cute -….I was fully expecting the blue knight to show up during that fight. season 2, I guess?? -zakumint momence near the end….sweet -OH M Y GOD THEYRE PLAYING THE SONG FOR THE FINALE. THE S O N G. A slowed version, too!! NOPE. i am weeping. I just got hit by 40000 tones of nostalgia -they didnt have to do this to me. AGH -PLEASEE MY GOD I CANT HANDLE THIS. THEYRE SO SWEET. SO TENDER. he 100% saw her ears and was being polite by covering them. -NOOO HES CRYING TOO. THEYRE SO CUTE. HE DOESNT EVEN PRESS FOR AN EXPLANATION EITHER. -and a deep blue tease! ok! kind of expected as much. OOF THOUGH that my sweetheart got me so good im still reeling. the girls mustve lost their minds when they heard that. im girls.

-overall thoughts:

-VERY good!!! there were times the animation got wonky, but that happened many times in the og anime too, so. eh. this one at least kept mostly stylistically similar, whereas in the og the faces style could change WILDLY ep from ep. this one was more like, quality changes from scene to scene but still roughly the same style. which is fine, I know how budget and time restraints are. its Understandable.

-there were other things I def liked better in the og, too, like the outfits n transformations, but the colors here were amazing, the costume colors esp worked super nice when all the girls were in the same shot, they looked awesome together!

-I love that each girl will assumedly get a turn w the mew aqua rod! and it changes color to suit each one!

-I loved the OST. So Much. def gonna have to listen to each song again

-and all of the masago moments were REALLY cute. idk, ppl who know me know I love them both a lot in the og anime and the ship. but this one, it rly felt like they let aoyama be more..shy?? I guess?? it was CUTE. also he was a damsel far more, which was also cute. really, I love Strong Catgirl GF and Awkward Normie Shy BF. (normie for NOW. season 2 when)

-the pacing was nice (I do like the og animes fillers, but I can do w/out them! it still felt fleshed out enough! things happened at a really nice pace when u watch back to back, not sure how it wouldve felt waiting a week between and digesting them more?)

-I didn't super love the changing of the aliens backstory from earth to some rando planet, or masha being the mew aqua rod?? or something?? but those are SUCH minor nitpicks honestly.

-I loved how scheme-y the girls got together. their friendship is so sweet and the best thing from the show for me. mint being the og and ichigo not being like, The Leader (yet?) but all of them feeling pretty equal standing is Nice. they rly seem like real friends and I love just. how supportive they all are of each other!! I rly do feel like they work so well together by the end of the season as a team.

-im glad they kept the animation pretty silly and let the girls make goofy funny faces!!! like, they were still cute/pretty in a lot of shots, but they kept the Silliness and Antics at a Max Level. they felt their age if that makes sense. I appreciate that

-like I KNEW what would happen, but the OST and lighting/color schemes on a lot of the scenes made me like. Genuinely Feel Panicked or Excited!!! (of course I was excited to watch)

-my god 'my sweetheart' got my blood PUMPING HEART RACING AT THE END I COULDNT BELIEVE IT. AAAAH!!!

-when is season 2 I need it NOW!!! Im still glad I waited to watch, bc now I have fanart to go thru :3 and I didnt have to wait to watch the next ep, waiting for s2 is gonna HURT. I want it SOON.

#tmm #tmmn #tmmn spoilers #tokyo mew mew #sanchoyorambles #tmmn liveblog #tmm liveblog

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ackermanshoe · 3 years

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March comes in like a lion, it's Portrayal of toxic & healthy relationship and how to compares rivamika + Ereh

Que the longest title everr 😌✨

So before I start on the actual analysis, I recently started watching March comes in like a lion instead of doing my assignments and I half way through season 2. For those of you who haven't watched it, it might be a spoilers so beware of that.

In this analysis I'll be comparing the similarities I found between Rei, Hina and Kyoko.

So watching any anime after being do emotionally attached to rivamika it's only natural that I compare them to the characters with even the tiniest bit similarities in their dynamic but Rei and hina's relationship jump in episode 4 of season 2 really caught me off guard and I was like omg?? Rivamika?? How do I make this about them 😩

Anyway so a little background on Rei's relationship with both girls Kyoko and Hina ( Hinata ). Firstly, i subconsciously placed Rei has Mikasa, kyoko has Eren and Hina as Levi, why? You will know on a minute. Rei is a depressed kid who has known only one way of life and that's through shogi games and after his parents death ( cough cough ) he was taken in by a old friend ( I think ) of his dad's who was also obsessed with shogi. Kyoko is the biological daughter of this man who has "adopted" Rei and later on Rei was came to know Hina and her sisters, they were super supportive of him from the start and having lost family members themselves they related to him on a personal level.

So you see why Eren and mikasa's dynamic matches with Rei and Kyoko and not only as "step siblings" it's also the fact that Rei became somewhat obsessed with her through the time he had spent over at their house, it's toxic and it's been showcased that way ever since kyoko was introduced into the series. Rei thought of her when he heard the word "love" and he even admitted to the fact that having her around is toxic and yet he can't push her away. He said he does not want to stop hearing her voice even tho she , herself is in love with a much older man who is married. Everytime she showed up to his bedroom uninvited and slept next to him my mind went "he is in love with her and their relationship is so toxic why does the author keep bringing her into his life?" Or "girl get the fuck away from him".

Without even thinking too much deep into their physical connection I already knew I would be able to related this dynamic to Eren and Mikasa. Although this series gives us much more depth into the main characters views since it's narrated from his own perspective, and the fact that he metaphorically compared his feelings of being lost and sadness helps me as an audience to understand what's happening much much easier than attack on titan. I personally feel like this kind of series are usually short ( idk how long this is) because it feels like the author knows exactly what he is going for, everything is set in stone.

Going back to Rei's ( mikasa's) relationship with kyoko ( Eren ) it's much much clear how toxic it had become for him in more than just one way. And the show isn't denying Rei of his feelings towards Kyoko and it's not even attempting to distant him from her and yet you just knew there had to be someone better right? That's when they introduced Hina and Kyoko in the same episode, meeting each other and a sense of invisible rivalry gushed over them, especially Hina. She is a happy go lucky girl and extremely sensitive to things to the point it kinda annoys me everytime she bursts out crying ( but hey you can't hate a genuinely good character ).

That's where things get interesting for me maybe because I am on that Levi X Mikasa agenda all the time but just like rivamika their relationship has been portrayed as platonic for the longest time in the seaosns. If I didn't go out of way to search up who Rei falls in love with and it didn't say hina's name I probably wouldn't be making this comparison right now because who wants to have their heart broken for the 2nd time in the same fucking month 🙄.

Anyway so in this one episode Hina comes home crying because of bullying issue at school and as she runs off into the dark streets Rei chases her and eventually catching up to her takes her hand and being able to relate to her problems, comparing his younger self to her present Rei reaches out his hand and God fucking damn it he says "you saved my life..I promise I'll stay with you" ofc I'm making this post now you know the real reason 🤡.

The unseen build up that happen between them reminds me of rivamika, the Portrayal of healthy relationship is rivamika. Hina (in our case Levi ) to Rei is the voice of emotion, she speaks out the feelings that Rei has been surpassing all these years inside of him. Just like how we talked about Levi is the voice of reason, while Mikasa has the impulsive urge to act up. Just like how Levi became the perosn who reasonably always took mikasa's side, he gave her personal reasons to take Erens side everytime have an actual meaning towards the scouts / everyone , he then became someone Mikasa was able to object & voice out her opinion towards because she knew that he would response and guide her the right way and finally he became someone she was able to fully trust.

Much like Hina and Rei, when Hina cried out her heart and Rei couldn't help but go back to his past self and imagine Hina coming to him and giving him a hand, being his saviour. It's much like how Levi saw his past self in Mikasa present ( S1 ), Levi gave Mikasa the hand she needed when she didn't know she needed.

Hina despite being much younger than him, was able to make him realise that he too was shutting out his emotions and was able to let himself be free through Hina when she cried, expressing her frustrations and very human like emotions. In the forest of the giant trees when Mikasa and Levi saved Eren for the first time he told her " we got your precious friend, didn't we?" A slight wake up call he had given her for the very first time, an attack on Mikasa's ego and evoking a different emotions within her. Like telling her it's not only about Eren and getting revenge, risking your life so easily, Levi had lost his entire squad in order to protect Eren so now that he is safe they better leave now.

So the question is did Levi and Mikasa save each other?

What can I say that I haven't said already in here about these two?

"you saved my life" Rei says to Hina as he reached out her hand and the beauty of that scene was the fact that it was delicate and soft despite it not being anything romantic. Remind me of that panel of Mikasa touching Levi's shoulder. How ironic is the fact that I'm comparing Hina, a openly emotional character to Levi who is said to be the most emotional inside?

Levi physically saved Mikasa a lot of the time however emotionally Levi saved Mikasa from being selfish and from herself. What if I said and ignoring 139, that Levi was one of of the biggest reasons Mikasa took the initiative and decapitated Eren that day?

Wait why does it feel like I already said it before lol

Through Levi, Mikasa learnt to trust more, learnt that even though they gave difference not only in height, age and in how they treat Eren ( Levi with force and Mikasa with care ), Mikasa still came in terms with Levi and relied on him, shared her burden with him. I think that's the biggest character twist Mikasa had, the fact that she was ready to draw sword at anyone who treated Eren wrong and everyone was scared of her and then came the grumpy shorty who beat her beloved brother right in front of her but eventually he became the biggest form of support she had in the end. I just can not help but laugh at all the unseen development this ship has had and all the implication of Futher interaction after season 3 between them, it's really obvious they had something going on because imagine you don't talk to someone for like 3 years and suddenly when you engage in battle against , paired up with them suddenly you become the strongest duo known to humanity. +?)!#)# make it make sense.

Sooo now you see the that having toxic relationship with a partner is only natural and inevitable but growing from that, opening your eyes to those who actually care there for you is rather healthy. So moral of the story is guys make sure stick with those who tells you to stay with them, the end.

Omg guys this turned out so much longer than I intended, anyway hopefully y'all liked it. I know it's not the strongest comparison or analysis but I feel like I'm running out of words for what I want to say about rivamika it feels like I'm recycling my sentences from previous analysis over and over again because ✨ lack of content ✨ and my inability to think of something new.

Please ignore all my spelling mistakes I have decided to embrace my mistakes instead of fixing them simply because I'm too lazy 😉

💜💜💜

#rivamika #rivamikacanon #levimika #rivamika analysis #BurnTheScarfMikasa

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joneswuzhere · 3 years

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hello join me in thinking about some books and authors that are, or might be, part of s5′s intertextuality

5.10 in particular offered specific shout outs, and also u know i’m always wondering what might be ahead so i have some ideas on that:

- first, as mentioned in a previous ask post, i know i wasn’t alone in keeping an eye out for 5.10 parallels to the lost weekend (1945) the film that gave episode 1.10 its name and several themes - or to the 1944 book by charles r jackson which the film is based on

- s5 has not been shy about revisiting earlier seasons, especially s1. altho i feel that 1.10′s parallels to the lost weekend centered characters other than jughead (mostly betty), a 1.10-5.10 connection involving jughead and themes from jackson’s story (addiction, writers block, self reflection) seemed v possible if not inevitable

- but like,, , for a hot minute after the ep, i was really stumped on understanding how anything from the book or film could apply, even tho the pieces were almost all there

- jackson’s protagonist don birnam goes thru and comes out the other side of a harrowing days-long drinking binge that could be compared to jughead’s one-night hallucinogenic writing retreat

- but jughead is struggling primarily with traumatic memories, not addiction and self control like birnam. and tho drinking activates birnam’s creativity, it paralyzes his writing as he gets lost in fantasies; he’s never published anything. jughead’s drug trip recreates circumstances that already helped him write one successful book. even the rat that startles him mid-high doesn’t line up with birnam’s withdrawal vision of a dying mouse, symbolic of his horror at his own self-destruction thru alcohol

- and maybe the most visible discordance: in the film there’s a romantic motif around a typewriter. first it’s an object of shame; birnam’s failure to write, tied up with his drinking, makes him flee his relationship. he tries to pawn the typewriter for booze money and finally a gun when shooting himself feels easier than getting sober. but with the help of relentless encouragement from girlfriend helen, he quits drinking, commits to her, and focuses on typing out the story he’s dreamt of writing. rd goes so far to avoid setting any comparable scenario that jughead has brought a wholeass printer into the bunker so there can still be a physical manuscript to cover in blood by the end, even without his own typewriter. the subtle detail of his laptop bg image is a little less noticeable than his avoidance of betty’s gift

- tabitha might be closer to a parallel than jughead is, but she’s still no helen. both refuse to take advantage of the inebriated men in their care, but birnam takes advantage of helen, financially and emotionally. jughead refused a loan from the tate family and now has resolved to deal with his shit before he considers a relationship with tabitha. instead of helen’s relentless and unwelcomed attempts to get birnam sober, tabitha reluctantly agrees to help jughead trip safely bondage escape notwithstanding. she even helps him get the drugs.

- whatever potentials exist for parallels to jackson’s story, they were not explored for this episode. ok so why tf am i even talking about this? what was there instead?

- i have arrived at the point

- s5 has been revisiting s1, not directly but with a twist. and jughead’s agent samm pansky is back. u may recall, pansky is named for sam lansky

- jughead’s trip-thru-trauma is a story device tapped straight from lansky’s book ‘broken people’

- lansky is like if a millenial john rechy wrote extremely LA-flavored meta but just about himself no jk very like a modern successor to charles r jackson. both play with the boundary between memoir and fiction. lansky is gay; jackson wrote his lost weekend counterpart as closeted and remained closeted himself until only a few years before his death. both write with emotional clarity and self-scrutiny on the experiences of addiction, sobriety, and the surrounding issues of shame and self worth

- i feel like a fool bc after this ep i had been thinking about de quincey and his early writings on addiction (c.1800s), but i failed to carry the thought in the other direction, to contemporary writers in the genre, to make this connection sooner

- lansky’s second book, broken people, follows narrator ‘sam’, mid-20s, super depressed, hastled by his agent to write a decent follow-up to his first book, but too busy struggling with his self-worth and baggage from several past relationships. desperate, he takes up an offer to visit a new age shaman who promises to fix everything wrong with him in a matter of days. not to over simplify it but he literally spends a weekend doing psychedelics and hallucinating about his exes. jughead took note

- unless u want me to hurl myself into yet another dissertation about queer jughead, i think his parallel to sam - who, unlike jughead, has considerable financial privilege and whose anxieties center on body dysmorphia, hiv scares, and his own self-centeredness - pretty much ends there

- But,, the gist of the book could not be more harmonius with a major theme shared by the 2 films that inform the actual hallucination part of jughead’s bunker scene: mentally reframing past relationships to get closure + confronting trauma head-on in order to move forward

- so that’s neat. what other book and author stuff was in 5.10?

- stephen king and raymond carver get name dropped. i’m passingly familiar with them both but u bet i just skimmed their wiki bios in case anything relevant jumped out

- like jughead, carver was a student (later a lecturer) at the iowa writers workshop. also the son of an alcoholic and one himself

- i recall carver’s ‘what we talk about when we talk about love’ is what jughead was reading in 2.14 ‘the hills have eyes’ after he finds out about the first time betty kissed archie (at that time he does not respond as would any of carver’s characters)

- this collection of carver stories deals especially with infidelity, failings of communication, and the complexities and destructiveness of love. to unashamedly quote the resource that is course hero, ‘carver renders love as an experience that is inherently violent bc it produces psychic and emotional wounds.’ very fun to wonder about the significance of this collection within the s2 episode and in jughead’s thoughts. and maybe now in the context of the s5 state of relationships. or, at least, the state of jughead’s writing as seen by his agent

- anyway pansky doesn’t want carver, he wants stephen king

- i have too much to say about gerald’s game in 5.10, that’s getting its own post someday soon

- lol wait king’s wife is named tabitha uhhh king’s wiki reminded me of his childhood experience that possibly inspired his short story ‘the body’ (+1986 movie ‘stand by me’) when he ‘apparently witnessed one of his friends being struck and killed by a train tho he has no memory of the event’

- no mention of that in this rd episode but memories of a train could be interesting to consider with the imagery that intrudes on jughead’s hallucination. i still feel like it was a truck but the lights and sounds he experiences may be a train

- ok now we’re in the speculation part of today’s segment

- if jughead’s traumatic memory involves trains, then it’s possible this plot will take influence from la bête humaine <- this 1938 movie is based on the 1890 novel by french writer émile zola. this story deals with alcoholism and possessive jealousy in relationships, sometimes leading to murder. huh, kind of like carver. zola def comes down on the nature side of the nature-vs-nuture bad seed question (tho i should say he approaches this with great or maybe just v french compassion). also i can’t tell if this is me reaching but, something about la bête humaine reminds me of king’s ‘secret window’ which we’ve observed to be at least a style influence on jughead post time jump

- but wow a late-19th century french writer would be a random thing to drop into this season, right? then again zola also wrote about miners, which we’ve learned are an important part of this town’s history + whatever hiram is up to this time. and most notably, zola wrote ‘j’accuse...!’ an open letter in defense of a soldier falsely accused and unlawfully jailed for treason: alfred dreyfus. archie’s recent army trouble comes to mind.

- since the introduction of old man dreyfuss (plausibly Just a nod to close encounters actor richard dreyfuss, but also when is anything in this show Just one thing) i’ve been wondering if these little things could add up to a season-long reference to zola’s writings. but i had doubts and didn’t want to speak on it too soon bc, u know, it’s weird but is it weird enough for riverdale??

- however,,,

- (come on, u knew where i was going with this)

- a24′s film zola just came out. absolutely no relation to the french writer, it’s not based on a book but an insane and explicit twitter thread by aziah ‘zola’ wells about stripping and? human trafficking?? this feels ripe for rd even outside the potentials here for the lonely highway/missing girls plot.

- that would add up to a combination of homage that feels natural to this show

- anyway pls understand i’m just having fun speculating, most of this is based on nothing more concrete than the torturous mental tendril ras has hooked into my skull pls let go ras pls let go

#accompanying image has no meaningful organization it's just there to make me look insane. enjoy #riverdale speculation #filmref #but books #adhd has me like. this is Not the post i've been trying to write for weeks but my brain gave me no choice

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pamgkrthwrites · 4 years

Text

Flame of Healing | EraserMic x Reader | Chapter 5 - Back Off

Masterlist | AO3

Warnings: Angst, crying, reveal, shouting, soulmate au

Word Count: 2064

Taglist: @stargazingaloneatnight

A/N: Sorry this chapter took so long. The image below is of one of the character mentioned in today’s chapter. Be warned, Shouta yells at reader in this chapter.

Cover by @pamgkrthart

The week had passed slowly. Tuesday, Shouta came in to get paperwork from you so his agency could report it correctly, Wednesday came and many people were celebrating Hizashi’s birthday and on Thursday, Ms Joke saw you in the morning and was teasing you about your chose to avoid your Soulmates.

But today,

Today was Friday.

Which meant the Anti-Soulmate group meetings.

The group was named Heart’s Desire for Wronged Souls. Its leader was a man who divorced his soulmate who he was three kids with for an older woman who rejected her soulmate. The group is a mix of many things, counselling for soulless, counselling for rejecting soulmates, parties, get to gathers, and the main event, dating centre for “wanting souls”.

They started to label people who rejected their soulmates as “rejects”, and started to be rejected by people around them.

You were more than glad Ms Joke didn’t go around confessing what she found out about you, and that all she did was simple teasing.

But you were happy the day was done and sighed in relief as you closed your apartment door, dropping your bags to the floor. You crash onto your couch and let out all the stress in your back with your quirk.

“Time for some stress release.” You sighed as you got yourself ready for that afternoon of fun activities.

---

Shouta and Hizashi eyed the building from one across the road, watching and counting everyone who entered. Shouta tried to make himself fancy looking and Hizahi tried his best to not look like himself.

“I like it when your hair is tied back, Shou.” Hizashi flirt as he watched his partner.

“Get back to work, ‘Zashi.” Shouta shushed him as he continued to watch the people down below.

Hizashi puffed as he leaned onto the wall and watched. “Why did we get assigned to do this mission? Don’t they know I am the last hero who would want to do it.”

“Which is probably why they chose you. You had your 21st the other day so the doubt that I’m not your soulmate might be there. It could also be you don’t like me and have doubts about the relationship but as a Pro Hero you have to keep up the idea you are happy with me-”

“Shou stop please you’re concerning me.”

“What if that’s why we haven’t met her yet, Hizashi?” Shouta turned to Hozashi. “She must have seen you at the very least name us as soulmates and figured it out, yet she hasn’t come looking? What could possibly be the reason-”

“Shouta shut up.”

“Hizashi I-”

“No look!” Hizashi grabbed Shouta’s face and made him turn to look at a girl walking towards the building.

“What on earth is she doing here?” Shouta asked he stared down at the girl walking into the building.

“Why is M/N L/N here?”

---

“Chase Saito!” You greeted the young man.

Chase Saito was the son of the founding member. Even tho he was 24 he already had built a massage medical Company that sold to Japan, China, Korea and Australia.

Chase and you had on and off flirty relationship. He seemed to always start them and you would end them if he got too creepy. He was respectful when he crossed the line and would back off until you were okay with him again.

You two may not have clicked all the time but the small relationship you two had would work out with effect.

“L/N!” He smiled as he walked over to you in a fancy suit. “I saw you on the news healing that hero! I didn’t know your quirk could do that.”

His voice was like honey to the ears, sweet and smooth that attracted bees and butterflies, yet also wasps and flies.

The reason for that effect on people was his Quirk, Ease. He can ease people around him, making them calm. He was easy to be around, and only after you walked away did you realise how sticky and annoying he can be, just like honey.

Annoying people aren’t bad to be around, they just had moments, moment about them they didn’t know about or couldn’t change about themselves. Sometimes they were too much and you can stay away and they are usually respectful about it, sadly because it has happened to them so much.

Chase may have been annoying sometimes, but he was a good person, and he goes towards those people as well. He always called people by their last name in public, that’s what he had to do as a public figure. He didn’t mind people calling him by his first name. He spent half his life in England so he used to it.

“If I had known you had a healing quirk I would have used my quirk to convince you to join me!” He smiled brightly as he made his way over to you and a respectful distance away.

“Ha, yeah. I don’t like advertising my quirk.” You blushed in embarrassment. “People used me during my childhood for having a regeneration quirk.”

He looked shocked at your response. You didn’t really talk about your childhood to him or anyone there.

“Oh, I’m so sorry about that.” He said with full honesty. “Your quirk is designed to be used by others but that doesn’t mean people have the right to use you as an object.”

You felt small at that moment.

You don’t know what you feel.

Happiness or grief.

Oboro said something similar when he first started to get to know you too.

This wasn’t Oboro in front of you though, this was someone else.

Someone who even fully understood staying away from one’s soulmate.

His short honey-orange hair shaping his face defining his features. You look Chase deeply into his dark green eyes. They reminded you of Hizashi-

Your blood turns cold once that names crosses you.

Even In a place like this, you can’t avoid the bitter truth.

Chase noticed the changes in your face and wore a worried face.

“Hey, are you-?”

Hands grip you by both shoulders and pull you away from Chase.

“Are you harassing her, reject?!”

Everyone goes dead silent and you feel anger rise within you.

“What the fuck you say?” You snap your head to the tall man.

To say you were shocked to see Shouta glaring down at Chase would be an understatement.

Where his hands where on you burnt your skin. You wanted to fall into his body and wrap your arms around him. Looking up at him trying to protect you gave you butterflies and pushed a blush onto your checks.

So forcefully pushing him off of you with harshness not just hurt him, but hurt you, and the way he looked down at you with shock also hurt.

“Chase isn’t harassing me, Asshole!” You yelled at him. “You’re just being a dickhead who wants to shame us for not choosing our soulmates!”

The shock and hurt on his face hurt you. It hurt knowing you were hurting him.

Why was he wearing a fancy suit.

You felt your eyes burn as you held your ground, seeing him hurt.

You wanted to cry.

You needed to leave.

You rushed passed Shouta and headed towards the exit fast.

“M/N! Please wait!” Shouta spoke and went to move to go after you.

“M/N?” Chase said softly. “But her name is Y/N…”

Chase may have spoken softly, but Shouta still heard him and froze.

Shouta snapped his head around. “What did you just say?!”

Chase was too scared to respond to from the harsh tone, but Shouta didn’t really need him to respond. His reaction was enough.

Shouta moved back around to chase after you.

M/N L/N was Y/N L/N this entire time, she was just hiding from them.

---

This was supposed to be your off day, your relaxed day.

Not your hot soulmate insulting your friends-

What did you just say?

You puffed as you walked down the street to the train station, only to hear running footsteps coming for you.

You quickly grabbed pepper spray from within one of your pockets only to hear Shouta.

“You lied to our faces!”

You stopped and turned around.

“What are you talking about?” You asked as you made it clear you were putting away your weapon.

“You knew who we were, didn’t you?!” He huffed and puffed. “Oboro told you and pushed you yet you still gave us a fake name! You even hid our names on your wrists, don’t you!”

You were shocked that he figured it out. Chase must have corrected him on your name and it clicked in for Shouta.

You stared at the angry hurt Shouta, tears threatening to leave his eyes.

You did this to him.

“I’m right, aren’t I?!” He yelled at you as he walked close to where you stood. “What is so wrong with us you had to hide from us? Why don’t you love us?!”

“Love you?!” You glared at him as tears threaten to leave your own eyes. “I do love you! I love both you! I watch everything you two do! Sometimes I regret hiding I’m not going to lie, but you two were happy and have been happy without me this entire-”

“YOU DON’T KNOW SHIT!” He yelled in your face as tears ran down your face. “We ask ourselves all the time why we haven’t found you! We are a public figure and Hizashi is very public about having two soulmates so we knew you were hiding, but we didn’t know it was for this long! All we ever do is wonder what type of person you are! What your life was like! But no, you found out through Oboro and fucking hide from us since!”

You two both glared at each other. Your names were burning at the skin. Your high emotions were hurting both of you and your soulmate marks.

You were both crying at this point as you glared at each other. Were faces were so close yet all you could both feel were each other’s names on your wrists.

Shouta held your face in his large hands and rested his forehead onto yours. You both sobbed.

“Please… Just give us a chance…” He asked in a soft voice filled with sobs.

You cried into his hands as you pulled up your arms to wrap around him. He pushed your head into the crook of his neck and rubbed your back as you sobbed onto his shoulders.

You never felt so warm in your life.

“The last time I saw you cry your hair turned into fire.” Shouta admitted.

You remember that day, the day he told you Oboro died. You sniffed and rubbed your eyes onto his fancy jacked.

“I’m sorry.”

“Your just as emotional as Hizashi.”

You two stood there for a couple of minutes before you heard footsteps approaching.

You felt Shouta tense up and you gripped his tighter as you hid your face.

“Shou, where are you-?” You heard Hizashi’s voice and you tensed up.

You could feel Shouta’s arm move as he silently talks to your third half. Even if you are trying to not pay attention you hear a small gasp from Hizashi at one point and Shouta’s arm made a motion with his arm that got Hizashi to stop.

Silence falls and Shouta breaks apart from you.

“We are going to drop you home, but we will be having a discussion in the morning.” He says with a stern voice.

You hesitantly nod your head. Shouta puts his hand on your back and leads you to their car.

Hizashi and Shouta continue to have a silent conversation with you right there only for it to end once you enter into their black car.

“Address.” Shouta says with a stern voice, you answering softly.

The car ride to your apartment was awkward, but you couldn’t stop the butterflies in your stomach from the hug earlier.

Shouta leaves Hizashi in the car as he walks you up to your door and leans on the door frame once you enter.

“I will tell Hizashi what happened and in the morning we will be discussing how we will proceed.” He says as he looks down at you. “Don’t run off, Y/N.”

#shouta aizawa #eraserhead #hizashi yamada #present mic #shouta aizawa x reader #aizawa x reader #eraserhead x reader #hizashi yamada x reader #present mic x reader #erasermic x reader #reader is female #fem!reader #polyamorous #poly relasionship #soulmate au

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dylanxmin · 4 years

Text

painkiller ∣ 2 ∣ j.hs

breakups are habitual, ordinary maybe even easy for some other people, and maybe it could be easy for you, too, if you haven’t been dumped by your boyfriend after finding out that you were pregnant. no, it wasn’t easy even a bit. and a stranger who wants to be your side doesn’t make this all easy for you, at all.

pairing; jung hoseok x reader

genre; angst, fluff, humor, pregnancy au, strangers to lovers au, single!mom au, slice of life au,,

warnings; angst, and more angst(we will have less angst in time i promise), swearings, mention of sexual harrasment(it’s a light scene)

word count; 7.4k

rating; nc17

a/n; heyo!! i know i’m pretty late, but it took me ages to write, and it was hard for me to gather my thoughts to turn them into writing,, but yes, here i am with the episode 2!! i hope you can enjoy this episode as much as the first one. i’m really happy with the feedbacks i got with the first episode, and i love to write this fic, so thank you for encouraging me more to write about this hoseok and y/n. i still need your feedbacks tho lol,, love you all ♡

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‘Can you please take this to Jin?’ Jimin asked the man who passes by him, causing him to stop, eyes narrowed after he looks at Jimin. ''You know I would, but I have to finish this resource, and he doesn't want to see me before I finish this,'' Jimin begs once again, eyes taking the shape of a puppy. What Jimin said is not a lie, and he is drowning in research for a patient, where Jin asked him a lot while ago, and he is a bit scared to see him before he finishes this.

''Okay, okay. Give me that,'' Jimin coos, wiggling his body before handing the file to the man who saves him, with a big grin on his face. ''I owe you big time!'' he yells, while the other man takes a turn at the big white corridor. His big grin fades after he turns his papers, he has a lot of things to do yet, he finds himself procrastinating, as he always does.

Hoseok folds the file in his hand, sighing to himself, and asks why he always finds himself while agreeing what Jimin says. And not only on work, but he also does this at home, where he feels too lazy to do the dishes or the laundry. Hoseok loves him, loves him like a brother, but he has to learn to say no. Both for his and Jimin's sake, otherwise, he will find himself while beating his ass. Hoseok takes another turn, where Jin's room is, but before he could open the door, someone does it before him.

Hoseok barely holds himself from crashing on you, his eyes wide open due to the sudden move. A little whimper leaves his lips, but you were too busy to hear that or even see him. He goes silent after seeing the tears on your eyes, the pain, and uncertainty on your face. A very familiar face with the familiar emotions on it. Hoseok's mouth takes an 'o' shape, eyes watching you to getting away from him.

While trying to understand what just happened, he enters the room after knocking two times. A line appeared between his brows, familiar yet unknown feeling fills him, he wants to shake his body, head to toe. ''Is she?'' he doubts, eyes finding his friends who have the same confusion on his face. Hoseok couldn't understand why he was feeling this way, and why he was happy to see you again. He lets a deep breath, closing the door before heading to the chair, and sits where you just left. ''Well, it's a small world, huh?'' Jin laughs as he said something funny, but Hoseok crinkles his nose, gives him a blank stare in return.

''Wait... she is pregnant?'' his eyes went round, for some reason he couldn't bring these two things together, even though not knowing you enough to come up with a character analysis. ''Yes, but good news, she wasn't drunk, rather than what we think,'' Jin gave a half-smile, open his arms to emphasize the good news he was giving.

On the contrary to his friend, this news wasn't good for Hoseok. He remembered how you looked down in the dump the day he first saw you, and after seeing you with tears on your eyes, he felt heartbroken. He didn't know you well, but he couldn't help but want to reach you and talk to you about this.

''Hobi, don't tell me that you are thinking about talking to her or something... please,'' Jin grunted after seeing how sadness clouded his friend's features. Jin knew well enough that Hoseok would do something such a thing. He couldn't understand why, but Hoseok always tried to help others, even without knowing them, so Jin was sure that he would that once again.

Just like Jin afraid of Hoseok's whole face lit up, he throws the file he holds in his hand at Jin's desk before leaving his office in hurry. The doctor hit his face with his palm, shaking his head in disbelief. ''He never learns,'' he sighs, grabbing the file for distracting himself from his too friendly friend.

While Jin is already focusing on the work, Hoseok finds himself while eavesdropping the conversation you have with your mother, as he heard you calling the person as 'mom' over the phone. He didn't mean to overhear your phone call or acting like a creep once again, but he couldn't approach you after seeing you on the phone, in a deep conversation. He was just going to wait until you finish your call, as he said to himself, but courage left his body after you get up from the bench. His body betrays himself, and he stands there only to watch you getting away once again.

''Aish... stupid legs,'' he scoffs, leaning the back of his head to the wall, chewing on his bottom lip. He swears himself to come to your side when he sees you again. And his instincts say him that he will see you again.

Fried eggs, boiled eggs, or any kind of eggs, it didn't matter how they made it, or why they made. You hate it. You hate it with all of your presence. While the scent of the very disgusting thing starts to spread, there is no way for you to refrain from jerking your body from your bed, hitting your toes to every possible object in your room, thanks to your sleepy head. This is how you start your beautiful day.

Spasming and ratching above your toilet, nails digging into the napkin you hold one of your hands, as your life was depending on it.

As you barely hold your head up and eyes still tightly shut, you prayed to not dripping your newly cleaned floor. Fortunately, throwing up with closed eyes wasn't your first time, but they were only caused by your drunkness, rather than pregnancy.

And this is your story how you found yourself above on the toilet, pouring everything inside of you. Your nose crinkled at the sight, pushing the flush after throwing the napkin that you wiped your mouth. Morning sickness officially trying to end your life, as it was interrupting your sleep every morning, which a pregnant woman needs sleep. And stealing your food, vitamins, and all the other beneficial objects from your body. Also, the things that a pregnant woman most needed.

After you lift yourself from the ground and splashing cold water to your face, a little drop takes a track from your sleeves, dripping the white cotton rug. When the very hideous smell hits, closer this time, you stop wiping your face to the towel. No... no. He did not do that.

Your eyes find the man's big grin in the mirror, but his grin fades after seeing your petrified glares staring the pan he holds with big confidence. ''Don't you dare to take one step closer,'' you warn the man with red hair, eyes darting over the pan and his rounded eyes. His eyebrows waggled, holding the pan a little higher to your dismay. ''Aigo... I present to you the best breakfast and this is my reward? And I'm waiting here for a big fat thanks. What a shame...''

''Tae, just hold that scum far away from me!''

''Stop being a brat and thank me, you brat!'' he pouts while holding out the pan, but his eyes sparkled with horror after seeing you cover your mouth while letting a loud gag. ''You are just being dramatic here,'' he says, turning his back at you, but he holds himself from making a sound while visibly ratching. If Taehyung had a list of weird habits of him, throwing up after seeing, or hearing someone throwing up would be on the list. He makes a speed walk in your corridor, trying not to hear your sound.

You push the flush once again while listing how to kill someone before getting physically fight in your mind. Poisoning is the first thing to comes across your mind, but you let those thoughts slide from your mind before heading inside. He was too young to die anyway.

The red-haired man lets out a big sigh, the brooding eyes meet with yours. ''I still can't believe that you are pregnant,'' he throws the last cherry tomato to his mouth, chewing it loudly. ''and when are you going to visit Yuri, she is still super surprised,'' he says nonchalantly while making a small sandwich with salami and the fried egg.

''You mean my mom?'' you questioned, voice comes out hoarse as you hold your nose while sending him deadly glares. ''and can you just not eat this today?'' you gestured the salami and the egg, turning your head to another side, trying to hold your gag.

Taehyung scoffs, murmuring how you destroyed the beautiful morning for him, but he can't take the risk of making you vomit all over the kitchen, so he moves them away from you. ''Better?'' he asks after opening the kitchen window, and you nod appreciatively. ''Yuri-... I mean your mother called me after you gave her the news, and told me everything. I hope you won't get back with that bastard because we said pretty good things behind him,'' he plastered a smile on his face, adjusting his hair by brushing it with his hand.

''I'm still upset with you if you haven't realized it. I'm your best friend and you didn't even bother to give me a call. I wait for three days, but nothing.'' he rolled his eyes, arms crossed above his chest.

Well, he did have a point by being upset with you, but you hold yourself from giggling as you remembered his face when he comes to your door yesterday, at two o'clock. Eyes of him seizing you in disbelief, one of his hand resting on his chest, above his heart, shaking his head side to side, slowly. He emerged inside, telling you how angry and upset he was, but as you were pregnant he wasn't going to yell at you and make the baby sad. Rather, he gave you the 'how could you' look for a whole night long. And, for your belief, it was worse than him yelling at you.

He would scold you when he can, between changing every fabric that contains the very memories of your ex, aside with his scent. The scent that tearing your heart, suffocates you to death. He would be cursing and swearing in every two minutes behind your ex, send him the most negative thoughts, mentally. You hardly convince him to send his stuff to charity, and not to burn.

In his defense, burning them would clear the bad aura he left behind. More likely, that may or may not ease the fire and the hate Taehyung feels about him. Probably won't, you guessed.

''This is all new for me Tae... Even I can't believe that I'm pregnant,'' you shared, taking a sip from your tea. The weird taste of it made you scrunch your face, but Taehyung made you this saying it was good for a pregnant woman. ''And before I visit my mom, I have to get used to being like this,'' you peek a glance to your belly. As you said to him, it was too new for you to face your mother with a living creature in your stomach.

Yet, you don't think you will ever get used to this feeling.

''Okay...'' he nods, licks the chocolate from his fork. But soon after, he gets up and tells you that he had enough of this gloomy atmosphere. He cleans the kitchen, and not letting you help him even though you try, he kicks you out from your kitchen. After he finishes, he tries to guess if it's a she or a he, or maybe neither in his defense. Asks you a lot of questions about pregnancy, makes a couple of jokes about how you knocked up and then he starts to look for baby clothes. When he can't decide what to buy, he calls your mother, but the conversation even comes to your highly charismatic doctor, and you show them his picture.

It's not the best side of him as it was in the hospital site, still, it was enough to drop Taehyung's chin to the ground. He threatens you to stay away from him, narrows his eyes to reassure you that he was serious, but you just put a couple of slaps on his shoulder between in your laughs.

''There are people out there, looking like a statue, plus, a brain on their skull. Yet, my naive daughter chooses the stupid one and an ugly stupid,'' your mother sighs, shakes her head, causing Taehyung to burst into laughter. You on the other hand whine and pout the very offensive comment your mother did. Not that she is not right, but how could you possibly know that your three-year relationship would end like that. ''I hope this baby chooses to be like you. At least from the outside,'' another laughter raises from your best friend, your mom won't stop teasing you and ganging up with the redhead.

''I thought you two would be the wind on my back, not to spit on my face,'' the old woman looks at you the same way as the younger adult. Eyes narrowed, lips pressed together. Both of them try to understand what was that supposed to mean, and you giggle, still surprised by the similarity of the old lady and the young male. It's not a wonder how people thought Taehyung as your mother's son, rather than you.

''She is just making up words to get us, don't fool by it, Yuri!'' Taehyung warns, mouth twists in disgust and disbelief. And the called woman agrees, hums, and nods her head. You were being a third-wheel between your biological mother and your very best friend. At least you were feeling, and you start to pout. Arms crossed over your chest, having an attitude without making a big fuss.

Soon after you talk hours and hours, Taehyung and your mom got your sympathy before he gets up to head his home, insists on making you come with him, but you refuse for thousand times. ''You know I'd stay but the couch isn't good for my back,'' you giggle before kissing him goodbye and he leaves after telling you to call him for even the smallest thing.

The ease on your shoulders fades, sorrow gathers on your chest soon after Taehyung left. Once again, you are grateful to have him in your life. From the first time, you two met in the elementary school, said man never left your side, up this day. You two hold the hands of each other when you had your first vaccine, and never stop holding. Somewhere the friendship of the two turned to the friendship of the four when Taehyung befriends with Yoongi and Namjoon.

You love them, adore them for the chaos they bring to your life. That's why you kept your mouth shut about this news, as you knew that they would go crazy, won't leave your side for a moment to be a helping hand. For having and pressing that kind of attention, you should get prepared before. You need to accept the situation, first.

Six-week pregnancy hits you hard. Not just the morning sicknesses, but also sore, swollen breast due to the change of the shape. Yes, they look bigger than ever and you like how they filled your oversized bra, but the light pain made you uncomfortable. You try to massage them on the shower with your shower gel to ease the ache and constantly refused the help of Yoongi. He offered you to help with the massage thing, which you only sighed and shake your head in disbelief.

Side of this, you start to pee for like a thousand times a day. Day or night didn't matter, and you always find yourself sleeping on the toilet, waking up to a new need to pee. It was frustrating, annoying, and blood boiling.

You push the flush once again, adjusting your clothes before heading to the work. Before passing your sneakers to your feet, you take a glance at your long-forgotten heels. Pointy, tight shoes only manage to cause you more burden on these days, so you decide to stay away from them. Who would like to have sore feet while dealing with pregnancy? Not you.

''Give me a break...'' you turn the wheel, heading to another parking lot as some jerk decides to put his car to your spot. There is plenty of parking lot, but this one was the closest to the elevator and you didn't want to park another place to walk all the way down here again. Because of your unstable emotions, you feel too tired lately, worn out, and wanted to cry easily.

Your hold tightened around the wheel, head slowly falls on it after parking your car. You try to breathe, but it's useless. Everything feels too much, eyes tearing up, while defeat sits on your shoulders. Too much failure. Too much loneliness. Too much agony crept towards you, to your chest. All these days, you acted like there was nothing wrong with you. Like you weren't dying inside, like happy to be pregnant. Or, happy to be dumped.

Long story short, you weren't. You were waking up to vomit on your throat, ache on your chest, and the first thing you see was your dirty toilet before heading to work. A cramp grows in your chest, won't letting you breathe that you need desperately. Hiccups fall by your lips one by one, just like the tears on your face. Does it have to feel like this? Does it have to hurt like this, you didn't know.

So many people want to make you happy, who will be your side from the start to end, but somehow this feeling of loneliness won't leave your mind, your heart. You want only one of them on your side, even though you don't accept to be pregnant. But the only person you want on your side, wouldn't be your side.

You reach to your purse, take a napkin to adjust your face. The business won't work itself, as your boss always says. People need games to play. Most likely, rich people.

Elevator doors open with an irritating voice, too old to continue working you think. Before you take a step, you hear your name right beside you, causing you to startle. ''Did you made breakfast? If not, join me.'' the man in nothing but sweatpants and a simple shirt, greats you at the door with a big grin. He wishes you won't find a lame excuse to refuse him.

''Ohh, Damian... you scared me!'' hand placed above your chest, you seized the man. One of his hand in his pocket, mug on the other one. The suiting scent of the coffee fills your nostrils. ''Well, I don't have an appetite for breakfast,'' while you press your lips together, his grin widens on his face, almost covering it completely.

''Coffee then,'' he turns on his shoes, not letting you say anything before heading to the small kitchen in the office. You sigh, but feeling too tired to turn him down and to deal with his insists. ''Actually, I would like to have a tea instead,'' he turns, eyes widened with your sudden request. Both because you really did follow him, and choose tea over coffee. The brown-haired man knew you more than three years now, and he knew you well enough that you would always choose coffee over tea.

''That's also good,'' he doesn't want to waste his chance by asking you too much question, so he just smiles. He refreshes his coffee, while you take a sip from your tea. Smooth peach fills in your breath, warms your stomach, nose wrinkles with the warm feeling. ''Thank you,'' you hold your mug up, bowing your head slightly with a smile.

''Aish... I want to kick his head and his ass. Why he has to be a jerk like this!'' right before the man who stands on the kitchen talks again, his mouth shuts as the voice of long heels, and whinings fill the room. You great the woman with long black hair with your head, while she takes her place on the other side of the table. ''Who thinks he is? I know he is the head of the creative department, but ughhh-- he just annoys me,'' you press your laugh, while the girl covers her face with her freshly manicured hands.

You exchange looks with Damian, he doesn't hide his smile while playing the hair on his neck. ''Don't you think he is annoying? Y/N?'' hand on your wrist disconnects your stare, and you turn to see round pair of eyes, burning with rage. You found this oddly amusing and also too familiar.

''Stop pushing Y/N to talk bad about her friend Nara,'' Damian finishes his drink after scolding Nara with an irony. You let your smile out, feeling better after burying your anger and fears to the back of your mind. In fact, you were too busy to think about your low life at this office. ''Fun fact, he is also my boss,'' you narrow your eyes, pointing your forefinger at his face, ''not just yours,''

He looks at your finger, then behind you and Nara before speaking. ''Speak of the devil,'' he jokes, waving his hand. You both turn your backs to meet the man you gossip about, Nara lets out a loud groan, hands covering her face once again.

''I didn't know that I was paying you to chat all day,'' the man in a cream suit leans on the kitchen bench, raising his brow. ''Well, you don't pay us exactly,'' you raise your brow, imitating him but fail to hide your mischief on your tone.

''If so, don't come at me asking for a raise,'' Nara rolls her eyes after hearing his annoying voice. She really finds his voice annoying. Irritating, and mostly his voice always drives her crazy.

''Joon, you wouldn't do that. Not to your best worker,'' you pout, but both Damian and Nara protest what you said. They find your high confidence ridiculous and presents their objections. But the head of the creative department can't handle the mess and raise his voice to gather the attention on him. ''Okay, okay, okay. There is no raise near soon, so save this fight for another meeting, alright?''

He holds his hand up, regretting to open the topic of the raise. Both you and Damian let a light chuckle, while Nara rolling her eyes at him. Namjoon sends a cringy wink to her before leaving the kitchen, causing Nara to make vomiting sounds.

Bitter liquid finds its way up to your throat, so you choose to run from there, following Namjoon. Avoiding the numbness on your throat for not to humiliate yourself on the work by vomiting and then explaining why you were vomiting all around the floor. Aish... you would never want to experience that.

''Don't you have an appointment with--'' between in your overthinking, you cut his words with a loud whine. You close the door behind you and face him. The so-called boss looks at you with round eyes, mouth parted slightly due to your sudden reproach. ''Did I say something wrong?''

''No... of course not Joonie,'' you give a little break, scratching your neck in embarrassment. Not that he said something wrong, but more likely what he was going to say would only cause more gossiping and a big fuss that you couldn't handle in this exact moment. You take a seat in front of his desk, rubbing your palms on your thighs. ''I just... don't-- not ready for everyone to hear, you know?''

Namjoon's heart aches for a second, seeing you ill at ease and weary makes him upset. He wasn't that oblivious to not recognize how tired you look with the dark bags under your eyes, cursory makeup you do to look more lively, hiding how you feel actually. He just wants to take you from this nightmare you live, but he is too powerless to do so.

''Sorry Y/N... I'll try to be more careful,'' you smile at him, waving your hand like it's not a big deal, but he knows. ''But, you do have an appointment, right?''

''Yes, I have,'' you pause to take a sip from a bottle of water he has on his desk. Out of the blue, you feel dehydrated. ''That's why I barge in here. I need to leave a little bit early today... You know what for,'' Namjoon sized you up with a fond smile on his lips, and you knew that he was up to something, probably going to say something to boil your blood.

''You came here to ask permission, as I'm your boss, huh?'' opposing to his cocky, annoying expression, you could feel your jaw clenching while eyes twitching. Everyone thought having a friend who is your boss would have benefit for you but in reality, it was annoying. He continuously bragging about this, even after your shifts, while having a joyful meal. ''Joon, I swear that I will sue you for sexual harassment,'' you glare at him, but he lets a scoff.

''As they would believe you,'' his finger goes between you and himself, forehead creased. ''I'm sorry but obviously, you are not my type,'' you literally growl after his statement, rubbing your face with your palms. What a frustrating human being...

''I'm leaving,'' you get up between his laughs and attempts to make you stay longer, but you shut the door behind. While sighing and heading to your desk, you feel sorry for Nara. That woman tries not to kill him and tries not to lose her mind because of all his bullshits. You send all of your blessings to her. For hers and Namjoon's sakes.

''Tell Jimin that if he won't hand me the research I assigned him until the end of this week, I swear the god I'll fire his pre-nurse ass--'' when you enter the room after knocking, two pair of rounded eyes lands on you. You eye them with wide eyes, not expecting to hear these words from your Doctor. ''I'm sorry... I knocked on the door but--''

''Y/N! I was waiting for you-- come in,'' despite his red face and visible veins on his neck, his tone comes out sweet like the first appointment you had with him. You give a faint smile in return with a little head bow, closing the door behind you. ''I just need a minute, okay?'' you nod.

Standing under the white light, eyes focused on your shoes. You should have stopped chewing your lips when you feel nervous, but you never manage it. You liked Doctor Kim, but being in this room will always make you nervous and tense. Being here made your nerves go crazy, pain on the chest and the reality of your situation would always hit you hard in here. Realizing the truth, the truth of being in an unwanted pregnancy haunts you every time you find yourself in here. It's only the second appointment you had, and you shouldn't feel this worn out by this, but you know that every time, every appointment will feel like this. Stressed, vulnerable, and trapped.

You were too caught up with your own thoughts that you could only hear someone was calling your name after a couple of minutes. ''--Pardon me for keeping you wait, but I had to deal with these papers. So, how are we feeling?'' Doctor Kim's familiar gentle smile stands on his lips while addressing you, hands clenched each other on his desk. You open your mouth to say something. Mostly lying about how good you were, how everything was so great, but the pair of eyes catch your attention.

Wide eyes staring you in shock and curiosity, lips turn into a pout, slightly parted. Soft brown hair stands on his head, matches with his brown orbs. Very familiar glows he got in his eyes, you think. Very familia--

''Oh let me introduce you to Hoseok,'' Doctor gets up, holding his hand up, pointing the man who confuses your mind. ''This is our greatest nurse, Jung Hoseok--''

''We should stop meeting like this,'' the nurse holds his hand up, waiting for you to do the same, but he surprised you with his absurdity. You would remember if you met a man like him. Men who smile like the sweetest peach. The smile that warms your stomach for no reason and the uncertainty made you uncomfortable. The same irritations you feel when you met with the clingy stranger. The day you learn--oh no... ''You always look the same. With the same dead eyes, I guess,''

''How--why? You?'' you feel the heat crawling on your neck, bottom lip shaking with the need to say something, but you only be able to sigh.

You did watch a lot of movies. Both stupid and semi-stupid. Coincidences, serendipities, and all the unexpected meetings you didn't believe. You watched it all, and you gain mature enough not to fall for those stupid movies. Not letting yourself keeping your hopes high, but if you would do it if you keep your hopes high, you wouldn't want to waste those cute coincidences with these two strangers. But as your eyes go between Doctor Kim and the nurse named Hoseok, you could tell that you waste all of your luck.

Not that you believe though.

Hoseok feels his heart race quicken, even though he tries to hold himself being obvious, he can't control the shake on his hand. To his luck, you are too caught up with your thoughts to realize it. You were too caught up with the thought of turning your back and run to take fresh air, but that would be so extra. Even for you, so you just stay there.

When you finally hold his hand to shake it, he gives a relieved sigh. And you don't know why his hand feels so soft and warm. Hoseok's let out a little 'oh' sounds when you take your hand from his grip, pout stands on his lip with the wide eyes because of your sudden move. But you didn't want him to take his hand from your grip, so that's mean you should take it. There is no way that you will stand in there, holding hands with an odd stranger. No way.

''Did you drink the amount of water I ask, Y/N?'' thanks to your doctor, the most awkward moment you had with the complete stranger eases in time. You nod before he explains why he asked for you to drink water. Things that he explained before, but you were too distracted with pitying yourself and having zero clues about this. ''--we need this in case of any abnormalities on the placenta, checking the cervix for any kind of change...'' you just lost in his words, the unknown words you can't understand babbling in your ears, but your blood run colds when you heard the only familiar word. ''--and the best part, you could hear the heartbeat of the baby. You'd want this, don't you?'' contrary to his smile, you stare him blank.

You stand there bewildered. Heart pumping the blood faster, cold enough to freeze your fingertips, and the weight on your chest send tears to your eyes. You did not come here for this. You did not.

Hoseok's eyes wander between you and his friend. He feels anxious about the way you look. The way you bug-eyed looking Jin, chest moving up and down the way he never sees before, and he thinks it's going to explode. The tight and wobbly voice that comes from you even worries him more. ''I--I didn't... Do--do I have to do... that?''

You don't know how desperate or pathetic you sound, you didn't care. The only thing you know is that you weren't ready for this. Don't want to do this. The doctor sees the tears, but stays and sounds calm. ''Of course, you don't have to. But I believe it would be better to listen, both for you and the baby.'' his modulated voice ease your heart just a little bit, but you can't understand how this affects you better? Or the baby. ''You can think about this while changing your clothes, okay?''

You nod. Too worn out to speak, to find your voice.

While you drowning in the thoughts of whether you should do it or not, having a mini-crisis inside of your mind, with the knock at the door you flinch. A frown takes its place on your face, and you open the door after adjusting the gown you just wear. Brooding chocolates immediately find yours, size you up with the same pout on his lips.

Unintentionally, you look down before closing the door partly. Being partly naked in front of him made you uncomfortable, even though he is a nurse. ''Hey,'' he waves his hand in small, tries to smile but it fades because of your deadpan look. You are not in the mood for unwanted conversations. ''I just wanted to... wanted to check on you and ask if you want me to--'' his voice goes so quiet that you couldn't hear what he says in the end. Seeing how he blushes, you understand that he says something you would refuse.

''You wanted to ask?'' you extend your head, raise a brow to make him repeat.

''--stay with you,''

''What?''

''Would you want me to stay with you while listening to the heartbeats of your baby?'' he said in a small panicky voice, eyes searching your face to get ready to hear your reply.

You stay dumbfounded. It is something stupid, even sounds stupid. You would refuse this. Refuse this immediately. Without thinking about it. Before your heart warms and the hammering on your chest eases. But you open your lips to ask the question you shouldn't ask. ''Is it okay for you to do it?''

''Well, I'm a nurse... and if you want this?'' Hoseok wasn't expecting this. He wasn't expecting you to agree on this, wasn't expecting to see the way your eyes glow. The very professional nurse wasn't expecting his heart to melt with the way your eyes blink before replying to him. But it does.

''Then, I want you to stay. With me,''

You had no idea why you agree with him on this. You had no idea how to feel when you open your legs to Doctor Kim, right before you hear the heartbeats. ''You will feel a little pressure, just stay relax,'' the soothing tone of your doctor returns, and just like he said, you feel the uncomfortable pressure inside. When you clench nailing your palms, squeezing your eyes shut, a hand wraps around yours.

Normally you would flinch with the sudden touch, or feel uneasy. But the way he holds your hand soothes you, the way his light squeezes on your hand makes everything a little bit better. These were unusual things to feel, probably hormones made you feel like this, but you feel grateful to him for staying on your side.

The way you think 'not him again' when you saw him again, now left its place to gratitude for you.

''Okay, I think we are ready to hear the heartbeats, huh?'' when your eyes met with Doctor Kim's, you forget how to breathe. Breath stuck on your lungs, your stare stuck on his, and you stuck on the white stretcher. You feel overwhelmed after hearing the intense mechanical beats. You didn't know what to do, how to act after hearing the heartbeats. Agony crept towards your chest, the ache is physical to feel when you covered your chest with your palm. You feel doomed. Vulnerable. Broken.

Trying to swallow the bitter taste on your lips only made it worse, tears shimmered in your eyes. This was all real. You were pregnant, dumped, and all alone. Everything was happening and you weren't dreaming at all. You never wanted to cry out loud this much, to scream until your throat goes sore and maybe you would faint due to the tiredness. Maybe you would shut your eyes, and never open them again. You wanted to get rid of this ache.

''It's okay. It's going to be okay,'' Hoseok couldn't help himself from patting your arm, trying to ease your mind. Seeing the tears on your face, the way you squeeze his hand when the beats filled in the room, devastated him. Yes, he only saw you three times, but you never looked this bad. This injured.

''Y/N, are you okay? Can you talk?'' even though you want to reply to him with words, it looked impossible to make a sound. You nod, trying to tell your doctor that you were okay, despite its a lie. ''Would you want to stay alone for a moment?''

You didn't know if you nod again, or made a 'hmph', but both of them left the room and leave you alone with your gloomy thoughts. Not that you know what to think, how to feel, or how to act. Why can't someone decides this for you? Why it has to be you? You didn't ask for this. You never wanted this. This... baby. You never felt this alone in your life. Down in the dumps.

Trying to move was hard, due to the heaviness of your body, your mind. Numbness takes over both your mind and your body, as you try to change your clothes. Lifeless movement only occurs as a handicap on your way to the door, plus, you weren't ready to see anyone. But to your dismay, there was only Doctor Kim, sitting on his desk and writing. Probably for you.

''Ah. Are you feeling better?'' he wondered, lifting his head from his computer. Eyes of him examining your actions, your face to catch your true feelings while you gave him a faint smile. You answer him before wiping your forehead. All the stress made you sweaty. ''Oh, I'm. I'm okay, thank you,''

He smiles, points his front, invites you to sit. And you do as he says, taking your place while wondering where Hoseok went from the back of your mind. It was the best not to see him after your little breakdown, but still, it didn't stop you from wondering. ''There is nothing wrong. Baby and you look good, there is nothing to worry about,'' he gave a half-smile before continuing, ''but... Let me ask this Y/N, even though it sounds like I'm crossing the line. Would you think about seeing a psychologist? It's okay to have breakdowns and having troubles as a pregnant woman, and it's not something to abstain about.''

''I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable, but as your doctor, I'm offering you this. This is our second appointment and you had troubles within both of them. It can be helpful for you, and the baby.''

Keeping eye contact was something hard for you to adjust, so you just stare at your fingers, play with them. Although you know he was right and trying to be helpful, you offended. You can't help but feel disparaged. Feel stupid. Being this obvious about your situation was your fault, crying and looking like a wreck. ''I'll think about... it,'' you sniffled, wiping your nose before meeting with his gaze.

''That's great. You don't have to do it, but if you do, that would be great for you Y/N,'' he said with a quiet empathy, smiling fondly to reassure you. And it wasn't all act. The blonde doctor sincerely wanted to be sure of your health. Both physically and mentally.

Then, he gave you a paper filled with what you should do incase of fatigues and constipation, side with the essential tests you should do, and the multivitamins you should take. And you left his room after saying a pale goodbye. Probably he was pitying you, but you can't do anything about that, don't you? Well, there is always a choice where you don't cry like a baby every time you came here, but that already wiped from the list, you sighed.

Exhaustion fills your muscles, your bones after finishing all the tests and check-ups. They were advising you not to go hard on yourself, even though they wear you out with all of these works. Not to be dramatic but you were the last one in this hospital, without counting the doctors and all. With droopy movements of your feet, you head to the exit, imagining your comfy bed, and the midnight snacks you will burry your face. Ahh, you could feel your heart getting warm with the thought of your bed.

One-step, and you are out, leaving this place, and the heartbeats of the baby behind. Before terrifying misery stuck to your chest, you flinch by the touch on your shoulder. ''Oh, shit! It--It's me,'' you watch the man in dark clothes holding his head, grumbling with a pout on his lips.

''Ah.. I'm sorry, but why are sneaking me from behind?'' you try to lean on him to give a good look on his head, but he steps back.

''Did you have to hit me?'' he sighs, rubbing his head while still pouting. ''Gee... you got heavy hands, don't you?'' you try your best not to laugh at the sight, but he was forcing your limits while whining like a crybaby, all pouty and still rubbing his head. ''I'm--... sorry,''

''Aish... and you laughing?'' you pressed your lips together to hold your laughter behind, but you failed after seeing his smile. ''I'm smiling because of my rage, don't dare to think that I forgive you,''

''C'mon, I didn't hit you that hard,'' his eyes went round, scanning you from head to toe, hand on his chest in disbelief. ''and now you making a big deal of it.''

He lets out a gasp as he caught off guard. ''I could have brain damage,'' he mocked, taking his hand from his chest.

You both stare at each other, without saying another word. You didn't know what to say, and he didn't know how to ask the question he wanted to. Hoseok glanced up to the ceiling, swallowing his words with loud gulps while you chewing your lip, and staring your shoes. In three minutes of silence, you couldn't understand the heat that was placed on your cheeks, as well as the quivering in your chest. It just made you uncomfortable, and you start to move on your feet.

''I think I should--''

''Can I ride you home--''

Both of you choke in your words, staring at each other with wide eyes, and two pairs of red cheeks. You should say no, and head to your car and never look back, as this better for you. But part of you just want to accept his offer, and let him drive you home. ''I came here with my car,'' you told, but wishing him to find a decent excuse to drive you home.

''Oh. It's okay then. We will see each other again,'' he cocks his head to the side, ''right?'' Hoseok didn't mind looking desperate if he doesn't look like some pervert, it was okay to look desperate. He wanted to talk to you, know you better, and maybe help you...? He didn't know what would you say, but couldn't help but want to spend more time with you.

''Yes. I mean, I'll come here often, so...'' you won't except but you disappointed when he agrees not to drive you that easily. Even though, this was the sensible thing to do. He waved his hand before turning his back and leave you alone, reminding you to take care while walking away.

You waved back, saying 'goodbye' while forcing a smile. When he disappears, you hit your head for acting like some dumbass. Why did you want him to take you home? Who was he to drive you? Were you always this idiot when it's come to a handsome man?

Handsome?

No. This was all hormones talking and thinking. It couldn't be you. You didn't find him handsome. Or cute. No.

Now you are going to your car, and drive it to your house. To your bed and snacks. The bed where you sleep alone, and eating your depression snacks. Yes, sounds like a good plan.

#heartsforbts #bangtanhq #bangtanarmynet #houseofddaeng #btsgoldnet #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #hyunglinenetwork #hoseok x reader #hoseok x you #hoseok fanfic #hoseok fluff #hoseok angst #jung hoseok #painkiller #dylanxmin

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lizzy-williams · 4 years

Text

𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 2

🔥Warnings: slight angst, drug references, drug dealing, language.

🦎Theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tC-FOXioDo

In Your Arms by Sunbeam Sound Machine

((He do be vibin tho))

masterlist

𝘠𝘖𝘜 𝘏𝘈𝘋 𝘉𝘌𝘌𝘕 taking care of Newt for weeks now after he was released from the burn unit, his burns getting better slowly, soon enough turning into scars. You took over his drug dealings, partly because Newt didn’t have the strength, but mostly because he didn’t want to scare away customers from the product.

But there was something that Newt insisted on having. He wanted to have the apartment as hot as hell, heaters in every corner of his place. Without the heaters, he would say he was freezing, and it would bother him enough to where he wouldn’t sleep.

You were getting used to the intense heat that went through Newt’s apartment. He was excited about it, mainly because it was an excuse for you to wear less clothing.

You were usually the one to tend his wounds, and take care of him. You ended up just living with him.

Finally, after 4 long weeks of restless nights and illegal transactions, he was finally fully healed, the burns and blisters turning into smoothed over scars. But he looked similar to two-face from batman.

But even after he was healed, he insisted on keeping the heaters on, and you didn’t mind. What happened to him would most likely cause PTSD, so whatever made him comfortable was fine with you.

You pulled up to the apartment building, people outside enjoying the nice weather. It was an especially warm day in Woodmere, Louisiana that day. You waved to a few people that waved your way as you brought the groceries up the stairs. Of course, it was nothing substantial.

Cups of noodles, hot chocolate, waffle mix, anything and everything warm or served hot. That’s what he liked. But it was also nice for you to also get out, so you didn’t get heatstroke, but your body was slowly getting more used to it.

You walked to the door, the black one with a white painting of a newt on it, giving the secret knock. Seconds later the door opened, stopped by the chain lock. As you caught a glimpse of his face, his eyes went soft. The door closed and was reopened.

“Anyone follow you?” he asked, the heat brushing over your body like a hairdryer as I entered.

He looked out the doorframe, closing the door once again, locking every lock. You went into the kitchen, setting the bags down, Newt follows, the red silhouettes, and shadows covering the area.

“Heard from your cousin lately?” you asked, knowing he followed you.

“Yeah, I gave her some more product. She’s got some good connections.” he leaned up against the kitchen’s doorframe.

“That’s good,” you smiled, putting the groceries away, “How you feelin’?” you asked, looking back at him.

“Good. But I would be better if you stayed here for the rest of the night,” he sighed.

“Newt, honey, you know that I gotta go into work today,”

“But it’s not like you need the money,” he objected, walking closer to you, now leaning against the counter.

“I know...,” you thought about it. You really didn’t need to. He was right, “I guess I could just...,” you turned to him, your body inches from his, “Call in sick...” as he smiled at your words.

“Give me a kiss...,” he muttered, pulling you closer, his arms pulling you by your waist closer to him.

You were only recently starting to kiss him again, but the burns didn’t bother you. You were happy to be able to touch him... love him, be close to him. Hell, even sleep in the same bed.

“Mario Kart?”

“Hell yes,” you responded, dragging him to the couch.

******

After you played Mario Kart, you ended up watching a few movies. You eventually ended up laying together on the couch, his arms wrapped around you from behind you as you heard him dozing off.

You shifted more towards him. You missed this. Being able to touch him, kiss him. You also loved getting closer with Robin, you two actually spent more time together.

You did research while he was recovering, and actually found out what was going on, and the technical name for what happened with Newt... what his “superpower” was. Spontaneous combustion. Otherwise known as extreme heat thermoregulation.

You couldn’t explain it. But you wouldn’t dare go to anyone professional. He would test on him, and then you’d never see him again. And you didn’t think you could bare that.

“Newt? You still up?” you muttered.

After a few seconds without a response, you sighed, picking up his scarred hand, tracing over the bumps and cracks of the scars. Normally with third-degree burns all over the body, it would take close to a lifetime to heal all the burns. But at least the pull kinda saved him from that. And you were somewhat thankful.

But you couldn’t help but want to try it for yourself... what was your power? Newt said it himself... everyone was different. But after he got burned, he also told you one of the deadly side effects... which was that one hit would kill you. But on the other hand... superpowers.

You slowly got up, doing your best not to wake your boyfriend as you did. You were never really one to try the product. You only ever did weed. Heavy drugs were a no-go. Were these pills really drugs though? There were no laws against them yet, and yes they were lethal, but so are knives, and they weren’t illegal because everyone has some in their home.

You went into the back room, jumping over the large hole in the middle of the floor. You opened the door to the backdoor, making eye contact with the freezer. That’s where we kept the pills that were for you two, just in case something went wrong.

You took a frozen pizza box, shaking a case of the pill into your hand, putting the box back in the freezer, closing it. You opened the case, taking the pill between your fingers, looking at it.

“Curiosity killed the cat,” you joked to nobody but yourself.

You twisted it, flinching back as you did. Your nerves were racing. It was like the first time you were about to smoke weed. You were about to be introduced to a whole new way to look at things.

You took a deep breath in, putting it between your teeth. Here we go.

“STOP!” you heard Newt yell from the end of the hallway, making direct eye contact with you, “Don’t fucking move.”

Now or never.

You suddenly downed it, the feeling of the pill going down your throat making you shiver as Newt raced towards you.

You began to twitch and convulse just like Newt did when he took Power. You felt your insides burn and clench, the most mind-splitting headache you had ever had take over your brain.

“FUCK!” You yelled out in pain.

But soon the pain died down to a dull ache as your head started to fill with words that weren’t your own.

“Fuck, what did it do to her,” you heard Newt’s voice say and you looked over, shocked to find that his lips weren’t moving.

“What?”

“Fuck, I can’t tell what her power is... at least she didn’t die. Thank fuck, I couldn’t stand losing her” you watched in awe.

You were telekinetic.

“Babe... I can hear you...”

“I didn’t say anything...?”

“No, no,” you muttered, walking over to him, putting your hands on his face, “I can hear you...”

“What the fuck are you talking about, baby?”

“Think of something. Anything. Doesn’t matter what it is, just something.” you demanded, Newt skeptical but compliant.

“Weed. Robin. You.”

“Aw, that’s really sweet,” you commented.

“Holy shit, you read minds!!” he exclaimed, pulling you in, hugging you, “You’re gonna be okay!”

“Yeah, yeah I am,” you laughed.

“Thank fuck, thank fuck, thank fuck” he repeated in his head over and over and over.

“This could actually be... really useful,” he said, out loud, making you look up at him in confusion.

“How so?”

“Well, we’re drug dealers. It would be really useful to see what our customers are thinking. It would also be easier to tell a cop from a druggie. We could really use this...,”

“Alrighty then. Whatever you say, captain,”

******

You had been using the pills all week. And it was really starting to take a tole on your body. And the extreme heat that filled Newt’s apartment really wasn’t helping.

You were now planted on the couch, taking as much Advil as you could, taking just at the suggested dose.

“Hey, baby,” Newt said gently, bringing you a bowl of soup in the kitchen, setting it in your lap, “How you feelin?”

“Tired. Sick. Tired.” you grumbled after mumbling a ‘thank you’ for the soup.

“We can give you some of my leftover pain-killers? Maybe those would help your head calm down.”

At this point, you were willing to try anything just to get rid of the throbbing of your head. You nodded quietly, gently rubbing your temples. Newt leaned over and gave you a kiss on your bare shoulder (seeing as you only had a bra and underwear on due to the extreme heat) and stood up, most likely to get the drugs.

He soon returned, a glass full of water with ice and 2 pills, handing them to you. He then sat down on the couch with you, your body scooting over and placing a pillow on his lap before laying down your head, Newt beginning to watch the movie you had on for background noise, playing with your hair, gently gliding his hands over your scalp. His other hand was rubbing up and down your back, making you drowsy, the pain pills already starting to set in.

��I love you, Newt,” you muttered.

“I love you too, baby”

And with that, you began to fall asleep, comfortable in your lover’s arms.

((Ahhaha, I love writing Newt stuff, I’m obsessed with Project Power, go watch it so you can get some of the references I hid in both part 1 and 2. I’ll continue to make more stuff on him, blurbs, and stuff. Some will be connected to this fanfic, some will not.))

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psychemeanscure · 4 years

Text

PART 8

“Holy Sh*t. Jang! Did you just--- Urgh! You bastardo.”

A surprised curse blurts out into her mouth definitely, the moment she led her unprepared eyes upon the arrogant Jang Taeyoung who is just confidently came in to the room where she is. Only to receive an exasperating awe which also halts his steps for a second through its closet. Doubting eyes now landed to her. “Did I heard it right? You just cursed in English? That’s new eh?”

His very random casualty anyhow which she straightly did not entertain. Him who is finally settling a chosen cloth putting it for a bit on the backrest of his dressing table chair. while she in the other hand has to deal with it as usual. He’s only wearing a bathrobe, for Pete’s sake! She can’t still even oblige herself to turn her head to look at him. Waking up in an unfamiliar room was already a bewilderment for her, what more with this loco she is with. She almost seen half of his--- “Aish! Can you please wear something already?!” only answered by a smirk which she obviously unseen.

“Wait? Are you shy? What a news. So, Sung Eunyoung still knows how to get nervous, huh?”

Thus, she had no choice but to face him with a frowning look, remembering to seek her own confusions. “Tsk. Happy? Where am I anyway? And why am I with this thing?” pertaining to the IV inserted in her wrist certainly, as her gaze wanders to him who’s reaching a first aid kit from a bedside table.

“To detox the drug in you. And for the record, you’re in my penthouse.”

His firm answer indeed while she was shock, undecided between which she must confirm first. “What?” the sensible remark she can only utter then. Eyes still following onto him who’s now setting himself to grab a seat beside her on the bed. “Which of the two did you mean by that? I can’t follow.” Him who’s starting to get a cotton and sanitizer from the kit, which also led for the appearance of her anxiousness that she was now totally agitated settling her eyes between his movement and to her IV, including her unsettled answer as well.

“T-the pent--- I mean the drug. I was drug?!” her stuttering success words somehow, but not long enough to get her nervous the moment he finally holds her forearm that she quickly moves back. “Hey, what are you doing?” her prudent fight indeed, only to be hold back by him. “I’ve been doing this on my own, Sung Eunyoung. Trust me.”

Just to be answered by her hesitating groan, still. “Are you sure? Can’t you at least call a doctor instead?” thus a frustrating sigh went into him totally. “Seriously, woman? Who do you think settled this dammit Intravenous, and the hell who shot you a tranquilizer during your influence, huh?”

“You shot me a what?!” obviously another surprise for her. “You heard it. So, are we settled then?” only proceeded by her surrendering hum. “Good. Tss. You stubborn volatile.” His last statement then, before cautiously performing the removal of the IV. Not when he heard a whimper from her though who’s actually avoiding her eyes from her wrist. Reason for his little laugh as well. “You’re afraid after all. Is it blood or needle?” holding her temper not to explode. “Shut up. Just finish what you are doing will you?”

Only to hear another laugh from him. Somehow take the courage to look at him though, as she only notices the usual brushed up hair of him is on a hair down bangs for a while. ‘He looks good.’ As what her thoughts says otherwise. Later landed to the glimpse of his tattoos especially by the lower part of his neck. ‘se---‘

“I might melt anytime soon, Sung Eunyoung… You don’t have too fluster me, I already know I’m erotic.”

Before she could piece her second thought obviously, he already concluded it right. That she had to only clear her throat and avoid his gaze instead. Before deciding to dodge it by another reopening topic. “Uh. Hm. Right, tell me how did I got influenced then. What drug was it?” only to be answered by his hidden smirk as he welcomes to give her details.

“Ecstasy. So basically, the filthy Spanish dimwit poured a powder type in your drink and you carelessly bite it. The end.”

As if his tale-like story telling that he already expected the disbelief reaction to her who only manage to glance by her reflection through the window glass, out of frustration.

“Jesus. It literally slipped on my mind. He probably did it when I was focused to the gift h--- wait? Speaking of, where was i---“

“Burned.”

Somehow satisfied from what he did. “Ah. Okay.” That she just casually answered without objection. But to him was a bit unexpected. “I actually thought you’ll disagree. But after learning from you today, well I like it though. Good to know.” And with the last touch from the cotton and plaster tape on her wrist. He’s finally finished. “I did something crazy, aren’t I?”

Just to receive a sly smirking smile from him, as he even tilting his head for teases. “Want to go on details as well?” understanding his remark perhaps that her hair should be disheveled. Promptly realizing the white shirt and checkered pajama on her that surely his. As she was now fuming mad with the man beside her. “You take advantage of me?!”

Fully her accusations indeed after hastily throwing a pillow to his face. “Great. What a word for a thank you.” As he helplessly reached the thrown pillow somehow and putting it back on the bed. “Listen, woman. I honestly did not. Well fine, almost. And upon mine you were wearing, I called assistance. Now, does it answer your madness then?”

Crossing his arms as he gave the straight explanations to her. Only to see the doubting look on her, still. Cause by his aggravating sigh. “Do I now have to call for CCTV personnel?” scoffing in the end as she just chose to believe his words. Thus, he stands up after closing the first aid kit and place it back where it belonged.

“Anyhow. I had to go somewhere for a bit. I already called room service for your breakfast, though. You’ll just have to open the door for them. Unless you’re in a diet…” thus his quick reflexes of changing his clothes began that she had to curse him again as she just decided to went out of his bedroom first instead. Than implanting malicious images she never wished to see anyway. Loud banging of the door definitely, proceeding with her series of curses. “Urgh! This maldito bastardo, really.” Only to be answered by a laughter from him once more.

As she went nowhere to his living room couch. Frowning eyes still focused to the cursed room she went out. “Tss. This bastardo really get on my nerves. Aish.” Her last call of complains finally, before chooses to just wander her eyes to the features of his penthouse somehow. For it was also her first time to be inside it. Truly it is, for she always refused his invites. The hell will she dared too. Thus, she starts to stand up from the couch, roaming herself to each corner of his living room with the crossing of her arms, as if a critique meticulously rules on every aspect of it. From the structure of its walls, design of selected artworks, to the bookshelves, until a pit stop to his window glass. Giving the answers of her opinions. “Hm. Not bad.”

“Of course! Why would it be?”

Just to hear the boasting remark of the owner who seems good to go, after buttoning a last button from his coat sleeves. Too late to regret her compliments. “So a Jang Taeyoung knows to read somehow, huh?” her motioning to the pile of books in a way. “Uh. That? Nah. Just for display purposes. You don’t have to fall in love. Are you?”

That she had to rolled her eyes with his nonsense schemes. “Just go, please.” The dullness of her words certainly. “Wow. I was not informed that my penthouse has a new owner, eh?” thus, his sarcasm came in. “Big word, as if you’re not doing it well with my apartment.”

Satisfied by the raising of his arms of surrendering. “Fine, I lost. Jeez you, woman. You really have your way of words I can’t seem to defeat.” As he starts to push the up icon of his private elevator, with a freehand in its pockets. “Bye! I shall return. Don’t worry, I won’t take long. Be good to my penthouse. Alright, Love?”

As much as she hurries to protest by his last word, she’s too late anyway for the doors of the elevator already closed with the sly winking man inside it. That she only walks back with a frustrating shaking head. Not long enough after remembering her little disappointment a while ago, unconsciously turning her head to the closed elevator again.

“He looks better with a hair down, tho--- Aish! Am I really thinking about that? Urgh.”

Her reproaches to herself definitely, after shaking her head again as she chooses to continue exploring his penthouse anyway while waiting for the room service to arrive. Later on take a minute before it finally came, that she can even decipher the discerning eyes of the service crew as if implying something she surely know. “If you’re done, you’re good to go.” A superiority coldness from her words indeed, just enough to scare an already nervous crew, which she did not fail to give an intimidating look the moment it went out.

“Mierda! So, I had to suffer for misjudgment now? Great. Just great.”

Her last complains definitely, before settling to the food served for her. And when she’s in the middle of biting the last variant of fruits, a small opening from somewhere caught her attention that she even takes its saucer and fork with her as she steps into it. Just to be astonished upon learning what’s through it.

A better view of the mesmerizing sky and busy streets of the city. That she wished she could see during the night. Capturing every futuristic structures. Not when her eyes landed to its indoor pool situated on the center though. That she intuitively frowns with the thoughts of him bringing different b*tches for his satisfaction. Thus, without any second thoughts, she swiftly avoids her gaze to it, not liking to feed her thoughts with much scandalous one. Thankful for her eyes to find a much intriguing view. As she decides to put off the saucer and fork on to a wooden deck chair just beside her. Walking her steps towards a wall to later take off the satin cloth covered on it.

A pastel portrait of Jang Taeyoung that is too good to be one. For she almost considered it a photo. Clasping her hands to her back as she somehow studied the intricate wave of lines of it that she began to get curious of its texture and was about to touch it.

“Loving your view?”

Only to be cut by the devil who’s obviously just came back from his agenda. That she had to turn her back to the portrait and unwillingly face the latter who had just use her fork to pick a fruit from her saucer on the wooden deck chair. “Not really.” Chooses to slip her disapproval by his actions, instead, and just better entertain his questions. “Why?” his itching question while she tends to point to her back, again.

“Well, did this man tell you how I’ve been discriminated by a service crew as if I’m one of your bicha, huh? Cabrón?”

Only to accused the innocent portrait indeed. Leaving him in awe somehow. “See? That’s the result of your everyday refusal with my invites. They could have been familiar to you by now if you at least agree just once.” That she only gives in a rejecting snort. “No thanks still, Mr. Jang.”

“Oh, come on. Again?”

“Since I can tell how many b*tches you already brought and claim with this dirty pool of yours. And you still expect me to come?”

Pouting with the thought truly, as he even gazed his eyes to the thing. “Well I can’t argue with that, though. Do you want me to move out, then?” that confusions crept her. “Eh? And what does it have to do with me? Do what you want, why need my permission, Loco. You have money enough to waste.”

That the only thing he could do is snap in the air. “Right. What am I expecting even? Tss. Here, at least.” That’s where she noticed two paper bags in his hands as he offers one to her. Somehow understood her questioning gaze onto it that he seemed oblige to answer in some way. “Your cloth from yesterday. I handed it to the laundry last night. In case you want to retrieve it?”

Just a reason for her sudden irritation in a way. “Trash that. I can only remember what the coño kid did to me. Urgh.” Thus a satisfying smirk paved his way. “I knew it. A new one it is.” Him, swapping it with the other one then, as she seems contented by his guts. “Thank you.” Accepting the offer indeed by means of her starting walking ahead of him to finally change. Remembering something she almost forgot to ask. “Right. By any chance. Did you manage to---“

“Don’t worry. We already solved the mess, Ms. Sung.”

Cut by her words obviously, but somehow relieve by his answer. “Good. I thought I---“

“Almost forgot to remind you as well that the next time you wear revealing clothes, don’t expect me to be a good boy. Understand, hm? Love?”

Had to gasp an unexpected certainly, for she did not expect his sudden move, hugging her from behind as soon as she went out of the changing room. In means of feeling his rubbing thumb on the navel part of her body. Worst when he leans to kiss the back of her earlobe, that she had to grip to his hold for a while as support to her unravel stance and close her eyes like it’s the best sensation she ever had, to later silently curse herself with the thought. If this is the aftermath of her influence, then screwed up! She really hated it totally. By means she had to fight it in any way. With a gritting teeth and stern look, she succeeded surely.

“Get your hold out of me before you meet your destiny behind bars, Jang Taeyo---“

“Want to take revenge with the dimwit somehow? I can be a help though.”

The supposed to be frustration from cutting her words only replaced by a tempting welcome from the offer he suggested. “How?” too late to regret her move of turning her head to face him, as she forgot they were still close to each other. Opposite to how he desirably stares to her lips. Meeting his sly expression again. “Now, you’re all ears.” His only remark before miraculously just let go of her without urging for teases like he always do. Except for the smirk, maybe. Thank God still, as the thought of punishing someone excites her for no reason.

#kim soo hyun #seo ye ji #seo yea ji #psycho but it's okay #itsokaynottobeokay #its okay not to be okay #moon gang tae #ko mun yeong #korean actor #korean actress #realkoreanmovie #real #hyunji #hyunjicouple #sung eun young #jang tae young #jangtaeyeong #by quantum physics #quantum physics

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datastate · 3 years

Note

im basic but like,, hk for the ask game please?

you’re fine! thank you :]

favorite character:

objectively? probably quirrel! i love how his story and ghost’s intertwine, and the scenes with him throughout the game on your first playthrough really do add a lot more. hollow knight does such a good job mixing both game and story elements; you can tell in his first interaction that he is going to be an important person simply based on his location, and it becomes so much clearer later on as well. the scene w monomon... literally made me go “hold on a second man. hold on a second.” because... pain <3 love it tho

second favorite character:

hornet!!! her whole deal makes me SO sad. herrah gave her life for hornet, thinking that even after she was gone that the most duty hornet would carry would be ruling deepnest, but instead hornet has to take on both of her parents’ mantles and she doesn’t take it lightly. herrah’s sacrifice was for nothing, but hornet still acknowledges that her intentions were good. the realization that hornet is herrah’s child is just. gd. it hurts me. you go into herrah’s dreamnail dialogue saying “for her,” and then hornet saying she doesn’t blame herrah for leaving her..... idk. i have a lot of thoughts between hornet’s situation + herrah’s intention and how they think of each other now, but i am not articulate rn ahbvsmdg it just hurts me

least favorite character:

willoh scares me

no but really moss prophet can go fuck themself boo i hate that clown you had it coming you’re like every christian preacher i’ve ever met. you’re literally soul master before he went on that killing spree

the character i’m most like:

laughs nervously in thk

favorite pairing:

ZE’MER AND THE TRAITORS’ DAUGHTER... i know we have almost nothing on them in-game that isn’t fucking depressing bc ze’mer’s been reduced to the grey mourner, but just. they’re a really big comfort for me. whenever i see art or writing of them, i just

also sheo / the nailsmith... happy couple indeed. ik these r just the canon gay pairings but it’s still. it’s really nice having that rep and it’s done well!!!! considering that most of hallownest has gone to hell ahbvsmdgs

ALSO also. and ik i’m just listing all the canon couples at this point, but i love iselda/cornifer... the potential in their stories?? iselda’s wanting to travel w cornifer again. idk. ijust. <3 and i have ideas on how they met w cornifer being THE smartest dumbass and her being genuinely experienced. i love these two so much. they r my mom n dad

least favorite pairing (other than usual condemnable shit):

can we all agree grimm/pk is weird as hell. you literally got a “i only tend to dead / dying kingdoms, putting them to rest so something new will be able to grow in its place” while pk is like “if i don’t craft / unite a kingdom from nothing i WILL die. again.” i get they’re ‘opposites’ and they’ve both got the rebirth thing going on, but like... c’mon... their ideals directly contradict each other and neither one is gonna change anytime soon, it can’t even be enemies to lovers.

favorite moment:

seeing hornet after killing herrah.

rating: 10/10!!! one of, if not THE, best games i’ve played in years

#hk posting #ask #Anonymous #long post

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mousehole5000 · 3 years

Text

more tgcf chapters 143-173 lets goooooo

PEI MING BOO HISS except actually okay he’s mostly funny i think but still boo hiss

“hey who’s this guy who’s really pissed at you?” “oh thats my sword. i broke it.” alright then!

i think i need to go back and reread the banyue pass arc bc im still confused as to whats going on with banyue and pei su

“Banyue dropped from the sky with two pots raised. Without a word, she plummeted with the mouths of the pots facing down, trapping and detaining the shocked Ming’guang and the roaring Ke Mo within.” - THATS MY GIRL

“It must be known that, to heavenly officials, it certainly was more than natural for kingdoms of the mortal realm to fight and annihilate one another; the acts of these plays progressing on endlessly. But when it came their own turn, it was often hard to let things go. If one must stand in the same court as the one who annihilated their own kingdom, and that man cavorted in the heavens, exceedingly flashy, then it must be vexing.” - hmmmm!!

“I’ve spoken too many words in this lifetime. What are you referring to?” - okay to be fair thats a mood

okay its nice to get some pei ming backstory and its funny that he and xie lian are bonding but also still whenever pei ming interacts with a female character my hackles rise like a cat lol

“Xie Lian watched as Banyue thought really hard before cheerfully pulling out a few long, wine-red scorpion-snakes, and putting them into the bubbling pot.” - THATS MY GIRL

“Although “smell” was something colourless and formless, the instant Banyue removed the pot cover, it was as if some mysterious physical object had twisted all the air around the mouth of that pot. The group stared at the sight within the pot for a long time. Their pupils reflected an endless, bottomless darkness; like it could pull them into the abyss. No words could describe the sentiment expressed within their eyes. A moment later, Xie Lian patted Banyue’s shoulder and gave a thumbs-up.” - like father-figure like daughter-figure. amazing.

“However, what if one day mortals discovered something completely new that ran faster than horses? Then, when this new invention overtook horses, worshippers of this heavenly official who controlled horses would inevitably decrease. Such heavenly officials, flashing by like shooting stars, made up the majority of the heavens.” - obsessed with this, genuinely. life and change. worship and its purpose. my religious studies diploma on my wall is screaming at me rn. ALSO i am once again thinking about celebrities

“...” It was only then that Pei Ming seemed to notice, and started to contemplate this question. A moment later, he answered, “A habit. In a dark, creepy place like this, isn’t it normal to hold women in your arms, to comfort them and calm their fears?” “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t scared,” Banyue said.” - BANYUE I LOVE YOU. I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. god this takes me back to every college party i ever went to

LING WEN BACKSTORY????? shoeseller chosen for godhood bc she wrote a political essay and got arrested...... and now she’s face to face with the official who appointed her..... do go on.....

“Ling Wen laughed out loud, seeming to be enraged, and her voice dropped. “Very well! You said I couldn’t reach that high. Then, might I ask you: had the prominence of the Palace of Jing Wen at its peak ever reached even the knees of my Palace of Ling Wen??” - GET HIM!!!! BOO HISS JING WEN

“Compared to you, I’m not that bad,” Ling Wen said. “You’d personally order me to stay in the Palace of Jing Wen until midnight, then turn around and say I shamelessly hang around ‘til late to harass you. Words murder without form; I was much nicer responding with blatant violence.” - ling wen im love you..... also this bit... feels Real

BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN!! FLOWER PETALS TRANSFORMATION!!! see hua cheng? look as how cool it can be when you leave the story for a little while!! bc then you get to return and make an entrance!!

“Not only can you bring forth bloody rain, you can also make flowers shower. I didn’t know that. How fun!” - cute!! and in that moment we were all xie lian

“Everyone was stunned by his deed, and Ling Wen arduously gave him a thumbs-up. ”Ol’ Pei, what a man!” Pei Ming gritted his teeth. “WELCOME!” - aww three two tumors buddies!!

okay yin yu is here and xie lian did the equivalent of asking someone when the baby is due only to find out theyre not pregnant at all. then rong guang taunts yin yu and no one says anything. i do love the amount of awkward moments in this book tbh sometimes there are no words.

“All around was sand and mud crushing at him, exceedingly suffocating. The sand and mud was also moving endlessly; the feeling was like he was swallowed into the stomach of a giant monster, and that monster had also eaten a bunch of other things besides him, tumbling everything in its stomach, trying to digest” - ooooh creepy!!! the red string thing... is cute.... also xie lian being able to see hua cheng’s butterfly vision by looking directly into his eye is kinda cool. and obviously homoerotic.

“Are lower-ranked heavenly officials below other people?” Quan Yizhen asked. “No,” Yin Yu replied. Were they not? It was obvious that he himself didn’t believe in his own words, and Quan Yizhen also noticed. A good while later, he said bluntly, “I don’t like it here.” Yin Yu said nothing.” - im having emotions. and then yin yu also saying he doesnt like it there either.... also idk how this scene is going to play out but as much as im enjoying quan yizhen being an icon i can also possibly see how yin yu could eventually get to the point of “i am tired of being nice. i do just want to go apeshit” even if he really cares about qyz. it happens </3

“Indeed,” Hua Cheng said. “Half a year later when Quan Yizhen actually ascends, he won’t find it so funny anymore.” “Can we watch that part too?” Xie Lian asked. “We can. Hold on,” Hua Cheng replied.” - quan yizhen king of taking things literally. also why did this turn into hualian having a movie night

jian yu seems like the kind of asshole who would purposely give someone regular soda when they specifically asked for diet soda. god yin yu is really having a bad day i really feel for him in the whole situation with the brocade immortal

awww okay at least jian yu tried to take responsibility. im still mad at him tho that was objectively a terrible idea. god this whole situation sucked :(

“Rocks and earth crushed at them from all around, forcing their bodies to press tightly against one another, their faces brushing, their ears warm. Although it wasn’t the right time, a thought flashed through Xie Lian’s mind: “‘To die buried together’ doesn’t feel so bad.” - okay... im kind of emotional.... gay people....

okay obviously these murals and the prince of wuyong have some connection (im guessing pretty direct) to xie lian and are important but everytime they start analyzing one i feel like im back in art history class fhadskfhskjdhf not that thats a bad thing!! i liked art history a lot tbh

“Don’t worry, they’re not human,” Hua Cheng said. “It’s precisely because they’re not human that we have to worry, alright….” Xie Lian thought.” - goth ghost bf problems

xie lian: well, there is one person i trust more than anyone else, someone who’s first in my mind hua cheng, oblivious: oh :/ xie lian, also oblivious: what? hua cheng: you shouldnt trust so easily its dangerous xie lian: oh. haha. yeah. well. wanna,,, know who it is? hua cheng: its :) fine :) it :) doesnt :) matter :) but of course you can tell me if you want to gege xie lian, internally: well now ive made it weird hua cheng, 5 minutes later: actually i need you to tell me. right now. its totally for your security me: gay people smh

“As they suspected, he had been captured by Qi Rong. Although no one was bound by ropes, there were balls of greasily green ghost fires hovering over every one of their heads.” - completely off track but anybody else remember the great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts song

“Could there actually come a day when Qi Rong was embarrassed that someone might see the manner in which he ate? Before Xuan Ji entered, she put Guzi down. Guzi, ta-ta-ta, ran in, rushing straight to Qi Rong’s side. But when he saw him, he pointed his finger. He cried, “Dad is eating bad things in secret again!” “I’m not!” Qi Rong retaliated.” SCREAM IS QI RONG LEARNING THE POWER OF LOVE NOOOO also god that poor man whose body he has im starting to doubt if he’ll ever be free jimmy novak flashbacks

everytime we get another ghost king power somewhere someone should be writing hua cheng the cyborg bf in a high tech futuristic au i think thats the only other potential setting that could truly capture this wild ride

“In truth, throughout history, there was no man in the world who didn’t love bragging. A breeze could blow the handkerchief of a brothel girl into a man’s hand, and he would turn around and say the most beautiful of renowned escorts had fallen in love with him; holding shoes and wiping benches for the emperor’s mistress’s uncle’s grandson’s cousin’s mistress would for sure become him being an important administrator at the residence of royal relatives, raising his status. Thus, men who didn’t brag were a rare species.” - SCREAM this is going in my favorite tgcf quotes folder god... mxtx come here let me shake your hand

read the story of rain master yushi huang’s ascension. why am i crying. also this bit im crying again me with my stuffed animals “Thus, while Yushi Huang was cultivating at the Temple of Yulong, every time when she went to seek water and passed that door, she would rub the head of that ox. The door knocker soaked in her essence of life, and when the Rain Master ascended, the ox ascended with her.”

okay thats enough for now i have 7 more chapters to book 4!!! woo!!!

#tgcf liveblog #bedtime now but im excited to be moving on #mouse mumbles

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24hour-blues · 3 years

Note

all the ones you haven't answered yet? i'm sorry you're sad💙

thank you, that's very sweet. i hope you're doing alright 💛

1. when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? - more milk. i always end up putting too much.

2. do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? - yes

3. what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? - library receipts, post-its, junk mail, pencils

5. are you self-conscious of your smile? - i think it’s one of the few things i’m not self-conscious about, actually. i like my smile.

8. what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? - writing, often poetry but sometimes prose. i like creating playlists, too, and singing.

9. do you like singing/humming to yourself? - yeah, i sing to myself all the time. whatever song i have stuck in my head at the moment.

10. do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? - side, but very occasionally my stomach.

12. what’s your favorite planet? - jupiter

14. if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? - lots of pillows and blankets of all types. succulents and cacti on the windowsills. wooden utensils and dark cabinets in the kitchen. a breakfast bar with stools that don’t match. rugs with funky patterns. a big, soft couch in a bright color that you can sink into. a small balcony with fold-out chairs. rows of mugs and barely any plates. the bathroom crowded with makeup and skin products, writing on the mirror in blue marker. beds never made. a guitar in the corner of the sitting room.

15. go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! - there are more trees on earth than stars in the milky way

16. what’s your favorite pasta dish? - angel hair pasta with puttanesca sauce

18. tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. - i can’t think of anything...

19. do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? - everything. sometimes it’s big things, sometimes small. my fears and what i’m in love with. regrets. shame. hope.

20. what’s your favorite eye color? - grey

21. talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. - idk if it’s really my favorite, but my current backpack took me all through college and it’s good for storing stuff or using as an overnight bag. it’s from timberland and is a nice earthy brown with a flap over the top. lots of pockets.

22. are you a morning person? - i can be

23. what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? - make breakfast and tea. read or watch a movie that makes me rethink everything

25. what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? - a school, i think?

26. what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? - i haven’t had them forever, but i wear my doc martens with everything. i used to wear plain white keds with everything.

27. what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? - winter green

28. sunrise or sunset? - sunrise

30. think of it: have you ever been truly scared? - yes

31. what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. - i like soft, fluffy socks and ones with fun patterns. i love hiking socks. i don’t wear them to sleep tho.

32. tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. - i went to a waffle house at 5am with a friend and some friends of hers i’d just met on her birthday. we were all really drunk, the food took forever, and it tasted awful, but we were happy and laughing.

33. what’s your fave pastry? - probably a cinnamon roll

35. do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? - i like a good calligraphy pen and new notebooks. i don’t use them often; i feel like i don’t have anything important enough to write.

37. do you like keeping your room messy or clean? - it’s usually clean unless i’m not feeling well. sometimes i get disorganized.

38. tell us about your pet peeves! - overlapping conversations. people interrupting others. loud mouth noises, like chewing or licking. people criticizing my driving. nitpicky comments on my clothes or how i look. being talked about.

39. what color do you wear the most? - black, probably.

41. what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? - how it feels to float by helena fox

42. do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! - nope

43. who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? - i’m not sure

44. when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? - i can’t remember

45. do you trust your instincts a lot? - not really

46. tell us the worst pun you can think of. - i can’t remember it but something about pigeons and being coo-l

47. what food do you think should be banned from the universe? - bacon. i just wanna make people angry.

48. what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? - my dad told me a story once, about when i was a kid. he said that he and i were walking together near the lake in the neighborhood across from mine. i was holding his hand, and i said to him that this was the happiest time in my life because i wouldn't be the same when i grew out of being a child. i think i have the same fear now--that i'll never be that happy again.

49 do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

- i like records but i only have one. it's an album by ccr. i really like them

50. what’s an odd thing you collect?

- beer bottle caps

52. what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

- maybe those "girl..." text posts that just say stupid shit

53. have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

- watched them all but pulp fiction. i don't really remember heathers at all

55. what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

- lets not talk about that

57. go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

- not in the mood sorry

58. who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? - bri is wine mom. quincy and i are vodka aunt.

60. do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

- yes but i rarely remember favorites. i read so much and feel it then forget all the words

61. what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

- someone gave me a rock once. i get too nervous to give stupid gifts

62. do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

- orange or cranberry

63. are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

- i'm more fussy about music than books, but i do like my books organized. i like them worn in and well-read tho, not in perfect shape.

64. what color is the sky where you are right now?

- a fuzzy, light blue-grey. it's snowing

65. is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

- a few

66. what would your ideal flower crown look like?

- lots of green leaves in all different shapes and sizes. tiny white and blue flowers.

67. how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

- isolated and insignificant. safe

68. what’s winter like where you live?

- cold, grey, snowy.

69. what are your favorite board games?

- idk if i really too many board games. maybe cranium. i like puzzles more

71. what’s your favorite kind of tea?

- honey vanilla chamomile

72. are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

- yea and even then i forget.

73. what are some of your worst habits?

- i give up too easily

74. describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

- excitable. emotional. so very smart. creative as all hell. self-conscious where they shouldn't be. never runs out of words in the best way. loves to share.

75. tell us about your pets!

- my dog shiver is turning into a little old man, but he still acts like a puppy. he likes attention and whines to communicate. he'll greet you at the door and put his front paws on your thighs to say hi. follows you all around the house. loves to cuddle.

- my pigeon spirit is young and vocal. she coos for attention. when i go to sleep, she grunts every time i move to ask where i am and if i'm okay. i take showers with her and sit on the tile; she puffs up right into my side and sticks her wings out for me to splash water on her. she likes to be close to me to get neck scritches and push her head into my neck and preen every bit of me she can.

76. is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

- a lot probably

77. pink or yellow lemonade?

- limeade

78. are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

- i dunno they're cute

80. what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

- it's white wallpaper with pink roses along the top and ribbons of pink and green striped vertically. my mom chose it before i was born.

81. describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

- they sort of remind me of dark water where everything is reflected back in it--not just the sky but the trees and people walking--and they make you want to look closer because you know there's something in there, it's not just a reflection, like flat glass. but it's hidden until you dio your hand in the pictures broken.

82. are/were you good in school?

- pretty good

83. what’s some of your favorite album art?

- i don't look at albums

85. do you read comics? what are your faves?

- not really, but watchmen is one of my favorites.

86. do you like concept albums? which ones?

- dunno

88. are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

- um. idrk. i like whatever monet was doing.

91. where do you plan on traveling this year?

- maybe michigan

92. are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

- i like cheese

93. what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

- i just kind of. let it do whatever.

94. who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

- my uncle

95. what are your plans for this weekend?

- honestly have no clue

96. do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

- put them off until windows tells me it's restarting the computer in five minutes

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

- mb

98. when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

- in college with jacob, although i wouldn't really call it joking. we just walked through a state park. it was beautiful.

100. if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

- idk. i feel like i'd make the same mistakes if i went back, but the future scares me.

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celawrites · 4 years

Text

Day 37

It’s 12am and my phone is buzzing and I cannot sleep. What the fuck is going on.

You have 20 new notifications

I click open our class chat first, and to my surprise, it’s all birthday messages.

Clown: Did you guys actually have to type me a whole essay? Thank you tho <3

Pebble: A well written essay!

Sam: Time well spent

My phone vibrates and I’m invited to a call from a handful of friends.

Joining Your Neighborhood Pizza delivery service’s call…

“It’s 12am let me sleep”

“Are you not happy that we’re wishing you happy birthday at 12am?”

“I am, it’s just I’m also exhausted for no reason”

“You’re going out for a McDonalds run right?”

“Yeah. You guys woke me up halfway through”

“Sorry”

“I’m sorry it’s 12am and I really wanna know who’s in this call right now”

“Ah! It would be Estelle, Beanie, Min, “

“Your son”

“Mint”

“Sun”

“What the fuck are you guys doing awake?”

“Admiring the stars”

“Sure. Totally believe you”

“Cressie it’s your birthday.”

“One year closer to my demise I guess”

“You’re insane”

“So I’ve been told”

“Ah. Check your mailbox in the morning! There should be a couple things in there”

I yawn. 6 hours of sleep isn’t enough to run on.

“Alright get to bed. Sleep your last 3 hours and I’ll be waiting for you at 3am”

“Mint you’re the most punctual out of all of us why are you picking me up?”

“I’ve never had a McDonalds run with you. Besides, It’s Friday.”

“Alright I’m sleeping now good night”

“Good night birthday girl!”

“That’s so cheesy ksjdfalfa”

Sure enough, at 3am, I wake up and find Mint outside my door, vibing in his car. I shake my head and lock the door.

“Good morning Mint”

“Morning”

“You’re mean you know that?”

“Happy birthday Mint”

“Right back at you”

“HEY REMEMBER WHEN YOU JUST STRAIGHT UP LEFT ME ON READ WHEN I WISHED YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY-”

“I THOUGHT WE WERE OVER THAT ALREAY”

“My salty ass could never”

“Alright what do you want for your birthday?”

“Neither of us give anything-”

“Our Asian ass could never”

“HOnestly”

“Ah. I do have a present for you though”

My hand reaches into my backpack and I pull out a scrapbook.

“In true Crescent fashion, I present to you our scrapbook”

“What?”

“A collection of all the photos we have together with little commentary along the way. This is now yours” I beam.

“You’re joking”

“Nope”

“I didn’t even get you anything like his I-”

“You don’t need to”

He snickers and hands me a small box.

“I found it while shopping online, and it reminded me of that one time A gave you a rainbow rose so I figured I would give you an eternal one”

I stare at the rose. It’s rainbow, and I was surprised he even remembered that his brother had given me one. I tear up slightly, maybe its because I wasn’t used to getting gifts from him, or the sudden change of heart but I mean-

“I’m crying”

“You’re always crying”

“SHUT UP KDFSKFSHDJF”

My hands clink at the glass softly, and Mint hums in appreciation as he flips through the scrapbook.

“Where’s this photo from?”

“Hm?” He points at a photo where both he and his brother are jumping on the trampoline while I’m sitting.

“Your mom sent it to my mom a few years back”

“Ah”

There’s a comfortable silence that passes over us, and I decide to answer all the texts that I had received about my birthday while he flipped through the book.

After about a dozen thank you!’s and 4 conversations, I finish. Mint snickers when he flips to the last page.

“You just had to put that one last huh?”

On the last page lies Mint and I at Junior prom last year. It was a tradition to go with eachother, and my friend had taken a photo where we were pretending to make out.

”Why? Don’t want your future wife seeing it?”

“No. It’s just you saved the best for last” he snorts.

“Of course” I hum.

“Alright what do you want from McDonalds?”

“Ice cream”

“You’re literally bleeding this week no”

“Uhhh. Fries?”

“Sure”

Mint starts his car and we head off. The sky is a calm blue. A dark shade that leaves you wondering if there’s more out there. It was ironic that I had met him so long ago. It was even more surprising when he moved here for junior and senior year. I was horribly confused, and the only explanation he could muster out was a job change for his parents. But I was pretty sure they just wanted to have A mature in a different environment.

“Lost in thought again?”

“Mhm. You never told me how and why you moved here in detail”

“Nothing really. It was a job change on my parents part, and a new path for A”

“What about you?”

“I wanted to chase the only person who never gave up on me”

“You’re disgusting”

“Better than confessing to my crush every day for a whole year”

“LEAVE ME ALONE”

“You’re the one who brought up how I chased you all the way to California”

“I still wonder how you can pin after someone like me”

“At some point I realized you saw me as a brother”

“I wish I could do that.”

“You’re a hopeless romantic. Have some fun every once in a while”

“Are you implying I should have a one night stand?”

“Once you’re a legal adult sure”

“Bad decision making except it’s Mint giving me bad advice as a joke”

“I hate you”

“Love you too~”

“You’re disgusting”

“Bleh”

HE pulls up at the McDonalds drive-through and I scream.

“dEAR ARE YOU ALIVE?”

“OMG HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING! EVERYTHING’S ON ME TODAY”

“WTF DEAR NO”

“NO OBJECTIONS. IS MINT WITH YOU?”

“I’m here”

“Happy birthday Mint darling anyways what do you guys want?”

“The usual”

“Nothing new?”

“Nope”

“Alright! See you at the second window!”

“Cressie darling I got you a gift!”

“I- what?”

“Gift.” He tosses something through the car window and it lands in my hands.

“What is it?”

“Check”

I click open the box and I find a small pendant with a moon.

“I thought you were a broke high school student?”

“But the boss gave me a raise and told me to get something nice for my lover and like I don’t have one so I mean-”

“I don’t deserve you” I sniff.

“Stop crying darling you’re scaring me”

I really hope you find yourself a lover this year or I will fight everyone around me I SWEAR”

“You’re being too loud again Cress”

“Sorry”

He hands us our food and waves us goodbye. It was funny to me. I had so many friends around me now that I had grown.

“Are you gonna make a birthday post?”

“Oh for Serenity!” I gasp.

I type away and Mint steals a couple fries from me. I hiss at him while typing.

“Too bad” he shrugs.

School rolls around and I ‘m met with 20 happy birthdays and a couple gifts fro my other friends. Surprise surprise I have other friends. Z and Sun’s gift surprises me the most.

“Cress” Sun calls for me after school.

“Hm?”

“Happy birthday” He hands a medium-sized box to me.

“You always make us scrapbooks for our birthdays so I thought I’d try to make one for you”

“Have I ever told you how much I love you-”

“You remind me pretty often but yeah”

I open the box and a seat little scrapbook sits inside. There’s a white pen, a silver one, and a gold pen rolling around next to it, and there’s a small letter. Z tackles me from behind and I crash into Sun’s chest.

“Z what the f-”

“Language” Sun glares.

“Your gift!” Z hands me a small photo sized box.

“Photos?”

“You made a whole batch with notes on the back for me so I decided to print a bunch for you!”

“Thank you Z” I sniff slightly.

“What’s wrong! Do you not like it?”

“No no! I’m emotional haha” I muster up a smile. My cursed birthday luck was gonna catch up with me soon. I just felt it.

“No worries! It was the least I could do” Z smiles.

I nod in response. The rest of the day carries out like normal, and I find myself tired by the end of the day. My classmates threw me a party, and at the end of the day, my friends threw me another one. I enjoyed it, but I was waiting for my cursed birthday luck to catch up to me, I could never be happy until it occurred.

“If you’re thinking about that birthday curse of yours again, I’d advise you to know that with me, there’s no chance of having bad birthday luck” Mint hums. His birthdays had no bad things. It was like the universe favored him.

“I know. But I can’t truly calm down until I get to bed”

There’s a comfortable silence that settles down before Mint speaks up again.

“I’m sorry”

“Why so?”

“You had always wished me happy birthday so consistently, and I never replied and I just feel really bad and all-”

“Don’t worry about it.” I tap at the red solo cup in my hand. “I probably deserved all that”

“You don’t and that’s why I kind of. Um”

“Mint you’re my editor what did you do-”

“Bought tickets back home?” I gape at him. My jaw is dropped, and he seems to panic. “My home’s open and all! I know your house is rented out and the renters for my place just moved out and we have thanksgiving in a month so I figured I would take you back for the break and I’m sorry! I probably should’ve asked first and all but-”

A choked sob escapes my lips. I’m shocked, I hadn’t gone home in so long. How did he know? A stream of incoherent words escapes my lips and Mint tries to soothe me.

“You know.” I managed to force it out. “Some days I question why I stopped crushing on you. You spoil me rotten, and I don’t even deserve someone who cares for me and knows me like you and you always seem to know how I’m feeling and-”

Mint rubs soft circles on my back, and I let out my emotions. My birthday curse wasn’t a curse. It was a tradition. A tradition to cry at least once on my birthday, and for the first time, I was crying tears of joy. A couple minutes pass, and I feel my emotions slowly draw back.

“Thank you” I mumbled weakly.

Serenity made a new post!

It’s my birthday! Thank you to all of you who sent in birthday wishes (and death threats)! Another year has passed and I truly wish that I could thank you all face to face for the support!

Once again, my lovely editor Leaf shares a birthday with me so go ahead and send in some birthday wishes to him as well. For today’s gift from me, you all get a blast of joy! Much love!

-Serenity

Previous : Masterlist : Next

#writing #people crying inadfs #first person #birthdays #fiction #365 days #365 days of writing #365 days of rejection #though not much rejection anymore #project #quarantine project #me being emotionally unstable again

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writinginthesparetime · 4 years

Text

A place far away pt6

pairing: actor!Park Haejin x student!reader

Warnings: famous!au ; college!au ; litte bit of swearing?

genre: fluff ; angst

chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 7

(If needed I will add more warnings and upload the genre tags in next chapters)

Summary:

So that’s how all started.

It was a rainy day in Seoul and I was the new girl in town. Precisely the new girl in college, just moved from europe to study abroad.

How could i ever imagine?

A/n: I really tried to be faster on writing but I ended up just procrastinating for two more days. I really hope tho, that you’ll enjoy this chapter since I think this story is getting juicer!!

————————————————

“Is it his?” Hae-jin didn’t stop looking at Jackson who was slowly going down a few stairs.

“It is.”

Well, I have already made the mistake.

Hae-jin and Jackson both frowning looked at me confused. Jackson came closer, standing by my side.

“Yes, y/n-nie doesn’t smoke.” These were the only words he said. But everything about him suddenly changed: it felt like he was chasing something. His dark gaze, his straight posture made me shiver. He quickly took his stuff from my hands.

I felt like a was a prey. I was so short between two tall men. The palpable tension.

I looked again at Hae-jin who was watching my friend with an eyebrow raised. “Y/n-nie?” He repeated, softly.

And suddenly I understood his gaze. This was the confirmation of his doubt. Jackson nodded, smirking.

Oh no.

Hae-jin gave a hint of a bitter smile and took a step behind.

One of the two contents stopped fighting.

“Well y/n, I’m sorry for bothering you.” He finally looked at me with sad eyes. “Evidently there were many misunderstanding.”

Sad voice but sharp words. He was clearly offended. Hae-jin took another step behind and made a quick bow. He then walked away to his colleagues.

“Wha-“

What was going on?

He was walking quickly and confidently, gravity manner.

“Tsk. Who was that?”

I batted my eyelashes, confused at what just happened. I couldn’t let him go away thinking that ...

I wasn’t able to say a word to him.

I had to do so something.

Now.

Y/n, like right now.

“Hae-jin!” I scream, while bringing my hands closer to my mouth. This time the volume of my voice was even too loud, indeed many people turned around. Hae-jin stopped too.

“Wait.” I said softly. I wasn’t even able to take a step that Jackson grabbed my arm, stopping me.

“Y/n, Who’s that man?”

I turned slowly, my face expressing my pure anger probably scared him because I was able to get free from his grip easily.

“Jackson you already did enough.”

And then I saw Hae-jin, more and more disappointed and maybe even angry. He definitely couldn’t stand how Jackson and I were close.

I run after him hoping we could walk a little side by side, giving me the time to explain myself. Walking side by side as we did the first time, as we actually met.

“Wait. It’s my fault, I’m not good at this.” Hae-jin didn’t even looked at me, he just kept walking.

“You’re good with misunderstanding.” He said with gritted teeth and squinty eyes.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean ... the last time we met you didn’t give me time to actually speak.” He stopped just to give me a quick cold glance. “And now, I don’t feel like needing your explanations.”

“Hae-jin, wait please, I know this could sound so weird but-“

He cut my words off. “Y/n, he’s waiting for you.”

“But-“

“It’s been a long day for me.” He sighed and directed his sad gaze to me. His words were calm now and his face didn’t looked angry at all.

“But, you should know, him an-“

“Enough. Maybe it’s better this way.”

And I knew that trying to talk now would only make the situation even worse. His behaviour before confident, became almost peaceful. He gave me a smile again. Fast and bitter.

“Y/n ...” He bowed at me and left, resigned.

What a big mistake I made.

And I didn’t know how to erase it.

I could only watch him going away.

“Y/n-nie! Can you tell me what’s going on please?” Nana followed me outside the karaoke building while I was trying to wear my coat, and with determined stride I just wanted to leave.

“I ruined everything. As if there was actually anything, between us. I fucking ruined everything.”

“With Jackson?” She asked exiting the building too. She started shivering at the cold air outside.

“With him ... That’s not about him, even if He didn’t help me at all. I am talking about the mysterious man.”

“The mysterious man?”

“I met him a few minutes ago, right here, outside. And I ruined everything.”

Nana grabbed my arm to stop me and turn me around to face her.

“Y/n, fuck. Calm down. Breath. What happened?”

“I’ll be brief, he thinks I’m in a relationship with Jackson, or something like this.”

“And you didn’t tell him otherwise?”

“I tried but he looked so disappointed and the last time we met I was the one who ...”

And I realised, under a red street light, I never told Nana the whole story. I always omitted some details, more or less important, to protect me.

“The last time you met you were the one ... ?” She repeated, curious.

“I’m going to tell you everything now, the whole story, detailed.”

She smiled at me comfortably while I started telling everything again.

I began with that night, the meeting in the little supermarket, finally able to tell her I always knew his name. And then how we met at school in the library, that beautiful girl and me running away, scared he could be taken. And lastly tonight. I even made the effort to repeat every single word we said, hoping it could be easier then for Nana to help me.

Once I finished, we were already in our apartment building.

“Would you like some tea?” She asked already filling the kettle with water. I nodded.

“I am so sorry. I should have told you sooner, and I should have been honest with you from the beginning.” I said sitting on the sofa.

Once again the shared living room was empty, but we could clearly hear voices in different rooms.

“It doesn’t matter y/n. I don’t think I actually never thought about you opening up with me so much, and I didn’t want to force you.” She comforted me. She laid on the kitchen counter. “But now you can’t hide that you have a crush on him.”

“Ohh.” I said hiding my face behind my hands, embarrassed.

“Well, if it wasn’t the case, you would have never called him tonight, neither tried to explain the situation.” The kettle started whistling behind her.

“But I don’t understand if he ... well, if he likes me.” I looked at her, my eyes full with hope, maybe she had the answers to my questions.

“I don’t know y/n, he had weird and different behaviours. Strangely you met many times. But if at the beginning I thought that he was really into you, like he would walk in the neighbourhood hoping to bump into you, tonight we had the proof he’s just working around here.”

“So it’s just ... coincidences?”

“Wait.” She filled two cups with hot water, grabbed both and placed them on the coffee table in front of me. She handed me some tea bags and sat next on the sofa.

“Anyways, He has always tried to talk to you and he has always been kind. He looked interested in you, he asked you about school and hobbies, right?”

“And the girl?” I grabbed the cup, lost in my thoughts.

“Today he talk about misunderstandings, not referring to something specific. Was he talking about that girl the other day? About Jackson? Surely he looked annoyed that you didn’t let him explain himself in the library, so that leads me to think the girl is just a colleague.” Nana was indeed focused.

“Are you sure?” I asked, with an hint of hope.

“No, of course no. I do not have a crystal ball.”

“Ah.” I sinked in the couch.

“Y/n, you have to remember he looked sad when he saw you with Jackson, maybe even hurt to hear how close you two are. At least enough close to hang out a Sunday evening, touching your hands freely and even calling you by a cute nickname. He’s definitely jealous.”

“Jealous?” My shocked reaction amused Nana.

“Oh you’re so naive. Obviously he’s jealous to see you with another man.”

“How can he be jealous? Him? Did you even see him?” I asked, eyes wide open, incredulous that a man so kind and handsome could ever feel jealous about someone else.

“No, actually no.” She said back, and we both giggled.

We sipped our tea quietly, giving each other some time to reflect. I finally felt an heavy weight leaving my chest, just for of being able to actually talk about this.

But now, after being forced to admit to my self that, yes, I do like him, the fear of being rejected was getting bigger.

Nana words were suiting me, a little.

“So his name is Hae-jin? It’s a very common name ...” She looked at me curious. “Did he mention his last name?”

“No. Do you think I have any chance with him?” I asked softly, afraid by the question itself.

“After tonight? I really don’t know. He didn’t really sounded like he wants to talk about this again.” I nodded, this answer dragged me down, to remind me to keep my feet on the ground.

“Objectively I don’t even know why I am struggling so much, I don’t really know him.” I said to myself, cold. “Maybe he’s right, it’s better this way.”

“Well, at least you don’t have to desperately try to forget stuff since you barely know each other. “ We both sipped some tea.

“For a little while, let’s agree about a no-boys rule. They are distracting, mainly from studying, and I really don’t need that.”

I promised myself that, for a little while, I would just be focused on college and studying.

Nana smiled at me. “I’m in.”

On Monday we went to school, feeling fresh and new, as nothing happened.

Or that’s how I lied to myself. I just needed time, that’s perfectly normal.

I was surely more motivated to study, more focused on lectures. Or at least, every time I got distracted I had Nana next to me ready to pinch me.

At the very last class, during a break, She dragged me to the closest coffee machine.

“Why are you running?” I asked following her, while searching for money in my jeans pocket.

“I just desperately need coffee, and I know you do too.” Nana long legs arrived before me and she quickly took two coffee for the both of us. “And while we are going back to class, we need to stop for a minute: Jackson wants to talk to you.”

“Jackson? THAT Jackson?” I asked shocked while putting some sugar on my drink.

“Stop calling him jackson-that-jackson.”

“And you stop setting up dates.” We walked back to the hallway.

“He wants to apologise.”

“Well, he really needs to.” I was still offended by his behaviour extremely protective and extremely unnecessary.

“Y/n, Nana ...” His voice. We both turned, my eyes letting him know how much I despised him. He quickly bowed. “I wanted to apologise for yesterday. I was so rude with y/n and his friend.”

He bowed again, this time for longer. He kept talking. “I am truly sorry, I didn’t want to appear cocky, neither come between the two of you in your relationship. At the beginning, I thought I had a chance with you, y/n, but ...” He straighten up smiling. I was already forgiving him, but his smirk confused me. “ ... you’re into really old men.”

I squeaked, while Jackson started laughing so hard at my reaction.

“You ...” Nana stopped me before I could say or do anything else.

No one noticed our chatting and my reaction so a couple seconds later, after realising the whole situation, the three of us started giggling.

I accepted his apologies, mainly because I didn’t want to feel any resentments towards him.

“Well class, this was the last lecture of the day, it’s a delight to see everyone is working hard.” The professor picked up all the papers on his desk, while the whole class was getting ready too.

“I still have to read you a circular before you leave. I assume you all noticed how some classes are already going beyond their programs, even if it’s a matter of a couple of chapters.”

The class became slowly quiet, everyone keeping attention to his words. Nana gave me a quick glance, frowning.

“This year we decided to allow some students to attend a new kind of practice classes, or let’s say to apply their knowledge in a different way. In the next few months we will give you the chance to choose, from a list we will provide you, a company in which you’ll be able to work for a couple of weeks, starting this December.

If you get chosen, you are going to work even while there are still some courses on and get some exams done. And depending on the company, you will be probably working on the holidays too. So we really suggest you to decide if it’s something you will be able to do, considering your appointments, tasks and abilities.”

Everyone began whispering low, talking to each other about the news.

“Taking part in this project will definitely help you now, because you’ll improve your practising, and maybe it will open a gateway of a career in the company. Not mentioning the project will give you extra credits point.” The whole class now was enthusiastic. Yet I felt something was wrong.

“Of course we will choose only the best students in the class, so hopefully this will push you to do better, always.”

The enthusiasm was quickly replaced by complaints.

#park hae jin #story #park hae jin x y/n #park har jin x reader #park haejin #kactor #kdrama #south korea #original #a place far away #writing in the spare time #writing #student #college

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szopenhauer · 4 years

Text

How was your day?: it wasn’t good.

Would you ever try to count to 5,000 for $5,000?: I’d try

When is the last time you took a picture of yourself?: last days

When did you last take a shower?: I’m going to take a bath soon

What song are you listening to?: The Weeknd - Blinding Lights

Last sentence you said aloud?: not sure what was last

What is the point of scented pens/pencils/erasers? ppl like to smell stuff I guess Do you buy/wear band-aids with cartoon characters on them? they’re usually not sticking well enough What do you think your reaction would be upon entering the White House? meh, they could spend those money better by helping ppl, nobody needs such a big house - president or not, we’re not in medieval times and guards would have less to do

Do you buy and wear crazy looking socks? I would like to Would you run down the street wearing a tutu, fishnets, & flippers? topless? for how much tho Have you ever grown your own sea monkeys or dinosaurs? nope

Did you ever own an Etch-a-Sketch? yes, I loved it so much, I miss it Do/did you ever have glow-in-the-dark stars on your ceiling? on my wall and furniture, I still have some left Does your house have an attic? it does Have you ever gone white-water rafting? no and don’t want to Does your grandma wear an apron when she cooks? she did How often do you need “me” time? all the time? :x Does it bother you that almost everything is done on computers now? sometimes, a little bit Have you ever gotten stuck in a revolving door? I haven’t What animal do you most resemble while eating? dunno but it reminds me of that yt video - how animals eat their food lmfao Would you play Jumanji, if given the chance? someone already plays it this year

Do you text/call while going to the bathroom? I might but prefer not to Do you always make sure your cell phone is charged before going somewhere? and powerbank too Did you get Happy Meals just for the toys as a kid? only once, I got Eeyore that I still own Have you ever seen your parents cry? of course

Do you often shift blame towards others? usually it’s other way around? Do you ever feel like you’re smarter than your boss? I don’t have a job Your very first best friend: Is he/she STILL your best friend? not counting my family - no Have you ever witnessed a crime? minor What’s the coolest personalized license plate you’ve ever seen? I saw a bunch :D Do you write grey or gray? grey, it doesn’t have 50 shades

If you make surveys, how do you decide about its title? I don’t add titles as you can see, that’s stupid

When are you going back to school? never?

What do you do when you tell a really bad joke? my jokes are so bad that they’re good if you know what I mean ;)

Do you like having a huge group of friends or would you rather have few close friends? few close

Do you watch the TV Show Skins? If so, who’s your favorite character? fragments

Can you get a strike at bowling? I never tried bowling but would like to

Do you swallow chewing gum? wtf

Were you into the Beanie Baby craze? nah Would you ever wish to ride a dolphin? nope, I’m not fond of dolphins Do you ever watch the news just for the weather forecast? my parents did and that was dumb, I don’t like/believe in weather forecats If your remote was missing, where is the most likely place you’d find it? in dad’s stuff Ever considered the thought that kangaroos technically have fanny packs? hehe

When was the last time you blew bubbles? not that long time ago from what I remember Did the last doctor’s office you were in have a crappy magazine selection? it did indeed Have you been to a restaurant where they cook the food in front of you? bakery only The last ball you threw was a… (baseball, basketball, etc.) childish ball for my niece Have you seen how much candidates for president are willing to spend for their campaign? it’s insane Have you ever caught a friend snooping in your room? I have and that’s why I am afraid of leaving ppl alone in my room Quick! Name the longest word starting with the letter ‘J’ you can think of: jurisdiction was the first that came to my mind Do you still write letters to people, even though there’s e-mail now? no longer but not because of e-mail’s existence

Have you ever taken a survey with a friend, listing both answers?: I tagged my friends in the past

Do you know a guy who has hair longer than yours?: not currently

What color was the last cup you drank out of?: it’s a llama mug (minty color)

If you’re in school, what do you do to fill in time between classes?: there was never enough time for me

Where was the last place you got lost?: mall or park

When was the last time you had cheesecake?: this year

When you last shed tears, was it because of a person?: partially

Other than yours, whose house did you last fall asleep at?: John and P

Have you ever had a significant other whose parents didn’t like you?: looks like it

What’s so unique about your computer?: what’s on it - pictures/memes/documents

What’s one thing you have never done? I didn’t do lots of stuff and don’t want to many of them actually

What is one trend you wish you have been a part of? I’m not into trends in general

Do you enjoy reading fanfictions? About who? Or do you write fanfictions, too? nah

What is something you own that you wish was in your favorite color? it’s not that important

Is there someone from your past that you wish you had dated? used to think that way, no longer

Can you snap with both your hands? If not, which hand can you snap with? both but not every single time

Do you like cosplays? I tried cosplays but it’s not for me and I’m a bit traumatised by it due to experiences from the past, they remind me of someone and not only so I prefer not to follow/look at those related to anime mostly

If you were to participate in one, what/who would you dress up as? I’d dress up as characters I relate to

Do you sometimes answer surveys with “Idk”/“Idr” because you’re too lazy? I just realized that I don’t, wow, I used to do that all the damn time

Are you usually open to trying a new food that you aren’t familiar with? am not

Have you ever acted like a bitch and used PMS as an excuse? I don’t use PMS nor period as an excuse as it’s actually a stereotype and shouldn’t be an argument besides painful/uncomfy/annoying physical sensations and being unable to do some stuff due to that fact

Do you know someone who brushes their teeth in the shower all the time? *shrug*

Have you ever tried doing that? Did you like it? Why or why not? tried and it’s not that good

Are you patient when it comes to instructing others? I’m not, sorry...

Do you listen to Panic At The Disco? nah

Name a band/artist you like that isn’t that popular.: I like many bands/artists that seem not very popular

Can you lift your significant other (your best friend if you’re single)?: can’t :(

Have you ever lost a pet you were attached to?: we had to give away

You can read minds; Whose mind do you snoop around in first?: hmm...

Do you ever talk to inanimate objects?: stuffed animals, kettle and fridge

Have you ever tried to fold a piece of paper more than 7 times?: possibly

Your best friend needs a kidney to survive; Do you give them one of your’s?: oh my...

Your brother breaks into your house; Do you press charges?: ... ghost?

Would you rather have a huge cat or a tiny dog?: tiny dog <3

Do you use your hands when you talk to emphasize what you are saying?: do I?

Are you afraid to ask for help when you know that you need it?: depends

Should adopted kids be allowed to find their birth parents if they want to?: I guess

You’re writing a novel; Is it horror, mystery, romance, etc.?: sci-fi/fantasy

Will you usually admit it when you’ve made a mistake? would say so

Does your name begin with a B, L, R, or T?: Z

Could you go a day without texting?: but she couldn’t and we don’t want to

Do you have a step-parent?: I don’t

If so, do you get along with them?: -

Do you have any nieces or nephews?: one

Does your current/last job require that you wear a uniform?: one of jobs that I had

Who is your 23rd phone contact and how do you know them?: I don’t have this many

If the last person you kissed proposed to you what would you say?: try me

Where is your dad right now?: sleeping

Are there any writing utensils close to you? several

Look up, what do you see? ceiling

Do you have a bigger upper or lower lip? lower

Do you have any screen names with spelling errors? luckily not

Open the nearest drawer and tell me what’s inside it: I know it’s empty, don’t have to open it

How many other rooms can you currently see into? my door is closed

Do you need to take the trash out? already done

Do you need to clean out a litter box right now? we don’t have a cat anymore

Are these questions reminding you of things you put off to do this survey? nah

How many days have you been wearing those clothes? 1

Do you like listening to 60’s music? some songs

Can you move your nose? many ways

Can you wiggle your ears? my dad can

How many songs have you downloaded this week? I don’t download songs

Would you rather be a pirate or robot? robot, can’t robot be a pirate tho?

Would you rather be a ghost or a zombie? ghost

Have you ever considered living in a bomb shelter? I’d be scared to live underground

If I gave you a piano and told you hit middle c, could you? nooo

do you think it’s weird for someone to have never tried soda? not really

which floor of your house/building are you on now? there’s basement under me and attic above me

would you ride a motorcycle if given the chance? (or have you?) I would, haven’t yet

what are your thoughts on reincarnation? (have you ever read up about it?) it’s possible

does your home have a balcony/deck/porch? balcony

how would you feel about traveling abroad alone? anxious

do you have an interesting passport? I don’t have a passport

what happens to your old clothes? I donate them, give them to ppl I know, reuse them, sell them etc.

who supports you financially? my parents

if you wanted to go to the movie cinema, how would you get there? walking then by bus then walk again

have you ever had a crush on a sibling’s friend or a friend’s sibling? minor

do you know much about feng shui? (do you use it?) not much, I don’t use it

what’s your favorite spot to read? librocubicularist

did you know that buddha is not considered a god to buddhists? ok

do you save tickets from movies, etc.? saved some

without looking him up, who was jim morrison? vocalist

do you have a nervous habit? several

would you be/are you a good role model to a younger sibling? nah

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canaryatlaw · 4 years

Text

okay, I’m sleepy. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to fall asleep right away because I had coke with dinner but I think I’ll be fine. today was overall pretty good. work was a LOT but ended up decent so I’ll take that. I woke up at 6:30, made it to court at like 8:20 which was good because I don’t like cutting it close to 8:30 when they start letting the public in and going through security is so much more awkward. It was really dumb that I technically had to go up to court and tell them the motion we filed should just be passed until the actual 11 am hearing. but the clerks are either completely incompetent or just being giant assholes and I was up there for over an hour just to say two sentences to the judge. in that time I got another case thrown on me to take care of but then my coworker finished up and took it back so that was helpful. but yeah, I got downstairs and client for the hearing we were not going to end up having was here. so we sat in my office and talked for a bit before heading back up to court. I made sure she was in the safe room before anything even started. so we got called up to the bench and I “served” the dude with the motion by passing him a copy and the judge basically read it, asked me two questions, and then granted it so that was much easier than I expected haha. there was one moment when she gave the dude a chance to say whatever objections he must have and he started on his whole bullshit spiel and she was just like “no that’s enough” and it was great. so that was done for today at least. We had to take the client back to work on some other things, and it ended up being positive even though the case is just really heavy (and I don’t normally go into any detail like this but I’m honestly scared he’s going to snap and hurt her and just knowing there is literally nothing else she can do to protect herself is devastating to think about). so once that was done I was kinda relieved. the rest of the afternoon I did normal boring shit, and after 4 just mostly ended up talking with my work buddy about random shit and politics (mostly about how much we loathe Joe Biden but know we will be forced to vote for him anyway) and we ended up leaving like, ten minutes early lol such rebels I know. our supervisor was out today because one of her kids was sick, which I was a little like uhhhhhhh about because she had previously said a parent of one of the kids in her child’s school was a teacher at one of the schools where there was a confirmed coronavirus case, and he was quaratining but his family members weren’t, including his children I’m assuming, so I’m just like uhhhhhhh.....please do not have the coronavirus child I have enough to deal with already. but yeah, I got home a little earlier since things are less crowded if you get out just before 5. Friend came over for Legends, we had said we were going to get ramen but decided to save that for another night and ended up getting popeyes, which was very good chicken wise at least (and we all know the issues I have with chicken) but all of their sides are “cajun” which means in a practical sense that I can’t eat it, except their coleslaw which was all mayo-y and gross so I did not end up eating that. CAN I TALK ABOUT LEGENDS THO. ohmygod. I’m just still so overwhelmed by everything in this episode. definitely one of the better ones in quite a while. I know I’m a lot more invested in Ray and Nora than most people but tonight was such a beautiful way to bring their stories together even if they are writing them off (to which we say “Fuck Phil Klemmer,” children) and just like, having known there had been another proposed path for them some months back that was very, very bad, I’m glad we at least got this instead. AND COURTNEY FUCKING FORD EVERYONE. god I can’t wait to see her at the kansas city con I missed her so fucking much. everything she says and does as Nora is so much more authentic when you know Courtney and know how upfront she is about helping people deal with trauma in their lives and very open about her own experiences and how she got through them. She just really has the most kind, beautiful soul that just shines right through Nora and it makes me so happy that she got to portray this character and bring such truth and raw vulnerability to the character that ultimately made such a beautiful ending (and again, for that we say FUCK PHIL KLEMMER, everyone). so I clearly had a lot of Feels about that and probably went a little off livetweeting on the legends podcast account twitter but oh well they knew what they were getting themselves into when they asked me to livetweet lol. anyway. after legends friend went home and I watched tonight’s episode of the resident which was also very good. I watched the news for a bit, and then showered and started getting ready for bed, and now I’m here. It’s just three minutes past midnight and I am very sleepy, so I’m going to go to bed now. Goodnight friends. Stay lovely.

#daily journal #march 2020 #Rachel watches Legends of Tomorrow

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hotsterfield · 6 years

Text

Deadly Duo pt 3 - Hitman!Harrison

Word count: 5964

Summary: He’s one of the most dangerous people in the United Kingdom. She just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time, and he never leaves a loose end

Teaser 1 | teaser 2

Masterlist

Credit: Moodboard by the wonderful @monicaagraz . @thewiseandfree gave me the idea by saying I had a killer Harrison fic, so that’s exactly what I made. And thank you to @misformarvel for helping me plan most of this series

A/N: I’m going to try my best to update every 2 weeks. So every other Sunday (or Monday), there will hopefully be a new part! I hope you enjoy this one

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Getting released from the hospital and going home had been weird. She didn’t know what to do or how to act around him, and he tried to be nice, but at the same time, he really wanted to make sure she was safe. Already from the moment they had arrived at his apartment, after getting her some of her stuff, he had broken down how the rules were going to be.

She wasn’t going to go out without him, if she was going to do anything that required her moving her upper body, he was going to help her. Most importantly, he wasn’t going to leave her alone for a second of the day.

“Do we have to be in the same room all of the time?” She questioned. There were so many flaws in his plan, and she was most definitely going to point them out.

“Yes. I’m not leaving you alone. At least just till I know it’s safe to leave you alone” He tried to send her a small smile. He wanted this to work out, but he also wanted her to be safe.

“What about tonight? Are we going to sleep in the same room, or are you just going to watch me sleep?” He did have a big bed, so she figured she’d be alright if they shared a bed, but she didn’t really want to share a bed with him. If she was honest, she didn’t really want him too close, she didn’t want anyone too close to her.

“You get the bed, and I’ll sleep on the floor in front of the door. In that way, you can’t do anything to hurt yourself while I’m sleeping” He responded after considering it for a second.

“I don’t plan on doing that, but alright. I can live with that for a few weeks I guess.” She would always prefer to sleep on her own, but something told her this was as good as it was going to get.

“Alright. I’ve thought this through” He said confidently, making her roll her eyes.

“What about when one of us needs to use the bathroom?” She knew he hadn’t thought about it, but it was, without a doubt, the most flawed part of his planning.

“I… Might not have thought about that one” He admitted.

“Great” She gave him a big fake smile, before dropping the smile. “There’s no way you’re coming to the bathroom with me. And I’m definitely not going with you. Also, showers are hopefully going to be a thing”

“I am…” He stopped for a minute thinking about what he was going to do. “I’m gonna remove all sharp objects from the bathroom. Problem solved”

“Don’t you have work? You got to make money somehow” She was going to be without income for a few weeks, but fortunately, she was promised to still have a job when she returned, but he still had to make money somehow.

“I’m taking the next few weeks off. I’m telling Tom that I’m not taking any jobs for a while” He had sorted that from the hospital before they had even released her.

“Tom? As in Tom Holland? Can you just tell a mobster you want time off? I thought that’s the kind of stuff that gets you killed” Now she was in a place, where she realised how dangerous he actually was. She knew he was dangerous, but something about him just made her forget. He just had that innocent, sweet guy look, and it was hard to picture him being a dangerous hitman. Of course, she had seen just how quickly his attitude could change, and he could be terrifying.

“Normally he’s not happy when people say they’re taking a break, but since I’m the guy who kills people for him, he doesn’t have anyone to kill me” There was a smile on his lips, and he clearly saw something funny in it. Y/n, on the other hand, didn’t think it was entertaining at all. “And it helps that I’m his best friend”

“Right. Best friend with the guy who runs the mob. Kills people for the mob. I forgot that part for ma minute” For the first time she realized who she was getting involved with. She had really thought about how it might affect her, staying with a hitman.

“Don’t worry. You’re not going to get involved with the mob or Tom. And definitely no murders for you either” It was like he had read her mind, trying to assure her that she was safe.

“That’s comforting. I don’t really feel like killing anyone or see another dead body” Somehow it felt like forever since she had seen him standing over the dead body, but the image was permanently printed in her head.

“Yeah. I’m sorry for that. The dead body part of it” He apologized.

“It’s alright. It’s not your fault” She said the last part, almost out of habit. She didn’t really mean it, but she didn’t know what else to say either.

“It kind of is my fault tho. I did do the killing part” He couldn’t help but chuckle a bit, finding the irony in her words. It was all his fault, and it all came down to that one murder.

“Do you… Do you think that’s funny? That you killed someone?” Shivers were going down her spine, just by thinking about how comfortable he was with death. It was terrifying, and he didn’t even seem bothered by it.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. Really sorry about that one. That’s a bad habit” He shrug.

“Joking about your murders is a habit?” The uneasy feeling was still there, and it was making her anything but comfortable.

“Dark humor?” He tried, noticing how uncomfortable it made her. Of course, it was going to make her uncomfortable, and he was screaming at himself for not thinking about what he was saying.

“Right, how about we just not talk. Because, this is kind of weird for me”

“Right”

***

There hadn’t been much talking for the rest of the day, and just like he had said, he pulled out a mattress for himself, and placed it by the door, leaving the bed to her. It was all done without a word, and he just sent her a small smile as she got in the bed.

Harrison was fast asleep, but Y/n didn’t get any sleep that night. The bed was comfortable, and it was like laying on a cloud, but she couldn’t find a comfortable position, she couldn’t relax.

Every time she closer her eyes, she kept seeing the man that assaulted her, and everytime she was starting to drift off, she felt like she was dying again, making her wake up instantly. Her heart was beating out of her chest, and all through the night, she felt scared.

At some point through the night, the image in her changed. It went from a stranger to Harrison. At this point, cshe didn’t know if she was awake or sleeping, or something in between, but no matter what she just wanted the night to end.

Images of Harrison was going through her mind. Him standing over a dead body, him just standing in front of her, blood splattered on a white shirt and bloody hands. The stranger’s touch had been replaced with Harrison’s, and she was on the verge of crying. A lump was stuck in her throat and she was trying to muffle her sobs.

She didn’t want him to wake up, a voice in her head telling her it would only make her nightmares real. Even if that wasn’t the case, she didn’t want him to know how terrified she was of, not just of him, but of everything. Right there in the middle of the night, she was broken and scared.

When the first sunlight started coming through the window, she felt like she was able to breathe again. Just the small amount of light was making her feel so much safer than she had felt in the night, but she still wasn’t able to fall asleep her. As soon as she started to drift off, she would wake up and gasp for air, a movement that reminded her of the constant pain of her ribs.

About the time when Harrison woke up, she had given up on getting any sleep. She was just laying in the bed, staring out into the air.

“Goodmorning. How’d you sleep?” He asked, a cheerful tone in his voice. Harrison couldn’t help but be a bit happy to wake up to someone else, someone to take care of in a nice way. He didn’t mind the killing, but it was nice to have something else in his life for a while, or at least he thought it was going to be nice

“Fine” She responded with a tired voice. She was exhausted, and her body needed sleep. She felt numb, but she didn’t really mind. It was better than the memory of someone’s hands on her.

“Right” He mumbled, getting a feelings that she didn’t really want to talk, so he wasn’t going to push it. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable, so maybe if he just gave her a bit of space, she’d get more comfortable. Well, he was still going to be around, but that was all he was going to do.

She got up and made her way to the couch. She didn’t bother changing her clothes, or even eating breakfast. She was too tired for her body to feel hunger, so there was no reason for her to try to get something down.

Harrison noticed this. He noticed how tired she looked, and he knew she hadn’t slept. It wasn’t possible for anyone to look that tired after a full night’s sleep. If he was honest, it didn’t shock him that she hadn’t slept.

She was sleeping at a new place, with a stranger in the room, and not just any stranger. He could potentially kill her, and she had already been through a lot in the past week, so it made sense if she had some trouble falling asleep. Maybe she would be able to just pass out on the couch, but it didn’t really go that way.

The day was passing by slowly for both Harrison and Y/n. She was on the couch, trying to get some sleep all day, but she still wasn’t able to get any sleep. It went on like the night before. Every time she was close to drifting away, she would wake up in an instant.

She found it a lot more frustrating in the daylight, than she had during the night. She felt safe in the light, she wasn’t scared to close her eyes, so why was it so impossible for her to fall asleep?

Harrison noticed her struggling with sleeping after a few hours. She was starting to turn pale and bags were appearing under her eyes. She looked completely exhausted, and just about ready to give up, when Harrison decided that he couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

“Darling, do you have trouble sleeping?” He asked, concern filling his voice.

“A little, yeah” Her voice was barely above a whisper, she was too tired to even talk.

“I can’t say I’m surprised”, He said to himself. He knew what trauma could do to the body, and since was falling asleep when she had been dying, her body was remembering the feeling of sleeping, and connecting it with dying, so it was trying to prevent that from happening. Her body was just trying to save her, even when there was nothing to save her from. “I might have some sleeping pills, if you want them”

“I don’t like taking pills”, She said while shaking her head. He raised his eyebrows, ready to say something, but he knew it was too soon. It’s something he would’ve been quick to point out with with Tom, but it might not be that funny to her.

“Hmm. What makes you relax? There’s gotta be something we can do, to make you relax enough for you to fall asleep? Put on a movie, get you more blankets, music maybe?” He sent her a small smile, before continuing. “You need to sleep. I know it’s hard, but you can’t go long without sleep. We need to figure out how to get you to fall asleep”

“I usually watch Grease when I’m sick. It’s comforting” A yawn came over her lips, and her eyes were dropping a bit.

“Grease it is then” He was already finding the movie on Netflix and putting it on. He was sitting in the chair, watching it with her. Every once in a while, he would glance over to check on her, relaxing when he saw that she had finally fallen asleep.

When he had brought her home, he didn’t expect to worry as much as he did. He didn’t even consider that he would end up caring about how she was doing, but he didn’t. He was getting past the point of making sure that she was safe and alright, because he felt guilty, and he was starting to actually care about her.

She looked so peaceful when she was sleeping, just like she had done on the first night. He prefered her face without tear stains on her cheeks, and maybe he even preferred that she was here because she wanted to be. Maybe he didn’t mind that she was around at all.

***

The next few days went by in a bit of a blur. She couldn’t sleep at night, so she was half sleeping all through the day. Harrison slept through the night, so the conversations between the two were limited.

When Harrison was sure she was sleeping, he would go into another room and work out. Just because he was taking a break from working, it didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to stay in shape. It was also a nice way for him to relax, a way for him to not think about her.

He was punching and kicking a boxing bag, sweat running down his forehead, his shirt sticking to his muscles. He was completely focused on the bag, so he didn’t hear her come in. She had woken up not too long ago, and since she didn’t feel like staying on the couch she had gone looking for him.

She stood by the door, watching him. She could see the muscles moving in his back with every punch. she could see part of a tattoo under his shirt, but she couldn’t see what it was. Anyone who saw him like that, could tell you how strong he was, and she would definitely not want to be on the receiving end of his punches. He heard some light shuffling, which made him turn around.

“Oh, hi”, He said, sending her a smile.

“Hi”, She said, quietly admiring his shape. His shirt was stuck to his body, showing off a set of abs. This was the first time she saw him without long sleeves, so she could see exactly how tones his arms were, and she could see the ink on his arms. “I didn’t know you boxed. Or had tattoos”

“Yeah, i guess there’s a lot you don’t know about me” His hand unconsciously went up to touch the one on his forearm, not necessarily to hide it from her, but it did.

“Yeah, i guess. We haven’t really talked that much, have we?” She asked, and he could tell there was something else. She didn’t just walk in here to let him know that they hadn’t talked much. “Why haven’t we talked?”

“What do you mean?” There was almost a sad expression on her face, and it confused him. Did she want to talk to him? He had thought it was better to give her some space, because clearly a lot of things about him, made her uncomfortable, as it should.

“Well. I mean. I don’t know” She was looking for the right words to say, cursing herself for not having planned what to say, before starting a conversation with him. “I just thought that it would be nice to actually be able to talk to someone while I’m here, to talk to you. You’re going to be around all of the time anyway, and i guess I’m feeling a little lonely, maybe”

“Uh, I’m. Yeah. Yeah, sure. We can. We can talk, if that’s what you want, I don’t mind” He wet his lips, not really knowing what to say or do. Did he continue boxing, or did he stop? Did she want to talk to him now, or should he take a shower, because he needed one.

“Right. Then maybe we can get to know each other a bit? So we know just a little bit about other” She looked down, somehow embarrassed by how lonely she felt in his home. She was used to be alone, but not lonely. “I just thought it nice to have something to do while I’m here, you know? Otherwise, it’s going to be some long weeks”

“Yeah, sure. Why don’t i take a shower, and then we can talk? Get to know each other” He smiled as she looked back up at him. He had a charming smile, that could make any girl’s heart melt, even her’s.

She responded with a quiet nod, before returning to the couch, while he made his way to the bathroom. There was a peaceful silence for a few seconds, before she could hear the water in the shower running. She sat there for a few minutes, calmly listening to the water running.

Her peaceful moment was interrupted promptly, when the front door flew up and footsteps moved into the apartment. She turned her head to see who it was, and caught a glimpse of a young man, who didn’t look too friendly.

“Who the fuck are you, and where is Harrison?” He asked as soon as he saw her, his voice harsh.

“He’s in the shower. He’ll be out in a second” She looked the man in the eyes, feeling uneasy with him around.

“Who are you? Why are you here?” He demanded to know. His jaw was clenched, and he looked angry. “Don’t tell me you’re the reason he’s taking a break? Is he taking a break because of ofa girl?”

“I-uh. I guess? He was the one who insisted that I stayed here for a few weeks” The man wasn’t pleased with her answer at all, and she didn’t really know what to do or say.

“Harrison insisted you stayed? Why? Who are you, since you’re so important to him? He would never just go on a break, without a good reason, which you aren’t” The man walked closer to her, his eyes never leaving her.

“I don’t know. It’s just till I’m alright, and then I’ll be out of here. As soon as I can take care of myself, I’ll leave. It’s only temporary” She responded. She was still on the couch, but her gut was telling not to let the man come too close to her.

“You’re the one he asked information about, aren’t you?” She slowly nodded, as the realization hit him. “You’re that cop’s daughter!” She flinched as he raised his voice. He was already pulling out a gun and pointing it at her, making her nervous. “What the hell are you doing here? What did Harrison tell you, because it thinks it’s a little bit suspicious that I suddenly have a cop hot on my trail, while his daughter is staying with my best mate”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Harrison didn’t tell me anything. I’ve barely talked to him for the past few days. I don’t know that much about him, and I sure don’t know anything about you. I don’t even know who you are!” Her heart was beating fast, and she had a feeling that this man wasn’t mucking around.

“I don’t believe you. Harrison told you something, and you told it dad, which led him to me. So if I were you, I’d give me a damn good reason to why I shouldn’t just kill you right now” The gun was pointed right at her head, his finger on the trigger.

“Harrison didn’t tell me anything. I don’t have contact with my dad. He kicked me out, so why should I want to help him? How could I help him?” She was breathing faster, something that made her ribs hurt, but the adrenaline in her body made the pain go away.

She was completely focused on the gun pointed at her, not daring to look away from it. The man in front of her, kept his eyes on her, not wanting to give her a chance to move away. None of them paid attention to their surroundings.

“That’s not a good enough reason, darling” He shook his head a little, his finger tightening on the trigger. In that same minute, Harrison walked out of the bathroom. His hair was still wet, and he was only wearing a pair of sweatpants.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” He exclaimed, quickly stepping in front of Tom, so the gun was pointing at him. As he stood in front of her, she felt relieved. At least now she’d be safe for a while. “What the hell, Tom?”

“Haz, move out of the way. Your little girlfriend here is in contact with the police, so I’m taking care of it” Tom was glaring at his friend, anger making his eyes darker than usual.

“Not in my apartment, you’re not” Harrison glared right back at him, not the slightest bit afraid of him. She took the moment to take a closer look at one of the tattoos on his back. It was a large tree, with many leaves falling, but none of the tree. “She’s not in contact with the police. She hasn’t done anything to anyone, so I don’t know why the fuck you’re pointing a gun at her”

“Her dad is a fucking cop, Harrison! Do you really expect me to believe that it’s a coincidence that her dad has arrested one of my best men, around the same time as you ask for a break because of her?” Tom moved his finger away from the trigger but didn’t move the gun away. “I don’t believe that one bit”

“I know. I know about her dad, but I also know that whoever your rat is, it isn’t her. She doesn’t know anything, because I haven’t told her anything. She knows about me, but she doesn’t have anything on you” Harrison was trying to talk calmly to him, trying not to escalate anything. She could see how tense his shoulders were, how tense he was, and she knew he wasn’t unaffected by the situation.

“How can you trust her? She’s not one of us. You know the rules, we don’t bring strangers into business. You’ve never done anything like this before, so why would you suddenly move so fast with a girl you don’t know? Why would you tell her about you?” Tom finally put the gun down. He was still angry, but he wasn’t on the verge to kill someone.

“It’s a long story, Tom. Just trust me on this. I have never made a mistake, and I’m not starting to now” Harrison glanced back at the girl behind him, checking to see if she was okay.

“Tell me the story then. Prove to me that she’s not the one I’m looking for” Tom wanted to trust his best friend, he really did, but he knew that if Harrison was right, the problem was with one of his men.

“She saw me kill someone, so I brought her here to scare into not talking”

“You’re doing a really bad job then, because she’s anything but scared” Tom interrupted before Harrison had even started.

“Just shut up and listen, will you?” Harrison sighed, before continuing. “I couldn’t scare her. This girl is tougher than anyone I’ve seen, so it didn’t really work. I’ll spare you the details, but she managed to get away. I found her pretty quick, but at that point s, he was trying to kill herself, so i stopped her. I broke some of her ribs, trying to keep her alive, so i took her home from the hospital, and offered to let her stay here, just till she’s okay”

“She’s a witness, why didn’t you just kill her? I know you don’t like that part, and i respect that, but you could’ve just let her die” Tom said coldly. He didn’t like the girl, and knowing she was a witness didn’t help her case.

“I couldn’t. I thought about it, but i couldn’t do it. It would still be my fault if she died” Again, Harrison glanced back at her, just to check is she was okay.

“You could’ve done a lot of things. You could’ve told the hospital she was insane, then you’d be sure that if she went to the police, nobody would listen to her. You could’ve called me, and i would’ve taken care of it. I can still take care of it” Tom offered.

“She can’t tell the police, Tom. It won’t be an issue. I’m taking care of her, while her ribs are healing, and i won’t let you kill her. If anything happens to her, because of you, I won’t hesitate to kill you” Harrison warned him. “Actually. If you hurt her, I’ll kill Paddy, then your mum, the twins, your dad and then you”

“Why do you care so much about her? You haven’t even known her for a week, and yet you’re ready to kill me and my family for her? What’s going on with you?” Tom asked. The anger was finally fading, and he was starting to get a bit concerned for his friend. This was so unlike him, and Tom had to know why. “Just tell me why she’s so important, please. If she’s not the one who's been feeding the cops information, then I have a problem with one of my men, and i would need your help”

Harrison looked back at Y/n once again. He wanted to tell Tom, he wanted to tell him everything, but he knew she would hate hearing it. She would hate to hear the words, because it would only remind her of what had happened, and he knew she didn’t need that.

“I’ll tell you, but in the bedroom” Was all he said, before going into the bedroom, and closing the door as soon as Tom had followed him.

“Alright, so what is it?”

“She was raped. The night before i ran into her. She tried to report it to the police, but they wouldn’t let her. They just sent her away” Harrison started. “I would’ve left her at the hospital, but i couldn’t. I couldn’t save my sister, but i saved her. For once, i didn’t end a life, but I’m the reason someone is alive”

“Haz, she’s not like your sister. What happened wasn’t your fault, and you don’t have to make up for that. You already saved this girl’s life, so what more can you do for her?” Tom asked. He was starting to understand why Harrison was protective, but it wasn’t rational.

“I know. I didn’t think I would care, but i do. I care a lot, if I’m honest. I shouldn’t, i barely know her, but i can’t help it. I like having her around. I love seeing her face when she sleeps. So looks so peaceful and innocent, and i want her to stay that way. I don’t want anything bad to happen to her ever again, and if I can do anything to prevent that, I will” Saying the words out loud was strange. It felt like he was telling a deep secret he had been carrying for years, and it felt nice to let it out.

“You’ve never talked about anyone like that. You’ve never been this protective or caring” Tom mumbled, taking his time to let the words sink in. “Harrison, do you like her?”

“I’m starting to, and i don’t know what to do. I want her to be safe, i want her to be happy. She looks so amazing when she smiles, and i love it” Harrison had a small smile on his lips, just by thinking about her, and it made Tom a bit uneasy.

“Alright. As your friend, i want you to be happy, so i won’t do anything to her. I’ll even help you out if you need it” Tom started, not really sure if wanted to continue, but he had to. “Just be careful. She’s not one of us. I don’t approve of who she is, and you couldn’t have picked a worse girl to fall for. If she becomes a problem for me, you’ll be too. I hope it doesn’t happen, but..”

“I know, i know. She’s tough Tom, it won’t break her. I think she can handle a lot more than me, if it came down to it. You can point a gun at her, and she won’t flinch. I don’t think anyone could get a word out of her, if it came down to it” He bit his lip, taking a deep breath. “But I don’t think it’s going to matter. She’s only here for a few weeks, and when she’s okay she’s going to leave. I don’t think i want her to, but i don’t think she wants to stay. She has seen me kill someone, and I don’t think there’s a way back from that”

“You also saved her life, and maybe that matters more. I’m not going to approve till the day she’s locked to you for life, but it had always been that way. Girlfriends don’t know about the business, unless they’re in it. I never had to actually remind you, because you never cared enough about a girl” Tom couldn’t help but smile a little. “I’m happy you finally found someone. If she didn’t know, i wouldn’t have cared, but she do and that changes everything. I trust you, so i won’t interfere, but i don’t trust her”

“Thank you. It’s messy right now, i know. As soon as she’s okay and can do stuff on her own, I’ll be back to work. I just can’t leave her alone right now”

“Well, I need you now. That’s why I’m here in the first place” Now Tom was looked apologetic. Harrison had never asked for a break before, so Tom didn’t really want to ruin that. If anyone deserved a vacation, it was Harrison. “I don’t want to ask you, but I need your help. At least one of my men is in contact with the police, and I need to know who it is. I’ll take care of it, but I need you to find out who it is and just… Make them know it’s serious”

“Tom, I can’t leave her on her own, so I can’t help you this time” His thoughts were already back to her, and all he wanted to do was to check if she was okay and apologize for Tom bursting in the way he did.

“What if I stay with her? Would that be alright? You can go do your job, and she won’t be alone” Tom offered after a few minutes of thinking. He didn’t want to stay with her, but if he wanted Harrison’s help, he might just have to.

“Give me a minute to talk to her, yeah? I’ll see how she feels about it. If she doesn’t mind, I’ll do it” He received a short nod from Tom, and with that, he walked back out to her. “Hey love, are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about it” She said, but she still looked worried. “Does he still want to kill me?”

“No, no. I’m going, to be honest with you, and tell you that he doesn’t approve of you being here, but he’s not going to do anything to you” He walked over to her, and sat down next to her. “He needs me to do a job for him. He offered to stay with you”

“So you want me to stay here with a guy who was about to kill me 5 minutes ago? You told me I wouldn’t get involved with Tom Holland or the mob, but now I am. Harrison, what if he changes his mind when you’re not here?” She didn’t want Harrison to leave, she didn’t feel safe without him.

“He won’t, I promise you that. If he does anything to you, I’ll give him hell and he knows it. I made sure he knows” He assured her. “As soon as the job is done, he’ll be out of here”

“How long will you be? How much will I have to talk to him and such?” She asked. “I guess I don’t really have a choice, but I’m not going to talk to him”

“You don’t have to. You don’t have to say a word to him if you don’t want to. I’ll only be a few hours, and I’ll try and be as quick as I can” He promised.

“Sure. Go to work, do what you need to do” She sighed, watching him carefully as he walked back to the bedroom to get Tom.

Harrison rushed out of the door, and as soon as he was gone, Tom walked closer to the girl on the couch. He wasn’t going to hurt her, he was just going to let her know that he could if he wanted to.

“I’m sorry about before. I can see that you’re important to Harrison, so I’m not going to hurt you or do anything to you” Tom sat down on the chair, keeping a short distance to her. “But if you hurt my mate, I won’t hesitate to kill you. He’s a good guy, and I’m not telling you that you should go fall in love with him or anything like that. I’m just letting you know, that I don’t want you to hurt him. If he makes a move on you, I’m just asking you to turn him down nicely. I’m asking as his friend, and not as a mob leader”

“He can kill me, I’d be an idiot to hurt him” She felt like she was stating the obvious. “But why would he make a move on me?”

“He cares about you, and he might confuse caring with love. Or he might end up caring so much that it turns into love. I don’t know if it’s ever going to get to that point, but I’m just being prepared for the worst. I’ll do anything to keep him from getting hurt” He knew there was a good chance that Harrison was already getting a crush without realizing it, and Tom was just hoping that she didn’t feel the same.

“I don’t think that’s going to be an issue. I plan on being out of here as soon as possible. I don’t want any part of this. I don’t want to be part of anything related to you or your mob. So if you let me, I’m going to stay away from you and Harrison as soon as I’m fine on my own”

“Good. If you stay out of my way, I promise you, you won’t have any issues with my mob. I’ll make sure everyone knows to stay away from you” He promised, already looking forward to the day she was out of Harrison’s life.

“Good”

Part 4

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